THE

HERETICAL
MUSEUM
OF V. A. BEAU

WEEABOO NONSENSE IN THE 41ST MILLENIUM

BY KONIGSTEIN AND ERIKHASTINGS
Version 0.5, 2021
Contents

:
This Book

Patron Roll of Honour:

Acknowledgements

A note on Availability
Changelog
Part 1: Weapons

Weapon Qualities

•
•

•
Recreated Weapons
Nearly all of these weapons had some kind of
spiritual power to them, and were sealed in a
vault behind heavy psy-warding. There is an
almost… storybook quality to their design, as if
they were conceived by artists, and not
weaponsmiths. The origin of the “Recreated” title
affixed to them by Beau is unclear.
Techpriest Marktwelve and
Psyker Sophistus are still in disagreement
whether or not this dusty tome is a miracle of
archaeotech or some kind of abominable warp
device. The text inside is unreadable, but appears
to be able to spontaneously generate weapons out
of thin air.
From the desk of V.A. Beau: “I had
hoped this three-jointed staff would share the
remarkable spiritual powers of its wielder. Alas,
little remains.”
All of our personnel
have reported sudden feelings of dread or betrayal
emanating from it, and Psyker Sophistus claims it
has a particularly potent anti-psychic aura. A dark
and accursed thing.
This massive, excessively
ornate gauntlet, decorated with a huge xenos-
skull, hides a potent Force weapon, or so claims
Psyker Sophistus. Curiously, it seems to manifest
purple electrical discharges when used.
We had thought this to be a
mundane stub revolver, until we test-fired it and
nearly brought a wing of the museum down. The
bullets it fires are some kind of miniaturized
graviton warhead, and flicking the weapon’s
hammer appears to activate an “overcharge”
function of remarkable power.
From the desk of V.A. Beau: “A sword
and endless reflection of swords, conjuring forth
an infinite universe of blades. Its power seems to
grow and change with time, almost as if whoever
created it is still working to refine and improve it.
What can compare to an omnipotent blade?”
My weapons experts
claim this bizarre joined staff has a mind of its
own, and seems to have a real knack for attacking
from unexpected directions. We are still unsure,
as with so many other pieces of equipment here,
whether this is a psychic effect or the result of
some unusually potent machine spirit.
An utterly
nightmarish piece of what we presume to be
xenotechnology- though it appears to be a simple
piece of wood, painted black with a red stripe
down the middle, it conceals some kind of
nanotechnological ‘micro-chainblade’. Truly a
weapon capable of unleashing remarkable
bloodshed.
From the desk of V.A. Beau:
“My Astropaths claim this pretty little ornament
hides a remarkable and dark power. I, however,
am of the opinion that something so frilly and
covered in hearts could not possibly be evil.”
This blessed piece
was stored alongside the Cosmi Chevalier, and
merely being in its presence fills one with hope
and a desire to secure a future for humanity.
Chaplain Croesun insists it is some kind of holy
relic, though I am not wholly certain.
Dust Weapons
These truly bizarre arms are as colourful as they
are deadly, and were indeed coated in a thick
layer of dust when we found them in one of the
underground storage facilities on Animuu’s
northern continent.
I cannot imagine the kind of martial arts that
would have to exist to justify the use of weapons
of such unconventionality. One cannot deny they
have a certain stylishness to them, however.
This particular weapon showed
signs of extensive reconstruction and repair. It is
a double-ended spear with an integrated combi-
autogun, which despite its shape sits surprisingly
well in the hand.

From the desk of V.A. Beau:

A round shield, equally
battered as the javelin that goes with it. Despite
the colour scheming, I find myself reminded of
certain ceremonial weapons favored by the
Ultramarines, or the shield generators employed
on Tau battlesuits.
I had always been under the
impression that ballistic gauntlets were
assassination tools, but clearly, I stand corrected.
These reinforced power gloves are also equipped
with a set of shotguns firing incendiary buck.
“Elegant, simple, utterly unrestrained, and a
pretty shade of pink to boot. Who knew that a
grenade launcher and power hammer would go so
well together?”
This elegant, flowery duellist’s
rapier has some kind of integrated revolving
cylinder mechanism built into the base-
Techpriest Marktwelve speculates it may have
been part of a larger combiweapon, but there is no
evidence of parts having been removed. It is
intensely psycho-conductive, however.

A massively impractical combat

scythe also equipped with a surprisingly potent
long-las. It seems to be designed such that the
scythe blades allow the weapon to be braced,
though why anyone would bring a sniper’s
I have seen weapons such as weapon into a melee is beyond me.
these before, wielded by hive nobles looking to
impress the credulous. The blade should utterly
ruin the pistol’s balance, and vice versa, and yet
somehow, they work. The flechette rounds these
weapons fire are capable of a remarkable degree of
area saturation- is this indicative of some kind of A curious cleaver-like sword,
technological cross-pollination with Eldar connected to an integrated monofilament line,
shuriken weaponry? connected to a powerful little autopistol firing
some kind of hallucinogenic dart round. This is
clearly technology of Human make, but
something about it feels dangerously Orkish.
For once I see the
logic in this weapon- if some upper hive armourer
were to gain access to the plans for such a
combination of weapons I have no doubt they
would sell well on those worlds where nobles
traditionally carry blades. The sword’s heavy
sheath can be unfolded into a bladed shield, or be
left on to convert the small sword into a much
larger and significantly heavier two-hander. A
clever conceit.
Trick Weapons the Expanse, and drive their wielder mad with
Techpriest Marktwelve Data Log: “Logged weapons bloodlust. The depths of the Rogue Trader’s
discovered alongside cache of xenos and mutant heresies grow ever blacker.
trophies, including severed heads, limbs, etc.
Weapons designs originate from culture with
clearly high degree of skill in metallurgy and
mechanism design. Evidence of STC-derived
manufacturing techniques unclear. All weapons
suffer from significant surface corrosion.

Conjecture: These weapons have shed the blood I am familiar with bladed canes but
of ancient and terrible beasts.”
this device extends the concept to a new level; a
twist of the handle converts into a curiously
There is clear evidence that the serrated whip, no doubt capable of inflicting
‘hunters’ had access to sophisticated gunpowder horrific wounds.
technologies, so this weapon stands out as another
curios anachronism. Its springy blade splits in
half to form the arms of a surprisingly potent
longbow- though I cannot help but wonder how
much use a bow would be against enemies of any This is disturbingly
size. similar in form and function to the ‘humane’
grox-killing mechanisms I have seen employed on
agri-worlds. The wielder sets off an explosive
charge at the moment the weapon contacts the
target, driving a huge metal spike into it. That
said, I have never seen one wielded so it can be
Came even more heavily protected punched with.
than the Bone Dagger, for good reason- even I
could sense the touch of Chaos from it. The very
air around this spiny, monstrous-looking mace
stinks of gore and iron, and according to the
accompanying label it is necessary for the wielder
to sacrifice their own essence to make it stronger.
By the Emperor, where did Beau find these
things?

Techpriest Marktwelve Data

Log: “A compact blast furnace built atop the head
of a striking weapon. Simple and devastating.”

We found these in a heavy

ceramite case covered with blessings and
benedictions. From what I have pieced together
from Beau’s writings, these daggers were carved
from the bones of some Chaos-twisted
monstrosity on a frontier world in the depths of
A massive cleaver, equipped with a
switch that deploys it into a huge flail or whip.
What monstrosities did the people who made
these weapons expect to fight? There are still bits
of dried viscera stuck in the serrations.
 The accompanying texts
claim this… thing is cursed. But how in the
Emperor’s name do you fight someone with a
wheel?
Of similar make to the Red
Blade, though not obviously corrupt in any way,
this two-bladed sword splits neatly down the
middle of the handle to become a matched
duelling sword and main gauche dagger. This is
yet another ‘trick weapon’ which would not be
out of place in a hive spire.
This obviously ancient
sword is made out of the same ultra-light material
as the Merciful Blades. It comes with a detachable
folding haft- a few quick movements and it
becomes a scythe of tremendous reach.
Marktwelve claims its construction is more
primitive and personalized than the others, as if it
was some one-off construction by a single
tradesman.
Chaplain Croesun’s Missives: “I take
the writings on this massive greatsword to be
some kind of holy inscriptions, though to what
blasphemous god they are dedicated I dare not
speculate. Though I am no master of the aesthetic
arts, I would presume this blade to have been
constructed by those who built the Pick and the
Mallet.”
 handle nearly quadruples in length, making them
effective in both close and open quarters.

This appears to be little more than a

gravestone lifted from the earth with a
mechanism to attach the hilt of a sword. The
wielders of such tools were no doubt men of great From the desk of V.A. Beau:
strength, but I wonder if their souls were pure? “The hunters said this was an archaic relic, from
the first days of their endless war against the
beasts. It is a quick and elegant thing, despite its
age- lead with the scimitar edge, then collapse it
down into a shortsword to get inside the enemy’s
I almost mistook this for a piece of reach.”
damaged architecture when I stumbled across it,
for it resembles little more than a sharpened
sword-sized metal spike. The trigger converts it
into a long war pick, with a wickedly sharp tip
that is surprisingly good at cleaving through Techpriest Marktwelve Data Log:
armour. “Shield frame and decorative elements are of
human make, but ceramic ‘glass’ core is replete
with unidentifiable chemical compounds
indicating xenos origin. Device demonstrated
extreme thermal and electromagnetic dissipation
properties during testing.”
Beau seems to have taken quite a
shine to these weapons, as we have acquired more
than two dozen of them, each slightly different.
Their operation is simple- pull a lever and the
 but wonder if the Ordo Malleus should be
contacted.

A sword of unusual metallurgy.

Marktwelve claims it rivals Lathe-wrought
weapons for weight. It splits from a shortsword
into two daggers when activated, and the speed
with which even a layman can attack is
staggering- as if nothing is there to slow the arm.

One of the armsmen picked this Clearly, this is of different

up bare-handed despite the warning labels,
claiming the blade spoke to him. Before we
gunned him down, he claimed the glowing blade
wanted to guide him to greatness, and managed to
project some kind of warp energy blast from the
blade.
It is no wonder Beau was so dissolute, if he kept
such Chaotic relics so close to him. I cannot help
manufacture than the cleavers. It somewhat
resembles the Myrtle Rapier we discovered
earlier, though in this case the black powder
firearm component is actually functional. It
would make for an elegant duellist’s weapon I
suppose, especially if your enemy is not expecting
you to shoot them with your sword.
 Techpriest Marktwelve Data
Log: “Weapon consists of twelve pounds of
wrought iron with a handhold on one side.
Exceptionally good for hitting things with.”
From the desk of V.A. Beau: “It draws
upon the user’s very essence! Oh, the genius of
the east, that could turn plain steel into an edge
sharper than a soul. This blade- this curved,
simple thing- is the bane of any enemy. I think,
sometimes, I hear it calling me.”
A remarkably powerful piece of
clockwork is at the heart of this brutal spiked
club, which unfolds into a spinning circular saw
blade on the end of a haft. I shudder to imagine
what combat with such a weapon would
resemble.
This ‘weapon’ is little more
than the dessicated forelimb of some monstrous
xenos creature, which still twitches with
preternatural life. Just holding it caused me a
sense of deep physical revulsion, especially when
hitting a nub of gristle caused it to spring open
and whip around, its claw flailing wildly.

No elegance, no grace, no
respect for form. Just a big, serrated hunk of
metal that unfolds into a bigger, serrated hunk of
metal. The people who created this were mad,
desperate or possibly both.
Chaplain Croesun’s Missives: “To
wield a living xenoform as a weapon? Heresy in
the highest! A blasphemy against the works of
man that turns the stomach! The very fact that it
draws so much power from the human form is
further sign of its innate malice and corruptive
effect on the soul.”

A monstrously twisted
woodcutter’s saw, which unfolds into a sort of
oversized glaive. These people had an
uncomfortable obsession with saws, I presume.

The technological standout from

the ‘Trick Weapons’, some clever internal
chemical reaction or mechanical generator creates
a brief but intense surge of electrical energy about
the head of this weapon when it is dragged along
a flat surface. Perhaps these hunters were more
technologically advanced than we presumed?

Hunting Weapons
Xenographer Thripsus Reports: “As all of these
weapons appeared to be of human make, but were
composed of a huge varieties of xenos-tissue,
Interrogator Exxhi has asked me to perform the
examinations on them.
At first glance, I am amazed at the scale of these
weapons- whatever world they hail from must
either have significantly lower gravity or a much •
stronger native strain of humans. A Death World •
certainly- I find myself reminded of Catachan
hunting knives when looking at the hardware I’ve •
been presented with. There are dozens of
individual variations, but I have categorized them •
into 15 separate types.”

“These weapons were, aside

from their materials, generally quite mundane.
Merely a paired longsword and a shield cleverly
constructed to allow the user’s off-hand to remain
free in a fight. Most of them were composed of
xeno-materials designed to inflict poison or other “I thought for a moment we
unpleasant side-effects upon an enemy.”
had run into another one of those gruesome ‘trick’
weapons here, but apparently, I was mistaken.
This overcomplicated axe/greatsword
combination includes a sort of… boosting system
in which a battery overcharges the latent effects
of its xeno-tissues. All in all, an extraordinarily
complicated weapon, but I imagine its damage
“I can only presume the output is phenomenal. “
inhabitants of this world had some contact with
the Orks, for only they would be mad enough to
utilize a small-calibre howitzer as a melee
weapon. Most of the body of the lance appears to
be a complicated heat-dissipation or recoil-
absorption mechanism, made even more
complicated by the xeno-substances involved.”

•
“Many human cultures •
bring musical instruments into battle with them, •
but actually weaponizing those instruments
seems a little… excessive. They are all large and •
heavy enough to strike nearly as hard as the •
Monstrous Mallets, however.”
•
 “I am struggling primarily for slashing over stabbing.
to understand this device. It is a sword and Unfortunately their length meant several of our
oversized shield which can become an oversized armsmen hurt their companions rather badly
axe and contains some sword of energy-regulation while testing them.
system with severe
limitations on its
maximum load and
which is charged by
what might be the
kinetic energy of
impacts? Both
Magos Marktwelve
and I are stumped
by this one.”

“This is functionally
identical to its lighter
counterpart, save that
it lacks the capacity for
rapid fire, appearing to
be designed more for
shot-per-shot damage
rather than suppressing
fire. Astoundingly, the
recoil is light enough
that it can actually be
fired from the hip
without serious
injury.”

“I thought these weapons were

ornamental at first- they appear to large, too
rough to be called blades. One of our enhanced
Ogryn guards took a great liking to them,
however, describing them as extremely
comfortable to wield and even large enough to
block attacks.”
Though more reasonably
proportioned than the Monstrous Blades, these
weapons are all longer than I am tall, and fitted
with curiously-designed sheaths made to
maximize the speed of the wielder’s draw. From
the shape of their tips, they seem designed

“The technology at work
here is, curiously, not all that dissimilar to a
sacred Boltgun. Instead of a twin-stage explosive
charge, the weapon instead uses spring arms to
accelerate the projectile before it detonates.
The efficiency of the mechanism is such that it
can fire at an extreme rate of fire. One thing does
concern me, however- at this elevated rate of fire
we have been unable to determine where the
projectile actually comes from.”
“I have read of various xenos
species using unusually-constructed bow weapons
of considerable power, but these bows, taller than
a man, beggar belied. They require gigantic
strength to even draw, but launch arrows several
meters long over extraordinary distances. A
clever sighting system even allows them to be
fired in high arcs- with a few minutes’ practice
one of our armsmen could reliably hit a man-
sized target three hundred paces away, though the
strain has permanently damaged his shoulder, I
believe.”
“How one manages to swing a
mallet that weighs almost as much as a full-blown
human being is beyond me. As with the
Monstrous Blades, the Ogryns were quite taken
with these.”
“The only thing in common
between all the paired blades in Beau’s ‘Hunting’
collection was their ferocity- these weapons seem
designed for pure offense, often with designs that
minimized protection for the hands while
maximizing striking power. Several of them also
took the form of a variety of bladed gauntlets or
claws- I’d imagine a wielder would take on a truly
devilish appearance.”
“These extended polearms and
paired shields seemed designed for use by cavalry,
but we could find no design features that would
allow them to be braced against a saddle or
anything of the like. Still, they have prodigious
reach.”
“This peculiar device seems to be
some form of unusually advanced organic
technology, with many of its original components
degraded beyond compare. Some of them appear
to have been designed to fire a projectile of some
kind, though the mechanism to do so is rotted
away, Still, it is a lightweight, flexible and
extremely acrobatic weapon with almost
supernatural balance.”

Hunting Weapon Exotic Ammunition

Hyperdimensional Weapons
Beau’s records on this section were surprisingly
complete, and unsurprisingly heretical. We
haven’t actually opened the bulkhead doors
leading to the “Hyperdimensional” wing of this
particular storage bunker, because the walls began
to drip blood and Psyker Sophistus had a fit as we
approached.
From the desk of V.A. Beau: “The heart of the void!
The Heart of the Void! All mankind’s glories and
sins, compiled in one place! Not a game, but a
whole universe! And they came armed!”
“They say the blood god prefers
his weapons with an edge, but blunt force trauma
causes internal bleeding, does it not?”
“Oh noble needle, how sweet is
thy sting! A single strike fills the blood with
surging poisons, and surging joy.”
“It appeared in the
catacombs one day, whispering sweet nothings.
With reverence, I approached it. Affixed to its
whirling surface was a note, in a pretty hand. ‘Let
us not be forgotten.’”
“Within its crystal blade the Planet-
Named One sealed daemon creatures from
beyond the Warp itself. Its purple glow- so sweet.
So worthy of a top protagonist.”
 “Even the Two Brutes tend to
their sick, but in ways that I cannot consider
‘safe’. What medical tool would need chain-
teeth!”
“Their great Gestalt empowers them,
but in the realm of the physical they are still flesh
and blood and bone.”
“A ragged doll that bends the will and
twist the mind of all who touch it! How
adorable!”
“Excess in everything. In victory,
in attack, in confidence. At the height of glory,
the user, she whispers, will make baseless quips
when striking the foe.”

“The Changer of Ways gifted it

with terrible, remarkable luck. Its spirit is
mutable, indecisive, afire with an inability to
decide.”

“The colours! The lights! The

Sound! Every aspect shimmers! An unlearnable
weapon for the uninitiated.”
Encant Pistol
We found a single example of this strangely
elongated single-shot pistol, and Emperor be
praised have determined that not only is it
Human archaeotech, but it was built somewhere
in the vicinity of Terra, more than thirty
thousand years ago!

The weapon’s shells are each individually

numbered, and appear to function like
extraordinarily compact Vortex weapons,
triggering controlled Warp effects on impact. For
all that it is unbelievably stable- Sophistus
believes it might originate from a time when the
energies of the Immaterium were calmer and less
harmful. We have found quite a few of each type
of shell, but no evidence of shells numbered 1, 2, 7,
8 or 9.

Beau’s notes mention his

suspicions of other Encant
weapons out there, but
despite a thorough scouring
of those areas of Animuu
currently accessible to us we
have only found this solitary
example.
Illusory Weapons
I worry that our continued exposure to such
degrees of bizarre and heretical technology is
having a deleterious effect on our sanity. Many in
the exploratory party have reported strange and
vivid dreams. Only last night I dreamt… the
details are hazy, lord Inquisitor, but a voice
seemed to be calling me from a green and pleasant
land, which radiated a strange and primal energy.
I saw a phantasmagoric view of flowers, a
compelling subterranean animism. It is difficult
to describe. When I awoke, there was a ledger in
my hand- another one of Beau’s texts, describing
in fragmentary and confused detail the artifacts
he had recovered from a “Land of Illusions.”
The sketch of this weapon
was immediately familiar- I have seen it in
images of the mighty weapons of the Custodian
Guard who protect the Imperial Palace on Holy
Terra. What- what does this mean?
Techpriest Marktwelve insists
that this is either related to or a descendant of the
pattern for the “Sollex-Aegis Energy Blade”,
whatever that might be.
To think that a humble stopwatch
could scare a mind as twisted as Beau. This page
was ripped to ribbons, as if it had been hit by
many blades. Supposedly, the device can stop the
flow of time itself… and within the frozen time,
“a World of knives.” Whatever that means.
This entry makes even less sense
than the rest- while it is named similarly to Tau
fusion weaponry, the arm-mounted device
described could only be some kind of ancient
graviton weapon. Just who are the inhabitants of
this Land of Illusions?
And of course, after page upon
page of marvels and madness… an umbrella
which can fold space. I must confess to not
drawing the obvious connection between keeping
the rain off and punching holes in the fabric of
reality.
So many of these treasures
of Beau’s seem to, for lack of a better explanation,
alter fate or probability. Certainly, he may claim
this weapons grants blessings and miracles, but at
whose expense?
Supposedly, a magical text
belonging to a wise, powerful and very violent
sorceress. Curiously, the page it was mentioned
on was covered with crude sketches of tiny dolls,
wielding what could only be power weapons.
Clearly a smaller “main-gauche”
equivalent to the Roukanken. Beau mentions it
“cutting spiritual ties”, though what this actually
means is unclear.
To find an object described as
“holy” amongst this textbook of surreal madness
seems laughable. And yet, the sketches of the
patterns are unquestionably similar to devotional
artwork to the Emperor… I wish I understood.
And now it all becomes
clear- clearly this is a demoniac weapon, which
subjects its targets to horrific madness. Beau, you
fiend!
The book’s first entry speaks of a
“miniaturized furnace”, a patterned octagonal
block of a strange and uncanny metal. Within it,
it is said, hums a limitless energy source drawn
from the gods themselves.
And then, on the very next page… a
plain-looking pipe, filled with an endless supply
of a mysterious drug. The Land of Illusions is a
land of madness and inconsistency.
Another cursed Warp
weapon- this device fits the descriptions Psyker
Sophistus has given of the sorcerous powers of
Tzeentch. A weapon of merciless domination,
seeking to corrupt and enslave the minds of the
weak-willed.
Another curious spot of mundanity.
A long power sword of exotic make. One cannot
help but wonder just how far afield the patterns
for power weaponry has spread through the
universe. This is a classic main-hand weapon,
simple and brutally effective.
A sick and joyous thing, as Beau
describes it. Something akin to the Trick
Weapons in its indiscriminate and savage
reaping.
nameless power what
nameless power at work and yet the page is both
blank and full of terrible truths WHAT DARK
POWERS ARE AT WORK HERE? It bears no
name…
 Notion of combat using a pair of
Revengeful Weapons power-assisted shears utterly absurd. See ref: Ork
“Killa Kan” melee weapons. And yet… I find
Techpriest Marktwelve Data Log: “Following myself wanting to give them a chance.
discovery of book of “Illusory Weapons”,
Interrogator Exxhi is taking several days of rest
leave aboard ship. I will step in for this catalogue.
These weapons are, thankfully, of Human make,
many with Machine Spirits that are both active Derivative of Astartes riot
and well cared-for. Conjecture: does Beau shield- energy coils deliver power concussion on
maintain access with some lost and strikes. A weapon which, imployed inccorectly,
technologically advanced human colony? could conjure feelings of overconfidence.
Conclusion: No shield confers invincibility.
Blade of high craftsmanship and
quality, with a machine spirit that delights in
unleashing its strength upon its enemies. I
confess to losing control of my scientific
objectivity and cutting several lab benches into
small pieces.
Archaic punching knives.
Warning: red tinge on blade possibly
Curiously short handles, obviously designed for
a result of years of exposure to human blood repeated and rapid attacks that wear a target
without adequate cleaning. Chaotic corruption down. Conjecture: did the wielder of these knives
possible. Weapon employs a curious explosively- have extendable arms?
triggered scabbard, allowing for remarkably quick
drawing. A novel concept.
Mechanism by which this
polearm constructs small explosives internally is
unclear. Upon contact with foe, explosions cause
intense disorientation. Speculation: Why does it
have hands at the ends?
Analysis: a dismounted servitor I refuse to believe that this is
weapon. A mono-edge chainflail of considerable actually Necrodemis. And yet the [REDACTED]
power and finesse, though much too dangerous
for human use. Handling of such a weapon by an
unaugmented soldier highly illogical.
Daemonic Blades
Chaplain Croesun’s Missives: “In light of the other
wonders, horrors and heresies we have discovered
thus far, it seemed only a matter of time before
we stumbled across something truly abominable.
Thankfully, Beau seemed aware of the sinister
nature of these four sinister blades; they are
sealed in a hexagrammatic vault of great age and
superior construction. Thank the Emperor the
wards still hold.

For obvious reasons we have not investigated the

weapons closer, though I am tempted to have the
entire vault cast into the nearest star for safety’s
sake. Interrogator Exxhi has conducted a
thorough review of Beau’s notes, giving us some
inkling of these weapons’ foul and blasphemous
purpose.”

This chipped and rusted

blade seems to possess the ability to absorb the
souls of enemies it defeats, granting it dark and
terrible powers. Beau refers to it as the “Sword of
Destruction” several times, and hints heavily that
it is imbued with some sort of malign
intelligence, and has some capacity to change in
form. Once again, I find myself wondering;
where did he find these things?
 Beau’s notes become
particularly incoherent on the subject of this
weapon, describing it as the “arm of the rival.”
Regardless, it is a weapon of simple ferocity, and
if I understand these inscriptions correctly
possesses some sort of daemonic acidity or
capacity for corrosion.

Beau’s notes describe this

weapon as being forged from the tooth of a dead
god, and given its intensely sinister aura I cannot
fault them. Even proximity to the cell within
which it is stored seems to induce primal terror in
the soul.
 This appears to have
once been a simple and masterfully-crafted sword,
but its blade has been cracked and shattered by a
mighty blow. If Beau’s notes are to be believed,
this is a weapon incapable of harming the living,
which might even hold the blasphemous power to
resurrect the dead. For all that his writings speak
of its “compassion”, I find it hard to have much
faith in the kindness of a tool that radiates such
an intense and unnatural aura.
Miscellaneous Weapons
Inquisitor, there are rooms in this nightmare
place piled ceiling-high with swords. I have seen
halls with pistols and rifles in drifts. Cataloguing
this place will take lifetimes.
Psyker Sophistus’
Journal: I have seldom seen a weapon so
imbued with residual psychic energy.
This is a dagger of uncommon
balance and produced with great
skill, or so claims
Marktwelve, but merely
holding it instills panic and
terror, somehow.
We
initially believed that this beautiful
blade might have some historical value,
but it’s basically just a toy. Why did
Beau even bother collecting this gaudy
piece of junk?
Xenographer
Thripsus Reports: These
weapons are
unquestionably of Eldar
make. They are composed
of a ceramic material of
uncommon lightness, that
seems particularly well
designed to cut through fibrous
materials, like the woven
Wraithbone the Eldar are so fond
of employing. We have found two
of them thus far, and they are
clearly of a mirrored design, made to
be wielded together.
The joint system midway along the
blade is of particular interest- the
cutting edge can be extended, but
the two blades can also be unified
together into an immense pair of
shears.
 I have seen melee weapons
equipped with in-built stubbers or las weapons
before, and while they are an unusual concept
they certainly do not strike me as rare or exotic
enough to justify inclusion in Beau’s collection.
What is so important about these ones?
Part 2: Armour

Though weaponry has formed the lion’s share of
what we have recovered from the various caches
and musea on Animuu, we’ve also recovered a
number of suits of armour, clothing and other
garments whose capabilities, proven or otherwise,
simply beggar belief.
Xenographer
Thripsus Reports: “The significantly higher levels
of xenofibre in these more customized suits
greatly enhance the wearer’s latent abilities. Some
of them have been modified to be truly bizarre in
form- they look more like sporting clothing than
combat armour!”

Living Fibre
We have found dozens of these white uniforms,
made of varying mixes of mundane fabrics and a
curious psychoreactive semi-living fibre which
Thripsus says is derived from some form of Eldar
Wraithbone.

We’re unclear if these suits represent true Eldar

xenotech, or some form of human technology
upgraded with Eldar xenotech. Either way, they
come in a variety of grades.
We have only
These found a handful of this grade of armour, but they
contain a bare modicum of psychoreactive fibre, are potent weapons indeed, capable of shifting in
but the effects this abominable technology has on form to match the will of the wearer. What
the human form is remarkable- they grant the nightmarish fashion designer created such a work
wearer significantly enhanced resistance to of deadly couture?
damage, and seem to enhance their basic motor
skills.
 Xenographer
Thripsus Reports: “Alas, we couldn’t find a
physical example of one of these suits in Beau’s
collection. His notes establish that only three of
them were ever made, and that they were
effectively living clothing, beings of more than
human intelligence- no doubt some equivalent of
an Eldar Spirit Stone, but composed of fabric
rather than crystal. Somewhat disturbingly, he
claims that they were fed on human blood- I
don’t suspect a Chaotic influence, but this
certainly brings to mind the decadence of the late
Eldar Empire.”
Psycho-Photonic Armours
Psyker Sophistus’ Journal: “Tiny jars of crystalline
sand. ‘Twas all they seemed. And yet, they draw
the energies from within. They harden the light,
yes. The very soul! A suit of armour, the power to
protect and crush with a whim! And they glow,
with all the radiance of the spectrum! Would that
Exxhi would permit me to wear the Psycho-
Photonic Armour again, though she claims the
risk of the Dragon is too great.”

“Yes, the Dragon… for evil lurks in the hearts of

men. We gave a vial to one of the
Astropathic Chorus, and he went
mad with the power, his once-
elegant Photonic Armour becoming
twisted with spite and rage. These
vials… they carry the seed of an
ancient anger.”
Reaction Armour
When Techpriest Marktwelve saw this device,
she nearly blew a gasket- if I’m interpreting her
excited babbling correctly, this is a truly
venerable piece of Old Terran archaeotech,
hailing from a legendary group of Magii calling
themselves the Darpa.

Not only is it a suit of well-made power armour,

it incorporates a massively overpowered plasma
reactor, reaction control thrusters that permit
truly uncanny mobility, and some form of
wireless MIU connection that feeds targeting
data from the suit directly into the wearer’s brain.

One of the armsmen tried it on and literally knee-

slid through a structural bulkhead without
suffering a scratch. Maybe
Marktwelve’s excitement is
justified?

Symphonic Armour and Weaponry
V.A Beau was known for many things- his
insatiable lust for treasure, his ruthlessness, his
odd obsession with stuffed animals, but this… this
is something new and unfamiliar.
The “Symphonic Armour” cache is a series of
seven suits of armour apparently designed for use
by female wearers. Marktwelve holds that they
are of Human make, though the technology
involved is so advanced as to be nearly
incomprehensible to the layman, myself included.
Apparently they use the harmonic vibrations
generated by the human vocal structure to cause a
warp fusion reaction which generates
unbelievable power via a sort of oscillating
structural integrity field…?
But really, powered armour driven by singing?
 This suit’s golden-yellow heat dissipation vanes
hide a massive powerhouse of a weapon- every
punch or kick the wielder makes strikes with
force greater than a Power Fist. The curious
design of the arm and leg units let it act as a
piledriver- a weapon for the unskilled, maybe, but
devastating nonetheless.

From the Desk of V.A. Beau: “Beneath the pointed

green hat, an endless sea of scythes! Ah, two
hearts as one!”

Whoever designed this blue suit had a clear

obsession with their own skills as a
swordsmaster. Every part of it is sharp and
finely-balanced. Curiously, it seems to have
undergone several… revisions? Marktwelve
claims there is evidence that the weapon has
either been rebuilt or heavily upgraded numerous
times.
Compared to the Ivaldi, this purple and white
armour is fragile, ungainly and seems to have
little to no power output. However, it has the
capability to bend light about itself in a way that
is eerily similar to T’au stealthsuit technology.
From the Desk of V.A. Beau: “A child in a pink
miniskirt throwing circular saws everywhere!
How droll!”

This bloodred symphonic armour grants the

wielder the equivalent firepower of an entire
squad of Space Marines. It is quite fragile, though
it clearly packs a massive and very unsubtle
offensive punch.
Part 3: Equipment and
Wargear
Techpriest Marktwelve became exceedingly cross
with me when I referred to the vast majority of
Beau’s collection as “miscellaneous junk,” but the
fact remains that we have very little idea of what
any of these items do, and I certainly would not
feel comfortable testing them except under the
strictest conditions.
Operator Orbs
Psyker Sophistus’ Journal: We thought them
pocketwatches or mere baubles at first, but the
hexagrammatic engravings contained within
these devices are a marvel of complexity! I would
never have thought to incorporate runic
clockworks within an inscribed pattern such as
this. If the Psykana could duplicate these
devices…
Regardless, we have found orbs of several
apparent manufactures; there is enough variation
in their design and construction to make that
clear, though all share the same efficacy as
psychic foci. Their channeling of large-scale
telekinesis is particularly amusing.
Devices from the NMK Wing
The storage wing marked “NMK” seems to be
one of the oldest and most ornate in the facility,
decorated with fanciful motifs of dragons and
monkeys. There are relatively few weapons here,
but the other devices we have recovered are
remarkable in their power and strangeness.
We are… very unsure as
to what this object is, and if it is even an object. It
appears to be a coherent cloud of golden-yellow
smoke, intangible to the touch but otherwise
incapable of being dispersed or blown apart. It
was stored in a room with several pictograms or
images of human mutants with ape-like tails.
Lord Inquisitor, if we take
only one thing away from this wretched planet,
let it be these bizarre beans. We’ve found several
small servitor-tended gardens growing them; tests
revealed that they were non-toxic, so we fed one
to an armsman who immediately reported feeling
more hale and in better health than ever before.
We’ve yet to find them limit to injuries that they
cannot heal, though their taste and texture leave
much to be desired.
 We found
three of these mysterious objects in a highly
ornate temple at the center of the NMK wing.
They are orbs of a seemingly-impenetrable glassy
material, each with a star, or several stars,
inscribed at its center. Spheres marked 1, 4 and 5
are present, though the pedestal they rested on
had open slots for seven. We could detect no
supernatural or malign energy emissions from
them; why did Beau place so much importance in
these baubles?

Nearby, we found a handheld auspex apparently

tuned to locate these objects; the controls allow a
great deal of precision in registering their
location, though Marktwelve is unclear what sort
of energies it emits to detect them. We were able
to get faint returns for four more of the spheres;
the nearest seemed to be in the general direction
of the Far Corpse Stars.
These compact wearable
detection devices were present in relatively large
numbers. They seem refreshingly mundane in
functionality, able to relay a variety of useful data
to the wearer, and even detect and identify
psychic presence in humans. Techpriest
Marktwelve says their power supplies seem to be
of a fundamentally flawed and slightly dangerous
construction.
Techpriest Marktwelve Data Log: Surmised object
was a simple polearm, unclear why it was stored
with other miscellaneous NMK-wing objects.
Heavy-duty servitors unable to lift object; ref.
extremely high density profile. Diagrams and
picts stored nearby showed pole capable of
extending in length; how is unclear.

Techpriest Marktwleve Data Log: I am familiar

with the concept of spatial compression
technologies as employed by the Eldar and
Necrons, but these devices beggar belief. The
NMK wing is packed with miracles. Conjecture:
what could we accomplish if we could reproduce
this technology?
Yorha-Pattern Servopods
Techpriest Marktwelve Data Log: None of my
records indicate the existence of a Forge World
designate "Yorha." Servo-pods are functionally
similar to conventional servo-skull, but
demonstrate extreme level of sophistication; ref.
Eldar technology for micro-missile systems, high-
power compact agrav.
Yorha-Pattern Cognition Enhancers
Techpriest Marktwelve Data Log: I am torn by the
work of these techpriests of Yorha. Their
technologies are obviously sublime in
construction and skill, and yet they bear the
unmistakable hint of patterns and techniques I
would associate with the Silica Animus. These
cerebral implants, for instance, seem almost
designed to interface with a brain of artificial,
rather than biological construction.
Part 4: Stand Battles

We’re not quite sure what to make of the ancient,

ornate arrow we found atop a purple velvet
cushion in the depths of a long-forgotten storage
wing. It appears wholly mundane, though of
extraordinary age and craftsmanship. Sophistus
claims it possesses an aura that he will only
describe as “bizarre.”

Acquiring a Stand Stands in Combat

 Varieties of Stand

Choosing a Stand
 Stand Abilities

Stands and Damage

List of Stands
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Part 5: Martial Arts

Many of the books from Beau’s extensive

collection are neither heretical nor supernatural,
but simply refer to a vast array of strange and
exotic martial arts. Beau’s passion for combat is
quite striking, even if many of the examples
we’ve found seem… unfeasible.

Launcher

Dramatic Landing

Air Combo
Posing

Calling Attacks

Power Up!
But Wait, There’s More!