As I stood in the hallway listening to an unfamiliar teacher explain Peer Listening , my

mind was racing. Little did I know the trauma my dad put me through helped me become not

only a better Peer Listener, but also a stronger person.

This class initiated my recovery and taught active listening skills, crisis training and the

importance of mental health. Peer Listeners are trained to observe and distinguish the signs of

suicide and to help students work through challenges. I was recommended by former and current

teachers who knew my story and were confident I could use it to help others while continuing to

heal myself. Honored to be recommended, I applied and am currently in my second year of Peer

Listening.

I realize now the trauma I had been through can help me grow and others cope. I often

answer classmates with my own survival story.

I was eight years old. After a soccer game my life changed forever. While still at the

fields, my brother and I were pulled off to the side of the car, and my mom said, “We are getting

a divorce.” This would be the beginning of my dad’s oppression, creating an uphill battle

towards freedom.

My dad is a mentally and emotionally abusive person. Everything was always about him

and his feelings; it took me time to realize that I was a pawn in his game of revenge against my

mother. He would make derogatory statements and hateful things to us. I watched my younger

brother cower in fear and felt like a helpless pawn. I shut down - did the minimum to interact.

My mom sent me to counselors but it is a journey with ups and downs. I didn't feel heard. Maybe

I was unable to really share what was abuse because I didn't understand it myself.
 At 14 years oldI began to see my dad’s games. With support I learned that I do have a

voice and it does deserve to be heard. I learned people outside of my family do support me; I am

not alone. Confrontation was a challenge for me. I took small steps to stand up for myself to my

dad. A set back was when my sixth grade self heard the judge flippantly tell me to “Suck it up.” I

have always known something was not right after my parents split, but I was not old enough to

comprehend why or how a parent could manipulate their own children.

Though the ongoing battle with my dad has not been easy, it has been a learning

experience. No one deserves to be treated the way my mother, brother and I were treated.

Sometimes even today writing my last name or seeing it in print causes my stomach to churn, but

I know I will continue to battle. My story has helped me become a stronger person and know that

I can help other people in my life by being a “peer listener'' forever.