Speeches, Groups and Workshops

THE LIFE PURPOSE INSTITUTE
SPIRITUAL COACHING METHOD™
SPEECHES, GROUPS AND WORKSHOPS
© Fern Gorin and The Life Purpose Institute 1994-2022 (ver 06.22) Speeches, Groups & Workshops L - 1
Learning Objectives
This chapter will include:
1. How to create a winning speech, group, or workshop that attracts paying clients
2. How to find places to speak and teach a group or workshop
3. Setting up speeches, workshops, and classes
4. Preparing for your speech, workshop, or group
5. Sample speeches, groups, and workshops
2 - L Speeches, Groups & Workshops © Fern Gorin and The Life Purpose Institute 1994-2022 (ver 06.22)
1. How to Create a Winning Speech, Group, or Workshop
that Attracts Paying Clients
First, create your winning speech. Then, after creating that, you can expand your
content into a workshop or ongoing group.
To do that you will need these things:
1. A list of your target audience’s pain points. You turn those into an assessment
that participants will fill out.
2. Your solutions to the pain points, which you will keep in mind while writing your
speech.
3. A catchy title which presents either your solutions or something positive that you
can offer to the group.
Examples:
a) 7 Secrets to a Successful Relationship
b) Living Life with More Passion, Purpose, and Meaning
c) 5 Ways to Achieve Optimal Health and Vitality
d) 7 Ways to Reduce Your Stress and Create More Peace
e) Become a Great Parent – 10 Powerful Strategies
f) Life Makeover: How to Reinvent Your Life in 30 Days or Less
4. Some tools and perspectives you uniquely have that will make you stand
out. Do not mention common sense things like the importance of eating
healthfully or exercise or staying in balance. Give the audience some tips they
might not be aware of.
Note: You can advise and educate people during your speech, group, or workshop
based on your qualifications and/or reputable information.
5. Here are some ideas for giving people a sample taste of what you offer in a
teaser talk:
Have the participants fill out your assessment with common pain points and let
them “sit with their pain.”
Get the audience participating around their pain points by asking, “How many of
you checked off 3 things? How many checked more than 8 things?” Have them
share their pain points with someone in a partner exercise if possible, and then
have people share some with the larger group.
Share a few tools or techniques (but don’t “give away the store”).
Demonstrate with someone one of the techniques you use to show your skill at
working with clients. Do this, of course, only if you are comfortable doing this and
if it’s appropriate for that group.
Share one tool and the let your audience know this is one of many tools you offer
around this topic.
Talk about a past client (without violating confidentiality) who was successful. “I
had a client who ________.”
Share that one of the things you like to do with clients is _________, so they can
see themselves working with you.
Educate them about coaching and the benefits and success of coaching, rather
than speaking positively just about yourself.
Example: “Coaching is known to have amazing results: helping people move forward
in their life more quickly, helping clients make changes that otherwise would have
been difficult to make,” etc:
Partner and group exercises if that’s appropriate. Participants usually enjoy
engaging with each other and sharing their own experience.
Your story, if it’s inspiring to others
Your biography, including that you are a Certified Life Coach (CLC), certified by
the Life Purpose Institute
A special discounted rate that is time-limited or a free complimentary session
that you offer
Now, come up with an outline for your speech, taking into consideration these things,
and then develop your talk from there.
Try it out on a small group at first (this could be family or friends), see how it goes
and then make adjustments to the talk based on the input.
By picking a topic that will meet your niche’s needs, your marketing will be targeted
and attract the ideal clients you want.
The other way to create a winning speech is to target specific groups (e.g., a singles
group at a church), see what their needs are and then develop a speech to meet
those particular needs. You would still need to identify the things previously
described, but targeted to that particular group. This can make for more work as you
may need to come up with a new speech each time.
Creating a Longer Workshop or Group
Now that you have your winning speech, evaluate what needs your target group has
that you could address in a workshop or group. What are their pain points and what
are the solutions?
There are 3 different kinds of groups and workshops:
1. A structured group that has a clear sequence and process

These groups may last a month, 6 – 8 weeks, 6 months, or may be ongoing.
Examples: Discover Your Life Purpose and Find the Work You Love, About Success, a
Life Transition group that parallels the Self-Discovery Process, Break Through Your
Blocks to Success
2. A process-oriented group
In this type of group, people come in with their issues. One person is on the “hot seat”
and gets coached by you, the coach, and then the discussion is opened to the group.
Several (or all) group members get supported each session.
Examples: A women’s support group, people with a common health challenge, new
mothers, a women’s spiritual support group, women who want to lose weight or
improve their health
3. An open-ended group, or sequence of presentations, with variable content

At each session, you present information on a topic of interest to the group.
These tend to be less marketable and provide erratic income, because there isn’t an
ongoing commitment, unless participants subscribe to a series.
Examples: A women’s empowerment series, or a personal or spiritual growth group
with new topics each week, such as Relationships, Health, Spiritual Growth, Life
Balance, etc. (Make sure you come up with catchy titles each week)
2. How to Find Places to Speak and Teach a Group or

Workshop
There are numerous places to speak or give workshops, such as:
1. Professional and social organizations and associations
2. Spiritual and religious organizations – women’s groups, men’s groups, couples’
groups, singles’ groups, youth groups
3. Career and professional groups
4. Learning centers
5. Community colleges and adult education
6. Libraries – they can promote your workshop to their mailing list
7. Networking groups
8. Meetup groups
9. Bookstores – promote your own book or work with management to develop a
reading list relevant to your topic
10. Conventions and trade shows – contact convention centers and professional
associations to get their schedules and guidelines for up to 2 years ahead
11. Health clubs and spas
12. Yoga studios
13. Webinars
14. Organizations that provide programs for special needs or focuses –
entrepreneurs, working moms, former military, creatives, people with disabilities or
ADHD, etc.
15. Meeting rooms at health food stores
16. Schedule and promote your own speeches and workshops
3. Setting up Speeches, Workshops, Groups and Classes
Contacting Organizations Where You Might Speak or Teach
If you are interested in speaking and teaching workshops at churches, organizations,
bookstores, libraries, community colleges, educational centers, etc., there are steps
you can take to ensure you’ll be offered the opportunity to speak and are well
prepared to work with the group involved.
1. Find places where you can speak

Find places where you can connect with your target market. See above for ideas.
2. Do research
Find out more about the organization. Get their newsletter, catalog or bulletin or
search their website to find out what is currently being offered in the way of
speeches, classes and workshops. If the information you need is not in the newsletter,
catalog, bulletin or website, you might call the organization for additional
information. You will need the name of the contact person in order to submit your
proposal, as well as gathering any additional information you need to formulate an
effective proposal.
In researching a particular organization, look also for the following:

What is their demographic – the types of people they attract? How does that
correlate with your target market?
What type of workshops could you do that appeal to their audience and fit with
what they’re offering, but provide something different? For example, many
churches talk about “life purpose,” but they might not address how to find a
career that fits with your purpose.
How long are the speeches and workshops/classes that are usually offered? Are
they a half hour, 2 hours, full day, full weekend, etc.?
How much is the participant charged, if anything, for attending?
Is there something you find special about the organization where you would like
to speak? If so, remember to include this in your introduction.
Doing just a little research can help you pick a topic that’s appropriate to the group
you’re serving and increase your chances of getting your workshop scheduled.
3. Make a list of topics for your speeches or workshops
Come up with a list of 3 – 10 workshop ideas that you can present to the
organization. Make a list of your ideas on your letterhead, including a one-paragraph
blurb describing each one, that you can send or leave behind at a meeting.
4. Contact the organization

If you haven’t already, find out who the right contact person is for setting up
speeches, workshops and classes. When calling that person, do the following:
a. Ask if it’s a good time to talk.
b. Tell them why you’re calling. For example:
“I’m a Life Purpose and Career Coach and would very much like to give a workshop
called ‘Discover Your Life Purpose and Find the Work You Love.’.”
“I’m a Life Coach, and I’d love to give a talk on ‘7 Keys to More Smoothly Navigate
Through Your Life Transitions’.”
c. Acknowledge them or the organization for something special you know about
them.
d. Either make mention of your previous research about what they offer about your
subject matter or ask, for example, “Do you think your church members might be
interested in discovering their life purpose and what career might be most satisfying
to them?” or “Do you think a lot of your members are going through some sort of
transition, like divorce, empty nest, career change or loss of a loved one?”
e. If they’re open to it, arrange an appointment to meet with them in person or by
phone.
5. Meet with the contact person and work out the details
a. At this meeting, discuss their needs and present your list of topic ideas. If they’re
interested, they will probably ask you for one or more of the following:
Speech or workshop description or outline
Course objectives
Your biography
A brief description to put in their newsletter or catalog
You can also discuss when they’re next scheduling workshops (some organizations
schedule months in advance); what marketing they provide and what they expect you
to provide; the number of people usually attending; any fees or costs involved;
logistics such as room set-up, registration, etc.; and give them any information they
need from you.
Discuss speaking fees, if any. It may be a split, such as 50/50%, 60/40% or 40/60%;
a flat fee; or a per-person fee. Fees are often nominal, for example, $25 – 50 per
evening workshop or $100 – 250 for a full day. However, your goal is to promote your
practice, so it’s well worth it, especially when you’re just beginning to build a
practice.
b. Follow up with a thank-you note and materials promised (course description or
outline, course objectives, your biography, catalog copy, etc.). Normally, you’ll need
to submit a one-page proposal with a description of your talk and your bio that can
be put in their bulletin or e-newsletter.
c. Check back with your contact to finalize dates and details. You may have to be
persistent and call or email as many as five to ten times before you reach them or
get a response.
d. Get prepared and enjoy your speech or workshop!
4. Preparing for Your Speech, Workshop, or Group
To prepare for your workshop, finalize your teaching materials and make copies of
your handouts.
Choose the length of your presentation, depending on its purpose. It could be one
evening, several evenings, a half-day, a full day, a weekend, or a multi-week course.
This may be specified by the sponsor.
You can do short “teaser” talks to share material that is of interest to your target
audience and invite them to work with you as a coach. You may not be paid for
these; consider them part of your marketing.

Longer workshops and coaching groups are another way of working with coaching
clients. These can provide another income stream on their own, as well as being an
entrée into individual coaching.
The title for your workshop or speech should be catchy and appeal to your target
Note that in most cases, your presentation will be about a topic that
audience.
addresses the needs and interests of your audience, not about coaching itself.
The Resources section includes an outline of a sample talk, “How to Dramatically
Improve Your Life in 30 Days or Less,” that will allow your listener to sit with their
pain. This could also be adapted with different titles, such as: “How to Navigate More
Smoothly Through Your Life Transitions," or ” “The Art of Change".
The Resources section also includes samples of workshops of various lengths. Use
these as the basis of your workshop or adapt them for your particular topic. As you
develop the outline and script for your workshop, you may also want to develop
materials or handouts to use in the workshop. Remember – if you use any of the
materials from the Life Purpose Institute Coaching Process©, you need to have the
participants sign the Confidentiality/Copyright Agreement, which is in the Resources
section.
Helpful Tip: Before you proceed, make copies of the pages from this section or the
Resources Section that you want to use or refer to and have them available for easy
access during your session planning time.
In preparing to present your workshop…
If you want to use technology, check with your host to see what they have available
and what you need to bring. In many cases, you can have a PowerPoint presentation
on your laptop and connect it to their projection system or a thumb drive that you
can use with their computer system.
Bring the Confidentiality/Copyright Agreement (this is required when you use
materials from the Life Purpose Institute program) and the Interest Survey to
distribute to participants.
You might create a checklist of all the items you need to bring so you don’t forget
anything.
5. Sample, Speeches, Groups, and Workshops
Following are a number of samples of speeches and workshops. These are offered
for you to use or adapt for your own purposes.
Speeches and mini-workshops usually have an introduction, philosophy, group
participation and exercises, education about and promotion of your services, and a
conclusion.
Make sure that you not only have an interesting talk, but that it fully markets your
services. You can give the most wonderful presentation, but if people don’t sign up
immediately for coaching sessions, you’ve left out some essential ingredients from
your talk, such as:
Making mention of your coaching services throughout the talk
Giving them a “teaser” so they want more (if you give too much, they won’t need
more)
Demonstrating your expertise
Talking about some clients you’ve had. “I had a client who..”
Using the phrase: “Coaching is known for amazing results, helping people
move forward in their lives, making changes that otherwise would have been
difficult to make.
Giving a time-limited offer, so they’ll sign up now rather than later, for a
coaching session or follow-up workshop
Having the audience "sit in their pain" by checking off from a list the issues that
apply to them.
Selling indirectly rather than directly for most of the talk. Use lines like, “One of
the things coaching is known for is …,” “I have a client who …,” “This is one of
many techniques I use for …,” “One of the things I like to do with my coaching
clients is …,” “One of the things I found works for my coaching clients is …,” etc.
Customizing Your Own Speech or Workshop
Review the teaser talks and workshops that follow and pick out content that is
appropriate for your speech or workshop.
Develop your own assessment form that would spell out your target market's issues
and help them "sit with their pain." For example, a parenting coach would list out
issues that parents face. If your specialty is moving through crisis, change, and
transition, you would list the major life changes.

If you’re coaching women in mid-life, you would list all the issues mid-life women
face.
Pick out “pain points” from the assessment that you could touch upon in your speech.
Find some really interesting points to share about your topic. You can get ideas from
book titles, chapter titles, and content, as well as searching online or the content of
this manual to get a few ideas.
SAMPLE TEASER TALKS OR WORKSHOPS
The following are 5 outlines of sample teaser talks or workshops:
A Night of Healing Tools
Accelerate Your Personal Growth
How to Dramatically Improve Your Life in 30 Days or Less
7 Effective Strategies for Combating Daily Stress
How to Navigate More Smoothly Through Your Life Transitions
A NIGHT OF HEALING TOOLS
Before the class, make a list of things your participants may want to heal. Create an
assessment form by adding lines or checkboxes for each item for participants to
check off.
1. Introductions
What is healing? Group discussion, then share your definition.
2. Have participants fill out the assessment form (list of things to heal)
Do a partner exercise to share this list.
Do group sharing.
Share your healing tools and use any of the following you’d like to. You decide on the
order and how many of these handouts or exercises to use in your workshop.
Opening Up to Greater Abundance
Connection to God and drawing exercise
Students write down blocks to their spirituality
Demonstrate Voice Dialogue
Demonstrate Spiritual Mastery Process
Intuition exercises: Energy Dynamics and Developing Your Intuition. Send healing
to other group members.
Creating Awareness Around Life Choices handout, partner exercise, and group
discussion
Control and Freedom
Binding Agreements
Group sharing
Have participants write or share with a partner an action plan to move forward with
the healing they started that night.
Do group sharing.
3. Promote your coaching practice

Let them know this evening was a sampling of many healing tools.
If you have issues you still want to resolve, I’m available to help you do that in a
spiritual coaching session.
Mention if you have another workshop or group to follow.
Give a special discount if they sign up that night.
4. Conclusion
Complete the workshop with an exercise or sharing.
ACCELERATE YOUR SPIRITUAL GROWTH IN ONE WEEKEND
(or whatever time period you decide)
Decide how long you want your workshop to be: 2 hours, a day, a weekend, or a 6-
week group. You can do this as a stand-alone workshop, or you can do it as a
support system, like the Success Group.
Introduction
This is a workshop to accelerate your spiritual growth. We’ll be doing this by having
group discussion, having you fill out some handouts, and going through partner and
group exercises.
Warm-Ups with Partner

Share your name and what brings you to this workshop with a partner.
Now, with the same partner, you will have 7 minutes to share your spiritual biography,
starting from your first religious or spiritual experiences and coming up to the present
moment.
Group Introductions
I’d like each person to share with the whole group your name and what brought you
to this class. Also, you’re welcome to share anything about your spiritual background
you’d like to. You have 2 minutes to do that.
First Handout
Please fill out the handout, Your Spiritual Growth Assessment.
Please turn to a partner and share what you learned about yourself by going through
the Spiritual Growth Assessment handout.
Give them a few minutes to complete the handout.
I’d like to talk briefly about some of these points.
Go Over Some of the Points and Elaborate

Please turn to a partner and share how you would know if you had accelerated your
growth in those areas that you checked in the Spiritual Growth Assessment. How
would it show up in your life? What would be the end result?
Group Sharing
These steps can be repeated with several different exercises. You decide on the
order and how many of these handouts or exercises to use in your workshop:
Life and Spiritual Values
Opening Up to Greater Abundance
Connection to God and drawing exercise
Participants write down blocks to their spirituality
Demonstrate Voice Dialogue
Demonstrate Spiritual Mastery Process
Intuition exercises: Energy Dynamics and Developing Your Intuition
Creating Awareness Around Life Choices handout, partner exercise, and group
discussion
Control and Freedom
Discuss communication of our needs and the Embrace Technique
Discuss how to stay connected to God through spiritual practices
Binding Agreements
Talk about compassion and kindness. If the group goes on for more than a day, ask
each person to do an act of kindness for someone in their life.
Another assignment could be to explore spirituality. Ask them to go to new places to
explore their spirituality.
You might have students give you the top 3 issues on Your Spiritual Growth
Assessment handout. Develop lecture points or exercises around those.
If it’s a 6-week class, you can do one night of sharing of their spiritual practices.
Do periodic checks to see if the ratings on their Spiritual Growth Assessment handout
move up during the workshop.
Develop a game plan to put positive intentions into action.
Include your own spiritual tools.
Conclusion
Where are you now that you’ve taken the class. What insights and new learning have
occurred for you during this workshop? Look back at your Spiritual Growth
Assessment. How is it now compared to where you were before?
Do this with partners and then take sharing from the group.
Promote your coaching practice and discuss things that may have arisen during the
class for which coaching would be helpful: blocks, time management, lack of follow-
through, etc.
HOW TO DRAMATICALLY IMPROVE YOUR LIFE
IN 30 DAYS OR LESS
Alternate title:
LIFE MAKEOVER:
HOW TO REINVENT YOUR LIFE IN 30 DAYS OR LESS
Note: This talk or short workshop is mostly scripted for you; however, you will need to
add a few tips or tools to make it your own. The script you can say to the group is in
italics.
Summary of segments:
1. Life assessment
2. Audience involvement
3. Tell yourself the truth
4. Get clear on what you want
5. Work through blocks
6. Look at your options
7. Develop a plan
8. Fun exercise: Have you seen________?
9. Additional informational or inspirational points you want to make
10. Give your information and sell your services
1. Life assessment
Develop an assessment that lists all areas of life that the audience may want to
improve. Have the audience complete their assessment prior to or first thing in the
presentation.
Ask, "How many of you checked off 2 things? Five things? Ten things?" Then say, "It
seems like a lot of you want to make changes in your life."
Optional: If it’s appropriate for a speech or short workshop and time permits, you
may want to have people share with a partner the things they want to change. Next,
have them share how not making these changes is negatively impacting their life.
Then, get the whole group together and have some members of the audience share.
You have to be honest with yourself to make the changes you need to make. One
great saying is, "If you ignore the weeds, they'll take over your lawn."
Note: Steps 1, 2, and 3 help your audience "sit with their pain" and get in touch with
the things they want to change.
4. Get clear on what you really want

It’s essential that you get clear on what you want to create and what your true vision
is for your life.
Give client examples.

What stops people from making changes are practical things and emotional things.
Practical things are things like having the time or having the money to do what you
want to do. Emotional things are things like fears, doubts, and insecurities.
I’d like you to write down what blocks or obstacles you have to move forward from in
your life, especially in those areas you gave a low score in the assessment. It could
be a fear, doubt, concern about making enough money, lack of time, and so forth.
Take a minute now to write those down.
You can have group participants share these blocks in different ways: in the big
group by calling on various individuals, or as a partner exercise followed by some
people sharing with the big group.
Next, you can discuss inner process versus action:
When someone is working with a block, it can be resolved through an inner process or
an action. An inner process is something internal or emotional. An action is something
tangible the person can do. Sometimes it can be approached in both ways.
Go back and ask participants:
Are the blocks you wrote down (or shared) inner process, action, or both?
Take shares. Clarify if needed.

Next, share your theory about blocks. Here are two examples.
Fears, doubts, and insecurities are something most people experience at one time or
another. One of the things I do with clients is to use powerful tools that help them
work through anything that’s holding them back. I’d like to bring someone up here
and give you an example of one of the tools I use. Who has a fear, doubt, or
insecurity they’d like to work through?
Here, you might demonstrate challenging a belief or fear with someone. Some
coaches demonstrate Voice Dialogue in front of the room, but you have to make sure
you have a good person to demo with before you start asking for volunteers. Choose
someone who is not too verbose, dramatic, intense, or who has a very complex issue.
If you’ve been interacting with the audience, you can invite someone you’ve already
spoken with.
One of the things I do with clients is use powerful tools to help them work through
anything that’s holding them back. For example, I had a client who….
This is just one of many tools I use with my clients.

Next, we look at options. I love to help people design or redesign their life by
exploring new possibilities.
An example of designing or redesigning your life is a woman who came to coaching
because she wanted to move to the Bahamas and wanted help with her transition.
She was a high-powered executive who wanted a more leisurely life. She wanted to
move so that she could be in nature more, do her artwork, and hang out with people
in a relaxed way without deadlines and pressures.
Through coaching, she started by scheduling time in nature, bought a convertible so
she could be more in touch with nature, took art classes, and took a job as a recruiter
where she could schedule her own time and spend as much time as she wanted with
her clients.
Her desire to move to the Bahamas completely left her, as she had met all the needs
she had. So, in coaching, we explore all the possibilities and help people design or
redesign their lives. I like to work with people creatively and help them look at options
inside the box and outside the box.
Give examples of choices people could make to redesign their life. You might use
the handout, “Choices You Can Make to Design Your Life.”

Beef this talk up and make it your own. Add your insights and provide other
information or tools that you use that could be helpful to your participants.
8. Develop a plan
Do a review of the talk so far, and the steps you’ve covered.
The next step is to develop a plan. Perhaps you've thought of steps you could take to
improve your life. I'd like you to write down 1 – 3 action steps you could take this
month to start your life makeover.
Optional, If appropriate: I'd like you to share this with a new partner. (Or you could
do this in small groups.)
Take shares from the group.
9. Fun example: Have you seen________?

This is another exercise to do with a partner. Each person talks about themself as if
they were a third party.
For example: “Have you seen [use your name]? She looks fantastic. She just lost 25
pounds and right after that met the love of her life!”
As the partner, you “egg them on” and encourage them: “Yes, I heard that she does
look amazing. How did she do it so quickly? I also heard she got a promotion. What
did you hear about that?”
10. Set Up Accountability

You’ve come up with some action steps. The question becomes, will you actually
follow through and do those things?
Give an example from your own coaching practice, such as a client who couldn’t
get herself to the gym. “After coaching with me for several weeks, she finally
established a consistent routine for going to the gym, and now she has lost 20
pounds.”

Tell participants about your services, and how you can help them to continue the
process you started in the talk or workshop.
Offer them a special rate for signing up for appointments or classes at that time (or
within a week). Make sure that you have contact information for all of those
interested in speaking to you. It may be appropriate to have them fill out an interest
survey or sign up for your mailing list (you might pass around a sign-up sheet on a
clipboard).
Hand out your materials or make them available on a table.
7 EFFECTIVE STRATEGIES FOR COMBATING DAILY STRESS
1. Give participants a handout or assessment form that you create. You might
use items similar to the stress challenges list in the Marketing chapter, such as:
___ Are you overwhelmed with too much to do?
___ Are you facing challenges with family, friends, or co-workers?
___ Are you unhappy in your job?
___ Are you struggling with marital issues?
___ Do you worry about finances?
___ Are unresolved fears or insecurities holding you back?
___ Are you struggling with illness?
___ Are you caring for elderly parents?
___ Have you lost a loved one?
___ Are you facing a life challenge, such as divorce, job change or loss, moving,
having a baby, etc.?
___ Are you neglecting your personal needs or self-care?
2. Introduction
Please take a moment, if you haven’t already, to fill out the form, checking off which
items make you stressed.
Ask the group, How many of you checked off 1 item? 5 items? 8 items? Yes, so a lot
of you have some stress and challenges in your life.
Have participants turn to a partner for sharing.
Please turn to a partner and share for two minutes each what specifically is stressful
for you in your life. It could either be on the form I gave you or something else you’d
like to share. Please share whatever feels comfortable for you to share. Switch after
2 minutes.
Let me hear from a few of you. What is stressing you out?
3. Share coping strategies

We’re going to go over 7 strategies for coping with everyday stress and challenges.
The first strategy for coping with stress is telling the truth about it. You
have to acknowledge a problem before you can fix it. There’s a great saying: If
you ignore the weeds, they’ll take over your yard.

The next strategy is to notice your reaction to stress. Does your body get
stressed and tight? Do you stop breathing? Do you start raising your voice or
speaking faster? Do you feel yourself start racing around, either mentally or
physically?
Take some shares:
What are some people’s reactions to getting stressed? Anyone?
Optional: Please turn to a partner and share your reaction to stress.
Next, do something physically to reduce the stress. As you notice your

reaction to stress, you might find you will naturally do something different to
move out of the stress. You might move your shoulders around to loosen them or
take some nice deep breaths. You might stop racing around or lower your voice,
to name a few.
Take a moment to see what you can do to feel more relaxed.
Have participants move their body or whatever they need to do.
One of the things I work on with my clients is how to move out of their typical
stress reactions and maintain a peaceful, centered place at all times. This is one
of the hardest and most important things someone can do for themself.
Fourth, identify if the stress is coming from something internally – your own
fears, doubts, or insecurities – or from things externally that need to be
addressed – a problem to be resolved, a list of to-dos, an action that must be
taken.
It’s very different to address something inside you than an issue that needs
resolution. For example: if you worry a lot about something, that’s different from
a project that has a deadline you need to meet. Or, you’re afraid that at your
holiday gathering, your family might not get along versus you haven’t planned the
gathering yet.
Let me talk more about the inner and outer so this will become more clear. Our inner
world determines how we will respond to something and the amount of stress we will
start experiencing. If, for example, someone believes they have to be perfect, then
they will start experiencing stress to meet their own expectations.
If someone is afraid all the time that something will go wrong, they will always be on
guard, and their body will tense up.
Coaching is known for helping people work on ways of thinking that no longer serve
them. There are numerous techniques I use to help people work through their blocks,
fear, and insecurities.
I had a client who was worried all the time what other people were thinking about
her. She realized that her thinking made her feel like she was walking on eggshells
around people, so in her being so self-conscious, she would not be and do her best
around people. We did a lot of coaching around that, and one thing she ended up
saying to herself over and over was to “let the chips fall where they may.” She was
going to do and be her best, and people would respond however they did. She had
grown tired of always watching her behavior and trying to be perfect around other
people.
Some things that bring us stress are internal and self-created. Some things are
tangible, practical things to be resolved. Let me give you some examples:
You have a list of things you must do that is too long.
You have a large work project to accomplish.
You have elderly parents, and you must decide what to do with their care.
The job or business you’re in has changed, and you need to accommodate that.
Welcome to life, right? Always constant changes. I think this is why coaching is so
popular. No one gave us a handbook on how to navigate life, and so, a coach helps
you explore options and come up with the best solutions to difficult problems.
Examine where your stress is coming from. Is it coming from something internal or
something that’s a practical issue that needs to be sorted out? You’ve heard the
saying about getting out of your own way. And yet that’s what most people do to
themselves – they get in their own way.
I gave you an assessment that looks at how you might be getting in your way. Let’s go
over those issues now.
(Note: You can make a handout for this.)
I procrastinate.
Fear holds me back.
I have to be perfect.
I need to please everyone.
No one should ever be unhappy with me.
I do too much.
I push myself too hard.
I have a hard time communicating my needs and feelings.
I have a hard time setting boundaries or saying “no.”
I avoid difficult situations.
I sometimes feel like a victim – that circumstances just happen to me.
I don’t make time for things that help me with stress.
Optional: Have each person turn to a partner and share what they checked off.
Is anyone in here feeling a little uncomfortable? I can completely understand. Being
aware of your behavior is the first step to change.
The fifth strategy is to work through whatever you need to work through. Let
me give you some examples.
One client just couldn’t say “no.” She had a pattern of always doing what
everyone asked her to do. As such, she was always helping her family and friends
and never had time for herself. Through coaching, she looked at her fear of saying
“no” and her feeling of guilt when she did say “no.”
We role-played her saying “no” 3 times before she had the courage to do it. She
committed to saying “no” once that week and twice the following week. Over
time, it grew easier and easier for her to say “no.”
Another client procrastinated. Things would pile up, which would cause her
extreme stress. After coaching, she realized she was afraid of doing something
wrong, so she didn’t do it all. She also realized after a long day at work, she
actually was rebelling and didn’t want anyone to take care of her, even though
she was getting way behind on her personal responsibilities.
I find that patterns and bad habits are extremely hard to break. I use a technique
called Pattern Interrupts that gets past our subconscious resistance to change.
My client started setting boundaries at work, so she left there at a reasonable
time. She delegated some tasks she didn’t enjoy doing or put off because she
wasn’t good at them.
She found some activities that were fulfilling for her, that nourished her spirit. Her
procrastination faded away, and she stopped avoiding taking care of certain
tasks. She felt happy, rather than stressed, because she set up her life to work for
her.
Sometimes people are stressed because of something practical that needs to get
taken care of. Most people have a checklist that at times can be overwhelming.
Usually when people are overwhelmed, that means they need to prioritize,
delegate tasks, set realistic expectations of themselves and others, and take some
items off their list. These can all be hard to do.
The sixth strategy is to explore your options and choices.

What can you do with the stressors you experienced? What options and choices do
you have? Maybe it’s a fear that you need to work through, and maybe it’s
something practical that needs to get done, delegated, or delayed.
I’d like you to turn to a new partner. Choose who goes first. Partner A, your only
job is to ask your partner, “How can you reduce your stress right now?” Once
you’ve heard them answer, ask again, “How else can you reduce your stress?”
Keep asking that for 2 minutes. Then, I’ll tell you to switch. Partner B now asks
partner A, “How can you reduce your stress right now?” for 2 minutes.
After 4 minutes:
Let’s get back together. Let’s hear from you. What are some of the things you can
do to reduce stress?
Take responses. Acknowledge them: Great! Good idea!
The last strategy we’ll talk about is …

Add other points to your talk that you would like to give as a tip. If you have time,
you can cover more than 7. You will present them, not necessarily as 7 points, but
whenever they flow with the talk.
In conclusion, to conquer everyday stress and challenges:
1. Be honest with yourself about your stress and how it’s affecting you. The first step
to change is to become aware of the problem.
2. Notice how you react to stress.
3. Do something physically to reduce the stress.

4. Identify if the stress is something that is created internally or if it is something
that needs to be resolved by action and coming up with something practical.
5. Explore and work through solutions.
6. Explore your options and choices.
7. Add your own tip.
I hope this information has been helpful to you. One of the things I love about
coaching is that, while things from the past may come up, the focus is on what you
can do right now.
How can you change that behavior right now? How can you accomplish what you
need to and still enjoy your life? Coaching is known for results and helping people
make changes that have been hard for people to do on their own.
If I can help coach you around your stress, I’d be happy to do so. I’m passing around
a clipboard so you can be on my mailing list.
Give your special offer, e.g., Just for tonight (this week, this month), I’d like to offer
you a special rate.
In conclusion, does anyone have any questions or comments? Can a few of you share
what you have learned today, or what you are taking away from this talk?
HOW TO NAVIGATE MORE SMOOTHLY
THROUGH YOUR LIFE TRANSITIONS
(uses similar content to the previous speech)
Summary of segments:
1. Life assessment
4. Get clear on what you want
7. Develop a plan
8. Fun exercise: Have you seen________?
1. Life assessment
Use the assessment provided on life transitions (see page D-39 or make up your
own). Have the audience complete their assessment prior to or first thing in the
presentation.
Ask, "How many of you checked off 2 things? 5 things? 10 things?" Then say," It seems
like a lot of you want to make changes in your life."
Optional: If it’s appropriate for a speech or short workshop and time permits, you
may want to have people share with a partner the things they want to change. Next,
have them share how not making these changes is negatively impacting their life.
Then, get the whole group together and have some members of the audience share.
The rest of this talk or short workshop is mostly scripted for you. The script is indicated
by the use of italics.

You have to be honest with yourself to make the changes you need to make. One
great saying is, "If you ignore the weeds, they'll take over your lawn."
Note: Steps 1, 2, and 3 help your audience "sit with their pain" and get in touch with
the things they want to change.
4. Get clear on what you really want and where you’re really headed
You need to get in touch with what you envision and what you want to create in your
life.
One way to get clear is to look at experiences in your life that made you feel
satisfied in the past. There are special times or “magical moments” when you are fully
present, and really satisfied when time stops. I call these Times of Ecstatic
Engagement.
Who would be willing to come up and share a magical moment or a Time of Ecstatic
Engagement?
Have the person share their Time of Ecstatic Engagement. Ask:
What made that experience enjoyable for you?
What else made that experience enjoyable for you?
Of all the moments in your life, what made that one stand out?
What does this experience reflect about you?
Demonstrate how “psychic” you are. Pull out Components.
Optional: If it’s appropriate for a speech or short workshop and time permits, have
participants turn to a partner.
I'd like you to share a magical moment or Time of Ecstatic Engagement. Tell your
partner what you want or need in your ideal life now that you see from this
experience. Partner, you share what you see that experience means for the person.
We’re looking for Components that might be part of someone’s ideal life. There's no
right or wrong here. This will help clarify what you want or need in your life now.
Follow the partner exercise with audience participation. Have people share what
they discovered.
It’s essential that you get clear on what you want to create and what your true vision
is for your life.
What stops people from making changes are practical things and emotional things.
Practical things are things like having the time or having the money to do what you
want to do. Emotional things are things like fears, doubts, and insecurities.
Optional: Have participants write them down and then share with a partner
As you think about things that stop people from moving forward, what comes to
mind?
For example, do you doubt that you can change something because you tried before
and didn't change it, and you fear you'll fail again? What else comes to mind?
Optional: You can do this in different ways – group sharing; a writing exercise; or
after group participation, have people share their blocks, fears, and insecurities in
partners or small groups.
Next, you can discuss inner process versus action:
When someone is working with a block, it can be resolved through an inner process or
an action. An inner process is something internal or emotional. An action is something
tangible the person can do. Sometimes it can be approached in both ways.
Go back and ask participants:
Are the blocks you wrote down (or shared) inner process, action or both?
Take shares. Clarify if needed.
Next, share your theory about blocks. Here are two examples.
Fears, doubts, and insecurities are something most people experience at one time or
another. One of the things I do with clients is use powerful tools that help them work
through any things that hold them back. I’d like to bring someone up here and give
you an example of one of the tools. Who has a fear, doubt, or insecurity they’d like to
work through?
Here, you might demonstrate challenging a belief or fear with someone. Some
coaches demonstrate Voice Dialogue in front of the room, but you have to make
sure you have a good person to demo with before you start asking for volunteers.
Choose someone who is not too verbose, dramatic, intense or who has a very
complex issue. If you’ve been interacting with the audience, you can invite someone
you’ve already spoken with.

Next, we look at options. I love to help people design or redesign their life by
exploring new possibilities.
We talked earlier about Components – aspects of what you want. We keep
uncovering all the Components until that’s complete. Then, we look at different life
options that incorporate your Components.
Give examples. Use your own stories or the one that follows.
An example of designing or redesigning your life is a woman who came to coaching
because she wanted to move to the Bahamas and wanted help with her transition.
She was a high-powered executive who wanted a more leisurely life. She wanted to
move so that she could be in nature more, do her artwork, and hang out with people
in a relaxed way without deadlines and pressures.
Through coaching, she started by scheduling time in nature, bought a convertible so
she could be more in touch with nature, took art classes, and took a job as a recruiter
where she could schedule her own time and spend as much time as she wanted with
her clients.
Her desire to move to the Bahamas completely left her, as she had met all the needs
she had. So, in coaching, we explore all the possibilities and help people design or
redesign their lives. I like to work with people creatively and help them look at options
inside the box and outside the box.

Beef this talk up and make it your own. Add your insights and provide other
information or tools that you use that could be helpful to your participants.
8. Develop a plan
Do a review of the talk so far, and the steps you’ve covered.
The next step is to develop a plan. Perhaps you've thought of steps you could
take to improve your life. I'd like you to write down 1 – 3 action steps you could take
this month.
Optional, If appropriate: I'd like you to share this with a new partner. (Or you could
do this in small groups.)
Take shares from the group.
9. Fun example: Have you seen________?

This is another exercise to do with a partner. Each person talks about themself as if
they were a third party.
For example: “Have you seen [use your name]? She looks fantastic. She just lost 25
pounds and right after that met the love of her life!”
As the partner, you “egg them on” and encourage them: “Yes, I heard that she does
look amazing. How did she do it so quickly?
10. Set Up Accountability

You’ve come up with some action steps. The question becomes, will you actually
follow through and do those things.
One of the things coaching is known for is accountability. If you say you’re going to
do something, the coach will hold you accountable and check back in to make sure
you’ve done those things.
Give example from your own coaching practice, such as a client who couldn’t get
herself to the gym. “After coaching with me for several weeks, she finally established
a consistent routine for going to the gym, and now she has lost 20 pounds.”

Tell participants about your services, and how you can help them to continue the
process you started in the talk or workshop.
Offer them a special rate for signing up for appointments or classes at that time (or
within a week). Make sure that you have contact information for all of those
interested in speaking to you. It may be appropriate to have them fill out an interest
survey or sign up for your mailing list (you might pass around a sign-up sheet on a
clipboard).
Hand out your materials or make them available on a table.

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THE LIFE PURPOSE INSTITUTE

SPIRITUAL COACHING METHOD™

SPEECHES, GROUPS AND WORKSHOPS

This chapter will include:

2. How to find places to speak and teach a group or workshop

3. Setting up speeches, workshops, and classes

4. Preparing for your speech, workshop, or group

5. Sample speeches, groups, and workshops

content into a workshop or ongoing group.

To do that you will need these things:

a) 7 Secrets to a Successful Relationship

b) Living Life with More Passion, Purpose, and Meaning

c) 5 Ways to Achieve Optimal Health and Vitality

d) 7 Ways to Reduce Your Stress and Create More Peace

e) Become a Great Parent – 10 Powerful Strategies

f) Life Makeover: How to Reinvent Your Life in 30 Days or Less

might not be aware of.

based on your qualifications and/or reputable information.

them “sit with their pain.”

have people share some with the larger group.

if it’s appropriate for that group.

around this topic.

had a client who ________.”

see themselves working with you.

than speaking positively just about yourself.

been difficult to make,” etc:

Partner and group exercises if that’s appropriate. Participants usually enjoy

engaging with each other and sharing their own experience.

Your story, if it’s inspiring to others

the Life Purpose Institute

A special discounted rate that is time-limited or a free complimentary session

that you offer

and then develop your talk from there.

and then make adjustments to the talk based on the input.

and attract the ideal clients you want.

may need to come up with a new speech each time.

Creating a Longer Workshop or Group

are the solutions?

There are 3 different kinds of groups and workshops:

1. A structured group that has a clear sequence and process

Several (or all) group members get supported each session.

improve their health

3. An open-ended group, or sequence of presentations, with variable content

ongoing commitment, unless participants subscribe to a series.

Examples: A women’s empowerment series, or a personal or spiritual growth group

2. How to Find Places to Speak and Teach a Group or

There are numerous places to speak or give workshops, such as:

1. Professional and social organizations and associations

2. Spiritual and religious organizations – women’s groups, men’s groups, couples’

groups, singles’ groups, youth groups

3. Career and professional groups

5. Community colleges and adult education

6. Libraries – they can promote your workshop to their mailing list

9. Bookstores – promote your own book or work with management to develop a

reading list relevant to your topic

associations to get their schedules and guidelines for up to 2 years ahead

11. Health clubs and spas

12. Yoga studios

14. Organizations that provide programs for special needs or focuses –

entrepreneurs, working moms, former military, creatives, people with disabilities or

15. Meeting rooms at health food stores

16. Schedule and promote your own speeches and workshops

Contacting Organizations Where You Might Speak or Teach

If you are interested in speaking and teaching workshops at churches, organizations,