• Make an orderly life

• Makes service life more pleasant

• Gives self assurance
• Makes an offr a gentleman
• Brings credit to the services as a whole
Officer - is “one who holds an
office; a person who performs
some public duty; a person
entrusted with responsibility in the
army, navy or air force’
Gentleman - A man who is
polite and shows consideration
for the feelings of other people; a
man who always acts in an
honourable way
“However good and well trained a
man may be as an individual, he is
not a good soldier till he has
become absorbed into the
corporate life of his unit and has
been entirely imbued with its
tradition”
- FM Wavell
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
• In service, saluting is in vogue on the
following occasions :-
– By an officer in acknowledgement
– By a junior officer before and after addressing a
senior officer in a matter of duty
– By an officer entering and leaving an office of an
officer, equal in rank or senior to him
– By an officer while passing uncased Colours or
National Flag
– By an officer when National Anthem is being
played
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
On Parade
– Officers are expected to pay
normal compliments to their
seniors in rank, either with or
without arms (the person being
saluted must be looked directly in
the eyes).
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
On Parade
– President and other visiting dignitaries
of high rank are given a gun salute
depending upon their status.
– An officer always salutes his seniors
in rank before and after addressing
them, while on duty or on parade.
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
On Parade

– Officers of the rank of Major or

equivalent in other services are
entitled to the full salute of
“present arms”.
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Off Parade
– When in uniform, officers are
expected to salute their seniors in
rank.
– On occasions when plain clothes are
worn, compliments are paid either by
raising the hat or bowing slightly and
saying the appropriate words of
greeting, or shaking hands if the
person greeted offers her or his hand
or by stretching one’s arms.
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Gen Custom

– When walking towards an officer,

an officer salutes when he is not
more than 30 paces and not less
than 6 paces away.
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Gen Custom
– If an officer passes by or joins
two officers of different ranks,
one of whom is senior and the
other junior to him, the new-
comer must pay the normal
compliments to his senior.
However, the junior of the group
does not salute the new comer,
whatever his rank.
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Gen Custom
– When two officers of different
rank walk together, the senior
walks on the right and the junior
to the left of him.
– When three officers of different
rank walk together,the senior-
most walks in the centre, the next
senior to his right and the junior-
most on his left.
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Returning the Salute
– When saluted one should always
return it in proper manner.
– If two or more officers are walking
together, only the senior-most
officer returns the salute. If the
senior officer in a gp, fails to return
a salute and if there is inadequate
time to draw his attention to the
compliment being paid, the junior
officer must return the salute.
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Returning the Salute
– If two or three officers from
different services are of equal
rank, the officer of the senior
service must acknowledge the
salute (The order of senior of the
Services is Army, Navy and Air
Force).
 PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Office
– When any officer enters the office of
another officer of equal or senior rank,
he must salute. He must keep his hat
on unless invited to sit down.
– When a senior officer enters the officer
of a junior officer, the officer in the chair
must rise and greet his visitor
appropriately. The senior officer then
salutes and returns the greetings.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Office
– On leaving, the junior officer rises
to his feet and the senior officer
returns the compliment by saluting.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Colours, Funerals and National
Anthem
– When in uniform, officers on
parade must salute uncased
Colours, funerals and when the
National Anthem is played.
– All other ranks should stand in
attention.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Colours, Funerals and National
Anthem
– When in plain clothes, an officer
stands to attention.
– If officer is wearing a hat, he
removes it with the right hand and
place it across his left breast
pocket.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Mess
– If there is a senior officer in the
mess, he should greet him
appropriately.
– When an officer of field rank or
above enters the room, one must
stand up and greet him.
(If one is at the dining table, then
he need not rise)
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Ladies
– When in uniform, the correct way to
wish a lady is to salute.
– When in civil dress, one may greet
appropriately.
(One should not try to shake
hands unless the lady offers it)
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Retreat
– When Retreat is sounded all
officers and OR in the vicinity
should stand to attention. They
should not salute.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Last Post
– Officers remain at the salute during
the sounding of the last post. (the
last bugle call for the departed
servicemen).
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
War Memorials

– When passing a War Memorial,

it is customary to salute.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Occasions when saluting is not done

– When riding a horse, bi-cycle or

while driving a car.
– A soldier crossing a road through
traffic.
– A soldier without headdress.
– A soldier carrying a heavy parcel.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Occasions when saluting is not done
– An OR must not salute but only
stand to attention when the
National Anthem is played.
– One should never salute with a
cigarette, cigar or pipe in his
mouth.
– When in civil dress.
PAYING OF COMPLIMENTS
Occasions when saluting is not done
– Saluting in public conveyances is
not necessary.
– Salutes are not exchanged in
public places, like rly stns, Airports
etc except while making report.
– Officers are not required to salute
at the National Anthem being
played in a Radio or TV.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
General
– Mess customs instill in officers,
particularly the younger officers a
strong sense of espirit de corps.. .
– The mess moulds the character
and the way of life of an officer to a
great extent.
– A pride in one’s own mess is an
important factor in raising morale
and sets the social life in a cantt
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Dress
– An officer should be well turned out
in the mess on all occasions.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
Officers must :-
– observe the principal customs of their
own mess and of the mess to which
they may be invited.
– Avoid talking “Shop” as far as possible.
– not discuss controversial subjects such
as religion and politics.
– not indulge in loose gossip about
women.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
– not use swear words in the mess.
– Always address field officers I.e.,
Maj and above as Sir and the
others by name.
– should bring, any complaint against
the mess staff, to the notice of the
mess committee instead of ticking
off them directly.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
– Should not monopolize a place of
comfort .
– Should avoid playing TV, Radio or
music system loudly.
(It is both correct and normal for an
officer wishing to play either the radio or
gramophone to seek permission to do so
from the other members present.)
– Be punctual always.
– Not click their heels or stand to attention
when they greet or pay compliments to
a senior in the mess
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
– Should not enter the mess with a cap or
a hat on.
– Not form cliques amongst brother
officers and friends.
(This destroys the image of a united happy
family of which the Services are proud of. It
hits at the very basis of espirit de corps).
– The mess property is to be cared for as
one’s own.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
– An officer should record his genuine
constructive suggestions in the
‘Suggestion book’.
(The suggestion books is not intended
to be a complaint book and a forum for
sarcastic comments).
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
– If one is reading a newspaper or a
magazine when a senior officer of the same
unit comes in, the officer should get up and
offer his paper/magazine to him if that
happens to be the single copy in the mess.
Likewise the officer should offer his seat to
him under the fan or in front of the fire, if no
other comfortable seat be available.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
– An officer should never read a book in
the dining room.
– An officer should not open letter at the
mess table.
In extenuating circumstances, permission
should be taken from the President or the
senior officer present.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Conduct
– Senior officers must never reprimand
junior officers in the mess.
(When it is necessary, it should be done
later in the office.)
– Forcing of drinks on guests is bad
manner.
– Officers living in a mess are not
allowed to drink in their rooms.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Visitors and Guests
– The guests that are invited to the mess must
be carefully selected.
(The permission of the PMC must be obtained
before one invites a guest to a Regimental
function).
– No guest should be left unattended.
– If a guest is not properly dressed, he should
not be taken to the ante room but
entertained in some other room, verandah or
garden.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Visitors and Guests
– Pets should not be brought in to the
mess.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Drinking
– There is no custom that officers must
take alcoholic drinks.
(if one drinks he should do so in
moderation).
– An officer need not stand drinks to his
brother officers in the Mess
(This does not apply to offering a
drink to the guests)
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Band
– When band is in attendance on various
mess functions, it is customary for
officers to watch them for a while and
show appreciation by clapping at the
end.
– As a token of gratitude, the senior
members should present the band
some drinks at the end of the function.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Ladies Room
– Ladies are not permitted in side the
mess except on certain occasions.
(Every mess usually has a ladies room
and one can entertain ladies there.)
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Dinner Nights
This ia a parade and officers who have
not had permission to dine out must be
present and punctual. The normal
procedure for dinner nights is :-

• The senior dining member is normally the

President and a Vice should have been
detailed by the PMC.
• Mess Havildar should report to the
President when dinner is ready.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Dinner Nights
• The president, after allowing people to
finish their drinks, leads the way into the
dinning room.
(During dinner nights it is not necessary
that order of seniority is observed while
entering the dining hall).
• Officers take their seats after the
President is seated and may start eating
only after everyone has been served.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Dinner Nights
• An officer arriving late will report to the
President for permission to take his
place at the table. Place for late-comers
is left vacant only till the end of the first
course. Similarly, if an officer wishes to
leave the table before dinner is over, he
should walk upto the president and
obtain the latter’s permission.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Dinner Nights
• Senior dining member is served first and
then service is continued in a clockwise
direction.
• During the Dinner Night dinner, only the
President can give orders to the waiters or
mess Havildar.
• It is not correct to smoke a pipe in the
dining room nor should officers start
smoking unless permission to smoke is
given.
 MESS ETIQUETTE
Dinner Nights
• Officers may leave the table after the
senior member rises.
• The Vice-President will leave after all
others have left the table.
• Officer should not touch any silver
displayed on the table except cutlery
• An officer can leave the mess as soon
as the dinner is over.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Car Entry
• In cars, the senior sits on the left of the
rear seat. He is the first to enter and the
first to leave. If asked to join your senior
who is already seated, enter through the
right door.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Jeep/Jonga
• In light utility vehs, ladies and children sit
in the body of the ves, with the officer in
the co-driver’s seat.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Smoking
• As regards removing your headgear and
smoking when being driven in a service
transport, they are both NO.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Walking in step
• Men in uniform should always walk in
step, the junior on the left.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Lead the way
• When showing a senior, or a visitor
around, lead the way.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Punctuality
• Use your watch to reach five minutes
before you are due, instead of being late.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Chewing
• Do not chew supari, gum, paan or
tobacco while in office, in uniform in
public places or in a senior’s presence.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Lounging in uniform
• Either walk, stand, or sit. Don’t lounge
around when in uniform.
• Wearing of the cap when outdoors is
mandatory and not optional.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Carriage
• We are an elite force and should carry
ourselves with pride. Leave the wearing
of earrings and long hair to the riff-raff.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Sunglasses
• Wear them only while travelling; take
them off when talking to a senior or a
lady.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Pens/Pencils
• These should not be exposed but kept
clipped to an inside pocket.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Wearing of caps
• Wear your cap/beret cap with pride and
not like designer apparel.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Canes & Swagger sticks
• These should be carried in uniform, only
by those who are entitled to carry them.
A cane should never be used as a
pointer, or carried tucked under a belt. It
should be in your right hand, or under
your left arm, when marching.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Loosened Neckwear
• Do not unbutton the collar or loosen your
tie while on duty – no matter how strong
the urge.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Cuffs
• It is bad enough to roll up your sleeves,
an open cuff is unpardonable.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Leaning on desk
• Do not lean on your senior’s desk.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Smoking
• Do not enter any office (your senior’s in
particular) either smoking or carrying in
your fingers your pipe, cigar or cigarette.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
When conducting dignitaries
• When leading our senior or a lady to a
room/office, be the first to enter holding
the door open, if the door opens inwards.
If it opens outwards, hold it open and
allow them to enter first.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Hands in pocket
• Please keep your hands out of your
pockets, specially when talking to a
senior or a lady. It is also preferable to
keep your hands dry and
clean/manicured nails before offering
them for a shake.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Differing with seniors
• This phrase was very carefully coined. The
message is that it is as important to differ
and disagree as it is to do so with elegance
and courtesy. An aggressive broadside will
no doubt win you instant hero status with
juniors and back – benchers, but that is all.
The senior will not accept this kind of
attitude. So you better decide and take
your chances before adopting them option.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
In a senior’s office
• If someone else enters, no matter how
senior or closely connected to you,
don’t jump up unless the occupant of
the office himself gets up.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
In a junior’s office
• When entering a junior’s office, one should
salute only after he has got up from his
chair, and wished you. If he is engrossed
in his work, and has not seen you enter,just
walk up to a chair, and sit down. If he still
doesn’t notice, call out his name. Do not
salute the Chair in the Adjutant’s, if he
happens to be junior to you.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Visit by your Boss
• You should be complimented when your
Boss takes time out to visit your office.
Assume that he has come for a specific
purpose and that his time is limited. Ask if
you can help him. Do not immediately pour
your problems to him. If his time permits,
when he has finished with his business, he
may ask if you have anything to bring up.
This also applies to telephone calls from
your Boss.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Telephone calls
• Brevity is the secret of good
communication. With a visitor in the
office, do him the courtesy of giving
him precedence over the telephone or
even a file.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Courtesy
• There is no know substitute for
consideration and courtesy. The Biblical
quotation is as valid today as it was when
first written :-
– Do Unto Others As You Would Have Them Do
Unto You’
&

– Manners Maketh the Man

 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Behaviour with Seniors
• The extent of informality and relaxation
should be governed by your senior and not
you.
• Do not extend off-duty informality into the
next official day, if you desire to continue
enjoying an informal relationship when you
are off-duty.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS

Meeting a Senior Officer

• If you are headed for a senior, who is
in the middle of a crowd, to greet him,
do not pause en route to greet/hand-
shake some others whom you happen
to know in the crowd.
 ETIQUETTE
DISCIPLINE AND INTERPERSONAL
RELATIONS
Ladies First
• Ladies First is a dictum which is to be
followed with discretion. It applies to the
order in which people move in for dinner, or
enter a club, a restaurant, a car, or a boat.
Wherever4 there is an element of risk or
danger, or a large crowd, e.g., in a cinema,
the gentleman must precede the lady.
 ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATING

Telephone Calls
• Never, ever say only ‘Hello’.
• Either give your telephone number and
name, or the office you are in, when called.
• If your senior calls and asks for
someone/some info, who/which is not
readily available, do not leave the phone to
go get him/it without first asking if you can
do that.
• Best would be to take his number and call
back.
 ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATING

Telephone Calls
• At the end of a conversation with a senior
or a lady, wait to hear the ‘click’ at the other
end before putting your phone down.
• Speaking on the phone is like using R/T :
you have to be slow and deliberate in your
speech because the other chap can not see
your facial expressions and gestures which
often help to make up for garbled gibberish
and grim grammar.
 ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATING

Telephone Calls
• Unless it is your call, allow the other man to
say his piece first and then, only then, start
on yours.
• While on the phone, if you need to take
another call or talk to someone in your
room, for heaven’s sake, first excuse
yourself and then cover the mouthpiece
with your hand.
 ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATING

Telephone Calls
• The bell rings, you answer the call and find
it is for someone who happens to be
around. It is vital to tell that ‘someone’ who
exactly is on the line in addition to
who/where the call is from.
• All calls recd in your absence must be
returned at the earliest. This is not mere
courtesy; it can be an operational
imperative, a personal crisis or a domestic
emergency.
 ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATING

Running Commentary
• After you have given your senior
something to read, sit back and, for
heaven’s sake, shut up. No matter
how brilliant, he can not read your
paper intelligently, if you continue to
jabber. This also applies when he is
on the phone and listening to some
one you cant’s see.
 ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATING

Speaking Distraction
• When speaking formally or informally, do
not jungle change or keys in your pocket,
twirl a key chain or eyeglasses, maneuver
pipes, finger-tap the table, pull up your
pants etc. Gesturing with your hands is the
worst known aid to verbal expression.
 ETIQUETTE
COMMUNICATING

Language
• Outside the bar and locker room, slang and
swear words are verboten, no matter how
profane your senior or how friendly the lady
it. It is mandatory to use respectable
substitutes like a deliberate ‘Yes’ than ‘Hah’
or ‘Yup’
 ETIQUETTE
ON THE MOVE

Blowing Auto Horns

• Blowing auto horns outside an apartment
block is a good idea if you want almost
everyone to open doors, peep out and
curse you. If you intend to call out only a
particular occupant, this is the height of bad
manners and very thoughtless. Try the
door chime, instead.
 ETIQUETTE
ON THE MOVE
Cars and Class
• Agatha Christie’s Miss Marple once said
that those who honk unnecessarily, change
lanes at will, don’t stop to allow pedestrians
to cross, drive on full-beam in town,hog the
parking, drive through puddles at speed
when there are pedestrians and two
wheelers nearby and don’t concede right of
way, are typical examples of people who
acquired cars before they acquired the
class! What is your own sequence? There
is still time to get it right.
 ETIQUETTE
ON THE MOVE

Overtaking other Service Veh

• There is a tendency amongst us to
overtake any service veh which
comes in our way. This phenomenon
should be avoided if the veh you are
overtaking is of a senior pers. It is
totally prohibited to overtake any
FLAG veh.
 ETIQUETTE
ON THE MOVE

Negotiating Turns
• Whenever negotiating a right turn,
always imagine a tfc roundel ahead of
you, and follow an imaginary path
around it. You will never go wrong,
and will most certainly avoid an
accident.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE
Guessing Games
• The best answer to ‘I bet you don’t
remember me’, is to say ‘No, I don’t’ and
turn your back. When meeting someone
you have not seen for a while, always give
your name and rank and say where you two
had met last. Guessing games accomplish
nothing except deflate the ego of a
thoughtless big-shot or embarrass and lose
a friend.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Introduction and Calls

• You are not obliged to introduce
yourself,your wife or your lady-friend,
every time you run into someone not
known. But, should you want or need
to,you must know the basics to avoid
gaffes.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Some Common Blunders

• ‘My Mrs/My Family’. Quaint – origin not
known – reference to own wife is
wrong. Better substitutes like ‘my
wife’, ‘Mrs Kapur’ or the best like ‘my
wife, Rashmi’ are available but not
used for reasons shrouded in mystery.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Hasty Pleasantry
• Few of us wait patiently for an introduction
to be completed before jutting our hand out
and announcing how pleased we are to
meet etc etc. If both do it at the same time
(as it mostly happens), the names get
drowned in the noise and neither is wiser as
to either’s name! So, wait and hold your
effusion.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Lady wife
• Yet another confounding masterpiece.
Thank God one hasn’t yet heard of a
‘Gentleman Husband’ from a woman!
As in the case of all officers who are
assumed to be ‘Gentlemen’, all wives
also enjoy the tacit understanding (if
not the assumption) of being ‘Ladies’.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

What’s in a Name
• Most of us have only one name (not
including the nickname) and we strongly and
rightly believe it is good name. Asking ‘what
is your good name, please? May suggest
that the chap also has a bad name. The
truth is, this is the result of a literal
translation of the Hindi equivalent and a
sincere (though mistaken) attempt at being
extra polite. Avoid it, if you can.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

First Names
• No matter how young or junior an officer, his
wife must be addressed as ‘Mrs ……’ until
and unless she herself or the husband tells
you that she may be addressed by her first
name. It is a privilege she has granted to
you and you must thank her for it, boldly and
expressly.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Handshake
• Upon meeting, it is purely the prerogative of
the senior or the lady to offer the hand first!!
NEVER otherwise, barring some rare cases
involving greeting and congratulations!
Grasp (but not grab) the full hand (and not
merely the fingers) firmly but without
demonstrating your brute strength.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

How Do You Do
• This is NOT an enquiry after your health, so
`fine’, ‘very well’. A plain, return ‘how do you
do’ is what is necessary, ‘how are you’ is an
enquiry and may be answered by ‘very well,
thank you’.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Informality and Decorum

• If being friendly by not familiar with juniors is
an art, being easy, informal and jocular
WITHOUT being cheeky or frivolous with
seniors and ladies, falls in the realm of fine
art. When in the slightest doubt about being
formal. It is better to be called OG than risk
getting labelled as you know what!
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Hello, Boss
• At any mess function, the Chief Guest(s)
and the Commanding Officer/Commander/
GOC must be gone up to and greeted as
early in the evening as possible. This needs
to be done effortlessly, without making
obvious bee-lines, tripping over or in an
abrupt and jarring manner like a drill
movement. This is a fine art as there are as
many ways and timings of doing it as are
people. Those who avoid it, whatever their
reason, are more conspicuous and
noticeable that they care to imagine. Such a
neglect does not show your personal likes or
reprobation, it shows your unawareness,
lack of confidence, indiscipline and
disrespect.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Farewell Speeches
• Not the occasion to settle scores or for a
verbose after action report. If you cannot be
witty, be brief (‘Brevity is the ………’).
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Dinner Carnage
• At a party in the Mess, no matter how much
you are going to be charged, no matter how
seldom chicken appears on your table at
home and however late the hour, don,t
make your onslaught on food look as if it is
the ‘Last Supper’. Save your concentration,
ferocity and mayhem for combat, squash-
court, duels or wood-chopping. Don’t also
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Make your platter resemble a pyramid of

food. It is neater and more civilised to go for
smaller and frequent helpings, not cluttering
your plate with little bit of EVERY dish on
the table at the same time.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Slurp, Splash and Chomp

• One of the things that sets the homo-sapiens
apart from the Neanderthal, is the way we
eat. No one wants to SEE what is being
chewed. So keep your mouth closed while
eating.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Elbow Bending
• There are certain definite no-nos when hitting
the bar. Do not ever get drunk and make a
spectacle of yourself; don’t offer drinks, except
to guests and for God’s sake don’t drink till the
sun goes down. There is no more unedifying
sight than a drunken sod being pulled out of a
drain. Avoid drinking when alone and there is
really no necessity to prove how hard a drinker
you are. Your reputation or lack of it will always
precede you.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Drink Threshold
• When you cross it, it is actually your
Commanding Officer/wife who is put to
greater shame and damnation, instantly
becoming an object of public pity, ridicule or
both. Please spare the old man/the lady!
There are perhaps other ways of making a
perfect ass only of yourself! Find out and try
them instead.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

“Take Leave”
• One always begs to take ‘my/our leave’ and
NOT ‘your leave’, when wanting to depart.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Wit and Humour

• The refined and suave variety is essential
and very desirable in all situations. There is,
however, one pitfall : you need to be very
sure that you are witty . Your humour
should be sans malice, derision and vitriol.
Remember, sarcasm is the lowest form of
wit and the surest way of losing friends and
not influencing people.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Greetings
• The promptness, pleasantness and
deliberateness of greeting any lady and a
senior anywhere, whether they know you or
not, any time, are the hallmark of good
grooming and breeding. In uniform, it has to
be a salute; at other times a verbal greeting
appropriate to the time of the day. Avoiding
it, defaulting on it or making it look like an
imposition, does incalculable harm to your
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

own standing, it does not affect the lady or

the senior at all !!
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Time of the Day

• ‘Good Morning’ is used when meeting
someone for the first time during the day, in
the forenoon. The response can be `Good
Morning’ or even a shorytened version, I.e.
just `Morning’. One never say ‘Good
Morning’ while talking leave. In the
afternoon, ie from midday onwards “Good
Afternoon” is used as a greeting. This is
replaced by
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

“Good Evening” at sunset, and continues

right up to midnight, when it is in turn
replaced by ‘Morning’ ‘Morning’, Afternoon’
and ‘Evening’ are used only as a greeting
and not while parting. In the evening, the
correct form is to say `Good Night’ while
taling leave. In the morning and afternoon,
one can say ‘Good Bye’ or even “Bye Bye”.
‘Good night’ is never used as a greeting, just
as Morning, Afternoon and Evening are
never used while parting.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Hello and Hi
• “How do you do?” are formal forms of
greeting. With the growing influence of
Americans, informal greetings such as
‘Hello’ and ‘Hi’ are now increasingly in use,
especially among the younger generation.
In the Army, it is now often used when
greeting colleagues and between ladies.
While parting, one can say “See you” or “Be
Seeing You” or “Bye”, if one wishes to be
informal.
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

Welcome & Bon Voyage

• Liaison Officers have the unenviable task of
receiving and seeing off VIPs. When
receiving, one should salute (if in uniform),
say “welcome to …….. Sir,” and shake the
hand, if offered. Saying farewells is a little
more complicated. One can say “wish you a
good journey” or “have a pleasannt flight”.
Depending on the mode of travel. If in
uniform, the salute should be given when
 ETIQUETTE
THE SOCIAL SCENE

car or train moves off, provided on is in eye

contact with the visitor. In case the VIP is
travelling by a railway saloon, or an aircraft,
one should salute before he boards. The
practice of saluting aircraft and trains, when
the visitor cannot be seen from outside, is
incorrect, and should not be resorted to.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(AND GUESTS OF HONOUR)

Who’s Who
• It is your duty to ensure that all guests are
quickly and properly introduced to one
another. If you just leave it to chance and
their initiative, you will and up hosting two or
three separate parties at the same time and
in the same place. If there is a chief
guest/eminent person/very senior officer, the
host/hostess must conduct him/her around
the gathering __ meet the assembly.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(AND GUESTS OF HONOUR)

Have More
• When offering drinks/eats around, it is
courtesy to insist if refused the first time. If
refused again, the guest either isn’t hungry
or there is scope to improve your cooking.
Move on. Don’t go ‘desi’ and dress on
regardless. Positively don’t dump food or
drink in his plate or glass.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(AND GUESTS OF HONOUR)

Circulation
• Make a round of the entire gathering
spending equal time conversing/looking
after each guest. If you get stuck with your
favourite person or gang, others will wonder
why on earth you had invited them over! In a
Service gathering, be warned not to go
‘brass hunting’ all the time.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(AND GUESTS OF HONOUR)

Looking After
• Don’t ask guests to ‘help themselves’.
They could do that better at home, and in
Pyjamas, too. You invited them so you look
after them! Specially the junior/younger
ones.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(AND GUESTS OF HONOUR)

Guess who’s coming to Dinner

If you have been a reasonable host, chances
you will get invited. As a guest, try and
remember following :-
• Rule No 1. Don’t make yourself ‘at home’. If
you do , it might be your last invite.
• Penetrate. On arrival, don’t plant yourself at/
near the entrance and cause a traffic jam
much to the chagrin of the host and hostess.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(AND GUESTS OF HONOUR)

Guess Who’s coming to Dinner?

• Move on and Meet. Circulate and help break

the ice. It is your business to go round
greeting eveybody who is already there.
Don’t park yourself too early in the evening, if
at all.
• Discretion. If your host/hostess is annoyingly
persistent on another drink / helping, quietly
accept and then discreetly plant the glass /
plate in a corner.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(APPAREL REVEALETH THE MAN)

Uniform

• It behoves an officer to wear freshly

laundered and ironed uniform every
day and to wear it with pride.
• Dress as the troops when in a unit.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(APPAREL REVEALETH THE MAN)

Civvies
• Informal and casual wear on a call / at a
function- Classically, ‘informal’ is a lounge-suit
and casual is tweed/blazer-and-trousers
combination. That is sartorial puritan’s position
in cooler latitudes – and he is very right too!
Practically and lower down the latitude scale,
‘informal’ should mean shirt-and-tie/shirt/and no
tie (colloquially ‘open collar’) in that order
depending upon the level of informality you are
prepared to risk.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(APPAREL REVEALETH THE MAN)

Civvies
• T-shirts, trend clothes, walking/sports shoes
and chappals of any description are solecisms
which one could well do without.
• Everything else is casual but do not drop your
discretion and guard and go overboard wearing
Bermuda shorts and Kolhapuris to a Mess
function or during a social call. In short, be
casual but don’t be a casualty.
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(SUMMING UP)

“If you insist on behaving like a door-mat,

there will be a hundred men wanting to walk
allover you”.
- Mark Twain
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(SUMMING UP)

To the segment of officer population

(mercifully small at present) which believes
that all this is a waste of time and they have
done remarkably well in the Service,
etiquette or no etiquette, only this can be
said : “Congratulations and God bless !
There are also many in the world who never
got / took the small pox BCG or polio
vaccines and still went on to celebrate their
80th birthday!!
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(SUMMING UP)

“Be fair, be honest, and be a

Gentleman.”
- Lt Gen PS Bhagat, VC
 HOSTS OF PROBLEMS
(SUMMING UP)

Pride, grace and elegance are the key

ingredients of that cocktail called ‘an officer
and a gentleman’ Junior officers are ‘officers
first, always and every time!!
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Punctuality

An officer must be exemplary in

punctuality. It raises his personal image.
Whether on duty or off duty, unpunctuality
means a lack of discipline and a lack of
consideration for others.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Parade Ground

• The parade ground of a Unit is held sacred

by all.
• One should not go across it in plain clothes
during working hours or on any occasion.
• Smoking or spitting on it must never be
done.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Correspondence

• Never address an offrs wife by her name.

• While corresponding with a senior offr,
Lieutenant Colonels are addressed as
Colonel, Major – General as General,
Lieutenant Commander as Commander,
Rear Admiral as Admiral and an Air Vice
Marshal as Air Marshal etc.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Correspondence
• A junior offr has to be very particular in
addressing correctly, using the correct
abbreviations. Lt Col Singh should be addsd
as “Dear Colonel Singh”. A senior officer has
more flexibility and in a private letter, he can
address a Captain Manmohan Randhawa as
“Dear Manmohan” or “My dear Mohan”
depending on the degree of his familiarity.
“Yours faithfully” at the end is more formal than
“Yours sincerely” and use of one is guided by
the acquaintanceship.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Name Boards
• It is customary that name boards at the offices
contain the officer’s rank, name, decorations,
and appointment or designation
• The name boards at the residence of an
officer should only contain the officer’s rank
and his name.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Obligations
• It is vital that an officer fulfils all his obligations
and in time.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Marriage
• It is the custom of the service that an officer
has to ask for the permission of the
Commanding Officer before marrying.
• After marriage, an officer should encourage
his wife to join in the activities of the Unit and
the Station. Although not governed by the
Army Act, she being the wife of an officer has
many obligations to the organisation he
belongs to. Army privileges and facilities are
always available to her and in her turn she
should contribute her part.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Loyalty
• Without loyalty an officer is neither here nor
there. It is the king-pin in the services and is
one of the essential qualities of an officer.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Loyalty
• Loose talks, criticism of seniors or the men
under the command of an officer can be
seriously detrimental. An officer is whole-soul
dedicated to his country, his army, his corps,
his regiment, his brother officers, his junior
and his men. He therefore must not run down
the corps, for that matter any other corps, and
its members. It is a sign of disloyalty which
everyone despises. It is an act of indiscipline.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Attitude to Orders
• An officer never apologises for an order. If a
senior officer apologises for an order, it is
considered as his weakness. If a junior
apologises, it shows disloyalty for his
superiors. An officer therefore carries an
order with total loyalty and to the best of his
ability. It there be any point with which he
does not agree or thinks it to be wrong, he
may express his views to his immediate
superior officer but he should not develop
ulcers or “belly-ache”.
 ETIQUETTE
MISCELLANEOUS
Attitude to Orders
• The following types of orders should be
studied by an officer and understood :-
• Regulations for the Army
• Standing Orders
• Routine Orders
• Army and Formation Orders.
 DRESS

Uniform and plain clothes

• All ranks will be in possession of uniform
and it will be worn while on duty.
• Plain clothes may be worn by officers when
travelling and when not on duty.
• JCOs, OR and NCs (E) may be permitted to
wear mufti of regimental / corps pattern
when off duty on appropriate occasions at
the discretion of the unit commanders.
 DRESS

Uniform and plain clothes

• A soldier will not leave his barracks /
quarters unless properly dressed and he will
not smoke in the streets, when on duty.
• No unauthorised ornament or emblem will
be worn with uniform. The wearing of a
signet ring is, however, permitted.
• Watch chains and trinkets will not be worn
with uniform so as to be visible.
 DRESS

Dress at Civil Courts

• Officers, JCOs, WOs, OR and NCs(E),
when attending a civil court on duty will
wear uniform.
 DRESS
Overall Combination
• At the discretion of COs overalls
combination (working clothing) may be worn
by officers, as considered necessary, for the
protection of their uniform. If authorised,
overalls combination will be worn at drill, for
working duties in barracks or camps and on
other occasions when their use will save the
men’s clothing. In cold weather overalls
combination may be worn over the usual
uniform, while in warm weather it will be
worn without the usual uniform.
 DRESS
Eye Glasses, Spectacles
• Eye glasses and monocles may be worn by
all ranks if so prescribed by the medical
authorities.
• JCOs, Wos, OR and NCs (E) when on duty
or active service, will wear only the
spectacles provided at the public expense.
• It is the responsibility of the individual
officer, requiring glasses for use in the field,
to provide himself with spectacles which do
not interfere with wearing of a respirator.
 DRESS
Sun glasses
• Wearing of sun-glasses with uniform will
be discouraged.
• Sun glasses will not be worn, except
under medical advice, on the following
occasions :-
• On ceremonial parades.
• When on quarter-guard duty or
inspecting a quarter-guard.
 DRESS
Mourning Bands
• Mourning Bands will not be worn with
uniform except by Christian Service
Personnel who are related to the
deceased.
• Mourning arm bands, where authorised to
be worn, will be of black cloth 8.25 cm
wide and will be worn round the left arms
above the elbow.
• Officers will not attend balls or dances in
uniform during the period of State
mourning.
 DRESS
Wearing of Uniform in foreign Countries
• Service officers will not wear uniform
when visiting or passing through foreign
countries.
 DRESS
Fancy Dress
• Uniforms must not be worn at fancy dress
balls.
 DRESS
Growth And Dressing Of the Hair
Non Sikh Personnel
• The hair of the head will be kept short.
• The chin and the underlip will be shaved.
• Whiskers and moustaches, if worn, will be
of moderate length.
 DRESS
Growth And Dressing Of the Hair
Sikh Personnel
• Sikh personnel will dress up their hair and
beard properly. ‘Thathas’ will not be used
over beard when in uniform.
• In the case of women serving in the Army,
hair will be neatly kept. Make up, if used,
will be inconspicuous. Highly coloured
nail varnish will not be used.