Stories

Alberto’s New Neighbours

by Chris Rose

Alberto took one look at his new neighbours and knew that his life was going to get more
difficult. He watched them arrive in their big, noisy car and watched them get out. There they
were, two of them, as big and as noisy as their car, and smelly and stupid as well.

'Terrible!' he thought. 'How am I going to put up with them?' He went to tell Mimi. Mimi was the
friend he lived with.
'Have you seen the new neighbours?' he asked her.
'No' she said. 'Who are they?'
'Two of them. The ones we don’t like. Big and noisy and stupid and smelly. Just like they always
are.'
'Oh, no' said Mimi. 'How awful! Still, I suppose we can just ignore them.'
'I suppose you’re right' agreed Alberto. 'We’ll just have to ignore them.'

For a few days, then, Alberto and Mimi tried to ignore their new neighbours. When the
neighbours went out for a walk, Alberto and Mimi didn’t say hello to them. When the neighbours
were in their garden, Alberto and Mimi went inside. This was ok for a few days, but, perhaps
inevitably, things didn’t stay this way …

One day Alberto woke up from his sleep to find one of the neighbours in his garden. 'Mimi!' he
shouted. 'Have you seen this!? He’s in our garden!!!! Look!'
'How terrible' said Mimi. 'Let’s call our staff and make sure they get rid of him immediately!'

Mimi went off to call their staff. Two minutes later Alberto and Mimi’s head of staff was out in
the garden trying to get rid of the unwelcome neighbour. 'Go on!' he shouted. 'Get out of here!
Go home!' The neighbour didn’t say anything, but gave Alberto and Mimi’s head of staff a dirty
look, then he went back into his garden. Alberto and Mimi felt better, and then asked their head
of staff to prepare their lunch for them.

However, it wasn’t enough. Over the next few days Alberto and Mimi often found one or other
or both of their new neighbours walking around their own garden. It was terrible. To show how
they felt, Alberto and Mimi went into their neighbours’ garden, at night, when the neighbours
were inside, and broke all the flowers.

The next morning one of the neighbours came to talk to Alberto.

'Hey!' he said. 'Hey you!' Alberto ignored him, but he continued talking. 'You came into our
garden last night and broke all the flowers!' Alberto didn’t say anything, but gave his neighbour a
dirty look. 'Now I’m in trouble!' continued his neighbour. 'They think I did it!'
'Who are ‘they’?' asked Alberto.
'My owners, of course … ' replied the neighbour.
'Owners !!???' said Alberto. 'You have ‘owners’?'
'Course we do' said his neighbour. 'Don’t you?'
'Oh no' replied Alberto. 'We have staff.'

Alberto went to tell Mimi that the neighbours didn’t have staff, but they had owners.

'That’s not a surprise' said Mimi. 'That explains everything. That’s why they’re so noisy and
smelly and stupid. We need to make their "owners" become "staff".'

The next day, Alberto and Mimi were actually very friendly with their new neighbours. They
tried to explain how to make their owners become "staff."

'Listen' said Alberto to them. 'It’s very easy. First, understand that the house is your house, not
theirs … '
'And second' said Mimi, 'make sure that you are always clean.'
'Make sure they give you food whenever you want!'
'Sit on the newspaper while they are reading it!'
'Sleep as much as possible – on their beds!'
'And finally, try not to bark, but to miaow instead.'

But it was no good. The neighbours just didn’t understand. After a week, they gave up.

'It’s no good' said Mimi. 'They’ll never understand – dogs have owners, cats have staff.'

The Birth of a Star

by Chris Rose

June 5th 2006

Henry looks carefully into the telescope which lets him see far, far away, as far away as the
distant nebulae on the far edges of the Milky Way. Henry is an astronomer. He looks at the sky,
and at stars in particular. Even though he spends much of his time looking at detailed computer
reports, which are just lists and lists of numbers, his favourite thing about his job is looking
through the telescope. And today he is very excited. He isn’t sure yet, but he thinks he has seen a
dense cloud which might be the beginning of a new star.

July 5th 2006

Henry is still looking for a tiny point of light in the sky. He checks the lists and lists of numbers
that his computer produces, and tries to make sense of them. He tries to turn the basic data into
an image, a picture of the star he hopes to see, but it is not yet possible.

He arrives home feeling tired. His wife Anna sits down next to him. “I’ve got some news…” she
says.

August 5th 2006

Henry is so excited about being a father that he has forgotten about his star. Anna is feeling sick
and tired. Henry is no longer thinking about nebulae and clouds and gases. He is thinking about
pushchairs and nappies. 

September 5th 2006

Anna and Henry go to the doctor. Anna has an ultrasound scan. Henry is used to seeing distant
images of planets and stars and clouds, and now he looks at this image. It almost looks like a
cloud, but it is much clearer. He can see the outline of a head, the features of a face. And he
realises that this means much more to him than the distant stars he is used to looking at.

October 5th 2006

Anna finally starts to get fatter. Henry is feeling terrified. For the first time now, he realises
exactly what it means. In a few months time, he will be a father. 

November 5th 2006

Anna looks at her tummy and now starts to feel that there is another living person inside her. She
thinks about Henry’s job, and remembers how excited Henry was a few months ago when he
thought that he could see a new star.

December 5th 2006

Henry thinks that Anna looks a bit like a whale, but that she is very beautiful anyway. He thinks
that next Christmas everything will be very, very different

January 5th 2007 

Anna feels like she wants to sleep all the time. She feels like the baby already wants to come out.
The baby is kicking her from inside. She feels like a football. She can’t wait to become a mother.
Henry calls her ten times a day on her mobile phone.

February 5th 2007

It can take as long as ten million years for a star to form, but Henry doesn’t care about seeing his
star any more. He knows that although he may be the first person to see a new star, it is
impossible for him to see the birth of a star, from its beginning to its appearance. But he doesn’t
care because a new star has just entered his life.

“But we haven’t thought of a name!” says Anna, holding the tiny baby in her arms.
“I have” says Henry. “I’ve got a beautiful name for her.”
“What is it?”
“Stella. Let’s call her Stella.”

Elephants, Bananas and Aunty Ethel

by Chris Rose

So, I was walking along the street, on my way to work, as usual, but for some reason I was in a
hurry. I wasn’t really sure why I was in a hurry. And then I realised that I was holding a banana
in my hand. I didn’t know why I was holding a banana in my hand, but I knew that the banana
was really important for some reason. The banana had something to do with the reason that I was
late, and in a hurry. It was a really important banana, only I didn’t know why the banana was so
important. Then I met my Aunty Ethel on the street corner. It was strange, because I hadn’t seen
Aunty Ethel for about twenty years.
“Hello! I said to her. “I haven’t seen you for about twenty years!”
I was really surprised to see her, but she didn’t seem surprised to see me.
“Be careful with that banana!” she said. And I laughed, because I knew that it was a really
important banana, and yes, I had to be careful with it. Aunty Ethel decided to walk to work with
me, which was a problem because I was late and in a hurry, and she walked really, really slowly.
Then, when we went round the corner, there was an elephant blocking the street. It depends
where you live, I guess, but in Manchester it’s pretty strange to see an elephant blocking the
street. The strange thing was, though, that I wasn’t really that surprised. ”Oh no!” I was thinking,
“Another elephant blocking the street…what a pain! Especially this morning when I’m late and
in a hurry, and with Aunty Ethel, and this really important banana…” Then I started to get really
worried, and then…I woke up.

I breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness for that” I thought. How strange dreams are…I
wonder why I was dreaming about elephants and bananas and Aunty Ethel. The radio was
already on. The radio comes on automatically at 7 o’clock, to wake me up. I looked at the clock.
It was already ten past seven. I had to get up quickly. I went into the shower, and I could hear the
news on the radio. I couldn’t hear it very well, but there was a story on the news about an
elephant who had escaped from a local circus. The elephant was causing a lot of trouble walking
around the town. I thought this was an incredible coincidence, but then I realised that I had
probably heard the news story on the radio when I was half-asleep. That was why I was
dreaming about an elephant. I quickly got dressed and went into the kitchen to get some coffee
before I went to work. I work for a film company. We get ideas for films and filmscripts, then we
try to produce the films. I thought a film about an elephant in Manchester would be great.
There was a note on the kitchen table. It was from my wife. “Don’t forget to buy bananas on
your way home from work today!!!” it said. It was a good job she had written the note, because I
had completely forgotten about the fact that she has to eat a lot of bananas because of the crazy
diet she’s on at the moment. I tried to remember to buy bananas on my way home from work,
and rushed out of the house. As I was walking down the road my mobile rang. It was my mum.
“Hello mum!” I said. “What are you ringing at this time for?”
“I’ve got some sad news, I’m afraid, love” she said. “Do you remember your Aunty Ethel?”
“Just about” I said, “But I haven’t seen Aunty Ethel for about twenty years"
“Yes, well she was very old…and I’m afraid she died last night. She’d been very ill…I told you
a couple of weeks ago…”
“That’s sad” I said.

So there I was, walking down the street, late for work, thinking about Aunty Ethel and bananas
and elephants, and of course I realised that it was all exactly the same as my dream. And as I
started to think more about this, I realised I was walking more and more slowly, and I looked
down and saw that the street was turning into hot, wet, sticky toffee, and it was sticking to my
shoes, and the quicker I tried to walk, the slower I went. I looked at my watch and saw that my
watch was going backwards. “That’s ok” I was thinking. “If my watch is going backwards, then
it means that it’s early, and not late, so I’m not late for work at all…” and then I woke up. Again.

Now this was strange. This was very, very strange. I got up and pinched myself to make sure I
was really awake this time. “Ouch!” The pinch hurt. This meant I really was awake, and not
dreaming this time. It was early. I wasn’t late. The radio alarm clock hadn’t come on yet. It was
only half past six. My wife was still at home.
“Have you got enough bananas?” I asked her. She looked at me as if I was crazy.
“What do you mean ‘bananas’”? she asked.
“I thought you had to eat lots of bananas for your special diet…”
“I have no idea what you’re on about!” she said. “Why, do you think I need to go on a diet? Do
you mean that I’m fat?”
“No, no, no…not at all…by the way…have you heard anything about an elephant?”
“An elephant?”
“Yes, an elephant which has escaped from a circus…”
“We live in Manchester. There aren’t any circuses in Manchester. And there certainly aren’t any
elephants. Listen, are you suffering from stress or something? You’re working too hard on that
new film you’re trying to produce, aren’t you? Perhaps you should just stay at home today, take
it easy…”
“Perhaps you’re right” I said. “I’ll just phone my mum..”
“Why do you need to phone your mum at half past six in the morning?”
“Oh…nothing important…” I said.
“Well, I’m off to work. See you later, and take it easy today, ok?”
“OK!”

I phoned my mum.
“Hello mum!”
“Hello love. What are you calling this early for?”
“Do you remember Aunty Ethel?”
“Of course I do…but I haven’t seen her for about twenty years or so…”
“How is she?”
“I’ve got no idea. Why on earth are you worried about your Aunty Ethel who you haven’t seen
for twenty years?”
“Oh nothing…bye!”

I made a cup of tea and went back to bed. Perhaps my wife was right. Perhaps I should just relax
and take it easy today. I phoned up my boss.
“Listen” I said. “I’m not feeling too good today…perhaps too much stress with the production
schedule of the new film project…”
“That’s a shame” said my boss. “We’ve just got a really exciting new idea for a film…I wanted
to talk to you about it today. It’s a kind of action movie. It’s a great story. You have to hear this –
an elephant escapes from a circus in a big city, and it has eaten some strange, radioactive
bananas, so it’s going completely crazy. They eventually manage to stop the elephant by
covering all the streets with sticky toffee, so that it can’t walk!”
“I see” I said. “And where does my Aunty Ethel come into it?”
“Aunty who?”

I hung up the phone, and hoped that I would wake up. Soon.

The novels of J.M. Coetzee

 
Dusklands

The novel actually consists of two separate stories. The first one, The Vietnam Project, relates
the gradual descent into insanity of its protagonist Eugene Dawn. Eugene works for a U.S.
government agency responsible for the psychological warfare in the Vietnam War. However, his
work on mythography and psychological operations is taking a heavy toll on him; his fall
culminates in him stabbing his own son, Martin.

The second story, The Narrative of Jacobus Coetzee, which takes place in the 18th century, is an
account of a hunting expedition into the then unexplored interior of South Africa. After crossing
the Orange River, Jacobus meets with a Namaqua tribe to trade, but suddenly falls ill. He is
attended to by the tribe and gradually recovers, only to get into a fight for which he is expelled
from the village. His last slave dying on the way home, he returns alone and later organizes a
punitive expedition against the Namaqua. The narrative concludes with his execution of the
slaves that deserted him on the previous journey and the massacre of the tribe.

In the Heart of the Country

In the Heart of the Country (1977) is a novel which delves into the the complex relationships that
form between the colonizer and the colonized. It takes place on a desolate farm in South Africa
told through the perspective of an intellegent yet meek European woman. She clashes with her
father when he takes an African mistress causing a rift that leads towards vengance, violence and
a muddling of her own relationship with the Africans.

Waiting for the Barbarians

The story is set in a small frontier town of a nameless empire. The town's magistrate is the story's
main protagonist and narrator. His rather peaceful existence on the frontier comes to an end with
the arrival of some special forces of the Empire, led by a sinister Colonel Joll. There are rumours
that the barbarians are preparing an attack on the Empire. That is why Colonel Joll and his men
conduct an expedition into the land beyond the frontier. They capture a number of "barbarians",
bring them back to town, torture them, kill some of them, and leave for the Empire's capital in
order to prepare a larger campaign against the barbarians. In the meantime, the Magistrate
becomes involved with a "barbarian girl" who was left behind crippled and blinded by the
torturers. Eventually, he decides to take her back to her people. After a life-threatening trip
through the barren land, he returns to his village. Shortly thereafter, the Empire's forces return
and the Magistrate's own plight begins.

Life and Times of Michael K

After her death, she is cremated and the ashes given to him. He vows to return them to her
birthplace. He begins a long, ardous journey across the country to her childhood farm, sleeping
rough and enduring many hardships along the way. The country is at war, and he sees many
convoys going past. One of the soldiers ransacks his belongings and takes his money.

Eventually he reaches the place of his destination and finds the place deserted, the owners long
gone. He scatters the ashes on the ground and takes up residence there. He kills goats and birds
for food and drinks from the nearby dam. A member of the old family comes and wanting to
escape the war, hides in the farmhouse.

Foe

"Returning from Bahia, where she has been searching for a lost daughter, Susan Barton is put off
the ship after a mutiny; she is accompanied only by the dead body of the captain, whose mistress
she had been. She swims ashore and finds herself on the island with Cruso and Friday. Friday
has been mutilated: he has no tongue. Who did this, where or how it happened, we are never told.
After their rescue by a passing merchantman, Cruso dies aboard the ship and Susan and Friday
are left to make their way to England. After she arrives in England, Susan drafts a memoir, "The
Female Castaway" and seeks out the author, Foe, to have her story told. Coetzee's novel
comprises four parts: beginning with Susan's memoir, it continues with a series of letters
addressed to Foe, letters that do not reach him because he is hiding, trying to evade his creditors.
The novel proceeds to an account of Susan's relationship with Foe and her struggle to retain
control over the story and its meaning; it ends with a sequence spoken by an unnamed narrator
(possibly standing for Coetzee himself) who revises the story as we know it and dissolves the
narration in an act of authorial renunciation." (from D. Attwell "J.M.Coetzee. South Africa and
the Politics of Writing" University of California Press)
Age of Iron

The novel depicts the agony of Mrs. Curren, a classically educated white woman. She lives in the
Cape Town of the apartheid era, where she is slowly dying of cancer. Against a backdrop of
violence by whites and blacks alike, Mrs. Curren remembers her past and her daughter, who left
South Africa because of the situation in the country: the book is framed as an extended letter
from the mother to her distant offspring. As the story progresses, she constructs a relationship of
a different kind with Vercueil, an old black man who happens upon her home.

Coetzee brings together important themes in this book: the drama of a tragic end of life, the
separation of mother and daughter, a strange friendship between diametrically opposed people,
and the metaphor of decay from within — atop which is painted a picture of social and political
tragedy unfolding in an undeveloped country.

Disgrace

The novel tells the story of David Lurie, a professor of Romantic literature at a technical
university in Cape Town, South Africa, twice-divorced and unsatisfied with his job. The disgrace
comes when he has an affair with one of his students and is dismissed from his teaching position,
after which he takes refuge on his daughter's farm in the Eastern Cape. Shortly after becoming
comfortable with rural life, he is forced to come to terms with the aftermath of an attack on the
farm in which his daughter is raped and he is brutally assaulted.

Elizabeth Costello

In this novel, Elizabeth Costello, an aging Australian writer, travels around the world and gives
lectures on topics including the lives of animals and literary censorship. In her youth, Costello
wrote The House on Eccles Street, a novel that re-tells James Joyce's Ulysses from the
perspective of his wife, Molly Bloom. Costello, becoming weary from old age, confronts her
fame, which seems farther and farther removed from who she has become, and struggles with
issues of belief, vegetarianism, sexuality, language, and evil.

Slow Man

Slow Man tells the story of Paul Rayment, a man who loses part of a leg after a car accident. He
becomes a wallflower, but one attracted to his Croatian nurse. It is obvious that they could never
come together, and their interactions become awkward.

It is not until the famed author Elizabeth Costello – the eponymous heroine of Coetzee's 2003
novel Elizabeth Costello – finds her way into Paul's life that he is able to become a stronger and
fuller person.

On a deeper and more meaningful level the book is a discourse on the inter-relationship between
the literary author and the characters, and with reality.
These texts come from Wikipedia.
Wikipedia:Text of the GNU Free Documentation License

The British Council is not responsible for the content of external websites

The Golden Boys

by Chris Rose

Every August. Every August for twelve years. Every August for twelve years we went to the
same small town on holiday. Every August for twelve years we went to the same beach. Every
August for twelve years my parents rented the same small house in the same small town near the
same beach, so every morning of every August for twelve years I woke up and walked down to
the same beach and sat under the same umbrella or on the same towel in front of the same sea.

There was a small café on the beach where we sat every day, and everyday Mr Morelli in the
café said “Good morning!” to my parents, and then always patted me on the head like a dog.
Every day we walked down to our red and white umbrella, every day my father sat on his
deckchair and read the newspaper then went to sleep, every day my mother went for a swim in
the sea and then went to sleep. Every lunchtime we ate the same cheese sandwiches which my
mother made, and then every afternoon we went up to the café and ate an ice cream while my
parents talked to Mr Morelli about the weather. Every summer for twelve years I sat there and
read books and sometimes played volleyball with some of the other boys and girls who were
there, but I never made any friends.

It was so boring.

Every August for twelve years the same family sat next to us. They were called the Hamiltons.
We had a red and white umbrella, they had a green one. Every morning my parents said “Good
morning!” to Mr and Mrs Hamilton, and Mr and Mrs Hamilton said “Good morning!” to my
parents. Sometimes they talked about the weather.

Mr and Mrs Hamilton had two sons. Richard was the same age as me, and his brother Philip was
two years older than me. Richard and Philip were both taller than me. Richard and Philip were
very friendly, and both very handsome. They were much friendlier and more handsome than me.
They made friends with everyone, and organised the games of volleyball on the beach or
swimming races in the sea with the other children. They always won the games of volleyball and
the swimming races. My parents liked Richard and Philip a lot. “Why can’t you be more like
Richard and Philip?” they said to me. “Look at them! They make friends with everyone! They
are polite, good boys! You just sit here reading books and doing nothing!”

I, of course, hated them.

Richard and Philip, Richard and Philip, Richard and Philip – it was all I ever heard from my
parents every August for twelve years. Richard and Philip were perfect. Everything about them
was better than anything about me. Even their green beach umbrella was better than our red and
white one.

I was sixteen years old the last summer we went there. Perfect Richard and perfect Philip came
to the beach one day and said that they were going to have a barbecue at lunchtime. They were
going to cook for everyone! “Forget your cheese sandwiches”, they laughed, “Come and have
some hamburgers or barbecue chicken with us! We’re going to cook!”

My parents, of course, thought this was wonderful. “Look at how good Richard and Philip are!
They’re going to do a barbecue and they’ve invited everybody! You couldn’t organise a
barbecue!”

Every summer for twelve years, on the other side of my family, sat Mrs Moffat. Mrs Moffat was
a very large woman who came to the same beach every summer for twelve years on her own.
Nobody knew if she had a husband or a family, but my parents said that she was very rich. Mrs
Moffat always came to the beach wearing a large hat, a pair of sunglasses and a gold necklace.
She always carried a big bag with her. She never went swimming, but sat under her umbrella
reading magazines until lunchtime when she went home.

Richard and Philip, of course, also invited Mrs Moffat to their barbecue.

Richard and Philip’s barbecue was, of course, a great success. About twenty people came and
Richard and Philip cooked lots of hamburgers and chicken and made a big salad and brought big
pieces of watermelon and everyone laughed and joked and told Mr and Mrs Hamilton how
wonderful their sons were. I ate one hamburger and didn’t talk to anybody. After a while, I left,
and made sure that nobody saw me leave.

Mrs Moffat ate three plates of chicken and two hamburgers. After that she said she was very
tired and was going to go and have a sleep. She walked over to her umbrella and sat down on her
deckchair and went to sleep. When she woke up later, everybody on the beach was surprised to
hear her screaming and shouting.

“My bag!!!! My bag!!!” she shouted. “It’s gone!!! It’s GONE!!!” Everybody on the beach ran
over to Mrs Moffat to see what the problem was. “Someone has taken my bag!!!” she screamed,
“Someone has stolen my bag!!!”

“Impossible!” said everybody else. “This is a very safe, friendly beach! There are no thieves
here!” But it was true. Mrs Moffat’s big bag wasn’t there anymore.

Nobody had seen any strangers on the beach during the barbecue, so they thought that Mrs
Moffat had perhaps taken her bag somewhere and forgotten it. Mr Morelli from the café
organised a search of the beach. Everybody looked everywhere for Mrs Moffat’s big bag.

Eventually, they found it. My father saw it hidden in the sand under a deckchair. A green
deckchair. Richard and Philip’s deckchair. My father took it and gave it back to Mrs Moffat.
Everybody looked at Richard and Philip. Richard and Philip, the golden boys, stood there
looking surprised. Of course, they didn’t know what to say.

Mrs Moffat looked in her bag. She started screaming again. Her purse with her money in it
wasn’t in the big bag. “My purse!” she shouted, “My purse has gone! Those boys have stolen it!
They organised a barbecue so they could steal my purse!”

Everybody tried to explain to Mrs Moffat that this couldn’t possibly be true, but Mrs Moffat
called the police. The police arrived and asked golden Richard and golden Philip lots of
questions. Richard and Philip couldn’t answer the questions. Eventually, they all got into a police
car and drove away to the police station.

I sat there, pretending to read my book and trying to hide a big, fat purse under the sand on the
beach.

That was the last summer we went to the beach. My parents never talked about Richard and
Philip again.

THE END

The Dinosaur in Jake’s Garage

by Chris Rose

“Dad” he said, “There’s a dinosaur living in the garage.”

“Is there really, Jake?” said his dad. “That’s interesting. Now go and away and play. Daddy’s
busy at the moment.” Jake’s dad went back to reading his newspaper.

Jake had suspected that there was a dinosaur in the garage for some time. A few weeks ago,
behind the old bicycle he used to ride when he was small, the big bag with the tent in it that they
had only used once on a camping holiday before his dad had said “Forget this! I’m never going
camping again! Next year we’re staying in a hotel like ordinary people!”, a punctured football
and a big brown cardboard box containing pieces of a wardrobe which they had bought from a
big furniture store and which his dad had never been able to put together, Jake had found an
enormous egg. At first, Jake thought that it was perhaps another punctured football, one that had
gone a strange shape because it hadn’t been used for so long, but he didn’t recognise it, and when
he went to touch it, the thing was all hard, not like a football at all, punctured or not. It felt more
like a kind of egg, but it was all slippy and shiny, and he couldn’t see a hole in it anywhere. No,
Jake – being a clever boy – immediately realised that it wasn’t a football at all. It was an egg. He
didn’t tell anyone at the time, partly because he thought that his mum and dad would think that
he was lying again (his mum and dad always thought that he was lying. “Telling tales” they
called it. “Jake’s been telling tales again” they always sighed. “He always does it! He’s such a
clever boy. He has such a great imagination...but...one day his imagination is going to get him
into trouble!!!”), and also because he didn’t want anyone else to know about what he had found.
Because Jake already knew that he had found a dinosaur egg. Right there. Right in his garage!
They had been studying dinosaurs at school. Their teacher had told them all about dinosaurs, and
how dinosaurs came out of eggs, like birds or lizards do today, but that a dinosaur egg was as big
as a football, or even bigger.

The next day he decided to tell his teacher. “I’ve got a dinosaur living in my garage!” Jake said
proudly to his teacher. But the teacher didn’t listen to him. He only pushed his glasses up his big
nose and said, “Is that right Jake? How interesting...”

For the next few days Jake decided not to tell anyone about his dinosaur, but kept his secret to
himself. He started to feed the dinosaur at first by giving it some milk. Then he gave it some of
their dog’s food. The dog barked at Jake angrily when Jake took his food away from him.
“Don’t worry!” Jake said to the dog. “It’s just for the dinosaur in the garage. He’s getting bigger
every day! Soon you’ll be able to play with him!” The dog didn’t look convinced.

But it was true. The dinosaur was growing and growing. It was already as big as the dog. Jake
couldn’t contain his excitement, and the next day he told his teacher again, as his father still
wasn’t interested in the dinosaur.
“The dinosaur in my garage is getting bigger every day!” shouted Jake in the middle of the
lesson. The teacher turned round and looked at Jake with a serious expression.
“Well Jake, if there really is a dinosaur living in your garage, why don’t you take it out for a
walk? Why don’t you bring it into school tomorrow for us all to have look at???!!!” The teacher
laughed. He was feeling very pleased with himself. He pushed his glasses back up his big nose,
and looked at the rest of the class. “Don’t you think Jake should bring his pet dinosaur in for
everyone to see tomorrow?” he laughed, and all of the rest of the class laughed too.

The next day, Jake brought the dinosaur into school. It wasn’t easy, because the dinosaur hadn’t
been out of his garage before, and moreover, it was now really rather big, but Jake very carefully
took the lead they had for their dog, put it around the dinosaur’s neck and pulled him out of the
garage. Once out of the garage, however, the dinosaur sat down and refused to move any further.
Jake pulled and pulled but it was no good, he couldn’t move the dinosaur.

At first the dinosaur didn’t want to move. Jake put some meat from the fridge on the floor for the
dinosaur to eat. Now the dinosaur followed him out of the house, along the street and to the bus
stop. Quite a few people seemed surprised, and some of them were even scared when Jake got on
the bus with his dinosaur, but the dinosaur seemed quite happy. At one point there was a difficult
moment when the dinosaur put his nose into an old lady’s shopping bag and stole a chicken out
of it. The old lady screamed, and the ticket inspector came.

“Oi!” said the ticket inspector. “Has that thing got a ticket?” Jake showed the ticket inspector the
bus ticket which he had bought for the dinosaur, and then the ticket inspector went away, but the
old lady was still very unhappy, so Jake had to apologise for the chicken his dinosaur had stolen,
and then got off the bus at the next stop. He had to walk all the rest of the way to his school, and
when he got there he was late.

Everyone screamed when he walked into his classroom. Jake couldn’t understand why. His
teacher was staring at him in horror. Actually, no, his teacher wasn’t staring at Jake in horror, he
was staring at the dinosaur in horror. Jake couldn’t understand what the problem was.
“But, sir” he said to his teacher, “You told me to bring the dinosaur to school!!!”

Less than one hour later Jake was sitting on his own in the school, only Jake and his dinosaur.
There was a lot of noise outside. There was lots and lots of noise outside. Jake could hear the
sirens of police cars, people shouting, and the sound of helicopters flying overhead. He looked
out of the window of his classroom and waved at all the men with television cameras filming
him and his dinosaur.

His teacher had shouted “Out!! OUT!!! Everybody out!!!” when Jake had come in with his
dinosaur, and sure enough, the teacher and all the other children had run out of the classroom,
leaving Jake on his own with his dinosaur. Jake couldn’t understand why everybody was so
afraid of his dinosaur. He thought his dinosaur was pretty friendly.
“Jake!” shouted one of the police officers outside, “Can you hear me? Let us know if you’re ok!”
Jake smiled and waved at the police officers.
“I’m fine!” he shouted. The dinosaur sat in the classroom and started to eat some of the
children’s schoolbooks. Jake could see that it was getting bored. He took the dog’s lead and put
it on the dinosaur again, and took the dinosaur out of the classroom into the schoolyard, where
all the people were.

As soon as they went outside, there were screams and cries and the flashes from hundreds of
cameras. A policeman grabbed Jake and a huge net fell down on the dinosaur. A group of
scientists grabbed the dinosaur in the net, put him in a big truck and drove off.
“Wait!” shouted Jake. “Where are they going with my dinosaur?”
“They’re taking him to the zoo” said a policeman. “He’ll be safe there.”

Jake felt pretty sad when he got home. He didn’t even care that he was on the television news,
and his picture was on the front page of newspapers all across the world. He missed his dinosaur.
When everyone had gone to bed that night, he went out to the garage again, and found another
egg...

THE END

The Stonecutter
Once upon a time there was a stone cutter. The stone cutter lived in a land where a life of
privilege meant being powerful. Looking at his life he decided that he was unsatisfied with the
way things were and so he set out to become the most powerful thing in the land.

Looking around his land he wondered to himself what is it to be powerful. Looking up he saw
the Sun shining down on all the land. "The Sun must be the most powerful thing that there is, for
it shines down on all things, and all things grow from it's touch." So he became the Sun.

Days later, as he shone his power down on the inhabitants of the land, there came a cloud which
passed beneath him obstructing his brilliance. Frustrated he realized that the Sun was not the
most powerful thing in the land, if a simple cloud could interrupt his greatness. So he became a
cloud, in fact, he became the most powerful storm that the world had ever seen.

And so he blew his rain and lightning, and resounded with thunder all over the land,
demonstrating that he was the most powerful. Until one day he came across a boulder.

Down and down he poured and his thunder roared, lightning flashed and filled the sky, striking
the ground near the boulder. His winds blew and blew and blew, and yet, despite all his efforts,
he could not budge the boulder.

Frustrated again, he realized that the storm was not the most powerful thing in the land, rather it
must be the boulder. So he became the boulder.

For days he sat, unmovable, and impassive, demonstrating his power, until one day, a stone
cutter came and chiseled him to bits.

The Moral of the Story

Sometimes the most important thing to remember is that you have everything you need already,
right inside of you. Power is an illusion.

Two peas in a pod

by Chris Rose

They even dressed us the same. My mother said that it was easier for her just to buy two of
everything. Sometimes it was the same clothes but in different colours – a red top for me, and a
yellow one for my sister, for example. When they did that we swapped the clothes so that they
still couldn’t tell us apart. Not even our parents could tell us apart. Our schoolteachers never
could.

And then there were our names. It was crazy - they called us Edie and Evie! Even our names
were almost identical.

Two peas in a pod, they called us. Two drops of water.

Sometimes we couldn’t hardly tell ourselves from each other. At least when we were small. But
as we grew up things began to change.

Everybody thinks identical twins are, well, identical. But if you’re a twin you’ll know that it’s
not true. Physically, yes, we were almost identical. I say almost, because there was the
birthmark. My sister has a very small brown spot on her left shoulder. I don’t. This was the only
way we could ever be told apart.

But other than that, twins, even identical ones, are different inside. I think we started to change
when we started school. I was always very good. I never got into trouble, I always did all of my
homework and did very well in all the tests and exams. Evie wasn’t like that. Evie was always
getting into trouble. Evie never did her homework. Evie was a really bad student who never
studied and never learned anything. She would have failed her exams – but of course she didn’t.
Why? Well, it’s simple, isn’t it?

If you have an identical twin, how do you know which is which?

Evie, of course, started by copying my homework. Then she got worse. When there was a class
test she would write my name on her paper. When she got into trouble, she smiled beautifully at
the teacher and said “No, I’m Edie, I’m the good one, it was my twin sister Evie who was
naughty!”

They never took us seriously, we were only small children after all, there was no harm in being a
bit naughty. Everyone used to laugh. And because they never really knew who was who, neither
of us was ever punished for being naughty, and they never failed either of us in our exams,
because they couldn’t be sure which one to fail and which one to pass.

But as we got older, it got worse. Evie started to steal things. At first it was only things from
other children, sweets or pens or pencils or rubbers, the kind of things that sometimes happen in
school. But when we were 15, some money was taken from a teacher’s bag. It was quite a lot of
money, and the situation was serious. Then they found the money in Evie’s pocket. And what did
Evie do? Well, of course, she did the same thing she always did. “No, it wasn’t me. It was my
twin sister.” And I got into trouble, serious trouble this time. They called the police. They tried to
expel me from school. It was only when our parents came in and pleaded with the headteacher
that they agreed to drop the charges and say nothing about it. We were lucky that time.

But the trouble didn’t stop there. Evie was always playing truant, not going to school. Then when
she came in again, she accused me of lying. She said that she was Edie, and that I had given the
teachers the wrong name when they called the register. I thought about telling everyone about the
birthmark on her shoulder, that they should check the birthmark to make sure who was who. That
would solve the problem. I don’t know why I didn’t. Identical twins are always very close, and
even though I knew she was bad, I didn’t want to get her into trouble. Perhaps also because I
knew that trouble for her also meant trouble for me.

After we left school I began to worry more. I got a job working in an office. It wasn’t an
interesting job, but it was ok. I worked hard in the office, I did well and was going to get a
promotion. Evie, on the other hand, did nothing. She never got a job. She used to come and ask
me for money. She often disappeared for long periods of time. I didn’t know where she was. This
was bad, but it was worse when one day I looked at my passport, and found that I had Evie’s. I
didn’t know where she was, but obviously she had taken my passport to get there. Wherever she
was, and whatever she was doing , she was pretending to be me.

Eventually it happened. There was a loud knock on the door at six o’clock in the morning. There
were three policemen there. Two of them in uniforms, the other one a detective. I looked at their
serious faces and thought that they had come to tell me bad news. I thought they were coming to
tell me that my sister had died. But it wasn’t that. They asked me to come to the police station
with them. I understood that I couldn’t say no. They said that they didn’t want to arrest me just
yet, but that if I refused to help them, they would arrest me.

Of course, they asked to see my documents. I had to show them Evie’s passport, and tried to
explain that I wasn’t really Evie, but that my sister had taken my passport.

When I got to the police station Evie was there too. They had already arrested her – well, I say
“her”, but of course, they had arrested me. As far as the police were concerned, they had arrested
“Edie”. That’s what it said on her passport, and that’s who she said she was.

There was a long list of charges against her. Fraud and smuggling drugs. She told the police that
she was really Edie, and that I had changed the passports. Edie, me, who had a perfect alibi. Edie
hadn’t been to any other countries. She went to work everyday. It was Evie who the problem
was, she said.

The trial lasted for days, with even the judge and the lawyers getting continually confused about
who was who. Eventually, they convicted her. Ten years.

I still go to my job everyday. I’m still free. I never go to visit my sister in prison. I’m afraid that
she might show someone that she doesn’t have a birthmark on her left shoulder. Then someone
might look, and they will find that I do.

Quotes about the United Kingdom

First set of quotes

UAE - When young people say about the British that he's unpleasant or old, it is an impression
we have from the time when Great Britain was a great power together with Portugal.

ITALY - I particularly liked the spirit, the liveliness, the people and their open-mindedness.

HUNGARY - It's so fantastic that they are able to look at themselves with self-irony. I think this
is exceptional. They write books and make movies that tell a negative picture about them and
they show it.

HONG KONG - A lot of them are drunk and cause trouble.

JAPAN - There are bad points such as discrimination but also good points such as the
parliamentary government.

KENYA - It's believed that if you go for further education in Britain, you get quality education.

THAILAND - They seem so cold in general.

BANGLADESH - Heritage from Britain, technology and dynamism from the United States.

SINGAPORE - The British always give me the idea of old and boring.

KOREA - Underlying the British people's ideologies is their deeply rooted tradition, long
history, long history of the royal family and democracy, and the class structure.

GREECE - I am thinking about music. It's not by accident that the most innovative trends in
music come from England.

VIETNAM - UK is a small island but it has a global trading system.

Second set of quotes

MEXICO - The British are limited. They don't try new things.

JAPAN - British scientists are enthusiastic, almost manic, in particular categories. But they are
doing something that really doesn't matter.

CZECH REPUBLIC - Britain was the first country with a constitution, I think. So there is a
real democratic tradition in Britain.

SPAIN - Out of the European countries I think the closest to the US is England; but you can't
separate them from Europe.

SINGAPORE - They have a group of white trash, you know, skinheads. That group is very,
very racist. But I think the majority is fine. In fact, I know there are some community leaders that
are black.

FRANCE - There are many differences between the English, the Irish and the Scottish. Irish and
Scottish are much more friendly.

HUNGARY - Their mistrust with strangers is also a characteristic. Usually this is said for the
Germans but it is far more true for the English.

NIGERIA - A British product is very high quality. You'll use it and use it until you are tired.

RUSSIA - People are very involved in the life of society, politics. They are very well aware of
what is going on.

GERMANY - The really crazy people all come from England.

SAUDI ARABIA - They don't have any famous artists. They like soccer.

Uncle Tom's Cabin

by Harriet Beecher Stowe

Uncle Tom's Cabin, or Life Among the Lowly is an anti-slavery novel by American author
Harriet Beecher Stowe. Published in 1852, the novel had a profound effect on worldwide
attitudes toward African-Americans and slavery. In the United States, it is widely thought to
have helped intensify the sectional conflict that led to civil war.

Stowe, a Connecticut-born teacher at the Hartford Female Academy and an active abolitionist,
focused the novel on the character of Uncle Tom, a long-suffering Black slave around whose life
revolve the stories of other characters—both fellow slaves and slave owners.

Uncle Tom's Cabin was the best-selling novel, and the second best-selling book {following the
Bible}, of the 19th century and is credited with helping to fuel the abolitionist cause in the 1850s.
In the first year after it was published, 300,000 copies of the book were sold in the United States
alone. The book's impact was so great that when Abraham Lincoln met Stowe at the start of the
American Civil War, Lincoln is often quoted as having declared, "So this is the little lady who
made this big war."

The book also helped create a number of common stereotypes about Blacks, many of which
endure to this day. These include the affectionate, dark-skinned mammy; the piccaninny
stereotype of black children; and the Uncle Tom, or dutiful, long-suffering servant faithful to his
white master or mistress. In recent years, the negative associations with Uncle Tom's Cabin have,
to an extent, overshadowed the historical impact of the book as a "vital antislavery tool."

Uncle Tom's cabin

Plot summary

Eliza escapes with her son, Tom sold "down the river"

The book opens with a Kentucky farmer named Arthur Shelby facing the loss of his farm
because of debts. Even though he and his wife (Emily Shelby) believe that they have a
benevolent relationship with their slaves, Shelby decides to raise the needed funds by selling two
of them—Uncle Tom, a middle-aged man with a wife and children, and Harry, the son of Emily
Shelby’s maid Eliza—to a slave trader. Emily Shelby hates the idea of doing this because she
had promised her maid that her child would never be sold; Emily's son, George Shelby, hates to
see Tom go because he sees the old man as his friend and mentor.

When Eliza overhears Mr. and Mrs. Shelby discussing plans to sell Tom and Harry, Eliza
determines to run away with her son. The novel states that Eliza made this decision not because
of physical cruelty, but by her fear of losing her only surviving child (she had already lost two
children due to miscarriage). Eliza departs that night, leaving a note of apology to her mistress.

While all of this is happening, Uncle Tom is sold and placed on a riverboat, which sets sail down
the Mississippi River. While onboard, Tom meets and befriends a young white girl named Eva.
When Eva falls into the river, Tom saves her. In gratitude, Eva's father, Augustine St. Clare,
buys Tom from the slave trader and takes him with the family to their home in New Orleans.
During this time, Tom and Eva begin to relate to one another because of the deep Christian faith
they both share.

Eliza's family hunted, Tom's life with St. Clare

During Eliza's escape, she meets up with her husband George Harris, who ran away previously.
They decide to attempt to reach Canada. However, they are now being tracked by a slave hunter
named Tom Loker. Eventually Loker and his men trap Eliza and her family, causing George to
shoot Loker. Worried that Loker may die, Eliza convinces George to bring the slave hunter to a
nearby Quaker settlement for medical treatment.

Back in New Orleans, St. Clare debates slavery with his cousin Ophelia who, while opposing
slavery, is deeply prejudiced against Black people. St. Clare, however, believes he is not biased,
even though he is a slave owner. In an attempt to show Ophelia that her views on Blacks are
wrong, St. Clare purchases Topsy, a young black slave. St. Clare then asks Ophelia to educate
Topsy.

After Tom has lived with the St. Clares for two years, Eva grows very ill. Before she dies she
experiences a vision of heaven, which she shares with the people around her. As a result of her
death and vision, the other characters resolve to change their lives, with Ophelia promising to
love her slaves more, Topsy saying she will better herself, and St. Clare pledging to free Uncle
Tom.

Tom sold to Simon Legree

Before St. Clare can follow through on his pledge, he is fatally stabbed while intervening in a
fight. His wife reneges on her late husband's vow and sells Tom at auction to a vicious plantation
owner named Simon Legree. Legree (who is not a native southerner but a transplanted Yankee)
takes Tom to rural Louisiana, where Tom meets Legree's other slaves, including Emmeline
(whom Legree purchased at the same time). Legree begins to hate Tom when Tom refuses
Legree's order to whip his fellow slave. Tom receives a brutal beating, and Legree resolves to
crush Tom's faith in God. But Tom refuses to stop reading his Bible and comforting the other
slaves as best he can. While at the plantation, Tom meets Cassy, another of Legree's slaves.
Cassy was previously separated from her son and daughter when they were sold; unable to
endure the pain of seeing another child sold, she killed her third child.

At this point Tom Loker returns to the story. Loker has changed as the result of being healed by
the Quakers. George, Eliza, and Harry have also obtained their freedom after crossing into
Canada. In Louisiana, Uncle Tom almost succumbs to hopelessness as his faith in God is tested
by the hardships of the plantation. However, he has two visions—one of Jesus and one of Eva—
which renews his resolve to remain a faithful Christian, even unto death. He encourages Cassy to
escape, which she does, taking Emmeline with her. When Tom refuses to tell Legree where
Cassy and Emmeline have gone, Legree orders his overseers to kill Tom. As Tom is dying, he
forgives the overseers who savagely beat him. Humbled by the character of the man they have
killed, both men become Christians. After Tom's death, George Shelby (Arthur Shelby's son)
arrives to buy Tom’s freedom, but finds he is too late.

Final Section

On their boat ride to freedom, Cassy and Emmeline meet George Harris' sister and accompany
her to Canada. Once there Cassy discovers that Eliza is her long-lost daughter who was sold as a
child. Now that their family is together again, they travel to France and eventually Liberia, the
African nation created for former American slaves. There they meet Cassy's long-lost son.
George Shelby returns to the Kentucky farm and frees all his slaves. George tells them to
remember Tom's sacrifice and his belief in the true meaning of Christianity.

The broken mirror, the black cat, and lots of good luck
by Chris Rose

Nikos was an ordinary man. Nothing particularly good ever happened to him, nothing particularly bad ever
happened to him. He went through life accepting the mixture of good things and bad things that happen to
everyone. He never looked for any explanation or reason about why things happened just the way they
did.

One thing, however, that Nikos absolutely did not believe in was superstition. He had no time for
superstition, no time at all. Nikos thought himself to be a very rational man, a man who did not believe
that his good luck or bad luck was in any way changed by black cats, walking under ladders, spilling salt
or opening umbrellas inside the house.

Nikos spent much of his time in the small taverna near where he lived. In the taverna he sat drinking
coffee and talking to his friends. Sometimes his friends played dice or cards. Sometimes they played for
money. Some of them made bets on horse races or football matches. But Nikos never did. He didn’t know
much about sport, so he didn’t think he could predict the winners. And he absolutely didn’t believe in
chance or luck or superstition, like a lot of his friends did.

One morning Nikos woke up and walked into the bathroom. He started to shave, as he did every morning,
but as he was shaving he noticed that the mirror on the bathroom wall wasn’t quite straight. He tried to
move it to one side, to make it straighter, but as soon as he touched it, the mirror fell off the wall and hit
the floor with a huge crash. It broke into a thousand pieces. Nikos knew that some people thought this
was unlucky. “Seven years bad luck” they said, when a mirror broke. But Nikos wasn’t superstitious.
Nikos wasn’t superstitious at all. He didn’t care. He thought superstition was nonsense. He picked up the
pieces of the mirror, put them in the bin, and finished shaving without a mirror.

After that he went into the kitchen to make himself a sandwich to take to work for his lunch. He cut two
pieces of bread and put some cheese on them. Then he thought he needed some salt. When he picked
up the salt jar, it fell from his hand and broke on the floor. Salt was everywhere. Some people, he knew,
thought that this was also supposed to bring bad luck. But Nikos didn’t care. He didn’t believe in
superstitions.

He left the house and went to work. On his way to work he saw a black cat running away from him. He
didn’t care. He wasn’t superstitious. Some builders were working on a house on his street. There was a
ladder across the pavement. Nikos thought about walking around the ladder, but he didn’t care, he wasn’t
superstitious and didn’t believe in superstitions, so he walked right underneath the ladder.
Even though Nikos wasn’t superstitious, he thought that something bad was certain to happen to him
today. He had broken a mirror, spilled some salt, walked under a ladder and seen a black cat running
away from him. He told everybody at worked what had happened. “Something bad will happen to you
today!” they all said. But nothing bad happened to him.

That evening, as usual, he went to the taverna. He told all his friends in the taverna that he had broken a
mirror, spilled the salt, seen a black cat running away from him and then walked under a ladder. All his
friends in the taverna moved away from him. “Something bad will happen to him”, they all said, “and we
don’t want to be near him when it happens!”.

But nothing bad happened to Nikos all evening. He sat there, as normal, and everything was normal.
Nikos was waiting for something bad to happen to him. But it didn’t.

“Nikos, come and play cards with us!” joked one of his friends. “I’m sure to win!” Nikos didn’t usually play
cards, but tonight he decided to. His friend put a large amount of money on the table. His friend thought
Nikos was going to lose. Nikos thought he was going to lose.

But it didn’t happen like that.

Nikos won. Then he played another game, and he won that one too. Then somebody asked him to play a
game of dice, and Nikos won that as well. He won quite a lot of money. “Go on then Nikos” his friends
shouted, “Use all the money you have won to buy some lottery tickets!” Nikos spent all the money he had
won on lottery tickets. The draw for the lottery was the next day.

The next day after work Nikos went to the tavern again. Everybody was watching the draw for the lottery
on TV. The first number came out, for the third prize. It was Nikos’ number. Then the second number, for
the second prize. It was another of Nikos’ tickets. Then the first prize. It was Nikos’ number as well. He
won all three of the big lottery prizes.

It was incredible. It seemed that all the things that people thought caused bad luck actually brought him
good luck.

The next day Nikos bought a book about superstitions from all over the world. When he had read the
book he decided to do everything that would bring him bad luck. He left empty bottles on the table. He
asked his wife to cut his hair for him. He accepted a box of knives as a gift. He slept with his feet pointing
towards the door. He sat on the corners of tables. He put a candle in front of the mirror. He always left his
hat on the bed. He always left his wallet on the bed. He bought things in numbers of six, or thirteen. He
crossed people on the stairs. He got on a boat and whistled. And with everything he did, he got luckier
and luckier. He won the lottery again. He won the games of dice in the taverna every evening. The things
got crazier and crazier. He bought a black cat as a pet. He broke a few more mirrors, on purpose. He
didn’t look people in the eye when they raised their glasses to him. He put loaves of bread upside down
on the table. He spilled salt. He spilled olive oil. He spilled wine.

The more superstitious things he did, the luckier he became. He went in to the taverna and started to tell
all his friends what he thought.
“You see!” he told them. “I was right all along! Superstition is nonsense! The more things I do to break
ridiculous superstitions, the more lucky I am!”
“But Nikos” replied one of his friends, “Don’t you see that you are actually as superstitious as we are? You
are so careful to break superstitions, and this brings you luck. But you are only lucky when you do these
things. Your disbelief is actually a kind of belief!”
Nikos thought hard about what his friend said. He had to admit that it was true. He was so careful to break
all the superstitions he could, that in some way he was actually observing those superstitions.

The next day, he stopped spilling salt, chasing away black cats, walking under ladders, putting up
umbrellas in the house and breaking mirrors. He also stopped winning money on the lottery. He started to
lose at games of cards or dice.

He was a normal man again. Sometimes he was lucky, sometimes he wasn’t. He didn’t not believe in
superstitions any more, but he didn’t believe in them either.

“Nikos”, said his friend to him, “It was your belief in yourself that made you lucky. It was your self-
confidence that helped you, not superstitions.”

Nikos listened to his friend and thought that he was right. But, however rational he still believed himself to
be, he always wondered what would have happened if he hadn’t broken that mirror...