Seminar 2.

Moral Concepts Viewed Cross-Culturally Issues for discussions

1. Friendliness vs. Friendship

Friendliness: One distinguishing characteristic of Americans is openness to

strangers. Practically everyone agrees that Americans are friendly. Very few
Americans care to put on snobbish airs, even if they secretly regard themselves
as far above the crowd. The President of the U.S.A. permanently emphasizes
what a regular guy he is. A college professor who goes fishing with plumbers
will boast about it; he too is one of the boys, not an intellectual in an ivory
tower.

Thus, the friendly "Hi" to whom-so-ever is a demonstration that Americans

subscribe to the code of democracy and the creed of equality. It's an
acknowledgement that whoever you are, you have rights. Foreigners find it
striking that on city streets, people will nod and smile to them. Not to say hello
to a neighbor is a breach of etiquette.

Friendly - Not Friends: Saying hello doesn't commit you to anything.

Friendliness should not be confused with friendship. Many foreigners slip up
here, and mistakenly think that that boundless cordiality means they're going to
have lots of friends. Then they become disillusioned and think Americans are
terribly superficial and shallow in their friendships. But most of the people
Americans refer to as "friends" are really acquaintances.

2. Compare Americans and the British. Who of them is universally perceived

as friendly, informal, easy-going.

From my experience, at first meeting, Americans tend to be more open,

friendly and outgoing, while Brits tend to be more reserved.

In public, for instance, most British people do not randomly chat with each
other at the grocery store, on the street or at restaurants and if someone (an
American or other) starts the conversation, they seemed almost shocked, as if
an giraffe just walked up to them.

However I don’t think this means that they are unfriendly or cold, because
often if you can break through that, the strangers can’t stop talking. I had an
experience at an airport baggage claim at a small London airport where my
husband talked to a stranger for more than an hour. I thought we were never
 going to leave. Everyone likes to talk and connect with each other, I think
culturally Americans are more used to it happening more often.

I was told more than once that Americans are generally positive and chipper
about everything while Brits are more cynical in general. When people ask you
how you are, Americans say “Great,” or even the less enthusiastic “fine.” while
Brits say “Can’t complain,” which means it is their best day ever.

After the first meeting, to me it feels like a lot of Americans’ general openness
and friendliness is superficial, if you called someone the next day for another
chat, they might not even remember you, it is just one of thousands of
interactions they have in their lifetime. But if you really connected with a
British person that is more meaningful and you could count them as one of
your true friends for life.

3. Which of the learned cultures are reserved, formal, tacit & friendly. Comment
on your answer. Give reasons.

4. Give arguments of different approaches to understanding

the concept of FRIENDSHIP: for Americans: an acquaintance = a friend; for

them three days of communication are enough to call a person a friend; for
Ukrainians – these are different concepts: acquaintance – ‘a short-time, not close
relationship’; friend - ‘a life-long close relationship’. Give examples to prove this.

5. Make notes of Ter-Minasova’s book The War and Peace of Languages &
Cultures. (in Rus. Война и мир языков и культур. М.: Астрель, 2017. 286 с.)

Discussing issues and writing projects on the following:

Americans give “a friend” a “loose” meaning as compared to Ukrainians. It is

quantitative rather than qualitative type of involvement.

“To have a steady boy/girl friend” is very important to Am. college students.
Relationships define sexuality, and so people who don’t have mates are assumed to be
homosexual or weird”. Prove that Ukrainian students think otherwise.

To have friends and mates means to be social & friendly. In contrast, it is not viewed
as weird not to have a lot of friends and dates in Ukraine. But if Americans have a
“true” friend, they call him/her a “best friend” or “close friend”. Write whether it is
true to fact.

Courtesy and respect. How can you account for the fact that in Ukraine a woman
expects a man to open the door for her, help her to put on a coat. Which are other
actions that a man should display towards a woman to mean ‘respect’. Americans not
doing so are considered as not courteous. American females consider these acts
disrespectful. They don’t want men to take care of them, they wish to be independent
and want respect not just because of their gender, but because they are valuable
members of society.

Give your arguments to support or reject such attitude

ndependence. Say if you agree to the following:

For Americans: self-governing, self-reliance, choice, respect of personal boundaries,

informality, security, self-determination, self-control, individual responsibility,
individual success, punctuality, friendliness.

For Ukrainians: involvement (close connection), hospitality, generosity, trust,

concern, sincerity, directness, intimacy, loyalty, emotional commitment, spontaneity,
flexibility, inner freedom for feeling and thoughts pertaining to morality