Gain Control of Your Fear

by Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

Having a problem with fear?

Find yourself making excuses to not walk up and talk to women?

Break out into a sweat when a woman walks up and starts talking to you?

Here is something that just might help.

When fear takes you over and you don’t decide to ask a girl for her number,
you know what is happening? Your fear is controlling you.

Your fear makes the decision not to talk to the girl. Your fear scrambles your
brain when you try and talk to a woman. You have lost control and your fear is
running your life. You need to learn how to turn that around and take control
of your fear instead.

Ancient cultures like the Chinese rationalized this sort of thing in the form of
demons. There were rage demons, lust demons, fear demons, and numerous
others which sought to possess you and control you. Many people believed
these demons to be real, but really they are icons for emotions, created as a
way of trying to explain the way we behave.

A side benefit came from this though. By personifying some of your emotions
as demons, you give them a physical form. And by giving them a physical
form you can suddenly disassociate yourself from them.

So today I want to see if I can disassociate you from your fear.

If this works then you should be able to better control your fear rather than
have it controlling you. To do this we need to give our fear a physical form.
Not a demon form though, that’s unnecessary and not appropriate here. Let’s
leave that to ancient eastern mythology. No, I want you to see fear as a
woman.

Like a woman, your fear is emotional and irrational and wanting of attention.
And like a woman, your fear gets jealous when you look or think about other
women.

Rather than feeling fear take you over, see it as a woman whispering in your
ear trying to keep you to herself.

Now you, the DJ, should know, I hope, that you should never let a woman
control you. You are certainly not going to let some bimbo emotion do it, are
you? Let’s see what can be done to regain control of this annoying bitch.
Imagine your fear as a fat, pimply-faced, ugly, teen school girl with thick
glasses. She has a crush on you and does not want you getting together with
any other woman, especially the hot ones. She does not want you to talk to
the girls that you want to go out with because she is jealous of them. She
plays on your insecurities every time you think of talking to another girl. Give
her a name, call her Charlene.

Next time you see a girl, guess what is going to happen? Your fear is going to
start to surface.

As soon as this happens, I want you to imagine your fear forming as

Charlene, standing next to you, giving you an ugly look with that ugly pimpled
face. She is going to whisper into your ear telling you that you will surely fail
and feel embarrassed if you try and approach the girl.

But now your fear is no longer within you. It is standing next to you in the form
of Charlene. Your fear is outside of you as Charlene, who you are going to
ignore her, even laugh at her, because a Don Juan must never let a woman
control him -- and you are a Don Juan.

Now walk up to that woman over there and say "Hi." And as you do imagine
giving Charlene a kick in the guts as you leave her behind. Imagine Charlene
poking her tongue out at you from across the room as you start talking to the
woman. What a silly little girl is Charlene.

You may fear fear, but you will never fear some fat, ugly chick named
Charlene.

Give it a try -- you have nothing to lose.

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Stop Thinking So Much

by De La Soul

The human mind is a funny thing. It is the mind, inside you which controls
whether you succeed or not in almost everything in life. If you can master your
mind, you will come off as a cool, confident, powerful man.

The mind has 2 parts:

The first part is like the computer of your brain. If you program it with the
necessary information it will automatically recall this information when
needed.

However, the second part of the mind is what ultimately controls whether you
succeed or not -- the ego. The ego is the part of the mind which clutters your
in-built computer with un-necessary information. The ego feeds your mind
with un-necessary information about past experiences, possible future
experiences, how people might be looking at you, etc. Letting your ego take
control of you will essentially ruin your chances of succeeding.

Let me give you an example.

In a game of football when you need to make a tackle, you will execute the
tackle most effectively if you clear your mind of all useless info and let your
brain’s computer take control. In other words, if you stop thinking and start
doing.

If you feed your mind with useless information about the person you are about
to tackle (size, expression on face, what could happen, what has happened in
the past) or the conditions (it’s raining, I’m tired) your brain’s computer will
respond by making your body respond (i.e. you will do the "safest" thing
possible and swing your arm wildly while the guy who should be half
unconscious on the ground will shoot past for a touchdown).

This is because when you fed your brain with all the extra info it got confused,
and presumed you were scared and needed safety, so you swung your arms
ineffectively.

If you had just fed your brain with the necessary info such as the direction and
velocity of the person running you would have made a good tackle. (If you
have practiced tackling your ’computer’ will automatically recall the technique,
you don’t have to think about it.)

The same can be said when approaching a woman.

If you feed your ’computer’ with useless info about a woman’s appearance,
her friends, what could happen, what has happened in the past, etc. -- YOU
WILL FALTER.

You don’t have to feed your brain with any other info other than smile, initiate
kino, make eye contact, and take control. (The beauty of your brain’s
computer is that once you’ve done this a few times, and start trusting yourself
to do the right thing, you never have to think when approaching a woman
again!) If you do this you will get the girl every time.

So, it’s not just about imagining, it’s about feeding your mind with pure,
necessary information and NOTHING ELSE!

I also believe this is why the 3 second rule works. Because you don’t have
time to let your ego interfere.

If you can master your ego so that it lives only in the present and only delivers
messages to your brain containing useful information with no self-doubt, fear
or references to the past/future -- YOU WILL SUCCEED!