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'A Comedy of Errors' in Seven Acts
'A Comedy of Errors' in Seven Acts
Language: English
little irregular...
IN
SEVEN ACTS
BY
SPOKESHAVE
ALIAS
OLD FOGY
SUPPLEMENTED BY
SOLEMN CONCLAVE"
BY
OLD FOGY
LUZON PRESS
E. J. HABERER, PUBLISHER.
1914
PREFACE
As many were not able to secure all the Acts of "A Comedy
of Errors" owing to the editions having been exhausted,
and as numerous friends have expressed a desire to secure
it entire, the author has concluded to publish it,
supplemented by four more recent compositions.
—Old Fogy.
A COMEDY OF ERRORS
By SPOKESHAVE
ACT I
Dramatis Personae
Page.
vain,
vain
south.
The north winds chill and stunt the subtle power
line;
down,
pains.
mind.
tongues
nod.
Francos: Most noble Caesar, thou at wisdom's fount Hast drunk until
the fountain hath run dry.
throne,
scheme,
words employ
shield,
And thus an enemy may work his death.
Francos: Mine ears are open to thine every word, Would that they could
but hear in distant Isles;
wise,
Francos: Most honored sire, I would from Quezox learn What stern
encounters I must early meet.
wise.
place.
soul,
clean
soul;
scorn.
soul.
thoughts!
proclaim
crown.
hides
gold,
ship."
Exeunt both while Caesar washes his hands with invisible soap.
ACT II
Dramatis Personae
Scene: On shipboard
moved,
born.
sky,
way
deck,
taste.
mind
place.
men.
work.
path,
fruit.
game.
the trail
distrust,
spoon,
goose,"
bones.
mould,
wears a smile.
full,
Quezox:
Night
breasts,
despond?
Quezox:
Francos:
well,
blood,
can charm
were
men,
doth squirt
Most
sapient
thought,
for
mankind's
betterment.
Francos to Quezox:
my bile,
raise.
shoot.
( Earnestly)
the ax,
so
Francos:
sure
That careless word of wrong import hath not
Seldonskip:
Francos:
hand?
( Laughingly)
choice.
breast, muttering)
flow;
spout.
indeed
Not to seek combat with a foe so stout.
( Aside)
wretch
street
Francos: But Ha! The port is nigh and we must hie ( The
City in the distance)
( Anxiously)
things?
at Quezox).
Dramatis Personae
Caesar soliloquizing.
throne.
shrewd fling
grievous ills
custom, are
fate.
indeed,
state,
hand
state
path
mien
knight?
smile
the front
guile
weak
expect.
o'er
foe
wheel,
tongues
keen,
Thus
hiding
well,
from
all
the
thoughtless world.
breast.
encased
Singing
to
startled
worlds
sweet
freedom's song.
false,
home
swill.
on.
keen,
desire
wine.
not
tongue
But I must call the lightning to mine aid, And order him
who now bemoans his
fate,
lain,
way
soul.
Exit
Caesar.
deck.
hope,
boasts.
throne.
fail.
well
seek;
meet;
wrongs,
those
disdainful eye
dead.
steed,
ear,
worthy thoughts;
wise,
garb
So they shall mellow sound a fiery
thought.
hast weighed.
placed.
reflect
wound.
retching soul.
skies.
Anent
sweet
Seldonskip,
whose
wandering eye
dame.
look
keep
well
give
Francos: 'Tis well. But still I fear me over much That he,
like highly tempered steel, will
bend
raging storm,
to life
did indwell.
uncertain age
which we kneel.
I pause.
mind
misinformed.
of clay
Much finer than is wont within the mold, And so I eager seized
his proffered aid.
soul
drop
doubt.
Quezox: Ha! Ha! I see! he hath so little force,
That gravitation with him worketh not!
laws
design
nests,
countermatch,
done.
keen.
hence
device.
must rule
nights
me?
spy,
port.
speaks
hath brains.
who, dull,
were said.
moves off
muttering to himself)
throng.
Dramatis Personae
Commissioners
day.
guide
yearn,
(Slowly retires)
mind
Enters
(Seldonskip retires.)
Turns to
smile.
tongue
(Enters Seldonskip)
Francos: Fear not! Caesar hath wise discerned that all Who
long have on these Islands made their
home
snap.
speak,
(Francos appealingly):
ACT V
Dramatis Personae
Two Gentlemen.
Delegation of Englishmen.
speed.
regreet;
tale
womb
do ring.
kind
unknown
scanned?
Isles
pow'r did
frown,
place.
halt
weight
pregnant facts
Which may perchance to thee be quite
unknown.
( anxiously)
minds.
speech
urge.
impart. (Retires
would speak
slip.
Francos (earnestly):
plead?
Gentlemen: Ha! Ha! Methinks a subtle humor finds Its home within
the mind of him who rules.
here
Gentleman: Most noble Governor, I sore lament That from our noble
South there be men
here
grand
childhood's milk.
These men did quick condone the ev'ry act
thought
discontent
That discord here among our party friends Would breed distemper
if 'twere not
ignored.
work
(Exeunt Gentlemen).
Francos: But Bonset, see'st thou not that native worth And
mental parts may overtower the gold
(Bonset doublingly)
( Enter Quezox)
deep
cognition
( Enter Carpen)
forth.
net.
solved
tread
bring
speed
make.
( Exit Quezox)
forsooth
whisper)
me hail
march
Quezox,
grand,
All speak:
declaim,
fancy rule
ACT VI
Dramatis Personae
Filipino Gentlemen.
Muchacho.
Scene I: A garden.
Quezox sits in an arbor with lute in hand; sings.
I.
heart;
Deep-rooted there
part.
II.
calls,
My Lady fair,
III.
Quezox soliloquizes:
But
Venus,
though
enwrapped
by
passion's robe,
bow'r,
mind
waft
hence.
steps
calls;
path
removed.
words,
sealed,
gentleman,
out,
muchacho. )
Muchacho: What wouldst thou, sir; mine ears did hear the call,
primed.
dare presume
thirst.
vine
assumed
stand?
demands.
childish pap,
( Exit muchacho)
well
shoes;
streak
flatt'ring tongue
himself,
dream
sprout;
place.
speaks):
desire
( Exit muchacho)
would cease.
plaints
plea.
demand
quest.
command.
needs,
sun
day.
( Enter Gentlemen)
yours.
wise
house.
screen
treasured thoughts.
thought require.
1st Gentleman:
Good Quezox, tell us, doth our plan seem
ripe?
from
2d Gentleman:
name
state.
3d Gentleman:
sympathy
love
dream;
case
wall.
To speak of sanitation were unwise
place,
1st Gentleman:
plans
protest.
2d Gentleman:
berth
bring,
( Exit muchacho)
Reflectively:
My firm insistence did one cancer cure
strife
wrath.
king,
3d Gentleman:
demands.
more;
cares,
ends.
( Exeunt omnes)
knot
place,
1st Gentleman:
creep?
walk.
2d Gentleman:
nest
flight.
3d Gentleman:
Francos, hesitatingly:
eye
doth like
wait."
brain,
foe.
life.
All speak:
pie
fight.
dogs!
Francos, fretfully:
bestow
face
work.
face
room)
1st Gentleman:
voice
hie
prove
well
we may.
undo.
2d Gentleman:
3d Gentleman:
our foes.
place.
mind
direct
take,
act
come
clear.
fits.
me.
But Carpen, is this chief most proper named?
food,
veins.
sent.
Francos: Ah, well I know the arts political Our foes did
practice when they filled a
nest
words.
( Enter Quezox)
Reveals
the
treachery
which
thee
surrounds.
here
see
( Aloud)
trough.
( Exit Francos)
( All join hands and sing as they dance the Tammany slide. )
swill.
he'll kill."
ACT VII
Dramatis Personae
McDuff . . . . . . A Publican.
Caesar soliloquizing:
pierce;
our touch
those laws
thence efface.
entombed.
her home,
close entombed
He raped their locks and brought the
treasure forth.
did dream
space
return
him light;
dark
doom
on
hue,
shell
source of life.
handiwork.
reigns
throne,
anchor fast,
there.
deep
throne
Unharmed
by
venomed
darts
of
turpitude?
Which
economic
matters
would
control.
toil,
wisdom full,
wing
cunning wrought,
brings
clan,
words
clime,
source;
cock-sure,
there.
aside
pie?
esteem
sun.
( With energy)
hand.
And seeks admission that he may explain His conduct. Shall I, bid
him enter here?
man.
( Quezox retires and fetches Printus)
here.
come
knife,
portends
love.
had?
Francos: ( severely:)
ring.
part
and storm.
(Exit Printus)
door.
demand.
Francos: Sweet sire, an era new we usher in, And knowing well
that thou dost
entertain
obtain,
choice
(Exit Somnolent)
walk
block.
precedence;
twere
well
to
demonstrate
controlled
holds.
clip.
not,
But only girds our loins for battles new.
turned
(Exit McDuff)
begun.
burst!
(Sings)
and thigh;
Francos, applauding:
and retire.)
fancy rule
Dramatis Personae
Knowing full well that when one's thoughts are paged They like foul
spirits menace peace of mind.
That pow'r should ever from below take root; I little dreamed
that subtle minds would carp
"These varlets have no place within these Isles And quick should
speed them to their native land;"
But mem'ry doth recall the "pine-tree" wilds Where fate decreed
that I should have my birth,
COUNT LUIE:
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
SIR WINDBAG:
But when "the Man of God" his voice doth raise In ecstasy to
praise my every word,
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
SIR WINDBAG:
Ah Ha! I see! The game, not fairly played,
Upon some high official post, which we Must give because "he knows
just what he wants."
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
COUNT LUIE:
SIR WINDBAG:
fancy rule
SIR WINDBAG:
FRANCOS:
SIR WINDBAG:
When first thy mouth did voice the burning thoughts That trickled
from a brain much overwrought
FRANCOS:
SIR WINDBAG:
SIR HIGGS:
SIR HENMART:
FRANCOS:
SIR HENMART:
FRANCOS:
With green-winged parrot did engage, and fain Its neck would
there have wrung because its hue
SIR HIGGS:
SIR WINDBAG:
FRANCOS:
SIR HENMART:
FRANCOS:
What! hast thou heard, on wings of rumor borne,
SIR HIGGS:
FRANCOS:
SIR HIGGS:
FRANCOS:
SIR WINDBAG:
fancy rule
A Council of War
Dramatis Personae
FRANCOS:
bode
But ill to us, who God's anointed are.
SIR HENMART:
Are those who dare opinions firm to form; If loyalty alone shall
be test,
SIR WINDBAG:
COL. TOADY:
pow'r.
SIR HIGGS:
Alas, 'twas ever thus. I, in the past,
quills,
FRANCOS:
SIR WINDBAG:
turn blue.
COL. TOADY:
host
Who long have languished from the want
of pap,
energy
FRANCOS:
point
COL. TOADY:
place.
SIR HIGGS:
step?
beware.
SIR WINDBAG:
FRANCOS:
aground,
shoals avoid.
SIR HIGGS:
tones,
make
craft;
wash
the cruise
dwell.
COL. TOADY:
take
With men of color standing at the helm; But let them reap the
tares which they
have sown,
game?
debar
they want."
FRANCOS:
COL TOADY:
discern
attributes
place
me out!
FRANCOS:
mire,
mien;
moment comes
heads
spine erect
SIR WINDBAG:
words
be.
FRANCOS:
the
form,
track
COL. TOADY:
sword,
FRANCOS:
SIR HIGGS:
guillotine
War:
tradition.
hearty;
party."
ALL SHOUT:
Hip, Hurrah!!!
and a
Tammany Tiger!"
OLD
FOGY
fancy rule
A Solemn Conclave
Dramatis Personae
Ilustrados
Representatives
Count Luie
Tightwad Twins
A Band of Minstrels
A MINSTREL SINGS:
winging,
night,
face.
FIRST ILUSTRADO:
copious drafts
Muse;
responds,
FIRST REPRESENTATIVE:
wings.
dwells,
rejoice
state,
close
fast.
SECOND ILUSTRADO:
lot
FIRST ILUSTRADO:
expressed.
hats.
SECOND ILUSTRADO:
isles
bear.
own,
THIRD ILUSTRADO:
shields.
FIRST ILUSTRADO:
SECOND REPRESENTATIVE:
FIRST ILUSTRADO:
THIRD REPRESENTATIVE:
they,
the
"haughty
Dons,"
did
sympathize
men;
FIRST TWIN:
filched
feeds.
play.
sought.
SECOND TWIN:
here,
walls.
pow'rless now,
discern.
FIRST TWIN:
shades,
And were these men in high official place
plans.
FIRST ILUSTRADO:
quiv'ring flesh;
FIRST REPRESENTATIVE:
warn
taste.
FIRST TWIN:
climb;
frown.
not,
Great Sensation
SECOND TWIN:
thoughts;
Doubtfully
FIRST TWIN:
COUNT LUIE:
SECOND ILUSTRADO:
want
COUNT LUIE:
land,
homes
ALL IN CONCERT:
turn
( Aside)
with a self-satisfied
I.
II.
night,
song.
III.
view
high'r.
land:
IV.
We'll eat the meat and let them pick the bone
fancy rule
A Democratic Wake.
Dramatis Personae
COUNT LUIE:
blood
praise
voice,
( Enthusiastic applause. )
A DEMOCRAT:
burst
SIR OBREON:
march.
COUNT LUIE:
tongue,
grows
SIR LA MUTT:
SIR OBREON:
skies,
doom.
grave.
A DEMOCRAT:
come
SIR LA MUTT:
who fell?
Our honor in the combat, for but one Did fall before the
golden calf, and he
eye.
SIR OBREON:
placed
COUNT LUIE:
slave,
observe
A DEMOCRAT:
love,
bright stars
COUNT LUIE:
smoother ring,
SIR LA MUTT:
SIR LA MUTT:
fiercely crow,
redeemed.
eyes,
gaze?
wealth.
Alas! the northern "mudsills" did prevail, And now the white
supremacy is held
lend
style,
He, being slow of wit, did know it not;
fast:
COUNT LOUIE:
disdain
mind,
A DEMOCRAT:
But victory still sitteth on our perch,
A REPRESENTATIVE:
COUNT LOUIE:
knights
earth
( Reflectively. )
sweet;
FINIS
finis
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Document Outline
SEVEN ACTS BY
SPOKESHAVE ALIAS
OLD FOGY "SIR WINDBAG CONSULTS COUNT LUIE," "AN IMAGINARY OFFICIAL CONSULTATION,"
"A DEMOCRATIC WAKE," "A COUNCIL OF WAR" AND "A SOLEMN CONCLAVE" BY
1914
PREFACE