Do vampires checking out girls, look for a juicy pair of jugulars?

Tai Chi looks like someone trying to find something in the dark.

Do you save on toilet paper by wearing 2 ply underwear?

If Mabylene can make eyelashes x4 longer, why aren’t they in the condom making business?

If you spray mosquito repellent on a mosquito, will it become lonely?

Are keep off the grass signs hypocritical or do they airlift them in?

Are baby grand pianos a result of reproductive organs?

If God was so concerned about masturbation, then why didn’t he pay more attention to arm length?

Smile like you farted and no one knows.

Are baby on board stickers real;ly telling everyone else that you’ve done it?

Would water polo be more interesting, if they threw a shark in the pool?

Have you bought a tin of Pringles that turned out to be tennis ball flavour?

Have you ever been straining on the toilet so hard, that when you had a power outage, you thought
that you’d burst your eye balls?

Do you like texting random numbers with “I’m outside?”

Are you so stupid that if you fell into a barrel of boobs, you’d be pulled out sucking your thumb?

Why is all together written separately and separately written all together?

When butterflies fall in love, do thy feel people in their stomachs?

When you see people in a flood crying on their roofs, do they know that they are making the
problem just a little bit worse?

Have you ever called out random names during sex and said that you were just thinking of baby
names out loud?

Have you ever licked the dentists finger when they were in your mouth?

How do you know feeling that your food crapped on their food?

When a porn actress is rude at a restaurant, is there anything that a waiter could put in her food that
would disgust her?

In back to the future they said that we’d have flying cars by 2015, but all we’ve managed to perfect,
is a blanket with sleeves?

Do you think they should rename pistachios to wood clams?

If you’re not supposed to abuse cough syrup, then why does it come with a shot glass?

Are you growing a moustache? I can hear the sound of one rubbing on the phone.

Do you know that you can turn anything into a boomerang, if you throw it upwards?

Is it that bad that you have to apologise to the toilet?

Lasagne is spaghetti flavour cake?

Uphill ten pin bowling?

Would you fund a study, to add a snooze button to roosters?

Is dried fruit Biltong for vegetarians?

Teeth that looks like one is photobombing the other.

Is marriage betting half your stuff, that you will love them forever?

Toasters are tanning salons for bread.

Is CPR kissing someone goodbye?

Tree house are insensitive. It’s like killing one of his friends and then getting him to hold him.

Are women natures rubix cube?

Why do they call it Tuna Fish, but not beef mammal or chicken bird?

Do you think that when an octopus learns to round house kick, the human race is done for?

Has it dawned on anyone, that we breathe in tree farts?

Is a sneeze a nose orgasm?

Pizzeria is what you get when you eat too much pizza?

Is your body a temple or a max security centre for fat?

The chinese millionaire cha ching.

If the pen is mightier than the sword, then why do actions speak louder than words?

Swear words are just sentence enhancers.

Do you walk away from auto flush toilets, like movie stars walking away from an explosion?

Do you think that your dog or cat see you as a wizard, because you can make it light and dark at the
flip of a switch?
If I overcook the food, will I lose weight, because I’ve already burnt the calories?

Spoons are little bowls on sticks.

Have you ever suffered whufflash? A fart so bad that it causes your head to snap back.

Dying of old age, is acute time poisoning.