The Wind that Blew like Walking Ostriches

A Short Story
by Jane Doe

Dan Blacksmith looked at the magic rock in his hands and felt
sad.

He walked over to the window and reflected on his old-fashioned

surroundings. He had always loved pretty Newton Abbot with its
lively, lazy lakes. It was a place that encouraged his tendency to
feel sad.

Then he saw something in the distance, or rather someone. It was

the figure of Joshua Torrance. Joshua was a down to earth saint
with curvy legs and wobbly eyes.

Dan gulped. He glanced at his own reflection. He was a clumsy,

forgetful, whiskey drinker with handsome legs and feathery eyes.
His friends saw him as a grieving, good god. Once, he had even
helped a forgotten baby cross the road.

But not even a clumsy person who had once helped a forgotten
baby cross the road, was prepared for what Joshua had in store
today.

The wind blew like walking ostriches, making Dan sad.

As Dan stepped outside and Joshua came closer, he could see

the worried glint in his eye.

"I am here because I want a phone number," Joshua bellowed, in

a lovable tone. He slammed his fist against Dan's chest, with the
force of 3873 hamsters. "I frigging love you, Dan Blacksmith."

Dan looked back, even more sad and still fingering the magic
rock. "Joshua, you must think I was born yesterday," he replied.

They looked at each other with ecstatic feelings, like two tricky,
tiny tortoises cooking at a very violent bar mitzvah, which had R &
B music playing in the background and two snotty uncles partying
to the beat.

Suddenly, Joshua lunged forward and tried to punch Dan in the

face. Quickly, Dan grabbed the magic rock and brought it down
on Joshua's skull.
Joshua's curvy legs trembled and his wobbly eyes wobbled. He
looked stressed, his body raw like a kooky, klutzy knife.

Then he let out an agonising groan and collapsed onto the

ground. Moments later Joshua Torrance was dead.

Dan Blacksmith went back inside and made himself a nice glass
of whiskey.

THE END