On The Notion That Women Talk Too Much

Communication is essential in survival and the most basic form of

communication is verbal communication or talking. With this in mind, there is an
idea, rooted in mere observation and perhaps in a certain level of prejudice too, that is
repeated over and over again throughout the centuries that it has already been
accepted as truth: that women talk too much. In Janet Holmes’ article entitled
“Women Talk Too Much”, she presented arguments stemming from the result of
various research that told otherwise.
Holmes’ concluded that the question whether women talked to much cannot be
answered by a straight “yes or no” but rather with “it depends”. Her article presented
numerous contexts that proved women were more silent than men when it came to
assertive communication and were less dominant in discussions during formal
settings. She also stated that women were more likely to contribute in more private
settings where communication is done to maintain or establish relationships, or in
situations where they could be socially confident. Finally, Holmes concluded that the
matter would still be under continuous debate as long as the floor is equated with
influence.
As a young woman growing up in a male-dominated society, I think that the work
of Janet Holmes is a staggering reflection of what women are going through and their
battle against stereotypes. She presented her article with proverbs from various
countries who believed that women talked too much, a thing of stereotype. Holmes
also showed the contradiction between such belief and the results of numerous
research. Finally, Holmes gave readers a comprehensive enumeration of contexts
where men are more dominant talkers and where women had more contribution than
usual, even adding the social factors that made them behave in such way.
Holmes included several quotes that embellishes the stereotype of women talking
too much. Such goes an English proverb that punctuates the English belief that
women are extremely talkative. “Women’s tongues are like lambs’ tails - they are
never still.” Proverbs mirror beliefs and beliefs influence people’s attitudes. This is
why stereotypes of such are dangerous as they discourage women into silence and
why Holmes was correct in using these proverbs to reflect what women are going
through.
To counter these stereotypes, Holmes included in her article several researches.
Holmes presented first the review of Canadians Deborah James and Janice Drakich
whose results said that women talked more than men in only 2 studies, leaving 67 of
the 69 studies showing that men talked more than women. Furthermore, Holmes also
added that a research in New Zealand, men generally dominated the talking time.
Evidence from research conducted in classrooms also support the fact that boys do
more talking than girls in classroom discussions.
Finally, Holmes gave situations in which males were more dominating in
conversations than women, or when women were more contributing in conversations
than men. Holmes noted that men were more active in conversations that results in
assertion of status and dominance. On the contrary, she noted that women were more
in conversations that showed support and would gladly participate under topics that
they are naturally believed to be experts in. Women could also be pressured into
silence because they believed that being more dominant in conversations under topics
that are normally on the “male-turf” would warrant them negative impressions from
their listeners.
In my own opinion, I believe that that Janet Holmes’ work is informative and
empowering. It is informative because it showed truth to the otherwise fallacious
belief that circulates in society and continuously feed the negative stereotype that
pressures women into silence. It is empowering because now that women know the
truth and the reason behind these remarks, they will be able to overcome these
obstacles and contribute meaningfully in communication without giving in to fear and
pressure. To add, I think that it is quite frightening to speak and conclude that women
talk too much when in fact it’s not entirely true. It is even more frightening how this
idea was so well-believed that even proverbs speak them. Nonetheless, in a male-
dominated world, one can say that it is a struggle to be a woman. To speak and
believe such a thing about women, perhaps it is because men would rather have
women silent than talking.