A Listen to a short interview with

Angela Dawson, a
communication coach based in
New York, about how to use
small talk and manage first
meetings.

First meetings in an international

business setting can often be
difficult.
Two strangers come together.
Often, they both have to speak a foreign language, English.
So you have strangers who aren't sure what to say to each other.
And they aren't sure how to say it.
The result is pretty predictable: a difficult silence.
Now, silence isn't necessarily bad.
In some cultures, silence is good; it's positive because it signals
respect.
But for me, if you want to get to know someone, to understand
them as a person and as a professional – which is essential for
doing business together – then silence is a risk, because you stop
this process.
If you want to learn about the other person, and build a
relationship, you need to ask questions.
And this is the real value of asking questions – you learn stuff
about the other person.
So …
Which questions do you ask?
I would say, in terms of style, keep it short and simple, just ask
simple starter questions.
If you are meeting a visitor, you can say things like, 'Did you have
a good trip?'
Is this your first time here?'
These kinds of questions are good because they allow an easy
answer, they're not too personal, but they can quickly break the
ice and get the conversation flowing.
You know, sometimes the specific questions don't really matter;
you just ask a question to get the ball rolling.
And then it's important to ask follow-up questions – if you don't,
small talk can feel very mechanical.
In terms of what you ask about in those first few minutes, I think
in business you need to have a mix of personal and work topics.
On the work side, asking about roles and responsibilities is good,
and the organisation behind the person, and where people work
and travel …
All these questions are easy to answer and give you useful
background.
And if you listen to what people tell you, you'll find more ideas for
other questions.
And all this asking questions, well, it builds understanding and in
the end … trust.
Remember, it's impossible to trust someone if you don't know
them well.
And how can you know them well?
You've got to ask questions!
Oh, one final thing: if possible, find something you have in
common with the other person – maybe you visited the same
place, you like the same food, the same music or sport.
When you and the other person have similar interests, the
conversation often goes better.
TAKE

OFFER

HAVE

TIME

WORK

JOIN

REPORT

FREE
 Tips for small talk in first meetings
a Give a clear and positive welcome.
Offer to take the other person's coat.
b
Ask about their journey to the office.
c
Offer them a drink.
d
Check if their hotel is OK.
e
Ask if it's their first time in the city.
f
Suggest going for dinner later in the evening
g
Ask where the other person works.
h
Check when they joined the company
i
Make a positive comment about working with them.
j

Answer the questions:

1 Why is managing first meetings in international business often difficult?

2 What is the value of asking questions?

3 Which types of question are most effective? Why?

4 What should you ask questions about?

Listening
B Listen again and answer the questions.
1 What two things does Angela say about silence?

2 Why does she say that some questions don't matter?

3What is the relationship between asking questions and building trust?