A WAYYARD THOUGHT NOW TAKING SHAPE

Racing out of the door to play is one of my earliest memories and the most consistent behavior I
remember. I was an active child, full of energy and determined to enjoy myself. I was pampered by
my parents but that did not simply imply that I was not scolded or punished when I was in the
wrong. Their love for me was a special kind of armor given that despite my activeness, I was an
introvert. I never felt isolated, and the liberty given to me meant I was open to explore my own
mind.

I was always involved in a lot of activities. Studies was not important, but I scored above average
after putting some amount of effort. Apart from that, from my early childhood till I reached puberty,
my days were filled with dancing, skating, swimming, basketball, writing lessons.

Puberty did not bring about a major change, apart from the fact that I was now more conscious of
the skirts I wore, and blood stains on the skirt that were difficult to hide. Studies became more
important at this stage when I ranked 1 st in my sixth class. The focus shifted from engaging in
physical activities to improve my class participation through improving my communication skills and
engagement with others.

The progress was however lost when I changed schools in ninth and the new place meant being lost
in a crowd of preexisting groups and its own hierarchy. For an introvert who had never experienced
a change in surroundings, it was difficult to cope. I tried but I faced my most depressive phase of life
at this point. A few mistakes followed by severe, widespread judgments meant I was jumping from
groups to groups and from friends to friends. Poetry opened a new world where I could express
myself without feeling that I was losing my way. Reading which until then was not any kind of special
hobby became an obsession and I spent my free time writing or devouring each book I could get my
hand on. I knew I was escaping a negative reality, but the new avenues that opened expanded my
horizons and built my interest in literature.

My own turmoil built my interest in psychology and English and so I chose PCB with Psychology in
my higher school. After spending two years with a new class, I was determined to pursue a career
built on my interest without too much focus on the practical feasibility of the choice.

With a good percentage, I got admitted to LSR, Delhi in English Literature and next three years were
spent delving into an infinite world where nothing was constant and each situation was a result of a
multifaceted reality comprising of personal motivations, social, economic and political environment
and ideologies that ranged from religion, to gender to class and race.

This was also the time I became a volunteer for an N.G.O that taught children from slum areas. I was
also part of a student initiated online content blog and held the position of responsibility as team
heads. My exposure to extracurricular activities expanded and literature was thus being shaped by a
bigger need of learning how to manage positions of responsibility.

After completing my undergrad, I got into the preparation for Civils Services Exam and M.B.A with
former as my main priority for one year. The period was filled with alternate phases of feeling
normal and feeling low from the lack of social interaction. After failing I realized that my skill set was
different from that required by UPSC, and my focus shifted to M.B.A. After a lot of hard work, I finally
arrived at XLRI, Delhi. The first day was the most memorable for being filled with hopes and anxiety
but the challenges meant a new road of learning which I looked forward to.

MUTLIPLE INTELLIGENCE TEST

During the session on Intelligence, we covered MIT and learned about 7 dimensions of intelligence:

I. Bodily/kinesthetic – 4/10
II. Interpersonal – 5/10
III. Intrapersonal – 8/10
IV. Logical – 7/10
V. Rhythmic/Musical – 9/10
VI. Verbal/Linguistic – 8/10
VII. Visual – 9/10
VIII. Scoring high on Intrapersonal, Rhythmic and Visual Intelligence Dimensions goes together
with my own personal experiences. Building my strength upon these intelligences requires
me not to focus on it being different from M.B.A but how M.B.A can build these intelligences
into a unique quality of mine.

ATTITUDE ANALYSIS

My own attitude analysis was based on how I would handle my surroundings. With my lack in
interpersonal and communication skills, I viewed my interaction negatively with me in a state of
inferior position. I gave away the control of frame to the assumed superior person and faced
bitterness towards him/her. While my attitude is positive when I self-assess myself on facing my
own struggles, the lack of compatibility between the above two means I may struggle when faced
with a majority different and gets a better incentives as compared to me. I learned that I need to
become appreciative of my own abilities, especially those which set me apart from others.

MBTI TEST

Personality type is ENFJ

Scores on MBTI:

Extroverted (E) Vs. Sensing (S) Vs. Thinking (T) Vs. Judging (J) Vs.
Introverted (I) Intuitive (N) Feeling (F) Perceptive (P)
6 4 4 16 9 11 12 8

Most Attractive Occupations Career Trends Potential Strengths

Religiously Oriented Many of these occupations Can get things organised

Occupations reflect and interest in helping
Home Economist others with their emotional, Ability to develop human
intellectual, or spiritual resources
Optometrist development; 7 of the top 20 Skilled at building consensus
Musician or Composer are religiously oriented People Skills
Counsellor occupations. There are also Energy and enthusiasm
several positions in the arts.
Artist or Entertainer
Physician: Family, General
Practice
Designer
Child Care Worker
Dental hygienist
VALUE SYSTEM FROM EXERCISE ‘THE GIRL AND THE SAILOR’
Ordered in arrangement of 1-5 ranks:

Girl

Fiancé

Sailor

Old Man

Friend

The most important values that I determined from the exercise in the order of importance are:

1. Actor (a person who does not wait for things to happen but takes an action to achieve it)
2. Determined (a person who focuses on her goals and is strong willed to pursue them no
matter the barriers)
3. Flexibility (a person who is open minded to consider each outlook and makes decision based
on a holistic understanding of her own and others’ perspectives)
4. Integrity – (not differentiating between situation based on a power hierarchy)
5. Humanity – (helping others by taking an active role in it without being indifferent or
prejudiced)
6. Loyalty – (not shifting stances for different people and in different scenarios based on your
own benefits analysis)

MOTIVATIONAL STORY

Before I had started the preparation process for M.B.A., the governing thought in my mind was to
find a way to secure stability in my life. M.B.A. seemed the most practical choice to build a
foundation on which I can pursue my goal of having my own business.

The preparation for CAT and XAT began in June, and despite less than six months for preparation, I
was confident that I would be fine with the exams due to a good academic track record. Quantitative
ability proved to my most difficult subject, then and now, and a lack of improvement in it left me
with the belief that I may not be able to crack the competitive exams.

My time from November to January end was spent in worrying excessively whether I was making the
right choice in pursuing M.B.A.

When the results started coming out and I got 95 percentile in XAT, I was excessively happy and
doubtful at the same time. That doubt, I believe stemmed from my own consciousness of not being
from an Engineering or Commerce background and feeling inferior to my many competitors. That
doubt must have also shown during my interview process for XLRI.

Not getting through to Jamshedpur was a setback, and even though I had an alternative, my own
belief that I deserved the best kept me from feeling satisfied about the outcome. Thus when I got
through for XLRI, Delhi, I accepted the chance with the utmost belief that I there will be many
opportunities to make use of and redefine myself.

Induction week exposed me to the level of competition and that I always have to be on my toes.
Balancing academics with the SIP process was too challenging at times, and more than once I felt like
giving up. Talking to my parents and seniors helped me on focussing on the bigger picture without
getting lost in the details and that making mistakes is okay than ruining your health over stress.
As I near the end term, my emotions are in constant fluctuation of self-depreciation and optimism
that everything will turn out for the best. Yet, what keeps me going is my own desire to prove myself
to me and others and to be a person capable enough to stand through any kind of storm.

I look forward to the time when I can balance my schedule without feeling overburdened and
mentally relaxing a bit so that I can also enjoy what I am working towards, than just be driven to it by
a sense of being left behind.

As I get more exposed to what management means, I get more interested in it and look forward to
becoming a leader that can put to test her skills and intelligence to a place which fits me best.

• McClelland’s Theory of Needs can be applied to understand my current level of needs. My

need for achievement and need for power at the present is strongest because of my own sense of
inferiority and self-consciousness, which I believe I can only overcome when I have achieved
something tangible and that which is visible to others.

• Victor Vroom’s Self-Efficacy Theory and Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs would be theories
under which I would work to remain motivated and come out as a winner. I need to believe that I
can perform either through learning, arousal, or observation and that I can put those learnings to
actualize my potential without being lost in the crowd

EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE TEST

I scored 225 out of 250.

I found out that I am amongst the average people in scores. I learned that I am an empathetic
person, but I sometimes fall less while handling the emotions of others. This tends to happen
because I try to solve the situation more practically. I also learned that while temperament cannot
change, mood is how one adjusts with a situation. I find that my mood swings happen more when I
feel I have less control over the situation.

MY VISION AND EPITAPH FOR LIFE

No matter through which means, my vision has always been to become a leader that can help in the
upliftment of the unprivileged people. Whether through small or large means, I want to become a
facilitator for people to achieve their dreams. The origin and force for the vision is simple, I want to
see the genuine smile on the faces of as many people as possible.

When I am no longer in this world, I do not want to remembered forever, but I want the people
whom I loved to remember as someone who cared and was there with them.

“In loving memory of Maanvi Agarwal,

A daughter, a friend, a teacher

One unlike we will ever meet again in this lifetime”

The Reality of my Behaviors

The ongoing discussions and learnings from the classroom and group discussions has compelled my
mind to go over and over my own outlook, my behaviors and attitudes and the way I view them
through the lens of other’s. I have also tried to analyze the attitude of others individually and in the
bigger context of my fellow classmates and me being the first batch of a new college on a virtual
platform for the time being.
While we went over many concepts of cognition, intelligence, attitude, perception, learnings, values,
and emotions, I also saw the real-life impact and understanding of these concepts by different
people.

The focus of most people has been on how to integrate the concepts into their cumulative
projection of an M.B.A life but all the above concepts are important for an individual irrespective of
his/her background or goals in life W have to align our behaviors with what we believe will help us
beyond the one aspect life that is M.B.A.

The importance of soft skills becomes somewhat clouded in a technical field, but they create
foundation for a long term, happy and actualized life. I have tried to stay outside of the stereotypical
mold created by society, but it is more than that. It is about being like others but unique in one’s
own individuality. The strongest attitude I have witnessed through the discussion so far is the neglect
towards an introspective behavior. We are constantly in a rush to compare ourselves to the
touchtone established by our peers. We care about money, about numbers and measurable figures
but that all is coalesced into the frame of what an ideal management student should be like. The
result is that we are forcing ourselves to run in a race that was not meant for us.

I have found myself repeatedly fighting against the engineers and the commerce students of my
class, of other M.B.A colleges. I have felt defeated against imaginative forces that have pushed me
down because I was different. My behavior reflects my own wrong learning that there can only be a
specific criterion for a management student. I have let my own emotions cloud my view and instead
of being proactive, I have tired to set up defenses against the anxiety by putting myself down.

The analysis so far about my own self is negative, but I learned that once you hit rock bottom is
when you can climb. My own movement from being less of an emotional and more of a practical
person is based on a conscious choice to feel more in control of my choices. I have always taken
things as they came and this is the way I like to do things, but certain decisions require planning and
thinking and as I learn to structure this behavior, I face many challenges.

 One of the biggest challenges is to feel confident in myself, which has been difficult to do. I
repeatedly fall back to the same narrative that I do not belong amongst my peers. The best
way to unlearn this has been to view myself from the eyes of others and more experienced
people who know me well. Their opinion on me and my qualities is based on their
experiences in life thus while me and the rest of my classmates look at ourselves from a
narrow window limited to our group, they see it in a broader perspective from the point of
view of an employer and an organizational worker.
While I have developed more confidence myself than before, it is still a long road which I am
confident I will reach someday.
 The next step is to determine what I like and want from my choices. I am not a very
competitive person and I like a climate which promotes horizontal work environment and
flexibility in work, approach, and results. I do not want to be part of the grind of a
multinational company, but I want to be part of a more rooted company with its own
creative goals. Freedom of movement and time is very important to me because I do not
want to be defined by my work which is not part of my personal life.
This realization already puts me out of the race that my fellows are a part of which is fine,
but the challenges come when my choices are deemed as weak. Competition is not just
about the career we choose but how we approach it and depends on compatibility of my
skills with that of the work I am choosing.
 Though I try to change by behavior by believing in own self, I get bogged down by the fear of
missing out and start putting my energy in areas which I am neither good at nor interested. I
am getting over this problem by improving my own clarity of thought and of what I want.
 After changing my perception toward myself, the important part is figure out my strengths
and weaknesses and use the opportunities given to me to create a more rounded
personality for myself. Strengths needs to be polished and weaknesses needs to be worked
out. My peers have different talents, and I can learn a lot from them and give. The challenge
I face though is in approach. Due to my own high esteem and hesitation in working with
others, I often fail to take help from others, but I have been trying to change myself.
Determination to improve myself has and be a better version has helped me get over my
doubts and approach others. I take criticism well and am honest with others, which has got
me the same response from others without the shadow of arrogance or pride clouding our
interactions.
 I realized that my motivation is not consistent and while I may be proactive for a while, it is
not a habit. Thus, I have been trying to improve my procrastination habit by scheduling my
work and by following it sincerely. While my own attitude of taking things as they come have
led to failures many a times but the competition from my peers and their support at the
same time ensures that I keep walking towards my goals

Through the ups and downs in the past few months, time management has come out to be a very
important skill that should be in the repertoire of every individual. Academics have their own place
and so does internship activities but equally important is taking out time for oneself. The virtual
world has put all of us in a space, where screen time has increased from 4 hours to 16 hours a day
and that has not only built up stress but a fear. This part of life might not stay here forever but
virtual world will still be a big part of life. Maintaining a mental and physical health and taking out
time for it thus has become more critical than ever.

The feeling of burnout has been a constant for me ever since the 1 st month of M.B.A had passed.
Everything appears to keep piling up and without me able to finish it off within a stipulated time.
More than that, there are days where I don’t wish to move a muscle towards anything related to the
college life and just spend my day with myself, my parents and my hobbies with phone and laptop at
least 5ft away.

The result has been that I have started to hate college more than like it. Despite having friends and
support from my family, the absence of demarcation in my professional and personal life has left me
unable to cope with the new work each day and I find myself giving up halfway at times or
completing work only after struggle.

I do not wish to spend the rest of my college days with such a negative attitude towards it. Thus, it
has become more important than ever before to figure out my priorities and allocate my time
accordingly. I have been studios most of my life and I enjoy learnings new things academically.
Therefore, for me it takes priority over any other activity, especially given that each subject is new to
me given my background.

The fear of missing out on a good SIP at present, due to the downturn in economy after COVID and
being part of a new college without any history has only created more panic in me than is healthy. I
do not want to give up in doing my best, but I do not want to live in a complex from something that
is not 100% in my control.
My personal time and family are more important to me than any individualistic success, which is the
reason why I have not been very competitive. Any ambition in my life has been two pronged, to do
something I enjoy and to do it while getting time to spend with people important to me. Thus, now
when that balance has been completely toppled, I desperately try to change my behavior and
surroundings to balance them.

Learning time management has been difficult and I still believe that I am a newbie. There have been
occasions where due to my priorities, I have compromised on other choices but overall, it led to a
more positive change me in than negative. I like taking challenges when I know that the 1 st person, I
am competing with is myself. My touchstone is the ideal me and she is my goal. It is important for
me to be able to take my own time and progress at my own pace. While XL has accelerated that
pace, I do not want it to control it.

The balance that I seek must come from my own willpower and perseverance. Talking to others and
working out my own goals and expectations has been very fruitful. While time management is a
struggle that I am still failing at a lot, I am positive that I will be able to make a step by step
progression towards it by making small goals and being resilient in the face of failures.

The course has been very impactful in giving me an insight on myself and helping me develop a
thought to action approach. I implement what I learn in the sessions through an action plan and
after an internal feedback make changes to it to improve upon myself. I get to know about various
perspectives and try to take in some of other’s better qualities while also putting up myself out so
that a dynamic learning process continue. I believe through the course, we have built a habit to
continuously engage in the dialogue even after the class and that has been the biggest success of
taking this course.
 The Manager in Me

A manager has a versatile set of qualities. She must be a good communicator, a strong and reliable
leader, empathetic with respect for differences. She must be cognizant of the short term and long-
term goals and have the capacity to take harsh criticisms and move ahead from it. She needs to
determine when she is lacking and what steps to take to improve herself so that through her own
persistence, she can be a role model for those who follow her.

I believe that many of these skills were present in me before coming to XLRI, and that learning how
to polish them is and will be the goal of this M.B.A. What I lacked the most was how to present
myself, both verbally and non-verbally.

I lacked the communication skills and came timid and unclear in my thought projection to the others.
There has been a visible change in the improvement of my structured thinking and my ability to
confidently communicate with others.

The feedback I have received from others is that I have also become more practical in the way I look
at things. Not just intuitively but also through a careful analysis of the situation, I have developed a
more critical thinking. Through multiple group activities, I am developing more patience and sincerity
towards work. Since each one of us might have different schedules, we must learn how to work
towards a goal together and through individual participation. I have learned how to accommodate
others and when to be stringent with work no matter what the reasons might be.

Since each of us are directly responsible to the group, no one can take an indifferent stance and the
way to build a collective teamwork is what I have learned recently along with how to think like a
leader who is both agreeable and conscientious towards their goals. Due to the interaction with both
my batchmates, seniors, I have become better at communications and can talk without rushing.

Improving my communication skills has also improved my interpersonal relations. Though I still
desire a few intimate/close friendships, the feeling of collectiveness and cohesion has been helpful
in working towards goalposts that are important to not just me but others. Thus, I have learned to
be responsible for others and their concerns.

Through working in groups, I have also developed an individual sense of reliability which has also
been commented upon by others. I do not wait for the directions from others but take the initiative
to lead the work. This quality means that in the long term, people who depend on me can be
assured that I will not leave them without a direction just because I am lazy or uncooperative.

I am also learning to go ahead of my responsibilities and do more. Whether it is in terms of

interacting with others or working in a group project, I am slowly becoming a person who can steer
the group. While taking on more responsibilities than others may prove counter productive in the
long run, a good balance would be only beneficial to me. I believe in the notion that a leader is
someone who does twice the work her team does. While that is not ideal in a group work, learning
early on how to develop is has proven to be good for me.

I am calmer in the face of stress now. Though it is still an uphill battle, my capacity to push my limits
and take on more than my comfort level means that I am slowly moving towards actualizing my
potential. This is something that my parents have noticed and told me about. From their point of
view, I was lazy in using my talents but now I am learning how to use them and convert them into
something meaningful. Instead of being indifferent about myself, I am now trying to polish myself.
 ENCLOSURES

PLP 1

Maanvi Agarwal
BD20035

Session in brief:
The session included discussion on subjective interpretation perception and used an example of
1+1=2 and smiling, and which would be more objective in the eyes of 3-4-year-old child who isn’t
exposed to school learnings. It went onto explanation and queries resolution related to Course.

What have I Leaned:

There is no standardised and objective methodology to assess the world and the situation around is
and the same values can hold different meanings when 2 or more different people look at it from their
perspective.
The subjectivity of the world creates complexities in how to deal with it and a continuous
reassessment of the interaction between subject and the object of interaction to arrive at a solution
which in itself can only be termed as ‘one way of deriving at a result, amongst many’. The same
solution can be obsolete in different contexts, even with the same subjects because development and
perception formation are part of a constant process leading to an ever- changing resolution of a
situation.
Through the course briefing I learned that all opportunities come with its own risks and to get more
points in the high – performance quiz, I would have to become better at the subject to improve my
own percentage of success.

Action Plan:
I found myself acknowledging my own different outlook on my admittance to XLRI, Delhi- NCR,
when viewed from the point of view of a student coming from Arts background and differently when I
viewed it from a collective sum of all the abilities I possess ( which I consider high above average).
This difference is expounded more when it includes the outlook of my parents, acquaintances, and
competitors. I realized that my touchstone of assessment was affected by others and that can not yield
an efficient and healthy solution. To that effect I plan to do the following:

 Gather more information on the opportunities available.

 Resolve to act than react to the situation because of my uncertainties by becoming more
participative, creative and through taking initiatives.
 Expand my own perspective on the hurdles ahead and plan on cooperating with others to
arrive at a solution which might not be multi- dimensional through a single person’s
approach.
 Initiating discussions with different people to include more Points of View which can help me
broaden my own understanding.
 PLP 2
Maanvi Agarwal
BD20035
Session in brief:
The session led a discussion on behaviour and the two parts of it, action and reaction. The difference
in other species versus humans in their reason for acting.
Humans can react and act based on planning, certainty principle and provocation is used to induce
reactions and how it leads to far reaching consequences.

What I learned:
I learned that animals react based on instincts and that only humans act in a way to produce or create
something. This rationality in humans make them more productive but even humans can be
categorized as acting more or reacting more.
Provocation can lead to unhealthy results and a reaction can lead to further augmentation of reaction
in a moment of time. In such a situation the two aspects of a situation should be handled calmly and
independently as the consequences can be psychologically, physically, financially etc. destructive.
When we make a choice, though we are acting, we are also rejecting a choice which leads to
opportunity loss but in this we act with the assumption of some control over the results leading to
reduced loss.
Action can turn into reaction when it is unplanned, and the uncertainty of the follow is high and
beyond our control. This can reduce efficiency in long term.
In any situation, an individual should be cognizant of his/her responsibility and be able to critically
demarcate its parameters before taking a decision. Reacting without that analysis yields less and that
can have a spill over effect on those who view him/her as a leader or role model.

Action Plan:
1. I realized that I could get provoked and lose my calm easily when in front of authority figures
who are more powerful than me and they use the provocation to test me. Maintaining my
calm requires hard work but I plan to:
 Keep a cool head through meditation practice.
2. In groups and individually, I plan to give more consideration to precise and quality speech
than mere participation to feel less out of my control and therefore reacting uncreatively.
3. Deadlines also induce anxiety in me and I plan to,
 Plan a schedule to finish my work on time
 Take time to cool down to not burn myself out.
 Prioritize tasks in the order of their urgency.
I also plan to engage in more group discussions so that I can learn how different people react to
different situations and learn from observation some good points to apply for myself.
 PLP 3
Maanvi Agarwal
BD20035

Session in brief:
In today’s session we reflected upon how to write our PLP and how the flow of our own
communication makes our work attractive.
We discussed the definition and importance of performance and the intersection where a person
achieves the high performance.
What I have learned:
The importance of high performance has been rhetorical, because despite understanding its
importance, I hadn’t learned how to achieve it. The stress of the diverse roles that as a person I had to
engage in made me shy away from testing my limits. Today I learned that high performance doesn’t
mean stress and if I am willing to meet unreasonable expectations then I can achieve self-
actualisation.
My own experience as Civil Services Student and now as a XLRI student has been stifling at times. I
learned that I can improve myself, in my roles, through negotiation and education. The process is
time-taking but without challenging myself, I have set up myself for disappointment.
Hard work has to go hand in hand with initiation and yet understanding and developing on my own
strengths.
Action Plan:
I am determined to not pile my bucket of tasks until its overflowing and to take things one at a time. I
won’t be tied down by deadlines and long working hours and put my attention to things that I can do,
and ho to do it more efficiently first before taking upon more tasks.
I won’t hesitate to take an initiative just because I am afraid to realize them but cooperate along with
others to ensure that I don’t get buried under the load and still expand my threshold levels for both
stress and work.
I will do this and will take counselling in case I ever feel psychologically unstable so that I don’t
break down and injure myself in the process of improvement.
 PLP 4
Maanvi Agarwal
BD20035

Session in brief:
We exchanged views on how a person has to deal with all their roles. How time management is a
myth and that performance is independent of it. We also discussed about the prison we have put
ourselves into, because of which we are not mentally and physically free at our work.

We also discussed on what an organization and its role is.

What I have learned:

I have been lazy when it comes to taking on more work, but I have learned that doing so reduces my
productivity, without complete utilisation of my potential. As a part of this society, and on a nuclear
level, as part of the family organisation, I have the right and duty to contribute towards the
betterment of the society. I have to learn the skills that would make me capable, but they are
useless without productivity. Instead of blaming the lack of time, I have to become more efficient. As
a social person, I have learned that I have to be cognizant of my responsibilities. Thus, I have learned
that I have to free myself from the prison of my own mind and develop how to enjoy the process of
work that I actually want to do.

As part of my family, I have learned that my role is of a student, who observes and learns how to
become and perform as part of a structure, where I do my own part to the best of my abilities. I
learned that those same skills are played on a larger scale outside the family and that I have to use
the opportunities I have.

Action Plan:

I plan on exploring the options that I enjoy the most and negotiate with the areas which I have to
pursue compulsorily by devolving it into smaller tasks and doing them within a scheduled time.

Whenever I feel lazy, I would refreshen myself with walks and breaks and get on my work to avoid
the regret of missing out.

I also plan on working in groups, for tasks which appear boring to me so that I am not imprisoned by
my own limitations.
 PLP -5

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

We continued our discussion on ‘family as an organization’, the goals set by it and the variables that
effect it. We also had a debate on the need and various forms of diversity in an organization and
their differentiation into deep rooted and surface level diversity.

What I learned:

A family as a unit, reflects the needs and goals of society. Independent variables such as religion,
culture have a strong impact on us all. I am an Agnostic and that has made me more practical in my
approach to things, in contrast to my parents who follow Hinduism. Yet, despite the differences, I
learned that these differences create opportunities to learn from each other and to be respectful of
each other to the end.

This diversity in opinion and values can be tackled more comprehensively at a family level, but on a
larger scale, with less cohesive bonds, diversity can be an issue for many. I learned through life, and
lessons that diversity is not only about arriving at a holistic vision, its about figuring out which view
can be more practical at a certain time and how everyone can evolve from those diversities to a new
way of organising. E.g. India has a distinct way of living that is above the amalgamation of all
cultures.

Our values are deep-rooted but they can co-exist together only when we accept those differences as
an asset. I am learning on being a person who can ideally absorb this lesson in life.

Action Plan:

Despite believing myself to be flexible, I need to work on finding a way out of differences. I will work
on my ability to design a framework, include practical solutions that can be implemented in a phased
manner to add more weight to my points and to be able to rise up as a leader to include others. I will
work on my communication skills, by being more patient and by being more point- oriented so that
fruitful discussions can be the way ahead.

If I disagree with others’ points, I plan on taking my time away from the argument and explore more
discussions on the issue to develop my understanding without thoughtlessly calling other people
wrong.
 PLP 6

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

We did a Multiple Intelligence Test to explore our strengths in different intelligence parameters and
led a discussion on different types of abilities that could be differentiated into:

 Skills and competency – that are learned

 Talent – that we are born with
 Ability – that is a combination of the above two, and
 Potential – a limitless vault that we all hold but are unable to actualize due to various
barriers.

What I learned:
Through the MIT, I recognized my strengths in Musical/Rhythmic and Visual Intelligence, with sore of
9 each, followed by Intra-personal and Verbal/Linguistic Intelligence, with a score of 8 each. As a
Literature student trying to pursue M.B.A, I learned that my potential lays not in trying to be like
others but by using my strengths to bring new outlook to the same course. Music is strongly tied to
emotions and I learnt that if tied together with my own hobbies of photography and writing, I can
create projects that use a different approach. Yet, I learnt not to be tied down by my weaknesses
and to put in extra effort to develop optimum skills in quantitative aspects of Managerial Studies.

I learnt that I can only explore my potential, when I keep trying and without giving up to stress. With
my strengths as my backbone though, I shouldn’t feel under-confident nor that I am less than others.

Action Plan:

I plan to divide my energies and focus on both my strengths and weaknesses. I am determined to
spend at least an hour on my writing and music practice. I also plan to collaborate with others with
the same interests as me to develop innovative creations.

Through interacting with people who are stronger in areas that I am weak in, I plan on working out
knots in my own understanding and create diverse solutions to problems that all of us face, currently
academically and in future- based projects.

An example can be to create a blog that explores everyone’s strengths through creation of diverse
sections like debate, photography, musical videos, discussions and exploring exercises that will help
in development of physical strengths.
 PLP 7

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

In today’s session we discussed about attitude, what it is, how they can be formed and its impact on
our outlook and relations with others. We also talked in brief about how about Cognitive Dissonance
Theory and how we can change our attitude towards a situation which we find negative.

What I learned:

Taking from the previous session, my abilities form my beliefs and those beliefs in turn form my
attitudes. I learned that my attitude is impacted by my cognition, as to how I look at something. My
interpersonal abilities are lacking, that and the general emphasis on importance of communication
has made me perceive myself negatively. This thought leads me to believe that I am inferior to
others and lacking and that in general frames my attitude when I face anybody who is either high on
these intelligences or those in a power position. I learned that I give away the control of the frame to
the other person and that it leads to anxiety and a tone of bitterness towards others.

I learned that my own abilities can take a backseat if I focus only on what I don’t have and that I have
to trust myself, my own intelligence and tap into the differences that makes me unique. Though it’s
easier said than done, I learned that working on my attitudes will define how I can tackle with a
situation.

Action Plan:

I need to work on being more positive, hardy and confident towards my weak areas. To do that I
need to consistently counsel myself that I am not less than anybody, and that I stand on equal
grounds with the other party. In order for me to tackle my negative attitude, I should look and work
hard towards my positive attributes and use them in order to feel self-assured. This includes keeping
calm in difficult situations and that can be achieved through meditation and exercise.

I intend to be more flexible in terms of how infinite attitudes towards an object creates perception,
and for my own attitude to hold ground, I should be more proactive in seeking different outlooks and
trying to communicate my own attitude in an approachable and non-threatening way by being
humble but not subversive, assertive but not aggressive, open minded but not vague.
 PLP 8

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

We talked about selective perception and evaluation-based processing of inputs. We also learned
that different outputs are a result of varied attitudes, and to change attitude formation,
more/different data has to be given. We also see negative attitudes as normal, and so changing it is
difficult.

What I learned:

A very strong attitude that I have is regarding the differences propagated between men and women,
and subtly that attitude is also present in my parents. Their differences include their opinion that the
prescribed role of a man as a bread winner and of woman as a home maker is good for the society.
For the longest time, this attitude bothered me and made me feel insecure of my own freedom in
this world. I learned however, that their attitude is not wrong, the data that formed their attitude, is
based on their own reflections and perceptions and having an opinion different to that myself,
doesn’t make me right but just speaks of my own outlook. I learned that right and wrong is very
subjective and that to live by own attitude, I don’t have to justify it, I just have to give more inputs to
the other party to understand it and then too she/he may/may not accept it.

My attitude defines my competencies, and too have a narrow-minded and negative attitude to
different outlooks only subdues my progress. In order for me to grow, I learned that I need to
develop a mindset where I can look to others and see their attitude in a positive light or at least not
a negative one.

Action Plan:

That’s why when my parents feel that the old defined roles of men and women in society are
correct, I need to go to the base of it, see the result, analyse the pros and cons, and then give back
my own answers in a framework that allows for effective communication and development of mind.

I need to develop a habit of not believing that one way is right, and others wrong and for that I need
to first believe that I may be wrong as well.

Conflicts can also lead to mental stress, and to cope with it, I plan to work on segregating my
priorities and work on dealing with them on individual basis, because my own attitude towards
myself is too strict.

I also intend to communicate more with the people important to me and develop a better
understanding of their attitudes and the underlying belief systems.
 PLP 9

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in Brief:

The session reflected on the first quiz, and the learnings from it. It then continued the discussion on
attitude and the different types of Job attitudes and realizing their importance for the self and the
company in determining work behaviour of a person.

What I learned:

There are 5 types of job attitudes of which the two most important attitudes include the Job
Involvement and Organization Commitment. I learned that both Involvement and Commitment go in
hand and while the former works on our individualistic side through giving us a sense of dignity, the
latter gives us a sense of belongingness and identity.

I learned that it’s important to be involved with work, otherwise I would become miserable in my
job, that will not only reduce my productivity but also increase my hopelessness. High job
involvement will not only energize me but will give me the pride in being capable. For e.g. when I am
working in groups, research gives me a sense of satisfaction even though I might not be very good at
other parts of group work, like oral presentation.

Job involvement will also promote Organization Commitment like a connected string, especially if
our work is positively reinforced by the others in our group or our superiors. I feel more oriented
towards the group goal, when others respect my contribution. This in turn develops in me the
attitude to build a cohesive feeling towards my group and in turn work harder to promote and
fructify the end goals of my organization.

Action Plan:

There are many a times that I don’t feel happy with the work I have been assigned and it also makes
me feel more isolated from the rest of my peers who I feel have an undue advantage over me by
enjoying the work or adapting to it. I have to either switch my work or learn to adapt to it, even
though it’s outside my comfort zone. From my side, I can do this by learning more about my work,
about developing a deeper understanding of organization goals by talking to other members and
communicate with others to come to a space where I can work on things I am good at and enjoy
without compromising on the general work atmosphere and projects. I should also maintain a
flexibility in case differences gives rise to conflicts.
 PLP 10

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

In the session we learned the definition of Personality and the its structure as given by Sigmund
Freud – Id, Ego, and Superego. We also discussed the five stages of the Personality Development, a
cycle through which an individual develops his/her personality and the problems that can emerge
without properly resolving each stage.

What I learned:

Personality which is a sum total of our enduring aspects distinguishes us from other people, making
us unique. The human psyche is divided into 3 segments- Id, which is works on pleasure principle
and tries to satisfy instincts; Ego which tries to satisfy the needs through negotiation with reality i.e.
reality principle and Superego which is the moral police and judges whether our actions are in tune
with the principles and ethics established.

Ego gives one a sense of identity and any conflict between Id and Superego activates various
Defense Mechanism, the most common for me would be ‘Rationalization’. I learned that I am high
on Superego and that my every action is executed after a very rational approach and a little
deviation from my own ethics creates a very strong anxiety reaction in me along with a lot of guilt.
The way I cope with it is by trying to justify my wrong actions by making excuses but it is still only
able to protect me partially.

In my own Psychological Development, I realize that I negotiated with each stage very well but
despite my own sexual needs, I believe that my perception of need for the other sex i.e. men is very
low and I mostly view them with shallow feelings. Though I enjoy the company of men, between
men and women I feel more at ease and free in the company of women.

Action Plan:

The conflict between reality and my superego sometimes propels me to be rigid in my principles but
if I go against them, I feel strongly insecure. I plan on working on it through taking more pride in my
own ideals, even though that isolates me a bit from others. I want to develop a balance between my
ID and Superego and that can be built by working hard on accepting myself with my flaws and not
substantiating for them by pretending to be fake and also developing my own strengths and
intelligences and standing upon them.

In terms of my behaviour around men, I believe my own stereotypes towards them plays a big role in
my attitude and I can only change it through conditioning and exposure to men and communicating
with them. I will confront my own discrimination through continuous questioning and try to develop
a more coherent sense of myself around different sexes by training my thinking to understand that I
am same as the others, barring some.
 PLP 11

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

Today’s session was primarily focussed on personality and how they develop from the interaction
between values leading to development of preferences, in which no preference is superior to other
and gives way to differences that promote growth and diversity in society.

What I learned:

Jung and Meyers derived that personality is the result of an interaction between our preference,
environmental influences and choices. Through the MBTI, I discovered that my own personality type
is ENFJ. I learned that I am good at organizing, building human resources and skilled at building
human consensus. This data motivates me to focus on my strengths and expend my energy on things
that I can create the most out of. Though I am an extrovert, I am only partially so, which means that I
easily get nervous in situations with a lot of pressure. My personality defines me and while it
remains fairly consistent through the years, I can always learn where I need to work or take help.

One of the points in analysis was that I may not appear task- oriented to interviewers. I have
personally faced this situation and am aware that it arises due to lack of a structured thinking from
my side. I think long-term, but I do not minutely focus on each step to reach there as it makes me
feel claustrophobic. I learned that to resolve this problem I should try to display my soft strengths
and their utility in improving the bottom line. While it won’t resolve the other person’s biases most
of the time, it will give me a strong playing field.

Plan of Action:

My main target areas would be to take as many mock interviews as possible and try to develop an
understanding on what is the criteria of having an interview, and the outlook of the interviewers. By
taking feedback from many people, I will understand where my thought process comes off as more
unclear and focus on it to develop a better communication skill. I will also focus more on my
strengths than weakness and try not to feel insecure about the latter by displaying my contribution
in individual and group works.
 PLP 12

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

The session was on values, those which stay the same in every situation. While beliefs are not
questionable, values can be questioned and only those values make our core which don’t change in
any situation. We also took a case example to discuss more upon it.

What I learned:

Every value has a context and sometimes we may compromise upon our values if we think that we
can get away with it. Values determine how we react to situation and what learnings we take from
it. I learned that I tend to focus beyond the surface and take a more in-depth route than the straight
forward one. I learned that different people analyse each situation differently and that they view
different situations from the lens of their own values. Each person has a different regard for different
values, and they are mainly formed by our own experiences in life. I learned that I give more weight
to initiative and the strength to take a decision in a situation where you can easily give up or wash
off your hands.

The most important thing I learned is that different values easily lead to conflict and finding a
common ground comes not out of agreement but part compromise from each person’s side. Thus I
work well with people even if they are a little unenthusiastic, but I have difficulty working with
people who are completely free-riders and push all the work upon me.

Plan of Action:

Values build a person, but different values shouldn’t lead to conflict. My best way to work around
the situation is to be as flexible as possible but not force myself to work with people whose core
principles are completely different from mine. I would also develop more respect for the values of
different people, but not force myself to agree to them by being as unbiased and communicative as
possible.
 PLP 13

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Before I had started the preparation process for M.B.A., the governing thought in my mind was to
find a way to secure stability in my life. M.B.A. seemed the most practical choice to build a
foundation on which I can pursue my goal of having my own business.

The preparation for CAT and XAT began in June, and despite less than six months for preparation, I
was confident that I would be fine with the exams due to a good academic track record. Quantitative
ability proved to my most difficult subject, then and now, and a lack of improvement in it left me
with the belief that I may not be able to crack the competitive exams.

My time from November to January end was spent in worrying excessively whether I was making the
right choice in pursuing M.B.A.

When the results started coming out and I got 95 percentile in XAT, I was excessively happy and
doubtful at the same time. That doubt, I believe stemmed from my own consciousness of not being
from an Engineering or Commerce background and feeling inferior to my many competitors. That
doubt must have also shown during my interview process for XLRI.

Not getting through to Jamshedpur was a setback, and even though I had an alternative, my own
belief that I deserved the best kept me from feeling satisfied about the outcome. Thus when I got
through for XLRI, Delhi, I accepted the chance with the utmost belief that I there will be many
opportunities to make use of and redefine myself.

Induction week exposed me to the level of competition and that I always have to be on my toes.
Balancing academics with the SIP process was too challenging at times, and more than once I felt like
giving up. Talking to my parents and seniors helped me on focussing on the bigger picture without
getting lost in the details and that making mistakes is okay than ruining your health over stress.

As I near the end term, my emotions are in constant fluctuation of self-depreciation and optimism
that everything will turn out for the best. Yet, what keeps me going is my own desire to prove myself
to me and others and to be a person capable enough to stand through any kind of storm.

I look forward to the time when I can balance my schedule without feeling overburdened and
mentally relaxing a bit so that I can also enjoy what I am working towards, than just be driven to it by
a sense of being left behind.

As I get more exposed to what management means, I get more interested in it and look forward to
becoming a leader that can put to test her skills and intelligence to a place which fits me best.

 McClelland’s Theory of Needs can be applied to understand my current level of needs. My

need for achievement and need for power at the present is strongest because of my own
sense of inferiority and self-consciousness, which I believe I can only overcome when I have
achieved something tangible and that which is visible to others.
 Victor Vroom’s Self-Efficacy Theory and Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs would be theories
under which I would work to remain motivated and come out as a winner. I need to believe
that I am capable of performing either through learning, arousal or observation and that I
can put those learnings to actualize my potential without being lost in the crowd.
 PLP 14

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

We discussed about perception as being an individualistic attribute and how it can be affected by
external and internal factors. We talked about Fundamental Attribution Error and Self- Serving Bias
and why perception is important for an individual.

What I learned:

I learned that our perception is influenced by our experiences, values, culture etc. and that for the
same object, different people can have different perspectives. No perception is wrong and it’s an
outlook on life and how we interact with it. I tend to blame internal factors like poor preparation,
lack of motivation etc. when I fail and give credit to external factors when I win, like absence of
competition, fair judgement.

In reality, any action is both a result of external and internal factors, but different people tend to
focus on the outcome differently leading to differences in opinion. I learned that these opinions are
important because they teach us the different ways to view the world.

But as a future manager and as an individual also, I learned that it’s important to realize that reality
is a combination of these perceptions and I have to be holistic in my own outlook in order to took
qualitative decisions. I can only be a great leader when I recognize these differences and be able to
also view my perception from an outsider’s point of view.

Action Plan:

The best way to build a holistic perception is to be more observant of the going on around you and
to engage with as many people as people. I plan to get over my hesitancy to approach others in
asking for their perception when I have already formed an opinion.

I plan to read newspapers editorial and watch debates because big decisions play an important role
in our life but our own opinion towards it is very narrow. I plan to expose myself to different
perceptions by also holding debates and discussions with my peers and to give as much respect to
their perception as I would give to mine.
 PLP 15

Maanvi Agarwal

BD20035

Session in brief:

In this session, we discussed about emotions, their importance, and various other aspects of it. We
also did an Emotional Intelligence Test to find out our individual self-awareness of our emotions,
their regulation, and social skills. We also talked about mood as an adjustment mechanism and how
it impacts our work.

What I learned:

Emotions have a big impact on how we tackle a situation. I am more emotionally sensitive, which
means that I tend to sometimes become prone to be dissuaded/persuaded by small amounts of
discouragement/encouragement. Through the Emotional Intelligence Test, in which I scored 225, I
found out that I am amongst the average people in scores. I learned that I am an empathetic person,
but I sometimes fall less while handling the emotions of others. This tends to happen because I try to
solve the situation more practically. I also learned that while temperament cannot change, mood is
how one adjusts with a situation. I find that my mood swings happen more when I feel I have less
control over the situation. Failure does not daunt me, but helplessness does. In the past few days, I
have especially gone through a lot of emotional turmoil due to my inability to control my
surroundings. Keeping in mind the Affective Emotional Theory, I figured out that to give my best
performance, I need to find that sense of independence even if that does not yield me the idle result
of greater success.

Action Plan:

I panic when I feel I am falling behind others, and this situation is mostly aggravated by the threats of
others. To get a better hold on my emotions, I need to accept that making a wrong decision is not
the end of the world. For that, I need to loosen up myself. The only way I can tackle the situation
beyond my control, is by getting a stronger grip on my emotions. Breathing techniques, or any form
of exercise and meditation will help me.