VGE2E12 – Jean-Pierre Manchette, Fatale (1977)

Aimée fit la grimace en voyant de la lumière à l’étage de la demeure, à la fenêtre de la

chambre du baron.
Aimée scowled / seeig when she saw the light on upstairs at the baron’s Commentaire [1]: A nice example of
onomatopoeia !
bedroom window.
Commentaire [2]: Remmeber this
translation of « à l’étage »
Attentive à ne pas faire crépiter le gravier, la jeune femme se déplaça dans Commentaire [3]: ‘s needed her
l’obscurité, alla appuyer sa bicyclette contre le mur de la gentilhommière.
The young woman went and leant her biycle against the wall of the manor, Commentaire [4]: the sentence is easier
to translate if you start with the main
moving cautiously/ carefully in the darkness so as not to make the gravel crunch. subject, the woman.
Commentaire [5]: note the translation of
Immobile dans le froid de la nuit, elle attendit encore un grand quart d’heure. « aller faire » = ‘go AND do’
She stood quite still in the cold of the night and waited another good quarter of Commentaire [6]: adevrbs !
an hour Commentaire [7]: emphatic use of still(=
very stil)

Par instants ses dents s’entrechoquaient, son estomac palpitait et elle suait, mais
elle ne ressentait toujours rien.
From time to time her teeth chattered, her stomach churned and she broke out Commentaire [8]: as these actions are
viewed in their entirety (rather than being
in a sweat, but she still didn’t feel anything. ongoing), it’s better to use a preterit.

A ce moment elle aurait pu repartir, regagner la gare, ouvrir tous les casiers, et
disparaître, par le train de 4h35.
At that moment she could have left, gone back to the station, opened the lockers Commentaire [9]: Modal auxiliary !
and disappeared/ vanished on the 4.35am / four thirty-five train. Commentaire [10]: Compound
expression – 4.35 is used adjectivally

Elle fouilla dans son sac. A tâtons elle enfila des gants de ménage en plastique.
She rummaged in her bag, felt around for the rubber gloves and put them on. Commentaire [11]: A nice word to
remember !
Commentaire [12]: Two verbs are used
Elle contourna la demeure. to translate « à tâtons elle enfila » =
She walked round [to the back of] the house ‘felt around + put on’
Commentaire [13]: add a verb of motion
[…] Aimée s’approcha de la petit porte de derrière dans l’intention de la – walk is probably the most likely.

crocheter, mais elle n’était pas fermée à clé.

Aimée walked up to the little back door with the intention of picking the lock/ Commentaire [14]: With the intention
OF DOING something
forcing it open, but was not locked/ it was open.

La jeune femme alluma une petite lampe électrique en forme de stylo.

The young woman switched on a small pen-shaped torch. Commentaire [15]: Torch – small
battery-operated lamp

Ayant traversé le hall, elle fit quelques pas dans le salon.

She crossed the hall and stepped into the living [sitting/ drawing] room/ Commentaire [16]: « pas » becomes a
verb (‘to step’) in the translatio

Le mince pinceau de sa torche balaya les meubles et les tiroirs qu’il faudrait
ouvrir, en les fracturant au besoin, pour simuler un cambriolage.
 VGE2E12 – Jean-Pierre Manchette, Fatale (1977)

The thin beam of her torch swept over the furniture and the drawers she would Commentaire [17]: the term used for
describing light.
have to open, break open if necessary [if needs be], in order to fake a burglary [to make
it look like a burglary

Puis Aimée revint dans le hall, décrocha le Weatherby Regency, l’ouvrit. Il état
vide.
Then Aimée came back into the hall, unhooked the Weatherby Regency and
opened it up. It was empty.

Elle y mit deux cartouches de 12. Elle monta l’escalier avec prudence.
She inserted / put in/ two number 12 cartridges and climbed the stairs very
carefully/ went carefully up the stairs. Commentaire [18]: Adverbs !

Dans le couloir de l’étage, la porte de la chambre était ouverte. Le ronflement du

baron s’entendait.
On the landing, the bedroom door was open. She could hear the baron snoring. Commentaire [19]: Useful word to
remember
Commentaire [20]: Add a human agent
Aimée entra dans la pièce, alluma l’électricité et braqua les canons superposés du
Weatherby sur le baron.
A. went into the room, turned on the light and aimed/ pointed the double- Commentaire [21]: You need to be more
specific here (not just ‘electricity’)
barrelled Weatherby at the baron.

La lumière, tout d’abord, n’éveilla pas l’homme. Couché sur le côté, il ronflait.
Son visage avait une expression butée.
At first/ initially the light didn’t wake the man. Lying on his side, he snored on, Commentaire [22]: Syntax change
with a stubborn expression on his face/ His face wore a stubborn expression. Commentaire [23]: Personal pronoun in
Eng.
Commentaire [24]: You can WEAR an
Le fusil braqué, Aimée demeura peut-être trente ou quarante secondes à regarder expression on your face in Engish
le baron endormi, sans tirer.
Aimée stood there, the gun pointed, for maybe thirty or forty seconds watching
the sleeping baron without pulling the trigger. Commentaire [25]: Without DOING
sthng

Elle fronça les sourcils. Ses lèvres pâlirent. Elle les mordit.
She frowned. Her lips went/grew pale. She bit them Commentaire [26]: To go/grow pale

Elle paraissait avoir de la difficulté à tenir le Weatherby droit. Avec exaspération,

elle tapa du pied sur le sol.
She seemed to have trouble holding the Weatherby straight. She stamped [her Commentaire [27]: To have trouble
DOING sthg
feet] in exasperation.

‘Feu, nom de Dieu !’ cria-t-elle.

‘Shoot, for Christ’s sake !’ she shouted.

Jean-Pierre Manchette, Fatale (1977).