THE GOLDEN GIRLS

in

“Imposter Mr. Bean”

Written by: Ted Cruz

FADE IN:

INT. GOLDEN GIRLS LIVING ROOM - DAY

Blanche bursts into the living room, holding a cup of

coffee and a huge smile on her face.

BLANCHE

Girls, girls, you won't believe

what happened! I got a job as a
barista at the new coffee shop
down the street!

ROSE

Oh, that's wonderful, Blanche!

DOROTHY

A barista? Blanche, do you even

know how to make coffee?

BLANCHE

Of course I do! I'll have you

know that I make the best coffee
in town!

SOPHIA

(skeptical)

You? Making coffee? I'd like to

see that.

BLANCHE

(determined)

Well, you will! I start tomorrow

and I'm going to be the best damn
barista they've ever seen!

CUT TO:

INT. COFFEE SHOP - DAY

Blanche stands behind the counter, nervously fidgeting with

her apron. A customer approaches.

CUSTOMER

Hi, can I get a grande soy latte,

extra hot?
Blanche stares at the espresso machine in front of her,
unsure of what to do.

CUSTOMER

(impatiently)

Hello?

BLANCHE

(flustered)

Oh, sorry! I'm new here. Let me

just...figure this out.

Blanche starts pushing buttons on the espresso machine,

trying to remember the instructions she was given during
training.

CUSTOMER

(annoyed)

Can't you do this any faster?

Blanche accidentally sprays milk all over the counter.

BLANCHE:

(frustrated)

Oh, for Pete's sake!

Fade in:
EXT. MIAMI STREET - DAY
People bustle around the busy street, all going about their
business. Suddenly, a strange figure comes into view. It's
a man in a tattered and oversized suit jacket, walking with
an awkward gait. As he gets closer, we see that he has long
yellow nails peeking out from under his sleeves. This is
the Imposter Mr. Bean. The imposter Mr. Bean is a grotesque
version of the Mr. Bean character, with a thin, wiry frame
and sunken cheeks that give his face a skeletal appearance.
His pale skin is stretched tightly over his bones, and his
piercing yellow eyes seem to glow in the darkness. He wears
a tattered tweed suit that hangs off his emaciated frame,
and his hair is wild and unkempt, sticking up in every
direction like a nest of vipers. His long, bony fingers are
like claws, and his nails are overgrown and yellowed. His
lips curl into a menacing grin, revealing a set of crooked,
yellow teeth that seem almost too large for his mouth.

INT. COFFEE SHOP - DAY

The Imposter Bean enters a crowded coffee shop and
approaches the counter. The barista, BLANCHE, takes one
look at his gnarled hands and recoils.

BLANCHE
Jesus, Mary and Joseph. (She
recollects herself) Hey, honey. I
haven’t seen that much tweed since
my third wedding! What can I get
for you?
IMPOSTER BEAN
(smiling, revealing his sharp
teeth) A latte, please.

Blanche’s mouth falls open, but she quickly recovers and

makes the drink, knocking over many bottles and cups of hot
coffee in the process, all the whole keeping a wary eye on
the strange customer. The Imposter Bean takes his latte and
heads home.

FADE TO BLACK.

INT. IMPERSONATED MR. BEAN'S APARTMENT - NIGHT

The Imposter Bean returns to his apartment, which is filled
with bizarre objects and odd trinkets. He sits down at a
desk covered in papers and begins to sketch a new creation.

As he works, we see that his sketches are grotesque and

disturbing. He's creating a world of horrors that only he
can imagine.

Fade out.

INT. LIVING ROOM - DAY

The Golden Girls are sitting in the living room, watching

TV.

DOROTHY
What are you watching, Ma?

SOPHIA
A rerun of The Price is Right. I
love that show.

BLANCHE bursts into the room, looking frazzled.

BLANCHE
Girls, you won't believe what
happened at work today!

ROSE
 What is it, Blanche?

BLANCHE
I saw the scariest man at the
coffee shop. He looked just like
Mr. Bean… but somehow it wasn't
him.

SOPHIA
(sarcastic)
Oh great, another Mr. Bean. Just
what we needed.

ROSE
(nodding)
I’ve always said, one Mr. Bean
isn't enough.

BLANCHE
I’m being serious, girls! He was
so… Cold. He kept staring at me,
and his eyes were so… cold.

DOROTHY
(concerned)
Well, Blanche, if you're really
scared, maybe you should call the
police.

BLANCHE
(nodding)
Maybe I will. I just hope this
imposter Mr. Bean doesn't show up
again.

SOPHIA
(smiling)
Don't worry, Blanche. We'll
protect you.

ROSE
(nodding)
Yeah, we'll make sure you're safe.

The Golden Girls group hug, then suddenly the TV switches

on.

Chapter Title: Interview with an Imposter

Fade in:

INT. TELEVISION STUDIO - DAY

A well-dressed reporter sits across from the Imposter Bean,
who is wearing his usual tattered suit jacket and has his
long yellow nails on full display. The studio is silent,
waiting for the interview to begin.

REPORTER

Thank you for joining us. Today,

our guest is a man who claims he
is Mr. Bean. But can we trust him?
You decide. (The reporter turns to
the imposter Mr. Bean) Can you
tell us a little about yourself?

IMPOSTER BEAN

(smiling, revealing his sharp

teeth) Of course. I'm an artist, a
creator of worlds. I see beauty
where others see only ugliness.

REPORTER

Some have described your work as

grotesque and disturbing. What do
you say to those criticisms?

IMPOSTER BEAN

(leaning forward) My work is not

for the faint of heart. It's meant
to challenge and provoke. Those
who can't handle it simply lack
the imagination to see beyond the
surface.

REPORTER

You're often compared to the real

Mr. Bean. How do you feel about
that?

IMPOSTER BEAN

(a long silence, then, laughing.)

A pale imitation of true genius.

REPORTER:

And what about your appearance?

The long nails, the sharp teeth?
IMPOSTER BEAN only smiles, showing his long, sharp teeth
like knives.
REPORTER:

And what do you say to those who

find your appearance unsettling?

IMPOSTER BEAN:

(shrugging) They're entitled to

their opinion. (He crosses his
hands, his long yellow claws
coming together in a slow and
menacing way)

IMPOSTER BEAN continues to speak, but the Imposter Bean's

unsettling presence begins to weigh on the reporter. It's
clear that there's something more to this strange figure
than meets the eye. There is a crescendo of loud noise
until suddenly we cut to:

INT. GOLDEN GIRLS LIVING ROOM - DAY

Blanche is sitting on the couch, nervously tapping her

foot. The other girls are gathered around her, watching the
interview on TV.

REPORTER

And how do we know you're the real

Mr. Bean?

IMPOSTER BEAN

(smiling)

You don't. But does it really

matter? My art speaks for itself.

DOROTHY

(skeptical)

This guy gives me the creeps.

SOPHIA

(nodding)

We've already got a real Mr. Bean,

and he doesn't look like he
crawled out of a horror movie!
 BLANCHE

(worried)

Do you think he's dangerous?

ROSE

(shaking her head)

I don't know, but I wouldn't want

to be alone in a room with him.

Suddenly, the Imposter Bean's smile fades and his eyes grow
dark.

IMPOSTER BEAN

(voice low and menacing)

You think you know me, ROSE, but

you don't. I am not to be trifled
with.

The Golden Girls all jump at his sudden change in demeanor.

DOROTHY

(turning off the TV)

That's enough of that. Blanche, we

were just about to sit down for a
game of Scrabble. Care to join?

BLANCHE

(nervously)

Right, Scrabble.

The girls gather around Blanche, offering words of

encouragement and support. As the camera fades out, we hear
the sound of the Imposter Bean's laughter echoing in the
background.

Chapter Title: Love in the Time of Bean

EXT. COFFEE SHOP - DAY

JEN, played by Jennifer Aniston, sits at a table, sipping

her coffee and flipping through a magazine. Suddenly, a
tall figure wearing an oversized suit jacket approaches
her. It's the Imposter Bean, with his long yellow nails and
knives for teeth.
 IMPOSTER BEAN

(in his nasally voice) Hello

there.

JEN

(surprised but intrigued) Hi.

IMPOSTER BEAN

(sitting down across from her) You

seem like a woman of refined
taste. What's your opinion on the
avant-garde?

JEN
(smiling) I'm open to anything.

The Imposter Bean proceeds to charm Jen with his quirky,

offbeat humor and unconventional viewpoints. They spend the
rest of the afternoon talking and laughing, oblivious to
the shocked stares of onlookers.

FADE IN:

EXT. JEN'S HOUSE - DAY

Jen is standing outside her house with her boyfriend, the
Imposter Bean. They're holding hands and smiling, but
there's tension in the air.

JEN
(to Bean) My family and friends
aren't going to be happy about
you.
IMPOSTER BEAN
(defensive) Why not? I love you,
and that's all that should matter.
JEN
(frustrated)They think you're an
imposter, Bean. They think you're
just pretending to be the real
Bean.
IMPOSTER BEAN
(voice flat, angry) I am the real
Bean. I just look a little
different now.
JEN
(calming him down) I know that,
but they don't. They're going to
be asking you all sorts of
 questions, and I don't know if I
can handle it.
IMPOSTER BEAN
(determined) I'll do whatever it
takes to prove myself to them. I
love you, Jen, and I'm not going
to let anyone stand in the way of
our love.

Suddenly, a group of people emerge from the house,

including Jen's parents and friends. They're all giving
Bean suspicious looks.

JEN'S DAD
(skeptical) Who is this guy, Jen?
JEN'S FRIEND
(mocking) Yeah, where did you find
him? The circus?
IMPOSTER BEAN
(standing tall) My name is Mr.
Bean, and I love your daughter. I
know there have been rumors about
me, but I assure you, I'm the real
deal.

He suddenly begins to glow with an otherworldly light.

Everyone is frozen in fear as Bean's eyes begin to glow,
and a dark energy emanates from him.

JEN

(screaming)

Mr. Bean, what's happening?!

IMPOSTER BEAN

(smiling, sinister)

You foolish mortals. Did you

really think I was just a man? I
am so much more than that.

With a wave of his hand, Bean erases the memories of Jen's

family and friends. They stare blankly ahead, with no
memory of who they are or who Bean is.

JEN

(horrified)

What did you do to them?!

IMPOSTER BEAN
 (smiling, sinister)

I've simply given them the gift of

forgetting. Now, let's go, my
love. We must not forget about
ROSE.

Bean and Jen walk away. Mr. Bean snaps his fingers, and JEN
loses her memory as well. They continue down the street,
leaving behind a group of confused and frightened people.
The camera lingers on their blank faces, as we hear the
sound of Bean's maniacal laughter in the distance.

FADE OUT.

FADE IN:

EXT. BUSY CITY STREET - DAY

Jen and the Imposter Bean are walking hand in hand on a
crowded street. They pause in front of a store window,
gazing at their reflections.

JEN
(smiling)
You know, I never thought I'd fall
in love with someone so different
from me.
IMPOSTER BEAN
(looking at her, angry. Violent.)
Different? You mean because you
think I'm an imposter?
JEN
(shaking her head)
No, not that. We come from such
different worlds, and yet...I feel
like we were meant to find each
other.
IMPOSTER BEAN
(smiling)
Me too.

They turn to face each other, their eyes locked in a moment

of love and understanding.

JEN
(whispering)
I don't care what anyone else
thinks. I love you.
IMPOSTER BEAN
(whispering back)
And I love you.
Suddenly, a group of people walk by, staring at them with
disapproving looks. Jen's face falls, but the Imposter Bean
squeezes her hand.

IMPOSTER BEAN
(firmly)
Don't let them get to you. Our
love is stronger than their
expectations.

Jen nods, feeling emboldened by his words. She takes a step

forward and wraps her arms around him, pulling him into a
tight embrace.

JEN
(smiling through tears)
You're right. We're meant to be
together.

IMPOSTER BEAN
(smiling back)
Always.

They hold each other tightly as the busy city street

bustles around them, knowing that their love is stronger
than any societal expectations or physical differences.
Behind JEN’s back, Eldritch monsters appear in sewer drains
to pull the disapproving onlookers into a horrific demise.

JEN
(smiling) I'm having such a great
time tonight.

Fade out.

FADE IN:

INT. HOSPITAL ROOM - DAY

Jen is lying in a hospital bed, holding her newborn baby.

The Imposter Bean is standing beside her, beaming with
pride.

IMP. BEAN
(voice trembling with
emotion)
Look at our baby, Jen. She's
beautiful.
Jen looks at the baby, who has long yellow fingernails and
an oversized suit jacket. She stares at the baby, her
expression uncertain.

JEN
(whispering)
She's... different.

IMP. BEAN
(grinning)
That's what makes her special.

Jen looks at the Imposter Bean, who is radiating joy and

love. She realizes that the baby is a part of him, and she
cannot help but love it.

JEN
(smiling)
You're right. She's perfect.

The Imposter Bean kisses Jen on the forehead, and they both
look at their baby, their faces filled with love and
acceptance.

CUT TO:

INT. LIVING ROOM OF GOLDEN GIRLS' HOUSE - DAY

The Golden Girls, BLANCHE, ROSE, DOROTHY, and SOPHIA, are

gathered around the coffee table, playing a heated game of
Scrabble.

BLANCHE

(placing her tiles down on the

board) S-E-X-Y, that's 15 points.
Beat that, girls!

ROSE

(laughs) Blanche, you always

manage to find a way to make this
game saucy.

DOROTHY

(rolling her eyes) Can we please

focus on the game? I have a
triple-word score opportunity.

Suddenly, the television interrupts their game with an

emergency broadcast signal.
 EMERGENCY BROADCAST ANNOUNCER (V.O.)

This is an emergency broadcast.

Please stand by for an important
message.

The girls exchange worried glances as the broadcast

continues.

INT. NEWSROOM - DAY

The news anchor, KATE, sits at her desk, looking serious.
KATE
Good afternoon. Our top story
today: We have just received
footage of an imposter claiming to
be Mr. Bean.

Cut to footage of the Imposter Bean, sitting in a dimly lit

room. You can see his long, yellow nails and sharp teeth
glint in the dim lighting. There is a loud static hum that
fills the room.

IMPOSTER BEAN
Hello, world. I am the real Mr.
Bean.

Cut back to Kate in the newsroom.

KATE
We do not have any information
about this imposter or their
intentions at this time. We will
bring you more updates as we get
them.

Cut back to the Golden Girls’ living room. Everyone’s mouth

is agape.

BLANCHE

What on earth did we just see?

DOROTHY

It’s like I could feel him inside

my head.

ROSE

Just who was that man?

SOPHIA
 This world gets crazier every day.

DOROTHY

We have to keep an eye on this.

Who knows what kind of trouble
this imposter could cause.

BLANCHE

Maybe we should call the police

and let them know what we just
saw.

SOPHIA

Or maybe we should just keep

playing Scrabble and forget about
this whole thing.

DOROTHY

Ma, this is serious. We need to

stay informed and be aware of any
potential danger.

The girls exchange worried glances, unsure of what to do

next.

FADE OUT.

Chapter Title: "Love in Disguise"

FADE IN:

EXT. STUDIO SET - DAY

The set is filled with colorful lights and cameras, as RYAN

SEACREST stands in the center, microphone in hand.

RYAN SEACREST
(voiceover)
Welcome to "Mr. Bean Love
Connection", the only show where
love is in disguise.

Cut to:

INT. CONTROL ROOM - DAY

A group of PRODUCERS sit in front of a series of monitors,

watching the show as it unfolds.

PRODUCER 1
 These contestants are hilarious! I
can't wait to see how this all
ends.

PRODUCER 2

I just hope nobody falls in love

with the imposter Mr. Bean again.
I refuse to clean up another blood
sacrifice.

Cut to:

INT. BACKSTAGE - DAY

A group of MR. BEAN LOOK-ALIKES anxiously wait for their

turn on the show. They are all wearing advanced augmented
reality technology that allows them to appear as Mr. Bean
to their blind dates.

MR. BEAN CONTESTANT 1

I can't believe I'm doing this.

It's insane!

MR. BEAN CONTESTANT 2

(relaxing)
Oh, come on, it's just a bit of
fun. Besides, who wouldn't want to
go on a date with Mr. Bean? Find
out who you REALLY love. Not
something shallow.

Cut to:

EXT. BEACH - DAY

The Mr. Bean contestants arrive at the beach, all dressed

in Mr. Bean's trademark tweed suit and carrying picnic
baskets. They are greeted by their blind dates, who are
also disguised as Mr. Bean.

MR. BEAN CONTESTANT 3

Wow, you look amazing.

MR. BEAN CONTESTANT 4

 (smiling)
Thank you, you don't look too bad
yourself.

Cut to:

INT. CONTROL ROOM - DAY

The producers watch as the contestants enjoy their beach

date, filled with hilarious mishaps.

PRODUCER 1

This is pure gold. I love it!

PRODUCER 2

(skeptical)
I don't know, what if they don't
find each other attractive once
the disguises come off?

Cut to:

INT. STUDIO SET - DAY

Ryan Seacrest interviews the contestants after their dates,

asking them about their experiences.

RYAN SEACREST

So, what did you think of your

blind date?

MR. BEAN CONTESTANT 5

(laughing)
Well, I have to say, it was a bit
weird dating someone dressed as
Mr. Bean. But once we got past the
initial shock, we had a great
time.

RYAN SEACREST

(smiling)
That's what it's all about, folks.
Finding love in unexpected places.

Cut to:

INT. BACKSTAGE - DAY

The contestants wait anxiously for the moment when their
disguises will be removed.

MR. BEAN CONTESTANT 6

I'm really nervous about this.

What if she doesn't like what she
sees?

MR. BEAN CONTESTANT 7

Don't worry, man. If she doesn't

like you for who you are, then
she's not worth it.

Cut to:

INT. STUDIO SET - DAY

Ryan Seacrest stands in front of the contestants, who are

now unmasked and revealed to be themselves.

RYAN SEACREST

Congratulations, contestants!
You've made it to the end of the
show. But now comes the moment of
truth. Are you ready to reveal
your true identities?

The contestants nod nervously.

RYAN SEACREST

All right then, let's do this.

One by one, the contestants reveal their faces to their

blind dates. Some are met with cheers and excitement,

CUT TO:

INT. IMPOSTER MR. BEAN'S HOME - NIGHT

Imposter Mr. Bean sits on his couch, scrolling through

channels on his TV. He stumbles upon "Mr. Bean Love
Connection" and scoffs at the concept, but something keeps
him watching.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(to himself)
 This is ridiculous. Why am I even
watching this?

As the show progresses, he finds himself drawn to the fake

Mr. Bean and the charisma he exudes. Unbeknownst to him,
it's actually Ryan Seacrest in disguise.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

I guess I need to get on set and
see what this show is really all
about.

FADE IN:
EXT. TV STUDIO - DAY

A large TV studio with a banner that reads "THE MR. BEAN

DATING SHOW." Crowds of people are dressed up as Mr. Bean
and are waiting eagerly outside.

INT. STUDIO - DAY

A stage with three doors and a giant screen with a digital

Mr. Bean face. Ryan Seacrest, the host, stands in front of
the screen with a microphone.

RYAN SEACREST
Welcome to the Mr. Bean Dating
Show! Today, our contestants will
be going on blind dates with each
other, all disguised as the
legendary Mr. Bean using our
advanced augmented reality
technology.

The first door opens, and a Mr. Bean contestant comes out,
followed by another from the second door, and so on until
there are six Mr. Beans on stage.

RYAN SEACREST
Contestants, are you ready to meet
your Mr. Bean matches? The six Mr.
Beans nervously nod.

RYAN SEACREST
Well, let's get started!

The screen shows the first pair of Mr. Beans sitting down
at a restaurant table, their AR disguises making them look
like Mr. Bean. The cameras show each Mr. Bean's point of
view, giving the impression that they are all sitting
across from Mr. Bean himself.
 MR. BEAN 1
So, do you like tea?

MR. BEAN 2
(smiling) Oh, I do love a good cup
of tea.

The camera cuts to the other Mr. Bean contestants, all

watching the dates unfold on a monitor backstage.

MR. BEAN 4
I hope my date likes tea. I hate
coffee.

The dates continue, with the Mr. Beans discovering more

about each other and their likes and dislikes. At the end
of each date, they rate their experience on a scale of one
to ten. The final date concludes, and the contestants all
return to the stage.

RYAN SEACREST
And now, it's time for the moment
of truth. Will love bloom for one
of our Mr. Beans?

The contestants hold up their scorecards, revealing their

ratings of each date. The audience and other Mr. Beans
cheer as two contestants emerge with the highest scores.

RYAN SEACREST
Congratulations to our top Mr.
Beans! You'll be heading on a
romantic getaway for two, all
expenses paid.

The two Mr. Beans grin and hug, their AR disguises morphing
back into their true appearances.

RYAN SEACREST
Thanks for tuning in to the Mr.
Bean Dating Show! Join us next
time for another exciting episode.

Suddenly, one of the "Mr. Bean" contestants stands out - he

has long yellow nails that peek out from under his tattered
and oversized suit jacket, and sharp teeth. The other
contestants and their dates scream and run out of the room
in fear. The imposter Mr. Bean is revealed to the audience,
who gasps in shock.

RYAN SEACREST
 (As if hypnotized) We have a
winner, folks! Congratulations to
our imposter Mr. Bean!

The imposter Mr. Bean stands triumphantly on the stage, as

the audience cheers and the other contestants look on in
horror. The screen begins to warp and we see tears in
reality beginning to form.

CUT TO:

INT. TV STUDIO - DAY

Ryan Seacrest steals one of the AR sets, sneaks into a

janitor’s closet and disguises himself as Mr. Bean. He
stands on the set of "Mr. Bean Love Connection" as the
contestants mingle around him, unaware that he is actually
the host, famous man Ryan Seacrest. He glances over at the
Imposter Mr. Bean, who is being shown around set by a
producer for the show. He feels a strange attraction
towards him.

RYAN SEACREST
(to himself)
What's happening to me? I can't
seriously be falling for another
man.

He tries to push the feeling aside and focuses on hosting

the show.

FADE IN:
EXT. COFFEE SHOP - NIGHT

The Imposter Mr. Bean is waiting outside the coffee shop,

nervously checking his phone. BLANCHE can be seen inside.
Having broken the latte maker, there is a violent stream of
latte shooting all over the coffee shop. People are running
out of the store. One of those people is Ryan Seacrest who
approaches Imposter Mr. Bean. Ryan is dressed in a Mr. Bean
AR costume.

RYAN SEACREST
Hi there! You must be Mr. Bean!

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(smiling)
Yes, that's me! And you must be my
blind date.
RYAN SEACREST
(smiling)
 That's right. It's great to
finally meet you in person.

They walk into the coffee shop together and sit down at a
table.

RYAN SEACREST
So, tell me about yourself, Mr.
Bean.
IMPOSTER MR. BEAN
(smiling)
Well, I'm a big fan of Mr. Bean,
obviously. I love to watch his
videos—err, your videos and
imitate his mannerisms. And I have
some... unique hobbies.

The Imposter Mr. Bean places his hand on Ryan’s, still

disguised as Mr. Bean, but an unprepared Ryan Seacrest
quickly pushes his hand away and stands up from the table.
IMPOSTER MR. BEAN throws his hot latte all over RYAN
SEACREST. Ryan begins to cry and rushes out of the coffee
shop. The Imposter Mr. Bean watches him leave, grinning
with satisfaction.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(to himself)
Another victim to my Eldritch
Powers.

The Imposter Mr. Bean cackles to himself as the screen

fades to black.

FADE OUT.

CUT TO:

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN’S HOME - LATER

IMPOSTER MR BEAN sits in his living room, deep in thought.

Suddenly, there's a knock at the door. He opens it to find
Ryan Seacrest standing on his doorstep, no longer disguised
as Mr. Bean. The Imposter Mr. Bean looks at his
latte-stained clothes and realizes it’s the same man he
just went on a date with.

IMP BEAN
(surprised)
So you're not Mr. Bean, after
all.

RYAN SEACREST
 (apologetic)
No, I'm not. I'm sorry for
deceiving you.

IMP BEAN
(confused)
Then why did you pretend to be
him?

RYAN SEACREST
(hesitant)
Because...I was attracted to you.
And I didn't know how else to get
close to you.

Imposter Bean is taken aback, but also intrigued.

IMP BEAN
(curious)
Are you saying that you have
feelings for me?

RYAN SEACREST
(nodding)
Yes. But I understand if you can't
reciprocate them.

IMP BEAN takes a moment to consider this before stepping

closer to Ryan Seacrest and kissing him.

FADE IN:

EXT. BEACH - DAY

Ryan Seacrest and the Imposter Mr. Bean walk along the
beach, hand in hand, enjoying the sunset.

RYAN SEACREST
(looking at the Imposter Mr. Bean)
I need to tell you something.
IMPOSTER MR. BEAN
(looks at Ryan Seacrest)
What is it?
RYAN SEACREST
(voice trembling)
I...I think I'm in love with you.
And I’m not content to just… be
friends.

The Imposter Mr. Bean looks surprised and taken aback.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

 (stunned)
What?
RYAN SEACREST
(sincere)
I know it sounds crazy, but ever
since I met you, I can't stop
thinking about you. You're kind,
funny, and smart, and I feel like
I can be myself around you.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(processing)
I don't know what to say.

RYAN SEACREST
(takes a step closer)

Just say you feel the same way.

The Imposter Mr. Bean looks at Ryan Seacrest, searching his

eyes for any doubt or hesitation. He sees none, and a small
smile begins to form on his lips.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(sincere)
I do.

Ryan Seacrest's face lights up, and he leans in to kiss the

Imposter Mr. Bean. They share a brief but passionate kiss,
the ocean waves crashing in the background.

RYAN SEACREST
(pulls back, smiling)
I've been wanting to do that for
so long.
IMPOSTER MR. BEAN
(smiling back)
Me too.

They hug each other tightly, feeling a sense of comfort and

belonging that they've never experienced before.

CUT TO:

INT. JEN'S APARTMENT - DAY

Jen and Ryan stand on opposite sides of the room, glaring at each
other with a mix of jealousy and disdain.

JEN
 You think you're so great, with your
fancy suits and your perfect hair.

Ryan chuckles condescendingly.

RYAN

And you think you're so much better just

because you were once married to a famous
actor?

Jen narrows her eyes.

JEN

I didn't say that. But at least I don't

go around kissing imposters.

Ryan bristles at the insult.

RYAN

What are you talking about? You literally

married him. He’s just a big pretender.

Imposter Mr. Bean winces. Jen's face flushes with anger.

JEN

He's not pretending, he's acting. And at

least he's not a phony like you, using a
fake Mr. Bean disguise to manipulate
people.

Ryan's jaw tightens.

RYAN

I'm not manipulating anyone. I genuinely

care for him.

Jen stands with her arms crossed, facing Ryan and Imposter Mr.
Bean. Ryan looks uneasy, while Imposter Mr. Bean fidgets with his
hands.

JEN

(sarcastically)
 Sure you do. Just like you cared for
Julianne Hough, right?

RYAN winces at the mention of his past relationship with Julianne

Hough.

RYAN

(defensively)
That's not fair.

JEN
(coldly)
Life's not fair. But you're welcome to
keep chasing after your Mr. Bean
imposters. I'm done with both of you.

Jen turns and storms out of the room, leaving Ryan and Imposter
Mr. Bean alone.

RYAN
(to Imposter Mr. Bean)
Well, that went well.

Imposter Mr. Bean looks down, feeling guilty.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(sadly)
I didn't mean to hurt anyone.

RYAN
(rolling his eyes)
And I bet you didn't mean to lead me on
either, did you?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(defensively)
I didn't know what I wanted. I still
don't.

RYAN
(exasperated)
Well, you better figure it out soon. Jen
and I aren't going to wait around
forever.

Suddenly, Jen bursts back into the room.

 JEN

(interrupting)
I couldn't leave without telling you
something.

Imposter Mr. Bean looks at her expectantly, while Ryan takes a

step back, knowing he's been rejected.

JEN

(emotional)
I know we've had our problems, but I
still care about you. Seeing you with
Ryan... it hurt. But I can't deny how I
feel.

Imposter Mr. Bean looks at her, conflicted.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(unsure)
Jen, I... I don't know what to say.

Jen takes a step back, hurt and disappointed.

JEN
(resigned)
You don't have to say anything. I just
wanted to let you know how I feel.

Imposter Mr. Bean takes a deep breath and steps forward.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(hesitant)
Jen, I do care about you. You’re the
mother of my child. But I can't ignore
the feelings I have for Ryan. I think...
I think I love him.

Jen looks shocked and hurt, but she nods and takes a step back.

JEN

(emotional)
I understand. I just hope you know what
you're doing.
Imposter Mr. Bean nods, looking at Ryan.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(apologetic)
Ryan, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to hurt
you.

Ryan nods, trying to hide his disappointment.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(voice trembling)
I'm sorry, Jen, Ryan. I have to be honest
with both of you. I don't know what I
want right now.

RYAN
(eyes wide)
What's going on?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(sighing)
I need time to figure out who I am and
what I want. And I don't want to hurt
either of you in the process. So I think
it's best if we break up.

RYAN
(disappointed)
Break up?

JEN
(teary-eyed)
You mean with both of us?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(nodding)
I don't want to choose between you. And I
don't want to hurt you by leading you on.

RYAN
(understandingly)
I see. I respect your decision.

JEN
(wiping her tears)
 Me too. But it doesn't make it any less
painful.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(sympathetically)
I know. And I'm sorry for that. But I
need to do what's best for me right now.

JEN
(nodding)
We understand.

RYAN
(sadly)
Yeah, we do.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(smiling slightly)
Thank you for understanding. I hope we
can still be friends.

JEN
(nodding)
Of course.

RYAN
(sadly)
Yeah. Friends.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(gratefully)
Thank you. I appreciate it.

The three of them sit in silence for a moment, before the Imposter
Mr. Bean gets up to leave.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(wistfully)
I'll see you both soon.

JEN
(sadly)
Yeah. Soon.
RYAN
(nodding)
Take care.
The Imposter Mr. Bean nods, and walks out the door, leaving Jen
and Ryan sitting on the couch, feeling both hurt and sad, but
ultimately understanding of his decision.

FADE IN:

INT. LIVING ROOM OF THE GOLDEN GIRLS’ HOUSE - DAY

The four ladies, BLANCHE, DOROTHY, ROSE, and SOPHIA are sitting on
the couch, chatting. Suddenly, the doorbell rings.

DOROTHY
I’ll get it.

Dorothy stands up and goes to answer the door. When she opens it,
she sees the Imposter Mr. Bean, with his signature disheveled
appearance and long yellow nails.

DOROTHY
Oh my goodness, who are you?
IMPOSTER MR. BEAN
Hello, I’m Mr. Bean.
BLANCHE
(laughing)
Oh, honey, you’re not Mr. Bean. Mr. Bean
is a skinny British guy.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(laughing)
Oh, I know, I just thought it would be
funny to come here and see if anyone
would notice.

ROSE
Well, we noticed alright. We saw you on
the TV. But come on in, have a seat.

The Imposter Mr. Bean sits down on the couch, causing the ladies
to recoil at the sight of his long, unkempt nails.

SOPHIA
Hey, kid, ever heard of nail clippers?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(smiling)
Oh, I like to keep them long. It makes it
easier to pick things up.

BLANCHE
 Really? Like what?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(shrugs)
Anything, really. Coins, pens, even a
little human skin if I’m feeling
adventurous.

The ladies exchange disgusted looks as the Imposter Mr. Bean

chuckles to himself. He keeps chuckling and Rose, not knowing what
to do, starts chuckling with him.

ROSE
(through forced laughter)
So, what brings you here, Mr. Bean?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

Oh, I just wanted to meet some new people
and have a few laughs. I heard you ladies
were the funniest group in town.

DOROTHY
(laughing)
Well, you heard right.

BLANCHE
(smirking)
But we’ll have to work on that sense of
humor of yours.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(nodding)
I’m up for the challenge.

The scene fades out as the ladies and the Imposter Mr. Bean
continue to chat and joke around, with his long yellow nails
making occasional appearances.

FADE IN:

INT. GOLDEN GIRLS’ HOUSE - NIGHT

The Golden Girls, Dorothy, Rose, Blanche, and Sophia, are sitting
in the living room. They are all feeling uneasy.
DOROTHY
Why do I feel like we're being watched?
SOPHIA
Don't be ridiculous, Dorothy. No one
would waste their time spying on us.
Suddenly, they hear a loud thud from upstairs. They all look at
each other in fear.

ROSE
That sounded like it came from my room.

They slowly make their way up the stairs, trying to be as quiet as

possible. When they get to Rose's room, they see a figure in the
corner, covered in a blanket.

BLANCHE
Who's there?

The figure stands up, revealing the imposter Mr. Bean, who has
been hiding in their house.

MR. BEAN
Hello, ladies.

The Golden Girls scream and run out of the room. Mr. Bean follows
them, his long nails clacking on the hardwood floor. They try to
call the police, but their phone lines have been cut. They are
trapped in their own home with the imposter Mr. Bean.

They hear strange noises coming from every corner of the house.
The doors slam shut and the lights flicker on and off.

SOPHIA
This is it. We're going to die here.

DOROTHY
We have to fight back.

The Golden Girls find weapons and prepare to defend themselves.

Mr. Bean attacks them with his long nails, but they manage to fend
him off.

In the end, the police never arrive and arrest Mr. Bean. He
seemingly disappears, leaving them alone. The Golden Girls are
shaken but ultimately relieved that they made it out alive.

FADE OUT.

FADE IN:

EXT. MIAMI PUBLIC LIBRARY - DAY

The camera pans across the exterior of the Miami Public Library,
the sun shining bright in the sky.
INT. LIBRARY - DAY

The Golden Girls, Dorothy, Rose, Blanche, and Sophia, are browsing
through the library. Sophia comes across a strange book with an
ominous symbol on the cover.

SOPHIA
Hey, take a look at this.

Dorothy, Rose, and Blanche join Sophia as she opens the book.

ROSE
What is it?
SOPHIA
I'm not sure. It looks like some kind of
ancient text.
BLANCHE
Maybe we should take a closer look.

As the Golden Girls begin to read the text, the camera zooms in on
the pages, revealing that the book is written in an ancient
language. Suddenly, the room begins to warp and distort. The
shelves of books begin to shake violently, and the girls struggle
to maintain their footing. As the shaking subsides, the girls find
themselves transported to a strange and otherworldly realm. The
sky is a sickly shade of green, and the ground is covered in a
slimy, organic substance.

SOPHIA
Well, we’re in Hell.

DOROTHY
Oh, ma. but I have a bad feeling about
this.

ROSE
Look!

The girls turn to see the Imposter Mr. Bean standing in the
distance, his long nails clicking against each other.

BLANCHE
What is he doing here?

Suddenly, the ground begins to rumble, and a massive, tentacled

creature emerges from every orifice of the Imposter Mr. Bean. The
girls scream in terror as the creature's eyes fixate on them.
 DOROTHY
We have to get out of here!

The girls begin to run, with the Imposter Mr. Bean following close
behind. The creature gives chase, its tentacles lashing out and
destroying everything in their path. As they run, the girls notice
that the pages of the book they found are now fluttering and
turning on their own.

BLANCHE
Look at the book!

The camera shows a close-up of the book, revealing that the text
is now written in English.

DOROTHY
It's trying to tell us something!

The girls quickly scan the pages, realizing that the Imposter Mr.
Bean is actually an old god who seeks to destroy the world.

SOPHIA
We have to stop him!

As they continue to run, the girls spot a glowing portal in the

distance.

ROSE
There's our way out!

The girls make a dash for the portal, with the Imposter Mr. Bean
hot on their heels. They dive through the portal just as the
creature's tentacles close in on them.

INT. LIBRARY - DAY

The Golden Girls find themselves back in the library, the strange
book lying open in front of them.

BLANCHE
What the hell just happened?
DOROTHY
I don't know, but we have to warn
everyone about the Imposter Mr. Bean.

As they exit the library, the camera zooms in on the book,

revealing that the ominous symbol on the cover has disappeared and
has been replaced with a smiling face of the Imposter Mr. Bean.

FADE OUT.
Fade in:

EXT. MIAMI BEACH - DAY

The Golden Girls are lounging on the beach when Ryan Seacrest
walks up to them.

RYAN SEACREST
Hey, ladies. You won't believe who’s in
town.

BLANCHE
Who is it, honey?

RYAN SEACREST
Imposter Mr. Bean.

The girls gasp.

DOROTHY
What is he doing here?

RYAN SEACREST
He's in town filming an episode of "Mr.
Bean Love Connection." I'm the host.

ROSE
What's that?

RYAN SEACREST
It's a new dating show where everyone is
disguised as Mr. Bean using advanced
augmented reality technology.

The girls exchange skeptical looks.

SOPHIA
Sounds dumb.
RYAN SEACREST
I thought so too, but it's actually been
a huge hit. And I have a surprise for
you. I'm taking you all to the taping
tonight.

FADE IN:

The four Golden Girls, Dorothy, Rose, Blanche, and Sophia, are
standing in line outside the studio where “Mr. Bean Love
Connection” is filmed. They are all dressed in their finest
outfits and nervously chatting with each other.

DOROTHY
(nervously)
I can’t believe we’re doing this.
BLANCHE
(confidently)
Oh, come on, girls. We’re still young at
heart.
ROSE
(excitedly)
I can’t wait to meet Mr. Bean!

SOPHIA
(sarcastically)
Yeah, he’s quite the catch.

RYAN
Welcome, everyone, to another exciting
episode of “Mr. Bean Love Connection”!

The girls cheer along with the rest of the audience. Suddenly, the
lights in the studio flicker and a chill runs through the room.

BLANCHE
(shivering)
Is it just me or did it just get really
cold in here? My nipples have nipples.

DOROTHY
(looking around nervously)
I don’t like this. Something doesn’t feel
right.

As Ryan begins to introduce the contestants, the Imposter Mr. Bean

walks out on stage to raucous applause. The girls’ faces light up
with excitement.

ROSE
(whispering)
He’s even more handsome in person.

BLANCHE
(whispering back)
Rose, that’s the imposter.
As the show progresses, strange things begin to happen. The lights
flicker more frequently, and a shadowy figure can be seen lurking
in the background. The girls begin to feel increasingly uneasy.

DOROTHY
(whispering)
Do you see that?
SOPHIA
(whispering back)
See what?
DOROTHY
(pointing)
That figure in the shadows.
SOPHIA
(squinting)
I don’t see anything.

As the show draws to a close, Ryan announces that it’s time to

reveal the true identities of the contestants. The Imposter Mr.
Bean’s disguise begins to fade, revealing his true appearance. The
girls gasp in horror.

BLANCHE
(screaming)
Oh my god, what is that thing?!

The Imposter Mr. Bean transforms into a grotesque, eldritch horror

before their very eyes. The lights in the studio shatter, and the
girls are plunged into darkness.

SOPHIA
(screaming)
Get me out of here!

Suddenly, the studio lights flick back on, and the Imposter Mr.
Bean is back to his normal appearance. The girls are left confused
and frightened.

RYAN
(smiling)
Well, that was certainly a surprise
ending! Tune in next week for another
exciting episode of “Mr. Bean Love
Connection”!

As the audience begins to file out of the studio, the girls huddle
together, still shaken from the experience.

DOROTHY
 (shaken)
What the hell just happened? Is he a God?
Like a deity?
BLANCHE
Yes, yes! Like one of those ancient,
pagan gods that people used to worship.
SOPHIA
Like Bacchus, the god of wine?
ROSE
Or maybe like Athena, the goddess of
wisdom.
DOROTHY
Hold on, let's not jump to any
conclusions here. We don't even know if
this book is accurate.
BLANCHE
But it explains so much! Like how he can
change his appearance and manipulate
reality.
SOPHIA
And how he has those long, creepy nails.
ROSE
And the way he stares at you, like he's
looking right into your soul.
DOROTHY
Okay, okay, I get it. But what are we
supposed to do with this information?
BLANCHE
We have to warn Jen and Ryan. They're in
danger.
SOPHIA
And we have to figure out a way to stop
that god thing from taking over the
world.

ROSE
Maybe we could perform a ritual or
something. I read about one in a book
once.

DOROTHY
I don't think that's a good idea, Rose.

BLANCHE
Well, we have to do something! We can't
just sit here and let that… thing… wreak
havoc on our lives.

SOPHIA
 She's right. We have to act fast.

DOROTHY
Alright, let's all calm down and think
this through. We'll figure out a plan and
then we'll execute it.

Together. The girls huddle together and start brainstorming ideas,

determined to stop the eldritch god known as the Imposter Mr. Bean
from causing any more harm.

SOPHIA
I know, we'll invite him over for a
spaghetti dinner.

DOROTHY
Ma, that’s not a bad idea. Maybe if we
get to know him better, we can figure out
what’s going on.

ROSE
(nodding)
Yeah, and maybe he can help us figure out
how to fix this interdimensional mess
we’re in.

BLANCHE
(skeptical)
I don’t know if that’s such a good idea.
He’s been giving me the creeps.

SOPHIA
(firmly)
Blanche, we’ve been through worse. We’ll
just have to keep an eye on him.

The girls prepare for their spaghetti party and invite the
Imposter Mr. Bean over. They lay out a big pot of spaghetti and
meatballs and open a bottle of Chianti.

As they sit around the table, the Imposter Mr. Bean seems to be
enjoying himself, albeit in a strange and unsettling way. He
slurps his spaghetti loudly and uses his long, sharp nails to
twirl it around his fork.

DOROTHY
 So, we were wondering if you could help
us out with something.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(pauses, looking up from his spaghetti)
What do you need help with?

SOPHIA
(pointing to the book on the table)
We found this book that says you’re some
kind of god. Can you explain that?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(smirking)
Oh, that old thing. Yes, I suppose you
could say that.

BLANCHE
(uncomfortable)
What kind of god?

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(leaning back in his chair)
The kind that exists in the spaces
between the worlds. The kind that can see
beyond time and space. The kind that can
grant wishes, if you’re brave enough to
ask.

The girls exchange uneasy glances. They had no idea what they were
getting into when they invited him over.

Just then, the room starts to warp and twist around them. The
walls melt away, revealing a vast, empty void. The Imposter Mr.
Bean stands up, his form becoming more and more distorted.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(voice echoing)
I have shown you my true form. Now, what
will you do with that knowledge?

The girls scramble to get out of the void, but they find
themselves trapped. The Imposter Mr. Bean is no longer a mere
imposter, but a terrifying eldritch horror beyond their
understanding.

SOPHIA
(shouting)
 Dorothy, wake up! We’re in the dream
again!

Dorothy wakes up in a cold sweat, realizing it was all just a

nightmare. The book still sits on the table, taunting them with
its secrets.

DOROTHY
(to herself)
Maybe we should have just stuck to our
normal TV shows and card games. This
interdimensional stuff is too much for
us.

The girls share a nervous laugh and put the book away, hoping to
forget about the terror they had just experienced.

CUT TO:
INT. GOLDEN GIRLS’ LIVING ROOM - DAY The girls are discussing
their plan to stop the imposter Mr. Bean.

DOROTHY
Sophia, we need to come up with a plan to
stop this imposter Mr. Bean once and for
all.

SOPHIA
(sarcastically)
Oh great, now we have to deal with
Cthulhu.

DOROTHY
It's not a joke, Sophia. He's been
causing chaos and confusion everywhere he
goes.

SOPHIA
WELL, WHAT DO YOU SUGGEST WE DO?

The girls exchange looks. Nobody has a solution.

SOPHIA
Great, let’s all go back to acting like
it isn’t happening.

FADE OUT.

FADE IN:
INT. GOLDEN GIRLS’ LIVING ROOM - DAY

Rose is frantically covering every reflective surface in the

living room with laundry, including the TV screen. Sophia and
Blanche enter, looking puzzled.

BLANCHE
Rose, what on earth are you doing?

ROSE
I can’t look at any reflective surfaces!
I keep seeing Mr. Bean in them.

SOPHIA
(LAUGHING)
What are you talking about, Rose? You’ve
finally gone over the edge.
ROSE
No, no, no! He’s following us! I know it!

Sophia rolls her eyes and walks over to the TV, pulling off the
laundry covering it.

SOPHIA
Rose, this is ridiculous. There’s nothing
there.

Suddenly, they hear a strange noise coming from the TV. They turn
to see the distorted face of The Imposter Mr. Bean on the screen.

ROSE
(screaming)
I told you! I told you he was following
us!

BLANCHE
We need to do something about this.

SOPHIA
I agree. We can’t just sit around and
wait for him to show up.

BLANCHE
But what can we do?

ROSE
I don’t know, but we have to do
something!
Sophia starts to pace, thinking.

SOPHIA
Wait a minute, I have an idea. What if we
find out where he’s hiding and take him
down ourselves?

ROSE
(laughing insanely)
Sophia, that’s insane!

SOPHIA
It’s better than just sitting here
waiting to be attacked. We have to take
matters into our own hands.

BLANCHE
I’m with Sophia. Let’s find him and stop him once and for all.

ROSE hesitates, but then nods her head in agreement.

BLANCHE
Okay, let’s do this.

The girls all put on their detective hats and begin to

investigate, trying to find any clue that will lead them to The
Imposter Mr. Bean.

They search the house, the neighborhood, and even the library
where they discovered his true identity as an eldritch old god,
but find nothing.

As they regroup in the living room, defeated, they hear a knock at

the door.

SOPHIA
(whispering)
Who could that be?

Dorothy enters, looking suspicious.

DOROTHY
Girls, we need to talk.

The camera zooms in on her face as ominous music plays.

FADE OUT.

Cut to:
The Imposter Mr. Bean scratching his long nails on the front door
of the Golden Girls' house. The girls are sitting in the living
room, oblivious to the sound.

DOROTHY
What is that sound?

BLANCHE
(smiling with sharp teeth that quickly disappear)
Probably just a tree branch, dear.

SOPHIA
(smirks)
Or maybe it's Mr. Bean coming to steal
your man.

ROSE
(whimpers)
I keep seeing him everywhere. I think
he's following us.

DOROTHY
(rolls her eyes)
Oh, Rose. You and your silly
superstitions.

BLANCHE
(laughs)
You know what they say, girls. Once you
go Bean, you never go back.

SOPHIA
(chuckles)
I don't think that's how it goes,
Blanche.

ROSE
(anxiously)
I'm serious, guys. I think we need to do
something.

DOROTHY
(sighs)
Fine. We'll put up some security cameras
or something.

BLANCHE
(shrugs)
Or we could just call the police.
 SOPHIA
(smirks)
What's the matter, Blanche? Scared the
police will take away your Bean?

BLANCHE
(flustered)
That's not funny, Sophia.

Just then, the scratching sound on the door grows louder and more
insistent.

ROSE
(whimpers)
Oh no, he's getting closer!

DOROTHY
(frustrated)
That's it. I'm going to see what's going
on.

Dorothy gets up and cautiously approaches the front door. She

peers through the peephole and sees the Imposter Mr. Bean standing
outside, grinning maniacally.

DOROTHY
(alarmed)
Oh my God, it's him!

The girls all jump up and rush over to the door screaming.

BLANCHE
(gasps)
What do we do?

SOPHIA
(determined)
We fight back.

ROSE
(nervously)
But how?

DOROTHY
(resolute)
We need to get some weapons.
The girls split up to gather weapons from around the house.
Dorothy grabs a baseball bat, Blanche takes a frying pan, Sophia
grabs a cane, and Rose gets a broom. The Imposter Mr. Bean
continues to scratch at the door, his grin growing wider and more
sinister.

DOROTHY
(firmly)
Alright girls, let's do this.

The Golden Girls fling open the door and charge at the Imposter
Mr. Bean, weapons raised. But as they get closer, they realize
something strange – he's not really there. Instead, they see their
own reflections in the window, distorted and twisted into the
shapes beyond human understanding.

SOPHIA
(astonished)
What the hell?

BLANCHE
(confused)
How is this possible?

ROSE
(terrified)
I don't understand.

DOROTHY
(grimly)
It's him. He's messing with our heads.

FADE IN:

INT. GOLDEN GIRLS' LIVING ROOM - DAY The Golden Girls are sitting
in their living room when the doorbell rings.

Dorothy gets up to answer it, revealing Ryan Seacrest and Jennifer

Aniston at the door, along with a young girl.

DOROTHY
Ryan, Jen! It's so good to see you!

SOPHIA
Who's the kid?

JENNIFER
(smiling)
This is my daughter, Beanie.
 SOPHIA
Beanie?
(She looks around at the other women, terrified)
What an interesting name! I’m so glad we
let you in our house.

Dorothy elbows her mother.

BEANIE
(in a monotone voice)
Thank you.

BLANCHE
(to Jen, frightened)
She looks just like her father.

DOROTHY
(to Ryan)
So, how's our favorite host doing these
days?

RYAN
(smiling)
I'm doing great, thanks for asking. And
Beanie is doing well too.

SOPHIA
(whispering to Rose)
She looks an awful lot like her daddy.

ROSE
(whispering back)
Shh, Sophia. Don't let Beanie hear you.

BLANCHE
(to Jen)
So, Jen, what brings you guys to Miami?

JENNIFER
We just wanted to get away for a little
while and thought we'd visit some friends
while we’re in town.

DOROTHY
Well, you know you're always welcome
here.
As they all sit down and catch up, Beanie begins to exhibit
strange behavior, much like her father.

BEANIE
(to Rose, in a monotone voice)
I like the way your skin looks in the
light.

ROSE
(alarmed)
What did you say, sweetie?

BEANIE
(still in a monotone voice)
Your skin. It's shiny.

Sophia mimes a knife going across her throat and points at Rose.

SOPHIA
(whispering)
You’re a goner.

BLANCHE
(uncomfortable)
Maybe we should change the subject.

RYAN
(concerned)
Is everything okay, Beanie?

BEANIE
(in a more animated voice)
Yes, everything is fine. I just like
shiny things.

SOPHIA
(whispering to Dorothy)
That kid gives me the creeps.

DOROTHY
(whispering back)
I know. Something's not right.

BEANIE
(in a monotone voice, turned to face Rose directly
who is turned the full opposite direction, avoiding
eye contact)
My father likes shiny things too. He says
they make him feel powerful.
 ROSE
(alarmed)
Oh my goodness.

Rose stands and begins to cover more reflective surfaces with

laundry.

BLANCHE
(to Jen)
Is she always like this?

JENNIFER
(concerned)
No, this is the first time she's acted
like this.

DOROTHY
(to Ryan and Jen)
You know, this really calls to mind some
strange encounters we've had with the
imposter Mr. Bean in the past.

RYAN
(surprised)
Really? What kind of encounters?

SOPHIA
(nodding)
Yeah, he's not exactly what you'd call a
normal guy.

As they continue to talk, they suddenly hear scratching at the

door. Everyone freezes.

BLANCHE
(whispering)
What was that?

DOROTHY
(whispering back)
I don't know. Stay here. I'll go check it
out.

Dorothy cautiously makes her way to the front door and slowly
opens it. To her horror, she sees the imposter Mr. Bean standing
outside, his long nails scratching at the door.
 DOROTHY
(screaming)
Oh my god!

The others rush over to see what's going on.

RYAN
(startled)
Who is that?

JENNIFER
(alarmed)
Is that the imposter Mr. Bean?

ROSE
He’s been shot!

BEANIE
(in a monotone voice)
Daddy!

BLANCHE
(terrified)
Oh my god, we need to call the police.

But before they can do anything, the imposter Mr. Bean rises,
licking the blood from his jacket.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(laughing maniacally)
Ketchup.
(He smirks)
Hello, ladies. Long time no see. I see
you've met my newest recruit.

The Golden Girls are frozen in fear as the imposter Mr. Bean
advances towards them.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(grinning)
You didn't think I'd forget about you,
did you?

DOROTHY
(bravely)
We're not afraid of you.
 SOPHIA
(nodding)
Yeah, we're tough broads.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

We'll see about that. Show them what we
do to tough broads, Beanie-kins.

Suddenly, the lights go out. The Golden Girls scream as they hear
the imposter Mr. Bean coming closer and closer. As the darkness
envelops them, a faint glow emanates from Beanie. The others
notice that she's starting to shine, and her eyes begin to flicker
with a strange light.

BLANCHE
(astonished)
What's happening to her?

RYAN
(in disbelief)
Is she... glowing?

The imposter Mr. Bean stops in his tracks, looking at Beanie with
a mixture of fear and confusion.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(stammering)
What is this? What are you doing?

Beanie's voice booms through the darkness, now filled with a

strange power.

BEANIE
(commanding)
Leave us alone!

The imposter Mr. Bean recoils, stumbling backwards. His face

contorts in pain as he clutches his head.

IMPOSTER MR. BEAN

(screaming)
No! This can't be happening!

With a final burst of light, Beanie sends a shockwave that sends

the imposter Mr. Bean crashing to the ground.

The lights flicker back on, and the Golden Girls gasp in shock.
Beanie lies unconscious. The imposter Mr. Bean lies motionless on
the ground as well, gallon upon gallon of black reflective liquid
pouring from every orifice of his body.

BLANCHE
(in awe)
What just happened?

DOROTHY
(smiling)
I think we just witnessed something
amazing.

RYAN
(impressed)
I don't know how to explain it, but it
looks like Beanie just saved us.

ROSE
(taking Beanie’s pulse)
…She’s dead. She’s fucking dead!

The Golden Girls gather around Beanie, hugging her tightly. They
know that they've just been through something extraordinary and
that Beanie made a great sacrifice to save their lives. They try
to pick her up to do a victory spin, but Beanie’s lifeless body
flops to the ground.

BLANCHE
Well, I guess we know who won't be
joining us for bingo next week.

The women all laugh.

FADE TO BLACK.