UNITED STATES DEPARTMENT

UNITED STATES CITIZENSHIP AND IMMIGRATION SERVICES

STATE OF NEW YORK

STATEMENT IN SUPPORT OF I-360 PETITION.

1. On the 3rd week of January 2020, I received an invitation to a birthday party

by my friend. The party was on a weekend being 24/01/2020. I arrived at

the party with a birthday present for the celebrant in hand. It wasn’t

something big but had beautiful decorations. I looked around for my friend

and found her chatting with some guests. I hugged her, wished her a happy

birthday and handed her the present I got for her.I found a spot to sit while

listening to the song being played. Then a guy walked up to me holding two

bottles of soda and handed me one. I thanked him and asked if he could

keep me company since he noticed that I was seated all alone. He

introduced himself as and I told him mine as well. He said I didn’t look

Yoruba since he was one as well. We became almost inseparable at the

party, sharing experiences and totally enjoying each other’s company away

from the fun of the party itself. Before we parted ways after the party, he
 asked that we exchange contacts. His phone battery had died so he asked

that I give him my card, with a promise to call me.

2. Three days later, I was just settling in at home after a gym session in the

evening when my phone rang. I picked up on the second ring and the male

voice on the other end introduced himself as Rafiu. He apologized for

taking too long to reach me after the party and said he had to go back to

New York. Apparently, he had other things to attend to the days after the

party. I told him it was nothing and the conversation picked up from there.

On that call, I got to know that we were both mutual friends with the

celebrant whom we graced on this occasion. We talked about our country

and other random topics. What was supposed to be a brief call, lasted for

hours before we finally went to bed but not without a mutual agreement to

keep in touch.

3. We soon fell into a new routine of constant communication of calls, text,

and chat. What happened was that with each conversation, it felt like there

was more to talk about. Rafiu is vast. Talking with him never had a dull

moment. He knew about just any topic from politics, to football, to tech to

finance. He was just an all-rounder and it drew me in the most.

4. Few months down the constant communication, we started getting

personal. It all started with a question Rafiu asked about my family. We

then took turns to ask each other some revealing questions like family size,

financial goals, genotype, etc. Out of nowhere, he asked if it was OK for him

to visit me. I agreed and we fixed a date.

5. It was on a weekend. Rafiu drove down from New York to Maryland to visit

me. Initially, he asked to lodge in a hotel but I refused because I stayed

alone and since we had been talking for months and had started getting

personal with each other, it was only wise I volunteered my home for our

first official meeting. I thought to myself that it would be a good time to get

to know him personally. We went out a few times while he was at my

house. He was a great company. There was no difference with the guy I had

been talking to on the phone and the personality he showed. He was kind

to me and didn’t want me stressing myself to cook so we ate out almost all

the time. He would go out and not return without a gift for me or flowers.

For the few days he spent with me, I felt special. When he was leaving, I

promised him I would pay a return visit.

6. We never stopped talking. In fact, Rafiu made it a duty to call in the

morning, check on me while at work and we never ended the day without
 reviewing our day. It felt like we were already in an unspoken relationship.

Few weeks later, he asked me to visit him. He had already prepared our

local dish before I arrived and as soon as I showered, he served me. He

pampered me so much and didn’t let me lift a finger. On the day I was to

leave, he asked me to be his girlfriend. I agreed.

7. We had a good relationship for the months we officially dated. Ours was a

kind of distant relationship. He knew I was married before but never judged

me, instead he was everything my ex-husband wasn’t to me. He was calm,

supportive, homely, and never lifted a finger on me. The only thing he did

that I felt I could live with was smoking and drinking. He promised to quit

and I believed him because he started making efforts to.

8. I made efforts to visit him at least once every month to make sure the

relationship worked. I wanted another shot at happiness and Rafiu seemed

to be the right man. I promised myself to do whatever it took to make it

work.

9. Whenever I visited, he treated me to dates at nice restaurants, took me

around to see the city, go shopping and do fun stuff together in general.

Everything was perfect with him and I knew nothing could go wrong.
10.After eight (8) months of officially dating, on my birthday, Rafiu treated me

to an intimate dinner in New York where he asked me to marry him. It was

the best day of my life. I couldn’t think of any better way to round up my

birthday than saying YES to this man who had gradually become an integral

part of my life.

While we dated, it was more convenient for me to visit New York so after

the wedding, Rafiu asked that I join him in New York since he was already

established there and I was just starting out in my own career. I moved into

his home at Horton Street, New York.

11.Rafiu was really everything to me. He helps me with domestic chores

around the house. He would pick up groceries on his way home from work

and sometimes even volunteer to make dinner. He knew how much I

enjoyed his meals. Sometimes he would come home with a gift or two for

me. He was so observant. Things I would casually mention during

conversations with him, sometimes I would wake up and see them solved

or bought. I felt really loved but somewhere in me I felt things were too

perfect to be true. Don’t blame me.

12.One day, Rafiu came home really late after our dinner time. Normally, he

would come in immediately but on that day, he was on the phone in his car
 for more than 30 minutes. When he came in, he reeked of alcohol. I tried to

ask where he was coming from and why he drank so much but he didn’t

even spare me a word nor touch my food. He went straight to bed. The

next day, he came home earlier than normal, bearing a gold bracelet gift for

me and apologized for the previous day. He said it was work stress.

13.After that event, he started keeping late nights and excusing himself to

answer long calls. I would ask what was going on and he would say it was

work and I shouldn’t get worried about it. Gradually, things began to

change. He spent more late nights and sometimes came home smelling like

a chimney. He drank unapologetically and wouldn’t let me get close to his

phone.

14.Although he apologized when he came to himself, things were never the

same again. My husband wouldn’t touch me. This was someone who

couldn’t take his hands off me while we dated and in the early days of our

marriage. He even gradually stopped helping around the house and would

snap at me each time I ask him to help get groceries on his way back.

15.This continued to happen, and I was beginning to get used to not having

Rafiu around or him helping me with things as he used to. I even had to

learn how to pleasure myself when I crave his touch. He denied me. With
 all this happening, I never thought for one day to cheat on my husband.

Our relationship deteriorated further and communication between us

became more difficult. He gets irritated very easily whenever I try to talk to

him, gives me a cold stare or outrightly avoids conversations with me. This

made me wonder what I did to warrant the sudden cold treatment towards

me from my once loving husband . A lot of thoughts started going through

my head, but I was always hoping that things would get better between us

with time.

16. The situation in our marriage got from bad to worse when I came home

one day and saw my husband moving his duvet to the guest room. The next

day and subsequently, he wouldn’t come home at all and when he did,

there was no explanation of his whereabouts. The first time he stayed out

without coming home for 3 days, I was worried and scared that something

bad might have happened to him. I called several times but met a voicemail

tone. He even blocked me from reaching him on social media. Those 3 days

were the longest days of my life. I was worried sick. When he returned, he

walked into the guest room which had become his room without a word. I

tried to ask him where he had been all along, but he snapped at me and

said that I had no right to ask him such questions and whatever he does
 with his life should never concern me. I was so surprised and started to

wonder how my once clingy and sweet husband became this mean person

who I can’t talk to any longer.

17. My husband and I lived in the house like complete strangers. He stopped

picking up bills. He stopped helping out around the house, even his clothes

were dumped in the laundry room till he was ready to wash them.

Sometimes when he comes back home demanding food and I tell him it

isn’t ready yet, he starts to abuse me verbally, calling me lazy and telling

me that I am of no use around the house. He is always quick to tell me that

it is best he reports me and has me sent back to Nigeria. Whenever he does

this, I keep quiet and just go into the room to cry and never talk back to

him.

18. The neglect and verbal abuse persisted and I endured everything. All I

wanted was for my marriage to be back to what it used to be and I prayed

fervently so that God would intervene. The verbal abuse soon escalated to

physical abuse.

19.There was a day he came home and started his usual verbal attack on me. I

tried to keep quiet but I could not hold it in any longer. I talked back to him.

Immediately, he punched me on my face and I fell to the ground, then he

 started to kick me. He told me to never ever talk back to him and whenever

it happened again, he was going to kill me and no one would find my

corpse. I was so scared that day, It was like I was looking at a monster. On

October 29, 2022, I came home and noticed that my husband had moved

out of the house. I was so relieved that the torture is finally over. Right now

I am trying to forge ahead and get therapy.

20. I entered this marriage without any knowledge that my husband had

narcissistic behavior. I was deceived by my husband into this marriage to

believe that he loved me and I would forever be the center of his world and

I think I am qualified to put my application forward.

21. I make the above statement freely and with the intention that it be relied

upon immigration proceedings and with the knowledge that I may be called

upon to testify as to the truth or otherwise my statements as stated in my

affidavit.

Sincerely,
_______________________________

Sworn before me ………. day of …………, 2022