EFFECTIVE GUIDE TO COMMUNICATION

5 MYTHS AROUND COMMUNICATION- These are the

myths that you need to get out of your mind to become
an effective communicator.
1)You Need to Be Well Versed with English- This is the
biggest myth that people have while communicating.
Most people believe that they need to be good at
English to be a confident speaker which is a lie. It is ok
if you fumble while speaking English & there is no
problem with it because English is not your first
language. Hence, you need to take this myth out of
your head that you need to be good at English if you
need to be a good communicator.
2) Introverts Struggle to Be an Effective Communicator-
This is also one of the biggest myths of effective
communication. Introversion & Extroversion has got
nothing to do with how good you communicate.
People often confuse confidence & lack of
preparation with introversion. You can very well be
an introvert and still be immensely confident & you
can very well be an extrovert & not be confident.
Hence, you need to take this myth out of your head.
3) Communication Is All About Spoken Words- It is also
one of the biggest lies about communication. Even
when you are talking to an audience, then also only
20% of communication happens through what you
speak & 80% of communication happens with your
body language like how you stand, how you move
your hands, your facial expressions, etc. Therefore,
don’t limit yourself thinking that if you can’t speak
well, you can’t be a good communicator.
Communication is about listening, writing, speaking
& body language.
4) Confidence Is Inborn- It is also one of the biggest
myths about communication. People believe that
confidence is inborn, some have it some don’t have it
but the truth is that confidence comes from
preparations, practice & repeated efforts. In the
starting, everyone is nervous, terrified & lacks
confidence, but the art of doing it consistently,
showing up every day is what separates the winners
from the losers.
5) Communication Has Happened- This is the biggest
myth around communication. It is a myth that if you
speak, communication has happened, if you send an
email, communication has happened.
Communication is not about what you do, it is about
how the person opposite to you receives it & if they
 haven’t understood it, then communication has not
happened. The act of communicating is not the
completion of the task, it is the start of the task & it
will only finish when both sides agree on what
needed to be communicated.
These are some of the myths that we all have lived & they
have become our excuses to not become a good
communicator. Therefore, it is very important to not bring
these myths in your mind because the more you bring
these things in your mind, the less effective communicator
you will become.
3 THINGS YOU NEED TO BECOME A GOOD PUBLIC
SPEAKER-
1) Ability To Tell a Story- Stories are the way that the
world gets to understand the world. If you don’t bring
stories into your conversation, you will never be able
to hold the audience in its truest form. The best
interactions always have a story in it. Always narrate
your point of view through a story.
2) Know Your Audience- This is one of the most
important elements of public speaking. You need to
know about your audience, their age, their
experience, where they come from, what have they
studied, what do they do at this company, what are
their likes dislikes, etc.
 Any bit of detail you get about your audience is going
to help you & thus you can change the stories which
you are going to tell them & to which your audience
can relate to. The better you know your audience,
the better stories you can share with them.
E.g.1- If Ankur is speaking to 18-24 years old, then he
would not share stories about the movies & the songs
he heard while growing up because they will not
relate to it. Instead, he will share stories about how he
was during their age, the things he did during that
age, because that is something the other person can
relate to.
E.g.2- If Ankur is speaking to people in their 30s or
40s, then he will draw back into those memory lanes
& share stories about the things he and the other
person grew up on because that’s the common thing
that connects him and the other person.
3) Practice Over & Over Again- There is no way you will
become an effective public speaker if you don’t
practice. Thus, you need to practice over & over &
over again. The more you practice, the more recognize
for what kind of audience which story will work,
where should you draw the line, how should you
conduct yourself, etc.
3 THINGS TO BUILD UPON-
1.Writing- If you are a person who thinks of a lot of
things constantly like what to do what not to do, I
need to call that person, I forgot that, etc., then your
mind is a very poor judge of which thought is the most
important thought. So, when you will be talking &
listening to an audience then you will be having so
many thoughts in your mind that you will lose your
rhythm & forget what you wanted to say.

The solution to this problem is writing. This is because

when you are writing, you are asking your brain to
select the most important thought & write it down.
We can think faster then we can write & because
writing is slow you will pickup the most important
thought in your head & convert it into something. And
because of this, you learn how to channelize your
thoughts, you learn how to pickup the most important
thought from all the thoughts that are running in your
head. Therefore, every single day before you go to bed
just write a page about anything that you want or
anything that comes in your mind.
2.Voice Modulation- The way you speak in terms of the
tone is very important. E.g.- Watch the module. The
words you use & the way you deliver them creates
emotion. To see it yourself, record a video of yourself
speaking about something, & then watch it. Now put
your phone upside down, close your eyes & just listen
to it. When you listen to it then you will get to know
how your voice sounds & which emotions are getting
generated which the people will feel when they will
hear you.

This will also come with time & you will also know
what works for you & what does not work for you. You
maybe someone who can never go high volume or
you maybe someone who can never go low volume &
that’s ok. Don’t try to be someone else, just be
yourself. But you have to realize that in the way you
talk normally you bring emotions.

Silence is also a very magical thing in voice

modulation. Even when you are speaking your ability
to bring silence in your delivery perfectly will change
the game forever.
 3.Body Language- 80% of all communication happens
with your body language. How you use your hands,
the way you stand, the facial expressions you show, all
are very important. E.g.- If Ankur just folds his hand &
speaks without using his hands & without showing
facial expressions than I will not like the way he talks,
but when he uses his hands & shows various facial
expressions then I will like the way he talks.

The best way you can learn it is by observing others,

observing speakers you like, realizing how do they
use their tone, how do they stand, how do they use
their hands, etc.
These are the 3 things that you need to bear in mind while
you are talking to an audience. These things will not come
in one day but as you practice more & more, you will get
better & better. When these 3 things come together, you
are a superman.
30 DAYS EXERCISE TO GET BETTER-
Note- You have to do this exercise continuously for 30
days. If you even miss 1 day, you have to start it all over
again.
 Step 1- Use your phone and record a video of yours
speaking on any topic for 1 min. Note that you need
to speak on only 1 topic for 30 days. E.g.- Fruits, Sales,
SEO, Football, etc. The topic can be anything you wish.
 Step 2- Mute the video & just watch it. Now at this
time you cannot hear yourself & but only see yourself.
What you will see here is what people see through
your body language.
 Step 3- Observe & make notes. Write down what are
the things you liked about it, what are the things you
felt were good, where are the areas you felt
connected, where are the areas you felt bored, what
are the areas that you want to work on.
 Step 4- Put the phone upside down. Keep the volume
up & play the video. Now, at this time you cannot see
yourself but only hear yourself. This is what other
people hear when they can’t see you. This thing will
also generate emotions in you.
 Step 5- Make notes. What are the things that worked,
what are the things that didn’t worked, what are the
things you liked, what are the things you didn’t like,
 what are the emotions that got generated, what are
the things you can improve upon. Forget about the
fumble you made, the uh, ums, ehs, etc. All these
things will fix itself.
 Step 6- Now you watch the video in full, with the voice
& with the video & now you make notes again
because now everything has come together.
At the end of these 30 days, you’ll be a changed person.
That’s a fact. The level of confidence you will have, the
level of clarity you will have & the level of awareness you
will have will be unbelievable.
ONE LAST THING ABOUT SPOKEN COMMUNICATION-
Don’t ever refuse any public speaking event or
opportunity. Whether it is something at home, whether it
is between friends, whether it is to lead a team at work,
whether it is to present a meeting, whether it is to show
up on stage for anything, etc.
You need to always raise your hand because you are going
to learn a lot. Let the people laugh at you, judge you,
mock at you, think you are noob, etc. All this is temporary.
When you do this, you will be learning whether the
exercises you are doing are worth it or not.