Team of
Influencing Key Opinion Leaders
Programme Objectives
• Have fun
• Learn About Emotional
Intelligence
• Intrapersonal
Communication
• Interpersonal
Communication and Influence
• NLP and its Connection to
Emotional Intelligence and
Communications
• How to apply our knowledge
to influence KOL
REWARDING
Pambos Demosthenous
Elena Peter
Thrasos Aleen Avraam
Christina Barry Aspasia Louisa
Pambos Mustafa Marina Ahmad Anastasia
Our Vision is
To continualy be recognised
as the Best Training and
Learning Consultancy
in the Middle East
Numbers Game
Role Play Game
• Friday Night and you Invite your friends
over
• Do you have a great time?
• Does this mood transfer over to the next
day?
Influence
“We control fifty percent of a relationship.
We influence one hundred percent of it”
Barbara Colorose.
Influence
The definition of influence is to convince
someone to make a decision, or exhibit a
behaviour that you feel is right.
Six weapons of Influence
• Commitment and Consistency
• Reciprocation
• Scarcity
• Authority
• Liking
• Social Proof
1st Weapon
Commitment and Consistency
Commitment and Consistency
The commitment and consistency rule
states that once we make a decision, we
will experience pressure from others and
ourselves to behave consistently with that
decision.
Commitment and Consistency
• Unhappy couples who don’t break up
• Cognitive dissonance – When was the last
time you bought something really
expensive?
• Donation Principle
• Telemarketers
• How are you feeling?
Commitment and Consistency
• Zero Base Thinking – Unhappy Couple
• Small steps in Aligning with your Ultimate
Request
• How does it apply to your job? – Role Play
2nd Weapon – Reciprocation
Reciprocation
“Trying to get without first giving is as
fruitless as trying to reap without having
sown.” – Napoleon Hill
Reciprocation – The rule
The rule of reciprocation states that
humans have an inherent desire to return
favors
Reciprocation
• Free samples from Organisations
• Donations to Charities
• If perceived as a trick – Backfires
• Can you get a formal friendship based on
the rule of reciprocation?
Reciprocation
• Verbal Favor and Reciprocation
• Verbal Favour is just as powerful as
physical gifts.
• Do the favour first
• My boss Peter – Books to potential Clients
Reciprocation
• Contrasting Principle
• Salespeople – “favors”
• Realtors – Unethical
• Contrasting must be reasonable – or it will
backfire
• Use reciprocation and contrasting in your
conversations
• Any stories or examples from the
workplace? How can you use this?
3rd Weapon - Scarcity
Scarcity
“Without a sense of urgency, desire
loses its value” Jim Rohn
Scarcity
The principle of scarcity states that we are
more easily persuaded when the resource
is limited
Scarcity
• Consumers become hungry
• Sales
– Limited Time Only
– Sale ends Tomorrow
– Only 10 left
– Rare Opportunity
Scarcity
• Used in Personal Relationships
• People are more motivated by loss than by
gain
• Scarcity implies
– Rarity
– High Quality
– High Demand
Scarcity
• Job Interviews
• Males surrounded by women
• Females surrounded by men
• Competition
Scarcity
“The pleasure of people in having
something scarce does not come from
using the resource. It comes from having
the resource. It provides a sense of pride
and security”
Scarcity
• Romeo and Juliet Effect
• Availability of Information
– Governments
– Parents
– Managers
– Partners
Scarcity
• Parents – Abundant Resource
• Family – Abundant Resource
• Friends - Depends
• Time with Loved Ones - Depends
• How does scarcity apply to your jobs? Do
you use this Principle? How can you use
it better?
4th Weapon - Authority
Authority
"All things are subject to
interpretation.
Whichever interpretation
prevails at a given time
is a function of power
and not truth." -
Friedrich Nietzsche
Authority
“The principle of authority states that we
are more easily persuaded by those with
authority”
• Police Role Play
Authority
• Attorney – Advise
• Federer – Tennis Lessons
• Beckham – Soccer Lessons
Authority - Symbols
• Title
• Clothing
• Perceivable Wealth
• How do you feel about the above? What
can you do to help yourselves at work?
5th Weapon - Liking
Liking
"Each man is led by his own liking." - Virgil
Liking
The principle of liking says that people will
say “yes” more often to those they like.
• Story of meeting somebody on the train
Liking
• Association
• Similarity
• “Dirty Tactic”- Linking yourself
• Subconscious similarity
• Social Contract
Association and Similarity
Liking
• Compliments – When used effectively
• Association
• Link yourself to good news
• Become the middle man of good news
Liking
• Cooperation – Working with others
• Similarity – Manipulate the technique –
Increase Similarity, Increase Influence
• Physical Attractiveness – Good Behaviour,
Good Manners, Professional dress code
• How can you apply this weapon to your
work?
6th Weapon – Social Proof
Social Proof
"Men are like sheep,
of which a flock is
more easily driven
than a single one."
Richard Whately
Social Proof
The principle of social proof states that
people look to others and follow what they
are doing
Story of
Catherine Genovese
Social Proof
• Studies with victims of seizures
• Los Angeles 2007 – Still happens today
• Good leaders can convince easier the
masses than the individuals
– They start with the few
– Others observe and follow
Social Proof
• Training Companies Trick
• Clubs and Bars
• Overcoming Fears
• Setting Goals
• How about your jobs? Is social proof at
work with your jobs? How can you use it?
NLP
Neuro Linguistic Programming
• Neurology
• Linguistics
• Programming
NLP
• Pacing and Leading
• Anchoring
• Reframing
NLP – 4 Pillars
1. Know Your Outcome
2. Use Your Sensory Acuity
3. Have Behavioural Flexibility
4. Build And Maintain Rapport
NLP and Rapport
Rapport is the ability to relate to others in
a way that creates a climate of trust and
understanding.
NLP and Rapport
Theory of Communication
How to build Rapport
• Matching
• Mirroring
• Cross Over - Matching Mirroring
Pacing and Leading
• Establish Rapport by
Matching/Mirroring/Crossover matching
• Slowly start to change what your are doing
• Lead into different body postures
• Lead conversation
• Starbucks Example
Uses of Pacing and Leading
• Upset
• Angry
• Change of Opinion
• Influence
• Ultimately enlarge their reality
Anchoring
“An anchor is a stimulus that creates a
response in either you or in another
person”
Anchoring
• Pavlov experiment with Dogs - Association
• Pambos High School Reunion
• Taste of Food at my parents house
• Smell of the Soap in Sheraton Dubai
Creek
• Any personal examples?
Anchoring
• Visual
• Auditory
• Kinesthetic
• Gustatory
• Olfactory
Anchoring
• Identify personal Anchors – relate to
Intrapersonal Communication
• Can you identify Anchors that act
negatively on you?
• Anchors outside your conscious
awareness – What is the external trigger?
• Utilize these anchors to your benefit
• How can you apply them at work?
Listening Exercise
•What
•How
•When
•Why
•Where
©§
©
Srokes
• When do Strokes just flow freely in ones
lifetime?
• Role play - phone
STROKES
Strokes are any kind of
attention you can get from
or give to
another person.
Strokes build
STROKES
•Positive – Specific, coming from the heart
•Negative – Mean, untasteful
•Zero – Total Ignorance
Which one is the worst?
•Doctor Call
•Two girls at a café
•Ratio of positives to negatives
•Sandwich Negative Strokes
Zero Stroke Jobs
STROKES – 2 Kinds
Ritual
Spontaneous
- -- -- -
++ - -- -- -
---
The best stroke
you can give:
PPF -UK-
UK-7.8A
P L E
P E O
L P E IR
HE H T H C
E A C a tc h
R UL L th e m
F IA L . d o in
E N T so m
g
PO T ethin
rig g
ht.
LOVE ME….
…. ATE ME….
….BUT PLEASE DON’T IGNORE ME!
If you touch me gently and tenderly
if you look at me
and smile at me
if you pay attention and then listen
to what I have to say
before you talk
then I will grow
I will really grow
CIRCLE OF POSITIVE FEEDBACK
My email is:
pambos@peopleachieve.com
Personal Actions
• Look at these wonderful ideas, and I would
like each and every one of you to write
down 3 ideas that you will implement for
yourselves. You are forcing them to take
the theory and implement it.
• Who would like to share with us the 3
things that you would like to do.
17 Camels Story
• 3 sons
• 1st son to get one half
• 2nd son to get one third
• 3rd son to get one ninth
