Topic 2 – Relationship

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 Relationships
Friendship
Here are some c o m m o n collocations relating to friends and friendship.

collocation example comment

make friends W h e n you go to university you will m a k e N O T fm4 friends (a common student
a lot of new friends. error)
strike up a friendship Jack struck up a friendship with a girl = start a friendship
he met on holiday.
form/develop a Juliet f o r m e d a lasting friendship with N O T make a friendship
friendship the boy she sat next to at primary school.
cement7spoil a Spending several weeks on holiday cement = strengthen
friendship together has c e m e n t e d t h e i r friendship. spoil = have a bad effect on
a friendship grows We were at school together, but our grow = get stronger
friendship g r e w after we'd left school.
close/special friends I'm glad that our children are such close mutual friends = friends that you
mutual friends friends, aren't you? share with someone else
a casual 1 don't know Rod well. We're just casual = someone you k n o w a little
acquaintance acquaintances.
have a good Anna and Marie have a very g o o d N O T have a relation / relations with
relationship w i t h relationship.They love doing things
someone together.

keep in contact/ We must keep in c o n t a c t when the opposite = lose c o n t a c t / t o u c h

touch course ends.

M o r e t h a n just good friends

A love story

I fell madly in love with Anton from the moment I met him. It was certainly love at
first sight. I knew at once that he was the love of my life but at first I was not sure
if my love was returned or not. Within a few days, however, he had told me that he
was desperately in love with me too. A couple of weeks later, we realised that we
wanted to make a c o m m i t m e n t to each other and, when Anton asked me to marry
him, I immediately accepted his proposal. I'm sure we will always love each o t h e r
unconditionally 1 . Neither of us would ever consider having an affair 2 with someone
else.
1
love that is total and does not change regardless of what you or the object of your love does
2
have a sexual relationship with someone outside marriage

44 English Collocations in Use

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 Exercises

20.1 Look at A. Choose an appropriate word to complete each sentence.

1 Kay is quite a shy person and finds it hard to friends.
2 Do Paul and Sophie a good relationship?
3 Sam is always up friendships with people he meets on trains and planes.
4 I hope their disagreement over the bill w o n ' t their friendship.
5 It's amazing, when you meet someone new, how often you find that you have some
friends.
6 Apparently, people most of their closest friendships when they are young.
7 I wouldn't call G r a h a m a close friend, more a casual
8 We didn't really like each other at first, but our friendship as we got to
know each other better.
20.2 M a k e nine collocations out of the words in the b o x . Use each of the words once only.

a a a accept affair an at
commitment contact contact first friends
friendship have in keep lose make
love love proposal return sight
someone's special strike up

20.3 Answer these questions about the collocations on the opposite page.
1 Which verb suggests that friendship can be seen as a plant?
2 Which collocation suggests that love is close to being crazy?
3 Which collocation from the love story means agree to marry someone}
4 Which collocation means the same as special friends}
5 Which collocation means the same as keep in contact with}
20.4 Complete these questions. T h e n answer them.
1 Have you ever fallen in love at first ?
2 Do you think it's true that men are more reluctant to a c o m m i t m e n t than
women?
3 H o w old were you when you in love for the first time?
4 Do you think it is possible to have one person w h o is the love of your ?
5 Have you ever been in love with someone w h o has not your love?
6 Do you think that men or w o m e n are more likely to be tempted to an
affair?
20.5 Look up these words in your dictionary. N o t e d o w n t w o m o r e good collocations for
each one.
love friend friendship relationship

English Collocations in Use 45

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 Vocabulary
To get on well: to get along well

To have a lot in common

Example: Examiner: Do you see your friends very often?

Louisa: Yes … we meet up most weekends … we all get on really well and have a lot in common so we’re always
happy doing the same things and going to the same places

To enjoy each other’s company

To see eye to eye (with someone) (about someone or something): to agree about someone or something with
someone else

To fall out: to quarrel

Example: Examiner: What do you like about your close friends?

Anna: I think we enjoy each other’s company … we see eye-to-eye on most things so we rarelyfall out with each
other.

Strike up: to begin something, to cause something to happen (friendship, relationship…)

To get on like house on fire: (Informal): if two people get on like house on fire, they like each other very much and
become friends very quickly.

To go back years/to go way back

Example: Examiner: Have you known each other long?

Amy: Most of them yes … although my closest friend Carrie … we struck up a relationship at college and got on
like a house on fire … but yes … my other friendships go back years to when we were at school.

Part II speaking sample and vocab

To get to know

To keep in touch

To fall for: to fall in love with

Love at first sight

To hit it off: to get along well together, to quickly become good friends with someone

In a relationship:

Well matched: to be similar to

To pop the question (in certain contexts): to propose

To settle down

To be supportive

Part II: Describe a person you are very close to. You should say:

who this person is

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when you met them

where you met them

and say what it is about them you like so much.

Reiko: I’d like to talk about my boyfriend … Jose … we got to know each other at University almost 4 years ago …
we were in the same department … initially we were just good friends and used to go out in a group with our other
friends … when Jose went back to Spain for the holidays we would keep in touch with each other … then one year
he invited me to come to Spain with him … and that’s when we fell for each other I think … so you couldn’t really
say it was love at first sight as it had been over a year since we’d met … but we really hit it off and by the time we
got back to university in September we were able to tell all our friends that we were in a relationship … what do I
like about Jose … well he’s very kind … very funny … and very supportive … and we’re really well matched in
our interests … he hasn’t popped the question yet though … we’ve talked about getting married and I think we’re
both ready to settle down and have children … we’ll just have to wait and see …

Part III:

To have ups and downs: to have good times and bad times

Break up:

To work at a relationship: try to fix or to maintain a relationship with someone

Example: Examiner: Do you think marriage is still as important as ever?

Cristine: Yes … it certainly is in my country … I think the problem for some people is a lack of commitment … all
relationships have their ups and downs …. but some people prefer to break up rather than working at the
relationship

To tie the knot: to get married

To fall head over heels in love: to start to love someone a lot

Example: Examiner: What do you think is the ideal time to get married?
Terry: Personally … I think you should wait until you’ve found yourself first … decided if you want a career …
perhaps do some travelling … you should do this before tying the knot … although if you fall head over heels in
love plans like these can easily be forgotten.

To drift apart: to become less close to someone

To lose touch with: to not see or hear from someone any longer

Healthy relationship: a good, positive relationship

Example: Examiner: Is it important to keep in contact with our friends when we’re in a relationship?

Maria: Absolutely … it’s so easy to drift apart from your friends when you fall in love … but I think both partners
should try not to lose touch with their friends … that’s the best way to have a healthy relationship with your
partner.

Some other Vocab

Acquaintance

To Dump

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Ancestor – Descendant

Appretice to – Mentor of

Question Banks
Dating

 Can you tell us about your first date?

 What are some places you could go on a first date?
 Is it important to be punctual in your first date? Why?
 Is the first impression important?
 Would you dress up for a first date? What clothes would you wear?
 Is it important to give your partner a present? What for example?
 Is the place important? Why?
 What kind of place do you think is the ideal for a first date? Why do you think so?
 What things would you talk about on your first date?
 Would you share the bill? Or is it the man's role? Why?
 Would you behave formally or in these days it isn't necessary? Make your point.
 What type of restaurant would you rather go to?
 How are first dates different from later dates?

Love, dating & marriage

 About how many guests attended your wedding?

 How many guests would you invite to your wedding?
At what age do most people in your country get married?
At what age do you want to get married?
 At what age did you get married?
Describe a perfect date.
Describe the appearance of the person you would like to date?
Describe the character of the person you would like to date?
Do women usually work after getting married in your country?
Do you "go Dutch" when dating?
Do you know what it means to 'go Dutch'?
Is it usual for people in your country to 'go Dutch' if you go out together?
Do older girls/boys have a problem dating younger girls/boys?
 Do younger girls/boys have a problem dating older girls/boys?
Do you believe in love at first sight?
 Do you think some people know that they will fall in love with someone the first time they meet?
Do you know what a 'blind date' is?
Have you ever been on a blind date?
Did you ever arrange a blind date?
Do you drive or take the train when dating?
Do you get along with your in-laws?
Do you have a boyfriend/girlfriend?
 Where did you meet your him/her?
 What does he/she look like?
Do you know anyone who has had an arranged marriage?
Do you know someone who has gotten a divorce?
Do you know the difference between love and like?
 Can you still love your partner and not like him/her?
Do you think a boy should pay for everything on a date?
Do you think arranged marriages are a good idea? Why or why not?
 What is your opinion of arranged marriages?
Do you think fairy tales influence our choice of a partner?
Do you think getting married means giving up freedom?
Do you think if you get married that you will change?
Do you think it is better to be single or to be married?
Do you think it is good to get married?
Do you think it is okay for a couple to live together before getting married? Why or Why not?
Do you think it is okay to marry someone of a different race?

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 Do you think it is okay to marry someone with a different religion?
Do you think it's OK for a man to have two wives?
Do you think it's OK for a wife to have two husbands?
Do you think it's okay for a man to have a mistress?
Do you think it's okay for a man to hit his wife?
Do you think love is necessary to have a good marriage?
Do you think marriage is necessary?
Do you think marriages based on love are more successful than arranged marriages?
Do you think marriage is very stressful for women? How about for men?
Do you think people change after getting married?
Do you think religion influences marriage? If so, in what ways?
Do you think that all adults should be married?
Do you think that you can you find eternal love through the Internet?
Do you want a husband or wife who is older, younger or the same age as you?
Do you want to have children?
 If so, how many?
Have you ever been to a school dance?
Have you ever had a crush on someone?
Have you ever hated loving someone?
Have your parents ever disapproved of any of your relationships?
How long do you think couples should know each other before they get married?
How many children would you like to have?
How often would you like to go out on dates?
How old were you when you had your first boyfriend or girlfriend?
How old were you when you went on your first date?
 Where did you go?
 What did you do?
 Who did you go with?
How old were your parents when they got married?
If your husband or wife has an affair what would you do?
If your parents did not approve of a person you loved and wanted to marry, would that be a difficult situation for you? Why or why
not?
Is going out on dates important for you?
Is there a such thing as a perfect relationship for you?
If you could go out with anyone, who would it be?
If you are a man, and a woman asks you for a date, do you feel you should pay, or that the woman should pay?
If you had to marry either a poor man whom you really loved, or a rich man whom you did not love, which would you choose?
If you had to choose to live with someone who truly loves you but you don't love him back or to live alone for a rest of your life
loving someone that doesn't love you who would you choose?
What advice would you give to someone whose partner hates their best friend?
What age do you think is best for getting married?
What are some dating and marriage customs in your country?
What are some of the main reasons people get divorced?
What are some popular places to go on a date?
What are some qualities that you think are important in a spouse or partner?
What characteristics do you look for in a girlfriend or boyfriend?
What do you consider cheating in a dating relationship?
What do you like to talk about when on a date?
What do you look for in a girlfriend or a boyfriend?
What do you think most people talk about when dating?
What do you think of people who get divorced?
 Would you ever consider getting divorced?
What do you think of same-sex marriages?
What do you think of single mothers?
What is a wedding ceremony like in your country?
What is the best way to keep your spouse happy in the marriage?
What kind of boy or girl do you like?
What kind of clothes do you wear on a date?
What kind of man do you want as a husband?
What kind of person do you want to get married to?
What kind of woman do you want as a wife?
What makes a good husband/wife?
What makes a happy marriage?
 What do you think are some things that contribute to a successful marriage?
What qualities are important to you in a boyfriend or girlfriend?
What qualities in a partner are important to you?
What was the most boring date you've ever been on?
What was the most interesting date you've ever been on?
What would you consider "the perfect date" for you?
What would you do if your soon to be mother-in-law seems to hate you?
What would your parents think if you don't get married?
When did your parents get married?
Where do you want to go for your honeymoon?

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 Where did you go for your honeymoon?
Where do you want to go on your honeymoon?
Where is a good pace to go on a date in this town?
Where would you like to go on a date?
Which is more important for you, your job or your marriage?
Why do people break up with their partners?
Will you continue working after you get married?
Would you date someone you really liked if your parents did not like him or her?
Would you ever marry someone who has been divorced twice?
Would you introduce your date to your family?
Would you live with your parents after you get married?
Would you marry someone from another country?
Would you marry someone ten years older than you? How about ten years younger than you?
Would you marry someone that your parents didn't like?
Would you marry someone who couldn't speak the same language as you speak?
Would you mind if your boyfriend or girlfriend went out to party without you?
Would you prefer to go out with a quiet or a talkative person?
At what age do you think that dating should begin?
 Do you think there is any age when a person is too old to date?
Do you know a happily married couple?
Can you name a famous happily married couple?
What do you think is the most important ingredient in a good marriage?
How long is the marriage ceremony in your country?
Who designed the marriage covenant?
What do you think about dating a friend's ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend?
Does your first love still hold a special place in your heart?
 Do you believe that he or she will always have a special place in your heart?
What qualities do you look in your partner?
Do you think its possible to wait for the man or woman you love while he or she is in jail?
What is your definition of love?
Would you wait on a person you were dating for a long time if they joined the army?
 How about if they went to prison?
What is the best season to get married?
Do you know anybody who has two families at the same time and supports them both?
How many families can you have in your country?
Are there any superstitions on making someone fall in love with you?
 Have you heard of any successful "love potions?"
Have you ever returned a gift to your boyfriend or girlfriend and later find out that he has given it to his or her new mate?
Do you know of any superstitions connected with weddings?
Would it be important for you to have a "white wedding dress'?
Can you control your partner by playing games?
Why do you think the bride's maids wear white.
When should you introduce your boyfriend or girlfriend to your parents?
 When you begin dating
 After you have been together for a while
 Only when the relationship is serious?
 Why?
Do you like to have boy friend or girl friend in your school or in your classes?
Do you think it is right to continue seeing a person if he has not introduced you to his family yet?
In your opinion is marriage for life?
 Do you think when people get married it is really until death?
How long does it take for dating to become a relationship?
Is it important to be punctual in your first date? Why?
Would you dress up for a first date? What clothes would you wear?
What kind of place do you think is the ideal for a first date? Why do you think so?
What are your country's norms or laws on displays of public affection?
 Do you think it is okay for couples to kiss in public?
How would you feel if your boyfriend liked to keep company with a female friend when you're not there?
How would you feel if your girlfriend liked to keep company with a male friend when you're not there?
If you could go back to your past love, and change what went wrong, who would it be?
Who do you love?
If you had to choose to live with someone who truly loves you but you don't love him back or to live alone for a rest of your life
loving someone that doesn't love you what would you choose?
What would you change, if you are given only one chance to do it ?
Whose heart did you break most ? Did you apologize from him\her ?
Have you ever met someone you love a lot but never expressed it?
If your parents forced you to get married with a person who you don't love, what would you do in this situation?
If your boyfriend/girlfriend dated another person, then he/she wanted to return and date you, would you date again?
If your boyfriend/girlfriend dated your close friend, what would you do?
Do you believe that having a permanent love between two person who are living in two different countries is possible?
Do you want your husband to know how you looked as a child? Why or why not?

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 Do you believe in love at first sight or love after the first night?

International Marriage

 Would you marry someone of another nationality?

 Are your parents of the same nationality?
 What are some advantages of an international marriage?
 What are some disadvantages?
 Do you want to have an international marriage?
 Do you know anyone who married someone from a different country? If yes, what is their experience like?
 Do you think it is more difficult to marry someone from a different country?
 How would your parents feel if you married someone from a different country?
 Do you think that it is good for children to have parents from two different countries? Why? Why not?

The following question may be considered inappropriate in some situations.

 Do you think that gay people should be allowed to marry?

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Positive
get on like a house on fire = to get on really well with someone: "They get on
like a house on fire."

have a soft spot for someone = to be very fond of someone: "She has a soft
spot for her youngest child."

go back a long way = to know someone well for a long time: "Those two go
back a long way. They were at primary school together."

be in with = to have favoured status with someone: "She's in with the

management."

Negative
get off on the wrong foot with someone = to start off badly with someone:
"She really got off on the wrong foot with her new boss."

keep someone at arm's length = to keep someone at a distance: "I'm keeping

her at arm's length for the time being."

they're like cat and dog = to often argue with someone: "Those two are like cat
and dog."

rub someone up the wrong way = to irritate someone: "She really rubs her
sister up the wrong way."

be at loggerheads = to disagree strongly: "Charles and Henry are at

loggerheads over the new policy."

sworn enemies = to hate someone: "Those two are sworn enemies."

Equality and inequality

bend over backwards for someone = do everything possible to help someone:
"She bent over backwards for them when they first arrived in the town."

be at someone's beck and call = to always be ready to do what someone

wants: "As the office junior, she was at his beck and call all day."

pull your weight = to do the right amount of work: "The kids always pull their
weight around the house."

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do your fair share = to do your share of the work: "He never does his fair
share!"

take someone under your wing = to look after someone until they settle in: "He
took her under his wing for her first month at work."

keep tabs on someone = to watch someone carefully to check what they are
doing: "He's keeping tabs on the sales team at the moment."

wear the trousers = to be in control: "She wears the trousers in their

relationship."

be under the thumb = to be controlled by someone else: "He really keeps her
under the thumb."

How you communicate

get your wires crossed =to misunderstand someone because you think they
are talking about something else: "I think I've got my wires crossed. Were you
talking about car or personal insurance?"

get the wrong end of the stick = to misunderstand someone and understand
the opposite of what they are saying: "You've got the wrong end of the stick. The
fault was with the other driver, not with me."

be left in the dark = to be left without enough information: "We've been left in
the dark over this project. We haven't been told how to do it."

talk at cross purposes = when two people don't understand each other
because they are talking about two different things (but don't realise it): "We're
talking at cross purposes here."

go round in circles = to say the same things over and again, so never resolving
a problem: "We always end up going round in circles in these meetings."

leave things up in the air = to leave something undecided: "I hate leaving
things up in the air."

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 Relationships
(social - working - personal)
(Idioms, page 1 : birds of a feather → know someone inside out)

birds of a feather If two people are birds of a feather, they are very similar in
flock together many ways, so they naturally spend time together.
No wonder they get on well. They're birds of a feather!

build bridges If a person builds bridges between opposing groups, they help
them to cooperate and understand each other better.
A mediator is trying to build bridges between the local community
and the owners of the new plant.

cut loose If someone cuts loose or is cut loose, they stop being
influenced or controlled by another person or group.
He's thirty years old and still hasn't cut loose from his family.

see eye to eye with If you see eye to eye with somebody, you agree with them.
someone I'm glad we see eye to eye on the choice of colour scheme.

fair-weather friend Someone who acts as a friend when times are good, and is not
there when you are in trouble, is called a fair-weather friend.
I thought I could count on Bill, but I've discovered he's just a fair-
weather friend.

get on like a house Two people who get on like a house on fire have similar
on fire interests and quickly become good friends.
As soon as Sarah met her brother's girlfriend, they got on like a
house on fire.

get a raw deal If you say that some has got a raw deal, you think they have
been treated unfairly or badly.

go with the flow If you go with the flow, you follow the general tendency and go
along with whatever happens.
When my colleagues organise an office party, I just go with the flow.

good walls make This expression means that respecting one another's privacy
good neighbours helps create a good relationship between neighbours.
We try not to disturb the people next door. Good walls make good
neighbours!

play gooseberry If you play gooseberry, you join or accompany two people who
have a romantic relationship and want to be alone.
They invited me to join them but I didn't want to play gooseberry.

herding cats This expression refers to the difficulty of coordinating a

situation which involves people who all want to act
independently.
Organizing an outing for a group of people from different countries is

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 like herding cats!

be an item To say that two people are an item means that they are
involved in a romantic relationship.
So Sally and Harry are an item, are they?

know someone If you know someone inside out, you know them very well.
inside out Sue and Anne have been friends since childhood. They know each
other inside out.

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