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This question will ask you to list 4 things about a specific topic from a specific section of the
text. It will look something like the example below:

0 1

Read again the first part of the Source from lines 1 to 7.


List four things from this part of the text about the weather in Cornwall.
[4 marks]
1 __________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
2 __________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
3 __________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________
4 __________________________________________________________________________
__________________________________________________________________________

 Do not spend too long on this question – no more than 5 minutes.


 Make sure you are answering the question.
TOP  Refer to the specified lines of the text only.
TIPS:  Keep it quick – either summarise OR quote, not both.
 Read the extract carefully and make sure you are not inferring.

Activities to help you practise for Question 1 Tick when


complete
TEST Use the ‘test yourself’ section to practise finding information about a specific
topic. Read the extracts and then list 4 things asked in the question.
CREATE Search the website below and read the opening of a selection of these books.
Find key information in their opening sentences.
https://www.goodreads.com/shelf/show/classic-must-reads

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Step 1: Read the extract and
highlight words/phrases
relating to the question.
Jamaica Inn

It was a cold grey day in late November. The weather had changed overnight, when a backing wind
brought a granite sky and a mizzling rain with it, and although it was now only a little after two o’clock
in the afternoon the pallor of a winter evening seemed to have closed upon the hills, cloaking them in
mist. It would be dark by four. The air was clammy cold, and for all the tightly closed windows it
5 penetrated the interior of the coach. The leather seats felt damp to the hands, and there must have
been a small crack in the roof, because now and again little drips of rain fell softly through, smudging
the leather and leaving a dark-blue stain like a splodge of ink.

0 1

Read again the first part of the Source from lines 1 to 7.


List four things from this part of the text about the weather in Cornwall.
[4 marks]
1 _________________________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________________________
Step 2: Summarise or quote 4
2 _________________________________________________________________________________________
things relating to the question.
_________________________________________________________________________________________
3 E.g. The weather…
_________________________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________________________
4 _________________________________________________________________________________________
_________________________________________________________________________________________

Mark scheme:
This assesses AO1: Identify and interpret explicit and implicit information and ideas.

Indicative content; students may include:

 It was a cold day


 The weather had changed overnight
 There was a wind
 There was mist on the hills
 The air was clammy
 The air was cold
 It was raining

 Or any other valid responses that you are able to verify by checking the Source.

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Read the extract List 4 things…
From The Gift by Cecelia Ahern List 4 things we learn about Christmas morning:
1.
On Christmas morning an air of calm settles outside. The
emptiness on the streets doesn’t instill fear; in fact it has the
opposite effect. It’s a picture of safety, and, despite the 2.
seasonal chill, there’s warmth. For varying reasons, for every
household this day of every year is just better spent inside.
While outside is somber, inside is a world of bright frenzied 3.
colour, a hysteria of ripping wrapping paper and flying
coloured ribbons. Christmas music and festive fragrances of
cinnamon and spice and all things nice fill the air. 4.
Exclamations of glee, of hugs and thanks, explode like party
streamers. These Christmas days are indoor days; not a sinner
lingering outside, for even they have a roof over their heads.
From Watership Down by Richard Adams List 4 things we learn about the landscape:
1.
Toward the edge of the wood, where the ground became open
and sloped down to an old fence and a brambly ditch beyond,
only a few fading patches of pale yellow still showed among 2.
the dog's mercury and oaktree roots. On the other side of the
fence, the upper part of the field was full of rabbit holes. In
places the grass was gone altogether and everywhere there 3.
were clusters of dry droppings, through which nothing but the
ragwort would grow. A hundred yards away, at the bottom of
the slope, ran the brook, no more than three feet wide, half 4.
choked with kingcups, watercress and blue brooklime.
From Les Miserables by Victor Hugo List 4 things we learn about Jean Valjean:
1.
On the following morning, at daybreak, Jean Valjean was
still by Cosette's bedside; he watched there motionless, 2.
waiting for her to wake.
Some new thing had come into his soul.
3.
Jean Valjean had never loved anything; for twenty-five years
he had been alone in the world. He had never been father,
lover, husband, friend. In the prison he had been vicious, 4.
gloomy, chaste, ignorant, and shy.
From Heroes by Robert Cormier List 4 things we learn about Frances:
1.
My name is Francis Joseph Cassavant and I have just
returned to Frenchtown in Monument and the war is over and
I have no face. 2.
Oh, I have eyes because I can see and ear-drums
because I can hear but no ears to speak of, just bits of
dangling flesh. But that’s fine, like Dr Abrams says, because 3.
it’s sight and hearing that count and I was not handsome to
begin with. He was joking, of course. He was always trying
to make me laugh. 4.

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This question will ask you to analyse how the writer has used language in a specific section
of the text. It will look something like the example below:

0 2

Look in detail at this extract from lines 8 to 18 of the Source:


The wind came in gusts, at times shaking the coach as it travelled round the bend of the
road, and in the exposed places on the high ground it blew with such force that the
10 whole body of the coach trembled and swayed, rocking between the high wheels like a
drunken man. The driver, muffled in a greatcoat to his ears, bent almost double in his
seat in a faint attempt to gain shelter from his own shoulders, while the dispirited horses
plodded sullenly to his command, too broken by the wind and the rain to feel the whip
that now and again cracked above their heads, while it swung between the numb fingers
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of the driver. The wheels of the coach creaked and groaned as they sank into the ruts on
the road, and sometimes they flung up the soft spattered mud against the windows,
where it mingled with the constant driving rain, and whatever view there might have
been of the countryside was hopelessly obscured.
How does the writer use language here to describe the effects of the weather?
You could include the writer’s choice of:

 words and phrases


 language features and techniques
 sentence forms.
[8 marks]

 Do not spend too long on this question – no more than 10 minutes.


 Make sure you are answering the question refer to the specified lines of the text only.
 Identify specific techniques accurately.
TOP  Quote the techniques but keep quotes short (just enough prove your analysis).
 Specific effects nothing too general. Focus on effect of technique, relating it back to the text.
TIPS  Keep focussed on language – not punctuation or structure (even though it says you can talk
: about sentences - this is dodgy ground).
 Don’t tell the examiner what the technique means – they will know.
 Go straight to analysis – don’t put an introduction unless it is definitely going to pick up
marks about language analysis.

Activities to help you practise for Question 2 Tick when


complete
TEST Use the ‘test yourself’ section to practise analysing language.
WORKSHEETS Complete the language technique worksheets.
CREATE Search the website below to help you identify and learn a range of
language techniques. Create a glossary of key terms. http://literary-
devices.com/

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Step 1: Read the extract and highlight words/phrases relating to the
question and annotating the technique/word type.

nouns

0 2 verb/personification

Look in detail at this extract from lines 8 to 18 of the Source:


adjective The wind came in gusts, at times shaking the coach as it travelled round the bend of the
road, and in the exposed places on the high ground it blew with such force that the
10 whole body of the coach trembled and swayed, rocking between the high wheels like a
drunken man. The driver, muffled in a greatcoat to his ears, bent almost double in his
simile seat in a faint attempt to gain shelter from his own shoulders, while the dispirited horses
plodded sullenly to his command, too broken by the wind and the rain to feel the whip
that now and again cracked above their heads, while it swung between the numb fingers
15 of the driver. The wheels of the coach creaked and groaned as they sank into the ruts on
the road, and sometimes they flung up the soft spattered mud against the windows,
where it mingled with the constant driving rain, and whatever view there might have
been of the countryside was hopelessly obscured. sibilance/ onomatopoeia
How does the writer use language here to describe the effects of the weather?
You could include the writer’s choice of: adverb senses

 words and phrases


 language features and techniques
 sentence forms.
[8 marks]

Step 2: Pick 3-4 different techniques that you think are effective in relation to the question.
Top Tip: Do not keep writing about the same technique for each paragraph – make links about the
recurring technique and it’s effect in one paragraph.
Step 3: Identify specific techniques the writer has used and find appropriate short quotes.
Step 4: Explain and analyse why the writer has used the technique and the effect it creates.
Top Tip: Do not make general statements that could be about any text e.g. makes the reader want
to read on. Keep referring back to the effect in relation to the specific text in the paper.

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Mark scheme:
This question assesses Language ie: Words / Phrases / Language Features / Language
Techniques / (Sentence Forms!)
AO2: Explain, comment on and analyse how writers use language to achieve effects and influence
readers, using relevant subject terminology to support their views
Level 4 Shows detailed and perceptive understanding of language:
Detailed, perceptive analysis • Analyses the effects of the writer’s choices of language
7-8 marks • Selects a judicious range of textual detail
Level 3 Shows clear understanding of language:
Clear, relevant explanation • Explains clearly the effects of the writer’s choices of language
5-6 marks • Selects a range of relevant textual detail
• Makes clear and accurate use of subject terminology
Level 2 Shows some understanding of language:
Some understanding and • Attempts to comment on the effect of language
comment • Selects some appropriate textual detail
3-4 marks • Makes some use of subject
Level 1 Shows simple awareness of language:
Simple, limited comment • Offers simple comment on the effect of language
1-2 marks • Selects simple references or textual details

AO2 content may include the effect of ideas such as:

 use of sentence length variously related to the content of the extract


 use of, for example, nouns and verbs to enhance description
 the cumulative effect of chosen words and phrases
 employing imagery such as simile.

Level 4 paragraph: The opening paragraph consists of a single, complex sentence perhaps reflecting
the onward movement of the coach. The adjective ‘exposed’ and the noun ‘force’, evoke the idea
of vulnerability, danger, and how little control man has over the power of nature. The verb ‘rocking’,
progresses the cumulative effect of the list of verbs, ‘shaking’, ‘trembled’, ‘swayed’ leading to the
simile, ‘rocking between the high wheels like a drunken man’ suggesting the coach is lurching
haphazardly, its movement out of control.

Level 3 paragraph: The opening, complex sentence is long and so gives the effect of a never-ending
storm. Then nouns like ‘gusts’ and ‘force’ are used to show the reader how unpredictable and strong
the wind was. The effect of the wind on the coach is built up by the writer’s use of verbs –‘shaking’,
then ‘trembled’, then ‘swayed’. The word ‘trembled’ makes it sound as if the coach is almost
frightened of the weather.

Level 2 paragraph: The writer says, ‘The wind came in gusts at times shaking the coach’. The word
‘gusts’ emphasises that sometimes the wind blew stronger than others and was making the coach
shake or shudder. The phrase, ‘shaking the coach’, has the effect of making us feel frightened for the
passengers because you shake when you are afraid.

Level 1 paragraph: The writer says ‘The wind came in gusts at times shaking the coach’. The word
‘gusts’ emphasises that sometimes the wind was strong and was making the coach shake.Note:
Level 1 and 2 specify use ‘the word’, whereas Level 3 and 4 identify the specific word types e.g.
noun, verb, adjective.

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Useful phrases...
...for writing a point

...for adding a quote

...for commenting on a quote

...for synthesising information

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Read the extract Question
From The Gift by Cecelia Ahern
Practise question:
If you were to stroll down the candy-cane façade of a suburban housing estate early
on Christmas morning, you couldn’t help but observe how the houses in all their How does the writer use
tinseled glory are akin to the wrapped parcels that lie beneath the Christmas trees language to describe the
within. For each holds their secrets inside. The temptation of poking and prodding at atmosphere at
the packaging is the equivalent of peeping through a crack in the curtains to get a Christmas?
glimpse of a family in Christmas-morning action; a captured moment that’s kept
away from all prying eyes. For the outside world, in a calming yet eerie silence that
exists only on this morning every year, homes stand shoulder to shoulder like painted
toy soldiers: chests pushed out, stomachs tucked in, proud and protective of all
within.
Houses on Christmas morning are treasure chests of hidden truths. A wreath
on a door like a finger upon a lip; blinds down like closed eyelids. Then, at some
unspecific time, beyond the pulled blinds and drawn curtains, a warm glow will
appear, the smallest hint of something happening inside. Like stars in the night sky
which appear to the naked eye one by one, and like tiny pieces of gold revealed as
they’re sieved from a stream, lights go on behind the blinds and curtains in the half-
light of dawn. As the sky becomes star-filled and as millionaires are made, room by
room, house by house, the street begins to awaken.
From Watership Down by Richard Adams
Practise question:
At the top of the bank, close to the wild cherry where the blackbird sang, was
a little group of holes almost hidden by brambles. In the green half-light, at the How does the writer use
mouth of one of these holes, two rabbits were sitting together side by side. At language to describe the
length, the larger of the two came out, slipped along the bank under cover of landscape?
the brambles and so down into the ditch and up into the field. A few moments
later the other followed.
The first rabbit stopped in a sunny patch and scratched his ear with rapid
movements of his hind leg. Although he was a yearling and still below full
weight, he had not the harassed look of most "outskirters" -- that is, the rank
and file of ordinary rabbits in their first year who, lacking either aristocratic
parentage or unusual size and strength, get sat on by their elders and live as
best they can -- often in the open -- on the edge of their warren. He looked as
though he knew how to take care of himself. There was a shrewd, buoyant air
about him as he sat up, looked around and rubbed both front paws over his
nose. As soon as he was satisfied that all was well, he laid back his ears and
set to work on the grass.
His companion seemed less at ease. He was small, with wide, staring eyes
and a way of raising and turning his head which suggested not so much
caution as a kind of ceaseless, nervous tension. His nose moved continually,
and when a bumblebee flew humming to a thistle bloom behind him, he
jumped and spun round with a start that sent two nearby rabbits scurrying for
holes before the nearest, a buck with black-tipped ears, recognized him and
returned to feeding.

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Read the extract Question
From The Shakespeare Curse by J.L. Carrell
Practise
Wrapped in a gown of blue-green velvet trimmed with gold, a queen’s crown on his head, the question:
boy sat drowsing in the throne near the centre of the Great hall, just at the edge of the light.
Tomorrow, it would be the king who sat there. Not a player king, but the real one, His How does the
Majesty King James 1 of England and V1 of Scotland. Tonight, however, some-one among writer use
the players had been needed to sit there and see just what the king on his throne would see as language to
Mr Shakespeare’s new Scottish play, blood- spattered and witch-haunted, conjured a rite of describe the
nameless evil. atmosphere in the
The boy, who was not in this scene, had volunteered. But the rehearsal had been hall?
unaccountably delayed, stretching deep into the frigid November night, until it was almost as
cold inside the unheated hall as it was in the frost-rimed courtyards below. The heavy gown,
though, was warm, as the hours crawled on, the boy found it hard to keep his eyes open.
Well out of the torchlight illuminating the playing area, a grizzled man-at-arms in a
worn leather jerkin, gaunt as a figure of famine, leaned against the wall at the edge of the
tapestry, seeming to drowse as well.
From Street Cat Bob by James Bowen
Practise
I first met him on a gloomy Thursday evening in March. There was a hint of frost in the air question:
that night when me and my friend Belle arrived back at my new flat in Tottenham, north
London, after a day busking around Covent Garden. How does the
The strip lighting in the hallway was broken, but as we made our way to the stairwell writer use
I noticed a pair of glowing eyes in the gloom. When I heard a gentle meow I realised what it language to
was. describe his first
Edging closer, I could see a ginger cat curled up on a doormat outside one of the encounter with his
ground-floor flats in the corridor that led off the hallway. cat?
I hadn’t seen him around the flats before, but even in the darkness I could tell there
was something about him. He wasn’t at all nervous; in fact, there was a quiet, calm
confidence about him. From the shadows he fixed me with a steady, curious, intelligent stare.
It was as if he was saying: ‘So who are you and what brings you here?’

From The Da Vinci Code by Dan Brown


Practise
Renowned curator Jacques Saunière staggered through the vaulted archway of the museum’s question:
Grand Gallery. He lunged for the nearest painting he could see, a Caravaggio. Grabbing the
guilded frame, the seventy-six-year-old man heaved the masterpiece toward himself until it How does the
tore from the wall and Saunière collapsed backward in a heap beneath the canvas. writer use
As he had anticipated, a thundering iron gate fell nearby, barricading the entrance to language to
the suite. The parquet floor shook. Far off, an alarm began to ring. describe the
The curator lay a moment, gasping for breath, taking stock. I am still alive. He curator’s anxiety?
crawled out from under the canvas and scanned the cavernous space for somewhere to hide.
A voice spoke, chillingly close. ‘Do not move.’
On his hands and knees, the curator froze, turning his head slowly.
Only fifteen feet away, outside the sealed gate, the mountainous silhouette of his
attacker stared through the iron bars. He was broad and tall, with ghost-pale skin and thinning
white hair. His irises were pink with dark red pupils. The albino drew a pistol from his coat
and aimed the barrel through the bars, directly at the curator. ‘You should not have run.’ His
accent was not easy to place. ‘Now tell me where it is.’
‘I told you already,’ the curator stammered, kneeling defenceless on the floor of the
gallery. ‘I have no idea what you are talking about!’

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Word types:
The sentences below have been split into parts. Can you identify the term for each word?

Word types: Noun (subject), noun (object), pronoun (subject), pronoun (object), adjective, article,
verb, adverb, conjunction, preposition.

1. The / dog / ran / into / the / road / and / the / car / just / missed / it.

2. We / are having / a / big / party, / so / you / must come.

3. The / big / bear / escaped / from / the / zoo / and / was / never / seen / again.

4. The / dancers / were / so / shocked / they / had to stop / the / show.

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Work your way across the rows for a top band analytical answer
Use a quotation Use speech marks Embed Use an adjective in Use a verb in your Use an adverb in your
quotations your explanation explanation explanation
Explain the effect of Explain the effect of Explain the effect Explain the effect Explain the effect of Explain the effect of
a single words in an adverb or of a verb of a simile or alliteration onomatopoeia
LOTS of detail adjective metaphor
Explain the effect of Explain the effect of Explain the effect Explain the effect Explain the effect of Explain the effect of
an oxymoron hyperbole of anaphora of pathetic fallacy metonymy or
personification synecdoche
Explain the effect of Make another Make Make connections Use new words Explain the overall
the writer’s use of a suggestion on the connections between the from the thesaurus effect of the piece
semantic field same quotation between the writer’s language or your knowledge because of the writer’s
writer’s language devices organiser in your language choices
choices analysis

Write ‘this implies’ Write ‘this Write ‘this Write ‘this Write ‘this further Write ‘this intimates’
highlights’ reinforces’ emphasizes’ emphasises’
Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence:
One of the first While on the Despite… Although… The most Throughout the poem/
powerful moments surface… interesting thing novel/ play/ extract….
in the play/ novel/ underneath about…
poem/extract is….
Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence: Start a sentence:
To emphasise a To reinforce a sense On the one In some ways … Not only… but… The poem/novel/play
sense of… the of… the writer hand… yet on questions the idea of….
writer the other

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Q1 Write ‘S’ next to the similes and ‘M’ next to the metaphors below.
a) She was a fraying cable of tension and anger, which could snap at any moment.….
b) The glassy eye of the lake watched us in silent judgement. …..
c) Like a flock of tired ducks, we clustered around our teacher, who had brought us
snacks to keep us going on the journey. …..
d) His eyes were hot coals, burning fiercely at the vision he saw before him. …..

Q2 What impression of the sky is the writer trying to create with the metaphors below?

The night sky was a cloth of violet silk scattered with gemstones.

…………………………………………………………………………………………

…………………………………………………………………………………………

…………………………………………………………………………………………

Q3 Read the texts below. How does the use of analogy in the second text make it more
effective?
A running tap wastes around 6 litres A running tap wastes the equivalent
of water for every minute it’s left of seventeen cups of tea for every
running. minute it’s left running.

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

………………………………………………………………………………………….

…………………………………………………………………………………………..

………………………………………………………………………………………….

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Q4 For each extract, circle the technique being used. Then explain one effect that the
technique creates.

a) “The computer grumbled into life, before smugly informing me that it was starting
on six hours of updates.”
Personification / alliteration / onomatopoeia
…………………………………………………………………………....................
……………………………………………………………………………………….
b) “The buzz and the chatter of the students ruined the tranquillity of the scene.”

Personification / alliteration / onomatopoeia


………………………………………………………………………………………
………………………………………………………………………………………

c) “Bag a bargain at Brigson’s – Portsmouth’s Premier Pig Farm!”

Personification / alliteration / onomatopoeia


………………………………………………………………………………………
………………………………………………………………………………………
Q5 Underline one example of personification and one example of alliteration in this
advert, then explain their effect on the reader on the lines below.

A Call for Heroic Hikers!


Are you a fearsome fell-runner? Or maybe you just enjoy long strolls through the hills?
Whatever your ability, we want you to sign up for our 40-mile Wilderness Walk, taking place
in the mountainous forest above Tennerton. If you train hard, you’ll not only get fit, but
triumph over a challenging foe and raise lots of money for charities in the local area.
To answer the cry of the hills and get involved, visit the council’s website.

Effect of personification: ……………………………………………………………….


…………………………………………………………………………………………..
Effect of alliteration: …………………………………………………………………...

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…………………………………………………………………………………………

Q6 Find an example in the extract below of each of the following descriptive techniques.

The air smelt of scorched grass. I could feel the blistering sun burning into my skin as
I trudged slowly through the prickly, dry vegetation, my heavy load cutting cruel lines
into my drooping shoulders. In the distance, the air shimmered in the waves with the
heat. I felt as if I were underwater, constantly being pulled back by the tidal drag of
the temperature, every step an effort, every breath a trial.

Descriptive adjectives: …………………………………………………………………

Describing different senses: ……………………………………………………………

Descriptive verbs: ………………………………………………………………………

Imagery: ………………………………………………………………………………..

Q7 Circle which extract is the better example of descriptive writing and explain your
answer using examples from the text.
i)
My first football match was great. The sights and sounds were amazing.

ii)

I remember my first football match so clearly: the sound of the fans as loud as
ten jet engines; the emerald green pitch; and the buzzing, electric atmosphere.
I’ll never forget it.

Extract i) / ii) is the most descriptive because …………………………………..


…………………………………………………………………………………………..
………………………………………………………………………………………….
…………………………………………………………………………………………..
…………………………………………………………………………………………..
………………………………………………………………………………………….

16
This question will ask you to analyse how the writer has used structure in the text. It will
look something like the example below:

0 3

You now need to think about the whole of the Source.


This text is from the opening of a novel.
How has the writer structured the text to interest you as a reader?
You could write about:
 what the writer focuses your attention on at the beginning
 how and why the writer changes this focus as the Source develops
 any other structural features that interest you.
[8 marks]

 Do not spend too long on this question – no more than 10 minutes.


 Identify specific structural techniques accurately.
 Specific effects nothing too general. Focus on effect of structure, relating it back to
TOP the text.
TIPS  Keep focussed on structure.
:  Don’t tell the examiner what the technique means – they will know.
 Go straight to analysis – don’t put an introduction unless it is definitely going to pick
up marks about structure analysis.

Activities to help you practise for Question 3 Tick when


complete
TEST Use the ‘test yourself’ section to practise analysing structure.
DESIGN Design a poster of the 5 key questions to ask about structure. Learn
them!
GLOSSARY Learn the key terminology in the glossary and practise identifying the
structure in different fictional texts.
CREATE Create a mind map of key terms and find examples in a range of texts.

17
This extract is from the opening of a novel by Daphne du Maurier. Although written in 1936 it is set in the
past. In this section a coach and horses, with its passengers, is making its way through Cornwall to
Jamaica Inn.
Jamaica Inn
It was a cold grey day in late November. The weather had changed overnight, when a backing wind
brought a granite sky and a mizzling rain with it, and although it was now only a little after two o’clock in
the afternoon the pallor of a winter evening seemed to have closed upon the hills, cloaking them in mist.
It would be dark by four. The air was clammy cold, and for all the tightly closed windows it penetrated
the interior of the coach. The leather seats felt damp to the hands, and there must have been a small
crack in the roof, because now and again little drips of rain fell softly through, smudging the leather and
leaving a dark-blue stain like a splodge of ink.
The wind came in gusts, at times shaking the coach as it travelled round the bend of the road, and in the
exposed places on the high ground it blew with such force that the whole body of the coach trembled
and swayed, rocking between the high wheels like a drunken man.
The driver, muffled in a greatcoat to his ears, bent almost double in his seat in a faint endeavour to gain
shelter from his own shoulders, while the dispirited horses plodded sullenly to his command, too broken
by the wind and the rain to feel the whip that now and again cracked above their heads, while it swung
between the numb fingers of the driver.
The wheels of the coach creaked and groaned as they sank into the ruts on the road, and sometimes they
flung up the soft spattered mud against the windows, where it mingled with the constant driving rain,
and whatever view there might have been of the countryside was hopelessly obscured.
The few passengers huddled together for warmth, exclaiming in unison when the coach sank into a
heavier rut than usual, and one old fellow, who had kept up a constant complaint ever since he had
joined the coach at Truro, rose from his seat in a fury; and, fumbling with the window-sash, let the
window down with a crash, bringing a shower of rain upon himself and his fellow-passengers. He thrust
his head out and shouted up to the driver, cursing him in a high petulant voice for a rogue and a
murderer; that they would all be dead before they reached Bodmin if he persisted in driving at breakneck
speed; they had no breath left in their bodies as it was, and he for one would never travel by coach again.
Whether the driver heard him or not was uncertain: it seemed more likely that the stream of reproaches
was carried away in the wind, for the old fellow, after waiting a moment, put up the window again,
having thoroughly chilled the interior of the coach, and, settling himself once more in his corner,
wrapped his blanket about his knees and muttered in his beard.
His nearest neighbour, a jovial, red-faced woman in a blue cloak, sighed heavily, in sympathy, and, with a
wink to anyone who might be looking and a jerk of her head towards the old man, she remarked for at
least the twentieth time that it was the dirtiest night she ever remembered, and she had known some;
that it was proper old weather and no mistaking it for summer this time; and, burrowing into the depths
of a large basket, she brought out a great hunk of cake and plunged into it with strong white teeth.
Mary Yellan sat in the opposite corner, where the trickle of rain oozed through the crack in the roof.
Sometimes a cold drip of moisture fell upon her shoulder, which she brushed away with impatient
fingers.
She sat with her chin cupped in her hands, her eyes fixed on the window splashed with mud and rain,
hoping with a sort of desperate interest that some ray of light would break the heavy blanket of sky, and
18
but a momentary trace of that lost blue heaven that had mantled Helford yesterday shine for an instant
as a forerunner of fortune
0 3
You now need to think about the whole of the Source.
This text is from the opening of a novel.
How has the writer structured the text to interest you as a reader?
You could write about:
 what the writer focuses your attention on at the beginning
 how and why the writer changes this focus as the Source develops
 any other structural features that interest you.
[8 marks]
Step 1: Pick 3-4 different techniques that you think are effective in relation to the question.

Top Tip: Do not keep writing about the same technique for each paragraph. Structural devices include:
 Whole text: narrative perspectives, openings, development, endings, character introductions, setting
analysis
 Paragraph: shifts in action, the effects of different paragraph lengths
 Sentence: how sentence construction affects our feelings

Step 2: Identify specific techniques the writer has used within the structure.

Step 3: Explain and analyse why the writer has used this structure and the effect it creates.

Top Tip: Do not make general statements that could be about any text. Keep referring back to the effect in relation
to the specific text in the paper.

What should you think about?


Location
Where am I?
Setting
Protagonist
Who is here?
Character
1st/2nd/3rd person narration
Narrative voice
Whose views
Narrative perspective
am I hearing?
Omniscient narrator
Unreliable narrator
Introduction
Conclusion/Denouement
Chronological structure
How is time
Climax/Climactic moment
being used?
Flashback
Flashforward
Foreshadow
Topic sentence
Summary
How is the Pattern/Sequence
extract
Connection
organised?
Repetition
Repeated motif

19
Setting (Character and Place)
 Deductive: moving from a general description or topic to a specific description or topic
 Inductive: moving from a specific description or topic to a general description or topic
 Beginning: the opening of a text
 Ending: the end of a text
 Exposition: where the writer reveals information to the reader about the character, setting or past

Plot
 Chronological: events presented in the order in which they occurred
 Rising action: events or incidents designed to build to a plot climax
 Catalyst: the addition of an element that precipitates or speeds up events
 Climax: the culmination of events into an intense and/or significant moment
 Falling action: events after a climax, before the end
 Resolution/Denouement: the final part of a plot, where all strands are drawn together and resolved
 Flashback: a scene set in a time earlier than the time in the main plot
 Foreshadowing: a warning or indication of a future event
 Precursor: something that comes before a similar thing; a forerunner
 Dialogue: speech
 Dual narrative: where a plot is told by two narrators

Theme
 Juxtaposition: two contrasting images or ideas presented alongside each other
 Repetition: an idea, word or series of words that are repeated
 Bookending: when a text begins and ends with the same words, sentence or idea

Character
 Narrator: a character/voice who tells the story
 First person: a story told by and including a narrator - using ‘I’
 Second person: addressing the reader as ‘you’
 Third person: a story told by a narrator about others – using ‘he’/’she’
 Omniscient: an all-knowing (knows all feelings, thoughts and events) narrator
 Dialogue: speech

Elements of grammar and punctuation


 Main clause: a clause, with both a subject and a verb, that can stand alone
 Dependent clause: a clause, with both a subject and a verb, that is dependent on a main clause to make
sense
 Preposition: a phrase that indicates place or time
 Adverbial: a phrase that gives additional detail to a clause – how something occurs
 Fragment: a word or group of words written as a sentence despite not having a main clause
 Discourse marker: word or phrase that indicates changes of time, place or topic
 Paragraph: a section of writing, usually focused on one theme or idea
 Topic sentence: a sentence that expresses the main idea of the paragraph in which it occurs – often the
opening sentence of the paragraph
 Full stop: the mark that indicates the end of a sentence
 Question mark: the mark that indicates the end of a question
 Exclamation mark: the mark that indicates an exclamation (a loud, often sudden sound)
 Colon: the mark proceeding a list, quotation, expansion or explanation
 Semi-colon: the mark that joins two independent sentences that are linked in meaning
 Ellipsis: the mark that indicates missing information or information to come
 Bracket: the mark used to add an aside or additional information 20
 Dash: the mark used to link, whilst drawing emphasis to, the words following it
Key question 1: What is the extract about?
– Where is the extract taking place?
– Who is in the extract?
– What time is it?
– What is the weather like?
– Where would this extract happen in a novel?
– What would happen immediately before and after this extract?

Key question 2: What is it really about? Or: What is the writer really doing here?

– Are characters being introduced? How are they?


– Is there a sudden change in the events in the extract?
– Is some key piece of information being revealed?
– Is a character going on a journey?
– Is there a consequence happening to a character?
– What are the physical descriptions of the character?
– What do they say?
– Are there any comments made by another character?
– What are the actions of the character?

Key question 3: How does the reader’s feelings change in the extract?

– How do we feel when we read the extract?


– Do we like the character?
– Do we feel sorry for them?
– Do we feel the same throughout the extract or do our feelings change?
– How do we feel at the start of the extract compared to the end?

Key question 4: How does it all link together?

– Is anything Repeated? – it happens again


– Is anything Reflected? - it is connected in someway
– Is anything Inverted? - it’s opposite is used
– Is anything Mirrored? - it happens again or it is copied in a different way

Key question 5: Why is the writer using structure to make you feel something?
– Why does the writer want you to feel this way about the character?
– Why does the writer use all the structural devices looked at to make an
impact on the reader?

21
Mark scheme:
This question assesses how the writer has structured a text.
Structural features can be:
 at a whole text level eg. beginnings / endings / perspective shifts;
 at a paragraph level eg. Topic change / aspects of cohesion;
 at a sentence level when judged to contribute to whole structure.
AO2: Explain, comment on and analyse how writers use structure to achieve effects and influence
readers, using relevant subject terminology to support their views
Level 4 Shows detailed and perceptive understanding of structural features:
Detailed, perceptive analysis • Analyses the effects of the writer’s choice of structural features
7-8 marks • Selects a judicious range of examples
• Makes sophisticated and accurate use of subject terminology
Level 3 Shows clear understanding of structural features:
Clear, relevant explanation • Explains clearly the effects of the writer’s choice of structural features
5-6 marks • Selects a range of relevant examples
• Makes clear and accurate use of subject terminology
Level 2 Shows some understanding of structural features:
Some understanding • Attempts to comment on the effect of structural features
and comment • Selects some appropriate examples
3-4 marks • Makes some use of subject terminology, mainly appropriately
Level 1 Shows simple awareness of structural features:
Simple, limited • Offers simple comment on the effect of structural features
comment • Selects simple references or examples
1-2 marks • Makes simple use of subject terminology, not always appropriately
AO2 content may include the effect of ideas such as:
 the overall structure of a journey – moving through place
 the change of structural focus from outside to inside
 the consistent reminder of the weather, recapitulated through the text
 narrowing down the focus to the individual characters.
Level 4 paragraph: The text, about a journey, is structured to also take the reader on a journey: from the general to the specific;
from the outside to the inside; from the weather, through the coach, the driver and horses, to the passengers.

There is also a constant reminder of the weather which permeates each part – the ‘little drips of rain’ that came through the roof
and, later, ‘the rain oozed through the crack in the roof’ onto Mary’s shoulder – so the reader is constantly made wet and
uncomfortable, just like the passengers. Around the middle of the extract, the outside and the inside are made to coincide when
the old man opens the window – this also moves the focus of the reader to the inside of the coach

The text narrows down to take the reader from the countryside of Cornwall – the wide ‘granite sky’ and the evening which
‘closed upon the hills’, to the inside of Mary Yellan’s head as she contemplates the weather and hopes for a ‘momentary trace’ of
‘blue heaven’.

Level 3 paragraph: The main structure of the story, which begins with the weather, moves from the outside with the rain and
wind that came ‘in gusts’ and which includes the driver and horses, to the inside of the coach and the individual characters who
are the passengers. The reader is able to understand the extremity of the weather and then go inside to the relative calm and
meet the passengers. As the extract develops it changes the focus from the weather to the driver, then the horses, then the
coach, then the passengers. The reader’s experience narrows down to Mary Yellan, whose thoughts take the reader back to the
weather.

Level 2 paragraph: The writer writes about the weather in the first paragraph which makes the reader feel they were there in the
cold and rain. It then moves on to focus on some individuals, so we can pick them out – the driver and then the people inside the
coach, making the reader feel more comfortable but still feeling the drips of rain. So overall the writer changes the focus from
outside to inside.
22
Level 1 paragraph: The text is written in paragraphs which makes it easy to read. It tells us about the weather first which sets the
scene and then moves on to tell us about the coach.
Read the extract Question
From The Book Thief By Markus Zusek
First up is something white. Of the blinding kind. Practise question:
Some of you are most likely thinking that white is not really a
colour and all of that tired sort of nonsense. Well I’m here to You now need to think about the whole of the
tell you that it is. White is without question a colour, and source.
personally, I don’t think you want to argue.
A REASSURING ANNOUNCEMENT The extract is from the opening of the novel.
Please, be calm, despite that previous threat.
I am all bluster – How has the writer structured the text to
I am not violent. I am not malicious. interest you as a reader?
I am a result.
You could write about:
Yes, it was white.
1. The narrative voice
It felt as though the whole globe was dressed in snow. Like it
had pulled it on, the way you pull on a jumper. Next to the 2. The location and setting
train line, footprints were sunken to their shins. Trees wore 3. The way characters are introduced
blankets of ice. 4. The way action and events develop
As you might expect, someone had died. throughout the extract.
They couldn’t just leave him on the ground. For now it 5. Paragraphs and sentence length.
wasn’t such a problem, but very soon, the track ahead would
be cleared and the train would need to move on. You could use What-How-Why for this question
There were two guards.
There was a mother and her daughter. One corpse.  You must think about what the overall
The mother, the girl and the corpse remained stubborn and feeling is and what structural devices have
silent. been used.
*  Answer how does the writer use these
‘Well, what else do you want me to do?’ structural devices to create an overall
The guards were tall and short. The tall one always spoke
feeling? What are the techniques that
first, though he was not in charge. He looked at the smaller,
rounder one. The one with the juicy red face. stand out? Try to find at least three
‘Well,’ was the response, ‘we can’t just leave them like this, different techniques.
can we?’  Analyse why you think of a certain feeling
The tall one was losing patience. ‘Why not?’ is created. Why has the writer chosen
And the smaller one damn near exploded. He looked up at the these words in particular – what are the
tall one’s chin and cried, ‘Spinnst du? Are you stupid!?’ The connotations of each word?
abhorrence on his cheeks was growing thicker by the
moment. His skin widened. ‘Come on,’ he said, traipsing
through the snow. ‘We’ll carry all three of them back on if
we have to. We’ll notify the next stop.’
As for me, I had already made the most elementary of
mistakes. I can’t explain to you the severity of my self-
disappointment. Originally, I’d done everything right: I
studied the blinding, white-snow sky who stood at the
window of the moving train. I practically inhaled it, but still,
I wavered. I buckled – I became interested. In the girl.
Curiosity got the better of me, and I resigned myself to stay
as long as my schedule allowed, and I watched.
Twenty-three minutes later, when the train was stopped, I
climbed out with them.
A small soul was in my arms. I stood a little to the right.

23
Read the extract Question
From The Shakespeare Curse by J.L. Carrell
Practise question:
PROLOGUE
You now need to think about the whole of the
November, 1606 Source.
Hampton Court Palace
This text is from the opening of a novel.
Wrapped in a gown of blue-green velvet trimmed with gold, a
queen’s crown on his head, the boy sat drowsing in the throne How has the writer structured the text to
near the centre of the Great hall, just at the edge of the light. interest you as a reader?
Tomorrow, it would be the king who sat there. Not a player king,
but the real one, His Majesty King James 1 of England and V1 You could write about:
of Scotland. Tonight, however, some-one among the players had
been needed to sit there and see just what the king on his throne
 what the writer focuses your attention
would see as Mr Shakespeare’s new Scottish play, blood-
spattered and witch-haunted, conjured a rite of nameless evil. on at the beginning
The boy, who was not in this scene, had volunteered.  how and why the writer changes this
But the rehearsal had been unaccountably delayed, stretching focus as the Source develops
deep into the frigid November night, until it was almost as cold  any other structural features that
inside the unheated hall as it was in the frost-rimed courtyards interest you.
below. The heavy gown, though, was warm, as the hours
crawled on, the boy found it hard to keep his eyes open.
Well out of the torchlight illuminating the playing area,
a grizzled man-at-arms in a worn leather jerkin, gaunt as a figure
of famine, leaned against the wall at the edge of the tapestry,
seeming to drowse as well.
At last, movement stirred in the haze of light. Three
figures, cloaked head to toe in black, skimmed in a circle about
the cauldron set in the centre of the hall, their voices melding
into a single chant somewhere between a moan and a hiss.
‘What is it you do?’ rasped the player king as he entered,
eyes wide with horror.
The answer whined through the echoing hall like the
nearly human sound of the wind, or maybe the restless dead,
seeking entry at the eaves: A deed without a name.
Not long afterwards, a phalanx of children, eerily
beautiful, had drifted into the light, gliding one by one past the
throne. In the rear, the smallest held up a mirror.
On the throne, the boy-queen sat bolt upright.
Against the wall, barely visible in the outer darkness, the
old soldier’s eyes flickered open.
A few moments later, the boy slid from the throne and
melted into the darkness at the back of the hall. Behind him, the
man followed like an ill-fitting shadow.

24
Read the extract Question
From Street Cat Bob by James Bowen
Practise question:
Fellow Travellers
You now need to think about the whole of
There’s a famous quote I read somewhere. It says we are all given the Source.
second chances every day of our lives. They are there for the taking.
It’s just that we don’t usually take them. This text is from the opening of a novel.
I spent a big chunk of my life proving the truth of that
quote. But then, in the early spring of 2007, that finally began to How has the writer structured the text to
change. It was then that I made friends with Bob. Looking back on interest you as a reader?
it, I see that it might have been his second chance too.
I first met him on a gloomy Thursday evening in March. You could write about:
There was a hint of frost in the air that night when me and my
friend Belle arrived back at my new flat in Tottenham, north
 what the writer focuses your
London, after a day busking around Covent Garden.
The strip lighting in the hallway was broken, but as we attention on at the beginning
made our way to the stairwell I noticed a pair of glowing eyes in the  how and why the writer changes
gloom. When I heard a gentle meow I realised what it was. this focus as the Source develops
Edging closer, I could see a ginger cat curled up on a  any other structural features that
doormat outside one of the ground-floor flats in the corridor that led interest you.
off the hallway.
I hadn’t seen him around the flats before, but even in the
darkness I could tell there was something about him. He wasn’t at
all nervous; in fact, there was a quiet, calm confidence about him.
From the shadows he fixed me with a steady, curious, intelligent
stare. It was as if he was saying: ‘So who are you and what brings
you here?’
I couldn’t resist kneeling down and greeting him.
‘Hello mate. I’ve not seen you before. Do you live here?’
He just looked at me, as if he was still checking me out.
I stroked his neck, but couldn’t feel a collar. Perhaps he was
a stray. London had plenty of those.
I could feel that his coat was in a poor state. From the way
he was rubbing against me, he was also clearly in need of a bit of
tender loving care, or TLC.
‘Poor chap. He’s really thin,’ I said, looking up at Belle,
who was waiting by the foot of the stairs.
She sighed, knowing I had a weakness for cats.
‘James, he must belong to whoever lives there,’ she said,
nodding towards the door of the nearest flat. ‘He’s probably just
waiting for them to come home and let him in. Let’s go.’
Reluctantly, I followed her up the stairs. I knew I couldn’t
just pick up the cat and take it home with me. What if it did belong
to the person living in that flat?
Besides, the last thing I needed right now was a pet that
needed care. I was a recovering drug addict and failed musician
living a hand-to-mouth life in sheltered housing. Taking care of
myself was hard enough.

25
Read the extract Question
From The Diving Bell and the Butterfly By Jean-Dominique Bauby
Practise question:
Through the frayed curtain at my window, a warm glow announces the
break of day. My heels hurt, my head weighs a ton, and something like You now need to think about the whole
of the Source.
a giant invisible cocoon holds my whole body prisoner. My room
emerges slowly from the gloom. I linger over every item: photos of This text is from the opening of a novel.
loved ones, my children's drawings, posters, the little tin cyclist sent by
a friend the day before the Paris–Roubaix bike race, and the IV pole How has the writer structured the text
hanging over the bed where I have been confined these past six to interest you as a reader?
months, like a hermit crab dug into his rock. You could write about:

No need to wonder very long where I am, or to recall that the life I
once knew was snuffed out Friday, the eighth of December, last year.  what the writer focuses your
attention on at the beginning
Up until then I had never even heard of the brain stem. I've since  how and why the writer changes
learned that it is an essential component of our internal computer, the this focus as the Source
inseparable link between the brain and the spinal cord. That day I was develops
brutally introduced to this vital piece of anatomy when a  any other structural features that
cerebrovascular accident took my brain stem out of action. In the past, interest you.
it was known as a "massive stroke," and you simply died. But
improved resuscitation techniques have now prolonged and refined the
agony. You survive, but you survive with what is so aptly known as
"locked-in syndrome." Paralyzed from head to toe, the patient, his
mind intact, is imprisoned inside his own body, unable to speak or
move. In my case, blinking my left eyelid is my only means of
communication.

Of course, the party chiefly concerned is the last to hear the good news.
I myself had twenty days of deep coma and several weeks of
grogginess and somnolence before I truly appreciated the extent of the
damage. I did not fully awake until the end of January. When I finally
surfaced, I was in Room 119 of the Naval Hospital at Berck-sur-Mer,
on the French Channel coast -- the same Room 119, infused now with
the first light of day, from which I write.

An ordinary day. At seven the chapel bells begin again to punctuate the
passage of time, quarter hour by quarter hour. After their night's
respite, my congested bronchial tubes once more begin their noisy
rattle. My hands, lying curled on the yellow sheets, are hurting,
although I can't tell if they are burning hot or ice cold. To fight off
stiffness, I instinctively stretch, my arms and legs moving only a
fraction of an inch. It is often enough to bring relief to a painful limb.

26
Read the extract Question
From The Fault in Our Stars By John Green
Practise question:
A boy was staring at me.
You now need to think about the whole of the
I was quite sure I'd never seen him before. Long and leanly Source.
muscular, he dwarfed the molded plastic elementary school chair
he was sitting in. Mahogany hair, straight and short. He looked This text is from the opening of a novel.
my age, maybe a year older, and he sat with his tailbone against
the edge of the chair, his posture aggressively poor, one hand How has the writer structured the text to
half in a pocket of dark jeans. interest you as a reader?

You could write about:


I looked away, suddenly conscious of my myriad insufficiencies.
I was wearing old jeans, which had once been tight but now
sagged in weird places, and a yellow T-shirt advertising a band I
 what the writer focuses your attention
didn't even like anymore. Also my hair: I had this pageboy
haircut, and I hadn't even bothered to, like, brush it. on at the beginning
 how and why the writer changes this
Furthermore, I had ridiculously fat chipmunked cheeks, a side focus as the Source develops
effect of treatment. I looked like a normally proportioned person  any other structural features that
with a balloon for a head. This was not even to mention the interest you.
cankle situation. And yet—I cut a glance to him, and his eyes
were still on me.

It occurred to me why they call it eye contact.

I walked into the circle and sat down next to Isaac, two seats
away from the boy. I glanced again. He was still watching me.
Look, let me just say it: He was hot. A nonhot boy stares at you
relentlessly and it is, at best, awkward and, at worst, a form of
assault. But a hot boy . . . well.

I pulled out my phone and clicked it so it would display the time:


4:59. The circle filled in with the unlucky twelve-to-eighteens,
and then Patrick started us out with the serenity prayer: God,
grant me the serenity to accept the things
I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the
wisdom to know the difference. The guy was still staring at me. I
felt rather blushy.

Finally, I decided that the proper strategy was to stare back.


Boys do not have a monopoly on the Staring Business, after all.
So I looked him over as Patrick acknowledged for the
thousandth time his ball-lessness etc., and soon it was a staring
contest. After a while the boy smiled, and then finally his blue
eyes glanced away. When he looked back at me, I flicked my
eyebrows up to say, I win.

27
Read the extract Question
From Watership Down by Richard Adams
Practise question:
The primroses were over. Toward the edge of the wood, where the ground
became open and sloped down to an old fence and a brambly ditch beyond, You now need to think about the
only a few fading patches of pale yellow still showed among the dog's whole of the Source.
mercury and oak tree roots. On the other side of the fence, the upper part of
the field was full of rabbit holes. In places the grass was gone altogether and This text is from the opening of a
everywhere there were clusters of dry droppings, through which nothing but novel.
the ragwort would grow. A hundred yards away, at the bottom of the slope,
ran the brook, no more than three feet wide, half choked with kingcups, How has the writer structured the
watercress and blue brooklime. The cart track crossed by a brick culvert and text to interest you as a reader?
climbed the opposite slope to a five-barred gate in the thorn hedge. The gate
You could write about:
led into the lane.

The May sunset was red in clouds, and there was still half an hour to
 what the writer focuses your
twilight. The dry slope was dotted with rabbits -- some nibbling at the thin
attention on at the
grass near their holes, others pushing further down to look for dandelions or
perhaps a cowslip that the rest had missed. Here and there one sat upright on beginning
an ant heap and looked about, with ears erect and nose in the wind. But a  how and why the writer
blackbird, singing undisturbed on the outskirts of the wood, showed that there changes this focus as the
was nothing alarming there, and in the other direction, along the brook, all Source develops
was plain to be seen, empty and quiet. The warren was at peace.  any other structural features
that interest you.
At the top of the bank, close to the wild cherry where the blackbird sang,
was a little group of holes almost hidden by brambles. In the green half-light,
at the mouth of one of these holes, two rabbits were sitting together side by
side. At length, the larger of the two came out, slipped along the bank under
cover of the brambles and so down into the ditch and up into the field. A few
moments later the other followed. The first rabbit stopped in a sunny patch
and scratched his ear with rapid movements of his hind leg. Although he was
a yearling and still below full weight, he had not the harassed look of most
"outskirters" -- that is, the rank and file of ordinary rabbits in their first year
who, lacking either aristocratic parentage or unusual size and strength, get sat
on by their elders and live as best they can -- often in the open -- on the edge
of their warren. He looked as though he knew how to take care of himself.
There was a shrewd, buoyant air about him as he sat up, looked around and
rubbed both front paws over his nose. As soon as he was satisfied that all was
well, he laid back his ears and set to work on the grass.

His companion seemed less at ease. He was small, with wide, staring eyes
and a way of raising and turning his head which suggested not so much
caution as a kind of ceaseless, nervous tension. His nose moved continually,
and when a bumblebee flew humming to a thistle bloom behind him, he
jumped and spun round with a start that sent two nearby rabbits scurrying for
holes before the nearest, a buck with black-tipped ears, recognized him and
returned to feeding.

28
This question will ask you to analyse to what extend do you agree with a statement about
the text - usually how the writer has used methods (language, structure, sentences, focus,
perspective, character and setting) to create a certain impression within the text. You will
need to find evidence evaluating and either proving/disproving the statement. It will look
something like the example below:

0 4

Focus this part of your answer on the second part of the Source from line 18 to the end.
A student, having read this section of the text said: “The writer brings the very different
characters to life for the reader. It is as if you are inside the coach with them.”
To what extent do you agree?
In your response, you could:

 write about your own impressions of the characters


 evaluate how the writer has created these impressions
 support your opinions with references to the text.
[20 marks]

 Spend 25-30 minutes on this question.


 Only use the specified area of the text.
 Keep focussed on the question and referring back to key ideas in the statement.
TOP  Identify specific methods – use correct terminology.
TIPS  Specific effects nothing too general - keep relating back to the text.
:  Don’t tell the examiner what the technique/ term means – they will know.
 Remember to use all the skills language and structural analysis skills you have gained
in questions 2 and 3 and put them all into this question.
 You will waste time if you re-write out the statement you are analysing, the
examiner will know it, just evaluate what aspects you agree/disagree with.
 This is a READING question – do not confuse it with Paper 2 Section B.

Activities to help you practise for Question Tick when


complete
TEST Use the ‘test yourself’ section to practise analysing methods.
GLOSSARY Write a glossary of terms that show you are EVALUATING.
CREATE Create a mind map of key method a text can use to convey meaning

29
This extract is from the opening of a novel by Daphne du Maurier. Although written in 1936 it is set in the
past. In this section a coach and horses, with its passengers, is making its way through Cornwall to
Jamaica Inn.
Jamaica Inn
It was a cold grey day in late November. The weather had changed overnight, when a backing wind
brought a granite sky and a mizzling rain with it, and although it was now only a little after two o’clock in
the afternoon the pallor of a winter evening seemed to have closed upon the hills, cloaking them in mist.
It would be dark by four. The air was clammy cold, and for all the tightly closed windows it penetrated
the interior of the coach. The leather seats felt damp to the hands, and there must have been a small
crack in the roof, because now and again little drips of rain fell softly through, smudging the leather and
leaving a dark-blue stain like a splodge of ink.
The wind came in gusts, at times shaking the coach as it travelled round the bend of the road, and in the
exposed places on the high ground it blew with such force that the whole body of the coach trembled
and swayed, rocking between the high wheels like a drunken man.
The driver, muffled in a greatcoat to his ears, bent almost double in his seat in a faint endeavour to gain
shelter from his own shoulders, while the dispirited horses plodded sullenly to his command, too broken
by the wind and the rain to feel the whip that now and again cracked above their heads, while it swung
between the numb fingers of the driver.
The wheels of the coach creaked and groaned as they sank into the ruts on the road, and sometimes they
flung up the soft spattered mud against the windows, where it mingled with the constant driving rain,
and whatever view there might have been of the countryside was hopelessly obscured.
The few passengers huddled together for warmth, exclaiming in unison when the coach sank into a
heavier rut than usual, and one old fellow, who had kept up a constant complaint ever since he had
joined the coach at Truro, rose from his seat in a fury; and, fumbling with the window-sash, let the
window down with a crash, bringing a shower of rain upon himself and his fellow-passengers. He thrust
his head out and shouted up to the driver, cursing him in a high petulant voice for a rogue and a
murderer; that they would all be dead before they reached Bodmin if he persisted in driving at breakneck
speed; they had no breath left in their bodies as it was, and he for one would never travel by coach again.
Whether the driver heard him or not was uncertain: it seemed more likely that the stream of reproaches
was carried away in the wind, for the old fellow, after waiting a moment, put up the window again,
having thoroughly chilled the interior of the coach, and, settling himself once more in his corner,
wrapped his blanket about his knees and muttered in his beard.
His nearest neighbour, a jovial, red-faced woman in a blue cloak, sighed heavily, in sympathy, and, with a
wink to anyone who might be looking and a jerk of her head towards the old man, she remarked for at
least the twentieth time that it was the dirtiest night she ever remembered, and she had known some;
that it was proper old weather and no mistaking it for summer this time; and, burrowing into the depths
of a large basket, she brought out a great hunk of cake and plunged into it with strong white teeth.
Mary Yellan sat in the opposite corner, where the trickle of rain oozed through the crack in the roof.
Sometimes a cold drip of moisture fell upon her shoulder, which she brushed away with impatient
fingers.
She sat with her chin cupped in her hands, her eyes fixed on the window splashed with mud and rain,
hoping with a sort of desperate interest that some ray of light would break the heavy blanket of sky, and
but a momentary trace of that lost blue heaven that had mantled Helford yesterday shine for an instant
30
as a forerunner of fortune
0 4

Focus this part of your answer on the second part of the Source from line 18 to the end.
A student, having read this section of the text said: “The writer brings the very different
characters to life for the reader. It is as if you are inside the coach with them.”
To what extent do you agree?
In your response, you could:

 write about your own impressions of the characters


 evaluate how the writer has created these impressions
 support your opinions with references to the text.
[20 marks]
Step 1: Disregard the area that is not specified in the question.

Step 2: Highlight key ideas in the question and decide what is actually being asked.

“The writer brings the very different characters to life for the reader. It is as if you are inside the coach with them.”

How has the writer used language, structure, sentences, focus, perspective, character and setting to create
convincing/interesting characters for the readers?

Step 3: Highlight and annotate a range of features used that relate to the task.

Step 4: Spend 5 minutes planning your answer.

Step 5: Evaluate how successful the writer is in using a range of methods that create an effect - either proving or
disproving the statement in the question.

Top Tip: Use a range of methods (e.g. one paragraph about language, one paragraph about structure/ sentences,
one paragraph about characters/setting and one paragraph about perspective).

Top Tip: Spend about 5 minutes per paragraph with detailed evaluating and analysis.

Step 6: Spend 5 mins checking and editing –


Have you evaluated?
Have you mentioned the writer and specific methods/techniques?
Have you mentioned the effect created on the reader?
Have you used specific references/quotes to the text? 31
Have you only used the specified area?
Mark scheme:
AO4 Evaluate texts critically and support this with appropriate textual references

Level 4 Shows perceptive and detailed evaluation:


Perceptive, detailed • Evaluates critically and in detail the effect(s) on the reader
evaluation • Shows perceptive understanding of writer’s methods
16-20 marks • Selects a judicious range of textual detail
• Develops a convincing and critical response to the focus of the statement
Level 3 Shows clear and relevant evaluation:
Clear, relevant • Evaluates clearly the effect(s) on the reader
evaluation • Shows clear understanding of writer’s methods
11-15 marks • Selects a range of relevant textual references
• Makes a clear and relevant response to the focus of the statement
Level 2 Shows some attempts at evaluation:
Some evaluation • Makes some evaluative comment(s) on effect(s) on the reader
6-10 marks • Shows some understanding of writer’s methods
• Selects some appropriate textual reference(s)
• Makes some response to the focus of the statement
Level 1 Shows simple, limited evaluation:
Simple, limited • Makes simple, limited evaluative comment(s) on effect(s) on reader
1-5 marks • Shows limited understanding of writer’s methods
• Selects simple, limited textual reference(s)
• Makes a simple, limited response to the focus of the statement
AO4 Content may include the evaluation of ideas such as:
 the passengers as a unified group, all in the same predicament
 the individual characteristics of the passengers, their actions and reactions to the situation
they are in
 interactions between the characters – the dynamic between the characters
 how the writer has used, for example, language, structure, tone to make an impression on
the reader.

Level 4 paragraph: We might think that the passengers are a unified group because the writer refers to them
collectively: ‘The few passengers huddled together for warmth’, but their actions suggest how different they are.
The ‘old fellow’ is short tempered and pompous with a sense of his own importance, but also ridiculous in his
actions. The writer’s choice of the word ‘petulant’ shows how his behaviour was childish. He also makes rash
statements – that he would ‘never travel by coach again’ which the reader knows is of no interest to the driver
he is swearing at. In the end, he is reduced to muttering. These complexities help the reader understand the
stresses of the journey and the different sides to the man.

Level 3 paragraph: The writer brings the characters alive by making them behave and react differently. The ‘old
fellow’ from Truro loses his temper with the driver but makes things worse for everybody by opening the
window and ‘bringing a shower of rain on himself and his fellow passengers’. This amuses the reader because
the man is angry and foolish. We also understand the irony of his actions and how pointless it is cursing the
driver, who the reader knows is doing his best. The writer makes the man seem unreasonable and out of control
by the use of excessive, almost violent words like ‘rogue’ and ‘murderer’.

Level 2 paragraph: The characters are good because the writer includes detail to make them seem different.
The ‘old fellow’ makes us laugh because he is so angry that he is ‘fumbling’ with the window sash and so gets
everybody wet. The writer makes us understand that he is also grumpy by telling us that he had ‘kept up a
constant complaint ever since he joined the coach from Truro’.

Level 1 paragraph: The characters are good because you can see what they are like. The old man is funny 32
because he opens the window and makes everybody wet. Also the writer makes us understand he is angry by
saying ‘he rose from his seat in a fury’.
Read the extract Question
From The Book Thief By Markus Zusek
First up is something white. Of the blinding kind. Practise question:
Some of you are most likely thinking that white is not really a
colour and all of that tired sort of nonsense. Well I’m here to Focus this part of your answer on the
tell you that it is. White is without question a colour, and second part of the Source from line 24 to
personally, I don’t think you want to argue. the end.
A REASSURING ANNOUNCEMENT
Please, be calm, despite that previous threat.
I am all bluster – A student, having read this section of the
I am not violent. I am not malicious. text said: “The writer creates an
I am a result. atmosphere of uncertainty for the reader.”
Yes, it was white.
It felt as though the whole globe was dressed in snow. Like it To what extent do you agree?
had pulled it on, the way you pull on a jumper. Next to the
train line, footprints were sunken to their shins. Trees wore
blankets of ice. In your response, you could:
As you might expect, someone had died.  write about your own impressions of
They couldn’t just leave him on the ground. For now it the characters
wasn’t such a problem, but very soon, the track ahead would  evaluate how the writer has created
be cleared and the train would need to move on. this atmosphere
There were two guards.
There was a mother and her daughter. One corpse.  support your opinions with
The mother, the girl and the corpse remained stubborn and references to the text.
silent.
*
‘Well, what else do you want me to do?’
The guards were tall and short. The tall one always spoke
first, though he was not in charge. He looked at the smaller,
rounder one. The one with the juicy red face.
‘Well,’ was the response, ‘we can’t just leave them like this,
can we?’
The tall one was losing patience. ‘Why not?’
And the smaller one damn near exploded. He looked up at the
tall one’s chin and cried, ‘Spinnst du? Are you stupid!?’ The
abhorrence on his cheeks was growing thicker by the
moment. His skin widened. ‘Come on,’ he said, traipsing
through the snow. ‘We’ll carry all three of them back on if
we have to. We’ll notify the next stop.’
As for me, I had already made the most elementary of
mistakes. I can’t explain to you the severity of my self-
disappointment. Originally, I’d done everything right: I
studied the blinding, white-snow sky who stood at the
window of the moving train. I practically inhaled it, but still,
I wavered. I buckled – I became interested. In the girl.
Curiosity got the better of me, and I resigned myself to stay
as long as my schedule allowed, and I watched.
Twenty-three minutes later, when the train was stopped, I
climbed out with them.
A small soul was in my arms. I stood a little to the right.

33
Read the extract Question
From The Shakespeare Curse by J.L. Carrell
Practise question:
PROLOGUE
Focus this part of your answer on the
November, 1606 second part of the Source from line 15 to
Hampton Court Palace the end.
Wrapped in a gown of blue-green velvet trimmed with gold, a
queen’s crown on his head, the boy sat drowsing in the throne A student, having read this section of the
near the centre of the Great hall, just at the edge of the light. text said: “The writer creates an
Tomorrow, it would be the king who sat there. Not a player king, atmosphere of mystery for the reader.”
but the real one, His Majesty King James 1 of England and V1
of Scotland. Tonight, however, some-one among the players had To what extent do you agree?
been needed to sit there and see just what the king on his throne
would see as Mr Shakespeare’s new Scottish play, blood-
spattered and witch-haunted, conjured a rite of nameless evil. In your response, you could:
The boy, who was not in this scene, had volunteered.  write about your own
But the rehearsal had been unaccountably delayed, stretching impressions of the characters/
deep into the frigid November night, until it was almost as cold setting
inside the unheated hall as it was in the frost-rimed courtyards  evaluate how the writer has
below. The heavy gown, though, was warm, as the hours
crawled on, the boy found it hard to keep his eyes open. created this atmosphere
Well out of the torchlight illuminating the playing area,  support your opinions with
a grizzled man-at-arms in a worn leather jerkin, gaunt as a figure references to the text.
of famine, leaned against the wall at the edge of the tapestry,
seeming to drowse as well.
At last, movement stirred in the haze of light. Three
figures, cloaked head to toe in black, skimmed in a circle about
the cauldron set in the centre of the hall, their voices melding
into a single chant somewhere between a moan and a hiss.
‘What is it you do?’ rasped the player king as he entered,
eyes wide with horror.
The answer whined through the echoing hall like the
nearly human sound of the wind, or maybe the restless dead,
seeking entry at the eaves: A deed without a name.
Not long afterwards, a phalanx of children, eerily
beautiful, had drifted into the light, gliding one by one past the
throne. In the rear, the smallest held up a mirror.
On the throne, the boy-queen sat bolt upright.
Against the wall, barely visible in the outer darkness, the
old soldier’s eyes flickered open.
A few moments later, the boy slid from the throne and
melted into the darkness at the back of the hall. Behind him, the
man followed like an ill-fitting shadow.

34
Read the extract Question
From The Diving Bell and the Butterfly By Jean-Dominique Bauby
Practise question:
Through the frayed curtain at my window, a warm glow announces the
break of day. My heels hurt, my head weighs a ton, and something like Focus this part of your answer on
a giant invisible cocoon holds my whole body prisoner. My room the second part of the Source from
emerges slowly from the gloom. I linger over every item: photos of line 11 to the end.
loved ones, my children's drawings, posters, the little tin cyclist sent by
a friend the day before the Paris–Roubaix bike race, and the IV pole A student, having read this section
hanging over the bed where I have been confined these past six of the text said: “The writer brings
months, like a hermit crab dug into his rock. the characters to life for the
reader. It is as if you feeling the
No need to wonder very long where I am, or to recall that the life I same emotions.”
once knew was snuffed out Friday, the eighth of December, last year.
To what extent do you agree?
Up until then I had never even heard of the brain stem. I've since
learned that it is an essential component of our internal computer, the In your response, you could:
inseparable link between the brain and the spinal cord. That day I was  write about your own
brutally introduced to this vital piece of anatomy when a impressions of the
cerebrovascular accident took my brain stem out of action. In the past, character/emotions
it was known as a "massive stroke," and you simply died. But  evaluate how the writer has
improved resuscitation techniques have now prolonged and refined the created these impressions
agony. You survive, but you survive with what is so aptly known as  support your opinions with
"locked-in syndrome." Paralyzed from head to toe, the patient, his references to the text.
mind intact, is imprisoned inside his own body, unable to speak or
move. In my case, blinking my left eyelid is my only means of
communication.

Of course, the party chiefly concerned is the last to hear the good news.
I myself had twenty days of deep coma and several weeks of
grogginess and somnolence before I truly appreciated the extent of the
damage. I did not fully awake until the end of January. When I finally
surfaced, I was in Room 119 of the Naval Hospital at Berck-sur-Mer,
on the French Channel coast -- the same Room 119, infused now with
the first light of day, from which I write.

An ordinary day. At seven the chapel bells begin again to punctuate the
passage of time, quarter hour by quarter hour. After their night's
respite, my congested bronchial tubes once more begin their noisy
rattle. My hands, lying curled on the yellow sheets, are hurting,
although I can't tell if they are burning hot or ice cold. To fight off
stiffness, I instinctively stretch, my arms and legs moving only a
fraction of an inch. It is often enough to bring relief to a painful limb.

35
Read the extract Question
From The Fault in Our Stars By John Green
Practise question:
A boy was staring at me.
Focus this part of your answer on the
I was quite sure I'd never seen him before. Long and leanly second part of the Source from line 13 to
muscular, he dwarfed the molded plastic elementary school chair the end.
he was sitting in. Mahogany hair, straight and short. He looked
my age, maybe a year older, and he sat with his tailbone against
the edge of the chair, his posture aggressively poor, one hand A student, having read this section of the
half in a pocket of dark jeans. text said: “The writer shows the self-
conscious nature of the character to the
I looked away, suddenly conscious of my myriad insufficiencies. reader.”
I was wearing old jeans, which had once been tight but now
sagged in weird places, and a yellow T-shirt advertising a band I
To what extent do you agree?
didn't even like anymore. Also my hair: I had this pageboy
haircut, and I hadn't even bothered to, like, brush it.
In your response, you could:
Furthermore, I had ridiculously fat chipmunked cheeks, a side  write about your own
effect of treatment. I looked like a normally proportioned person impressions of the characters
with a balloon for a head. This was not even to mention the  evaluate how the writer has
cankle situation. And yet—I cut a glance to him, and his eyes
were still on me.
created this impression
 support your opinions with
It occurred to me why they call it eye contact. references to the text.

I walked into the circle and sat down next to Isaac, two seats
away from the boy. I glanced again. He was still watching me.
Look, let me just say it: He was hot. A non-hot boy stares at you
relentlessly and it is, at best, awkward and, at worst, a form of
assault. But a hot boy . . . well.

I pulled out my phone and clicked it so it would display the time:


4:59. The circle filled in with the unlucky twelve-to-eighteens,
and then Patrick started us out with the serenity prayer: God,
grant me the serenity to accept the things
I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the
wisdom to know the difference. The guy was still staring at me. I
felt rather blushy.

Finally, I decided that the proper strategy was to stare back.


Boys do not have a monopoly on the Staring Business, after all.
So I looked him over as Patrick acknowledged for the
thousandth time his ball-lessness etc., and soon it was a staring
contest. After a while the boy smiled, and then finally his blue
eyes glanced away. When he looked back at me, I flicked my
eyebrows up to say, I win.

36
Read the extract Question
From Watership Down by Richard Adams
Practise question:
The primroses were over. Toward the edge of the wood, where the ground
became open and sloped down to an old fence and a brambly ditch beyond, Focus this part of your answer
only a few fading patches of pale yellow still showed among the dog's on the second part of the
mercury and oak tree roots. On the other side of the fence, the upper part of Source from line 20 to the end.
the field was full of rabbit holes. In places the grass was gone altogether and
everywhere there were clusters of dry droppings, through which nothing but
the ragwort would grow. A hundred yards away, at the bottom of the slope, A student, having read this
ran the brook, no more than three feet wide, half choked with kingcups, section of the text said: “The
watercress and blue brooklime. The cart track crossed by a brick culvert and writer creates a sense of
climbed the opposite slope to a five-barred gate in the thorn hedge. The gate unease in the two main
led into the lane. rabbits.”
The May sunset was red in clouds, and there was still half an hour to
twilight. The dry slope was dotted with rabbits -- some nibbling at the thin To what extent do you agree?
grass near their holes, others pushing further down to look for dandelions or
perhaps a cowslip that the rest had missed. Here and there one sat upright on In your response, you could:
an ant heap and looked about, with ears erect and nose in the wind. But a  write about your own
blackbird, singing undisturbed on the outskirts of the wood, showed that there impressions of the
was nothing alarming there, and in the other direction, along the brook, all
characters/rabbits
was plain to be seen, empty and quiet. The warren was at peace.
 evaluate how the writer
At the top of the bank, close to the wild cherry where the blackbird sang, has created these
was a little group of holes almost hidden by brambles. In the green half-light, impressions
at the mouth of one of these holes, two rabbits were sitting together side by  support your opinions
side. At length, the larger of the two came out, slipped along the bank under with references to the
cover of the brambles and so down into the ditch and up into the field. A few
moments later the other followed. The first rabbit stopped in a sunny patch
text.
and scratched his ear with rapid movements of his hind leg. Although he was
a yearling and still below full weight, he had not the harassed look of most
"outskirters" -- that is, the rank and file of ordinary rabbits in their first year
who, lacking either aristocratic parentage or unusual size and strength, get sat
on by their elders and live as best they can -- often in the open -- on the edge
of their warren. He looked as though he knew how to take care of himself.
There was a shrewd, buoyant air about him as he sat up, looked around and
rubbed both front paws over his nose. As soon as he was satisfied that all was
well, he laid back his ears and set to work on the grass.

His companion seemed less at ease. He was small, with wide, staring eyes
and a way of raising and turning his head which suggested not so much
caution as a kind of ceaseless, nervous tension. His nose moved continually,
and when a bumblebee flew humming to a thistle bloom behind him, he
jumped and spun round with a start that sent two nearby rabbits scurrying for
holes before the nearest, a buck with black-tipped ears, recognized him and
returned to feeding.

37
Nineteen Eighty-Four By George Orwell

It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. Winston Smith, his chin nuzzled into his
breast in an effort to escape the vile wind, slipped quickly through the glass doors of Victory Mansions, though
not quickly enough to prevent a swirl of gritty dust from entering along with him.

The hallway smelt of boiled cabbage and old rag mats. At one end of it a coloured poster, too large for indoor
display, had been tacked to the wall. It depicted simply an enormous face, more than a metre wide: the face of a
man of about forty-five, with a heavy black moustache and ruggedly handsome features. Winston made for the
stairs. It was no use trying the lift. Even at the best of times it was seldom working, and at present the electric
current was cut off during daylight hours. It was part of the economy drive in preparation for Hate Week. The
flat was seven flights up, and Winston, who was thirty-nine and had a varicose ulcer above his right ankle, went
slowly, resting several times on the way. On each landing, opposite the lift shaft, the poster with the enormous
face gazed from the wall. It was one of those pictures which are so contrived that the eyes follow you about
when you move. BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU, the caption beneath it ran.

Inside the flat a fruity voice was reading out a list of figures which had something to do with the production of
pig-iron. The voice came from an oblong metal plaque like a dulled mirror which formed part of the surface of
the right-hand wall. Winston turned a switch and the voice sank somewhat, though the words were still
distinguishable. The instrument (the telescreen, it was called) could be dimmed, but there was no way of
shutting it off completely. He moved over to the window: a smallish, frail figure, the meagreness of his body
merely emphasized by the blue overalls which were the uniform of the Party. His hair was very fair, his face
naturally sanguine, his skin roughened by coarse soap and blunt razor blades and the cold of the winter that had
just ended.

Question One (4 marks)


List four things you learn about Winston.
Question Two (8 marks)
Re-read the section of the extract that begins with “The hallway smelt of boiled cabbage …(At the start of
paragraph 2) to … the caption beneath it ran.” (At the end of paragraph 2)

How does the writer use language here to create a particular atmosphere?
You could include the writer’s choice of:
1. Words and phrases
2. Imagery and language techniques
3. Sentence structure and length

Question Three (8 marks)


You now need to think about the whole of the source.
The extract is from the opening of the novel.

How has the writer structured the text to interest you as a reader?
Question Four (20 marks)
A student, having read this extract, said: "The writer creates a bizarre and intriguing environment".
To what extent do you agree with this statement?

38
This question will ask you to write a description/narrative based on a picture stimulus or
theme/scenario:

0 5

You are going to enter a creative writing competition.


Your entry will be judged by a panel of people of your own age.
Either: Write a description suggested by this picture:

Or: Write the opening part of a story about a place that is severely affected by the
weather.
(24 marks for content and organisation 16 marks for technical accuracy)
[40 marks]
 Spend 45 minutes on this question.
 Spend 5 minutes planning, 35 minutes writing and 5 minutes checking.
 Remember your audience and purpose.
TOP  Use a range of language and structural techniques.
TIPS:  Use ambitious vocabulary.
 You must use paragraphs.
 Use a range of punctuation and sentence structures accurately.
 Try to spell words accurately, however you will gain more marks for using
ambitious vocabulary than lose for inaccurate spelling.

Activities to help you practise for Question 5 Tick when


complete
TEST Use the ‘test yourself’ section to practise the writing style questions.

CREATE Create a list of interesting ways to start a sentence and use each sentence starter at
least once in a practise piece of writing.
LIST Research and list as many different pieces of punctuation as you can. Write out the
different rules for that piece of punctuation and an example for each rule. Use as
many different pieces of punctuation in a practise piece of writing.
CREATE Use the glossary you have created for Question 2 and use as many as you can in a
practise piece of writing.

39
Mark scheme:
Content and Organisation
AO5 Content and Organisation
Communicate clearly, effectively and imaginatively, selecting and adapting tone, style and register for different forms,
purposes and audiences.
Organise information and ideas, using structural and grammatical features to support coherence and cohesion of
texts.

Level 4 Upper Content: • Register is convincing and compelling for audience


19-24 marks Level 4 • Assuredly matched to purpose
Compelling, 22-24 • Extensive and ambitious vocabulary with sustained crafting of linguistic devices
Convincing marks Organisation: • Varied and inventive use of structural features
• Writing is compelling, incorporating a range of convincing and complex ideas
• Fluently linked paragraphs with seamlessly integrated discourse markers
Lower Content:• Register is convincingly matched to audience
Level 4 • Convincingly matched to purpose
19-21 • Extensive vocabulary with conscious crafting of linguistic devices
marks Organisation:• Varied and effective structural features
• Writing is highly engaging with a range of developed complex ideas
• Consistently coherent use of paragraphs with integrated discourse markers
Level 3 Upper Content: • Register is consistently matched to audience
13-18 marks Level 3 • Consistently matched to purpose
Consistent, 16-18 • Increasingly sophisticated vocabulary and phrasing, chosen for effect with a range of successful linguistic devices
Clear marks Organisation: • Effective use of structural features
• Writing is engaging, using a range of clear connected ideas
• Coherent paragraphs with integrated discourse markers
Content: • Register is generally matched to audience
Lower • Generally matched to purpose
Level 3 • Vocabulary clearly chosen for effect and appropriate use of linguistic devices
13-15 Organisation:• Usually effective use of structural features
marks • Writing is engaging, with a range of connected ideas
• Usually coherent paragraphs with range of discourse markers
Level 2 Upper Content: • Some sustained attempt to match register to audience
7-12 marks Level 2 • Some sustained attempt to match purpose
Some 10-12 • Conscious use of vocabulary with some use of linguistic devices
success marks Organisation: • Some use of structural features
• Increasing variety of linked and relevant ideas
• Some use of paragraphs and some use of discourse markers
Lower Content: • Attempts to match register to audience
Level 2 • Attempts to match purpose
7-9 marks • Begins to vary vocabulary with some use of linguistic devices
Organisation: • Attempts to use structural features
• Some linked and relevant ideas
• Attempt to write in paragraphs with some discourse markers, not always
appropriate
Level 1 Upper Content: • Simple awareness of register/audience
1-6 marks Level 1 • Simple awareness of purpose
Simple, 4-6 marks • Simple vocabulary; simple linguistic devices
Limited Organisation: • Evidence of simple structural features
• One or two relevant ideas, simply linked
• Random paragraph structure
Lower Content: • Occasional sense of audience
Level 1 • Occasional sense of purpose
1-3 marks • Simple vocabulary
Organisation: • Limited or no evidence of structural features
• One or two unlinked ideas
• No paragraphs

40
Technical Accuracy
AO6 Technical Accuracy
Candidates must use a range of vocabulary and sentence structures for clarity, purpose and
effect, with accurate spelling and punctuation. (This requirement must constitute 20% of the
marks for each specification as a whole.)

• Sentence demarcation is consistently secure and consistently accurate


Level 4 • Wide range of punctuation is used with a high level of accuracy
13-16 marks • Uses a full range of appropriate sentence forms for effect
• Uses Standard English consistently and appropriately with secure control of complex
grammatical structures
• High level of accuracy in spelling, including ambitious vocabulary
• Extensive and ambitious use of vocabulary
Level 3 • Sentence demarcation is mostly secure and mostly accurate
9-12 marks • Range of punctuation is used, mostly with success
• Uses a variety of sentence forms for effect
• Mostly uses Standard English appropriately with mostly controlled grammatical
structures
• Generally accurate spelling, including complex and irregular words
• Increasingly sophisticated use of vocabulary
Level 2 • Sentence demarcation is mostly secure and sometimes accurate
5-8 marks • Some control of a range of punctuation
• Attempts a variety of sentence forms
• Some use of Standard English with some control of agreement
• Some accurate spelling of more complex words
• Varied use of vocabulary
Level 1 • Occasional use of sentence demarcation
1-4 marks • Some evidence of conscious punctuation
• Simple range of sentence forms
• Occasional use of Standard English with limited control of agreement
• Accurate basic spelling
• Simple use of vocabulary

Either: Focus on the big picture and then zoom in for each paragraph (you can draw a box around
interesting sections to focus your writing on - see the example below)

Or: Focus on a small section and zoom out for each paragraph.

Paragraph 1
Paragraph 2
Paragraph 3
Paragraph 4

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 At least 10 interesting words
 Simile
 Metaphor
 Onomatopoeia
 Personification
 Adjectives
 Interesting verbs and adverbs
 Short sentence for impact
 Sentence starting with –ed
 Sentence starting with -ly
 Sentence starting with -ing
 Strong opening and concluding paragraph
 Range of punctuation
 Range of sentence structures
 Use language techniques
 Range of paragraph lengths for effect

I have used ___ different types of punctuation.


The most interesting piece of vocabulary I have used is _____ .
My favourite sentence starter is __________.
The shortest sentence I have used was ____ words.
The longest sentence I have used was ____ words.
The shortest paragraph I have used was ____ lines.
The longest paragraph I have used was ____ lines.
I have used ________ to make my structure interesting.
The language techniques I have used are:

WWW –
EBI –

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