All Life’s a Stage

Coming to this world may become positive or negative. Every individual has
their stages in life. Enjoying the stage, you're in and keeping in mind that it will pass
soon are good ways to overcome any challenges. As I saw last time on the internet, the
concept is "Every stage of life lays the groundwork for the following stage." All life's a
stage, wherein Erick Erikson explained more in the discussion. I've heard his name for
the longest time, and his theory always made sense. Before I share, my experiences
with him are love and hate. I love his approach because it is very comprehensive and
easy to understand, yet whenever there is an exam in Developmental Psychology, I
wouldn't say I like all the terms. I should've been more inclined to examples rather than
meanings, in which making a journal can be a great help to understand future exams.

My journal for today will mainly cover Erikson's Biography and the ego of the
post-Freudian theory. I'll start with his Biography. Remember, in the last journal, I told
there that Erich Fromm's approach was reasonable. Well… I'll add more to that or even
better. I have prior knowledge about Erikson because Ms. discussed it with us many
times. So when Ms. Ivana told us that his story was amazing, I believed that, and a part
of me was eager to learn more about him. As soon as Miss started to discuss, I heard
that he didn't know his birth father. What's with all these Psychologists? They all have
'daddy issues'. (HAHAHA)

Despite that, I believed and heard that his life was very positive. Just like mine, I
do not mind if I haven't seen my father, but a part of me also wants to see and know
him. Although my mother decided that she would become both father and mother,
that is the greatest sacrifice for me. Erikson asked himself when he was getting to age
with lots of curiosities, "Where is my father?". I also asked that question when I was in
elementary. I also searched through Facebook then my cousin caught me finding my
father and reported it to my mother. This is the part wherein I am also relating to
Erikson. Her mother was lying. My mother somehow lied to me too. She told me my
father died during his work, so she said I shouldn't search for him. It was when my
cousin caught me searching for his face, but later, I overheard their conversation that
my father has another family, which my mother didn't want me to know. I didn't ask any
questions about him anymore. I am just grateful that my mother is here with me.
 As he ventured away, he became explorative. I remembered the discussion here
is about the things that we can do. Although the challenges like Erikson did not finish
his studies, he became an influential and well-known Psychologist. I realize that even
though I fail, this will never define everything about me. I will strive harder like him and
be as strong as his desire to become what he wants.

I was going back to the father's story. Anna Freud threw an honest talk to Erikson
about his father. "Stop fantasizing about your absent father." My grandmother always
tells me to stop finding my father. She always tells me “Wala na siyang lugar dito. Iniwan
niya kayo ng mama mo.” Journal, why are you making me cry? I miss my Lola. Even
though she's harsh with me, I believe it's what they call tough love, and I don't care if it
is the most intimidating thing in the world. At least I am her favorite granddaughter.

All his experiences lead him to promise himself that he will be a good father. I
can relate to this. It’s good to promise, but sometimes I stop saying it. Why? I believe
that I shouldn’t just say it to the world. I learned that I should practice it already rather
than promising. Saying a promise without any actions to do then will have a crisis for
both parents and children. They can become very toxic, which can lead to not being
supportive parents. The professor discussed that having a child is a life-long
responsibility. It’s good that I have families and friends who are very open about it and
can educate us whenever we need to. My friends and I are all aware of pregnancy which
gives us an advantage to not decide based on our emotions but with wise decisions.
We were all serious when it comes to this topic, we are jokingly saying “Di ako magiging
tita niyan, bahala ka magbuhay dyan.” Those words left a mark on us. We don’t plan to
have one. We also say “Ayaw ko dagdagan populasyon sa Pilipinas, dami na nga
naghihirap.” I want to have a small family, mostly when I become stable, but my top
priority is to graduate first and have a job to sustain myself and my mother.

Last is the Epigenetic Principle. I remembered I recited about this because this
is what I learned from him throughout the years. "Anything that grows has a ground
plan, and that out of this ground plan, the parts arise, each part having its own time of
special ascendancy until all the parts have arisen to form a functioning whole," he said
in his description. My example here is how my mother let me enjoy my childhood. I still
haven't done activities because I am not allowed to, but I think my childhood was very
impressive. She lets me play daily and tells me when it's time to stop. Enjoying
childhood is the best thing my mother did for me. I realize that when I grow old, it is
not the same as before. I always did Agawan Base, Patintero, Piko, and Tumbang Preso
when I was a child. She even encouraged me to join in every dance activity in school.
 In life, a stage is like not proportional staircase. There will be times when the
stairs are high or low, representing the waiting time for growth. Once I reach the stages,
I continuously adapt. Giving positivity in every chapter of life is an excellent way to finish
it positively. Before the discussion started, I also advanced to reading about him. I went
through YouTube and happily found a cover of Call Me Baby turning into Erikson’s
stage.(here’s the link: https://youtu.be/BV7Wcd7LblA) Last Monday, I saw a quote that
said, “Just when the caterpillar thought the world was over, it became a butterfly.” Even
though we all are struggling now, we will soon get the peace of mind we deserve.