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Hannah Zeleznick
Professor Ditch
English 114A
September 2014
Our View, Their View, its Not the Same
Many things in the society us Americans live in today are characterized through media
and girls and boys wanting to just simply fit in. In Judith Lorbers article Night to His Day:
The Social Construction of Gender, and Claire Renzetti and Daniel Currans collaboration
article, From Women, Men, and Society, they both bring up the social construction of gender
and how we are influenced into who we are today. The social construction of gendering is part of
our everyday lives, we do it without even realizing it. Parents try to keep the idea of the typical
boy and girl alive today by treating them differently. I, myself do fit in with the times, but for
many others, they do not want to conform to the social construction that has been set in the new
society.
Boys and girls are often, stereotyped and set to certain standards. Girls are supposed to
look and act a certain way, and the same goes to boys. In Claire Renzetti and Daniel Currans
collaboration article From Women, Men, and Society, they bring up many items and ways that
girls and boys are different and how they are compared to be different. When children are
younger, mothers react differently if the child is a girl or a boy. In the article, Renzetti and
Curran mention that the mothers of girls were more sensitive to their children, while the
mothers of boys were more restrictive of their children (78). Mothers think that since boys are
stronger than girls, which they need to be taught to be strong at a young age. Boys are told that

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when they fall to get back up and wipe it off and not to cry because boys dont cry. Whereas girls
are comforted and told its okay to cry, this teaches girls that it is okay to be sensitive and to show
feelings. Boys are taught to hold back their feelings which can, and will, affect them later in their
life when they try to make relationships. Boys and girls should be taught the same and to have
the same feelings on the same issues.
When I was younger, my parents, mainly my mother, encouraged us to show our true
feelings and to be true to ourselves. My father was not exactly on the same page as my mom. My
dad was not around as much as my mom was so my brother, sister, and I adapted to the ways she
taught us. I was never much of a crier until recently, but my brother and my sister were the more
sensitive ones. When my brother would cry, my mom would comfort him just like she would do
with my sister and I. I would not say that my brother is a wossey, he is just more sensitive than
most of the boys his age. My brother is twenty years-old and lives in San Francisco to go to
college. He is still trying to find his way and figure out who he is. But he will always be very
sensitive because thats how he was raised. Just a few weeks ago, my brother calls up my mom
and is very upset because he has caught a cold and does not know what to do. My mom would
always take care of him, but now that he is away, he has to take care of himself which he is not
used too. Sooner or later, he will figure out to do things on his own, but for now, he is still that
little, sensitive boy who I grew up with.
Where people grow up and evolve play a big part in how people turn out in life. Judith
Lorber mentions on page 22 of her article that in most Western societies have only two genders,
man, and woman. Some societies have three genders. American society is very
determined to make sure that we only have to genders, male and female, when others know that
there can be more than just two. Many people of our society are very hard-headed when it

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comes to this topic because they do not want to accept a new way of life. They want to grow old
and know that when they are gone, that things will be the same as when they were alive. They do
not take into consideration that as the years go on, many people create new ways to live, such as
transgenders, gays, lesbians, asexuals, and many others as these. It is more of the older
generation now that grew up with these set traditions, and they feel as though they should be
carried out. Women in the fifties would wear dresses and skirts, the men would wear pants and
button up shirts. They cannot except the fact that time does change things and ways to live as
long as the people in that time. Until everyone accepts what our society is turning into and the
people as well, change will never happen or be accepted.
Although this topic of gender is not talked about regularly, it is a big issue in American
society today. Lorber, Renzetti, and Curran speak of write of this topic and choose to make an
argument about it because it is a big issue. Men and women are not just men and women
anymore. There are men trying to be women, and women trying to be men. Most of them are not
accepted by many people because many think of that way of life as wrong. But in order to live a
happy life, you must do what makes you happy. People nowadays think it is important to state
their opinion about every topic that is circulating in the media and news. This topic is important
because many people do live this type of life style. It may not be accepted by many, but it is not
stopping anyone from living how they want to live.
Many people, in order to fit in, play roles to show that they are with the times and can
be accepted just by what is on the outside. Gender roles are all performed differently. Girls who
want to fit in, play the role of a girl who dresses up every day with many layers of makeup and
nice smelling perfumes and wearing all different types of high heels. Boys who want to fit in
play the role by sagging their pants so that their underwear shows, also wearing good smelling

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colognes and wearing socks that go up past their ankles, and many also wear snapback hats with
different logos on them. But what would happen if a woman tried to sag her pants or dress like a
boy, and likewise for a male to wear female clothes. These brave souls who switch roles are just
acting and playing a role at who they really are. Everyone today plays a role at who they really
want to be. So why does it matter if the roles are changed? Thats who they are on the inside and
they are just trying to prove it on the outside and not lie about who they really are.
Todays American society does not allow many people to act and be who they really
want to be. These issues and topic are explained in Judith Lorbers article Night to His Day:
The Social Construction of Gender, and also in Claire Renzetti and Daniel Currans
collaboration article, From Women, Men, and Society. The topic of gender in todays society
can become a heated debate. Not everyone is accepted at who they really are on the inside and
out. People of the older generations do not accept what is becoming of this generation and do not
approve because we are not the same way they were when they were younger. Boys and girls are
also treated differently based in the social construction of what a girl should be treated as when
she is younger, and same for the boys. Conforming to the way American society is now is not
giving up completely; it is just giving up who you really want to be and giving up a happy life
that should be happening instead of one trying to please the people of this society. The social
construction of gender will always be there, but when will a society learn to let it go and just be
happy with the people they have no matter what gender or sex they may be?

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Works Cited
Judith Lorber, Night to His Day: The Social Construction of Gender from Paradoxes of
Gender. Copyright 1994 by Yale University Press.
Claire M. Renzetti, Daniel J. Curran and Shana L. Maier, Growing Up Feminine or Masculine,
from Women, Men, and Society, 6th Edition. Copyright 2011 by Claire M. Renzetti, Daniel J.
Curran, and Shana L. Maier. Reproduced with permission of Pearson Education, Inc., Upper
Saddle River, NJ.