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PROLOGUE

Iam inav erycompr omi singposi ti


on.Myhi psar eup
i
nt heairandmychesti sont hebedwi thmyhands
ti
edont hebedpost .Icanf eel himi nev erypartof
me.Hegoesi ndeeperi nt omeandIl etouta
scream ofpl easur e.Ar oughspankcomesi nto
contactwi t
hmybut tcheekandIl etoutasqueal .
"Thatswhyy oumyf av our i
tef uck.",Ithi
nkasMenzi
keepsonhi ttingi tfrom t heback.Igetav eryintense
orgasm andhet urnsmear ound.I '
m onmyback
withmybut tbalancedbyacushi on.Hi sgoingt odr i
l
l
i
ntomeandhar d.Her ubshi msel fonmymyv agi na
beforeenteringmesl owl yrecei vi
ngamoanf r
om me.
Inandouthegoes.Lef tandr ightandheci r
culates.
Hispacesl owbutgi vingmesl owt hrusts.Mymoans
aresol oudr i
ghtnowandI '
m sweat i
ng.Iam gr inding
onhim ashet hr
ust sinmeandi t
sdr i
v i
nghim
haywire.Ili
kei twhenmenf eel weakbywhatIgi ve
them.Hi sshaki ngandIknowhi saboutt ocum.Hi s
groansgetl ouder .
"
Cum f
ormeMenzi.
",Iwhi
speri
nhisearfol
l
owedby
amoanandIbi
tehi
sear.Helet
'soutal
oadgroan
andIcum ashet
hrust
sthr
oughouror
gasm.Hef
all
s
ontopofme.
"
Menzi
ehl
i
ka"(
getof
f)
Het akeshi m selfoutsmoot hlyandImoanal i
ttle.
Heunt iesmeandIst retchmyar msandmov emy
wr i
st sar ound.Mywr istsar eredf r
om met uggi ngat
ther opeandIneedt obuymor eoi ntment .Igetup
from t hebedandheadt ot hebat hroom tot akea
shower .Menzi wal ksi nlaterandIf indmy sel f
cravinghi m agai n.That sthet hingwi t
hme.Idon' t
getsat isfiedeasi ly.Iwantmor eandmor eofwhat
youhav et oof fer.Icanseehi swor noutsowet ake
ashowerandhel eavesl ater.Menzi isoneofmy
fuckbuddi es.I'm noti naser iousr elati
onshi p.They
allfail causeIal way scheat .Ihav eanaddi ct ion.I t
s
notdr ugsoral cohol butit'ssomet hingbet tert han
that.Somet hingwaymor eintoxicat i
ng.I'
m asex
addi ct.Ihav e3f uckbuddi eswhi chconsi stof
Menzi ,Thabani andZenande.Theydon' tknowofmy
addi ctionact uall
ynobodyknows.I 'mj usta24y ear
oldPAatKhuzway oLawAndOr der.I'
m anor phan
andIwi llsayt hej ewel bet weenmyl egshashel ped
meoutt ogetti
ngwher eIam today .Yes,Isl
eptmy
wayoutoft heorphanageandsl eptmywayt o
getti
ngaj obatthislawf ir
m.I'
vebeenMrMay asPA
sinceIwas19.Il efttheorphanageat18andIwas
supposedt ostaytil
l21butsomet hinghappenedin
thereandIhadt oleav e.Ever
ybodyknowsmeast he
COOsPA.Ani ndependentwomanofi ntegri
tywit
ha
bullter
ri
erdogandnoman.
01
UNYEZI
I'
m smokingonaci garett
eandIhav etobeatwor k
by07:30andi tsstil
l05:00.Iam lookingoutthe
hugestgl
asswi ndowi nmyapar t
mentandt hev i
ew
oftheoceangi vesmepeace.Ial readytooka
showerandj ustsitt
ingont hewoodenf l
oorlooking
atthesea.Theweat herisabi twindytodayandt he
ti
desarehigh.Ist ayinar enttobuyapar t
mentwi th
mydogPl utoinBl uff.I
tsar eall
ybeautif
ulapartment
andI'
m payinghar dcashf orthi
sapartment.Pluto
comesandl iesnextt omewi thhisheadonmyt high.
"
Justy
ouandmePl
uto.Justy
ouandme.
"
HelooksupatmeandIknowheappr eci
atesme.
Histheonl
yonethatdoesandIl
ovehim.It
s05:
48
andIneedtogetdressed.
"
ComePl
uto.Let
'shav
esomebr
eakf
ast
."
Hecomesrunni
ngaf
termeandIfi
lluphi
sdi
shwit
h
dogf
oodandhiswaterbowl
hasfr
eshwater
.Il
eav
e
hi
mtohismealandheadtomybedroom.
"For
malpant
s.Shi
rt
.Bl
azer
.Heel
s.Ahwher
e'smy
coat?
"
Igof orthecl osetandItakeoutmybl ackcoat .My
workpl aceisst ri
ctonformal wear ,
weonl ygetto
wearcasual clothi
ngonFr i
days.Idr essupandI
makenoodl esasIwai tforPluto'sNanny .Yes,my
dogisspoi l
tandhasananny .Plutoi slikemybaby
andI'vehadhi mf orayearandaf ewmont hs.Igot
him afterJupi t
erdiedandIlovedt hatBul ldogof
mine.Hewaswayt oooldandhi sdeat hhithard.I
eatmynoodl esandIbr ushmyt eethaf terbreakfast
.
It06:28andhi snannywalksinasIam headi ngfor
thedoor .
"HeyNana. ",
IgreetherandNanai sherni cknamewe
call herinthecompl ex.She'sa18y earoldandt hey
strugglingabi tsoshei swor ki
ngf ormesoshecan
putenoughmoneyf orterti
arynexty ear
.Herf ather
wal kedoutont hem ay earagoandl uckil
yt heir
apar tmentwasal r
eadypai dforbutIdohel pwith
theirbill
sher eandt her
e.Herbr otherisa
recept i
onistatmywor kplaceandhi sagr eatkid.
"
HeyUny
ezi
."
,shegr
eet
sandhercol
oredaccent
makesmynamesoundwei r
d.Idohav ear arename.
ItmeansmoonandIl ovethemoon.Theor phanage
ownerMrMkhi zesaidmymom hadal readynamed
mewhenshedr oppedmeof f
.SoIgoaboutmyday s
asUny eziSosibo.Ikeptmysur nameandIhav e
nevermetaSosi bohereinDur ban.It
s06: 34andI
walkoutandt hewi ndisblowingst r
ongly.Iinhal
e
thefreshbreezef r
om theocean.Youdeser v
e
nothi
ngbutt hebestUny eziandwi ththatthoughtI
headt owardsmycar .MrMay ahasameet i
ngat
08:00t i
l
l10:00soIneedt ogett hebedr oom. .
.Sorr
yI
meanboar droom excusemymi nd.
02
UNYEZI
I'
vebeeninandoutoft heboar droom t
odayt hat
whenlunchcameIdi dn'tevengoout .Iorder
eda
wrapperknownasa' shwarma' inDurban.I'
m atmy
stat
ioneati
ngwhilewor ki
ngoutMrMay asschedul
e
tomorrow.Hissonhasasoccergameat15: 30
tomorrowandhehast obet here
"Ngekeuphel
elweumsebenziUnyezi
.Eatandyou'l
l
conti
nueaft
erlunch.
"(
youwon'tl
oseyourjob)
,the
l
oudbarit
onevoicesaysandIknowitsMrMay a.
Il
ookupandIwi pemyf acewithser vi
ett
e.MrMaya
i
sar eall
ydesir
ableman.Hei sabout6f t2wit
hbroad
shoulder
sandav er
ymanl ychest.Hissexappeal
giv
esy ouanorgasm oni t
sownpl ushisdar
kskin
andhazel br
owney esdon'tdojusticetoanyfemal
e.
"I
'
mjustwor ki
ngony ourschedulefortomor
rowSi
r.
",
myvoiceprofessi
onalasever.Thisisatwor
kandI
l
ovethisj
obsoIdon' tt
ryanythi
ngonanymal e
empl
oy er
.
"
Shoul
dIor
dery
ouany
thi
ngsi
r?"
,Isayashebegi
ns
t
owal
ktowar
dshi
sof
fi
ce.
"Nothanky
ouUny
ezi
."
,hesay
sandcl
osest
hedoor
behi
ndhim.
Itakeadeepbr eath.Dammi tDarl
yMay a!Itakeasip
atmycol dglassofl emonade.Ineedasmoke.Iput
onmyheel sandheadout si
de.Smoki ngisn'
tal
lowed
i
nsidet hebuil
ding.Istandaf ewmet resawayf r
om
theent r
anceandl ightmycamel switch.Ipopboth
switchesandt akeapuf f.I'
mjuststandingther
e
smoki ngmyci garettesi
ndeept houghts.
"I
nkosazanaenhlekangakaibhemaugway i?"(
Such
abeautif
ulladysmokescigaret
tes?),
aver
ydeepand
i
ntensevoicesays.I
thadthiseffectonmethatI
neededtoputoutthecigaret
teandsubmi t
.Idon'
t
submittonomal e.
Ili
ftmyheadupandI 'm metbythisdarkskinned
mani naBrentwoodandav erywhiteshir
tasi fit
s
new.Hi scologneismixedwithtobacco.Asmoker
j
udgi nganother?Udaki
welo!(t
hisoneisdr unk!)His
facialfeat
uresarever
ytense.Hisgotav erystrong
j
awl ineaccompaniedbyav er
ywel lst
ructurednose.
Hisupperl
i
pisdarkwi
ththebot
tom onepur
pli
sh.
Uponmakingcont
actwi
thhisey
esIseetheocean
andthemoon.
"
Arey
ouamer
mai
d?"
,Iaskhi
m.
Hel
aughs.Wt
fbazal
wane?Whydi
dIaskt
hat
?!
"
Cahnkosazana.Ngi
phi
lalaemhl
abeni
."(
NoLady
.I
l
i
veonearthl
ygrounds.
),
heanswer
s.
Ismileali
tt
leathim andheonlyl
ooksmei nthe
eyes.Igetl
ostinthem agai
n.Theocean.Waves.
Themoon.Ti des.Hisadream.Afi
cti
onalcharact
erI
readaboutinmybooks.
"
Excusemesir
.Ihav
et ogetbacktowork.
",
Isay
whenIfi
nal
l
ystopswimminginhiseyes.
Iwal
kinsi
det
hebui
l
dinghur
ri
edl
y.
03
UNYEZI
Inormal lywor kfrom homeonweekendunl essMr
May aneedsme.Ij ustcamebackf r
om Pl uto' s
appoi nt
mentandhei ssleepi ngatt hebackseat .
Theysai dhi sbodywasr eject i
ngt hebr andIwas
feedinghi m.Hehadanal ler
gi cr eactiont oit.I
normal l
ydon' tcal lNanai nbutIneedt obuyst ufff or
Plutoplussheear nsext r
abucks.WhenIpar kedt he
carshewasal readywai t
ingout sidemyapar tment
door.IliftedPl ut
oupi ntomyar msandseei nghi m
knockedoutl iket hismademet ear y.Ishoul dn' t
havechangedhi sbr and.Iwal ktowar dst hedoorand
Nanahel psmei n.IputPl utoonhi ssl eepingbagi n
hisroom.It ookt hepacketofdogf oodoutofhi s
room.Isai dby etoNanaandt hrewt hedogf oodout
onmywayt ot hecar .Iam get ti
nghi m backonhi s
usual brand.Idr i
v etoPav i
li
onwhi chisqui t
ef ar
from wher eIst ay.I'ml i
steningt oNowandFor ev er
bydr ake.Thatdogi sallIgotandIputhi sl i
featr isk.
Ifoundapar kingspotandcal medmy sel
fdown
beforest eppi ngoutoft hecar .Iwasn' tev endr essed
tobeher ebutIdi dn'tgiveafuck.Iwor emybl ack
sweat pantswi t
hav er
yhugehoodi et hatbelongedt o
Thabani withmyai rforceandmyaf roisamess.I
walkt owardst hepetst oreandIbuyhi m afewt oy
s
andhi susual dogf ood.Ipushmyt rol
leyto
Wool worths.Ineedj erseysaswi nt
eri scl
ose.
Dur banreall
yisn'tcoldbutI'm scaredofthecol d.I
buyaf ewjerseys,j
eansandf ormal pants.Ialsodon't
forgetsomeundergar ments.Icrushsomeone
trol
leywithmi ne.
"
Sor
ryaunt
y."
Say
sadeepv
oice.Aunt
y?Thi
schi
l
dist
all
ert
hanme.
"
Wat
chwereyougoingNkosi
nat
hi.Uphi
uLanga?
",a
f
ami
li
arv
oicer
ingsout.
Ourey esmeetandIseet heocean.Themooni ssti
l
l
therejustthati
tshinesbright
erthist
imearoundand
thetidesseem veryhigh.Onlyonehumanbei ngcan
havemeswi mmi ngintheoceani nhi
seyeswhile
standinginthemi ddl
eofast ore.
"
Wemeetagai
n."
,hesay
sbr
eaki
ngmef
rom my
t
rance.
"Andyou'
rest
il
lwear
ingt
hoseBr
ent
woodpant
s."
,I
sayjoki
ngl
y.
Theguyhecal l
edNkosi nathilaughsandhesmi les.I
swearIjustgotanor gasm whi lestandingr i
ghthere.
I'
veneverseenasmi lesoent icingbef ore.Ithi
nkhe
noti
cedhowIcl enchedmyl egst ogetherandhow
mybr eat
hehadqui ckened.Dammi tUny ezi
!Geta
gri
p!Hissmi lesgetbi ggerandhi sdi mplesget
deeperandt heoceanbet weenmyl egsexpands.
Nkosinathi
sensi ngtheat mospher ewal ksaway .No
manhasev erhadmef eeli
ngl ikethis.Noman
04
UNYEZI
It
sabout00: 20andI '
vejustfini
shedsmoki ng8
ci
garett
esandI 'm smokinganot herone.Ihada
night
mareact uall
ymor elikeaf l
ashbackandI '
ve
beenupev ersince.Justonei ncidentanditchanged
mywhol elif
e.IthappenedwhenIwas17t il
lIwas
18andIr an.It
soneofmydemonst hatkeep
chasi
ngme.Wher ei smyweed?Ist andupandgo
openupmydr awer .Ihave5j oi
ntsleftandItakeone
andIplayPabl obyBi gstarftZocci CokeDope.
"Idon'ttr
ustnobody
.Feel
likeal
lmyniggas
switchingonme.Allmyli
feI'
vebeenchasingmoney.
Couldnev erl
eavemyli
feinpeace.If
eell
ikePabl
o."
Ihaver edli
ghtsoninmyr oom andIfeell
ikeI'min
hell
.Menonl yseewhat'sbetweeny ourl
egs.They
feelentit
ledtoourbodies.Theyuset hei
rstrength
forthewr ongreasons.I'
dbechar gedwithhomi ci
de
beforeletti
nganothertouchmewi t
houtmyconsent .
Iruntheshownow.Ichoosewhoget sinbetween
myt highs.Ihavebeeninlov eoncebutitdidn'
twor k
causeIwasnev ersati
sf i
edImetZenande.Il ookat
thescaronmyi nnerthigh.Unyezidon'tthinkabout
i
t.Iam lookingatthemoonandIf eelcontent.Il
ook
atthescenebef oreme.Gl ist
eningmoon, beautif
ul
oceanandshi ni
ngstars.Langalakhel
ihle.Ifeell
i
ke
I'
ml ookinginhiseyesrightnow.Igetdi sturbedbya
phonecal l
.Itsabout01:43r i
ghtnow.Itsanunknown
number .Itakethecall
.
"
Uny
ezi
Sosi
bo.
"
"
MaGemaomuhl
e."(
Beaut
if
ul)
Ir
ecogni
set
hev
oicer
ightaway
.
"
Thatwasf
ast
."
Ihearhi
m chuckl
eont
heot
hersi
de.
"
I'
m ar
esour
cef
ulman.
"
"
Icanneverdi
sagr
ee.Coul
dn'
tyouwai
tti
l
ltomor
row
t
ocall
?"
"Thewickeddoesn'
tsleepMaGema.Fut
hibengi
funa
ukuzwaiphimbolakho."(
PlusIwant
edt
ohearyour
voice.
)
Ismi
l
eatt
his.
"
OkayKhuzway
o."
"Yazingizokuzhada.Ngi
kujabul
i
seukhohlweyonke
i
nhlunguowadl ulakuyo.
"(YouknowI'
llmarryy
ou.I'
l
l
makey ousohappyy ousohappyyou'
llfor
get
every
thingy ou'
vebeenthrough.
)
If
eel
tear
swellup.Typi
cal
Zul
umanthinksev
ery
womanneedsmarri
agetosav
ethem.
"
Langalakhel
ihl
e.Youdon'tev
enknowmet
hatwel
l
.",
myvoiceisfull
ofemotions.
"
Iknowal
otmor
ethany
oucoul
dimagi
ne.
"
Idon'
tknowhowtoreplyt
othat
.Ther
eisnowayhe
canknowanyt
hingaboutme.
"
MaGema.Ngi
cel
aukukukhi
pakusasa.
"(CanIt
ake
y
ououtt
omorr
ow.)
Itwasastat
ementandIcansensefrom t
he
author
it
yinhi
svoi
cethatIcantdecl
i
ne.
"
OkayKhuzway
o."
"Ul
alekahl
eucishel
ont
sangu.
"(
sleepwel
landput
outthatj
oint
.)
BeforeIcanaskhowheknowst hishecut sthecall
andIhearacardr ivi
ngof f.Igopeekatt hewi ndow.
It
sabl ackgolfanditleavest hecompl ex.Noway
thatwasLanga.Howwoul dheknowwher eIliv
ed?
Dummyhewasabl etogety ournumber si naday .I
closethewindowsandputoutt hej oi
ntandIf allon
mybed.Myhandhangi ngont hesideoft hebedand
Ifeelt
hedemonundermybedgr aspi
ngit.Ifall
asleepwhil
ehi gh.

WhenIwakePl
utoi
sli
cki
ngmyf
ace.
"
Plut
o!Letmesl
eep!
"
Hest
art
sbar
kingandmov
ingar
oundmybed.
"
Okayokay
!I'
m up!I
'
m up!
"
Hewagshi stai
lseei
ngI
'
m up.Iheadf
ort
he
bat
hroom withhi
m onmytai
l.Ibr
ushmyteet
hand
washmyf ace.
"
Whyar
eyousohappy
?"
Iaskhi
m ashekeepswaggi
nghist
alesi
deways.He
goestothegl
asswal
landst
art
sbarki
ngatit
.
"
Ah.Youwannat
akeawal
kwi
thmami
don'
tyou?
"
HebarksandIgiv
enhim waterandfoodfi
rstand
whi
lehiseat
ingIwearmytracksui
ts.Igot
ohis
r
oom andItakehisdogl
eash.
"
Comebuddy
.Let
'sgo.
"
Iputthel eashonhi m andweheadoutt he
apartment .Wegetdownt hesmal lfl
ightofstairs.I
am metbymydownst airsneighborandwegr eet
eachot her.I'
m notreallycloset oanyone.Ikeept o
my sel
fmost lysoIdon'tletany onein.Isignoutat
thegateandweheadf orthebeach.Assoonashi s
pawst oucht hesoi l
hei sbarkingandspi nni
ng
aroundi ncircles.
"
Don'
tyoul
ovet
hebeach.
"
Wet
akeawal
kandpl
ayher
eandt
her
e.
"
Timet
ogohomePl
uto.Comeon.
"
Iputhi
m onhi sl
eashagai
nandweheadbackt othe
complex.Ineedtowashmyhai r
.Plut
opushedme
onthegroundnowmyhadhasseasand.Hedr i
nks
waterwhenheent er
sthehouse.Igotakeabat
h.I
j
ustsoakmy sel
fandIr
ememberthatIhaveadate
today
.ItsSundayandIhopehi
snotgonnat akeme
tochurch.Igrabmyphoneandcal
lhim.Itr
ings
once.
"
MaGema"
Ihearcommot
ioni
nthebackgr
ound.
"BabauNkosi
nat
hiuy
angshay
a!"aki
dshout
sint
he
backgr
ound.
"
Mshay
enawemanLanga!
",heshout
sback.
"
Hai
bonj
aloKhuzway
o.Khuzaabant
wana.
"
Hemumbl
esbef
orehestar
tsshout
ingatNkosi
nat
hi.
I
tgr
owssi
l
entontheot
herside.
"
MaGema.
"
"
Unj
ani
?"(
Howar
eyou?
)
"
Ngi
ri
ghtwenaunj
ani
?"(
I'
m al
ri
ghtandy
ou?
)
"
I'
m okay
.Whattimearewemeeti
ngup?Wher
ear
e
wemeeting?Whatshoul
dIwear
?"
"I
'
llf
etchyouat12:
30.Wearcasual
comf
ort
abl
e
cl
othes.
"
"
Iwoul
dsendmyaddressbutsomet
hingt
ell
sme
y
oualr
eadyknowwhereIl
iv
e."
Helaughsatt
hisandit
sbeauti
ful
deepandhusky
ki
ndoflaught
er.Hay
iUnyezi
!
"
Ngi
zokufounel
abesengi
ngaphandl
."(
I'
ll
cal
lwhen
I
'
m out
side.
)
Wedr opthecallafterbyes.Thisisadanger ousbut
veryexcit
ingrouteI'
mt aki
ng.I'vebeenfeeli
ng
dif
ferentl
atel
y.LikeIdon'tcravealltheothersthe
same.Thel astti
meIhadsexwasFr i
daywi t
h
Zenande.Istil
lhavethaturgef orsexbutitsasifmy
bodywant ssomeoneel se.Itfeelsli
keIhaveanot her
addicti
on.Letmest opthinki
ngmuchi ntothis.
May bemyaddi cti
onisjustsubsidingabi t
.Istart
cookingsoftporri
dgeandIam ni bbl
ingonamuf fi
n.
Iam goingthroughmyI nstagram andIhav eaDM
fr
om Puma.
"
DearUny
ezi
_Sosi
bo

Wewouldli
keyout
obeanambassadorforour
cl
othi
ngl
ine.Wewi
llsponsory
ouwi
thnewdealsof
Pumawear
.Youwil
lreceiveaR10000permont
h.
Andyouwi
l
lhave30%of fourmer
chandi
se.

Pleaserepl
yandify
ouagr
eewewoul
dsendt
he
necessaryi
nfor
mati
on.
PumaCl
othi
ngLabel
"
I'
m shookr ightnow.YesIdohav eabout7k
foll
ower sonI nst abutmna?Uny ezi?Sponsor edby
Puma?Iwantt heex t
racash!Isendar eplyandI
uploadaf ewpi cturesofmeandPl utot hanIexi t
i
nst a.Idishupwhent hesoftporridgei sr eadyandI
eatpeacef ull
y.Af tereati
ngIwasht hedi shesand
cleansar oundt heapar t
ment .I
t'
s11: 59andIst il
l
don'tknowwhatt owear.Ioptformybl ackcar go
pant swithat urtleneck.Shoes?Mi li
taryboot s.It
s
kindacol dout si desoIchooseabl ackdeni mj acket
.
Myhai risanestsoIbr aidi
tnicelyandIputona
blackbeani e.Ineedt omakeanappoi ntmentwi t
h
thehai rdreser .Plutoislooki
ngatmequest i
onably.
"What
?Ihaveadat
ebutdon'
tworr
yNanasaidshe'
l
l
cometakey
outothedogpar
ktoday.I
tsdogday
t
odaysot
heyopen.
"
Hewagshistai
landstar
tspinni
ngaround.Il
aughat
hi
sbehav
ior.Heprobabl
ymetaf emalecompanion.
I
ts12:
30whenmyphoner i
ngs.
"
Uny
ezi
."
"
Ngi
ngaphandl
e."(
I'
m out
side.
)
"
Okay
.Ngi
yeza.
"(I
'
m comi
ng)
Heisv erypunctual
.IwalkoutwithPlutoonhis
l
eashandIseehi mleavi
ngonaMer cedesBenzold
school.Nice.Hisweari
ngblacklevi
sjeanstodayand
hehasbr ackets.Heshouldstopwearingthat
Brentwood.Hiswear i
ngahoodieandi tfi
tsperf
ect
ly.
Godt hosearms!Henot i
cesusast hegat eopens.
Wher eisNana?Thisdogi ssohappyhi spull
i
ngon
hisleash.
"
Plut
o.Behav
e."
Heli
stenst
omeandst
andssti
l
lbuthi
stai
li
sst
il
l
waggi
ng.Hewal
kst
owardsus.
"
Sihambanenj
a?"(
Wet
aki
ngt
hedog?
)
IshakemyheadasPl
utowant
stoj
umponhi
m.
"
Plut
o.Si
t.
"
Hewhinesandsitsdown.Helovesmeeti
ngnew
peopl
ehef or
getshismanner
s.Langabendsov
er
andbrushesPlut
o'scoat
.
"
Inhl
einj
ayakho.
"(Yourdogi
sbeaut
if
ul.
)
"
Thanky
ou.
"
IseeNanar
unningourway
.Thegat
eopensandand
shehur
ri
estowardsus.
"
Sor
ryUny
ezi
."
,sheapol
ogi
zes.
"I
tsokay
.",
Ipassi
ngt
hel
eashandPl
uto'
sbagof
goodi
es.
Ikneel
down.
"
Bye.I
'
llseey
ouwhenIcomebackal
ri
ght
?"
Hel
i
cksmycheek.
"
Plut
o!"
Ilaughandwi
pemycheekwi
thsomet
issue.Iwal
k
towardshi
scar
.
"
Sowher
ear
ewegoi
ng?
"
"
KwaMashuShi
sany
ama.
"
I
'veneverbeenther
ebefor
eandIheardit
sa
danger
oust ownshi
pevenuMlazi
isbett
er.Il
ookat
hi
m scepti
call
yandhelooksatme.
"
Ungabi
nenki
nga.Uhambanami
.Ir
unKwamashu.
"
(
Donworry
.Youwithme.)
"
That
'sar
edf
lag.
"
Hel
aughsatt
hatandshr
ugsi
tof
f.
"Andyouwon'tl
eavemealoneeveni
fyouknewI
wasagangl or
d.You'
veswam i
nmyey es.Oncey
ou
entermyoceanyoucanneverl
eave.
",
hesays
randoml
y.
"
Wel
lar
eyouagangl
ord.
",Iaskcur
ious.
"
Nonothi
ngl
i
kethat
."
,andhi
stonet
ell
smet
he
t
opi
cisdi
smi
ssed.
Heputssomemusi
conandi
tsMaskandi
.Lor
dI'
m
gonnadi
e.
"Ngithengi
qalaukuk'bonantokazi
ngangazjuzoba
umf aziwami.Ngiy
az iukut
himinanawesidalel
wene
sthandwasami .Ngizokushadangi
kuni
keinjabul
o."(
I
knewt hef
ir
stt
imeIsawy outhatIwasgonnamarry
you.Iknowwemeanttobemyl ove.I
'
llmarr
yyou
andmakey ouhappy
.),
hesingsalongtothi
ssong.
Ijustadmi r
ehim andInoticehisweari
ngoneof
thoseLacost esneaker
sthatar ever
yexpensive.
Thismani sr i
chIgiveyout hatj
ustabadtasteof
fashion.Inoti
cehishoodiei sact
ual
lyaVersaceone
andIl ookathim.
"Wangbhekakanj
aloy
indaba?
"(Whyar
eyoul
ooki
ng
atmelikethat
?)
"
Whatdoy
oudo?Yourj
oboccupat
ion?
"
Helooksatmeandcont inuesdriving.Guesswho
won'tanswert
hat.Il
ookout si
det hewindowand
mindmyownbusi ness.Wepasswhoonga( nyaope)
addict
sastheybegformoneyandt ryt
of i
ndtheir
nextfi
x.Ther
eisagirlamongstt hem.Ifeel t
ears
wellupinmyeyes.Anotherlif
elostt odrugsand
povert
y.
"
Uny
ezi
?Ngi
bheke.
"
Iwi
pemyt
ear
squi
ckl
yandt
urnt
olookathi
m.
"Ihopeyounotcr
yingcauseIdi
dn'
tanswery
our
questi
on."
Ishakemyhead.
"
Phoukhal
elani
?"(
Whyar
ecr
ying?
)
"
I'
m notcr
ying.
"
"
Wenzani
keh?
"(Sowhatar
eyoudoi
ng?
)
Ij
ustkeepquietandgetbusyonmyphone.Ir
ecei
ve
atextf
rom Thabani
.
:
"Cutcont
actwi
thme.If
oundsomeone.
"
Il
aughatt
his.Ihar
dlyev
encont
acty
ou.Idel
etehi
s
number
.
"
Yinil
engakaekuhl
eki
say
o?"(
What
'smaki
ngy
ou
l
augh?)
"Facebookst
uff
."
,Idi
smi
sshi
m andputmyphone
away .
West opatthi
sshisanyama.It
sSundayvibes.Jazz
pl
ay i
nginthebackground.Hepar
kshiscarandt hi
s
Zulumandoesn'tevenopenmydoorf orme.
Jehovah!Igetoutofthecarandhi
sstandingthere
wi
thhi
shandsi
nhi
spocket
s.
"
Doy
ouhav
ebr
other
s?"
Hel
ooksatmeconf
usedandnodshi
shead.
"
Tellt
hem Unyezi
saidheyshoul
dtel
lyouwhatdo
youdowheny ouwit
hal adyi
nacarandy'
al
larr
ive
wherey'
al
lat.
"
Hel
ooksatmel
ostasf
uck.
"
Tel
lthem.
"
Henodsandt akesmyhandi nhis.Youcan'
topen
thedoorforkodwayoucanholdmyhand.Amen!We
walkinsi
deholdi
nghandsandt heystar
twhist
li
ng
andsay i
ng"AhSgagqagagqamadoda! "
Iguesshiswell knownaroundherandhedidsayhe
runskwamashu.Henodsatev eryoneandt
heyget
backt owhattheydoing.Hefi
ndsusaexcludedseat
from ever
yone'seyes.It
akeaseat .
"I
'
llgoordersomemeat
.Uphuzani
?"(
whatdoy
ou
dri
nk?)
"
Wine.
"
Hel
aughsatt
his.
"
Isesnigqawungqawi
nil
a.Wedon'
tdr
inkwi
ne.
"
(
Thisisthehood.)
Il
ookathi
m dumbf
ounded.
"
Aci
dert
han.
"
Henodsandwal ksaway.Inoti
cewhenhet akesout
hiswalletfr
om hisbackpockett
hatther
ei sagunon
hiswaist.Hebetternott
rytoshootme.Idon' tev
en
hav emygunwi thme!Dammi tUnyezi
.Alight
skinnedniggacomesandsi ti
nfrontofme.
"
What
sabeaut
if
ulgi
rll
i
key
oudoi
ngher
e?"
"
Pleasel
eav
e."
"
Yout
hinky
out
heshi
t.
"
Il
aughatt
hisr
emar
k.
"
Ify
oudon'
tl
eav
enowI
'
llpunchy
ourf
ace.
"
Hegr
ipsmyhandandIl
ookathi
m.
"
Ohy
out
het
ypet
hatt
hinkwomenowey
ou.
"
Hegr
ipsmet
ight
erandIpunchhi
m onhi
snose.
Ev
eryonef
inal
lynot
iceswhenhescr
eams.Shi
t!I
br
okeanail
.Ipunchhim agai
nandi
feel
armshold
meback.
"EhSani
!Uzoli
malaubambaint
ombiyakaBas
kanj
alo.
",
say
st hemanhol
dingmeback.
"
Hlehl
amf anangi
ngazengikuci
theubucopho.
"
(
Mov eboybefor
eIshootyouinthehead.)
Langai
spissed.Heput
sthet
rayoff
ooddownand
comestowardsmefir
st.
"
MyekeMuzi
."(
Leav
eher
.)
ThisMuziguylet
'sgoofmeandIcheckmyhand
fi
rst.Myknuckl
esarebleedi
ngandsoi
smyfi
nger
causeIbrokemynail.
Theyt
aketheli
ghtski
nnedni
ggaaway sandhis
nosei
sbroken.Ismi
lewhenIhearhi
scries.Pussy
.
"
Youf
ine?
"
Inodandheengul fsmeinhisarms.Uh.
..Ahug.I
hughim backawkwardly.Hecall
saguytobri
ngt he
fi
rstai
dkit.Iwonderwheretheywer
etakingt
hatguy.
That'
swhyIdon' tl
i
kehood.Itsadanger
ousplace.A
dar
kpl
ace.
05
UNYEZI
I'
m eat ingtheworsonlyandit
sisdel
icious.Langa
hasf inishedhi
sworsandhi seat
inghislastpieceof
steak.Thi smaneatsandnonofusar epay ing
attentiontothepap.Iatethesal
adcausei twas
chill
i.Ilovechi
ll
i
.
"
Youpl
anni
ngont
ouchi
ngt
hatst
eak?
"
Il
aughandpushmypi
ecesofst
eak.
"
Awuy
ifuni
?"(
Youdon'
twanti
t?)
"
Cah.Idon'
tl
ikest
eak.
"(No)
Heshr ugsandeat s.Weeatinsilence.Iam now
dri
nkingPi neTwist.Hesuggestedit.I
ttast
esr eal
l
y
good.Ineedt ostockupont hese.Hei sdri
nkinga
castl
elite.Hewipeshishandswhenhi sdoneeat i
ng.
"
I'
m sor
ryaboutwhathappenedear
li
er.
"
"
It
sokay
.Ij
ustbr
okeanai
lthat
sal
l
."
"
Sti
l
l.Youhur
tyourknuckl
es.
"
"
Ibr
eakmyknuckl
esal
ot.I
tsnobi
gdeal
."
Henodsandst
aresatme.
"
What
?",
Iaskshy
ly.
"
Cel
aungshade.
"(
mar
ryme)
Il
aught
il
lIreal
isehi
sdeadser
ious.Thi
sguyiscr
azy
.
It
sourt
hir
dencounterandhewantstomarr
yme?A
whol
eUnyezi?
"Langa.
",Ij
ustsayhi
sname.Idon'
tknowwhatt
o
say.
"I
'
m agr ownmanUny ezi
.I'
mtur
ning30inafew
monthsandIdon'thaveti
meforgames.Iknow
aboutyouaddi
cti
on."
Ichokeonmysali
va.What
?!Myeyesareashugeas
ball
sri
ghtnow.Howdoesheknowthat?Unlesshe
hadaccesstomyrecor
dswit
hmyt her
apist
.
"Iknowal otofst
uffUnyezi
.Iknowat onofstuff
.
SomeI '
lll
etyoutell
mewheny ou'reready.You
resul
tedtosexwheny oucouldn'thandlesomest uf
f
andsexiswhatIcangi v
ey ou."
,hissayingthi
s
calmlyandhislooki
ngmei ntheey es.
"
Youj
ustmetmeandy
ouwantt
omar
ryme?At
l
eastaskmeoutkqal
a.Seei
fyoucanhandl
emy
addi
cti
on.
"
"IcanhandleyouUny ezi
.Noaddicti
onlast
slong
unlessyouwantittoo.Ihav
ehadmyownshar eof
begging.Spendi
ngmoneyondat es.I
'v
ebeen
throughallt
hatandIcandot hatwhil
emar r
iedto
you."
Iam si
tt
ingheredumbfounded.Idon'
tev
enknow
hi
mt hatwell
.Ican'
tj
umpi nt
oamar ri
agewi
tha
str
angerIdon'
tevenknowwhat '
shisj
oboccupat
ion.
"Youdon'
thavetoanswerrightaway.Nowits
gett
ingl
ateandKwaMashuhi j
ackscarsandIdon't
wanttoki
llany
oneinfrontofyou."
,hesaysst
anding
up.
Thismani swayt oobold.Hesay swhatevercomes
tomi ndatthatexactmoment .IstandupandI
real
iseI'
mt i
psy.Iam abouttocleanthetable.
"
No.Weownt
hispl
ace.Thest
affwi
l
ldoi
t.
"
"
We?
"
Hej
ustl
ooksatmeandt
akesmyhand.Hedoesn'
t
botheransweri
ngmyquest i
on.Il
ethim be.Whenwe
getoutsi
deitsraini
ng.Wer untothecarandhe
opensmydoorf orme.Thisguy!Hedidn'tdothi
s
whenwear ri
vedear l
ieron.It
akeofmyj acketand
tur
nont heheaterinthecar.
"
Yourpl
acei
sfarandi
tsr
aini
ng.Ihav
eahouseher
e
i
nKwaMashu.
"
Thismannev erceasestosurpr
iseme.Hisactual
ly
tel
l
ingthatwegoi ngtohispl
ace.Iam t
ipsyandI'
ma
buzzinthecar.Iactual
l
ywantasmoker i
ghtnow
andgetoutoft hesewetclot
hes.
"
Youhav
eki
ds?
"
Henodsandst
eal
sagl
anceatme.Il
oveki
ds.
"
Howol
dar
ethey
?"
"
Nkosi
nat
hii
s14.Langal
ami
is10.
"
"
Nkosinat
hii
s14?Emudekanj
e?"(
Whenhi
sthat
t
all
?)
Hechuckl
es.
"
Wher
eist
hei
rmot
her
?"
"
Shedoesn'
tseet
hem.Shel
eftwi
thanot
herman.
"
Heclencheshisj
awwhensay ingthis.Heseems
angryandIknowIshouldstopaskingtoomany
questi
ons.Heparksinfr
ontofabeaut i
ful
house.I
ts
notbigbutit
sbeauti
ful
.Thegateopensandhe
dri
vesin.Therei
ssecuri
ty.What
'sthesecuri
tyf
or?
Asifhereadmymi nd.
"
Notev
ery
bodyl
i
kest
heKhuz
way
os.
"
Ilookathim ev
enmorecuri
ous.Thi
sguyis
my st
eri
ousandoddlyIl
iket
hat.Weruni
nside
towardsthehouseandheunlockst
hedoor
.
"
Ngena.
"(Geti
n)
Doeshehavetocommandme?Dominantmuch?
Wewalkinsi
deandhecl
osest
hedoorandlocks.
"
Letmegetuswar
minher
e.Getcomf
ort
abl
e."
"Iwannagetoutoft
hesecl
othesandIal
sowantt
o
haveasmoke."
"
Passage.Seconddoorony
ourr
ight
.Don'
tsmokei
n
myroom thou.
"
Iheadt
owar
dst
hepassageandIgott
oadmi
tit
sa
nicehouse.Not hingdr amat i
cjustcosy.Iwal kinsi
de
hisr oom andi tboy ishandv erycl
ean.Ist art
stri
ppi ngt hanopenhi scloset.I'
m buttnaked.Thi s
room smel l
sli
kehi m.Itakeouthi ssweat shortsand
abl ackt ee.Iroll
theshor tsbymywai sttokeep
them t here.Ilookf unnyinhisclothesbutmybut t
l
ookscut eintheseshor ts.Igrabmyci garettesand
exithisr oom.Hel ooksatmeandchuckl es.
"
Youl
ooksexyi
nmycl
othes.
"
Thewayhesai ditwassoent ici
ng.Hewal ksinside
hisroom andIheadt ot hekitchen.Hehasawi ne
cell
ar.Itakeoutsomewi ne.Thisseemsexpensi ve.I
ri
nseoutagl assandpoursome.It asteitandI '
mi n
l
ov e.Il
ov ebev er
agebazal wane.Iopent hekitchen
windowandl ightmyci garret
e.Hewal ksindr essed
I'
mj ustswagpant sandhi sdickpr i
ntiswel lshaped.
Hehasawel ldefi
ned8packwi t
hav -
line.Hischest
i
ssomanl ywithtatt
oosonhi sleft
.Nkosi nathi.
Langalami .Hissonsnames.Myey esmov eupt ohis
Adamsappl eandhi sjawline.
"Youey
ef ucki
ngmer
ightnow.Takeuzenzel
e."(
Do
asyouplease.
)
Igul
pdownt
hecont
ent
sofmywi
ne.
"
Iseeyouf
oundt
hewi
ne.Fi
nal
l
ysomeonet
odr
ink
t
hat.
"
Hepour
shimsel
fsomewhisky
.Hetakesthe
ci
gar
ett
efr
om meandtakesapuf
fandblowsthe
smokeonmyface.
"
Langaman!
"
Helaughsandthosedi
mplescometodispl
ay.I
sit
nor
mal tohav
eaheartbeati
nyourcl
i
tor
ious?
"
Iwannaki
ssyou.Bendy
ouov
ert
hiscount
er.Dr
il
l
i
ntoev
erypar
tofyou.
"
Iswall
owmysal i
va.Idon'
tknowhowtorespondt
o
that
.Hefi
nishessmokingandclosest
hewindow.
"I
tsrai
ningcatsanddogsoutt
here.It
hinkyou
shouldcal
lthatgi
rly
oulef
twit
hPlutocauseyou
maybegoi nghomet omor
row.I
ftherainst
ops."
HewalksoutandIt
akemyphoneonthecount
er.I
di
alNana'
snumberandsheanswer
s.
"
Uny
ezi
."
"HeyNana.I
'
m kindsst
ucksocany
oul
ookaf
ter
Plut
oforme.I'
l
lpayextr
a."
"
Nopr
obl
em.Wel
ovehav
inghi
m ar
ound.
"
"
Thanky
ouNana.
"
Itakethebottl
eofwineandmygl assandheadt he
l
ivingroom.Thisguyneedst
oputonashi rtbeforeI
takeadvantageofhi
m.Itswarm now.Iput
everyt
hingonthetabl
eandIpouranotherglassof
wine.
"Youmaywannagoeasyont
hatwi
ne.Youmi
ght
endupundermesweaty
."
Ilookathi
m andhei sjustsi
tt
ingtherepr
essingt
he
remoteli
kehejustdidn'tmakethatconment.Why
doesthismanstil
lsurpriseme?
"
Let
'sbi
ngeonser
ies.Moneyhei
st?
"
"
Fav
ori
te.
"
I
tstart
splay
ingandIsi
tinbet
weenhi
slegsandl
i
e
onhischest
.Hedoesn'
tcomplai
n.
Iwakeupwi thmyf acei
nhischest.Wemi ghthave
fall
enasleepandIchangedmysl eepingposi ti
on.I
trymov i
ngmybodyt oonlyhavemygr oi
nr ubonhi s.
Hegr oansandIstopmymov ement.Itrymov i
ng
againandourgroansmakecont act.Shit!Ican'tev
en
mov eupwardscausehehasat i
ghtholdonme.
"
Uny
ezi
stopi
tman!
"
Irel
axandjustputmyheadonhi
schestagai
n.Hi
s
handgropesmybutt.
"
Khuzway
o!"
Hechuckl
es.Thewi
nenoty
etoutofmysystem and
hav
en'
thadsome.Icl
enchmythi
ghstoget
her.
"
MaGema?
"
"
Mmmh?
"
"
MaGema?
"
"
Khuzway
o?"
"Yi
ni?Wangahl
ali
seki
.Uf
unani
?"(
What
?Youcan'
tsi
t
sti
l
l.Whatdoyouwant?)
"
Not
hing.
"
Hesitsupst r
aightwit
hsti
llontopofhim buthe
opensmyl egsot heyoneit
hersideofhim.Thisisa
verycomprisi
ngpositi
on.Thewi neispl
ayi
ngwi t
h
myhor monesr i
ghtnow.I'
ml ookingathi
mi nthe
eyesandIcanseeheknowswhatIwantbutwant s
met osayit.
"
Khul
umaMaGema.
"(Tal
k)
Igrabhisfaceandkisshi
m andher esponds.Hi
s
l
ipsaresosof tandIcanst
il
ltastethewhskeyand
tobacco.Hepullsoutasi
tgetsintense.Dammi t
!
"MaGema.Youcan'tj
ustgrabmeandkissme.
Ngit
hiufunani
?"(
Isai
dwhatdoy ouwant.
),
hi
sv oi
ce
i
sreall
yhoarseandful
lofemoti
on.Hi
seyesarered
andsmal l
.Heisr
eadybutwantsmetosayit.
"
Iwanty
ou.
",Ibr
eat
heout
.
"
Yimlo.Uf
unani
kimi
?"(
Her
eIam.Whatdoy
ouwant
f
rom me?)
"
Iwanty
oubur
iedi
nsi
deme.Ial
lofy
ou.
"
Andjustl
i
ket
hathegrabsmebythewaistand
ki
ssesmehungr
il
y.Helicksmyl
owerl
i
pandIdon'
t
granthi m access.Hi sot herhandmov esupt omy
smal lper kybr eastsandhepi nchesmyni ppl e
causi ngmet oyelp.Heusest hatopeni ngandsl i
des
hist onguei nmymout h.Ourt onguesbat tlef or
domi nanceandhewi nsandIcanf eel hissmi rk.I
startgr indingonhi scausi ngf ictionbet weenour
origins.Hegr oansandmov esi nt hesamer hythm
wi t
hme.Het ugsatt heT- shir tandpul l
si tov ermy
head.Hest artskissingmyneckear ningsof tmoans
from me.Hi shandsar eonmybr eastwi t
hhi s
fi
nger spl ayingwi thmyni ppl es.Hegoesdownunt i
l
mybr east sandhel atchesonmyl ef
tboob.
Suck, blow, li
ckbl owandher epeat sthesameonmy
l
ef tboobwhi l
ehi sfi
nger spl aywi thmyni ppl e.I'm so
hor nyr i
ghtnowIwannacr ysobad.Hel ay smeon
thecar petandheki ssesmeagai n.Het ugsatt he
shor tandIl iftmybum upandher emov est hem.I 'm
l
ef tst arknaked.Hest aresatmybodyandhi sey es
l
andont hescari nmyi nnert high.It rycl osi ngmy
thighsbutheopenst hem.Heki ssest hescarwhi l
e
l
ooki ngatme.Hi sey essayi tal l.Heaccept smy
fl
aws.Heki ssesmyi nnert highst il
lIfinallyr el
ax
agai n.If eel hisbreathenearmyv agina.If idgetand
hehol
dsmyt hi
ghstokeepmei nplace.Hi
stwo
fi
nger
sseparat
emyl i
psandhelicksmyclit
.Hi
snot
i
nahur r
y.Henibbl
esonitandIarchmyback.
"
Khuzway
o."
,Imoansof
tl
y.
Helicks,
bites,
blowsandsuckonmycl i
tandI'
m
l
osingmymi ndoverher
e.Heentershi
sfir
stfi
nger
andIcurlmyt oes.Heenter
sthesecondfi
ngerandI
rol
lmyey es.
"
Fuck!
"
Hispumpi ngi nandoutwhi lehismout hisonmycl it
.
Ifeelmyl egsshaki ngandIknowI 'm aboutt ocum.
Hecur lshisfingersinsideofmeandIl etitall out
.
Hel etmer ideoutmyor gasm andIam br eat hing
heav i
ly
.Hecomesupt omyf aceandIpul lhim and
ki
sshi m.It astemy selfonhim andt hatenticesme
mor e.Iusemyt oest olowerhi spantsti
llt
heyonhi s
knees.Het akest hem of fandt hemandownt here
spri
ngsup.Idon' tknowbutIsweart hatshi treached
hisbellybuttonandIgul p.I
'venevertakenonet hat
big.
"
I'
ll
begent
le.
"
Imeethi
sey
esandhegi
vespeck.Thi
sguy
sdi
cki
s
huge!
"
Condoms?
"
Heget supandheadst ot
hevasenextt othe
pi
ctures.Hedipshi
shandinandcomesoutwi th
oneli
neofDur excondoms.Hetearsonewhi l
e
walki
ngt owardsme.Heputsi
tonwhi l
emaintaini
ng
eyecontactwithme.Hegetsi
nbet weenmyt highs
andhebal anceshi
mselfwi
thhi
sf orearms.
"Nowlist
ent ome.Ihiti
tandi
t'
smi ne.Idon'
tli
ke
shari
ng.AssoonasIputt het
ipiny ou'
remineand
minealone.Youcancallmeatmi dnightf
orsexand
I'
ll
comesi yezwana?
(weunderst
andeachot her?"
Inodatt
his.Ij
ustwanty
oui
nmer
ightnow!
"
Usey
ourwor
ds.
"
"
Siy
ezwana.
(weunder
standeachot
her
.)
"
Hekissesmeagai nandIf
eelhi
mrubhimselfonme.
It
akeadeepbr eatheandrel
axmybody.Hepushes
hi
mselfinslowlyandI'
mtryi
ngt
ogetsomeai rinmy
l
ungs.Hefinall
yenter
sful
l
yandIcat
chabr eath.He
stayslikethatgi vi
ngmet imet oadjusttohissize.I
nodathi m andhest artsmov ing.Itsuncomf ort
able
atfir
stbutaf terafewst rokesI'm amess.Heput s
myl egsonhi sshouldersgi vi
nghi m deep
penetration.I'm scr
atchingonhi sback.Iam
screami ngandI '
m surethenei ghbourscanhearme.
Ther ai
ni scr eati
ngar hythm forhisstrokes.Iarch
mybackandcur lmyt oesdiggingmynai l
sintohis
back.Hef ucksmet hroughmyor gasm.Hehasme
bymysi def acinghim.Myont opofhi sandt he
otherunderhi s.Hekeepsmov i
ngwhi l
ekeepi ngeye
contact.Ican' tevenkeepmyey esopencauset hi
s
mansst rokesar edriv
ingmecr azy.
"
LookatmeorIst
op.
"
Iopenmyeyesandlookathi
m.Hehasbeadsof
sweatonhi
sfor
eheadwithhi
sbrowsf
urr
owed.
"
Shi
tUny
ezi
!Don'
tdot
hat
!"
,hegr
oansout
.
Ij
ustclenchedmyvaginawal
lsar
oundhi
sdi
ck.He
goesfasterandhekeepspumpi
ngint
ome.
"
Fuck!Fuck!Fuuuuuuuuck!
",Iscr
eam andIcum.
Hel
aysmeonmyst
omachwi
thapi
l
lowundermy
tor
so.Heenterf
rom behindandIhearhim gr
oan.
Hischesti
sonmybackandhi sgroansaremaking
meev enmorearoused.Ipushmyhi psoutal
itt
le
andhemakesmemov ewithhi
srhythm.
"
DeeperLanga!
!Deeper
!"
Andheobli
ges.Keepi ngmyhi psi
ntheairandgivi
ng
medeepthrusts.Hegr oansoutandupshispace.I
cl
enchmyselfaroundhi m andhegroansli
kea
woundedbull
.Hel aysont opofmeaswebr eat
he
heav
il
y.Heroll
sov erandwel ookateachother.
"
Whatwast
hat
?",
Iaskwi
that
ir
edv
oice.
"
Thati
syournewaddi
cti
on.
"
Hepul l
smei nhisarmsandwesl eepont hecarpet.
Hepul l
saf l
eeceandcov ersusup.May bejust
may beIfoundamuchbet teraddicti
on.Somet hi
ng
onlyhecangi veme!Manhi sgotmeanst r
okes.Ifal
l
asl
eepbutnotbef oreIhear" Ngyakuthanda."(
Ilove
you)guessI'm al
readydreami ng.
06
UNYEZI
I'
m wokenupbysomeonepicki
ngmeup.Iopenmy
eyesali
tt
leandi
tsLanga.
"
Sor
ryt
owakey
ouupbutmybr
other
sar
ecomi
ng.
"
"
It
sokay
."
HelooksatmeandIseet heoceanandmoonagai n.
I
tstil
lfasci
natesmeonhowIcanseesucha
beauti
fulsceneryinhiseyes.Idon'
tknowwhatthi
s
warm andf uzzyfeel
ingmyhy pothal
amusissendi
ng
thr
oughoutmybody .Helaysmeont hebed.
"
Gobackt
osl
eep.
"
"
Ihav
ewor
ktomor
row.
"
"
I'
ll
fet
chy
oucl
othes.
"
"Ha.ashame.I
fIletyoudothatt
hanI'
dgotowor
k
dressedli
keIj
ustescapedoutofanasyl
um.
"
Hel
aughsatt
his.
"
Okay
.I'
l
laskNkosi
nat
hit
ochoosey
ourout
fi
tkeh.
"
"Formal okay?"
teet
hodsandkissesmyf orehead.He
l
eav est heroom onlyi
nsweatpant
sandInot icethe
scratchmar ksonhisback.Imayhavescratched
harderthanIthought.Icl
osemyey esandIfalli
nto
deepsl umberlater
.

I'
m wokenupbyl oudv oicesandIr ememberLanga
tel
lingmehi sbrother swer ecomi ngov er
.Theyar e
veryl oudwiththel aughingandal l
.Iwakeupandgo
tot hebathroom towashmyf ace.Iopendr awersti
ll
Ifindaseal edtoothbr ush.Ibr ushmyt eethand
deci detotakeashower .Ifinishtaki ngashowerand
whenIwal koutt herei sstil
l noiseont heot hersi
de.I
textLanga" I'
m hungr y.
"her epl i
es" comeeat .We
braai edmeat .
"uyahl anyaloandIt extagain
"Qui cki
e?"hebluet icksme.I 'm sitt
ingt hereall
nakedwhent hedoorf i
nallyopens.Il aughathi m
causeIcanseehi sbonert hroughhi spant s.
"
Real
l
yUny
ezi
?"
"
Thatwastheonl
ywayt
ogety
out
ocomeher
e.I
'
m
r
eal
lyhungr
y."
Hegr
oansoutl
oudandhasami
nit
ant
rum.
"
CanIgett
hequi
cki
e?Thany
ou'
l
leat
."
"
Nope.
",
Isaypoppi
ngt
he"
p".
Ist
andupandheadf ort
hecl
oset
.Inot
icemy
cl
othes.Gr
eatchoi
ce.
"Langast
opf
oll
owi
ngmear
ound.Thanksf
ort
he
clot
hes.
"
"
MaGemangi
zoy
ifakakancane.
"(I
'
llputt
het
ipi
n.)
Il
aughathim andgot
hroughhi
sswagpant
s.It
ake
outt
heblackone.
"
Awuf
uni
?"(
Youdon'
twantt
o?)
Inodandbendt otakeoutapairofsocksf
rom t
he
drawer.If
eelhimrubhisboneronmyassandmy
breat
hehitches.
"
Seducemeal
lyouwantLanga.
"
"
MaGemaI
'
m dy
ingher
e."
Ifi
ndthesocksandputthem on.Ipushhi
m wi
thmy
assasIstandup.AsI'
m abouttowearthe
swagpant
shegr abst
hem.
"
Langa!
"
"
Ngy
akucel
a.Bheka.
"(Pl
ease.Look.
)
Ilookathi
sbonerandI'
mt emptedkodwasexwon'
t
makemyst omachful
l.Thelastt
imeIatewaswit
h
thatchi
sanyamameat.
"
Langayourbrot
heraredownstair
sandI'
m hungry
.
Ngi
zobengit
hi"Aaah"isi
susami si
besi
thi"
grr
r"hayi
!
"
(I
'l
lbesayi
ng-myst omachwil
l besayi
ng-no!)
Hel
aughsandhandsmet
heswagpant
s.
"
Cany
oucookpapf
orus?
"
"
Ican'
tcook.
"
Helooksatmeasi fIj
ustpour
edcol
dwateronhi
m
andIwannalaughsobad.Ofcour
seIcancookI'
m
j
ustpull
i
nghisleg.
"I
'
llaskoneofmyst
affatt
hechi
sany
amat
obr
ing
uspapthen.
"
"
Sot
heChi
sany
amai
syour
s?"
Henodstaki
ngouthi
sphone.Iunder
standwhyhe
sai
d'weownthi
splace'
ear
li
eron.
"
I'
mjoki
ng.I
'
llcook.
"
Hest
opspr
essi
ngonhi
sphoneandl
ooksatme.
"
You'
resur
e?"
Hi
sscepti
calIcansee.Ismi
leandnodathi
m.Ipul
l
at
-shi
rtonandwewal kouthandi
nhand.
"
Howmanyar
ethey
?"
"
Who?Mybr
other
s?"
Inod.
"Ther
e's5ofus.I
'
mt hemiddl
echil
dandt
hel
ast
bornisagi
rl
.Shedidn'
tcomethou.
"
Myfacedrops.I
'
llbesur
roundedbyt
est
eor
oneal
l
al
one?DearGod.
"Theyi
nsist
edoncominghereandwhenIt oldt
hem
Ihadagirlovert
heyr
anhereevenThandolezwe
wantedtocomebutsinceshehasschoolshecan'
t.
"
IguessThandol
wez
eist
hegi
rl
.
"
Whywoul
dtheyr
unher
eforamer
egi
rl
?"
Hel
ooksatmeandhi
sgi
vi
ngmeoneoft
hose
i
ntensel
ooksandIl
ookdown.
"
Ngi
bheke.
(l
ookatme)
"
Il
ookathi
m andhegr
absmebyt
hewai
st.
"It
oldt
hem aboutyouwhenIsawy ouout
side
Khuzwayosbui
ldi
ngandthey'
vebeenwait
ingforme
tofi
ndyou."
"Whytel
lthem aboutmeordoyoutel
lthem about
ever
ygir
ly oumeetoutsi
debui
l
dings?
"
"
Itel
lthem aboutasmokerwhoseest
heoceani
n
myeyes."
Il
ookathi
m andheki
ssesmyl
i
ps.Wai
t-
"
Howdoy
ouknowIseet
heoceani
nyourey
es?
"
"
You'
l
lfi
ndout
."
We'vebeenstandi
nginthepassaget
hiswholetime.
Ipull
hishandandwewal ktowardst
heli
vingroom.
Itst
oppedrai
ningbuti
tsdri
zzli
ngnow.Theyplayi
ng
FIFAandareooingandbooing.
"
Iwantasmoke.
",Iwhi
spert
oLanga.
"
Aft
ert
his.
"
Wewalkuptot
hem andLangacl
ear
shi
sthr
oat
.No
onepai
datt
ent
ion.
"
Baf
wet
hu.
"(Br
other
s)
Theyall
lookatusandpausethegame.I
'
m st
andi
ng
ther
einhugeclot
heslooki
ngall
shor
twit
hmessy
hair
.
"
Thi
sisUny
ezi
Sosi
bo.
"
"Hey"
,andmyv
oicecomesoutsqeauky
.Wt
f
bazal
wane?
Oneofthem l
aughs.Hel
ookslikehi
sinhis20s.Di
d
Imenti
onthattheyl
ookal
ike?Theresemblancei
s
deep.
"
Uhl
ekani
sli
ma?
(whatar
elaughi
ngatf
ool
)"
IpinchLangaandhejumpsandgi
vesmeadeat
h
starewhichIgi
veback.
"Hey"
,theguyi
mit
atesmysqueakyvoi
ceandt
heyall
l
aughLangaevenchuckl
es.I
'
m gonnapuncht
hese
asshol
es.
"Squeakyvoi
ceherewil
lcookpapf
ory
'al
l
.Y'
al
l
bet
terkeepqui
et.
",
Isay
.
Theyal
lkeepqui
et.Ismi
l
e.
"
Goodboy
s."
Langachuckl
es.
"
Nowwhatar
eyournames?
"
"
I'
m Ndabenkul
u."
,say
stheol
derl
ooki
ngone.
"
I'
m Bheki
khay
a."
,say
sonewi
that
att
ooonhi
sneck.
"
I'
m Khul
ekani
."
,say
sTr
evorNoahwannabe.
"
Nicet
omeety
oual
l
."
Khul
ekani
looksatLanga.
"Sot
hisi
swher
eyougott
hosebackscr
atchesf
rom
huh?
"
Omigosh!Thi
skidthou.Ihi
demyfacebehindLanga
asever
yonelaughs.Whyisthi
sdumbasslaughi
ng
too?
"
Okayguysyekani
uMaGemawami .Asambe
mkami
.(l
eav
emyMaGemaal one.Let'
sgomywi
fe.
)"
"
MmmhMaGemaWami
.Mkami
.Wadl
abaf
o."
Theyl
aughagai
n.GuessKhul
ekani
ist
hej
oker
aroundhere.Ileavet hem thereandgot othekitchen.
IfIwasreall
ylighti
nski nI'
dber edrightnow.Iopen
thekit
chenwi ndowandl i
ghtacigarette.Iboilt
he
watersolongandsi tont opofthecount er
.Wher eis
thatwine?I'
l
ldr i
nkonegl asscauseIhav ewor k
tomorrow.Istartcooki ngwhensomet hinglicksmy
calveandIscream bl oodyshit!Idon'tev enlook
backIrun.Theyal lstandupandpul loutguns.I
standbehindLanga.
"
What
'swr
ongUny
ezi
?"
"Somet
hing.
..I
tli
ckedme.Angazi
..
.It
..
.Ybo!
"(Idon'
t
know)
Iam f
reaki
ngoutwhenahearawhi
ne.Adogswhi
ne.
"
It
'sj
ustPl
utobabe.
"
Pl
uto?What
'shedoi
nghere?Icomeoutandthere
hei
swithhi
searsdownandtailbet
weenhi
stail
.
"
Aahst
handwasami
.Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?"
Iki
sshi
sheadandr
ubonhi
sbel
l
y.Hel
i
cksmyf
ace.
"
Plut
o!"
,I
'
m agi
ggl
i
ngmess.
Wef
inal
l
yst
oppl
ayi
ng.ManIl
ovet
hisf
ell
ow.
"Hewhinedandstar
tedbar
kingwhenhesawme.
Guessherecogni
zedmef r
om ear
li
eronsoIt
ook
him wi
th.
"
Langat
hou.
"
ThanksIguess.
"
"
Can'
tbeli
eveIpul
ledoutmygunforadog.
Abaf
azi
.(
women) "
,say
sNdabenkhul
usi
tt
ingdown.
Theyl
aughandgetbackt
othei
rgame.Iwasscar
ed
awu!
"
Khuzway
o."
Theyal
ltur
nbackandIl
ookdownshy
ly.
"Oh.She'stal
ki
ngt
oLanagal
akhel
i
hle.
",say
s
Bhekikhaya.
Hest
andsupandf
oll
owsmewi
thPl
utoonourt
ail
.
"
I'
m al
mostdonewi
tht
hepappl
easewar
m upt
he
meatf
orme."
"
Okay
."
Heholdsmywaistfr
om behi
ndandki
ssesmyneck.
Mybreathi
nghi
tchesandhebit
esdownonmyneck.
Ifi
ndthepainpleasur
ableandheki ssesitafter.I
tur
naroundandki sshi
m.Hegr opesmyassandI
moan.JustasI'
m getti
ngintoithepullsoutand
putst
hemeati ntheoven.Didhejust-?Hej ustgave
meat asteofmyownmedi ci
ne!IswearI'm gonna
cry
.Idragmytonguet hr
oughmyt eethandt urnto
mypot s.
"
Uthimxm ki
mi?(
youdraggi
ngmethr
oughy our
t
eeth?
)",
hesaysl
ooki
ngatmewithsqui
ntedeyes.
"
Hm.
mh(
no)
"
Hegi vesmeonel ookandget sbackt ocooking.I
fi
nishupt hepapandt urnoffghdstove.Plutoisjust
l
ayingt herelooki
ngatus.Ial socookedchakal aka
andi tsdone.Iturnoffthepot sandstar
trinsi
ngt he
pl
at es.Langalightsacigarett
ewhi l
ewaiti
ngont he
ti
mer .Idrytheplatesandst artset
ti
ngthem.Idi sh
upf oreveryoneandwhenI '
m donet heti
mergoes
off
.It akethecigaret
tef r
om him ashetakest he
meatout .
"
Whenar
eyoupl
anni
ngonqui
tt
ing?
"
"
Qui
tt
ingwhat
?"
"
Ugway
i.
(ci
gar
ett
es)
"
"
WhenIf
eel
li
kei
t.
",
Isaydi
smi
ssi
vel
y.
"
Wat
chy
ourt
one.Angi
l
wi.
(I
'm notf
ight
ing)
"
Iputtheci
gar
etteoutandcl
oset
hewi
ndow.Imake
adishcl
othwet.
"You'
rehelpi
ngmewithgiv
ingthem f
ood.AndI
shoul
dn'tevenbedoi
ngthi
s.I'
m notyourwi
fe.
"
"
Tol
dyout
omar
ryme.
"
Il
eavehi
ml i
kethatandgogivehisbr
otherst
hewet
di
shcl
othfort
heirhands.HowIknowthis?Ir
eada
coupl
eofstor
ies.
"Si
yabongaMkakhe.
(t
hanky
ouhi
swi
fe.
)"
,say
s
Khulekani
.
Ismil
eatt
hem andgobackt
otheki
tchen.Langai
s
eat
ing.
"
Pat
ience.Pat
ienceLanga.
"
"WhenI'
m hungry
.Iwanttoravi
shmyf
oodr
ight
away.
"andy eshemadeitsexual
.
Hel
i
ckshi
sfi
nger
ssl
owl
ywhi
l
elooki
ngmei
nthe
ey
es.SeducemeLangaKhuzway
o.Seduceme.
"
Ngabengikunambit
hakanj
e.(
I'
dbeeat
ingy
oul
i
ke
t
his.
)"
,hesaysbi
ti
ngint
ohiswors.
Ineedt
ogetoutofhere.Ver
yfast
.Igr
abt
wopl
ates
andputt
hem onthetr
ay .
"
Ngi
kukhot
akanj
e.(
li
cki
ngy
oul
i
ket
his.
)"
Helickshi
sfi
nger
ssl owl
y.That
'smycue.Itaket
he
pl
atesandwalkout.Ihandthem t
hei
rpl
ates.
"
Uri
ghtMaGema?Youl
ookf
lust
ered.
"
Inodandwal koff.Ibumpi ntoLangawi t
hat rayof
platesandhel i
ckshi sli
pandbi teshislipbefore
walkingoff.Jesus!Yoursonwi l
lbet hedeathofme.
Wher earemyci garettes?Igiveplutosomewat er
andr awhalfcookedmeat .Langaj usttookmydog
withouttakinghisfood.Hewal ksi nasIl i
ghtup
ci
gar et
te.
"
Wozauzodl
a.(
comeeat
.)
"
"
I'
ll
eatwi
thPl
uto.
"
"
Plut
o.Come.
"
Plutolooksathi sfoodandt hanLanga.Hi s
i
ndeci siv
e.Hef inall
ychoosesfood.Hah!Langaexits
defeated.Af t
eraf ewmi nut
esever y
onecomewi th
theirplatesandpul l
sbarstoolsbeforetaki
ngaseat.
Ilookatt hem puzzled.Langamar a!Theyallsmi
l
eat
meshowi ngoffthei
rdimples.
"Iwoul
dbewatchi
ngsoccerwhil
eeati
ngbutLanga
saysyou'
rel
onel
y.
",
say
sKhulekani.
Il
ookatLangaandhewinksatme.Heli
kespl
ayi
ng
di
rt
ylo.Iputt
heci
gar
ett
eoutandclosethewi
ndow.
"You'
ll
havetostopsmokingwhenyou'
repr
egnant
."
,
saysNdabenkhulucausi
ngmetochokeonmyown
Sali
va.
"
Uhm.
..Yeahy
eah.
",Iam f
lushedguy
s.
Isi
tdownandweeatpeacef
ull
y.
"Langasay
sy'
all
aredat
ing.You'r
esur
eyouwanna
beinthi
sfami
ly
?",
asksBhekikhay
a
Wedati
ng?IlookatLangaandhesmi
l
esatme.
Hai
bo.Thi
sisambush.
"
Uhy
eahy
eahwedat
ing.I
'
m notr
eal
l
ysur
ebutI
don'
twannamakehast
ydeci
sions.
"
"
Whatdoy
ouseei
nhi
sey
es?
",
asksNdabenkhul
u
"
Baf
o",
Langat
ri
esst
oppi
nghi
m.
"Thul
abaf
o.(
qui
etbr
other
)",
Ndabenkhul
ucut
shi
m
off.
"Idon'
tknowi
fthissoundscrazybutIseet
heocean
andthemoon.Itsti
l
lleavesmepuzzledwhy.
",Isay
thisl
ooki
ngatLanga.Stari
ngint
otheoceanandt he
moon.
"
Yout
hinkuy
ebaf
o?"
,asksKhul
ekani
.
"
SizozwangoKhuzwayoomdala.Bekunj
alo.
Makashadwe.(
we'l
lhearf
rom seni
orKhuzwayo.I
fit
i
swhatis.Shemustbemar r
ied.)
",
answers
Ndabenkhul
u.
Idon'
tknowwhatt heytal
kingaboutbutIknowi t
i
nvolv
esme.Il ookatLangaandhel ooksatmet oo.
Igetafeeli
ngthati
nhisoceany oudon'tswi
m and
l
eave.Youlearnhowt obreat
heunderwat er
.Leav i
ng
hi
m willbehardinthefut
urebutwhywoul dIleave
hi
m?Iaskmy sel
fthatquesti
onagain'whywoul dI
l
eavehim?'
.Il
ookatPl
utoandhelooksatme.Plut
o.
Idon'
tknowwhatIj
ustwal
kedint
obutitsst
il
lyou
andme.Always.
07
UNYEZI
I'
m pr eparingforwor kri
ghtnowandLangai ssti
ll
sleeping.Thi smansnor esbant ase.Ihadt oput
anot herpill
owf orhi m.Iputonmycl othesandIgo
checkonPl ut
o.Hei salr
eadyupandbar kingatthe
door .Irunt owardsi tandopeni tforhi m andher uns
outt othebacky ard.Itstoppedr ainingnow.I tswindy
thou.Igi vehim somepr iv acyandl eavet hedoor
open.Iwal ktotheki tchen.I t
sst i
ll05:43soIst art
cooki ngsof tporri
dge.Lucki l
ytheyboughtmyl aptop.
IcheckMrMay asschedul efortheday .He'l
lbeout
oftheof f
icetoday .Iemai l hi
m hisschedul eandhi s
fi
rstmeet i
ngi switht heboar dmember swhi chisa
privatemeet i
ng.Iturnof ft hepotswheni tsready.I
dishupf ormy selfandaddmi lkandsomesugar .As
I'
m eat i
ngLangacomesi n.
"
Sawubona.
"(Hey
)
"
Mor
ning.
"
"
Whyi
sthedooropen?
"
"
Plut
oneededt
het
oil
et.I
'
llcl
eani
tup.
"
"
Ther
eisaGar
dnerf
ort
hat
."
Inodathi
m.
"
Youwantsomesof
tpor
ri
dge?
"
"
Hay
i.Ieatmeatmi
na.
"
Amen!Het akesoutsomeRussiansandpopsthem
i
nthemi cr
owav e.Act
ionsofabachel
or.I
ts06:
22
andIneedtoleaveforwork.
"
Canyoudropmeof
fatwor
kthandr
opof
fPl
utoat
t
heest
ate?
"
Henodseat
ingRussi
ansonl
y.
"Andt
hewayy ouambushedmei zol
o.Idi
dn'
tev
en
knowsiy
ajol
a.(
yest
erday
.dat
ing)
"
"
IknowIknow.Uny
ezi
pleasebemygi
rl
fr
iend?
"
Langamar
ayazi
!Whatam Igonnadowi
thhi
m?
"
OkayLangal
akhel
i
hle.
"
"
Sor
ryst
handwasami
."
Hepul
l
smebyt hewaistandki
ssesme.Inev
erget
t
ir
edofhi
ski
sses.Ipackupmyt hi
ngs.
"
Putashi
rtonasambe.
(l
et'
sgo)
"
Heki
ssesmeonel
astt
imeandwal
ksof
f.
"
Plut
o!"
Hecomesmi
nut
esl
ater
.
"
Timet
ogo.
"
Wher
eismyphone?AsI'
m aboutt
ogolookf
ori
tin
t
hebedr
oom Langawal
ksinwit
hitonhi
sear
.
"Lal
elandoda.Hl
ukananomkami .Uphinde
umphounelekuzoci
thekaigazi
.(
li
stenhereman.St
ay
awayf r
om mywife.Call
heragainbloodwill
be
spil
t.
)"
Hedr opsthecall
,takeshiscarkey sandl eaves.It
s
probablyZenande.Hist heonlyonet hatcall
sme.
Thabani j
ustwaitsformycal l
.Hehoot sandmeand
Plutoheadout.Iopent hedoorf orPlutoattheback
andIgeti nfr
ont.Hisjawsar eclenchedandt heway
hi
sgr i
ppi
ngonthatst ari
ngwheel I'
m ev enscaredto
askf ormyphone.Hei sdri
vi
ngv eryfastandIdon' t
event el
lhi
mt oslowdown.Pl ut
oi ssleepi
ngatt he
backandIwi shIwashi m.Obliv
ioust othismans
anger.Thetyr
esscr
eechwhenhepar ksneart he
Khuzway oLawandOr der.Isitt
her
elookingathim.I
don'
tknowwhatt osaysoIki sshischeekandexi t
thecar.Hedri
vesoffwi t
hmyphone.Il ookathiscar
dri
vi
ngof fbef
orewalkingoff.It
sgonnabeal ong
day.

Iwasaboutknockof
fwhenIr
ecei
vedacal
lfr
om my
off
icephone.
"
MsSosi
bo.MrKhuzway
oisher
etot
akey
ouhome.
"
Iguessthatidioti
sher etofetchme.Ipack
every
thi
ngandt ur
nof fmycomput er.MrMay ahas
al
readyleftthebuil
dingsoIheadt ot heelevat
or.
Thisisv
er ylar
gebuilding.Withmyy earsofwor ki
ng
hereIst
illdon'
tknowt heowner .Theycallhim seni
or
Khuzway othatknowhi m.Iex i
tthebuildi
ngandhei s
outsi
desmoki ng.We'relookingateachot herasI
walkupt ohim.Istandi nfr
ontofhi m.
"
Eveni
ng.
"
"
Yeah.
"
Heopensthedoorformebef oregoingtohisside.
Hestar
tsthecaranddri
vesof f
.Wear esil
entinthe
car
.Idon'
tgetwhyhisangryreall
y.Hejustcame
waytoofasti
nmyl i
feIdi
dn'tevenhav et
imetocut
cer
tai
npeopleoff
.
"
Langal
akhel
i
hle.
"
Hest eal
saglanceatmebeforelooki
ngbackatt
he
road.EThekwi
niisabuzz.Peopl
eareknocki
ngoff
andsomear egoingtowork.
"Youcan'
tbeangryatme.Youcameinduel
if
eli
ke
anatomicbomb.Ididn'
tev
enhavet
imetocut
cert
ainpeopl
eoff
."
"
I'
m notangryatyou.I
'
mj usttr
yingt
ocomeint
o
t
ermsthattherewereotherguysbef
oreme.
"
"
Don'
tst
orm of
fonme.Yout
alkt
ome.
"
"
Iknow.I
'
m sor
ry.
"
"
I'
m sor
ryt
oo.
"
Heent
erst
heest
ateandpar
ksi
nfr
ontofapar
tment
.
"
Woul
dyoul
i
ket
ocomeupf
orcof
fee?
"
"
Not
hanky
ou.I
'
llcal
ll
ater
."
Hesayshandi
ngmeaphone.Thi
sisnotmyphone.
I
tsevenknew.
"Ev
eryt
hingi
nther
eisy
our
s.Igotandsmashedy
our
phone.
"
I'
ml ooki
ngathi m def
eat
ed.Amen.Itr
yopeni
ngthe
doorbutitslocked.Hegrabsmyfaceandki
ssesme.
Ikisshim andwebr eaki
toffl
ater
.
"
Ngy
akut
handaMaGema.
"
Idon'trepl
ybutj
ustl
ooki
nhisey es.Thewavesare
calm andthemoonbeaut
if
ul.Igetthatwar
mf uzz
y
feel
ingagain.
"
Ulal
ekahl
e(sl
eepwel
l
).
Iexi
tthecarandhedr i
vesoffonl
ywhenIshutt he
doorbehindme.Iam metbyasl eepi
ngNanaand
Plut
o.Idon'twakethem upasIundress.Ist
arton
thepotsandl i
ghtupasmoke.Iam donecooking
anddishupf ormeandNana.Iwakeherup.
"
Hey
.Youhungr
y?"
"
YesUny
ezi
."
Ihandhert
hepl
ateandwest
arteat
ing.
"Thatguywhocamet
ofet
chy
ourcl
othedandPl
uto.
Yourrecent
?"
"
Hismyboy
fri
end.
"
Shelooksatmesur pri
sed.Ican'tr
emembert helast
ti
meIhadaboy fri
enditev ensoundsweirdsayingit
.
Weeatandshel eaveslater.Ir
entamov ieon
BoxOffi
ceandcuddlewi t
hPl ut
o.I'
m cry
inghalfway
themov i
e.Acal
ldistur
bsme.Ihav etochangethis
ri
ngtoneonthi
sphone.Thecal l
erI
Di swrit
ten
"myeniwami"i
yafananoLangakehl eh.
"
Myeni
wam?
"
"
Mkami
.Yousoundl
i
key
ouwer
ecr
ying.
"
"
Iwaswat
chi
ngar
omant
icmov
ie.
"
"
Phoukhal
elani
?"(
whyar
eyoucr
ying?
)
"
It
ssad.
"
Helaughsatme.Wet
alkt
il
lIf
all
asl
eep.Ir
eal
l
y
adorethi
sman.
08
LANGALAKHELI
HLE
Ijustgotof ft hephonewi t hUny ezi.Ijusthopeshe' s
thechosenonef orme.Ther eal onet hist i
me.The
Khuzway ocl ani scursedorbl essed.Ourgr eatgreat
greatgr andf at herwasawi tchdoct or.Hi sfir
stwi f
e
hadhadanaf fairwithhisbr ot herandmadekhokho
believethati twashi schildrenf ory ears.Whenhe
methi ssecondwi feshehadgi venhi m ason.
Secr etsdon' tst ayhiddenf orev ersohef oundout
thatt hekidswer enothi sbuthi sbr others.Heputa
curseont hef ollowinggener ation.Khuzway omen
andwomenshal lneverhav echi ldreni fnotwi ththei
r
'
chosenones' .Nkosi nathiandLangal ami aren'tmy
biological sons.Bongekat r
ickedmei ntobel i
ev i
ng
shewast he' chosenone' .Shehadhear dKhuzway o
omdal atalkingt oNdabenkhul uaboutt hisand
startedsay ingst ufflikesheseest hemooni nmy
eyes.Shef ell pregnantwi thNkosi nat hiandknowi ng
she'st hechosenIwashappy .WhenNkosi nathiwas
bornhel ookedl ikeher .Ourgenesar ev eryst r
ong
butIt houghtmay beher sar est ronger .Wi t
hher
upholdi ngt he'I'mt hechosenone' actdadaskedt o
meetherandshehadusal lfool edtrustme.When
wewant edt opaydowr ysoshecanof f
iciallybemy
wifeshesai dshewaspr egnantandpost ponedt he
whol ethi ng.Fort hebaby '
ssakeweagr eed.When
Langal ami wasbor nhel ookednot hinglikeus.
Womenandt heirlies,
shesai dhel ookedl ikeher
deadgr andf atherandhermot herbackedherupon
that.Ist arteddr eami ngofanol dmani nheal er
clot
hingt elli
ngmet ogetr idoft hesnakei nmy
house.Idi dn'tgett hisandnei therdi dIknowt hisold
manbutIcoul dseehewasoft heKhuzway ofamily.
WhenIhadat alkwi thdadanddescr ibedt heol d
manhet oldmei twasukhokho.Weconsul tedwi t
h
ourauntwhoi nher i
tedt hegi f
t.Shesai dshehas
beenwai t
ingonus.Idi dn'treallybel i
evei nal lthi
s
Sangomast uff.Wewer el etinont hemat tert hat
hist
or yhasr epeat editsel f
.Theki dswer enotmi ne.
Bongekawasn' tthechosenone.Idi dn'tbel ieveall
that.WehadDNAt estsdonesecr etlyandt her esul
ts
confirmedev erything.Possessedbymygr eatgreat
grandfat her sspiritIkil
ledBongeka.Wef akedher
escape.Nobodyknowsofherdeat h.Itshal lr
emai n
thatway .Wegoi ngt oeChamt ut ov i
sitouraunt .She
mustconf irm Uny ezi sassumpt i
onsonwhatshe
seesi nmyey es.Ihopeshe' st heonecauseI 've
fal
lenhar d.Inev erl ov edaf terBongeka.Iwasa
smashandl eav eki ndaguy .Uny ezi wasjustthat
l
ightatt heendoft hedar kness.Iknowi t
st ooear ly
tomar ryher .Wi thal lthei nformat i
onIhav eonherI
sti
lldon'tknowherpar entswher eabouts.Ihav emy
goonssear chi ngf orSosi bosi nKZN.I '
venev ermeta
Sosibobef ore.Ihadt ogoogl ehercl annames.I
headt ot heboy sgamer oom andt heyplayingvideo
games.It ookt hem i nasmyownchi l
dren.Inev er
hidthef actthatI '
m nott hei
rr eal f
ather.Wentasf ar
asaski ngt hem i ft heywoul dl iketomeett heirfather
andt heydecl ined.Theyst aywi t
hmei nourhousei n
Yell
owWood.I '
mf il
t hyr i
chbutt hatsast oryfor
anotherday .
"
Baba.
",Nkosi
nat
hical
l
sout
.
"Baf
anabam(myboy s)
."
,Isaysit
ti
ngonaduf
felbag
andruf
fl
ingLangashai
rcausinghimtohi
tmyhand.
"
Y'al
ll
iv
ingal
ready
?",
asksLangal
ami
"Yes.Gogowil
lbeher
etolookaft
ery'
al
l.uSbhamu
uyezanaye(
sbhamuiscomingtoo)
."
"
OkayBaba.Uphi
uAunt
(wher
eisaunt
y?)
"
"
That
'sy
ourmot
herNkosi
nat
hi.Hernamei
sUny
ezi
."
"
Wehav
eamot
her
?",
asksLanga.
"
Yesboy
s.You'
l
lmeethersoon.
"
Theynodandgetbackt
oplay
ingthei
rgames.That'
s
mycue.Iexi
tandheadout
.Il
eaveamessageont he
fr
idge.
"Thi
sisUnyezi
snumber.Cal
lheri
fyouneed
anyt
hingandcan'
treachme.**
***
****
*"
Iwalkoutandgeti ntomycaraf teralert
ingthe
securi
tyofmydepar t
ure.Idri
vetoKhuzway os
house.Weleavingt odayanddon' tknowwhenwi l
l
comeback.Ididn'ttellUnyeziI
'ml eavi
ng.I'
llexpl
ain
whenIcomeback.Foroncei nmyl i
feIpraytoGod
thatUnyezii
stheone.Shehast obe.Ev enifshe's
notI'
m stay
ingwithher .FuckKhokho.
09
UNYEZI
Iknockedof faboutanhouragoandI 'mt ryi
ngtocal l
Langaagai nandhi sphonegoest ovoicemai lagain.
IknowIshoul dgiveupcal l
ingsinceitsbeent wo
dayswi thhi m MIAbutIam wor ri
ed.I'
m st uff
ingmy
faceandI '
m amess.Iwasr eleasedear l
yatwor k
todaycauseIhadabr eakdown.MrMay awentasf ar
asgi vingmesomet i
meof fwor k.Iam stuf f
ingmy
facewi t
hpancakesImade.I tsabi tl
atef or
pancakesbutIdon' tcare.Pl ut
oi swithNana.My
moodi sset t
inghi m offandIdon' twantt hat.Itext
Langaagai n"Langapl easeanswermycal l
sand
texts.Ify ou'reignoringmet hanmanupt ellmewhat
Idid."Isendi tanddeci det ocal lhim again.Itsstil
l
goest ov oicemai l
.Ileaveamessage" Khuzway o.
Arey ouokay ?Whyar eyoui gnor i
ngme? !LangaI 'l
l
shooty oui ny ourfuckenscr otum ifyoudon' tcallme
back!"Ij ustcr yanddr opt hecal l.Whatifhi shur t
?
Hedi dsaynotev eryonelikest heKhuzway os.I'
m
disturbedbymyphoner inging.Ianswerwi t
hout
checki ngt hecal l
erID.
"
Langa?
"
"
Uhchanganey
am.UMam'
Thandi
lo.
"
"
Oh.
"I'
m al
i
ttl
ebi
tdi
sappoi
nted.
"
Iwor
kforMrLanga.I
'
m hi
ski
dsnanny
."
"
Ohokayma.I
shear
ound?I
sheokay
?"
"No.Helef
twithhisfatherandbrother
stoat t
enda
famil
ymatter
.Ijustgotacal lt
hat
..
.that.
..t
hatmy
husbandhasdiedand...i
-i
-ihav
etogohomet o
prepar
eforhi
sbur i
al.
"
"
Iunder
standma.
"
"Cantheki
dsstaywi
thyou?Langasai
dweshoul
d
call
youifweneedanyt
hing.
"
Ikeepquiet.I
'
veonlymetNkosinathionceandwe
didn'
ttal
k.Ihavetol
ookaf t
ertwoboy swhodon't
evenknowwhot hefuckIam?!I'
m gonnakil
lLanga!
"
Uhma.
"
"
Ngy
ak'
cel
anganey
am.
(pl
easemychi
l
d.)
"
Isi
ghandr
ubmygl
abel
l
a.
"
Okayma.Pl
easesendt
headdr
ess.
"
"
Thanky
ou.
"
"
I'
ll
bet
her
etof
etcht
hem soon.
"
Ihearhercal
lNkosi
nathi
.Therei
sshuf
fl
ingont
he
otherl
inebef
oreavoicespeaks.
"
Ma.UNkosi
nat
hil
o."
Ma?Langa!
"
Yesboy
.Uh.
..I
'
llf
etchy
'al
lokay
?Sendt
headdr
ess.
"
"
Okayma.
"
Idropthecal l
.Ma?KuUny eziSosibo?Idon' teven
botherchangingoutoft hi
sonesi eassoonasI
receiv
et headdress.Igrabmycarkey sandi nf
orm
NanaI '
llbeoutforaf ew.Theystayiny el
lowwood
andmyl i
ttl
ecardoesn'tfi
tinthi
sneighbor hood.The
wallsarehigh.It
sdeadqui ethere.Nosoundofa
chil
dpl ayi
ng.Nothing.Notevenmusi c.Iparkinfront
ofav erytall
gate.Ipresstheint
ercom.
"
Uny
ezi
.I'
m her
etof
etcht
heki
ds.
"
Thegat
eopensupormay
bet
hef
ir
stgat
eopensup.
I'
mi nstruct edtogetoutoft hecarandIdoso.My
carissear chedandt heyfi
nall
yletmeinwhent hey
seeitssaf e.Iam metbyal ongdrivewayandIam
l
ooki ngatt hi
shouseandIhav etosay.Ionlysee
theseki ndofhousesonHomeChannel .Iparkmyt oy
carandwal koutlookingli
keIranfrom theasy l
um.
Therear esecur itywithgunsstandi
ngst i
lli
n
positions.I '
mv erycuri
ousofLangasoccupat ionand
bankbal ancer i
ghtnow.Iam metbyat all
scaryman
bythedoor .
"
Uh.Hi
."
"
MaGemawakhe.I
gamauSbhamu.
"
Sbhamu?Whatkindofnameisthat?Heshoul
d'
ve
namedhimsel
f'Skhal
i
'causehelooksl
i
keaweapon.
"
Wewi l
laccompanyyouwit
h3SUVswit
hmymen
i
nsi
de.Wear et
oinsur
eyoursaf
ety
."
Ij
uststar
eatt
hismanwidemouthed.SUVs?Ionl
y
seethoseonmovi
es.It
hinkI
'
m gonnafai
nt.
"
You'
reokay
?"
Inodf
astmaki
ngmedi
zzi
er.
"
Shi
t!
",
Isaybal
anci
ngmy
sel
fwi
tht
hewal
l
.
"
Letmehel
pyou.
"
Hehelpsmei nsideanditsbeaut i
ful
ashel l
.Thetil
es
aresocleanIcanseemy sel
f.Hesi t
smeont he
couch.Ifeell
i
kear oachont hesewhi t
ecoaches.He
comesbackwi t
hawomani nherl at
e40s.Shel ooks
verybeauti
fulbutyoucan'tmissthedar kbagsunder
hereyes.IguesssheisMam' Thandi
.Shehandsme
aglassofwat erandIdri
nkitdown.
"
Thanky
ouf
orcomi
ng.
"
"
It
sokayma.
"
"
Baf
ana!
",Sbhamucal
l
sout
.
Ihearfoot
stepsandthedraggi
ngofasui tcase.I
l
ookupandy oucanseetheupstai
rs.Iswearthat
stai
rcasei
smadeofmar ble.Nkosi
nathiandav er
y
cuteboycomesdown.Theyst andnexttoSbhamu.
"
SawubonaMa.
",t
heysaysi
mul
taneousl
y.
"
Uhheyhey
.Youokay
?"
"
Yeboma.
",answer
sNkosi
nat
hi.
"Youwill
bestayi
ngwit
hmet i
ll
yourfat
hercomes
back.Anduh.
..Si
nceschool
isclosedI
'
llt
akesome
ti
meof fwor
k."
"
Babasai
dyouar
eourmom.Ar
eyou?
",
say
sthel
i
ttl
e
f
ell
ow.
Il
ookatSbhamuandMam'
Thandi
andt
heyj
ustl
ook
atme.
"
I-
uh.Yes.Iam y
ourmom f
rom nowon.
"
OhJehov
ah!Iam sweat
ingr
ightnow.
"
Let
s..
.Let
'sgo.
"
Sbhamut
akest
hei
rsui
tcaseandl
eadst
hem out
side.
"
Ma.Aretheyal
l
ergi
ctoany
thi
ng?Ar
etheychoosy
wheni
tcomestofood?"
"No.Theyeatanyt
hingaslongastherei
smeat .
Theirbankcar
disintheotherbag.I
tsablackcar
d
sonopasswor dneeded.
"
Didshej ustsay?Nowaytheseki
dshav eablack
card!Idon'tevenhav
eonemy sel
f!Inodandwal k
outside.TheSUVsarereadyandthekidsareinmy
car.Igetinandlookatt
hem thr
ought her
earv i
ew
mi rr
or.Theyjustsittherel
ookingatme.Lor dbewi th
me.Idr iveoffwit
ht hecarsfoll
owi ngbehindme.I '
m
playingsomeDr akei nthecarandNkosi nathisings
along.Goodt astey ouhavekid.Iexplaintot he
guar dsabouttheSUVsandIl ieabi t
.Idriveinand
theyf ol
lowbehind.Whenwegetoutt heygoi nfirst
tochecki feveryt
hingissafe.I'
v eneverbeeni nt his
situati
onbefore.Inot i
ceAndrewandNanawal king
towar dsuswi t
hPlut oonthei
rt ail
.Imisshim.Bef ore
theyev enreachust heyarestopped.
"
Iknowt
hem.I
tsokay
."
Theyarel
etthr
oughandPlut
obarksatthesemen.
Hisanxi
ousIcantel
lbyhi
stai
landthehaironhi
s
back.
"
It
sokayPl
uto.Comeher
e."
HerunstomeandIbrushhimti
l
lhi
sabi
tcal
m.St
il
l
doesn'
ttr
ustt
hesest
ranger
s.
"
Youcanent
er.Al
lcl
ear
."
Wemakeourwayi nsidewit
htheki
dsandIsitdown
assoonasIgeti
nside.Thethi
ngsLangaput
sme
thr
oughkodwa.
"
What
'sgoi
ngonUny
ezi
?",
asksAndr
ew.
"
It
snot
hing.Y'
al
lcanl
eav
ePl
uto.
"
Theyl
eav
ewi
thwar
ryl
ooks.
"
Nkosi
nat
hiandLanga.Mi
ndshar
ingar
oom?
"
Theyshaket
hei
rheads.
"
Huh?
"
"
Chama.
"
"
Okay.Thi
sismydogPl uto.Hesl eepsintheroom at
t
heendofthepassage.Yourr oom isnexttohis.
Minei
sthefir
stone.That
st hekitchenandthisis
t
hechil
li
ngroom.It
sasmal l space."
"
It
sokayma.Weappr
eci
atey
oul
ooki
ngaf
terus.
"
"
Arey
'al
lhungr
y?"
"
Yeboma.
"
Thatsthebathr
oom.Hotwateri
sther
e.Showerand
abath.Gotakeabathandgetcomfor
tabl
einyour
room I
'l
lcooksomet
hing.
"
Theyst
andupandheadt
owar
dst
hepassage.Okay
.
Whatam Igonnacook?Istandtherewit
ht hefri
dge
open.Worsandpap?Letaddabi tofchakalaka.I
havesomeorangejui
ce.Okay.Istar
tcooking.
I
'm halfwaythroughwit
ht hepotswhent heycome
backdr essedinFendit
racksuits.Thesekidsareli
ke
the'
richestkidsinmzansi'act
uallyI
'l
ll
ookt hatl
i
st
up.
"Ihavenet
fl
ix.BoxOff
ice.DSTvExpl
oraal
lchannel
s
paidfor
.Myl apt
ophasr eal
lygoodmovi
es.And
therei
sWiFi her
e."
"Wedon'thav
ephones.Babasay
swey
oung.
",say
s
Langa.
"Good.Thefoodwi l
lbereadysoon.Gr
absome
snacksinthatcupboar
dt her
e.Langai
sthef
ir
stone.
"
NosugarLanga.
"
Hetakesoutpopcor
n.Nkosi
nathi
takeschocol
ate
bi
scuit
sandSimbasaltandvi
negarchi
ps.
"
Ther
e'sj
uicei
nthef
ri
dge.Mi
l
ktoo.
"
Langatakesj
uiceandtheygosi
tdown.Assoonas
thepot
sar er
eadyIdishupandl
eavethefoodt
o
cool.Theywatchi
ngamov i
esoIquicklygot akea
shower.Istandunderthecoldwat erandj ustsoaki t
alli
n.Theyalll
eft
.Nocal lnothi
ng.Ididn'tthi
nkt hi
s
i
showI '
l
lmeetthekids.Theyseem wel lgr oomed
thou.Igetoutbef
oreIst ar
tcryi
ngandwearsome
swagpantsandhoodi e.Theystil
lwatchingamov i
e.
"
Comeeat
."
Theypauset
hemov
ieandst
andup.Wesi
tont
he
count
er.
"
Let
'spr
ay.
",say
sLanga.
Iputdownmyspoonandhol
dthei
rhands.
"
DearGod.Bl
essthi
smealandt
hehandst
hatmade
i
t.Thanky
oufort
hismeal
asother
smaynothav
eit
.
Amen."
Weal lsay'Amen' andstar
teat
ingi nsil
ence.I
'
m
taki
ngt hem onsomeshoppi ngf orsnacksand
may bewi ntercl
othesasit
swinterseason.May be
wecangot oShakaMarineWorld.Plutoiseati
nghis
dogf ood.OhPl uto.Wearewayi ntodeepnow.Ilook
atthiskids.Theydon'tl
ookanythingli
kethe
Khuzway os.Itsnoneofmybusi nesssoIdon'tdwell
ont
het
houghtmuch.
10
UNYEZI
I'
mi nt
heocean.I tsast r
awber ryf
ullmoontoday .
Langawalksov ertomeandhesmi l
esatme.We
bothnakedandIdon' tknowhowbutt heocean
opensupandhel eadsusi nside.Hestandsinfront
ofmeandcov ersmybodywi thhisandt heocean
fal
lsonus.IthinkI'm gonnadr ownwhenIt ake
normalbreat
hes.Hel et'smegoandwhenwet urn
aroundwemetbywomenandmen.Anol dman
walksuptousandhesmear suswi t
hsomet hi
ng
andpushesmeback.
Iwakeupsweat yandcatchingbreaths.Whatwas
that?I'
m usedt onightmaresbutthisonef el
tr eal
.
Ev enthatpush.Itsli
keIwasbei ngpushedt o
consciousness.Iwakeupandi ts05:24andIdon' t
hav ewor k.Il
ightupmyci garet
teandgot hr
oughmy
phone.St il
lnothi
ngfrom Langa.Ijustli
stentomusi c
ti
llit
s06: 33andIgetoutofbed.Ist artonbr eakfast.
Theboy sareupbysev enandI '
m maki ngpancakes
now.Theyl ookcleanandsmel lgood.Theycl ean
freaks.
"
Goodmor
ningma.
",t
heysay
.
Langahugsmeandt akesaseat
.Myey eswel
lupa
l
itt
le.Whenwast helastt
imeIgotahug.Never
mindLangas.Hej ustmademyday.Ievenst
op
wor r
yingaboutt
hatdream.
"
Eatupandaf
terthatwecangot
oShakaMar
ine
Worl
dandPavi
li
on."
"
Ohma.If
orgot
.Her
eisourcar
d."
Nkosi
nat
hihandsmeaNedbankBl
ackCar
d.We
mayneedthi
sfort
heday
.
"Okayzi
thandwa.Letmegobat
h.PleasepourPl
uto
somedogf oodifhewakesupwhi
leI'
m sti
l
l
bathi
ng.
"
"
Okaymama.
",say
sLanga.
Manthiskidwantstomakemecr y.Ismileandhead
f
ormyr oom.Mama?Tome?Igett hatwar mf uzzy
f
eel
ing.Iundressandwal ktotheensuiteandgett he
wat
erreadywhi l
eIsmokeaci gar
ette.Igetinwhen
i
tsr
eady .It
akea30mi nutesbathandwal koutwi t
h
myskinwr i
nkledup.Jeansandki cks.Where'sthat
2pachoodie?Uht herey ouar
e.Ifi
nishdressingup
andIjustspraymyunr ulyafr
oabi t
.Ifindtheboys
doneeatingandwat chingTV.Plutoissit
ti
ngwi th
them andtheybrushinghim absentminded.Itakea
pict
ure.
"
Okayboy
s.Letmeeatandt
hanwe'
l
lgetgoi
ng.
"
"
Okay
."
Idi
shupwhat
'slef
tofbreakf
astandeat
.It
extNana.
Idr
inksomej
uiceandburp.
"
Excuseme.
"
Igetmyhandbagandcheckifev
ery
thi
ngi
sther
e.
Wherear
emycarkey s?Yes.
"
Let
'sgoboy
s."
IopenthedoorandI'm metbymen.Whatt he?Shi
tI
for
gotaboutthem.Nanawal kstowardsus.She
emptiesall
herpocketsandsheisletin.Nkosi
passesPlutot
oher.Langagivesherhisbag.
"
Thanky
ou.I
'
llseey
'al
l
."
Il
ockt
hedoor
.
"
Wher
ear
ey'
al
lheaded?
"
Ei
shSbhamuMann!
"
Wegoi
ngt
otheShakaMar
ineandPav
il
ion.
"
"
Twowi
l
laccompanyy
oui
ntheSUV.
"
"
SoI
'
m notdr
ivi
ng?
"
"
No.
"
Ipasshi m mykey sdef eatedandheadt owardsthe
bigblackSUV.Youcan' tseeshitfrom theout si
de.
It
sjustblack.Theyopent hedoorf orusandweget
i
n.Theki dsar eusedt othisI'
mt heonlyupt i
ghtone.
Thedr iv
eissi l
ent.Theydr i
veint
oShakaandpayf or
parking.Wegetout .Theymai nt
ainadi stancefr
om
us.Ifyoudon' tknowt heywithust hany ouwon't
knowatal l.IhaveLangashandI '
m mi ne.Wehead
forsomecot t
oncandyf i
rst.
"
Ilov
ecot
toncandy
!",
shout
sLanga.
"
Yesbaby
."
Webuyandheadt owardstheaquari
um.Weunder
t
heoceanjustprot
ect
edbygl ass.Wewal
kinand
t
heseacreatur
esmov earoundus.
"
Ashar
k!"
Langat ouchest heglassandheadmi resit
.
Nkosinat hi
isinvestedont heot
hersi de.Jel
lyfish.I
am alsoenj oyi
ngt hi
s.Iloveani
mal s.Wewal kout
aft
erenj oyi
ngour selves.Wegoi ntoeveryplace
beforefinall
ygoingt ogetsomef ood.Wear eata
buffetstoreandt hekidsareenjoy i
ngthefoodand
soam I .Aftereati
ngweheadbackt othepar ki
ngl ot
.
Theyopent hedoor sforus.
"
Pav
il
ion.
"
Theyst ar
tdrivingandLangai sonasugarr ushf r
om
thecandyhi sbeeneat i
ngtoday .Hist el
li
ngmeabout
howki dsathi sschoolwil
lbesoj eal
oust hathehas
aprettymom.Hemakesmepr omi set oatt
endhis
meetingssohecanbr agt othet eachers.Thiski
di s
thesweet est
.Hef all
sasleeponmyl apand
Nkosinathisleepsonmyshoul der.From eThekwini
toePav aisquiteadistance.Iam wokenupbyt he
guardcalli
ngme.
"
Ma'
am.We'
vear
ri
ved.
"
"
Thanky
ou.
"
Ishaket heset woandweal lgetoutst ill
disorientated.Langai shol dingont ome.Wewal k
i
nsi deandIt aket hem t oSpor tscenef irst.Nokidwill
wearFendi andVer sacebef ore18.That '
sawast eof
money .Ipickoutj eansf ort hem.Hoodi es.T-shi
rts.
Wepayandheadt owar dsSt udio88f orki cks.
Nkosi nathipi cksouthi schoi ceandIchoosef or
Langa.Weheadt oMr Price.Ibuyhoodi esand
boxer s.Wehandt hecl othest ot heguar ds.Wehead
toWool wor thsandIgetmysel fsomekni tted
j
er seysandLangat akesonet oo.Ibuyt hem
toilet
riesandski npr oductf orLanga.It hinkthat
s
enough.Py jamas!Ibuyt hem war m pyjamasand
headf orgrocer yshoppi ng.Wepur chaseandor der
somepi zza.I tsabi tlateandsomeshopsar e
closing.Weheadt ot hecarandwear et i
red.
11
UNYEZI
Ifeell
i
keasinglemot herlat
ely.Nkosinathiwentout
withhisf
ri
endsy ester
dayandhecameback
smelli
ngli
keweedandal cohol.Iquesti
onedandhe
answeredmel i
keudi l
i
kaesihlahleni
.Iwhi ppedhi
s
assandhiscleaningthehouseal onetoday .
"
Nat
hi!
"
"
Ma!
"
Hecomesi
nwi
pinghi
shandsandst
andsi
nfr
ontof
me.
"
Ma?
"
"Whenyoudonewashi
ngt
hedi
shesi
ronLangas
cl
othes.
"
Henodsandwal ksoff.Iwon'
tl
ivewithastonerand
al
coholic.Ihaven'
tsmokedweedsi ncet
heyar r
ived
heretobeagoodexampl eandIdon'tsmoke
ci
garett
esi nfr
ontofthem.Langaisbusyonmy
phone.AllIdoiscleanandcooksinceItooksome
ti
meof ffrom work.Imisshavi
ngsomethingtodo
somet i
mes.IgetupandNkosi
nathii
spacki
ngthe
dishes.I
t'
s15h45andIbett
erst
artcooki
ng.Ist
art
takingoutt
heingredi
ent
s.
"
Ma.
"
It
urnar
oundandNkosi
nat
hii
sst
andi
ngt
her
e.
"I
'
m sor r
yaboutyester
day.Idontsmokeandnei ther
doIdr i
nk.Yest
erdaywasami stake.Iknowy ou
missingworktotakecareofusandIshoul d
appreci
atethat
.Sorryfort
hethingsIsaidtoo."
Nowt
hat
swhatIwant
edt
ohear
.
"
Comeher
e."
Helandsi
nmyarmsandweembr
aceeachot
her
.
Thi
schil
dissot
all
.
"
Idon'
tknowany
thi
ngaboutbei
ngamotherbut
meetmehalf
way.I
'
mtryi
ngmybesther
e."
"
Ithi
nky
ou'
redoi
nggoodmom.
"
Igetthatwar
mf uzz
yf eel
ingagain.Inevert
hought
I'
dbeamot her.Wel etgoandIgetbackt ocooki
ng.
It
sbeent woweeksandt heysti
l
lnotbackandt hei
r
phonesgostraighttov oi
cemail
.Imi ssLangasobad
andIneedt
ogetl
aidsoon.
"
Ma.Yourphonei
sri
ngi
ng.
"
"
ThanksLanga.
"
It
aket
hephone.I
tsanunknownnumber
.
"
Hel
l
o"
Theot
herper
sonj
ustbr
eat
hesi
ntot
hephone.
"
Wheny
ou'
redonebr
eat
hinghangy
our
sel
f.
"
IdropthephoneandLangaisgonesoIputi
tonthe
counter
.AsI'
m gett
ingdonewit
hmylastpoti
tri
ngs
again.I
tst
hesameunknownnumber .
"
Donebr
eat
hing?
"
"
Sor
ryaboutt
hat
."
Iam gobsmackedasIr
ecogni
set
hedeepv
oice.
"
Langa?
"
"
Uny
ezi
?"
"
Wherehavey
oubeen?Doy ouknowhowwor r
ied
I
'
vebeen?Act
ual
l
ydon'tanswerthat
.Fucky
ou!"
Idr
opt
hecal
landIf
eel
tear
swel
lup.Dontcr
y!I
missedhim.Imi
ssedhim.Heshould'
vetol
dmehe
wasleavi
ng.Heisbackmaybe.It
akethephoneand
cal
lthenumberagai
n.
"
Hel
l
o."
"
Langa?
"
"
Thi
sisNdabenkhul
u.Letmegi
vehi
mthephone.
"
Therei
sshuf
fl
ingandy
ell
i
ngbef
orehi
svoi
cecomes
thr
ough.
"
Uny
ezi
.Ut
hukami
na?
(you'
reswear
ingatme)
"
Whodoeshethi
nkIwassweari
ng?Iwon'
tapol
ogi
ze
f
ort
hatfut
hiI
'
llsayi
tagai
nifIwantt
o.
"Youl eftwit
houtt el
l
ingme.Doy ouknowhowIwas
worried?Ihadaf uckenbreakdownatwor kthinking
may besomet hi
nghappenedt oyouormay bey ou
j
ustdi dn'tl
ov emeany mor e.Ihadtotakethekidsin
causeMam' Thandi l
ostherhusband!Ihadt obea
mom!Idontknowshi taboutbeingamom Langa!
Doy ouknowhowf r
ustrat
ingitwas?!Youletkids!
Kids!Wearcl otheswor thmyr entever
ymont h!I'
m
sexual l
yfrustratedLanga!Don' tyougeti
t?Ifucken
l
ovey
ou!Act
ual
l
yfucky
ouagai
n!"
Idr
opthecal
landIsi
tdowncr
ying.LangaasNat
hi
wal
kin.
"
Mama.Mom.
"
Iqui
ckl
ywi
pemyt
ear
s.
"Mybabies.Ar
ey '
all
hungr
y?Wecanor
dersome
pizzabef
oredinnerti
mecomes.
"
"
Mom.You'
renotokay
."
Ilookatt hem.Theylooksocute.Nkosi
nathi
looks
reall
yfemi ni
nebutyoucan'tmissthemasculi
nit
y
andLangai sacuti
e.WithLangacomingbackI'l
l
mi ssstayingwit
hthem.Ihaveev engot
tenusedto
theguar dsoutsi
de.
"
Let
'sgosi
t.Gr
absnacks.
"
Wegr
absnacksandIswi
tchof
fthest
ove.
"
Wewat
chi
ngact
ion.
"
"
Chooseamov
ie.
"
Wesi
tdownandNat
higoest
hroughmov
ies.
"
Yourdadcal
l
ed.
"
Theylookatmeandgetbacktowat chi
ngTV.Weal l
chi
llandwatchmov i
esti
l
lweallhungry
.Istandup
andgodishup.Somebodyopenst hedoorabrupt
ly.I
l
ookupandi tsLanga.Hi
sbr
eathingheavi
ly
.
"
Getout
."
"
Uny
ezi
."
"
Getout
.Knock.
"
"
Mkami
."
"
Isai
dgetoutandknock!
"
Heheadsfort
hedoorpi
ssedandknocks.Iheadf
or
t
hedoorandopenit
.
"
Hel
l
o."
"
Uny
ezi
.CanIcomei
n?"
Imakespacef orhim andthewholeKhumaloclan
walksin.Myapar t
mentisnotthatbi
gastheysiton
couchesandot hersf
indspace.Theboysarehappy
toseetheiruncl
es.Langaisstandi
nginfr
ontofme.
"
Canwet
alk?
"
Inodandweheadformybedroom.Hest
artspaci
ng
asheenter
sandIcl
osethedoor.I
'
m wai
ti
ngforhi
m
tost
oppacing.
"Youaremakingmedi
zzy.You'
l
lpaceahol
eint
omy
carpet
.Hestopsandl
ooksatme.
"
IthoughtIwasgonnal
osey
ou.It
houghtI
-I
-"
Hegrabsmeandki ssesme.Imi ssedt hi
s.Imiss
him.Ikisshim backasIpul l
him closer.Ithoughtwe
weregonnat al
kbutt hisistalki
ngenough.Hel ift
s
meupandput smeont hebed.I'm alloverhim and
thewayhi shumpi ngonmewi t
hhi sbulgei sdri
vi
ng
mecr azy!Amoanescapesmymout handhegr oans.
Thatsoundagai n.Hisgr oansaresoent i
cing.
"
Langa.
",Imoanout
.
Heki ssesmyjawli
neandt r
ail
sdowntomyneck.
Hel i
cksandblowsairear
ningamoanfrom me.I
rememberhisf ami
l
yisintheli
vingr
oom andIdi
dn'
t
closethepot
s.
"
Khuzway
ost
op.
"
Hest
opski
ssi
ngmeandr
oll
sov
ert
othebedand
covershi
sface.Webothbreat
hingheavi
lyandl
ooks
atme.Imissedtheocean.Theoceanseemscalm
todayandthemoonlooksbeauti
ful
.Myownl i
tt
le
haven.
"
Uthef
ucky
ouki
mi.
(yousai
dfucky
out
ome.
)"
Oht
hat
.
"
Yousai
ditt
wice.Your
aisedy
ourv
oiceatme
Uny
ezi
."
Isi
tupandlookathim.Hehashishandsbehindhis
headandthelookhi
sgivi
ngshouldbemakingme
wetmypantsbuttheonlywetthi
ngismypanties
causedoeshelooksexyangr
y.
"I
'
m notgonnaapol
ogizefort
hat
.Youdeser
vedi
t.
Sorr
yforr
aisi
ngmyv oiceaty
outhou.
"
"
Doy
oul
oveme?
"
Hesitsupmakesmesi
tontopofhi
m.Il
ookathim.
DoIlovehi
m?Yes.I
'
vefal
l
ensohardIswearhi
sall
I
thi
nkabout
.
"
Ido.Idol
ovey
ou.
"
Whenhel
eftwi
thoutsay
inggoodby
eIt
houghtIl
ost
hi
m.Ikeptoncr eat
ingscenari
osinmyheadofwhat
mayhav ehappenedt ohi
m andIbrokedown.The
onethatscar
edmet hemostishi
m dead.Ifeel
his
fi
ngersrubbi
ngmycheeks.
"I
'
m sor
ry.Stopcr
ying.IknowIwaswrongbutI
di
dn'
tknowhowI '
dt el
lyouwhereIwasgoingwi
th
whatawait
edmeathome.Iwasscar ed."
"
Wher
ewer
eyou?
"
"
Iwenthome.EChamt
u.Ineededanswer
s."
Hekissesmeandwegot otheothers.Idi
shupand
i
tsnotenoughsoImakenoodlesforme.Theytake
t
heirplat
esandIhandLangahi
s.
"
Whyar
eyoueat
ingnoodl
es?
"
"
Thef
oodwasn'
tenoughf
oral
lofus.
"
"
Comeeatwi
thme.
"
Langathou.Hemakesmesi
tont
opofhi
m and
feedsme.
"
I'
mful
lnow.
"
"
Eat
.You'
vel
ostwei
ght
."
Hekeepsonfeedi
ngmet i
llIf
eell
ikeI'
l
l burst.He
st
opsfinal
l
yandItr
ygetti
ngoffhi
m butheshakes
hi
shead.Heeatswhil
etal
kingtohisbrothers.
"You'
resl
eepi
ngov
err
ight
?",
Iwhi
spert
ohi
m andhe
nods.
Hethi
nkshegotawayeasy.Iwanthi
mt ot
ell
me
whythefuckhelef
twi
thoutev
entext
ingme.PlusI
needtogetlai
d.
12
UNYEZI
Langal
amiisshar
inghowIwhippedNathi
sassand
madehim dothecleani
ngandtheyl
aughi
ng.
"
Baba.Ebenzaso(
hewasdoi
ngt
his)
"
HethanmimicsNathiwhil
escreami
ng"mamay oh!
Sor
ryma!Ngekengiphinde!Mamayhii
i
!"andt
hese
bi
gheadsarelaughi
ng.
"
Yekani
umt
anami
.Woza.
"
Nat
hist
ickshi
stongueoutandcomest
ome.
"
You'
l
ltur
ntheseki
dst
opussi
es.
",
say
sLanga
"SoNkosi
nat
hiawusho.Bakushay
eleni
?",
asks
Khul
ekani
.
Hel
ooksatme.I
'
m notgonnal
i
efory
ou.
"I
-Icamebackhomelat
e.Dr
unkandhi
ghandIwas
di
sr espect
ful
toma.
"
"Di
dyousayhi
gh?Ubhemai nt
sanguwena?(y
ou
smokeweed?)
",Langaaskshi
m andNathi
doesnt
answer
.
"
Disrespect
ful
?Di
srespect
ful
Nkosi
nat
hi?Woza
l
a!(
comeher e)
"
Heatt
emptst
ogr
abhi
m butIj
umpi
nfr
ont
.Theyal
l
st
andup.
"Khuzwayo.Mxolel
e.Sengi
mshay
il
e(f
orgi
vehi
m.I
'
ve
hithi
m.)"
,Itr
yreasonj
ng.
"MaGemahl
ehl
a.Nkosi
nat
hiwozal
a.(
mov
e.come
her
e.)
"
Ndabenkhul
utr
iessnat
chi
nghi
m andIpul
lhi
m away
f
rom him.
"
Sengimshayil
ekodwaboKhuzwayo.Uxol
i
sil
e
f
uthi
.(
I'
vehithi
m.Heapologi
zed.
)"
"
Baba.Ungamshay
i.
(don'
thi
thi
m)"
,Langal
ami
tri
es
r
easoni
ngtoo.
"
Phumani
.(
leav
e)"
Theyall
sendl
ookst
owar
dsNkosi
nat
hiandhehol
ds
metight
er.
"
Got
oyourr
oom.Don'
tfor
gett
obr
ushy
ourt
eet
h."
Theygot
othei
rroom wi
thLangaapol
ogi
singf
or
tel
li
ngt hem abouttheinci
dent.Igoopenthedoor
andt heygetti
nginsidetheSUV.Theguardsaresti
ll
here.Langaclosest hedoorandcomest owar
dsme.
Hel i
ghtshiscigaret
teandIclosethedoorandstand
nexttohi m.
"
I'
m sor
ryf
orNkosi
sbehav
ior
.We'
l
ltal
ktohi
m."
"
It
sokay
.Puber
tyhi
tshar
d.Justdon'
thi
thi
m."
Hehandsmethecigaret
teandpull
smet ost
andi
n
f
rontofhi
m.Theguardsarelooki
ngatus.
"
You'
dmakeagoodmom.
"
"
No.Iam agoodmom.
"
Helooksatmeandsmil
es.Thosedi
mplesagai
n.I
bl
owsmokeonhi sf
aceandhecoughs.
"
Hay
imanUny
ezi
!"
Ilaughathi m asIputt heci
garet
teoutandwewal k
backi nsi
de.Icleanar oundandputthedi shesinthe
dishwasher .Icheckont heki
dsandt heysl eepi
ng.I
refi
llPlut
o'swat erandclosehi
swi ndow.Hi sbeen
playi
ngwi ththeki dsandtheylov
ehi m.Iwal kinmy
room andi tsempt y.Theshowerisrunning.Istri
p
nakedandIst andbyt hedooradmiri
nghi m.Hisgot
verynicelegsandt heylookgreatwiththose
brackets.Hisgotv erymusculart
highsandt heyhav e
thosev '
s.Inev ernot i
cedwhatacut ebutthehas.
Hisbackmuscl esflexashemov eshisshoul ders.
Howdi dIgett hi smant obemi ne?Hisper f
ect.His
gotthisbeaut i
ful goldenbrownskinthatlooks
beautif
ul asthewat erstr
eamsdownhi sbody .
"
Icanf
eel
yourey
es.
"
Hetur
nsar
oundandhesmi
l
es.Hi
ssmi
l
eli
ter
all
y
makesmeweak.
"
Joi
nme.
"
Iwal
ki ntheshowerandt hewateri
scoldcausi
ng
metoshr iek.It
urnthewatert
emperat
ure.Asitget
s
warm Ifeelhim behi
ndme.
"Soy
oureadytotel
lmewhatyouhadtodoback
home?"
,Iaskwit
houtt
urni
ngaround.
If
eel
him washmyback.
"Wehave..
.It
sacurse.
..Noact
ual
l
yit
sabl
essi
ng.
Youprobabl
ywon'tbel
ieveme.
"
"
No.Tr
yme.
"
Het
urnsmear
oundandst
art
swashi
ngmychest
.
"I
tsaKhuzway othi
ng.Weonlyshallimpregnat
eor
getpregnantbyasoul chosenforusbyt he
ancestors.I
tssortofl
ikeasoumat e.Those
soulmateswi l
lseeacertai
nsceneryinoureyes.The
moonandt heocean."
"Thatmeansyou'
vef
oundyoursoulmat
eandi
ts
notme.It
stheboysmother
."
Hehol
dmeasIt
rypul
l
ingaway
.
"Theboysar enotmybi ologicalsons.Thei rmother
overheadaconv er
sati
onshewasn' tsupposet ohear
andusedi tasanadv antage.Shehadusf ooled.
Mademebel i
ev e..
.mademebel i
evet heboy swer e
mine.Shel eftassoonassher eal
isedwehadf ound
outthetruth.Buty ou.You'rearemyt ruechosenone.
Evenifyouwer en'tIwouldstil
lchoosey ou."
"I
'
m anathi
estandnei
theram It
radi
ti
onal
.Ift
hat
'
s
howiti
sthanokay.
"
"
Didy
ouhav
eanywei
rddr
eam ofme?
"
"No.Actuall
yyes.Wewer
eintheocean.Icould
breatheunderwater
.Wei
rdri
ght?Ther
ewer epeopl
e
there.Thi
soldmensmeareduswithsomethingand
hepushedme.Iwokeupaf t
erthat.
"
Hesmi lesandki ssesme.Hepr essesmeagainst
thewall andheuseshi skneetopartmylegs.His
handgoest omyv agi
naandhepar t
smyf ol
dsand
rubsmycl i
t.Heinsert
sonef i
ngerandheinsert
s
anotherandIf l
inchabi t
.Ihaven'
thadsomei na
whil
e.
"
Sti
l
lint
act
."
Andhegoesbackt okissingmeashepumpshi s
fi
ngersinandoutwhi lehisthumbr ubsmycl it.Ifeel
abui l
dcomi ng.Igri
phi sshouldersasIcum.Hel i
fts
myl egupandput sitaroundhiswai st
.Hei nserts
himselfandIsqui r
m al i
ttl
e.ManIf orgothowbi ghe
i
s.Af t
eraf ewsecondshest artsmov i
ng.Ihav eto
admi t
.Iwashav ingahar dtimewi thmycr avingsbut
thekidskeptmebusy .Hest art
sof fsl
owly.Hi s
kissi
ngmyneckandr unninghishandupanddown
myt higharoundhiswai st.Hisotherhandispl aying
withmyni pple.
"
Ilov
eyouMaGema.
"
Il
ookathi
m andt
hemoonandoceanar
ether
e.
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Hegoesi ndeeperandIar
chmybackashehi tsmy
g-spot
.Hekeepshitti
ngmyg-spotandIcum.My
l
egsareshakingasIbegintosl
idedownthewallbut
Langapicksmeup.Het ur
nsoffthewaterandwalks
tomybed.Hel aysmedownsof tl
y.
"
CanIgetabi
trough?I
'
m al
i
ttl
eagi
tat
ed.
"
Di
dhej
ustaskf
ormyper
missi
on?Inodmyhead.
"
Usey
ourwor
ds.
"
"
Yes.
"
Hestandsupandtakesouthisst
ri
ngf
rom hi
s
swagpantandcomesbacktome.ManIlovebei
ng
ti
ed.Heti
esmyhandst oget
her.
"
Keept
hem t
her
e."
Hegoesoutandcomesbackwit
hi cecubes.Heput
s
oneinhi
smouth.Hecomestowardsmeandhe
ki
ssesmeandhestart
str
aci
ngkissesf r
om my
j
awl i
nedownwar ds.Thecol dnessofhisli
psis
sendingmeov ertheedge.Hepl ayswit
htheiceon
myni pplesandhet racesthem downt i
l
lmybel l
y
button.Heleavesi tthereandturnsmear ound.Ifeel
him enterfr
om behi ndandhegoesdeep.Shi t
!He
startsgoingreal
lyf astandhei sgoingdeeper.I
'
m
tryi
ngt okeepitdownf orthesakeofmyki ds.Iuse
thepi l
l
owt osubsidemymoans.Hespanksmybut t
andhol dsmyhi psashest art
sdr i
l
lingi
nme.He
pull
sonmyhai randi tal
lowshim deeppenetrat
ion.
"
Langa!I
'
m gonnacum!
"
"
Cum f
orme.
"
Iletitallout
.Het ur
nsmear oundputsbothl
egson
hisshoul der
s.Heent er
ssl
owlyandy ouknowthat
deep" mmh"soundwhenheput sital
li
n.We
mai ntaineyecontactashethrust
sinme.Hishit
ting
allther i
ghtspotsandIwon'
tlast.Hestar
tsmoving
fasterandIst i
ll
hav emyhandst i
edandIwannado
somet hi
ngwithmyhands.
"
Pleaseunt
ieme.
"
"
No.
",andheupshi
space.
Ineedt
ograbsomethi
ng.Iam bi
ti
ngmyl
i
pssoI
don'
twakeuptheki
ds.
"
Langa.Mmmmh.
"
"
Youl
i
ket
hat
?"
"
Yes.Yes.
"
Hekeepsonhi t
ti
ngmyg-spotov
erandoveragai
n
andifIknewtheKhuzway
oclansI'
dbepr
aisi
nghim
ri
ghtnow.Icum real
l
yhar
d.
"
CanIt
akear
ide?
"
Helooksatmeandunt iesmesl owly.Hel aysdown
andIgetont opofhi m.Hehel psmei nserthim and
hefeelsbi ggerinthispositi
on.WhenI '
m
comf ortablewithhissideIst artmov ingbackand
fort
handmov i
ngmywai st
.HeatbyChr i
sBr own
playsinmyheadandI 'm mov ingwi ththebeat .Up
down.Si deway s.Fronttoback.WhenI '
mr eall
y
feel
ingitLangast ealsmyshi neandhol dmyhi ps
humpi ngf rom underneathme.Can' thebe
submi ssiveforaf ewmi nutes?Ican' tsayI'm not
l
ov i
ngt hewayhi smov i
nghi swai stthou.Ther eis
somet hingabouthi sstrokes.I'mt r
yingtokeepup
withhi m buthi sli
keaf astmi xt
ape.I'm holdi
ngont o
hist highswi thmybackar chedandmyt i
tt
ieskeep
onbumpi ng.Hegr absoneandpi nchesmyni ppl
e
andt hatistheendofmecausi ngmet ocum.He
turnsusar oundandmakesmehol dmyt highstomy
chest .Hei nsertshimselfandmov eshiswai stin
cir
cul armot ion.Hestartswi t
hhisf astpaceagai n
andt hispositi
onisgivi
ngmeal otofsexual
adv ant age.OurgroinsarerubbingandIam
scrat chinghisback.Hei skissingmyneck.Hi s
thrust saredeepandhi sst rokesreallyfast.I
'm
gonnacum.
"
Langa.
"
Hel
et'soutagrowl
andIsquir
t.Aft
erwegetdown
f
rom ourcl
imaxhetakeshi
mselfout.Heki
ssesme.
"Ilov
ey ou.
",
andheroll
sover
.Hetakesouta
cigaret
teandli
ghtsi
t.Myheadi
sonhi schest
.It
ake
thecigaret
teandsmoke.
"
CanIt
akey
ouondat
etomor
row?Wi
tht
heki
ds?
"
"
Yes.I
'
dli
ket
hat
."
"
Thanky
ouf
orbei
ngt
her
efort
hem whi
l
eIwasnt
ar
ound.
"
"
Khuzway
o.Howr
ichar
eyou?
"
"
LikeOwnjetsandheli
copter
ski
ndofr
ich.Don'
task
mybankbalance.Iweart
hatonmywri
st."
Hetakesouthi
swat
chandIhavenoi
deawhati
tis
butt
hosearedi
amondsIswear
.
"
Otherwi
seBi
l
lGat
es.Keepy
ourr
ichl
i
feawayf
rom
me."
"
Independentmami
.
"
Hespanksmybut tandkissesme.Iputoutthe
cigar
etteandwelayineachothersarms.Wemovi
ng
fastIknowbutl
ov emakesonel osebal
ance.
Irecei
vedacallfr
om areaderandshesentmedata.
Pleaseletyour
sel
fknownunderthi
spost.You'
re
appreci
ated.

13
UNYEZI
Iwokeupt oanempt ybed.Hi ssidewasst i
l
lwar m
soIknewhej ustgotout.Isatupandt heburning
betweenmyl egsandt hest i
ffnessremindedmeof
yesterday
'sactiv
ity
.Istoodupgent l
yandwentt othe
bathroom.Ifil
ledthetubwhi l
ebr ushi
ngmyt eeth.
Mybodyhadl ovebitesalloverandIsmi l
edalittl
e.
AssoonasIsoakedmy selfasi ghescapedmy
mout h.
"
Mkami
!"
"
Bat
hroom!
"
Heleansont hedoor f
rameandf ol
dhisarms.Does
hehavetolookt hi
sent i
cing?Welookateachot her
.
Nowor dssaid.Meswi mmi nginhi
soceaney es.I
am notatradit
ionalpersonbutwhathesaid
yest
erdayaboutt
hechosenoneandit
sbeenonmy
mind.Maybeitst
hetr
uth.That
sahugeMAYBE.
"
Ilov
eyouKhuzway
o."
"
Ilov
eyou.Ador
eyou.Appr
eci
atey
ou.MaGema.
"
"
Aret
heki
dsawake?
"
"
I'
ll
bedone.I
'
m sur
etheyhungr
y."
Ist
andupf
rom t
het
ub.
"
Wai
t.Ior
der
edpi
zza.
"
Il
ookathim.May
behi
sjoki
ng.Il
aughandhi
s
ser
ious.
"
What
?Pi
zza?ForBr
eakf
ast
?Ki
l
lme!
"
Heshrugsandwal ksaway .Whointheworldgiv
es
ki
dspizzaforbreakfast
?Iwalkoutthetub.Thepai
n
hassubsidedandIcant ol
eratei
t.Ihav
ethat"Ij
ust
gotbanged"glow.Idressupandgot othekit
chen.
Thekidsquickl
yclosethepizzabox.
"
ItwasDad'
sidea.
",Langav
oicesout
.
"Makesomenoodl
eswhi
l
eIf
ixy
'al
lsomet
hing.Di
d
Plut
oeat?
"
"
Ifedhi
m ma.
"
Iwal
kupt
othem andki
sst
hei
rfor
eheads.
"
Goodmor
ningki
ds.
"
"
Goodmor
ningmom.
"
"
Wher
eisy
ourf
ather
?"
"Het ookPl utof orawal k.Hisneverwalkedadog
before.Wet oldhi m Nanadoesi tandhesaidandI
quote" ngekengi hl
ulwei nt
oencaneaswal ki
nga
dog(Iwon' tbedef eatedbysomet hingassmall
)"so
wel ethim be.",Langaf i
llsmein.
"
Yourf
atheri
sgonnagi
vemewhi
tehai
r.
"
Wel aughandIgetbr eakfastready.Imisswor k
honestly
.Ihav etotalktoLangaaboutt hekids
vi
siti
ngmeonweekendscauseIl ovehavingthem
aroundbutI '
m notBillGatesdaught ersoIgotwor k.
Iam dishingupwhenLangawal ksin.Hisheaving
andsweat y.Didhegof orar unorwhat ?Hepour s
hi
msel fsomewat erandgul psit.Pl
utofoll
owsaf t
er
hi
m andheadsf orhiswat erbowl .
"
Andt
hen?
"
"It
ookPlut
oforawal
kandendedupr
unnni
ngaf
ter
him.Nev
eragain!
"
Il
aughathim asheheadsf
orthebedr
oom.Pl
utoi
s
notevenonaleash.Hi
snevert
aki
ngPlut
oonawalk
everagai
n.
"
Breakf
ast
!"
Theboy
scomer
unni
ngandt
aket
hei
rseat
s.
"
Guesst
hewal
kdi
dn'
tgowel
l
.",
Nat
hisay
s.
"
Heendeduprunni
ngaf t
erPlut
o.Whot
akesadog
f
orawalkwi
thoutaleash?"
"
Stopdi
scussi
ngme.
",hecut
sin.
"Butshamemyeni
wami.St
ickt
owear
ingBr
ent
wood
andleavet
hedogwal
ki
ngtoNana.
"
Hecli
ckshi stongueandsulksandwedeadwi t
h
l
aughter.Thisissobeauti
ful.I
twasmeandPl uto
butnowIhav et hi
ssmallli
tt
lefamil
y.Famil
y?Letme
notgetaheadofmy sel
f.Wehav ebreakf
astmaking
funofthedogwal ker.
LANGALAKHELI
HLE
Ithi
nkI'
lladmiredogsandkeepi tl
iket hat.I
'm not
walki
nganydogi nt hi
sli
fet
imeagai n.Iputt hepizza
i
nt hefr
idge.Guesswewon' tbeeatingt hat.The
boysareoutont hecouch.Stay
ingathomebor es
them.Acal l
from Seni
orKhuzway ocomest hr
ough
andIanswer .
"
Baba.
"
"
Ndodana.
"
"
Unj
ani
?(howar
eyou)
"
"
I'
m okay
.Whenam Imeet
ingmydaught
er?
"
"
AhBaba.Wai
tunt
ilaf
ewmont
hspassby
."
"
Sheworksatoneofmyl
awf
ir
msson.I
'
lli
ntr
oduce
mysel
f.
"
"
Babay
oucan'
t-
"
Hedropst hecal
l.Thi
sol
dtimeri
sgiv
ingmea
headache.Atextcomesthr
oughfr
om Thando.
"
CanIhav
etheboy
ssl
eepov
er?Imi
sst
hem.
"
Heeh!Igett
ext
snow?No'
heybi
gbr
other
'?Abo
Thandobay akhulayazi
.Unyeziisstandingbythe
windowinherr oom smoking.She'sjustinmyt -
shi
rt
andherthicklegsandthighslookcr eamy.Lordher
booty!AndthewayshebendwhenI 'm hit
ti
ngitfr
om
theback!I
tslikeGodholdsmyhandandi sli
ke
"Don'
tcrymyson. "every
time.Iwalkupt oher.
"
Babe.
"
"
Mmmh.
"
"
Ngenzeni
?(whatdi
dIdo)
"
"
Not
hing.I
'
mjustt
hinki
ng.
"
"
About
?"
"
Ineedtogetbackt
owor
k.Cant
heki
dsv
isi
tont
he
weekends?
"
"We'l
ltal
kaboutt
hat
.Mysi
sterwant
stoseet
he
boys.
"
"Whydoesitseem l
i
key
ou'
reaski
ngf
ormy
consent
?"
"
CauseIam.
"
"
Whyi
sthat
?"
"
You'
ret
hei
rmot
her
."
Sheturnsaroundandputsoutt
hecigaret
te.She
needstostopsmokingbutIwon'tv
oicethatout
.
She'
llchewmyheadof f
.
"
That
's.
..Wow.Uh.
..Thanky
ou?
"
"
Uny
ezi
.Thanky
ouy
ani
?"
"
Thanky
ouf
ort
rust
ingmewi
thy
ourki
ds.
"
"
Sthandwasami
.It
rusty
ouwi
thmyl
i
fe.
"
Shet hr
owsherhandsar oundme.Herhugsar eso
warm.Shei sli
keat eddybear.Arealhumant eddy
bear.Thefuck?!Whatam Iev ensayi
ng?Iinhaleher
scent.Shesmellsofme.That '
sthemostper f
ect
scentshecanev erwear.Ikissherhead.West ay
l
ikethatti
llshebreaksitup.
"Shecanf
etcht
hem.Wheni
sshebr
ingi
ngt
hem
back?"
"
Tomor
rowmay
be?
"
"
Okay
.I'
l
lpackt
hei
rcl
othes.
",shesay
syawni
ng.
Shemustst
il
lbet
ir
edf
rom l
astni
ght
.Wesl
eptl
ate
wi
thal
lthatheatwehadupi
nher
eyest
erday
.
"
Cat
chsomez'
s.I
'
llpack.
"
"
You'
resur
e?"
"
YesIam Mami
."
Shesmi l
esandki ssesme.Herki ssesar eso
addict i
ve.Theyal way sleavemewi thawhol ezoo
i
nsidemyst omach.Shepul lsaway .Ilookatherand
shel ooksback.Wehav i
ngoneoft hosei ntenseey e
cont actmoment .Shehasbeaut iful br
owney esand
theyl ookbeaut i
ful.She'sbeautiful.Ileadhert obed
andt uckheri n.Shey awnsandhangsherhandov er
thebed.Iwal koutt ogopackt hisboy sclot hes.I
textThandot helocat i
on.Theboy sr oom l ooksr eall
y
clean.Sur prising.WhenIopenI '
m sur pr i
sedt hey
boughtsomuchcl othesf r
om home.Ist artpacki ng
andIr eali
sehal fthesecl othesarenew.Mr Pr ice?
Khuzway oboy s?Mr Pri
ce?Ilookatal lthet agsand
mostoft hehoodi esar efrom Mr Price.Si ncewhen?
ThishasUny ezi al
l overit
.Mysi sterwi lldef initel
y
getal ongwi thher .Shet hinkspur chasi ngexpensi ve
clothesonl inef orkidsisawast e.Itsamant hi ngI
don'
texpectwoment ogetit
.Ipackt
heirnew
normalcl
othes.NkosicomesinasIpackhisGucci
hoodi
ein.
"No.Putitback.Mom saidthosecl
othesaref or
special
occasions.That
swhyt heyontheot hersi
de
ofthecloset.Youwanthertokil
lme?Shel ooks
real
lysoftbuttrustmeherbeati
ngsaint
."
Hetakesi
tandf
oldsi
tni
cel
yandput
sitaway
.Is
t
hismyson?
"
Youcanf
oldnow?Wonder
sofUny
ezi
!"
"
Guessal
lweneededwasher
."
"
Sitdownwi
thmeson.
"
Wesi
tont
hei
rbed.
"
Arewel
eav
ingal
ready
?"
"
Noty
et.You'
regoi
ngt
oAunt
iThandospl
ace.
"
"
Ohokay
.I'
vemi
ssedher
.Ican'
tev
encal
lher
."
"
Sli
ck.Youget
ti
ngaphoneony
ourbi
rt
hday
."
"
I'
ll
wai
t.
"
"
Doy
ousmoke?
"
Heshi
ft
sawayf
rom meabi
t.
"
Nodad.I
twasaonet
imet
hing.
"
"Lalel
ala.Ify out hinksmoki ngmakesy oucool t
han
you'rewr ong.I fyouf eel y
ouhav etosmoket ofi
tin
thant hosef r
iendsar en' treal.Youneedt oknowy our
purposeki d.You' r
easmar tboy.Don'truinthatby
beingaj unky .Ismokey esbutIwor khardf ormy
money .Iwasbor nrichbutIknowwhati t
sl i
kegoing
tobedhungr y.Wehadt oughl ove.Wegr atefulf
orit
too.Yourmkhul umaynotbet hewor l
d'sgreatest
dadbutt rustmewhenIsaywi t
houthisteachings
andpuni shment sI 'dpr obabl ywouldhav ediedat18
ondr ugov erdoseatanexpensi veapartmentcauseI
wasaspoi ltbrat."
"
Igety
oudad.
"
"
Ilov
eyouson.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oodad.
"
"
Whataboutme?
"
WemetbyLangast
andi
ngbyt
hedoor
.
"
Wel
ovey
out
oo.
"
Hecomestowardsusandpul
l
susi nf
orahug.Wai
t
t
il
lImarr
yUnyezi.We'
l
lbet
ogether
.Happy
.
Hopef
ull
y.
14
UNYEZI
It
sbeenaf ewweekssinceI'vebeenbackt owor k.
Theboy sdocomet ov i
siteveryweekend.MrMay a
i
sgoi ngthroughadiv
orcesoI '
m deal
ingwitha
grumpyol dman.Hehascour ttodayandIam
dreadingwalkingi
nsi
dehi soffi
ce.Istandupand
standatthedoorforafewmi nutesbeforeknocking.
"
Ngena!
(comei
n)"
Iwal
kinandhest
il
lkeepshi
sneatper
sona.
"
Youhav
ecour
tinanhoursi
r.
"
"
Okay
.Youcanl
eav
e."
Istandthereforawhi
le.Di
dhejust
?NoIdoubthe
did.Ichuckl
eandhelooksupatme.
"
Humormet
ooUny
ezi
."
"
Nodi
srespect
.Asi
mpl
ethanky
ouwon'
tki
l
lyou.
"
HelooksatmeandIstar
eback.Idon'
tcarei
fheis
mysuperi
orri
ghtnowbutIdeser
veami nor'
thank
you'
.
"
Thanky
ouUny
ezi
."
"
Mypl
easur
esi
r.
"
Iwalkoutandt akeadeepbr eatheasIexithisoff
ice.
I'
vebeenlosingmycool alotlatel
y.I
'm suremy
peri
odsar eontheway .Ineedasmoke.Ihead
outsideandwhenIl i
ghttheci garet
teIjustendup
putti
ngitout.Idon'
tfeelli
kei tnomore.Ilighti
tup
again.It
akeaf ewpuf f
sbef oregoingbacki nsi
de.
"
Uny
ezi
."
Il
ookatthefemalei
nfor
mal cl
othi
ng.Shewor
ks
her
e.It
hinkhernameisThembi.
"
Thembi
."
"
Mynamei
sThandi
."
"
Ohsor
ry.HowmayIhel
p?"
"
It
sokay
.Youdon'
ttal
ktousei
therwaysoIgeti
tif
y
oudon'
tknowmyname."
I
fshe'
stryi
ngt
omakemef
eel
badt
hani
tsnot
wor
king.
"
Thandogett
alki
ngpl
ease.
"
"
Thandi
."
"
For
giv
eme.Ihav
eat
hingwi
thnames.
"
"Anywaywehost
ingapar
tyf
oruscol
l
eagues.Fr
iday
night
.Woul
dyouliket
ocome?"
"
I'
ll
bet
her
e."
Ismil
eandwalkaway .I
'
m notgoi
ngther
e.I
'
m not
l
ookingforf
ri
ends.Iwal
ktomystati
onandstar
t
working.

Iam di
sturbedbypeopl eleaving.Itsknockoffti
me
al
ready?Ifini
shupwhent hatpainonmysi dehits
meagain.Ist opwhatI'm doi
ngandsi tsti
ll
.I'
vebeen
havi
ngitforaf ewweeksnowandI '
m star
tingtoget
worri
ed.Istandupandpackup.Iwal kt omycar
wit
hmypr essedt omyside.Igeti nsi
demycarandI
l
etthetearsfall.Thi
sisreall
yirri
tati
ngandpai nful.I
dri
vetotheGar ageandbuywat er.Idrinkpainki
llers
wit
hsomewat eranddri
vehome.AssoonasIar rive
atmyapar tmentmyphoner ings.ItsLanga.
"
Khuzway
o."
"
MaGema.
"
"
Howar
eyou?
"
"
I'
m okayj
ustmi
ssi
ngy
ou.Andy
ou?
"
"
I'
m okay
."
Iwanttot
ell
him Ihav
en'
tbeenokayl
atel
ybutIdon'
t
wanttoworr
yhim.
"
LangasaysImustasky
oui
fyoucanat
tendhi
s
meeti
ngatschool
."
"
Wheni
sit
?"
"
Fri
dayaf
terschool
.
"
Gr
eatexcuset
omi
sst
hatpar
tyatwor
k.
"
Okayst
handwasami
.Howi
sNat
hi?
"
"Hisokay
.YouknowIl
i
kei
twheny
oucal
lme
sthandwasami
."
Il
ayonmybedpr
essi
ngmysi
de.
"
Ngempel
ast
handwasami
?(f
orr
eal
myl
ove)
"
"
Ngempel
amkami
."
"
Ilov
eyouKhuzway
o."
"
Ilov
eyout
ooMaGema.
"
"
Ishof
uthi
(sayi
tagai
n)"
"
Ngy
ak'
thandaMaGema.
"
"
Letmesl
eepabi
t.
"
"
You'
reokay
?"
"
Justaheadache.
"
"
I'
ll
checkony
oul
ater
."
"
Okay
."
"
Bye.
"
"
Bye.
"
Wedropt
hecall
andIcl
osemyeyeswithmyhand
st
il
lonmysi
de.Thi
spai
nbet
terendsoon.

(
Iknowi
t'
sshor
tbutsomet
hingbef
orey
'al
lsl
eep.
)
15
UNYEZI
Theboy sarecomingov
erfort
heweekend.Iam
cleani
ngaroundwhenIcutmyfinger.Assoonas
thebloodstar
tsoozi
ngIhaveaflashback.
"Pl
easel
etmego.Iwon'
ttel
lany
one.Justl
etme
go.
",
myvoicecomesouthoar
se.
Ichokeonmysobashegr
oansandspi
l
lshi
ssper
m
onmyf ace.
"
Yousl
ut!
"
Thebossyonecomest owardsme.Het akesouta
kni
feandkneelsinfrontofme.Iam scaredandmy
bodyhurts.Somebodyhelpme.Whyme?Youkeep
onfail
ingmeGod.Youdi ditagai
n.Youpr omi
sed
andletmedownagai n.
"Wi
tht
hismar
k.Youbelongt
ome.Anymany
ou
sl
eepwit
hwil
lseet
his.
"
Heholdsmyt hi
ghanddrawsanXonmyi nnert
high.
Thebloodoozes.Cri
msonredbloodstai
ningwhi
te
ti
l
es.Ifeel
my sel
fsuccumbtodarkness.
"
Uny
ezi
?"
Il
ookupandi
tsLangaandt
heboy
s.Hesendst
he
boysaway
.
"
Arey
ouokay
?"
Ilookathi
m.Howdoessuchaper fectspecimenfal
l
forsuchabrokensoul?Hehel psmeupandcl eans
thebloodoffmyf i
nger.Ist
andtherewat chi
nghim
cleanupmybl ood.Anotherfl
ashbackflowsin.
Ikneeltherescrubbi
ngthewhi tet
il
esofmyr oom i
n
theorphanage."MakeitquickUnyezi.Bef
orethey
see.
"Iscr ubti
ll
theshinecomesback.HowIwi shI
canscrubmysoul ti
l
lit
sascl eanasthatfl
oor.
"
Youokay
?Uny
ezi
?"
Ijustlookathi m.I
'
m sureheknows.I '
m surehegets
disgustedwhenhel ooksatme.Iseehi m
approachi ngme.Don'ttouchme!Iletoutablood
curli
ngscr eam andhest andsback.Fi
ghtitUnyezi
!
Fightit!Isitdownwithmychi nonmyknees.Fi ghti
t!
Fightit!Ifeelhi
mtouchmybackandi tarousesme.I
turntol ookathim.Ipullhiminforaki
ss.He
hesitatesbef or
eki
ssingmeback.Hepul lsawayand
Ipull
him backi
n.Ineedyouri
ghtnow.That
sthe
onlywayIcanforget.Hest
andsupwit
hmei nhi
s
arms.Heleadsust omyroom andput
smedownon
thebed.
"
Yousur
e?Youdon'
tseem okay
."
"
I'
m sur
e.Nof
orepl
ay.Ber
ough.
"
Hel ooksatmeandhest ar
tstaki
ngoffhi
sclothes.I
takeoutmi nebef
orepul
li
nghimi nf
orakiss.He
kissesmebackhungril
y.Hishandsareal
loverme
andIj ustwanthi
minsi
deme.
"
Khuzway
o."
Henodsatmeandposi t i
onshi mselfatmyentrance
beforeheslamsintomemaki ngmear chmyback
andhol dhi
mt i
ghter.Het ri
eski ssingmebutIduck
andheendsupki ssingmyneck.Hest ar
tsbei
ng
real
lyroughwhenheseesI '
mr ejecti
nghisaff
ection.
ThisiswhatIwant ed.Iam tryingmybestt okeepi t
down.Hekeepsondr il
lingintomeandmaki ngsur e
hegoesdeep.Hebi t
esmyneckandt hepainsends
meov ertheedge.Webot hcum andhecol l
apses
besideme.Heusedal lhisener gy.Iknowit
sselfi
sh
ofmebuthesai dhecouldhandlemyaddi cti
on.My
addict
ionhasaflaw.WhenIcan'thandlemypast .I
am notlooki
ngforamakel ovesession.Iwantyou
toram int
ome.Makemef eelpai
n.Iclosemyey es
andletmyhandhangov erthebedandasal ways
thedemonundermybedgr absit
.Iletthedarkness
takeme.I'l
lwakeupbett
er.
16
UNYEZI
Iwakeuptosomeonel ookingatme.Iopenmyey es
andI'
m metbyLanga.Isitupandt heburnbetween
mythighsmakesmegr oan.Hisjustsi
tt
ingthere
l
ookingatme.Hewantst osaysomet hi
ngIcant el
l.
Guesshewon'tt
alksoIst andupandheadf orthe
bat
hroom.
"
Uny
ezi
."
,hi
svoi
cesoundsdi
ff
erent
.
Ihal
tinmyst
epsbutdon'
ttur
nback.
"
Lookatme.
"
It
urnaroundslowl
y.Hi
snowst
andi
ngupand
walki
ngtowardsme.
"
Doy
oul
oveme?
"
"
Yes.
"
"
Doy
out
rustme?
"
Wher
eist
hisgoi
ng?
"
Yes.
"
"Youdon'tkeepsecretsfrom someoneyoulov eand
trust
.Whathappened. .
.I'
veneverseenyoulikethat.
Your ej
ectedmyaffection.Youwerehurt
ingIsaw
thatbutthatshoul
dn'tbeanexcuset ohurtothers.
"
Il
ookdownguilt
y.Ican'
thel
pit
.Itj
usthappensandI
can'
tcont
rol
it.
"
Whycan'
tyoutr
ustme?Notonl
ywi
thy
ourbodybut
y
ourhear
tandsoul
."
Hest andsi
nfrontofmewithhi
shandsf
olded.His
gi
vingmeani ntensel
ookandIcan'
tmai
ntai
ney e
contact.
"
Lookmei
ntheey
e."
Il
ookathi
m.Themooni
sst
il
lther
eandt
heocean.
"You'
retroubl
ed.Yourhear
tisatwar.Whydoy ou
keepfighti
ngit
?Yourshipshavesunk.Yourcapi
tal
i
sdy i
ng.Makeanal l
iancewit
hme.Letmehel pyou
fi
ghti
t."
It
ryhol
dinghi
m buthemov
esback.
"WhenIt
ri
edt
ocomf ortandyouscr
eamed.You
scar
edme.It
houghtI'
vedonesomethi
ngunti
lI
l
ookedi
ntoy
ourey
es.Yourey
esl
ookeddead.
"
It
rymov
ingt
owar
dshi
m buthemov
esback.
"
Khuzway
o.Hol
dme.
"
"NoMaGema.Igav eyouev er
yinchofme.It r
usted
youwithmyki ds.Youfai
ltogivemey ourheart.You
fai
ltotrustmewi t
hyoursoul.SoIwon'tholdyou.
YouneedwhatIgi veyouright?Theonlyti
meI '
llhol
d
youiswheny oudecidetousemybodyf oryourown
addict
ionagain.
"
"
Langa.
"
"
I'
ll
ordersupper
.It
oldt
heki
dsy
ouwer
en'
twel
l
."
Hewal ksoutandIst andthere.Hiswor dspl ayi
ngin
mymi ndl i
keabr okentape.Overandov eragain.I
walkintotheshowerandt hewat eriscol d.Isi
t
underthewat erandcr y
.Iwishitwaseasy .IwishI
couldjustpourmyhear toutandl ethimi nbutI '
m so
scaredofmypast .If
eelhandslif
tmeupandt ake
meoutundert hecoldwater.I'
m shiver
ingandIam
goingtocatchacol d.Langasitsmeont hebedand
hesmear sVaselineonme.Hedr essesmei nhis
hoodieandswagpant sandhehai rdr
ysmyhai r.He
st
art
sdoingcor
nrowsandIj
ustsi
tther
e.Hef
ini
shes
hi
scornr
owsandheputsahatonme.
"
Let
'sgety
ouwar
m."
Het ucksmei nandhekissesmyforehead.Ihaven'
t
fel
tlikethi
sforsolong.I
tsbeenayear.It
akemy
phoneassoonashewal ksout.Il
ookforher
number s.'
DrSambo'.Ical
lhernumberanditrings
beforesheanswers.
"
DrSandr
aSambo.
"
"
UhheyDoc.I
tsUny
ezi
."
"
Unyezi
?Thel
astt
imey
oucal
l
edwast
ocancel
t
her
apy."
"Ineedhelp.Pl
easesendt
hatSexAddi
ctGr
oup
address.
"
"
Real
l
y?"
"
Yes.It
hinkI
'
mready
."
"
Youmetsomeonedi
dn'
tyou?
"
"
Theaddr
essSandr
a."
"
Okay
.I'
l
lsendi
tthr
oughemai
l
."
"
Thanky
ou.
"
"
Bye.
"
Idropthecal
l andopenmyf rontcamer aandtake
outthebeani
e.Hi scornrowsar eneat .Iwonder
wherehelearnttodot hat.Ican'
tev endocor nrows
myself.Hewal ksinandhehasat raywi thabowl.
LordI'
m gonnadi e.Whatishebr i
ngi ng?
"
Ican'
tcookbutIknowhowt
omakenoodl
esoup.
Her
e."
Isnif
fandhehandsmeat
issue.Ihav
ear
unnynose.
Iblowmynose.
"
Openup.
"
Iopenmymout handhefeedsme.Iam goingto
thatgroupf
orhi
m andthoset
woki dsint
heli
ving
room butmost
lyme.Hekeepsfeedingmetil
lI'
mful
l
.
Hehandsmepi l
lsandIdri
nkup.
"
Getsomesl
eep.Wepl
ayi
ngv
ideogames.Shouti
f
y
ouneedme."
Hewal
ksoutandasal
waysIletmyhandhangover
t
hebedandthedemonundermybedgrabsi
tandI
f
all
asl
eep.
17
UNYEZI
Isitupinthemor ningandt heheav yfeeli
nginmy
heartisst
ill
there.IlookatLangaandhi sstil
l
sleepi
ng.Ienv yhislongeyelashes.Thouhehas
reall
ythi
ckey ebrowsbutIhav et oadmi tmineare
thickandbushywel l Iam ahair
ybei ng.Helickshi
s
l
ipsandhi seyesf al
teropen.
"
You'
reokay
?"
"
Yes.Canwegooutt
oday
?Thebeachmay
be?
"
Hesit
supstrai
ghtandtheblanket
sf al
lof
fti
ll
his
tor
soexposi
nghisupperbodycausingmet ol
ook
away.
"
Yeah.I
'
llt
ell
theki
ds.
"
"
No.Iwi
l
l.Ihav
en'
tseent
hem si
ncet
heyar
ri
ved.
"
Il
ookathi
m andhi
slooki
ngatme.Hel
ookspai
ned.
"
What
'swr
ong?
"
"
Youpal
e.Yourey
esar
epuf
fy.Damnmami
."
"
Damnmami
?Whot
aughty
out
hat
?"
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
"
Uthandai
zi
nto!
(Youl
i
ket
hings.
)"
"
Damnmami
!"
Ichuckl
eandhesmil
es.Hisgott
hedeepestdimples
andthemostcut
estsmil
e.Hisgotsmall
lazyeyes
andwhenhesmilest
heylooksmall
er.
"
You'
rest
ari
ng.
"
"
You'
reper
fect
."
,Isayabsentmi
nded.
Di
dhej
ustbl
ush?
"
Didy
ou-
?Langa!
",Isayl
aughi
ng.
"
He.
emahnUny
ezi
."
Hest
andsupandhur
ri
est
othebat
hroom.
"
Khuzway
o!"
Hecl
osest
hedoorandIchuckl
e.Thatwassocut
e.
Hi
sphoner
ings.
"
Langay
ourphone!
"
"
Answeri
t.
"
I
tsanunknownnumber
.
"
Langal
akheki
hleKhuzway
osphone.
"
Damnhehasonelongassname.Ir
anoutof
br
eat
hesayi
ngit
.
"
Langa.
",
it
saf
emal
e.
"
Hisnotavai
l
abl
eri
ghtnow.Woul
dyoumi
ndl
eav
ing
amessage?"
"
Whoar
eyou?
"
"
Uny
ezi
."
"
Uny
e-what
?",
hert
onei
sunappr
eci
atedt
hissi
de.
"Ma'
am.Doy
ouhav
eanymessagey
ou'
dli
kemet
o
passon?
"
"Tel
lLangat
hatIknowwhathedi
dtomysi
ster
.Tel
l
him Nt
okozoMayezacal
l
ed."
Shedropst
hecallandIshrugmyshoulder
splacing
i
tdown.Idothebedandhav easmokewai t
ingon
Langa.Hewal
ksoutwithat owel
aroundhi
swai st.I
l
ookawayashewal kscloser.
"
Whowasi
t?"
"
NtokozoMay
eza.Shesai
dtot
ell
yousheknows
whaty
oudi
dtohersi
ster
."
Fearpasseshi
sey
esbef
orehecov
ersi
tupv
ery
quickl
y.
"
Oh.Wewon'tbegoi
nggothebeach.I
'
llcal
lSbhamu
i
n.Ihav
esomethi
ngtodealwi
th.
"
"
Whati
sthat
?"
"
We'
l
ltal
kwhenIgetback.
"
Ileavehimthereandgotakeashower.Hewal
ksin
l
at erdr
essed.Iwal
koutoftheshowerandt
akeout
theshowercap.
"
I'
ll
beoutf
ort
heday
.I'
l
lcal
lyou.
"
Heki
ssesmeandhepecksmyf
orehead.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Hekissesmeonel
astt
imeandwalksoutf
ast.I
hav
emyownshi tt
odealwi
thsoIgetdr
essed.The
boysarewat
chi
ngTV.
"
Goodmor
ning.
"
"
Mama.
"
Langarunst
owar dsmeandIli
fthi
sheavyassup.
Hegivesmeaki ssandhehugsme.Imissedthi
s
l
itt
lef
ell
ow.Iputhim down.
"
Heyma.
"
Nkosi
nat
hihugsmeandhol
dson.
"
You'
reokaynowmama?
"
"
Yes.Mommyhadsomef
lu.
"
"
We'
rehungr
y."
"
Sof
tpor
ri
dge?
"
"
Yespl
ease.
"
Ileavethem wi
tht
heirTVandgototheki
tchen.I
l
istentomusiconmyphone.Isther
eanyonewho
i
sn'thealedbymusi
c?SpeakbyJheneAikocomes
onandIsi ngal
ong.
"
Im mov
ingon.
I
'
m put
ti
ngonmyf
avour
it
edr
ess
Theoney
ouhat
ed
sai
dIl
ookednakedi
n
Fucky
ouropi
nionabouti
t
I
'
mfeel
i
ngbestIwonthi
dei
t.
"
Ipasst hemi rr
orinthehall
wayandInot icehowpal e
Iam.Ismi l
eal it
tl
efor30secondst il
lmybr aingets
themessageandmyhy pothalamussendsposi t
ive
emot ionsthroughoutmybody .Ihearcarspar kingin
frontofmyapar tment
.Iopent hedoorandi tstwo
SUVsandSbhamuandhi smenwal koutandIwav e
andt heynod.Iwal kbackinsideandcheckont he
potsandki ds.Icheckmyemai lsandSandrasent
theaddr essandev ensenttheirphonenumber .I
decidet ocalli
tanditri
ngsf orawhi l
ebef or
ea
femal eanswer s.
"
SexAddi
cti
onGr
oup.Hel
l
o."
"
Hey
.Iwantt
ost
artat
tendi
ngt
hegr
oupmeet
ings.
"
"Okayma'am.Weareopenonweekday
s.Youcan
signinasamemberaft
eronemeeti
ngwit
hthe
group.Fr
om 18pm-
20pm."
"
Thanky
ou.
"
Idr
opthecal
landIt
urnofft
hestov
eanddi
shup.I
l
eavet
hebowlsther
etocoolof
f.
"SoLangawhati
sthi
smeet
ingaboutt
hatI
'
llbe
att
endi
ng?"
"I
'
m enteri
ngapoetrycompeti
ti
on.Soourteacher
wantstotalkt
oourparentsabouti
t.Sheshoul
d'v
e
sentl
etter
sbutpr
ivateschool
sandunnecessary
meeti
ngs."
"
Okay.I'
l
lbet
her
e.Iwantt
omeetmydaught
eri
nlaw
f
uthi
."
"
Shesti
ll
isbeat
ingar
oundt
hebush.It
oldherl
ast
weekt
hatIl
oveher.
"
"
Lov
eher
?",
Iaskhi
ssmi
l
ingsel
f.
"Yes.IaskedDadi fhel ovesyouandhesai dyes.I
askedhi m howdoesi tfeellovi
ngy ouandIquot e
"WhenIseeheraf t
erabaddayIi mmedi at
elyf
inda
reasontobehappy .Shegi v
esmeawhol ezooinmy
stomach.Whenshesmi l
essomet hingtugsatmy
heart.She'
sallIcanst areat.Al
lday .Ev
er y
day.I
don'tmind."andhesai dawhol elot."
Ismil
eandIf eel
abitemot
ional
.That
sthemost
sweetestt
hingI'
vehear
dsomeonesayaboutme.
"
Ist
hathowy
ouf
eel
aboutSamant
ha?
"
Yes.Mydaught
eri
nlawi
swhite.She'
sal
lLanga
tel
l
smeaboutwhenIcal
lthem.
"Yesmommy .She'
ssobeaut
if
ul.It
hinkshe'
san
angel
.You'
reanangel
toomommy .
"
Cut
e.Ismi
l
eandki
sshi
sfor
ehead.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
"
Mom don'
t.
"
"
Comeon.Anygi
rl
?"
"
No/
Yes.
",
theybot
hsay
.
Nat
higi
vesLangaadeat
hst
are.
"
Ahsot
her
eis.Tel
lme.I
sshebeaut
if
ul?
"
"
Moooom.Thef
oodi
sget
ti
ngcol
d."
Heget
supandwal
ksoutonus.MeandLangal
augh.
"
Comel
et'
sgoeat
."
,Isaygr
abbi
ngLangashand.
Wewal
ktot
heki
tchenhandi
nhand.Weseatont
he
barstoolsandgrabourbowl s.We'retheonl
yones
thateatsoftporr
idge.Langalakhel
i
hleisa'meati
s
i
mpor tantformybody .
'wellIguessthatsj
ustthe
MANi nhi mtalki
ng.
"
Doy
ouwantabi
rt
hdaypar
tNat
hi?
"
"
Yes.Somet
hingsmal
lthou.Fewf
ri
endsandt
he
f
amily
."
"
Yourgi
rl
fr
iendwi
l
lcomet
oo?
"
"
Mom.
"
"
Okayokay
.I'
l
lfoundoutwhoshei
sthou.
"
"
OhGod.I
fit
snotdadi
tsy
oumom.
"
"I
'
m sur
eyourf
atherknowsheral
ready
.Hi
ssl
ythat
one.
"
"
Ibeggedhi
m nott
osear
chf
orher
."
Wecar
ryont
alki
ngwhi
l
eeat
ing.
"
Yourphonemama.
"
Langapassesi
toverandit
sLanga.Inev
erchanged
hi
scontactname.I
tssti
l
l"MyeniWam"nanamhlanj
e.
"
Sthandwasami
."
"
Yousoundhappy
."
"
Iam.LangaandNkosi
nat
hihav
emei
nfi
ts.
"
Hechuckl
esbeforehet
alkst
osomeoneont
he
ot
hersi
de.It
sverynoi
sywherev
erhei
s.
"
Wher
ear
eyou?
"
"
I'
m or
der
ingusl
unch.
"
"
Okay
.You'
vedeal
twi
thev
ery
thi
ng?
"
Iemphasi
zeont hedealtpart
.Icoul
dtel
l byhist
one
andbyhisbodyposturethathist
ypeof'deal
ing'was
adif
fer
entbutIdon'
twannaknowsomet hingthat
maytai
nttheli
tt
lebiti
finnocenceIhaveleft
.
"
Yes.I
'
llbehomei
naf
ew.Weneedt
otal
k."
Weneedt otalk?Doesheknowhowt hosewor ds
cangiveoneanxiety
.Ifhewantstotakeabr eak
fr
om usthanbehasanot herthi
ngcomi ng.Hisall
I
gotsoheain'tgoi
ngnowher e.ManIsoundl i
kea
psychori
ghtnow.May behewant st
ot ellmewhat
hewasdealingwith.Idontevenwanttoknow.
May behewant st
o..
.Arghletmestopt hi
nki
ngt oo
muchi
ntot
his.
"
Uny
ezi
?"
"
Uh.
..Yes.
"
"Don'
twor
ry.I
tsnot
hing.I
'
llseey
ouwhenIget
back.
"
"
Okay
."
Idropthecal
l.Whattodo?West ucki
ndoors
ei
therway.Nathi
iswashingthedishes.Heknowswe
haveadishwasherbutthat
sf orwhenthedishesar
e
alot.
"
Langa?
"
"
Mama.
"
Ifoll
owhi svoi
ceandhi sinPluto'
sroom.They
playingandPlutoi sbarki
nghappily.Ijoi
nthem and
wear epl
ayi
ngf etchindoors.Hisroom provi
des
enoughspace.Wekeept hrowingbal l
sandhe
fetchesthem ti
llweal lt
ir
ed.Weal llayonthefl
oor.
Nkosi nat
hipeepsi nandlaughs.
"
Real
l
y?Andy
'al
ldi
dn'
ti
nvi
teme?
"
"
Nextt
imebuddy
.",
Isayheav
ing.ManI
'
m get
ti
ngol
d.
"
Let
'sgo.
"
MeandLangast
andup.
"
Let
'sgoPl
uto.
"
Hejustlooksatuswithhist
ongueout.Hisnot
gett
ingupf r
om thatf
loor
.Wewalkoutofhisroom
andIneedt ogetahousewithabigoutsi
despace
forPlut
otoplay.
"
Wher
e'smyphone?
"
"
Ont
hecouch.
"
It
akei
tandopent
hecamer
a.
"
Sel
fi
e?"
Theyallcomeandsi tnexttome.Wet akepict
ures
andevengol i
veoni nsta.Myfol
lowerslovethekids.
TheyloveLangascut enessandhisblabbermouth
andthegirl
sloveNkosi nat
hismasculi
nityandhis
femini
nelooks.Khuzway owalksinaswegoogl ehi
s
clannames.Weal lstandupandpr ai
sehi m.
"
Khuzway
o.Gumede.Qwabe.Mguni
KaYey
eye.
Khondl
o."
,wegetstuckandIstar
tulul
ati
ngandthe
boysstar
tdanci
ngandtheyarenail
i
ngtheZulu
dance.
Langaislooki
ngatusandsmi l
i
ng.Heputsthetake
awaysdownandmakehi m standinfr
ontofthe
camera.Hest ar
tsdancingwiththeboysandweal l
dance.Weal l
stoplaughing.Hekissesme.
"
Ilov
eyou.I
'
m happyt
oseey
ousmi
l
ingagai
n."
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Ihughi
mti
ght
.
"
Okay
.Wear
eher
etoo.
",Langabur
stsourbubbl
e.
Hetakesmyphoneandst opsrecordingthev i
deo.
Langasitsusdownandshowsust hevideo.Ilookat
myselfandIhavetoadmitI
'm happy.Il
ookatLanga
andthekids.Theset
hreemenmakemehappy .
"
Iboughtl
unch.
"
Weal l
standupandgot otheki
tchenandt hekidsgo
fi
ll
Pluto'
sbowls.WhenIopenthefir
sttakeawayits
pap.Iopenthesecondoneandittri
be.Sohebought
ustri
be?Iopenthethi
rdoneanditssti
llt
ribe.So
mucht
ri
be?I
tsnotl
i
keImi
nd.
"
Wher
edi
dyoubuyi
t?"
"
Thi
sot
herpl
acei
neMl
azi
."
Itakeapi
eceandputitinmymout
h.Myt
ast
ebuds
danceandImoanalit
tle.
"Youeat
ingchi
l
liwi
thmeory
oueat
ingwi
tht
he
kids?
"
"
I'
m goi
ngchi
l
li
."
Iopent
hecupboar
dtot
akeoutpl
atesbuthest
ops
me.
"Usu?Epl
ati
ni?You'
reasomoder
n.(
tri
be?Ona
plat
e?)
"
Het akest het akeawaysandheadst othekit
chen.I
takeoutj uicef orusandhiscastl
eli
te.Isi
tdownon
thematt ool iket her
est.Langapray
sf ort
hef ood
andhi sthef i
rstonet ograbapiece.
"
Imi
ssedt
his.
",
Langasay
s.
"
Iknow.
",
Khuzway
oanswer
s.
"
Sot
hisi
saf
requentt
hing?
",Iask.
"I
tsourl
i
ttl
efamil
ytradi
ti
on.Weusual
l
ydoi
twi
th
aunt
yanduncles.
",
Nathienl
i
ght
ensme.
"
Ihav
en'
tmety
ouraunt
y."
"Shecomesdownforourbir
thday
s.She'
l
lpr
obabl
y
behereformypar
ty.
",Nat
hisays.
"
Whatt
hemeshoul
dwegof
or?
"
"
Blackandsi
l
ver
."
"
Younev
ergowr
ongwi
thbl
ack.
",Iagr
ee.
"
Sowi
l
lyoui
nvi
teAmahl
e?"
,Khuzway
osay
slaughi
ng.
"
Amahl
e?"
,Iam conf
used.
"That
'syourson'sgi
rl
fr
iend.
",
Langasay
sjoi
ninghi
s
dadinlaughter
.
"
Sohernamei
sAmahl
e?I
'
m sur
emuhl
e."
"
Ohy
esshei
s.Mysonchosewel
l
.",
Khuzway
ogl
oat
s.
"
Ican'twai
ttoseeher.We'
l
lhav
eherMr
sPar
tychai
r
r
ightnextt
oy our
s."
"
Mom.Dady
ouseey
ouract
ions?
",Nat
hiwhi
nes.
"
Ican'
twai
t!
",Isaycl
appi
ngmyhands.
Wegetbackt oeat
ingtalki
ngher
eandt here.Ihav
e
totel
lKhuzwayoabouttheSexAddictGroupI'l
lst
art
att
ending.I
'
m goi
ngtot r
yandabstainf
ornow
18
LANGALAKHELI
HLE
Iam drivi
ngtoUny ezi
splacet ofetchher .Shei s
attendi
ngoneofherSexAddi ct
ionMeet i
ngsandshe
askedmet oaccompanyher .Whenshet oldme
aboutitIwon'tli
eIwashappy .Iwasj usthappyt hat
shei sfi
nal
lygettinghelp.Idon'tknowany thing
aboutthisgroupbutshe' sbeencal l
ingmeaf ter
thesemeet i
ngsandshesay sshel ikesthem and
l
ikeshownoonej udgesher .I'
m also'abstaining'
withher.It
saFr idayandshel ef
tforwor kearlyand
wehav eaboutt wohour sbef orehernextmeetupso
Iwanthert osleepov erfortheweekendatmypl ace
andIneedt oconv i
nceher.Ipar kmycarandwal k
outandIknockbef oreentering.She'ssmoki ngweed
byt hesmellofitandPl utocomesandj umpsonme.
"
HeyBuddy
."
Heli
cksmyf acebeforer
unningoff.Iwalkintoher
room andshe'ssmoki
nginjustherg-str
ing.Ihaven'
t
hadsomei ntwoweekssinceshest art
edhermeet
upsandIhav ebeenbeat
ingmyownmeatbutwi th
thatboot
ylooki
ngli
kethatI
'
mtr
yingsohar
dtonot
seduceherri
ghtnow.
"
MaGema.
"
Shesmilesatmeandof fer
smeherj ointwhi
chI
accept
.Herey esarer
edandsmal landshecan't
stopsmili
ng.Iwonderhowmanyoft hesedidshe
smoke.Shegott hest
rongestweedandIstealsome
ofherj
ointssometimes.
"
Uri
ght
?(y
ou'
reokay
)"
Shenodsandshesmi
l
eswi
dert
hist
ime.
"
You'
rer
eal
l
yhi
ghar
en'
tyou?
"
"
Youhav
enoi
dea.
"
"
Howar
eyougoi
ngt
opar
ti
cipat
ewi
tht
hegr
oup?
"
"Ist
il
lhav
etwohour
stocal
m down.Youar
eher
e
earl
y."
"
IknowIwant
edt
otal
ktoy
ou.
"
"
Tal
k?Okay
."
Isi
tnextt
oherandsheclimbsontopofmeandI
sur
pressmygroan.Shecan'
tdothi
stomeri
ghtnow
causeIdon'
tknowhowl
ongIcanhol
don.
"
I.
..Iwant
edt
oasky
out
osl
eepov
ert
hisweekend.
"
"
Aty
ourpl
ace?
"
Inodandcl earmyt hroat
.Sheisgoingtokillme.Her
breastsarealluponmyf aceandI'
m keepi
ngmy sel
f
byf r
equentl
yli
ckingmyl ipsfr
om sucki
ngt hem.I
i
nv entedsexbyUshercomesonandIf eel
hermov e
herwai stt
othebeat .BoKhuzwayohelpasonout
here.
"Ihav
eneverbeentoyouractualpl
aceandIwantt
o
seehowlargeyourgardeni
sandmay bewecan
haveNkosi
nathi
sbirt
hdaythere.
"
"
Yeahi
tsbi
genough.
"
"
Iknowi
tsbi
genough.
",shesay
sseduct
ivel
y.
Shemakesmedownandki ssesme.Iam goi ngto
cum byherj
ustdryhumpingmeal one.Sheistrai
l
ing
ki
ssesdownmyneckandshehel psmeoutmyT-
shi
rt.It
ryt
urni
ngusoverbutsher et
ali
atesandIlet
herhavehermoment.Shetrai
lski
ssesdownmy
chestandshetr
acesherhandsonmydownt omy
pantsandrubsonme.Itrygrabbi
ngherhandbut
shejusti
nsert
siti
nsi
demypant sandt akesmy
al
readyharddicki
nhersoftsmallhandandrubsi
t
upanddown.
"
Uny
ezi
."
Sheshushesmeandpul lsmytrackpant
sdownand
grabsmydi ckwithbothherhandsandshebr
eat
hes
onit.Iam breat
hingreal
l
yheavil
yandmybody
shootsupwhenshel ickstheti
p.
"
Dammi
t!
"
Sheputsmeinandmyhandgoesst rai
ghtt oherhai
r
andgri
psit
.Hermouthfeelssowarm aroundmy
di
ckandIkickof
fmyshoes.Herotherhandpl ays
wit
hmyballsandI'
m pr
aying"Goddon'tletmebust
qui
ck.
".
"
Uny
ezi
.Shi
t!
"
Shedeepthr
oatsmeandIsitup.Sheci
rcl
esher
tonguear
oundandusesherhandtogoupanddown
andhermouthfol
l
owsit.
"
Ify
ouagr
eet
oletmer
idey
ouwi
thnoi
nter
rupt
ions
thanIwon'
tmakey oucum r
ightaway.
",shesay
s
l
ookingupatmeasherhandst il
lmovesupand
down.Ishakemyheadandshedeept hroatsme
againandsqueezesmybal
lsgently
.
"
Fuck!Okay
!Okay
!"
Shesmi l
esandr emov esherunder wearandIki ck
mypant soff.Sheclimbsont opofmeandbal ances
herhandsonmychest .Ihelphergeti tinandshe
wincesabi t
.Mant hewayshef eelsaroundmydi ck
makesmet eary.Shest ar
tsmov i
ngupanddown
andIt hinkthesongpl ay i
ngisPussyFai rybyJhene
Aikoanddon' taskmehowIknowt hat.Shegoes
backandf ort
handshehasherheadf acingupwi t
h
hereyescl osedwi thhermout hopenandIspankher
assandshei ncreasesherpace.Iam gr oaningand
thefactt hatI'
m holdi
ngmy selffrom turningusov er
i
smaki ngmef eell
ikeI'
m onedge.Shecl enchesher
wallsaroundmeasshecumsandt hatcausesmet o
groanandIcum af terher.ThisiswhyIhat ethis
positi
on.
"
ManImi
ssedt
hat
."
,shesay
staki
ngmeout
.
"
Wer
en'
tweabst
aini
ng?
"
"
WewerebutIneededatl
eastoner
oundt
hat
swhyI
madey
oucum quick.
"
"
Mademecum qui
ck?
"
"
Iknowaf ewt
hingsaboutt
hehumanbody
.Damn
mybreat
hesmellsl
ikedi
ck.
"
Webot hlaughandshest andsupt ogowipehersel
f
andsurelybrushherteeth.Igetdr
essedupandI
l
ookatt heti
me.West i
ll
hav esometimelef
t.I
'
m
hungrysoIheadt othekitchenandshehadcooked
soIdishupandeat .Shecomesoutdr essedupand
putsherhandsonherwai st.
"
Youshoul
d'
vedi
shedupf
ormet
oo.
"
"
Sor
ry?
"
Shedragshertonguethroughherteet
handdishes
upforher
self
.She'sgainedalotofweightandher
bootyl
ooksli
keameal .
"
Stopst
ati
ngatmybut
t.
"
Shet
urnsar
oundgi
vesmest
inkey
eandIsmi
l
e.
"
Eatupsowedon'
trunl
ate.
"
Shenodsandsi
tsnexttome.Weeatsi
l
ent
lyand
shepour
smeagl assofwat
er.
"
Let
'sgo!
"
Shet akesmyhandi nhersandsmi lesatme.She' s
beenv er
yaffecti
onat elat
ely.Sheev encallsme
whenshef eelsdownandl et'smehol dher.Icansee
agr eatchangesi ncehermeet ingswi t
hthatSex
Addi cti
onGroupst ar
ted.Iopent hedoorf orherand
j
umpi ntoghsdr iversseatbef oredriv
ingof f
.Shehas
herhandonmyt hi ghandIkeepst eali
ngglancesat
her.She'sreallybeautif
ul.Shei sveryhairy.Herface
i
shai r
yandshehasal i
ttl
emoust achewhi chIf i
nd
cute.I'm st
il
llookingforherf ami l
yandwemi ght
haveat r
ace.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
Il
ookatherandshe'
ssmi
l
ing.
"
Ilov
eyout
ooMaGema.
"
Shesqueezesmyt hi
ghandl
ooksoutsideher
windowagain.Ist
il
lhav
etot
ellheraboutme
searchi
ngforherfamil
y.Ineedherasmywife.I
needherbymysi deforever
.She'
smypeace.The
onlyswimmerinmyl onel
yocean.
19
UNYEZI
"Iwaskidnppaedfor11y earsbymyf ather.Hekept
mei nthebasementandev ery
onedeemedme
missing.Hehadturnedmei nt
ohi ssl
ut.I
'dfal
l
pregnantandhe'dgivemeabor t
ionpi
ll
s.Itwasthe
mostpai nf
ulpai
nI'v
eev erfelt
.I'
vehad5abor ti
ons
alr
eady."
Shecr
iesandhermotherholdsherhandwithtear
s
i
nhereyesandIenv
yt hatbutIhaveLanga.She
cal
msdownandcontinues.
"Ihadt oomanyunpr of
essionalaborti
onst hatIhad
ani nfectionandIt houghtIwasdy ing.I'
dlaythereat
nightandI '
dhearmymot herprayIcameback.I
want edt oscream andl etherknowIwasunderher
kitchenf l
oor.Whenhecameasusual when. mom
wasouthef oundmel ayi
ngsi l
ence.Ihadlost
consci ousness.Hecal ledanambul anceinpani c.
Themostst upi
destmov ebutsmar tmov e.Iwokeup
i
nhospi taland.
..Mymot herwast herewitha
det ecti
ve.Myf athernextt othem l
ookingatme.I
blabbed.Itol
dthem ev erythi
ngishispresence.He
wasar rest
edbutt hefearinmef ol
lowedmear ound.
Ihadlosttheabili
tytopr oduce.Iresor
tedtocrack
andIsleptwitholdmen.Iwasanaddi ctofsexand
drugs.Mom nev erstoppedpr ayi
ng.Ialmostdied
causeIwasoncr ackov erdose.IknewIhadt oseek
help.Spentayeari nrehabbef or
ecomi nghere."
Thegroupissil
entabitwithev er
yoneholdi
ngback
thei
rtear
s.IboughtLangaov ertodaycauseIwast
o
openupt hedeepestofsecretsofmy sel
f.
"
Thanky
ouSer
ena.Uny
ezi
."
Il
ookedatthewomani nchar
geoft
hisandIlooked
atLanga.Henoddedatmeandatearfel
lfr
om my
eye.
"Iam Unyezi
Sosi
boasy
oual
lknow.Il
i
vedi
nan
orphanage.I
-"
Il
ookatLangaandhesqueezesmyhand.
"Thef
ir
stt i
mei thappenedIwas18.Theywer e3
boysal
l ofthem li
vedintheorphanage.Ist
il
l
remembert heirnamestil
ltoday.St
hembisowasthe
l
eaderthefirstonetotai
ntmyi nnocence.I
'
venev
er
cri
edsomuchi nmyl i
fe.Esethuheldmymout hshut
.
Vuyowast helastoneandwhenhewasdonehe
spi
ll
edhissperm onmyf aceandcal l
edmeasl ut
.
Whentheywer ealldoneSt hewalkedtowar
dsme
wit
hapocketkni fehecar ri
edaroundandmadean
exonmyi nnerthigh.Theirwassomuchbl ood."
IchokeonmysobandLangapul
l
smecl osert
ohi
m.
Hisgri
pisf
ir
m ar
oundmeandhisjawkeepson
mov i
ng.
"Istoodupandcl eanedt hebl ood.Iscrubbedt i
llt
he
ti
lewascl ean.Iwoul dscr ubmy sel
ftil
lIbledbutI
stil
ldidn'tfeelclean.Itcontinued.Count l
esst i
mes.I
knewIhadt ogetoutoft here.Isleptwithai nvestor
i
nt heor phanageandhegotmeaj obasaPAata
l
awf ir
m.Ist art
edusi ngkenf orsexualpleasure.Igot
addictedt ot hewayt heymadef eelandIlikedhav i
ng
them succumbt ome.Ondar kday sI'
dget
flashbacksandt hewayoutofal lthatpainwassex.
Notanyki ndofsex.Ther oughsex. "
Il
ookdownast ear
sstr
eam downmyf aceandf
or
onceIacknowl
edgedwhathappenedt
ome.
"
Noamountofsexwil
lmakei
tal
lgoaway
.",
Langa
whi
sper
edi
nmyear .
Hewasv er
yt enseandhekeptf l
ari
nghisnose.I
rubbedmyhanddownhi sarmsandhel ookedatme.
Theoceanwaswi ldandt hemoonshinedbright
er.
Hispissed.Ilaymyhandonhi sshoul
derasmy
tearskeptfalli
ng.Somet hingfel
lonmyhandt hat
wasonhi st high.Water?Ilookedupandthere
wasn'tanysi gnofdrippi
ng.IlookedatLangaandhe
wascr yi
ng.Igav ehim ahugandhi sbodyshooki n
myar ms.
"Di
smissed.Wehav ei
ndiv
idualsessi
onsfr
om nex
t
weeksi
ncewef i
nishedourlastt
alker
s."
Ist
oopupwi thhi
mi nmyarmsandIwal
kedus
out
side.Westoodineachot
her
sarmsandhisbody
wasshakingm.
"
Khuzway
o.Cal
m down.
"
Hel
ookedatmeandIwi
perhi
stear
sandst
oopon
myt
oestokisshi
sey
es.
"
It
'snoty
ourf
aul
t.I
tsnotmi
neei
ther
."
Henodsandopenst
hedoorf
ormebef
orehoppi
ng
i
ntohi
sseat
.
"
Wef
etchi
ngy
ourcl
othes?
"
"
Yes.
"
Hedri
v eswit
hhishandonmi ne.If
eel
li
ke
somethinghasbeenli
ft
edoffmychest.Ist
eal
gl
ancesathim andhecatchesme.
"
Ilov
eyou.Thanky
ouf
orbei
ngwi
thmet
oday
."
"
Ilov
eyou.I
'
m al
way
sher
efory
ou.
"
Thatpai
nont hesi
deofmystomachshotbackandI
gri
maced.Ihadfor
got
tenaboutt
hat.Iev
en
devel
opedamkhaba.Icl
osemyey esasthepai
n
hi
tsmylowerabdomen.
"
Shi
t!
"
"
What
'swr
ong?
"
"
Ihav
ethi
spai
n.Mmmh.Fuck!
"
HetakesalefttoDurdocPriv
ateHospi t
al.Ihat
e
hospi
tal
s.Ifeelwetnessi
nmyor i
gin.Il
ookdown
andmylightbluejeanshaveblood.Peri
ods?Ihavent
hadthem i
n2mont hs.Il
ookatLangawit
hmyey es
wide.No!Godpleaseno!Irememberwehav en'
t
beenusingprot
ecti
onandIhav en'
tbeentaki
ng
morningaft
ers.
"
I'
m bl
eedi
ngLanga.
"
Helooksdownandhi seyesgowideandhi
sspeed
excel
erat
es.Iscream asi
tget
sworseandfort
he
fi
rstt
imeeversinceIwasmeIpraytosomeone.
"Idon'
tknowwhatI 'vedonet ohaveyouhateme
Godbutpl easedon'ttakemybabyawayf r
om me.
Please.I
'
vel etyouletthingshappent omeandthis
ti
mear oundi fi
tiswhati tispleasedon'
tl
etit
.Ibeg
you.IswearI '
ll
star
tbel i
eving.Justdothi
sonething
forme.Il
ldomor egood. "
"
Baby
?",
Langaaskswi
deey
ed.
Theywheel meawayassoonast heyseeusandhi s
questionremainsunanswered.Iam sedat edcauseI
am scr eamingfort
hem t
osav emybaby .Ican'tl
ose
anotherpartofme.Iwon'tsurvi
vei t
."BoSosibo
abahle.Helpadaughterout.Ngiyani
celaboGema.
OMshi ngil
a.OThusi.
"AndIloseconsci ousness.God
i
fmysuspi ci
onsar ecorr
ectt
hanIbegyou.How
comeIdi dn'
tnoti
cesoon?Iwasgaini
ngalotof
wei
ght.Myst omachhadgr ownpl
umper.Mymoods
wereeverywhere.Ihopeit
snotwhatIt
hinki
tis.Let
i
tbesev ereperi
odpains.
20
UNYEZI
"
Langaanswerme.
"
Hekeepslookingatmewithredeyes.Ihavebeen
aski
nghim whathappenedandhisjustl
ookingat
me.Ablackfemalewalksinadoctorscoatandshe
cl
earsherthr
oat.
"
Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngma'
am?
"
"
I'
minpai
n."
Shewalksuptomeandchecksthesehospi
tal
devi
cesbefor
ewri
ti
ngev
erythi
ngdown.
"
Whathappened?
"
"
Youwer
e9weekspr
egnant
."
"
Wer
e?"
"
Yes.Youl
ostt
hebabyma'
am.
"
Icl
osemyey
es.IguessI
'
m notGodsf
avour
it
e.
"
Whatcausedi
t?"
"
Wear
edoi
ngt
est
sandwai
ti
ngonr
esul
ts.Doy
ou
smokema'
am?
"
"Yes.Idi
dn'tknowIwaspr
egnantt
hou.Iwoul
d'
ve
stopped.IswearIwoul
d'
vest
opped.Thi
sismy
faul
t."
"We'r
enotsurewhat'st
hecauseofthemi scarr
iage
ma'am.I'
llbekeepi
ngyouheret
il
lthetestresul
ts
areready.MrKhuzwayosai
dthefoetuswillbe
buri
ed."
Shewal ksoutandIcan' tev
encr y.Atleastiftears
escapedI '
dcr yi
tal
lout.Idi
dn'tnoticeIwas
pregnant.SureI'
vegainedabi tofweightandal lbutI
j
ustthoughti twasbecauseI '
m happy .Ilookat
Langaandhehashi sheadi nhishands.I 'm surehe
blamesmef orthi
s.Iwassosur emyl if
ewast aking
adiffer
entstep.Iwassosur et hatI
'll
finall
ygeta
chancet obehappybutIguesst hatisnotf orme.
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
Hel i
ft
shisheadupandhest
aresatmer
ighti
nthe
eye.Hisoceani
sreal
lywi
l
dandhismoonisver
y
dark.
"
It
snoty
ourf
aul
t.Ishoul
d'
veusedpr
otect
ion.
"
"
We'
rebot
htobl
ameont
hat
."
"
Ical
ledt
hef
ami
l
y.They
'r
eout
side.Shoul
dIl
ett
hem
i
n?"
Inodslowl
y.Iwantt
ocrysobadbutnothi
ngi
s
comingout
.ThewholeKhuzwayoclanwal
ksi
nand
ther
eisagir
landanoldmanwiththem.
"
Sawubonandodakaz
i.
",t
heol
dmansay
s.
Hisr
eall
ynotthatol
dbuthehasafewwri
nkl
eli
nes
andtheresembl
anceint
hisr
oom i
sser
ious.
"
NgiwuBabawabafanabakaKhuzway
o.(
I'
mthe
f
atheroft
heKhuzwayoboys.
)"
If
igur
ed.Theyst
andar
oundt
hebed.
"Langatol
duswhathappened.Hast
hedoct
orsai
d
anythi
ng?"
"
No.Theywai
ti
ngont
her
esul
ts.
"
"
Theywon'
tfi
ndamedi
cal
expl
anat
ion.
"
"
Sor
ry?
"
Ndabenkul
uopenst
hedoorandt
ell
ssomeoneto
comein.Aver
ygoodlooki
ngwomandressedi
n
tr
adit
ionalbeadsandcl
othswal
kedinaft
erhi
m and
stoodatthefootoft
hebed.Il
ookatLangaandhe
nodsatme.
"Sosi
bo.Gema.Thusi
.Mshi
ngi
l
a."Shechant
smy
clannames.
I
'
m st
il
lver
yconf
usedast
owhat
sgoi
ngonher
e.
"Nayiindodakaziyenuil
andel
waifuel
imnyana
ngenxay ezonozikanyoko.
(Her
eisyourdaught
er
beingfoll
owedbyadar kcl
oudbecauseofher
mot herssins.
)"
"Sondelani
kuyeni
mboni
sei
ndlel
aegodukay
o.(
come
closerandshowhert
hewayhome.)
"
Shest
art
sgr
unt
inganddanci
ngar
oundt
her
oom.
"
Ngi
thi
vumani
bo!
"
"
Siy
avuma!
".
Shest
opsandl
ooksmest
rai
ghti
ntheey
e.
"Yourmot hercommi t
tedasin.Hersinsareonyou
andt heancestorshadtakenawayy ourdaught
er.
Youneedt ogohomeandapol ogi
seony our
mot her'
sbehalf.I
snotyoumi ghtaswellkil
l
y
our
sel
f.
"
Di
dshehav
etobesoi
nsensi
ti
ve?Shewal
ksout
.
"Idon'
tevenknowmymot her.WhydoIhaet obe
theonesuffer
ing?If
uckenhateherandi
fIf
indher
ali
veI'
l
lcutherwombout !
"
Langahol dsmeandbei ngi nhisembr acet r
igger s
somet hingm andIl etthet earsfall
.Whydoesmyl if
e
alway stakeal eftwhenI '
m happy ?Whydoesi thav e
tobemet hatsuffers?Mymom i spr obabl yli
v ingin
peaceandher eIam.Il ostmychi l
df orsomet hingI
hav enoknowl edgeabout .Idon'tbel i
ev ein
tradit
ional st
uffbutIhav et odot his.Wher ethef uck
am Igoi ngt ofindmyf ami l
y?Icr yev enl ouderand
Langaj ustholdsme.Shesai ditwasadaught er.
Theyt ookawaymybabygi r
l.AllbecauseIwas
birt
hedbyasnakeofawoman!Idon' tthinkI'l
l
bouncebackf r
om this.Imi ghtaswel lkillmy selfas
thattraditi
onal doctorsaid.Ihav ebeent hroughso
muchal readyandj ustwhenIt houghtIwasget t
ing
myhappyendi ngthishappens.
"
Iboughty
ousomef
ood.
",t
hegi
rlsay
sandsmi
l
es
atme.
"
I'
m notr
eal
l
yhungr
y.Ij
ustwantt
ogohome.
"
"
Dadcanor
gani
set
hatbuti
fonl
yyoueat
."
Langat akest hefoodfrom herandgr absaspoon.
Themoodi nmywar di ssot enseandsombr e.My
heartachessobad.Langahasn' tcri
edorsai d
anything.Hef eedsmeashi sf at
herwalksout .I
mov emyf aceawayaf ter4spoonsandheput sit
away .Hegoesbackt ohiscor nerandsitthere.
Everyonel ookssosad.Il aydownandhol dmy
stomach.Il etthetearsfallagainandmysobsar e
theonl ythinghear dinthatwar d.Anotherpartofme
takenawayf orcef
ull
y.Whydopeopl ethinkthatthey
cant akef r
om myl i
fealltheywant ?
21
LANGALAKHE
Ithi
nkwhathur t
st hemostist hatwedi dn'tknowwe
wereexpect i
ng.Itwasthereandi twasgone.Noone
would'vepreparedmef orthi
s.WhenUny ezi tol
dher
storyandIhear dhersobssomet hinginsi
deme
mov ed.Ican'tbeli
eveourfel
lowbr ot
hersbr eak
womenl i
kethis.Dadhadgot tenUny ezidischar ged
andhei ssadt hathehadt omeetherl i
ket his.We
weredoi ngalri
ghtandthishadt ohappen.Uny ezii
s
sit
ti
ngint hepassengerseatwi t
hherheadf acingup
andherey esclosed.Shehasherhandsonher
tummy .NgibongauMamabyBl aqDiamondandI
bli
nkawayt het ears.
"Ngi
bongauMamangempi l
oengi
nayo.Ungi
khuki
se
uwedwangingenababa.Ohashabal
alaamaphupho
wakho.Wazini
kel
akiminjengomt
anawakho."
Shesingssoftl
ybefor
easobbr eaksout.Shecri
es
real
lypainf
ull
yandlet
'soutascream.Istoponthe
sideoftheroadandeveryonedoestoo.Iopenmy
doorandheadf orher
s.Iopenitandtakeherinmy
arms.Wesitonthefl
oorandshecri
es.Ihol
dmy
tear
sback.Ineedtobestrongf
orher
.Mybrother
s
andsist
ercroachi
nfrontofus.
"
Stophol
dingi
tbaf
o.Khal
a(cr
y?"
,Khul
ekani
say
s.
Ishakemyheadandpul
lUny
ezi
closerasherhol
d
ti
ghtensonme.If
eel
alumponmyt hr
oatandItr
y
swallowi
ngi
t.
"
Khal
andodana.
(cr
yson)
",Dadsay
s.
Ican'tcry
.Ifwebot
hcrywhoisgonnacomf or
tthe
other.Sheneedsmeasst r
ongasIcanbe.Thando
tr
iespulli
ngUnyezi
from myeyesbutIhol
dher
ti
ghter.
"Letmet akeUnyezi
.Comeonbhut i
.She'sst
il
li
n
painandhol di
ngthi
stightt
ohermighthurt
her."
,Thandosayspull
i
ngUny ezi
awayfrom me.
Theywalkt oDadscarandtheydri
veoff.Ir
emai
non
thefl
oorlookingatwheret
hecarwent.Sheneeds
me.ItrystandingupbutBheki
khayapushesme
backdown.
"
Whatdi
dIt
eachy
ouLanga?
",Dadsay
s.
"
Thatr
eal
mencr
y."
"
Nowwhyar
eyounotdoi
ngdo?
"
"
Ihav
etobest
rongf
orherBaba.
"
"
Andwhodoy
ouex
pectt
obest
rongf
ory
ou?
"
"
Obaf
o.Nawe.
"
"
Andwecanbestrongfort
hebot
hofy '
al
l.Handal
l
y
ourl
eadstoNdabenkul
uandhe'
l
lresumelooki
ng
f
ort
hegir
lsfami
ly
."
Il
ookatNdabenkul
uandhenodsandpat
smy
shoul
der
.
"
Khal
abaf
o."
Iputmyheadonmyhandsandthefi
rstsobescapes
mylips.Theysi
tnex
ttomeasIcr
y.
"
Tear
sofpai
n.
Ani
nnocentl
i
fel
ost
.
Hermot
her
swombl
eftempt
y.
Herf
ather
shear
tscat
ter
ed.
Tear
sofabr
okenman.
Cr
iesofabr
okenwoman.
Anangel
lostt
otheancest
ors.
Asacr
edsoul
takeni
nrev
enge.
Adaught
erpay
ingf
orhermot
her
ssi
ns.
Herwai
l
spi
erci
nghear
ts.
Hi
ssobsr
ingi
ngoutt
othewor
ld.
OKhuzway
obasezi
nhl
ungwi
ni.
Wehol
dhands.
Wecr
ytoget
her
.
Wehadal
ll
ost
.
Adaught
er.
Ani
eve.
Asi
ster
.
Agr
anddaught
er.
Mayhersoul
resti
npeace.
Weshal
lkeepheri
nourhear
ts.
Hersoul
li
vi
ngamongstusal
l
.",
Bheki
khay
asay
sthi
s
poem andmysobsf
all
insy
ncwi
thKhul
ekani
s
hummi ng.
Iremembert hisritual
ofour s.West ar
teddoi ngi t
whenmot herdi edandDadwassad.Bheki khay a
fr
eest y l
edapoem aswehummed.Wecar r
iedon
doi ngitforev eryoneofuswhowassad.I tnev ergot
old.Theyhel pmeupandIl etBhekikhayadr i
v e.My
criesar ehear dint hecarasDadkeepsont ell
ingme
tol etitall
out .I'
venev erf
eltsomuchpai nbef ore.I
can' tevenremembert helasttimeIcriedafter
Bongeka.Weal lgetoutafterthecarisparked.We
wal kinsideandThandoi sinthekitchenwithher
elbowsont hecount erandherhandsent winedand
herheadbal ancedoni t.
"
Amen.
"
Sheendsherpr ayerandlooksatus.Shenodsatme
andIheadt omybedr oom andIfi
ndUny ezisi
tt
ing
ont opofthebed.Hereyesneverlookedsodead.I
sitnexttoherandholdherhand.Ifeelastr
ongurge
topr ay
.Ipul
lUnyezidownwi t
hmeandwegoonour
knees.Ican'
tpraybutI'
ll
try.
"
God.
"
Wor dsgetstuckonmyt hr
oatandIj ustcry.Weboth
cryonourkneesandshehol dsmecl ose.GodIcan'
t
sayany t
hingbuthearmycr i
es.Myhear tsaysal
lI
wantt osay.Ihavetofi
ndherfamilysoon.Wehav e
todot henecessarytohel
pherfindpeace.Iwas
goingtofatheradaughter
.IhearthedooropenandI
l
ookupt ofi
ndLangaandNkosi nathi
.
"
Mkhul
utol
dus.
"
Langajustthrowshishandar oundusandcr ies.
Nkosinathij
oinsinandwemour nthedeathofour
daughterandt hei
rsister.Wegoi ngt
ogetthrough
thi
s.Wehav eto.Ij
ustneedal i
ttl
emoretimet o
comei ntotermswi t
hy ester
day sact
ivi
ti
es.
Bhekikhayaspoem pl aysinmyheadandIf eelmore
tear
sf l
owdown.If eel aheadachecomi ng.
22
LANGALAKHE
It
sbeenweekofpai nandtears.Dadhadgot ten
Uny ezialeav ebutnoonet oldheritsbecausehe
ownst hecompany .Wedecidedt obur ythef oetus.I
t
hadn'tdev elopedr eall
ybutwev er
ytradi t
ional.We
arealsogoi ngt ohav eacleansingcer emonyf or
Uny eziandDadsuggest edthatIgetcl eansedt oo
sinceI'mt hef ather.Wealsof oundal ead.Itsi na
vil
lagenotf arf r
om our sandifitsthecor rectlead
thanwe' reidiots.IgocheckuponUny ezioutside.
She'slayingont hegr asswit
hLangaandNkosi nathi
andt heyar elookingatt hemoonandst ars.She
reall
ylovest hemoon.Il ovethemoont oobuther .
Uny ezi
.Themoon.Shehast akenal ikingoft he
gardenandshespendsmostofhert imeher e.
Thandost andsnextt ome.
"
She'
sbeaut
if
ulbhut
i.
",sher
emi
ndsme.
"
Herbeaut
ysuppr
essest
hatoft
hemoon.
"
"
She'
sUny
ezi
aft
eral
l
."
West
andt
her
elooki
ngatt
hem andInudgeThando
sowewal
ktowar
dst
hem.
"
Mama"
,Langacal
l
sout
.
"
Boy
."
"
Daddysay
sSphi
woi
sinheav
en.
"
Shesmil
esatl
ooksatmoon.Imi
ssedseei
ngher
smil
e.
"
Hiswr
ong.
"
Haai
!
"
Thanwher
eisshe?
"
"
Upt
her
e."
Shepoint
satthemoonandwealllookup.Thando
si
tsnexttoNkosi
nat
hiandIsi
tnexttoLanga.
"
Mommyl
ovesy
ou.
"
"
Daddyl
ovesy
out
oo.
"
"
Bhut
iLangal
ovesy
ou.
"
Bhut
iLanga?Weal
lchuckl
e.
"
Bhut
iNkosi
lov
esy
ou.
"
"
Aunt
ylov
esy
out
oo.
"
"Mkhulul
ovesy
ou.
",dadsv
oicemakesust
urn
around.
"
Mal
umel
ovesy
ou.
"
Mybrot
her
sal
lfol
l
owandIt
akeUny
ezi
shand.She'
s
get
ti
ngabi
temoti
onal
.
"
Mkhul
u."
"
YeboMzukhul
u."
"
Sphi
woi
swi
thGogo.
"
Mydadsmil
eswit
htearsi
nhi
sey
es.Af
teral
lthese
year
shest
il
ll
ovesher
.
"
Ilov
eyouMkami
."
Wealll
ookupatthemoon.Il
oveyouMa.Ismil
e
andki
ssUnyezi
shand.Shehasgi
venusherl
ovefor
themoon.
"
Thandower
en'
tyousupposedt
ocal
lthem f
or
f
ood?"
"
Iwasbutt
hismomentwasbet
tert
hanf
ood.
"
Ihel
pUny
ezi
upandIki
ssherf
orehead.
"
Ilov
eyoumamawabant
wanabam.
"
Shesmi
l
esandwi
pesawayhert
ear
s.
"
Ilov
eyoubabawabo.
"
Ihugherandsher etur
nsit.Inevergetoverherhugs.
Theyar ethewar mestandsof t
esthugsI'v
eev erhad
aftermoms.Iki ssherheadandIl ookatthemoon.
Twomoonsi nmyl if
e.Whatmor ecouldIeverask
for?Wewal kinsideandwej oinev er
yoneonthe
fl
oor .I
tsfamil
ynightasThandocookedAf ri
can
breadandTr i
be.Langapr ayandwedi gi
n.Ifeed
Uny eziasmuchasIcan.Shehasl ostwei
ghtbut
she'sstil
lasbeauti
fulasthefirstdayImether.
"
Wef oundtwol
eadsony
ourf
ami
l
y."
,Ndabenkhul
u
f
il
lsherin.
"
Onei
neGugwi
nianot
heri
nSwazi
l
and.
"
"
eGugwi
ni?Justar
oundt
hecor
ner
?",
dadasks.
"
Wewillheadther
eafterSphi
woset
husbur
ial
and
y
ourcl
eansingceremony."
"
Whati
f-
"
"
Nowhati
fsmakot
i.
",Khul
ekani
int
err
upt
sher
.
It
akeanot
hersl
i
ceofuj
egqeandf
eedher
.
"Whenyouall
doneeati
nggotosleep.Weleave
ear
lytomor
row.Sphi
wosbodyhasar ri
vedandGogo
Pumleiswai
ti
ngonus.",
dadsay
sst andi
ngup.
"AndwenaLangal
akhel
i
hle.Thepoorki
disf
ull
."
,he
scol
ds.
Iputthesl
i
cedownandKhul
ekani
laughs.Ihel
pher
standupandt
heboysfol
l
owus.
"
Yousl
eepi
ngwi
thus?
"
"
Yes.Wepr
omi
sedmom.
"
God!I
tsanotherni
ghtofKarat
efrom Langa.Langa
makesuspraybeforewegetintobed.Assoonas
hefal
l
sasleephelandsaslaponNkosi nat
hi.
"Shi
t!Hay
iBaba.I
'
m gone.
",Nkosi
nat
hisay
srunni
ng
away .
Langaturnsar oundandki cksmystomachandI
groan.Shi
t!IholditinasIdon'twanttowakeUny ezi
up.IfhekicksmeI '
l
lpinchhim.Ifal
lasl
eepwit
h
Langassleepingv ert
ical
ly
.Itsgonnabealongnight.
23
UNYEZI
Iam wakenupbyaf ootinmymout h.Imov eLangas
footaway .Isi tupst raightandl ookt oKhuzway os
sideandi t'sempt y.Iheart heshowerr unningandI
standup.Il ookatmy selfinthehugemi r
rorinhis
room.Myey eshav eey ebagsundert hem andI 've
l
ostabi tofwei ght
.Ist andt hereforaf ewmi nutes
andt heheav inessi nmyhear tpushesmedownon
myknees.Thandohasahugei mpactonmyl if
er i
ght
now.She' sdoi ngpsy chol ogysoshest andsasmy
psy chol ogist.Wespendmostoft het imet ogether
talking.I '
vel etheri nt hedar kestdept hsofmet hat
evenLangadoesn' tknow.Wear eleav i
ngt odayfor
herbur i
al andmyhear thurts.Il
etthet earsasIt ry
keepi ngqui etsoLangal ami doesn'twakeup.
Thandoswor dscomet omi ndli
ket heyal waysdo
whenI '
m aboutt obreakdown." Pray.Nopai ncan
beatpr ayer .Pr ay.Iknowi tgetstir
ingt alki
ngt o
someoney oucan' tseeandwhodoesn' trespondbut
Hehear sy ou."Igeti nsideKhuzway oscl osetand
kneel down.
"God.Thepainiswei ghingmedown.Ihav esuffered
enoughandIam st artingtothinkI'my ourl
east
favouri
te.Iwasstil
ltryi
ngtoheal f
rom otherwounds
andawoundbi ggerandmuchmor erawopenedup.
Idon'thaveenoughst rengt
ht of i
ghtawayt hepai n.
I'
m holdingontothel astbi
tofhopebutI '
m slowly
sli
pping.Whydoesi thurtsomuch?Whydoesi t
havet ocutsodeep?WhydoIhav etobet heone
sufferi
ngforanotherpersonssi n?SomeoneIdon' t
evenknow.I '
mt i
red.Emot i
onallyandphy sical
ly
.I
don'tknow..
.Idon'tknowhowt otakethenextst ep.
Myf eetareheavy.Justhearmeoutt hisonce.Let
thepainsubside.Please."
,Il
etmy sel
flayont he
groundandIsob.
Howl ongdoesi tt
akebef or
ethepaingoesaway ?I
cryasIlayont hef l
oorinLangascloset.I
thurt
sso
bad.Ididn'
tev engetachancet oattendonedoctors
apartment.Shewast hereandthenshewasgone.
Mycr i
esgetl ouderasIr epl
aywhathappenedint he
car.Whydi dn'
tIgot othedoctorwhenIf i
rstf
eltt
he
pains?!I
tsmyf aul
t!Mine!
LANGALAKHELI
HLE
Iwal
kouttheshowerwithLangal
amileaning
agai
nstmyclosetdoorwi
thtear
sstr
eami ngdown
hi
seyes.
"
What
'swr
ongboy
?"
"
Mama.She'
sinpai
nBaba.
"
Iwal
ktowar
dst
hedoorandIhearhercr
ies.
"
Got
oNkosi
nat
hi.I
'
llt
akecar
eofmom.
"
Henodsandwal ksaway .IopenthedoorandUnyezi
i
slay i
ngonthefloorherbodyshakingasshecri
es.
Myhear tbl
eedsatthisscene.It
akeherint
omy
armsandshecr i
esonmychest .Il
etmyownt ear
s
escape.Herhandsgripmet i
ghterasshecri
es
harder.
"
Sthandwasami
."
Shel
ooksupatmeandhertear
sdon'
tst
opf
lowi
ng.
Sheevenhashi
ccupsnow.
"
Whydoy
oudot
hist
oyour
sel
f?"
"
Ithur
ts*
hiccup*somuch.
",shesay
sasasob
br
eaksout
.
"
Iknow.Ithur
tsformetoobuty
ouwantt oknow
whatgi
vesmet hestr
engt
htoholdone?
"
Sheshakesherhead.
"
You.Theboy
s.Myf
ami
l
y."
"
Atl
easty
ouhav
eaf
ami
l
y."
"
Atl
eastWEhav
eaf
ami
l
y."
Shelooksatmecr
ies.I
'
mtr
yingt
omakey
ouf
eel
bet
ter.
"
Wantt
oknowwhathel
psmehol
donmor
e?"
Shenodsandwipeshert
earsbutf
ail
sasmor
e
comeoutandIclosemyeyes.
"Yourlovefort
hemoon.Yougav eusthebestgif
t
ever.Wheny ousaidmydaughterwasi nt
hemoon.I
knewt hatever
ynightshe'
dbef ol
lowi
ngmear ound
allni
ght.IknewthatwheneverImissedherI
'dlook
upatthemoon. "
"
Doy
ouev
erwonderwhatshewoul
d'
vel
ookedl
i
ke?
"
Ismi
l
eandbr
inghercl
osert
omeandmakeherf
ace
t
hemi
rr
ori
nthecl
oset
.
"Shewould'
velookedli
keus.Wit
hyourbeauti
fulski
n
andlov
ingpersonali
tyandshe'
dhavemyey es,
nose
andsmile.
"
"
Andt
hedi
mpl
es.
"
"
Obv
iousl
y.Thedi
mpl
esar
ethechar
m."
"
Wel
li
tst
heey
esr
eal
l
y."
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
"
You'
renoti
nthi
sal
one.
"
ShehugsmeandIhel pusup.Il
iftherupandwal
k
tothebathr
oom.Shehastotakeashowercausewe
don'twantDadbr
eat
hingdownournecks.Shewalks
i
ntheshowerandIsitonthetoi
letseat.
"
I'
ll
ber
ighther
e."
Shenodsandstarttakingashower .Myeyestrai
l
downherbodyast hewat ercascadesdownher
body.Shehasbeautif
ul l
egsthatareconnect
edto
themostthi
ckestthi
ghs.Shehasasmal lwai
stand
av erysmal lstomach.Thani tst hetit
ti
es.Theyar e
l
ikemyj oy sti
ck.Iuset hem tocont rolev erypartof
herbody .Ilovet hestret
chmar ksonherass.She
hasat attooont hesideofherboot y"mybody .my
art.
"andIwantt otakeapi ct
uresobad.Iputmy
handov ermyboner .Sheturnsar oundandmyey es
got oherbel l
ybut t
on.Shehasabel lybut ton
piercingandIl ov eit
.Myey esgot ohert it
sandher
nipplesar eer ectandt hewat ercascadi ngdown
them.Il ickmyl ipsandclearmyt hroat.I'm sti
ll
ina
towel andI 'm notdoi ngagoodj obathi dingmy
bonerasherey esgost r
aighttoi tandshel aughs.
Glady oufindt hisfunny.
"
Wozal
a.(
comeher
e.)
"
Ishakemyheadandshel
aughsatme.
"
Woza.(
Come)
"
"
GezaUny
ezi
.(
bat
hUny
ezi
)"
"
Iwanty
ourhel
pangi
thi
.Cany
ouwashmyback?
"
Igroanandst
andupanddiscardthetowel
.She
tur
nsaroundandIt
akethescrubberfr
om her.We
haven'
tbeeni
nti
matesi
ncewel ostourbabyand
havingherasst
hiscl
oset
omydi
cki
sdr
ivi
ngme
crazy.
"
Khuzway
o."
Istopstari
ngandreal
iseIhaven'
tstar
tedwhasing
herback.Istar
twashingherbackandsheputher
handont hewallasIwashherupperback.Ifeelher
asstouchmydi ckandIgroan.She'
sdoingthison
purpose.
"
Uny
ezi
."
"
Mmh"
"
Ha.
a(no)
"
"
Ngenzeni
?(whatdi
dIdo?
)"
"
Qhubekauzobona.
(car
ryony
ou'
l
lsee.
)"
Shepushesherassnearerandi
ttakesever
ythingi
n
metonothol dheri
nplaceandseparat
eherlegs
andenterherfr
om behi
nd.
"
MaGemakhuzeka.
(ber
epr
imanded.
)"
"
Kodwangenzeni
?(butwhatdi
dIdo?
)"
"
Okokugci
nangi
kukhuza.Qhubeka.Uzophumal
a
ungakwazi
ukuhamba.(
thi
sisthel
astti
meI'm
repr
imandi
ngyou.Car
ryon.You'
ll
getouther
e
unablet
owalk.
)"
Shei gnoresmeandpushesherassf uther.If
eelmy
dicktwitchandIholdherwaistandseparateher
l
egswi t
hmyl egs.Ir
ubmy sel
fonherandInot ice
she'salreadywetsoIenteranditf
eelsli
kehome.
"
Khuzway
o."
Shesst i
llhasherhandsont hewal landIgr aba
fi
stfulofherhair.Ipumpint oherreal hardandIl et
myf rustr
ationsout.Il
etgoofherhai randhol dher
ti
tandbr ingherupt ome.Herheadi sonmy
shoulderandherbacki sar chedasIpumpi ntoher .
Hermoansdr i
vemecr azyast heyescapeherl ips.I
rubonhercl i
tandshescreamsoutmynameasshe
cums.It urnoffthewaterandpi ckherupandl ayher
ont hebathroom floor
.Iputherl egsonmyshoul der
andent erher.ShemoansoutasIgodeeperandshe
scratchesmyback.Thesl appingofourf l
eshandmy
groansandhermoansar eallthatcanbehear d.By
thesoundwemaki ngIcant el
lsheisev enwetter .
ShecumsandIf uckherthroughheror gasmst illI
cum andshesquir
tsal
lov
erme.Il
etgoofherl
egs
andtheyfal
lbesi
demeshaki
ng.Webothbr
eathi
ng
heav
ily.
"
WasIt
oor
ough?
"
Shenodsandsmi
l
es.
"
Sor
ry.
"
"
Itwasntt
hatbad.Myscal
pandboobhur
tst
hou.
"
"
Sor
ry.Ij
ustl
etev
ery
thi
ngout
."
"
It
sokay
."
"
Cany
oust
andup?
"
"
Myl
egsar
eshaki
ngIdoubt
."
Ipi
ckherupandshe'sst
il
l dri
ppi
ng.Iputherontop
ofthet
oil
etseatandgowetat owel.Iwi
pemy sel
f
andIwetitwi
thwarm water.Iwi
peherandshe
hi
sses.
"
Mycl
i
tisst
il
lsensi
ti
ve.
"
"
Sor
ry.
"
Iwi
pehercl
eanandpi
ckherup.It
akeoutmy
swagpantandhoodieforher.Ihel
pherdr essupand
shemakesthebedwhi leIgetdressed.Icheckt
he
ti
mewhenI '
m doneandwear edead.We' r
eanhour
l
ate.Wewalkoutandheaddownst air
s.It
sempt y
.I
headtotheki
tchen.Thereisanoteont hefri
dge
wit
hDadswr i
ti
ng.
"
Wheny ou'
redonebangi
ngdr
iveaf
terus.Wel
eft
t
hina.Dad.
"
Ilaughandtaket
hekeysandthecont
aineront
opof
thecounter
.We'l
leati
nthecar
.
"
Wher
ear
ethey
?"
"
Theyl
eftus.Wedr
ivi
ngour
sel
ves.
"
"
Isi
tfar
?"
"
No.I
tsabout4hour
saway
."
Ihandherthecontai
nerandsheopensi tandtakes
outapieceofwors.Itel
lthemanl ef
taroundt
he
housetolett
hehousekeeperin.Igetint
othedriv
ers
seat.
"
Ourl
uggage?
"
"
Theyt
ooki
twi
th.
"
Shenodsandcar riesoneat i
ng.I'
m gladshehasa
bitofappeti
te.Idriveoffplayi
ngmaskandi andI
knowshe' l
li
nsertherphoneassoonassheget s
boredsoIenj oythemoment .Istealaglanceather
andshecat chesmeandsmi les.Iknowitstil
lhur
ts
butwe'll
getov eriftogether.
24
UNYEZI
Hepar ksi
nav er yhugeyar
dt hathasnicel
ybui l
t
roundhousesbui ltar
ounditandinthemi ddleisa
bigmoder nhouse.Heopenst hedoorf
ormeand
therearedogs,catsandchi
ckensr unni
ngar oundthe
yard.Achickencomest owardsusandIst and
behindLanga.
"Ha.amahnUny
ezi
.Ay
il
umi
.(
noman.I
tdoesn'
t
bit
e.)"
"
Ha.
aKhuzway
o."
Hesi
ghsandgivesmeapiggybankandwalkst
oa
r
ondavel
nearbywit
hsmokingcomingoutt
he
wi
ndows.AChinadogpassesus.
"
Putmedown.
"
"
Hay
imahnUny
ezi
."
HeputsmedownandIr unaftert
hedog.I
tschi
l
dish
ofmebutseei
ngt
hisdogj ustmadememi ssPl
uto.
Thedogst
opsandlooksatme.
"
Heybuddy
.Wozal
a."
Hewalksaway.Thatwasrude.It
akeacatt hatis
walki
ngpastandstr
okeit
.Itmakesthat"gr
rr"sound
andIsmil
e.Il
oveanimal
sexceptchicken,
cows,
goatsmantheli
stgoeson.
"
Uny
ezi
!"
Il
ookatwher
eLangai
sst
andi
ngandIwal
ktowar
ds
hi
m.
"
Leavethepoorani
mal
sal
one.Theywai
ti
ngony
ou
i
nsi
de."
Iputthecatdownandi twalksaway.Iwal
kt owards
Langaandhehol dsmyhandaswewal kinsideand
thereissmokeeverywhere.Thesmokestingsmy
eyesandIf eelmychestcloseupbutImaintai
na
strai
ghtface.
"
Sani
bonani
."
,Igr
eett
heel
der
s.
"
Sawubonamakot
i.
"
Makoti
?Uhokay.Isi
tdownonthematnextt
o
Thandoandwesmi l
eateachot
her
.
"
Ninj
ani
kodwa?
(howar
eyou?
)"
"
Siy
azamazamaBaba.
(wet
ryi
ng.
)"
Theol
dmanstandsupandburnsi
ncenseandhe
cal
lsmeandLanga.Wekneel
besi
deshim.
"Khuzwayo.Gumede.Qwabe.Mguni kaYeyey.
Khondlo.Osidlabehl
ezibakaPhakathwayo.Abathi
bebedlabebey engaumunt ungendaba.Nay i
nkosanayenui yakhal
aza.Izenomawabant wana
bakhe.Balahlekel
wey i
ndodakaziisaseswini
.(
herei
s
yourson.Hecamewi ththemot herofhischil
dren.
Theymostadaught erwhileshewasst il
li
nher
mot her
swomb. )"
Thewomanwhowaskneel i
ngnearhi m st
art
s
makingsound.Ir ecogniseherfrom thehospit
al.She
star
tschantingandsomeonebeat sadr um andshe
danceswi t
hhershoul ders.I
'veneverbeeninsucha
si
tuationbeforeandIt hi
nkitsbeauti
fulhow
Afri
canscani ndulgei
nsuch.Bei ngblackhast obe
mybi ggestfl
exrightnow.
"
Niy
avuma?
!",
shesay
sgr
oani
ng.
"Yebosi
yav
uma.
"
"AboKhuzway
obathimakangakhali
umawengane.
Sibani
keimpi
loy
engane.Bebefunaeyakho.
(The
Khuzwayosar
esayi
ngt
hemotheroft
hechil
dmust
notcr
y.Wegaveawayt
hechi
l
dslif
e.Theywant
ed
your
s.)
"
Huh?Idon'
tunder
standthi
s?Whywouldthe
Khuzwayosbefi
ghti
ngformyli
fe?I
'
m noteven
marri
edtoLangayet.
"UKhuzway oOmdalaathiungokhet
hekil
e.
Umphef umlowakamawenganeugade
yibo.
(Khuzwayoseniorsaysyou'
rethechosenone.
Yoursoul i
sguar
dedbyt hem.)"
Heregoest
hischosenonenonsenseagai
n.She
st
opswitht
hegrunti
ngandthedrum st
opstoo.
"Wewil
ll
aySphi
wosbodytorestt
omor
row.Wewi
l
l
cl
eansethemot
herandf
ather
."
Langasfathernamedmydaught er.Ilovethename.
Shewasgi ft
.Andt hanshewast aken.Hersoul in
exchangeofmi ne.Theyshould'
veletmel i
veabi t
l
ongert i
l
lIgavebirthandthantookme.Shedi dn't
deservetodiebeforeshehadev enf ull
ydev el
oped.I
wipeawaymyt earsandIwalkoutt her ondavel.I
walkdownt owardswhatseem likemount ains.Isi
t
atarockf arfr
om sightwhenIf eel
somet hingfur
ry
brushagainstmyl eg.Ilookdownandi t
st hecatI
wascr addli
ngearl
ier.Ipickitupandputi tonmy
thi
ghs.Itssti
llsmallanditspurewhi t
ewi t
habl ack
tai
l.I
tmeowsatmeandIgi ggle.
"YouknowIhadami scarr
iage.Idi
dn'tevenknowI
waspr egnant .Iam sur eshewasgonnabebeaut i
ful
.
I
tsherf uneral t
omor row.Webur yi
nga2mont h
feotus.Unusual Iknow.I thurtstoknowt hatal
lof
thisismyf ault.I
fmay beIhadsear chedformy
familysooneri nli
f eIwould'vefoundoutaboutt hi
s
blackcloudf oll
owi ngmear ound.May beI'
m st
arti
ng
tolosemymi nd."
,Igi
ggl eattheend.
"
ImeanIam t
alki
ngt
oacat
."
I
tpur
rsasIst
rokei
tsf
ur.
"
Uny
ezi
."
It
urnar
oundandLangai
sst
andi
ngbehi
ndme.I
di
dn'
thearhi
m.
"
Arey
ouokay
?"
"
Yeah.Ij
ustneededt
obeal
one.
"
Hesighsandt
akeshi
shandsoutofhi
spocketand
si
tsnextt
ome.
"
Iknowi t
spainful.Pl
easestophurt
ingyour
sel
f.We
l
ayinghertoresttomorrow.Youcancryasmuchas
youwanttomor row.Todayjustbemymoon.My
Unyezi
.Ineedy ou."
Il
aymyheadonhi
sshoul
derandwel
ookatt
hesun.
"
Lett
hepoorcatgonow.
"
Il
eti
tgoandi
tgoesi
nthedi
rect
ionIcamef
rom.

Thesunissetti
ngnowandwel ookingatithol
ding
hands.Themountai
nscreateaperfectsceneand
weembr aceeachother
spresence.
"
Uny
ezi
."
"
Khuzway
o."
"
Cel
aungi
shade.
(pl
easemar
ryme.
)"
Il
aughathim andwhenIlookathim hei
sseri
ous
soIstoplaughi
ng.Theskyispi
nkandorangeand
helookssohandsomer i
ghtnow.Il
ookint
ohiseyes
andt heoceanisascalm andthemoonstrawber
ry.I
knowt hesescene.Heishappy.Il
ookatthesunand
him again.DoIwanttomar r
yhim?Yes.Inod.
"
Yes?
"
"
Yes.YesI
'
llmar
ryy
ou.
"
Hekissesmeandli
ft
smeup.Hest
art
sdanci
ngt
he
Zul
udanceandstar
tswhi
stl
i
ng.
"
NinaboKhuzway
o!Wadl
aMguni
kaYey
e!"
Hei ssoZul ukodwa.Hedi dn'
tevenhav eari
ng.He
takesast reakofgr assandt i
esitaroundmyleft
mar r
iagefinger.Ilaughandheki ssesme.Ishould
stopwat chingmov i
escauset hi
swasnotadi nnerat
anexpensi verestaurantwherehewoul dkneeldown
andaskmet omar ryhim Ihaveimagined.
"
Ngi
yakhut
handa.
(Il
ovey
ou.
)"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
"
Ngi
thengi
yakut
handaMaGema.
(Isai
dIl
ovey
ou.
)"
"
Nami
ngi
yakut
handa(
Ilov
eyouaswel
l
.)"
Heki
ssesmeandwel
ookatt
hel
astbi
toft
hesun
set.Il
ookatmyl efthandandthegrassisnicel
yti
ed
aroundmyfinger.Ican'twai
ttot
ell
themoonabout
thi
smoment .IknowSphi wowouldbelisteni
ng.
25
UNYEZI
"
Uny
ezi
.Let
'sgetgoi
ng.
"
Ishakemyheadandwi
pemyt
ear
sasIpl
aywi
tht
he
sandonthet
omb.
"
Mkami
please.
"
Hel i
ftsmeupi nbri
dalsty
leandIcr yonhi sneckas
hehol dsandexi tst
heKhuzway oCemet er
ythatis
downhi llfr
om t hey
ard.Hewal kswithmei nhis
armsashet ri
essoothi
ngmewi thwords.Wehad
l
aidhert or estafewhoursagoandI '
vebeent her
e
since.Ijustneededtoleti
tallsinkin.I'
m get
tinga
headacheandmyey esaredroopyandsor efr
om all
thecry i
ngI'vebeendoingsincelastnight.
"
Sleepst
handwasami
."(
Myl
ove)
Isni
ffhisscentandthescentofhi
scol
ogne
soothesme.IrelaxmytensebodyasIal
lowsl
eept
o
consumeme.

"
Nyez
ivuka.
"
AhandshakesmeandIopenmyey
esandy
awn.
"
Sor
rybuti
tst
imef
orcl
eansi
ng.
",Thandosay
s.
IgetoutofbedandInot
iceLangahadchangedme.
"
Pleasepassmet
hatdr
ess.
"
Shehandsmet hedr essandIst r
ipandweari t.I
'm
notonet oweardr essesandskirtsheckIdi dn'teven
ownonebutLangaboughtaf ewformyt riptot he
rural sett
lement
.Thi sdressisveryl
ongt hou.I ti
s
ti
ghtf r
om mywai stupandf l
owsdownwar dsnot
givingmuchawaybutl eavi
ngsomet hingfor
i
magi nati
onasmyasspopsoutabi t
.Iwr apadoek
andI '
m notaneatdoekwr appersoitsjustwr apped
fort hesakeofwr apping.
"
Wher
e'sLanga?
"
"Hi
swaiti
ngatthekr
aal
.Isuggesty
ouwearno
undergar
mentsasyouaregonnabest
ri
pped
naked.
"
"
Huh?
"
"
Yes.Come.Let
'sgo.
"
Shedr
agsmeout
sideourr
ondav
elandt
heai
ris
calm.Shepoi nt
smet owar
dsthekraalandI
approachit.Ther earecowsinsi
deandIcansee
Langakneel ingnexttoGogoPuml ebarefootand
shir
tl
ess.Ithi nkthi
sisthemostsexiestI'
veseen
him.HisblackLev i
sjeansarehunglowonhi storso.
Hesignalsf ormet ocomei nwithhishandandI
shakemyheadcausi nghimtostandupandwal kup
tome.Hest andsbyt hegateofthekraal
.
"
Ngena.GogoPuml
eist
alki
ngt
otheancest
ors.
"
"
Thecows.Whati
ftheychaseme?
"
Hechuckl esandopenst hekraalbeforepulli
ngme
i
nside.Istickcl
osetohi m aswewal kpastsl eepi
ng
cowst othemi ddl
eofthekr aal
.Wekneel besides
GogoPuml eandshest art
schantingandshedances
around.Istil
lwonderwhyt heycallher'
Gogo' cause
shelookst obeinherlate30sandshel ooksv ery
beauti
ful.
"
Wozani
.Khumul
ani
.(
come.St
ri
p.)
"
Westri
pnakedandkneeldown.Langahol
dsmy
handasshepoursuswit
hwaterthatsmel
lver
ybad
andmakeusdrinksomethi
ngfrom t
hecal
abash
thattastesli
kei r
onandshi t
.Iholdmy selff
rom
gaggingandav erycoldshiverrunsthroughmy
spineandIf eelLangashivertoot el
l
ingmehe
experiencedittoo.Istar
tfeeli
ngapr esencebut
whenIl ookar oundthereisnoone.
"Wozandodakazi
.Bi
ngelel
auyihl
ononyoko.
(come
daught
er.Gr
eetyourf
atherandmother
.)"
Anal binosnakeaboutt helengthofat ablespoon
crawlst ousandIcan' tseem t orecognisethesnake.
Itcomest owar dsusandpassesusandwe
i
nst r
uct ednott olookbackt i
llwear ri
veatour
rondav el.Wear et oldnottot akeabat htonightand
thatwat erhadgr assoni tandi t
sitchy.GogoPuml e
walksi nf r
ontofuspr aisi
ngourcl annamesaswe
foll
owherwi thoutl ookingback.Ist ar
eupatt he
moonandIsmi leal i
tt
le.Wewal kinsi
deour
rondav elandwesi tont opoft hebedi nsil
ence.I
takeof fthedr essandt ossi tonthechai randLanga
discardshi sj
eans.
"
Wesmel
lhor
ri
ble.
",Isayandhechuckl
es.
"
That
sbecausewesmel
ll
ikecowshi
t.
"
"
What
?"
"Theyusedcowshi
ttheyputi
nthatwat
er.
Tomorrowthey'
l
lbr
inginI
ntel
ezi
."
"
Int
elezi
."
"
Let
'sj
ustsayi
tsgonnabet
hemostpai
nful
bat
hof
y
ourli
fe.
"
Helaughsandget si
nsidethebl
ankets.Cowshi
t?I
t
hinkI'
ll
v omit
.Igeti
nbesidehim andhemakesme
l
ayonhi schestandIli
stentohi
shear t
beat
.
"
Whatwaswi
tht
hesnake?
"
"
Thatwasourdaught
er.
"
"
How?
"
"Shetooktheform ofasnake.Iguessshet
ooky our
familyfor
m si
nceourancestorsshowinthefor
m of
grasshopper
s."
"
Wei
rd.Ver
ywei
rd.
",Isaycl
osi
ngmyey
es."
Ilov
e
y
ou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Hebr
ushesmybackandIt
raceov
erhi
stat
tooswi
th
myfingerandwelayi
nsil
ence.Theheav
inessinmy
hear
tisnotasheavyany
morebutIknowi t
'l
ltake
somet i
mebefor
eIhealcompletel
y.
26
UNYEZI
Iscrat
chmy selfasIsitont hebed.Wewerewoken
upearlyandbat hedinInt
elezi.Myski
nissoi
tchyi
t
burns.Langaislaughingatme.
"
Stopl
aughi
ng.
"
Heki
ssesmyl
i
psandl
aysont
hebed.
"
Stopscr
atchi
ngy
our
sel
f.You'
remaki
ngi
twor
se.
"
Igi
vehi
m adeat
hst
areandcar
ryonscr
atchi
ng
mysel
f.
"Scr
atchyour
sel
fonemor
eti
meandI
'
llchewy
our
nail
soff.
"
"
Geez!Fi
ne!
"
Igetupandstar
tdr essingup.Hespanksmeonmy
wayout.Iwalki
nsidet hekitcheni
nthemainhouse
andthewivesar
ecooki ng.Istoponmyfoot
srepsas
mynamei smentioned.
"ThatUny
ezit
hinkswewi
llcookf
orher.Shecan'
t
keepachil
dandshecan'
tevenfi
l
lherhusband'
s
stomach.Withthosebast
ardchi
ldrenbraggi
ngmy
food.Theyshouldgofi
ndthei
rfather
."
Iwalkinsideandtheyst
opt al
ki
ng.Theonewi ththe
bi
gmout hlooksatmeandcl i
ckshertongue.Ipour
myselfsomewat erinaglassandlookatthem asI
dri
nk.
"Tel
lme.Soy ouopenafancl
ubwi
thoutmy
knowledge.Wantaut
ogr
aphs?"
Theot herwiv
eslookawayandcar
ryonwithther
e
chores.Theblabbermout
hwholooksl
ikeshes18
fol
dsherar ms.
"Andyou.Youl
ook18.Youhearbl abbi
ngyour
mouthaboutanindependentwomanwhor ecei
vesa
paychequeinakit
chenthatsnotevenyour
s."
Shecli
ckshert
ongueandIbefor
eIwalkoutt
he
ki
tchenIt
wistmywristl
andi
ngwateronherf
ace
andIputthegl
assdown.
"
Callmykidsbast
ardagainI'
llst
rangl
eyou.I
miscar
ri
edbutselfr
espectissti
llt
her
e.Can'
tsay
t
hesameabouty outhou."
Iwal koutasshewi pesherf ace.Ievenlostmy
appet i
te.Iwalkdownhi llandIsitonmyr ockand
pickupr ocks.Didsher eall
yhav etobringupmy
mi scarri
age?Iwipeal onet earandt hr
owr ocksi
n
theai r
.Itwasn'tmyf ault
.Istandupandwal k
towar dsthecemet ery.Ienterandt heauragetst
hick.
Ikneel overgraveandcar esshert omb.
"Mommyhasbeendoingsogoodeventhoughmy
bodyi
sit
chyandal
l
.",
Ilaughandsni
ff
.
"SomebodysaidIfail
edtokeepyoutoday .I
tal
most
soundedtr
ue.Ial
mostbel iev
edit.We'
regoingto
l
ookf ormyfamil
yt odayandI'
m soscared."
Isni
ffandwi
pemyt
ear
s.
"
Mama.
"
Itur
naroundandt
heboy
sar
est
andi
ngout
sidet
he
cemeter
y.
"
Boy
s?"
"
They
'r
ecal
l
ingf
ory
ou.
"
Inodandtheywalki
nfrontandIwal
kbehi
nd.
Nkosi
nathicomeswit
hwat erf
ormetowashmy
handsbef oreIenterthey ar
d.Wewal khandinhand
totherondav elki
tchen.Thegi r
lfrom ear
li
erisonthe
matcryingdr amaticall
y.Theboy swalkoutasIsit
onamatt oo.TheKhuzway obrot her
sareseated
nexttoeachot herandt hereisanol dmant oo.
Langasf atherl
eftafterthefuneral.
"MaGema.Thobani
swi
feSi
yandasay
syouhav
e
usedfor
ceonher."
"
For
ce?
"
"
Sheal
sost
atedt
haty
ouspi
l
twat
eronherf
ace.
"
"
Oht
hat
.Iact
ual
l
ywant
edt
odr
ownheri
nthesi
nk.
"
Khul
ekani
laughsandSi
yandacr
ieshar
der
.
"
Hai
bo!Langakhuza.
(r
epr
imand)
"
Langal
ooksatmeandInoticehi
sjawt
ick.Hecan
getpi
ssedall
hewantsbutIwon'
tbeni
cetoher
aft
erwhatshesai
daboutme.
"
Justapol
ogi
zeUny
ezi
."
,Langasay
s.
Sonooneiswil
l
ingt
ohearmysi
de.Il
ookatThando
andsheshr
ugs.
"
Iwontbeapologi
zi
ng.Shecanbashmeal l
she
wantf
orwhateverr
easonbutnotLangaand
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
Istandupandwal koutf
uri
ousl
y.Asf orIusedfor
ce
onher !Sheinsul
tsmeandcallsameet ingonme?
She'sbulshi
tti
ngme.IenterourrondavelandIhead
forthebathroom.Iwashmyf aceandIheart hedoor
openandcl ose.Ipeekandit
sLanga.Hel ocksthe
doorandwal kstowardsme.
"
Uny
ezi.That
'snothowt
hingsar
edonei
nthi
s
f
ami
ly.
"
"
Thany
'al
lai
n'
tdoi
ngshi
t.
"
"
Goapol
ogi
ze.Youowet
heel
der
sanapol
ogyt
oo.
"
"Whatshoul
dIapologi
zef
or?Doi
ngsomet
hing
aboutanupti
ghtt
eenager
?!Angi
funi
!"
"
Don'
trai
sey
ourv
oiceatme.
"
"
Voet
sek!Uzowenzani
?"
HelooksatmeandIr
egr
etsayi
ngt
hat
.Hewal
ks
cl
osertomeandImoveback.
"
Uzokhal
aUny
ezi
.(
you'
l
lcr
y.)
"
"
Ngizokhal
i
swayi
niLangal
akhel
i
hle?
(Whatwoul
d
makemecr y)
Her
unshi
stongueov
erhi
steet
h.
"
Ngi
zokushay
aUny
ezi
.(
I'
ll
hity
ou)
Igul
pandl
ookaway
.
"
Hambauy
oxol
i
sa.
(goapol
ogi
ze)
"
"
ButIam noti
nwr
ong.
"
"
Idi
dn'
tsayy
ouwer
e."
Hesit
sdownandpatst
hespacenextt
ohim.I
'
d
rat
herst
andher
e.Hewant
edtohitmenotsol
ong
ago.
"
Iwon'
thi
tyou.
"
Isi
tbesi
dehi
m andhelooksmeint
heey
es.The
moonandoceanneverl
eavi
ng.
"Meleuyi
yekheibhar
iizenzeicl
ever
.Wenaclever
uzenzei
bhari.
(youshouldletanidi
otactsmar
t.And
youactdumb.)"
"Butshesaidsomereal
l
yhurtf
ulthi
ngs.Shesai
dI
couldn'
tkeepababyandIcan'
tkeepyoufull
.She
basi
cal
l
ycal
l
edmeaf
ail
ureofawoman.
"
"I
'
m sor
ryst
handwa.Goapol
ogi
zesowecanav
oid
drama.
"
Inodandhekissesmehungr
il
y.Hel
aysmedown
andhishandgoesundermydr
essandher
ubsmy
cl
itontopofmypanty.
"
Langa.
"
"
Mmmh?
"
"
Themeet
ing.
..apol
ogy
.",
Isaywhi
l
emoani
ng.
"
Aft
ert
his.
"
Hetakesmydr essoffandIhelphi
m outofhi
s
cl
othes.Hepositi
onshimsel
fbefor
eslamminghar
d
i
nsidemeandIscr eam gr
abbinghi
m.[REMOVED]
[
REMOVED]
Inodandhekissesmehungr
il
y.Hel
aysmedown
andhishandgoesundermydr
essandher
ubsmy
cl
itontopofmypanty.
"
Langa.
"
"
Mmmh?
"
"
Themeet
ing.
..apol
ogy
.",
Isaywhi
l
emoani
ng.
"
Aft
ert
his.
"
Hetakesmydr essoffandIhelphi
m outofhi
s
cl
othes.Hepositi
onshimsel
fbefor
eslamminghar
d
i
nsidemeandIscr eam gr
abbinghi
m.
"
Langa!
"
Heholdsmyhandsont opofmyheadashepumps
i
ntome.Itspainf
ulpleasureandheisn'
tstoppi
ng.
Herubsmycl i
twithhisotherhandandjustasI'
m
abouttocomehest ops.
"
Langa.
"
Het
akeshi
msel
foutandIsi
tup.
"
Goapol
ogi
ze.
"
"
Langa.Atl
eastl
etmecum.
"
"
Weren'
tyouswear
ingatmeear
li
eron?Nowy
ou
wantmetomakeyoucum?"
Iwassocl
oset
ocummi
ng.Hei
spuni
shi
ngmel
i
ke
thi
s?
"
LangaI
'
m sor
ry.I
'
mreal
l
ysor
ry.
"
Hekissesmeagainandheenter
smesl owl
y.He
holdsoneleguptomychestandhepenetr
ates
deeper.Hi
sgoingsl
owandhisbangi
ngmesogood
thathi
srubbingonmycl
it
.
"
Langa.
"
"
Youl
i
ket
his?
"
"
Yes.
"
Heholdst
heot herlegandIar
chmybackt owards
hi
m andmybr eastscomeincontactwi
thhiswarm
chest
.Hecir
cleshiswaistandImoanoutloud.Thi
s
shoul
dn'
tendcausehi sdoi
ngmesogoodr i
ghtnow.
"
Yes!Yes!Ri
ght
!Ri
ghtt
her
e!"
Iscr
eam asIcum andhemakesmel
i
eonmy
stomachandputsapi
ll
owunderme.Hespreadsmy
l
egsasheentersme.Hestaysst
il
lforamoment
andIpushmyasstowardshi
m andhestar
tsmovi
ng.
Igri
ptheshi
tsashekeepsonhit
ti
ngmyspot
repeat
edl
y.
"
Fuck!Aaaaah!Langa!
"
Il
if
tmyassupandgoesdeeperandIbur ymyface
i
nt hesheet
sasIscream i
npleasur
easIar
chmy
backandcurlmytoes.Icl
enchmywall
saroundhi
m
asIfeelabuil
dcoming.
"
Shi
t!Shi
t!FuckUny
ezi
!"
Webothcum toget
herandhef al
l
sont opofme.We
st
ayli
kethataswebreatheheavi
ly.Herol
l
sontothe
si
de.Hel
ooksatmewi thbeadsofsweatonhisface.
"
Rai
sey ourv
oiceatmeagainandyou'
ll
regreti
t.
Ngi
zokushayangempel
a.(
I'
ll
hity
ouforreal
)"
"Theonl
yt i
meyoushoul
dshoutatmei
swhen
you'
reundermeshouti
ngatmetogodeeper
."
,he
saysgett
ingup.
Icov
ermyf
aceasIsmi
l
e.Langai
ssonast
y.
27
UNYEZI
"
Letmegrabanappl
efr
om t
heki
tchen.I
'
llf
indy
ou
i
nthecar
."
,Isaywhi
l
eki
ssi
nghi
scheek.
Iwalktotheki
tchenandSandisi
weisther
ecooki
ng.
Iwalkinandshesmirks.Langamademeapologize
earl
i
eronandshet hi
nksshewon.Igetanapple
fr
om thefri
dgeandgetakni f
eandIpeeli
twhi
le
l
ookingather.
"
Pleasegetout
.Iwantt
ofi
nishcooki
ngf
ormyi
n
l
awssincesomeofusaremarri
ed."
Il
aughandpoi
ntt
hekni
fe.
"Lalel
alawenaskhwamasedi cki
es.Igr
ewupi nt
he
hood.I'l
lsl
icey
ourfuckencli
toff.I
fyoueverbea
bitchtowardsmeIwi l
landoht r
ustmesisi
.Khozo
gone.(l
ist
enhere.Cl
itgone.
)"
Iwalktowar
dsandsl
icehercheeksandblood
tr
ickl
esdowntoherwif
eatti
rethatseemswaytoo
hottobeini
nthi
shotweather.
"
I'
m sor
ryf
orusi
ngf
orceony
ou.For
giv
eme.
"
Ichuckl
eandwal
kbutst
oponmyst
epwhenIgett
o
thedoor.
"
Ohandnoonewi
l
lknowaboutt
his.
"Isaysmi
l
ing.
Ithrowt heknifeatherandsheducks.Iwal kout
whilebi ti
ngtheappleandI '
m sopi ssedbutI'
m
smilingsoLangadoesn' tnotice.If
eltl
ikepuking
whenIsai dsorryi
nf r
ontoft hewhol efamil
y.
Nothi ngpissesmeof fmor et hanbeingputont he
standf orsomet hi
ngIdidn'tcommi t
.Theboy sare
l
eav ingwi thKhukekaniandThandoasi tisschool
tomor r
ow.
"
Pleasebehav
e."
"
Mom.Weal
way
sdo.
",
Langasay
s.
"
You?Shame.
"
IkissthecheeksandNkosinathigoesonabouthow
oldhei snow.Igeti
nthecarwi th
Bhekikhaya,
Ndabenkhul
uandLanga.They
accompany i
ngmeandIknowt heyj
ustwantt
ishoot
atanyonewhot ri
essomething.
"
You'
reokay
?",
LangaasksandIsmi
l
e.
"
Yeah.I
'
m good.
"
HenodsandIlookoutthewindowasmaskandi
bl
ast
sinthecarandIthinkI
'
llgetaheadache.They
st
opeMzimkhulutogobuysomef ood.
"
Wecan' tgotoanot
hermanshouseempt
yhanded.
",
Ndabenkhul
uhadsaid.
Theycomebackandputever
ythi
ngint
hebackseat
.
Theysmokeout
sideandLangaopensmydoor.
"
Smoke?
"
Il
ookatt
heci
gar
ett
eandIr
ememberIhav
en'
t
smokedi
nawhil
e.
"
No.
"
Hel ooksatmeandsmi l
esandIreal
isehewas
testi
ngme.Mxm.Icl osemydoorandIjustl i
stento
thissongt hat'
spl
ayi
ng.Idon'
tunderst
andhow
someonel i
stenst
othiski
ndofmusic.Itsgivi
ngme
aheadache.It akeoutmyearphonesandpl aysome
Kehlani.Isighandsi
nkbackintomychai r
.Nowt hi
s
i
smusi c.Theygeti
ntothecarandLangadr iv
esof f
.
HeshakesmeandIopenmyey eswhil
ey awning.I
guessIf ellasl
eepal ongtheway .Ilookatt hey ar
d
wepar kedout sideofandt heiri
s2r ondav elsand
onemai nhouset hatdoesn'tl
ookt hatmuch.The
yardisempt yexceptt heol
dmanwhoi ssitting
underat reeshade.Wegetoutoft hecarandI
almostt r
ipont hislongskirt
.Icli
ckmyt ongue.We
standatt hegateandt heoldmanj ustlooksatus.
Langar aiseshishandandt heoldmanl ooksaway .
Suchr udeness.Agr oupofboy spassingbyl ookat
us.
"
Ishoni
izi
thakazel
ozakhe.
(sayhi
scl
annames.
)"
Welookatt
heboysandt heypass.Ndabenkhul
u
st
epsfor
wardandtakesofhishatandholdsitwit
h
hi
skneesali
tt
lebentandhisbackbentabitfor
ward.
"Sosi
bo!Gema!Mshingi
l
a!Thusi
!Ncobeni
!Si
sacel
a
ukungena.
(pl
easel
etusin.
)"
Theoldmanlift
shishandupandscr eamsfor
someone.Amal ecomesoutandl ooksatus.He
walkst
owardsuslikehissteppi
ngoneggs.Hehas
themeani
stlookeverthatIseetheboyscasttheir
eyesdownandholdt hei
rhatsti
ghter
.Heopenst he
gat
e.
"Ngenani
."
,hi
scol
dbar
it
onemakest
heboy
sjump
andenter
.
IstandabitandlookatwhereIwillstepinsi
de.
Somet hi
ngpushesmef orwar
dandIwal kin.A
thunderstr
ucksintheyar
dandev eryonejumps.A
blackcobraemitsfr
om wherethethunderhas
struckanditr
aisesit
sheadup.Langapushesme
backwardsbehindhim.
"Myekemfanangekei
menzelutho.
(l
eav
eherboy.I
t
won'tdoanyt
hingt
oher.
)"
,theoldmansay
ssti
ll
seat
ed.
Itstartsrainingwi t
hwindandIshi eldmyey esas
Langast andsnextt ome.Wher edidt hi
sraincome
from?Ihol dont oLangaast hewindal mostblows
meof fmyf eet.Thesnakecomest owardsmeand
I'
m notscar edofsnakesact ual
l
yIl ovethem butif
thisshitbitesmeIam i nthemiddleofnowher eand
I'
llbedeadwi t
hing10mi nut
eswi t
houtant i
venom.It
circl
esi tselfaroundmyl egandIf eeladropofpiss.
Ther ainst opsandt hehotweatheri sbackli
keit
neverrai
ned.Il
ookuptotheskyandt
hesunisout
againli
keitnev
errai
ned.Il
ookdownatt
hesnake
anditsnotther
eandIswearIal
mostfai
nt.
"
Uny
ezi
.
Langai scookt oholdmeandl i
ftsmeup.I '
m so
dizzyrightnow.Awomancomesoutwi thagr ass
matandLangai sinstructedt olaymedownoni t
.
Thistreesshadei ssocool andcal ming.Ihear
voiceswhi speri
ngandIt hinkI'ml osingmymi nd.I
tr
ysi t
tingupbuti t
sl i
keI '
m par alayzed.Theoldman
burnsincenseandci rclesmewhi l
echant i
nghi scl
an
names.Thi sisnothowIt houghtt hingswoul dbe
done.It houghtwe'dsi tdownandI '
dsaymyst or
y
andt hey'dfil
lmeini fIam t heir
sornot .
"Sowubuyi
lendodakazi
.Sesi
zokukhusel
a.(
youback
daughter
.We'l
lprot
ectyou)"
Hepi
ckstwoleav
esf
rom t
het
reeandgr
indst
hem i
n
t
hecal
abash.
"Ngabayenai
zanochef
uweny
oka.
(br
ingt
hesnake
poison.
)"
Snakepoi
son?IseeLangast
epupandNdabenkhul
u
hol
dshim backshakinghi shead.Ilookathi m and
heseesthefearinmyey esandmout hs'Ilovey ou.
'.
TheguynamedNgabay enacomesbackwi thasmal l
bott
leofsnakepoisonandIt hinkI '
l
llose
consci
ousness.Theoldmanmi xesitwi t
ht heleaves
andheshakesi tar
oundt hebur ni
ngi ncense.
Ngabayenaholdsmyheadupast heoldmanmakes
medr i
nkthemi xt
ure.I
ttasteslikedeat h.Istar
t
coughi
ngreall
ybadandwhatseemsl i
keblackbl ood
comesoutofmymout handt heymakemev omi ti
n
abucket.
"Khi
pa.Khi
pakonkeukuncol
akanyoko.
(t
akei
tout
.
Takeoutal
lyoumotherssi
ns.)
".
IgagandIv omi tonelastt
imeandIf eell
ikemy
throatwil
lsnapi nhalf.Ablackballi
fIdon'tknow
whatf al
lsi
nt othebucketandIl aybackagainwith
tearsinmyey es.Ifi
nall
yhavefullcont
rolofmybody
whenIwi pemyt ear
s.Ngabayenasitsnexttome
andr ubshisey es.
"Thul
andodana.Usebhuy
il
e.(don'
tcr
yson.She'
s
back.
)",
theol
dmansay ssit
ti
ngdownagain.
Hisey ebr
owsmeetonhisglabel
l
aleavi
ngnospace.
Theyt hi
ckandbushy
.Iguessthi
siswheremy
eyebrowscomef r
om.Irubonmyt hr
oatasIt
ry
tal
king.
"
Ungakhul
umi
.(
don'
ttal
k.)
"
Everyonecomesoutf rom t
hehouseandst and
aroundt hetr
eesmil
ing.Ihearthewhisper
sagain
andIt ouchthetr
eeasonev oicebecomesloudfrom
them all
.Itsoneofafemale.
"
I'
mtrappedUnyezi
!For
giv
emesoIcanbeonewi
th
myownclanagain.
"
Ir
emov
emyhandsof
astl
i
keIj
ustgotbur
ned.
"
Uny
ezi
?"
Il
ookatNgabay
ena.Whatki
ndofnamei
sthat
?
"
Bay
inil
abaf
ananawe?
(whatar
etheseboy
sto
y
ou?)
"
Boys?Inot
icehowt
heyt
ickt
hej
awsatt
hat
st
atement.
"Langai
smyfiance.Thosear
ehisbrother
s.They
helpedmef
indyou.",
Isaypoi
nti
ngatthem.
"
Ant
izabazel
eizi
hlal
o.(
bri
ngt
hem chai
rs.
)"
Ay ounggi
rlr
unst
othehouseandcomesbackwi
th
chair
s.
"Ni
ngahlal
iphansikomt hunzi
.Anibona
balay
ikhay
a.(
don'tsitundertheshade.Y'
al
lnot
famil
y.)
"
Somymanhast obur ni
nthesunbecauseofa
stupidtr
eeshade?Thesepeopl
earecrazy
.Langa
roll
shiseyesandtheysi
tdown.
"
Wewi l
lhavey
oucl
eansedtonightt
oremov
ethe
f
inal
curseofy
ourmother
ssins."
"
Whatdi
dshedo?
"
"
Toucht
het
reeagai
nandaskher
."
Askher
?Iputmyhandagainonthetr
eeandthe
whi
sper
sstartbef
oreonev
oicebecomescl
ear.
"
Uny
ezi
.Getmeoutofher
e."
"
Mbuzewenzani.I
gamal
akhsuNokuthul
a.(
askher
whatshedi
d.Hernamei
sNokuthul
a.)
"
"
Ma-Nokut
hul
awenzani
(whatdi
dyoudo)
?"
"Ngi
yaxoli
sa.Ngadli
sauGogowakhongobangi f
una
i
skhwamasakhesobuny anga.
(I
'm sor
ry.Ipoi
soned
yourgrandmotherbecauseIwantedherhealer
bag.)
"
What
?Justaheal
erbag?Ihadtosuf
ferf
ort
hat
?I
r
emovethehandf
rom thet
ree.
"Yourgrandmotherwasaheal
er.Chosenonet
o
protectt
hetree.Lookatt
hetr
ee"
Ilookupandtheleav
esaredryandfal
li
ngoffbut
theshadeist
hatofahealt
hytree.Whatt
heactual
fuck?Il
ookatNgabayenaandbackatthetr
eeand
theleav
esaregreenandheal
thyagai
n.
"Thetreeisdy i
ng.I
tcapturesthesoulsofourloved
onesandy ourmotheri
st r
appedi nsi
deaswel l
.She
wasmar r
iedtome.Shewasher etostealt
hegift
from ourclansentbytheKi nginSwazilandsohe
cangiveittohisson."
Thi
sisconf
usi
ng.
"I
tst
artswayback.We' r
eSwat i
.From avi
ll
agei
n
Swazil
andcalledNtabatet
su.We'r
eRoy al
.My
mother.Yourgrandmothersmotherhadthegi
ft
.It
waspassedongener at
iontogener ati
on.Shewas
fooledbyl ov eandmar ri
edsomeonef rom our
enemycl an.Shegav ehimt hethrone.Shef el
l
pregnantandaf terbirthhehadki ll
edhersohecan
rul
eal one.Mymot herhadt hegiftpassedonher .
Shehadaccesst ot hebagwhenshewasofage.Her
fatherwant editforhi mself.Hehadt riedtokil
lher
sosher an.Shemetmyf at
herandhet ookherherin.
Shewasgi v enaseed.Shepl antedithereinthisyar
d.
Thet reegr owingast heoneinSwazi landdied.When
Imety ourmot herIt houghtitwasr eal.Mymot her
hadn'tbeenwar nedabouther .Whenshewas
pregnantwi thyoushef i
nal
lyhadt hegut sto.
..
"
Hepausesabi
tandr
ubshi
sface.
"Qhubekandodana.
(car
ryonson.
)"
,t
heol
dman
urgeshimtoconti
nue.
If
eell
ikeI'
mli
steni
ngtooneofthosef
ict
ional
st
ori
eskidsar
et ol
dbyel
dersar
oundabonf i
re.
"Whenshekil
ledhim andtookthebag.Sher
anaway
whil
estil
lpr
egnantwithyou.Idon'
tknowthest
ory
abouthowyouendedupher ebutwhenwehadfel
t
anot hersoul enterthet r
eewehadl istenedtothe
voiceandi twasy ourmot her.Wecal l
edaseerand
shel etusi nthatmygr andmot herwasangr yandher
furyf ellupony ousi ncey ourmot herhaddi ed.We
hadbeggedhert ol eavey oual onebutshewas
blindedbyanger .Thegi fthadbeenpassedont oyou
andt hef actthatwheny oucameofagey oudidn'
t
takey ourresponsi bil
it
iesanger edherwor se.You
still
hav et ofindt hebagandgett hethronebackt o
usagai n.Ihav etriedev eryt
hingbutwi thoutyouour
clanwi l
ldieandt hethronewi l
l carr
yonbei ngruled
byt hewr ongcl an.SosiboKi ngdom ar erunby
women.I tisanabomi nat i
onf oramant orulethe
kingdom. "
Ij
ustsitt
hereandl
ookatt
hemanwhoi
s
supposedl
ymydad.
"
Thisi
sajokeri
ght?Ijustcameheretobecleansed.
Getmyshi
tinorderandthanmarryLanga.
"
"I
fyoudon'tfi
ndthebagandbet heprotect
oroft
he
tr
ee.OurKingdom wil
lcarr
yondy i
ngandy ou'
l
lbe
dyi
ngwithit.That
'swhybadt hi
ngswil
lfoll
owyou.
Acknowledgeyourgif
t.Therestwi
llf
oll
ow."
Il
ookatLangaandhel ooksli
kehei sabouttost
and
upandchopthetreedown.Sowenotget t
ingour
happi
l
yeveraft
er?Shitisst
il
lgoingtobetoughfor
us?AndI'
m Royal
ty?Mina?Uny ezi
?Thishastobea
j
oke!
"
Leav
eher
.Wewi
l
lcl
eansehert
oni
ght
."
"
Wewon'
tbeabl
etol
eav
eher
."
,Langaspeaksout
.
"You'r
enotmarri
edtoherandnolobolahasbeen
paid.She'
sourdaught
er.Leav
eson."
Langachuckl
esandat
temptstosteali
nsi
det
he
shadewhensomethi
ngpusheshim back.
"
Langa!
"
Ist
andupandatt
endtohi
m.Ili
fthi
sshi
rtupandhe
hasaredhandmarkonhi
schest.
"
Shit
!Ithoughtourfamilywasweir
dwi
thallt
hei
r
t
radi
ti
onalstuffbutthi
s!"
,hesay
sashegrunt
s.
"
Arey
ouokay
?I'
m sosor
ry.
"
"Leav
eson.You'v
eangeredmywi f
e.You'
renot
all
owedunderthetr
eeunti
lyou'
remakeawi f
eofour
daughter
."
Hestandsupandwal
ksawaywi
thhi
sbr
other
s
f
oll
owing.
"
Langa.
",Iwhi
sper
.
Het
urnsar
oundandhenot
icest
het
ear
sinmyey
es.
"
Don'
tl
eav
epl
ease.
"
"
I'
m notl
eavi
ngyou.Wewillbei
nthecar
.I'
l
lhave
y
ourlobol
apaidbyendofsundowntomorr
ow."
Theywalkoutthegat
eandgetint
othecarandthey
parki
tacrossther
oad.Ij
ustst
andther
edefeat
edas
myheadspi ns.
"
Ohmot
herwhatdi
dyougetmei
nto.
",
Iwhi
sper
.
Coul
dn'tshehavefel
lpr
egnanti
ntoal
ess
compli
catedfamil
y?
"
Let
'sgeti
nsi
de.
"
IstandthereandLangalooksatmst hr
oughthe
window.Pleasepaydowr yquick.Ineedyouonthis
crazyjour
neyI'
m abouttotake.Andwhyar en'
tthey
bringi
nginthefoodtheybought ?
I
tsaf
ict
ional
stor
yaf
teral
l
28
UNYEZI
Ikeeponlookingoutthewindowandtheyst
il
l
standi
ngthere.It
hinkit
sbeentwohoursoft
hem
standi
ngatthegateshouti
ngmyclannames.
"
Babangy
akucel
a(dadpl
ease.
)"
Hejustlooksatmeandsi psonhi stea.Myuncles
areseateddri
nki
ngalcohol.I'v
ebeenbeggi nghimt o
l
etthem inbutheai
n'tbudgi ngandmygr andf
ather
i
ssitt
ingunderthet
reepret endingasi fhecan'
teven
hearthem.Igotout
sideandsi tnexttoMkhulu.
"
Mkhul
ungy
akucel
a.(
please.
)"
"
Wewantal
ett
erf
ir
st.
"
Al
ett
er?
"
Howaboutanemai
l
?"
"
Emai
l
?"
"Okaymkhul
u.You'
ll
chargethem ext
raf
ornot
bri
ngingt
hel
etter
.Pl
ease."
Hel
ooksatt
hem andl
ooksatme.
"
Doy
oul
ovehi
m?"
Il
ookathim andnodt
hesmi
l
eonmyf
ace
i
nvol
untar
y.
"AlotMkhul
u.Langamakesmehappyandhe
support
sme."
"
Hasheev
erhi
tyou?
"
"
Notev
enonce.Her
espect
sme.
"
"
Hasheev
ercheat
ed?
"
"
No.
"
"
Doeshehav
eki
ds?
"
"
Yes.Thr
ee.
"
"
Thr
ee?
!"
"Yeah.Twoar
enothisbutwet
aket
hem ast
heyour
own.OneImiscar
ri
ed."
Il
ookdownandhesi
ghs.
"Mywifewrongedyoumtanam.Shel
etangerbl
ind
hershefor
gotthatyouwer
eoneofourown.Just
l
ost.
"
"
Langahasbeenwi
thmeev
eryst
epoft
heway
."
"Y'
all
lov
eremi
ndsmeofmi
neandNomv
ulasl
ove.
Pure.
"
"
Youl
ovedherdi
dn'
tyou?
"
Hesmi
l
esandput
sahandont
het
ree.
"
Ist
il
ldo.
"
Hel
ooksatLangaasheget
soutoft
hecarandt
alks
t
ohi
suncle.
"Doesthatboyknowt haty
oucan'ttakehissurname?
Youwi ll
beaQueen?Thaty ouwill
beaheal er?Wi l
l
hewithstanddayswhenhewi l
lwakeupwi t
hy ou
fi
ghti
ngi nyourdr
eams?Youwi l
lbemor epower ful
andricher.Youwi
llknowpart
sofhi m ev
enhe
doesn'tknow.Wil
lhebecomf or
tablewit
ht hat?"
"Idon'
tknowMkhul
ubuti
fhel
ovesmeenoughhe'
l
l
bebymysi de.
"
Helooksatmeandnodsbeforest
andi
ngupand
headi
nginsi
dethehouse.Mydadcomesoutwi
th
myauntLugenganibehi
ndhi
m.
"
Uny
ezi
.Ngenaendl
i
ni(
geti
nsi
de)
."
Ifoll
owbehindmyauntaswewal ktot her ondavel
andmycousi nsfoll
owbehindus.Ilookout si
dethe
windowasDadt al
kstothemenatt hegat eandt hey
gi
v ehim abott
leofwhiskeyandmoney .Het akesit
i
nsideandmyuncl ecomesoutandl et
'sthem i n.
Thanky ouMkhulu!IwishIcanhearwhat 'sgoingon
butwear enotinthemainhouse.Isitont opoft he
bedandt akeoutmyphoneandcal lLanga.
"
Mkami
."
"
Sthandwa.
"
"
Yourf
ami
l
yisbr
utal
."
"
Ithi
nkbei
nghear
tl
essi
saf
ami
l
ythi
ng.
"
"
ThankGodIgott
heangel
."
Ismi
l
e.I
fonl
yyouknew.
"
Imi
ssy
ou.
"
"Idotooandmybodyhur
tsf
rom sl
eepi
ngi
nthe
car.
"
"
Sor
ry.Hav
ey'
al
leat
en?
"
"
Weat
esomeoft
hebr
eadandpol
onywebought
y
est
erday
."
"
Ahkodwa.
"
"Pl
usIalmostdi
edy
est
erday
.Justbecauseof
shade?
!"
"
Uyaphaphanawe(
you'
real
sof
orwar
d.)
"
"
Mxai
.Ist
il
lhav
echestpai
nsnamanj
e."
"
DramaLanga.Hav
etheboy
scal
l
ed?
"
"
Yeah.Theyar
ri
vedsaf
e."
"
Ithoughtwewer
eget
ti
ngourhappyendi
ng.
"
"Wearebutnotnow.Ican'
tbel
iev
eyou'
reroyal
ty.I
haveamill
i
onreadyforyourl
obolai
ncasethey
char
gemef orthatt
oo.
"
"
Ami
l
li
on?
"
"
Iwant
edtopayi
ndiamondsbuyNdabenkhul
usai
d
I
'
m bei
ngdramat
ic.
"
"Velehawu!
",Ndabenkhul
usv
oicesay
sont
heot
her
side.
"
Hewasr
ight
.Di
amonds?You'
recr
azy
!",
Isay
l
aughi
ng.
"
I'
m ser
ious.Wai
t.Myuncl
ewant
stot
alkt
ome.
"
"
Okay
."
Idr
opthecal
landwesitt
her
eandI'm bi
ti
ngmy
nai
l
s.Ihopet
heydon'
twantl
ivecows.

LANGALAKHE
Myuncl
ewal
ksupt
ousi
nthecar
.
"
Hehndodana.Kunzi
ma.
(son.I
tshar
d.)
"
"
What
'swr
ong?
"
"Bay
abuzaukut
hiumthol
eeseyit
chi
tchi
yinj
?(t
hey
aski
ngify
oufoundheravir
gin?
)"
Inodandmybr
other
slookatme.
"Theyal
sochar
gingusR2000f
ornorwr
it
ingal
ett
er
aler
ti
ngthem.
"
"
Payt
hem.Mal
ume.Gi
vet
hem what
evert
heywant
."
Henodsandwalksbacki
nsi
de.Mybr
other
slookat
mewithf
oldedarms.
"
What
?"
"
Avi
rgi
n?"
"Nobutt
heydon'
thav
etochar
gemel
esscauseof
pussy
."
"Ihopetheywantl
i
vecowsandt
alki
nggoat
s."
,
Bhekikhayasay
s.
"
Nxai
voet
sekwena!
"
Hel
aughsandl
i
ght
saci
gar
ett
e.
"Umakoti
ngowethu!Siy
avuma!Ozosiwashel
a
asi
phekel
e!(
thewifei
sours!She'l
ldoourl
aundr
y
andcookforus.
)"
,Bheki
khayasings.
"
Cookf
orwenanabobani
?(y
ouandwho?
)"
"
Siy
aji
vasi
yumdeni
!(
wedanci
ngwef
ami
l
y)"
,hesi
ngs.
"
Thul
amahnBheki
.(
keepqui
etman.
)"
Hel
ooksatmeandl
aughs.
"
Mal
umei
scomi
ngoutagai
n."
Wewai
tformyuncl
eti
l
lher
eachesus.
"
Theyar
echar
gingy
ouR50000f
ort
hechi
l
dshel
ost
.
R10000yevul
amlomo.R60000forherl
obol
a.In
tot
ali
tsR120000andwe'
renegot
iat
ingf
oratleast
R100000.
"
"No.Don'
tnegoti
ate.NoKhuzway
owi
fei
swor
th
R100000!She'sroyal
tyr
ight
?"
"
Yes.
"
"
Good.Tel
lthem y
ou'
l
lpayR50000ext
raf
ort
he
f
utur
eQueen."
"
Mshana.
"
"
Payi
tMal
ume.
"
Henodsandgetbacki
nsi
de.
"
R220000?Udaki
wewena!
(youdr
unk!
)"
"Waitt
il
lyoumeety
ourchosenoneNdabenkhul
u.I
'
ll
accompanyyoutot
hebank."
Helooksatmeandshr ugs.Iseet
hreegi
rl
sexita
r
ondavelandIcan'
ttell
Unyeziist
heoneinthe
middl
e.Itextmyuncle.
"
Theonewr
appedi
nar
edbl
anket
."
Iputmyphonebacki
nmypocket
.Idon'
tknowhow
manycigarett
esI'
vesmoked.Wehearul
ulat
ionsand
Ismil
e.She'smine.Mybr
other
swhist
leandwest ar
t
danci
ng.
"
Wadl
aKhuzway
o!"
Welaughandhugeachot
her
.Wesi
tint
hecarandI
cal
lher
.
"
Myeni
wami
."
,hersof
tvoi
cecomest
hrough.
"Mkami
."
,Isaywhi
l
egr
inni
ng.
"
Whi
pped.
",
Bheki
khay
acoughsout
.
"
Ever
ythi
ngwentwel
l
.Howmuchdi
ditcost
?"
"
That
sformeandmyunclest
oknowandy
our
f
amil
ytonev
ertel
lyou.
"
"
Myauntsaregoi
ngonaboutav
irgi
nit
ypr
ice.What
's
t
hatabout
?"
"
Idon'
tknowshame.
"
"
Okay
.We'
redi
shi
ngupf
ory
'al
lnow.Il
ovey
ou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Idr
opt
hecal
lsmi
l
ing.Ndabenkhul
uget
sinsi
det
he
car
.
"
Dadsay
shei
spr
oudofy
ou.
"
"
Itf
eel
sli
keadr
eam.
"
"
Whati
fiti
s",
Bheki
khay
asay
s.
Iforgothowdumbt hi
sonecanbe.Hi m and
Khulekaniarei
diots.Wenot i
ceagirl
call
ingforus
andwegetoutoft hecarandwal ki
nside.She
dir
ectsusintoar ondavelandwesitthere.They
comewi thfoodandser veus.Ihavetodr i
vehome
todayandI '
l
lonl
yseeUny eziwhensheget sa
chancet ogototown.
"Whocooked?
",
Bheki
khay
aasksandNdabenkhul
u
ki
ckshi
m.
"
AuntUny
ezi
."
Ismi
l
eandt
aket
hepl
ateandwedi
gin.
"
WhenyouandUnyezi
areKi
ngAndQueencanI
mov
einwit
hy'al
l
?"
Il
ookatBheki
khay
aandr
aisemyf
ucky
ouf
ingerat
hi
m.
"
Uyi
bhar
iwena!
(youani
diot
.)
"
Helaughsandeat shisfood.Ismi
leasIheart
he
ulul
ati
onsintheyard.She'sal
waysbeenminebuti
t
feel
sdiff
erentnow.
29
UNYEZI
Every
onei sasl
eepnowandi t
sl at
e.Iwalkoutas
soonasLangat ext
smet hathisoutsi
de.Iam
sneakingoutli
kea15yearold.WhenIam aboutt o
nearthefencemyauntcomesoutoft hetoi
l
et.Shi
t!
"
Uny
ezi
?",
shewhi
sper
s.
"
Aunt
y."
"
Uyaphi
?(wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
)"
"
Etoi
l
et?
(tot
het
oil
et?
)"
"
Wabuzamina?Uy
aphi
?(y
ouaski
ngme?Wher
ear
e
y
ougoi
ng?
)"
"
Angi
yindawo.
(I
'm notgoi
ngany
wher
e.)
"
"
Ungangenzi
isl
imawengane.Ngizobizauy
ihl
o.(
don'
t
makemeani di
ot.I
'
llcal
lyourf
ather
.)
"
"
EishAunt
y."
"
Akusi
yi
motoryamkhony
anel
eya?
(isn'
tthatourson
i
nlawscar
?)"
Il
ookdownandshel
aughsl
owl
y.
"Hamba.Ubuy
ebef or
ekuphumai
l
anga.
(go.Come
backbefor
esunr
ise.)
"
Ismil
eandhugherbef oreshewalksinsidethe
house.InearthefenceasLangaget soutoft hecar
.
Ihavetojumpsi nceIcan'topent
hegat ecause
Mkhuluwillhearit
.I'
m sureIcansti
l
l j
umpf ences.I
walkbackwardsabi t
.
"
Unyezi
wenzanu?
(whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
)",
Langa
whi
sper
s.
Ii
gnorehi
m andstartrunningandIstepont
hesmal
l
st
eepofsandbeforejumpi ngovermissi
ngast
epi
n
mylandi
ngandroll
ingont othefl
oor.
"
Shi
t!Uny
ezi
."
Langahelpsmeupandheget sthedustoffmy
dress.I
tssodarkouthere.Hewal ksmetowardst
he
carandhelpsmein.IthinkItwi
stedsomethi
ng.My
foothurt
s.Hestar
tslaughingassoonasheget si
n
thecarandIjoi
nhim.
"
Whatwer
eyout
hinki
ng?
",
hesay
slaughi
ng.
"Iusedtodot
hatwhenj
wasaki
dbutt
hatwasan
epicfai
l
."
Hel
aughshar
derandIpi
nchhi
m.
"
Ouch!Tr
uecolour
sav
ail
your
sel
f.Ial
way
sknewy
ou
wer
eabusiv
e."
Ir
oll
myey
esandhel
aughs.
"
Youal
mostbr
okeal
egj
umpi
ngf
encesf
ordi
ck.
"
Il
aughandhejoinsme.Il
aughasIdoubl
eov
erandI
not
icehi
sstar
ing.
"
What
?"
"
You'
rebeaut
if
ul.
"
Ismi
l
eandl
ookdownasIf
eel
mycheeksgethot
.
"
Lookatme.
"
Il
if
tmyey esandmeethi s.Themoonandocean.
Themooni sstr
awberryandt heoceancalm.I
missedthis.Imissedhim.Iknowi t
'sbeentwodays
wit
houtsleepingnexttohim butI'
mj ustsousedt
oit.
"
Youkno-
"
Icuthim offwi
thakissandherepl
iesandImoanat
thefeelofhisl
ipsonmine.Wepull
outandheput s
hisforeheadonmineandwestareateachother
s
eyes.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Jet
'ai
me.
"
"
Huh?
"
"
WaahUny
ezi
."
"
Hay
iisi
Frenchesani
?(what
'st
heFr
enchf
or?
)"
"I
'
mt ry
ingt
ober
omant
icher
e.Yousuchahood
gi
rl.
"
"
HahLanga!
"
Hel
aughsandki
ssesme.
"
Ufunangi
thi
ni?Ngiy
akuvat
ela?
(whatdoy
ouwant
metosay?Il
ov ey
ou? )
"
"
Ngi
cwel
engawe.
(Il
ovey
ou)
"
Hel
aughsatme.
"
Whatdoy
ouknowaboutkasi
taal
?"
"Ngi
cavaezi
bai
eNjay
am.Ngikhul
engibl
ome
emakoneni
.(
Iknowalotmydawg.Igr
ewupchi
l
li
ng
bythecor
ner.
)"
"Sov el
euy
ayi
pushai
nombol
o?(
soy
ouspeakkasi
slang?)
"
"Ngi
yawuphakamisausevenamathekeninamaji
ta
sebayazi
ukuthi
uguluvasekaf
iki
l
e.(Icausehavoc.
Gir
lsandboysknowt hatt
heO.Ghasar ri
ved.
)"
"
Sal
ut'
!
"(sal
ute)
"
Sal
ut'
lov
a.(
sakut
egangst
er.
)"
Hesmi
l
esandwebumpf
ist
s.
"
Ial
waysknewyouhadabitofgangst
eri
nyousi
nce
y
oucutmycousi
nswife'
scheek.
"
"
Me?Cutwho'
scheek?
"
Il
ookawayandhemakesmel
ookathi
m.
"YouknowexactlywhatI'
mt al
kingabout
.Siyandais
walki
ngaroundwi t
hascaronhercheekandshe
saysherchi
ldscratchedbutIknowaknifecut.Ial
so
knewitwasy ou.
"
"
Itwasn'
tmeshame.
"
"
You'
resur
e?"
"
Iswear
."
Henar
rowshi
sey
esatmeandIl
ookar
oundt
hecar
.
"
Ify
ousayso.
"
Ismi
l
eathi
m andst
artl
aughi
ng.
"
Don'
ttel
lmey
ou'
vel
osty
ourmi
ndnow.
"
"
Mxm.Iguessshel
i
stenedt
omeaf
teral
l
.
"
Iknewi
t.Uny
ezi
."
"
What
?"
"
Ican'
tmar
ryy
ouany
mor
e.You'
redanger
ous.
"
"Don'
tevent
hinkaboutl
eav
ingme.I
'
llboi
lyour
ball
s."
"
Ah.Yousee?Iwantmymoneyback.
"
"
Khet
hil
ekhet
hil
e."(
You'
vechosen.
)
Hesmi
l
esandki
ssesme.
"
Ichosewel
l
."
Ismi
l
eandent
erwi
neourhands.
"
Youhav
ereal
l
yugl
yfi
nger
sLanga.
"
"
Youdon'
tcompl
ainwhent
heyi
nsi
dey
ou.
"
Il
ookathi
m wi
thmymout
hopen.Langa!
"
Closeyourmout
hbef
oreIst
ickmydi
cki
nsi
dey
our
mouth.
"
Ilaughandhejoi
nsme.Mystomachhur
tswi
thal
l
thelaughi
ngI
'v
ebeendoing.
"
Yousonast
y."
"
Youl
i
kei
t.
"
"
Idon'
t.I
'
m soi
nnocentandy
ou'
ver
uinedal
lthat
."
Hel
ooksatmeandl
aughs.
"
Wena?I
nnocent
?(You?
)"
Hel
aughsandIf
oldmyar
ms.
"
AhLanga!AhDeeperLanga!Fast
er!Yes!Yes!
Aaaah!
",hescr
eamsi
mitati
ngme.
"
Idon'
tsoundl
i
ket
hat
."
"
Ohy
esLanga!Godeeperpast
ordaddy
!"
"
Langauy
abona?
(yousee!
)"
Hecarriesonimi
tati
ngme.Ij
umpcareful
lyt
othe
backseatwit
houthurt
ingmyal
readyi
njur
edfoot
.He
l
ooksatme.
"
Okay
.I'
m sor
ry.
",
hesay
sst
il
ll
aughi
ng.
Hej
umpsnextt
ome.
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
"
Mxm.
"
"
Look.
"
Il
ookathim andhesmi
l
escausi
ngmet
osmi
l
etoo.
I'
m soweakthou.
"
Thatwast
ooeasy
!"
"
Whatwoul
dyouhav
epr
efer
red?
"
Hesmi
l
esandi
nchescl
osert
omyf
ace.
"
Woul
dyouhav
epr
efer
redi
fIl
aidy
oudown?
"
Hemov
eshi
sfaceawayasI
'
minchi
ngcl
oser
.
"
IfIki
ssedy
ouhungr
il
y?"
Hespeaksnextt
omyearhi
sbr
eat
hebounci
ngof
f
myski
ncausi
ngmet
oshi
ver
.
"
IfIsneakedmyhandinsi
deyourdr
essandr
ubbed
y
ourclitt
hroughy
ourpanti
es?
"
Heki
ssesmyneckandli
cksi
tbefor
ebl
owi
ngcol
d
ai
roni
tcausi
ngmybreathet
ohit
ch.
"
Andt henI
'
dt akethem of
f.I
'dgeti
nbetweeny
our
t
highsandinsertmysel
finsi
deyouslowl
y."
Icl
enchmyt
highsandhenot
icesandhemov
es
away.
"
Ist
hathowy
ou'
dpr
eferi
t?"
Il
ookathi
m withmybreathequi
ckeni
ngasIst
art
i
magini
nghim doi
ngal
lthattome.
"
Orwoul
dyoupr
eferIdoi
tli
ket
his?
"
Heki ssesmewi thhungerandIrepl
ywi t
hasmuch
hunger .Helay
smedowngent ly
.Thankgoodnesshe
camewi thanSUVsoi tsmorecomfortabl
e.His
handst artgoi
ngdownunt il
hegetsitundermy
dress.Wher ehishandhastouchedfeelshotandhe
remov esmypant yslowly
.Herubshisthumbonmy
cli
tandImoan.
"
Youl
i
ket
hat
?"
Idon'
tanswerandhest
ops.
"
Iaskedy
ouaquest
ion.
"
Inodf
ast"
Ido.
"
Hecar
ri
esonandput
shi
sindexf
ingeri
nandmoan.
"
Howdoest
hatmakey
ouf
eel
?"
"
Good.
",Imoanout
.
Hei
nser
tshi
smiddl
efi
ngerandcur
lst
hem insi
deof
mewhil
ehi
sthumbispl
ayi
ngwithmycli
t.
"
Howaboutt
hat
?"
"
Itf
eel
s..
.Itf
eel
s-Fuck!
"
Hepumpst
hem i
nsi
deofmeandhi
sst
il
lrubbi
ngon
mycli
t.
"
AnswermeorIst
op.
"
"
Itf
eel
s..
.Goo.
..Good!
"
Heupshi
spaceImoanabi
tlouder
.
"
Fuck!Ahy
es!
",
ImoanoutasIcum al
lov
erhi
s
f
inger
s.
Hetakest
hem outandl
icksthem whi
lel
ooki
ngme
i
ntheeyesandmakesthat"mcah"soundandIl
augh.
"
You'
resonast
y."
"
Yout
ast
egood.
"
Heki
ssesmeandli
ft
smet
osi
tont
opofhi
m.The
hoei
nmescreams.
"
Don'
tgett
ooexci
ted.
"
"
Okay
."
Hel
owershispantsandKhuzway
ospr
ingsoutandI
smi
l
eli
ckingmylips.
"
Stopl
ooki
ngati
tli
keaki
dwhoj
ustr
ecei
vedcandy
."
"
Ican'
thel
pit
."
"
You'
rewei
rd.
"
"
Andy
oul
ovei
t.
"
Heput shi
slowerlipbetweenhi
steet
handhi s
di
mpl esshow.Doeshehav etobethi
ssexy?He
helpsmeinserthimselfi
nme.Iputonehandont he
windowasIf eelhi
mi nme.Iputmyotherhandon
hi
st hi
ghbalanci
ngmy self
.Ist
artmovi
ngslowlyand
hegripsmywaist.Hi
seyesarecl
osedwit
hhislower
l
ipbetweenhisteet
handheislooki
ngup.Imoanas
hestart
srubbi
ngonmycl i
t.
"
MmmmhLanga.
"
Hetakesoutmyboobf rom mydressandstarts
sucki
ngmynipple.Iputmyhandonhi sshoul
der
andstar
tmov i
ngmywai standhelayshisheadon
myshoulder
.Hisgroansturnmeonev enmor eandI
upmypace.
"
FuckUny
ezi
!"
HespanksmyassandIupmypace.Il aymyhands
onhischest.Icl
enchmywall
saroundhim asIcum
andIfeelhi
swar mthasheshoot
shisspermsinsi
de
ofme.
"
Fuck!
"
Hegri
psmybut
tcheekst
ight
erasheshoot
sthel
ast
ofhi
m.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
Hel
i
ftsmeupandt
akeshi
msel
foutcausi
nghi
s
sper
mt odri
pout.Het
akesatowel
andwipesme.
Hepull
shispant
supandIlayonhi
schest
.
"
Ihav
esomet
hingf
ory
ou.
"
Her
eachesf
orhi
spocket
.
"
Giv
emey
ourhand.
"
Isi
tupstraightandhetakesmylefthand.Heopens
upasmall boxandar i
ngshinesunderthemoon.It
s
beaut
if
ul.
"
It
sal
ateengagementr
ing.
"
"
Ilov
eit
."
Heputsi
tsonandIl
ookati
tsmi
l
ingwi
tht
ear
sin
myeyes.
"
It
sbeaut
if
ul.I
tlooksexpensi
ve.
"
"
NomatterhowmuchmoneyIwastei
tcannev
er
mat
chyourworth.I
fIwasaKl
ept
omaniacI
'
dsteal
t
hemoonf ory
ou."
"
LunarKl
ept
o.Themoonst
eal
er.
"
"
Themoonst
eal
er.
"
IlayonhischestandIl
ookatthemoonout sidet
he
window.It
sbeautif
ulasal
ways.Ismil
elookingat
thediamondringonmyf i
nger
.Sphi
woMommy
l
ov esDaddy.We'r
egett
ingmarri
ed.

KUHLEKONKESI
LANGWE
Igetont hest
ageandIci r
clear oundthepole.Il i
ft
my selfupont hepol easmymi nderaseseveryone
aroundme.Ist artmov ingupt hepoleandIsl i
de
downandl andwi thast retchandt hecr owdscr eams
throwingmoney .Icarryondanci ngforanhour .I
collectthemoneyont hest ageandIwal kofft
he
stageassoonasPr incesswal ksin.Igetint
othe
changi ngroom count i
ngmymoneyandImadequi t
e
abuck.Ichangei ntomyshor tunifor
m andget
behi ndthebar.
"
Twof
ingerv
odka.4i
cecubes.
"
Ipourhi
m hi
sdr
inkandputi
tinf
rontofhi
m.
"Youl
ookedreal
l
ygreatont
hatpol
e.I
'
llgi
vey
oy
R2000foroneni
ght
."
"
I'
m ast
ri
pper
.Notapr
ost
it
ute.
"
Imoveontot
henextcust
omer.I
tsabitbusyont
he
pol
esidesoI
'
m nott
oobusythi
sside.Twoguyscal
l
meover.
"
Doubl
escot
ch.Noi
ce.
"
"
Same.
"
Inodandpourt
hem t
hei
rdr
inks.
"
What
'sapr
ett
ygi
rll
i
key
oudoi
ngher
e?"
"Thi
sisnotamov ie.Iwon'
tfall
inl
ovewit
hy ouand
you'
llbemyknightinshini
ngarmour.Weli
vehappi
ly
everaft
er.I
'
m notCinderel
la.
"
Imovet oothercust
omer
sandser
vet
hem t
hei
r
dr
inks.Theycallmeagai
n.
"
Ref
il
l.
"
Ipourthem thei
rrefi
l
lsandt heotherguyislooking
atthepolesecti
on.Het ur
nsar oundandourey es
meetwhenhet akeshisdri
nk.Hisey eshavestarsin
them.Ialmostdropthebot tl
esoIputi tonthe
counter
.Ican'tmovemyey esawayf rom hi
s.Ilook
attheotherguyandhi seyesarenormal .It
urntothe
al
i
enagai
nandt
hest
arsar
est
il
lther
e.I
'
mlosi
ngmy
mind.
"
Arey
ouokay
?"
Ijumpatthesoundofhi
svoi
ce.I
tssodeepand
refr
eshi
ng.I
'mlosi
ngit
.
"
Yeah.
..Yeah.
"
Hesmi l
esanddimpl esshowont hesideofhisface
andIkeepsteadywit hmyhandont hecounteras
mykneesgetweak.Hemustbeanal i
en.Hehas
star
sinhiseyes.Ihurrytothenextcustomer
.Iserve
peopleavoi
dingthealiendudeseyes.
"
Ref
il
l.
"
Ir
efi
l
lthei
rgl
asses.
"
Yougoodont
hepol
e."
"
Thanky
ou.
"
"
Bheki
khay
aKhuzway
o."
"
Kuhl
ekonkeSi
l
angwe.
"
"
Thi
sismyst
upi
dbr
otherKhul
ekani
."
"
Nicet
omeety
'al
l
."
"
Sameher
e."
Iserv
epeopl
ewhenKhul
ekani
asksf
oragl
assof
water.
"Youhavebeaut
if
uley
es.
",
Isayr
andoml
yand
Bheki
khayasmil
es.
"
Thanky
ou.I
tsj
ustr
egul
arbr
owney
est
hou.
"
"
No.Youhav
ethesest
arsi
nthem.They
'r
ebeaut
if
ul.
"
Helooksatmeandthanhi
sbr
other
.Theygi
veeach
ot
herknowingl
ooks.
"
Thanky
ouKuhl
e."
IsmileasImov ear oundthecount er.Myf eetar e
kil
li
ngmeandIhav e30mi nuteslef tti
llknockof f
ti
me.Thet woKhuzway obr ot
hersseent obehav ing
aseriousconversationandIbety oui t
saboutmeby
thewayt heykeeplookingatme.Ishr ugi tof fand
handov ermydut i
est oNatasha.Iheadt ot he
changingroom andgetoutoft heseheel sand
clot
hes.Iwearmyj eanandov ersizedhoodi e.Iwear
myal lst
arsandgr abmymoneyImadet oni ght.I
wal
koutandIwai
tformyuberout
side.
"
Kuhl
e!"
It
urnar
oundandI
'
m metbyst
arsagai
n.
"
Hey
.Uhm.Iwasaboutt
odr
ivehome.Wantal
i
ft?
"
"
No.I
'
mfi
ne.
"
"
Comeon.
"
"
Whati
fyou'
reamur
der
er?
"
Hewal
ksandl
aughs.
"
I'
ll
mur
dery
ouaswego.
"
Ilaughandfoll
owhim.Icheckmypocketandmy
pocketknif
eisther
e.HeopensthedoorformeandI
getinabsorbi
ngthewarmthofthecarand
comf or
tabl
enessoftheseat
s.Hegetsinandst
art
s
theenginethecarr
oari
ngasitcomestolif
e.
"
Wher
edoy
oust
ay?
"
"
Eml
azi
."
Henodsandst
art
sdr
ivi
ng.
"
Wher
e'sy
ourbr
other
?"
"
Hesai
dhewasst
ayi
ngbehi
nd.Hedi
dn'
tcomewi
th
meany
way.
"
Inodandl
ookoutt
hewi
ndowl
ooki
ngatt
hest
ars.
"
You'
rebeaut
if
ul.
"
"
Thanks.
",Ismi
l
eatt
hecompl
i
ment
.
"
CanIseey
ouagai
n?"
"
Uhm.
..
"
"
Please.Youseem l
i
keani
ceper
son.
"
"
OhbutI
'
m al
way
swor
king.
"
"
Wheneveryou'
ref
ree.Cal
lme.Puty
ournumberon
myphone.
"
Itaket
hephoneandopeni
t.Hedoesn'
thav
ea
password.Isav
emynumbersandputhi
sphone
downagain.
"
Thanky
ou.
"
"
Forwhat
?"
"
Yournumber
s."
"
It
sokay
."
Wesitinsi
l
enceti
ll
wedr i
veineMlaziandIst
art
di
rect
inghi
m.HereIam beingdri
venhomebya
st
rangerwi
thst
arsforey
es.Itsbeenaweirdday
.
30
KUHLEKONKE
Ihadwokenupt opr
eparemyli
ttl
esi sterforschool
andIgotbackt obedwhenshewasgone.Iwor k
ni
ghtshiftst
hisweeksoIgettosleept hewhol eday
ti
ll
Ihavet owakeupandgot owork.Ispi l
l thedir
ty
waterIwasbirthi
ngwit
handgotdr essed.Iam
goingbacktobedsinceIhavenothingt odo.My
phoneringsasIgetundert
heblanket s.It
san
unknownnumbersoIanswerandkeepqui et.
"
Kuhl
ekonke?
"
Idon'
trecogni
set
hev
oice.
"
Ufunwaubani
?(who'
slooki
ngf
orher
?)"
"
Bheki
khay
aKhuzway
ofr
om l
astni
ght
."
"
Ohy
ou.
"
"
Yesme.CanIseey
ou?
"
Ithoughtt
hisguywouldfor
getaboutmeandwe'
d
bothmov eonwithourl
iv
es.
"
Ican'
t.I
'
m si
ck.
",
Idon'
tev
ent
ryt
omaket
hesound
conv
inci
ng.
"
Unamanga.I
'
m out
side.
(you'
rel
yi
ng)
"
Isi
tupst
rai
ght
.
"
What
?"
"
Ngi
ngaphandl
e.(
I'
m out
side.
)"
"
Ican'
tgoout
.I'
m si
ck.
",
Isayf
aki
ngacough.
"
Okay
.I'
m comi
ngi
n."
What?!Isthisguycrazy?!Youdon'tjustforce
your
selfintosomeone'slif
e.Ishouldn'tevenhav
e
showedhi m whereIli
ved!
"
No!Youcan'
t-
"
Hedr opsthecallandIqui ckl
ygetoutofbed
checkinghowIl ookinthemi rr
orandf i
xi
ngmyhai r.
Whyam Iev enworri
edabouthowIl ook?ImeanI
dontev enl
ikethisguy.IhearthedooropenandI
j
umpbacki ntobed.Didhej ustbargein?!OhGod!
Whathav eIgottenmy selfint
o?!Istar
tcoughingand
sneezing.
"
Kuhl
e!"
Hisapsy chopath!Whatifhi
sanalienandhewant s
toeatmybr ain?IfIpr
etendI'
m si
ckI'm sur
ehe
won'tsuckmybr ai
n.HewalksinasIcoughr eal
l
y
hardandIwi nceatthepaininmychest .
"
Thatsoundsr
eal
l
ybad.
"
"
Youcan'
tbar
gei
ntosomeone'
shousel
i
ket
his!
"
"
I'
m sor
rybuty
oul
yi
ngandt
ryi
ngt
ogetr
idofme.
"
Irol
lmyey esashesit
sont hebedandsmi l
esl
ike
anidi
ot.Thishast
obet hemostweirdestposit
ion
I'
vebeenin.Whatdoesthi
sguywantf rom me?I '
m
j
usttry
ingtogetmylit
tl
esisterandIthroughschool
.
"
Cutt
heact
."
Istopcoughingandhel ooksatme.Thestars
shi
ningbrightert
odaythantheywereyest
erday.I
sti
l
l t
hinkhisanalien.
"
Youneedt
oleav
e."
Hi
ssmi
l
efadesandhef
urr
owshi
sbr
ows.
"
I'
mjustt
ryi
ngt
ogett
oknowy
ou.
"
"
Ther
e'snot
hingt
oknow.Iappr
eci
atet
hel
i
ftl
ast
ni
ghtbutpl
easel
eav
e."
Hest
andsupandheput
shishandsinhispocket
s.
Hel
ooksdownatmeandInoti
cehisjawti
ck.
"
Kuhl
ekonke.Iam notgoi
ngtobegy
ou.Youhav
e
mynumbers.Wheny oufi
nal
l
ystopt
hinki
ngy
ourcl
i
t
i
smadeofgol dyouhavemynumbers.
"
Hewal ksoutwit
hhi
snosefl
aredandbangsthe
door.Didhejust
?Nohedi
dn'
t!Noway!Ilaughand
fol
l
owhi m.
"
Bheki
khay
ari
ght
?"
Hest
opsopeni
ngt
hegat
eandt
urnsar
oundsl
owl
y.
"Li
stent ome.Verycarefull
y.Youdon'tcomei ntomy
houseuni nvi
tedandinsultme.I'l
lst
aby ourfucken
eyeout .I
fyoutryi
ngtogetaf r
eefucksor r
yImaybe
astripperbutI'
m noprostit
ute.Whodoy oueven
thi
nky ouare?"
Helooksatmeandchuckl
esbuthi
snotamusedat
al
l
.
"I
fyouweremygi
rlI
'
df ucksomerespecti
ntoy
ou.I
f
Iwantedt
ofucky
outrustmey ou'
dbeunderme
r
ightnowmoani
ng.
"
IcrossmyarmsundermyboobsandInot
icehi
s
eyesgother
e.Somuchfor"
ifIwant
edtofucky
ou.
..
"
"Nowl ookKuhl ekonkeI'
m ani
ceguy .Idon'
tknow
yourreasonsofbei ngsoclosedoffbutthat
shouldn'tbeanexcuset oberude.I'
m nottr
yingt
o
getintoy ourpants.Yet
."
Heopenst hegat eandst epoutclosi ngi
tbehindhim
andIwat chhim getintohiscaranddr i
vesoff.I
'
ve
nev erbeensospeechl essi
nmyl i
f e.Istandagainst
thewal lsti
llshocked.Igetbackinsi deandsitonthe
bed.May beIwasabi trudeandIletacut eguywal k
out.Butf uckhissex yass.Therear eotherhotguys.
Ivideocal lNoxoloandsheanswer s.Thisone
alway slooksbeaut i
ful.
"
Sthandwa.
"
Ismi
l
eandInot
iceshe'
sdr
inki
ngwi
ne.
"
Alcohol
i
ctendenci
es.OnaMonday
?!"
"
I'
mt hir
sty
!Inmorewayst
hanone.
",shesay
s
l
aughingandIjoi
nher
.
"
Whathappenedt
oVusi
?"
"Hi
smarri
edmgani!Hiswifecal
l
edmeswear i
ngat
me.Youknowmeanddr amadon' tgetal
ong.I
apol
ogi
zedandcuttheniggaoff
."
"
Whyam Ionl
yhear
ingaboutt
hisnow?
"
"
I'
vebeenbusywi
thwor
k."
"
How'
sthatgoi
ng?MsBaker
yOwner
."
"
Great
.Iam get
tingalotofor
der
sfr
om housewi
ves
f
orever
yeventtheythrow.
"
"
Thati
sgr
eatbabe.
"
"
Thatof
ferst
il
lst
andsKonke.
"
"IknowbutIappl
i
edonl
i
net
ovar
iousl
awf
ir
msandI
havehope.
"
"
You'
l
lfi
nal
l
ygetoutoft
hatcl
ub.
"
"
Don'
tj
udge.
"
"YouknowI'
m not
.You'
rewaytoosmar
ttobeata
str
ipcl
ub.Iwantt
oseeyouincour
t.
"
"
Ijustwi
shIgetonel
awf
ir
mtot
akeme.
"
"
YoushouldsendyourCVtoKhuzwayoLawAnd
Order
.They
'r
eabiglawfi
rm.You'dmakesome
moneyther
e."
"NoNox.Idon'
twanttogetaheadofmy sel
f.The
l
ikesofKhuzwayol
awy er
sdon'tevenupincourt
.
Everyonei
sscar
efofgoingagainstt
hem.I'
m not
thatgood.
"
"
Whydoy
out
akey
our
sel
fforapoes?
"(Pussy
)
"
Ijustknowmyl
i
mitandi
tswaybel
owKhuzway
o's
l
awf i
rm."
Shef
acepal
msher
sel
fandgul
pshergl
assofwi
ne.
"I
'm comingoverwit
hwine.Wegoi ngtodri
nk.Get
drunk.Call
insickf
oryourshif
t.SendyourCVto
Khuzway oLawAndOr derandwe' l
lwakeup
tomorrowwi t
hahangov erawai
tingarepl
y.
"
"
Ineedsomewi
ne.Br
ingt
wobot
tl
es.
"
"
What
'swr
ong?
"
"
Itur
neddownav
eryhothunkt
oday
."
Shescr
eamsatme.
"
What
?!I
'
m comi
ngt
her
e!"
Shedr opst hecall andIl augh.Noxol oiscr azy .We
metatt hestri
pcl ub.Shewasmyment orandt aught
met her opesorshoul dIsaypol es.Shewast hef i
rst
personIl etinandcr i
edt o.Shei sagr eatbakerand
shet ookashor tbusinesscour seandshehadsav ed
upsomemoneyt oopenupherownr egi
stered
baker yintownandshe' sbeent ryingtogetmet o
workf orherbutI 'm notmeantf orthekitchen.I 'ma
dancerandagr aduatedl awst udent .Theonl y
eatablet hi
ngIcanmakeconsi st sofnoodl esandan
omel et.Myt eenagesi steristheonet hatcooksIj ust
buygr oceries.Istil
ltreatherlikeaki dev ent hough
she's15.She' ll
alway sbemybaby .She'sallIhav e
l
eft.

UNYEZI
Thealarm onLangasphonewakesusup.I
tsst
il
la
bitdar
kout si
deandmyanklei
sswoll
enandpainf
ul.
Ipopgum intomymout h.
"
Mybackhur
ts.
",
Langawhi
nes.
"
I'
dgi
veyouamassagebuti
tsl
ate.Cany
ouhel
pme
j
ump?"
"
Your
eal
lyhur
t.I
'
llf
etchy
oul
atersoIcant
akey
ou
t
oadoct
or.
"
"
Okay
."
Heki
ssesmeandIsmi
l
eint
otheki
ss.
"Pl
easedon'
tmenti
onmynamet oyourf
atherwhen
heaskswhathappenedt
oyou.Youknowhedoesn't
l
ikeme."
"Heli
kesyou.Aunt
ysay
stheSosi
bomenar
eal
l
natur
all
ymean."
"
Hehasoneoft
hose'
I
'l
lki
l
lyou'
looks.
"
"
Asi
fyou'
dlethi
m."
"
Iwould.Can'
tsayt
hesamef
ormybr
other
sand
f
ather
."
"
Poort
aima.
(dad)
"
"
Sowhenar
ewegoi
ngbackt
oDur
ban?
"
"
Myl
eav
eendsnextweek.
"
"
Kambey
ouhav
ewor
k."
"
Imi
ssedwor
k.Iam al
soappl
yi
ng.
"
"
Forwhat
?"
"
Psy
chol
ogy
."
"
Real
l
y?"
"
Yes.Iwantt
ohel
ppeopl
e."
"
I'
m pr
oud.
"
"
Ilov
eyouandappr
eci
atey
oursuppor
t.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.Ipr
omi
sed.
"
Wekissandgetoutoft hecar.Helift
smeupand
hel
psmeov erthefence.Iki
sshi m andli
mpback
i
nsi
de.Hewat chesmegeti nsidethehouse.Iget
i
nsi
deandmyaunti salr
eadyupdr inki
ngtea.
"Besengi
thi
awusabuy
i!
"(It
houghty
ouwer
en'
t
comingback.)
"
Haaunt
ie.
"
Il
i
mpt
othecouchnextt
oher
.
"
Whathappenedt
oyourankl
e?"
"
Ifel
lwhi
l
ejumpi
ngt
hef
ence.
"
"Ukuni
kakamnandi boumkwenyana.Songaze
uli
malel
eisende?(oursoni
nlawmustbegivi
ngitt
o
yougood.Your at
hergethur
tbecauseofdi
ck?)
"
"
Aunt
y!"
,Isayl
aughi
ng.
"Angikuxeki
.Hambauyogezaunukaucansi
phu!
(I
'm
notjudging.Gobat
h.Yousmellofsex.
)"
Ilaughandst andupl impi ngt omyr oom.I tsact uall
y
myf ather'sbuthesai dhewi l
lsleepwi t hMkhul uin
hisrondav el.Aunt yiswayt oobl antIt hinkshaki ng
myheadasIt aket hehotwat ersheboi l
edf orme.I
stri
pnakedandIr emembert heact i
v i
tiesofl ast
night .Il
ookatt her ingandsmi lewhi l
eput tinga
handonmychest .Af tertakingabat hIdomy
mor ni ngritual.Ilightt hei ncenseandcandl esand
startsay ingmycl annames.If eelpresencesi nthe
room.If eel thehai r
sonmyneckst andupandIst il
l
haven' tgot tenusedt oit.Dadsuggest edt hat
ngiphahl e(consul twi t
hmyancest ors)ev erymor ning
sot heycanl i
ghtmyj ourney .Istartthanki ngt hem
forLangaandIt ellmygr andmot herIfor gi
v eherand
Ifeelwetnessonmyshoul der.Iwipeitandi
tswet.I
l
ookupandt here'snosi
gnofwat er.Il
ookatthe
candlesastheygl owbri
ghter
.IknowGogo.
Ngy akuxol
ela.(Iforgi
vey
ou.)

BHEKI
KHAYA
Iam par kedout sideherpl acef ort hesecondt ime
todayandI 'm smoki ngmyci garette.Iwentt oher
wor kplaceandt heysai dshedi dn'tcomei nt oday.I
getoutoft hecarandIst andatt hegat ef orawhi le.
Weexchangedwor dsearli
eronandIknowIshoul d
stayawaybutsomet hingkeepspul l
ingmebackt o
her .Shemaybet heoneI '
v ebeenl ookingf or.I
hav en'tev ent ol
dmybr othersabouthery etonl y
Khul ekani andThandoknowsabouther .Thando
saidgi rl
sl ikeitwheny oupestt hem butwhatofshe
hat esit.Ist ompont hecigar ett
easIopent hegat e.I
wal kinsidet heyardandIst andi nf r
ontoft hedoor .
Ther ear ev oicesinside.Allfemi nine.Fucki t!Ifshe
tal
kst rashagai nI'mf ucki
ngsomesensei ntoher .
Imagesofheront hatpoley esterdayf lashi nmy
mi ndandIshaket hem away .I
fshe' stheonet han
she'sgot
taquit
.Nogr
oupofmenwill
gapeandget
erecti
okovermywoman.If
inal
l
ydeci
detoknock.
"
Comei
n!"
,av
oicey
ell
sinsi
de.
Iopent
hedoorsl
owl
yandwalki
nsidesl
owly.Ihav
e
6eyesonmeassoonasIcl
osethedoorbehindme.
"
Sani
bona.
(hel
l
o)"
Theyallkeepqui
etandj uststar
eatme.I
'
m usedto
thi
sreacti
onfrom l
adies.Ikeepmyeyesontheonly
twopairsofeyesthatmaybel ongt
omyfuturewi
fe.
"
Ah.Bheki
khay
a?"
"
Yeah.IthoughtImi
ghtcomebackandt
alkabout
whathappenedearl
i
er.
"
Shestandsupandshebal
ancesher
selfonthe
coach.Inot
icet
hebot
tl
esofwineonthetable.
"
Sisi
.I'
m goi
ngt
osl
eep.
",
ayounggi
rlsay
s.
"
Uhokaysweet
y."
Thegi
rl
sgoest
ooneoft
het
wor
ooms.
"
Uh.
..Noxol
othi
sisBheki
khay
a."
Thegi
rlont
hef
loorsmi
l
es.
"
I'
vehear
dal
otabouty
ou.
"
Il
ookatKuhl
eandshelooksatthegir
lint
roduced
asNoxol
o.Soshe'
sbeental
kingaboutme?Good.
"
Wecant
alki
nmyr
oom.
"
"
Alr
eady
?That
hagi
rl
."
,t
hegi
rlcal
l
edNoxol
osay
s.
IlaughatthatandKuhl ewalkstoherroom.Shei s
dressedinshor t
sandspor t'
sbraanddamnshe' s
gotmeanassl egs.IstareatherassandIf eelt
he
l
ittl
emandownt heregetexcit
ed.Nowi snotthe
perfectt
imef oraboner .Shesit
sonherbedl i
kea
kidwithherlegscr ossedandIcan'thelpbutimagine
thearoundmywai stasIst r
okeintoher.Icansee
herpussyprintandbr osmami gotitt
hick!
"
Khay
a!"
Ist
opst
ari
ngandshet
akesapi
l
lowandhi
desaway
mygoodvi
ew.Damn!
"
Tal
k."
"
Aboutear
li
er.Youdon'
thav
etoapol
ogi
se.
"
Shelooksatmeli
keI'
vegrownadi
ckonmyhead.
DidIsaysomet
hingwrong?
"
What
?"
"You'
retheonethati
nsul
tedme.Bar
gedi
ntomy
house.Youshouldapol
ogise.
"
"
Me?
"
Shel
ooksatatme.
"
Okay
.Uhm.
..Sor
ry?
"
"
You'
ref
ucki
ngwi
thmer
ightnow.
"
"
Iwon'
tmi
ndr
eal
l
y."
"
Khay
ali
sten-
"
"
Sssh.
"
Iputmyf
ingeronhermout
h.
"
Sayi
tagai
n."
"
Saywhat
?Remov
eyourf
ingerf
rom myl
i
ps!
"
"
Sayi
tagai
n.Pl
ease.
"
"
Khay
amahn!
"
Ir
emov
emyf
ingerandsmi
l
e.
"
Sayi
tmor
egent
le.Act
ual
l
ymoani
tout
."
ShelooksatmeandIstar
eint
oherey
es.The
atmospher
ethi
ckens.
"
Sayi
t.
"
Ipul
lherl
egsandgeti
nbet
weent
hem.Idr
yhump
her.
"
Khay
a."
,shemoansi
t.
It
hinkthi
sist
heperf
ectmoanI '
veev
erhear d.Iget
of
fherashardasiti
s.Dadtaughtmepatience.Isi
t
whereIwasseat
edandshesi t
supstrai
ght.Ibit
e
mylowerli
passhetakesbr
eathsandherboobs
mov eupanddown.
"
Idon'
twanttotakeadvant
ageofyou.You'
redr
unk.
I
'
llcomebacktomorrowekseni
.(
int
hemor ni
ng.
)"
Ist
andupandf
ixmyboner
.
"
Wai
t.
"
Ist
oponmyst
eps.Il
ookatherandshel
ooksatme.
"
Nev
ermi
nd.Tomor
row.
"
Ismi
l
eandwal
kout
.
"
ByeNoxol
o."
"
Ciao.
"
Iwal
koutandassoonasIgeti
ntot
hecarIhi
tthe
st
eer
ingwheel
.
"
Fuck!
"
Idr
iveof
fwithaboner
.IguessI
'
llbeDSTVt
oday
.
Sel
fserv
ice.
31
LANGALAKHE
Iparkacr osst heroadt extUny eziI
'm outside.Her
grandfatheri ssit
tingundert heshadeasusual .I
'm
nevernear ingthatt r
eeev eragai
n.Thisf amilyi
s
weirdandv eryrude.IseeUny ezikneel nexttoher
grandfather .Weusual l
yt alkforhoursandat00: 00
wepr ayt hanwet alkti
l
l oneofusf all
sasl eep.Her
auntscomesoutoft hehouseandwal kstowards
thegate.Shest andsbyt hegatewi t
hherhandson
herwai standshout sforme.
"
Mkhweny
ana!
(soni
nlaw)
"
Igetoutoft
hecarandwal
ktowardsher
.It
akeout
myhatandwr i
ngiti
nmyhands.
"
Sawubonaaunt
i(
hel
l
oaunt
y).
"
"
Wangasangeni
?(whyar
en'
tyoucomi
ngi
n?)
"
"Ei
shaunti
uyazi
angamul eki
le.Bengi
sacelauUnyezi
ngi
muyisekadokotel
a.(
youknowI 'm notwelcome.I
j
ustwantUnyeziIwanttotakehertot hedoctor
.)
"
"
Hay
iwena!Sowul
i
khokhel
i
lei
khekhel
akhe.Ngena.
(
Noman!You'
vepai
dforherv
agi
na.Comei
n.)
"
Ienterthegat
eandshewal ksustowardsthetree.I
f
thattr
eegetsoffi
t'
srootandhit
smewi t
hit'
s
branchesI'
m cut
ti
ngitdown!IsmileatUnyeziand
shelooksdown.
"
Sawubonamkhul
u.Uny
ezi
."
(heygr
andpa.
)"
"
Yebondodana.
(heyson)
"
Unyezi
sauntgetsmeachai randIsi
tamet r
eaway
fr
om theshade.Idon'
twantanymist
akes.Inot
ice
Unyezil
aughbehindherj
acket.
"
Besengi
weol
ukhul
ungawe.
"(I
'
vehear
dal
otabout
y
ou.)
"
Ihopei
tsonl
ygood.
"
"
Yes.Toogoodt
obet
rue.
"
Heputshiselbowonhiskneeandpoint
satme.Thi
s
guy
sey ebr
owsorshouldIsayeyebr
owcauseit
s
j
ustonestrai
ghtli
nei
ssot hi
ck.I
tsl
i
kehismini
hair
.
"You'
vepr ov
enyourlovetomydaught
eryest
erday
.I
respectyou.Youpaidalotofmoneyf
orherandI
hopey oudon'tt
hinkyouownher.
"
"
No.Notatal
l
.Iwasn'
tbuy
ingher
."
"Good.Westil
lhavealott
otal
kaboutsonbutt
his
oneneedstogot othedoct
orsi
nceshejumps
fencesatni
ght.
"
IcoughandUny
ezi
pret
endst
onothearhi
m.
"
Jumpsf
ences?
"
"
Iknow.Thi
sismyyard.Icanhearev
enwhen
t
here'
sananti
ntheyard.
"
Hesqui
ntshi
sey
esatusandIcastmyey
esdown.
"Kodwaakusenani.Hambani
.WenaUny eziuy
eke
ukuzenzauJacki
eChina!
"(Butthenit
snotmuchofa
bigdeal.Leav
e.YouUnyezi
.Stoppretendingt
obe
Jacki
eChan. )
Il
aughandUnyezishoot
smeadeat
hgl
areandI
chokeonmylaughter
.
"
Jacki
eChanMkhul
u!"
"
Oksal
ayoungi
thol
i
le.
"(Asl
ongy
ougotme.
)
Shel
impsoutoft
heshadeandIonl
yli
ftherup
whenit
ssaf
e.
"
Sal
ekahl
emkhul
u."(
Bye.
)
Hewav esandIwalktothecarwit
hherinmyarms.
She'
sheavierthanusual
.Shemustbelovether
ural
l
if
e.Iputherinthecargentl
yandIj
umpi nt
omyseat.
"
You'
reokay
?"
"
Yes.
"
Ismi
l
eandl
eanov
ert
oki
ssher
.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyouwaymor
e."
Ist
arttheengineanddr i
vethr
oughthedustystreet
s
wit
hUny ezisl
eeping.Shemustbetired.Wehardly
sl
eptlastni
ght.Iparkoutsi
deDr.
Singh'spr
act
ice
andopenherdoorandwakeherup.
"
Sthandwasami
.(
myl
ove)
"
Sheopensherey
es.
"
Ses'
fi
ki
le?
"(We'
vear
ri
ved?
)
"
Yeah.Woza.
"(
come.
)
Ipi
ckherupandwewal
kinsi
de.I
tsnotf
ull
wear
e
act
uall
ythi
rdinl
ine.Peopl
eoptf
ort
radi
ti
onal
medici
nearoundhere.
"
Isi
tpai
nful
?"
"
WhenIst
eponi
thar
d."
"
Kar
ateKi
d."
,Isayl
aughi
ng.
"
KodwaLanga!Uy
azi
bona?
!"(
ButLanga!Yousee
y
oursel
f?!
)
"
Okaysor
ryThongPo.
",
Il
aughhar
derandshesmi
l
es.
"
Uyabhor
ashame.
(you'
rebor
ing.
)"
Ismi
leandki
sshercheek.Ipl
aywi
thhercheeksas
shei
sonherphone.
"
Langa!
"
"
What
?"
"
Stoppul
l
ingmycheeks!
"
"
Okay
."
Istartpl
ayi
ngwi
thherhai
r.I
tssof
luf
fy.Ir
ubher
scalpandshemoans.
"
Hay
iUny
ezi
."
"
Car
ryon.
"
Icar
ryonandt hel
adynextt
ousisl
ooki
ngatusl
i
ke
we'r
eidi
ots.Idon'
tcar
eI'
m gi
vi
ngmywomanahead
massage.
"
Ouch!
"
"
Sor
ry.Youhai
rgotcaughtuponmywat
ch.
"
"
Ngy
eke.
"(Leav
emeal
one)
Iputmyhandaroundhershoul
derandputmyhand
i
nsideherdr
essandplaywit
hherboob.
"
Ouch!
"
"
What
?"
"
Myboobsar
epai
nful
.Dontsqueezet
hem.
"
Inodandst
artpul
l
ingherear
.She'
sonherphone.
Inst
agr
am t
obeprecise.
"
Howcomey
oudon'
thav
einst
agr
am?
"
"
I'
m busymaki
ngmoneyf
orpost
ingpi
ctur
esf
or
f
oll
owers.
"
"
But
-"
"Don'
ttr
yconv
inci
ngme.Postonmybehal
fony
our
page.
"
"You'
resuchabor
e.Bengi
zopol
angawe.
"(Iwas
gonnasecuret
hebagwithyou.
)
"I
'
m alr
eadymaki
ngmoneyev
erysecond.I
'
m not
greedy
."
"
Iam.
"
"Soyou'dl
ikei
tifwomenmast
urbat
edt
omy
pict
ures?"
"
Act
ual
l
yyou'
ref
inewi
thoutI
nst
a."
"
Yousee-
"
"
Uny
ezi
Sosi
bo!
"
Ihel
pherst andandl i
ftherupi
ntotheconsultat
ion
room.Ilayheront hebedandsitnexttoher.The
doctorcomesinandgr eet
sus.ShetouchesUny ezi
s
ankl
eandshewi nces.
"
Begent
le.
",Iscol
d.
Iki
ssUnyezishandast
hedoct
orr
ubsoi
ntmenton
herandputsonabandage.
"
Shet
wist
edherankleabitbutshe'
llbefine.I
'
dgi
ve
y
oupai
nki
ll
ersbutIcan'
ti
ny ourcondit
ion."
"
Condi
ti
on?
",Uny
ezi
asks.
"
Sor
ry.Thepr
egnancy
."
"Pr
egnancy
?",
Uny
ezi
asksl
ooki
ngatmeandIl
ook
away.
"
Youdi
dn'
tnot
ice?Wantascan?I
'
llchar
get
hou.
"
"
It
sokay
.Justscan.
"
Shelaysont hebedagainandt helookshe'
sgiving
mehasmel ookingalloverthi
sroom.Shelif
tsher
shir
tupandherst omachl ooksplumperandrounder.
Itr
ytouchingitbutsheslapsmyhand.Ir emovei tas
theoldwomanappl iesgel onherandshehisses.
Shestart
smov i
ngthisthingonherstomach.
"
Gudugudugudu.
"
"
That
sthehear
tbeat
."
Ismil
easIt akeoutmyphoneandst ar
trecor
ding.
Unyezist
artscryi
ngandIwipeoffthegel
.Ihugher
andshecr i
es.Idon'
tsayanyt
hingbutj
ustholdher
.
Shefinal
l
ycalmsdown.
"
You'
reokay
?"
"
Don'
ttouchme.
"
"
Whatdi
dIdo?
"
"
Youkeepi
mpr
egnat
ingme!I
tst
ooear
ly!
"
"
Sor
rybutwebot
hknewwe'
dgether
ewi
thf
ucki
ng
r
aw.
"
Sheignor
esmeast hedoctorcomesbacki nand
handsusthesonarscans.Shesaidshe' sonemont
h.
Mycalcul
ationsaretel
l
ingmeshef ell
pregnant
whenwewer efucki
nginthebathroom.Idrivet
omy
housewit
hherj ustl
ookingoutsi
det hewindow
si
lent
lycr
ying.

KUHLEKONKE
Itakeahugegul pofthecof f
ee.Mysi sterisat
school andNoxololef
tearli
eron.Ihav eaheadache
andIlookl i
keI'
mf rom azombi eapocalypsemov ie.I
l
ayont hecouchslowlyandIy ell
atmy selffor
drinki
ngsomuchy ester
day.Af t
erKhayal eftwe
dranklikefi
sh.Thatguyleftmeal lhotandbot her
ed
yesterdayIf eltli
kecr yi
ng.Istil
lfeelhi
m humpon
mewhenIi magi nei t.Isitwrongt hatt
hinkingabout
himi nbet weenmyt hi
ghsgi v
esmeanor gasm?He
j
ustr eleasedt hei nnerhoei nme.Aknockdi st
urbs.
Whot hefucki sit? !Istandupgr oaningasIgoopen
thedoor .Hei sst andi ngtherelookingli
ket hemeal
heis.Iev enf orgotabouthi m comi ngtoday.I'
m not
evengoi ngt ot r
yf ixingmy selfup.AslongasIt ooka
bath.Appr eciatet heef fort
.
"
Youl
ookl
i
keamess.
"
"
Iknow.
"
Imov eoutofthewayandheent erscl
osingthedoor.
Idragmy sel
ftothesi
tt
ingroom andlayonthe
couchagain.Helif
tmylegsupandsi t
sdownbef ore
putti
ngthem ontopofhim.
"
Hangov
er?
"
"
Ahect
icone.
"
"
Shame.Hav
eyouhear
d?"
"
Hear
dwhat
?"
"
Under
groundwasbur
nty
est
erday
."
Isi
tupandgr
oanasmyheadt
hrobsmor
e.
"
What
?Whatt
ime?
"
"Idontknow.Rumorhasi
tthef
ir
est
art
edaf
tert
hey
closed.
"
"
Great
!I'
mjobl
ess.Ihav
efuckenbi
l
lst
opay
!"
"
Youcanst
il
lfi
ndanot
herj
ob.Unl
essy
oul
ovedy
our
j
ob.
"
"
Ihat
edi
tbuti
tpai
dthebi
l
ls.
"
"
Sowhati
syournextpl
an?
"
"
I'
ll
havetoaskNoxi
fherof
ferst
il
lst
ands.I
'
m
f
ucked!
"
"
Icanhel
pyououtwi
tht
hebi
l
ls.
"
"
NoIal
way
shav
eapl
an.I
'
llmanage.
"
Henodsandr ubsmyl egs.Ican'
tbel
ievenoonehas
tol
dmeaboutt hi
s.Idon'tevenknowwher emy
phonei
s.Ican'tworkatabaker yi
fIcan'
tbake.
"
YouknowI
'
m gl
adt
hatpl
acebur
ntdown.
"
Il
ookathi
m andhel
ooksatme.Thest
arsar
ebr
ight
.
"
Nomanwi
l
lbeget
ti
nger
eti
onsov
ery
ou.
"
Idon'tanswerhim andhishandsrubupabitandhe
caressesmyt hi
ghs.Ift
hisguyknewhowl ongI
haven'tbeentouchedli
kethathewouldn'
tbedoi
ng
thi
sr i
ghtnow.
"
Situp.
",
hi
stel
l
sme.
Isitupgent
lyandf acesme.Myey esgodownt ohi
s
dickandIcanseei tthati
tshard.Imov emyeyes
awayasmycl i
tdances.Isitbi
tchyifIcl
imbt
hisguy
anddoasIpl ease?Wor sehisastranger.
"
Arey
oui
nar
elat
ionshi
p?"
"
No.Why
?"
"
Good.Idon'
twantt
oeatwher
esomeonei
seat
ing
t
oo.
"
"
Whatar
eyoueat
ing?
"
"
You.
"
Il
aughandhesmi
l
es.Thosedi
mpl
esLor
d!
"
Fuck!
",
hesay
srubbi
nghi
sface.
"
What
'swr
ong?
"
"
Ihav
enev
erdonet
hisbef
ore.
"
"
Donewhat
?"
"Thi
s.Wher
eIhav etot
hreadcar
eful
l
yar
oundagi
rl
causeshemightpushmeawaybutIwantt
obang
hersobad.
"
"
Youj
ustsaywhat
every
out
hinki
ngheh?
"
Heput
shi
selbowsonhiskneesandrubshisface
wi
thhi
spal
ms.Hemov eshishandsoutofhisface.
"
Iwantt
ofucky
ousobad.
"
Il
ookatt
hiscut
eal
i
eninfrontofme.I
nmyhi
stor
y
ofbei
ngwit
haguythi
sisafir
st.
"
Konke.I
'l
ltakey
outodatesafterbutr
ightnowj
ust
l
etme..
.Letmehiti
t.Testdr
ive."
Godarey outemptingme?Causei fyouar
eits
worki
ng.WhenIdon' tanswerhestandsupand
headsforthedoor.Heopenst hedoorandcl
osesi
t
agai
nandl ocksi
t.Het ur
nsaroundandlooksatme.
"
Fucki
t!
"
Hewal
kst
owar
dsmeandpul
l
smebymyl
egs.Thi
s
i
sbecomi nganor m.Heget si
nbet weenmyt hi
ghs
andki ssesme.Hi sl
ipsaresosof tandIcantaste
cigarett
es.Hebitesmyl owerlipanddeepensthe
kiss.Mymi ndisatwar .Shoul
dIpushhi m away?
Shoul dIgoaheadandl ethim smash?Thehoei nme
screams" Yes!
".Hishandgoesdownandher ubson
met hroughmyshor t
s.Amoanescapesmyl i
psas
hispaceget sf
ast er
.Iarchmybackashecar ri
eson
rubbing.
"Mmmmh."
,Imoansl
owl
yandheupshi
space
causi
ngmetocum.
Hepul
lsoutoft
heki
ssandl
ooksathi
shandywor
k
andsmil
es.
"
You'
resof
uckenwet
."
Het akesof
fmyshor t
sandsinceI '
m notwear i
ng
underwearheismetbymyshav edthickv agi
na.
ThankGodIshav eeveryweek!Het akesof fhi
s
pantsandhissizei
spleasi
ngtot heey es.Hetakes
outacondom from hi
spocketandput si ton.I
'm
sprawledonthecouchwaiti
ngforhi m.Her ubs
hi
msel fonmeandent ersmeslowlyandIgasp.
"
Fuck!You'
resowar
m andt
ight
."
Hestartsmovi
ngroughl
yandIam scr
eaminginpai
n
andpleasur
e.I
fthenei
ghbor
hooddoesn'
thearme
thant
hesewall
ssurecankeepasecret
.
"
Khay
a!Aaaah!Fuck!
"
Icanf
eelhi
mi nt
hedeepestpar
tsofmeashe
pumpshardandfasti
ntome.If
eelabui
l
dcoming
andhechokesme.
"
Cum i
fyouwantt
obr
eat
he!
"
MybodyshootsupandIscr
eam asIorgasm hard.
Hemakesmehol dontot
hecouchwherey ourest
yourbackandheent
ersf
rom behi
ndbangingme
r
oughly..
.[
REMOVED]

[
REMOVED]
Hei
sroughbutIwon'
tl
ieI
'
m enj
oyi
ngi
t.Hehasme
onmykneesonthecarpetandheishi
tt
ingi
tfr
om
thebackwhi
l
ehisthumbisrubbi
ngonmyanus.He
pull
smybrai
dsandhepumpsi nt
omer ealf
ast
.
"
Khay
a!Ah!Ah!Shi
t!
"
Hegripsmywaistti
ghterandbringsmyasscloser
tohim asheput
sallofhimin.Igaspforsomeair
andgetsomeairinwhenhet akeshimselfout
.
Befor
eIcancatchanotherbreat
heheshov es
himselfi
nsi
demeandIscr eam.
"
Fuuuuuck!
"
Heputsallofhim andIswearifhecoul
dhe'dshove
hisbal
lsi
naswel l.IswearthewaghissodeepIcan
feelhi
sdi
ckgr eetmyselfesteem.Icum har
dandhe
fucksmethroughmyor gasm.Ihav emylegsinmy
armsandheent ersmesl owly.
"
Ahy
es!Fuck!
"
Theslowpacedoesn'
tl
astlongandI'
m screami
ng
agai
n.Hehasmynecki nhishandandhisnot
choki
ngmet odeat
hbutjusthasiti
nhishand.
"
Fuck!
"
Hegroansoutanddirect
smyhandt
owar
dsmycl
i
t
andIrubonmy sel
f.
"
Scr
eam myname!
"
Idon'
tfoll
owhisorderandhepr
esseshar
donmy
neckgoingreal
l
yrough.
"
Khay
a!"
Hepr
esseshi
sthumbonmycl
i
t.
"
Louder
!"
"
Khay
a!!AhFast
er!
"
Hestart
spumpingreal
l
yf astandIscream hi
sname
asIsqui
rtal
lovert
hecarpet.Hefucksmet hrough
myorgasm andhecumesgr opingmyboobi nhis
hand.
"
Fuuuuck!
"
Heshoot sthelastofhim andcoll
apsesnexttome.
We'rebothbreathingreal
lyheavyandmyv agi
nais
burni
ng.Iclosemyey esasIsleepoffmyti
redness.I
evenforgotaboutt hehangoverIhad.
32
UNYEZI
Iam onthephonewi
thmyauntandshe'
shappy
i
nstead.
"
Sowhyar
eyoucr
ying?
"
"
I'
m notreadyaunty
.Ij
ustlostSphi
wo.Ij
ustf
ound
y
'al
l.Ihavealott
odo.Ican't
.Iwon'
tmanage.
"
Langadr
oveustohishomeandI
'
m ont
hephone
wit
hauntandshe'
snotget
ti
ngme.
"
Phahl
a.Seekgui
dancefr
om y
ourancest
ors.Pr
ay.
Godknowswhathisdoi
ng.
"
Iwi
pemyt
ear
sasLangacomesi
n.
"
Pleaset
ell
Mkhul
uandDadIwon'
tbehomet
oday
."
"
Okay
."
Idropthecal landcovermysel fwiththeblanket
sas
Isnif
f.IcanhearLangawal kingar oundt heroom.
I'
m careless.HowcanIl etmy selffallpr
egnantagai
n?
JustafterIlostachil
d?Isti
llhav en'tdeal
twithmy
stuff
.Istil
lhav et
ofindthebag.Ist ill
havetoget
backt
het
hrone.
"
Uny
ezi
."
IkeepquietandIf
eel
thebeddi
p.Hesnat
chest
he
blanket
soff.
"
Hlal
angezi
nqa.
"(Si
tupst
rai
ght
)
Isi
tupstr
aightandhesi
tswi
thhi
sel
bowsonhi
s
thi
ghs.
"
Uny
ezi
.You'
rebl
ami
ngmef
ory
ourpr
egnancy
?"
Idon'
tanswerbutj
ustwi
pemyt
ear
s.
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
Ishakemyheadandhel
ooksatme.
"
I'
m sor
ryf
ori
mpr
egnat
ingy
ouagai
n."
"
Don'
tapol
ogi
ze.I
'
m al
soatf
aul
t.
"
"Whydoy
ouhav
etopushmeawayev
eryt
imey
ou'
re
hur
t?"
Il
ookdownandhel
i
ftsmyheadup.
"
Lookmei
ntheey
eandt
ell
mewhy
."
Hel
ooksmei
ntheey
eandt
hemooni
sdul
landt
he
oceant
ideshi
gh.
"Tel
lmewhyev
eryt
imeIt
ryr
eachi
ngouty
oual
way
s
pushmeaway.
"
"
I'
m..
.I.
..
",
Itr
ysay
ingsomet
hingbutwor
dsf
ail
me.
"
Ilov
ey ou.I
'm wi
l
li
ngtot
akethebul
l
etfory
oubut
mostl
yy ou'
ret
heonehol
dingt
hegun.I
thurt
s."
Hewipesawayat
earqui
ckl
y.Myhear
tbr
eaksat
t
hat
.
"Letmein.Webothl
ostachi
ld.Webothhav
ing
anotheroneont
heway.You'
renotal
oneint
his.
"
"
Langa.
"
"
NoUny
ezi
.Doy
out
hinkIl
i
kei
twheny
oucr
y?"
Ishakemyhead.
"I
'
m sorry.Iknowy ouhaven'
tful
lyhealedfrom our
miscarr
iage.Youwant edtogetbacktoschool.You
havetofindy ourheal
erbag.Thethrone.AndImay
havetakeny outwostepsbackbyi mpregnati
ngy ou
agai
n."
Ihol
dhi
shandandhel
ooksatme.
"
I'
m sor
ry.I
'
m put
ti
ngal
lthebl
ameony
ou.
"
Het
ri
est
alki
ngandIshakemyhead.
"I
thurtsLanga.I'
m scar
ed.Whati
fIlosethi
sonetoo?
I
'mt i
red.Mylif
ekeepsongetti
ngbumpyandIkeep
ondraggingyouwi t
h.Ever
yti
meIthinkI'
mf i
ndi
ng
peacesomet hi
ngalwaysgoeswrong.It
'sti
ri
ng.
"
Hepul
l
smet
ohi
schest
.
"Godnevergi
vesaproblem wi
thnosol
uti
on.He
knowsyou'l
lmanage.Justt
alktome.I
'
m here.
Acknowl
edgethat.
"
Ihol
dhimti
ght
erandsnif
fhim.Hesmel
l
sgoodbut
onethi
ngi
smissi
ng.Tobaccosmel
l.
"
Don'
tyouwantt
osmoke?
"
Hel
ooksatmequest
ionabl
y.
"
Youwantt
osmoke?
"
"No.Notme.Yousmel
lext
rasexywi
tht
heni
cot
ine
smell
."
Hel
ooksatmeandsmi
l
es.Hehast
hemostcut
est
smi
l
e.
"
Ihopemychi
l
dget
sthosedi
mpl
es.
"
"
Theycomewi
tht
hepackage.
"
Iputmyf
ingeri
nhi
sdi
mpl
es.They
'r
esodeep.
"
Letmegosmoket
hen.
"
"
Justhol
dmef
ornow.
"
Henodsandl
aysdownwi
thmeont opofhi
m.Hi
s
r
ubbi
ngmyassandhesqueezesi
t.
"
Yourboot
yist
hicker
."
"
Iknow.
"
"
Ili
kei
t.
"
"
Ofcour
sey
ouwoul
d."
Hechuckl
esandspanksi
t.
"
I'
mresi
gni
ng.
"
"
What
?Why
?"
"Ist
il
lwanttostudy
.I'
m alr
eadygettingpai
denough
forpost
ingarandom pi
ctureandal otofmyhustl
es
soIcanstil
lmanagemyl i
festyl
e.Ihavealotof
moneysav edandI'
m usi
ngi tt
opayf ormyfees.
"
"
I'
m pr
oudofy
ou.SoIcan'
tev
enhel
loutf
inanci
all
y?"
"
No.
"
"Wel
lyou'
l
lhavetosuckitup.Iworkhardsomywif
e
canbehappyandli
velav
ishandy ouaremywif
e."
"
Tobe.
"
"
You'
veal
way
sbeenmywi
fe.
"
Wesitincomf
ort
abl
esi
l
encewi
thmebr
ushi
nghi
s
chest
.
"
Mkami
."
"
Mmmmh?
"
"
Mmmmh?
"
"
Khuzway
o?"
"
Whenareyougoi
ngt
ost
artpr
epar
ingf
orour
weddi
ng?
"
"
AssoonasIgetbackt
oDurban.Thet
radi
ti
onal
weddi
ngwi
ll
beheldhere.
"
"Canwehaveourtr
adi
ti
onal
weddi
ngbef
orewego
backtoDur
ban?"
"
IdoubtI
'l
lgetti
metopr epar
eev er
ythi
ng.I
'
m busy
wi
thmyancestralst
uffplusI
'm bei
ngtaughtofour
f
amilyhi
stor
y."
"
IcanaskThandotohel
p.Aslongasweunitethe
f
amil
yandweexchangegift
s.We'l
lhav
eapr oper
t
radi
ti
onal
weddingaft
erourwhit
ewedding.
"
"
Thatsoundsbet
ter
."
"
Nowtel
lmewhathav
eyoul
ear
nedabouty
our
f
ami
ly
?"
"
It
sav
eryst
rangef
ami
l
y.Iwon'
ttakey
oursur
name.
"
"
Heh?
"
"Li
sten.Mkhul usaysI'l
lbeUny ezi
Sosibo-
Khuzway o.
Alsofirstbornsarealwaysgir
lssot heycantakethe
throne.Sphiwowast or ul
eafterme.Wehav ea
Queendom ki ndofthinggoingon.Mendon' trul
e.
ThatswhyIhav etotakebackt hethroneassoonas
Igetthebag. "
Icarr
yontel
li
nghim whatMkhul
uandDadhasbeen
tel
li
ngme.I'
velear
ntalotr
eal
ly.
KUHLEKONKE
Iwakeupt omyphoner inging.Ir
eal i
sethatI '
mi n
myr oom.Isitupandgr oanatt hepai nbet weenmy
thi
ghs.Ilookfort
her i
ngingphone.If i
ndi tunderthe
bedbuti t
snotmyphone.I tstopsr i
ngingandIt hrow
i
tont hebed.Where'sKhay a?May behel eft.Iwalk
tobathroom andpassAmandawat chingTV.Ir egret
peei
ngassoonasIl etthef i
rstdropofpeeout .
"
Shi
t!
"
IwinceandwhenI '
m donepeei
ngaf t
erwhatf
eel
s
l
ikeages.Istar
tfi
ll
i
ngthebathtubwithwar
m wat
er.
Amandast andsatthedoorandlooksatme.
"
What
?",
myv
oicecomesouthoar
se.
"
Soy
ouhav
eaboy
fri
end?
"
"
No.
"
"BhutiKhay
adi sagrees.Hesai
dhe'
l
lbebackwi
th
dinnersoIdidn'tcook."
"
Whatt
imei
sit
?"
"
17:
43.Youhav
ebeensl
eepi
ng.
"
"
Iwast
ir
ed.
"
"
Mmmmh.Ar
eyouget
ti
ngr
eadyf
orwor
k?"
"
Ourcl
ubwasburntdown.Wher
e'smyphone?Iwant
t
ohearthewhol
estor
y."
"
Iputiti
nthecharger
.Ifoundi
tnextt
othetabl
e.So
whatarewegoingtodosinceyou'
renol
onger
worki
ng?Wecant akesomemoneyf r
om ourtr
ust
f
und."
"
NoAmanda.That
'sf
ory
ourst
udi
es.
"
Igeti
nsi
det
hebat
handsi
gh.
"
What
'st
hatony
ourneck?
"
"
What
?"
"
It
sli
kesomeonest
rangl
edy
ou.
"
"
It
snot
hing.
"
"
Sisi
."
,shel
ooksatmewor
ri
ed.
"
It
snotwhaty
ou'
ret
hinki
ng.I
'
m notbei
ngabused.
"
"
Okay
.",
shesay
sst
il
ll
ooki
ngatmewar
il
y.
Shewal
ksoutandIr
ubmyneck.Dammi
tKhay
a!I
rel
axint
othebath.Ihavetotal
ktoNoxoloabouther
giv
ingmeaj ob.Ishoul
dalsocheckmyemai l
s.I
needajobtokeept hel
ight
son.Thebathroom door
opens.
"Whatdoy
ouwantAmanda?
",
Isaywi
thmyey
es
cl
osed.
"
I'
m notAmanda.
"
Iopenmyeyesandi
tsKhaya.Ishyawayandpl
ay
wit
hthebubbl
esint
hewater.
"
Washal
azay
indaba?
"What
'swi
tht
heshy
ness)
"
Not
hing.
"
"Ibr
oughtyousomet
hingforthepai
n.Idi
dn'
tthi
nk
aboutget
ti
ngyouthr
oatlozenges.
"
"
It
'sokay
."
"
Lookatme.
"
Il
if
tmyey esathim andthestar
saresti
l
lbri
ghtand
col
orful
.Ist
il
lcan'
tbeli
eveIseestar
sinhiseyes.I
ts
weir
d.
"
Konke.
"
Il
i
kei
twhenhecal
l
smet
hat
.
"
Khay
a."
"
Cany
oubemywoman?
"
"
Likeasi
nyourgi
rl
fr
iend?
"
"No.Mywoman.Gi
rl
fr
iendsar
eforhi
ghschool
boys.
"
Hesi
tsont
hecl
osedt
oil
etseatandl
ooksatme.
"
So?
"
"
Ihar
dlyknowy
ou.
"
"
Don'tgivemet hat.Ngi
mdalaKonke.IknowwhatI
want.Ican'tberunni
ngaft
eryouatthisage.I
'
m 27
year
sol d.Timeisnotonmyside.
"(I
m grown)
"
Uhm.
..
"
"
Let
'sbecl
earher
e.I
'
m notact
ual
l
yaski
ngy
ou.
"
Thi
sguykeepsonamazingme.Hej
ustcomesi
nto
myli
feandstar
tsr
unni
ngit.
"
Iboughtdi
nnersi
nceIhear
dyoucan'
tcook.
"
Amandai
sfor
war
d!Iknowshet
oldhi
m.
"
That
'sokay
.Notev
ery
onecancook.I
'
llt
eachy
ou.
"
Thisguyisrunningt
hisshipcal
l
edmylif
eal
lofa
sudden.IgetoutofthebathandIl
ookatmysel
fin
themirr
or.Ihavemar ksonmyneck.Mywai
sttoo
andmynunai sswol
len.
"
I'
m sor
ryaboutt
her
oughness.
"
Hesay
scomi
ngbehi
ndme.
"
Arey
ouusual
l
yrough?
"
"
Yeah.Iki
ndofl
osecont
rol
somet
imes.
"
"
Wor
koni
t.
"
"
Iknow.I
'
m sor
ry.
"
Inodandwr apatowelaroundmybody .Hefoll
ows
met omybedr oom.Hehandsmeadi s-
chem brown
bag.Ithankhi
m andhehelpsmeappl ytheoint
ment.
I'
l
ldri
nkt hepi
ll
saft
erI
'veeaten.Igetdr
essedwith
himlookingatme.
"
What
?"
"
Not
hing.
"
Ishr
ugandhef
oll
owsmet
otheki
tchen.Il
ookat
thepictur
ehungont hewall
.Mama.Papa.Ifhis
i
ntentionsaregoodsendmeasi gn.Wesitdown
andAmandahandsusourpl at
essmili
ng.Iknow
she'swaiti
ngt i
l
lwealonedoshecanbombar dme
withquestions.
32
5MONTHSLATER
UNYEZI
Iam inthemiddleofnowher e.Ther
earevoices
shouti
ng"sit
amhl abawet huwenaweknene! "(
Help
ourlandyourHighness)thereisamanwhohashi s
backtome.Thescenei nfrontofmeisfr
ightening
asheslaughter
speopl e.MyGr annyst
andsnextt o
me.
"
Sit
weset
husi
yaf
a."(
Ournat
ioni
sdy
ing.
)
Iwakeupsweat i
ngandLangai sasleep.Igetoutof
bedslowlymakingsureIdon'
twakehi m.Icheckthe
ti
meont heclockanditsmidnight.AssoonasIwal k
i
nsidetheroom Langamadei ndumbaIf eelt
he
presenceofmyancestorsweighingdownonme.I
l
ightmycandlesandbur nmyi ncenseasIkneel
down.
"
Thongal
ami
."
,Isaycl
appi
ng.
Iseethef
lamesbr
ight
enandgetl
arge.They
'r
e
l
isteni
ngt
ome.
"I
phuphol
ami
Gogo.Nkany
isel
eni
."(
Mydr
eam.Li
ght
upforme.
)
IgruntasItheytal
ktome.LangaonceaskedhowI
hearthem.Theyusemymi ndtotalktome.They
givemei magesofthingsI'
v eencounter
edandIuse
thattoli
sten.I
tsunexplai
nablereal
ly.
"
YeboGogo!Thokoza!
"
Iplaythedrum asIf eelaheavypresenceonmy
shoulders.Istandupandst ar
tdancing(ukugi
da)
.
Thedr um playinginmyheadasIdancear oundt
he
room.Ifeel thepresenceli
ght
enandIst opand
kneelnexttomycandl esandincense.
"
NinaboSosi
bo.Thusi
.Ncobeni
."
Iputev erythi
ngoutandIt akeoffmy
cloths( amabhay i
)andfoldthem neat
lybefore
put t
ingt hem downagain.If i
ndLangaont hecouch
drinkingmi l
k.Isi
tnexttohim withabitoftr
ouble.
Myf eetar eswoll
enfrom thispr
egnancyandal l
that
danci ng.Hehandsmeagl assofwarm mi l
kand
rubsmyt ummy .I'
m 6mont hsandIhav en'
tputalot
ofwei ghtsinceIdoyoga.
"
You'
reokay
?"
Inodwi
pingt
hemi
l
kfoam ofmyupperl
i
p.
"Af
termybi
rth.I
'
m gi
ven3monthstonur
tur
emy
chi
ldaft
ert
hatI'
m of
ftoSwazi
l
and.Thet
hronei
sat
ri
sk.
"
"
I'
m happyhowstr
ongyouare.Youhadt
ocome
f
acetofacewit
hyourmother
spastwhenyouf
ound
t
hatbag."
Ifoundt hebagi nmom' syar
dwher eshest ayedand
Ihadbeggedandpai dthecurrentowner stoletme
digupt hebag.AssoonasIt ouchedt hebag.The
spiri
tualreal
m openedupandf orthef ir
stweekI
struggledwiththedreams,pr
esencesandawhol elot
.
Ileftfortwomont hstoGobelasoshecant eachme.
Isthunyasami isver
ypower f
ulsot womont hswas
whatIneeded.I twassomet i
mest i
ringonhowI
fail
edsomet askscauseIwaspr egnant .Myf amily
hadt ookmeoutofGobel ashomewi thacowandI
hadacer emonydonef orme.Ihav ei ndumbaback
athomet oo.Langahasbeenwi t
hmeev er
yst epof
theway .
"I
t'
sti
ri
ngreal
ly
.I'
m alwaysti
red.I
'm al
waysonedge.
Iknowoursexli
feisalsosl
ackingcauseI
'
m always
i
nmyi ndumba."
"
It
'sokay
.I'
l
lwai
t.
"
Ilookedathi m andIcoul dseehewasl yi
ng.Iwas
gonet womont hsandwhenIcamebackwehar dly
hadt imef orsexwi t
htheki dsar oundandmet rying
tof i
gureoutsomeofmyf ami l
yt r
adit
ions.Hisphone
beepedandInot icedheputi tonsilentaft
erthat .I
stretchedmyhandf ormygl assofmi l
kandhe
quicklysnat chedhi sphone.Il ookedathi m andhe
putitinhispocket .Ichuckleddar klyandtookasi p
ofmymi lk.Myancest orsdon' tshowmest uffthat
i
nv olvedirectly
.Isomet imeshav et oconsultGobel a.
Istoodupandwentt oourr oom.Imov edinsince
wemar ri
edt raditi
onall
y.Igeti nsidemybl anketsand
Ilookatt hecei li
ng.
"Thongolami ngi
khanyi
sele.Thongol
ami
ngiboni
se."
,Isangsoft
ly.
Ihear
dhi
scardr
ivi
ngoutandIcl
osedmyey
es.
"
Thongol
ami
khany
isa.Thongol
ami
vezakonke.
",
I
sangr
ubbi
ngmybel
l
y.
Ihel
dthetear
sinandIl
aidt
her
eint
hought
.Idon'
t
wanttost
ress.I
'
m pr
egnant
.

KUHLEKONKE
Ij
ustgotofft
hephonewi thNoxol oandshe's
enj
oy i
ngGauteng.Shemov edt her
ewithherbaby
daddyandIcanf eeli
tsomething'snotri
ght
.She
won'tsayany
thingbutsherejectsmyv i
deocall
sbut
cal
lsmeorsendt ex
tmessages.Shehasn' t
upl
oadedapictureonhersoci alnet
workinmonths.
"
Baby
."
Il
ookathim andhesmi
l
es.Ij
ustl
ookathi
m and
walkpasshi
m.
"
Uhambani
ni?
"(Whenar
eyoul
eav
ing?
)
Hel
ooksatmeandher
unshi
stongueov
erhi
steet
h.
"Ist
il
lwon'tapol
ogi
ze.I
fIcoul
dtur
nbackt i
me.I'
d
burnthatclubov
erandoverandoverandoverand
over-
"
"Fi
ne!Youdidn'
thavear
ightt
o!WhatifNoxol
o
hadn'
toff
eredmeamanagerpositi
onatherbaker
y?!
Whatthen?!Thatwasmysourceofi
ncome!"
"
Iwasgoi
ngt
otakecar
eofy
ou.Ihav
ethemoney
."
"
Yazi
ni?Idon'
twanty
ourmoney
!"(
youknowwhat
?)
"
UyabonaKuhl
ekonkesoxabanabeseungi
khupul
ela
i
l
izwi
."(
YouseeKuhlekonkewegoingtofi
ghti
f
y
ou'r
erai
singy
ourvoiceatme.)
Ikeptqui
etandwal
kedoutoft
heki
tchen.Hi
svoi
ce
mademest opinmysteps.
"Angikucenginj
aloMaSi l
angwe.I fIfeell
i
ke
transfer
ri
ngami ll
ionintoy ouraccountyouhaveno
choicebuttousei t.Fut
hi givemey ouraccount
detail
s."(
Iain'
tbeggingy ou.)
Het ookouthi
sphoneandlookedatme.Icli
ckedmy
tongueandwalkedtomyroom.Ihear dt
hedoor
closi
ngandhiscardri
vi
ngoff.Peace.Myphone
beeped.
"
Capi
tecmoneyin.R1000000hasbeent
ransf
err
ed
i
ntoy
ouracc.Fr
om B.Khuzway
o."
Istar
edatt
hemessagewidemout
hed.Whi
l
eI'
m st
il
l
shockedamessagepopedup.
"I
'
m givi
ngyouti
llt
omor r
owtospendallt
hatmoney .
Idon'
twantevenacentremaini
ngexceptthatR30
000thatwasinyouraccount
."
Howdidheknowmybal ance?Letalonemyaccount
number
.Anothermessagecomest hrough.
"
Ohandifyoudon'tf
ini
sht
hatmoney
.I'
l
lfucksome
r
especti
ntoyou.
"
Ifeel t
het emper aturei
nt her oom escalate.Hisnot
playingont hat" f
ucksomer espectint
oy ou."part.
Weoncehadaf i
ghtandKhay adoesn'
thav efilt
erhe
saidsomeshi tandIslappedhi m.Hemadesur eI
didn'torgasm dur ingsexf oraweek.Thatwast he
mostpai nful punishmentev erandIcoul dn'
twal k
withoutlimpi ng.Bheki khay adoesn'tapologizecause
hef eelshisal way sright.Wef i
ghtaboutt hatallt
he
ti
meandIal way slose.Hisar rogantandanar ci
ssist
.
ItextedNoxol oandshecal l
edme.
"
Ami
l
li
on?
"
"
6zer
os.Wher
edoIst
artspendi
ngi
t?"
"
Howaboutst
art
ingbybuy
ingashar
einmyBaker
y."
"
You'
resur
e?"
"Yes.I
'
veheardhowyou'
rerunni
ngt
heonet
hatsi
de.
Iwanttohaveanot
heroninCapeTown.
"
"
I'
dli
ket
hat
.Somet
hingi
nmynamet
oo.
"
"Yes.I
'l
lsendy
out
hecont
ractf
astbef
oret
omor
row
ends."
"
Howmuch?
"
"
20000.
"
Man!Ist i
llhaveal otofmoneyl eft
.Amandaneeds
togetbackf r
om school fast.Weneedt othink.How
canBheki khayadot hi
stome?Hi schallengingme
andI'm asubmi ssiveandheknowsi t.He'l
lalways
win.Ikindofl i
ket hetoughlov ewehav e.Itsnotthe
l
ov einmov ies.Itsjustourlove.Yes.Isaidlove.I
l
ov ehim.Amandaal wayswant edal aptop.Ican
erectnewt ombst onesonmypar entsgraves.
Bhekikhayal i
kesexpensi veshoes.Whatel set hough?
Ismiledasani deacamet omi nd."Besmar t.Whena
mangi vesy oumoney .Usei twisel
y.Don'tbuyshoes.
I
nvest
."Ir
emembermymomswor
ds.

NDABENKHULU
"
Ami
l
li
on?
",IaskedasIst
art
edl
aughi
ng.
"
Amill
ion.Uyadelel
auKuhle.I
'm act
ual
l
ytest
ingher
ment
ali
ty.
"(Kuhleisdi
srespect
ful)
"
Whati
fshebuy
sshoesanddr
esses?
"
"She'
ssmar
t.Shecr
avesindependence.I
'
vegi
ven
heracar
d.I
tsuptoher.
"
IshakemyheadasIsi tup.Mybr other
shavefucked
uppsychos.Thandol
wet huwalksincussi
ng.We
l
ookatherasshet hrowsherbagatLangaandhe
ducks.Whatdidthi
sidiotdo?
"
HeywenaLanga!
"
Shepicksupmyv
aseandIqui
ckl
yst
anduphol
ding
herhand.
"
Let
'snotbr
eakmyt
hings.
"
"
Ngi
yekebhut
i.
"(Leav
emeal
onebr
other
.)
It
akemyv
aseandputi
tback.
"
What
'swr
ongThando?
"
"
Isawy ou!Wi
thyourtonguedeepdownsomehoes
t
hroat
.DoesUnyeziknowy ou'
recheat
ingonher
!"
Weall
lookatLangaandKhul
ekani
slapshi
m and
har
datthat
.
"
Ist
hist
ruebaf
o?"
Khul
ekani
ist
heasksquest
ionsl
atert
ype.
"Bafoakuyil
utho.Si
yantj
ontj
anakuphel
a."(
It
s
nothing.I
tsjustanaff
air
.)
Isi
tdownandl ookathim.Khul
ekani thr
owsapunch
andhedoesn' tfi
ghtback.Heknowshi swr ongandif
hedaresfightbackmeorBheki khayawi l
lhavehis
ass.Thandost ar
tscryi
ngandKhul ekanist
ops.
"You'r
eungr atef
ulbafo.Youf i
ndyourbett
erhalfand
youdot his.Loyalt
yiswhatweal wayspreach.You
knowhowmuchIdi etofinal
lymeetmyone.Uny ezi
i
spr egnantandst ruggl
ingwi t
hherstuf
f.You'
rein
thestreetsfucki
ngar ound.Peopl
earesickouthere.
Whati fyoubringherasi cknesswhil
eshewasl oyal
?
Ungi
phoxi
l
ebaf
o."(
You'
vedi
sappoi
ntedme.
Iwalkoutaftersayi
ngthatandheadt othepool
.I
j
umpi nandIt akeaswim.Istil
lhav en'
tmetmy
otherhal
fandt i
meisn'tonmysi de.Ithurt
slayi
ng
al
oneatnightknowi ngshe'
soutt heresomewher e.I
craveheral
ready.Justtohaveherl ookinmyey es
andtellmewhatsheseesi nthem.
34
UNYEZI
Il
ookedathi m ashesi ppedthecof f
eeImadef or
hi
m.Hehadabl ueey eandabust edlip.Hel iedto
mewhenIaskedhi m aboutit.Thandohadt oldme
everythingandIappr eciat
ewhatshedi dt here.She
chosemyf eel
ingsoverherbr others.Ihadmy
suspicionsbutIwasal waysbusyInev erhadt imeto
getintomucht houghtabouti t.Hegr oanedashe
star
tedsweat i
ng.Isippedmyr ooibost eaashef ell
ofhischai rcurli
nghimselfintoat inybal l
.Istoodup
andsatbesi dehim whil
ecal l
i
nganambul ance.Ilai
d
hi
sheadonmyt hi
ghs.
"
Don'
tfi
ghti
tmyl
ove.
",Isaysoot
hingl
y.
"
Uny
ezi
.It
s..
.Pai
nful
."
"Iknowmyl ov
e.That
'st
hewhol
epur
poseofi
t.Pai
n.
Embr acei
t.
"
Hewr
etchedandgr
oaned.
"
Iloveyoust
handwasami
."
,Isayki
ssi
nghi
s
f
orehead.
Si
rensr
angout
sideandt
heycamei
nfol
l
owedby
Sbhamu.
"
Mkakhekwenzenj
anj
?"(
Hiswi
fewhat
'swr
ong?
)
"
Idon'
tknow.Hesay
shi
sinpai
n."
Wef
oll
owedt
hepar
amedi
cst
il
lthei
rvehi
cle.
"
Uny
ezi
.I'
m sor
ry.
"
Ij
ustl
ookedatthem astheycl
osedt
hedoorsand
dr
oveout.Sbhamulookedatmeandwalkedaway.
"
3daysofpai
nonlymylov
e.Thatsbet
terthanwhat
I
'
mf eel
i
ngri
ghtnow.
",
Iwhisper
edandwalkedback
i
nsi
de.
Thekidsareatschool andI'
m allal
one.Ical
l hi
s
famil
yandt ell
them hi
sbrotherisinhospit
al.Isend
them t
hedet ai
lsofwheretheytookhim andgoti n
bed.Iwipedawayal onetear.Iwon'tst
ressaboutit.
Mybaby '
sheal t
h.

NOXOLO
"
Msi
zingi
yaxol
i
sa!
",Iscr
eamedasheputhi
sknee
onmychest
.
Hishav inganotherbaddayt oday.Hecameback
drunkasusual andst artedcalli
ngmenames.The
abusehasbeengoi ngonf ormont hsnow.He
startedgambl i
ngandhel ostev er
y t
hing.Ibringf
ood
tothet ableandI '
mt hinkingofanescapepl an.He
threatensmychi l
d'sli
fei fIevertryleavi
nghi m.He
hasbadconnect i
ons.Oneswher eonephonecal l
canmakemehi story
.Iwasseei ngbl ackdotsashis
kneepr essedhar der.Icantdi enow.Mychi ld.It
ri
ed
getti
ngsomebr eathinmyl ungst onoav ail
.
Every t
hingbecamedar kasIhear dsi r
ens.God
pleasedon' tl
etmedi erightnow.

LANGALAKHELI
HLE
Iwokeuptopai
nagainandwhatmadei twor
dewas
Idi
dn'
tknowwhereitwas.Mywholebodyached.
Thedoct
orssaynot
hingiswrongwit
hme.Dad
camewithGogoPumle.Guessmysibli
ngsar
esti
ll
angr
yatme.WhereisUnyezi
?
"
Ther
e'snot
hingIcandoboKhuzway
o.Uny
ezi
has
t
heant
idot
e.I
nthr
eeday
sthepai
nwi
l
lendt
hou.
"
"
Uny
ezi
?Whatdoesshehav
etodowi
tht
his?
"
"
Yoursonwr
ongedher
.She'
smaki
nghi
m pay
."
Shepacksherbagsatt
hatandexit
s.Dadl ooksat
meandIf eel
myheartknot.Iwaswrong.Iwas
sel
fi
sh.Iusedmydicktothink.
"
Whatdi
dyoudoson?
"
"
I.
..I
..
.Cheat
ed.
"
Hel ooksatmeandl eavestoo.Iwr etchandtur
n
aroundcr yi
ng.I
fshel eavesmeaf tert hi
sIwon'
t
fi
ght .Ibr
okeapromi se.Myhear tbr eaksatt
he
thoughtofherleavingme.If uckedup.Bi gti
me.I
don'tdeserveher.Isendav oicenot e.
"Unyezi
.I'
m sor
ry.Iknowy ouknow.Iwasadouche.
Thereisno..
.Ah.
..Noexcusef orwhatIdid.Idon'
t.
..
Deserveyou.Youcanl eaveme."
,Ist
opt al
kingas
anotherwaveofpainhi t
sme.
Myphonef
all
stot
hegr
ound.Il
eti
tfal
landIcr
y.
"
I'
m sor
ry.I
'
m sor
ry!
"
Doctor
swalkinandst
rapme.Theysedat
emeasI
wiggl
earound.
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
If
all
int
odar
ksl
umber
.I'
m sor
ry.
35
UNYEZI
Ij
ustcameoutofconsul ti
ngmyancest orswhen
Langawal kedin.Itsbeent oughthesepastfewday s.
Ij
ustnev erthoughthe'ddot hattome.Hegr eets
andwal kspastme.Hi sl ostweightandhelooks
l
ifeless.IfeeltearswellupandIt akedeepbr eathes
ti
llIcalm down.Idi shupf orusandt hekidsar e
vi
sitingThandosoi tsjustmeandhi m.If
eel li
ke
screami ngandcr y
ingbutIdontwantt ost r
ess.He
walksoutwhenI '
m doneeat ingandhegrabssome
wat erandhest andstherelookingatme.
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
Ii
gnor
ehi
m andputmypl
atei
nthesi
nk.
"
I'
m sor
ry.IknowIpr
omi
sedI
'
llwi
thst
andi
tal
l
."
"
Howmanyt
imesdi
dyousl
eepwi
thher
?"
"
Once.
"
"
You'
rel
yi
ng!
"
"Iswear
.Otherni
ghtswe'dtalkandki
ssbutIonl
y
sleptwi
thheronce.I
'm sor
ry.I'
m mov
ingoutsoyou
canhavey
ourspace.I
'
llsuppor
tyouandmyki
d.I
'
ll
bether
eduri
nghi
sbirt
h."
It
urnar
oundandl
ookathi
m.
"
Soy
ou'
rer
unni
ngaway
?"
"
No.IknowwhatIdidwaswr ong.Myfamil
yisn'
t
t
alki
ngtome.Igetthat
.Iunder
standthaty
ouhate
me.I'
l
lbeoutofyourhai
rbytomorrow."
Iletthetear
sfal
landhet akesast
eptowar
dsbut
somet hi
ngstopshim andheshakeshi
sheadand
turnsaround.
"I
'
m sorr
yIbr okemypr omise.Justdon'
tcrycauseI
wasungratefulandselfi
sh.Don'
thurtcauseIletmy
di
ckdot hethinkingfor
.GodknowsIl oveyoubutI
don'
tdeservey ou.Lovedoesn'
thurtandIhurtyou.
"
HewalksoutandIletasobescapemyl i
ps.Ihold
ont
othecounterasIcry
.Ithur
tssobad.Ithurt
sso
much.Whathurtsmethemosti sIst
il
ll
ovehim.I
wantt
ohatehim sobadbutIlovehim.

LANGALAKHELI
HLE
Ifeel
myhear
ttearasIhearhercri
es.WhatwasI
thi
nki
ng?Amessagefrom Sam comesthr
ough.
"Ev
erythingisi
nplacef
orFri
day.I
'
llsendoutt
he
i
nvit
ationstomorr
owmor ni
ng.Youjusthavet
oget
herthere."
Ir
epl
yback:
"
0***
***
*3.Updateheront
hebabyshower
.She'
l
lget
Uny
ezit
here.Cutal
lti
eswi
thme."
Ididn'twaitforherr
epl yIblockedhernumberandI
droveouti nhighspeed.Sam wasanev entplanner
whoIhi r
edt ohel
pmewi t
hUny ezissurpriseBaby
Showerandwest ar
tedt alki
ng.Wegotv erycl ose
andshemadeamov eonme.Thegui ltat emeup
andt hatnightshetextedmesowecant alkabout
whathappened.Wemetatt heGar ageandhad
somei cecream.Weagr eedt hatitwillnev erhappen
againandt hansheki ssedme.Iguesst hat'swhen
Thandosawus.Icoul dn'
tev enaskwhatwasshe
doingatt hegarageint hemi ddleofni ght.I '
ve
disappointedmyf amily.Daddi dn'tevenf et chme
fr
om t hehospital
.Aloudcr ashdi stur
bsmyt hought
s
asIf eelmybodygett hrownforwardandmycar
roll
sov er.Somethingjabbedmysi deasbl oodoozes
downt omyf ace.Igetoutofmyseat belt.Someone
opensmydoorandpul l
smeoutasIsmel lpet
rol
.I'
m
draggedt il
lthesi
deandmyv isi
onbl urrywhenmy
carcat chesfir
es.Sir
ensar er
ingingandI 'ml osi
ng
blood.Iletthedarknessembr aceme.Ihopet hey
helpmewheni t
stoolate.Ideservetodi e.Ibroke
thehear tofawomanwhogenui nelylovedmeov era
fewr oundsofsex.

KUHLEKONKE
AsIwalkoutKhuzwayoLawandOr derwit
habouce
tomystepacalldi
stur
bsmyjoy.It
sanof f
ice
numberal
lthewayfrom Gaut
eng.Ianswerit
.
"
Hel
l
o."
"
Ist
hisKuhl
ekonkeSi
l
angwe?
"
"
Yes.
"
"
I'
m cal
li
ngf
rom Randf
ont
einPr
ivateHospi
tal
.Ms
Noxol
oKhumalowasadmitt
edthreedaysandshe
hasy
ouashernextofki
n."
"
Uhwhathappenedt
oher
?"
"
Ican'
tsayov
ert
hephone.
"
"
Okay
.I'
l
lbet
her
e."
IdropthecallasIfeel myhandssweat ing.Igetint
o
thecarandt hesmell offr
eshleatherseatsdoesnt
evendrivemecr azyany more.Myhear tbeatisfast
anditfeelsl
ikemyhear ti
saboutt ofl
youtofmy
mouth.Ipassav er
ydr ast
icaccidentandmyhear t
beatsfaster
.Itr
ycallingBhekikhayabuthisphone
ri
ngsunanswer ed.IrememberIhav eKhulekani
s
number s.Heanswer swhenI '
m aboutt odrop.
"
MaSilangwe.Bhekican'
ttal
kri
ghtnow.We'
rei
nthe
middl
eofsomet hi
ng."
Hisv oi
cesoundslikehisabouttocry .Awomanscr y
causeshimt odropthecal l
.Iguesstheygoi ng
thr
oughsomet hi
ng.It extAmandaasIpar katthe
air
por t
.Ir
uninsi
deandpeopl earepullingthei
r
suicasesandI'
mi napant suitwi
thjustmyhandbag.
Iwaitinli
neaspeopl ebuyticket
s.Ilookupatt he
screenandthenextf l
ighttoGautengl eavesin30
minutes.Igof i
rstcl
assasthat
'stheonlyseat
avai
lable.Thisismyfir
stti
meinanai rpl
anebutmy
worryov erpowersmyfearofheight
s.Itr
yNoxoloas
soonwei ntheairandSanel
eanswer sherphone.
"
Aunt
yKuhl
e."
"
Heyboy
.Uphi
uMa?
"(Wher
e'smom?
)
"Mom isi
nhospi
tal
.Dadi
sinj
ail
.I'
m atmyaunt
s
place.
"
"
Whathappened?
"
"Dadwast
ryi
ngtoki
l
lmom.IhadherphonesoI
call
edt
hepol
ice.
"
Icl
osemyeyesasmyhear tsi
nks.Noxol
o.Idr
opt
he
cal
lasIcr
y.Themeninsuitsl
ookatmeandone
passesmeaKleenext
issue.
Fort
hatreaderwhosaidshewasn'tokay
.Somet
hing
shor
tforyou.Beokaysthandwa.
36
UNYEZI
Iwenttovisithi
m againatthehospit
alandhej ust
l
aidtherewithallthemachinesconnected.The
beepingheartmoni t
orannoyedmeandi tser
iousl
y
drovemecr azy.Iholdhi
scoldhandwi peawaymy
tear
s.
"Youalway ssai
dweshoul dtalkt
hingsoutbutyou
ran.Doy ouknowhowIf el
twhenIhear dyouhave
gottenintoanaccident
?Youdoal ltheset
hings
forget
ti
ngI '
m pr
egnant.Ifyoudontcareaboutme
thi
nkaboutourchi l
datleast.Wakeupandt al
kto
me.Tell mewhyy oudidwhaty oudid."
Iwi
peawayt
het
ear
sasasobbr
eaksout
.
"Il
oveyou.Youhurtmesomucht hou.Idon'
tthi
nkI
canevertr
ustyouagai
n.Iwantt
ohat eyousobad
but-
"
Themachi
nesst
art
edbeepi
ngandi
twasl
i
kehewas
hav
ingasei
zur
e.Doct
orscamer
unni
ngandpul
l
ed
meaway.
"
Langa!
"
Hecan'tleav
eme!Hecan' tdothattome!Hehasto
explai
n.Iwascal meddownbecauseIwaspregnant.
Ihadmybabi esheartmonit
oredandmyBPaswel l
.
Ij
ustletthetearsasIhear
ddoctorsrunni
ngar
ound
i
nt hehall
way .

KUHLEKONKE
WhenIlandedIhadabi tofastruggl
efi
ndi
ngt he
hospi
tal
.Ihadtohiresomeonewhoknewt hisplace
todri
vemear ound.Wewer eataBnBIwasr enti
ng
andshewaseat i
ngthef oodImadeforher
.Ilooked
atherbr
uisesandmyey eswelledup.
"
Whydi
dnty
out
ell
me?
"
Shel
ooksatmeandshest
aresatherf
ood.
"
Iwasscar
ed.Scar
edy
oumi
ghtj
udgeme.
"
Ishakemyheadandwi
pemyt
ear
sfai
l
ingasmor
e
cameout.
"Iwasscaredyou'
l
l geti
nvolvedandhe'dcomeafter
youtoo.Iwasscaredformyson.Het hr
eatenedt
o
kil
lhi
mi fiwer
etoev ert
ryleavinghi
m ortell
people.
"
Shelookedt
ir
ed.Shehadbagsunderherey
esand
shehadanxi
etyatt
acksev
eryti
mesomeone
knocked.
"IwassoscaredHl ehl
e.Hewoul dbeatmewi tha
beltandhe'dtel
lmehowImadehi m angry.Iwoul
d
curlmysel
fkeepingmycr i
esasqui etasIcouldso
Saneleneverheardanythi
ng.Thatday..
."
,hervoi
ce
breaks.
Istandupandsi
tnex
ttoher
.Idontt
alkbutr
ubher
backassheopensuptome.
"ThatdayIthoughthewasf inal
l
yfedup.It
houghtI
wasgoi ngtodie.Iwasscar
edf ormyson.Icoul
dn'
t
breat
heHl ehl
e.Hisknee.
..
",shesobsandIlayher
headonmyl apandIbrushherhair.
"
Hiskneerest
ri
ctedmef
rom gett
ingoxygenint
omy
l
ungs.He'
dcallmeawhore.Alowgradestr
ipper.
"
Shel
et'
sher
sel
fcr
y.Ij
ustsoot
heher
.She'
sinpai
n
andheracknowl
edgi
ngt
hati
saf
ir
stst
ept
omay
be
aheal
ingjour
ney
.
"HesaidImadehim angry.He'dsayi twasmyf ault
hebeatmeup.He'dsayi twasbecausehel ovedme.
ButloveknowsnopainHl ehle.AllIdi
dwasl ovehim
andrespecthi
m.Itr
iedmyl evelbesttomakehi m
happy.Heli
edtome.Itwasntmyf ault
.Hewasn't
manenought ofi
ghthisdemonsbuti nsteadhe
foughtme."
Inoddedatherwordsandshecarr
iedoncryi
ng.I
hadstoppedwipi
ngmyt ear
s.Thedooropenedand
Sanel
ecamei n.
"
Mama.Aunt
y.Ni
ri
ght
?"(
Y'al
lokay
?)
Inoddedandhelookedathi
sweepi
ngmot
her
.He
walkeduptoherandwipedhert
ear
s.
"
Don'
tcr
ymama.I
'
m sor
ryIcoul
dn'
tpr
otecty
ou.
"
Myhear
tbr
okeandNoxol
oshookherheadcr
ying.
"
Youprot
ectedme.Youcal
l
edt
hepol
i
cesomet
hingI
wassoafr
aidtodo.
"
Theset
wohav
eal
way
sbeencl
oseandseei
ngt
hem
embr
aceeachot
hermadesmi
l
ethr
oughmyt
ear
s.
"OhandAuntyther
earet
womeni nthel
ounge
waiv
edforyou.MalumeBheki
khay
aandMalume
Khul
ekani
."
Ilookathim confused.WhatisBhekiandhi
sbrother
doinghere?Howdot heyevenknowwhi chBnBI'
m
at?Ical
ledhim andt ol
dhim whathappenedandhe
wasangr ythattherearementhathitwomen.Iwalk
totheli
ttl
esitt
ingroom.Theyseatedthereonthei
r
phones.
"
Hey
."
Histhefi
rsttolookupandhesmi les.Thestarsarea
bi
tdull
.What '
swr ong?Ilookatthem andt heyhave
bagsundertheireyes.Isitnextt
oKhay aandhej ust
pull
smei ntoahugandhol dsmet ight
.Hisreall
ynot
okay.
"
Whatwr
ong?
"
"
Ineedy
ou.
"
"
I'
m her
e.What
'swr
ong?
"
"
Mybr
otheri
sinacoma.What
'ssadi
sifhedi
eshe'
l
l
di
ethi
nki
ngwedon'
twanthi
m nearus.
"
Il
ookatKhul
ekani
andhi
slooki
ngatt
heot
hercouch
wi
thoutbl
i
nki
ng.
"
Howdi
dy'
al
lknowIwasher
e?"
"
That
sforanot
herday
.Justhol
dme.
"
Ipul
lhimtomet i
ghterandhesobs.I'
veneverseen
hi
m cryanditbreaksmyhear t
.Khul
ekanistandsup
andexcuseshimself.I
tsatoughmomentf orthem.
Bythewayheal wayst al
ksabouthi
sbrothersIknow
howhelovesthem.
"I
tsgoi
ngtobeokay
.Pr
ay.Not
hingi
saspower
dul
asGod."
Hewi
peshi
stear
sandhel
ookssot
ir
ed.
"
Come.
"
Ihel
phim upandleafhi
mtomyr
oom.It
akeof
fhi
s
shoesandlayafl
eeceonhi
m.
"
Sleep.
"
"
Wher
e'sKhul
ekani
?"
"
Il
lgol
ookf
orhi
m.Sl
eep.
"
Iki
sshi
m andleav
ehimtor
est
.Igoout
sideandI
fi
ndKhul
ekani
smoking.
"
Yourbr
otheri
ssl
eepi
ng.Isuggesty
oudot
oo.
"
Henodsandput shi
scigarret
eout.Het akesthe
couchandIgivehi
m afleeceaswell.Isitdownand
textAmandatocheckuponher .Ihopet hepeopl
ein
boththeser
oomsheal.Ikneeldownandbowhead.
"
God.Idon'
thav
emucht
oask.
",Ist
artmypr
ayer
.
37
AFEW WEEKSLATER
KUHLEKONKE
AmandaandSanelewenttobuyussomef
ri
edchi
ps.
Noxol
oref
il
lsourwinegl
asses.
"Soyouj
ustdeci
dedt
obuyshar
esandinvesti
n
Khuzway
oLawandOr der
?Wow.I'
m pr
oud."
"Iwasnervousatfir
st.Imeant
heboardmember s
areveryscaryandthemainsharehol
derKhuzwayo
Seniori
ssoscar yandhekeptaski
ngmequest i
ons.
"
"
Soy
ouspental
loft
hemoney
?Soqui
ck?
"
Il
aughandshakemyhead.
"
No.It
ransf
err
edsomei
ntoAmandasaccount
."
"
Smar
t.I
'
m happyf
ory
ou.Youl
ookhappi
er.
"
"
Iam.I
'
m gl
adt
hatmor
oni
sbehi
ndbar
s."
Shenodsandt akesagul pofherwine.Shehasn' t
healedandshe'satt
endingtherapy
.Shehasmadea
greatfr
iendoutofKhulekaniandwet houghtthey
weredat i
ngbuttheydon'tevenseeeachot herthat
way
.
"Afri
endofmi nefrom Gautengjustmov edhere.I
'
m
meet i
nghertoday.I'
dli
keitifshecameherf or
dinnerinst
eadconsider
ingIhav en'
tfoundaplace
andI '
m sti
l
lnotcomf or
tabl
ewi t
hpubl i
cplaces.I
sit
okay?"
"
Thatwouldbeni
ce.I
'
llt
ryoutt
hisnewr
eci
peI
f
oundonli
ne.
"
"
Noi
tsokay
.I'
l
lcook.
"
"Comeon.It
saneasyI
ndi
anchi
ckencur
ry.Ipr
omi
se
Iwon'
trui
ndinner
."
Shelooksatmeandmakest
hatsl
urpi
ngsoundwi
th
herwine.
"
Comeon.I
'
lldoi
tri
ght
."
"
You'l
lst
artearl
ysoi
fitbackf
ir
esI
'
m or
der
ing
Chi
nesefood."
"
Argh.I
'
llpr
ovey
ouwr
ong.
"
Shelaughsandstar
tsdanci
ng.Ij
oinherandwe
danceli
kenobodyiswatchi
ng.She'
sagreatfri
end
andseeinghersmil
emakesmyhear tdance.The
ki
dsent
erandwest
arteat
ing.
"
Sanel
e.AuntTshegoi
scomi
ngl
ateron.
"
"
Real
l
y?Yes!
"
"
AndAuntKuhl
ewi
l
lcook.
"
"
Oh?Uhwow.Can'
twai
t.
"
"
Comeonguy
s.Al
i
ttl
efai
thi
nme?
"
"
Wel
lSi
si.Youei
therbur
nory
oureggsar
eraw.So.
..
"
"
Ipr
omi
sey
'al
ltoni
ght
'sdi
nnerwi
l
lbet
ast
y."
"
Ohmy
!I'
m cal
l
ingBhut
itodi
ewi
thus.
"
"
Mxm.
"
Isul
kanddr
inkmywi
ne.Theyl
aughanddance.

UNYEZI
Iwal ki
ntohiswar dandhei sst
aringatther oof
.I
standbyt hedoorlookingathim andhehasn' t
noticedmey et.Icl
oset hedoorandhel ooksatme.
Themooni sdullandtheoceanist i
red.Istandnext
tohisbedandwej ustlookateachot her.
"
Uny
ezi
.I'
m sor
ry.
"
Il
ookathi
m astear
swell
upandIsitdown.Ihand
hi
mthecontai
nerandhethanksme.
"IknowI '
vewr
ongedy ou.Imadeitworsebyr
unning
away .Ibr
okeyourheartaft
erIpr
omisedtopr
otect
i
t."
"
Whydi
dyoudoi
t?"
HelooksatmeandIthi
nkit
sgoingtobeoneof
t
hosedayswherehedoesn'
tanswerme.
"
Idon'
tknow.I
tjusthappened.I
-"
"
Youdon'
tknow?
"
"
Uny
ezi
.Letmet
alk.
"
Inodandsi
tproperl
yrubbi
ngmybel
l
y.Hel
ooksat
mybell
yandInoticehi
m smil
e.
"I
thappenedonce.Shewasanev entplannerIhad
hiredforyoursurpri
sebabyshowerwhi chIguess
didn'thappen.Weusedt otal
kandI '
dtellhermy
wor r
iessinceyouwer eal
way sbusyandIdi dn'
twant
tosoundsel fi
sh.ItwasmeaninglesssexandIdon't
event akeitt
omi nd.Inevert
houghtI'
ddot histoyou.
Inev erthoughtI'
dbr eakyourhear tli
ket hi
s.WhatI
fearedthemosti sy ouleav i
ngmesoIr anbefor
e
youdi d.Iwantedt odieinthatcaracci dentsoyou
andmyf amil
ycanf eelbetterwit
hout .Ibought
shameunt omyf atherandmybr ot her.Ibr
okeyour
heart.Put t
ingmyki datrisk.I'
mr eall
ysor r
yUnyezi
.
I'
llunderstandifyouwantt oleav
eme. "
Iwi
pemyt
ear
sandt
akehi
shand.
"Il
oveyouUny
ezi
.You'r
ethebestthingthatev
er
happenedt
ome.Itai
ntedthepur
et hingwehave.I
'
m
sorr
y."
"Langa.You'
regoi
ngtomakemef eell
i
keaclown
causeIstil
ll
oveyou.Ist
il
lwantt
oli
einyourhands.
I.
..
",Il
etouradeepbreat
h.
"Iwil
lnevertrustyouthesame.Myl ov ethouwill
neverchanget hou.Youpromisedt obepat i
ence
withmebut ..
.I'v
ecriedandtalkedtoDrSamboandI
feelbett
er.IneverthoughtI
'dattendt herapyagain.
Youal mosttookmebackt othatdar kplace.I
almostkill
edy ouLanga.Youal mostdi ed.Andnext
ti
mey out hi
nkofcheat i
ngonmer emembert his.I
cookfory
ou.I
'
llpoi
sony
ouandbur
yyouunderour
bed.
"
Helooksatmewi
deey
edandhecanseeI
'
m not
pl
aying.
"
CanIhol
dit
?"
Ipul
lmychai rcloserandherubsmyt ummy .My
babystart
skickingandIsmi l
einvol
untar
il
y.Ihave
for
giv
enhi mf ormysakebutIhav en'
tfor
gotten.I
don'
ttrusthi
m.I '
llbewatchi
nghiseverymov e.

KHULEKANI
Wepar ki
nsi
deKuhl
esy
ardandwesi
tint
hecarf
ora
second.
"
Langasai
dhei
sget
ti
ngdi
schar
gedi
ntwoday
s."
"
Hel
ooksl
i
kehi
sdead.
"
"Hi
ssti
llt
ryi
ngtoapologi
zetoUnyezi
.Ihopet
hey
pul
lthr
ough.Theyneedeachother
."
Inodandwel
i
ghtourci
gar
ett
es.
"
Yout
hinkDadi
sseei
ngsomeone?
"
"
Whywoul
dyousayt
hat
?"
"Iwentt
ohi
shousefewday sagoandIcoul
dhear
moansbroandthewaythatpersonwasscr
eaming
shewasgett
ingi
tgood.
"
Bheki
laughsandIj
oinhi
m.
"
Dad?Seni
orKhuzway
o?Iwantt
omeett
his
woman.
"
"
Bro.Ir
anoutoft
hathousel
i
kecast
ersemeny
a."
"
Uyaphaphanawe!Bowuy
aphi
?"(
Youar
eal
so
f
orward!Wher
ewereyougoi
ng?)
IlaughasIgetoutoft hecar.Weknockandl et
our selves.Thefi
rstt
hingwedoi ssnifftheamaz i
ng
smel l.TheysaidKuhlewascooki ng.There'
snoway
i
twoul dbesmel l
ingthisgood.Wewal kintothe
kitchenandshei swithNoxol oandav erybeauti
ful
thicky ell
owbone.
"
Ladi
es.
",wegr
eet
.
Bhekiki
ssesKuhleandIhi
ghthet
woladi
esandIl
i
ft
theunknowngir
lupabitcausi
nghert
osqueal
.
"
Hai
bonj
aloKhul
ekani
."
,Noxol
osay
sey
eingme.
Ilaughandshel i
ft
shergl assatmewal ki
ngaway.
She'sdoi nggoodandsheseemst obegetti
ngbet
ter
.
Wedeal twithherboyf
riend.Bhekihassomemenon
theinsider uf
fl
ehim up.Mendon' thitwomen.You
dealwi t
hy ourwomani nbedandi fnomanknows
thisthant heyshoul
dn'tbeconsideredmen.
"
I'
m Khul
ekani
."
,Isaysmi
l
ing.
"
I'
m Tshegof
atso.
",shesay
sav
oidi
ngey
econt
act
.
I'
m maki
ngheruncomfort
abl
esoIsoftenmygaz e
andshelooksatme.Agaspescapesherplumplips
andIeyethem.Whyisshemakingmef eel
liket
his?
"
Yourcont
act
sar
ebeaut
if
ul.Iwantt
hem.
"
"
Mycont
act
s?"
I
'
mver
yconf
usedbutsheseemst
akenbymyey
es.
"
Yes.Theyhavear
ainbow.I
tssobeaut
if
ul.Il
ove
r
ainbows.Ihav
eatatt
ooofi
t."
"
Wai
twhat
?"
Bheki
khay
alooksatmeasIl
ookathi
m conf
used.
"
Whatdoy
ouseei
nhi
sey
es?
",
heasksher
.
Shel
ooksatme,Kuhl
e,Khayaandmeagain.She'
s
st
art
ingt
ofeel
li
keaf oolandshedoesn'
tli
keit
.
"
Arai
nbow.Wai
t.Y'
al
lai
n'
tseei
ngt
his?
"
"
Onl
yyoucan.
"
ShelooksatBheki
khayaconfusedandheshr
ugs
pul
li
ngKuhleoutoftheki
tchen.
"
Whatj
usthappened?
"
"
I'
dexpl
ainbuti
tst
ooear
ly.Nowshowmet
hat
t
att
oo."
Shesmil
esandl
if
tshersl
eeveup.I
tst
her
ein
col
our
sanditl
ooksbeaut
if
ul.
"
Doy
ouhav
eanyt
att
oos?
"
"
YesIdo.Ihav
ealotact
ual
l
y.You'
l
lseet
hem when
y
ouundressme."
Shechokesonherwineandcoughs.Shesi
psher
wineagai
ntocal
m hersel
fdown.
"
What
?"
"
Youhear
dmeper
fectl
ythef
ir
stt
ime.Don'
twor
ry.I
won'
tsmashy
ouy
et."
Iopent
hepot
sasshel
ooksatwi
thherey
eswi
de.
"
Bat
hongabut
iowat
swenwahl
e."(
Thi
sguyi
scr
azy
.)
"Idon'
tspeaknowunder
standSot
ho.St
ickt
o
Engli
shwithme."
Il
i
ckmyf
inger
sandKuhl
ewal
ksi
n.
"
Khul
ekani
!"
ShesmacksmyhandasIam aboutt
ogr
abapi
ece
ofchi
cken.
"
Phuma.
"
ShepushesmeoutandIwi
nkatTshegof
atso.I
wonderhowdoesonepr
onouncet
hatname.
"
NaweTsegoy
oul
ett
inghi
m openuppot
s."
IlaughasIknowt hatnamei sn'tpr
onouncedli
ke
that.Ileav
ethem andsitwit
ht heother
s.Sanel
esit
s
nextt omeandwedooursecr ethandshake.
Ther apyseemstobegoi nggoodf orhi
m andhis
mom.
"
Baf
o?"
"
We'
l
ltal
kathome.
"
Henodsandget sbackt oli
steningt
oSanelet al
k.
Amandai sshowingmepi ct
ur esofhernewdi sh
she'sgoingtobecooking.Thi sonelovescooking
andpoorKuhl ejumpedt hegunbuthercooki ng
todaytastesdeli
cious.
38
TSHEGOFATSO
Il
ookaroundandever
yonei
slaughi
ngatKhul
ekani
andBheki
khayasj
okes.
"IneverthoughtKuhl
ecancookameal
andwe'
d
actuall
yeatit.
"-
Bheki
khay
a
Theyl
aughandKuhl
eissul
ki
ng.Myphoner
ingsand
Ismil
easthenamepopsup.
"
Excuseme.
",
Idi
srupt
.
Ist
andupanswer
ingt
hephone.
"
Babe.
"
Igot
otheki
tchen.
"
Youar
ri
vedsaf
e?"
-Tshepo
"Yes.I
'm havi
ngdinnerwi
thaf
ewf
ri
endsandI
'
m
enjoyi
ngit.They
'r
esowarm."
"
I'
m sogl
ady
ou'
real
ri
ght
."
"
Met
oo.
"
"
Ilov
eyouandI
'
m comi
ngt
ovi
sitmont
hend.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.Imi
ssy
oual
ready
."
"
Okayby
e."
"
Bye.
"
Wedr opthecallandIsmi l
e.Tshepoissuchani ce
guyandmyDadl ikeshim.I'
m goingtomi sshi
mI
havetoadmi t
.Iwal kbacktotheothersand
Khulekanii
slookingatmeandIdon' tli
ket hel
ook
hi
sgi vi
ngme.IsitdownandNoxol osmilesatme.
"
Tshepo?
"-Noxol
o
"
Yeah.Hewaschecki
nguponme.
"
Shenodsandwegetbackt oeating.Ihavet ogivei
t
toKuhl
eherfoodtast
eddel i
cious.Theguy soff
erto
washthedi
shesandI'm shocked.Iwast aughtthat
amanshouldneverli
ftafingeraroundt hehouse
causehebr
ingsfoodtothet abl
e.Sanelei scli
nging
tomeandhissleepybuthedoesn' twantt oletme
go.
"
You'
resl
eepy
?",
Iasksof
tl
y.
Heshakeshi
sheadandl
ayshi
sheadonmychest
agai
n.
"
SoTsegowhatmadey
oumov
eher
e?"
-Kuhl
e
"School
.Iwantedtobef
arf
rom Dadandhi
s
control
l
ingsel
f."
"
Hest
il
lthi
nksher
unst
hewor
ld?
"-Noxol
o
"
Youknowhi
m wel
l
."
"
Sohowol
dar
eyou?
"-Kuhl
e
"
I'
m 21.
"
"
Howdoy
oupr
onouncey
ourname?
",
Kuhl
easksm
"
Tshego.Tshe-
go.
"
"
Tshi
go.
",
shet
ri
es.
"
No.
",Isayl
aughi
ng.
"
Hay
iIgi
veup.
",
shel
aughs.
"
Justcal
lmeMal
uda.
"
"
Mal
udasoundsbet
terbutgangst
er.
"-
Kuhl
e
"
Iknow.Letmet
aket
hisf
ell
owt
obed.
"
Il
if
thim upandNox olopoi
ntsmetoaroom.Ilay
hi
m downont hesinglebedwit
hspi
ders.Helooks
j
ustli
kehisfat
herpityhi
sanasshol
e.Iwalkoutand
t
heguy
sar
eget
ti
ngr
eadyt
oleav
e.
"Tshego.Youcangetali
ftf
rom t
heguy
s.They
'l
l
dropyouoffatres.
"-
Kuhl
e
"Wehavesomewher
etobe.Wecan'
tdr
opherof
f.
",
Khul
ekani
cutsi
n.
"
Nowedon'
t.
",Bheki
khay
aar
gues.
Theyl
ookateachotherandKhul
ekaniwalksout
.I
don'
tgi
veagiveafuckabouthi
m.Asl ongasI'
m at
myroom ot
laepona(he'
l
lseehi
mselfout.
)
"
We'
l
lcomehel
pyoumov
eint
omor
row.
"-
Noxol
o
Inodandhugt hem.If
oll
owtheguysandgeti
nthe
backseat.Iputinmycoordi
nat
esintheGPSand
Bhekikhayastart
sdri
vi
ng.
"SoSegoy ou'r
eSotho?
",
Bheki
khay
atr
iesget
ti
ngr
id
ofthetensionint
hecar.
"
No.I
'
m Tswa-
"
Khulekaniputsthev olumeonmaxandst ar
ts
mov i
nghishead.Il ookathim andshakemyhead.
Hisveryrude.Isitbackandgetbackonmyphone.
Thisisgoingtobeal ongri
de.
UNYEZI
Ihel
phi
m ont
othebed.
"
Ouch.
",
Langaexcl
aims.
Ii
gnor
ehi
m andputhi
sbagdownandhel
aysback
gr
oani
ng.
"
Doy
ouneedany
thi
ngt
odr
ink?
",
Iaskhi
m.
"
No.Ij
ustwantt
osl
eep.
",
hedecl
i
nes.
"
Aft
ery
ourmedi
cat
ion.Letmedi
shupf
ory
ou.
"
Heshakeshi
sheadv
igor
ousl
y.
"
No!Uhm.
..I
'
mful
l
.",
hesay
srushi
ngl
y.
"
Iwon'
tpoi
sony
ounow.
"
"
Uhm.
..Okay
."
Il
eavehi
mther
eandIdishupf
orhi
m.Igetav
isi
on
andIst
opwhatI
'm doi
ng.
"
Uny
ezi
!"
Thevisi
onendsandIrubmyey
es.Igi
vehi
m hi
s
foodandhelooksatme.
"
You'
reokay
?"
"No.Ijusthadav isi
on.Thet hr
onei sati
tsdownfal
l
.
Ialwayshav ethesevisi
onsandt heyal
waysleav
e
medi str
aught.I'
m scared.Idon'tknowhowt ofi
ght
forthethrone.WhatifIfail
?"
"Don't
.Don'
tthi
nkl
i
ket
hat
.You'
l
ldoi
t.Don'
tbe
scared."
Isi
tdownandIfeelhim hol
dmyhand.Il
ookathi
m
andhesmil
es.Imissedhissmi
l
e.
"
Iwi
l
ltr
ymyl
evel
bestt
osuppor
tyounow.
"
"You'
veal
way ssuppor
tedme.Youj
ustl
ety
our
sel
f
getdi
str
acted."
Henodsandeats.Heisheal
ingwellbuti
t'
l
lallt
ake
ti
me.Isi
tnextt
ohim andhef eedsme.He'
llnever
stophi
swaysofthi
nkingI
'm hischi
l
d.

KHULEKANI
"
Sowhatar
eyoupl
anni
ngondoi
ng?
"-Bheki
khay
a
"
Idon'
tknowbutnomanwi
l
lbehav
ingmygi
rl
."
,Isay
pi
ssed.
Igetoutoft
hecarandbangt
hedoor.Iopent
he
doorandUnyezi
iswashi
ngdi
shes.
"
Hey
."
"
Heyy
'al
l
.",
shegr
eet
sus.
Weal lr
ubhertummybef or
er unni
ngupstair
s.We
fi
ndhiml ayi
ngonhisbackwithhiseyesclosed.We
al
l f
indaplacetosi
tintheroom andheopenshi s
eyes.
"
Baf
o."
,Isaysl
appi
nghi
sknee.
Hesi
tsupandgr
oans.
"
Easyt
her
esol
dier
."
-Bheki
khay
a
"
Howy
ou'
vebeenhol
dingup?
",
Iaskconcer
ned.
"
Okay
.Andy
oual
l
?",
Langaasks.
"
We'
vebeen.
..okayIguess.
",
Ianswer
.
Wegr
owsi
l
ent
.
"
Sotel
lusDeathRider
.Whenar
eyouget
ti
ngt
o
wor
k?"
,Bheki
khay
a
"
AssoonasIcanmov
ear
oundwi
thoutpai
n."
,Langa.
"Dadhasbeencomplai
ningaboutthemi
nesnot
beingcheckedonandwe'r
ealwaysbusy
.",
Ifi
l
lhi
min.
"
I'
ll
beget
ti
ngbacksoon.Hopef
ull
y.
",
Langa
"
HasDadcomet
oseey
ou?
",
Bheki
khay
aasks.
"
No.Hi
sst
il
langr
yatme.
",
Langasay
ssadl
y.
"
He'
l
lcomear
ound.
",
Bheki
khay
a
"
Ithi
nkhi
snewgi
rlhashi
m byt
hebal
l
s."
,Isay
.
Theyl
aughandLangal
ooksatme.
"
Welltalki
ngaboutthi
smakesmegothroughthat
t
raumaagai nbutcausey
ou'
remybr
otherI'
ll
tel
l
y
ou."
,Itell
him.
Imov
eandsi
tnextt
ohi
m.
"SoIwenttoBabaspl acetoaskhi
m aboutafew
thi
ngsattheconstructi
on.Iwal
kinwit
hthat
BusinessGuruwalkandIhearmoans.Istopand
l
isten.Al
lI'
m hear
ingis"Fuckmeharder!
"Ngashay
a
i
360samet i
me."(
Iran.)
"
What
?SoBabai
sget
ti
ngi
t?"
,Langaasksl
aughi
ng.
"
Har
dbr
o.'
Ohy
ess!Ohy
esDaddy
!'"
Weal
ll
aughandUny
ezi
knocks.
"
Shoul
dIdi
shupf
ory
'al
l
?",
Uny
ezi
"
Yes.
",Iam t
hef
ir
stt
osay
.
Bheki
khay
alooksatme.
"
Didn'
tyoueatbef
orewecameher
e?"
,Bheki
khay
a
"
Thatwasanhourago.I
'
m hungr
ynow.
"
Heshakeshi
shead.
"
Met
oo.
",
Bheki
khay
asay
scausi
ngmet
olookathi
m.
"
Oho.Wer
en'
tyouonmycasesecondsago?
"
"
I'
m agr
ownmanKhul
ekani
.Ineedf
ood.
"
"
Ndabenkhul
u?"
,Bheki
say
swav
ingmeof
f.
Henodsandshewal
ksout
.
"
Uny
ezi
."
,Langacal
l
sout
.
Shet
urnsbackandl
ooksatLanga.
"
I'
m al
sohungr
y."
,het
ell
sher
.
Sheput
sherhandsonherwai
standhesmi
l
es.
Guesst
hey
'r
eongoodt
ermsagai
n.
"
Youat
eaf
ewmi
nut
esago.
",
Uny
ezi
"
Thatwasn'
tenough.
",
Langa
"
Yoh!Ni
yadl
ashame.
"(Y'
al
leat
.)
,Uny
ezi
Sheleavesusandwest
artbombar
dinghi
m wi
th
questi
ons.
"
Soy
'al
lokaynow?
",
mynoseyassasks.
"
Notenti
rely.Ist
il
lhav
etostar
tfr
om t
hebegi
nni
ng
wi
thhertrust.
",
hesayssof
tl
y.
"It
houghtshewasgonnaleav
eyour
ass."
,Bheki
khay
achi
mesin.
"Sheshoul
d'
ve.
",Ndabenkhul
usay
saf
terhi
sbeenso
quiet
.
"
Baf
o.You'
reokay
?",
Iaskhi
m.
"
Yeah.
",hesay
sdi
smi
ssi
vel
y.
"
Tal
k."
,Bheki
khay
aur
ges.
Hesi
ghsandr
ubshi
sface.
"
Whati
fI'
l
lnev
ermeetmyone?
",
Ndabenkhul
usay
s
def
eat
ed.
Weal
lkeepquietsincewe'
veall
foundt
hem.Wel
l
mi
nei
sinar el
ationshi
psoletmekeepqui
et.
"
Pat
iencebaf
o."
,Bheki
adv
ice'
s.
"Ihav
ebeenBheki
.It
sbeenwaytoolong.Whati
fI
am notmeantt
ofi
ndone?",
hesayst
iredl
y.
"
Youwil
l
.Youj
usthav
etowait.Lov
efi
ndsy
ounot
t
heot
herwayar
ound.
",
Itel
lhi
m.
Lookatmebei
ngt
hel
oveGur
u.Si
kes!
"
Itsur
eist
aki
ngi
tst
imewi
thme.
",
Ndabenkhul
u
"Ihaveaplantocheeryouup.Howaboutaf ami
l
y
dinner
.Welli
nvit
eKuhle,Noxol
o,Sanel
eand
Amanda.",
Isaysmili
ng.
"
AndSegot
oo.
",
Bheki
khay
aadds.
Il
ookatBheki
khay
aandcl
i
ckmyt
onguecausi
ng
hi
mtolaugh.
"Comeonbafo.You'
regi
vi
ngupalready?You
haven'
tev
enstart
ed.
",
Ndabenkhul
usays.
"
Sheseemst
olov
etheguy
."
"
Didshesayso?
",
Bheki
asks.
"
No.
"
"
Manj
e?"
,Langaal
sochi
mesi
n.
Ndabenkhul
usi
tsupandl
ooksatme.Br
other
ly
advi
cecomingup.
"Gir
lsl
ov eattenti
on.Beaconst antnuisancebutina
goodway .Buyherf l
owers.Takeherondat es.
Compl i
menther .Don'tandIam ser ious.Don't
!Be
sexualtowar dsher.Iknowy '
all
.Begent leandkind.
Treatherlikeafri
endandl etherf al
l i
nloveonher
own.Mosti mportantl
ydon'tstopdoi ngthiswhen
she'syours."
,hesaysser i
ously
.
Hesit
sbackandweall
lookathi
m.I'
m defi
nit
ely
sur
ethatwhenhemeet
shisdest
inedhe'
ll
treather
good.
"Actuall
yIjustnoti
cedIneverdidanyofthatwi
th
Uny ezi
.Ijustgaveherorgasms.Madehersmi l
ehere
andt hereandgav ehermymi l
li
onsmileandshelost
i
t."
,Langasay schuckli
ng.
Weal
ll
aughandhi
ghf
ive.Ndabenkhul
ushakeshi
s
head.
"
Y'al
lar
eyourf
ather
ssons.
",
Ndabenkhul
u
"
Wel lor
gasmsdomakewomenhappydon'
t
i
t?"
,Bheki
khay
a
"
Itdoesbutsexi
sov
err
ated.
",
Ndabenkhul
u
Wealll
ookathim andhemov eshischai
rcl
osert
o
us.Bef
orehecancarryont
alkingUnyezi
walksi
n.
"
Dinneri
sready
.",
shesay
ssmi
l
ing.
"
Wear
ecomi
ng.Thanky
ou.
",
Langa
Sheleav
esagai
nandwet
urnourat
tent
ionbackt
o
Mr'Sexisov
err
ated'
.
"
Okay
.Howwassexbef
oreUny
ezi
?",
heasksLanga.
Weal
ltur
ntol
ookatLangaandhej
ustshr
ugs.
"
Justsexman.
",
heanswer
s
"
Bheki
?",
Ndabenkhul
uaskshi
mtoo.
"
Idon'
tknowman.
",
Bheki
answer
sshr
uggi
ng.
"
Iwon'
tasky
ouK.
",
hesay
s.
Igi
vehi
m mymi
ddl
efi
ngerandhechuckl
es.
"Nowtell
meaboutt
hecur
rentsex.
"hesay
slooki
ng
atLanga.
"
Noman.I
'
m nott
ell
i
ngy
ouaboutmysexl
i
fe.
"
Weal
ll
augh.
"
I'
m notaski
ngf
ordet
ail
s."
,Ndabenkhul
u
"Okay.It
sgr eat
.Ital
way
sleav
esmef
ulf
il
led.Mani
ts
addict
ing."
,Langa
"
Yety
oucheat
ed?
",
Ndabenkhul
ubur
stst
hemood.
Hegi
veshi
mthe'
wtf
'lookandweal
lshr
ug.
"
Y'al
lsee?Sexwit
hsomeoney oulovei
sbeautif
ul.I
j
ustcan'
twaitf
orit
."
,Ndabenkhulucarr
ieson.
Hestandsupbrushi
nghi
shandsonhi
sjeansand
sl
apsLangasheadonhiswayout
.
"
Ouch!
",
Langa
Weall
standupandLangagrunt
shi
swayoutofbed.
Imi
ssedthesemomentswit
hmybrother
s.Theyj
ust
mademef eel
bet
ter
.
39
UNYEZI
"Whyareyouscar
edoft
ell
i
ngyourbrot
hers?You
sayhesawthemountai
nsiny
oureyes?"
,Iask
Thando.
"
I'
m deal
i
ngwithalotr
ightnow.Yes.Ican'
tbel
iev
eI
metmydest
inedthi
searly.
",
shesaysjoyf
ull
y.
"I
'm happyforyousthandwa.Whateveryou'
regoi
ng
thr
oughy ou'l
lcomethrough.Youalsocantel
lme
anythi
ng.Whenev eryoufeelr
eady
."
"
Iknow.Ij
ust
..
.Ineedt
ime.
",
shesay
ssof
tl
y.
Whati
sgoingonThando?Wesayourgoodby
esand
dr
opthecall
.
"
Wast
hatThando?
"
It
urnaroundatt
hesoundofLangasv
oiceandhe
smil
es.Heseemsbett
ertoday
.
"
Yes.Ar
eyouokay
?",
Iaskwor
ri
ed.
"
Yes.Ar
eyouokay
?",
heasksme.
"
Yes.I
'
m wor
ri
edaboutThandot
hou.
"
"Ihav
en'tt
alkedt
ohersi
ncet
heconf
ront
ati
on.
",
he
sayslooki
ngaway.
Iwonderhowl
ongishegoi
ngtowal
kar
oundwi
th
thi
sshameonhisshoul
der
s.
"
Y'al
lshoul
dcheckuponher.Y'
al
lal
way
sfor
gether
.
I
t'
sli
keshe'snotpar
tofy
'al
l
."
Hel
ooksatmeandr
ubshi
schi
nbef
oresi
tt
ingdown.
"
Webadbr
other
sar
en'
twe?
",
heasks.
"Yesy '
al
lare.Y'
allar
esocaughtupi ny ourbrot
herl
y
l
ov ey'al
lfor
gether.Alotofpeopledon'tevenknow
y'al
lhaveasi st
ercausey'
allcastheraside.
",
Isay
sitt
ingnexttohim.
Hebr
usheshi
sheadandsi
ghs.
"
I'
ll
lett
heguy
sknow.We'
l
ltal
ktoher
."
,
Inodandl
aymyheadonhi
sshoul
der
.
"
Canwecuddl
e?"
,Langa.
Inodandhelaysdownont hesofa.Il
ayont
opof
hi
m caref
ull
ywithouthur
tinghim.Itakei
nhi
saf
ter
shaveandcologneandsigh.
"
Theki
dsar
ecomi
ngbackSunday
.",
Itel
lhi
m.
HonestlyI'
vemi ssedthem butIneededsometi
me
alone.Wet alkonthephoneandLangai snott
aking
theseparationwell.
"
Theyknow?
",heaskswar
il
y.
"
No.Theyknowabouty
ouracci
dentonl
y.
"
Henodsandki
ssest
het
opofmyhead.
"
I'
m sor
ry.IknowIhur
tyou.
",heapol
ogi
ses.
"Wehavet
ofixwhat'
sbr oken.Wehavealongwayt
o
gobutwecandoit.
",Isayrubbinghi
shand.
Wel ayinsi
lenceineachother
sarmsandour
breathesi
nsy nc.We'
rerubbi
ngeachot
her
shands
absentmindedly.

KHULEKANI
Iknockonherdoorandsheshoutsf r
om t
heother
si
de.Iremovemy sel
ffr
om thewall
andstand
str
aight
.I'
m nott
ryi
ngtolookcocky.Sheopenst
he
doorsmili
ngandherexpressi
onchangesassoonas
sheseesme.Guessshe'
snotmuchofaf
an.
"
HeySeho.
",Igr
eetgi
vi
ngmybestsmi
l
e.
"Tshego.
",
shecor
rect
smei
rr
it
abl
y.
Ifeelmysmi l
ewav erasIgetpi
ssedandIfeel
my
eyetwitch.Cal
m downKhulekani
.Ipl
astert
hesmi
le
again.
"
Ican'
tpronounceyourname.Iboughtt
hesef
or
y
ou."
,Isayhandingherthef
lowers.
"
Whosai
dIl
i
kef
lower
s?Shoul
dIeatt
hem now?
"
It
akeadeepbr
eat
hinandr
unmyhandov
ermy
wavyhai
r.
"Sor
ry.Idi
dn'
tknowwhaty
oul
i
ke.
",
Isayascal
m asI
can.
"Thatscausewe'
renotf
ri
ends.
",shesay
swi
th
atti
tude.
Iroll
myneckandl ookupwi thmyeyesclosed.I
knewt aki
ngNdabenkhulusadvi
cewon'tdoitforme.
IfIstayher
ethenextfewmi nut
esI'
m goi
ngt ofuck
somemanner sint
oher .Il
ookatherandshe's
l
ookingatme.Iwal kawayandleaveherthere.It
urn
backar
oundandshe'
sst
andi
ngatt
hedoor
.
"Lalel
aNkosazana.I'
mj ustt
ryi
ngtobeni
ceand
si
ncey ounewar oundhereI'
mtryi
ngtobeyour
fr
iend.Theleastyoucandoismeetmehalfway.
",
I
saysternl
y.
Shel
ooksdownandIkeepmyey
esonher
.
"
I'
m sorr
y.Ithoughtyouhat
edmesincey
ouwere
v
eryrudelastti
me.",
shesaysav
oidi
ngeyecont
act
.
"
I'
m sorr
yforthat
.Iwasbei
nganasshol
e.Luncht
o
makeitupforyou?"
"
Idon'
tthi
nkt
hat
sagoodi
dea.Ihav
eaboy
fri
-"
"
I'
m notaski
ngforyourhandinmar
ri
ageher
e.Just
l
unchasfri
ends.
",
Icutheroff
.
"
Okay
.When?
",
sheaskssmi
l
ing.
Shehasabeaut i
ful
smileandthemostprett
iestl
i
ps.
Shedoesn'thavemakeupontodayandshei s
beauti
ful
.Inoti
ceascaronherforeheadandIwant
totouchitsobadbutIIhol
dmy self
.
"
Khul
i
?",
shedi
stur
bsmyt
hought
s.
"
Khul
ekani
.Khul
e."
,Icor
recther
.
Shej
ustshr
ugsandsmi
l
es.
"Getdressedsowecanl
eav
e.Act
ual
l
yyou'
ref
ine
l
ikethat
.Let'
sgo.
"
Shel
ooksatherout
fi
tandshakesherherhead.
"Noway!Letmewearsomet
hingl
essr
eveal
i
ng.
",
she
deni
es.
"
No.Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.You'
resaf
ewi
thme.
"
"
Butmyt
highs.Mycel
l
uli
te.No.
"
"
Idon'
tcar
e.Youhav
ebeaut
if
ult
highs.Let
'sgo.
"
Ipul
lherfr
om t
hedoorandsheshout
sforsomeone.
Agirl
peeksherheadoutt
hedoorasIpul
lherdown
thest
air
s.
"
Pleaset
urnof
fthest
ove!
",
sheshout
sout
.
Wegeti nt
omycarandwedr iveof
f.I'
mlooki
ng
str
aightaheadtostopmy sel
ffr
om l
ookingather
thi
ckashel l
thi
ghs."Don'
tbesexual
!"Ndabesvoi
ce
screamsinmyhead.Fuck!
"
Sowher
ear
egoi
ng?
",
sheasksdr
awi
ngmyat
tent
ion.
"
Tothet
axir
ank.
",
Ianswerl
ookingatherbef
ore
t
urni
ngmyatt
ent
ionbacktotheroad.
"
Taxi
rank?
"
"Yes.Theysel
lthebestt
ri
be.Thanwe'
ll
got
othe
parkandeat.Nothi
ngbig.
",
Isaysmi
li
ng.
"
ManIl
ovemogodu!
",sheexcl
aims.
"
Mogodu?
",Iask.
"
Yes.I
tst
ri
bei
nSeTswana.
"
"
Sot
ell
meabouty
ou.Yourdi
sli
kesandl
i
kes.
"
Ist
ealaglanceatherandheryel
l
owt
highs.Ir
egr
et
makingherleav
einthi
sshort.
"
I'
m TshegofatsoThango.21years.Doi
ngmyf
ir
st
y
earinHumanBehav iour
.Idon'tl
i
ke
l
i
es,r
udeness,hypocr
isyandanger.Il
ike
f
ood,music,
cars,
snakesandal otmore.
"
"Snakes?What
'
syourf
avour
it
esnake?
",
Iask
gri
nning.
"
Vinesnakes.
"
"
Shybutdeadl
y.They
'r
eal
sov
erybeaut
if
ul.Ver
yrar
e
t
osee.
"
"
Youknowv
inesnakes?
"
"
Yeah.Il
ovesnakes.IhadapetPyt
honti
lli
tgrew
l
argeandgavei
tupt otheNat
ional
ParkbutI'
m
t
racki
ngit
smov ements."
"
Wow.I
'
dli
ket
oseei
t.
",shesay
sexci
tedl
y.
"
I'
ll
checki
tsmov
ement
sandi
fit
scl
osebyI
'
llt
ake
y
ou."
Shesmilesandsqueals.She' ssuchagoodv ibe.
Getti
ngtoherwi l
lbefun.IthinkIloveheralr
eady .
Plusshelovessnakessoshe' stheperfectmat ch.I
l
ookatherasIpar knearMam' Thwalascontainer.
Shehast hemostbeautiful
f aceandIcant el
lshe's
al
sobeaut i
fulonthei
nsideaswel l
.

NOXOLO
Il
ookatSaneletalki
ngtoAmandaandt hey'
re
l
aughing.Heseemshappyandf r
eeagai
n.Myheart
achesatwhatIlethi
m gothrough.Hesavedmyli
fe.
Hesawhi smotherbeingbeatenandstr
angl
ed.
ThabangisbehindbarsandI
'm happybutIf
earthe
dayhegetsout.Ihavepeopl
ewhol ovemeright
hereandIappreci
ateit
.
"
Okay
.Comet
ast
ethi
s."
,Kuhl
edi
stur
bsme.
"
You'r
esoobsessedwithcooki
ngall
ofasudden.
Whatyoumake?Noodles?"
,Isayl
aughi
ngandshe
t
hrowsthedi
shtowelatme.
"Noman!ImadeChi
l
lichi
ckenbr
iyani
.Tast
e!"
,she
squeal
s.
Ohlor
dwhomadeherdiscoverIndi
andi
shes?We'
re
dyi
ngofMsKar
ishmahere!Itakeaspoonandput
someinmymouth.Icl
osemyey esandmoan.
"
Isi
tgood?
",
sheaskseager
ly.
Idon'
tanswerbutt
aket
hewhol
ebowl
andeat
.
"
Comeon!I
tsgood?
",sheur
ges.
Inodwithamout hful
.MrsSil
angwewould'
vebeen
soproudofherrightnow.She'
satherhappi
estand
I'
veneverseenherglowli
kethi
s.
"
Yes!I
'
mt aki
ngsomeforKhaya.I
'
m bri
ngi
nghim
l
unchsi
ncehesaidhe'
l
lbechecki
ngthebooksat
t
heof
fi
ce.
",
shesay
ski
ssi
ngmycheek.
Inodandcarryoneati
ng.Il
i
kehowKhay amakes
hersohappyandtogetoutofhercomfortzoneabi
t.
Hishelpi
ngunwrappart
sofherwe'venev
erknew
exi
sted.
Mom.
",Sanel
egr
insatme.
Isqui
ntmyey
esathi
m.Whatdoeshewant
?
"
Sanel
e?Whatnow?
"
"
CanwegomeetAmandasboy
fri
end?
",
hebegs.
"
Sanel
e!"
,Amandashout
s.
"
Ohherf
ri
end.
",
hef
ixeshi
sst
atement
.
"
Amandasboy
fri
endhuh?
",
Kuhl
easks.
"Hisjustaf
ri
end.Heisdat
ingAmahle."
,Amanda
saysandIcantellshel
i
keshim buthi
salready
taken.
"
I'
ll
dri
vey
'al
l
.Ineedsomeai
rany
way
s."
,Iv
olunt
eer
.
Istandupandgetmykeys.Iputonahoodieonl
y
andsneaker
sonandleav
ewi ththeki
dstext
ingt
his
'
fri
end'.
"Hesayshi
sathisunclesplaceinUmbilo.Hejust
gavemehisaddress.Healsohasal i
tt
lebrother
Sanel
esage.
",shesayspressingthecoordi
natesin.
Ijustnodanddr ivethem.Iam goingtopassbyt he
baker yaf
terthi
s.I'
ll
bakesomet hi
ngt otakehome
there.Umbiloisfortheri
chandhashi ghwalls
surroundi
ngpool sandglasshouses.Ihav emycar
searchedatt hegateandIsignin.Igetoutofthecar
andl ookatthishousethanatAmanda.
"
Yourfr
iendsuncleownsthi
s?"
,Iaskl
ooki
ngat
mysel
fattheglasswal
ls.
ShejustshrugsandSanel estar
tsgoingonabout
howhisgoingdr awhousesl i
kethese.Hewant sto
beanar chi
tectureandhisobsessi onstart
edwhen
wewat chedHGt vandhenev erlookedback.Two
boyscomeoutandt hetall
eronelooksv er
yfemini
ne
butyoucan'tmi ssthestrongjawlineandhis
masculineaura.They oungeronel ookscuteand
runstohugAmanda.Hel ooksatSaneleandhugs
himtoo.Hisahugger .
"
Heysi
si.
",hegr
eet
sme.
"
Sisi
?Cal
lmeAunt
y."
,Il
augh.
Hesmi
lesandhugsmet
oobef
orepul
l
ingSanel
e
wi
thhi
minside.
"SawubonaAunty.I
'
m Nkosi
nat
hiKhuzwayo.I
promiseyourni
eceissaf
einmyhands."
,hesays
seri
ously
.
HisaseriousyoungmanIsee.IlookatAmandaand
hercheeksarered.'
Hisj
ustafr
iends.
'Shewant
s
hi
ml o.
"
Okayf
ana.I
syouruncl
ein?
"
"Yes.Heisinhisst
udy
.Icant
akey
out
ohi
m."
,he
saysrespecti
vel
y.
Iwanttomeetthesekidsmother.They'
rerai
sedwell.
Weent ert
hehouseandheof f
ersmeadr i
nkwhi chI
decl
ine.Manner
s.Thishouseisbeauti
fulandIfeel
l
ikeI'
m outofpl
ace.Heknocksinthedoorandi t
opensautomati
cal
ly.
"
Therehei
s.We'
l
lbedownst
air
sAunt
y."
,hesay
sand
l
eaves.
Iwal
kint
othest
udyandt
hemani
swr
it
ing
somet hi
ngdownandnotpay
ingat
tent
iont
omy
presence.
"
Sor
rysi
r.
",IsayandIcl
earmyt
hroat
.
Her aisesapalm si
gnali
ngformet ogivehi m asec.
Whenhi sdonehesitsupandIseehisni cepsf lex.I
j
ustcameupwi t
hawor d.Ni
cebiceps.Ni ceps.Hi s
Adamsappl ebobsasheswal l
owsandIhav ea
sil
entf r
eakmoment .Hehasdarklipsandhel icks
them causingdimplestofor
m andIfeelanor gasm
comi ngup.Hehasast rongjawl
inethatcanbr eak
anacor n.ImeethiseyesandIclosemyey esqui ckly
.
"
Shi
t!
",
Icussr
ubbi
ngmyey
es.
"Nkosazana.Khonai
nki
nga?
"(i
sther
eani
ssue?
),he
asksstandingup.
"Youreyes.They
'r
ebright
.ManIt
hinkIwi
l
lbebl
i
nd.
",
Isawithmyey essti
l
lclosed.
"
Openy
ourey
es.
",Ihearhi
svoi
cenearmyear
.
HeputsawarmlargehandonmybackandIsi
gh.
Hi
stouch.I
tssorefr
eshi
ng.
"
Openy
ourey
es.
",hesay
ssof
tl
yandhi
sbr
eat
hehi
s
myneck.
Iopenthem slowl
yandIrubthem.Il
ookathi
m and
thebr
ightnessdoesn'
taf
fectmyeyes.
"
Afuckenangel
."
,It
hinkoutl
oud.
Hechuckl
esandIl
ookdownshy
ly.
"No.Don'
tbeashamed.I
'
lltakei
tasa
compli
ment.
",
hesayssmil
ing.
Hi
sfaci
alf
eat
uresl
ookf
ami
l
iar
.
"
Ndabenkhul
uKhuzway
o."
,hei
ntr
oduceshi
msel
f.
"Noxol
oKhumal
o."
Weshakehandsandanelect
rical
for
cehit
susand
wepul
lback.Hesmil
esatthatandIseehi
seyes
shi
mmerwithtear
s.
"
CanIhugy
ou?
",heasks.
"
Uhokay
.",
Iagr
eewei
rdedout
.
Hetakesmei nt
ohisar
msandhegi v
esthebest
hugs.Hi
slikeahumansizedt
eddybear
.Hischest
emitswarmthandIsi
ghsmell
inghi
m.Ipullaway
andhisfavefal
l
s.
"I
'
dli
ketoleav
emynumber s.Il
eftmyni
eceandson
downst
air
s.Pleasedocal
lmewhentheywantt
o
l
eave.
"
"
YesNoxol
o."
Iwritedownmynumber sont hepaperonhi sdesk
andbi dgoodby e.Igeti ntomycaranddr i
veof f
.
May behehasaspaci al eyeconditi
ont hatmakeshi s
eyeslookl i
kethesunt hani tsabeaut i
fulconditi
on.
Helooksf amili
arthou.Li keKhulekani and
Bhekikhaya.I'
l
l askKuhl ef orthesurname.Hesai d
hewasaKhuzway o.Ishakemyhead.Focuson
yourselfNoxolo.Mybr aindoesntl i
stenasi tkeeps
play
ingt hewhol eordeal overandov eragain.
40
THANDOLWETHU
Ilookatmynewt attooont hemi rr
orandsmi le.I
hav en'tbeenhomeandIt hinkt heybet terof fwi thout.
Iwal koutoft hetatt oopar lourandwal kdownt he
streetpl ayingwi t
hmyt onguepi erci
ng.Iwal kint o
thecaf énearandor dercof fee.Isitdownsi ppingmy
coffeeandl ookout sidet hewi ndow.Idi dn'tget
muchsl eepl astnightl i
ket heot hernight s.Ishoul d
beusedt oitbynowbutt hebagsundermyey es
don' tgounnot i
ced.Iseest udent swalki ngt o
campusandIf oll
owt hei rfoot steps.I'
mj ustanot her
girlatcampus.Myf ami lyist hemostr ichestbut
nobodyknowsI '
m par toft hem andi t
sokay .My
brother sar eal way soncov erpageswi tht heirnames
onev erygirlsl i
ps.Ipul lmyhoodi eovermyheadand
wal kintocampus.Isi tdownont hefi
r stseatIcan
fi
ndandl i
st ent othepr of essorgoonaboutmet hods
tohel psui cidal patient s.
Iwalkoutofschoolwit
hitchyey
esandthetir
edness
weighi
ngheavil
yonmyshoul der
s.Iseehi
m again
todaypar
kedacrosstheroadandIstar
twalki
ng
towardshi
m.WhenI '
m afewmet r
esawaySet hu
walkstowardshi
m andtheykiss.Ifeelmyheart
breakandIholdbackt
het ear
s.Heseesmeand
walkstowardsmewhenSet huisint hecar
.Hegr i
ps
myhandr oughl
yandduet omyhi ghpaintoler
anceI
don'tf
eelmuch.Hehaswar m hands.
"Li
stenher e.Whathappenedt hatdaywasami st
ake.
Forgetaboutt hatkissyouli
tt
lefreak.Idon'tknow
whatswi thy ourey esbutther
eisnot hingspecial
abouty ou.St opfollowi
ngmear ound. "
, hesays
angril
y.
"
Iwasn'
tfol
l
owi
ngy
ouar
ound.
"
"
Idon'
tcar
e!"
,hel
ooksar
oundbef
orel
ower
inghi
s
v
oice.
"Younotmyty
peoftea.Youwon'tf
il
lmypocket
s.
Leavehoodgi
rl
."
,hesayspushi
ngmeaway.
Il
ookathi
m andsqueezehi
scheeki
nmyhand.
"
We'
l
lmeetagai
n.St
hembi
soMt
het
hwa.
"
Il
etgoofhi
scheekleavi
ngitr
edandwalkaway
l
eavi
nghim sur
pri
sed.AssoonasIgeti
ntomy
apar t
mentIsl idedownandcr y.I
'vebeenar ej
ect
mostofmyl if
ebutt hiswashar dtotake.Hel ived
offrichwomanandhei nstantlysawt hatIcouldn' t
afford.Ihav eallthemoneyi nt hewor ld!Icanaf ford
him!JustcauseIdon' tf
launtitdoesn'tmeanIcan' t
hav etheoneper sonmeantf orme!It hrowt hev ase
nearagai nstthewal landscr eam.Idisconnectt he
TVandt hrowi tacrossther oom.Ipul lmyhai rand
scream.Scenar i
ospl ayinmyheadandIl augh.No
onewi llhavey ouSt hembisoi fIdon'
t!Noone!No
onewant sme!Myphoner i
ngsandIl ookati t
.'Bhuti
Langa. '
Iwi pemyt earsandanswert hecal l
.
"
Bhut
i.
",Imanaget
omast
ert
hesof
testv
oice.
Maket
hem bel
i
evey
ou'
renor
mal
.
"Howar
eyou?Unyezi
tol
dmey
ouwer
en'
tokay
.",
he
sayswi
thwor
ry.
Soifshehadn'
ttol
dyout
hany
ouwoul
dn'
thav
e
cal
l
ed.Typical
.
"
I'
m okay
.Ihadf
lubuti
tscomi
ngal
ri
ght
."
"
Okay
.We'
recomi
ngt
oseey
ou.
",Langa.
Shi
t!
"
Okay
."
Ilookar oundt heapar tmentandt hemessi s
cleanabl e.Istar tpickinguppiecescut t
ingmyhands.
IcleanasbestIcoul dbutIcan'texplai
nt hemi ssi
ng
TV.I '
llcomeupwi t
hal i
e.Ial
way sdo.Ichangei nto
anot herhoodi eandswagpant shi di
ngmyt attoos.
Whatel se?Ir unupst air
sandhi demypi l
l
si nsidemy
speakerandr unbackt otheli
vi
ngr oom andsi ton
thecouchwi thaf l
eeceandt akeaf ewdeep
breat hes.Ihav en'tt akenmypi l
lsinday s.I'
l
l manage
withoutt hem.Ij usthav etokeepupt hesweethappy
sisteract .Iknowhowt omanipulatesoI '
m not
wor ri
edaboutt hem ev erknowingt hereal me.

NOXOLO
Iwakeupwithathr
ustandlookar
oundtheroom.I
ts
j
ustadream Noxol
o.Nothi
ngbutadream.Hewon'
t
hur
tyou.
"
Arey
ouokay
?",
Kuhl
easksy
awni
ng.
"
Yeah.Justhadanot
herni
ght
mar
e."
"
It
shi
m agai
n?"
,shesi
tsup.
"Yes.Heki
l
ledmethi
sti
mearound.Thecopsdidn'
t
come.Nobodycame.Heki
l
ledme.",
IsayasIfeel
mychestclosi
ngup.
I
tfeel
srealasmymindpl
aysscenari
osinmyhead.
Hehashiskneeonmychestandhisshout
ing.
"
I'
ll
kil
lyou!Youmakemeangr
y!"
,t
hev
oicer
epeat
sin
myhead.
Ifeel
handssnakear
oundmeandIj
umpoutofbed.
Inoti
cei
tsKuhle.
"
I'
m sor
ryKuhl
e."
"
No.I
tsnoty
ourf
aul
t.Br
eat
he.
",
shesay
ssoot
hingl
y.
It
akedeepbr
eat
hs.
"
Hisnother
etohur
tyou.
",shecar
ri
esoncal
ming
me.
Isi
tonthebedasmybr eat
hgetsbacktonormal.I
l
etoutawretchedsobandshepull
smei nherar
ms.
She'
slosi
ngsleepoverme.Inev
erknewI'
dreach
thi
sstageinmyl i
fe.Ihadmyli
fepl
annedoutsowel
l
.
Guesseveryt
hingbreakswhenyouaretheone
bui
ldi
ngitanditsnotGod.
NDABENKHULU
Igetoutt
hecarreadytotel
lThandoandtheguys
goodnews.Wewal kinherapar
tmentandshe'
s
sl
eepingont
hecouch.ThereisnoTV.Langashakes
herandshewakesup.
"
Heyy
'al
l
.",
shey
awnsout
.
Inot
iceat
onguer
ing.That
snew.
"
Heysl
eepyhead.
",
Igr
eether
.
ShesneezesandIpasshertheti
ssuebox.Wesi
t
andInoti
cethebagsunderhereyes.Whensher
ubs
herey
esInoticescr
atchesonherhands.
"
Youhav
eat
onguepi
erci
ng?
",
Bheki
khay
aasks.
Guessheal
sonot
iced.
"
Yes.Justwant
edt
otr
ysomet
hingnew.
",shesay
s
l
ooki
ngdown.
"
What
'supwi
tht
hescr
atchesony
ourhands?
",Iask
her
.
"
MyTVf el
landbroke.Icl
eanedi
tupandscr
atched
myhands.Iguessi
twasn'tst
abl
e."
Il
ookatherandshedoesn'
tseem alr
ight
.Shekeeps
cl
enchi
ngherfi
stsandheremotionsareshi
ft
ing.
She'
shidi
ngangerandshe'
str
yingtohardthatshe
doesn'
tseet
hatshe'
sfai
li
ng.
"Iknowwehav en'
tbeenthebestbr
other
s.Alway
s
excludingyou.Youdon'thav
etofeelal
one.We
here."
,Langa.
Shelaughsandherli
ptwit
chesandshecl
enchesher
fi
ststi
ghter
.Somethi
ngisn'
tri
ghther
e.
"
Thando?Am Imaki
ngaj
oke?
",Langaasks.
Hispushingwhateverangershehasandi t'snot
good.I'
veneverseenherli
ket hi
s.She'
sal way sbeen
thequietandisol
atedoneinthebunch.Theguy s
don'tseem t
onoticethi
schangeofat ti
tude.I'
m
mor eofanobserverandthanactaftersoIj ustsi
t
quietl
ylooki
ngatherandwat chi
nghermov ement s.
"
We'
rehav
ingdi
nnerSundayatKhul
ekani
shouse.
Howabouty
oucome?
",
Bheki
khay
a.
Hepissesherof
fandshebitesherl ipsandInotice
bl
oodandshel i
cksitawayquickly.Howist heguys
notseethi
schangeofbehavior.Shescratchesher
headandherhoodiegoesupr eveali
ngat at
too.
"
Thando.I
sthatatat
too?
",Khul
ekaniasksi
nchi
ng
t
owardswit
hhishandstr
etchedout.
"Don'
ttouchmeBhuti
."
,herv
oicecomesoutr
ough
andheget st
hemessageandretr
eat
s.
Thisi
snottheThandolwet
huIknow.Isitupand
l
ookathertil
lshel
ooksmei ntheeye.Somethi
ngis
cl
awingathersoulandbyherbehav
iorIcantel
lit
s
beeneat
ingatherforawhi
le.
"
Thando.What sgoingonwi
thy
ou?Idontknowy
ou
l
i
kethis.
",If
inal
lyspeak.
"Y'
al
ldon'tknowme.Y'
alldon'
twantme!Nobody
does!
",shescreamsst
andingupandwealldotoo.
We'r
esoconfusedandshockedrightnow.She
st
andsi
nfrontofmeandheav es.Ilookint
oher
ey
esandthey'
reemoti
onless.Somet hi
ngiswrong.I
needt
ocal
lKhuzway
o.
"You.Bi
gbr
other
.Whatcour
seam Idoi
ng?
",she
asksme.
"
Nur
sing?
",Iaskunsur
e.
Shemov
est
oLanga.
"
What
'smyf
avour
it
ecol
our
?",
Thando
"
Grey
.",
heanswer
s.
Shemov
est
oBheki
khay
a.
"Secondbor
nkaBaba.What
'smyf
ear
?",
Thando.
"
Spi
der
s."
,heanswer
sconf
ident
ly.
Shemovest
oKhul
ekani
andInot
iceanemot
ion.
Hope.
"
Zal
o.What
'smydeepestsecr
et?
",Thando.
Theymaintai
neyecontactandKhul
ekanil
ooksatus
andshakeshishead.Whatsgoi
ngonhere?Thando
nodsathim andhesit
sdownandcov er
shisface.
"
YouhaveBi
pol
ar.Onl
ymamaknewabouti
tand
whenshedi
edshetol
dme.Youf
eel
li
keyou'
rel
i
ving
underourshadowandy ougrowoutofshale
becauseyou'
refi
ghti
ngtogetsunli
ghtbutwei nt
he
way."
,hesaysandhel et
'soutadeepbreat
hlikea
weighthasbeenoff
loaded.
Hel
ooksatusandshakeshi
shead.
"She'
sdoingherf inalyearinPsy chol
ogycauseshe
wantstohelpwi thment alil
lnesses.Herfavouri
te
colouri
sblackcauseshef indspeacei nthedark.
Herworstfeari sdyingalonecauset hatshowshe
alwaysfel
tlike.She'snottheThandoy '
allknow.
",he
saysandwi pesast randtear .
Howcantheykeepsuchasecr
etf
rom us?Ar
ewe
r
eal
lyt
hatignor
ant?
"Wherei
sy ourmedi
cine?
",Khul
ekani
asksherasshe
star
tscr
ying.
"
Myhi
deout
."
,sheanswer
slaughi
ng.
Weal lstandtherel
ooki
ngatherandprocessing
everyt
hing.Howdi dImissthi
s?HowdidKhuzway o
missthis?Ilookatmybr ot
hersandwelook
defeat
ed.I fshamecoul
dsmel lt
hisnei
ghborhood
wouldst i
nk.
41
MONTHSLATER
NDABENKHULU
Wesignherf ormsandBheki khayahelpsherwit
h
herbagswhileKhulekanihel
psherinsidethecar.
Langadri
vesof fandwesi t
ti
ngi nsi
lence.She
seemsbetterthanthelastti
mewesawher .
"
Arey
ouokay
?",
Bheki
khay
afi
nal
l
yasks.
Shel ooksathi m andnodssmi li
ng.Imi ssedher
smile.Ithoughtshehadl ost.WhenKhuzway ofound
outaboutThandossi tuati
onhewentcr azy.Hespent
aweekatt hev i
ll
ageandt heysaidhe' dspendday s
shout i
ngatmymom.Ourf amilysplitupandi fi
t
wasntf orUny eziwe' dbel ostbeings.Wet ook
Thandot oapsy chiatri
chospi talandwev i
sitedhere
andt here.Thef i
rstfewmont hswi t
houtherwer e
hard.Uny eziwassadshewasntt herewhenshe
gavebi r
tht oNkany ezi.Littl
eNkany eziboughta
dif
ferentjoyintoourl ives.Ithinkwhatki l
ledusmor e
wassi tt
ingaroundt hedinnnert ableonChr i
stmas
andshewasn' tthere.Shewasdi schar gedt odayand
wehavebeenplanni
ngformont hshowt
ogetto
knowherbet
terandKhulekani
hasbeenhel
pingus.
"
You'
rer
eadytomeetyournephew?We'l
lgooutf
or
l
unchaf
tert
hat
."
,Langasaysparki
ng.
"I
'
mr eady.Canwepost pone.Ihav
esomet
hingt
o
deal
wi t
hlater
."
,Thando
"
Somet
hingt
odeal
wit
h?What
'st
hat
?",
Iaskher
.
"
Don'
twor
ryabouti
t.
",shesmi
l
es.
We'regoi
nggofi
ndoutany
way.Wegetoutoft
he
carandwalki
nsi
de.Uny
ezii
spl
ayi
ngwit
hNkanyezi
.
"
Ohheyguy
s.Thando?
",sheget
sal
lemot
ional
.
Nkosi
nat
hitakesthechi
l
dandUnyezihugsThando.
Sheki
sseshercheeksandt
heyst
artcryi
ng.Women.
"Imissedy
ou.CanIseehi
m?"
,Thandoaskssmi
l
ing
betweenhercr
ies.
"
Yeah.OhmyGod!Ican'
tbel
i
evei
tsy
ou.
",Uny
ezi
Thandotakesthekidandsmileski
ssi
nghischeeks.
Nkanyezii
saKhuzway obaby.Thedimplesnever
goi
ngunnot i
ced.Langasmi
lesandkissesUnyezi
.
NOXOLO
"
Sanel
e!"
,Ishoutathi
m.
Hel
aughsandrunsar
oundourapar
tment
.Hi
ssuch
apl
ayf
ulchi
ld.
"
Sanel
egi
vemet
hatphone!
",Ishoutchasi
nghi
m.
Hel
aughsandashescr
oll
sonmyphone.
"
Ha!Iknewi
t!
",hesay
ssmi
l
ing.
Isnat
chmyphoneandputi
tinsi
demypocket
.
"
Uyaphapha!
"(You'
ref
orwar
d.)
,Isaysmi
l
ing
i
nvol
untar
y.
"
Oksalayo.Ican'tbel
i
eveyouar
estal
ki
ngMal
ume
Ndabenkhulu.
",hesaysl
aughi
ng.
"
I'
m not
.I.
..
I.
..
Nje.
",Ist
utt
er.
"
Wer
en'ty
out heonesay
ingy
oudon'
tli
kehim?That
y
ounotgoingtodat
eaKhuzway
o."
,Sanel
e
"
Howol
dar
eyouagai
n?"
,Iasksar
cast
ical
l
y.
"
Haha.I
'
m ol
denought
oknowt
hatf
eari
seat
ingat
y
ou.Notev
erymani
sli
kedad.
",Sanel
e
Heki ssesmyhandandwal kstohi
sr oom.Ist
and
therereali
singhowtruehi
swordsare.Thedoorbel
l
ri
ngs.Isignf ort
hefl
owersandUberEatsbrownbag.
Ireadt henoteandIsmil
e.
"Forgi
veness(Noxolo).Pleasefor
giveasIwon'
t
makei tt
odi nnerasIpr omised.I
'
m at t
endi
nga
familymatter.Iboughtlunchthou.Fist
bumpmy
niggaforme.Ndabenkhul u.
"
Ismel
lthefl
owersandputt
hem i
nt hev ase.I
'm
usedt
ot hefl
ower
s.Hehasthem deli
veredev er
y
morni
ng.Iopenupthebagandi
tsChi ckenLicken.
"
Sanel
e!"
,Ical
lforhi
m.
"
What
'sup?
",heaskst
aki
ngapi
ece.
"
Ndabenkhul
usay
s..
."
,If
ist
bumphi
m.
"
Heboughtl
unch?
",
heaskssmi
l
ing.
Inodandtakeoutmyphonet
hanki
nghi
mforl
unch
andthef
lowers.
"
Doy
out
hinky
ou'
l
lev
ermov
eon?
",Sanel
easks.
Ijustshr ugandweeatt al
king.Hi
sbeenagr eatson.
We' remor eofbestfr
iends.I'
mjustnotr eadyfora
relati
onshi pandhel i
kesNdabenkhul ubutI'm
wor kingonbui ldi
ngmybusi ness.May beast i
me
goesI '
l
l confr
ontmyf eeli
ngsbutri
ghtnow.Meand
Ndabenkhul uwi l
lj
ustbewhatwear e.Hisnever
madeamov eonme.Hehasnev eraskedmeout .
I'
m cer tainhejustseesmeasanacqui t
tance.

UNYEZI
Weleftev
eryoneint
heloungeastheycel
ebr
ate
Thandosret
urn.I
'
m sohappytoseeher.
"
I'
mleav
ingwi
thy
ou.
",Langa
"
Ineedt
odot
hisonmyown.
",Isayshaki
ngmyhead.
"Youst
il
lhav
eamonthtothinkaboutt
his.Younot
goingt
oSwazil
andal
one.
",Langa
"
Iwon'
tbeal
one.Myuncl
esanddadwi
l
lbet
her
e."
,I
t
rymaki
nghi
m seeI
'l
lbesaf
e.
"Ican'
tlosey
ou.
",heshakeshi
sbeadwi
tht
ear
sin
hiseyes.
Heki ssesmeandi tsslowandpassi onate.Nkanyezi
i
sdownst ai
rswitht herestsowehav ethi
smoment
withoutdistur
bance.Hecl i
mbsont opofmeand
kissesmeagai n.Hi shandspul lonmypant sandI
l
iftmybut tupandher emov esit.Wegobackgo
kissingasher ubsmycl i
t.I
'm al
readywetandhi s
takinghisti
mewi t
hme.Hebet t
ermaket hisqui
ck
befor eNkanyezistart
scr yi
ng.
Herubshi
mselfonmebef
oreheent
erssl
owl
yandI
moan.Hethr
ustssl
owl
yandIar
chmyback.
"
MmmhLanga.
",Imoanout
.
Hei
sgoi
ngsl
owandt
hepassi
oni
stoomuch.
"
Youcan'tl
eav
ealone.
",hegr
oansi
nmyear
t
hrust
ingsl
owly.
Sohi
st r
yingt
omakemeagr
eebyf
ucki
ngme?I
fyes
i
tsworki
ng.
"
I'
mleav
ingwi
thy
ou.
",
hewhi
sper
s.
Hecir
cul
ateshi
swai
standIlosei
t.Igr
ipthesheet
s
ti
ght
erandheli
ft
smyT-shi
rtupandgrazesmy
ni
ppl
e.
"Ah!
",
Imoanl
oudl
y.
"
I'
mleav
ingwi
thy
ou.
",
hewhi
sper
s.
"
Yes!Yes!Yes!
",Iagr
eemoani
ngsof
tl
y.
Heholdsmeinhisar
msandt hr
ustsslowl
ywhil
eI'
m
moani
nghisname.Icanfeel
him pul
sati
nginmeas
hest
rokesdeepandslow.
"
Ah!Langa!
"
Mywet
nessi
sdri
ppi
ngandhi
ssl
owst
rokesar
e
t
aki
ngmeonedge.
"
Langa!
",Imoangr
ippi
nghi
mti
ght
erandcl
enchi
ng
mythi
ghs.
"
Cum f
orme.
",hegr
oanski
ssi
ngmyneck.
Idi
gmynail
sdeeperi nt
ohisbackasIarchmyback
wit
hmymouthcl osed.Themostint
enseorgasm
hi
tsmeandI'
ml eftshaki
ngunderhi
m.Hecumson
mythi
ghandgroansout .
"
Shi
t!
"
Herol
lsofmeandpull
smeint
ohisarms.Het
hrows
afl
eeceoverusandIl
ayonhi
schest
.Justaf
ew
minut
esbef
orewegodownt oothers.We'
vemade
t
hebestofourl
oveandIl
ovehim dail
y.

KUHLEKONKE
Il
ookatt hiski
dwithmymout hopenanddry.She'
s
l
ookingdownandcr ying.Igetoutofshockandhold
hercloselyasshecri
esinmyar ms.Aknock
di
sturbsusandIat t
endt oit
.Iopenandits
Nkosinathi.
"
SawubonaSi
si.
",hegr
eet
s.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
"
CanIseeAmanda?
",hesay
slooki
ngmest
rai
ghti
n
t
heeyes.
"It
hinkyou'
vebr
okenherheartenough.You'
vemade
i
tclearyoudon'
tval
ueher
.",
Isayclosingthedoor
behindme.
We'restandi
ngoutsi
deandhehasonehandi nhi
s
pocketandtheotheri
shol
dingadi
s-chem paper
bag.
"
Whathappenedbet
weenmeandAmandawasa
mistake.Ididn'
tforceherint
oany t
hinginsteadshe
wast heonewhoaskedmet obr eakherv irgi
nit
y
becauseIwast heonlyguyshet rusted.Amandai sa
greatgir
lsisibutwithyoubeingwi thmyuncl ewe
couldneverbeany thingmoret hanfriends.I'
m also
i
nar elati
onship.Pleaseunderstand.Givetheset o
herplease.Tellherim sor
ryfornotlov i
ngher .
",he
handsmet hepaperbagandl eav es.
WhenIwas16Iwaswor riedaboutwhatcolour
dresswasIgoingtowear.AboAmandaal ready
havevi
rgi
nbreakers.I
'
m notjudgi
ng.Sheknows
whatshe'
sdoing.Igetbackinsi
deandshe'ssti
ll
cryi
ng.
"Nkosi
nat
hidr
oppedt
hisof
f.
",Isayhandi
nghert
he
bag.
Shewipeshertear
sandpeeksi
nsi
de.Inot
ice
morni
ngpil
ls.
"
Didy
'al
lusepr
otect
ion?
",Iaskf
rowni
ng.
SheshakesherheadandIsl
apher
.
"
Amanda!HaveInevert
oldy
oupr
event
ioni
sbet
ter
t
hancur
e?!
",Ishout
.
"
Itwas.
..Wewer
ebot
hint
hemoment
."
,shecr
ies.
"
Youdidn'
tev
enment
iont
his?Yazi
ni!
",It
urnar
ound
t
oleav
e.
"Ohandhesaidhi
ssor
ryf
ornotl
ovi
ngy
ou.
",Isay
andthanl
eave.
ThewholeKhuzwayocl
anjustboughtdr
ama.Icl
i
ck
mytongueandcall
Bheki
khaya.

TSHEGOFATSO
"
You'
vebeenpost
poni
ngv
isi
ti
ngmeTshepo.
"
"
Iknow.I
'
vebeenbusyTshego.
",
hel
i
es.
Somet
hingf
all
sont
heot
hersi
de.
"
What
'st
hat
?",
Iask.
"Babe!What'
sgoingonther
e?!
",af
emal
evoi
ce
shoutsontheothersi
de.
"Babe?Hebanna!KemangouTshepo?
"(who'
sthat
Tshepo?)
Hedoesn'
tanswermebutdr
opst
hecal
l
.Il
ookat
myphonescreenamazed.Therei
snowayhi
s
cheat
ing.May
beitwastheTV.Whoam If
ool
ing?I
cal
lhi
m andhedropsmycall.
42
BHEKI
KHAYA
Ij
ustgotoffthephonewi t
hKuhlekonkeandshei s
bi
ti
ngmybeadof fasifIsentNkosinathitobr eak
Amandasv i
rgini
ty.Iwal
kbacktot heloungeand
UnyeziandLangacomeback.It akeNkany ezifrom
Thandoandt i
ckl
ehi m.Bafohasthecut estkid.
Nkosinat
hiwalksinbangsthedoor .Weal llookat
hi
m.
"Nkosi
nat
hit
hevi
rgi
nbr
eaker
."
,Isaycausi
ng
every
onetol
ookatme.
Hewal kspastusandcl
imbsthestair
s.Langa
standsuptofoll
owhim andUnyezipusheshi
m back
down.
"
Vir
ginbr
eaker
?",
Ndabenkhul
uasks.
"
Yes.Hesl
eptwi
thAmanda.
",It
ell
him pl
ayi
ngwi
th
Nkany
ezi
.
"Ah!Nazokemf ana!
"(Ther
ewegoboy
),Khul
ekani
shoutslaughi
ng.
"
Sowhyi
sheangr
y?"
,Thandoasks.
"Hedoesn'
twantAmanda.Theydi dn'
tuseprot
ect
ion.
Heevenboughthermor ni
ngafter
s.Idon'
tgetwhy
hist
heangryone.
",Isayshruggi
ng.
Khul
ekani
laughsandThandosl
apshi
shead.
"
Ouch!
",hegr
unt
s.
"Shutup!Thisisser
ious.Doesn'
thehav
ea
gir
lf
riend?
",Thandoasks.
"Hei
sdati
ngagi
rlcall
edAmahle.Amandasf
ri
end.
Yeyi
i
!It
samess.
",Itel
lthem.
"
Langa!
",Langacal
l
sforLangal
ami
.
Hecomesi
nwi
thUny
ezi
sphonei
nhi
shands.
"
Gocal
lyourbr
otherf
orme.
",Langai
nst
ruct
s.
Theboyrunsupst ai
rsandKhulekanikeepson
sayi
ng"vi
rginbreaker?ye16years?Your ai
seda
Casanov
abaf o.
"andl aughi
ng.Hewal ksinandsi
ts
nextt
oUny ezi
.Protecti
on.Smartmov e.
"
Youdor eal
isey
ouhavet
opaydamager
ight
?",
Ndabenkhul
uaskshi
m.
Henodswi
thhi
sey
escast
eddown.We'
veal
lbeen
i
nhi
ssi
tuat
ionandt
heheati
sepi
c.
"
Soy ouwon'
tgett
hreemont
hsal
l
owance.
",Langa
t
ell
shim.
"KodwaBabasheaskedfori
t.Idi
dn'
tevenmakea
mov eonher
."
,herai
seshisv
oiceandLangapul
ls
him byhi
sneck.
"
Don'tr
aiseyouvoi
ceatme.Youpenetr
atedher
r
ight
?Soy ou'
repay
ing!
",hesay
sfi
rmly
.
Khul
ekanii
sinst
it
chesandhekeepsget
ti
ngsl
aps
fr
om Thando.Mybrot
heri
sanidi
ot.
"Sot
ell
memshana.Howwasi
t?"
,Khul
ekani
asks
him.
"Shesnott
hefi
rstgir
lI'
vet
aint
edMal umesoi
ts
nothi
ngtobeexcit
edabout.
",Nkosi
nathi
mumbles.
Ndabenkhul
ucr
acksupandhef
ist
bumpshi
m.
"
Howmanyhav
eyousl
eptwi
th?
",Thandoasks.
"
Justt
woaunt
y."
,hemumbl
es.
"
Vir
gins?
",Iaskandhenods.
"
Great
.6mont
hswi
thoutal
l
owance.We'
repay
ingt
o
bot
hthesegi
rl
s."
,Langabur
stsourbubbl
e.
Nkosinathil
ooksathi
m andtr
iesbegginghi
sfather
butLangadoesn'tbuyi
t.Wel
lwe'veal
lhadbeen
here.I
'm sur
eLangaishappythathecanputthe
samepr essureonsomeoneel
se.
"
Mama.
",hesay
slooki
ngatUny
ezi
.
"
Sor
ryboy
.",
sheshr
ugs.
Hestandsupandleav
esandassoonashi
soutof
si
ghtwealll
augh.
"Manthatfel
tgood.RememberwhenDaddi dt
hatt
o
his?Manitwastort
ure.
",Langasay
slaughi
ng.
"Doy our
ememberhoweveryy
earBhekikhayawas
brokecauseheal
waysdat
edvir
gins.
",Khul
ekani
remindsthem.
"
Theydatedme.Nottheotherwayar
ound.Theyj
ust
l
ovethi
s."
,Isayandwelaugh.
"
I'
m wai
ti
ngf
orthedayThandobr
eaksherv
irgini
ty.
Wewant15cows!
",Khul
ekani
say
sandweal lagree.
ThandocoughsandUny
ezi
laughs.
"Yi
niThando?
"(what
'
swr
ongThando?
),Ndabenkhul
u
asks.
"Nothi
ng.
",shesay
sst
andi
ngupandgoi
ngi
ntot
he
kit
chen.
Unyezit
akesNkany
eziandfoll
owsherlaughi
ng.We
getbacktotal
ki
ngaboutourchil
dhoodmemor i
es.

NOXOLO
Iam wat chi
ngromant icmov i
esandcr y
ing.Sanel
e
saidhecan'thandl emycr y
ingandwentt ohisroom.
Itakeascoopofi cecream andshoveitinmymout h.
ThedooropensandKuhl eandAmandawal kin.
Amandai sl
impingandKuhl ekeepsongi vi
ngherthe
sti
nkey e.Whatar etheyfi
ghtingaboutnow?They
greetandKuhlet akesmyspoonandeat smyi ce
cream.
"
Hey
!",
Isayasshet
akesmyi
cecr
eam.
"Ineedthi
s.Thi
sonei
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lme.
",shesay
s
eyeingAmanda.
"
Whati
sit
?",
Iask.
"
Usey
idi
kazi
."(
She'
snol
ongerpur
e.)
,Kuhl
e.
"
Nowonderyouarel
impi
ng.Sowhowasi
t?I
za
Nazo.
"(Hi
tme.
),
Isayi
nchi
ngcloser
.
"
Tal
k."
,Kuhl
e
"
Letmegetsomewi
ne.
",Isayst
andi
ngup.
Ifet
chmywi neandtwogl
asses.Ihandonet
oKuhl
e
andfil
lourgl
asses.
"
Okaygi
rl
!Tal
k."
,Ieager
lysay
.
"
ItwasNkosi
nat
hi.
",shesay
sfi
dget
ing.
"Wait
.Theoneandonl
y?"
,Idi
dn'
tthi
nki
twast
his
deep.
"
Yes.Iki
ndofseducedhi
m."
,Amanda.
"
Hai
bo!Chr
ist
ianGr
eyt
hef
emal
ever
sion.
",Il
augh.
"Sisi
!Ij
ust
..
.IwasstupidIknow.Ij
ustwantedtof
eel
closert
ohim.I.
..It
houghtgivi
ngmy sel
ftohi
m wi
ll
makehi mloveme.",
hervoi
cebreaks.
"St
handwa.Sexdoesn'tkeepaman.Yousti
l
lyoung.
Youst i
l
lhav
eal otofti
met omeetaguywho'
ll
appreci
ateyou.
",Isayandsipmywine.
"Andnextti
meuseprotect
ionAmoh.Whati fhe
didn'
tbr
ingthosemorni
ngafters?Youhadn'ttol
d
meany t
hing.Youol
denought ofal
lpregnant.Be
wisenextti
me.",
Kuhl
esayshol di
ngherhand.
"Nowtel
lushowwasthewhol
eexperi
ence?Washe
big?Hi
sstr
okegame?Washegentl
e?"
,Iask.
Kuhl
elaughsandpushesme.
"I
twasreal
lypai
nfulatf
ir
stbutIki
ndofl
ikeditaft
er
awhil
e.Isi
tokayforaguytoli
ckyoudownt her
e?",
sheasksshyl
y.
Wear
edeadandwehi
ghf
ive.Manshessoi
nnocent
.
"
Didy
oul
i
kei
t?"
,Kuhl
easksher
.
Shenodsplay
ingwi
thherfi
nger
sandwear
edead
agai
n.That
haNkosi
nathi
!
"Yesit
sagoodthi
ng.Asl
ongashi
sdoi
ngi
tri
ght
."
,
Kuhlesay
slaughi
ng.
"
Yohsi
si.Iwassoner
vous.
",shel
oosensup.
"
Nowt
ell
met
hedet
ail
s.St
roket
ost
roke.
",Iur
ge.
"
Noxol
o!"
,Kuhl
elaughs.
"
What
?Iwantt
oheart
his.
",Isayl
aughi
ng.
"Okay
.Thereisthi
sthi
nghedoeswi
thhi
stongue.
",
shehidherfaceandsqueal
ed.
Wear
esi
ppi
ngonourwi
neaswel
i
stent
othi
s.
"
Itwaspai
nful
atfir
standthenhedidthi
sthi
ngof
movi
nghiswaisti
ncir
cles.
",shet
ell
sus.
"Ci
rcul
ati
on!
",
meandKuhl
esayl
aughi
ng.
Wesi
tandlist
entoAmandasst
ory
.Thi
sgener
ati
on
i
sski
l
led!Theyev
enmuffnow.

TSHEGOFATSO
I'
vebeent ry
ingtocal l
Tshepobuthi sphonesends
mest r
aighttov oicemailbuthisposti
ngon
Inst
agr am.Iguesshebl ockedme.Hecan' tdot hi
s
tomemahn!Tshepot lampeang' t
lal
osetse!(hemust
explain!)Igetintotheshowerandcr y
.Hesai dhe
will
trymaki nguswor kev enwiththedistanceand
wehadpr omisedt ovi
siteachother.Igetoutoft he
showeranddeci detogeti nsi
demybl anketsnaked.
Igot hroughhi saccountandhi sjustposteda
pictureofholdinghandsandt hecapt i
oni s"Holdmy
handt hroughitall
."Ihav
echestpai nssamet i
me.Is
thisreal
?Ir est
artmyphone.May bemyphonei s
givingmei ssues.Igobackt oInstagram andcheck
hisaccountagai n.Thepictur
ei ssti
ll
t her
e.Icryand
cov ermyf acewiththeblanket.Doesi thavetohurt
l
iket hi
s?Isobl oudly.
SPECI
ALPI
ECE
AMANDA
"NomanNkosi
nat
hi!You'
recheat
ing!
",Iexcl
aim
pushi
nghi
m wi
thmyshoulder.
"Justadmitt
haty
ousuckatFI
FA.
",hesay
s
chuckli
ng.
We'replayi
ngFIFAinhi
sroom andSanel
eand
Langal
ami arei
ntheGameRoom.Theyhav eareal
l
y
beauti
fulhugehouse.
"
AndIwi
n!Agai
n!"
,hef
istbumpst
heai
r.
"
I'
m notpl
ayi
ngany
mor
e."
,Igi
vehi
mthej
oyst
ick.
"
Sor
eloser
."
,hechuckl
es.
We'vebeenfriendsf ortwohear sandI'venever
heardorseenhi ml augh.Heal waysjustsmi l
esor
chuckl
es.Istealagl anceathi m asheinsertsthe
USBbehindtheTV.Nkosi nathii
sreal
lytall
andhas
whatIcallf
emi ninemascul init
y.Heisreall
ydar k
ski
nnedwithshar pf eatur
es.Hi ssmil
elooksmor eof
asmi r
kcausei tslopsided.Hehasonebr acketand
healwayshasonehandi nhi spocket
.We' r
ebest
fri
endsandIcaughtfeel
i
ngsbuthedoesn'
tknow
that.Her
eall
ylovesAmahleandI
'mjusthi
sfri
end
andIain'
tgonnaliei
thurt
s.
"
Okay
.MsHor
ror
.Mov
ie?
",hesay
shandi
ngmet
he
r
emote.
IchooseAnnabell
eComesHome.Il
ovet
hatmov
ie.
WellIl
oveeveryhorr
ormov
ie.
"
Weed?
",heasks.
Hi
sast
onerandIj
ustsmokeher
eandt
her
e.
"
Whati
fyourDadsmel
l
sit
?",
Iask.
"
They
'r
enotar
ound.
",hesay
sshr
uggi
ng.
Hetakesouthi
s'weedbox'
underhi
sbedandst
art
s
cr
ushing.
"
Youwantt
orol
l
?",
heasks.
"
Yeahcool
."
,Isayt
aki
ngt
her
izl
aandweedf
rom hi
m.
"
I'
ll
gogetmunchi
est
hen.
",hesay
sst
andi
ngup.
HecomesbackwhenI
'
mli
cki
ngandhehandsmea
l
ight
er.
"
Youget
ti
ngbet
ter
."
,hesay
sanal
ysi
ngmyj
oint
.
"
Iknowr
ight
."
,Isaysmi
l
ingpr
oudl
y.
"
Bless.
",hesay
sli
ght
ingi
tandhandi
ngi
ttome.
Helocksthedoorsot heydon'
tcomeinandknowing
Langahe'
lldefi
nit
elysnit
ch.Assoonaswefi
nish
smokingIpressplay.
"
Shi
t!
",heexcl
aimsj
umpi
ngandIl
augh.
"
Iregretsmoki
ngthanwat
chingt
his.I
'
m sopar
anoi
d
r
ightnow.",
hesay
schuckl
ing.
"
It
snott
hatscar
y."
,Isayshr
uggi
ng.
HereachesovermeandIfr
eezef
orasecond.He
smell
ssogood.Hecomesbackwithapacketof
marshmall
ows.Il
etoutabr
eathwhenhegetsback
tohi
spositi
on.
"
You'
reokay
?",
heaskswi
thhi
sey
ebr
owsf
urr
owed.
"
Yeah.
..Uhm.
",Igul
p.
Heshrugsandcar
ri
esoneat
ing.It
akeof
fmyj
acket
andI
'mlefti
nmybralet
.
"
Shoul
dIt
urnt
heai
r-
conon?
",heasksey
eingme.
Inodandhet akestheremoteandIfeelt
heairget
coolerar
oundus.Noneofusar ewatchi
ngthemov i
e
causewe'reeati
ng.Hekeepscracki
ngjokesandI'
m
hi
ghsoIam deadwi t
hlaught
er.
"Mystomachhur
tsNat
hi.Whoa.
",Isayl
aughi
ngand
hechuckl
es.
"OkayI'
ll
stop.
",hesay
schewi
ngt
hei
cef
rom hi
s
glass.
"
You'
recr
azy
.Whochewsi
ce?
",Iaskhi
m.
"I
'
m dangerousAmanda.Ichewwat
er.Sol
i
dwat
er.
",
hesaystaki
nganot
hericecube.
"
You'
rej
usti
cey
.",
Isayandhesmi
l
es.
"Myhist
oryassignmenti
sduenextweekandI
haven'
tevenstart
ed.
",Nat
hi
"
I'
m donewi
thmi
ne.
",Isay
.
"
Cany
oudomi
ne?
",heasksme.
"No.Youwast
eti
mehigh.Youst
il
lhav
etwoday
s."
,I
sayshaki
ngmyhead.
"
Please.
",Nat
hi
"
Fine.R100.
",Isaysmi
l
ing.
"
What
?R50?
",henegot
iat
es.
"No.I
'
m usingmybr
ain.Ti
me.Hands.Sour
ces.
R100.
",Ist
ate.
"
Fine.
",hemumbl
es.
Il
aughathi
m andhet
ickl
esme.
"
Nat
hi!
",Iscr
eam l
aughi
ng.
Hest
opsti
ckl
ingmeandwhenhei
saboutt
ogetof
f
meIpul
lhi
sfaceandki
sshi
m.Hepul
l
sout.
"
Amanda.
",Nat
hi
"
Shhh.
",Ishushhi
m.
Ipul
lhi
m agai
nandher espondst
histi
mear ound.
Hehasreal
lysof
tli
ps.Ipull
hisT-
shir
toverhishead.
"
Amanda.
",hesay
slooki
ngatme.
"
Nat
hi.
",Isayl
ooki
ngatathi
m.
HeshakeshisheadandInodmi ne.Iseehi
sjawt
ick
andIpul
lhiminforanotherkiss.Ir
unmyhandsov er
hi
sabs.Hisasoccerplayer.Hishandgoesonmy
thi
ghandsinceI'm weari
ngajeanmini
ski
rthehas
access.WhenIstartunbuckl
i
nghisbel
thejumps
offandheaves.Isi
tupandheshakeshishead.
"Amanda.We'refr
iends.Wecan'
tdot
his.Pl
usyou'
re
vir
gin.No.
",hesay
spi cki
nguphi
sshi
rt
.Istandup
andsitonthebed.
"
Iknowbuty ou'r
etheonl
yguyItr
ustenoughtotake
myvir
gini
ty.
",Isayl
ooki
nghim st
rai
ghti
nhiseyes.
"You'
renott
hinki
ngstr
aight
.Iknowweedcanmake
onehornysolet'
sputt
heblameonit.
",hesay
s
sit
ti
ngnextt
ome.
"I
'
m notsayingmarryme.Al
lI'
m aski
ngf
ori
s
orgasms.
",Isaybl
untl
y.
"
Whatdoy ouevenknowaboutor
gasmsAmanda?
No.
",hesaysst
ernl
y.
Icameher ewithapurposeandIsitontopofhi m.I
don'tknowwher eI'
m gett
ingt
heconfi
dence.He
tr
iestalki
ngandIkisshim anddr
yhumphi m.I
watchedporntoknowal l
aboutt
hisandI'
m praying
I'
m doi ngi
tri
ght.Hetraceshi
shandfrom myt highs
andl i
ft
smyskirtupsqueezingmybutt.Hetakesof f
mybr al
etandher ubshisfingersonmynipples.I
feelawetnessonmypant ies.Heroll
susoverand
hisnowont op.Hest art
skissingmyneckanda
soundescapesmyl i
ps.Het akesoffmyski
rtandI
feelmyheartrat
equi ckens.HenoticesI
'
mt ense
andlooksatme.
"
Arey
ousur
e?"
,heasks.
Inodandheshakeshi
shead.
"
Arey
ousur
e?"
,her
epeat
s.
"
Yes.
",Isay
.
Het akesof fhi
spant sandcl i
mbsont opofme
agai n.Hisrubbinghi shandsal lovermewhi l
e
kissingme.Het r aceskissesdownunt i
lmybel ly
but t
on.Hel ooksupatmeandheuseshi steethto
takeof fmyt hi
ng.Iboughtt hongsspeci alfortoday.I
closemyl egsasIst ar
tfeelingsel fconscious.He
openst hem gent l
yandhei sst i
lll
ookingatme.I
thinkI '
m goingtopukemyhear tout.Ifeelhis
fi
nger spar tmyf oldsandhel icksme.Imoanandhe
put shisar msar oundmyt highsandpul l
smecl oser.
I'
venev erexperi
encedt hisbef oreandI '
m enjoy i
ngit.
Ifeelsomet hi
ngknotinmyabdomenandIl i
ft
my selfupbuthedoesn'tl
etgoofmythighsand
neitherdoeshestopsuckingme.Ical
m downafter
whatf eltl
i
keaheav enl
yhigh.Hecomesbacktomy
face.
"
That
sanor
gasm.
",hesay
ssmugl
y.
Hetrieskissi
ngmebutImov
emyf
aceandhe
chuckles.
"
Tast
eyour
sel
f.
",hesay
sst
icki
nghi
stonguei
nmy
mout
h.
I
ttast
esforei
gnandIl
i
keitwei
rdl
y.If
eel
himr
ub
hi
mselfdownther
eandIf
idget
.
"
Rel
ax.
",hesay
ski
ssi
ngme.
Hetri
esenter
ingmeandImov eup.Hepull
sme
backandtr
iesagai
nwhil
ekeepingmeint
act.If
eel
somethi
ngentermeandIpul
loutandscream.
"
Uyangi
l
imaza.
",
Isaysobbi
ng.
Hest
opsmov
ingandl
ooksatme.
"
Ngi
yeke?
",heasks.
Ishakemyheadandhekissesmyeyesandwipes
myt ear
s.Heki
ssesmeagainandheent
ersdeeper
.
"
Nat
hi!
",Iscr
eam.
Heholdsmyhandsabov
emgheadcauseI
'
m
pushi
nghi
m.
"
Doy
ouwantmet
ost
op?
",heasks.
"
No.I
tsj
ustr
eal
l
ypai
nful
."
,Isay
.
"That
sbecausey
ou'r
ev i
rgi
n.Justbearwi
thme.
",he
saysusi
nghisot
herhandtowipemyt ear
s.
Inodandhest art
smov i
ng.Ibit
emyl i
p.Il
thurt
s
mor ewhenheextract
s.Hisgroani
nglowlyandhis
otherhandgoesdownt orubmyclitandthe
pleasur
ekicksin.
"Fuck!You'
ret
ight
."
,hegr
oansl
ett
inggoofmy
hands.
HemoveshiswaistaroundandIar
chmyback
gr
abbi
ngthesheets.HegoesindeeperandIar
ch
mybackasmyey esrollwi
thmymout hopen.
"
Nat
hi.
",Imoanout
.
Icanhearourski
nssl
appingandhehasmynippl
ein
hismouth.Mypussyfar
tsandIhi
demyf acewi
th
hands.Hechuckl
esandremovesthem.Hehasn'
t
stoppedmoving.
"
Don'tbeshy.I
tsnormal
."
,hesay
sashedoest
hat
t
hingwithhi
swaistagai
n.
"
Nat
hi!
",Iscr
eam asIpul
lhi
shai
randIor
gasm.
Hekeepsmovi
ngandIf
eel
him gr
abmet
ight
erand
hecusses.
"
FuckAmanda!
",hegr
oansout
.
Ifeel
warmnessinsi
demeandwestayli
ket
hat.
Bothofusshaki
ngandbr
eathi
ngheav
il
y.Hepul
ls
outandIwhine.
"
Shi
t!
",hesay
s.
"
What
?",
Iask.
"Ididn'
tpullouti
nti
me.I
'm sor
ry.I
'
llbuymor
ning
afters.
",hesaysl
ayi
ngbesi
desme.
InodandIfinal
lygetachancetolookathispeni
s
andIbl
ink.Howdi dthatf
iti
nsi
deme?Il ookdown
andInoti
ceIbled.That'
snormal.Si
sKuhletol
dme.
"
Sor
ryabuty
oursheet
s."
,Isayl
ooki
ngaway
.
"I
tsf
ine.I
'l
lchanget
hem.Come.
",hesay
sst
andi
ng
upandlif
tsmeup.
I
'm sur
pri
sedastohowhecanlif
tmeupbuthe
doesn'
tseem t
ocomplai
n.Hefi
ll
sthewat
erand
oncetheywarm,hehel
psmeinsi
de.
"
I'
ll
beback.
",hesay
swr
appi
ngat
owel
aroundhi
s
t
orso.
"
Wai
t.
",Isayhur
ri
edl
y.
Het
urnsbackandl
ooksatme.
"
Whatnow?
",Iakshi
m.
Her
unshi
shandt
hroughhi
shai
randshr
ugs.
"
Nooneshoul
deverknowaboutthi
s.Especi
all
y
Amahl
e.We'
rest
il
lfr
iendst
hou.
",hesaysandleav
es.
Il
ookdownatt hewaterandat eardr
ops.Stupi
d!
Stupi
d!Hedoesn'tseeyouthatway!Ibathandfi
nish
up.Ineedt
ogethome.Idr essupandwhenhe
comesbackhegi vesmetwopai nki
ll
ers.
"
Mom i
sdownst
air
s.Myuncl
esandDadar
eont
hei
r
wayback.I '
l
l askt
hedrivert
otakeyouandSanele
home.Sanel esaysheisgoingstr
aighttohi
splace.
I
'l
lbringthemor ni
ngaftersaty
ourplace.Ij
ustneed
totakeaqui ckshower.
",hesaysandkissesmyas
usual whenhesay sgoodbye.
Ijusttakemyj acketandbagandl eave.Idon'
tfind
hismom soIhur ryoutandthepai nbetweenmy
thighsremindsmeofwhathadj usthappened.Il ook
out si
dethewindowt hewhol eri
deandSanel ejust
holdsmyhandt il
lwedr ophim off.Assoonashe
get soffIst
artcryi
ng.Thedr i
verlooksatmet hrough
ther earmir
ror.Iwanttobei nmyr oom andcr yin
peace.Asi fhereadsmymi ndhei ncr
easeshi s
speed.
43
KUHLEKONKE
"Nkosinat
hiisst
il
lpi
ssedatus.Hei
sbr
okeashel
l
.",
Bhekikhaya
"Asl
ongasy'
all
pai
dthedamages.Amandahas
beensul
ki
ngtoo
"
,It
ell
him.
"Ki
ds.They
'r
egett
ingl
aid.
",Bheki
khay
asay
s
cli
mbingontopofme.
"
NowI
'
m get
ti
ngl
aid.
",
Isayki
ssi
nghi
m.
I'
mjustinhisT-shirtsohealreadyhashishand
downt her
e.Hei srubbingonmycl itandhis
fi
nger
ingmeatt hesamet i
me.Ihelphim outofhi
s
sweatpantsandhepul lstheT-shi
rtovermyhead.
"
Nof
orepl
ay.
",It
ell
him andhenods.
Her ubshimsel
fonmebef or
eslammingi nt
omeand
Ialreadyknowit
'sgoingtoberough.Heputsa
cushionundermeallowinghim deeppenetr
ati
on.I
am maki ngnoi
sewithallmymoansbutwe' reathis
placesoIcanscream asloudasIwant .Heleads
myhandbet weenusandIr ubmy self.Igr
abthe
sheetsashepushesdeeper .Icum ashepi nchesmy
nippl
e.Heputsmyl egstogetherandmakesmehol d
them onmyleftandheent ers.Sexwi thhi
mi s
alwaysent
ici
ng.Heknowshowt of ul
fil
lmyevery
need.It
sli
kehewascr eatedspeci all
yforme.

TSHEGOFATSO
"OkayIhaveaplan.I
tspett
ybutifi
tmakesyouf
eel
bett
erthanokay
.",Khul
ekanisay
ssit
ti
ngup.
Ij
ustshr
ugandhet
akesmyphone.
"
Passwor
d?"
,heasks.
"
0410.
",It
hehi
m si
tt
ingup.
"
Okay
.",
hesay
spl
aci
ngmyphoneonmyst
udyt
abl
e.
Heput
smycamer
aont
imerandv
ideo.
"
What
'st
hatf
or?
",
Iaskconf
used.
"We'
regoi
ngt opret
endwe'redati
ng.You'r
egoingt
o
posti
tonInstaandtagme.Hisgoingtoseey ou
movedon.Pluswel ookgr
eattogether
."
,hesays
smi
l
ingatme.
"You'
resostupid.Whosai
dthat
'l
lwor
k?Hewon'
t
evencare.
",It
ellhi
m.
"
Buty
oudo.Comesi
tont
opofme.
",hesay
spul
l
ing
myar
m.
"No!That'
stoopetty.It
snotevenreal.Ican'
tgive
peopleanimpressi
onI '
minar el
ati
onshipwhenI '
m
notinone.I'
l
lbesinglecauseeveryonewi l
lthi
nk
we'r
edating.
",It
ellhim.
"Thanlet
'smakei
treal
."
,hesay
slooki
ngmei
nthe
eyes.
"
Arey
oushoot
ingy
ourshot
?",
Iaskl
aughi
ng.
"Wel
l.
..Yeah.Ir
eall
yli
keyouanditsbeenmont hs.I
knowitswrongbutI'
m happythathecheated.He
madet hi
ngseasierf
orme.AndIt hi
nkIlov
ey ou."
,he
sai
dandInot i
cehiseyesshi
mmer .
Hebett
ernotcr
yonme.Ismi
l
eandonet
earf
all
s
andIhughi
m.
"
Ihat
edbei
ngcloset
oyouandnotbei
ngablet
ot el
l
y
ouhowIfel
t.I
t'
sthemostpai
nful
tor
tur
eI'
veever
beent
hrough.
",hesay
sandIwi
pehi
stear
s.
"St
opcryi
ng.You'
regoi
ngt
omakemecr
y."
,It
ell
him
asIgetemoti
onal
.
"
Sor
ry.
",heapol
ogi
ses.
"
Don'
t.Iunder
stand.
",It
ell
him.
"I
nallthesemonthswe'vebeenfr
iends.Doyouthink
ofgivi
ngmeachance?Byanychancedi dyoucatch
feel
i
ngs?I fnotI
'
llunder
standan-
",
Khule
Icuthim offwithakissandheresponds.Who
wouldn'tcatchfeel
ings?Hewasagoodf ri
end.I
thoughthedi dn'
tli
kemecausehedi dn'
tshowany
signs.

NOXOLO
Iam atthebakery,baki
ngandhel pi
ngtheot
her
bakers.Igotboredathomesi nceSanel
eisvi
sit
ing
hi
snewf ri
endLangalami.Il
ookatthecakeand
smile.Perf
ect.
"
Nox.Someonei
saski
ngf
ory
ouatt
hef
ront
."
,Pi
nky
"
I'
ll
bet
her
est
handwa.
",Isaywi
pingmyhands.
Ifi
ndNdabenkhul
ubythecount
erandhesmi
les
whenheseesme.Theladi
esaregivi
nghi
mlooks
andthej
ealousyi
nsi
demeisbrewing.
"
Hey
.",
Igr
eetsmi
l
ing.
"Hey.Youthef
ir
stper
sonIknowthatmakesaBaker
unif
ormlooksogood.
",hesay
s.
SeewhyIl
i
ket
hisguy
?Hi
sal
way
scompl
i
ment
ing
me.
"
Thanky
ou.Let
'sgot
omyof
fi
ce.
",Isaysmi
l
ing.
Igrabhi
sfavouri
techocol
atemuff
insandhef
oll
ows
behindme.Heopenst hedoorf
ormeandwesit
downonmyof f
icecouch.
"
Her
eyougo.
",Ihandhi
m hi
smuf
fi
ns.
"
Thanks.
",hesmi
l
es.
"
Iknowy
oucamef
ort
hose.
",Isaychuckl
i
ng.
"
Yeahandy ou.Ihav
en'
tseeny
oui
nawhi
l
e."
,
Ndabenkhul
u.
"
Iknow.I
'
m al
way
sbusy
.I'
m openi
ngnewbr
anches
andI'
vemadeanamef ormyself
.Mycakesar
ethe
tal
koftown.
",Isayandhesmiles.
"Iaskedmypoeti
cbrothertohell
wr i
temeapoem
andheendedupmaki ngitsexual.Iwouldgi
vei
tto
youbutit
sinappr
opri
ate."
,hesaysscratchi
nghi
s
beardwit
hhiscarkeys.
"Youj
ustupt
ight
.Showme.
",Isayi
nchi
ngcl
osert
o
him.
"
Ify
oui
nsi
st.
",hesay
staki
nghi
sphoneout
.
"Ihear
dyou'
reaBaker
.
Thechocol
atebi
scui
twi
thst
rawber
rycr
eam i
sthe
tal
koftown.
Onl
yaf
ewhav
ehadt
hechancet
oeati
t.
Iknowi
tai
n'
tforsal
eei
ther
.
Wi
tht
hemosthumbl
estv
oice
CanIt
akeabi
te?
I
'
llbegent
le.
I
'
dpar
titandl
i
ckt
hest
rawber
rycr
eam.
Cl
osei
tanddi
piti
nmi
l
k.
I
'
llt
akeani
pati
t
I
fthet
ast
eitent
ici
ng
ThanI
'
lldev
ouri
t.
SoMsBaker
CanIhav
ethatbi
scui
tnow?
Don'
ttel
lmei
tsoutofst
ock.
Icanseei
tthr
oughy
ourt
ight
s.
Looki
ngdel
i
ciousbet
weeny
ourt
highs.
Sonowdoy
oumi
nd?
I
tsj
ustal
i
ttl
ebi
te.
",
her
eadsoutandl
aughs.
"
Thati
ssomesexual
creat
ivi
ty.
",Isayl
aughi
ng.
"Mybrot
her
sar
ecr
azy
.",
hesay
sput
ti
nghi
sphone
away.
"No.Youarej
ustupt
ight
.Ican'
tbel
i
evey
ouasked
helpwri
ti
ngapoem.Forme. "
"Uh.
..Iam notreal
lygoodwithwords.I
'm mor
eofan
acti
onsguy .
",hesayslooki
ngaround.
"That
'ssosweet.Howaboutdi
nneratmypl
ace?
",I
asknervousl
y.
"
Yeah.I
'
mti
redofmyowncooki
ng.
"
"
Youcancook?
",Iasksur
pri
sed.
"Yeah.Thebest
.Iownr
est
aur
ant
ssoi
tsamust
."
,he
saysshruggi
ng.
"
Let
'smakeadeal
.Ibakef
ory
ouonceamonthand
y
ouCookformetwiceamont
h."
,It
ell
him.
"
Whyar
eyour
obbi
ngme?50/
50.
",hesay
s.
"
ButIcanbakeacakebi
genought
olasty
oua
week.
"
"AndIcancookenought
olasty
ouaweekt
oo.
",he
shoot
sback.
"
Okay.Ibaketwotimesamonth.Youcookt
wo
t
imesamont h."
,Isayhandi
nghi
m myhand.
"
Deal
."
,hepul
l
smyhandandhugsme.
Thi
sissocomf or
tabl
e.Wepul
lbackandheeat
shis
muff
ins.HefeedsmeapieceandIsmil
eandopen
mymout h.Heremovesal
onepiecef
rom t
hecor
ner
ofmymouthandheli
cksi
tof
fhi
sthumb.Wecar
ry
oneat
ingandl
aughi
ng.

UNYEZI
DadhasNkany
ezi
inhi
sar
msandhei
sapr
oud
gr
andfat
her
.
"
Hel ooksl
ikehi
sfat
her
."
,hesay
ssmi
l
ingat
Nkanyezi
.
"I
tsl
i
kehisnotev
enmi ne.I
tsunf
aircauseIcar
ri
ed
hi
mf orni
nemonths.
",Isul
k.
"Sor
ryMkami
butmygenesar
est
ronger
."
,Langa
comesin.
"
Hey
.You'
reback.
",Iki
sshi
scheek.
"
Yeah.Wher
e'r
etheboy
s?"
,Langa
"Langai
swi thSanel
ebythepool
.Nkosi
nat
hii
sst
il
l
sulki
ng.
",Isayandhenods.
"
Baba.Ngiy
athembaunet
hezeki
leekhaya.
"(
Ihope
y
oucomf or
tabl
eathome.)
,hesaystoDad.
Ideci
det
oleav
ethem andgocheckonNat
hi.Hi
s
beenint
hatr
oom f
orweeksnow.Iknockonhi
s
door.
"
Nat
hi.Open.
",Iknockhar
der
.
Heopensthedoorandhel eavesmether
eandI
fol
lowhi
m.Isitonhiscouchandhefacesmewhi l
e
sit
ti
ngonthebed.Hisgrowingupandthatscar
es
me.Nexti
twil
l beLangaandthenNkanyezi
.
"
Hav
eyout
alkedt
oAmanda?
",Iaskaf
tersi
l
ence.
"
Yeah.
",
her
esponds.
"
And?
"
"Shejustapologizedforseduci
ngmeandmaki ng
mel ose3mont hswor t
hall
owance.Shesai
dshe'
ll
givemehal fofheral l
owance.Morel
ikef
orcedme
toacceptit.
",hesay s.
"
Hav
eyout
alkedt
oAmahl
e?"
"Sheisgoingt
oboar
dingschool
.Herparent
stold
hertodumpme.She'sblockedme.
",hesaysrubbi
ng
hisface.
"
Arey
ouokayt
hou?
"
"
Yeah.Ij
ust
..
.I'
m pr
ocessi
ngev
ery
thi
ng.
",heshr
ugs.
"
Whydi
dn'
tyouusepr
otect
ion?
",Iask.
"I
twasaspuroft hemoment.Iwasn'
tthi
nking
str
aight
.Iboughthermor
ningaft
erpi
ll
s."
,Nathi
"Youdoknowt hatthey
'r
enot100%ef
fi
cientr
ight
?",
I
askhim andhesighs.
"IknowandI'
m pr
ayi
ngi
tdoesn'
tgett
oherbei
ng
pregnant
."
,Nat
hi.
"
Lear
nfr
om t
his.
",It
ell
him.
Henodsandl
aysonhi
sbed.Thi
sisr
eal
l
yst
ressi
ng
hi
m out
.
"Well
.YourDadisdri
vingmeandBabat omom's
gravei
nKwaMakhut ha.We' l
lcomebackt omorr
ow
l
ate.Takecareofyourbrother.IaskedThandoto
comeandsl eepwi
thy a'
l
l."
,Ikisshisfor
ehead.
"
Mom!
",hewhi
nes.
"
Bye.
",Isayl
aughi
ng.
Icl
osehi
sdoorandheaddowntothepool.Langai
s
goi
ngtothr
owafitaboutmel
eavi
ng.Thatkid
al
way swant
smear
oundhi
m.Idot
oobutIhav
e
dut
ies.

THANDOLWETHU
Ij
ustgotmybel
l
ypi
erci
ngwhenDadcal
l
smef
ort
he
100t
htime.
"
Dad.
"
"
Ndodakazi
.Youal
ri
ght
?",
heasks.
"
Dad.Youcal
l
edme30mi
nut
esago.I
'
m st
il
lfi
ne.
"
"
I'
mjustchecki
ngupony
ou.
",Dad
"Iknowyouwor
ri
edbutI'
mfi
ne.Abobhut
itaketur
ns
onr emi
ndi
ngmetotakemypi
ll
s.Wejustworri
ed
aboutyou.
"
"
Wor r
iedaboutme?I
'
mfi
neact
ual
l
yI'
m gr
eat
."
,Ican
t
ell
hissmili
ng.
"
Dad?Bhuti
Khulekani
say
syouhav
eagi
rl
fr
iend.Do
y
ou?"
,Ifi
nal
lyask.
"
Khul
ekaniisf
orwardmahn.I'
l
ltel
ly'
al
l.Di
nner
?At
myhouse.Sat
urday
? "
,Dad.
"
Cool
.I'
l
ltel
ltheot
her
s."
Webi dourgoodby esandendt hecal
l.Idri
vedown
t
oMer ebank.Il
ookattheaddressagainandIwait.
Hecomesoutdr essedint
racksuit
sandst art
s
j
ogging.Rightontime.Ist
arttherent
al caranddr
ive
t
owar dsinspeed.Hedodgesoutoft hewayand
f
all
sont hepavement.Idr
ivepasthim andsendhim
amessage.
"
Nextt
imeI
'
lldr
iveov
ery
ou.Xoxo.
"
Sthembisoi
saboutt or
egretmeetingme.Idri
vet
he
carbacktothecompanyandgeti ntomine.I
'
m
babysi
tt
ingfortheweekend.Idr
ivetoYell
owWood.I
missedspendingti
mewi t
hmynephews.Amessage
fr
om Ndabenkhulucomest hr
ough.
"
Dri
nky
ourpi
l
ls.Il
ovey
ou.
"
Ismi
l
eandpar konthesideoft
heroadanddown
mypi
ll
swi t
hbott
ledwater.I
'
m gl
adourrel
ati
onshi
p
i
simprov
ing.
44
UNYEZI
We' vebeenher eal lni
ghtonourkneessi pahla.
Mom' ssoul hasl ef tthetr
eeandwe' reher etoask
hert oshowust hewaybackt omymat ernalhome.
Shei sholdingbackandI '
vebeenbeggi ngt hewhol e
night.Iaddi ncenseandl i
ghtitandspr inklesnuf f
.All
Iknowi shersur namei sMadal aneandt hatshe' s
fr
om Mpumal anga.Ev enLangacoul dn'ttrackher
pastmov ement s.Igr untasIf eelherfullpresence
aroundme.Ist ar tfeeli
ngrejected.Herf ami l
y
disownedher .Aheav yfeel
ingoff earconsumest hat
i
tl eavesabi ttert asteinmymout h.She'sscar edof
herf amil
y'sr eact ionaboutme.
"
Mama.Showust
heway
.Leav
ether
estt
ome.
"
Istandupasthecandl
esswit
chof
fandt
hei
ncense
too.Il
ookatDadandshrug.
"Shedecli
nes.Ithinkther
e'smoretoherbei
ng
disowned.Langapl easekeepontryi
ng.Weneedt
o
fi
ndaBnBnear by.Seemsl i
kewe'l
lbeheref
or
anotherday.
",Itel
l t
hem yawni
ng.
"St
handwasami.Let
'sgogety
ousomerest.We'l
l
checkontheki
dsassoonasyouwakeup."
,Langa
saysdust
ingmyknees.
"
Mkhonyanauqini
sil
endodakazi
."(
Son-
in-
lawi
sri
ght
mydaughter
.)
,Dadsayswalki
ngaheadofus.
Heisangryatmomssel fi
shnessbutheneedst o
underst
andthatgoingbacktomomspl aceofbirt
h
we'l
lbeunpackinghersecr
ets.Igeti
ntothecarand
Langaholdsmyhand.
"
Ever
ythi
ng'
swi
l
lbef
ine.
",hesay
ski
ssi
ngi
t.
"
Ihopeso.
",Isaycl
osi
ngmyey
es.
Ireal
l
ydocauseIwanttofi
nishever
ythingsoIcan
fi
nall
ybewit
hmyfamily
.Mom i sdel
ayingme.Al ot
hastobedonebef
oreIleav
ef orSwazi
land.

THANDOLWETHU
Nkanyeziissuchapeacef
ulchil
d.Uny
ezi l
efthi
m
somebr eastmil
ksohedoesn'thavemucht ocry
about.Iputhi
mi nhi
scotashef al
l
sasleepafterhi
s
bi
rth.Iwouldli
keki
dsofmyownbutwi t
hSt henot
wanti
ngmeI '
llneverhav
et hat
.Iwal koutofhis
room l
eav i
ngthedoorhalfclosed.Ihavet hebaby
monitorinmyhand.Langai swatchingIgnit
ion
Channel.Thiskidandcars.Iki
sshi scheeksi t
ti
ng
nextt
ohi m.
"HasNkosi
nat
hicomedownf
orbr
eakf
ast
?",
Iask
him.
"Yeah.Het
ookhispl
ateandl
eftt
oeati
nhisroom.
",
hesay swi
thhi
seyessti
l
lont
heTVscreen.
Ihaveat hingforcarsbutit
snotasdeepasLangas.
I'
mt hinki
ngofpur chasi
ngaBMW X7wi thacustom
i
nterior.AMer cedesBenzBarabustoowoul
ddo.I
l
ov ebigcar s.Myphoneringsandit
sBheki
khaya.
"Bhut
i.
",Ianswer
.
"
Thando.Hav
eyoubeent
aki
ngy
ourpi
l
ls?
",heasks.
"YeahandKhul
ekani
remi
ndedmet
hismor
ning.
",I
answerconf
used
"I
tscleart
hey'
renotworki
ng.Whyareyoust
alki
nga
SthembisoMthethwa?Tothepoi
ntyoualmostr
an
hi
m wi t
hoverandsenthimthr
eateni
ngmessages.
",
Bheki
khay
a.
"
Wehav
eunr
esol
vedi
ssues.
",Isayst
andi
ngup.
"
Whi
char
e?"
,heasks.
"Hecal
ledmeahoodrat.Andtheremightbea
possi
bil
it
ythathi
smydesti
ned."
,Itel
lhi
m si
ghi
ng.
"Soyouthi
nkthreateni
nghim wil
lchangehi
svi
ew
aboutyou?Lethim be.
",Bheki
khaya
"
It
snoteasy
.You'
rehaveyours.Minedoesn'
twant
me.Youwon'
tunder
stand.
",Iam get
ti
ngaheadache.
"Your i
ght.Butthatdoesn'tmeany ouhav et
oactso
chil
dish.Focusony ourselff
ir
st.Youhav eduti
es.
Dadwant sy ourplanony ourbusiness.Submiti
t
i
nsteadofchasi nggolddiggers.
",
heendst hecall
.
Sot heyhav et
absonme.Isi ghasIt hinkhiswords
through.Mybusi nessplanisready .Ihadt imeto
draftitwhil
eatthatasylum.Ijustneedt osubmit
andpi tch.We'
rerichbutDadnev erspoi l
edus.
Educat ioni
salsoav er
yi mportantthingi nourfamil
y.
Ineedt omakesur emypi t
chgoeswel lsohecan
fundmeandIcanbui l
dmypsy chiatrichospital
s.I
fit
doesn'tgowellIhavetogobacktoschool.Letme
getstart
edonl unch.IcheckonNkany
eziandhis
sti
l
lsleeping.

TSHEGOFATSO
Ikeeponwat chingthev i
deof rom y est
erdayand
smili
ng.I
fany onetoldmet hatmeandTshepo
wouldendIwoul d'velaughedont heirf
ace.Isti
ll
can'
tbeli
evedKhul ekanicried.Histextcomes
thr
oughasI '
m wat chi
ngt hev i
deof orthemi l
l
ionth
ti
me.WhenI '
m aboutt oreplyhisv i
deocallcomes
thr
ough.Heiswear i
ngadur agandhel ookssosexy.
"
Hey
.",
Igr
eetsmi
l
ing.
"Munt
uwami
."
,hi
sgr
inni
ngandhi
sdi
mpl
esar
eso
cut
e.
Ismi
l
eathi
m andl
aybackont
hebed.
"
CanIt
akey
ououtf
orl
uncht
oday
?",
Khul
ekani
.
"Youalway
staki
ngmeoutf
orl
unch.NowonderI
'
ve
gainedsomuchwei
ght
."
"
Okayl
et'
schangei
t.I
'
llaskmyChefbr
othert
ocook
hi
stribeanddumpl
ingmeal andwe'll
hav
eitatmy
house.Netf
li
xandchi
ll
."
,Khulekani
"MyNetfl
i
xandChi
l
lpr
obabl
ydi
ff
erentf
rom y
our
s."
,I
chuckl
e.
"
What
'sy
ourdef
ini
ti
onofNet
fl
ixandChi
l
l?"
,heasks.
"
Orat
adi
l
o.Sowhatt
ime?
",Ichanget
het
opi
c.
"
AboSeho.Ar
ound13h00.I
'
llf
etchy
ou.
",Khul
ekani
.
"
Okay
.Seey
out
hen.
",
Idr
opt
hecal
lsmi
l
ing.
Itfeelssogoodact uall
ybeingwi thsomeoney ou
hav ef eelingsfor .Itfeelssogoodt ochoose
someonebymy selfandnotf eeli
nglikeIneedDad' s
appr ov al.Speaki ngoft hatasshol ehedisownedme
andatt heendoft hi syearIhav etof i
ndawayt opay
formyschool fees.Hebl amesmet hatTshepo
cheat edasi fIsenthi m.Hisj ustbit
terTshepos
fathert ookbackhi sv oteforhimt obeami nister
.
Hisdr i
v enbypowerandhet hinksjustcausehegav e
hissper mI 'm hispossessi on.Thewor stthingishe
hasmom i nhishandandshei shispuppet .Always
fol
lowi nghi sever yor derandendur ingtheabuse,the
mist ressesandt hepubl ichumi li
ati
on.Evenmy
grandmot herhasgi
venupt ry
ingt obri
ngher
daught erhomebutheysperm al waysbeenthicker
thanbl ood.Ihav
etocallmygr andmotherbutf or
nowwhatam Iev engoingtowearf orourNetflixand
chil
l.Somet hi
ngsexyandcomf ort
abl
ethatalso
l
eav esmucht oi
maginati
on.Whoknows?May beI '
d
getlaid.

NOXOLO
"
Soy
ou'
ret
hef
ir
stbor
n?"
,Iaskashest
ir
shi
spot
.
Weendedupagr
eeingt
ohav i
ngbr
eakf
astathi
s
pl
acet
oday.AndI'
m st
il
lawedbyhi
shouse.
"Yeah.Bheki
khay
aafterme.ThanitsLangal
akhel
ihl
e.
Khulekani
.Thantheonlygi
rl
.Thandol
wethu.
",he
turnsbackhi
sattent
iontome.
"
Thatsalotofy
'al
l.Ican'
ti
magi
negi
vi
ngbi
rt
hso
manyti
mes.I'
ddie."
"
WellIcan'
tpr
omi
set
onothaveyouinthelabour
war
dev er
ythr
eey
ear
s."
,hesay
sshrugging.
Il
aughandhechuckl
es.I
tsni
cet
oseehi
mlet
ti
ng
l
ooseabi
t.
"Shoul
dIdishupforyoubef
oreKhulekani
comes
andtakeshistr
ibeanddumpli
ngs?
",heasklooki
ng
atmeintentl
y.
I'
m usedtohi
sey
esnow.Iev
enst
oppedaski
ng
aboutit
.
"
Pleasedo.
",
Isaysi
tt
ingont
hecount
erandf
li
ngi
ng
mylegs.
"Imadesomecustar
dyest
erday
.Hel
pyour
sel
f.
",he
point
stothef
ri
dge.
"Areyoutry
ingtomakemef at?I
'
vebeeneat
ing
sinceIgother
e."
,Isayheadi
ngtothef
ri
dge.
"
Yety
ou'
rest
il
leat
ing.
",hel
aughsatme.
"Ienj
oyfoodokay
.Howdoy outhi
nkIhav
ethi
s
booty?"
,Icl
i
mbont hecount
eragai
n.
"
Whatboot
y?"
,heact
stobel
ooki
ngar
oundandI
l
augh.
"Pl
ease.Youknowexact
lywhatI
'
mtal
ki
ngabout
."
,I
pushhisshoul
derl
aughi
ng.
"
Her
eyougo.
",hehandsmeabowl
oft
ri
be.
"Thankyou.Thi
ssmel
l
sgr eat
."
,Isayt
aki
nga
spoonfuli
ntomymouth.
Imoanatthedev i
netast
ewit
hmyeyesclosed.Thi
s
i
sgreat
.Deli
cious.Nothi
ngl
i
keI'
veev
ertasted
bef
ore.
"I
'
m goingt
ohi r
eyou.Ineedachef.Myki
tchen
needsone.
",Isayopeni
ngmyey es.
Hi
sleani
ngont
hesi
nkandl
ooki
ngatme.
"I
'
m agreatchef.I
'm sur
eI'
dtakecar
eofyour
ki
tchenver
ywel l
."
,andhi
ssentencei
sembiquet
te
j
udgingbythelookinhisey
es.Sli
ck.
"
Ihopeyoudon'
tdi
sappointcauseIlov
egoodf
ood.I
l
i
kebeingfedwel
l.
",Igowit
ht hef
low.
"
Isur
edoser
vesomegoodf
ood.
",hesay
snear
ing
me.
Hegrabsapiecefrom t
hebowl andputsiti
nhis
mouth.Heputsthebowl i
nt hesinkbehindhi
m and
get
sinbetweenmyt hi
ghs.Hebet terki
ssmecause
i
fhedoesn'ti
nthenextmi nuteI'
llgoallHOEonhim.
Herunshi shandsonmyt hi
ghsandpullsmeal i
tt
le
bi
tclosertohim.Thisi
saf i
rst
.Theonlytouchi
ngwe
di
dishugsandt hepal
m onmyl owerbackwhenwe
ent
erar estaur
ant.
"I
'
m amanofpr i
nci
pleandrespect.I
'
m whatyoucal
l
ol
dschoolwit
hat i
ngeofmoder ni
ty.
",hei
nches
cl
oserandourgroi
nsaretouchi
ng.
Hebett
ersaywhathewantst
osay'
fastquick'
cause
t
hiscl
osenesshasmethr
obbi
ngdownt her
e.
"
Bengi
sacel
aukuthiubewumkami
."(
Pleasebemy
wi
fe.
),
Ndabenkhul
u.
Iwidenmyeyesandst
utt
er.What
?!Hej
umpedf
rom
fr
iendst
owif
e.
"Uh.Ndabenkhul
u.That'
s.
..Wow.
..Huge.
",Ican'
t
evenform asensi
blesent
enceri
ghtnow.
"
I'm notgrowi
nganyy oungerasy oucanseet he
whitehairsur
faci
ng.Ican'tbehavingagirl
fr
iend
whenI '
m abouttoturn30.Thatjustdoesn'
tsound
r
ight.Iwanttomakey oumywi feandwe'vegotten
t
oknoweachot herreall
ywell.
",herest
shiselbows
l
ightl
yonmyt hi
ghsandl ooksatme.
"
Marri
agei
sabigst
ep.Wehav
en'
tev
enhadsex
y
et.
",
Isayl
ooki
ngaway.
"Wecanhavesexi
fyouwantt
o."
,hesay
smaki
ng
somereal
deepeyecont
act
.
"
Idi
dn'
tmeani
tli
ket
hat
."
,Imeanti
tli
ket
hatbuthey
.
"
Thanwhatdi
dyoumean?
",heasksi
nchi
ngcl
oser
t
omyneck.
"Uh..
.I.
..Justt
hat..
.It
s..
.Uh.
..
",Icl
earmyt
hroatasI
feelhi
swar m breat
hmaket hehairsonmyneck
stand.
"
Iaskedaquesti
onNoxol
o."
,henipsmyneckandI
moanandclenchmythi
ghsaroundhi
m.
Hef
oundoneofmyweakspot
s.
"
Answerme.
",
hi
shandssqueezemyt
highs.
Ipul
lhisfaceandkisshi
m.Somet i
mesi fyouwant
somethingdoneyouhavetodoi ty
ourself
.Hishand
goesundermyshirtandherunshi shandi nthe
middl
eofmybackandIshi v
er .Heuncli
psmybr a
andhelpsmeoutofi t
.Hishandt hangrabsmyboob
whil
ehisthumbrubsmyni pple.Hisotherhands
unbot
tonsandunzi
psmyjeans.Il
i
kewher
ethi
sis
goi
ng.Thehoeinmeisy
odelli
ng.
"
Room?
",
heaskski
ssi
ngmyneck.
"
No.Ri
ghther
e."
,Iunt
iehi
ssweat
pant
s.
"
Finebyme.
",Ndabenkhul
u.
Isneakmyhandinsi
dehispantsandmylit
tl
ehand
can'
tevenholdhi
mfull
yin.Imassagehi
sball
sand
hegroans.[
REMOVED]

KUHLEKONKE
"
Thatshoul
ddoi t
.Tol
dy ounott
opulltoohar
don
t
hehandcuff
s."
,Bheki
khayasaysext
racti
nghi
shand.
Ianal
ysemywr ist
sandthey
'r
ered.Theoi
ntmenthe
j
ustboughthelpssoot
hetheit
chi
ness.Hest
art
s
dri
vi
ngwhistl
ing.
"Inevergott
othankyouforgivi
ngmeachancet o
bemyownper son.I
'
mr enovat
ingathomeandcan
final
lyt
akeAmandat othatBoardi
ngSchoolFor
Chef si
nCapeTownsheal wayswantedwithout
stressi
ngaboutouri
nherit
ancemoneyrunningout
."
,I
sayki
ssi
nghi
m att
her
edl
i
ght
.
"I
'm gl
adyouuseditwell
.You'r
etaki
ngAmandato
boardi
ngschool
?",heaskslooki
ngatmebefor
e
focusi
ngontheroad.
"
Yeah.Sheinsisted.Sheal
wayswant
edt
oat
tend
t
here.
",
Isaytakinghisphone.
"
ManNkosi
nat
hii
sgonnal
osei
t.
",
Bheki
khay
a
"I
tsl
i
fe.It
hinkAmandai
sal
sor
unni
ngawayf
rom
hi
m."
HenodsandIt
akepi
ctur
eswi
thhi
sphone.
"Hey.I
ncl
udemeinthepi
ctur
es.
",hesay
spar
king
outsi
demyhouse.
"
Khay
a."
,Isaymov
ingt
hephone.
Igi
vehi
m hi
sphonebackandweki
ss.
"
GreetAmandaandSanel
eforme.Ihaveameet
ing
i
nanhour.I'
l
lseet
hem af
ter
."
,hesayski
ssi
ngmy
f
orehead.
"Sui
tslooksgoodony ou.Sexi
er.
",Icl
oset
hedoor
andblowhim akiss.
If
indt
heki
dswat
chi
ngamov
ieeat
ingpopcor
n.
"
Hey.Noxai
n'
tbacky
et?
",Iasksi
tt
ingi
nbet
ween
t
hem.
"
Nope.
",t
heygetbackt
owat
chi
ngTV.
I
'mreall
yti
redsi nceIdidn'
tsleepmuchwi thmyZul u
Chri
sti
anGr eyhav i
ngmecr yi
ngwi thorgasms.Isti
ll
havetofi
ndapr esentf
orhim.Hi sbir
thdayisi
na
weekandIam gi f
tsearchi
ng.Beinginloveisthe
mostgreatestthingeverespecial
lyofyou'r
einlove
wit
hsomeonewhof eel'
sthesameway .
45
LANGALAKHE
Ilookatherdr essedi
nhersangomacl othsasshe
kneelsinf rontofhermot her
sgrave.Sheisclappi
ng
andgr untingwhi l
etheincensesmoker ai
singupto
thesky .Iseehersmi leandstandsupdustingher
kneesandwal kstowardsus.
"
Sheagr
eed.
",shesay
shuggi
ngme.
"
Kuhl
endodakazi
."
,herf
athersay
ssmi
l
ing.
"Shesaysshe'sgoi
ngt oshowmet heway .Let
'sgo
homef i
rstandwe'l
lleaveintwoday s.
",
shesays
putt
ingherancestr
al bagoverhershoulder.
Wegetint
hecarandIdr
iveoutoft
hecemeter
y.I
'
m
gl
adshe'
sget
ti
ngsomewherewithherj
our
ney.
"
Imi
ssedmyki
ds.Letmecal
lThando.
",Uny
ezi
"
I'
m gl
adwe'
regoi
nghome.
",Isaysmi
l
ingather
.
Herf
atheri
sasleepi
nthebackseat
.Hemustbe
t
ir
ed.We'vebeenwaki
ngupdawn.
"
Iam soexhaust
ed.Wannadr
ive?
",Iaskher
.
"
Okay
.We'
l
ltaket
urnsal
ongt
heway
.",
Uny
ezi
.
Istoponthesideoftheroadandweexchangeseats.
Shepecksmyl ipsandstart
sthecar.Ir
egr
etthe
decisi
onofmaki ngherdri
vewhensheboltsonthe
road.Ifor
gott
hisonet hi
nksshe'
sinaracecour
se.
"Uny
ezi
.Ufunaukusi
bhodisa?"(
Youwantt
oki
l
lus?
),I
askmaki
ngsuremyseat belti
ssecur
e.
"
Langa.Lal
a."(
Sleep.
),
shesay
sst
eppi
ngont
hegas.
Isighindefeatandlowermyseat .Il
ookather
beforeclosi
ngmyey es.Ifal
linlov ewit
hher
everyday.She'
ssti
llt
hecenterofmyuni ver
se.I'
m
happyt obewithheronherspi r
itualj
ourney.Iputmy
handonhert highandfall
asleep.

KHULEKANI
Tshegoisl
aughi
ngatmeasIt
ell
herwhatIj
ust
wentthr
ough.
"
Ihav
ebadl
uckIswear
."
,Isaydr
inki
ngm beer
.
"
Soy ouj
ustt
ookt
hepot
s?Khul
ekani
no!
",Tshego
l
aughsagai
n.
"Thi
sisnotfunnySeho.Therewereclot
hesont he
barstool
sthi
ssideI'
m surroundedbymoaning.I
grabbedwhatIcamef orandran."
,It
ell
her
.
"I
fit
snotyourfatheri
tsyourbrot
her
?Wow!You
needtobecleansed."
,Tshego
"
Honest
ly.
"
We' r
esi
tti
ngont hecouchfull
watchingsome
romcom onNet f
lixTshegochose.She'slyi
ngon
chestandplayi
ngwi thfi
nger
s.Thereissomeheav y
kissi
nginthi
smov i
eandIkeeponl ookingatherl
i
ps.
"
I'
m comi
ng.
",Isayst
andi
ngup.
"
Okay
.",
shehasherf
ocusont
hemov
ie.
Ili
ghtmyci garett
eandsmokewhi l
etakingoutsome
snacks.Wher earemychocol at
ebiscuit
s?Ah. ha
thereyouare.Iputoutt hecigaret
teandt akeoffmy
shirtcauseitsmellsoftobaccoandTshegohas
sinuses.Icarr
yev ery
thi
ngt otheTVr oom.I '
m
thinki
ngofhav ingacinemai nstal
l
edinmyhouse.
"
Snacksmal
ady
.",
Isayput
ti
ngev
ery
thi
ngdown.
Shegr
absapacketandl
ooksupatme.Herey
es
st
artanal
ysi
ngmeandshecl
ear
shert
hroat
.
"
Nicet
att
oos.
",shesay
slooki
ngatmyv
-li
ne.
"
Niceneh?
",Iaskf
oldi
ngmyar
mssmi
rki
ng.
"
Ver
yni
ce.
",herey
esey
emyt
runkandIl
augh.
"
Okay
.St
opundr
essi
ngme.
",Isaysi
tt
ingnextt
oher
.
Shesucksherteet
handpushesmebutendsup
keepi
ngherhandonmychest .Shetr
acesi
tdownt
o
myabsandIhol dherhandwhenitgoesl
ower.
"
Ookay
.",
Isayt
aki
ngherhandaway
.
Shelooksatmewi
thherl
owerl
i
pst
uckoutwhi
l
e
bl
inki
ng.
"
Whatdoy
ouwant
?",
Iaskey
eingher
.
"
YouknowwhatIwant
."
,Tshego
"
NoIdon'
t.
"
"Shoul
dIshowy
ouwhatIwant
?",
sheasks
seduct
ivel
y.
"
Ify
oumay
.",
Isayl
ayi
ngbackont
hecouch.
Shecl
i
mbsont
opofmeandherl
eat
herski
rtgoes
hi
gherexposi
ngcreamythighs.Sheki
sseswhil
eher
handsrubonme.Agr oanescapesmylipsasshe
squeezesmydickthr
oughmysweat pants.
"
Shi
t!Sehowai
t.
",Isaypul
l
ingback.
Sher et
reat
sandIrubmyf ace.Thiswomani skil
li
ng
me.Whi leI
'mtr
yingtogetmyt houghtsincheckshe
grindsonmeandIgr oan.Ichangeourpositi
onand
l
ayont hecouch.She'
swear i
nganov ersi
zedtee
withoutabraandIuntuckitpul
li
ngitoverherhead.I
takeonenippl
einmymout handletitpopout.
"I
fyoudon'
ttel
lmetostopnowIdoubtIwi
l
l.
",It
ell
herunzi
ppi
ngherski
rt
.
"Don'tst
op.
",shesay
sli
ft
ingupherl
egsasIpul
lher
skir
tdown.
Il
ookatherandIl ovethestr
etchmarksonthesi
de
ofherbumsandt highs.Shehasreal
l
ynicethi
ghs
andlegs.Thi
sneedsaphot o.Ipul
loutmyphotoand
shehidesherfaceasIcapturethi
sbeauty
.
"
Khul
ebat
hong.
",shesay
slaughi
ng.
Igeti
nbet
weenhert
highsandt
racel
ovebi
tesi
na
st
rai
ghtli
nefr
om herchestt
il
lhert
orso.Shehasa
l
acethongon.Itwi
sti
tinmyf i
nger
shardenoughfor
i
ttoteari
nhalf
.
"
Khul
ekani
!"
,sheexcl
aims.
Isnapi
tagai
nandi tf
all
sofffrom herbody.She
si
ghsindef
eat.Ir
unmyf ingerdownherv agi
naand
she'
swet.
"
Mmmmh.
",shemoansi
npl
easur
e.
Shepushesmyheadi nasInipathercli
t.Shetast
es
amazing.Hert
highsshakeandshepushesmei n
deeperwhil
eshethrushesar
ound.Il
ickherclean
andshelooksatmeandhercheeksar epink.
"Wai
t.I
'l
lbeback."
,Isayst
andi
ngupandr un
upst
air
s.Itakeoutsomecondomsandr unback
downstai
rs.ShehascondomsinherhandandI
l
augh.
"Youwereprepar
edneh?
",Iaskherget
ti
ngbet
ween
herthi
ghs.
"
Alway
s."
,shesay
stear
ingi
twi
thhert
eet
h.
Sher
oll
sitonmymanhoodandIf
oundi
tsosexy
.
Shegrabsitandi
nser t
sitherselfandIgroanatthe
warmness.Manshe' sti
ght.Shewr apsherlegs
aroundmeandmov esherwai stinsyncwithmine.
She'sper
fect
.Act
ive.Tightandwar m.

NKOSI
NATHI
I
'm checki
ngAmandasst at
us.Shepostedan
Accepti
onlettert
osomeBoardingSchooli
nCape
Town.Icallherandsheanswersaf
terafewri
ngs.
"
Hey
.",
herv
oicechi
mes.
"
Amanda.
",
Iam pi
ssed.
"
What'
swr
ongbr
o?"
,sheaskswor
ryl
acedi
nher
v
oice.
"You'r
echangi
ngschool
s?CapeTown?Andyou
didntevent
ell
me?",
thedi
stast
einmyvoi
cecl
ear.
"
Iwasgoi
ngt
otel
lyou.
"
"
When?
"
"Hayi
Nkosinat
hikant
iyi
ni?
"(What
'swr
ong?
),she
asksannoy
ed.
"Cany
oucomeov
er?Weneedt
otal
k."
,Isaysi
tt
ing
up.
"
I'
m busy
.",
shel
i
est
ome.
"
Ber
eadyi
n45mi
nut
es.
",
Isaydr
oppi
ngt
hecal
l
.
Ithoughtwewerefr
iendsandt hel
eastshecoul
ddo
wast el
lmeshe'
sleaving.Iwearaj
acketwhil
e
shir
tl
essandrundownst ai
rs.
"
Aunt
y."
,Isayki
ssi
nghercheek.
Iki
ssNkany
ezi
scheekandhel
aughs.
"Yourmom andDadarecomi
ngback.
",shesay
s
handingmeasandwich.
"Okay
.I'l
lbeoutf
orawhi
l
e."
,It
akeabi
teoft
he
sandwich.
Irunbackt
omyr oom andtakeuncl
eKhulekani
sold
apart
mentkeys.I
tsminenowbutIcanonlymov e
outwhenI'
m 18.Iaskthedr
ivert
odri
vetoAmandas
pl
ace.
It
exthert
hatI
'
m out
sideandshebl
uet
icksme.
"
I'
ll
knocki
fyoudon'
tcomeout
."
,It
exther
.
Iseeheropent
hegateandapproachest
hecar.I
openthedoorf
rom t
heinsi
deandshejumpsin.
"
Real
l
yNkosi
nat
hi?
",sheaskspi
ssed.
"Weneedtot
alk.You'
vebeenav
oidi
ngme.Ihadt
o."
,
Isaysmi
li
ng.
Shecli
ckshert ongueandf oldsherar ms.It el
lthe
driv
ertotakeust otheapar tmentandshegi vesme
thesti
nkey e.I
tsasilentridei nthecarwi thheron
thephone.Wegetoutandcl imbt hest ai
rstill
we
reachthedoor.Ionlycomeher ewhenIneedsome
ti
meal one.Langaisalway swi t
hPl ut
oorSanel e.I
j
ustcomeher etogethi ghandpl ayvideogames.I
l
ightajointwhil
ethrowi ngmy selfont hebed.I tsa
bachel
orapar t
mentsoev erythingi snear .Amanda
sit
sont hecouchandf oldherf eet.She' sreall
y
beauti
fulandtherealestf r
iendI '
veev erhad.Shehas
dreamsandgoal s.
"
Comesi
ther
e."
,Isaypat
ti
ngt
hespacenextt
ome.
"
No.Whatdi
dyouwantust
otal
kabout
?"
"
Whyar
eyour
unni
ngaway
?"
"
WhosaidI'
mrunningaway?From what
?",
sheasks
t
hrowi
ngherhandsintheai
r.
"Fr
om me.Goingt
oCapeTownwon' trev
ersewhat
happenedbet
weenus.
",Isaysi
tt
ingup.
"Notev
eryt
hingi
sabouty
ouNkosi
nat
hi!
",sher
aises
hervoi
ce.
"Ungangi
bangeliumsindomi naAmanda.
Ngikhul
umakahl enawewenaungi khuphulel
aizi.
Ngazongidi
nawena."( Don'
tmakenoi se.Imt al
ki
ng
nicel
ytoyouandy ou'
rer ai
singyourvoice.Dont
annoyme. )
,Isayput
ti
ngt hejointout
.
Ihatenoi
seandi
tagi
tat
esmewhensomeoner
aises
thei
rvoi
ceatmeandsheknowsi
t.
"
Nowwhenar
eyoul
eav
ing?
",Iaskhercal
mly
.
"Nexty
ear.They'
rewaiti
ngformyfinalrepor
tandI
canbegivenmyr oom numberandt henecessi
ti
es.
",
shesaysplayi
ngwithherfi
ngers.
"
I'
m goi
ngt
omi
ssy
ou.
",Ihonest
lysay
.
"
Met
oobutt
hisi
sformyf
utur
e."
,Amanda
"
Comeher
e."
,Iext
endmyhand.
Shestandsupandwal kstowardsme.Imoveupand
l
aybackandshel aysonmychest .I
'
vehadti
meto
thi
nkevery
thi
ngthroughandIdol ov
eAmandabut
ther
eisa40%chanceaf t
ershecomesbackfr
om
CapeTownwecanst i
llcl
ick.
"Didyout
elly
oursi
sterwher
eyouwer
egoi
ng?
",Iask
playi
ngwit
hherhai
r.
Shenods.
"
I'
m sur
eshehat
esme.
"
"Notreal
l
y.Sheisnotev enent
ert
aini
ngi
t.Shetook
met othedoctorlastweekandgotmeon
contr
acepti
ves.Itwassoembar r
assi
ng.
",shesays
coveri
ngherface.
"
Yoursi
steri
scr
azybutcool
."
"She'
sworsewhenshe'
swi
thNoxol
o.Psy
chos.
",she
shakesherhead.
"
You'
venev
erbeeni
noner
oom wi
thmyf
ami
l
y."
"
Fami
l
yiscool
thou.
",shesay
ssmi
l
ing.
Inodtur
ningusov
erandget
ti
ngi
nbet
weenher
thi
ghs.
"
Nat
hi.
"
"
Yes?
"
Sheshakesherheadandkissesme.I
'
m gladshe'
s
weari
ngadresscauseIal
readyhavei
ttossed
acr
osstheroom.

NDABENKHULU
Il
ookatherasshe'
sasl
eep.Herey
esf
lat
teropen
andshesi
tsupwipi
nghereyes.
"
Hey
.",
Igr
eetki
ssi
nghershoul
der
.
"
Hey
.",
shey
awnsout
.
"Imadelunch.Shower.Yourcl
othesareont
heli
ne
sopicksomef rom mycloset
.There'
sanext
ra
toot
hbrushinthecabi
net."
Shenodsandget soutbedst i
l
lhalfasl
eep.Ican'
t
helpl
ookingatherbut tassheheadst othe
bathr
oom.Gi r
listhick.Ichanget hesheetsandgo
dishupforus.GuessKhul ekanicameandt ookhi
s
foodwithmypot sandI 'l
lnevergetthem back
knowingthati
diot.IremindThandot otakeherpi
ll
s.
We'r
eplanningonaski ngheraboutthi
sSthembiso
Mthethwalatert
onight.Theyrej
ecti
ngmyi deaof
ki
ll
i
nghi m soI'
ml et
ti
ngt hem t
rytosol
vethis.
Noxolocomesdowni nmyT- shi
rtandherbirt
hmark
onherthighisbeauti
ful.
"
Comeher
e."
,Isaypul
l
inghert
ome.
"
I'
m sohungr
y."
,shecompl
ains.
Il
i
ftherupandputheront
hecount
er.
"
Take.
",Ihandherpl
ate.
"
Thanky
ou.
",sheki
ssesme.
Isi
tont
hebar
stool
inf
rontofher
.
"Gi
vemeyourl
efthand.
",Isaysear
chi
ngi
nmy
pocket
.
Sheplacesi
tinmyhandandIsl
idet
hesi
l
ver
engagementri
ngwi
thapinkdi
amond.
"
Wer
eyouser
ious?
",sheasksl
ooki
ngati
t.
"
Yes.I
'
mtoool
dforgames.
"
"
I.
..Whendi
dIsayy
esagai
n?"
,sheaskst
ouchi
ng
t
hediamond.
"
Wheny
ouwer
eunderme.
",Isayki
ssi
nghert
high.
"
Iwasn'
tagr
eei
ng.
..I
..
.YohNdabe.
",shel
aughs.
"
Im asmar
tman.Al
way
sgetmyway
."
"
I'
mtaki
ngahugest
epi
fIagr
eet
othi
s."
,Noxol
o.
"
Ngi
yakut
handa.
",It
ell
hersi
ncer
ely
.
"
Nami
ngi
yakut
handa.
",shesay
sget
ti
ngemot
ional
.
"
Xol
oha.
a",
Iwi
pehert
ear
s.
"
I'
m sorr
y.I
'
mjust
..
.Ican'
tbel
i
evet
his.I
'
m scar
ed
t
hou."
,shel
et'
smein.
"
Iunderstandthat
.Ipromisetoneverl
i
ftahandon
you.Iwasraisedwell
.PlusI'
m nott
ooldtogeta
whoopingfrom Dad.
",It
ellherki
ssi
nghercheeks.
Sheoncetol
dmeaboutherprev
iousr
elat
ionshi
p
event
houghIal
readyknewandwasdeali
ngwi t
h
hi
m.
"
Stopcr
ying.I
tsokay
.",
Iembr
aceher
.
Not
hingmakesmeasangryasamant hatabusesa
woman.I
fyoufeel
youcan'
tcontr
oly
ouremot i
ons
t
hangetout
.Getasmoke.Getsomeair.Comeback
cal
merandtal
kitout
.Noneedt
ousey
ourst
rengt
h
tohur
ther
.It
spathet
ic.
46
UNYEZI
'
FALLOFTHETHRONE'
Westandout
sidel
ooki
ngatwhati
scal
l
edt
heRoy
al
Pal
ace.
"Didyourancest
orstel
lyouaboutthis?
",Langaasks
picki
ngupt heashandquickl
ylet
'sitgo.
"
Nothi
ng.Imayhavefeltdet
achedwhenwecr ossed
t
heborderbutIdi
dn'
ttakemuchint
oit.
",Isay
l
ooki
ngaround.
"Whathappened?Wher
ear
ethepeopl
e?"
,Langa
asks.
"
Idon'
tknow.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sgone.
",Isay
.
Ali
ghtcatchesmysightandIheadtowardst
he
br
ight
ness.It'
sacr
own.Itouchitanditgl
ows.

Iwakeupheav
ingandthef
eeli
ngofdet
achment
makingmegri
patmychest.Iwhi
zzasIcoughand
feel
asifmyai
rwayiscl
osi
ngup.
"
Langa!
",Icoughout
.
If
all
from t
hebedandt
ear
sdr
ipdownont
othef
loor
.
"Uny
ezi
!What
'swr
ong.
!"
,Langashout
spi
cki
ngme
up.
"
Imphepho!
",Imoant
hroughmypai
n.
Herunst
hroughourhouseandput
smedownont
he
f
loor
.
"
Laymeont opofthewhi
tecl
oth.
",It
ell
him asIf
eel
myjoi
ntsst
if
fen.
"Laymyheadont heblueandredcloth.
",ascr
eam
escapesmydr yl
ipsasIfeelanexcruci
ati
ngpain
ri
pplethr
oughoutmybody .
"Putthecl
othwit
hthef
aceofKingSwati
ontopof
me.",Ior
derhi
m asmybodyseemstohavel
osti
ts
sensati
on.
HedoesasIsayandIf eelacruci
alpainoff i
retr
avel
thr
oughmyv einsandIscream.Langalights
i
mphephoandmakesmesni f
fsnuffandIf eelt
he
pai
nlessenbutitsst
il
lther
ejustt
oler
abl e.If
eel
manypresencesatonceandaheadachemakesme
gr
unt
.
"
THETHRONEHASFALLEN!ASHESTOASHES!
",
t
hesewor
dsar
echant
ed.
They'r
etool oudandthey'r
ecomi ngforwardal
lat
once.Ifeelsomethingdriponmyhand.Iwi pemy
noseandcomebackwi thblood.Langatri
eswalki
ng
towardsmebutIshakemyhead.It hrowthe
crushedherbf r
om myancest ralbagandpourit
i
nsidetheseawat erfil
l
edbowl .Whatseemsli
kea
RoyalYardisonf i
rewithpeopl etor
chingi
tinanger
.
I'
veseent hi
splaceinmydr eams.
"
No!No!No!Noooooo!
",Iscr
eam r
eal
i
singmyf
ail
ure.
Ifail
ed!Iwassocaughtuponmymot herspastI
forgotmyquest.Myheadt hrobsasIlayonthe
ground.Theroom goesdarkandIshiverasachi l
l
runsthroughmyspine.Langaisstandingquiet
lyi
n
thecornerobl
ivi
oustothefigurei
nther oom.
"
Unyezi.Ourthr
onehasf allen.Burnttothegr ound.
Goretr
ievethecrown.Al eadery ou'
l
l bearwill
r
estor
ewhat 'sf
allen.
",t
hegl owingfigurekneelsin
fr
ontofmegi vi
ngmeacl earlookofherf ace.
"
Gogo?I
'
m sor
ry!I
t'
smyf
aul
t.
",Isaycr
ying.
Theheadachei
smaki
ngmedi
zzy
.
"Whatyou'
vebeengif
tedwil
lbetaken.Wai
ti
ngtobe
giv
entotheFutur
e."
,shesaysasherhandtouches
myhead.
Ifal
lbackasIf eelempty.No.Theycan'
tpuni
shme
l
ikethis.Theycan'
ttakemygi f
t.Thefeel
i
ngof
anothersoulwithi
nmei sabsent.
"
No.
",Isayf
aint
ly.
Langapicksmeupandwi pesmynosebef
oret
aking
met oourroom.If
eelli
keapartofmei
smissi
ng.I
cl
awatmychestscr eaming.

KUHLEKONKE
Ivomi tagai
nandl aymyheadagai nstthewal
lasI
sitont hebat
hroom fl
oor.I
tsabout09h00am andI
feell
ikedeath.Istandupandf l
ush.Ibrushmyteeth
andlookatmy sel
finthemirr
or.Myey esareswol
len
andmycheeksar epink.Iwashmyf aceandgot o
thekitchenwhileonmyphone.Bheki khayasvi
deo
callcomest hrough.Icl ickmyt ongueandr ej
ectit.I
opent hefri
dgeandIst artcry i
ng.I sthiswhatmyl if
e
willbe?Waki ngupear l
ypuki ngandf eelingl i
kehel l
?
IhateBhekikhay a!It akel astnightsl eftoversand
warmt hem.Iwal kbackt omyr oom eat ing.The
pregnancytestont hebedsi decat chesmyat tenti
on
andIcr yagain.I'vebeensuspect ingt hatImaybe
pregnantsinceImi ssedanappoi nt mentandI 've
beendoi ngitrawwi t
hBheki khay a.Itcameout
Positi
veandI 'vebeenav oidi
nghi m si nce.Ior dered
Amandat onotl ethi min.Ieatbuti tdoesn' tseem t o
godownandIst artcrying.Hecal l
sagai n.Leav eme
al
one!Icr yti
llIfal l
asleep.

NOXOLO
I'
vebeent ryi
ngt ocal
lKuhleandshe'snotanswer i
ng
anyone'scalls.It
ryagai
nandi tri
ngsunanswer ed
again.I
'l
lpassbyherpl acewhenIknockof f.Il
ook
atmyl efthandandsmi le.Manymi ghtsayi
tstoo
soonbuti tfeelsri
ght
.Tshegohasanewmanand
sheisgiv i
ngmet he"
it
st ooearl
ytogopublic."
excuse.Shewashappyf ormeandIwi shKuhlecan
answermycal
l
ssoIcanshar
ethi
swi
thher
.
"
NoSne.I
cei
tthancov
eri
twi
thmoul
d."
,Isay
.
"
Okay
.",
shesay
sner
vousl
y.
She'
snewandshe'ssuchasof t
ie.Igotomyof f
ice
andfindmom t
here.Ihugherbeforesi
tt
ingdown.I
tol
dheraboutt
heengagementandshedi dn'
tev
en
j
udgemewhenIt oldherwewentf rom f
ri
endsto
fi
ances.
"
Mybaby
.",
shesmi
l
es.
"
Youl
ookbeaut
if
ul.
",Isaynot
ici
nghernewf
acel
i
ft.
"
It
sexpensi
vet
rustme.
",shesay
sfl
i
cki
ngherweav
e.
"
Isee.
",Isayt
hankeepqui
et.
We'renotclose.Mom i swhaty oucallaMI LF.She'
s
beenmar ri
ed5t i
mesal readyandi scurrentl
y
marriedt
ot hisguyfrom England.Itseemsgenui ne
butyounev erknowwi thmom.Shedi vorcedDad
andmar r
iedAguer osomer i
chNi ger
ianguyandI
stay
edwi thDadwhol aterdi
edandt of i
ndouthe
wasindebt .Ihadlostcontactwi t
hmymom asshe
wasonhusbandno. 3andIst artedworkingatthe
Str
ipCl ubtof i
nishmystudies.That swher eImet
Kuhle.Wef oundeachotherrecent l
ywhenIbakeda
cakef orher4thhusbandsdaught er.Shejustgot
marriedaf t
er5y ear
sofmar riage.Shepr obablyhas
done13sur geri
es.Shehasi mplantsandt hewor ks.
Shebel iev
esi nDoll
yPartonsol dwor ds"Surgeons
werenotmadesot heycanst arve."
.
"Sohav eyoustartedwitht
heweddi ngpreparations?
Iresearchedyourmanandy outookaftermedar l
ing.
Hei sfi
lthyr
ich.Richert
hananymanI 'veeverbeen
with."
,shesaysf anni
nghersel
fwiththoseChi nese
fans.
"Yeah.Hi
sr i
ch.Idon'
tknowwher et
ostar
t.I
'
venev
er
beenmarriedbefore.
",Isayshr
uggi
ng.
"I
'
vehadmyf ai
rshareofweddi
ngsandIam her
eto
help.
",shesayspul
li
ngoutmagazi
nesfr
om her
Guccihandbag.
"
Thanky
ou.
",Isaygr
abbi
ngone.
"Whatki
ndofdr
essdoy
ouprefer
?",sheasks
poi
nti
ngatacol
umnofbeaut
if
uldresses.
I
'
m gl
adshe'
sher
eformesi
ncemypat
ernal
side
andIdon'tgetal
ongafterDadsdeat
h.Momsf ami
l
y
consi
stsofhousewivesandwedon'tcl
ick.I
'
ma
hoodgirl
anddr i
nki
ngteawithmypinkyoutisa
sham t
ome.

BHEKI
KHAYA
Il
ookatherasshesl eepswi tht
hepregnancytestin
myhand.Amandal etmei ncauseshewaswor r
ied
abouther .She'sbeenav oi
dingmeandr ejecti
ngmy
calls.Iputmyhandonherst omach.I
tsstil
lfl
atandI
smi leandwipeat ear.Theideaofhav i
ngami nime
i
sj ustamazi ng.Il
aynexttoherandhol dher.She's
probabl ygoi
ngt ofl
ipwhenshewakesupbutI
missedher .

AMANDA
Iam wor r
iedaboutmysi ster
.Shehasbeensi ck
l
atelyandv erymoody.Imakesur etostayoutofher
way .She'
llskinmeali
vef orl
ett
ingBhutii
naf t
ershe
orderedmet onotl
ethim oranyoneforthatmatter.
WhenIaskherwhat '
swr ongit
'sl
ikesheturnsinto
theDev i
l
sf emaleversion.Iam practi
cinganew
reci
pe.ItsanIt
aliandishwhi chIcan'tev en
pronounce.Imakei tlookcreativ
eandt akeapi ctur
e.
IpostitonmyI nstagram andWhat sAppst atus.
Cookingismyt alent.Theonl yt
imeIf eel speci
al.It
's
onethingIcannev erlivewithout.

KHULEKANI
Ireadovert
hefil
eagai nonTshego.I'
mj ustdoi nga
normalbackgr
oundcheck.She' scl
ean.Herf ather
thou.Hi
sav er
y'dangerous'
man.Hi sintohuman
traf
fi
cki
nganddr ugsmuggling.Ihaverecordsofhis
phonecall
sandt ext
s.Iknowhedi sownedTshego
andwhyshehasn' tsharedt
hiswithmeIdon' tknow.
"
Khabazel
a."
,Ical
lout
.
Hecomesinandstandinfr
ontofmydesk.I'
m about
t
oratt
lesomeone'
scage.Ihandhi
mthetaleandfil
e.
"
Handt
hisov
ert
otheaut
hor
it
ies.
"
Henodsandheadsf
ort
hedoor
.
"
Notj
ustany
one.Makesur
eitendsuponDet
ect
ive
Smi
th.
"
HegoesoutandIsitbackonmychair.Serame
Thangohasahugest or
m cominghi
sway .Bei
ng
partofpol
it
icswon'
thel
phim whenDect.
Smi t
his
i
nvolved.
47
KUHLEKONKE
Iwakeupt oBhekikhayanexttome.Hissti
llasl
eep
andIl ookathimf orawhil
e.Hisabeauti
ful
specimen.Thi ckeyebr
owsaccompani edbylong
eyelasheswi t
hacut enoseanddarkli
ps.Il
ookat
thePr egnancyTestinhishandandtheanger
resurfacesandIpinchhim causi
nghimt oj
ump.
"
Ouch!Dammi
t!
",hesay
srubbi
nghi
sar
m.
Wemakeey econtactandthestarsgli
mmer
beaut
if
ull
yasconstel
lat
ionsfor
m.Hebl inksandI
l
ookathim ashelooksatthepregnancytesti
nhi
s
hand.
"
Sov el
engizobayit
aima?"(
SoI
'
m goi
ngt
obea
f
ather?
),hesayssmil
ing.
"Yes.Myl i
fepl
ani
sruined.Ihadati
mel
inebut
now...
",Isi
ghasIgetupandt aket
hedi
shtothe
kit
chen.
If
indhi
m seat
edont
hebedpl
ayi
ngwi
thi
t.
"
Ithoughty
ouwer
eont
hepi
l
l.
",hesay
slooki
ngup
atme.
"Iwas.Myli
fehasbeenbusy
.Imissedone
appoint
mentandevery
thi
ngwentdownhil
l
.",
Isay
sit
ti
ngnexttohi
m.
"Whatareyousoafr
aidof
f?Icanseet
hef
eari
nyour
eyes.
",hesay
sholdi
ngmyhand.
"Bei
ngamom.I t
snotsomet hi
ngyoucangoto
schoolfor.Gr
aduate.Becomeapr o.Youdon'
tst
udy
i
t."
,Isayinter
twi
ningourfinger
s.
"You'
vebeenabletotakecar
eofAmandaaf
tery
our
parent
sdied.
",Bheki
khaya
"Asasist
er.Notamom.Thisonechanges
ever
ythi
ng.ManMom probabl
yisdi
sappoint
edin
me."
,Isayrubbi
ngmyeyesastheystar
ttosti
ng.
"
I'
ll
beheretosupporty
ou.I
'
llhel
p.I
tsmybabyas
well
."
,hesay
skissi
ngmyhands.
"
Mmmmh.
",Ihum l
ayi
ngmyheadonhi
sshoul
der
.
Iguesshi
spr esencecal
medt hestorminme.Ihad
plannedt
ocast r
atehim butIguessnotev
ery
t hi
ng
goesasplanned.Heplaceshishandonmyf lat
stomachandIplacemi neonhis.Thisi
snothowI
plannedhavi
ngmyf i
rstchi
ld.Heck!Idi
dn'
tevenpl
an
tohav eoneatal
l
.

UNYEZI
"Thinkposi t
ive.Wecanf ocusonusmor e.Focuson
yourself.Youhav el
ostt
ouchwi t
hr eal
i
tywi t
halways
beingst uckbet weenthetwowor l
ds.Don'tseeitas
apuni shmentbutasagi ft
.Areversedgift
.You'l
lbe
abletohav emor eti
mef orourki
ds.Most l
yme. "
,
Langasay sasIl ayonhischest.
I
'
m angry.Theyal
waysgivi
ngmeandwhenIgrasp
t
heytakeawayagain.I
tssi
ckeni
ng.Al
i
ttl
epr
ayer
f
lashest
hroughmymi nd.
"God.Don'
teverbl
essmewit
hadaught
er.Ever
!Cut
offtheSosi
boQueendom.Makesur
eIwasthelast
one.Amen."
Heki
ssesmyheadandt
akesmyhandi
nhi
s.
"
Ilov
ey ou.You'
l
lal
way
sbemyQueen.
",Langasay
s
t
enderl
y.
Ifeelast rongwav eofemot ionsbusti
nme.Lov e
themost .Mychestwar msupandt ear
sfil
lmyeyes
asmyl ovespr eadst hroughoutmybodyandIhear
ourhear tbeatsbeati nsy ncli
keabeauti
full
ymade
songofdi ffer
entinstruments.ThelongerIl
ist
enthe
mor eIf alli
nlovewi ththissong.Asongonl ymeand
himt oget hercanev erhav e.
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
",Isaysnuggl
i
ngi
ntohi
m.
Hepul
lsmecloserandIsniffhi
sscentandIsmi l
eat
hi
smanlybutsweetcolognemixedwithaft
ershave.
Theworl
dismi ssi
ngoutonsomebeaut i
fult
hing.
Lovei
sbeauti
ful.

TSHEGOFATSO
Iam l
ookingatthenewsst unnedasIseemyDad
bei
ngpushedi nsi
deapol icev an.Hismaki ng
headl
inesandIam surprisedatt heallegati
ons.He
wasintohumant r
affi
cking.Bi l
er ai
sesontomy
thr
oatasIt hi
nkofthemanIcal ledaFat hersel
li
ng
humansf ormoney.Doesheknowt heamountof
pai
nbehascausedt ofami li
es?Leav i
ngmot her'
s
brokenwi ththerealitythatthei
rdaughter
shav e
becomeanot hervictim ofgreedymen.Icani magine
thescar edlooksont hevict
imsbeingauctionedt o
thehighestbidder.Hav i
ngoldmenf indi
ng
debaucher yinyourf earsomesoul andgetti
ng
erectionsfrom yourpai nful
screamsofhor ror.I
shakemyheadashat eandangerov er
whelm me.I ts
anugl ywor dandIt akemyphoneandgol i
v eon
Instagram.Ihopemymessagei sheardoutt here.
"Heyguys.Ihaveli
vedal lmyli
fecal
lingahear t
less
andgreedyman' Dad'withoutt
heknowl edgeofhi s
mali
ciousacti
ons.SerameThangoi samanIcal l
ed
'
Dad'mywhol elif
e.Afterseei
ngthenewst odayI
real
i
sedtheonl ymanIt houghtIwassaf earound
wasactuall
ymygr eatestdanger.
..
",Icl
osemyey es
andsighbeforecarr
yingon.
We'renotsafeany
more.Guessyoucannev erknow
someonet hatwel
l
.MyheartachesandIcan'thelp
butwonderhowmom i sdoi
nginalloft
his.Will
she
reachouttomesinceDadmaybegoi ngtojail
?
NDABENKHULU
Ilookatherasshegoesonaboutt heweddingplans
andshe' sbeautif
ul.Sheoccasionall
ybitesherli
ps
withoutreali
singshe'sdoingit.Herbeauti
fuldark
skinradiat
ingbeaut i
full
yunderthelit
tl
esunshine
comi ngthroughthewi ndow.Herbeaut i
fulcani
ne
teethasshesmi l
eswi dely.I
'
veneverseenhert hi
s
happy .Hereyesar eglowingwi t
hpositi
veemot i
ons.
Herener gyisaddicti
veandmakesmef eelli
kealove
struckteenageragain.
"It
hinkaBl
ackdr
esswi
l
ldo.
",shesay
sget
ti
ngme
outofmytr
ance.
"
Abl
ackdr
ess?
",Iask.
"Yes.It
sabeaut i
fulcol
our.Mom saysI'
m cr
azybutI
l
ov ethi
sblackmer maiddress.Iwaswatchi
ngSay
YesToTheDr essEarli
erandifIcanhavemydress
designedbyRandy .
",shesaysdreamly.
"Wellt
hatcanbear
ranged.
",Isayt
aki
ngal
ookatt
he
dress.
Idon'
treal
l
ycar
ewhatcolourordr
essshewears.
Shecancomedressedi
nragsandI'dst
il
lst
and
t
her
eont
hatal
terandsay'
Ido'
wit
hpr
ide.
"
Youl
ovej
oki
ngar
ound.
",shewav
esmeof
flaughi
ng.
Shet
hinksI
'
mjoki
ng?Icanar
ranget
hatt
obedone.
"
I'
m ser
ious.
",
Isayl
ooki
ngather
.
"We'
ret
alki
ngaboutKl
einf
ordBri
dal
Bouti
quehere."
,
shesay
schuckl
ingandpagesthr
oughhermagazine.
Iguessshedoesn'
tbel
i
eveme.I
'
llpr
oveherwr
ong
anyway.
"CanIgetsomeatt
ent
ionnow?
",Isaypi
cki
ngherup
andmakinghersi
tonme.
ShesmilesandIpull hercloserbyherfi
rm butt
.We
i
nchclosertoeachot herasourl i
psconnectanda
hi
m comesf rom her.Ican'tseem toimaginel
if
e
wit
houther.Ifeelmybl oodrushandIget
goosebumpsandat inglysensati
oninmyst omach
andIsmileintothekiss.Iwouldn'taskforany
thing
el
sethanthiswoman.
NKOSI
NATHI
Ilookatt hepianoandIbr ushi twi thmyf i
nger s.I
haven'tdoneal otoft hingsi nal ongt i
me.Pl aying
thepianooneoft hem.Isi tdownandabsor bt he
quietandpeacef ul aura.IcanhearLangapl ay i
ng
carsint hepassage.Momsdi sti
nctsi ngi
ngt o
Nkany ezi asDadsl oudv oicetalksov erthephone.I
playthef irstkeyandIcl osemyey es.Myf i
nger s
playaf ami li
arsongandIl etthememor i
espl ayout
slowly.Momssi t
tingnextt omewi thDadwhi le
Langacr awlsont hef l
oor .Iopenmymout hasIsi ng
Dadsf av orit
esong.
"DearGodi fyoul
isteningnow.Ineedyoudoat hi
ng
forme.Youseemybabyshedoneupandwal ked
out.Ineedy oubr
ingherbackt ome.IknowIwas
wrong.Iwasgui l
tyofsi n.Pr
obabl
ynotforal
lher
tears.DearGod..
."
,Isingoutwithmyey escl
osed.
Dadstil
ll
ov esthi
ssongandIst i
ll
woul dlikethe
stor
ybehindi t
.Heari
ngmyownv oiceaftersolong
gavemeshi versandIcouldn'
thel
pbutf eel l
i
keIam
i
mpor t
ant.ItsbeensolongsinceIsangandi tf
eel
s
l
ikeI'
m discoveri
ngitf
orthefir
stti
meal loveragai
n.
Ipl
ayanot
hersong.Ismil
er emember
inghowMom
usedtosi
ngthi
ssongaf t
ersheandDadf ought
.She
hadthemostbeaut
iful
voice.It
ookaf
terher.
"
Thisisstupid.I
'm notst
upid.Don'tt alktomelike
I
'
m stupid.Isti
ll
loveyoubutIj ustcan' tdot
his.I
maybedumbbutI '
m notstupid...
",Isingoutl
oud
f
orget
tingthatI'
m notaloneint hehouse.
Singingmakesmef eelgoodandIhav en'tfeltgood
i
nal ongtimenotaf terwhatIsaw.Isingl ouderasI
tr
ynott othinkaboutthepast.Ifeel
at earescape
myshutey esandIdon' tbotherwipi
ngi t
.Itsmyown
l
ittl
esecret.Eventhoughithurt
sknowi ngi t
somet i
mes.
48
UNYEZI
Isatdownwat chi
ngt hevideoItookofNkosinathi
.
SinceIhavebeenwi t
hLangaInev erknewhecould
playthepi
anonei therdidIknowhehadsucha
power f
ulvoice.Henev ermentioneditandsodid
anyone.Ithoughthist al
entwassoccer .I
tsbeen
dayssinceIhav ehear dhim si
ngingandIstil
lam
amazed.Langawal kedinasIwassmi li
ngonmy
phone.
"
Nkosinat
hiisgoi
ngtotakemywife.Ever
ydayyou'
re
watchi
ngthatvi
deo.
",hesai
dchuckl
ingki
ssingmy
f
orehead.
"
I'
mjustsur
pri
sed.
",Isai
dput
ti
ngmyphonedown.
"Whynotaskhi mtosingfory
ou?Hisdownstai
rs.
Hiskindofpissedt
hou.Amandaisnotansweri
ng
hiscall
s."
,hesayssucki
ngonmyneck.
"
Mmmmmh.
",Imoanout
.
Helaysusdownandget
sinbet
weenmythi
ghs
r
ubbinghi
shardononme.Henibbl
esmyneckand
sneakshi
shandi
nbet
weenmyt
highs.
"
You'
resowet
."
,hegr
oansdi
ppi
nghi
sfi
ngeri
nsi
de
me.
Hesti
l
lhasthi
seff
ectonme.Hecanst
il
lgi
vemean
or
gasm j
ustbysmil
ing.

BHEKI
KHAYA
Ihandhert
hepeanutbut
terandpolonysandwi
ch.
Shetakesabit
eandmoans.IthankyouGodIam
noteati
ngthat
.
"Whyareyoul
ooki
ngatmel
i
ket
hat
?",
sheaskswi
th
annoy
ance.
"
Uh.
..Sor
ry?
",Isaysmi
l
ingawkwar
dly
.
Sheput
sherf
eetont
opofmyt
highsandhandsher
sandwi
cht
ome.
"
Nobaby
.Eat
.I'
m okay
.",
Imov
emyf
aceaway
.
"
Comeon.I
tsnott
hatbad.
",shepr
esses.
Isi
ghandtakeabi
teandchew.Ismi
l
eandshenods
eager
ly.
"OkayIadmi
t.I
tsnotasbadasIt
hought
."
,Isay
smili
ng.
Shest r
etchesherhandt owardsmeandwi pesthe
cornerofmymout hwithherthumb.Iholdherhand
andsuckhert humbmai ntai
ningeyecontact
.She
sucksinabr eat heandIletherthumbpopoutofmy
mout h.IsmileatherasInot i
cehertakeshall
ow
breathsandt ryingtocontr
olheranimal
attr
action(l
ust).Irunmyhandonhert highand
squeezei tali
ttlebit
.
"
Mmmmh.
",shemoanssof
tl
y.
Ifeel
mymanhoodgetf i
rmerandIremovemyhand
fr
om herthi
ghs.Sher
unshertoesovermydi
ckandI
holdherf
oot.
"
Hay
imahnKuhl
e."
,Ihol
dherf
ooti
npl
ace.
"
ButI
'
m hor
ny.
",shewhi
nes.
"Yousai
dweshouldhol
dbackonthesexunt
ilwe
askthedoct
ori
fit
sfi
ne.
",Ir
emindher
.
Itol
dherthebabywil
lbefineaslongasI'
m gent
le
butshedoesn'
twanttotakechances.Iev
enmade
Uny
ezi
tel
lherbutshest
andsonherpoi
nt.
"
You'
l
lbegent
ler
ight
?",
sheaskssi
tt
ingont
opofme.
BeforeIcansayanythi
ngshekissesme.Ilikehow
shetakeschargelat
elybutmydomi nantsi
desti
ll
overpowershers.
"
Fuck!
",Igr
untasshesqueezesmybal
l
s.
Thiswomanisgoi
ngtodri
vemecr
azy
.I'
m hav
ing
herri
ghther
eonthi
scouch.

NOXOLO
Ilookatthem asNdabenkhul uteachesSanel eabout
bluepri
nts.Thi
smanknowsabi tofev eryt
hing.His
thetypethatcantellyouwhatkindofwoodachai r
i
smadeofandwhodi scoveredi
t.Itakeapi ct
ureof
them andgobackt ocheckingonthepot s.Cooking
foraChefishar dcauseheknowsi fthechickenain'
t
mar i
natedri
ght.Ifeelhandssnakear oundme.
"
MaSi
l
angwe.
",
hesay
ski
ssi
ngmyshoul
der
.
Icl
oset
hepotandt
urnar
ound.
"
Hi.
",Igr
eethi
m.
"
Hi.
",hegr
eet
ssmi
l
ing.
Il
aymyheadonhi
schestandhel
ayshi
schi
nonmy
head.
"
Imi
ssedy
'al
l
.",
hesay
ski
ssi
ngmyhead.
"Well
we'
l
lbeher
efort
heweekend.
",Isayki
ssi
nghi
s
chest
.
"Sanel
eisagr
eatki
d.I'
m gl
adheisminenow.
",he
sayscausi
ngmetolookatSanel
eacr
ossther
oom.
Ifeel
myt earswellup.Whenhet ol
dmehe' dli
keto
havearelat
ionshi
pwi thSaneleIwasshockedreal
l
y.
Iam happyheiswi l
li
ngt olovemychi
ldandhonestl
y
hehadmyhear tr
ightthere.
"We'
rehavi
ngdinneronSundayatmyDads.
Ever
yonewil
lbetherewit
hthei
rpart
ners.Canyou
comewithme?They '
vebeenwait
ingtomeetyou.
",
hesaysaswepullapart
.
"Yourwholef
ami
lywillbether
e?Whati
fyourDad
doesn'
tli
keme?"
,Isayslappi
nghi
shandasheopens
thepot.
"I
'
m sur
ehewill
.Bakehim Vanil
l
acakewit
h
str
awber
ri
esandhisyours.
",hesay
sgropi
ngmybut
t.
Ikisshischeeksasheexi
tst
heki t
chenashechews
onwi negums.Ilookathi
sbuttanditsfi
rmsand
stern.HelooksatmeandIbit
emyl iplaughi
ng.
"
Stopl
ooki
ngatmybut
t!
",hesay
schuckl
i
ng.
"
Mom!Euw!
",Sanel
esay
slaughi
ng.
Ishrugmyshoul
der
sandj
oint
hem af
tert
urni
ngof
f
thestov
e.

KHULEKANI
Tshego' svideoistr
endi ngandshe' sgett
ingsome
positi
ver eacti
ons.Shehasbeenmedi tat
ingalot
theseday scauseshesay sandIquot e"myspiriti
s
atwarandmypeacei snotasi twas.",herfat
her s
arresttookat oll
onher .Ipromisedt ojoi
nherf or
l
uncht odayandshei scooki ng.Ilookatthe
necklaceIboughtherf orthedinnerwithmyf ami l
y.
It
sar osegol dScarletnecklace.Itwil
lgowel lwith
herskin.At extdist
urbsmyt houghts.
"I
'
m cravi
ngt hattaxi
rankdumpl
i
ngandbeef
stew.
",
hertextsreads.
Ismi
l
eandst
andupt
aki
ngmycarkey
s.
West i
l
ldoenjoytaxir
ankfood.Wespendmostday
s
eati
ngitatthepar
k.Webondov ert
hesmall
est
thi
ngs.Iguesswe'r
enoteati
ngherfoodt
oday.

NKOSI
NATHI
It
ryheragai
nandshef
inal
l
yanswer
sherphone.
"
Amanda.
",myv
oicecr
acksandIr
ubmyey
es.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi?
",shesay
sal
ert
ed.
"
Can-Ineedy
ou.
",Isay
.
"
Arey
ouokay
?",
sheaskswor
ri
edl
y.
"Pleasemeetmeatmyapar
tment
."
,Isay
saf
ter
cleari
ngmythroat
.
"
No.
",shesay
sst
ernl
y.
"
Please.
",Ibegher
.
"
Youcan'
tcal
lmef
orsexev
eryt
imesomet
hingi
s
bot
her
ingy
ou.No.
"
"Ijustneedyout
oholdme.Nosex.Ipr
omi
se.
",It
ry
cleari
ngt hel
umpinmythr
oat
.
"
I'
ll
comei
fonl
yyou'
l
lopenupt
ome.
",sher
easons.
"
Amanda.
"
"
Okay
.By
ethen.
"
"
Amandai
ma.
",Isayhur
ri
edl
y.
"
Yes.
"
"
Okay.Ngi
zokusi
kel
audaba.Ng'
cel
auzwakal
e."
(I
'l
l
t
ell
you.Pl
easecome.)
Shefinal
l
yagr eesandIr
ubmyface.It
hrowmy
phoneont hebedandgoint
othebathr
oom.AsI
'm
abouttostri
pnakedLangaent
ers.
"
Bhut
i.
",hesay
s.
"
Shopoi
."(
Sur
eboy
)
"
Cany
oupl
aywi
thmeandPl
uto?
",heasks.
"
Eishsani
.Lat
er?
"
"
Younev
erpl
aywi
thmeany
mor
e.Youhar
dlyev
en
tal
ktomenow.Youdon'
tl
ovemeany
mor
e."
,he
sayswi
pinghi
seyes.
"
Heyhey.Don'tcry
.Hardepoi
.Ipromiset
omake
t
imeforyou.IknowI'
vebeenisol
atedbutI
'm deal
i
ng
wi
thsomething.
"
"I
'
m sorr
y.Assoonasy
ou'
reokayt
ell
me.Hug?
",he
saysopeni
nghisar
ms.
Thiskidisjustcuteandcari
ng.Igetonmyknees
andhughi m.Imi ssedourbrother
lymoments.I
'
m
alwaysburiedinsomethingthesedays.I
fit
snotmy
thoughtsit
si nsi
deAmanda.Wesepar ateandfi
st
bumpbef oreher unsoutofmyr oom.
"
Stopr
unni
ng!
",Ishoutaf
terhi
m.
Ichuckl
easIentert
hebat
hroom.Ideci
det
otakea
coldoneinst
ead.
49
KUHLEKONKE
Ilookathi m aswesi tatoneofhi sBrot
hers
restaurants.Theinteriordesignismoder nbuty et
tradit
ional.Bheki
khay aisreadinghi smenuwi t
hhis
bottom lipinbetweenhi st
eet handhi sdimplesare
ondi splay.Hiseyebrowsar ef urrowedashe
concent ratesonwhatt oorder.We' r
esitt
ingona
secludedt ableandt hereisabi tofsunli
ghtcomi ng
from thewi ndowt hathitshisski ncausi
nghi s
mel anintobaski nit.Thismani sbeauti
full
y
handsome.
"
CanItakey
ourordernow?"
,thewai
tr
essasks
l
ooki
ngatBheki
khayawit
hlust.
Ilookatherassheli
cksherli
psandbit
esherl
ower
l
ip.Suchdisr
espect
?Bhekikhayal
ooksupfr
om hi
s
menuandl ooksatme.
"
Babe.Hav
eyoudeci
ded?
",heaskst
aki
ngmyhand
i
nhis.
"Ri
ceandchi
ckencurr
ywithachakal
akasal
ad.
Lemonwater
."
,Isayhandi
nghermymenu.
Shet
akesi
troughl
yandBhekikhay
anot
icest
hat
.Hi
s
j
awti
cksandsizedherupanddown.
"
Youhaveaproblem youwannair
onoutwit
hmy
wi
fe?
",heasksbalanci
nghi
schinonhi
sfist
s.
"
Nosi
r.
",
shesay
sthr
owi
ngmeal
ook.
She'
sreal
l
ypi
ssi
ngmeof
fcauseIwantt
ocr
ynow.
"Vaya.Cal
lanot
herwai
terf
orus.
",hesay
s
dismissi
ngher.
"Wai
t.No.You'
llat
tendtousaslongaswe'l
lbeher
e.
Babyorder
."
,Isaylooki
ngatBheki
khaya.
Helooksatmeskept
ical
bef
orenoddi
ngand
or
deri
ng.
"
I'
m sor
ryaboutt
hat
."
,heapol
ogi
sesaf
tershel
eft
.
"
Forwhat
?Bei
nghot?She'
sjustbi
tt
ercausey
ou'
re
wi
thme."
,Iwi
nkathi
m.
Hesmi
l
eski
ssi
ngmyhand.
"
Ilov
eyou.
",hewhi
sper
s.
Ilookinhiseyesandthestarsar
esti
llpr
esent.Ti
ll
thisdayIsti
ll
don'tunder
standwhatcausesthat.
Ev
enGoogledoesn'
thelp.Thel
oveinhi
seyesmade
meemoti
onal.Il
ovethewayhelooksatme.
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
",Isaywi
pingat
ear
.
Hechuckl
esashewipesmyeyes.I
'
llbl
amet
haton
t
hebaby.Idon'
tcr
ythi
smuch.

THANDO
Iam looki ngf ormyr i
ngingphoneandIcan' tfindit
.I
fi
nallyfindi tunderthesof aandthescreenis
cracked.Howdi ditgethere?Iunlockitanditstil
l
functionswel l
.Ihavemi ssedcal
lsfrom my
brothers,Uny eziandDad.Ihav ebeenint hestudy.I
callDadf irstandheanswer swhenI '
m abouttodr op.
"
HeyNana.
..St
opi
tNandi
!"
,hesay
slaughi
ng.
Seemsasi
fI'
m di
stur
bingsomet
hing.
"
I'
ll
cal
lyoul
aterDad.
",Isaysmi
l
ing.
"
Oka-hahahaNandi
!OkayNana.
",hesay
sdr
oppi
ng.
Heseemshappyandthat
sal
lIcoul
dev
eraskf
or.I
smi
leandcal
lKhul
ekani
.
"
Ntwanay
ami
!"
,hescr
eamscausi
ngmet
owi
nce.
"
Ntwana.Yougood?
",Iasksmi
l
ing.
"
Alwaysandyou?I
'v
ebeencall
ingandy
ourphone
r
ingsunanswer
ed.
",
Khul
ekani
"Sor
ry.I
'
v ebeenbusy.I
'vebeencontact
ingsome
bestpsychologi
stsacr
osstheworldtoworkatmy
hospi
tal
.",Isi
tdown.
"
Howi
sthatgoi
ng?
"
"Okay.AfewhaverespondedandI'
m wai
tingon
other
sandaf t
ert
hatI'
lll
etDadinandhecansign
thefi
nalpaper
workforthemachiner
yneeded.
"
"
I'
m pr
oudofy
ou.
",hesay
spr
oudl
y.
Ismil
eathiswords.I
'
m proudofmysel
f.If
inal
l
y
foundsomethi
ngtonurt
ureandhel
pbuild.
"
Thanky
ou.
"
Wesayourgoodby esandIpromisetocomet oDads
dinnernextweek.Hisprobabl
ygoingtointr
oduce
hi
swoman.Ical ltheothersandtheyall
seenalri
ght
.
IpromiseUnyezitovisi
tsoonplusImissmy
nephews.Igetdressedandheadoutf orthemall
.I
havebeenbur iedi
nwor kthatmyhai rneeds
grooming.Idrinkmypi l
lsbef
or egett
ingoutoft he
car.WhenIopent hedoorIdontnot i
cethecar
dri
vinginhitt
ingit
smi rr
oroff.Iqui
cklyclosemy
doorandl ookatthecar.It
saBMW i 8redandbl ack
i
ncol or
.Igetoutassoonast hedrivergetsoff.He
l
ooksathi scarandhi sjawist i
cki
ng.Hislarge
fr
amet urnstowardsmeandt owersoverme.Il ook
upathim andswal lowmysal ivawhenInot i
cet hi
s
el
igibl
edar kbeauty.
"Uh.
..Uhm..
.I-
I.
..
",Icl
earmyt
hroataswor
dscan'
t
seem tofor
m.
"
Miss.Yourcari
snotpar
kedr
ight
.St
ayi
nbet
ween
t
heli
nes."
,hesayscal
mly.
Thel
ookonhi
sfacepr
oveshi
sfarf
rom cal
m.
"
I'
m sor
ry.Howmuchisthatgoi
ngt
ocost
?",
Iask
t
akingmychequebook.
"No.I
twon'
tcostmuch.Par
kyourcarri
ghtbefore
youdamagesomeoneelse'
scar
."
,hesayswalking
off
.
Il
ookathi
m ashewal
ksaway
.Hi
sinbl
ackj
eans
thatholdhi
sfirm buttandhisv erymuscularthi
ghs
downt ohisbracketedlegsandIl ikehi
scalves.Hi
s
physiqueseemsl i
kear egularvisi
toratt
hegy m ki
nd
ofguyorasoccerpl ay
ers.Iwalkinsidethemall
keepinganeyeonhi m.Hisbicepsf l
exi
ngasi t
seemsashet alksont hephonewi thsomeone.I
bumpi ntosomeone.
"
Sor
ry.
",Iapol
ogi
ze.
Il
ookupandIhavelosthi
minthecrowd.If
eel
kind
ofsadbutIbr
ushi
toffwalki
ngtowardst
hesal
on.

NDABENKHULU
Sanel
eandLangaar emaki
ngnoiseastheyt
alk
abouthouses.Theset
wogetal
onglikeahouseon
fi
re.
"Thi
sonei
sni
cebutIdon'
tl
iket
hear
chi
tect
."
,
Sanel
esay
s.
Ihavet
okeepr
emindi
ngmysel
fthatt
hesear
eki
ds.I
guesst
heydol
ear
nsomethi
ngonTV.
"
Iagr
eewi
thy
ou.I
fIwast
hebui
l
der
.I'
dusef
ir
st
br
ickonthi
shousetogowel
lwi
tht
hev
int
age
ar
chit
ect
.",
Langasays.
Il
aughandshakemyheadwal kingout
.Itwouldl
ook
betterwit
hgreasepaint
edbr ownwoodandgl ass
butitsnotmyconv er
sati
onandIt hi
nkthathouseis
buil
tjustfi
ne.Imissmyfiancée.Ifi
ndherinmy
studyonherlaptop.
"
Hey
.",
Igr
eetki
ssi
ngher
.
"
Hey
.",
shegr
eet
swi
pingt
hel
i
pgl
ossof
fmyl
i
ps.
Ipul
lachai
randsi
tnextt
oher
.
"Whatar
eyouwor
kingon?
",Iaskpeepi
ngather
scr
een.
"
Thedecorat
ions.Howaboutgol
dandwhi te?I
want
edblackbutit'
l
llookl
i
keafuner
al.
",shesays
l
ooki
ngatherscreen.
"Gol
dandwhi t
eisokay
.Areyoubaki
ngourweddi
ng
cake?"
,Iaskcl
osi
ngthelapt
op.
"Yeah.IknowwhatIwantplusi
t'
dbeawasteof
moneypay ingsomeoneel
setodoit
."
,herv
oiceev
er
sosmoot h.
"Youhav
ebeenwor r
iedaboutthebudget
.Wedont
haveabudgetNoxol
o.Andhireaweddingpl
anner
."
Ipi
ckherupandputheront
opoft
hedeskput
ti
ng
herl
apt
oponthechair
.
"
Khuzway
o."
Igeti
nbet weenherthi
ghsandrunmyhandson
them causi
ngmyT- shi
rtt
oinchup.
"
Mmmmh?
"
"Mom i
spay i
ngformydress.I
'm baki
ngthecake.
Momshusbandi spayi
ngforthewedding.You'r
e
payi
ngforthesui
tsandwhateverelsewe'
llneed.I
canpayfortheweddi
ngplanner.
",shesaysgivi
ng
memor eaccesstoherneck.
Ist
opsucki
ngonherneckandl
ookather
.
"
What
?I'
m pay
ingf
ort
heweddi
ng.
",It
ell
her
.
"
Hejustwantst
ohel
pplusit
snotmuch.Justhal
fof
whatneedst
obepai
d."
,shetri
esr
easoni
ng.
"
No.
"
Ipr
esst
hebut
tonundermydeskandt
hedoorl
ocks.
Ipushev
ery
thi
ngdownof
fthet
abl
eandshegi
ggl
es.

UNYEZI
IpeepintoNkosinathisroom andhi splayi
ngFIFA.I
si
tnexttohim andhepausest hegameandhands
meaj oysti
ck.Wer estartthegame.Langal amiisat
Ndabenkhulushousev i
sit
ingSanele.Idon'tknow
muchbutal lIknowi sthatheishisf i
ancé'
sson.
Langawentt ocheckonhi sminesites.Nkosinathii
s
whippi
ngmyassont hisgame.Imanaget oscor e
onegoal andIsti
llcan'tsavemyselfcausehewon.
"
Mxm.
",Igi
vehi
m hi
sjoy
sti
ck.
Hechuckl
esandput
sthem down.
"
Hey
."
"
Heymom.
"
"
Arey
ouokay
?"
Hisl
ostsomewei
ghtandIknowi
tstheweed.I
knowaweedsmokerwhenIseeone.
"
I'
m okay
."
"
You'
rel
yi
ng.
",Isayl
ooki
ngathi
m.
Hesi
ghsandr
ubshi
sface.
"
Honest
ly.It
hinkNkany
ezi
iscr
ying.
"
"You'r
etr
yingt
ogetr
idofme.Yourbr
otheri
s
sleepi
ngandIhav
ehisbabymonit
or.
"
"
I'
m ser
iousl
yokay
.",
hel
i
esagai
n.
"
Whenar
eyougoi
ngt
ost
opsmoki
ngweed?
",Iask.
Hechokesonhissali
vawit
hhiseyesout.Irubhi
s
backandhandhimthebott
leofwateri
nf r
ontofhim.
Hedri
nksupandfinal
lycal
msdown.
"
Talk.You'
renotoldenought
onotgetandass
whooping.
",Isaycal
mly.
"
Uhmama.Ei
sh.
",hescr
atcheshi
shead.
"You'r
enotokay.Icanseethebagsundery oureyes.
You'real
way shi
gh.You'r
ealwaysatyourapartment
withthatpoorgi
rl
.Stopstri
ngingheral
ong.I'
ve
decidedtogetyouat her
apist
."
Hel
ooksatmel
i
keI
'
vel
ostmymi
nd.
"
I'
m notat
tendi
ngt
hat
.It
ssoccerseason.I
'
llbev
ery
busy
.",
het
ri
esdi
smi
ssi
ngme.
"Iwasn'taski
ng.Iknowy ouwon'
ttel
lmebutt al
ki
ng
toast r
angerwillhel
p.Ithel
pedme.Pleaset
hinkit
through.TheystartnextweekWednesdayaf
ter
school."
Hesi
ghsandr
ubshi
sface.
"
Thanky
oumom.
"
"
Iloveyoumf
anawami.Whateveri
tisIt
rusty
ou'
l
l
t
elluswheny
ou'
rer
eady.
",Iki
sshisfor
ehead.
"
Ilov
eyout
oomama.
",het
hrowshi
shandsar
ound
me.
Ihol
dhi
mi nmyarmsandIhearhi
m si
gh.Idont
knowwhatiti
sbuti
thast
obebig.Webreakofft
he
hug.
"
Hopey
ou'
l
lsi
ngf
ormesoon.
",Isaysmi
l
ing.
"
How-
?",
heseemsshocked.
"
Ihear
dyou.
",Isaycl
osi
ngt
hedoorbehi
ndme.
Ismileandwipethel
onetearthatmanagest
o
escape.Nkanyezi
scr
yri
pst hr
oughtheBabyMoni
tor
andIwal
ktowardshisroom.ItextLangathatImi
ss
hi
m.Ilovei
twhenImi sshim causewhenIseehim
i
tfeel
sli
keI'
mfall
inginlov
ewi thhi
m all
overagai
n.
50
TSHEGO
Iwakeupwi thKhul
ekani
sti
l
linsi
demeandhi serect
again.Myvaginai
sswoll
enfrom l
astnight.It
ry
taki
nghim outbuthehol
dsmei nplace.Iguesshis
awakenow.
"Tshego.
",hest
il
lhast
hatZul
uaccentwhenhe
pronouncesmyname.
"
Mmmh?
"
"
Tshego.
",hesay
smor
est
ernl
y.
Hi
seyesarest
il
lcl
osedandhiseyebr
owsare
f
urr
owedinanannoyedway.Guesshisst
il
lpi
ssedat
me.
"
Khul
ekani
."
"Ihopewhathappenedy esterdaywon'thappen
again.I
fyoueverrai
sey ourv oi
ceatmey ou'l
lspend
anent i
reweekunabl
et owal k.Youshoutedatmei n
frontofmyworkers.
",hi
sv oiceisl
owbutv er
y
i
nt i
midati
ng.
Hi
snotonet
ogetangr
yandIt
houghthewasgoi
ng
tosl
apmey ester
daywi t
hthewayhewassopi ssed.
Isawfil
esaboutmeandIwasangr yhewasdi ggi ng
i
ntomei nsteadofaskingme.Irespecthispriv
acy
andtheleasthecouldhav edonewasr espectmi ne.
Iwaswr ongforgoingathiminfrontofhisstaffat
theoff
icebutIwasj ustsoangry.
"
Yousl
appedmeTshegof
atso.
",hechuckl
esdar
kly
.
Ohtherewast hatt
oo.Imayhaveslappedhim and
cussedathim.Mostlyi
nTswanaandI '
m gladhe
couldn'
tunderst
andhalft
heshi
tIsaidcauseI'
dbe
deadr i
ghtnow.
"
I'
m sor
ry.Iwassoangr
-"
"SowasIwheny oucamelikethatatmyof f
ive?My
workpl
ace.ButdidIr
aisemyv oiceorslapyou?"
,he
cutsmeofftaki
nghim sel
foutandIwi nce.
"
Youdi
dn'
t.I
'
m sor
ry.
",Iapol
ogi
sesi
tt
ingup.
"Soam Ibuti
tsprot
ocoli
nourfami
l
ytolookint
o
someone'sbackgr
ound.
",hesay
swear
inghispant
s.
"
Coul
dn'
tyout
rustme?
",Iask.
"
IdobutDaddoesn'
t
.It
'swhati
tis.I
'
m sor
ryf
ort
hat
butIdontwantt
odi
sci
pli
ney
ouagai
n."
,hebut
tons
hi
sshirt
.
Isitther
ewatchinghim getdressed.Iguesshi
ssti
l
l
pissedcausehisnotevent aki
ngashowerbef or
e
goingbacktohisplace.
"
Ilov
eyou.
",heki
ssesmyf
orehead.
Hegoest othebat hroom andcomesbackl aterand
bidsgoodby e.IsighasIgetoutofbed.Theache
betweenmyl egscausi ngmet oli
mp.Her eall
ydida
numberonme.Hi sal waysbeengent l
ebuty ester
day
hewassor oughandsodeep.Hewentt hewhol e
nightti
llIcouldn'
tt akeitanymore.Icouldn'tfeelmy
l
egsf rom allt
heor gasmst hatIendedupcr yingwith
pleasure.Igetinsidetheshowerandl etthewat er
cascadedownmyachi ngbody .I'
m sl
eepingi ntoday.
I'
l
l askfornotesf r
om Mi r
anda.

UNYEZI
"Langa!
",Iscr
eam outi
npl
easur
eashest
rokes
deeper.
Idigmynai l
sintohi sshouldersashepenetratesme.
Ihavemyl egsar oundhim ashepi nsmeont he
showerwal l
.Hehi tsitsl
ightl
yfrom t
heleftandI
archmybackf eeli
nghischestonmyboobs.If eel
a
knotinmyabdomenandIcl enchmywal l
saround
hispenisandhegr oanswithhisheadonmy
shoulder.Webot hcum aswepantundert heshower
water.Irel
easemyl egsaroundhim andheki sses
myshoul der.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
",Isayt
raci
ngmynameonhi
schest
.
West
ayl
i
ket
hatf
orawhi
l
eembr
aci
ngeachot
her
.
"
Havey out
alkedt
oNkosi
nat
hi?
",heasksashe
washesmyback.
"Yes.Heagr
eedtot
her
apy
.",
Ismi
l
eki
ssi
ngt
hehand
onmyshoulder
.
"
Youshoul
dhav
eletmet
alkt
ohi
m."
"
No.Heneedssomepr
ofessi
onal
hel
p.He'
l
lbef
ine.
"
It
urnar
oundandhesmi
les.Themoonandocean.I
smil
etr
aci
ngmyeyesov
erhiseyebr
ows.Beaut
if
ul.
"LetmegobathNkanyezi
.Hi
sir
ri
tat
edt
oday
.",
Isay
getti
ngoutoft
heshower.
"
Thatonei
salway
sangr
y."
,hechuckl
esspanki
ng
mywetbut
t.
Ibl
owhi m aki
ssandl eavehimt oshower.Iam wet
fr
om Nkanyezisplashi
ngwat eraround.Hekeepson
cry
ingandbiti
ngmyf i
nger.LangawalksinwhenI
j
ustfi
nisheddressinghim up.
"
Hisst
il
lcr
ying?
",heaskst
aki
nghi
mfr
om me.
"Yeah.Hewon'
teat.Hespi
thi
sporr
idgeal
lov
erme.
",
IsayasIpoi
ntthestai
nsonmydress.
Hehumsandput sNkany
ezisf
ingeri
nsi
dehi
smout h
rubbi
nghisgumsandhestopscryi
ngandl
atches
ontoLangasfi
nger
.
"
Ah.Hi
steet
hing.
",Langasay
ssmi
l
ing.
"
Didn'
twebuysomet
hingf
ort
hat
?"
Henodsashesi tsdown.Istartl
ooki
ngthroughthe
boxesofNkanyezisst
uff.Foundthem.It
akeone
andri
nseitbef
orehandingittoLanga.Heputsitin
hi
smout hmakinggurgli
ngsounds.
"
He'
sgr
owi
ng.
",Ismi
l
ewi
tht
ear
sinmyey
es.
"
Babe.Don'
tcr
y."
,hesay
staki
ngmyhand.
Lami
wal
ksi
nal
lhappyasusual
.
"
Mommy
.Daddy
.Li
lbr
o."
,heget
ski
ssi
ngourcheeks.
"
Heysol
dier
."
,Igr
eet
.
Langahandshim Nkanyeziwhenhesit
sdownand
hel
pshim hol
dhim safel
y.Lamistar
tstal
ki
ngwi
th
Nkanyezi
andNkany ezii
slaughi
ng.
"
Morni
ng.Mom.Hav
eyouseenmyt
ie?
",
Nkosi
nat
hi
wal
ksi
n.
"
Oh.It
hinkIfol
dedi
twi
thNkany
ezi
scl
othes.Check
t
hatdr
awer."
Hegoest
her
eaf
terki
ssi
nghi
sli
tt
lebr
other
scheeks.
"
Foundi
t.
",hesay
swal
ki
ngout
.
"
Okaymybaby
."
IstandupandLangat akesNkafrom Lami.Weal
l
headt otheki
tchen.Idishoutf
oreveryoneandwai
t
forthem togo.Iheaddownt othegym aft
er
changing.
AMANDA
Iarr
iveatschoolbefor
eNkosi nathi.Istil
lcan't
bel
ievewhathet oldme.Hecr iedforhour saf t
er
tel
l
ingmeev eryt
hing.I
'venev erseenhi m sobr oken.
Iwonderhowhewasabl et okeept hisasecr etfor
solong.Ihel
dhim ashebr okedowni nmyar ms.I
seehim getoutofhisri
deandwal kingt owardsme.
Weshar eahugandIhandhi m af atcake.Hisfr i
ends
cal
lhimf oramor ni
ngjointbuthedecl ines.
"Whyareyoul
ookingatmeli
ket
hat
?",
heasks
swal
lowingaf
terchewi
ng.
"
Younev
ert
urndownaj
oint
."
,Isay
.
Wewal
kinsi
det
heschool
.
"Ther
apyhasbeengood.Inst
eadofsmoki
ngDr
SambosuggestedIi
nvestall
thatt
imei
nsoccer
."
,he
says.
Ismileathi
m andheput shisar
m ov
erme.Hi
s
neverbeenthi
s'af
fect
ionate'
.
"
Goodcausey
ouwer
elosi
ngt
hatsi
xpack.
",Isay
l
aughi
ng.
"
Thi
ssi
xpackai
n'
tgoi
ngnowher
e."
,hechuckl
es.
Hedropsmeof
fatmyclassandki
ssesmyf
orehead
bef
orewal
ki
ngoffwi
thhi
sonebracket
.
"
Disabl
edhot
ness.
",Isayl
aughi
ng.
Heturnsar
oundandgivesmet
hemi
ddl
efi
ngerand
Ismil
egett
ingi
ntocl
ass.

THANDO
Iam sotir
edandt heseheelsarekil
li
ngme.Iwasup
al
lnightpreparingf ort
hatmeetingandwhenIfound
outi
twast heguyIbumpedhi swindowafewweeks
backIalmostf ainted.Helookedsohotinasuit.As
soonasIent ermyof fi
ceItakeoffmyshoes.Isigh
asIthrowmy selfonmyof fi
cecouch.Myoffi
ce.
Thatsoundssogood.
"
Myv
eryownof
fi
ce.
",Isaysi
ghi
ngwhi
l
esmi
l
ing.
"Bestbel
i
evei
tyour
s.Cut
etoes.
",
avoi
cedi
stur
bsmy
peace.
Isi
tupstrai
ghtandI'm metwi
thdarkeyes.Mr
But
helezi
.HisthatguyIbumpedhiscarthatwasso
hot
.Hei
sdonati
ngmill
ionsint
omyhospi t
alandI
al
mostf
aint
ed.Dadcheckedhim andhi
sclean.
"
Thanky
ou.
",It
rysoundi
ngokay
.
IcrossmylegsashisCol
ognef i
ll
smyof f
ice.He
takesaseatnextt
omeandcl earshist
hroat.I
clenchmythi
ghsinhopesfortheit
chinbetweenmy
thighst
ogoaway .
"
You'
reacl
umsyl
adyMsKhuzway
o."
,hel
ooki
ngme
i
ntheey
es.
Icl
earmyt
hroatandcl
enchmyt
highst
ight
er.
"Ihav
et oagree.Sor
ryabouty
ourcaragai
n."
,Isay
embarrassed.
Hechucklesrev
eal
ingext
rateethandIsucki
na
br
eath.Ihaveaweaknessforpeopl
ewithext
rat
eet
h.
"
It
sokayMsKhuzway
o."
,hesmi
l
es.
"
JustThandol
wet
hu.
"
"
Thandol
wet
hu.Beaut
if
ulname.Cal
lmeOzo.
"
"
Ozo?
"
"
Mymom i
sNi
ger
ian.Shenamedmet
hat
.Sbusi
so
i
smyf
ir
stnamet
hou.
"
"
Ili
keOzobet
ter
."
,Isaysmi
l
ing.
"
Cany
ousaymynameagai
n."
"
Ozo?
",Iasksmi
l
ing.
"
Per
fect
.Thando.Youst
il
loweme.
"
"
Oh?
"
"Yes.Howaboutgoingoutt
odi
nnerwit
hme?Ijust
mov edhere.YoucanshowmearoundDur
ban.
",he
sayssmili
ng.
Am Ibeingtemptedhere?HowdoIhavedinnerwith
thi
s'Al
phaMal e'
who'sv oi
ceal
onemakesmef eel
l
ikestr
ippi
ngandl ayBarrf
orhi
m.ManI'm sodir
ty.I
shakemyhead.
"
No?
",heasks.
"No.No.Imeany
es.
..YesI
'
dgot
odi
nnerwi
thy
ou.
",
Isaysmili
ng.
"
Wel
lIwasn'
taski
ng.
",hesay
sst
andi
ngup.
Hethr
owsmeasmilebef
oresayi
nghi
sgoodbye.As
soonashi
soutt
hedoorI
'
m onthephonewi
th
Uny
ezi
.At
extdi
stur
bsme.
"
Tomorrownight
.8pm.I
'
llf
etchy
ou.NB:
Iwon'
tneed
y
ouraddress.
"
Ir
eaditandlaugh.Icoulddri
vetoyourplaceaswell
asIhaveyouraddresstoo.Ifor
getaboutthatgol
d
di
ggingj
erkforafewmi nutes.
51
UNYEZI
Itakeaseatwi thNkany ezi inmyar msandgi vehim
hispacifi
er.Thandost retchesherhandsandIgi ve
himt oher.We' r
ehav i
ngameetupwi t
ht heot her
girl
s.Wemeteachot heratt hedinnerandev en
thoughwet houghtwe' dseeSeni orKhuzway osnew
girl
,wewer ev erydisappoi ntedwhenhecameal one.
Hesai dhej ustwant edt omeett henewaddi t
ionsto
thefami l
yandsai dweshoul dnotwor ryabouthi s
business.Thel ady'
sar ev erybeautifulandt hey'
re
verykindexceptf orthet i
cki ngti
mebomb,
KuhlekonkewhoIl aterl ear nedi
spr egnant .Shewi l
l
alsobev erypissedt hatwe' remeet i
ngwi thouther
butitsforagoodpur pose.
"
Readyt
oleav
e?"
,Noxol
oasks.
She'sav eryelegantwomanwhocar ri
esherselfwith
confident.Shehasar est
ingbitchfaceandy oucan
tel
lshedoesn' ttakenonsense,wellIdoubtanyofus
do.Weal lst
andupandt akeourbags.Wepayt he
bil
landl eaveforthemall.We'r
eplanningasurpr i
se
babyshowerf orKuhle.Noxolohadhi r
edoneofthe
mostr ecommendedEv entPlannersandIwas
surpr
isedi t
'sSam Swanepoel .Youcouldn'
thave
guessedbet ter.Theonewhosl eptwit
hmyhusband.
Ihaven'ttol
dt hem thatIknowher, j
ustmeand
Thandoknowandi tsshallremainli
kethat
.Weenter
hershopandshehasst uf
flayedoutforus.
"Ladi
es.Ni
cef
ory
out
owor
kwi
thme.
",shesay
s
smili
ng.
Shest ar
tsgivi
ngushandshakesandwhenshe
reachesmesher et
ali
ates.It
akeherhandsqueezing
i
tinthepr ocessandshewi nces.Thandoj
ustwalks
pastherandst rai
ghtt
ot hetabl
eignori
ngher
gesture.
"Uh..
.Ergm.Ichoseoutsomeneutralcol
ourssi
nce
y'
alldon'tknowthegender
."
,shesaysgiv
ingusher
practi
sedsmi l
e.
West i
llhav
eaf ewmonthsti
llwefinal
l
ysurpri
seher
we'dprobablyknowbythent hegenderbutIkeep
quiet
.Thisbetterbequi
ck.Ihavesomepaper sto
submit.
LANGALAKHE
Myguy supdat
emeofmywi fe'
slocationasal ways
butIchokeonmydr inkwhenIseeshe' satSam's
Shop.Whatisshedoi ngther
e?Iknowmywi feandI
hopeshedoesn'tdoany t
hingstupid.At extf
rom her
popsupwi t
hapi ct
ureofhersmi l
ing.
"
I'
m wi
thy
ourgi
rl
fr
iend.Il
ookpr
ett
ydon'
tI?
"
Myey esareasbigassaucer sri
ghtnow.Ihopeshe
won'tbeangryatmeall ov
eragain.Amemor yofme
i
nhospi t
alcomest omindandsweatbuilduponmy
for
ehead.It
slikeIcanfeelt
hatpainagai
n.Itakemy
keysandleavethemine.I'
llhav
et opost
ponethis
meeting.
"
MrKhuzway
o!"
,myPAr
unsaf
terme.
"
YesSandi
l
e."
"
Sir
.Themeet
ing?
",heasksconf
used.
"Post
ponei
t.Apol
ogi
seonmybehal
f.Somet
hing
cameup."
Henodsandgoesbacki
ntot
heboar
droom.Ineed
toapol
ogizet
omywi feagain.Ineedtogetr
idof
Sam.Shecan'tbeaconstantremindert
omywi f
e
abouthowIbetray
edher.

KUHLEKONKE
Wehadjustcomeoutofthedoct
orsconsul
tat
ion
r
oom andhislooki
ngatt
hescansmil
ing.
"Ngizobay
itai
ma.Sof edengizobanengcosi.
"(
I'
m
goingtobeaf athersoli
keI'
m goingt
ohav ea
kid.
),
hesaysgr i
nningl
iketheidi
otheis.
Igeti
ntothecarandt
akeoutmybr
a.Hel
ooksat
meconfused.
"
Ennou?
"(andnow?
),Bheki
"
It
shur
ti
ngmyboobs.
",Isayr
ubbi
ngt
hem.
"
Wantmet
omassaget
hem?
",heasksseduct
ivel
y.
"
They
'r
esensi
ti
vel
atel
y.
"
"
Ireadt
hat
snor
mal
."
,Bheki
khay
a.
Hi
sbeenreadingalotofPregnancyMagazi
nesand
i
tsbeenhel
pful.Hi
sverysupporti
ve.I
'
minmyf i
rst
t
ri
mestersoI'
m notshowingthatmuchbuty
oucan
t
ell
thatsomethi
ngisgrowinginme.
"
Cany
oupassbySt
eer
s?"
"
Why
?",
heasksbr
owsf
urr
owed.
"
I'
m cr
avi
ngsomej
uicyst
eak.
"
"
No.Ndabenkhul
ucookedenoughheal
thyf
oodf
or
y
ou.It
hinkther
e'sst
eakt
oo."
,Bheki
.
Ilookathi m andhej ustcarri
esondr i
ving.Hehad
hisbr othercookf oodf orme.Ver yhealt
hyf ood.No
oil.Nospi ces.Most lyboil
ed.Ican'tcookf ormysel
f
any mor e.Heannoy smesomet i
mes.Whenhe
l
eav esI'
m orderingthatsteak.Amandai salsounder
strictorderstonotcookany' DANGEROUS
UNHEALTHY' f
ood.I '
m pregnantnotstrickenby
somedi sease.If eell
ikestrangl
inghimr ightnow.
Hisphoner ingsandi tsourkidshear t
beatandhi m
recitingapoem.I tsalsoannoy i
ngme.
"
Answery
ourphoneBheki
khay
a.I
tsi
rr
it
ati
ng.
"
"I
Phoneyabakant
ile?
"(Who'
sphonei
sthi
s?)
,he
asksl
ett
ingi
tri
ng.
Itakei
tandhel ooksatmeandIopenmywindow
throwi
ngitout.Helooksatmewif
eeyedandback
buthecan'tst
opt hecarsi
ncewe'
reont
hehighway
.
"Kuhlekonkeudakiwe?Uyahlany
awena.Orudakwe
yinganeleeseswini?
"(Ar
ey oudrunk?You'
recr
azy
.
You'redrunkenbythispr
egnancy.)
Ij
ustl
ookoutthewindowangr
yandsad.Ihat e
bei
ngpregnant
.Thi
sisnotwhatIwanted.Idon'
t
wantki
ds.Idon'
tev
enhavecontrol
overmy
emoti
ons.
"Ukhal
elani
?Ha.
amahnKuhlezi
shani
?"(
Whyar
eyou
cryi
ng?NomanKuhlewhat
'swrong?)
Ii
gnorehi
m andl
ookatpassi
ngcar
s.Ij
ustf
eel
so
sad.Hesi
ghsandleav
esmealone.

THANDO
IhandNkany ezi
toLangawhojustpoppedup
uninv
ited.Hewasstandi
ngnexttohiswifewit
hhis
handinher sdur
ingt
hewholethi
ng.Hekeptwi pi
ng
sweatof fhi
sfor
ehead.Hi
spoorgir
lf
riendcoul
dn't
evenlookatus.Uny ezi didntev engivetwoshi tsbut
shelookedl i
kesheenj oy edhav ingthesetwounder
herpressuresqui r
m.Weal lsayourgoodby esandI
dri
vet omyhouse.Iam t iredandagl assofwinewi l
l
do.Itakeabat hwhi lesi ppingwi ne.Ineedtogeta
petjusttoeaset hequi et nessint hi
shouse.Itgets
l
onelyatt i
mesbutI '
mt heonl yonewi t
houtalifei
n
myf ami l
y.Myjobi smyhusbandandi tsoundssad
buthey .Igetoutoft hebat handj ustputonat owel
onmynakedbody .Thei ntercom goesof f.I
'm not
expectinganyone.
"
Thandol
wet
huKhuzway
oResi
dence.
"
"
Thando.
"
Thatv oi
ce.It
sOzo.Ilookatthescreenandi ndeed
i
t'
shi m.Howt hefuckdoesheknowwher eIl i
ve.I
sendmybr ot
hersacode.Ilethi
mi nandIhearhi s
cardrivei
n.I'
m notevendressed.Irunupstair
sand
pullonasomeshor t
sandspor t
sbra.Icheckmy sel
f
i
nt hemi r
roronelastti
me.HeknocksandIopent he
door.Heleansont hedoorandsmi l
es.
"
Hey
."
Thisdudeshoul
dstopsmil
i
ng.Idon'
ttr
ustmy sel
fto
contr
olmyselfl
onger
.Hehandsmeabr acel
etwit
h
redbeads.
"
Uhm.
..Thanky
ou.
",Ismi
l
eawkwar
dly
.
"
Ididn'
tknowwhatt
obuyyousinceyoudi
tchedme
l
astti
me.ItsaNi
ger
ianbr
acel
et.
",
hesayshelpi
ngme
wearit
.
I
'v
eseenitonthoseNigeri
anmov
iesUny
eziwatches
wornbyact
ors.I
tblendedwel
lwi
thmydarkski
n.
"
It
sbeaut
if
ul.Ohsor
rycomei
n."
Ishif
tandgivehim spacetocomein.AnSUVdri
ves
i
nasI '
m abouttoclosethedoor
.Sbhamugetsoff
withotherguy
sandwal kinsi
de.
"
Handsupndoda.
",Sbhamucommands.
Ozolooksatmeandl
i
ftshi
shandsup.Theysear
ch
hi
m andtheywal
kout
.Sbhamuwalkstowar
dsme.
"We'
llbeoutsi
de.Scr
eam i
fyouneed
anyt
hing.
",
Sbhamu
Hethr
owsonemor elookatOzoandwal
ksout
.I
cl
osethedoorandr
ubmyar msawkwardl
y.
"
Tightsecur
it
y."
,Ozobr
eakst
hesi
l
ence.
"
Yeah.Howdi
dyouknowwher
eIl
i
ved?
"
"
Itol
dyoubefor
ethatIknowwher
eyoust
aybef
ore
y
oucancel
ledourdat
e."
Hesi
tsdownandt
akesof
fhi
sbl
azer
.
"
Oht
hat
..
.Jui
ce?Wat
er?Any
thi
ng?
"
"
Not
hanky
ou.Pl
easel
endmeanear
."
Isi
topposi
tehi
m.
"
Ihaveaniecei
nNigeri
a.Shehasschi
zophr
eni
aand
i
sstr
uggl
ingwit
hit
.",Ozo
"
Yeah?
"
"Ihopeshecanhav
eacomf
ort
abl
est
ayaty
our
asylum.
"
"Shesur
ewill
.Youdoknowyoucansignherup
onli
neri
ght
?Ihaveafeel
ingy
oudidn'
tcomeheref
or
that
."
Heinchescl
oserandlooksmeintheey e.Hehasthe
mostbeauti
ful
eyes.TheyweredarkbrownwhenI
f
ir
stmethim butnowunderthesunli
ghtemitt
ing
thr
oughtheglassesthey
'r
ehazelbr
ownwi
thal
i
ght
unnot
iceabl
ebluearoundhisi
ri
s.
"Ican'
tst
opt hi
nki
ngaboutyou.Yourclumsyself.
Yourbeauti
fuldi
mplesandhumbl epersonal
i
ty.Your
awkwardnessandsoftbuthoarsevoice.Mostofall
yourthi
ghs.
"
Helooksatmyt
highsandIcl
earmythroatasIf
eel
adampnessdownther
e.Icl
enchthem andhe
smil
es.
"Il
i
ket
heef
fectIhav
eony ou.Trustmeyouhav
ethe
sameonmebutI'
m bet
terathidi
ngit.
"
Hei sspeakingreallyslowl yandhiscol ogneisallI
cansmel l.Manly.Hisaur ai ssodomi nant.Ifeell
i
ke
getti
ngonmykneeswi thmypal msonmyt hi
ghs
andsubmi tt
ohim.If eel hisbreathenextt omyear
andmybr eathehitches.Hei snowl eaningoverme
withhishandont hearmr estscapturi
ngmei n.He
bit
est enderl
yonmyearl obeandIbi temyl i
p.
"
Ozo.
..Wecan'
t.
..
",
Ibr
eat
heout
.
"
Tel
lmet
ost
op.
"
"
Ozo.
..Thi
sisnot
-mmmh.
"
Heli
ft
smeandl
iesmeonthecouch.Heget
sin
bet
weenmyl
egsandl
ooksatme.
"
Thando.
"
"
Mmmh?
"
"
Tel
lmet
ost
op.
"
Iopenmymout handcl osei tagain.DoIwanthi mt o
stop?Nobutt heli
tt
lev oi
ceatt hebackofmyhead
i
ssay i
ngt hi
siswrong.Ihar dlyknowt hi
sguyand-I
am sur pri
sedbythef eelofhi slipsonmi ne.Ihav e
ki
ssedaf ewguy sbutIcan' tbetonmyki ssingskill
s.
Ifoll
owhi sl
eadandhi sli
psar esosof tandt enderI
can'thelppulli
nghislowerl i
pbet weenmyt eethand
hegr oans.Guesshel i
kedthat .Hishelpsmeoutof
myspor tbraandheki ssesmyboobs.Myhearr at
e
quickensasoneofhi shandssneaki nsidemyshor ts.
Her ubsmycl i
twhil
esucki ngonmyni ppl espay i
ng
attenti
ont oeachareola.Hei nser tsonef ingerinmy
holeandIsqui rm uncomf ortably.Het ri
esi nserti
ng
anotheroneandIf l
inch.Hest opsandt akesouthi s
handi nsidemyshor ts.
"
Openy
ourey
esThando.
",hecommands.
Iopent
hem slowl
yandheget
sof
fme.Hesi
tsnext
tomeandIsitnextt
ohi
m.
"
Arey
ouav
irgi
n?"
,hef
inal
l
yasksaf
teral
ongsi
l
ence.
Mybr ainstar
tswor ki
ngagainandIment al
ly
facepalm myselfuponreal
i
singthatIwasgoi ngto
givemyi nnocencetoacompl et
estranger.
Somet hingIhadkeptformydestined.Myconsci ous
screams' t
hev er
ysameonewhodoesn' twanty ou?'
andIlookdown.
"
Yes.
",Icr
oakout
.
Wekeepquietagai
nandher
unshi
shandov
erhi
s
bal
dhead.
"I
'
m sor
ryoftaki
ngadv
ant
ageofy
oul
i
ket
hat
."
,he
apol
ogi
ses.
Hestandsupandwear
shi
sbl
azer
.Il
ookathi
str
unk
andIgulp.
"
I'
ll
begoi
ng.I
'
llcheckony
oul
ater
."
Hekissesmyt empl
eandwal
ksout
.Whatj
ust
happened?Iguessmebei
ngavi
rgi
ncameasatur
n
off
.ImeanI '
ml ike22andIkeptmy sel
fforsomeone
whot hi
nksI '
m ahoodr at
.I'
m suchaclown.IwishI
cantellmybr other saboutthi
sbuttheywill
goafter
Ozoandi nterrogat ehi
m.Ihadt obegthem tol
etgo
ofthatgolddiggi ngbastard.Ical
lUnyezi
.She'
d
knowwhatt odoi nthi
ssituat
ion.

TSHEGOFATSO
"
Thatwasawkwar
d."
,Isayget
ti
ngi
ntot
hecarwi
th
Noxl
o.
Shenodsandst ar
ttheengine.Ihaveneverbeenin
suchatenseawkwar dposit
ion.Theauraduringthat
wholemeeti
ngwast enseassoonasUny ezis
husbandwalkedinbutthatisnoneofmybusi ness.
"
Ist
il
lcan'
tbel
i
evey
ou'
redat
ingKhul
ekani
."
,Noxol
o
"
Iknow.I
tjustfeltwei
rdthatwe'
redat
ingf
ri
ends.
Hi
saniceguy .
",Ismil
e.
"Ar
gh.Whocar
es?I
'
m happyt
oseey
ouhappy
.
You'
regl
owi
ng.
"
"
Hemakesmesohappy
.Heunder
standsmyl
ove
forsnakesandwewentt oseehi sformerpy t
honpet.
Thathadtobet hemostspecialthingthatever
happenedtome.I twassobeaut i
ful.Hedoesn'tt
ell
met ogoondiets,hejustdoesn'
tmi ndmychubby
self
.Ihaveneverfel
tsoconfidentinaf or
ever.
"
Noxol
olooksatmebef
oreconcent
rat
ingont
her
oad
gr
inni
ng.
"I
'
venev
erseenthi
ssideofyou.You'
renott
hatshy
gl
oomygir
lanymore.
",Noxol
o.
Ibl
ushandshel
aughsatme.
"
Yourengagementr
ingi
sbeaut
if
ul.
"
Shelooksati
tassheparksnexttoKuhl
esyar
d.
Thereist
hisgl
inti
nhereyes.Shesmil
esandshakes
herhead.
"
Youl
ovedon'
tyou?
",Iaskl
ooki
ngather
.
"MorethanIt
houghtIwoul
d.Hi
sjust.
..Idon'
tknow.
HetreatsmesogoodTshegothati
tfeelsweir
d
sometimesandtoogoodtobetr
uecauseI '
m not
usedtothi
s."
,shesayssmi
li
ngli
ghtl
y.
"
Enj
oyi
tbabes.Don'
tov
ert
hinkany
thi
ng.
"
Wegetoutoft hecarandasweappr oacht hehouse
wehearshouting.Wewal kinandBheki khayais
sit
ti
ngont hecouchl ooki
ngatashout i
ngandcr yi
ng
messKuhlekonkewi thfurr
owedey ebrowsandone
rai
sedeyebrow.Byt hewayhekeepscl enchi
nghis
j
awhei sverypissed.Wel ookatKuhlekonkeand
sheiscr
ying.
"Idon'twantt
hisbabyBhekikhay
a!I'
m notr
eady.I
can'tbeamot hernow!
",she'
scryi
nghyster
ical
l
y.
"
Kuhl
est
opshout
ing.
",hesay
scal
mly
.
"
Ihat
eyou!
",sheshout
svei
nspoppi
ng.
Sheslamsherbedr
oom doorbehi
ndherandlet
'sout
aloudscr
eam.Bhekikhay
alooksatusandst
ands
up.
"
Tellherwe'
l
lseehert
omor
row.By
e."
,Isaypul
l
ing
Noxolo.
Shepul
l
sherar
m awayf
rom me.
"
Bheki
khay
a."
,shecal
l
shi
m.
Het
urnsbackwit
hthescar
iestexpr
essi
onandI
r
eal
l
ywanttorun.
"Don'
thi
ther
.Pl
ease.
",shebegswi
tht
ear
sinher
eyes.
SadnesspassesthroughBheki
khay
a'sey
esbef or
e
shaki
nghiseyes.IholdNoxol
oshandasitshakes.
"
Iwoul
dnev
er.
",heent
ers.
West andt her
eandIpullNoxolooutt hedoor.She'
s
shakingwhi l
ecryi
ngsil
entl
y.Iguesst heshouti
ng
boughtbackal lt
hememor ies.Ifeelt
earsfi
llmy
eyesasIr ememberhowshe' dt r
yhidingall
those
scarswit
hmanycl ot
hing.Henev erhi
therfacethou.
Idecidetodr i
veasshesitsinthebackseat.
"
Shoul
dIcal
lyourt
her
api
st?
"
"
No.Ndabenkhul
u."
,shesobs.
Isi
ghandsear chforhi
stensbutcan'
tfindthem.
Shereal
izesandtakesthephone.Shetalkstohi
m
andIli
stentotheradi
otoavoideavesdroppi
ng.

NKOSI
NATHI
"Ar
eyoureadyt
otel
lmewhathappenedt
hatni
ght
?",
Sandr
aasks.
Iam l
ayi
ngdownont hesofawit
hmyey esclosed.
Whenmom suggest edatherapi
stIexpectedanold
womanbutSandraisapet i
tewomanwi ththe
cur
vesandbooty.Isitupandlookatherasshe
scr
ibbl
esdownonhernot ebook.Herweav ecomes
downonherfaceandshef li
cksitoff
.
"
Howol
dar
eyou?
",Iask.
Sherai
sesherheadandlooksatme.Imai
ntai
nthe
eyecont
actti
l
lshesighs.
"
I'
m 26.
",shef
inal
l
yanswer
s.
"
Youl
ooky
oungert
hant
hat
.22est
imat
ed.
"
Shedoesreal
ly
.Shehasthemostt
enderey
esand
i
tshardnottol
ookatthem.
"
Okay.Nkosinathidoyoufeel
li
keweedmakesy
ou
f
orgett
hatincident?Theoneyouwon'
ttel
l
."
"
Atf
irstIsmokedi
tforthatr
easonandt
hanI
r
eal
i
sedt her
ewasmor etoweed."
Shewr
it
esdownandl
ooksatme.
"
Mor
e?Li
kewhat
?"
"Sexualst
amina.Appet
it
e.Itgavemethisnew
feel
ing.Li
keitrev
eal
edtherealme.Icanthi
nk
everyt
hingthr
oughwhenI'm hi
gh."
Shel
ooksatmeandnods.
"
Youseet
hosedar
kspot
siny
ourey
es?
"
Inod.
"They '
recausedbyweed.Yourey esloset hat
whitenessi nthem.Youmayeatal otbuty oulose
weight .I
tgivesthebrainsomuchhappi nessthatit
i
mbal ancesthehy pot
halamusandcancausebi pol
ar
i
nmostcases.Youcanl oseyourmindf rom
smoki ngweed.YourI Qdecreaseswitheachsmoke
yout ake.Evernot i
cedhowdr yyourskinis?That s
causedbyweed.Youbecomeachi mneyt hatyour
l
ungsar esoakedwi thsmoket hatt
heycan' tpump
enoughoxy genatedbloodaroundthebody .
"
Inodandl
etal
lthi
ssi
nki
n.
"
Whenwast
hel
astt
imey
ousmoked?
"
"
Aweekaf
terIst
art
edat
tendi
ngt
hefir
stsessi
on
wi
thy
oupl
usIsawhowitwashurt
ingmom. "
"
Soi
fI'
m cor
recti
tsbeencl
oset
oamont
h?"
Inodandshesmi
l
eswr
it
ingdown.
"
Howi
sthesl
eepi
ng?
"
"2hour
smaxandI
'
m upagai
n.I
tst
heseni
ght
mar
es.
They.
..
argh.
"
"
Theywhat
?"
"Theyhauntme.It
slikethatexactmomentpl ays
againandagain.I
t'
slikeI'
mt hereagainonthe
stai
rcaseseei
nghim stra-
",Istopabrupt
ly.
Ist
andupandt
akemyphone.
"
Nkosi
nat
hiwe'
renotdoney
et.
"
"
Wear
e."
Il
eav
eherof
fi
ceandgeti
nsi
det
heawai
ti
ngcar
.
"
Myapar
tmentSker
e."
Henodsanddr i
ves.ItextSamkebutendupdel
eti
ng
i
t.Ical
lAmandainstead.Onlyshecanhandl
emy
painandanger
.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
Ikeepqui
etf
orawhi
l
ejustbr
eat
hing.
"
Nkosi
nat
hii
sev
ery
thi
ngokay
?"
"
Ineedy
ou.Agai
n."
"
Ithoughty
ousai
dwe'
rebet
terof
fasf
ri
ends.
"
"
Ithoughtsot
oobut
..
.Amandapl
ease.
"
Asobescapesmyl
i
psandIwi
peal
onet
ear
.
"I
'm sorr
ybutIcan't.Iwi
llbethereasaf ri
endbutI '
m
notsleepingwithyou.Il
ovey ouandy ouknowt hat
butIcan'tkeepdoingthi
s.Ican'tsettl
eforlesst han
meresex.Ideser v
emor et hanthisandsodoy ou.
I'
m comingt houassoonasIf i
nishmyaf t
erschool
chores.I'
l
l hol
dyouandcr ywithy ou.That
sal l
Ihav e
tooffer.
"
"
Any
thi
ngasl
ongy
ou'
rewi
thme.
"
Weendt hecallandIsi
gh.Herwordsplayinmy
headtoo.I
'm st
arti
ngtogetaheadache.Isitback
onthecarseatandlookupwithmyey esclosed.
52
THANDO
AYEARLATER
IhavebeenignoringSbusisosincewhathappened
andhisnotbackingdown.Adel i
verymanj ust
droppedoffmyl unchfr
om him withanot ethat
reads"Iwoul
d'veboughtitmy sel
fbutI'm goingt
o
Nigeri
atoday.
"Idon'tknowwhyIf el
tatingeof
sadnessthatIbrushedoff.Unyeziwalksinlooki
ng
beauti
ful
.
"
Baby
!",
shescr
eamski
ssi
ngmycheek.
Shel
ayscontai
neront
het
abl
eandsi
tsi
nfr
ontof
mesmil
ing.
"
Whatdoy
ouwant
?",
Isayey
eingher
.
"Not
hing.Ij
ustboughtmychildr
en'
sauntsome
l
unchev enthoughitseemssomeonebeatmetoi
t.
",
shegrabsthetakeawayfrom me.
"Youly
ingbutt
hanksf
orl
unchev
ent
houghSbusi
so
alr
eadydid.
"
Shel
ooksatmeandsi
tsst
rai
ght
.
"
Okay
.What
'swrong?You'
recal
l
inghi
m Sbusi
soand
y
ourt
onei
saslowassomepeopl ewoul
dgo."
"
He'
sleav
ing!
",Isi
gh.
"
Leav
ing?Towher
e?Howl
ong?
"
"
Idon'
tknow.
",Ishr
ug.
Shet
akesmyphoneandhandsi
ttome.
"
Cal
lhi
m andask.
"
"
No.
"
"
Cal
lhi
m."
Il
ookatherandshenodsherhead.Ipresshi
s
cont
actandhesi
tat
epressi
ngthecallopti
on.
"
Doi
t.
",shesay
schewi
ng.
Ipr
esst
hecal
lopt
ionandi
tst
art
sri
ngi
ng.
"
You'
redonei
gnor
ingme?Af
teray
ear
?"
That'
swhathesay
sassoonasheanswer
shi
s
phone.
"
Hey
?"
Uny
ezi
facepal
msandshakesherhead.
"
Hey
.",
heanswer
schuckl
i
ng.
Icl
earmyt
hroat
.
"
Soy
ou'
rel
eav
ing?
"
Ihearasi
ghont
heot
herend.
"
Yeah.I
'
llbegoneforawhi
l
e.Ihav
esomebusi
ness
t
hatsi
deaswell.
"
"
Howl
ongi
sawhi
l
e?"
"
3to6mont
hs.
"
Icl
osemyey
esandUny
ezi
nudgesme.
"
Ohokay
."
Shefr
ail
sherhandsandtakesapaperwr
it
ingdown.
Sheshovest
hepaperinmyhand.
"
CanIseey
oubef
orey
oul
eav
e?"
,Ir
eadout
.
"Yes.I
'
llcookandwe'
l
leatdi
nneratmyhouse.
That'
sokay ?
"
InodandUny
ezi
pinchesme.
"
Ouch.
"
"
What
?"
"
Not
hing.Yeahdi
nneraty
ourhousei
sokay
."
"
Okay
.I'
l
lsendt
headdr
ess.
"
Ichuckl
ebutdon'
ttel
lhi
m nott
o.
"
Thanksf
orl
unch.
"
"
Pleasur
e."
"
Bye.
"
"
Bye.
"
Wedr
opandIsqueal
li
keal
ovest
ri
ckent
eenager
.
"
So?
"
"
You'
resonosy
."
"
Ihel
pedy
ou.You'
dbesul
ki
ngr
ightnow.
"
"
We'
rehav
ingdi
nnerathi
shouse.
"
"
Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
owear
?"
Ishr
ugandopent
het
akeawayandsheboughtst
eak.
"
SoIwant
edt
otal
ktoy
ouaboutsomet
hing.
"
"
Ha!Iknewi
t!
"
"
Shutup!
"
Shescramblesi
nherbagandtakesoutanenvel
ope.
Shehandsittomeandsit
sbackbiti
ngherli
p.Iopen
i
tanditsaCV.Thei
risacert
if
icat
eofgraduat
iontoo.
"Iwasstudy
ingonli
ne.Igotgraduatedayearago.It
wasonNkosi nat
his17thbi
rthdaysoIcouldn'
ttake
theshi
neandIendedupf orgetti
ng.Langadoesn't
knowtoo.Beingastayathomemom wasnev eron
mylist
."
Ismil
eandreadoverherCV.Seei
nganot
herwoman
chasi
ngherdreamsissoheart
warmi
ng.
"
Ican'
tbel
i
evey
oudi
dn'
ttel
lmeaboutanyoft
his.
"
Shesmi
l
esandshr
ugs.
"
I'
ll
hir
eyou.
"
Shel
aughsandt
akesmyhands.
"
Thanky
ou.
"
Shestar
tscr
yingandIst
andup.Ihugherasshe
cr
ies.
KUHLEKONKE
BhekikhayawalksinwithSinenhl
anhlaandhands
hertome.Itakehi mfrom him wipi
ngmybooband
i
nsertitinhi
smout h.Ilookathim andIhat
ehowhe
l
ooksl i
kehisfatherwit
hnosi gnofme.
"
Sthandwasam.
"
Il
ookupathim andhesmil
eskneel
i
ngi
nfr
ontof
mewhil
eholdi
ngSne'shands.
"I
tsbeenat oughyearforyou.Foral
lofus.I
'
m sorr
y
thatIthoughtyouwerejustacti
ngupandthatyou
hatedourson.Iknewnot hi
ngaboutpostpar
tum
depression.
"
Ilookdownandhewi pesmytear.Itakeoutmy
boobandl aySneonmyshoul derandr ubhisback.
Aftergivi
ngbir
thtoSneIhatedhim.Iloathedhim.
Uny ezi
wast heonewhonot i
cedsomet hingwas
wr ongwithmebyhowIdi dn'
twanthi mt ofeed.She
toldBhekikhay
aaboutPostpart
um depr essi
onand
signedmei natanasy l
um.Iwasalway sexhausted
andIhadl ostahugeamountofwei ght.Amandai n
herboardingschoolwit
hnoonet ohel pmeandt he
thoughtsthatifmymotherwasherei
twouldbe
bettermadet hingswor
se.Uny
ezihel
pedr
aisemy
chil
duntil
Iwasout .
"
Letmet
akehi
mtohi
scot
."
Ihandhim Sneandl eaves.Iwasabletodealwi
th
thedeat
hofmypar entsandIf i
nal
lycont
actedmy
fat
her'
sbrotherandIwenthome.Mychi l
dcanhave
someonefrom mysi de.Bhekikhay
acomesbackas
I'
m cl
eani
ngar oundt hebedroom.
"
Kuhl
e."
.
Ilookathi
m andhehandsmehishandi
nwhi
chI
take.Hehol
dsmeinhisarms.
"
Wil
lyoumar
ryme?
"
Imoveawayf
rom hi
m andhet
akesoutar
ingf
rom
hi
spocket
.
"
Getdownononekneehawu.
"
Hechuckl
esandget
sdown.Hesmi
l
esatme.
"
Wil
lyoumakemet
hehappi
estmanandmar
ryme?
"
Ismi
l
eandnodwi
tht
ear
sst
reami
ngdownmyf
ace.
"
Yes?
"
"
Yes!
"
Hesli
dest
heri
ngonmyfingerandstandsup.He
ki
ssesmeandwestayi
neachot her
sarms.
"Whatti
mearewef et
chi
ngAmanda?Shet
extedme
thatshei
sreadyf
orDecemberhol
i
dayswi
thher
nephew."
"
Let
'st
akeabat
h.We'
l
lfet
chheraf
terl
unch.
"

NKOSI
NATHI
Ithrowt heballatLangaandheki cksitatPlutowho
j
ustl ooksati t
.Hisgr owingoldandalway ssleeping.
We'llbesay inggoodby etohim nextweek.They 'l
l
i
njecthim andhe' lldiepeaceful
l
y.Mom doesn' twant
toletgoofhi m buthisoldandsick.Hehascancer
andhasl ostweight.West opplayi
ngandIsi tnextt o
Pluto.Him andUny eziarethebestthi
ngthatev er
happenedt ome.Langasi t
snexttomeandPl ut
o
l
ay shisheadonhi slap.
"
Got
akeof
fyouruni
for
m bef
oreMom comesback.
Youknowshe'
ssti
l
lwait
ingf
oronemor
emi
stake
andyourassi
swhi
pped.
"
"I
twasmylastdayofschool
todaysoIwon'
tneedi
t
anyt
imesoon.
"
"
Iwi
shIwasy
ou.Mat
ri
cul
antandal
lgr
ownup.
"
Ichuckl
eandbr
ushedhi
shai
rmaki
nghi
m gr
oanand
hitmyhand.
"
Growingupi
snotf
un.Iwi
shIwas5agai
n.Cl
uel
ess.
I
nnocent.
"
Hel
ooksatmeandsqui
ntshi
sey
es.
"
Whenwi
l
lyout
ell
mewhyy
ouqui
tther
apy
?"
"You'
rej
ustakidLanga.Ther
ear
esomet
hing'
s
bett
erunsai
d."
Henodsandt
akesoutwi
negumsf r
om hi
spocket
.
HehandsmesomeandIacceptt
hem.
"
Doy
oumi
ssher
?"
Il
ookathi
m confusedandhel
ooksatmeandbl
i
nks
annoy
ed.Ohher.
"
All
thet
ime.School
hasn'
tbeent
hesamewi
thout
her
.Ismel
lheri
nmyr oom somet
imes.Ihadt
ost
op
l
ist
eni
ngtoourvoi
cenotes.
"
Henodsandthr
owsawinegum i
ntheai
rand
cat
chesi
twit
hhismout
h.
"
Youl
oveherdon'
tyou?
"
Il
ookathi
m chuckl
i
ng.
"
Hai
boLanga.Howol
dar
eyouagai
n?"
Heshakeshi
sheadatme.
"
I'
mtur
ning11butjustcauseI
'
m achi
l
ddoesn'
t
meanI
'
m stupi
d."
Il
ookathi
m andnod.Hekeepssur
pri
singme.Pl
uto
st
andsupandrunsi
nthehouse.
"
Mom'
shome.
"
Irunupst
air
stomyr oom t
otakeoutmyunif
orm
befor
eshemur der
sme.Shewalksinwit
hNkanyezi
whoiseati
ngSimbas.Guessshefet
chedhi
mf r
om
AuntThandos.Auntsmai
dlooksaft
erhi
m when
Mom haserrands.
"
Heymom.
"
"
Heybaby
.How'
sther
apy
?"
Langasi
deey
esmeandIcl
earmyt
hroat
.
"
Hel
pful
."
Shetakesoffhersungl
assesandputt
hem ont
he
counterwi
thherhandbag.
"
Doy
ouknowhowmuchIpaypersessi
on?
"
Ishakemyheadandgr
abahandf
ulofNkany
ezi
'
s
chi
ps.
"
R2000perhour
.Imagi
nehowmuchIpayi
nay
ear
."
Inodandsheopensthedrawersi
ntheki
tchen.I
don'
tunder
standwheret
hisisgoi
ng.
"
ThemoneyIusef
oryourt
her
apyi
smyl
i
fesav
ings
money
.Idon'
twor
k."
Shestandnextt
othest
ovewi
thawoodenspooni
n
herhand.
"
ImetSandr
atoday
."
Sandrapr
omi
sednott
otel
lhert
hatIst
opped
coming.
"Shet
oldmeyoustoppedat
tendi
ngyoursessi
ons
andyouthr
eat
enedhernott
ot el
lme.
"
Igulpasshewal kstowardsme.Imov eback.
Sandr aisgoingt
opayforthis.Idi
dn'
tev
ent hr
eaten
her.Ijusttol
dhertonottel
lmom orpayherav isi
t.I
wasj ustjoki
ng.WhatcouldIdo?
"
Wozal
a."(
Comeher
e.)
She'
scrazy
.Imagi
neget
ti
nganasswhoopi
ngat18.
Si
kes!
"
Mama.
"
"
Nat
hi.
"
"
Eishol
edi
.I'
l
lgot
oherof
fi
cer
ightnow.
"
"
Ver
ywellt
hen.I
'
llcal
lherandask.I
fnotNkosi
nat
hi
y
ou'
llf
eel
li
keyourassisonfi
re.
"
Inodandshethrowst hespoonatmeandIduck
runni
ngoutthedoor.IshakemyheadwhenIget
outsi
de.Dad'
scardrivesi
nandhegetsoutasthe
dri
verparki
nfrontofme.
"
Uyaphi
?"(
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
)
"
Ther
apy
."
"
Shef
oundout
?"
Inodandhel
ooksbehi
ndhi
m bef
orel
eani
ngonhi
s
car.
"What'
swrongboy?Imaynott al
kaboutitbutIknow
andcanseesomet hi
ngiseati
ngyouup.Ithasbeen
fory
earsbutnowitsatit
speak.Isi
tyourmot her
's
deat
hcausey ouchangedaft
erherdeat
h? "
Icl
enchmyj
awandhands.
"
Iti
sisn'
ti
t?Lookson-
"
"
Youwon'
tgeti
tBaba.
"
Igeti
nthecarandthedr
iverdr
ivesof
faf
terIt
ell
him
wherewe'
reheadi
ng.

NOXOLO
Iwal
koutwi
thmymom oft
heBr
idal
Bout
ique.
"
Thosedr
esseswer
ebeaut
if
ulNoxol
o."
"
Iknowmom butIdon'
tl
iket
hem.
"
Sherol
lsherey esandwebot hgetint
oourcar sand
hootateachot heraswedriveoff
.Ipromised
Ndabenkhulutohav el
unchwi t
hhimtodaysoIdr i
ve
tohi
srestaurant.Iwal
ktohisoffi
ceandhehasa
i
ndoorpicni
cset upgoingon.Ismil
etakingoffmy
heel
sandput ti
ngmybagdown.
"
Khul
u."
,Igr
eet
.
Hesmil
esandcomest
owardsme.Hel
i
ftsmeup
andt
urnsar
oundwi
thus.
"
Howdi
dthedr
essf
it
ti
nggo?
"
"
Idon'
tl
iket
hosedr
esses.
"
"I
t'
sokay
.We'
l
lgetanot
herdesi
gner
.May
beRandy
even.
"
Ismil
eandki sshi
m.Hi ski
ssessti
l
lleav
eme
breat
hless.Wepulloutandsmil
e.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
Icl
osemyey
esandsi
gh.
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Hehol
dsmet
ight
erandIl
aymyheadonhi
schest
.
"
Thechefcookedy
ourf
avor
it
emeal
."
"
Hecookedy
ou?
"
Helaughsandwesi tdown.Sampandbeanswi
th
hotbeefcur
ry.Icl
apmyhandscausinghi
mt ol
augh.
"
Sanel
eispr
obabl
yhomebynow.
"
"Yeah.Ihadhi
sfooddr
oppedof
fatourhousef
or
him."
Inodsmi
l
ing.Hei
sal
lI'
vebeendr
eami
ngaboutand
more.

TSHEGO
Iam attheinter
netcafémaki ngphotocopi
es.Iam
si
gningupf orNSFASwi ththehopesofget t
ing
approved.I
fIdon'tfi
ndabur sarysoonIdon'tknow
howI '
ll
studynextyear.Iam runni
nglowoncash
andI'm st
ressedout.Iam scaredofaskingmy
grandmothertohelpsinceshe'salr
eadyhelpingwit
h
mygr oceri
es.Mylunchtimeisalmostov er
.Itake
everyt
hingandstuffthem inmybag.Ir untowork
andwhenIgett hereI'm heav
ingandwheezi ng.I
didn'tgetti
met oeatandI
'm hungrybutIgotto
grind.Ifoundthi
sjobasawai t
ressatsomeI ndi
an
restaurantandtheti
psarehandy.
"
Ineedy
ouont
abl
e5Mal
uda.
",Sandyor
der
s.
"
Okaywher
e'smyapr
onandheel
s?"
"
Behi
ndt
hecount
er.
"
Iwearmyheel sandapronandwal ktotable5.Iput
onmysmi l
eandtakedownt heiror
der.It
sav ery
highstandardr
estaur
antandwewearf ormal.Itpay
s
wellandI'
vebeensaving.Imightbeabletopayf or
thefi
rstsemester
.Idonthaveanyclassest odaysoI
tookaf ul
ldayi
n.

NKOSI
NATHI
Ient
erSandr
a'sof
fi
ceandsitdown.Shelooksup
fr
om hernot
ebookandsmil
es.Shestopssmili
ng
whensheseesthelookonmyface.
"
Arey
oucr
azy
?"
Shel
ooksatmebl
i
nki
ng.
"
Icoul
dn'
tkeepl
yi
ng.
"
"Iaskedi
fyouwer
ecr
azynoti
fyouwer
egoi
ngt
o
keeplyi
ng.
"
Shestandsupignori
ngmeandget
smyf
il
ewhi
chi
s
thi
nnerthatt
heothers.
"
Let
'sst
artwi
thoursessi
on.
"
Ichuckl
eandsi
tupst
rai
ght
.
"Youneedt
oletcer
tai
nthi
ngsbeSandr
a.WhatI
knowisasecr
etdeepert
hanPhor
aslyr
ics.
"
Shesi
tsdownandopensmyf
il
e.
"
Thelastti
meyouwalkedoutofher
eyounear
ly
t
alkedbutyouf
earsomethi
ng.Someone.
"
Shecrossesherlegsandherskirtgoesupreveali
ng
hercreamythigh.She'
sweari
ngabl ousetodaythat
rev
ealshercleavage.Herj
ugslookbeauti
fulshouldI
say.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
Il
ookatherandshel
ooksdownatherbook.
"
Yourmot
her
.Shedi
edwheny
ouwer
eyoung.Do
y
oumi
ssher
?"
"Somet i
mes.Shewasn'tt
hatmuchofamot her.The
onlyti
meImi ssheriswhenIseeaR100000wor t
h
LouiseVuit
tonbag.Shecaredmoreaboutherheels
mor ethanus.
"
Shenodswr
it
ingdown.Herwr
it
ingnot
esi
rr
it
ates
me.
"
Stopt
hat
."
"
What
?"
"St
optakingnot
es.I'
m notal
ect
urer
.Li
stenandask
quest
ions.Nonotes.
",Ior
der
.
"
It
samust
."
"
Stopi
tSandr
a."
Sheput
sitdownandl
eansback.
"
Doy
ouhat
eher
?Yourmot
her
?Bi
ologi
cal
."
"No.Yes.Idontknow.Ihat
ethatImi
ssher
sometimes.Shewasawhor e.Sl
eptwi
ththeGar
dner
mostlywhenDadwasn' tal
l
owed."
"
Thef
actt
hatsher
anawayl
eav
ingy
oubehi
nd.Does
i
tangery
ou?
"
"
No.
"
"
Doy
out
hinky
ou'
l
lev
erwantt
omeetheragai
n?"
Irubmyface.Howdowantt
omeetadeadper
son
Sandr
a?Igroan.
"
You'
reabeaut
if
ull
adySandr
a."
Shegul
psandsi
tspr
oper
ly.
"
Okay
.Backt
othe-
"
"
Shutup.
"
Shest
aresatmesur
pri
sed.
"Idon'twanttot
alkaboutmymot
her
.Itpi
ssesme
off.Let'
stal
kaboutyou.
"
"
That
sinappr
opr
iat
e."
"
Idon'
tcar
e.Ar
eyouseei
ngsomeone?
"
"
No.
"
Shestandsupandgoest ot
helitt
letableatt
he
cornerandpourswateri
naglass.Istandupand
standbehindher.I
'
mt al
l
ert
hanherev enifshe'
s
wear
ingheel
s.MsSamboi sav
eryshor
tindi
vi
dual.
Shet
urnsaroundandspi
l
lswat
eronmei nshock.
"
Sor
ry.
"
"
It
sokay
."
It
akeof fmyhoodi
eandI'mlef
ttopless.Ihavebeen
workingonmyphysiqueasasoccerplayer
.Ithas
i
mpr ovedImi
ghtsay.
"
Wecan.
..Uhm.
..Gobackt
oourseat
s."
Shesayswit
hherey
esal
lov
ert
hepl
ace.She'
snot
evenbr
eathi
ng.
"
Breat
heSandr
a."
Sheexhal
esandgulpsdownherwater
.Iputmy
handsoneit
hersi
deofthet
ablet
rappi
ngherin.
"
Whatar
e-"
Icutherof fbyki
ssingher.Shetastesli
ke
str
awberries.Sherespondsandmanherl i
ps.Sheis
agoodkisserI '
l
lgiveherthat.Shepull
soutjustasi
t
getsheated.
"
Wecant
.You'
reki
d."
"
I'
mlegal
."
"
You'
remypat
ient
."
"
Stopwi
tht
heexcuses.
"
Iki
ssheragainandsherepli
eswit
hjustasmuch
hunger.Ipi
ckherupandsheissurpr
ised.Il
ayher
onthecouchgetti
ngbetweenherl
egswhi le
unbutt
oninghershi
rt
.
"
Thedoor
."
Igetupandlocki tkickingoffmyshoes.Igeti n
betweenherlegsagai n.Ihelpheroutofherbr aand
Irubandpinchherni ppl eswhil
ekissingherneck.
7Shemoansbeaut if
ullyandIhar denfull
y.Ili
fther
skir
tupexposingr edl ace.Shelooksgoodi nred.
Herthi
ghsarebeaut iful andthi
ck.Isearchmy
pocketsandIfindacondom.Luck.It earitopenwith
mymout handi nertit.Shelooksdownatme.
"
Howol
dar
eyouagai
n?"
"
18.
"
Isl
i
deherpanti
estot
hesi
derev
eal
ingaBrazi
l
ian
Wax.She'
sal
readywet
.Ir
ubmysel
fonherbefor
e
i
nser
ti
ngmy
sel
fandherpussywal
l
sswal
l
owmei
n.
"
Fuck!You'
resowar
m andt
ight
."
She'
sti
ght
,war
m andsof
t.Idon'
tthi
nkI
'
llr
egr
et
att
endi
ngt
herapyt
oday.
It
hrustdeeperandshemoansbi
ti
ngherl
i
ps.
"
Mmmmh.
"
Ist
artmov
ingandl
ookdownbetweenusl
ooki
ngat
howsheswall
owsmydicki
nsi
deher.
"
Ah!Nkosi
nat
hi!Ah!Shi
t!
"
She'
smoaningl
oudlyandgrippi
ngmyarmsdigging
hernai
lsi
nmyskin.Thatsgoingtol
eav
eabruise.
They'
ll
heall
i
ketherest
.
"
Keepi
tdown.
"
Shebit
esherl
ipssubsi
dinghermoans.Imi
ghtst
art
att
endi
ngther
apyagaini
fI'
llgetsuch.

LANGALAKHE
Uny
ezi
ischecki
ngonPl
utowwi
thNkany
ezi
.Langa
i
svisit
ingSanelefortheweekend.Iopent hesafe
andtakeoutmygunl eavi
ngUny ezi
s.Iputitar
ound
mytracksuitwaist
bandandcov eritwit
hmyhooodi e.
Unyeziwalksinthebedroom andIclosdthesafe
andexitthecloset
.
"
Mawabongi
sacwal
aisganga.
"(I
'
m goi
ngout
.)
"
Oh.Iwant
edust
otal
k."
"I
'
llbebackbef
oredi
nner
.I'
m meet
ingwi
tht
he
guys.
"
Shenodsandki
ssesme.
"
Whatshoul
dIcool
?"
"
Yousai
dyouhadaheadacher
ight
?Or
der
."
"
Okay
.Il
ovey
ou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Ikissheronel
astt
imeandheadtomycar.Idr
ivet
o
Khulekani
shousei
nspeed.WhenIar
ri
veevery
oneis
there.
"
Icutmyl unchdat
eshor
tbecauseofy
ou.
",
Ndabenkhulu.
"
Zishubi
l
ebaf
o."(
It
sheat
ed.
)
"
Zishani
?"(
What
'swr
ong?
),Khul
ekani
.
"
RememberNkany
ambaZi
kode?
"
Al
ltheguy
sfacest
urnser
ious.
"
Whatdoeshewantnow?
"
"Langal
ami andNkosinat
hi.Hisdaughter
schildr
en.
I
fnothei shandingmet otheauthori
ti
esfor
Bongekasdeat h.Hehasrecordi
ngsofust el
l
inghim
wewi l
lgivehim hi
sdaughtersbodyofhedoesn't
tal
k.Healsowant sR1mill
ion.
"
Mydadst
andsupandf
ixeshi
ssui
t.
"
Ilef
tmywomanf
ort
his?Bheki
khay
a."
Baf
olooksatdad.
"
Kil
lhi
m."
Henodsst
andi
ngup.
"You.Getr
idoft
hatSwanepoel
gir
l.I
tsbeenayear.
Londonseemsli
keagoodplaceforhert
orel
ocate.
"
Hewal
ksoutmumbl
i
ngandcussi
ngus.
"It
oldyounottohaveaconsci
enceandy
ouwent
aheadandgaveZikodedaught
ers
corpse.
",
Bheki
khaya.
Hest
andsupcl
i
cki
nghi
stongue.
"
LeaveSwanepoeltome.Deal
wit
hwhat
everNat
hii
s
f
aci
ng."
,Ndabenkhulu.
Weal
lst
andup.
"
Getoutofmyhouse.Ihav
etopi
ckupmywoman
f
rom wor
k."
,Khul
ekani
.
Wegeti
ntoourcar
s.
"
RemindThandot
otakeherpi
l
ls.
"Khul
ekani
remi
nds
me.
Isendherat
extanddr
iveof
f.
53
UNYEZI
Langagetsbackandput
shisguni
nthesaf
e.Iwai
t
forhi
m unti
lhesi
tsdownandhesi
ghs.
"DoIneedtocarrymygunar
ound?Shoul
dIst
op
dri
vi
ngmy sel
f?"
,Iaskhi
m.
Hebr
usheshi
sfaceandpul
l
smet
ohi
m.
"
No.We'
l
lhandl
eit
.It
snot
hingbi
g."
Inodandsi
tonhi
slapst
raddl
i
nghi
m.
"
Yousai
dweneededt
otal
k."
Inodandcl
earmyt
hroat
.
"RememberwhenIt
oldy
out
hatIwasst
udy
ing
onli
ne?
"
Henodsandl aysont hebedwi thhishandsunder
hishead.Ipul
ltheenv el
opefrom thebedsideand
handittohim.Het akesitandtakesoutthe
cert
if
icat
e.Hefurrowshi seyebrowsandt hensmil
es.
Hesitupandkissesme.
"
WhatdoIcal
lyou?DrKhuzway
o?"
"
Yes.Ther
api
sti
nthehouse.
"
Hesmi
l
esandki
ssesmeagai
n.
"
I'
m pr
oudofy
ou.
"
Ifeel
mychestwar m upandIshi
verabi
tfr
om t
he
goosebumps.Thosewordssoundsospeci
alt
ome.
"
Hav
eyout
oldy
ourf
ather
?"
Ishakemyheadandhetakesouthi
sphonedi
ali
ng
myDad'snumber
.Itr
ingsandheanswer
s.
"
Mkhweny
ana.
"(Son-
in-
law.
)
"
Baba.I
'
m wi
thUny
ezi
."
Hel
ooksatmeandnods.
"
Baba.
"
"
Ndodakazi
."
"Ngi
phethei
degreeyokubayiTherapi
stl
aesandl
eni
sami.
"(Iam hol
dingaTherapist
sdegreeinmyhand.
)
Ihearshouti
ngandmyauntandmkhul
usv
oice
comest hr
ough.
"
Yil
i
li
li
!Nazoke!Gema!Mshi
ngi
l
a!"
,myauntul
ulat
es
andr
eci
tesmycal
m nameshappi
l
y.
"I
dlozi
li
vumi
lemtanam."(
Theancest
orshav
e
bl
essedyou.
),
Mkhulu.
Mysmi
l
edi
sappear
sandLangal
ooksatme.
"
Byeby
e.Sophi
ndesi
foune.
"(We'
l
lcal
l
.),
Langacut
s
i
n.
Hedr
opst
hecallandl
ooksatme.Heopenshi
s
mout
handIshakemyheadandhenods.
"Al
so.IgavemyCVt oThandoandshehiredme.I
'l
l
bestar
tingnextweek.Ineedsomeonet
olookaft
er
mykidswhileI'
m atwork."
Hel
aysbackdownont
hebedwi
thhi
sey
ebr
ows
f
urr
owed.
"
You'
reonl
ytel
l
ingmeal
lthi
snow?
"
Il
ookdownandpl
aywi
thhem ofhi
sT-
shi
rt
.
"
Iwant
edt
osur
pri
sey
ou.
"
"I
'
m surpri
sedandpr
oudbuty
ouknowIhat
e
surpr
ises.
"
"
Sor
ry?
"
Hef
acepal
msandshakeshi
shead.
"
Waaah.Wher
e'sNkosi
nat
hi?
"
"Hecamebackandsl eptaftertherapy.I
'm starti
ng
tost
ressLanga.It
sbeenay earandst i
llnoprogr ess.
Hechangesgirl
sev er
yweek.Hei salway satthe
gym.Hedoesn'teatdinnerwithus.Hei sn'tbeingan
18yearol
d.I'
ml osi
nghi m."
"
I'
mj ustasworri
edandIdon'
tknowwhatt
odo.I
'
m
t
hinkingofl
ett
ingDadint
erv
ene."
Inodatthi
s.Langamovesundermeandhi
sgroi
n
rubsagai
nstmine.Hedoesi
tagai
nandIputmy
handsonhisabs.
"
Comeher
e."
Ismi l
eandhepul lsmyhandandIf allontopofhim.
Hegr absmyf acegentlyandki ssesmet enderl
y
whilehisotherhandunt i
esmybr aids.I'
mj usti
nhis
T-shir
tsohepul l
sitovermyheadandt hrowsit
acrosstheroom smi r
king.Het raceshi shandtomy
boobsandhesqueezest hem andIl i
ckmyl owerl
i
p.
Her unshishandonmybackandIshi verathis
touch.Ihel
phi m outofhisT-shirt.Hegr absmybutt
andgr indsmef rom thebottom causi
ngmet o
mat chhismov ement s.Myhandspul lhis
sweat pantsdownal ongwi t
hhisCalvinKlei
n
underwearandhel i
ftshisbuttupandki ckst
hem of
f
alongwi thhisshoes.Hiserectandhiscocki s
drippi
ngpr ecum.Hishandt ravelsbetweenmy
thighsandhesl idesmyg- stri
ngtothesideandsl
ips
af i
ngerinsidemyv aginaandIsqui r
m.Hesucksa
breath.
"
You'
resowet
."
"
All
fory
ou.
"
Heuseshisst r
engthandtearsmyg- str
ingandhe
smil
eswinkingatme.I '
m usedtohim doingthi
sby
now.Heli
ftsmeupandIhel pslidehimin.Imoan
andhegroansgr i
ppingmywai stti
ght.Hestart
s
movingunderneathmewhi leholdi
ngmywai stti
ght
andhethrustsaredeep.
.
I'
m aboutt
ocum andLangapull
smyhands.Heis
mov i
ngundermemeandImoan.Mywhol ebody
shakesasIcum.Langadoesn'
tstopmov
ingandI
am shaking.Het hr
ustsonemoretimebefor
e
spill
i
ngallhisseedsinsideme.Heli
ft
smeupand
takeshimselfout.Helaysmeont hebedandI'
m
shaking.Mybodyl ungesfor
wardandImoanasan
aftereff
ectorgasm hit
sme.
"
Shi
t!
",
Langacusses.
Ifeelhim hardenonmyt high.Al oudbangf ol
lowed
byascr eam distur
bshim ashei sabouttopenet rate
meagai n.Wel ookateachot her.Webot hstandup.I
pullhisUnder wearandT- shir
tonf astr
unningout .I
foll
owt her agingscream andbangi nganditsfrom
Nkosi nathisroom.Langast andsnexttomeand
l
ooksatme.Het ri
esopeningt hedoorbutitslocked.
Heki ckst hedooropenandwef i
ndNkosi nathiwith
hisheadbet weenhiskneesandhi sweeping.
"
Babe.Gocheckt
heki
ds.I
'
lldeal
wit
hthi
s."
Inodreluct
antl
yandleav
et hemessyroom.Ihead
forLangasroom andheisn'
tther
e.If
indhimin
Nkanyezisroom andt
hey'r
eplayi
ngcars.
"
Joi
nusmommy
.",
Langa.
"
ComeMama.
",Nkany
ezi
.
Isi
tnextt
othenandgr
abacar
.Myt
hought
swonder
tot
heotherr
oom.

LANGA
Isi
tnextt
ohi
m ont
hef
loor
.Hi
shandsar
ebl
eedi
ng.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
Her
aiseshi
sheadandl
ooksatme.Hel
ookst
ir
ed.
"
What'
swrong?You'
vewr
eckedy
ourbedr
oom.I
sn'
t
t
her
apyhel
ping?
"
"
Whati
sitsupposet
ohel
pwi
thpr
eci
sel
y?"
"
Idon'
tknow.Tel
lme.Thi
sbehav
iour
."
"I
fItal
kedyou'dgotoj
ail
.Doyout
hinkIl
i
kehavi
ng
sl
eeplessnight
s?Ihav
efucki
ngni
ghtmar
es!Hav
e
beenforyears!
"
"Whywoul
dIgot
ojai
l
?Whatni
ght
mar
es?
",
Iask
conf
used.
"
Isawy
ouokay
!Isawy
ou!
"
Hest
andsupangr
il
yandr
unshi
shandonhi
shead.
"Isawy oustrangleher
!Yourhandswrappedfi
rmly
aroundherneckasshechokedandy oulookedint
o
hereyesasshet ookherl
astbreat
h.Youli
edtous
andsaidsher anawayandlef
tusbehind.Doyou
knowt hatthatdidtoLanga?Hegrewupt hi
nki
nghis
ownmot herdidn'
twanthim?Shedidn'
tbuthedidn'
t
knowt hat!
"
Hesit
sdownandcr i
esl
ouder.Isi
ttherel
ooki
ngat
hi
m asIfeelmyhear
tbeatext
remelyfast
.Noway!
Hecouldn'
thav
eseenme!
"Nkosi
nathi.Itwasn'
tme.Iwasn'
tinmyr ightst
ate
ofmind.Phy sical
l
yitwasmebutment all
yad
spir
it
uall
yitwasn'tme.Iknowyouwon' tbeli
eveme
butyourmot herangeredt
heancestor
swi thherli
es
and..
."
IrubmyeyesasIf
eel
them st
ing.Al
lthememor
ies
comeback.
"Khokhot
ookoverme.Str
angledyourmot her
.I
wokeupthenextdayandmyauntGogot he
sangomahadpull
edmeoutoft hetrance.Iam sor
ry
youhadtoseeandkeepthatwit
hy ouforsolong.
I'
m sor
ryIli
edt
oy '
al
lbutIdidntknowhowt ot
ell
y'al
l
.
Iwasscaredy'
al
lmighthatemei fy'
al
lknew.I
'
m so
sorr
yson."
Iwipemytearsandhestandsup.Hehandsmea
handandItakeit
.Heli
ft
smeup.
"IcanneverunseewhatIsaw.Tel
lmom tostopwi
th
thist
herapytal
k.Sandr
aisobli
gat
edtocall
i
ngthe
copsony ouifshefi
ndsout.
"
"Thankyou.Weallhadatherapistwhenwewere
young.I'
l
lcall
yourgrandf
atherandyoucant
alkto
him.I'
m sorr
y."
"I
tsokay.Iwon'
tbesl
eepi
nghomet
oni
ght
.Ineed
somef r
eshair.
"
Inodandwat chhim ashepacksabagandl eaves.I
si
nkbackdownont hefloorandclosemyeyes.That
ki
dwillneverbethesameagai n.Heneverwas
anyway.It
sallmyfault
.

NOXOLO
Ishowhi
mthedr
essandhesmi
l
esatme.
"
It
sperf
ect
.Whatchangedy
ourmi
ndonBl
ackand
r
oyal
gowndress?
"
"
Idon'
tknow.Ihavebeendr
aggingthi
sweddi
ng.It
s
j
ustadress.I
'
m goi
ngtofi
tt
ingnextweekandthen
wecansetadate.
"
"
Final
l
y!"
Il
augh.
"
Shoul
dIdr
opy
'al
lof
f?"
"
Nost
handwa.We'
l
lbeokay
."
Henodsandki
ssesmeandhandsmemykey
s.
"
Sanel
e!"
,heshout
sforhi
m.
"
I'
m comi
ng.
"
Sanel
ecomesr
unni
ngoutf
ixi
nghi
scr
icketbag.
"
Idon'
tunder
standwhyy
'al
lcar
rysuchbi
gbags.
"
"
Younev
erwi
l
lthenmom.
"
Ndabenkhulul
aughsandIpunchhi
m pl
ayf
ull
y.Iki
ss
him goodby
eandhef i
stbumpsSanel
e.Wegetin
thecarandNdabenkhul
ugetsinhi
s.Wedr
iveout
andhoot
.
"
Mom.
"
"
Mmmh?
"
"CanIcal
lMalumeNdabenkhul
uDad?Imeany
ou
guysareget
ti
ngmarr
ied.
"
Isteal
aquickgl
anceathi
m bef
oref
ocusi
ngont
he
roadagai
n.
"
Yes.I
fyouwantt
o.Imean.
..Wow.
"
Ican'thelpt
hetearsthatstream downmyey es.Iam
sopr oudofhowhei swill
ingt oopenupt o
Ndabenkhulutakingafather'sroleinhisli
fe.Thecar
swerv esandbul
letsf
lyinsidethecar .Oni nstinctI
coverSaneleaswhatIassumeasabul letri
ppl es
thr
oughmyar m.Anothergoest hroughmyt highand
Iscream.
"
Sir
ical
lKhuzway
o!"
,Iscr
eam i
npai
n.
"
Cal
l
ingKhuzway
o."
Thephoner
ingsandheanswer
s.
"
Missmeal
ready
?"
"
Wej
ustgotshotdown.
"
"
What
?"
"
We.
..Shot
.Hur
ry.
"
Mywor dssl
urasIl
oseconsci
ousness.Ihope
Sanel
eisokay.

NDABENKHULU
Justaft
erhercal
lIr
eceiveanaler
tfrom her
i
nsurancecompanyandt hey
'r
ealreadytaki
ngthem
tothehospi
tal
.Iam al
readycal
li
ngt heguysthat
fol
lowher.
"
Whot
hef
uckshother
?!"
"Boss.We'
ref
ollowedtheshoot
ingcarandwehav
e
oneoftheguys.Oneranaway.We'r
etakinghi
mto
theHQ."
"
Makesur
ehei
sreadyf
orme!
"
Idropthephoneswearingandgett
ingi
ntomycar .I
dri
veoffinspeedheadingtot
hehospit
al.Whoever
didthi
swillr
egreti
t.Ir
uninsi
dethehospit
alandthe
recept
ioni
stt
ell
smet
owai
t.Adoct
orpassesandI
grabhim.
"
ANoxol
oSi
l
angwe.Shot
.Wher
eisshe?
"
"Err
..
.She'
sst
il
li
ntheat
re.Hersoni
sinwar
d15.2nd
Floor.
"
Il
ethi
m andhefal
l
s.Ir
unt
otheel
evat
orandi
ttakes
ti
mecomingdown.
"
Fuck!
"
Ir
untothestepswhil
etaki
ngoffmyj acket
.Ir
un
ar
oundlooki
ngintoeachwardunt
ilIseeSanel
e.I
walki
nandhislooki
ngatthenews.
"
Fianceandsonofmult
i-
bil
l
ionai
rebusi
nessgur
u
Ndabenkhul
uKhuzway
ohav ebeenshotdown.
"
Iswit
chof
ftheTVandhel
ooksatme.Hehasa
sl
ingonhi
sarm.
"
Heyson.
"
Isi
tont
hechai
rnextt
ohi
sbed.
"
Dad.Howismom?Shest oodint
hewayandshe
t
ookall
thesebul
l
ets.I
..
.She.
..
"
"
Didy
ouj
ustcal
lmeDad?
"
HenodsandIhughi
m.
"
Ouch.
"
"
Sor
ry.Sor
ry.
"
Il
etgoofhi
m andr
ubt
hest
ingof
fmyey
es.
"Ihaven'
theardanyt
hingabouty
ourmom.Theysai
d
she'ssti
l
lintheat
re.
"
"
Ihopeshe'
sokay
.Ican'
tl
oseher
."
"
Met
ooson.Met
oo.
"
Il
aymyheadonhi
sbedandsi
gh.I
'
m soscar
edof
whatt
hedoct
orwi
l
lsay
.

KUHLEKONKE
Idropthecal
landsitdown.Ithoughtshehad
recei
vedherhappil
yeveraft
er.Who'dwanttoshoot
her?Noxolodoesn'
thaveaproblem wit
hanyone.
Bhekikhay
awalksinwithAmanda.Amandat akes
Sneoutofhiscotandsmi l
esatme.Theynot i
cemy
mood.
"
What
'swr
ongsi
si?
"
"
Noxol
o..
.She.
..
"
Iwi
peawaymyt
ear
s.
"
What
'swr
ongPeach?
",
Bheki
khay
a.
"NoxoloandSanelewer
eshotont
hei
rwayt
o
Sanelesschool
."
Amandasi
tsdownandBheki
khay
atakeshi
skey
s.
"
Shi
t!Baf
o!"
Hewalksoutdi
ali
ngonhisphone.Amandashushes
SneandIhandherhisf
eedingbott
le.
"
Wil
ltheybef
ine?
"
Ishrugandmyheartjustdrops.Istandupt oget
somef r
eshai
r.Igotot hebal
conyinmyr oom and
l
ookdown.Ther ear
eguar dsgetti
ngoffSUVswi th
gunsandBhekikhay
ai sorderi
ngthem around.He
tur
nsaroundl
ooksatme.Heput sahandonhi s
chestandmouths.
"
Ilov
eyoupeach.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
ooKhuz
way
o."
Hegetsi
nhiscaranddrivesof
finspeed.Myphone
r
ingsandi
tsMaluda.Ianswer.
"I
sitt
rue?IjustsawNoxoloscaronthenewsl
i
ve
andit
swr ecked.What
'sgoingonKuhle?
"
"I
t'
strue.Idon'
tknowTshegobutwhat
everi
tis,
i
s
abouttotakeusforal
ongr i
de.
"
Shesi
ghsandwesayourgoodby
es.Ical
l
Bheki
khay
atoaskwhat
'sgoi
ngbuthedoesn'
tgi
ve
memuch.Noxol
oandSanelebet
erbeokay.

TSHEGO
Cartyresshri
eki
ngdist
urbmefrom myt
rai
nof
thoughts.Khul
ekani
burst
sthr
oughmydoor.
"
Let
'sgo.
"
"
Khul
ekani
.Gowher
e?"
Hest
art
sthr
owi
ngmycl
othesi
nsi
demysui
tcase.
"
You'
l
lbest
ayi
ngatmyhouse.I
tssaf
ert
her
e.Fuck!
"
"
Iam wor
kingni
ghtshi
ft
.Ican'
tbeaty
ourhouse.
"
"
Qui
twor
k."
"
What
?Ihav
efeest
opayf
or.
"
"I
'
llpayyourf
eesmanMal
uda!Youwon'
tbegoi
ngt
o
schooli
fyou'
redead!
"
Hepullsmebymyhandandher unswit
hmeoutto
hi
scar.Therear
eguar
dsnextt
ohi m wi
thAK-
47and
bul
letproof
s.
"
Khul
ekani
kwenzakal
an?
"(what
'sgoi
ngn?
),Iask
wor
ri
edl
y.
Het hr
owsmeal ookandwegeti ntohiscar .The
guardstakethesuitcasetothebigblackcar s.They
fol
lowusaswedr iv
eof fandI'm gett
ingfrustrat
ed.
Arewei ndanger?Ican'tevenaskt hi
sZul uman
causehe'l
l gi
veme' theeye'onl
yandIdontl i
kethe
angryhim soIjustmi ndmyownbusi ness.

NKOSI
NATHI
Dadfetchedmef rom myapartmentwi
thSbhamu
andtheotherguards.AuntNoxol
oandSanelegot
gunnedtodayinthemor ni
ngandevery
oneisal
lover
thepl
ace.Mom ismakingussomet hi
ngtoeatwith
Nkanyezi
andLangaonhersi deli
ketheygl
uedthere.
Myphoner i
ngsandeveryonelooksatme.I
t'
s
Amanda?Iansweritandexcusemysel f
.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
"
Hey
."
"
Hey
."
"
Soy
ou'
reback?
"
"
Yeah.Camebacky
est
erday
."
"
Nice.
"
"
Yeah.
"
"
LookManda.I
tski
ndofhect
icr
ightnow.CanIcal
l
y
oulat
er?
"
"
Okayby
e."
"
Bye.
"
Idropthecallandlookatmyphone.She'
sback.I
wanttoclapar oundandsi
ngbutknowinghowmuch
Il
ov eherbutstil
lcan'
thav
eherbrushesmeoffthe
wrongway .Isitnextt
oDadandheput shi
sarm over
me.
"
Whydonty
ouj
ustt
ell
herhowy
ouf
eel
?"
"Shewantsmet odeal wi
thmyissuesbefor
ewecan
pursueanythi
ng.Ilosemytemperalotanditscar
es
her.Ican'
tevenpinchawomanbutshei sn'
ttaki
ng
chances."
Hel
ooksatmeandnods.
"
Irui
nedy
oudi
dn'
tI?
"
"
Huh?
"
"
Whaty
ousaw.I
trui
nedy
oudi
dn'
ti
t?"
"
May
beal
i
ttl
e."
"
Yourmotherhasbeencompl
aini
ngaboutt
hegi
rl
s
y
ou'bang'
.
"
Ichuckl
e.
"
Ifi
twer
eupt
omom.I
'
dbeav
irgi
nbynow.
"
Hel
aughs.
"It
oldheraboutqui
tt
ingt
her
apyandsheagreed.
Shecall
edSandraandshesai
dshecan'
tletyou
cancelt
her
apyl
i
ket
hat
.Shei
nsi
stsy
ouneedher
hel
p."
"
Yeahr
ight
."
Hel
ooksatmebef
orel
aughi
ng.
"
Yousl
eptwi
thherdi
dn'
tyou?
"
It
ryi
gnor
inghi
m bychangi
ngchannel
s.
"
Youdi
d!"
"
Sshh.Mom wi
l
lheary
ou.
"
Heput
shi
sfi
stsonhi
smout
hst
if
li
nghi
slaught
er.
"
Sodi
dyou?
"
"Yes.Shekeptaski
ngmequest
ionsandi
twas
pissi
ngmeof f.
"
"
Yourmot
herwi
l
lki
l
lyoui
fshef
oundout
."
"
Foundoutwhat
?",
Mom.
Weal
mostj
umpoutofourseat
sinf
ear
.
"
Not
hing.What
'shappeni
ngatt
hehospi
tal
?",
Dad.
"She'
sinani
nducedcoma.Shehadtwobul
l
ets.One
onherarm.Oneonherthi
gh.Sheal
sobr
okear i
b
f
rom t
hef
orceshehi
tthest
eer
ingwheel
."
,Mom.
"
Sanel
e?"
,Dad.
"Ndabenkhul
uisdr
oppi
nghi
m of
fher
e.Hesounds.
..
Idon'
tknow.",
Mom.
"I
'
llbegoingwithhi
m whenhearri
ves.Ther
eare
guardsoutsi
de.Don'
tl
eavethehouse."
,Dad.
Hest andsupandr unsupstair
sast heguardsalert
usthatMalumeNdabenkhul uisherewithSanele.
Dadr unsdownstai
rsandmeet sSaneleonhisway
out.Hegreetsandr unsout
.Langar unstoSanel e
askinghim howhef eel
s.Mom l ooksatmeandI
shrug.Igotomyr oom tochanget hangodownt o
thegy m.Mymi ndiscrowdedandIcan' tevenleave
thehouse.
54
THANDO
Ozocal
l
smeandtell
smehisoutsi
de.Itel
lthe
guar
dstol
ethi
min.Hewal
ksinandsitsnexttome.
"
Youst
oodmeup.Agai
n."
"
Didn'
tyousayy
ouwer
eleav
ing?
"
Hechuckl
esandl
ooksatme.Het
urnsmyheadt
o
l
ookathim.
"
Iam here.Imissedmyf l
i
ghtcauseIhadt
hehopes
t
hatyou'dpull
up.Ilostabil
l
iondeal
causeIneeded
t
oseey ou."
Il
ookathi
m andher
ubshi
sthumbsundermyey
es.
"
What
'swr
ong?Youhav
eey
ebags.Youl
ookt
ir
ed.
"
"Myfamil
ymaybei ndanger
.Mybr ot
her'
swifewas
shotyest
erdayandwe'
reonlockdownthat'
swhyI
coul
dn'tmakeit
."
"
Whatdoy
oumeany
ourf
ami
l
ymi
ghtbei
ndanger
?"
"
Exact
lyt
hat
."
"
Youmi
ghtbei
ndanger
?"
Hetakesouthi
sphoneandexcuseshi
msel
f.He
comesbacklat
er.
"Myguysar
eont
hei
rway
.Yoursecur
it
yai
n'
t
enough.
"
Il
ookathi
m.
"
What
?Mysecur
it
yisf
ine.
"
"
Idon'
tcar
e.Mymenar
emor
eel
i
te.
"
Il
ookathi
m ashet
akesof
fhi
sjacket
.
"
Ial
way
sseey
oui
nsui
ts.
"
"
Icameher
ebef
orewor
k.Ij
ustdr
oveher
einst
ead.
"
"
Isee.
"
"
Hav
eyoueat
en?
"
"Mybrother
sorderedmesomepizza.Not
hingst
ays
down.I'
m agit
atedandf
rust
rat
ed.
"
"
Icancooki
fit
'sokaywi
thy
ou.
"
Ist
andupandIlookathi
m.Hi
stal
l
ert
hanmeand
ver
yint
imi
dat
ing.
"Whatdoyouwantf r
om meOzo?I t
sbeenayear
andyousti
ll
persi
stent.Don'
tyouhaveawi
fe?
Gir
lf
ri
end?Alif
e?"
"
Ihav
eawi
fe.
"
"
Oh.
"
Hecomescl
osertomeandholdsmebyt hewai
st.I
t
rypul
l
inghi
shandsawaybuthisst
rongert
hanme.
"
Pleasel
eav
e.Yourwi
femi
ghtbewor
ri
ed.
"
Hechuckl
esandpul
lsmecloser
.Iputmyhandson
hi
sfi
rm chest
.Hesmel
lssogood.
"
Youdon'
tseem wor
ri
edt
ome.
"
"
Huh?
"
"
Yousai
dmywi
femi
ghtbewor
ri
ed.You'
remywi
fe.
"
"
Sli
ck.Youcanl
eav
e.I
'
llcookonmyown.
"
"
Letmegetcooki
ng.
"
Heperksmylipsandlet
'smego.Hewalksgot
he
kit
chenrol
l
inguphisshi
rtt
ohisel
bows.Whatt
he
fuck?
!
"Gotakeashowerwhil
eImakey
ousomet
hing.
",he
shoutsfr
om t
hekit
chen.
Il
ookathim asheopensmycupboardssi
ngi
ng
somesong.Ishakemyheadandgotomyr oom.I
str
ipnakedandgeti
nthebat
hroom.Ideci
deona
col
dshower.

NDABENKHULU
We'v
ebeenatHQsinceyest
erdayandwest
il
lnot
get
ti
ngsomeanswers.
"Baf
o.Ehli
saumoya.
"(Br
other
.Cal
m
down.)
,Khul
ekani
hol
dsmeback.
Ipushhim awayandgr
abthemanwho' s
responsi
blef
ormyfamil
iesshoot
ing.
"Lal
ela!Ukoziny
anel adl
iwazingwenyakwaceba
i
zizi
ba!"(Li
stenher e!Nothi
nghappenswit
hout
consequences.),Ishoutinhisface.
"
Boss.
"
Weallt
urnar
oundandSkhal
itakesof
fhi
shat
wr
ingi
ngiti
nhishands.
"
Yini
?"(
What
?),
Langaaskhi
m.
"Agroupofel it
esol di
ersjustarri
vedandar et
aki
ng
ourmenout .Theysayt heywer eorderedbya
SbusisoBut hel
ezi.Ididabackgr oundcheck.An
i
nternationalbusinessguru.Hugei nvest
or.Nowif
e.
Noki ds.Justhismot herandf ather
.No
si
bli
ngs. ",
Skhali
.
Ilookathi
m andnod.Hel
eav
esandIcal
lsomeof
theguys.
"Makesurehetal
ks.Fr
yhi
sbal
l
sify
ouhav
eto.
",
I
orderbar
king.
Theynodandgrabt heculpr
it
.Igr
abmyjacketand
gunandwel eav
e.Khulekanii
stheonedr
ivi
ng.We
reachThandosplaceandourmenareoutsi
de.
"
What
'sgoi
ngonher
e?"
,Bheki
khay
a.
Themenpointinsi
deandtheyardisfi
ll
edwithmen
wit
hguns.Langaopensthegateandwewal kin.
Theypoi
ntgunsatusandwepul loutourown.
"Bhut
i!I
ma!Sbusisotel
lthem t
oputt
hei
rguns
down!",
Thandoscreamsdressedi
nhert
owel.
Theguynextt
oherr
aiseshi
shandandt
heyputt
hei
r
gunsdown.
"
ThandolwethuBeautyKhuzway
o!Kwenzakal
ani
l
a?!
",Langashoutsangri
l
y.
"
Ubani
lo?
"(Who'
sthi
s?)
,Bheki
khay
aasks.
Thandoi
sjustst
aresatuswi
de-
eyed.
"
I'
m Sbusi
soBut
hel
ezi
.ThandosBoy
fri
end.
",
theguy
t
alks.
"
Thandoswhat
?",
Khul
ekani
asks.
"
Boy
fri
end.
",heanswer
s.
TheguyscockstheirgunsandThandoj
umpsi
n
fr
ontoft
hisSbusiso.
"
Imani
."(
Wai
t.
),
Itel
lthem.
Theyputt
hei
rgunsdown.Iwal
kcl
osert
othet
wo.
"
Uyasazi
thi
na?
"(Doy
ouknowus?
),Iask.
"Ido.
..Babehlehl
a."(
Mov
e),
hesay
smaki
ngThando
standbesidehim.
"
Siwobani
?"(
Whoar
ewe?
),Iask.
"Abaf
ana.
..
"(Boy
s..
.)
,hecl
ear
shi
sthr
oatwhen
Thandopi
ncheshim.
"AmadodanaakaKhuzway
o."(
Khuzway
o
sons.
),
Sbusi
so.
"
Whatdoy
ouwantwi
thoursi
ster
?",
Iask.
Helooksatherandsmil
esabi
t.It
hrowal
ookt
othe
guy
sandLangashr ugs.
"Il
oveher.Imadesomer einf
orcementsonher
secur
it
yjustasy oudi
dwi t
hyourwives.Sor
ryIdi
dn'
t
i
nformyou.",heanswers.
Hispr
idef
ul.Hel
ooksatThandowhor
ubsherar
m.
She'
sfeel
ingawkwar
d.
"
Thando.Doy
ouknowt
hisman?
",Khul
ekani
.
Shenods.
"
Ishey
ourboy
fri
end?
",
Langa.
Shelooksathim andthanus.HelooksatherandI
am looki
ngateveryemotiongoi
ngpasshi sey
es.So
farhisgenui
ne.Helooksatherl
ikeIlookatNoxol
o.
Hecan'tloveher
.Hisnottheone.
"
Yes.
",Thandol
i
es.
Langapushest hr
ought hem andget
sin.Wef ol
low
him andIl ookatthesetwoagain.Heputshishand
onherl owerbackandl eanstowardsherki
ssingher
temple.Theset woar enotdati
ngbutther
e's
somet hinghere.
"
Gogetdressed.I
'
llst
aywi
thy
ourbr
other
s."
,he
whi
sper
s.
Iwal
kinsi
deandsitnextt
otheTV.Iswi
tchi
toff
.He
comesinandThandogoestoherroom.Hesi
tsona
chai
rinf
rontofus.Weall
keepqui
et.
"
Arey
oudat
ingmysi
ster
?",
Khul
ekani
asks.
"Honestyno.Iwouldli
keiti
fwepursuesomethi
ng
genuine.I
'veknownherforayearandIl
ovedherthe
fi
rstt
imeIsawheratt hemal l
aft
ersheknockedmy
carmi r
rorout.
",
Sbusi
so.
"Doyouthi
nkt
hisi
samov
ie?Oranov
elper
haps?
",
Khul
ekani.
"
No.Doy
ou?
",Sbusi
so.
Mmmmh.Imakeaf
aceandBheki
khay
asni
cker
s.
"
Nei
therdoI
."
,Khul
ekani
.
Wegobackt
obei
ngqui
et.Thi
sissoawkwar
d.
"
Doy
ouknowThandoi
sav
irgi
n?"
,Langa
"
Yes.
",Sbusi
so
"Youwil
lnotbangmysist
er.Youwon'
tdoasmuch
assti
ckyourtonguedownherthr
oat
."
,Langa.
"
Okay
.That
senoughBhut i
.Iam ol
denought
omake
myownchoi
ces.
",Thandojumpsin.
"
No.You'
renothav
ingsexThando.
",Langa.
"I
'
mi nmy20s.Whatdoy
ouexpectmet
odo?
",
Thando.
"
Any
thi
ngbutsex.
",Langa.
"
Leav
eherbaf
o."
,Bheki
.
"
NoBaf
o.Yi
nganel
e."(
She'
sachi
l
d.)
,Langa.
"
Okayokay .Thandowewil
ltal
ktoy
oul
ater
.Ni
na
l
etsgo.
",Isaystandi
ng.
Il
ookatSbusi
so.
"
Went
sizwa.Ki
ndl
ytakeast
epback.Youhav
en'
t
weddedoursi
stert
her
efor
eshe'
sst
il
lour
r
esponsi
bil
i
ty.
"
Henodsatmywor
dsandIpul
lthesebi
gheaded
f
ool
swithme.
"
Thatmanneedst
oleav
e."
,Bheki
.
"
Iagr
ee.
",Langa.
"Y'
allhavetocomet oter
msthatThandowil
lhave
sex.Y'al
lmadet hepoorki
dbeav i
rgi
nti
ll
thi
slong.
Asambe! "
,Khulekani
.
Igeti
ntot
hecarandtheyfol
lowmumbl i
ng.Fool
s.I
dri
vetoHQ.Wehav ebi
ggerprobl
emsthanThando
havi
ngsex.Idr
opthem of
fanddrivet
othehospit
al.

UNYEZI
It
rycall
i
nghim agai
nandhef
inal
lypicksup.Il
etout
asighofrel
i
efassoonasheanswers.
"
Babe.Youf
ine.
"
"
Ofcour
seI
'
mfi
ne.
",Langa.
"
Wher
ear
eyou?Youdi
dn'
tcomehomel
astni
ght
.I
waswor
ked.It
hought
-"
"
Calm down.I
'mfine.Iwaswi
tht
heguy
s.I
'
m onmy
wayhome.",
Langa.
"
Okay
.Il
ovey
ou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Idropthecal
landheaddownst ai
rs.Langaand
Sanelearewatchi
ngmov ies.Aki
ssingscenecomes
onandt heyl
augh.Idi
ots.
"
Wher
e'sNkany
ezi
?"
"
Wit
hPl
uto.
",Langa.
IheadtoPluto'
sroom andNkanyezi
isbrushi
nghis
fur
.Wait.Whyisn'
tPlut
ksstomachmov i
ng?Ikneel
nexttohim andshakehim.Hi
stongueissti
cki
ng
out.
"
No.No.Nkany
ezi
howl
onghashebeenl
i
ket
his?
"
"Idon'
tknow.Tholeelel
e."(
Foundhi
m sl
eepi
ng.
),
he
answersinnocent
ly.
"
Okay
.Got
oyourbr
other
smybaby
."
Henodsandr
unsof
fexci
tedl
y.Idon'
tev
enhav
ethe
str
engthtorepri
mandhim.Ili
ftPl
utoupandintot
he
garden.It
ameashov elanddogunderourPeach
Tree.TheGardnercomestome.
"
Ma'
am.Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
"
"
Diggi
ngagr
ave.
",
Ianswerwi
pingsnotof
fmyf
ace.
"
Letmehel
p."
,heof
fer
s.
"
No.Letme.
"
Hel ooksskepti
calatfi
rstbutgivesinandleaves.I
keeponwi pingmyt ear
swi thmyj acketasIdi
ga
grave.Isi
tdownt i
redandcr y.Iknewhewassi ck.I
didntthi
nkhe'ddiesoear l
y.Iwonderi fi
twaspainf
ul.
"
Babe.
"
Itur
nt ot
hesoundofLangasvoi
ce.Hewalks
towardsmeslowl
y.HelooksatPl
uto,
thehal
fdug
graveandme.
"
Ishe.
..
?"
Inodandhecloseshi
seyes.Hetakest
heshov
el
from me.Her
oll
suphissl
eevesandstar
tdi
ggi
ng.I
holdPlut
oinmyarms.GodknowshowmuchIl ov
ed
thisdog.
"
Baby
.Layhi
min.
"
Iputhimi nsl owlyandbr ushhi sf ur.Itakeoffhis
coll
arandmov eaway .Langat hrowst hesandi nside
andIwat chi tcov eri
ngupPl uto'sf urryframe.Igo
callt
heboy s.Weal lstandar oundt hegr ave.Nobody
saysany thi
ng.Pl utowasmybestf riend.Thebest
nannyf orthekidsi couldev erfind.Hewasa
l
ikeabledog.Ev erybodyl ovedPl uto.Af teroursil
ent
buri
alwegobacki nside.Langaf ollowsmet oour
bedroom.
"
Youokay
?"
Inodandgetintohisarms.Hedoesn'tsayanymore
butt
akesoffhisshoes.Iwaitforhi
m ashetakesof
f
hi
sshir
t.Wegeti nbedandIl ayonhischest
.
"
Howi
sev
ery
thi
ngsof
ar?
"
"Unclear
.Theguywehavewon'tgi
veanyoneup.We
hadanencounterwit
hThandosboyfr
iend.Myl
it
tl
e
sist
erisgoingt
ostar
thavi
ngsex."
"She'
snotli
tt
leanymore.Shenewst
ost ar
tli
vi
ng
especi
all
yaft
erthatSt
hembisoguybrokeher.
"
"
Iknowbuti
t'
shar
d."
"
Nothi
ngishard.Accepti
t.Oh.If
inal
l
ycancel
l
ed
Nat
hist
herapy
."
Hel
ooksatmeandbef
orenoddi
ng.
"
Nkosi
nat
hisawev
ery
thi
ng.
"
"
Sawwhat
?"
Hekeepsqui
etf
orawhi
l
e.Inot
icehi
sey
esgl
aze
ov
er.
"
Hesawi
twhenIki
l
ledhi
smot
her
."
"
Wai
twhat
?"
Henodsandr
ubshi
sey
es.Hel
i
ftsmyheadand
get
sup.
"
Didy
'al
ltal
kabouti
t?"
Henodsandstandsupgoi ngtothebat hroom.I
fol
l
owhim buthehaslockedthedoor .Ileanontoi
t
andsi
gh.Letmegivehim space.It
akemyphone
andmyFacebookishavingadayatt hemar ket
.
"
Unyezi
Khuzway
oiscohabit
ingwi
thanot
her
woman'
sman.Mysist
erlef
twhenshethr
eat
ened
her.Shetur
nedmysi st
erski
dsagainstus.What
ki
ndofwomanbasksi nanotherwoman'stear
s?She
actsall
holycauseshei san'acti
vi
st'
whil
eshei sa
homewr ecker.You'r
enotevenmar ri
edtothatman
al
readyclai
minghi ssurname."
Sheeventaggedme.NtokozoMay
ezai
sher
accountname.Icomment.
"Inev
ersai
dIwasanact i
vi
st.Futhiwhoareyou?
Stopbei
ngbit
terandactmatured.Umdalaforthi
s."
Sher epliescal
li
ngmenamesandIj ustleavethem
there.Mi neandLangasmar riageandhowi tworksis
forthebot hofus.Incour tI
'm offi
ciallyhisand
tradi
tionall
y.Justbecausewedi dn'thav eahuge
weddi ngdoesn'tmeanwe' r
enotmar ri
ed.Iscrol
l
downmynewsf eedandpeopl eareshar ingthat
postsay ingI'
m agol ddigger.Oneev enwentasf ar
ascal l
ingmea' t
rophywi f
e'.Whyi sal lt
his
happeni ng?Thev erysameNt okozot aggedme
againbutwi thNoxol o,
KuhleandTshego.
"They
'r
eagroupofgol
ddigger
s.Theyt
arget
edthe
Khuzwayomensotheycanconthem.I
tcantbea
coincidencet
hatf
ri
endsar
edat
ingagr
oupof
brothers.
"
Whatthefuckist
his?Ibl
ockanddeleteherposts
anddeact
ivat
emyFacebookaccount .Wedon'tneed
thi
sri
ghtnow.Noxoloisi
nhospit
al.Heck!Mydog
j
ustdi
es.Langagetsoutwrappedinatowel?
"
Who'
sNt
okozoMay
eza?
"
"
Bongekassi
ster
.Why
?"
"
Theonet
hatoncecal
l
ed?
"
Henodsl
ooki
ngatme.Ishowhi
mthescr
eenshot
s.
"Whati
sthi
s?Imety
ouaf
terBongeka.It
houghtI
pai
dheroff
."
Hetakeshi
sphoneanddi
alsbef
oreput
ti
ngi
tonhi
s
ear
.
"WhyisNtokozoharassi
ngmywife?
!What?
!Why
am Ionl
yfindi
ngoutnowaboutthi
s?!Whyi
sshe
backinSA?!Argh!I
'
m coming!
"
Hedr
essesupi
nahast
e.
"
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
"
"
I'
ll
beback.
"
Hekissesmycheekandleav
es.Whatthef
ucki
s
goi
ngon?Ihaveafeel
ingsomeoneisoutt
ogetus.

KUHLEKONKE
Bheki
khay
awalksinlooki
ngt
ir
ed.Ihandhim acup
ofcof
feeandheadformyphone.Iscr
oll
thr
oughmy
ti
meli
neandhandhim myphone.
"
Read.
"
Helooksatmeconfusedbef
orer
eadi
ng.Hecl
icks
hi
stonguebef
orety
pingonmyphoneandputsiti
n
hi
spocket.
"Who'sthi
sNtokozo?She'
sbeenatusall
mor ni
ng.
Unyezievendeact
ivat
edheraccount
.What'
sgoing
onBabakaSne? "
Hestandsupandrubshi
sface.Hepul
l
smet
ohi
m
andkissmyfor
ehead.
"Idon'
tknowMawakhe.I '
mtry
ingtoconnectthe
dotshere.Thi
sseemslikeadist
ract
ion.Somethi
ng
bigiscomingandbecauseofthatIhavetgoback."
"
Youhav
en'
tsl
ept
."
"Iknow.I'
mt i
redbutIcan'
tsl
eepwhi
l
ether
eis
dangerlur
king."
Inodandheki ssesmepassionatel
y.Ihoodonto
hi
mf ordearli
fe.Hepullbackandlayshisf
orehead
onminewi t
hhi seyescl
osed.
"
Ilov
eyouPeach.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Hehol
dsmeti
ght
lyandwebot
hsi
gh.Amanda
wal
ksi
nwit
hacryi
ngSne.
"
Comeher
eKhuzway
oomncane.
",
Bheki
khay
a
Amandahandshi
m Sneandheki
sseshi
m al
lov
er
hi
sfacecausi
nghi
mt ogi
ggl
e.
"
Ihav
etot
akeashowerandgoback.
"
Inodandt
akeSnef
rom hi
m.
"
Let
'sgobat
hbabyandcal
lSanel
e."
"
Sisi
.Ineedsomet
oil
etr
ies.
"
"
Wri
teev
ery
thi
ngdownandgi
vei
ttoaguar
dout
side.
They
'l
lbr
ingi
t.
"
Shenodsanr unsupstair
s.Ilookformyphoneuntil
I
reali
seBhekikhayahasit.Igoupst ai
rst
obaththi
s
l
ittl
eone.Iwant edtocheckuponUny eziand
TshegoguessI 'l
lcal
lthem later
.Ican'
tevengovi
sit
Noxolosincewe' r
enotallowedout si
de.

TSHEGO
"
Whyar
eyousost
ubbor
n?"
"I
'
m notst ubborn.I
tscal
ledindependence.I
'
m not
withyoufory ourmoney.I'
m alr
eadybeingcall
eda
golddigger!
"
"I
'
m nothav i
ngthisconversat
ionr
ightnow.Il
etyou
havey our'
i
ndependency'butIwon'thavemywoman
workingatarestaurant
.You'r
eevenbehindonyour
school wor
k.FuckitmahnMal uday ou'
vel
ost
weight!"
"
Youknowwhat
?"
It
hrowmyhandsi
ntheai
randwal
kaway
.
"
Segongi
sakhul
umanawe.
"(I
'
m st
il
ltal
ki
ngt
oyou.
)
Ii
gnorehim andgotohisr
oom.Myphonebeeps
agai
nforthethousandt
hti
mesinceIwokeup.That
gi
rli
satitagain.
"Daught
erofapedophi
leandrapi
st.I'
m sur
eyou
helpedyourdadt
raf
fi
cthosechil
dren.
"
Whatswrongwit
hthisgi
rl
?Myf
oll
ower
sand
Facebookf
ri
endsdragher
.
"
Giv
emey
ourphone.
"
IturnaroundandKhul
ekanihashishandsi nhi
s
pocketwithhist
humbsoutandt humpi ngonhi
s
j
eans.Ihandittohi
m.Het akesitandreadsit
throughandIseehishol
dtight
enar oundit.
"
Babe.
"
Hel
ooksatme.Ihol
dhi
shandandheeaseshi
sgr
ip.
"
It
'sokay
.Itdoesn'
taf
fectme.Nei
thershoul
ditt
o
y
ou."
"
I'
ll
stopt
hisbabyIswear
."
Inodandwr
apmyarmsar
oundhi
stor
so.Hel
ays
hi
schinonmyhead.
"
Iknowy
ouwi
l
l.Ihat
eitwhenwef
ight
."
"You'
retheoneal way sf
ighti
ng.You'
realways
chall
engingmeandi tpi
ssesmeof f.Justacceptmy
money .Idon'
twor kmybut tofff
ormywomant o
workasawai tress.Dadalmostkill
edmewhenhe
foundout .
"
"
I'
mjustusedt
odoingsomethi
ng'
sonmyown.I
l
oveyouandnoty
ourwall
et.
"
"
IknowbutI
'
dlov
eiti
fyou'
dspendmymoney
."
"
I'
ll
try
."
Henodsandki
ssesmyheadbef
orepul
l
ingaway
.
"
Ihav
etogo.
"
"
Agai
n?"
"
Yes.I
fyouneedany
thi
ngpl
easet
ell
theguar
ds.
"
Inodandheki ssesme.Ir
ubatthestubbl
egrowi
ng
andfeeli
tscratchmyfi
ngert
ips.Isi
ghint
otheki
ss
andrel
axintohishol
d.

NKOSI
NATHI
Ihavebeenupsi nce05h00am andIhavebeenat
thegym since.Mybodyi sachingbutIkeepongoi
ng.
Igetof
fthet readmillandgotakeabottl
eofwater
.
Mom wal ksinandst andbythedoor.
"
Breakf
asti
sready
.Ar
en'
tyouhungr
y?"
"
I'
ll
bet
her
emom.
"
Igulpdownthewaterandadi
zzyspel
lhit
sme.I
holdontot
hetabl
eandMom walksclosertome.
"
Boy
?"
"
I'
m..
.Ar
gh.
..Fi
ne.
"
Igetagr
ipofmysel
fandIst
andupr
ight
.Mom l
ooks
atmewithworr
y.
"Youdidn'
teatdinnery
ester
day.Youdidn'
teat
breakf
ast.You'
reexhaust
ingyourbodywithal
lthese
exerci
ses."
"
You'
readoct
ornowhuh?
"
Shel
ooksatmeandIr
ubmyey
es.
"
Sor
rymom.Idi
dn'
tmeant
o."
Shecl
i
ckshert
ongueandl
eav
es.It
rywal
ki
ngaf
ter
herbutmybodyf ail
smeandIfall
withaloudt
hump.
Myv i
sionblur
sasIseeblackspot
scloudmyvisi
on.
Ihearrunni
ngfootst
epsandmom' sv
oice.
"
Ohmt
anam.
"(Mychi
l
d.)
If
eel
mysl
efsl
i
pint
ounconsci
ousness.

NDABENKHULU
Irecei
vedacal
lfr
om mybrother
sinthemorni
ng
tel
li
ngmeaboutBongekassist
erbei
ngbackintown
andcyberbul
ly
ingthegi
rl
s.
"Segoisgoi
ngt ogiv
emeahassl
ebef
orecomi
ng
here.
",Khul
ekani.
We'reatasafehouseinKwaNdongaziyaduma.Itsa
goodmi l
eawayf r
om Durban.IhadNoxolobought
hereandhir
edanur seanddoctor.She'
sgoingto
wakeupt omorrow.IdontknowwhatI '
l
lsaytoher
whensheseeksanswer sasIdon'thaveanyright
now.
"Idon'
tcar
ehowt heygether
e.Dadi
sgoi
ngtobe
stayi
nginthecot
tagewithhi
swoman.We'
ll
be
occupyi
ngthi
shouse.Itsbi
genohghforeveryone.I
spoketotheChiefandhewil
lmakesurenoone
enter
shister
ri
torywit
houtbr
ief
ingus.
",It
ell
them.
"It
hinkNtokozoknowswhoor der
edt hathi
ton
NoxoloandSanele.Itcan'tbeacoinci
dencethatshe
comesbackandherf atherthr
eat
ensusandt han
Noxologetsshot.
",Bhekikhaya
"MaybebutwhatIdontgetiswhygoaf
terNoxol
o
andnotmyfamily.
",Langa.
"
Whati
fit
sNoxol
osex?
",Khul
ekani
.
"MaybebutIhavemyguy
sont
hei
nsi
dewat
chi
ng
hisever
ymov e.
",
Isay
.
"Notev
eryguyisonourpay
rol
l
.Maybehehas
someonedoinghisdi
rt
yworkf
orhi
m.",
Bheki
khay
a.
"
Payhi m av
isi
t.Somethi
ngistel
lingmethathehas
Nkanyambainhiscorner
.WhatIdon'tgeti
s
Ntokozo.Wher
edoesshef i
tin?"
,Langa.
Weal
lsi
tdownandwet
rymaki
ngsenseofat
his.
"
Cal
lthatSbusi
soguy
.",
Khul
ekani
.
"
Why
?",
Langa.
"Wealldontl
i
kehim butheseemsl
i
kehehasa
greatel
it
efor
ce.
",Khul
ekani
.
"
Idon'
thav
ehi
snumber
s."
,Isayhent
heyl
ookatme.
IdobutI
'
m notcal
l
inghi
m.
"
Okayt
han.I
'
m cal
l
ingThando.
",Khul
ekani
.
Hedi
alshernumber
sandi
tri
ngsf
orawhi
l
e.
"
Hel
l
o."
,theSbusi
soguyanswer
s.
Langar
oll
shi
sey
esandmumbl
es.
"
Wher
eisThando?
",Khul
ekani
.
"Shei
spacki
ngf
ort
hatsaf
ehouseofy
our
s."
,
Sbusi
so.
"
Giv
ehert
hephone.
",Khul
ekani
.
Il
ookathi
m.Di
dn'
thesayhewant
edt
otal
ktot
his
guy?
"Y'
al
lreal
lythinky'
al
l arehidi
ngwher
ey'al
lat
?Just
becausey'al
linthemi ddl
eofmountai
nsdoesn'
t
meany '
al
l unseen.
",Sbusiso.
Igest
urewi
thmyhandf
orKhul
ekani
togi
vet
he
phonetome.Hehandsitover
.Iputi
tof
f
l
oudspeakerandst
andup.Iwalkawayf
rom t
he
guys.
"
Sbusi
so.Doy
ouv
aluemysi
ster
ssaf
ety
?"
"
Yes.
"
"
Hel
pus.Bor
rowussomeofy
ourmen.
"
"
Thati
seasy
."
"
Idon'tknowwhatyourst
oryi
swi
thmysi
sterbut
t
reatherli
keshe'
sanegg."
"Youdon' thavetoworr
yaboutyoursist
er.Just
causeIknowy ourf
atherI'
m wi
ll
i
ngt ohelpyall
out.
I'
llsendov ermygeekguyandPI.Wi t
hyourteam
andmi necombinedI'
m surewe'
llf
indwho'soutfor
y'al
l.
",Sbusiso.
"
Thanksman.
"
Wedr
opt
hecallandIlookatt
heguys.Iwal
k
t
owar
dst
hem andstandinfr
ontoft
hem.
"
TellDadwe'
recomingover.Cal
lyourwomenand
t
ell
them t
opack."
,It
ell
them.
IhandKhul
ekanihi
sphoneandhenods.Il
eavet
o
checkonNoxoloandshe'
ssl
eepi
ngpeaceful
l
y.
"I
'
llbebackbabe.
"
Ikissherdryli
psandherf or
ehead.Iwalkoutand
tellt
hedoctortokeepagoodey eonher.Ihaven't
sleptatal
landIwon' tbeti
ll
wef indoutwho's
behindallt
his.Theseleadspoint
st odi
ff
erentplaces.
Myphonepi ngsandIl ookatthemessagef rom
Skhali.
"
Thehi
tmant
alked.
"
Ithr
owmyphoneatLangaandgrabmykeysasthey
readthr
oughi
t.Weal
lgeti
ntoourcar
sraci
ng.

THANDO
Ipopmypi
ll
sanddri
nkwat
er.Il
ookatt
hebot
tl
eof
pil
l
sandr
otat
eiti
nmyhand.
"
You'
redone?
"
Ij
umpi nshockandquickl
yshovethepi
ll
sinmy
sui
tcaseandzipi
t.It
urnaroundandgiv
ehim at
ight
smil
e.
"
You'
reokay
?",
heasks.
"
Yeah.Yeah.Uhm.
..Whenar
eyoul
eav
ing?
"
Helaughsandwal
ksi
nsi
decl
osi
ngt
hedoorbehi
nd
hi
m.
"Thando.Ayearhaspassedandyou'r
esti
llr
unni
ng
from me.Il
oveyou.Genuinel
y.Whatarey
ouso
scaredof?"
"Whati
fyoureali
seinthelongrunthatI'
m nott
he
oneyou'
rel
ookingfor?Plusyou'
reolderthanme."
Hehol
dmywai
standr
ubsonmeusi
nghi
sthumbs.
"I
'm notanoldman.I'
m oldenoughtoknowwhatI
want .I
'
m oldenoughtoknowwhenandwi thto
sett
ledownwi th.I
'
m 7y ear
soldert
hanyou.More
wiser.Inev
erthoughtI
'dlovesomeoneasyoungas
youbutIdo."
Il
ookdownandhel
i
ftsmychi
nupwi
thhi
sindex
fi
nger
.
"
I'm notgoi
ngt
opressur
izeyouintodoingany
thing
you'
renotcomfor
tabl
ewith.Yourbrot
herswouldkil
l
me."
Il
aughandhesmi les.Hedoesn'tlook30butwhen
het al
ksyoucanhearf rom hi
swor dsthathismatur
e
andgr own.Hesleptheretonightandhadoneofhi s
guysbr i
nghim cl
othes.Wedi dntsleeponthesame
bed.Het ookthecouchcausehedi dn'
twanttosl
eep
i
nt heguestroom wherewe' l
lbesepar at
edbyawall.
"
Sbusi
so.
"
"
Whatdi
dIdo?
"
"
Not
hingbutcany
oubepat
ientwi
thme.
"
"Ihavebeenf
oray
earsomypat
ienceski
l
lsar
eon
steroi
ds.
"
"Forayearandt
hany oudeci
dedtojustwal
kint
omy
houseandstayoverwit
houtconsent
."
Heshr
ugsandl
i
ftmeupcausi
ngmet
oshr
iek.I
wr
apmylegsar
oundhi
swaist
.
"
Youneededme.
"
Hesi
tsont
hebedIcanf
eel
hismanhoodunderme.
"
You'
rebeaut
if
ul.
"
Ismi
l
eandhepul
l
smyheadcl
osert
ohi
swi
thhand
behindmyhead.Hebr eathsandpar t
shi slips.He
sucksonmyl owerl i
pandIf ollowhisleadsucki ng
hisupperli
p.Iuntangl
emyl egsaroundhi m put
them oneit
hersideofhi sthighs.Hegrabsmybut t
andlif
tsmeup.Ihav emyhandsonhi sbi cepsand
they'
refl
exi
ngundermypal ms.Het urnsusar ound
andpullsout.
"
We'
renotgoi
ngt
odoany
thi
ng.Okay
?"
Inodandhesmi
l
es.Hehel
psmeoutofmyT-
shi
rt
.
"
Fuck.
"
Her unshishandov ermybr east
sandsqueezes
them.Het rai
lswetki ssesfrom myneckandst ops
bymyboobski ssingt hem.Hesucksandl i
ckson
eachar eola.Hebl owsai ronmywetni pplesandI
squirm ast heyerect.Hepul l
sdownmyspandex
shorts.I'
m starknakedi nfr
ontofhim andbel ooks
l
ikehi sseeinggold.Hei sj
uststandingtherest ari
ng.
Itryclosi
ngmyl egsbuthehol dsthem apart.Hel i
es
betweent hem andput smylegsbetweenhi sar ms
andl ocksthem inandpul l
smecl osertohisf ace.
"
You'
resowet
."
Thev i
brat
ionfrom hi
m speakingsocl
osetomy
vagi
namakesmemoan.Hel et'
sgoofonelegand
putsitonhisshoulder
.Hepar tmyvagi
nall
ipsand
histhumbr ubsme.
"
Mmmmh.
",Imoan.
Hei nsert
sonefi
ngerandhi stonguecomesi nto
contactwithmyclitandIarchmybacksl ight
ly.I
'
ve
neverhadsomeone' stonguedownt hereneit
her
haveIf el
tli
ket
his.Hef i
ngerpumpsi nsi
deofme
whilehesucksandgr azesmycl i
t.Hemakesacome
heregesturewi
thhi sfi
ngerinsi
demeandIl i
ftmy
buttupbuthedoesn' tst
opsuckingonme.
"
Ozo!
"
Ishakeaswhatfeel
li
keaknotget sunti
edinmy
abdomen.Igobackdownbr eathi
ngheavil
yandmy
l
egsareshaki
ng.Het akesouthisfi
ngerandl
icksi
t
l
ookingatmeandImakeaf ace.
"
Yout
ast
egood.
"
Hetr
ieski
ssi
ngmebutIcov
ermyl
i
ps.Hel
aughs
andl
et'
smego.
"
Im comi
ng.
"
Hest andupandInot i
cet hebulgeinhispant s.I
sit
mov i
ng?Hecat chesmest ari
ngandlaughs.He
walkstot hebat hr oom andcomesbackwi that owel
andwi peme.Hegoesi ntothebathr
oom agai n.I
squeal i
ntomypi llow.Thatwassoamazi ng.Iwear
myT- shirtandf ixt hebed.Hi sbeengonef orawhi l
e
butIdontdi sturbhi m.Iheartheshowerr unningand
Iheaddownst airs.Itrycalli
ngUnyeziagainbuther
phoner i
ngsunanswer ed.Shesentmescr eenshots
i
nt hemor ni
ngandt hethingsthatwerewr it
tenthere
werepat heti
c.Thi siswhyIdon' thaveFacebook.I
putmyphoneawayandImakeussomesandwi ches.
55
UNYEZI
"
Ist
her
eel
ect
ri
cit
ydownher
e?"
"
YesUny
ezi
."
Il
ookatt hebeauti
fult
reeswepass.Thisplaceis
beauti
ful.We'regoingtoa'saf
ehouse'wherewewi l
l
bestayingt i
l
lallt
hisbl
owsov er.Nkosi
nathihas
beenasl eepthewholeway .Il
ookathim andhis
passedout .Asighescapesmyl ips.
"
He'
l
lbef
inebabe.
"
IlookatLangaandhesmil
es.Ihopehedoes.When
hef ai
ntedatt
hegym.Iwassoscared.Hej
ustlai
d
there.
"
Mama.
",Lami
.
"
YesLami
."
"
We'
rehungr
y."
"
Agai
n?"
"
Yesmama.
"
Igiv
et hem thecontai
nerwit
hpizzasli
ces.We've
beendr i
vingfor2hoursandweent er
edt hevi
ll
agea
fewmi nutesago.Nkanyezii
ssuckinghisthumband
hedoesn'twantt ogetovert
hathabit
.Hest ar
es
wideey edfil
ledwit
hcuri
osit
yandinnocenceatthe
passingtrees.
"
Sanel
eisy
ourhandokay
?"
"
YesAunt
ie.
"
"
Okayboy
."
Weappr oachav er
yt allwall
.Isi
tupstr ai
ghtas
Langadrivesinaft
ert heyopenthegat e.Therei
sa
bighousewi thacottageont heside.Wegetoutof
thecarandt heguardst akeourbags.
"
Apool
!"
,Lami
.
Theyf
istbumpwithSaneleandruntowar
dsi
t.
Nkany
ezifol
lowsaft
erthem t
ri
ppingher
eandther
e.
"
Stopr
unni
ng!
",
Ishoutaf
tert
hem.
Langacarr
iesNkosinat
hi i
ntot
hehouse.Iwatchhi
m
ashelayshim onwhatwi l
lbehisbed.Het
hrowsa
fl
eeceoverhim andstr
etcheshi
sarms.
"
Damnt
hatboyi
sheav
y."
Il
aughandhej
oinsme.Il
eavethedoorhalfcl
osed
andwalkt
owhatwil
lbeourbedroom.Isi
tonthe
bedandbumponit.
"
Whenar
etheot
her
sar
ri
vi
ng?
"
"Bhekikhay
asaidhe'
llar
ri
vesoon.Khulekani
is
delayedbytraf
fi
c.Thandowasthelasttogetont
he
road.
"
Inodandstandupunpackingmybag.Langal eaves
met ogocheckonthekids.Ipackourcl
othesinto
thesmall
closet
.Ifi
ndLangaout si
dewatchi
ngt he
kidssi
twit
hthei
rfeeti
nwat er.
"
Khuzway
o."
Hetur
nsaroundandl
ooksatme.Hehasagedsi
nce
t
hiswhol
edramastar
ter
.
"
Come.Ineedy
ourhel
p."
Henodsandfol
lowsmeaft
ertel
l
ingaguardtokeep
aneyeontheki
ds.Whenwegetint
oourroom It
ake
outabl
anket
.
"
Getont
hebed.
"
Hesitsontopofit
.It
akeouthi
sshoesandhel
phi
m
outofhisj
acket
.
"
Sleep.
"
Heobl
i
gesandIt
hrowt
hebl
anketov
erhi
m.
"
Sleep.I
'
llwakey
ouupwhenev
ery
onehasar
ri
ved.
"
Henodsandy awns.Iat
temptt
oleavebuthepul
ls
metohim andmakesmegeti nwit
hhim.Helayshis
bi
gheadonmyboobsandwest ayli
kethatt
il
lhe
sl
eeps.

NOXOLO
Iwakeupt opainsandfeel
i
ngdr owsy.Il
ookar ound
andI '
mi nar oom wit
hmachinesconnectedtome.I
trytakingthem outbutr
eal
iseonlymyr i
ghthand
works.ACaucasi anwomanwal ksinandhur r
ies
towar dsme.Icanonl ymovemyr i
ghtlegbutthe
otherf eel
sheavy.
"MrsKhuzway
oyou'
renott
omov
e.Letmehel
pyou
back.
"
Shehel
psmebackt
obedandput
sthebl
anketov
er
me.
"
Wher
eismyf
iancé?
"
"Hi
soutbuthesai
dIshoul
dcal
lhi
m wheny
ouwake
up.
"
"
Whoar
eyou?
"
"
I'
myourhi
redst
ayi
ndoct
or.I
'
m gl
ady
ou'
reawake.
"
Shest
art
swr
it
ingst
uffdownandexami
ningme.
"Yourr
ibsseem t
obeheal
i
ngwel
l
.Justr
efr
ainf
rom
harshmovement."
"
Whathappenedt
omyr
ib?
"
"
Ithadal
i
ttl
ecr
ack.Not
hingsev
erebutst
il
lpai
nful
."
Inodandshechangesthebandagesonmeand
l
eavespushi
ngthemachinesout.Il
aymyhead
comfor
tabl
yonthepil
lowandsigh.Shecomesback
andhandsmepainkil
ler
s.
"
MrKhuzway
owi
l
lbeher
ema'
am.
"
"
Wher
eismyson?
"
"
Hej
ustar
ri
ved.
"
"
Howi
she?
"
"Hehasabrokenar
m buthehasasl
i
ngonso
ever
ythi
ngi
sgoingwell
."
Inodandsheleav
es.Icl
osemyey
esast
hepi
l
ls
star
tworki
ng.

THANDO
Sbusi
soistheonedri
vi
ngmeandhekeepson
st
eali
ngglancesatme.
"
Ozo.
"
"
Mmmh?
"
"
Whati
sit
?"
"
Wit
hwhat
?"
"
Youkeepst
eal
i
nggl
ances.
"
"
It
'sj
ustt
haty
ou'
resobeaut
if
ul.
"
Ismi
l
eandhechuckl
es.
"
Yourdi
mpl
esmakey
oul
ookl
i
keababy
."
"
Idontl
ookl
i
keababy
."
"
Ofcour
sey
oudont
."
Webot henj oyeachot her
spr esencei
nsi l
ence.Heis
focusedont heroadnow.Af terminut
esofsi l
enceI
getbor edandIcl earmythroatandhedoesn' tlook
atme.Iam wear i
ngaleatherminiski
rtwi t
halong
sli
tinfront.Ili
ftitupabithigherandfakeacough.
Het akesashor tlef
tanddoesn'tpayattenti
ontome.
"
Hav
eyouseenmyhandbag?
"
"
It
satt
heback.
"
Ij
umpov ertheseatsrubbingmyassonhi sface.I
pret
endtolookformybag.Iopeni tandtakeoutmy
phoneandwi negums.Ijumpov ertheseat
smov i
ng
myassnearhi sface.Isi
tdownandopenmywi ne
gums.Helooksatmeandl aughs.
"
Whatdoy
ouwant
?"
"
Huh?
"
"
You'
vebeent
ryi
ngt
ogr
abmyat
tent
ion.Whatdo
y
ouwant?"
"
Not
hing.
"
Hepul
l
sov
eronamount
ainhi
l
landl
ooksatme.
"
Comeher
e."
Ij
umpovert
ohisseatandsi
tont
opofhi
m.He
moveshi
schai
rback.
"
Whati
sit
?"
"
SinceIwi
l
lbewi
thmyf
ami
l
y.Whenwi
l
lIseey
ou?
"
"
Forsomeonewhodidn'
twantany
t hingtodowi
th
meforayeary
ouseem tot
akealiking."
Isl
aphi
schestandhel
aughs.
"
Okaysor
ry.Iwoul
dvi
sitbuty
ourf
athermi
ghtki
l
l
me.
"
"
Oh.
"
"
Buty
ou'
l
lseeme.
"
Inodandsneakmyhandsunderhi
sT-
shi
rt
.
"
Yourhandsar
ecol
d."
"
War
m meup.
"
Hesmirksandkissesme.Heput
shishandsonmy
wai
standmov esundermerubbi
ngourgroi
ns
t
ogether.Hedi
rectsmyhandi
nsi
dehissweatsand
hel
psmet akeouthisthi
ckmanhood.Ir emember
hi
m say i
ngsomet hi
ngaboutbei ngNiger
ianaswell
.
Hedirectsmyhandupanddownhi sfir
m manhood.
Hestopshel pi
ngmeoutandhi shandsneaksinsi
de
mypant y.Herubsmycl i
tslowly.WhenI'm wet
enoughhemakesmest oprubbinghi
m andmakes
megr i
ndonhi minstead.Thisfeel
ssogood.
"
Fuckbabe!
"
Ishakewithpl
easur
easIcum andhegrabsmybutt
harderashecums.Ilaymyheadonhi
schestand
l
augh.
"Ican'
tbel
iev
eIj
ustdi
dthati
nthemi
ddl
eof
nowhere."
"
Thatwashott
hough.
"
"
Iwonderi
fsexi
sjustasgood.
"
"
You'
l
lfi
ndout
."
Hetakesoutat
issueandwi
peshimself
.It
akeout
wi
pesf r
om mybagandwipemyselfcl
ean.
"
Youf
ine?
"
Inodandopenmywi
ndow.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
Il
ookathi
m andhebl
owsaki
ssbef
oredr
ivi
ng.

AMANDA
UncleBhekikhayapar ksi nsi
det hebigbeaut i
fulyar
d.
Iam thefir
sttogetof fwi thSnei nmyar ms.Hi s
suchaf atbaby.Hei ssl eepi ngpeacefull
yinmy
armsandIcan' tgetov erhi scuteness.Wef ollow
UncleBhekikhayai ntot hehouseandhel eadsust o
ourrooms.Wedi dn'tseeany oneintheloungesoI
guesstheyhav en'tarrived.Aswepassadoori t
opensreveali
ngast i
llsl eepyNkosi nat
hi.
"Ahmshanaseni
khona.
"(Ohnephewy
'al
l
around.
),
Uncl
eBheki
.
Hegiv eshim hisr egularsidesmil
e.Hehaschanged
somuchi nay ear.Hi shairhasgrownandi scurly
andbeaut if
ul t
hatIwantt orunmyhandst hr
oughit.
Heev enhasgr ownoutagoatbear dandamust ache
makinghi ml ookmat ure.Hishei
ghthasn'tchanged
mucht houbuthi sphy siqueseemsf i
rmerandhis
shoul
der sarebr oader .Hestil
lhasthatonebracket
thati
swiderthantheotherbutinthoset
rackpant
s
hisbowlegsdon'tseem uneven.Il
ookathist
runk
andquickl
ylookaway .
"
Letmehol
dhi
m."
,hesay
snear
ingme.
Hisvoiceishoarsefr
om wakingupandan
i
nv ol
untar
yshivertr
avelsdownmyspine.Ihol
dout
thesleepi
ngbabyt ohi
m andhetakeshim outofmy
holdgentl
ymaki ngsurenottowakehi
m up.
"You'l
lchoosear
oom Amanda.Iwanttounpack
quickl
y.Putmyki
dbacktosleepaf
tercuddl
inghi
m."
,
SisiKuhle.
Inodanddr agmysui t
casethati snexttot hewall
andchooseanempt yroom nextt oNathis.Neutral
colourshasbeenusedandi tlooksspaci ous.Itakea
seatont hebedandt akeoutmysneaker ssighi
ng
ti
redly
.SnekeptmeandSi siupal lni
ght.Hisbeen
restl
essal otlat
elyasifhecanf eel t
hewei ghtwe
carryaround.Aloudcr yemitsfrom thenextr oom.I
dragmyt i
redasst oNathisr
oom.Hi str
y i
ngt oshush
theawakeSnebuti sfail
ingcausehi sshushingway
tooloudandi spacingwayt oof ast.
"
Letme.
"
Hehandshert omeandIav oi
dhisey es.IputSneon
mychestandpacear oundsoothi
ngly.Hiscri
es
subsideandhestar
tssnori
ngli
ghtly
.Asi ghofrel
ief
escapesmylips.
"
You'
dmakeagoodmom.
",Nkosi
nat
hi.
Il
ookathi
m andsmi
l
ewhi
l
eshr
uggi
ng.
"
Letmet
akehi
mtoSi
si.
",Iwhi
sper
.
HenodsandIexi thi
sroom andexhal
eassoonasI
stopbei
ngsurroundedbyhiscol
ogne.Hest
il
lhasn'
t
changedi
t.IknockonSisi
sroom andsheanswer.
"
Ent
er.Layhi
minhi
scotf
ormepl
ease.
"
Il
ayhim gentl
yandheholdsont
omyshi
rtwi
tht
hat
babygr
ip.Sisihel
psunt
ight
enhi
shol
dandIl
ayhi
m
down.
"
Thanksf
orhel
pingwi
thhi
m."
"Youstr
uggl
edal
onewhi
l
eIwasatschool.You'
ve
beentheref
ormeal
lmyli
fet
hisi
sthebestIcan
do."
Shesmi lesandkissesmycheekandIleaveher
room.Iheadt othekitchenandIf
indNathi
wipi
ng
vigorouslyathi
svest.Hecli
ckshi
stonguetaki
ngi
t
off.Ishuffl
eandleave.
"
Amanda.
"
Itur
nar
oundslowl
yandhisgazei
sint
ense.Igl
ance
atmyhandsandhenear
sme.
"
Whyar
ewesodi
stant
?"
Idon'tanswerbutshrugmyshoulder
si nst
eadand
hesighs.Wehearf ootst
epsappr
oachingandImov e
awayf rom hi
mtothef ri
dge.Her
emainsst andi
ng
ther
eshi r
tl
ess.
"
You'r
eupal
ready
?Howar
eyouf
eel
i
ngnow?
",Aunt
Uny
ezi.
"
I'
m okaymom.St
opwor
ryi
ngt
oomuch.
",
Nkosi
nathi
.
Heki
sseshi
smot her
sforeheadandsheembraces
hi
m.I
'venev
erseenhim soaffect
ionat
eandsoraw.
"
OhheyAmanda.You'
resogr
ownup.
",
AuntUny
ezi
.
Shel
eav
esNkosi
nat
hiandhugsmeexci
tedl
y.She
gr
absabot
tl
eofwaterandanappleandl
eav
es
l
eavi
ngmewithashi
rt
lessNkosi
nathi
.
"
Wantasandwi
ch?
"
"
Please.
"
Ismileandlayouttheingredi
ent
soutonthecounter
.
Icutoutthecrustandaddmor echeesewit
hout
polonyforhi
m.Islidehisplat
etohi
m andhesmiles.
"
Youst
il
lremember
?"
"
Alway
s."
Hetakesabi
teandgroans.Hesti
l
lappr
eci
atesf
ood.
Hechewssoelegant
lyandhisj
awli
nemove.He
swal
lows
"
It
'sbeenayearsincewel
astt
alked.I
'
vemi
ssed
y
ou.",
hesaysmil
ing.
"
Yeah.Al
othaschanged.
"
Isayl
ooki
ngathi
m upanddownandhechuckl
es.
"
Eish.I
'
vebeent
aki
ngcar
eofmy
sel
f.
"
"
Icansee.
"
"
Youchangedaswel l
.Yourassi
smor er
ounderand
f
ir
mer.Yourt
highs.Actual
l
yyouingener
al.
"
Hel
i
ckshi
sli
psandIl
aughpushi
nghi
m pl
ayf
ull
y.
"
Arey
ouokaynow?
"
Hel ooksatmeandhi sjawticks.Heshr
ugsandeat
s
hi
ssandwi ch.I
'l
ltakethatasano.Hestil
lhas
unresolvedissues.Ieatmyownsandwi chashis
auntwalksi n.
"
Zit
handwa.
"(Lov
es)
"
AuntThando.
",wegr
eetsi
mul
taneousl
y.
Shesmi l
esandwalkspastus.Shei
ssobeaut
if
ul
andreeksconf
idence.

TSHEGO
We' r
ei ntr
afficanditsmov ingveryslowly.We're
sitt
inginsilence.Iopenthewi ndowf orsomef r
esh
airandIwi pet hesweatof fmyf orehead.It
's
scor chi
nghotandwe' r
emov i
ngr eall
yslow.What
hadcausedt histraf
fi
c?Wecan' tev enseewi thye
l
ineofcar si nfrontofus.Iuncli
pmybr aandsl i
deit
offst
il
li
nmyT-shir
t.Khul
ekani
looksatmeand
shakeshi
shead.
"
What
?It
'shot
."
"
Theski
l
ly'
al
lwomenpossesst
odot
hati
npubl
i
c."
"
Ngey
eke.
"(Leav
emeal
one)
"
YousuchatZul
ukodwast
handwasami
."
Il
ovei
twenhespeakshishomel
anguage.I
tsl
i
kei
s
moremanl
yanddominant.
"
Ngey
azama.
"(I
'
mtr
ying.
)
"
Ngempel af
uthingiy
athandamowukhul
uma
i
siZul
u."(
ForrealandIlov
eitwhenyouspeakZul
u.)
"
Kao'
rat
a."
(Il
ovey
ou.
)
Helooksatmeandsmi
l
est
hatdashi
nggoof
ysmi
l
e
ofhi
s.
"
Nami
ngi
yakur
ata.
"(Il
ovey
out
oo.
)
Igi
ggl
eli
keateenagegir
landhesmi l
es.Itakea
bot
tl
eofwaterandgulpi
tdownev enifi
tisjotas
col
dasitwaswhenweboughtit.Thecarinf r
ontof
usmovesandwef ol
l
ow.Itcomest oahaltcausi
ng
Khulekanitohitt
hebrakesandIj er
kf orwardand
thanbackspill
ingthewateronmywhi teT-shi
rtand
myj eans.Isi
ghandt r
ywipingitofffail
ingmassivel
y.
Abr eezepassesandIshiveratthesensat i
onit
sendst hr
oughoutasthewetf abri
ccar essesmy
nipples.
"
Whati
sthi
sguydoi
ng?
!Ar
eyouoka-
"
Hi
seyestr
avelt
omyboobst hatar
evi
abl
ethr
ough
t
hewetshi
rtandli
ckshi
sli
ps.
"
Ispi
l
twat
eronmy
sel
f.
"
"Isee..
.er
hm..
.Bengabeasi
khol
angabe
ngiyabhebha.
"(I
fweweren'
ther
edI
'dbefucki
ngy
ou.
)
Idon'
twhathejustsai
dbutIknowi
tsnast
ybyt
he
useofthel
astword.
"
Takeof
fthatt
eeandtakemi
ne.You'
l
lst
ret
chi
twi
th
y
ourbi
gboobsthou.
"
Hemakesasulki
ngf
aceandIlaugh.Hepull
sitover
hi
sheadandhandsi
ttome.It
akeitandthankhim
andt
akeoffmi
ne.
"
You'
reki
l
li
ngmeher
eMaThengo.
"
"
Sor
ry?
"
"
Mxm.
"
Il
aughandputi
ton.
"
Wai
t.
"
Istoppulli
ngitdownandhest retchesovertomy
seatandgrabsmyboobsandki ssesthem than
pull
i
nghi st
eedownwi l
lmyt orso.Hesitsbackand
smilesandgetsbacktothesteeringwheel.Ismil
e
andlookoutthewindowaswemov esl
owlywiththe
tr
affic.

NDABENKHULU
Igotacallf
rom thedoctorthatNooloisupanhour
agoandIjustparkedoutsidethehouse.Iwal ki
n
andthegirl
sareandt heli
ttl
eonesar esitt
ing
chatt
ingandlaughinginthelounge.Igreetand
Sanelehugsme.Ihughi m back.
"
You'
reokay
?"
"
YesDad.
"
If
eel
ever
yonesey
esonusandIst
andup.
"
Yourmom i
sup.Let
'sgocheckonher
."
Ev
ery
onest
andsup.
"
What
?When?
",Kuhl
ekonke.
"
Canweseeher
?",
Uny
ezi
.
"
Issheal
ri
ght
?",
Thando.
"
Ohmygosh!
",
Amanda.
"I
'
llgocheckonherandi
fshesal
ri
ghtt
hany
'al
lcan
seeher.
"
Theynodandsitdownsti
llbuzzedandexci t
edyet
worri
ed.MeandSaneleheadtoherr oom andevery
stepItakef
eel
sheavyandloud.Myhear tisbeat
ing
outofmychestasItur
nthedoor knobwithsweaty
hands.
"
Opent
hedoorBaba.
"
Il
ookatSanel
eandhenodst
owardst
hedoor
.I
openitsl
owl
yandwearemetbyt
hedoct
orpacki
ng
herbag.
"
MrKhuzway
oandson.
",
shesmi
l
esatus.
Inodatherandl
ookbehi
ndherbutt
hebedi
sempt
y.
Shenoti
cesmygaze.
"
MrsKhuzway
oisi
nthet
oil
et.
"
"
Isshef
ine?
",Sanel
e.
"Yes.Shehast otakehermedi cat
ion.Av oi
dany
drasti
cmov ement.Shehasapr oblem withwalki
ng
duet otheinjur
yonhert hi
ghbutot herthanthat
she'l
lbef i
ne.Hersli
ngi sadjustedandherr ibswil
l
healasl ongasshedr inksherpill
s.Makesur et
ocall
mei fy'
allneedany t
hing."
"
Thanky
ouKat
her
ine.
"
"
Pleasur
eBoss.
"
Sheleavesandthebathr
oom dooropensreveal
ing
mylimpingwifewit
hacrutchinherhand.Iqui
ckly
runovertohertohel
pherout.Ihel
phersitdown
andlayonthebed.
"
You'
recomf
ort
abl
e?"
ShenodsandsmilesatSanele.Her ubstoherand
hugsheronhergoodsidewithhisgoodsi de.They
can'
tevengi
veeachothertheirbearhugs.Thisisal
l
myf
aul
t.Ishoul
d'
veuppedt
hei
rsecur
it
y.
SHORTSOMETHI
NG
(
I'
ll
seey
'al
ltomor
row.
)
NARRATED
Ev ery
onehadwokenupandset t
ledont het able.
Ther ewaschat t
erandt hesoundofut ensils.They
swal l
owedt hedivinebr eakfastcour tesyoft he
youngchef .Kuhlekonkepr oudofhersi stershe
kissedhercheekwhenshebentnearhert ot ake
l
ittleSinenhl anhl
af rom her .Nkosi nathi'sgazer ested
uponAmandaasshehel dt hey oungchi ldinher
armswhi l
esheor der edt hey oungboy swhosatona
tablef orkidst oeat .Hecoul dn'thelpbutwonderi f
shewoul d'v egottenpr egnanthadhenotgi venher
thatmor ningaf t
erpi l
l.She'dmakeagr eatmot her
.
Amandast eal
sagl anceatNkosi nathi asheshakes
hisheadl ightl
ytry i
ngt oclearawayhi sstray
thought s.Hehadl ostt hef emi ninel ookt hatshe
l
ov edandhel ookedmascul ineandnot18.Hi s
shoul dersmor ebr oadandhi saur amor e
i
nt imidating.HemaynotbeaKhuzway obybl ood
buthei soneoft hem.Herhear ttugsather
hy pothalamuspl ayingwi thheremot ions.Theycoul d
neverbe.Shel ookedar oundthet ableashernew
familypri
ortohersi sterandhernewl ov eandshe
smiled.Hersmi lefadedassher eal
isedt hat
Nkosinathiwasf amilynow.Shequi cklylookedaway
asast raytearescapedheral readymoi steyesand
sheescapedt heroom fullofl
aught erunnot icedwith
hernephewi nherar ms.Backi nthedi nningr oom
thefami l
ylaughedandwonder edwhohadt heir
fat
herboughtandwer eeagert omeether .I
nt he
cott
ageawomanpacedar oundcausi ngt hecr yst
als
onherneckt oratt
le.
"
Dearst
opwor
ryi
ng.
"
Shegotst artl
edbyt hef amil
iarvoiceofherloverand
shewi pedhersweat yhandsonhert i
ghtfadedbl ue
j
eans.Shecal l
edthoseherl uckyjeanssher eceived
fr
om hersi sterwhohadpassedon.Shewor ethese
verysamej eanswhenshemett heloveofherlife.
Het ookherhandsi nhi sandki ssedthem li
ghtl
y .She
wasanxi ousandhert houghtskeptonget ti
ngt he
bestofher .Shewasj usta27y earolddoctorwho
wasdat ingamant wiceherage.Soci etywasn'twhat
shewor riedaboutbutt hepeopl eacrossthei
r
cottagecouldacceptorcastherout.Shewasa
spiri
tualper
sonandhadt hespir
itofanoldsouland
thatisthereasonbehi
ndherhistoryofdati
ngpeopl
e
olderthanherbutneverasoldasherl ov
er.
"
Khuzway
owhati
fyourchi
l
drendon'
tl
ikeme?
"
Themanwhoagedl ikef
inewi
nesmiledr
eveali
ng
hi
sdimplesandpeckedherbr
uisedl
i
psthatshehad
beenbi
ti
ngallmorni
ng.
"
Trustme.They
'l
ll
ovey
ou.
"
Hest retcheshisv einybighandt owar dsherandshe
puthersmal lhandandhewr appedhi st hi
ckrough
yetsof tfi
ngersar ounditandmadeherst andup.He
fi
xedhercr y
stal andkissedherpassi onat ely
arousinghercausi ngasof tmoanofdesi r
eto
escapehercapt uredlips.Theypul lapartandshe
l
ooksathi m.Hel ookedmor egor geousandf itthan
allthemenshe' sbeenwi th.Hisf aci
al expression
remainedst oicbuthi seyeswer et enderandcar ing.
Shehel dont ohisf rameandhewr appedhi s
muscul ararmsar oundhersni ff
ingherv ani
ll
aand
l
av enderscentf rom herscent edst i
cksshebur ntall
thet ime.Hecl osedhi sey esandi nhaledt han
exhal ed.Hehadt houghthewasunabl et olov eafter
hiswi f
ehaddi ed.Whenhemetherasshehel peda
youngmanwhohadbeenhi tbyacarbr eakinghi s
l
eg.Hef eltliket her ewasamagnet i
cf orcepul l
ing
them t oget herandhel ikedhowhi shear trate
quickenedasshel ookedathi m ashel iftedt he
i
njur edy oungmani nhi sar mshel pinghi mi nt ohis
car.Sher odewi tht hem t oherpr acticewher eshe
hadexami nedt hey oungst r
angerandhadt hanked
him.Assoonast hei rhandst ouchedheknewhe
wasgoi ngt omakeherhi s.Hehadgot tenasecond
chanceatl ov eandheappr eciatedi tever yday .They
wal kedoutoft heircot tageandev er
yst ept he
womant ookf el theav yanddel ayed.Herhear tfeltas
i
fshe' l
lpukei t.Hercr ystalssuddenl ybecameheav y
andt hecl atteri tmadeast heyhi tanot herwas
maki ngherdi zzy .Shecoul df eelherar mpi t
sst i
ngas
herner veswer ehay wi
re.Hert hi
ckaf r
omat t
edt o
herf aceasshesweat ed.Whent hedoorwasopened
andshest oodi nf rontofat ablef ullofbeaut i
ful
stranger s.Shef eltaheav yl oadofener giessur ge
throughher .Happi nessov erpower edmostbutone
caughtheroffguar d.Fear
.Shel ookedatt
hey oung
manwhoat ewi thoutconver
singwi t
htheothers.A
younggirl
ent eredwi t
hababyi nherarmsandbyt he
rednessandpuf f
inessofhereyesshehadbeen
cryi
ng.Thetwoy oungster
sshar edalookandthe
l
ov ewassoi ntenseshegotaheadache.
"
Sani
bonani
."(
Hel
l
o.)
Sheremov edhergazefr
om thetwothatlov
edeach
otherbutuncer
tai
ntyandfearhel
dthem back.Aren'
t
theyfamil
y?Butthei
rlov
ewassopur e,shethought
Thecl
att
erquiet
eneddownt
het
abl
easev
ery
one
l
ookedatthem.
"Nal
edyPhosa?Khari
shma?
",Uny
ezi
excl
aimed
happi
lyandshocked.
Thenoi
sestar
tedastheyallst
artedaskingherwho
shewasandhowsheknowsher .Theladystoodst
il
l
conf
usedastohowthey oungladyknewher .
Somethi
ngshor
tfory
'al
l
.I'
m sol
azyi
tsnotev
en
funny
.

56
UNYEZI
"
She'saseer.Nudi
st.Shegivesdream
i
nter
pretat
ionsonl
i
neandconsul t
sonlinetoo.She'
s
adoctorst
udyingf
il
m producti
on.Omg! "
Iwasv eryecst aticofmeet i
ng' GogoKhar ishma' as
she'sknownt hatIonl yr
ealizedshe'sMkhul us
gir
lfri
endwhent heymov edt owardsthet able.She
hadpost edabouther52y earol dboyfri
endbutI
nevert houghti t'
dbesomeoneIknewl etal onemy
fat
heri nl aw.Weal lkeptquietandl ookedatt he
couple.Sur prisinglytheylookedgoodt ogether.
Mkhul uwasn' tyourty pi
caloldmanwi thabel lyand
wrinkledf ace.Hewasact uallyhandsomel yoldwi t
h
agr eatphy sique.Hehashi sar m aroundhersmal l
waist.Mkhul uopensherchai r
.
"
Thanky
ou.
",herv
oicei
ssosmoot
h.
Mkhulutakeshisseatandshedi
shesupforhi
m.
Langaleanstowardsmeandwhispers.
"
Poorme.Ihav
etodi
shupf
ormy
sel
f.
"
Iki
ckhi
m undert
hetabl
eandhegr
unts.Noonehas
sai
dawordandit'
sstar
ti
ngt
ogetawkward.
"Ohsoyout heonet hatwasmoani
ngatDad'
s
house.
",Khulekani
.
Weallfacepalm andTshegoslapshishead.
Khul
ekanisaysthemostdumbestshi tsomet i
mes.
MkhuluthrowsKhulekaniwhi
l
eNal edylaughs.At
l
eastshefounditfunny.
"
Kidst
hisi
sNaledyKhar
ishmaPhosa.She'
stheone
whohasbeenkeepi
ngmebusy."
"
HiNal
edy
/Hey
/You'
rebeaut
if
ul.
",wegr
eet
.
"
Sodowecal
lhermom?
",Khul
ekani
.
Herecei
vesaheadsl
apf
rom Bheki
khay
athi
sti
me
ar
ound.
"
Khul
ekani
thul
a."
,Ndabenkhul
u.
Khul
ekani
gest
uresazi
pov
erhi
smout
handt
hrows
awayt
hekey
.Tshegoshakesherhead.
"Si
yaj
abul
aukukwaziSi
si.Ngi
cel
aukubhuza
uneminy
akaemingaphi
?"(Wehappyt oknowy
ou.
CanIaskhowoldareyou?),
Ndabenkhul
u.
"
27.
",Nal
edy
.
Khul
ekani
chokesonhi
sjui
ceandcoughs.
"
What
?",
Khul
ekani
.
"
I'
m 27y
ear
sol
d."
,Nal
edy
.
Sher emovesherafrooutofherf aceandbli
nks.She
i
smor ebeauti
fuli
nr eal
li
fe.Herbirt
hmarkthatfi
l
ls
halfofherfaceisshapedliketheAfri
canconti
nent.I
feelsostarstr
uckrightnow.
"
Likey
ou'
re27?2and7?
",Khul
ekani
.
Hi
smaki
ngherabi
tuncomf
ort
abl
e.
"
Yes.
"
"
Wow.
"
Ndabenkhulustandsupandwalksout.Hi
sbr
other
s
fol
l
owhi m andThandofoll
owsthem when
Khulekani
toucheshershoul
derwhenhepassesher.
Mkhul
utri
esst
andingupbutsheput
sherhandon
hi
sshaki
ngherhead.Nowthi
sisawkwar
d.
"
Arey
ouTswana?
",Noxol
o.
"
No.I
'
m Pedi
andI
ndi
an.
",
Nal
edy
.
"
YourZul
uissof
ine.
",Tshego.
"
I'
vebeeni
nKZNf
orawhi
l
e."
,Nal
edy
.
"
Ican'
tbel
i
eveI
'
m meet
ingy
oui
nreal
."
,Isay
.
Shesmilesandmakesey
econt
actandcl
osesher
eyest
ightl
y.
"
Whyar
eyousoangr
y?"
,Nal
edy
.
Herquest i
oncatchesmeof fguar
dandIstutterf
ora
while.ShereachesformyhandandIquicklypull
it
back.Istandupandpi ckupmyplateandleave.I
holdontothesinkandexhale.
"
I'
m sor
ryImadey
ouuncomf
ort
abl
e."
Ij
umpatt hesoundofhervoi
ceandt
urnaround.
Sheisstandi
nginthedoor
wayandshehasher
handsinherpockets.
"
Yoursoul
isr
est
less.You'
reangr
y.You'
vegot
tenso
goodatf akinghappi nessthatyou'restarti
ngt o
believeit.Youhav eunanswer edquest i
ons.You' ve
turnedy ourbackony ourancestors.You'vestopped
pray i
ng.You' r
eangr yatGod.Yourhear tsti
llbleeds
from thel ossofy ourchild.Yourtrustiswav eri
ng
afteryourhusbandcheat ed.Youst i
lldream ofy our
rapeencount er.Youmayhi deitwellfrom othersbut
yourspiritisaskingf orhelp.Pray.Cry.Forgive.
Forgivey ourselfforholdingyourselfbackwi th
hatredandanger .
"
Shewalksoutl eavi
ngmewi t
hat humpi ngheartand
i
ntears.Iwalkt omytemporarybedroom andas
soonasIcloset hedoorIsl
i
dedownt hedoor.Ilay
myheadonmyknees.Thef i
rstsobescapesmy
qui
ver
inglips.Iclosemyeyesast hefl
ashbacksof
whenIlostmydaught ercomesback.I tsti
l
lhaunts
me.
"
Shedi
dn'
tmakei
t.
"
Ihol
dmyt
ummyasIf
eel
li
kemywombi
sagape.
"
You'
l
lal
way
sbemysl
ut!
"
Ihol
dmyst
omacht
ight
erasi
tfeel
sli
keIcanf
eel
t
hem f
orci
ngt
hemsel
vesi
nme.
"
Isawt
hem ki
ssi
ngatt
hegar
age.Hi
scheat
ing.
"
IchokeasobandIlayont hecol
dti
l
edf l
oor.Tear
s
str
eam downfr
eel
ywet ti
ngmycheeksandIwi pe
snotfr
om mynose.Ifeelt
hedoorbeingpushed.
"
Uny
ezi
."
Langasv
oicemakesmecr
ylouder
.
"
Arey
ouokay
?"
"
Goaway
!"
"
I'
m goi
ngt
oopent
hedoorsl
owl
y.
"
Hepushesi
tpushingmealongwithi
t.Hepeepsand
seesmelay
ingthereandhekneel
sdownnexttome.
"
What
'swr
ong?I
'
m sor
ryi
fIdi
dsomet
hing.
"
Helif
tsmei nt ohi
sar msandIwantt opuke.Whati
f
heheldherlikethis?Whati fhehel
dhesocl oset
o
hi
m?Icr yhar derpushinghim away
.Heholdsme
ti
ghtregar
dlesst i
llIgetti
redandcryi
nhisarms.
"
Ihat
eyou.
"
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
Hei
sjustapol
ogi
zi
ngandhedoesn'
tknowf
orwhat
!
I
mbeci
le!
"
Ihat
eyou!Iwi
shy
oucoul
dvani
sh!
"
"
Iknow.Il
ovey
out
oo.
"
Hel aysmyheadonhischestandcuddlesme.Why
didmom havetoabandonme?Iwoul dn'thav
ebeen
raped!Iwoul
d'
veknewaboutmyr ootsandgift
earl
ierandwoul
d'
veneverlostmychil
d.

NDABENKHULU
"
It
'sbl
asphemy
!",
Ishout
.
"Idon'tgetwhyy ou'
resopissedoff?I'
venev erseen
Dadsohappyaf t
ermom' sdeat
h.Hewasnev erthe
same.Ev ersinceshecamei ntohisli
feI'
vebeen
seeingadi f
ference.Hesmilesmore.Heck!Heev en
callsandchecksuponus!Dadst oppeddoi ngt hat
whenMom di ed!Hisfocuswasoursaf etyand
financial
st ate.Hethrewmoneyourway !Hewor ked
hisassof ftogetushere.Hekill
ed!Hemani pulated.
Hetookthebl
ame.Justsowecangr
owupandhav e
somethi
ngtostandon.St
opbei
ngj
udgement
al.
",
Khul
ekani.
"Bafo.I'm withKhulekani onthisone.Mysonwho' s
18sl eptwi tha25y earol dwomanandmanymi ght
j
udgeandcal li
ttaboobuthi s18andheknowswhat
hisdoi ng.Ifhewas15Iwoul d'veopenedacase
againstt hewomanev ent houghhei nit
iat
edit.I
fI
hadj udgedhi m andcastast oneathim asifIwas
i
nnocentt hanI'
dbeahy pocri
te.Ihaveasonwho
thi
nkssexheal semot ionalpainandI '
m deali
ngwith
thatrightnow.Ican' tbewor ryingaboutDadandhis
rel
ationship.Thatwomani soldenought oknow
what '
sshe' sdoing.Iftheyloveeachot herthanIam
notgoi ngt obestandingi ntheirway."
,Langa.
Hest
andsupandl
eav
esus.
"
Dadi
s52.She'
s27.Can'
ty'
al
lseeany
thi
ngwr
ong
wi
tht
hat
?!"
"WedoBaf o.It
snoneofourbusinessthou.I
t
doesn'tsi
twellwi
thmeei t
herbuti
ftherelat
ionshi
p
i
spur ethanI'
m notagai
nstit
.Daddeservestobe
happy
.",
Bheki
khay
a.
"She'
s27bafo.I
tsgoi
ngt
oseem l
i
keBabai
sa
paedophi
l
e."
"I
'm dati
nga30y earol
dmanwhi leI'm 21.Idon'tsee
theagegapwhenI '
m wi
thhim.Her espectsme.
May bethat
'sallshe'sl
ooki
ngf or.Respectand
someonewi se.Someoneol derwhoknowswher e
theystandi
nl i
fe.Youhavetof indtheper sonthat
shotyourwifeandst opsti
ckingy ournosewher eit
's
notneeded.FocusonNoxol oandSanel e.
",Thando.
Shestandsupf uri
ouslyandexit
sbangi ngthedoor.
Weal l
sitsi
lence.I
tlookssowr ong.Whati fshe'
sa
golddigger
?Justlookingforaneasymeal ti
cket.I
rubmyf aceandsigh.She'sadoct orsoIguessher
beingagolddiggerwillwai
t.Khulekanibustsin
l
aughter.Bheki
khayafacepalmsandshakeshi s
head.
"
Usi
nekani
?"(
whatar
eyoul
aughi
ngat
?)
"
HehNkosi
sleptwi
tha27y
earol
d!"
,Khul
ekani
.
"
That
'snotf
unny
.",
Bheki
khay
a
"
IknowbutIcan'
tbel
i
evehowt
hatki
dtookaf
ter
y
ou."
,Khul
ekani
.
Bheki
khayaclickshistongueandslapshisheadon
hi
swayout .Khulekaniisanidi
ot.Bheki
khayadi
d
haveathi
ngf orolderwomenwhenhewasi n
uni
ver
sity
.
"
Letmegof
ini
shbr
eakf
ast
."
Ist
andupandKhul
ekani
fol
l
ows.Heput
shi
shand
onmyshoul
der
.
"Mom i
sproudofBabaar eshei
s.Hegav
elov
e
anot
herchance.
",Khul
ekani
.
Heleavesmestandi
nghere.Maybeshewasthe
l
ightattheendoft
hetunnelf
orDad.Maybe.

NOXOLO
Khul
ekani
,Bheki
khay
aandNdabenkhul
uwal
ked
backi
nandtookthei
rseat
s.
"
Doy
'al
lpl
anonmar
ryi
ng?
",Ndabenkhul
u.
Thet
wol
over
slookedateachot
herandbot
h
nodded.Ndabenkhul
uranhi
shandov
erhi
shead
andsighedl
oudly.
"WhathappenedDad?Doy our
eali
zet
heef
fectt
his
coul
dhav eonourprofil
e?You'
l
llookl
i
kea
paedophi
le.
",Ndabenkhulu.
"
I'
m 27andIam rat
ional
.Iam notfor
cedtobewit
h
y
ourfat
her.Il
ovehi
m andhelov esme."
,Nal
edy.
"Ndodana.Idon'tcareaboutprof
il
e.Thisisformy
happiness.Ithoughtyou'
dbehappyf ormeasmy
sonandmay bemyhappi nesswouldcomef i
rstt
o
youasi ti
tdoest ome.IloveNaledyandifmyel der
sonwon' tsupportmyr el
ati
onshi
pthanI'm sadto
saythaty ou'
dratherdi
sownme. ",
Khuzway o.
Hestoodupabr
uptl
ycausinghi
schairt
ofal
lonthe
gr
ound.Heexi
tsandleav
esussitt
ingwit
htensi
on.
"
You'll
neverseeanyotherwomanenoughf ory our
f
atherexceptyourmotherandnotonl yar
ey ou
makinghim unhappybutyourmotheraswel l.You
t
hinkshe'stheonlywomanf i
tforyourfat
her.This
maysoundi nsensi
ti
vebutsoar eyou.Yourmot her
wi
llneverwakeup.Stopholdingontoher.Shei s
dead.Letherr
est.St
opi
magi
ningy
ourf
atherwi
tha
ghost.
",Nal
edy.
Shestoodupandlef
tfol
l
owingherman.Ishookmy
headasbri
ghtsuneyesmetmine.
"
You'
rebeingself
ish.Youfal
lundersociet
yandthei
r
v
iews.Theleastyoucoulddoissupportyourf
ather
."
Hef
rownedatmywor
ds.
"Mymot hermustbet
urni
ngi
nhergr
ave.
",hesay
s
pissed.
"
IfIhadasonact
ingl
i
key
ouIwoul
dtoo.
"
Khulekanicl
ear edhisthroatandTshegoputher
handov erhismout h.Henodsatherandshel et'
sgo
ofhismout hslowl y
.Itrystandingupbutmycl ut
ch
sl
ipsandIf allonmybr okenar m whenIt r
y
balanci
ngmy selfwit
hitforgett
ingit
sinactive.Acry
ofpainescapedmyl ipsaspai nshootsthroughmy
arm.
"
Fuck!Babe!
"
Ndabenkhul
uisqui
ckt opi
ckmeupbr i
dal
styl
e.
Ever
yoneisonthei
rfeetandSanel
ecomesrunni
ng
i
nfol
l
owedbyLami
,
AmandaandNkosi
nat
hi.
"
Mama!
",Sanel
e.
Hepicksupmycr ut
chandfol
lowsbehind
Ndabenkhul
uashecarri
esmet oourroom.Icry
l
oudlyastheint
ensepai
nfeel
slikeIsnappedmy
ar
mi nhalf
.

NKOSI
NATHI
Afteruncl
eNdabenkhuludisappearswi
thauntand
saneleweal l
lookateachother.Mkhul
uandhis
gir
lfr
iendarenotaroundandsoi sDadandMom and
auntThando.AuntTshegost andsupwithuncl
e
Khulekaniandtheyleav
easwel l.
"Thanky ouf
ort
hedel
i
ciousbr
eakf
astAmanda.
",
Bhekikhaya.
Hepatsherbef oreleavi
ngsighingashegoes.Aunt
Kuhleshrugsandf oll
owshim.Lami looksatusand
webot hshrug.Thistookawr ongtur
nqui ckl
y.What
happenedev en?Iwalktomyr oom andl i
stentomy
music.Ididn'
tgetmuchsl eeplastni
ght.Ihad
anothernight
mar eandknowi ngAmandawasj ust
nextdooralsof r
ustrat
edme.Iendedupgoi ngfora
swimt i
llmybodygr ewt i
red.Ifeel
myeyesdroop
butopent hem whenIheart hedooropen.Ir
aisemy
headaswhoev eropenedi tl
ocksit
.Myeyesmeet
AmandaandIt ir
edlysitup.Shegetsi
nbednextto
me.
"
Hey
."
"
Manda?
"
"Isawhowt i
redyouweretodayandIheardyou
groanyest
erdayandIwantedtowakey ouupwhenI
sawy oucr
yinginyoursl
eepbutIgrewscaredand
l
ef t
."
"
Thatst
il
ldoesn'
texpl
ainwhaty
ou'
redoi
ngi
nmy
r
oom."
Shelooksdownandpl
ayswi
thmysheet
s.She'
s
beauti
ful
.
"It
hought.
.."
,shecl
ear
shert
hroatnotf
ini
shi
ngher
sentence.
"
Yout
houghtwhat
?"
"
May
bewecant
akeanapt
oget
her
."
Ichuckl
eathershy
ness.Wher
eisthegir
lthat
l
iter
all
yfor
cedmetotakehervi
rgi
nit
y?
"
Youwannacuddl
e?"
"
Yes.Imissedfal
l
ingasl
eepi
nyourar
msandIknow
i
tswrongbut-
"
"
Whydoy
ousayi
tswr
ong?
"
"
We'
ref
ami
l
y.I
'
mli
key
oursi
ster
."
"
Udaki
we.DoIl
ookli
keI'
dsmashmysist
er?Sof
ede
t
hisi
swhyyouendeduscausey
out
hinkwe'r
e
f
amil
y?"
"
Butwear
e."
"
Onwhatt
erms?
"
"
Mysi
steri
smar
ryi
ngy
ouruncl
e."
"
Wai
tsowher
edowef
iti
n,
int
hisf
ami
l
yequat
ionof
y
our
s?"
"
You'
reKhuzway
o.Mysi
sterwi
l
lsoonbeone.
"
Ichuckl
eandshakemyhead.
"Ist
il
ldontgetyourpoi
nt.I
'v
eneverseenyouasmy
sist
er.Heckthat
sjustsi
ck.Isi
twhyyoutoldmeto
stayaway?"
"
Par
ti
all
y.
"
"
Whyv
ele?
"
"Youdidn'
tseemywor th.Youtreat
edmeasasperm
dish.Il
oveyouNathiandIreall
ydobutyouj
ust
couldn'
ttr
eatmerightplusyou'
realway
ssoangr
y
andIgotscaredsometimes."
"I
'
m sorr
y.I
'm notgoodatthi
slovething.Il
ov eyou
andwouldneverlayahandony ou.Youirri
tateme
someti
mesandwef oughtal
otbuthav eIev ermade
amov etohi
ty ou?"
Sheshakesherhead.
"
Usey
ourwor
ds.
"
"
No.
"
"
Whatdi
dIdo?
"
Shel
ooksatmewitheyeswide.Sheopensher
mout
handclosesi
tagain.
"
Whatdi
dIdot
oyouaf
terwef
oughtandy
oupi
ssed
meof
f?"
"
You.
..Youwoul
dpuni
shme.
",
shebr
eat
hesout
.
"
Howwoul
dIpuni
shy
ou?
"
Herbr
eat
heescal
atesandshecr
ossesherl
egs.
"
You'
dram i
ntome.You'
dsmackmyt
it
s."
"
Whatel
se?
"
It
hinkI
'
m get
ti
ngahar
donr
ightnow.
"You'ddenymeanor
gasm andmakemebegwhi
l
eI
apologi
zed."
Icanseeherer
ectnippl
est
hroughhert
ightt
opand
mymembert wi
tches.
"
Aft
er?
"
"You'dgi
vemeorgasm af
terorgasm t
il
lIcr
iedi
n
pleasur
eandcoul
dn'tt
akeitanymore.
"
Il
aybackont hebedandhereyestravelt
omyt r
unk
andnoticesmyer ect
ion.I
tshar
dnott onoti
cewi t
h
precum stai
ningmygr eysweat
pants.Shequickl
y
l
ooksawayandshuf fl
estoherfeet
.
"
Wher
ear
eyougoi
ng?
"
"
Tomyr
oom.
"
"Wozal
a.Utheuzosgi
dlanaminj
e."(
Comeher
e.You
sai
dyou'
resleepi
ngwit
hme. )
"
Whati
ftheycat
chus?
"
"
Theywont
."
Shetakesoffhershoesandget sinnexttome.Ipul
l
hercl
osertomeandl ayherheadonmychest .Igr
ab
herasswit
hmyot herhandandshesnuggl esi
nto
me.I'
m sofuckinghornyrightnowbutIjustwantt
o
hol
dhernothingmor e.
"
Tji
napot
ra.
"(
gir
lf
ri
end)
"
Huh?
"
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
"
What
'st
ji
napot
ra?
"
"
It
syournewname.
"
"
Hay
i.Don'
tcal
lmet
hat
."
"
Tji
napot
ra.
"
Shedr
agsmet
hroughhert
eet
handIchuckl
e.
"
Nat
hi.
"
"
Tji
napot
ra.
"
"
Whydonty
oul
augh?
"
"
Ido.
"
"
Noy
oudon'
t.Youchuckl
eforl
i
ke10seconds.
"
"
That
'smel
aughi
ng.
"
"
You'
rewei
rd.
"
Ishrugandsqueezeherass.I
m goi
ngt owakeup
withbluebal
l
sIthinkwhenIyawnsleepil
yandcl
ose
myey es.

NALEDY
Khuzwayoisangr
yandIhavenev
erseenhi
mthis
angry
.Ist
raddl
ehim andwr
apmyarmsaroundhi
s
neck.
"
Mlungi
si.
"
Helooksupatmewit
hredeyes.Thevei
nspopping
onhisheadmakeshi
mlookevenmorehot.Idon'
t
car
ewhatanyonesay
sbutthi
smani shandsome.
"
Cal
m down.He'
l
lcomear
ound.
"
IhopebecauseIcan'
tcompet
ewi
thadeadwoman.
"
Ithoughthe'
dtakei
tbett
ert
hant
heot
her
ssi
ncehi
s
t
heunderstandi
ngone.
"
"
Hef eel
sli
kehe'
dbebetr
ayi
nghi
smom i
fhel
etour
r
elat
ionshi
pcont
inue.
"
HesighsandIgr abhi sf acebetweenmyhandsand
ki
sshi mt enderl
y.Itturnsi ntoahungr yandl ustf
ul
ki
ssasourt onguesdancei nangerrubbingagai nst
eachot heraswebot ht asteeachot her.Hel i
ftsme
upandt urnsusar oundswi f
tl
y.Twol oudthudsar e
heardasheki cksof fhisshoes.Hehel psmeoutof
myT- shirtanduncl ipsmybr aexper
tly.Hef ondles
wit
hmyboobst wistingandpi nchi
ngmyni pples.I
hel
phi m outofhi sT- shi rtandmywar m palms
automat icall
ygoest ohisabsupt ohishar df i
rm
chest.Thedampnessi nmyunder wearr emindsme
ofhowheal waysar ousesmeandcanal way s
sati
sfiesme.Het ugsatmyj eansandpullsdownthe
materialbetweenhim andhisfor
biddenfrui
twhich
helovesanddev ourssomuch.Het akeshisj
eans
offandcl i
mbsont opofme, get
ti
ngi nbet
weenmy
shakingthighs.I
'
mr eall
yarousedthatwhenhe
att
empt stogodownonmeIpul lhim up.
"
Makel
ovet
ome.
",Icommandhi
m.
Hesmi lesatt hi
sandrubshist hi
cklongcockonmy
wetpussycausi ngmet omoanl owly.Hesli
des
himselfinmesmoot hl
yandIgasp.Hi sgi
rt
hf i
l
lsme
uptouchi ngplacesonlyhecanr each.Hemov es
slowlywhi l
eholdingti
ghtl
ytome.Wemov einsync
toourf ami l
i
ardanceoflovers.Hisgroanslowinmy
earsfalli
ngi nsyncwit
hmymoans.Wehol deach
otherti
ght erasweengagei nthislovemaking
session.Iclosemyey esbiti
ngmyl i
pashemakes
slowlov etome.
57
UNYEZI
Isi
tupandr ubmyey es.I
tsmidnightandLangais
nothere.Wespentthedayjustcuddli
ngandme
cry
ing.Apapercatchesmyat t
enti
on.Bytheugly
wri
tingIcantel
li
tsLangas.
"Baby.I
'm sor
ryt
ol eavel
i
kethisbutwefoundal
ead.
Iloveyouandwe'l
l tal
kwhenIgetbackhome.We
i
ncreasedsecuri
ty.Keepever
yonesafe.
"
Isighandst andup.It akeoutmygunandcountt he
bullet
s.Ihav eonl y9left.Ileavet hecasset t
eont he
bedandcocki tthanputi tonaut omat icmode.Ipul l
thet r
iggerandi tshoot sblankmul ti
pletimes.A
thoughtcomesi ntomind.Ishoul d'
veblownoutt hat
l
itt
lehoesbr ainsoutthemi nuteIf oundoutshesl ept
withmyhusbandandshott hatcheating
mot herfuckerinhi sknee.Ishakemyheadandput
mygunback.Iexi tther oom andheadt ot hekit
chen.
Icanhearwhi mper ingcomi ngfrom Nat hisroom.I
l
istencar efull
yandhi scr yi
ng.Iopent hedoorand
hiscry i
nginhi ssleep.Ishakehi m.
"
It
sadr
eam baby
."
"
Mama!
"
Hewakesupsweat
ingandheav
ing.Hewi
peshi
s
t
ear
sandsighs.
"
Boy
.Whyar
eyoudoi
ngt
hist
oyour
sel
f?"
"Iwantt
ofor
getMama.Iwantt
ofor
getsobadbutI
can'
t.
"
"Themor ey outryt of orgett hemor ethethingy ou
runningawayf rom cat chesonwi t
hy ou.Somet hi
ng's
aremeantt obef acedanddeal twith.Runningaway
from somet hi
ngt hathur ty ouwon' tmaket hewound
heal.You' l
lbleedt i
l
l y
ougr owt iredandt hathur ts
mor e.Lifeisar ol l
ercoast er .Ittakesy ouhighand
bringsy oudowni nhighspeedt haty ouwer en't
readyf or.Youcannev erpr epar eforpai ninli
febut
i
tsupt oy outol ear nhowt ocopeanddeal withit.
Don'tletwhaty ousawdef iney ou.You' reagr eatkid.
Focusondeal i
ngwi tht his.Youcant alktome
any t
imey ouwant .Idon' twanty oufall
inginto
depr ession.Don' tdot hist oy ourself.
"
Henodsandat
tempt
stohugme.
"Sies.Wit
hallt
hatsweat?Got
akeashowerandj
oin
mei nthekit
chen.I
'm maki
ngwar
m mil
kand
biscuit
s."
Hesmi
l
es.
"
I'
ll
bet
her
emom.
"
"
Okaymf
anawam.Il
ovey
ouokay
."
"
Ilov
eyout
oomom.
"
Ileavehi m andcheckonLami who'
sf astasl
eep.I
helphi m sl
eeppr operly
.Thisonewi l
lbreakhisneck
oneday .Nkanyezi i
ssleepi
ngwhi l
esucki ngonhis
fi
nger s.Hewon' tletgoofthishabit
.Ikissthei
r
foreheadsandl eav ethem.IfindKuhlekonkewith
Snei ntheki t
chen.
"
Heyy
'al
l
."
Shet
urnsar
oundandsmi
l
esshaki
ngSnesbot
tl
e.
"Hey.I
'
m maki
ngthi
soneabot
tl
ebecausehe
doesn'
twantt
osuckonmyboobs.
"
Itaket
hebott
lefrom herandsqueezealit
tl
emilk
ontomywrist
.Itakehimf r
om herandfeedhim.He
l
ooksexact
lyli
keeveryone.Nosignthathi
s
Kuhl
ekonkesson.Ihatet
heKhuzwayogenes.He
st
art
scryingandspit
ti
ngoutt
heformul
a.
"
Shedi
dthatwi
thmymi
l
ktoo.
"
Iopenhi
smout
handl
ookathi
stongue.
"
Uney
il
onda.
"(Hegotsor
es.
)
"
Ist
hatbad?
"
"I
thappenst
oal
otofki
ds.Passmehi
stowel
and
somesugar.
"
ShedoessoandIt akesomehoneyf r
om thef ri
dge
andpouritonthetowelthandipiti
nsugar .Iopen
theli
tt
lefel
l
owsmout handr ubhistonguewi thit
.He
cri
esbutIdon'
tstop.Ipulloutt
hetowel andhe
fi
nall
yisablet
otastethehoneyandsugar .
"
Passmet
hebot
tl
e."
Hef
eedsf
orawhi
l
ebef
orespi
tt
ingagai
n.
"
Justkeepr
ubbi
nghi
stonguel
i
ket
hatandhe'
l
lbe
f
ine.
"
"
Thanky
ou.
"
Ismi
l
eatherandhandt
hesl
eepyf
ell
owt
oher
.She
burpshim andheadsoutofthekit
chen.Iwi pe
my sel
fandlaughli
ghtl
y.Nkanyezi
usedt otakeme
forari
deaswel l
.Iwarm upthemilkandt akeout
chocolat
ebiscui
ts.Nkosi
nathi
walksinlookingfr
esh.
Ihandhim hisgl
assofmi l
k.
"
Thanky
oumom.
"
Inodandt
akeasi
pofmymi
l
k.Ismi
l
eatt
hewar
m
tast
e.
"Youknowmom somet i
mesIwishIneverwentout
ofmyr oom whenIheardshout
ingdownstai
rsandI
wishIneversatatt
hestair
caseandwatched.Iwi
sh
Ineversawanythi
ng."
"
Andthat
'sokaybutunl
essy ouhav
eageni
eyour
wi
shesmightcomethrough.Doyoumi
ssyour
mom?"
"
No.
"
"
Why
?"
"Shewasn'
texact
lyamother
.Shecaredmor eabout
anewpairofheel
sthanbedidforus.Shecheat
ed
ondad.Alot
.Dadusedtogoonbusi nesst
ri
psthen.
She'dbri
ngov erherfri
endsandbyf ri
endsImean
guys.Shedidn'twantustocallhermom.Shesai d
wewer erui
ningherr eput
ati
on.Shenev ercl
osedher
mout habouthowmuchofami stakewewer e.The
onlyti
meshef akedcari
ngwaswhenDadwas
around.
"
"
Howdi
dherdeat
hmakey
ouf
eel
?"
"
Iwassoangryatmysel
fforbei
nghappy
.Ididn'
t
wantt
obebutIwas.Shehadnotonl
ybrokenusbut
Dadaswel
l.
"
"
Doy
ouhat
eyourf
atherf
orki
l
li
ngy
ourmom?
"
"Icouldnev
erhat ethatman.Heknewwewer en'this
kidsbutsti
l
ltreatsusasi fweare.Hehasnev er
evenoncemadeusf eell
ikewe'r
enot.Hegav eus
thebestchil
dhoodmemor i
es.Helov
edus.Her aised
uswel l
.Whathedi dstil
lhauntsmebutthereisno
ounceofhatet owardshim.Iwasangr yatf
irstunt i
lI
talkedtohi
m."
"
Wheny
out
oldhi
m howdi
dyouf
eel
?"
"If
eltrel
i
evedthathefinal
l
yknew.Iwassot i
redof
carr
yinghissecr
etaround.Itwei
ghedheav
il
yon
me.
"
"
Whydoy
out
hinkt
heni
ght
mar
esar
est
il
lther
e?"
"
Idon'
tknowr
eal
l
y."
"Thatsbecausey ou'
resoangryatyourmother.You
saidyouwer ehappyshewasdead?May bethats
anotherreason.Youbaskinthati
mageseei ngthe
womanwhogav ebir
thtoyoubutreject
edy'al
ldie
causeitmaygi veyoupeacethatsheisn'
taroundto
rej
ecty'al
lagain.
"
Hesi
ghsandwi
peshi
stear
s.
"
Ist
her
eany
thi
ngel
sey
ou'
dli
ket
otel
lme?
"
Henodsaft
err
unninghi
shandt
hroughhi
shai
r.He
needsanewhai
rcut.
"
Thesi
tuat
ionbet
weenmeandTj
i
napot
ra.
"
"
Who'
stj
i
napi
ta?
"
Hechuckl
esandshakeshi
shead.
"
Sor
ry.ImeantAmanda.
"
"
Whooo.What
'sgoi
ngonbet
weeny
'al
l
?"
"
Idon'
tknow.Shesayswe'
ref
ami
lyandt
hat
soneof
t
hereasonsshecan'
tbewi
thme.
"
"
Oh.Doy
oul
oveher
?"
"
Alot
."
"
Thanwhyar
eyouhol
dingback?
"
"Idon'
twantt
opusht
oohar
d.Shedeser
vesbet
ter
anyway."
"
Who'
sbet
ter
?"
"
Idon'
tknowMom.
"
"Soyou'
rewi
ll
ingt
olethergo?Letherbewi
th
anot
herguy?
"
Hef
rownsatt
hatandIst
if
leal
aught
er.
"
No.Shecan'
tbewi
thanot
herguy
."
"Don'ty
outhinki
tsunfai
rthou?Youhav
edif
fer
ent
gir
lsinyourbedever
yweekendbutshecan'
tbewit
h
anotherguy?"
"
But
-"
"
No.I
fyouwi
l
li
ngt
oletherbet
hanherbei
ngi
na
r
elat
ionshi
pshoul
dn'
tbey
ourbusi
ness.
"
"
Wil
li
tbewor
thi
tthou?Thepai
n?"
"
Asl
ongasshe'
shappyr
ight
?"
"MaybebutofI
'
m nott
heonemaki
ngherhappyt
han
Ican'
t.
"
Isi
ghandshakemyhead.Thi
sonet
ookaf
terhi
s
fat
heranduncl
es.
"
Thanshowhery
oul
oveher
."
Henodsandtakesabi
teofhi
slastbi
scui
t.He
comesandhugsme.
"
Thanky
oumom.
"
"
Any
time.
"
HeleavesandIcl
eanup.Ilookatthecl
ock.I
t'
s
01:
34andt heyst
il
lnotback.Igobackt
omyr oom
andpray.

AMANDA
I
'
m wokenupbycol
dhandspul
l
ingme.Iopenmy
ey
esadr
ubt
hesl
eepof
fthem.
"
It
sjustme.
"
I
t'
sNkosi
nat
hi.
"
Whatt
imei
sit
?"
"
Prol
l
yhal
fpastone.
"
"
Yourhandsar
ecol
dmanNat
hi.
"
"
Sor
ry.Maket
hem war
m."
Heput
sthem i
nsi
demypyjamapantsandIshiveras
hi
scol
dhandscomeincontactwi
thmybuttcheeks.
"
Whyar
en'
tyoui
nyourr
oom?
"
"
Imi
ssedy
ou.
"
"
Soy
ouchoset
ocomeandhar
assme.
"
"
Mxm.Asi
fyoudon'
tl
ikei
t.
"
"
Mxm.
"
Theonl
yli
ghti
nthisr
oom isf
rom t
hemoonlight
.I
canseehal
fofhi
sface.Ir
unmyfinger
sthr
oughhis
hai
r.
"
Ouch.
"
"
Sor
ry.
"
Ipul
lmyf
inger
soutofhi
stangl
edhai
r.
"
Ineedt
ogetahai
rcut
."
"
Why
?"
"
It
sov
ergr
own.
"
"
Ili
kei
t.
"
Igr
abaf
ist
ful
ofi
t.
"
Ofcour
sey
ouwoul
d.Il
ookhandsome.
"
"
Psssht
hat
'snotev
ent
her
easonwhy
."
"
Why
?"
"
Hay
i.
"
Hepul
lsmyli
pswit
hhisteet
h.Hepecksmyli
ps.I
cl
osemyeyesatt
hefeel
ofhisli
psonmine.
"
Openy
ourey
es.
"
Iopenthem andhegiv
esmeal opsidedsmi l
e.He
pul
lsmyf aceandourl
ipsconnectagain.Imissed
hi
skisses.Hegetsi
nbetweenmyt highs.Hepul l
s
outandlooksatme.Helooksdownatmyexposed
br
east
s.
"
It
sagoodt
hingy
ouonl
ysl
eepi
nyourunder
wear
."
Hi stonguejolt
soutandwetshi
slowerlip.He
at t
acksmyl ipsagai
nandIdon'
tresi
st.Hisonehand
cupsmybr eastandtwir
lsmyni
pplearoundhis
fingers.I
'm putt
yinhi
shandsandheknowsi t.
[REMOVED]

LANGALAKHE
Wefoundaleadandl eftatmidnight
.We'
reopposi
te
Nkany
ambaZi kodesflat.We'r
elooki
ngathi
m
sl
eepi
ngthr
oughbi noculars.
"
Iknewt
hathehasahandbehi
ndt
his.
",Khul
ekani
.
Hehasv er
ynosecur i
tyy ethewasgoingagai nstus.
Hethoughthewashi ding.Ndabenkhuluistheski l
l
ed
wit
hwithlongdist
anceshoot i
ng.Wealll
ookathi m
asheholdstheguninhi shandswi t
hhisindexf i
nger
waveri
ngoverthetri
gger.Hewant edtobet heone
pul
li
ngthetri
ggeronhi m.Hi sbeenl
ikethatfora
whil
ewithastoicexpression.Welookateachot her
andnod.Helickshisl
i
psandexhalespul
li
ngthe
tr
iggerandt
hebulletr
ippl
est
hroughtheai
rsil
ent
ly
breaki
ngawindowandpassingthroughZi
kodes
head.
"
Shi
t!
",Khul
ekani
.
Thisonecannev erkeepquiet.Wepackupandl eav
e
theempt yapartment .Wegetintothestol
encarand
dri
veoff.Wel eaveitinthesugarcanef ar
m andwal k
toacrossafterburningourclothesti
ll
wef indour
car.We'r
eallsilentaswegeti nthecar.
"
Weonl yhavetogeta28t oki
l
lthatsonofabi
tch
i
nsi
det her
eandt hanwe'
regoi
ngafter
Oki
ri
."
,Ndabenkhulu.
"
Dadcandeal
wit
hOki
ri
."
,Khul
ekani
.
"Yeahbuttai
mashoul
dfocusonhi
srel
ati
onshi
p."
,
Bhekikhay
a.
"
Bheki
isr
ight
."
,Ndabenkhul
u.
Weal
ll
ookathi
m andKhul
ekani
whi
stl
es.
"Si
khel
aminaguluva.Fedesowumthebelel
e
ngal
enumberepushway it
aimanal
eyathekeni
?"(
tel
l
mebro.Soy
ouokaywi
thwhatdadi
spushi
ngwi
th
t
hatgi
rl
?)
"
BafoIr
eal
izedIwasbei
ngunfai
r.Mom i
sdead.
",he
t
akesadeepbreat
hinandbl
i
nks.
Hewasthemama'sboyandhet
ookmom'sdeat
h
t
hehar
destsi
ncehist
heemoti
onal
one.
"Daddeserv
estobehappy.Ican'tkeephol
dinghim
backbecauseIal
wayspict
urehim withmom.Hi sa
greatt
aimaandthi
sistheleastIcoulddof
orhim.",
Ndabenkhul
u.
Khul
ekani
pat
shi
sshoul
derashi
ssi
tt
ingbehi
ndhi
m.
Wepassi
ngthrougheMl
azi
nowandIr
eal
i
set
his
Toy
otacor
oll
ahasbeenfol
l
owi
ngus.
"Baf
o.Ley
akari
mzobanei
sey
ithendeni
."
(t
hatcar
hasbeenfol
l
owingus.
)
Theyalll
ookbehindusandNdabenkhul ustepson
theaccel
erat
or.Khul
ekanitakesouthisgunand
openshiswindow.Hetakeshi supperbodyoutand
star
tsshooti
ng.Theothercarstart
sshooti
ngback.
"
Fuck!
",Khul
ekani
.
Bheki
khay
apul
l
shi
m backbyhi
spant
s.Hei
s
bl
eedi
ng.
"
It
sjustaf
leshwound.
",Bheki
khay
a.
Weal
lrel
easebreathsofr
eli
ef.Thatl
aait
ieshould
st
opwatchi
ngactionmovi
es.Heai n'
tTerminat
or.
"
Letmet
aket
hewheel
!"
,Bheki
khay
a.
Theyexchangeseatsdanger
ousl
ybutweusedt
o
thi
s.Abull
etpassesnearmywindow.
"
Hol
yFuck!
"
Bhekikhay
aspeedsoffandtakesadrast
ict
urnint
o
eMlazikaA.Ndabenkhul
uhashisT-shi
rtpr
essedon
Khulekaniwho'
sbusyshout
ing.
"
Mal
udai
sgonnaki
l
lme!Fuck!Fuck!
",Khul
ekani
.
Ilostcountoft hefuckshissaid.Wel
lwe'
real
lgoi
ng
togetki l
led.Unyezii
sgonnahav emyassasmyear
i
sbl eedingfrom thatbul
let
.Whenwegetoutof
eMl aziBhekikhayahaslostthem.
"
Whatwast
hat
?",
Bheki
khay
a.
"
Ithi
nkwewer
eaboutt
obehi
j
acked.Thecar
star
tedf
oll
owi
ngust
hemomentwepassedV
secti
on.
"
"Idon'
tgiv
eaf
uck!Mal
udai
sgoi
ngt
oki
l
lme!
",
Khulekani
.
"
OhGod!
",Ndabenkhul
u.
"
You'
rebl
eedi
ng.
",Bheki
khay
a.
"
Yeah.Theyal
mostshotmyearof
f.
"
"
Great
!NowUny
ezi
isgonnaki
l
lust
oo!
",Khul
ekani
.
"
ShutupKhul
ekani
!"
,Ndabenkhul
u.
Wedr i
vetomyhouseinKwaMashutochanget
he
wreckedcarandgetaf
ir
stai
dki
t.Icheckt
heti
me.
04:23.
.
.
Wedr i
veintothedri
vewayby08: 46wi t
haf reshcar
andfreshclot
hes.Khulekaniiswear
ingahoodi eto
coveruphisbandage.Cowar d.Letmenotj udgeas
I'
m weari
ngabeani etocov ermyear.Wewal ki
nand
fi
ndBaba, Nal
edy,
Uny ezi
,Tshego,
Kuhlekonkeand
Noxolosit
tingar oundt hedinnertabledr i
nkingtea.
Whent heseeusUny ezii
st hefi
rsttost andup
checkingmeov erandhugsme.Isi ghi nreli
ef
si
lentl
ywhenshedi dn'
tseemypl asteredear .
Khulekanii
ssot ensewhenTshegohugshi m.
Bhekikhay
api ncheshi m andwi denshi sey es.Thi
s
oneisgoingtogetusi nt roubl
e.Wesi tdownand
poursomecof f
ee.Nkany ezicomesi nr unningand
tr
ipsbutstandsupandr unsany way .Hepi ft
svhis
handsupt ome.
"
Take.
"
Il
if
thim upandhepl ayswithmyface.Hissti
lli
nhis
pyj
amassoIguesshej ustwokeup.Het akesoffmy
beani
eandpul l
sitbetweenhishandsbefore
weari
ngit.Ndabenkhulustar
esatmewi deey edand
Noxol
oseeshi m.
"
Whathappenedt
oyourear
?",
Noxol
o.
"
Mywhat
?Not
hing.
"
Uny
ezil
ooksatmeandIswal
l
owhar
d.Herey
es
l
andonmyear.
"
Whathappened?
",Uny
ezi
.
"
Wewer
eonourwaybackand.
..
"
Il
ookatBheki
khay
aandheshakeshi
shead.
"
..
.andwewerewalkingattheapar t
mentwewer e
r
entingt
ofol
lowourleadsandIdi dn'
tseethezi
ncs
t
hatwerepackedont hewallandIjustr
ushedinand
i
tcutmyear.Yeah.Rightguy
s? "
"
Yeahy
eahr
ight
."
,t
heal
lagr
ee.
Shesqui
ntshereyesatmeandnods.Dadchuckl es
andmakesthatloudslurpi
ngsoundwi t
hhist
ea.I
smil
eawkwardlyateveryone.Nkanyezi
isnow
asl
eeponmychest .Thisli
tt
lefel
lowgetsmein
tr
oubl
eandfall
sasleep.

NKOSI
NATHI
Amandashakesmeoutofsl
eep.Ir
ubmyey
esand
si
tup.
"
Hey
."
"
Hey
."
Wesmi
l
eateachot
her
.
"
Ever
yonei
sup.Wesl
epti
n."
Shelookssoscar
edpassingmemyclot
heswhi
ch
onlyconsi
stofmyunder
wearandsweat
pant
s.I
dressupwithmydicker
ect.
"
Can'
tIgetamor
ninggl
ory
?"
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.No.
"
"
Butl
ook.
..
"
Ishowhermyer
ectdi
ckasi
tthr
obscauseshe'
s
naked.
"
We'
l
lgetcaught
."
"
Wewon'
t.I
'
llbequi
ck.
"
Sheshakesherheadv i
gorously
.Itakeherhandput
i
tovermyer ectdi
ckandshehol dsiti
nhersmal l
hand.Sheusesherhandt ohelpheraccommodat e
me.Shegoesdownonherkneesandl i
cksmef i
rst.I
moanl owly.Sheplayswithmyballsbefor
et aki
ng
mei nhersmal lwarm mouth.Il
oseitandgr abher
hai
rfuckinghermout h.ShegagsandIpul loutand
aft
ershecat chesbreatheIpumpintohermout h
agai
n.
"
Fuck!
"
Ishootmyl oadi ntoherthroatl
eavi
ngherwi thno
choicebutt oswallow.Ipullmydickoutwhi chi
s
halfer ect
.Ther eistearsi
nherey esandcome
drippingdownhermout h.Sheslapsmyt hi
ghbef or
e
standingup.Shewi pesherdacewithherT- shir
t.I
not i
ceherj uicesrunningdownherl egs.Ipickherup
andl ayheront heunmadebed.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
"
I'
ll
bequi
ck.
"
Ii
nser
tmysel
fint
oherandshemoans.I'
veal
ready
camesoIdoubtIwi
l
lbeasquickasIsai
dI'
dbe.

TSHEGO(
Mal
uda)
Weal
lgobacktoourrooms.We'
rewal
ki
ngt
oour
r
oom whenKhul
ekani
grabsmyarm.
"
Ssshh.
"
Il
ookaround.Ihearmoansandgr
oans.They'
re
comingfr
om Amanda'sroom.Bef
orehecansay
anyt
hingst
upidIputmyhandoverhi
smout hand
pul
lhim away
.Hebreaksint
oalaughwhenweget
i
ntoourroom.Khul
ekanicanbestupi
dwhenhe
wantstobe.
"
Youmustbet
ir
ed.
"
"
Yeah.Wehar
dlysl
ept
."
"SodidI.Iwasworr
ied.Youdidn'
tsaymuchonthat
scri
bbledlet
tery
ouleftheckIcoul
dn'
tev
enreadit
."
"Iwasinahur
ry.Wehadsomet
hingt
osor
tout
nothi
ngmajor
."
Heleavesforthebathr
oom andIknowIshouldn'
t
askmor e.Hemaybecl ownbuthi
ssti
ll
int
imidati
ng.
Iam sl
eepysoIt akeoffmygownandgotinbed.He
walksi
naf teraf
ewmi nutes.
"
I'
m sot
ir
ed.
"
"
Geti
nher
e.Takeof
fthathoodi
e."
"
It
scol
d.I
'
llsl
eepwi
thi
t.
"
Hi
sdef
ini
tel
yhi
dingsomet
hingundert
hathoodi
e.
"
Mmhm.
"
"
Yeah
Heget
sinbedandgr
unt
s.Hepul
l
smet
ohi
m.
"
Thi
scuddl
ewoul
dfeel
bet
teri
fyouwer
eshi
rt
less.
"
"
SleepMal
uda.I
tsCol
d."
"
Mmmmh.
"
Il
ethim bewi
thhi
shoodi
eandf
all
asl
eept
othe
soundofhisr
aci
nghear
t.

THANDO
Iwakeuptomyphoner i
nging.ItsaFacetimefr
om
Ozo.Ir
ubmyey esandchecki fther
e'sany
thi
ngon
myface.Ianswersmi
li
ngti
r edly
.
"
Goodmor
ning.
"
"
Mor
ning.
",Iy
awnout
.
"
Imi
ssy
ou.
"
"
Met
oo.
"
"
I'
ll
seey
ousoont
hou.
"
"
Ihopeso.
"
"
I'
m goi
ngt
owor
k.Justcal
l
edt
ocheckony
ouand
seey
ourbeaut
if
ulf
ace.
"
Ibl
ushal
i
ttl
ebi
tandhel
aughs.
"Cut
e.Got osl
eepagai
nsthandwasami
.I'
l
lcal
lyou
duri
nglunchti
me.Il
oveyou."
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Wedropt
hecal
landIsmi
l
e.Iy
awnandcl
osemy
ey
es.

MLUNGI
SI
Ndabenkhul
ur emai
nsbehi
ndaf
terahi
sbr
other
slef
t.
Herubshisface.
"
BabaI'
m sorr
yforhowIreact
ed.Iam st
il
lwrappi
ng
myheadaroundthi
s.I
fshemakesy ouhappythan
I
'
m happyforyou.
"
"Thankyouson.I'
m gladyoucamearound.I
expectedyourbehav
iorfr
om Langal
akhel
ihl
esi
nce
hisstubbor
n."
"
Heact
ual
l
ytooki
tqui
tewel
l
."
"
Howdi
ditgo?
"
"Nkanyambaisdead.We'r
edeal
i
ngwithNoxol
osex
aft
erthis.Oki
rimi
ghtgi
veusaprobl
em."
Naledystandsupandgivesusspacewhenshe
noti
cesthechangeoftopic.SheknowsIgetmy
handsalitt
ledi
rt
ysometimes.
"
Howdot
heycomet
oget
heri
nthi
sequat
ion?
"
"Nkany ambawasappr oachedbyMsi ziso
Nkany ambacouldtakeoutNoxol o.Okiribeingour
ri
val f
oundopportunityandmadeadeal witht hese
men.Theywer et
ot akeusoutsl owl y
.Nkany amba
plannedt hehi
tandt henextonewasonUny ezi .We
allhaveweaknessessot heyweret hefi
rsttar gets.
Sanewasntsupposet ogetmi xedint hecrossf ire
andt hatcausedali
ttlebridgebetweent hem andi t
waseasygett oMsizi.Hecoughedupqui t
eal ot.
"
"
Oki
rii
sati
tagai
n?"
"
Yeah.
"
Icr
ackmyknuckl
es.
"
Leavehi
mtome.Ishoul
d'
veki
l
ledhi
m whenheput
t
hathi
tonmywi
fe."
"
Don'
tl
ethi
m getawayt
hist
imear
ound.
"
"
Iwon'
t.
"
HestandsupandIfol
l
ow.Webot
hpar
tway
swi
th
t
houghtsinourmi
nds.
58
UNYEZI
"
I'
m notl
yi
ngmawabo.
"
"
You'
rel
yi
ng.
"
"
I'
m not
."
"
Youar
e."
"
I'
m not
."
"
Youar
e."
"
Okay
.Ial
mosthadmyearshotof
f.
"
Hewidenshi
sey
eswhenher
eal
i
sedhej
ustt
oldt
he
t
rut
h.
"
Thati
swhaty
ouwant
edmet
osayr
ight
?"
"
Don'tpullt
hatonme!You'reaf
athernowLanga!
Whatifthebull
etwentthr
oughyourhead?
!Worse
youf
uckenl i
eaboutit
!"
"
I'
m sor
rybutst
opshout
ing.I
'
m sor
ry.
"
"
Ifyouev
ergooutagai
ntodowhatevershi
ty'
all
do
i
nthemiddl
eoftheni
ghtandgetshot
!Langa!
"
Icl
apmyhands.
"
Iwi
l
lki
l
lyouandIwon'
tmi
ssl
i
ket
heydi
d!"
"
IknowI
'
m sor
ry.
"
It
urnaroundandhesnakeshi
shandsar
oundmy
waist
.
"
Don'
tgetangr
ynow.Lookatme.
"
Het
urnsmear
oundandsmi
l
es.
"Ishoul
d'vebeenmorecar
eful
.Ipr
omi
seIwon'
tbe
atthereceiv
ingendofabul
let
."
"
Stayawayf
rom bul
let
sLanga.Idon'
tknowwhat
y
'al
ldobuti
fyouareagangsterI
'l
l
-"
"
Iknowyou'
ll
kil
lme.I
'
m notagangst
er.I
'
mjusta
r
ichguywi
thenemi
es."
"
Youbet
terbe.I
'
lll
eav
eyourass.
"
"
You'r
enev
ergoi
ngt
oleaveme.Theonl
yti
mey
ou'
l
l
l
eavemewill
bei
nacoff
in.
"
Il
ookathi
m andhei
sser
ious.
"
Arey
out
hreat
eni
ngme?
"
"Ni
ksmabhebheza.Kodwaokukakesarukuyohl
ala
kungokwakesar
u."(
noband.Butwhatbel
ongstome
wil
lal
waysbemi ne.
)
Il
ikei
twhenheget
sal
lkasi
onmebutr
ightnowI
dontl
i
kehist
one.
"
I'
m noty
ourbel
ongi
ng.
"
"
Angi
shongo.
"(Idi
dn'
tsay
.)
Heki
ssesmegr abbi
ngmyassandsqueezi
ngi
t.He
r
ubshisboneronmygroi
nandImoan.
"
Youl
ooksexywheny
ouangr
y."
Hewhisper
sint
omyearandni
psati
t.Hel
i
cksmy
neckandbi
tesi
t.
"
Euw.Ihav
en'
tev
ent
akenashowery
et.
"
"
Ili
key
ousweat
y."
Heli
ftsmeupandIgi ggle.Wai t
-wasn'tIangr
yat
hi
m?I '
ll
beangryathim afterthi
s.Hel ay
smeont he
bedandunti
esmyf l
uff
ygownexposi ngmynaked
body.Hesmil
esandmakesapur ri
ngsound.He
undr
esseshi
msel fandgetsi nbetweenmyt hi
ghs
agai
n.Heposit
ionshimselfandpenet ratesme
causi
ngmet
ogaspf
orai
r.
"
Howmanyt i
messhoul
dIt
ell
yout
onotr
aisey
our
v
oiceatme?
"
IknewIwasn'tgonnagetawaywit
hshouti
ngathi
m
butIhadhope.Idon'
tanswerandhet
hrust
sint
ome
ball
sdeepandIscream.
"
Howmanyt
imes-
"
"
Alway
s!"
,Iscr
eam outwhenr
amsi
ntomeagai
n.
"
Nowwhydoy
oukeepdoi
ngi
t?"
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
Heholdsmywr i
stst
ogetherabovemyheadsoI
don'
tscrat
chhi
m.Het akesapill
owandputsi
t
undermybutt
.
"Why?"Thrust."
Do.."Thrust."
You..
."Thr
ust
."Keep.
..
"
Thrust
."Doing..
."Thrust
."It
?"Thrust.
Ican'
tseem tof
orm asensibl
esentenceashe
keepshit
ti
ngmyg- spotpl
entyoft
imes.Itr
yf r
eeing
myhandsf r
om hisholdsbuthehol
dsmet ighter
.
That'
sgoingtobrui
se.
"
Answerme.
"
"
I.
..I
..
.AaaaaahLanga!
"
MylegsshakeasIfeel
abui
l
dcomingandmybody
goesri
gidbuthest
opsmovi
ng.No!
"
Langapl
ease.
"
Hestar
tsmovingwhenheseest
hatI'
vecal
m down
fr
om myalmostorgasm.Hi
ssweat
ingandbreat
hing
heav
il
yontopofme.
"
Ify
oudon'
tanswermeI
'
llst
opcompl
etel
y.
"
Iopenandcl
osemymout
haf
ewt
imesAndhe
stops.
"
Iwasangr
y."
Hestart
smov
ingagai
n.Sl
owert
hist
imebutst
il
l
deep.
"
DoIev
ershoutaty
ouwhenI
'
m angr
y?"
Ishakemyheadv
igor
ousl
y.Hepi
nchesmyt
high.
"
No!
"
Hest
art
spumpi
ngi
ntomef
astandIt
ryf
reei
ngmy
handst
onosuccess.Icl
enchmyt
highsar
oundhi
m
andhegroans.
"
Uny
ezi
you'
rehur
ti
ngme.
"
"
Youar
etoo.
"
Heholdsmyl egupandcar ri
esonthrustingi
ntome.
AbuildknotsupinmyabdomenandIar chmyback
shaki
ng.Icum hardandhef ucksmet hroughitandI
cum againandhef ol
lows.Hecli
mbsof fmeand
rol
lsovertothesidenexttome.Wel ayinsil
ence
breat
hingheavil
ytryi
ngtogetourbreathingi
nor der
.
"I
'
m sor
ry.I
'
llbecaref
ulnextt
imeandIwi
l
lst
ay
awayfr
om bull
ets.
"
"
I'
m sor
ryt
oo.Iwasj
ustangr
y.Iwasscar
ed.
"
"
We'v
ebeentoget
herf
or4year
syetyoust
il
lrai
se
y
ourvoi
ceatmeknowingv
erywel
lIhat
eit
."
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
"Let
'sgotakebath.Sl
eep.We'
l
ltal
kaboutwhat
happenedyester
daythatmadeyoucr
ywhenwe
wakeup."
Inodandhet
akesmei
nhi
sar
msandcar
ri
esmet
o
t
hebat
hroom.

NDABENKHULU
Iwipehermout handt aketheempt
yplat
et ot
he
ki
tchen.IthankKuhlekonkefort
hefoodandshe
smiles.Isi
tacrossherwhenIgettoourroom.
"
MaSi
l
angwe.
"
Sher
aisesherheadandl
ooksatme.
"
Arey
ouokay
?"
Shenods.
"
Shoul
dIcal
lthedoct
or?
"
Sheshakesherhead.Isi
tnextt
ohercar
eful
nott
o
hur
ther.
"
Ngi
yaxol
i
sa.
"(I
m sor
ry.
)
Thesi
l
enttreat
mentiski
l
li
ngme.Shehasntt
alked
tomesincethedayshef
ell
.
"
Ital
kedt
oDadandwesortedoutourpr
obl
ems.I
wasbei
ngunf
airandIr
eal
i
sedthat.
"
"
It
'sf
ine.
"
"
I'
m sor
ryt
haty
ouf
ell
."
"
Itwasn'
tyourf
aul
t.
"
"
Part
iall
y.I
fyoudi
dn'thav
etorepri
mandmysel
fi
sh
way
st hanyouwouldn'
thavegot
tenangr
yandt
ri
ed
t
owal koff
."
Ihol
dhergoodhandandki
ssi
t.
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
"
It
sokay
."
"
I'
ll
makey
ousomev
eget
abl
elesagne.
"
Shesmi
l
esal
i
ttl
eandnods.
"
Am If
orgi
ven?
"
"
Aft
eraf
ootr
ub.
"
"
I'
mti
redkodwaMaSi
l
angwe.Ihav
en'
tsl
ept
.It
's.
..
"
Il
ookatmywat
ch.
"
12:
24andIspental
lmor
ningt
ryi
ngt
otal
ktoy
ou.
"
"
Footr
uby
ami
Khuz
way
o."
Sher
elaxesbackont
hebedandwi
ggl
eshert
oes.
"
You'
reabul
l
y."
"
Footr
uborI
'
llmaket
hataf
ull
bodymassage.
"
"
Iwoul
dn'
tmi
nd.
"
Shel
aughssweet
ly.Shel
ookssobeaut
if
ul.
"
Ofcour
sey
ouwoul
dn'
t.
"
Ichuckl
eandgethermassagi
ngoi
l.It
rynott
omake
funofherbabyf
eetseei
nghowI'
m sti
l
lonrocky
waters.

BHEKI
KHAYA
Ij
ustwokeupandt ookashower .Kuhlekonkeisnot
i
ntheroom andSineissl
eeping.Iwakehi m upand
hecri
es.Ishushhi
m.Kuhlekonkewal ksinwithher
apr
onon.
"
Hisup?
"
Inodwhi
l
esmi
l
ing.
"
Youwokehi
m updi
dn'
tyou?
"
"
Imi
ssedhi
m."
"
Bheki
."
"
Sor
ryPeaches.
"
Sheblushesatt henameandIchuckl e.Inamedher
peacheswhenshewaspr egnant.Shewast hi
ckand
yel
low.Iusedt osayshewasr i
pelikeapeachand
shehatedit.Shelikesi
tnow.Women.
"
You'
regoi
ngt
ofeedhi
m."
"
Finebyme.
"
Shenodssmi l
i
ng.IbalanceSinewi
thonehandon
myshoulderandpull
hi smotherwi
tht
heother
towar
dsme.
"
Hey
."
"
Hey
."
Shesmil
esatme.Ipeckherl
i
psandputmy
for
eheadonher
s.
"
SthandwaSam.
"(Myl
ove.
"
"
Ufunani
?"(
Whatdoy
ouwant
?)
"
Not
hing.Can'
tIj
ustcal
lthel
oveofmyl
i
femyl
ove?
"
"
Bheki
khay
auf
unani
?"(
Whatdoy
ouwant
?)
"
Aps5.
"
"
Buyi
tyour
sel
f.
"
"
Babyngy
akucel
a."(
Please.
)
Sher
oll
sherey
esatme.
"Uzoy
enzani
iPs5?
"(Whatar
eyougoi
ngt
odowi
tha
ps5?)
Il
aughatt
hewayshesay
sit
.
"
Sayps5agai
n."
"
Ps5?
"
Il
augh.Shecl
i
ckshert
ongue.
"
It
'snotf
unny
."
"
Iknowbuty
ousoundcut
ebewusi
siza.
"
Sheslapsmyarm andIki
ssher
.Si
necri
esandI
breaktheki
ssof
fgroani
ng.Iwi
shIdi
dn'
twakehi
m
up.
"
Let
'sgof
eedy
'al
l
."
"
Whatdi
dyoucook?
"
I
'
m sur
eit
ssomeI
ndi
andi
sh.
"
SomeI
tal
i
andi
shIf
oundonl
i
ne.
"
Thatsnew.Iknowwe' regoingtobeeat ingI
tal
i
an
foodforthenextfewmont hstil
lshef i
ndsanother
dishtoobsessover.Il
ikedherbetterwhenshe
couldn'
tcookbutIlovehermor eeveryday.Wef i
nd
Amanda, Nkosi
nathiandTshegoeat ing.Wegreet
them andijoi
nthem asKuhl epassesmeSi nesfood.

AMANDA
Weeati nsil
ence.Thisfoodisspicyashel lbutI
makenoef forttel
l
ingKuhle.BhutiKhulekaniwalks
i
nsingingloudlyanditwasn'tpl
easantatal l
.He
ki
ssesSisTshegoscheekandopenst hef r
idge
si
nging.
"
Minangi
yi
gagu.
Phumel
aezansi
.
Ozamaukungi
thi
ntal
ent
simbi
yabel
ungui
zokhal
aka
nt
hatu.
Bhekaamachar
tssonumber1.
Undukuzi
yi
phabazaemcul
weni
.
Mangi
fakei
siphandl
angisit
hat
hekimi
phel
ami
na
ngi
yi
buziey
igqumayo!"
,Khul
ekani
.
Hekeepsquietmumbl
ingt
hantakesof
fhi
s
ear
phones.Hesti
ckst
hem i
nTshegosear
s.
"
Singt
heSot
hopar
t.
",
Khul
ekani
"
Idon'
tknowSot
ho.
",
Tshego
"
Kant
iwhat
'sy
ourhomel
anguage?
",
Khul
ekani
"
Tswana.
",
Tshego
"
Kyaf
anamahn.
",
Khul
ekani
Hepecksherli
psandsit
snexttoher.I'
venev
ermet
someonethi
scrazyinmyli
fe.If
eeleyesonmeandI
tur
naroundandlookatNkosi
nathi
.
"
You'
rebeaut
if
ul.
",hemout
hs.
Ibl
ushandl
ookdownt
ryi
ngt
ocov
ermyf
acewi
th
mybrai
ds.
"
Ayi
samoy
izel
ii
ntombi
kaNkosi
nat
hi.
"(Nkosi
nat
hi'
s
gi
rl
fr
iendi
sbl
ushi
ng.
)
Ev
ery
oneaut
omat
ical
l
ylooksatmeandIcough.
"
Khul
ekani
!"
,Tshego.
"
What
?Weal
lknowt
heset
woar
edat
ing.
",
Khul
ekani
.
"
Awut
hul
eBaf
o."(
Keel
qui
et.
),
Bheki
khay
a.
Ist
andupandt
akemypl
ate.
"
I'
ll
eati
n..
.myr
oom.
"
"Ml
andeleNkosi
nat
hi.Iknowy
ouwantt
o."(
Fol
l
ow
her
.)
,Khul
ekani
.
OhGod!Iwal
koutf
ast
er.Igeti
nmyr
oom andput
t
heplat
edown.
"
Fuck!
"
It
hrowmy sel
font
hebedandscr
eam i
ntomypi
l
low.
Thatwassoembarr
assi
ng.

NKOSI
NATHI
AssoonasAmandal
eftMal
umewasonmycase.
"
Wena!Yourmot
herandf
atherar
esl
eepi
ngi
nthe
nextr
oom butyou'
rebusywi
tht
hepoor
chi
ld.
",
Khul
ekani
MalumeBheki
khay
ashakeshi
sheadf
oldi
nghi
s
ar
ms.Ohsomebodyshootme.
"
Khul
ehl
ebat
hong.
",Tshego.
"
Youhear
dfory
our
sel
fnawebaby
.",
Khul
ekani
.
Hel
i
ftshi
shandsandcl
oseshi
sey
es.
"
Yes!Nkosi
nat
hi!Ir
ecei
ve!OhGodeeper
!"
,he
i
mit
atesamoaningwoman
Everybodyl
aughs.Icovermyf acewi t
hbothhands.I
runawaywhenMkhul uar r
iveswithhisgir
lf
ri
end.His
gir
lf
ri
end.Soundsweirdsayingit.Isneaki
nto
Amandasr oom.
'
Hey
."
Shesi
tsupandsmi
l
esatme.Iscr
atchmyhead.
"
Sor
ryaboutmyuncl
e.Hi
sani
diotsomet
imes.
"
Shel
aughs.
"
Iknow.I
t'
sokay
."
"
Wannapl
ayv
ideogames?
"
"
Sur
e."
Shewear
shersl
i
pper
s.Shehandsmeherpl
ate.
"
No.
"
"
Comeon.
"
"
Myuncl
ewi
l
lhav
emyass.
"
Shestompsherfeetdramati
call
yandIfol
lowbehi
nd
her
.Ileanonthewallsotheydon'
tseeme.When
sheenter
sthekit
chenMal umecanneverkeepqui
et.
"
Makoti
.Uy
ayibonaint
ombi kaNkosi
nat
hiBaba?
"
(
YouseeNkosinat
hi'
sgir
lf
ri
end?)
"
Khul
ekani
leav
emysi
steral
one.
"
Amandacomesoutandshepushesmewhenshe
seesme.
"
What
?",
iaskl
aughi
ng.
She'
l
lgetusedt
ohi
m.
OZO
IreadthemessageIr ecei
vedf r
om SeniorKhuzwayo
again.It
rul
ylovehisdaughterbutIcan'tgoagainst
myownuncl e.YeahmeandOki r
imightnobebest
buddiesbuthisfamil
y.Iputmyphoneawayandt ry
getti
ngbacktowor k.Isi
ghr ubbi
ngmyf ace.It
ake
outmyphoneandcal lThando.
"
Ozo.
"
"
Hey
."
"
Youdon'
tsoundokay
."
"
I'
m not
."
"
What
'swr
ong?
"
"
Imi
ssy
ouandt
her
esbusi
ness.
"
"
Tal
ktome.
"
"
It
'snot
hingbi
g."
"
Whenyoureadyyou'
ll
tel
lme.Justdontdwel
ltoo
muchonwhatevert
hematteri
s."
"
Okay
.Il
ovey
ou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Idr
opt
hecal
landt
extbackKhuzway
o.
"
I'
ll
helpyoucaptur
ehim butf
rom t
hereonwards
y
ou'reonyourown.Nextti
medon'tusemylov
efor
y
ourdaughtertotr
yandgetyourway."
Isendthetextandthr
owmyphoneonemydesk.
WhatdoesOki r
iwantwit
htheKhuzwayo'
sagain?
Thisti
meI'm notsavi
nghi
m.Hisputt
ingThandos
l
ifeinri
sk.
59
UNYEZI
"Aft
erIcheat edony ouIr eal i
sedwhati tdidt oyou.I
putourl ov eatr i
sk.Iturnedy ouintot hi
smonst er.I
ranawayy etIwaswr ong.Youhumbl edyourselfand
tri
edf i
xi
ngt hingsbetweenus.Ist i
ll r
egretittil
ltoday
andIknewi tstil
lhurtyoubutdi dn'tknowt hedept h.
I'
m sorryIev ermadey oudoubtmyl ove.Iloveyou
Uny ezi
.Ilov edy outhef ir
sttimeIsawy ouout si
de
Dad'sbui ldingsmoki ng.I'velovedy ouev ersince.I'
m
sorryIev erdi dsomet hinglikethattoy ou.Ipr omise
onmyl i
fet onev erev engetaner ect i
onf oranother
woman. "
Hisheartrat
eisbeati
ngrapidly
.Ihavemyheadon
hi
schest .AsobbreaksthroughtheairandIsitup
andpullhimtomyl ap.Mymannev erpret
endstobe
str
ongknowi ngverywel
l hi
snot.Ifsomethinghur
ts
hi
m he'l
lcryandIlovehimf ort
hat.
"
Ifor
gav
ey ou.I
'
mt r
yingt
or egai
nmytr
ustt
owar
ds
y
ouandy ou'
remaki
ngiteasierf
orme.
"
"
Iwassupposet
olov
eyou.Tr
eaty
ouwi
thr
espect
.
Youdeserv
eahappilyev
eraft
erfr
om meaft
erall
you'
vegonethr
ough.Ipr
omiseI'
m goi
ngt
opullup
mysocks."
"You'
vegavemethebestmemori
esandy
oustil
lar
e.
Idon'
tthi
nkIcanl
oveanyoneel
seinmyl
if
eti
me."
"
Ilov
eyousomuchmawabo.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Heli
ft
stheoversi
zedT-
shir
tI'
m wear
ingandkisses
myinnert
highwheremy'X'i
sandIwipeatearthat
f
all
s.
"
Cry
.Don'
thol
dback.
"
Heholdsmeandrocksusbackandf or
th.Icr
ywhi
l
e
hol
dingont
ohi
m asifhe'
l
ldisappear
.

MLUNGI
SI
"
You'
reunf
air
."
"
IknowbutIwasbei
nghonest
.Ifhedoesn'
thel
pme
t
hanmydaughterwi
l
ldi
e."
"
Youdi
dn'
tputi
tli
ket
hat
."
"
Iknow.I
'
m sor
ry.
"
"
Idon'
tgety
ousomet
imes.
"
Sheget
sinbedandcov
ersher
sel
f.Isi
tnextt
oher
.
"
Myl
ove?
"
Si
l
ence.
"
Mkami
."
"
I'
m noty
ourwi
fe.
"
"
Youwi
l
lbesoon.
"
"HambaMlungisi
.Iwantt
oal
i
gnmychakr
asand
prayf
ory
ou."(Go.)
Ipul
lthecov
erf
rom herf
aceandki
ssher
.
"
Prayf
orme.
"
"
Iwi
l
l.
"
Iwearmybl ackleatherglovesandleaveourcott
age.
Ever
yoneisasl eep.Igeti
nmycarandsecur i
ty
opensforme.Ihonest lydidn'
tthi
nkSbusisowil
l
haveOkir
isof ast.Idri
vetowher ehesentthe
l
ocati
on.It
'sbyt heocean.Ican'tfi
ndthem.Iseetwo
peopleont hebridgeoverthesea.Irunthere.Thisi
s
apublicspace.Whyt hef uckwouldhewantust o
meetupher e?Where'
st hesecuri
ty?Igettot hem
andOki r
iistiedandonhi sknees.Helookpr etty
beatenup.
"Hi
sally
ours.Don'
tworr
yaboutt
heni
ghtguar
ds.
Theydon'
tseeanythi
ng.
"
Inodathi
sst
atement
.Hel
eav
esust
her
e.Oki
ri
l
aughs.
"
AhKhuzway
omybr
other
."
"
Shutup.
"
"
I'
m sur
prisedyoucaughtmesof
ast
.Thel
astt
ime
y
ouwer en'tsol
ucky
."
"
Thel
astt
imey
ouki
l
ledmywi
fe.
"
Hest
andsupweakl
y.
"Sheshoul
d'v
ebeenmine!Youcameandtookher
from meandgavehert
hosebr at
syoucal
lchi
l
dren!
Thosecould'
vebeenmykids!
"
"
Webot
hknowy
ouwoul
dn'
thav
e."
"Fucky
ou!IfIcouldki
l
lthatbi
tchIwoul
ddoi
tov
er
andoveragain.Shewassickanyway
s!"
"
Butyoudeci
dedtodowhatI
'
m aboutt
odowi
thy
ou
r
ightnow.Pl
ayGod.
"
"
ComeonKhuzway
o.Wecanwor
kthi
sout
."
"
Ali
fef
oral
i
fe.
"
Ishoothim onhisglabell
aandheremainsst
il
l.I
shoothim onhischestandhefall
soverther
aili
ng
andfall
sintothesea.Ilookatt
hemoonandsi gh.
"
Just
icehasbeenser
ved.
"
Iwalkont hesandybeachf orawhilestari
ngatt he
moon.Igobackt omycarwi thmyhear tabitheavy.
Tonightboughtbackal otofbadmemor i
es.Idri
v e
foranotherhourbacktooursaf ehouse.Luckil
yt he
roadsareempt yIwould'vecausedanacci dentwi t
h
thewayIkeepzoni ngout.

(
INTHEMORNI
NG)
NOXOLO
Iam wokenupbyNdabenkhul uonacall
.Itsounds
seri
oussoIli
mpt othebathroom.Mylegisheali
ng
butmyarm notsosoon.Heget sinwhenI'
m
brushi
ngmyteeth.Hestandsbehindmeandl ayshi
s
chinonmyshoulder.Helooksatmethroughthe
mirror
.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
If
ini
shbrushingmyteet
handwest
ayl
i
ket
hatf
or
awhi
le.Hecloseshi
seyes.
"
Msi
zii
sdead.
"
Mybodyf r
eezesforaminuteandInodslowly.He
hol
dsmychi nandIreal
i
seI'vebeennoddingfora
whil
e.Iwon'tl
i
emyhear ti
sbrokenabit.Ionce
l
ovedthatmanandhegav emet hemostpr eci
ous
gi
fti
nmyl if
e.
"
Whathappened?
"
"Hegoti
ntoafightwi
thagener
alandhest
abbed
himtodeat
h."
"
Agener
al?
"
"
Aleaderoft
he28'
s.
"
Inodandt
rytofor
m wor
dsonhowI
'
llt
ell
Sanel
ehi
s
fat
heri
sdead.
"
Letmegot
ell
Sanel
e."
Wewal
koutt
oget
her
.IknockonLangaandSanel
es
r
oom.
"
Comei
n."
Ihol
dNdabenkhul
u'
sar
m.
"
Iwantt
odot
hisal
one.
"
Henodsandcal
l
sLanga.Theyl
eav
eust
oget
her
.
"
Heyboy
."
"
Heymom.
"
"
You'
reokay
?"
"
Noschool.Vi
deogamesf
ood.You'
rehappy
.Why
woul
dn'
tIbe?"
Ismi
l
eti
midl
y.
"
Yourf
ather
..
."
Hef
rowns.
"Uh.
..Hegoti
ntoaf
ighti
npr
ison.Theyst
abbed
him.
"
"
Hisdeadi
sn'
the?
"
"
Yes.
"
Her
emai
nsst
il
landbl
i
nks.
"
Hewasn'
texact
lyt
heper
fectfat
herbuthel
ovedme.
Hedi
edwhil
eIwassoangryathi
m."
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
"
CanIpl
easebeal
one.
"
Inodandl
eavehi
m.I'
m metbyNdabenkhul
uout
side
l
eaningwi
thhi
sfor
eheadonthewal
l.
"
Isheokay
?"
"
Hisabi
tsad.
"
Henodsandhugsme.
"I
'
llbeoutt
oday.I
'
llgi
vey '
al
l somet
imet
omour
n
hi
m.Iknowy oucaredforhim."
Inodandhepecksmyl
i
psandl
eav
eswi
thhi
s
shoul
der
shanging.
KHULEKANI
Itsreal l
yhotandIwantt ot akeanap.Ihardl
yslept
causeIknowhowsneakyMal udais.Shesuspects
I'
m hi dingsomething.I'
m wear i
ngal ongsl
eeveri
ght
nowandI '
m sweating.Idon'teventakeshowers
wi thherany more.Shewal ksinwithashorttowelon.
Ithar dlycover
shermi lkythickthi
s.I'
vebeen
av oidingsexcauseshet ri
esundr essingme.
"
Youcangoshower
."
"
Iwi
l
l.
"
Istandt herelookingather .Iknowt heniggadown
thereisalreadypul sati
ng.Sheseest hetentonmy
pantsandsmi rks.Shedr opshert owel andt urns
aroundandbendsexposi ngherpi nksv agina.Iclear
myt hroatandgot ot hebat hroom.I '
mt akingacol d
shower .Istri
pnakedandt akeof fmybandage.I
l
ookatmywoundandi t
sst il
lraw.Igeti nsidet he
showerandputmyhandsont hewal l
.Thedoor
opensandIcur se.If or
gott ol ockthedoor .Sheget s
i
nbehi ndme.Shest art
st ouchi ngmyar mst il
lmy
shoulder.Ibitemyl i
psoIdon' tgrunt.Shesqueezes
t
hem.
"
AhmahnMal
uda!
"
Itakeherhandof
fandputmyhandov
ermywound.
Iturnar
oundandshehasherar
mswrappedandher
boobsareonmyf ace.
"
Expl
ain.
"
"
It
'snot
hing.
"
"
Reall
y?Whyhaveyoubeenhi
dingthatwoundso
much?Unl
essyougotshott
hatnight
."
"
Gotshot
?Hay
imahnMal
uda.
"
"
Am Il
yi
ng?
"
Shedoest hi
st hingwit
hhershoulder sandneckand
she'sonherbitchmode.I fIsayshe'slyi
ngshe's
gonnafli
pandst ar
tscreamingthatI'
m call
inghera
l
iar.I
fIsayshe' snotshe'smostdef i
nit
elygonna
havemyasst hatIgotshot.Futhihowdi dshecome
totheconclusionthatIgotshot?
"
I'
m wai
ti
ngonmyanswer
."
"
Babei
t'
sasmal
lwound.Iscr
appedmyshoul
der
bl
adenot
hingmaj
or.
"
"
Letmesee.
"
Shestandsonhertoesandlooksatmywound.She
dragsm thr
oughherteet
ch.
"
Scr
apped?Tr
yagai
nKhul
ekani
."
"
OkayIl
ostbal
anceandf
ell
onsomebot
tl
es.
"
"
That
snotacut
."
"
Whatdoy
ouwantmet
osaykodwaMal
uda?
"
"
Thet
rut
h."
Uy
ahl
any
a.
"
Whatt
rut
h?"
"
Khul
ekani
."
"
What
?"
"
Tal
k."
"
Eish.I
tsafl
eshwoundbaby
.Thebul
l
etdi
dn'
tgo
t
hrough."
Shecl
ickshert
ongueandshov
esherf
ingeronmy
wound.Iscr
eam.
"
AchuMal
uda!
"
Shedoesi
tagai
nandIhol
dherhandt
hist
ime.Thi
s
onei
sabull
y.
"
Whydi
dn'
ttheyshooty
ourbl
oodybr
ainout
?"
"
Ehy
ouwantmedead?
"
"
Ostl
aelav
ele.I
fonot
lokafet
seonotl
oetsang?
"
(
You'
reani
diotany
way
.Ifyouhaddiedwhatwere
y
ougonnado?)
Y'
al
lseewhenshespeaksSot
hoshel
osesme.
"Khul
ekaniomotoamahn.Hawubatl
agoswao
buekeobulay
enna.
"(You'
reol
dman.I
fyouwanna
diedi
etell
meandI'
ll
kil
lyou.
)
InodeventhoughIdon'
tunder
standwhatshe'
s
sayi
ng.Iwi
shIhadmyphoner ightnow.Tr
ansl
ator
wouldhel
prightnow.
"
Youhear
dme?
"
"
Yeahbabe.
"
"
Whatdi
dIsay
?"
"
That
..
.uhwenauzabua.
"(Youwi
l
ltal
k.)
Shepi
nchesmeandIj
ump.
"
Isai
difyouwannadi
etel
lmeandI
'
llki
l
lyou.Wi
th
mybarehands.
"
"
You'
recapabl
evel
e."
,Imumbl
e.
"
War
eng?
"
"
Sorr
ybaby.I
'l
lbemor ecar
eful
.I'
l
lst
opact
ingl
i
ke
Ar
noldSchwazzenegar
."
Shepoimtsachubbyf
ingeratmeandt
urnsar
ound.
Ipul
lherback.
"
Uyaphi
?"
"
I'
m goi
ngt
ogetdr
essed.
"
"
Hel
pmeout
."
"
Wit
hwhat
?"
"
YouknowI'
m hur
tandIseem t
obehav
ingi
ssues
wi
thwashi
ngmydick.
"
Shel
aughs.
"
I'
m goi
ngt
ogetdr
essed.
"
Ir
ubmyer
ect
iononherassandshepur
rs.Myhand
tr
avel
stohershavedvaginaandIpartherl
i
ps.She'
s
al
readywet
.Irubhercli
tandshearchesherback
i
ntome.
"
Khul
ekani
."
"
SthandwaSam.
"
ShemoanswhenIinser
tafi
ngeri
nher.She'swet
enough.It
urnusar
oundandmakeherbalanceon
thewall
.
"
Youhav
etopul
lout
.Idi
dn'
tbr
ingmypi
l
ls.
"
Weeeehshamemi nangiyi
bonel
aumawengane
zami.Ii
nser
tmy selfinherandIgr
oanather
ti
ght
nessandwar mt h.Sdudl
asami madoda!
Ngyofel
alaefel
akhona!

KUHLEKONKE
Amandawalksi
ntomyr oom andget
sinbednextt
o
me.Herey
esarejustaspuff
y.
"
HappyBi
rt
hdayst
handwa.
"
"
Thankssi
s."
Wesitinsil
ence.She'
sfi
nal
lytur
ned18.She'
sgr
own
somuch.Itssadhowadaywher eweshouldbe
cel
ebrat
ingisthemostsaddestt
ous.
"
IwenttocheckuponSaneleandLangaearl
ieron.I
f
oundSaneleal
onecryi
ng.Appar
entl
yhisf
atherdied.
Mybi
rthdayisr
eal
lycur
sed."
"
Nost
handwa.Somet
hingshappen.
"
"Buti
fwehadn'twenttocel
ebrat
emybi r
thdayt
han
wewoul dn'
thav
egottenint
othatacci
dent.
Somet i
mesIwishIhaddiedandmom anddad
survi
ved.It
ookthem awayfr
om you."
"NoAmandawe' r
enotdoi ngthisagai
nt hi
syear.
Thatdr
unktruckdri
vertookthem from us.Iknowit
hurt
sbutdon'tt
hinkl
ikethat.Ican'
timaginemylife
wit
houtyou.
"
"Imi
ssthem sometimes.Imi ssDad'
sjokesand
mom'sshyness.Theywer ethehappi
estcouple.I
ts
beenyear
sbutitsti
llhur
ts."
"Thi
skindofpai
ndoesn'
thealeasil
y.I
thurtsme
sometimesli
kewhenIwentthroughdepressi
onand
Iwishedmom wasther
etohelpme.Inev ermetour
agai
ncausehel
ookedsomuchl
i
keDad.
"
"
Iwonderi
ftheyev
ermi
sst
hem.
"
"Whowoul dn'tmisst
hoset wo?Theywerethemost
kindestpeopleI'
veevercomeacross.Remember
howDadboughthobosev er
yweekhomeandhelped
them ontheirfeet
?"
"
Heusedt
osayt
heywer
eourbr
other
s."
"
Thosewer
etheday
s."
Webot
hsi
gh.
"Let
sdosomethi
ngdif
ferentt
odayandstopsul
ki
ng.
Yourbaki
ngski
ll
shav
ei mprovedr
ight
?"
Shenods.
"Wegoingt
obakeacakesi
nceourbakerishurt.We
goi
ngtocookoneofmom'sreci
pe'
s.Setatable
out
sidebyt
hepoolandhav
eami nipar
tyforyou."
"
Ifeel
li
kest
ayi
ngi
ndoor
sandeat
ingi
cecr
eam.
"
"
I'
ll
getNkosi
nat
hit
ochanget
hatmi
ndset
."
"Asif.Heknowstost
ayawayonmybi
rt
hday
s.I
'
m
goingtosleep.
"
"
Please.Manda.
"
Sheget soutofbedanddr agshersel
ft owar dsthe
door.Isitupandl ookatt hedoorasi tshut sbehind
her.Ican'tbakebutI'm sureNoxol ocani nstructme.
I
'm notgoodwi t
hcooki ngsoftcarrotpapbutmy
brotheri
nl awisachef .Iknowhowsheget sonher
bi
rthday.PoorNkosi nathihastobet heonet oget
heroutofbedal one.Igeti ntheshower .Ihope
Bhekikhay afedmychi l
dwher everhei s.
60
LANGALAKHE
WhyIl etUny
ezital
kmei ntohelpingoutwith
Amandaspar ty
.I'
mf ry
ingt hemeatwi thabeeri
n
hand.Wehar dl
ysleptizoloandI '
mt i
red.Iy
awnand
shelaughsgivi
ngmeanener gi
zer.
"
ThandoandNal
edydi
dgood.
"
Shesay sl
ookingaroundsmili
ng.Theysuredid
makesomet hi
ngoutofthespace.Sheleansint
ome
andIkissherhead.Dadissitt
ingunderthetr
ee
al
readysippinghisbr
andy.Hehasn'tt
akenhiseyes
offNal
edy .Hissosmitt
enit
'snotevenfunny.
"
Uny
ezi
!"
Shet ur
nstoKuhl
e'
sv oi
ce.Shewal
ksovertoher
.I
feelatugonmylegandlookdown.Nkanyezi
is
dressedinhi
sswim shor
ts.
"
Khuzway
o."
Il
aughandhegi
gglesaswel l
.Hecall
smet hat
someti
mes.Heheardhismothercall
met hatafew
ti
mesandheneverlookedback.Il
i
fthim upandhe
poi
ntsatt
hemeat .Nowt hi
saKhuzway
o.Realmen
l
ovemeat.IshakemyheadpointatUnyezi
who'
s
car
ryi
ngabowl offood.
"
Mamashout
snj
e."
"
Atl
easty
ouknowherwel
l
.Wai
tti
l
lwedi
shup.
"
RemindmewhyIhav etospeakEngl ishwi t
hmyson?
Ohsohedoesn'tstrugglemuchi nschool .Kodwa
myboywi ll
beapussy .Langapasseswi t
hSanele
andthey'
reinaser
iousconv ersati
on.Sanel el
ooks
shat
teredandknowingmybr otherguil
tiseati
nghim
up.
"
Bhut
i!Letmego!
"
Iputhi
m downandher
unst
owar
dshi
sbr
other
s.
"
Nkany
ezi
stopr
unni
ng!
",hi
smot
hershout
s.
Hewal
kstothem andhugst
hem bot
h.Theyt
ake
hi
m wi
thandtheygochil
lwi
thDad.
"
Whyi
sDadnotdoi
ngany
thi
ngagai
n?"
,Iaskt
hem.
"Hey!Ihav
esonsanddaught
ers.Gr
andchi
ldren
ngaphezul
u.Phi
ti
zel
ani
.Fut
himywifeshouldsit
down."
"
Eh.MaGemashoul
dal
sosi
tdown.
"
"
Awut
hul
ewena.
"(Shutup.
),
Dad.
Imumbl
eandhel
aughswhi
l
est
andi
ngup.
"Bowubonai
ntombiyakhouyaphapha.
"(Wheny
ou
seeyourgi
rl
fr
iendy
ou'refor
ward.)
"
Heh?Uy
akhul
uma?
"(You'
ret
alki
ng?
)
"
Cah.
"(No)
Unyezi
laughsatmeandIt hr
owheral ook.Ihand
themeattoherandkissherbri
efl
y.Iputmyhandon
herwaistandbendsoIcanwhisperintoherear
.
"
Ilov
eyou.Umuhl
eyezwa?
"(You'
rebeaut
if
ul.
)
Shegi
ggl
esl
i
keaschool
gir
landwhi
sper
s.
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.Thanky
ou.
"
Il
etgoofherandshewalksaway
.If
oll
owherwi
th
myeyes.Shecomesbacktomeandyawns.
"
Pleasegomakemesomecof
fee.
"
"
Youknowy
oucan'
tdr
inkcof
fee.
"
"
I'
m notsi
cknj
e."
"Butyouwi
l
lbe.Caf
fei
necangi
vey
ouacar
diac
att
ack."
"
Ist
il
ldon'
tgetwhatt
hathast
odowi
thme.
"
"
You'
rehuman.
"
Sheshakesherheadwalki
ngaway.Idon'
tknowhow
l
ongIcankeeponl y
ingt
oher.She'
sgoingtonot
ice
soonbutbet
tershefi
ndsoutonherown.
"
Uny
ezi
!"
IlookatherasshebalancesonKuhlekonke.Ir
un
towardsherandhelphersitdown.Ihandheraglass
ofwaterKuhlepassestome.
"
Youokay
?"
"
Yeah.I'
vebeenget
ti
ngt
hesedi
zzyspel
l
slat
elyand
ali
tt
lenausea.
"
"
May
bei
tst
hei
nject
ion.
"
"
I'
vebeenusi
ngt
hiscont
racept
ivesi
nceIgav
ebi
rt
h."
Idropmyeyesandcl
earmyt
hroat
.Dadwal
ks
towardsus.
"
Makot
iyou'
reokay
?",
Dad.
"
YeboBaba.
",
Uny
ezi
.
"
May
behegoty
oupr
egnantagai
n."
,Dad.
"
Noway
.",
Uny
ezi
.
Hesmi
l
esandwal
ksawaywhi
stl
i
ngaf
terey
eingme.
"Pr
obabl
ybecausey
ou'
ret
ir
ed.Letmegety
out
o
bed.
"
Il
i
ftherupandt
akehert
oourr
oom.I
'
mfucked.

NKOSI
NATHI
"
Manda.
"
"
Mmmmh?
"
"
Lookatme.
"
Sher
emai
nsl
ayi
ngf
aci
ngawayf
rom me.
"
Tji
napot
ra.
"
Shetur
nsar
ound.Il
owert
hevol
umeonherspeaker
.
Shesit
supandl
ooksatme.Herey
esar
ereal
ly
puf
fy.
"
You'
reokay
?"
ShenodsandIrubmyf
ace.Isuckatt
hese
emoti
onalt
hings.
"Canyounotbesadt
oday?Cany ounotcl
oseof
fon
us?Justf
ortoday
?Babysteps?
"
Shewi
pesawayhertearsandsni
ff
s.Ipul
lheronmy
l
apandki
ssbothhereyes.
"
Ihat
efeeli
ngthiswaybutIcan'
thel
pit
.Ihat
e
r
emini
scingaboutt
hatday.Ihat
ehowIremember
t
hei
rscreams.Ihat
e-"
Sheshakesherheadandst ar
tscry
ing.Irubherback
soothi
nglywhil
ewhisperi
ngsweetnothingsinher
ear.Shestopswhenshehashiccups.MyT- shi
rti
s
wetwi t
hhertearsandshe'
sholdi
ngont ight
lyonme.
"Iknowithurts.Iwi
shIcoul
dmakeitbetter.Iwi
shI
couldtakeallthepai
nonyourbehal
f.Ihateseei
ng
youlikethi
s."
Iwi
pehert
earwi
thmyt
humbsandki
ssherl
i
ps.
"
Shoul
dIsi
ngf
ory
out
omakei
tbet
ter
?"
Shel
aughsabi
tandpunchesmyshoul
dersl
i
ght
ly.
"
You?Si
ng?No.Idon'
twantt
orui
nmyhear
ing.
"
Ichuckl
eatt
hatshaki
ngmyhead.
"
I'
m ser
ious.
"
"
Ohwel
l
.Ki
l
lme.
"
Il
etgoofherandhandher
,herphone.
"
Youmi ghtwanttotakeav
ideocausethi
sisthi
sis
t
hefi
rstandthelastti
meI'
m si
ngingf
oryou."
Sheroll
shereyesandIcl
earmythr
oat.Justwhen
I
'm aboutt
osingther
eisaknockonthedoor.
"
Comei
n."
MalumeKhul
ekani
walksi
nandsmi
l
eshi
sgoof
y
dumbsmil
easusual.
"
RomeoandJul
i
et.
",
Khul
ekani
.
"
Mal
ume.
",Ichuckl
e.
"
Ihear
dmakotiwasn'
tokaytoday
.Waswonder
ing
whywewerehavi
ngporri
dgeforbreakf
ast
t
oday.
",
Khul
ekani
.
Weallchuckle.Mom madebreakfasttodayandshe
madesof tporr
idgeasusual
.Ever
y onecomplai
ned
butUnyeziKhuzwayohadthem eatingitandmade
sur
ewef
ini
shedi
t.
"
Sot
ell
mewhat
'swr
ongmakot
i?"
,Khul
ekani
.
Hesi
tsont
hecouchandl
ooksatus.
"
Not
hingmuch.
",
Manda.
"Icoul
dhearyoucryi
ngacr
osst
he
hall
way."
,Khul
ekani
.
Weal
lkeepqui
et.Thi
sissoawkwar
d.
"Wel
lIwassentheret
otel
ly'al
ltogetr
eadybyt
his
onesbul
lymother
."
,Khul
ekani.
Hest
andsupandopensthedoor
.Hehalt
sonhis
st
epandremai
nsst
andingwit
hhisbackt
owar
dsus.
"Amanda.Iknowt hepai nofl osi
ngapar entandits
onewoundt hatnev erheals.Asgr ownasIam
somet imesIneedmymot her.Don'tdwel l
toomuch
onthesadness.Getof fthatbed.Celebrateyour
bir
thday .Doitforyourpar entsandKuhl ekonke.
Carrythemi ndsetthaty ou'r
emaki ngt hem proud
andt heywillal
waysbewi t
hy ouaround.I t
snev er
easybutcr yi
ngwon' tmakei teasy."
,Khulekani.
Hest
epsoutandcomesbacki
n.
"
Ohandcr
yingmal
esy
oul
osewei
ght
."
,Khul
ekani
.
Hecl
osesthedooragai
nandwehearhi
m si
ngi
ng
somemaskandisongdownthehal
l
way.
"
Youhear
dhi
m.Getup.
"
Shest
andupandshedoesl
ookl
i
keshel
ostabi
tof
wei
ght.
"
You'
ret
aki
ngashowerwi
thme?
"
"
No.Webot
hknowwe'
l
lnev
ergetout
."
Inodunder
standi
ngl
ysmi
l
ing.Iki
ssherf
orehead.
"
Seey
oui
nasec.Beal
ri
ght
."
ShenodsandIexi
t.Ihearhermusi
cpl
ayagai
nandI
si
gh.

KUHLEKONKE
"
You'
resur
eshe'
scomi
ng?
",
IaskKhul
ekani
.
"
Yes.Rel
ax.
",Khul
ekani
.
"
Shebet
tercome.I
'
m wear
ingj
eansf
ort
his.
",Langa.
Weal
ll
aughhi
m.Hi
sbeencompl
aini
ngsi
nce.
"
Letmegetussomewi
ne.
",
Uny
ezi
.
Shestandupandget sabott
le.Shepour
susgirl
s
gl
assesandhandsi tt
ous.Weal lst
andupandgo
si
tawayf r
om theloudmen.Langacomet owar
dsus
andtakestheglassfr
om Unyezi
.
"
Hai
bo.Langa.
",Uny
ezi
.
"
Sorr
ybabe.Canyoust
ickt
othej
uicef
or
t
oday?"
,Langa.
"
Why
?Gi
vememygl
ass.
",
Uny
ezi
.
"
CanIt
alkt
oyou?
",Langa.
Hepul
l
sherasi
dehandi
ngt
hewi
net
oNal
edy
.She
gul
psi
tdown.
"
Shame.It
sgoingt
obeal
ong9mont
hswi
thout
wi
ne.
",Nal
edy.
Weal
ll
ookather
.
"
Huh?
",Thando.
"
Not
hing.
",
Nal
edy
.
Weall
shr
ugt
alki
ngandwai
ti
ngf
orAmandat
opop
up.
UNYEZI
"
Ican'
tdr
inknow?
",
Ishoutwhi
sperathi
m.
"
Yes.
"
Il
ookathi
m nast
yandher
ubshi
sface.
"
Look.Youcan'
tdr
ink.
"
"
Why
?Si
ncewhenar
eyout
hathusband?
"
"
It
snotaboutt
hat
.Tr
ustme.Justdon'
tdr
ink.
"
"
I'
m goi
ngt
osl
eep.
"
It
rywal
ki
ngawaybuthehol
dmywai
st.
"
Uny
ezi
."
Il
ookathi
m.
"
Cal
m down.I
t'
snott
hatdeep.Justdon'
tdr
ink.
"
"I
fitsnotcof
feei
t'
swi
ne.You'
ret
reat
ingmel
i
keI
'
m
pregnant.
"
Hecl
ear
shi
sthr
oatandscr
atcheshi
sbear
d.
"
No.I
tsj
ustt
heki
dsar
eher
eandIdon'
twantt
hem
t
oseeyoudr
unk.
"
"
But
-"
"
Please.Don'
tfi
ghtmeont
his.
"
"
Fine.
"
Hesi
ghsi
nrel
i
efandki
ssesme.
"
I'
ll
gety
ousomeor
angej
uice.
"
Inodandhewalksaway
.Ilookathim.Hisupto
somethi
ngandhecan'
tevensitst
il
lwit
hit.Iwal
k
backt
othegir
ls.

THANDO
I'
vebeent ryi
ngt ogetahol dofOzot onoav ailt
oday .
Ireall
ymi sshim.Wel asttalkedint hemor ni ngwhen
Itoldhim we'llbecomi ngbacksoon.Hedi dt el
lme
aboutwhatt ranspi r
edbet weenmyDadandhi s
uncle.Iknowmyf amily'
sotherdi r
tysi de.Heal so
i
nf or
medmeaboutmyhospi tall
ookingr eadyand
thatinspecti
onswer edoneandev erythingwassaf e
andr eady.Finall
y!Ili
kedt hel i
tt
lebuildingwewer e
usingbuti twasn'tmi ne.Uny eziwilll
iket his.We' re
preparingforthegr andopeni ng.Ihat eddoi ngst uff
overt
hephone.Ev
erybodystandsandsingsas
AmandaandNkosinathi
walksin.Poorchil
disso
shyandawkward.
"
Thanky
ou.
",shesay
sshy
ly.
"
Makot
i!
",Khul
ekani
.
Weal ll
aughexceptLangaandNdabenkhul u.They
don'
treallyli
kethi
srelat
ionshipbutNkosinathi
seemst olikethi
sgir
l.From whatI'
vebeent oldthey
shouldletthesetwodate.They '
renotfamil
yaf t
erall
butthelasttimeIsaidthatLangaalmostbitmy
headoff.Kuhletakesthemi c.ThatwasDad' sidea.
DramaticshouldIsay.Wecanhearpr ett
ywel l
.
"Amandamysi ster.Only
.Thisist
hef ir
stti
mei n
yearswe'r
ecelebrati
ngagain.Imissedthat.Imissed
singi
ngthehappybi r
thdaysongfory ou.
..
"
Izoneoutaftert
hat
.Idon'tl
i
kespeeches.
Nkosinat
higetsonstageandtakest
hemic.
"
Idon'
treal
lyunder
standwhatt
hemi
cisf
or.
",
Nkosi
nathi
.
Weal
ll
augh.Weal
lscr
eam,
"It
syourGr
anpasi
dea.
"
"
Yey
i!Uset
hemi
c!"
,Dad.
Wel
aughhar
der
.
"Okay.Iwasgoi
ngtosingf
ortheladyoftheeveni
ng
earl
ieronbutMalumeKhul
ekanidist
urbedus.Mom
thoughti
twouldbeagoodideatosingnow.",
Nkosinathi
.
Il
ookupfrom myphoneandl ookatmynephewas
hebr
eathesi
nandout .Ican'
tremembert
helast
ti
meIheardhi
m si
nging.

AMANDA
Every
oneislooki
ngatNkosinathi
.Hi
smot herl
ooks
l
ikesheisabouttobursti
njoy.NowayNkosinathi
cansing.I
'
veneverheardhim si
ngi
ng.Noteven
once.
"
Imeanti tearl
i
erwhenIsaidyoumightwantt
otake
avideoofthisTji
napot
racausei
tsafir
standl
ast.
",
Nkosinat
hi.
Every
onetakesoutt
hei
rphones.Abeatpl
ays.I
t
soundsf
ami l
iar
.
"
Arey
ouony
ourway
?
Ar
eyoucomi
n'soont
ome?
Nopar
kingi
nLA
SoI
'
masendaUbert
oyourpl
ace
I
smysecr
etsaf
e?
Saf
ewi
thj
usty
ouandme
Wecan'
tl
eav
eat
race
Thi
sismyf
avor
it
emi
stake
Ohh,
looki
nmyey
es
Cany
ouf
indt
hel
i
es?Doy
ouf
eel
ali
ve?
Looki
nmyey
es
Doy
oumi
ndt
hel
i
es?Doy
ouf
eel
ali
ve?
Looki
nmyey
es
Webot
hknowi
t'
swr
ongbuty
ou'
rest
il
lcomi
n'ov
er
Ev
enwheny
ou'
regonet
hef
eel
i
n'j
ustgr
owst
ronger
Shoul
dleav
eital
onebuty
ou'
rest
il
lget
ti
n'cl
oser
Webot
hknowi
t'
swr
ong,
can'
tkeept
hisf
orl
ong
Whi
l
eit
'sgoi
ngon,
I'
ll
puti
tinasong
Ar
eyouony
ourway
?Ar
eyoucomi
n'soont
ome?
I
'
m get
ti
n'i
mpat
ient
,lookatwhaty
oudot
ome
Oursecr
et'
ssaf
esoy
ou'
remyf
avor
it
emi
stake
That
'swhywegot
takeepi
tont
hel
ow
Gi
rlathomebutshedon'
tneedt
oknow
What
'
sgoi
ngon,
itwon'
tbeonf
orl
ong,
no
Ohh,
looki
nmyey
es
Cany
ouf
indt
hel
i
es?Doy
ouf
eel
ali
ve?
Looki
nmyey
es
Doy
oumi
ndt
hel
i
es?Doy
ouf
eel
ali
ve?
Looki
nmyey
es
Webot
hknowi
t'
swr
ongbuty
ou'
rest
il
lcomi
n'ov
er
Ev
enwheny
ou'
regonet
hef
eel
i
n'j
ustgr
owst
ronger
Shoul
dleav
eital
onebuty
ou'
rest
il
lget
ti
n'cl
oser
Webot
hknowi
t'
swr
ong,
can'
tkeept
hisf
orl
ong
Whi
l
eit
'sgoi
ngon,
I'
ll
puti
tinasong.
"
Hej ustsangourfavouri
tesong.I
'
m actual
l
ygladI
tookav ideonow.Ididn'
tknowhehadsuchagr eat
voice.Ifel
tgoosebumpsont opofgoosebumps.We
allclapandhewal kstowardsmesmili
ng.Weshare
alonghug.Hewi pesmyt ear
sandwhispers.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
",Iwhi
sperback.
Wesepar ateandtakeaseat .Iwonderwhocooked
causethissmellsamazi ng.Ieyethecakeandsmile.
Beautif
ul.Ihol
dbackt ears.Mom woul dbesoproud
ofthefami l
yherdaughterismar ryi
ngint
o.Iki
ss
Kuhlescheekandwhi spera' thankyou.
'shesmil
es
wit
ht earsinhereyes.
61
MONTHSLATER
OZO
Iwalkoutofthemeetingcarryi
ngmybr i
efcaseand
st
andi nfr
ontoftheelevat
or.Ireplyt oatextfrom
mymom andputmyphonebacki nt omypocket .
Herscenthit
smeagai nandIt enseupabi t.We
wereinameet i
ngdiscussi
ngopeni nganot her
branchandherscentmademedi zzyt hr
oughoutthe
wholemeet i
ng.Shestandsnexttome.
"
MsKhuzway
o."
"
MrBut
hel
ezi
."
,shegr
eet
sback.
Il
ookatherandsher emainslookingattheelevat
or.
Herphoneringsastheelevat
orpingsandar r
ives.
Webot hst
epi nandstandagooddi stancefr
om
eachother
.She'sonthephonewi ththatsonofa
bit
chsheleftmef or
.Icl
enchmyj awsandl oosen
myt i
e.
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
",shegi
ggl
esandendst
hecal
l
.
Whent
heel
evat
orst
opsIexi
tfi
rstandpasst
he
recepti
on.EveryoneislookingatmeandI '
m sure
theycanseehowpi ssedIam.Ishoul d'
veknown
thatfal
lingf
oray ounggirlwasar i
sk.Sheleftmefor
someonewhowasherage.Igeti nsidemycarandI
puncht hesteer
ingwheel furi
ousl
y.
"
Dammi
tThando!
"
Itakeof fmysui tjacketandmyt i
e.Iunbot tonthe
fi
rsttwobut t
onsonmyshi rt
.Itsbeenov er9mont hs
sinceshel ef
tmef ort hatscumbagt hatcalledhera
hoodr at
.Hef oundoutshewasact uallyverywealthy
andst artedhitti
ngonherandbecauseshe' sa
fuckingcl ownshechosehi m.Idon' tgethowshe
wentt ohi m.Thesexwasgood.Ir espect edher .I
knewherper ioddat es.Iremindedhert otakeher
pill
s.Argh!Iseeherget ti
ngintohercarandIst art
theigniti
on.Idr i
veof fangril
yalmostcausi ngan
accident.

THANDO
Iwatchhi
scarasitdr
ivesoff
.Abitofsadnessdoes
engulfmebutIbr
ushitoff
.Hisst
il
langryatmeand
Iwishhecouldunder stand.Sthembisoi st hechosen
onef r
om me.Speaki ngofhi m,It
ransf ersome
moneyt ohim.Igetintomycaranddr iveof fthe
oppositedi
rect
ion.Theki dsarevisi
tingmet odayso
Ihavetocookear l
y.Itakeaqui ckshowerandget
dressedinanov er
sizedT- shi
rt
.Icutt hev egetables
whileI'
m onthephonewi thUnyezi.
"
Yourbrot
her
sar
enotkeenonmeet
ingt
hisguyof
y
ours.
"
"
I'
dbesur
pri
sedi
ftheywer
e."
"
Whatdi
dyousayhi
ssur
namewasagai
n?"
"
Sthembi
soMkhwanazi
.You'
real
way
saski
ngme
t
hat.Why
?"
"I
tsoundsf
ami
l
iarbutl
et'
shopei
tsnott
heoneI
know."
"Uh.
..Okay.Letmef
ini
shcooki
ngbef
oret
hosebr
ats
ofyourscome. "
"
I'
m st
il
latwor
k.Ihav
eonemor
epat
ient
."
"I
fLangassuspi
cionswerereal
youwoul
dbeat
homewi t
hswoll
enf eetandabi
gtummy.
"
"Yourbr
otherkodwa.Iwasreadyt
oki
l
lhi
m.Ican'
t
haveanotherki
drightnow.
"
"
Nawey
ouwer
eal
way
shav
ingdi
zzyspel
l
s."
"
Ichangedt
hecont
racept
ive.Iopt
edf
orpi
l
lst
his
t
ime."
"
Heh!GuesswhoIsawt
oday
?"
"
Who?
"
"
Rememberwehadaboar
dmeet
ingt
oday
?"
"
Yes.
"
"AndSbusi
soi
saboar
dmemberandashar
ehol
der
aswell
."
"
Oooooh.Thet
ensi
onIcani
magi
ne.
"
"YohUny ezi
!Hedidn'
teventakeparti
nthemeeti
ng.
Hej ustsi
gnedthepaperworkfort
hemoneyneeded
sincehisourbi
ggestinv
estorandwalkedout
."
"
Youl
i
e!It
houghthewasgoi
ngt
opul
lout
."
"
Met
oobuthi
sst
il
li
nvest
ing.
"
"
Hisasweetguyt
hou.Hott
oo.
"
Il
aughabi
t.
"
WorsewhenIwenttocat
chanel
evat
ornay
ehe
wasther
e.Tensi
on!
"
"
Hah!Awkwar
d!"
"Yeyi!West
oodthereandmyphonerang.WhenI
saidIlovey
outoSthehelostit
.St
ormedoutof
there.Hedr
oveawaysof ast
."
"
Yoh!Yourl
i
fei
samov
ieshamesweet
hear
t.
"
"
Iknowr
ight
?'
"
Ver
ymuch.Mypat
ienti
sher
e.By
ebabe.Lov
eyou.
"
"
Lov
eyou.
"
Wedropt
hecal
landIgetbackt
ocooki
ngwhi
l
e
l
ist
eni
ngt
omusic.

NKOSI
NATHI
Ijustcamebackf r
om soccert
rai
ningandI'
m
exhausted.Iopenmyapartmentandleavethedoor
openf orf
reshair
.It
sOctoberanditi
scrazyhot!I
throwmybagont hefl
oorandlayonmybed.It ook
ashoweraftertr
aini
ngsoIclosemyeyes.Myphone
goesoffandItakeitoutofmypocket
.It
san
I
nstagr
am notif
icati
on.
'
MandaWav
es21i
sli
ve.
'
ThatsAmandasuser nameonI nstagram.Icl i
ckoni t
andherf acecomest oshow.She' slaughingat
somet hing.Thecamer amov esandt hatsimpni gga
ofherscomest odisplay.Thingsdi dn'tworkout
betweenussowedeci dedt omov eon.Sheseems
happywi ththisnewguyofher s.AboAmanda
bayajola.Whodat esaniggawi tht woearpi er
cings
andanosepi er
cing?Nxai !Ilogoutandt hrowmy
phoneonmybed.Ist andupandgocl osemydoor
andtur nont heairconditioner.Iwi shIcouldr ol
l a
j
ointandsmokebutI 'mt ryi
ngoutf orSundownssoI
hadtoqui t.Itextoneofmyboot ycallstocome.The
i
deaofanot herniggat appingTj i
napot raisdrivi
ng
mecr azy .Irespectherr elati
onshi pbutshecan' tlet
thatniggasmashMYpussy .Wer eall
ytri
edmaki ng
i
twor kbutwebot hagreedt hatwej ustmett ooear l
y.
I'
m stil
lgoi ngt omar r
yhert hou.She' smine.
LANGA
Idr
iveof
fwi
thNkany
ezi
andLami
fight
ing.
"
Khuzway
o!"
,Nkany
ezi
.
"
Baba!
",Lami
.
"St
opitmanyout
wo!Lami
leav
ethechi
l
dal
one!
",I
shoutatt
hem.
"
It
smyphonet
hou.
",Lami
.
"
Bor
rowhi
m."
Heexhalesandlaysbackontheseat .Sanel
el aughs
shakinghi
shead.Hisusedtotheirfr
equentfighting.
Iam not!I
tsannoy
ing!Ipar
kinthev i
sitor
spar ki
ng.I
seehercatwalkoutthebui
ldi
ng.I'mt r
eati
ngher
quit
egood.She'st
hickandglowing.Sheget sinthe
carandpecksmyl i
ps.
"
Euw!
",Lami
.
"
Hay
isuka!Unj
ani
sthandwasami
?",
Uny
ezi
.
"I
'
m okay/I'
m gr
eatmama!
",meandNkany
ezi
say
si
multaneousl
y.
OhIf
orgothi
sal
soherst
handwa.Thi
schi
l
dis
t
aki
ngupmyspace.Uny
ezi
laughs.
"Ki
ds.Y'
al
l r
eadyfort
heweekendwi
thAunt
Thando?"
,Unyezi
.
"
Weal
way
sready
!/Yes!
/Al
way
s!"
,theyexcl
aim.
Idr
iveoffasNkany
ezit
ell
shi
smot
herabout
car
toons.Thi
sonecantal
k!
"
RightKhuzway
o?"
,Nkany
ezi
.
"
Yeahson.
"
Idi
dn'
tev
enhearwhathewast
alki
ngabout
.
"
I'
mtelli
ngyoumama!IwantaPJMasksbedr
oom
t
oo."
,Nkany
ezi.
"YouhadaSpongebobdecodonemont
hs
ago."
,Uny
ezi
.
That
sal
readyano.
"
Yeahbut
-"
"
NoNkanyezi
.Wher
ear
ewesupposedt
ogett
he
money
?",
Unyezi
.
She'
ssost
ingysomet
imes.Idon'
tev
enwantt
oget
i
nvol
ved.
"
Daddy
?",
Nkany
ezi
.
NowI'
m Daddy
?Il
ookathi
smom andshegi
vesme
aney
e.Icl
earmyt
hroat
.
"
Son.Yourmot
heri
sri
ght
."
Andthecr
yingbegi
ns.One!Two!Asswhoopi
ng!
ThankGodIboughttheAvanza.
"
Myphone!
",Lami
shout
s.
"Aaaaaaaaaaah!
",Nkany
ezi
scr
eamsashi
smot
her
slapshisass.
"OuchNkanyezi
!"
,Saneleshout
swhenNkanyezi
kickshi
m whenhistr
yingtorunawayf
rom hi
s
mot her
.
Ialr
eadyhav
eaheadache.I'
m gl
adUnyezii
sn'
t
pregnant
.We'
renotr
eadyforanot
herchi
ld.
"
MaGema.Yek'
ingane.
"(Leav
ethechi
l
dal
one.
)
Shel
et'
shi
m gocl
i
cki
nghert
ongue.
"
Ungal
i
ngeukhal
e!"(
Dontev
endar
ecr
y.)
,Uny
ezi
.
"Don'
tcryson.MaGemauy ekeukushay aiyingane
zam.Zololokhubowushay
auNkosi nathieguge
kangaka.
"(Stophi
tt
ingmychildren.Recentlyyou
werehitt
ingNkosi
nathi
whilehissool d.)
"
Khuzwayo.Don'
ttel
lmehowtorai
semykids.
Uney
inganewena?"(
Doyouhaveki
ds?
),Uny
ezi
.
"
Sor
ryMkami
."
Ipar
kout
sidethegat
e.Thandowavesatusasthe
ki
dsrunt
oher.Nkanyezi
isalr
eadysni
tchi
ng.
"
Unyezi!Whyarey
ouhi
tt
ingmynephew?
",sheasks
wal
kingcloser
.
"
Het
hinkshi
sawhi
techi
l
d."
,Uny
ezi
.
Wesayourgoodby
esanddr
iveof
f.
"MaGema.Yek'
ukushay
aiy
ingane.
"(St
ophi
tt
ingt
he
ki
ds.)
"
Uney
inganeKhuzway
o?"(
Doy
ouhav
eki
ds?
)
"
Wat
chy
ourt
oneMkami
."
Shethr
owsagl anceatmeandtakesouther
ear
phones.She'
sangry.I
'
m sur
eifshecouldshe'
d
beatmyassaswel
l
.Shel
ookst
ir
edt
odaysoIdr
ive
tomyShisany
amai
nKwaMashu.

TSHEGO
IwinceasIsi tdownont hebenchatt hebusst op.
Khulekani di
danumberonmey est
erday .Inoti
cehis
carappr oachingandIdr eadstandingup.Hepar ksi
n
fr
ontofmer evvinghi
scarcr eati
ngunnecessar y
dust.Showof f
.Thekidsf r
om campusar el ooki
ngat
hi
m.They 'r
eusedt ohim.Heenj oystheat tenti
on.I
standupandgr oanasapai nshoot sthroughoutmy
abdomen.Heopenst hedoorfrom theinsideandI
getinsi
dewi ncingasIsitdown.I '
vehadal ongand
painfulday.
"
Sawubona.
"(hel
l
o.)
Inodmyheadandhegr
ipsmyt
high.
"
Sawubona.
"(Hel
l
o.)
"
Dumel
a."
Hesmi
l
esandpout
shi
sli
ps.Ij
ustl
ookathi
m.
"
Myki
ssMaThengo.
"
"
I'
mti
red.
"
"
Hai
bo.
"
Hepar
kst
hecarneart
her
oad.Hel
ooksatme.
"TellmeSeho.Af
teral
lthepuni
shmentsexyou
receivedwhenar
eyougoingtolear
ntofi
xyour
atti
tude?"
"
Whatat
ti
tude?
"
Hel
ooksatmef
rowni
ng.
"
Hai
bonj
aloSpur
aMal
uda.
"
Ir
oll
myey
esandhesl
apsmyt
highl
i
ght
ly.
"
Didn'
tIt
ell
youaboutr
oll
i
ngy
ourey
esatme?
"
Idon'
tanswerhi
m causi
nghi
mtochuckl
e.
"
MaThengo.Who'
sthemanher
e?"
"
You.
"
"
Who'
sthepenet
rat
or?
"
"
You.
"
"
Who'sthepr
ovi
der?Theprotect
or?Thehead?
Umaquzuubani
la?
"(Who'stheboss?)
"
You.
"
"Thanstopfi
ghti
ngmef ordominance.AslongasI
penetrat
eyoungekengi
zwengawe.Kant iubani
onesendephakathi
kwethu?"(
Iwon'tbecontrol
l
ed
byy ou.Whohasball
sbetweenus?)
"
Nguwe.
"(You.
)
MyZul
uisget
ti
ngbet
ter
.
"IhopeIwon'thav
et ofucksomesenseint
oy ou
againngobaIdon'tmind.Wit
hyourat
tit
udeyou'r
e
sti
llgoingtobeweari
ngmyswagpant stoschool
l
impi ng."
Inodandheki
ssesme.
"
Nowhowaboutawarm bat
hwhenyougethome
whi
l
eImakeyousomethi
ngtoeat
?"
"
I'
dappr
eci
atet
hat
."
"
Okay
.You'
resl
eepi
ngov
erkeh.
"
Hest artstheengineagainandwe'rebacki
nt he
road.Ireallyt
rygett
ingmyat t
it
udeincheckbutmy
mout hhasami ndofitsown.Irestbackonthechai
r
andsi gh.Nowonderev eryonealwayscompl
ai ns
aboutZul
umen.Ial
sohav
east
oryt
otel
laboutt
his
ShakaZul
uofmine.

NOXOLO
"
Thandobet
ternotbr
ingt
hatscumbagofher
stoour
weddi
ng!
"
Ndabenkhul
ujustgott
hefi
l
eonSthembisoandit
doesn'
tseem good.Hei
ssopi
ssedoffr
ightnow.
"
Shedoesn'
tknowr
ight
?"
"No.Abloodyr
api
st?!Awhol
efuckenr
api
st?
!And
hisdat
ingmysist
er?
!"
I
'
venev
erseenhim soangr
y.Ij
ustgot
hrought
he
f
il
ewhi
lehepacesaround.
"DoesLangaknowt
hathi
sthesameguywho.
..
you
knowhiswife?
"
"
Idon'
tknow.I
fhi
sathomet
hanheal
readyknows.
"
"
Thi
ssobad!
"
Ir
eadov
eragai
n.
"Hadbeenconv ictedforrape,statutor
yr ape,sexual
harassment,
il
legal por
nogr aphyandphy sicalabuse.
Inoneofhiscasesaf ri
endwhowasal sof acinga
caseforrapewi t
hahi gherchar gesaidt hatt hiswas
notthei
rfir
sttimegangr aping.Apparent l
yi tstar
ted
attheorphanagehomewi thagi r
l cal
l
ed
Unyezi(
surnamenotgr anted)whowasn' tt r
aceable
whenpol i
cetri
edf indi
ngher .Afterherhesai dmany
fol
lowedleavi
ng' X' markedont heirbodies.Af ew
gir
lswerefound,thoumanyhaddi edduet osui ci
de.
"
Thissosick!Everythi
ngwasher e.Thenamesof
everygi
rlhi
sev ertakenpar
tofr apingwasthere.His
rel
easedate.Everythi
ng!Evenhisbl oodt
ype.This
resour
cesur eknowshi swork.Iclosethefi
l
eas
Ndabenkhuludrinkshiswhisky.Hisphonerings.
"
It
sLanga.
"
"
Answeri
t.
"
Heanswersexit
ingandIsigh.Thandoshoul
d'v
e
stay
edwithOzocausewhat sabouttogodowni s
gonnabebloodbathandshedoesn'twantherl
ove
fort
hisguymakinghergetinvol
ved.I
'v
eneverknew
Unyezi
sstorybutthere'
sonl
yoneUnyeziI
'v
eever
known.Iwipemyt earsandsni
ff
.Womangot hr
ough
alot
.Thisj
ustt r
igger
edme.Ndabenkhul
ucomes
backandnoticesmecr yi
ng.
"
Sdudl
asami
."
Heengul
fsmei
nhi
sbi
gar
msandki
ssesmyhead.
"
Whatdi
dLangasay
?"
"
Hedoesn'
tknowasy
et.Myguessi
shi
snothome.
"
Webot
hsi
ghi
nrel
i
ef.
"
Whatnow?
"
"
Wej
ustwai
t.
"
Inodandl
aymyheadonhi
schest
.
"
You'
reokaySdudl
a?"
"
Yeah.I
'
mjustabi
t.
..
"
"
Tri
gger
ed?
"
Inod.
"I
tsunder
standabl
e.Wheni
syourphot
oshootwi
th
Tshego?"
"Nal
edysaidshe'
l
lcont
actus.She'
sagr
eat
phot
ographer.
"
"
Isawherwebsi
te.Beaut
if
ul.
"
"
Ican'
twai
t.
"
"
Sdudl
a."
"
Mmmmh?
"
"
I'
m hungr
y."
"
You'
resuchababy
."
Ipeckshi
sli
psandstandgetofthebarstool
.Hesits
downasImakesomet hingf
orus.Saneleisnever
hereonweekends.Maybeweshouldgivehim ali
tt
le
brot
herorsi
ster
.
62
NOXOLO
"
Y'al
ll
ookssof
uckencut
e!"
,Uny
ezi
.
"
Mostdef
."
,Thando.
They
'r
esit
ti
nginonthephot
oshoot
.It
'sf
orpl
us
si
zedpeopl
e.Nal
edyist
hephotogr
apher
.
"
Ifeel
sosexyr
ightnow.
",Tshego.
"
Youar
e!"
,Uny
ezi
.
"Makelovetothecameraladi
es!Yes!Showmet he
booty.YesTshego!GoodNoxolo!AhPerfect
!"
,
Naledy.
MeandTshegochangeposesasNal
edyt
akes
pi
ctur
escont
inuousl
y.

AMANDA
"
Youcan'
tcomeSandi
l
e."
"
Why
?"
"
It
sforf
ri
endsandf
ami
l
y."
"
It
sbecauseoft
hatexofy
our
s.Angi
musabi
!"
"
ButIcan'
tcomewi
thy
ouathi
sownbi
rt
hdaypar
ty.
"
"
Yazi
niv
ayaAmanda.
"
Hest andsupandt akeshi scarkey sandphonet han
l
eav es.Idon'tev enrunaf terhim.If i
nishmyf ood
andpayt hebi l
l.Iknowhel ef
tmebehi ndsoIj ust
decideonbuy i
nganout fi
tforNkosi nathi'
sbirthday
party.IseeSandi l
etalkingwi t
ht hatexofhi s.Guess
hedi dn'
tleav e.Ipasst hem andwal kintoMr Price.
WhenIseet hem ent erIrollmyey es.Hi str
yingt o
makemej ealous.Thegi r
lcan'tkeepherhandst o
herselfandI '
m notmov ed.
"
Stopst
ari
ngatt
hem.
"
Ij
umpatt
hev
oiceandt
urnar
ound.
"
HeyTj
i
napot
ra.
"
Igul
pandsmil
eabit.Doeshehav etol
ooksogood?
Hehasabunchofhoodiesinhisarm.Hisphysi
que
i
sappeasi
ngandIcan'thel
psizi
nghim upfora
whil
e.Ohmygosh!Hesmel l
ssogood!
"
Amanda.
"
Irol
lmyeyesatthev
oice.Sandi
lewrapshisarm
aroundmywaist
.Nkosinat
hichuckl
esshakinghi
s
head.
"
Yahsani
."
,Nkosi
nat
hi.
Sandi
l
elooksathi
m upanddownandl
ooksatme.
"
Let
'sgetgoi
ngbabe.
"
Babe?Wher
eisy
ourexChar
li
e?
"I
'
llseeyouaroundTj
i
napot
ra.Nawecheese
boy."
,Nkosi
nathi
.
Nkosinathiwal
ksawaywit
hhi
sonebr
acketand
chucklesandmumbles.
"
Whatasi
mp.
",Nkosi
nat
hi.
Sandil
ecl
i
ckshi
stongueandr
emov
eshi
sar
m
aroundme.
"
Let
'sgo.
"
"
I'
ll
cat
chanuber
."
Ileavehi
m standi
ngther
eandpickoutafewitems.I
requestanuberwhil
ewalki
ngout.Ist
andoutside
forawhilebefor
eaBlackSUVparksinfr
ontofme.
Sbhamusmi l
esatmeandIj umpinnextto
Nkosinat
hi.Icancelmyr
ide.We'rebot
honour
phones.Thesilencei
scomfortabl
e.Ir
ecei
veatt
ext
fr
om Sandile.
"
Cany
ousl
eepov
ert
oday
?"
"
No.Ihav
eanassi
gnmentt
ofi
nish.
"
"
Cool
."
"
Yeah.
"
Sbhamudropsmef i
rstandIwavegoodby
eatt hem.
Thegat
eisopenedforme.Igreett
hesecuri
tyand
geti
nsi
dethehouse.
"
Sawubonama.
",Igr
eetSi
nenhl
anhl
a'
snanny
.
"
Yebomt
anam.
"
She'
sinherl
atefor
ti
esandst il
lver
ybeauti
ful
.Iwalk
upst
air
stomyr oom andstri
pnaked.Inoti
cethe
dampnessonmypant ies.Nkosi
nathi
!Ij
umpintothe
shower.
UNYEZI
"
Who'
sri
dingwi
thme?
",Iaskgr
abbi
ngmybag.
"
Me!
",TshegoandNoxol
osay
.
"
Sthei
sfet
chi
ngme.
",Thando.
Myey
etwi
tchesandwenod.
"
ByeNana!
",wet
ell
Nal
edy
.
"By
e."
,Nal
edy
.
Weexchangehugsandwal kout.Thandohugsus
andwal kstoawhi tePoloGTI.Iseehim sit
ti
ngon
thedr i
versseat .Hegetsouttoopent hedoorf or
Thandoandgr eetsus.Wedon'tgreetback.Ourey es
meetandIf eel al
ltheangeri
nmer esurf
ace.When
Langat oldmet hatThandoisdati
ngt hatscumbagI
didntbeli
evei tbutnowher eheisandIf eelli
ke
strangli
nghim.Noxol ohol
dsmyhandasIam about
topulloutmygun.
"
We'
rei
napubl
i
cspaceNy
ezi
."
,Noxol
o.
Inodandwegetintomycar.Therideissi
lentasI
dropever
yoneoff
.Noxol
oisthelasttogetoff.She
l
ooksatmef orawhil
e.
"
It
sgoi
ngt
obeokay
.Ital
way
sdoes.
",Noxol
o.
Inodandsheget
sout.Thedr
ivehomei slongand
sl
ow.Iparkmycarandwalki
nside.Langaismaki
ng
asandwich.
"
Mkami
."
It
urnar
oundandhenot
icest
het
ear
s.
"
What
'swr
ong?
"
Hewal
ksupt
omeandengul
fsme.
"
Isawhi
m."
"
Him?
"
"
Yes.
"
Ihearhi
m sighandhisholdti
ghtensaroundme.
Fl
ashbacks.Mykneesstarttowobblebuthepicks
meup.I'm nowcryi
ngloudly
.Ifeell
ikepuki
ngasI
smellhi
sscent.

THANDO
"
Sot
hosear
eyoursi
ster
s?"
Hest
eal
sagl
anceatmeandIsmi
l
e.
"
Yes.Noti
cedt
heey
econt
actbet
weeny
ouand
Uny
ezi.
"
"
Who?
"
Inoticehowhewi peshisf oreheadandt i
ghtenshis
fi
nger sar oundt hesteeringwheel .Ijustkeepqui et
andt hinkingaboutal lthewomenhi shur t.I
'
v e
knownf ormont hsbutI'venev erknewhowt odeal
withit.Wehav en'
tbeensexual ev ersincewest art
ed
dati
ngbutIknowhehassev eral cougar s.AllIknow
i
sIhav et oel i
minatehim soonernowsi nceUny ezi
hasseenhi m.Hewasn' tev ensupposedt obet her
e
soear ly!Wegetoutoft hecarandwal kinsi
dewi th
himt extingonhi sphone.Heheadsf orthef ri
dge
andIt akeof fmyheal s.Ilookatmy selfont hemi r
ror
againstt hewal l
.Youcandot his!It akeoutmygun
hidi
ngi tbehi ndmyback.I 'vewentt hrought hi
s
multiplet i
mes.Icandot his!Het urnsar oundsmi l
i
ng
downatme.Ipul lhiminf oraki ssswal l
owingt he
bil
e.Heeasesusont het i
l
edki t
chenf loorandI
cl
osemyey esshoot i
nghi m onhi sside.
"
Aaaaaah!
"
Ipushhim of fmeandshootmyf ootandletouta
l
oudscr eam.Ikickthegunawayf r
om bothofus
andIstar tt
eari
ngupmycl ot
hes.Ilaymyback
agai
nstt hestoveashelooksatmebl eedi
ng.
"
Youbi
tch!
"
"Yout
houghyoucoul
dplayme?Youhur
twomen
andyouthi
nkyouwoul
dgetawaywit
hit
?"
IfeelmyangerfuelupandIt akeakni f
e.Hehol ds
myf ootandIstabhishand.Irepeatedlyst abhim
evenwhenIheart hesi
rens!Thedoori ski ckeddown
butIcarryonstabbi
ngknowingv erywel lhei sdead.
Handswr aparoundmel i
ft
ingmeup.Il etoutal oud
scream cover
ingmyears.Ican'tseepr oper l
ydueto
myangerbutIcanf eelmanypr esencesar oundt he
house.
"
Sedat
eher
!"
If
eelapri
ckonmyneckandmyscr
eamsdi
edown
asIf
all
int
ounconsci
ousness.
OZO
Thandossecurit
ycompanyal er
tedmeabout
gunshots.Idr
ivetherei
nspeed,get
ti
ngati
cketon
theway.Iparkandt hei
risabodycover
edwitha
sil
verbag.
"
No!Thando!
"
Igetoutmycarandwal ktowardsbutIcan'
tpass
the'
cri
mescene'.Herbrother
scomeoutoft he
houseandwhent heyseemet heytel
lthem t
oletme
i
n.Iwalkovert
ot hem andgreet.
"
Wher
eisThando?
"
Theykeepqui
etf
orawhi
l
eandsi
gh.
"
Isshe-
?",
Iask.
"No!She'
ssedatedandonherwayt
othe
hospit
al.
",
Khul
ekani
.
"
Whathappened?
"
"Shehadaf i
ghtwi
tht
hatscumbag.Sheki
l
led
him."
,Khul
ekani
.
Weal
lwal
koutandst
andnearmycar
.Langat
akes
outapaperf
rom hi
swai
standhandsi
ttome.
"Guesssheknewaf t
eral
l.Iknowf
orsur
esheki
l
led
him pur
posel
y.
",Langa.
"
Hav
ey'
al
lfoundal
awy
er?
"
"
Dadi
soni
t.
",Ndabenkhul
u.
Inodandt
hrowt
hef
il
einsi
demycar
.Thi
sisamess.
"Whywer
ey'
al
ldr
aggi
ngy
'al
lfeetonel
i
minat
ing
him?"
"
Wecoul
dn'
tj
ustkil
lhi
m.Oursisterl
ovedhi
m.Or
t
hat
swhatwethought
."
,Bheki
khaya.
"
Thi
sisamess.Thandomi
ghtgot
ojai
l
."
"Shewon'
t.Shemightgetsenttoahospi
ce.Wej
ust
havetowaitf
orherstatementbefor
ewestar
t
comingupwithaplan."
,Ndabenkhul
u.
"
Letmedr
ivet
othehospi
tal
."
TheynodandNdabenkhul
upat
smyshoul
der
.
"
Thanky
ouf
orl
ovi
ngher
."
Inodandgeti
ntomycar
.Idr
iveof
ftr
yingt
ocome
upwi
thasensi
bleexpl
anat
iont
owhathappened.

NKOSI
NATHI
Aknockdist
urbsmef r
om my35pushup.Istandup
grabbi
ngatowelwi
pingmyf ace.Iopent
hedoorand
fi
ndAmandawi t
hthekids.
"
Uhhey
."
"Hey.AuntThandoisi
nhospi
talandthewhol
e
familyi
supandabout.Nkanyezi
wascr y
ingf
oryou
soIaskedthedriv
ertodr
iveushere.
",
shesays
withoutbr
eathi
ng.
"
Breat
heManda.
",Isaysmi
l
ing.
SheexhalesandIlett
hem in.I'
m sogladIboughta
2bedroom apart
ment.Nkany ezii
scl
ingi
ngontomy
l
eg.Il
ifthisheav
yassupwhi leAmandat akesa
sl
eepi
ngSnet ot
heguestroom.
"
Bhut
i.
",Sanel
e.
"
Sho.
"
"
Canwechanget
hechannel
?",
Sanel
e.
"
Yeahboy
."
Ihandthem theremot
eandtakeNkanyeziwit
hme
totheguestroom.Hefell
asl
eep.Il
ayhim down
nexttoSne.Amandathrowsafl
eeceoverthem.We
walkout.
"
Sisi
.Ngi
cel
aukudl
a."
(cani
hav
efood)
,Lami
.
"
Okayst
handwa.
"
Shestart
sbywashi ngthedishesinthesi
nk.Iwas
goi
ngt odothoselater
.Shelooksinthefri
dgeandis
metbymydi etfood.Sheshakesherheadandt akes
outthemeatfrom thedeepf r
eezerbendi
ng.Ican'
t
hel
pbutt ol
ookatherass.It akeoutabottl
eof
waterandtakeaseatont hebarstool.
"
Canyoupl
easemakesandwi
chesf
ort
hoset
wo
whi
l
eIcook?"
Ij
ustcar
ryonr
unni
ngmyey
esdownherbody
.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi!
"
"
Ohsor
ry.Yeah?
"
"Pl
easemakesandwi
chesf
orLami
andSanewhi
l
eI
cook?"
"
Yeahnopr
obl
em.
"
Ist
andupandst artt
akingouti
ngr
edi
ent
s.I
'
llaskher
l
ateraboutAuntThando.

UNYEZI
Wehavebeenwai t
ingout
sideherwardandnoone
hascomet oseeus.Weseeadoct orappr
oachi
ng
andIgetoutofLangasembrace.
"
Doct
or.Thandol
wet
huKhuzway
o.I
ssheokay
?"
Hel
ooksathi
sfi
l
e.
"MsKhuzway
oissti
lli
ntheat
re.Herl
egwasal
most
shotof
fsowe'r
etr
yingasmuchaswecan."
Inodandheleavesusther
e.Theboysgetoutfor
anot
hersmoke.PoorOzohasbeensitt
ingther
ewith
hi
sheadbetweenhisknees.Noxol
opull
smy
tr
embli
ngbodytoherandshushesme.Khuzway o
andNanawalkin.
"
Imett
heboy
sout
side.She'
l
lbeokay
.",
Khuzway
o.
Whoi
shet
ryi
ngt
oconv
ince?Hel
ooksl
i
kehe
doesn'
tbeliev
ewhathissayinghimself.Thandohas
beenthroughalotal
ready!Naledysit
snexttous
andsighs.Shewipesbloodthattri
ckl
esdownher
nose.
"
Nana?
",Khuzway
o.
"I
'
m okay.Therei
salotofabandonedspir
it
shere.
Thei
rpresencesar
equit
eheav yonme.",
Naledy
.
Kuhl
etakesoutati
ssueandhandi
ttoher
.We
remai
nwaiti
ngforsomenewsonThando.
63
OZO
Langahandsmeacupofcof feeandItakeit
thankinghim.We' vebeenhereal lni
ght
.Shegotout
oftheat r
ereallylatebutwestillcoul
dn'
tseeher.
Theyt ookt heladieshomey esterdayni
ghtandthey
arri
vedear l
yi nthemor ni
ngwi thsomef ood.I
couldn'teveneat .Adoctorwal kstowar
dsussmi l
ing
andweal lstandup.
"
Thandol
wet
huKhuzway
o?"
Weal
lnod.
"Shewokeupanhourago.Herf ooti
sgoingtoheal
butit'
l
ltaketi
me.I'l
lal
lowonlyonepersont
ogosee
her.She'sunderpol
icecust
ody."
9
Weal
ll
ookatherandLangacl
i
ckshi
stongue.
"Havey ouseenhowbigthi
sfamil
yis?Andyou'r
e
onlyall
owingoneperson?Udaki
we!Asi
kucel
ifuthi
asambeni .
"(
you'
redr
unk!We'r
enotaski
ngyou!Lets
go!),
Langa.
"
Siri
t'
spr
otoco-
"
"I
t'
sokayma' am.Youhavetounder
standwe'
real
l
agit
ated.Sbusi
so.
",Khuzway
o.
Il
ookupathi
m.
"
Youcangoi
n.Tel
lherweal
lher
e."
,Khuzway
o.
Idon'tthi
nkitsagoodideabutt
hatdoesn'
tst
opmy
feetf
r om walki
ngbehi
ndthedoctor
.Wegreetthe
poli
ceof f
icerst
andi
ngnexttoherdoor
.
"45mi
nut
es."
,doct
or.
Inodandopent hedoor
,sl
owly.Itakeadeepbreath
i
n.Ourey esmeetandhertear
sf all
.Inot
iceone
handishandcuffedt
othebed.Isitonachairnextt
o
herbed.Shelooksatme.
"
Ozo/
Thando.
",webot
hsay
.
"
Goahead.
",It
ell
her
.
"
I'
m sor
ry.
"
"
Forwhat
?"
"
Leav
ingy
oul
i
ket
hat
.Itwasal
lpar
toft
hepl
an.
"
"
Whatpl
an?
"
"Icouldn'
tl
ethim goawaywithwhathedi
dtoUnyezi
.
Allthosegir
ls.Icoul
dn'
t.Hedeser
vedt
odiesoI
plannedallt
his."
Sheinhalesandwipeshert
ears.Myhandhol
dsher
handinvolunt
ari
l
y.Shesqueezesi
t.
"
Youmi
ghtgot
ojai
lfort
hisThando.
"
"Iwon't
.Iwillsayhewasbeat i
ngmeupandt ry
ingto
forcehimselfonmeandIgr abbedmyhandbag
causingmygunt ofal
l.Igrabbeditandhesawi t.We
foughtfort
hegunshoot ingmyf oot.Ikneedhi
mi n
thegutsandt ookthegunandshothi m.Hewasst il
l
ali
veandgr abbedmyf ootsoIpulledaknifei
npure
adrenal
ineandst abbedhi m."
Ir
emai
nqui
etf
orawhi
l
e.
"
How-
?"
"IknewIhadt oshootatcl
oserangesoitcanbe
mor ebeli
evabl
e.Hediedwithabonersothatwi
ll
alsohelp.
"
"
Buty
oushoul
d'
vel
ety
ourbr
other
shandl
eit
."
"
Theydr
aggedt
hei
rfeet
."
"
But
-"
"
No!Idi
dwhatIhadt
odo!I
'
m awomant
oo!
"
"
Okay
.Rel
ax.Hav
edr
anky
ourpi
l
ls?
"
Sheshakesherhead.
"I
'l
lgofet
chthem andcomeback.Juststi
cktothi
s
story
.YourDadi
sget t
ingy
outhebestlawyeri
n
town."
"
Okay
."
"
Doy
ouneedany
thi
ng?
"
"
Food,
toi
l
etr
iesandmyphone.
"
"
Okay
.I'
l
lgot
ell
ever
yoneout
side.
"
"
Ever
yone?
"
"
Yourbr
other
sandt
hei
rwi
ves.
"
"
Okay
."
Ist
andupandheadf
ort
hedoor
.
"
Ozo.
"
Ihal
tinmyst
epsandl
ookather
.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
SodoI
."
Iwal
koutandwal
ktot
hewai
ti
ngar
ea.
"
Issheokay
?",
Langa
"
Shehasn'
ttakenherpi
l
ls.Sheal
soneedst
oil
etr
ies,
f
oodandherphone."
"
Didshesayany
thi
ngabout
..
.?
",
Khuzway
o
"Yeah.I'
ll
telly
'al
l
.Sheseemstohavei
tall
covered.
She'slookingatthr
eemonthsi
fherl
awyerisgood
oray ear.
"
"
Idon'
twantherinsi
de.She'
snotf
itf
or
t
hat.
",
Khuzwayo
"
Weal
lagr
ee.Wewi
l
lmakeapl
an.
",Khul
ekani
.
Inodandtakeali
ftdownst
airs.Thandoshoul
d'
ve
l
eftt
hiswholet
hingtoherbrother
s.Shedidamessy
j
ob!Amessyone!

NKOSI
NATHI
It
ri
edcal
l
ingMom agai
nandshef
inal
l
ypi
ckedup.
"
Ist
il
ldon'
tunder
standwhyIwasn'
ti
nfor
med.
"
"
Sorr
yson.Wewer
ejustshockedanddi
dn'
thav
e
t
ime.
"
"I
t'
sokay.Thekidshavebeenaski ngwherear
ey '
al
l.
WorseNkany eziandSnenhl
anhla.Theyhavebeen
cryi
ng.Ithi
nktheycansensethatsomethingi
s
wrong."
"
Iknowbaby
.We'
l
lpassbyandf
etcht
hem.
"
"
Okay
.Lov
eyou.
"
"
Lov
eyou.
"
Igocheckupont heki
dsonemor et
ime.Igotomy
room andfi
ndAmandaasleep.It
akeachangeof
clot
hingandti
ptoeout.
Af
termyshowerIwal
koutt
obr
eakf
ast
.
"
Goodmor
ning.
"
"
Hey
.Sl
eptgood?
"
"Myneckiski
ndasor
e.Mysof
aisn'
tdesi
gnedt
obe
slepton.
"
"
Sor
ry.
"
"
No.I
t'
sokay
.What
'dy
oumake?
"
"
Notmuch.Omel
ets.
"
"
Letmegowaket
hoser
ascal
sup.
"
"
Letmegoshower
."
Inodatherandmov eoutherway.IrubmyneckasI
walktotheguestroom.IsleptonthecouchcauseI
didn'
ttr
ustmyself
.

LANGA
Il
ookatheragai
nandshe'
sst
il
lzonedout
.She
l
ookssoti
red.
"
MaGema.
"
Shedoesn'
trespond.
"
Uny
ezi
!"
Shet
urnst
owar
dsme.
"
Arey
ouokay
?"
"
Notr
eal
l
y.PassbyNkosi
nat
hisowecanf
etcht
he
ki
ds.
"
"
No.Youneedt
orest
.I'
l
ltal
ktohi
m."
"
Thanky
ou.
"
Thi
sThandot hi
ngi
sreal
l
ycl
awi
ngather
.Ihopeshe
doesn'
trel
apse.

NOXOLO
Iwarm somel eft
oversf
orusandgoj oi
nNdabeon
thesofa.Ihandhim aspoonandwest arteat
ing
sil
entl
y.Imissmysonandhedoesn' tli
kestaying
withus.Hehasmov edi
nwithUnyeziandv i
sit
sus.
Hesay sweal waysbusyandhegetsboredalone.
"
Babe.
"
"
Sdudl
a."
"
Iwast
hinki
ng-
"
"
What
everi
tisy
ouwantbabe.Iagr
ee.
"
Thi
sonet
hinkshi
ssmar
t.Thi
sact
ual
l
yser
ious.
"
Soy
ouagr
eet
hatwecancel
theengagement
?"
Hesi
tsupandput
shi
sspoondownf
rowni
ng.
"
No.
"
Ilaughathi
m andheput
sthepl
ateont
hecof
fee
table.Her
eachesf
ormeandti
ckl
esme.
"
Ndabenkhul
u!"
"
Cancel
?Whopr
oposed?Nev
er!
"
"
Okay
!Okay
!I'
m goi
ngt
ofar
t!St
op!
"
Hest
opst
ickl
i
ngmeandwebot
hlaugh.
"
Sowhatwer
eyout
hinki
ng?
"
"
ThatIgetof
fthepi
l
l.
"
Helooksatmef orawhi
leandt
akesoffhi
sbeani
e
andbrusheshisbal
dhead.Hel
ookedgoodwit
h
wavesbutbaldsuit
shi
m more.
"
Liket
ryf
orababy
?"
"
Yeah.
"
Hekeepsqui
etagai
nandsi
ghs.
"
Baby.It
hinkSaneleisj
ustfi
neforus.I
'
veal
way
s
want
edonechild.IhaveSanel
e.Anheir
."
"Butdon'ty
ouwanttofeel
theki
cks?Thej
oywhen
youholdhimf ort
hef
ir
stti
me?Thenappychangi
ng?
Everyt
hing?"
"Honestly
?No.Ababyneedst i
me.I'
m al
way s
working.Ihardl
yevenhavetimeforus.Plusyou'
re
sti
ll
wor ki
ngonhav i
ngbranchesacrossthecountry
.
Webot hhardlyhaveti
mef orSanel
e.Idon'tt
hink
we'r
er eadyforanot
herchi
ld."
"
Ohokay
."
Itaketheplat
eandstandup.Ididn'
texpectthi
s
conversat
iontotakesuchatur
n.Iam abithurt.I
wantedkidswithhim.Ial
wayswant edalotofkids.I
feelhi
shandsengulfmef r
om behind.
"
Sdudl
a.Don'
ttakei
tper
sonal
."
"
It
'sokay
."
Heki
ssesmyneckandmybodyr
eact
sinv
olunt
ari
l
y.
"
Wehav
e..
.togogetr
eadyf
ort
hehospi
tal
."
"
They
'l
lsur
viv
e."
Hepull
sdownmyt
ightsreveal
i
ngmyt
hong
swal
l
owedbymybuttcheeks.
TSHEGO
Il
ookathim ashelight sanotherci
garet
te.Iknow
hi
si npai
nbecausehi ssisteri
sinhospitalbuthis
pissi
ngmeof f
.Isnor tandsneeze.Heknowsmy
si
nusesactupwhenhesmokesi nsi
de.Iopent he
windowsandsprayt hehouse.Hegoesaheadand
carri
esonsmoking.
"
Khul
ekani
."
Hel
i
ftshi
sey
esatme,
whi
l
ebl
owi
ngsomesmoke.
"Celauyobhemel
akont
le.
"(Pl
easegosmoke
outside.
)
"
Yikwam l
abMal
uda.
"(Thi
sismypl
ace.
)
Isighandsi
tnextt
ohi
m wav
ingmyhandt
ocl
ear
thesmoke.
"
Youar
en'
tmaki
ngy
our
sel
fsi
ckbutmeaswel
l
."
Heswi
tchesi
tof
fandl
ayshi
sheadonmyt
highs.
"Yazimysi
sterisnotcutoutf
orpri
son.Shewon'
t
survi
vei
nthere.Ifeel
sohopeless.
"
"
Shewi
l
lbesentt
oahospi
ce.
"
"St
il
l.Shecan'
tgobackther
e.Shewasdoingso
good.She'sbeenthr
oughalotal
ready
.Iwi
shMom
wasal i
vesometimesmaybeli
fewouldbedi
ff
erent
."
Imassagehisheadwi t
hmyfinger
sunt
ilhef
all
s
asl
eep.Isi
ghbeforelayi
nghi
sheadonthecouch
andthr
owingafleeceoverhi
m.
64
MONTHSLATER
UNYEZI
Ir
ubbedmyt empl
eandsi
ghedasIsataheav
il
y
pr
egnantThando.
"Hejustwant
stoseey
ouThando.You'
rebei
ng
sel
fi
sh."
Sheshakesherheadandbr
ushesherbel
l
y.
"
Hecantseemel
i
ket
his.Hecant
..
."
"
Whynot?It
shischi
l
dri
ght
?Lethi
m knowhe'
sgoi
ng
t
obeafather.
"
"
Whati
fhedoesn'
t-
"
"Hayi.Idon'tgetwhyyou'react
ingli
kethis!Stop
overt
hinking!Thatmanl ovesyou.Hehasbeen
pati
ence.I t
sbeen4mont hswithyouinher eand
you'r
e7mont hspr
egnant.He'l
ldothemat h.Youwil
l
beouti naf ewweeksandy oucan'
tleavethispl
ace
withallthesesecret
s."
Shewi
pedat
earandnodded.Shewasv
erychubby
andl
i
ght
erduet
oherpr
egnancy
.
"Can'tbel
i
eveyouhadsexwi
thhi
m whi
l
ethat
bastardwasn'
tget
ti
ng.
"
"
Uny
ezi
."
,shesay
sshamef
ull
y.
Il
aughandshakemyhead.Myphoner
ings
di
stur
bingusandi
t'
sLanga.
"
It
syourbr
other
.I'
l
lvi
sitagai
nbabe.Besaf
e."
Ikisshercheekandt
ummyt
hanwal
koutanswer
ing
thephone.
"
MaGema.
"
"
Khuzway
o."
"
Kudal
angi
kushay
elauci
ngo.
"(
Ivebeencal
l
ing.
)
"
Sor
rybabe.Iwaswi
thThando.What
swr
ong?
"
"Lamii
sint
roubl
eatschool
.IsThandoandt
hebaby
okay?
"
"
They
'r
efi
ne.Lami
?Tr
oubl
e?Whathappened?
"
"Hegoti
ntoafight
.Hebeatupawhi t
ekidandwe
knowhowt hi
sisgonnaend.Justhur
ryt
ohisschool
.
We'
rewai
ti
ngf
ory
ou.
"
Idropthecallanddriveoutoftheasy l
um confused
andangry.Lami hasnevergotteninaf i
ghtbefore.
Hei sasweetheart.Hechoset obeatawhi t
ekid
nakhona?!Idonthav eti
mef orcourtcasesmina!
ThankGodi twasmydayof ftoday.Iam goingto
whipLami '
sass.Hecan' tgoaroundbeingVanDam!

AMANDA
Isighedinrel
iefasIsawtheonelineonthe
pregnancytestandthrewi
tinthedustbi
n.Itext
Sandile"
itcameoutnegativ
e."andgetintheshower
.
Aft
ermyshowerIgetdr
essedandlazearound.Si
s
Kuhl
ebar
gesinmyr oom andt
hrowshersel
fonmy
bed.
"
Final
l
yhei
sasl
eep!
"
Il
aughatherandshesmacksmeal
i
ttl
e.
"
Anypl
anst
oday
?"
"
No.Why
?"
"
Cany
ougot
othemal
lforme?
"
Igr
oanandshemakesherpuppyey
es.
"
Whatdoy
ouwantf
rom t
hemal
l
?"
"
Af ewnappiesandusualbabyst
uff
.Bheki
khay
ahas
alatemeet
ingandcan'tgo.
"
Ididn'
tf eelli
kegoingany wheretoday !Inodandshe
smi l
eshandi ngmehercar d.Iforgetshe'sri
ch
somet imeswi thhowhumbl eshei s.TheNedbank
blackcar dhasheri ni
ti
alsoni t
.Istanaqueen.Many
thinkshei sdependantonSbar ibutshei san
i
nv estorandashar eholderinbi gsuccesf ul
compani es.Iwanttobejustlikeher .Bemyown
queen.
"
Youhav
ecl
assest
omor
row?
"
"
Yeah.08h00am-
11h40am.
"
"Wewi ll
gov i
sitt
herent
sgrav
eaf tery
ourclasses.
NaledysaysMom andDadar eSine'sguardi
an
angels.Apperant
lyt
hatswhyhisroom iscool
erthan
anyroom inthehouse."
"
Woah.Thatki
disbl
essed.
"
Wekeepqui
etandshechuckl
es.
"
What
sfunny
?"
"
Imi
sst
hem y
ouknow.
"
"
Met
oosi
s.Met
oo.
"
Wel
aytherelooki
ngatmypai
ntedcei
l
ingand
r
emi
ninsce.

KARI
SHMA
"
What
swr
ong?
"
Il
ookupatKhuzway
oandhesmi
l
es.
"
Nothi
ng.Justsensi
ngahear
tbr
okensoul
.It
s
wei
ghi
ngmedown.I mtryi
ngtol
ocatei
t.
"
Henodsandkeepsqui etsoIcanconnectwit
hmy
spi
ri
tual
being.Ist
andupandgot othet
eenageboy
att
hecorneroftherestuarant
.Ist
andoverhi
m and
hel
ooksupwi thti
redey es.
"
Hey
."
"
Heyma'
am.
"
"
Mind?
"
Heshakeshi
sheadandIt
akeaseatopposi
tehi
m.
"
Im Kar
ishma.
"
"
Boi
kgany
o."
"Beauti
fulname.Beingar apevict
imisnoty ourfaul
t.
Icanfeelyourdisgust,
shame,hurtandanger.Iknow
you'r
equest i
oni
ngy ourexist
enceandf eel
li
kedeat h
i
st heonlywayout .Doyouwantt odieanangr ysoul?
Soy oucanr oam t
hisearthangryandlost?"
Heshakeshishead.I
m sogl
adhei
slet
ti
ngmet
alk
wi
thoutaski
ngmanyquesti
ons.
"You' r
escar edt hatifpeopleknowt heywi l
llaughat
you.Youhav edi stancedyourselffrom others.You're
i
ntr overtedwi tht hefearofthem seei ngthroughy ou.
Rightnowy ou'reaty ourl
owestpoi ntinl
ifeandf eel
asi fGodhasabandonedy ouandl ifedoesn'thav e
meani ngany mor ebuthav ey ouev erthoughtt hat
may bey ourrapei swhatshoul dmoul dyouand
strenght eny ourf ait
hinGod." Ishallneverforsaketh
you. "andhehasnt .Yourfathercan'trestpeacef ul
ly
causey ou'r
ehol di ngontohim andwheny ouweep
andscr eam inpainhet r
iestocomf orty oubuty our
angerpusheshi m away .Hecantpr ot ecty ouwhen
you'r
eal soangryathi m.Tel ly
ourmot herwhaty our
stepfatherhasbeendoi ng.She'l
l l
i
st enandhel pyou.
Shelov esy ouandi tpainsheeseei ngy oudist ached
fr
om ev eryone.Shet hinksyou'reangr yather .There
i
snoexcusef orhurti
ngpeopl ewheny ou'rehur ti
ng.
Askingf orhelpdoesn'tmakey ouweak.Takea
standofy ourownl i
fe.Fightsohar dt hatev ent he
devilcantfightback.You' r
eabl essedki d.It
sapi ty
youhav et ogot hr
ought hi
sfory out obeabl et oheal
others."
Hebreaksouti
ntoaloudsobandIinchcl
oserto
hi
m hugginghi
m.Ilethi
m crywi
thever
yonelooki
ng
atus.Hecalmsdowneventual
ly
.
"
Whatar
eyou?
"
"
ASpi
ri
tual
Bei
ng.
"
"Thankyouf
ort
hat.Iv
ebeenbat t
li
ngwi
ththi
sissue
eversi
ncemystepfatherst
art
edsodomi
zi
ngme. "
"I
t'
ll
getbet
ter.Iseeabri
ghtfut
ureaheadofy
ou.
Youwill
healheartsandt
ravelt
heworld.
"
"
ThankYou.
"
Ismi
leandbi
dhim goodby
e.Khuzway
olooksatme
whenIsi
tdown.
"
Let
sgohome.
"
Inodandhepacksourt hingsandcov er
st hebil
l.I
cryassoonasIset tl
einsidethecar.Ihatethispart
ofmygift.Iseepainfult
hingsandfeel t
hem.That
boyspainwassoi ntenseIhadt oholdmy selffr
om
ball
i
ngov erandscreaming.
"
It
sgoi
ngt
obeokaybabe.
"
Khuzway
oki
ssesmyt
empl
eandst
art
stheengi
ne.

LANGA
WhenUny eziwalksinshet hrowsherhandbagat
Lamiandhecat chesit.Thecaucasianpr i
nci
pal
l
ooksatherov erherglassesi nthe"sothi
siswher e
thevi
olentnatur
ecomef rom."andIchokea
l
aughter.Thewhiteboy sparentkeeponchecki ng
theboysfaceandshaki ngtheirheads.Unyezisit
s
downgl ar
ingatLami whoschi ll
ed.
"
GooddayMi
ss.
",
Pri
nci
pal
.
"
Mrs.
",
Uny
ezi
cor
rect
s.
"
Ohsor
ry.Mr
s."
,pr
inci
pal
.
"
WhywasIcal
l
edher
e?"
,Uny
ezi
.
"YoursonpunchedMrVanRiegt
eert
odayandbroke
hisnose.Iwantedtoaski
fev
ery
thi
ngisokayat
home? "
,pr
inci
pal.
"
Yeah.Ev
ery
thi
ngi
sfi
ne.
",
Uny
ezi
.
"
Yoursoni
svi
olent
!"
,t
hecaucasi
anmot
herscr
eams.
"Ungangikuphul
eli
il
izwi
sisi
."
(dontr
aisey
ourv
oice
atme.),Unyezi.
"
What
?",
boy
'smot
her
.
"Doy ouexpectmetoaccomodateyou?Iwil
lnotdo
thatsoIadv i
ceyougetatr
ansl
atorher
ereal
quick."
,Uny
ezi.
"
Iunder
standv
enacul
ar.
",
boy
'sf
ather
.
"Kuhl
e.Sonif
unamali
niforukushay
iwakwengane
yakho?"
(howmuchdoy al
lwantfor
damages?),
Unyezi
.
"Whydoyout hi
nkwewantmoney ?Wewanty
our
boyexpel
led.Hisadangert
othi
sschool
andi
ts
l
earner
s."
,boy'
sfat
her.
"
Kwenzakal
eni
vel
eLami
?"(
whathappened?
)
Lami
sit
sst
rai
ghtandcl
ear
shi
sthr
oat
.
"Joynerwashar
assi
ngthegi
rl
sintheclassli
ft
ing
thei
rskir
tsandr
ememberdady ousai
dt hatwas
wrongandIshouldki
ckaper
sonsassshoul dthey
dotgat?"
Icl
earmythr
oatuncomfort
ablyasUnyezigl
aresat
me.Ipr
obabl
yshouldn'
thavesaidasstoakid.
"Yousee?Thiswholefamil
yist
oxi
c.Themot
heri
s
alsovi
olentandr
atchet-
",
boysmot
her.
"What?Viol
ent
?Rat chet
?Mi na?Uny ezi
?I'
ll
stickt
his
si
xinchloui
svuitt
onheel i
ny ourbehindifyoudare
i
nsultmeagain.Sies!Nyat
chet?Mi na?Hehe!"
Idontknowwhyshei
ssowor
kedup.Ihol
dherhand
andsqueezei
t.
"
We'l
lpaywhateveramountneededfortheboys
medi
calvi
sit
s.Ya'l
lshoul
dteachyoursontorespect
woman.Hedeserv
editandmor e.Hissoyoungbut
cantr
espectawoman.Whatistobecomeofhi m
whenhe'sol
der
?Yall
rai
serapistsunawar
e."
Itakemysonandwifeandl
eav
ewi
tht
hem.Uny
ezi
hascalmeddown.Spi
tf
ir
e!

NDABENKHULU
Shedancestoasongplayi
ngonTraceandtwerks.I
l
aughatherasshesingsal
ong.Shedoesn'
teven
knowthely
rics.
"Wapwapwapwap!
",
Ithi
nkt
hat
stheonl
ypar
tshe
knows.
Itur
nofftheovenaft
ert
aki
ngoutthecupcakes.She
hasbeenteachi
ngmehowt obake.Icanbakebut
notasgoodasshedoes.Theysmellreal
l
ygood.
Shewalkstowardsandl
ooksatt
hem.
"
Theyl
ookgood.
"
Ismi
l
epr
oudl
yandsheki
ssesmycheek.
"
Let
sleav
ethem t
ocool
."
Inodandl
eavethem onthecool
i
ngr
ack.Theent
ir
e
housesmel
lsofbakedgoods.
"
You'
ref
etchi
ngSanel
etoday
?"
"
Yeah.Ihav
etobr
ingi
nhi
m andLami
'
svol
cano.
"
"
You'
redonewi
thi
t?"
"
Yeah.I
tsr
eal
l
yheav
y."
"
Youexagger
atedandmadei
thuger
ight
."
"
Im abi
gmanwi
thbi
gthi
ngswhol
i
kesbi
gthi
ngsi
n
l
i
fe.
"
"
Coul
dntagr
eemor
e."
Ismileandki ssher.Wehav en'tbeent hesameever
si
ncet hattal
kbutshe' str
y i
ngtopr etendshe'
sfi
ne
witheverythi
ng.Theki dstopicisj
ustnotf orme.I
wantki dsbutnotnowandIdon' tthinkshegetsit
.I
alwayswant edoneki dandIhav eonebutIhav eto
compr omisef orher
.
"
Howi
stheal
l
ergy
?"
Shescr
atcheshershoul
derandshr
ugs.
"
It
sabi
tit
chybutt
heant
ibi
oti
csar
ehel
ping.The
swel
l
inghasgonedown.
"
Inodandsmi
l
eather
.
"
Whyar eyousmil
i
ngl
i
ket
hat
?Whatar
eyouupt
o
Ndabenkhul
u?"
"I
mjustsmi
l
inghaibo.Whydoy
oual
way
sthi
nkI
m
uptosomet
hing.
"
"Iknowyou.Thel
astti
mey ousmil
edliket
hatRandy
deli
ver
edmyweddi ngdresshi
msel
f."
"
Youwer
ehappyt
hou?
"
"Iwas.Ohabouttheweddingthei
nvi
teshavebeen
i
ssued.AssoonasThandoi soutwe'
rehavi
ngher
dresstai
l
oredagaincauseshe'
sal
lchubbynow."
"
Icantbeli
eveshe'
spregnant
!Im st
il
lgoi
ngt
oki
l
l
Ozoforfucki
ngmysister
!"
"
Stopbei
ngdr
amat
ic!
"
Shesay sstandi
ngupandheadingt othekit
chen.I
canalreadyimagineherpr
egnant.Shewantsaki dI
'
ll
giv
eheraki d.If
ollowaft
erherandshei ssteal
i
ng
cupcakes.
"
Ngakubamba!
(caughty
ou!
)"
"
Arghpl
ease!
"
Igr
abacupcakeaswel
l.Wel
l,
theydot
ast
egood.
Notbet
tert
hanher
sbutgood.

NKOSI
NATHI
Ishootmyl astbi
tofcum inthecondom befor
e
pull
ingout.Iwipeherandgetup.Icleanupthe
condomsandt hr
owt hem away.Iheadfort
he
bathroom andoptforashower.
AftermyshowerIgetr eadyforsoccerpract
icewhi
l
e
sheshower s.Ipackmygearandmyshake.Wher e
aremysoccerboot s?Ahha.Ist uf
fthem int
hebag
andr unahandt hroughmyhai r.Shecomesout
al
readydr essedandt akesherstuff
.Ihandherafew
hundr ed.
"
Not
hanky
ou.
"
Ishr
ugandputthem backi
nmywal
l
et.Wewal
kout
andIlockup.
"
Wantal
i
ft?
"
"
Please.
"
Iopent
hedoorf
orherandrushtomysi
de.Mymom
cal
lswhi
lewear
estuckint
raff
ic.
"
Babe.
"
"St
handwa.Yourauntwi
l
lbeoutinaweekandwe
arepl
anni
ngawel comebackpar
tyforher
."
"
Uncl
eOzo?
"
"Guesshewi
l
lseeheratt
hepar
tyandherbaby
bump."
"
Thati
sabi
gsur
pri
se.
"
"
Tadaa!
"
Weshar
eal
aught
er.
"
Youhav
esoccerpr
act
icet
oday
?"
"
Yeah.
"
"
Makemepr
oud.
"
"Wehav easponsorf
rom Spai
ncomi
nginonour
pract
icethant
hebiggameonSunday.Ya'
l
lcomi
ng
ri
ght?"
"Youknowwewouldntmissi
tfort
hewor
ld.Your
uncl
esalr
eadybetonyou.
"
"
OhGodt
hepr
essur
e."
Wel aughandsayourgoodby es.Sandisi
weisj uston
herphone.Shei smyf uckbuddy .Wemett hrougha
fr
iendandi nstant
lyf
ucked.Shei snotdramat i
c.She
call
smewhensheneedsmeandIcal lherwhenI
needher .Idropheroffatr
esandshewav es
goodby e.Sheisagoodgi r
lwithadi r
tymind.Idr i
ve
offtowardsthestadium j
ammi ngt osomemusi c.

KHULEKANI
Tshegohasbeenst arvingher selfformont hsnow.
Shethi
nksIdon' tnoticehowsheal way sdoesnt
haveanappet i
te.Isawonsoci almedi atheyhave
beenbashingher .Shepost edapi ctur
eofmeand
heronmyy at
chandt hel adiesstartedcall
ingherfat
andunfi
tforme.Iwal ki ntoourr oom andshei s
dri
nki
ngthosewei ghtlosingpi l
lsagain.Shehasl ost
afewpundsbutnot hingdr ast i
c.Sheisnat ur
all
ybig
bonedandshedoesntwantt oacceptthat.Iputmy
pal
m nearhermout
handshel
ooksupt
ome.
"
Spi
tthem out
."
ShedoessoslowlyandIt
aketheent
ir
ebot
tl
eand
gofl
ushthem.Ifi
ndhercr
ying.
"
MaTengo.Doy
ouknowhowbeaut
if
uly
ouar
e?"
Sheshakesherhead.Isi
tnextt
oher
.
"Youarebeaut i
ful.Justbecausey ouar efatdoesnt
meany ouarenotat t
racti
ve.Ilovey ourtummyf at
andthickthi
ghs.Il ovehowt heyj i
ggle.Lordknows
yourstret
chmar ksgi vemeaboner .Lookatitri
ght
now.Icant r
ymaki ngyouf eelbetteraboutyoursel
f
butIcantdot hatifyoudont .You'reabeaut i
ful
woman.Beaut ycomesi ndi f
ferentshadesandsi zes.
Justbecausesoci etysaysy ouneedt oloseweight
doesntmeany ouhav etolisten.Entlekngayeiphone
yakho.
"(gi
mmey ourphone.)
ShehandsmeherphoneandIgot oheri
nstagram.I
postpict
uresofheri
nherbi ki
niwit
hthecapti
on
"FATneverlookedsogol
d."andt agmysel
f.Itake
myphoneandpostpi ct
uresofusandcapt i
oni t
"TrustmewhenIsayIwoul dntwantheranyfatter
."
Shecriessomemor eandcli
ngstome.Ilayuson
thebedandsheholdsontome.Idontgett he
j
ealousyotherf
emaleshaveonanother.I
tsthe
woment hatbashheronsocial
s.Toxi
cbitches.Iki
ss
herscaronherfor
ehead.
"
Ilov
eyouFat
-o.
"
"
Mxm.Il
ovey
out
oo.
"
Ichuckl
e.Shei
severyt
hingtomeandIhopeshewi
l
l
eatthemogoduIboughtfrom t
her
ankwit
hme
today.
Sponsor
edbyZanel
eNaMasi
l
elaKhangay
i.
65
BHEKI
KHAYA
"
I'
m notwear
ingasui
tPeaches.
"
"
Youar
e."
"ComeonePeach.It
sjustawel
comepart
y.Formy
sist
er.Apai
rofj
eansandgolft
shi
rtwi
l
ldo."
"
Cany
oubebecl
assyf
ort
oni
ghtonl
y?"
"
No.Iwearsui
tst
owor
k.Icantwearsui
tson
weekendsaswel
l
."
Shesighsandi
ronsmyj eansandgolft
shir
t.Iki
ss
hercheekandshecli
ckshertongue.Il
aughather
andwalkoutsi
nging.
"Phel
amajit
angisenhlanhl
enimina.Thol
amunt
u
ongakibal
elaamacala.Uhl
alekhona!"
"
Bheki
khay
a!Si
nei
ssl
eepi
ng!
"
Ikeepqui
etandsheshakesherheadandgoesback
tothel
aundryr
oom.Ishrugandgowakeupmyson.
Ifi
ndhim upal
readyupl
aughi
ngalone.Hi
sroom i
s
reall
ycool andchi l
l
edt hananyroom i
nt hehouse.I
pickhim upandt hrowhimintheaircausinghimt o
giggle.Hismot herisgoingtothi
nkIwokehi m up.I
got othest udywithhim bal
ancedonmychestwi th
myar m.Hei smaki ngbabysounds.Amandai s
alreadyatthepar ty.Sheist
heonecooki ngwith
Ndabenkhul u.Itakeaseatwi t
ht hi
soneonmyl ap.I
trywr i
ti
ngthepoem Iam supposet orecit
eandmy
creativej
uicesar edry.
"
Aaaahsi
shdbf
nfmf
j!
!"
,Si
nescr
eamsdi
stur
bingme.
"
Cany
ouwr
it
eapoem boy
?"
"
Shdgt
gBa-Ba-Baba!
"
Il
ookathi
m smi
l
ingandl
i
fthi
m up.
"
Comeagai
nboy
."
"
Baba!
",
hescr
eamscl
appi
nghi
shands.
Ir
undownst
air
swi
thhi
mtot
hel
aundr
yroom.
"
Peaches!
"
"
Yeah.
"
"
Hesai
d'Baba'
!
"
Shet
urnsar
oundandl
ooksatus.
"
Youwokehi
m up?Khay
a!"
"
Idi
dnt
!Hesai
dBaba"
"
What
?"
"
Sayi
tagai
nboy
.Sayi
tagai
n."
Hesti
ckshi
sfi
sti
nhi
smout
handsucksoni
t
l
aughi
ng.
"
VeryfunnyBheki
khay
a.Getdr
essedwe'
real
ready
l
ate.
"
"
Iswearhedi
dbabe.Comeonki
ddo.Comeon.
"
Heremainssilentlaughingandclappi
nghi
shands.
Ar
gh!Thisonet hou.Kuhl et
akeshimf r
om me
wi
pingthespitonhi m andhandsmemyi r
oned
cl
othes.Igetdressedrightther
e.

UNYEZI
Thepar
tisi
nourbacky
ard.We'
ret
heoneswi
th
manyki
dssoourbackyar
disbi
gger
.
"
Whosf
etchi
ngThando?
"
"
BabaandKar
ishma.
",
Langa.
"
HasOzoar
ri
ved?
"
"Yeah.Heishel
pingNkosi
nat
hiputupt
he
banner.
",
Langa.
"
Langa?
"
Hel
ooksatmewi
thasmi
l
e.
"Youhavebeenf
oll
owi
ngmear
oundal
lday
.What
didyoudo?"
"
Me?Idi
dntdoany
thi
ng.
"
Ithr
owhi
m al
ookandheadi
nsi
dewi
thhi
m onmy
tai
l.
"
Lami
!
"
"
Ma?
"
"
Wher
eisNkany
ezi
?"
Lami
looksatLangaandswal
l
ows.
"
Lami
.
"
"
Hei
sint
heki
tchen.
"
Iat
temptt
owal
ktot
heki
tchen.
"Wait
!Uhm.Mom canyouhel
pmel
ookf
ormy
phone?Yeahmyphone.
"
"
It
siny
ourpocketLami
."
IpushLangaawayandwal ktothekit
chenandfi
nd
thecakeonthefloorandNkany
eziinthemiddl
eof
themess.Ibreat
heinandtakeoffmyf l
opsbut
Langaholdsmyhand.
"
Anot
heronei
sont
heway
."
"Khuzwayoweren'
tyout
heonesupposetomake
sureyoursonstay
sawayfr
om t
hekitchen?
"
Hescr
atcheshi
sheadandnods.
"MaGema.Ei
sh.LamiIt
oldy
out
ocl
eant
hisupwhi
l
e
Ist
all
yourmother
."
"Me?Tryget
ti
ngcl
oset
hatcakewi
tht
hatki
d
eat
ing.
"
IgetnearandNkanyeziwail
sloudly.Hehascakeall
overhim andhestar
tsthr
owingitaround.Igrabhi
m
ki
ckingandscreaming.Heisgoingt obat
hagain.I
m
neartokil
li
ngLangasson!It
smi schiefaf
ter
mi
schi
efal
way
s!
"
Yal
ltwobet
tercl
eant
hatup.
"
"
ButMaGema-
"
"
Khuzway
opl
ease.
"
Il
eavethem ther
ecarr
yingacr
yingandsugarhi
gh
Nkanyezi
.It
sgoingtobealongday.

THANDO
Wear eatthegateandt henervesstartkicki
ngin.
Mybabybumpi svisi
bleinthi
st i
ghtbodyhuggi ng
dressUnyezichose.Iam metwi thabanner
"WelcomeHomeMomma! "andIblinktearsaway .I
getoutofthecarwi t
hDadshel p.Im carr
y i
ngtwins
somyt ummyi sbigfor7mont hs.Ihat eOzof or
doingthi
stome!Icanseehi m atthefarendoft he
yardonthephone.
"
Wel
come!
",
ever
ybodyscr
eams.
Heturnsaroundandhesmi l
esmeetingmyeyes
whi
cht ur
nsintoafr
ownwhenheseesmyt ummy .
Hesignal
swi t
hhisfi
ngerathimsel
fandInod.He
remainsstandingt hereforawhilebeforewalki
ng
towardsmesl owl y.Irememberwhenhecameatmy
houselivi
dandt i
psycr y
ingthatIbrokehisheart.He
hadpinnedmeagai nstthewallandkissedme
hungril
y.IcouldnthelpitbutIallowedittoconti
nue.
Wedi dntusepr otecti
on.Ifoundoutatt heasyl
um
thatIwaspr egnant.Inev ert
oldhim.Everyoneis
l
ookingatus.I macr y
ingmess.
"
Howf
aral
ongar
eyou?
"
"
7mont
hs.
"
"
But
-"
"
It
stwi
ns.
"
Hesmi
l
esnoddi
ng.
"
That
smygenes.
"
Inodandheput
shishandoni
t.Theki
dski
ckandhe
l
etshi
stear
sfal
l.
"
Whydi
dyoukeepi
tfr
om me?
"
"
I-
"icl
earmyt
hroat
.
"
Iwasscar
edandsel
fi
sh.It
houghty
ou-
"
"
Leav
eit
.Noneedt
oexpl
ainnow.
"
Hekissesmeandmyhor
monesactup.Amoan
escapesmyl
ips.
"
Voet
sekSbusi
so!
",
Langashout
s.
Wepulloutl
aughi
ng.Ev
eryonestart
swalking
towar
dsmeandhugsar eexchanged.Ihavelit
tl
e
Sinei
nmyarmswhenher eachesforhisfather.
"
Baba!
"
"
SeePeaches?
!It
oldy
ou!
",
Bheki
khay
a.
HetakesSinef
rom mesmil
ingandwalkst
ohi
swif
e
gl
oati
ng.Shesnevergoi
ngt
oheartheendofi
t.

AMANDA
Ir
ushinsi
detoturnofft
helambstewandIbump
i
ntoNkosi
nathi
.Heclencheshi
sjawandpassesby
.I
st
andtherel
ookingathi
m ashewalkst
hanhalt
sin
hi
sstep.
"
Howdi
dthatpr
egnancyt
estgo?
"
"
What
?"
Het
urnsar
oundandt
hel
ookhehasr
ightnow.
"
Howdi
dthepr
egnancyt
estgo?
"
"
Howdoy
ou?
"
"
Answerme.
"
"
Idontowey
ouanexpl
anat
ion.
"
Hechuckl
esandwalkstowar
dsme.Hecagesme
bet
weenhim andt
hesink.
"Amanda.Youwi l
lal
waysbemywoman.Just
becauseIml et
ti
ngyoufuckthatSandi
leguydoesnt
meany oudontanswermewhenIasky ou
something.Howdidthatpr
egnancytestgo?"
Ikeepqui
etandhi
sjawt
icks.
"
Negat
ive.I
tcameoutnegat
ive.
"
"Notonlyareyougivi
nghim mypussybuty
ou'
re
giv
ingittohimr awal
so.Ufunaukukhal
a
Amanda? "(
Doy ouwanttocry?)
Ishakemyheadv
igur
ousl
y.
"Good.I
fIev
erseey ouwiththatl
oseragai
nI'
llpul
l
upli
keahurri
cane.Iwil
lcausehavoc.Si
yezwana?"
Inod.
"
Khul
uma.
"(
tal
k)
"
Ngi
yakuzwaNkosi
nat
hi.(
Iheary
ou.
)"
Hesmil
esandpecksmyli
ps.Hesqueezesmyass
andImoan.Hest
il
lhast
hageff
ectonme.
"I
magineify
ouhadfel
lpr
egnantf
ort
hatf
ucker
.
You'
l
lonlycarr
ymychi
ldr
enAmanda.
"
HekissesmeandIhavetoadmi
tImi
ssedhi
sli
ps.I
sometimeswoul
dimagine
Sandil
eashim.Therei
ssomet
hingpul
l
ingusback
toeachotheral
lthet
ime.

NOXOLO
Ipukeagai ninthetoil
etandsi
tdownont het
il
ed
fl
oorrestingmybackagai nstt
hewal l
.Ihavebeen
feel
ingsicktheseday sandIwouldsayIam
pregnantbutwehav ebeenusingcondomssincethe
anti
bioti
csst oppedthebir
thcontr
olfr
om working.
Ndabenkhul uwalksinandhandsmeagl assof
water.
"
You'
reokaysdudl
a?"
"
Yeahj
ustdi
zzy
."
Hehel
psmest
andupandwal
ksmet
oaguestr
oom.
"
Laydown.I
'
llbr
ingy
ouf
oodl
ater
."
Inodclosi
ngmyey esasIf
eelt
hewor
ldspi
nni
ng.
ArghIprobabl
ycaughtt
hefl
u.

KARI
SHMA
I
m wit
htheki
dsandNkanyezi
isonasugarr
ush.I
hav
ebeenrunni
ngaf
terhi
m al
lday.
"
Aunt
ylook!
"
Hej umpsont hetr
ampoli
neandget
soffrunni
ng
pastguests.Hefal
lsandget
supfastandconti
nues
running.
"
Nkany
ezi
!"
Sanel
eandLamiar
ehelpi
ngmerunaft
erhi
m.He
bumpsint
ohismot
herandhesi
gnal
sforhert
otake
hi
m.
"
Takememama!
"
Shet
akeshi
m andput
shi
m onherwai
st.
"
Youwannasl
eep?
"
"
Heshakeshi
sheadandwigglesoutofherhol
d.He
r
unst
owardshisf
ather
sscreaming"Babas!
"
Hecal
l
sthem t
hat
.Hi
ssuchasnob.
Isi
ghasSanel
eandLami
fol
l
owhi
m.
"Pl
easepourmeagl
assofwi
necausey
oursoni
s
anothercase.
"
Uny
ezi
laughsandpour
smeagl
ass.
If
eelt
hehai
dsonmybackst
andupandIdr
opt
he
gl
ass.
"
Kar
ishma.
"
Il
ookatt
hedar
kfi
gur
epassi
ngby
.
"DearLord.I
fiti
snotyourwi
llt
hani
tshall
not
happen.Irebukeanycur
secastont
hisfamil
y.
Amen."
Uny
ezi
looksatmef
reakedout
.Amandagaspsand
hit
sherchestbef orecoll
apsingi
nNkosinat
hisar ms.
Everyoneisallovertheplacecal
li
ngambulances.
Nkosinathidr
ivesoffwithherinhi
ghspeed.She
wontdi ebutIneedtoalignmychakrasandpr ay.I
excusemy selfandaskKhuzway otodri
vemehome.
66
UNYEZI
Thandoagr eedtostoppi ngt heparty.Ev eryonewas
nowi nthehal l
waypaci ngwai ti
ngfort hedoct or
.
Kuhlewassi tt
inginthemi ddleofBheki sl egsont he
fl
oorwhohadhi sarmsar oundher .Shewas
shi
veringandcr yi
ng.Kar i
shmahasn' tret urnedsince
sheleft.Icouldfeelaheav ydarkpr esentar oundus.
Imayhav ehadmygi fttakenawaybutnotal lwas
l
ost.Mysi xt hsenseisst il
lheightened.Nkosi nathi
wast hef i
rsttostandupwhent hedoct or
approachedus.
"
AmandaSi
l
angwe?
"
"
Yes.
"
"
Fami
l
y?"
"
Yeah.Im hersi
sterandt
hey
'r
ear
emyi
n
l
aws."
,Kuhle.
"Shei
sheal
thy
.Seemsli
keshehadapanicatt
ack.
Weputheronsomedrugssoshecanrest
.Wewi l
l
assi
gnaspeci
ali
stf
orhert
ohelpwit
hthepani
c
at
tacks.
"
Weallnoddedandhelef
tusal
lther
e.Kar i
shmahas
al
ltheanswersweneedandshesti
llhasn'
tarr
ived.
"Let
sallgoandcleanup.I
'
llgot
otherecept
ionand
askthem t
ocalluswhensheisawake.
"
"
I'
ll
stayUny
ezi
."
,Kuhl
e.
"Iwasn'
taski
ngany
one.Wewil
lcomeback.
Standi
ngherwon'
tmakeany
thi
ngbett
er.
"
Itakemybagandt heyall
startmov i
ng.Wegeti
n
ourcarsandIwon'tl
ieIam confused.Kar
ishma
bettercomet
hrough.Myphoner ingsandLanga
handsi tt
ome.
"
Baba.
"
"
Ndodakazi
."
"
Konkekur
ight
?"
"
Kuhl
emnt
anam.I
sihl
ahl
asi
sihl
ebel
i
le.
"
Ir
oll
myey
esatt
hement
ionoft
het
ree.
"
YeboBaba.
"
"Kunesi
thaemundenini
.Si
funaukuzi ny egezel
a
kodwakukhonaomuv i
mbil
i.Uzogudl uzwa
l
owo. "
(t
hereisanenemyamongsty all.itwantst
obe
oneofy al
lbutonei
sstandi
ngi ntheirway .t
heywil
l
beremov ed.
)
"Akukabinazinkingaemdeni
nikodwa
sizoqhapel
a."(wedonthaveanyprobl
emsasy
etbut
wewi llbecautious.
)
"
Sal
ekahl
endodakazi
."
(bewel
ldaught
er)
"
Ubabi
ngel
eleekhay
a."
(gr
eett
hem athome.
)
Wedropthecal
landIl
aybackonthecar
seat
si
ghi
ng.Langat
hrowsacuri
ousl
ookatme.
"
What
sgoi
ngon?
"
"
Imt
ryi
ngt
ofi
gur
eitout
."
"I
tsgoi
ngt
obeokay
.Wej
ustneedt
obest
rongeri
n
pray
er.
"
"
Iagr
ee.
"
Iki
sshi
scheekandgobackt
omyseat
.
KUHLE
Bhekikhay
aparksinthedr i
veway .Heopenst hedoor
formeandhelpsmeout .I'
veranoutoft earsandI
am scaredandexhausted.IthoughtIwasgoi ngt o
l
oseherandIdoubtI '
llhandlethat.Wewal kinside
andIgocheckupont henanny .Wedroppedhi m of f
beforegoi
nggothehospi tal
.Hewaspeacef ull
y
sleepi
ngandIsatdownnextt ohiscot.Hisroom
wascal mi
ngandchill
ed.Iclosedmyey esandl aid
myheadonmyhands.
"God.Icomebef or
ey ouasadev ast
ateddaught
er.
Pleasebewi t
hmysi steri
nthesehardti
mes.Icant
l
oseher .Ineedher
.Shei sal
lIhave.I
-"
IletoutasobandIsuddenl
yfeelawarm embr ace.I
t
remindsmeofmymom.Iwi pemyt ear
s.Itakeoff
myshoesandcl i
mbont hesi
nglebedinSine'sbed
withwarmthsurr
oundi
ngme.

NKOSI
NATHI
Istopr
unni
ngbr
eathi
ngheav
il
y.Igr
eetBab'
Ngadi
at
thegat
eandwal
kin.Isi
tbyt
hestai
rswit
hmyhead
i
nbetweenmyhands.Myphoner
ingsandi
ts
Sandi
siwe.
"
Hey
."
"
Hey
."
"
Ssup?
"
"Iwaswonderi
ngify
oucoul
daccompanymeasmy
datetomysist
ersweddi
ng?
"
"
Stopwonder
ing.
"
"
Idonthav
eadat
e."
"You'r
einuni
ver
sit
yIm sur
etheydontexpecty
out
o
pullupwit
hadate."
"ButI
veal
readyt
oldt
hem Iam comi
ngwi
th
someone.
"
"
Taket
hatsomeonewi
th.
"
"
Imeanty
ou.
"
"Me?Ngathi
uzongiz
elangedr
amamanj e.Ar
eyou
catchi
ngf
eeli
ngs?
"(l
ooksli
keyou'
recomingwit
h
drama)
"
Imeany
oucantexpectmenott
o-"
"Ci
mal omafeel
ingskeh.Dontev
ercal
lme.
"(
getr
id
ofthosefeel
i
ngs)
Idr
opt
hecal
landcl
i
ckmyt
onguest
andi
ngup.
"
Nywewaswonder
ingny
weny
we!Tsek!
"
Irunupt
hestai
rst
il
lmyroom.Igeti
ntheshowerso
IcangocheckonAmanda.

THANDO
Iam eati
ngachaarandnandoschi
ll
isaucewi
th
bread.Ozoi
slookingatmeshaki
nghishead.
"
Wher
edi
dyouev
engetat
chaar
?"
"
Pleasel
eav
emeal
one!
"
"
Sor
ry.
"
Ireadt
het
extUny
ezi
sentassoonasmyphonei
s
on.
"
Amandai
sfi
ne.Shehadapani
cat
tack.
"
"
Asl
ongasshei
sokay
."
Inodwi
pingat
ear
.
"
Whyar
eyoucr
ying?
"
"
It
ssad.Didyouseehowscar
edshel
ooked?She
t
houghtshewasdying.
"
"
Shesgoi
ngt
obeokayt
hou.
"
Hesit
snextt
omeandIhav emissedhi
sscent
.I
cl
enchmythi
ghst
ogetherandacci
dent
lymoan.He
l
ooksatmeandbi
teshisli
p.
"
Wenzani
?"(
whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
)
Ii
gnorehi
m asIgr
abahol
dofhissemi har
ddick.I
ve
missedt
his!Hi
mtoobutmost
lythi
s!Icarr
assitunt
il
i
tshardandhehol
dsmyhand.
"
Wecanhav
esexwi
thouthur
ti
ngt
hebabyr
ight
?"
"
Asl
ongasy
ou'
regent
le.
"
Henodsandl
aysmedownont hecouchandunti
es
mygown.Igr
abhisdi
ckandleadittomyentr
ance.
Hegetst
hemessageandsl
owl ypusheshi
mselfi
n.
I
tsbeenawhil
e.
"
Sbusi
so!Aaah!
"
Hewai
tsf
ormetoadj
ustandhest
art
smov
ing.Idi
g
mynai
l
sinhi
sbackmoaning.

BHEKI
KHAYA
Ithrowafleeceov erherandki ssherforehead.She
didntsl
eepall ni
ghtcry i
nginthehospitalcorri
dor
.I
takethenowawakeSi neandgomakehi m some
food.Hismot herdeser vesabreak.Igi
v ehim hi
s
foodandheeat slaughing.
"
Baba!
"
Hecantr eall
yfeedhimselfbuthetri
es.Ieati
nf r
ont
ofhim ashel aughs.Theseboyhascheeks.The
houseissilentwithoutAmanda.She'dbecooking
wit
hhersi sterri
ghtnowmaki ngbreakf
ast.

KARI
SHMA
Istandupandgogetagl assofwater
.Iv
ebeen
prayi
ngforanswersbutIgett
hesameanswer
everyt
ime.Khuzwayoopensthedoorandpeeps
i
nside.
"
You'
redone?
"
"
Yeah.
"
"
Anyl
i
ght
?"
"
No.Not
hing.
"
"
Giv
eitt
ime.
"
Inodandfol
l
owbehindhi
m.Hehasbeenver
y
suppor
ti
veofmygi
ftandIappr
eci
atei
t.
67
MONTHSLATER
NKOSI
NATHI
Thesepast sfewmont hshavebeenhardonme.
Amandahasbeeni nandoutofhospi t
alsfi
ght
ung
forherli
fe.Shekeptonhav i
ngthesepanicatt
acks
whenIwasar ound.Sandi
siwehasalsobeenabug
i
nmyl i
fe.Ipi
ckupmyphoneanddi alAmanda.She
picksupont hethir
dring.
"
Babe.
"
"
Heybabe.Y'
al
lback?
"
"
Yeah.Thewaterwassocoldyetitbubbl
ed.I
t
houghtitwasanatur
alj
acuzzi
."
"
Howdi
ditgo?
"
"
Well.IswearIf
eltsomet
hingtouchmyl
eg!ButI
wasntall
owedtoopenmyey es."
"
Real
l
y?What
?!You'
reokay
?"
"
Yeah.I
m onl
yal
l
owedt
oseey
oui
nthr
eeday
s."
"
Iwi
l
lwai
t.
"
Wewer
esi
l
entf
orawhi
l
e.
"
Manda.
"
"
Nat
hi.
"
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyoubabe.
"
Wesaidourgoodby esanddropped.Igotchanged
andwentdownst ai
rstothegym.Ibumpedi nt
o
Sandi
siwe.Ipr
etendednottoseeher.
"
HeyNat
hi.
"
Istoppedonmyst eps.I
mv erycl
osetoki
ll
i
ngher
.I
turnaroundandassoonasourey esmeetshe
clutchesherchestandbreathesheav
il
y.
"
Sheshav
ingapani
cat
tack!
!"
Itr
yneari
ngandshefai
nts.Thi
siswhathappenedt
o
Amandaev er
yti
meshewaswi thme.Iwalkaway
andexitt
hegym.Ical
lmymot herwal
ki
ngintomy
apart
ment.
"
Mom!
"
"
Baby
.What
swr
ong?Yousoundemot
ional
."Mom.
I
mthepr
obl
em.I
m bewi
tched!
"
"
Nat
hi?What
?!"
Idropthecal
landwi
pemyey
es.Ideci
det
odo
pushupsandsit
ups.

UNYEZI
Il
ookatmyphoneconfused.I
sNkosi
nathi
drunk?
Langawal
kswhi
stl
ing.Hestopsandl
ooksatme.
"
What
swr
ong?Yougoty
our'
whatt
hehel
lface'
on.
"
"
It
sNathi
.Hesay
shi
sbewi
tched.What
sgoi
ngoni
n
t
hisf
amil
y?"
"
Let
sgo.
"
Hetakeshiscarkey
sandIfol
l
owbehindhim.I
s
Nathibacktosmoki
ngagai
n?CauseIswearIwi
ll
castr
atehim!!

KUHLEKONKE
Il
ookatherasshesl
eepsandsi
gh.I
m sogl
admy
parentsfoughtforher.Shef el
lvi
cti
mt owit
chcraft
andshewassupposedt odiebutIm gladmamaand
papaf ought.Whywoul dany onebewit
chanotherfor
aman?Si newalksinlaughingfoll
owedbyhisfather
andIshusht hem.Sineputsaf i
ngeronhismout h
gi
ggling.Ili
fthim up.
"
Get
ti
ngheav
ierf
ell
ow.
"
"
Im abi
gboy
!"
Il
aughandki
sshischeeks.Hecr
awl
soutofmy
ar
msandlaysnextt
ohisaunt.
"
Mama.
"
"
Yesboy
."
"
GrannyandPapal
ovey
ou.
"
IlookatBhekikhayaandheshr ugs.Weir
d.He
snugglesint
oAmandaandsi gnalswithhi
ssmall
handf orustoleave.Heissobossy .Weleav
ethem
tosleep.Bhekikhayal
if
tsmeupcausi ngmet o
squeal.
"
Wit
htheki
dsasl
eepIcanhav
emywi
fet
omy
sel
f!
"
Igi
ggl
eandhewal
kswi
thmei
nhi
sar
mst
oour
r
oom.

UNYEZI
Wefindhim sweatyandpant
ing.Helet
susi nand
of
fer
susdr i
nks.Hisfat
hercantevenwaitandgets
st
rai
ghttothepoint.
"Whatisi
t?Ngi
zwakuthiwauthiuthakathi
we.
I
mbangelakwalokhoyi
ni?"
(ihear
dy ousay i
ngy
ou'
re
bewit
ched.Whatsther
easonbehindt hat?
)
"Baba.RememberhowAmandaalwayshadpani
c
att
acksaroundmeandifIi
nchedcl
oseshe'
dfai
nt?
"
Webot
hnod.
"
Ithappenedagai
ntoday
..
."
ButIt
houghtAmandawasget
ti
ngcl
eansedt
oday
.
"
Notwi
thAmanda.Wi
thSandi
siwe.
"
"
Ubani
lowo?
"(whost
hat
?),
Langaasks.
"
It
sthi
sot
hergi
rlIhadsomet
hingwi
th.
"
Pr
obabl
ytheonebehi
ndAmandasat
tacks.
"Samet
hinghappenedt
ohert
oday
.It
hinkIneedt
o
goseeGogo.
"
"Bowubonakukul
ungelelokhondodanaenza
njal
o."
(i
fyouseethatf
itsondoso.)
"
Mom?
"
"
Yeahboy
."
Henodsandr ubshisface.I
m notgoi ngtotel
lhi
m
anythi
ngbuthebetterfi
ndoutf orhi
msel f
.Iki
sshis
headandhughi m.Mybabyboyi sgrowingupprett
y
fast
.Im happyI
mt hefi
rstpersonhecal l
swhenlif
e
getstough.
"You'
ref
etchi
ngyourbr
other
sfr
om school
right
?Me
andyourdaddyhaveameeti
ngdowntown.
"
"
Yeahmom.Theycansl
eepov
err
ight
?Imf
reet
his
weekend.
"
"Yeahbaby
.Im gl
ady
oudi
dn'
ttaket
hatAmer
ican
deal.
"
"
Im gl
adt
oo.
"
Il
ethi
m goandhi
sfat
herhugshi
m.
"
Ilov
eyouson.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oodad.
Theypul
lawayandaswewal
kout
.
"
Dad.
"
Langat
urnsback.
"
Hav
eIev
ermadey
oucr
y?"
Langasmi
l
es.
"Coupleoft
imesbutther
ewasthisoneti
me.Ihad
putabook,moneyandpenci
li
nfrontofyout
osee
whichpathyou'
dchooseinl
i
febutyoupushedall
them asi
deandranint
omehuggingme.Whatmade
mecr ywasIwasntevenanopt
ionbityoust
il
lchose
me."
Ismi l
ebli
nki
ngtear
saway.Whyhav eIneverhear
d
ofthis?Theyhugeachot
heronemor etimeandwe
l
eav e.AssoonaswegetinthecarIpinchLanga.
"
Ouch!
"
"
WhywasIonl
yhear
ingaboutt
hatt
oday
?"
"
Mkami
.Younev
erasked.
"
Ipi
nchhi
m agai
n.
"Ah!Ihardl
yshar
ethatwi
thpeopl
eact
ual
l
yI'
venev
er
shareditwit
hanyone.
"
Il
ookathi
m ashesecr
etl
ywi
pesat
ear
.Sweet
.I
ki
sshi
scheek.
"
You'
reagr
eatdad.Il
ovey
ou."
"
Ilov
eyousomuch.
"
Hedr
iveswi
thonehandast
heot
herhol
dsmi
ne.

KHULEKANI
"
Babe!
"
Shecomesoutofthebat
hroom nakedwi
pingher
hai
rwit
hatowel.
"
Ishoul
d'
vecomebackear
li
erbutIcanwor
kwi
th
t
his.
"
Iputmylaptopbagdownandtakeof
fmyshoes.I
stopwhatIam doi
ngwhenInoti
cehersi
tdownand
shewentfrom hav
ingf
ourr
oll
stothr
ee.
"
Babe.
"
"
Mmmhm.
"
"
You'
rest
il
ltaki
ngt
hosesl
i
mmi
ngpi
l
lsar
en'
tyou?
"
Sheshakesherhead.
"
Dontl
i
etomeSt
ufuza.
"
"
Im not
."
"
Standup.
"
Shest
andsupInoti
cehowsmall
hertummyi s.
Whatt
hefuck?Iwal
ktowar
dsherandpickherup.
"Thehel
l
?!You'
rel
i
ghtasf
uck!Wher
ear
ethose
pil
ls?
"
"
Whatpi
l
ls?
"
Iheadtowar
dherbagandshesnat chesitbef
oreI
do.Isnat
chitf
rom herandopeni
t.Itakeoutthose
pil
l
sandholdthem up.
"WhatdidIsaytoyouaboutthesepill
s?Hav eyou
thoughtaboutt
hesideef
fects?Ifyouwantt olose
weightgotothegym!Eathealt
hy !Nottakebloody
pil
ls!
"
"
I-
"
"
Youwhat
?Sel
fi
sh?
!"
Ishakemyheadandl eav eherst
andi
ngther
e.I
thr
owt hepil
lsint
hetrashcanandtakeabeerout
thefr
idge.Tshegoisgoingtodri
vemenuts!
68
KHULEKANI
IwalkintoTshegol
ooki
ngatherselfi
nthemirr
or.I
fel
tast i
nginmyheart
.Sheisr
eallygett
ingr
idof
thatbeauti
ful
body?Iwal
ktowardsherandstand
behindher.
"
Stuf
uza.
"
Shel
ooksupatme.
"
You'rel
ett
ingpeopledict
ateyourl
i
feandi
nthe
midstofi
tallIhav
et osuff
er.
"
"
I'
m abi
ggi
rl
."
"
Andy ou'
veal
waysbeenone.Ther
eisnot
hing
wrongwit
halit
tl
efat
."
"
ButIdontl
i
ket
hewayIl
ook.
"
"Thanchangeit
.Notusi
ngthosepi
ll
s.Comeon.Get
dressed.We'
regoi
ngtothegym."
"
Thegy
m?"
"
Yeah.Youwannal
osewei
ght
?Let
sgo!
'
Shenodsandheadsf orthecloset.Shecomesback
dressedinhert racksuitandt hey'
renotastightas
before.Isighandwal kaway .Sowher ewill
Ihold
ontowhenmyl ovehandl esar egone?Whatabout
me?Al lthattummygone.Idontwantasl ender
woman!Buti fIgottosacr if
icemyl oveforherbody
thancool .

BHEKI
KHAYA
Shesnoredli
ghtl
yandIclosedhermout
handnose
l
aughing.Shegaspedandopenedherey
es.She
punchedmewhi l
epanti
ng.
"
Iknewy
ouwannaki
l
lme.Sucki
tup.You'
rest
uck
wi
thme.
"
Webot hlaughed.Shegotoutofbedandwentto
fr
eshenup.Imadet hebedandtookoutanout
fitf
or
her.Ir
andownst ai
rsandthedri
veral
ert
edmet hey
wereready.
"
Wewi l
lbel
eav
ingsoon.Si
l
indeuMadam.
(we'
re
wai
ti
ngonmadam.)"
TheynodandIexcuset
hem.Shecomesdown
dressed.
"
Wow.
"
Sheturnsar
oundf orme.Okay.WhydidIchoose
thoseti
ghtj
eans?Thatass!Iclearmythr
oatasIget
astif
fi
e.Shelooksatmybonerandgi ggl
es.
"
Khay
a!"
"
Kuhl
e.Let
sgo.
"
"
Wher
ear
eyout
aki
ngmesoear
lyi
nthemor
ning?
"
"
Peaches.Asambe.
"(
let
'sgo.
)
"
Theki
ds.
"
"
They
'r
eatNat
his.
"
"
You-
"
"
Peach.Pl
ease.
"
"
Okayf
ine.
"
Final
l
y!Itakherwarm softhandinmineandkissit
l
ightl
y.Iopenthedoorforher.Shemustbegratef
ulI
boughthersneaker
salongcausei tgonnabealong
dayf
il
ledwi
thf
unandgames.

NATHI
Myapar t
mentisamess.Ipickupthet
oysonthe
fl
oorandstartcl
eani
ngup.Amandaisti
redsoItr
y
tokeepitdown.Wholef
tthefuckenmi
lkonthe
counter
?!
"
Nkany
ezi
!"
Ispi
llt
hespoil
tmil
kint
hesinkandwasht
hemi
l
kjar
.
Iref
il
landputi
tint
hefr
idge.
"
Whoat
emydi
etchi
cken?
!"
"
Lami
andSanel
e."
"
Im gonnaki
l
lthose-
"
"
Leav
etheki
dsal
one.
"
Amandapushesmeasidewi
thhercur
veandt
akes
j
uicef
rom t
hefri
dge.
"
Whendidyouwakeup?Thoughty
ou'
dbet
ir
edf
rom
l
astni
ght
."
"
Aft
ery
ousneakedout
.It
houghtsot
oo.
"
Shehandsmeagl
assofj
uice.
"
Thanky
ou.Donty
ouhav
ecl
assest
oday
?"
"Nope.ThankGod!Monday
sbor
emewor
seon
campus!"
"
IwishIwasyou.Ihav
epr act
iceat13h00andIam
t
ir
ed.We'r
epl
ayingagainstChief
sthi
sSundayand
wegott
abeready."
"
You'
dbepl
ayingagai
nstAr
gent
inaandt
hem i
fyou
wer
einAmer
ica."
"Yeahbutmyhomei shere.I
tsnotaboutt
hemoneyI
gotshit
loadsofthose.IwanttodowhatIlov
eand
sti
llbenearyou.
"
Shesmil
esandwalksi
ntomyar
msandl
aysher
headonmychest
.
"
Baby
."
"
Huh.
"
"
Who'
sSandi
siwe?
"
Icoughandshel
ooksupatme.Idr
inkmyj
uiceand
shef
oldsherar
ms.
"
Why
?"
"
Nkosi
nat
hi.
"
"
Uhm.
..
shewasoneof
..
.mhhm.
"
"
Mhhm?
"
"
Yeah.
"
"
Idontspeakhum.
"
"
Iknow.
"
"
Shewasoneofmy
..
.fl
oozi
es?
"
Sheshakesherheadandwal
kspastme.
"Thatwasbef
orewegotbackt
oget
herbabeI
swear!
"
"
Doyouknowwhatsheputmet
hro-
.Youknowwhat
?
What
ever
!"
Iwatchherasshebangst hebedroom doorbehi
nd
her.Whatjust
-?Igetbacktothekit
chentocook
breakf
ast.Coul
dn'tsheatl
eastfi
nishhersent
ence?
TSHEGO
Assoonaswewal kint
othegym Iam metwi t
h
womenwi thsi
xpacksandmuscularthi
ghs.
Ever
yonelooksatuswhenwestepin.Khulekanihas
mygandi nhi
sandIam gri
ppi
ngit.Onewhispersto
herf
riendwhenwepass.
"
Final
l
ysheconsider
slosi
ngaf
ew.Wasst
art
ingt
o
f
eelsorr
yfort
hathott
ie.
"
Khul
ekani
stopswal
ki
ngandIt
rypul
l
inghi
m.
"
Yout
hinky
ou'
reJanVanRebi
ecksdaught
erheh?
"
Thesl
i
m Caucasi
anwomanl
ooksathi
m.
"
Nowl i
stenher
eBeat r
iceshutt
hef
uckup.
Ngeshwapala.
(f
latass)"
"
Im notBeat
ri
ce.
"
"
Wel
lyoul
ookl
i
keone.
"
Hewalksawayandt hepoorwomani sembar rassed
andfur
ious.Khulekanicantshutupsomet i
mes.
Worsehedoesn'tlikewhitepeople.Hisv er
yracist
.
Hesaystheiraccentsannoytheshi toutofhim butI
thi
nkit
sbecauseofhi shighschool years.Thekids
usedtocal
lthem '
k@*$#&s'causet
heywer
ethe
onlybl
ackki
dsinthatschool
.
"
Okaybabe.Let
sst
artwi
thwar
m ups.
"
Wedoj umpi
ngjacksforaf
ewminutesunt
ilweget
di
stur
bedbythatl
adyandaver
ytal
lbuffman.
"
Ehbr
o."
OkayIdontl
i
ket
hataccentei
ther
.Khul
ekani
looks
upathim.
"
Yini
?"(
What
?)
Unyezi
steachi
ngs.Nev
eraccommodat
eawhi
te
per
son.
"Mywif
esay syou'
regi
vi
ngheri
ssues.Ar
ewegonna
haveanissuel
ad?"
"
Tsekwena.Ny
wif
eyamasi
mba.
"(
fucky
ou.Shi
tofa
wi
fe.
)
"
Whatbr
o?"
"
Sukandoda.Uzol
i
mal
a."
(mov
eman.y
ou'
l
lgethur
t.
)
"
Whathesayl
ady
?"
Hel
ooksatmeandIkeepast
rai
ghtf
ace.
"Hesaidmoveorhewi l
lki
ckyourass.Respectthe
manandputy ourbit
chontheleashFreddi
e",
thi
s
otherguywal
kupt ous.
Hehasaspot i
ethati
spositi
onedsideway
sonhi s
head.Hiswal
kexplai
nsthathisghett
oasfuck.
Neverseensuchghett
ointhesurbs.
"
Thi
sladi
sdi
srespect
ful
andr
aci
stbr
o."
"
Wel
lsucki
tupcauseheownst
hisgy
m."
It
rynott
oactsur
pri
sedbyt
his.Heownst
hisgy
m.
"
Notonl
ythisone.Ev
eryoneoft
hem ar
oundt
own.
AhKhul
enjayam."
Theyshoul
derbumpandhav
ethi
ssecr
ethandshake.
Theguyshoosthet
woaway.
"
Mandl
a.Mamasl
oSeho.Babe.Mandl
a."
"
Hi.
'
"
Seho?Gamal
i
phi
lel
o?"
(Whatnamei
sthat
?)
"Tshegoi
sthename.Sehoi
swhathepr
onouncesi
t
as."
"
Oh.Msot
ho?Wadl
aKhuzway
o!"
Theylaughandtheguyleav
es.Wegetbackto
exerci
sing.I
mreal
lyt
ir
edbutwontsayanyt
hingas
yet.

UNYEZI
Idi
gmynai lsdeeperintohisbackandIur gehim on
ashethrustsdeeperandfast er.Hehasmyl egson
hi
sshoulderspumpingi nmeandIf eelmyl egs
shakeandImoanl oudlyvibrati
ngwi t
htheur geto
cum.Ishedat earwhenIcum andhegr oans
shaki
ngasheshoot si nme.Hecol l
apsessweat y
andheavingonmel etti
ngmel egsgo.
"
Fuckbabe!
"
Il
aughandkisshi
sshoul
der
.Her
oll
sofmeand
pul
lsmeclosert
ohim.Ir
unmyfi
nger
ti
psonhi
sski
n.
"
Mawabo.
"
"
Khuzway
o."
"
Iwaswonder
ingi
fwecangoonav acat
ion?Just
y
ouandme.Ourboysar
egrownnow."
Inodsmil
ingandhesmi
lesbackki
ssi
ngme.He
getsont
opofmeagain.
"
Nowcomel
etmegi
vey
ouanot
herboy
."
Igi
ggleasIf eelhi
m gethardagai
n.Wehav ebeen
tr
yingforanotherbaby.Iwantl
otsofkidsandhe
sharesthesamewi shes.IknowIjustgotmybody
backintoshapebutIcanbouncebackagai n.

THANDO
"SoI'
l
ltakehi
mfort
heweekend.Mymom mi
sses
him.I
tscool?
"
"Yeah.Hedoesn'tbreast
feednomor eandhisover3
mont hs.ButIthi
nkyourmothercancomeher e.She
canst ayaslongasshewant s.Icanthavemybaby
trav
elli
ngallthewaytoKwaNongoma. "
"
Eish.Thatsoundsf
airenough.Yousur
eabout
l
etti
ngmom st aywi
thyou?"
"I
tsf
ine.Igetl
onel
yatt
imessoshesgood
company."
"
IknowI
m har
dlyar
oundandal
lbut
-"
"
It
sfi
neOzo.
"
No.It
snotfi
nebutIm noti
nt hemoodt ogetint
oan
argumentwit
hhimri
ghtnow.Il ookathi
m ashis
phonechimesandhetakesitoutofhispocket.
"
Look.Igott
ogo.
"
Ir
oll
myey
es
"
Asal
way
s."
Hewal ksoutt exti
ngbackwhoev errextedhim back.
Nogoodby ekiss.Iwalkupst
arisandexer ci
seso
l
ongNengi issleepi
ng.Mybodyhast akendrasti
c
changesbuti tsgetti
ngback.Isti
llhavethe
stret
chmar ksonmyt ummyandboobs.Myboobs
aresaggybutIschedul edaboobj obsonowor ri
es.I
knowOzof indsmeunat tr
acti
ve.Hei scheati
ngIcan
feeli
t.Idontev enwannaknow.Acal lf
rom Noxolo
comest hrough.
"
Heymama.
"
"
Noks.
"
"
Whatar
eyouupt
o?"
"
Exer
cisi
ng.
"
"Yesgir
l!Lookt
heweddingphotoscamei ntoday
andIwillhandy'
al
lthem atl
unch.You'
recoming
ri
ght?
"
"Yeah.Ineedsomewine!Ij
ustst
opl
ed
breastf
reedi
ngandIwantsomebeverage.
"
"
Okayt
hangi
rl
."
ItextNengisnannytocomei
ntodayandgetbackt
o
tummyt wister
s.AfewmoreandIm done.
69
SEASONFI
NALE
6MONTHSLATER
THANDO
IpeekedinonNengi andLay conandIsmi leabi t.I
rememberwhenLay conwasst i
l
l inhospi t
al af
terI
gavebirt
ht othem andhi slungshadn' tfullyformed
bythen.Ispenthour sprayingforhi mt omakei t.He
spentthr
eemont hsinani ncubatorandIt hinkit
real
lyaff
ectedOzoaswel l
.Hewassodi st
antt hatI
actual
lythoughthewascheat ingt oonlyf i
ndout
thathehadpl annedapar tyformeandourchi ldren.I
arri
vedhomewi t
hLay coni nmyar msandwas
welcomedbyhi m withNengi i
nhi sarms.Myf ami ly
arewhatwecal lhypocri
tes,t
heywat chedmewhi ne
aboutmysuspi cionsanddi dn'ttellmei twas
becausehewaspl anningasur prisepar tythouIdi d
fi
nditcutetohav eapar tybutalsounnecessar y.
"
Babe!
!"
Il
ookupathi
m andheshakeshi
sheadsmi
l
ing.Thi
s
manisf
lawl
essl
ybeaut
if
ul!
"
You'
ret
hinki
ngaboutmear
en'
tyou?
"
Il
aughedandst
oodonmyt oeski
ssi
nghi
m.He
spankedmybut
tandsqueezedi
t.
"
Yourki
dsar
esl
eepi
ng?
"
"
Myki
ds?
"
"
Uhhuh!Theynaught
y!Idon'
thav
enaught
yki
ds.
"
"
Oho!OkayOzo!I
tsFi
ne-
o!"
"
Ah!Chi
neke!
"
IlaughasIpul
lhi
mtowardstheki
tchen.It
urnof
f
thestoveandl
ookathi
m ashedrinkswater
.Heis
j
ustwear i
nghi
sshor
tsandistopl
ess!
"Don'tl
ookatmel
i
ket
hat
.I'
l
lgety
oupr
egnant
again."
"Again?Notaf
terDadhadmyheadf
orhav
ing
chil
drenoutofwedlock!
"
Hesmi
l
esandkneel
sdowni
nfr
ontofme.
"
Whatar
eyoudoi
ng?
"
"
Proposi
ng.
"
"
What
?"
"
Wil
lyoumar
ryme?
"
"
You-wai
t.
..why
?"
"Thando!I'
m get
ti
ngner
vousher
eandmykneei
s
star
tingtohurt
!"
"
Okaysorrybutsaysomer
omant
icspeechandask
menicel
y.
"
Hest
andsupanddust
shiskneeandwal
ksaway.
What
?Hisangr
ynow?Ithoughthewasj
oki
ng.

UNYEZI
Ipi
ckupLakhesclothesandcleanaroundhisroom.
Fuck!Thi
schil
disgoingtomakemegr owoldbefore
myt i
mecomes!Argh!Nowondert hisroom smell
ed
sobad!Ithr
owhissocksinhisdustbinandwalkout.
"
Lakhe!
"
"
Mah!
"
"
Gof
etchNkany
ezi
we'
regoi
ngout
!"
Hecomesupandst
andsatt
hel
astst
air
s.
"
Wher
ear
ewegoi
ng?
"
"
Spur
."
"
Eishma.Leavemebehi
nd.Ihav
etogot
oskat
eci
ty
wi
ththegents.
"
Ilookathi m andshakemyheadandwal kaway
rubbingmyback.Thi sbabyisheav y.Iheadf ort
he
elevatorandgodown.Webui ltanewhousesi nce
I'
m pregnantandImadesur ethear chitecti sagood
one.Ist ar
tonbaki ngwhilecooki ngdumpl ingsand
beefcur ry.MaMkhi zewalksinandl ooksatmewi th
herfistsonherwai st.Shesmi lesandwal ksout
dial
ingonherphone.Ir ubmybackagai nanddeci de
togodomygar den.Mybacki sonf ire!Ist andup
passinganowbusywi thmypot sMaMkhi zesinging.
Iarchmybackont hecoldelev at
orwal landsi ghbut
thereliefdoesn'
tlast!It
akeashowerandashar p
painshoot sfrom myabdomenandIgr unt.
"
Baby
!!Baby
!!
"
What'
sLangadoi
ngher
esoear
ly?Iwal
koutwal
ki
ng
l
ikeapengui
n.
"
Ohshi
t!Yourwat
er!
"
Il
ookdownandmywat
erj
ustbr
oke!
"
Imi
nlabour
!!
"
Ist
artpani
cki
ngandhepani
csaswel
l
!
"
Thebag?
"
"
MaMkhi
zehasi
tdownst
air
s.Let
'sgo.
"
Ibal
ancemyselfwit
hhim andwewalkt
oget
her
.
Anot
hercont
racti
onhit
sandIbithi
sarm!
"
Ouch!
!"
Icarr
yonwal ki
ngj
usti
nmygown.Ineedt
osi
tdown!
Thisfuckenbabyi
saweekear
ly!
"
Aaaaaaah!
"
"
Igoty
ou!Let
'shur
ry.Yes.Ther
ewego.Br
eat
hei
n."
"
Shutup!
!"
Heshut
supandl
eadsmet
othecarwi
tht
hebagon
hi
sarm.

NKOSI
NATHI
Il
ookedatt
hepregnancytestandsighedinrel
ief
!I
wasscar
edforasecond.Idon'twantherpregnant
asyet
.Il
ookedatherassheat esomecake.
"Youneedt
ogetbackoncontr
acept
ive.Maybefi
nd
onethatwi
l
ltr
eatyoubet
tert
hantheotherone.
"
"
Yeah.Ihav
eanappoi
ntmentwi
tht
hedoct
oron
Wednesday
."
"
Comeher
e."
Shewal
kedov
ert
omeandsatont
opofme.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Iknow.Il
ovey
out
oo.
"
Shelay
sherheadonmyshoul
derandIwr
apmy
handsaroundher
e.
"
I'
mthi
nki
ngofst
art
ingmyownsoccert
eam.
"
Sher
aisesherheadandl
ooksatme.
"
Why
?"
"Il
ovesoccerbutthelasti
njur
yhadmet hi
nki
ng.
WhatifIgethurtr
ealbad?Idon'twanttobewalki
ng
aroundwit
hal i
mpal l
myl i
fe.Atleasthavi
ngmy
ownsoccerteam gi v
esmeachancet ost il
lbe
i
nvestedinsomet hi
ngt hatIl
oveplusIdon' twant
youtobealway snursingme.You' r
enotmywi f
ey et
andasmuchasIl oveitwheny out akecar eofme
butIdon'
twanty ougiv i
ngmewi f
elydutieswhiley ou
sti
llmygir
lf
riend.Iwanty out
or el
axandl etmet ake
careofyouli
keIdi dwhenIwasst i
lltr
yingt owiny ou
overfr
om thatass."
Shesmi l
esandkissesme.Il
iftherupandlayher
downont hecouch.Il
ookattheclockonthewall
.
I
t's16h57andhercurfewi
s18h00.Icouldmakeit
work.Myunclegaveheracurfewjusttospit
emet o
remindthatshe'
snotmywife.Evil
.Yes!
"
Aaah!
",
shemoansasIsl
i
dei
ntoher
.
ShescratchesmeasIgodeeper .Ihol
dherhands
aboveherheadwi thonehand.She'
sgoingt
opayfor
rai
singhervoiceatmeearli
er.
"
Nkosi
nat
hi!
"
It
hrustdeeperandshebit
esmyshoulderbl
ade.
Thathurt
sbutI'
m highonsexual
adr
enali
n.
NDABENKHULU
Il
ookatherasshesl
eeps.Isi
tther
eandwatchher
sl
eep.She'
l
lbeupsoon.Shesnif
fsandopenher
smil
ing.
"
Hey
."
Shewav esandst andsupgoi ngt othebathroom.I
heartheshowerr unning.It
hinkshej ust
remember edthatshe'sangryatme.Isi gh.Istr
ip
andwal kt
ot hebathroom.Shei sunderthe
showerheadwi t
hwat ergushi ngdownherbeaut i
ful
body.IgetabonerwhenIt racemyey esdownher
stret
chnar
ks.Iwal kinandst andbehindher.She
takesadeepbr eathe.
"
Khuzway
o.Pl
easegetout
."
Inearherandsheexhales.Iki
ssherneckandshe
si
ghs.Iopenherlegsandmakeherbendov er.I
groanasIfeelt
hewar mthofherpussy.Amoanis
si
ghedoutf r
om herl
ips.Ithr
ustsl
owbutdeep.
"
Youwantachi
l
d?"
Shemoansanddoesn'
tanswerme.It
hrustdeep
andshescr
eams.
"
Doy
ouwantachi
l
d?"
"
Ah!Yes-Fuck!
"
"
I'
ll
giv
eyouachi
l
d."
"
Yes!Ah!
"
Ihadmyv asectomyr ever
sedaweekagoandIknow
thatshereall
ywant sanotherchi
l
dbutIwasn' tr
eady
than.Herlegsst artshaki
ngsoIt hr
ustdeeperand
strokesi
deway scausi nghertotrembleasshe
clenchesherwal lsaroundme.Itightenmygrip
aroundherwai stasIf eelmybodyt i
ghteni
ngandI
cum inher.Ipull outandcatchherbeforeshefal
ls.
She'ssti
ll
shakingwi t
hat i
ghtholdaroundme.

KHULEKANI
Mybabyi swrit
ingexamsandwi l
lbedonesoonso
I
'm planningav acati
onf
orus.Ievenboughthera
biki
ni.Iseeherwal ki
ngt
owardsmycarandIopen
thedoorf orher.
"
Baby
."
Shenodsandgetsi
nside.Il
ookatherasshecl
oses
herey
es.Sheopensthem andtear
sfl
ow.Ihat
eit
whenshecri
escauseIalsocry
.
"
Baby
?"
"
Mygr
andmot
hercal
l
ed.
..
"
Ikeepquietandshegl
ancesatmet
omakesur
eI'
m
l
isteni
ng.
"
Mymom.
..
"
Herv
oicewav
ers.
"
She.
..
shecommi
tt
tedsui
cide.
"
Ikeepqui
etandr
estmyheadont
hest
eer
ingwheel
.
"
Shel
eftmeal
ett
er.
"
Shechuckl
es.
"
Alet
ter
?Sheshoul
d'
vej
ustcal
l
edme!
"
Wesiti
nsil
encewithherhandinmine.Final
l
yasob
br
eaksoutfr
om herandIpullhert
omysi de.She
cr
iesonmylap.Onetearescapesmyey eandIsigh.
Ij
ustl
ethercr
yital
lout.
70
UNYEZI
Il
ookattheli
tt
leboyi
nmyar ms.Iwipemyt ear
s
andsmil
e.Iki
sshischeeksandbreast
feedhim.
Langawalksi
nandsmi l
eswidel
y.
"
Mamawabant
wanabami
!"
(mot
herofmychi
l
dren.
)
Ismil
eandhandhim hi
sson.Heki
sseshi
m al
lov
er
thef
aceandstart
sdanci
ngwithhi
minhisar
ms
whil
ereci
ti
nghiscl
annames.
"
Mthunzi
.Hi
snamei
sMt
hunzi
."
Ismil
eandnod.Il i
keit.Ivi
deocallDadandGr anpa.
Theyshowt hei
rfaces.IrememberwhenIbought
them smart
phones.Theydi dn'
tunderst
andhowt hey
worked.Thankstooneofmycousi nstheyshowed
them howitworks.
"
MaGema!
",
dadgr
eet
s.
"
Mzukhul
u."
,gr
andpa.
Ismil
eandwav eatthem.Imreal
lyt
ir
ed.Igi
veLanga
thephoneandDadsay shi
sgoingtocomedownand
seehisnewgrandchi
ld.Heal
sonameshim
Sphamandl
a.
"
Babe.Getsomer
estwhi
l
eIgobat
hthey
oung
man.
"
Ij
ustnodandclosemyey es.Thi
sismylastbaby.
I'
vebui
ltafamil
yformy self
.NowIshoul
dwai ton
beingagrandmothersoon.Av er
yhotgr
andmot her
.

KUHLEKONKE
Amandawalksi
nat17h33andgreet
sus.Shehi
gh
fi
vesSi
neandrushesupst
air
s.
"
Didy
ouev
ert
hinkt
hey
'dl
astt
hisl
ong?
"
Bheki
khay
aandgossi
ping.
"Notreal
l
y.It
houghtaf
terhi
ghschool
they
'dmov
e
on."
"
Youruncl
ecal
l
ed.
"
"
Whatdoeshewant
?"
"Hesaysthatheneedsy'all
tocomedown.Hewent
toconsul
taweekbackandwast ol
dyourf
ather
demandst haty
'al
lgetwelcomedbackt
othefamil
y
agai
n."
"
Whoi
sgoi
ngt
opayf
oral
lthat
?"
"
Yourot
heruncl
eIt
hink.
"
"
Myot
heruncl
e?Al
lmyuncl
e'
sar
edeadbeatmos.
"
"
Idon'
tknowany
thi
ng.
"
"
I'
ll
cal
lhi
m back.
"
Hepi
ckshissonupandkisseshischeekandSine
wi
pesitof
f.Il
aughandBhekikhayaput
shim down.
Hel
ooksathim asSi
newalksaway .
"
Hisgr
owi
ngupi
sn'
the?
"
Il
ookathi
m andnod.
"
Hewon'
tneedmesoon.
"
"
Hewi
l
lal
way
sneedy
ouBabakhe.
"
"He'l
lbeabletoopenthesnackscabi
netwit
houtmy
help.He'
ll
beabletoclimbhisbedwit
houtme
helpi
nghim up.Hewon'tneedmet ot
iehisshoesor
dresshim upanymore."
"
Buthe'
l
lneedy
out
oteachhi
m onhowt
obea
man.
"
Henodsandl
ayshisheadonmythi
ghs.Amanda
wal
ksdownsi
ngingwithSi
neonherwai
st.
"
Mama!Aunt
iei
scooki
ngl
asagne!
",
si
nescr
eams.
Hiswor dsaren'
taudibl
ebutIam al
way swit
hhi
m so
Iunderstandhim andhelov
eslasagne.They
disappeartothekit
chenandIcuddlewithmyman.

THANDO
Isi
tdownwithNengiandherbrot
herpl
ays.Ozo
comesinandmassagesmyf eet.
"OhIlov
ey ou.Yourki
dshavebeencr
awli
ng
ever
ywhere.Layconbrokemyndebel
evase.
"
"
Didhegethur
t?"
"
No.I
tfel
lont
heot
hersi
de.
"
Theycrawlt
owardsusandl
ookatus.Lay
cont akes
hissi
ster
sfeetandst
art
spr
essi
ngit
.Wel aughat
thi
s.
"
I'
mthi
nki
ngofsendi
ngal
ett
ert
oyourf
ather
."
"
Real
l
y?"
"
Yeah.Youdeser
vet
obeaBut
hel
ezi
."
Ismil
eandhekissesmycheek.Thet
winski
sseach
other
scheeks.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"Il
oveyou.Thankyouf
ormakingmeafat
herand
thanksforgiv
ingmeachancetol
ovey
ou
effor
tl
essly
."
Ibl
ushandhechucklesandpul
lsmet
owar
dshim.I
si
tonhislapandthetwi
nsjoi
nusont
hecouchaf
ter
somehelpfrom t
hei
rfat
her.

KHULEKANI
Il
ookatherasshedoeshery oga.She'
slostthe
weight
.Notext
remel
y.She'sj
ustthicknow.I'
m sti
l
l
tr
yingt
ogetusedtohowlightsheis.Ieatingskopo
wit
hherbutshe'
sondiet
snow.
"
Wantt
ojoi
nme?
"
"
No.I
'
m wai
ti
ngony
out
ofi
nisht
hosest
ret
chessoI
canst
ret
chy
ouupr
ightont
hatmat
."
Shel ooksatmeandsi ghs.Iwalkcl
osertoherand
shesi t
sdown.Ipushherdownwhi l
epulli
ngouther
ti
ghts.Ithrowthem acr
osst heroom andslapher
thi
gh.Idiv ei
nbetweenherthighswithmyt ongue
readyt otast
eherjui
ces.Keephermi ndoffher
mot hersdeathforawhil
e.

NOXOLO
Welayt
herecat
chi
ngourbr
eat
he.Il
ookathi
m and
hel
ooksatmesmil
ing.
"
Wher
edi
dyougetal
lthatener
gy?
"
"
Ist
il
lhav
esomel
eft
.Gi
veme5andI
'
llbeback.
"
Hestandsupandgoest othebathroom.Igeti
nside
thecover
sandasI'm abouttosl
eepSanelescreams
forme.IwearNdabest-shi
rtandwalkdownstair
s.
Heisstandi
ngther
ewi t
hhisskateboardunderhis
armpit
.
"
Mom.I
'
m out
.I'
l
lbebackbef
oredi
nner
.Il
ovey
ou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Buthi
sal
readyoutsi
de.Isi
ghandgetbacktoback.I
fi
ndmyhandsomemanwi t
haboner.Iwal
kbackout
ashewal
kst owar
dsme.
"
Noxol
o!"
"
No!
!Yho!
"
Ir
undownst
air
sandsl
eepi
ntheguest
room t
her
e.
71
SEASONFI
NALE
UNYEZI
Il
ookedatthebi
ggreentr
eeinfr
ontofmeandI
l
ookedatMkhulu.HenoddedatmebutIt
ookastep
backshaki
ngmyhead.
"
Ndodakazi
.It
'st
ime.
"
Ishookmyheadwi thtearst rail
i
ngdownmyf ace.I
wasn'tready .Ihadt ur
nedybackonmyancest ors
andIdon' tthinkIwantt of acet hem asy et
.Iturned
aroundandwal kedbacki ntot hehousewher eIj ust
fel
lintomyDad' sar
msandcr i
ed.Hedi dn'
tsay
anythingbutj ustheldmeasIcr i
ed.Theyaremeant
toprotectandpr ovi
denott akeaway .I
'vel
ostal otof
thi
ngsbecauseoft hem!Theyneededsomeonei n
thei
rdumbt hroneandt heydi dn'tcarewhogothur t
forthatthronet ogetoccupi ed.IsitdownandDad
j
oinsme.Il aymyheadonhi sshoul derandsigh.
"
They
'vebr
okeny
ou.You'
reangr
y."
"
YesBaba.Whydot
heydot
his?
"
"Youwi l
lnev erthingsoft hespiri
tual wor ldandhow
theywor k.Igett haty ou'reangrybutt urningy our
backony ourancest orsisar i
sk.Af atalrisk.That's
wher ey ourbl essingsshoul dcomef rom.Yes.How
theydot hingsi sconf usingbutt heyhav et heir
reasons.Heart hem out .You'r
el uckyy oucan
communi catewi tht hem inthemannery oucan.Your
grandmot heri slosingherpat ience.She' sgr owing
ti
red.Ifshet urnsherbackony out hani tsov erfor
you.Youwi ll
notbewel comedi nt hespi ritualreal
m.
You'llbeal ostsoul .Youwon' tbeabl et opr otect
yourki dsbey ondt hegr ave.Thinkaboutt hechi l
dren.
Forgive.Sot heycanbeabl etogi vey ouy our
blessings. "
Idon'
tanswerhim butgoandl ookformykids.Ifi
nd
them wit
hthei
r'Gogo'.She'
st eachi
ngthem howt o
smearcowdungont hef l
oor.They'
recoveredincow
dung.Ohgoodlord.Ileavethem thereandgocheck
onMt hunzi
.Heisupandsucki nghisfi
st.
"
Heboy
."
Hesmil
esshowingoffhi
sgums.Ipi
ckhi
m upand
ki
sshi
m al
loverhi
sfacecausi
nghimtogi
ggl
e.My
phoner
ingsandi
tsLanga.
"
Khuzway
o."
"
MaGema.Ni
njani
?"(
howar
ey'
al
l?
)
"We'r
eokaybabe.Yougood?Haveyoueaten?Ial
so
packedsomebeefcurr
y.Ther
e'schi
ckenaswell.
"
"
Babe.I
t'
sfi
ne.Iat
e.Iwarmedupt hefoody
oul
eft
f
orme.Whenar ey
'al
lcomingback?"
"
OnSat
urday
."
"
Ah!
!"
"
Don'
tbeababy
."
"
But
-"
Theli
ttl
eonecr iesandIsitdownputt
inghisfather
onloudspeaker .It
akeoutmyboobandwi peit
befor
eput ti
ngitinhismouth.Hehasgrown.Ispent
thr
eemont hsher eathome.MkhuluandDad
i
nsist
edt hatIneededhelp.Wedidn'
targuesince
Thandohasherownchi l
drennowcouldn'thel
pme.
"
Hasy
ourDadt
oldThandoaboutt
her
it
ual
?"
"
No.HesentKhul
ekani
todoi
t.
"
"
Khul
ekani
?Ohgoodl
ord!
"
"Heisgoodatthr
owi
ngbombs.Pl
usthi
smi ghtbr
ing
backsomebadmemor i
esandKhul
ekaniknowsher
bett
erplushi
sdumb.
"
"
PoorThando.
"
Wecar
ryongossi
pingandl
aughi
ng.

AMANDA
Iblowmynoseagai nandIgr untwhenIf eela
headachecomi ng.It r
ystandingupbutt hedizzy
spellalmostknocksmeof fmyf eet.Fucked!Isi t
backdown.Iwokeupwi t
haf ev erandI '
m alonei n
thi
shouse.Iwal ksl owlytotheki t
chenl ookingl i
ke
hell
.Iwar m upsomemi lkwhi l
eIt akeoutsomet hi
ng
toeat .It
akeabi teofabi scui
tandi ttastesl i
kesand.
Iwr ench.Ihaven'teatenany thi
ngsi ncemor ningso
nothingcomesout .Isi
tdownont heki t
chenf loor
andcr y.Ihatefeelingsick.IcallNkosi nathiandi t
ri
ngsunanswer ed.Hei spl ayi
ngt oday.Ideci deto
wat chitonli
ne.Itol dhi
m Icoul dn'tmakei t
.Isee
him.KHUZWAYO' 10'andhei spl ayingpr ett
ywel l.
Thegameisnear
lyov
er.Hegetst
ackledandhe
tumbl
esonthegr
oundwrit
hingi
npain.
"
KHUZWAYOi
sdown!
!"
Ifeelemotionalandstartcryi
ng.Iunder
standwhy
hesaidhewant edtoqui tplayi
ngsoccer.Hebet
ter
quit.I
'
llnothavehim cri
ppled.

THANDO
Iopenthedoorf
orKhul
ekani
whowalkspastme
screami
ng,"
Favour
it
euncl
eisher
e!!
".
Ishakemyheadast het wi
nsst umbleandf all
runningtowar dshim.Hel i
ftsbothoft hem upand
kissestheircheeksearninggiggles.I'
mj ustgonna
standher eandwai tforhimt otel
lmewhati she
doinginmyhouse.Heput sthem downandheadst o
thekitchen.TF?If ol
l
owhi m andhei sal r
eadyinthe
fri
dge.Hesi tsdownaf terr
aidingmyf ridge.Ishake
myheadandl eanagainstthestove.Heshov esa
pieceofchi ckeninhismout handl ooksatme.
Finall
yI'
m not i
ced!
"
Ohhey
."
Wow!
"
Bhut
i.
"
"
Wher
e'sy
ourbabydaddy
?"
"
Atwor
k."
"
Mmmh.Whyar
en'
tyouatwor
k?"
"
I'
mtheboss.
"
"
Isn'
thet
hebossaswel
l
?"
"
No.
"
"
Huh?
"
"
It
'shi
sfat
her
'scompany
.Hehasshar
es.
"
"
Oh.Shame.
"
Whati
sthatsupposedt
omean?
"
Whatar
eyoudoi
ngher
e?"
"
Can'
tIv
isi
tmysi
sterandherki
ds?
"
"
You?Wher
eisTshego?
"
"
Atschool
."
"
Soy
oudeci
dedt
obot
herme?
"
"
Yeah.That
'smyj
ob.
"
Si
ghs.
"
Anyway.Youhav
etogodownt
oeChamt
hu.Gogo
want
stoseeyou.
"
"
Why
?"
"You'
redumb.If
orgot
.Ev
erwonder
edhowy
ouhad
kidswit
hOzza?"
"
Ozo.I
'
vewonder
ed.
"
"
What
ever
.Nowi
sti
mef
oranswer
s."
"
Oh.
"
Ineverreall
ywant
edanswers.Iwasj
ustgl
adIcould
conceiveforhi
m.Hecarr
iesoneati
ngasifhehadn'
t
j
ustkil
ledmyj oyf
ort
heday .

NKOSI
NATHI
Iwi
pethewat erof
fmybodyandmyphoneri
ngs.I
t'
s
Amanda.Ianswerqui
ckl
y.Shet
oldmeshewasn'
t
okayi
nthemor
ning.
"
You'
reokay
?"
"Notr
eall
y.Ican'
teatany
thi
ng.I
'
m nauseas.I
'
ve
beenwrenching.
"
"I
'
m comingt
opi
cky
ouupsoIcant
akey
out
othe
doct
or.
"
"
I'
dappr
eci
atet
hat
."
"
Ilov
eyoubaby
."
"
Ilov
eyo-
"
Ihearwrenchi
ngandIquickl
ygetdr
essedandr
unt
o
thecar
.Ihateitwhenshe'
ssick.

BHEKI
KHAYA
Shelooksatt
he'Uncl
e'andf
rowns.Whydi
dshe
dragmet ot
hismeeti
ngagai
n?
"
I'
myourf
ather
stwi
n."
"
I'
venot
iced.
"
Igi
veheral
ook.
"
Wher
ehav
eyoubeen?
"
"
InLondon.
"
"
London?
"
"Yeah.I ntheoldenday st
winswerenotmeantt obe.
Onehadt odie.Thatwasmebuty ourgrandmother
didn'tall
owi tandgav emetoherboss.Al adyshe
wor kedf ori
nt heday.Sherai
sedmeandwel ater
mov edtoLondon.Ihav eawifeandkidsbackhome.
I
'm al soagr andfat
hernow."
Themansmi
l
espr
oudl
y.
"
Goodf
ory
ou.Nowwhatdoy
ouwanther
e?"
Igi
veheranot
herl
ook.Shei
gnor
esme.
"Ihear
daboutmybr ot
her'
sdeathandhear
dhel
eft
kidsbehi
nd.Thoughty'
al
lcoul
dcomebackhome
withme."
"
Why
?"
"Icantakecareofy
ou.Youdon'
thavetodependon
aman.I '
llsendy
outoschool
.Youandyoursist
er.
Y'al
lcanmakesomet hi
ngoutofyour
sel
ves.Nota
housewife."
Ahguesshi
sbeenkeepi
ngtrackwi
tht
hemedi
a.I
cr
ingewhenmywif
escoffs.
"Dependonaman?Housewi fe?School?Somet hi
ng
outofoursel
ves?Don'
tpatronizeme.I'
mv er
y
educated.Mynet-
wort
his400mi l
li
on.MYNET-
WORTH.Letmenotment i
onmyhusband' s.I'
m not
dependingonhim.Iownbusinesses.Ijustpref
er
beingkeptbehi
ndthescenes.Thanky ouforthe
offerbutwe'
refi
ne.
"
Shest
andsupandpicksupSthe.Iwi
denmyeyes
whenshetel
l
smeshe'llbei
nthecar.Il
ookatt
he
maninfr
ontofme.
"
Uhsi
r.Sor
ryaboutherat
ti
tude.
"
"
Iunderst
and.Doapol
ogi
zef
ormei
fIcameout
wrong.
"
Inodandt
akeherhandbag.

NDABENKHULU
Il
ookatherasshelooksatthepregnancyt
estand
bi
tesherl
i
p.She'
llnevergetr
idofthathabi
t.She
handsi
ttome.
"
I'
mtooner
vous.You'
l
ltel
lme.
"
Inodandsi
tdownwhi
l
elooki
ngati
t.
"
Whatdoesi
tsay
?"
"
It
'sshowi
ng'
pregnant
'.
"
"
Pregnant
?"
Inodlookingatthet estconf
used.Shejumpsupand
grabsthetest.Howdoest hi
sthi
ngtel
l i
foneis
pregnant
?Iknewshewaspr egnantal
readybutshe
neededclarif
icat
ion.ShejumpsonmeandIcat ch
her.Shekissesmecr yi
ngandIsmilei
nt heki
ss.
"
Ilov
eyou.
"
"
Ilov
eyout
oo.
"
Il
ayherdownandki ssherwit
hmyhandinbetween
hert
highs.Shelet
soutabreathdi
ggi
nghernai
lson
myshoulders.
TSHEGO
Istompont hejointandspr aythescentaway.Iput
onsunglassesasIseehi scarapproach.Mymom' s
deathtookatollonme.Wor sesi
ncewedi edwhil
e
wewer en'
tonspeaki ngterms.Shel ef
tmeal ett
er
andIstil
lfai
ltoreadit.Igetintothecarandgreet
him whil
echewinggum.
"
You'
reokay
?"
Inodandlaybackontheseat
.Hedoesn'
tsay
anymorebutdri
ves.
"
Cany
oudr
ivemet
ores.
"
Hedoesn'tanswermebutcar
ri
esondr
ivi
ng.The
KeybyTemscomesonandInodmyheadal ongt
o
thebeat
.
"Theheati
sget
ti
ngcol
der
.Theey
esar
esl
owl
y
closi
ng!
"
Isingalongmov ingmyhead.Inot icehei sdrivi
ngt
o
hisplace.I
'
mt oohighf orthi
s.Inoticeapaperbagi n
thebackseat .Steers!Igrabitandst ar
teat i
ng.I
won'tconversewi thhim.He'llnot
iceI '
m high.He
keepsst
eal
i
nggl
ancesatme.I
t'
sgoi
ngt
obeal
ong
wayhome.
72
SEASONFI
NALE
NKOSI
NATHI
Ilookatthescr eenast hedoctormov essomet hi
ng
onherst omach.Il ookatherasshe' slookingatt he
dotont hescreeni nfascinat
ion.Thehear t
beati s
l
oudandIseet hedoct orsayi
ngsomet hingbutI
can'treal
lyhearhi m.Thehear t
beat.Mychi ld'
s
heartbeat.Ami raclebabyforsure.Foughtt hr
ough
birt
hcont rol
.Iholdherhandandshel ooksupatme
andInot i
ceshe' sbeencr yi
ng.HeckI'vebeencr ying
too.Ilookdownatherast hefoctorwipesher .
"
Ilov
eyouandt
hanky
ou.
"
Shesmiles.Ikneeldowni
nf r
ontofgerasshesi
ts
upstr
aightpull
inghershi
rtdown.
"You'
vebeent hereformet hroughshitandI
appreci
ateit
.You'venev erst
oppedl ovi
ngmeev en
thoughIwasshi tt
ytoy ou.YouknowI 'm notgood
withwordsbutIpr omisetosi ngyouyourfavourit
e
songlatert
onight.SoAmandaSi l
angwecany ougo
outonadat ewi t
hme?Butasmyf i
ance?"
Shel
ooksatmeandbl
i
nks.
"
Wil
lyoumar
ryme?
"
ShenodsherheadandIsmi leandstandup.Iki
ss
herpassionatel
y.WellIst
il
l needt
obuyt heri
ngbut
fornowletmecher ishthi
smoment .I
fIknewthese
weregoingt obetheresul
tsIwoul d'
vetakenherto
thedoctorthatdayshecalledmesay ingshewas
sicki
nsteadoflist
eningtoherwhenshesai dshe
wasbetter.

THANDO
IlookedatOzoast heypour edgoatbileonhi m.I
l
ookedatt het winsast heyplaywithizi
phandla.We
havingawel comi ngceremonyf orOzo.Hewasn' t
mychosenonebutmysecondchancemat e.I
t
happenswheny ourchosenonedi es.LikeBabaand
Naledy.Iwipemyt earsasIseehi m walktowards
me.Heshakeshi sheadatmeandbr i
ngsmecl oser
tohim.Iholdont i
ghttohim asIshakewi t
h
emot i
ons.Godknowst hataft
erSphamandl aI
thoughtitwast heendf orme.ThatIwasn' tgoingto
fi
ndhappinessorev erhavekids.If
eelli
tt
lehands
onmyl egandl ookdownatt hetwinsjoi
ningi
non
thehug.Igiggl
eandpi ckNengi upandOzopi cks
Laycon.Theysmi leanddimplesappearontheir
cheeks.Theylookl i
kemebecausewel lKhuzwayo
genesarewar r
iors.ToughasShakaZul u.
"
Baby
."
Helooksatmesmili
ng.Iputhi
shandonmyt ummy
andhelooksatmeconfusedandInodmyhead.He
l
aughsandkissesme.I
'm 5weekspregnant
.Ij
ust
hopeit
'snott
winsagai
notherwi
seI'
l
l j
umpoffacl
iff
.

BHEKI
KHAYA
Ipar kinherpaternal
homeandki dsruntowardst he
carasIopent heboot.Igetoutandshei swalking
towar dsmedr essedrespectful
l
y.Inearherandshe
throwsher sel
finmyar ms.She'sstil
lbeaut
if
ul ast he
fi
rstdayIsawheront hatstri
pperpole.We'v
ecome
al ongway .I
'm happytoseehert hi
scontent.She
fi
nal l
yacceptedheruncleafteralotofconvi
nci ng
from me.Amandai ssti
llabithesit
antandis
supposetoar
ri
vel
atert
odayf
ort
hei
rImbel
eko
tomorrow.
"
MaSi
l
angwe.
"
"Myeniwam.I
'vedi
shedupfory
ou.Gositwi
ththe
othermenint
hekraal
.I'
l
lbr
ingyourf
oodtoyouina
min."
Inodandpeckherf orehead.Shesmilesandwalks
away.Iclosethebootaftert
heki dsl
efti
tempty.I
walktothekraalwheretheSilangwemenar eseat
ed.
Isi
tdownonabenchaf t
ergreeti
ng.
"ThankyouKhuzwayoforlov
ingandtaki
ngcar
eof
ourdaughter
s.You'
rearealman.
",
Bab'Si
l
angwe,t
he
onefrom Londonsays.
Hehasbl endedwellwit
hinhi
sfami l
y.Beingthe
eldestint
hefamilyheistheonethatwillsl
aughter
thegoattomorrow.Ican'
tbehereunf or
tunatel
yasI
havet ofl
youttoDubaiforameeting.

KHULEKANI
Il
ookatherasshesmokesherweed.Shehasher
dreadst iedmessi lyonherhead.Shei ssitt
ingi n
medi tati
onposi ti
on.Reggaei spl ayingsof t
lyi nthe
backgr ound.She' sjusti nherbr aandt hong.She' s
l
ostwei ghtandl ooksv erysexy .She' ssti
llthickj ust
biggerboot ywi thaf latst omach.She' sbeent aking
suppl ement sandt heweedhel ped.Iwal kinand
cl
oset hedoorbehi ndme.Shef i
nallynoticesmeand
quicklyputsoutherj oi nt.It
'sbeenmont hsofme
knowi nghernewsmoki nghabi tandsheal socame
cl
ean.Shej ustdoesn' tfeelcomf ort
ablesmoki ngin
mypr esence.Appar ent lyshef eel sasifshe' s
disrespectingme.Thi sonewor riest oomuchabout
myf eeli
ngst hansheshoul dher s.She'll
qui twhen
shewant sto.Ialsodon' tcriti
cizehersmoki ng.She's
oldenough.Isi tont opofherbed.Shegotanew
apar tmentandi sani nternatapubl ichospi tal.
"
Babe.
"
"
Spur
aMal
uda!
"
Shegigglesandlaucheshersel
fatme.Icat
chher
easil
y.I
'
vegr ownaccustomedtohernewwei ght
.
We'veagreedtomotr ushintomarr
iageunt
ilshe
getsherfir
stpaycheck.
NDABENKHULU
"Isai
ddunkedwingsNdabe!Whatam Isupposedt
o
dowithpi
zza?"
Shesitsdownandst artscr
ying.Il
ookatSaneleand
heisjustasconfused.Hetakesouthisphoneand
pressesonitf
orawhi le.Henearhismotherand
brushesherback.
"I
t'
sokaymom.Yourdunkedwi
ngsandbur
gerar
e
onthei
rway.
"
Bur
ger
?
"
Thanky
oubaby
.Cheesebur
gerr
ight
?"
"
Yes.
"
Hetakesouthi
sphoneagai
nandpr
essesi
t.He
passesbymeandwhisper
s.
"Youoweme.Goodt
hingy
ouownar est
aur
ant
.
Thosechef
snumber
scomeinhandy
."
Hewinksandl
eav
esmewi
thanowi
cecr
eam eat
ing
Noxol
o.
"
Sdu-mama.
"
Ihavetorefr
ainfrom cal
linghersdudlacausei
tsan
i
ssueandappar entlyI
'm bodyshami ngher
.Isi
tnext
toherandputherf eetonmyt highs.Amassagewill
dowiththeseswol l
enfeet.Ist
il
l hav
e7mont hsto
gowiththi
spr egnancy.
"
Ilov
eyouKhuzway
o."
Il
ookatherandsmi
l
e.
"
Ilov
eyout
oomama.
"
Sherel
axesonthecouchasImassageherf eet
.
Shame.Mypoorwi f
e.Herfeetar
eswoll
en.I
'm
exci
tedaboutt
hisbaby.Ican'
twai
tfori
ttobeborn.I
wantababygir
l.

UNYEZI
Il
eavet hei
ncenseandcandlesburningandhead
out
.IfindLangawi tht
hekids.Nkanyeziiscolouri
ng
anelephantgreen.Isi
tnexttothem andLanga
ki
ssesmyhead.Iam st il
linmyhealerattir
e.After
l
ett
inggooft hehatredandcommuni cat
ingwithmy
grandmot hershegr antedmemygi ftback.Thout he
kingdom hasf al
l
enbutt hegi ftwi l
lcarryonbei ng
transf err
edf rom gener ati
ont ogener ati
on.I '
ve
openedpl atformsonl inewher eIconsul tanddo
phot or eadi ngs.Ialsot alkaboutancest ralgif
ts.I
shedl i
ghtonspi rit
uality.I'
veal way shadahuge
platfor m andIhav eaccumul ated2mi l
lionf ol
lowers
onI nst aandImakegoodmoneyf rom it.Ialsohav e
agr eatYouTubepl atform.Ial sohav eonl i
nelive
podcast swi t
hot herspi r
it
ual giftedbeings.I 'm
knownasGogoGema.Myf ami l
yhasbeenwi thme
throughev erythi
ng.Langahasbeent hebl essingI'
ve
pray edf ori nmyor pganageday s.We' r
er enewi ng
ourv owsi naf ewmont hs.Il ookathi m andI '
m met
byt hemoonandocean.Ev enaf terallthesey ears
theyst i
llf
asci nateme.

THEEND

Thanky
ouf
ory
ourpat
iencezi
thandwa.

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