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Weekly WALKING DEAD Commentary Episode #314 Prey Aired on March 17, 2013 . . . .

aaah screw it, Im writing what I want this week


Screw commentary, lets speculate and get kinky! Writing this as a service to my fellow Walking Dead fans, I have decided, in one lazy essay, to dump all our crazy sexual fantasies that may have arisen while we were watching TWD. And dont say you dont think about this stuff because you all do! To wit:

1) Carl is subvertively nailing Beth behind Herschels back. You know those cowboy boots that Beth wears? Well, Carl's knocking them. The fact that Carl is 12 and Beth is 17 should not impede your enjoyment of this fantasy at all. When Beth turns 18? Well I guess the law will come and wait a second there aint no law left! 2) Some of you have indicated that there just might be a little more to Michonne and Andrea's relationship than we can see at the surface! I mean, here's two hot chicks, alone together, under duress. What could be more natural to do than well, each other? Now you know why Michonne is so pissed off when Andrea starts doing it with the Governor. Theres two episodes left for them to engage in a hot-chick battle royale! Heck, Woodburys already got an arena.

3) You think Merle lost his hand cutting it off on the roof in Atlanta? Nooooo! Heck, Merle quoted the Bible when he sat with Herschel. Thus he obviously had a super-deep relationship with his right hand and that's why he had to cut it off, because it offendeth him. Everyone who's read the Bible knows that. 4) Rick's also obviously been humping Beth on the sly. But he doesn't want Carl to know, because, you know, he's done that whole three-way thing before with Lori and Shane and look how that turned out. I predict drama ahead. Battle-royale 2? Arena? 5) The Governor? I think he might have actually raped Maggie. I mean we didnt see did we? Could this definitively lead to Glenn raping Andrea as payback? Take that in your remaining eye Guv! 6) I suspect that the Governor, Martinez, Shupert and the other Woodbury guy that never talks have all nailed (perhaps multiple times) Karen, or as we should call her, Hot WallGuarding Girl. If peace is made with Woodbury, HWGG will be a good ambassador and nail one or more of the Prison-Crew. My moneys on Rick.

7) Michonne nailed Oscar during the 20 minute intermission they had between the hermit bunker and invading Woodbury. Thats plenty of time. She was eyein him steady!

8) Daryl and Carol had been doing it big time. That's why Daryl tried to leave the prison with his brother. He fears commitment and only came back because he wished to realize his one true love: RICK. 9) But Id be a happy man if Michonne tries to replace Andrea with Carol. Axel suspected as much! As a result, I predict a Daryl and Michonne throw-down. The Sword vs. The Arrow. They are truly going to get medieval on each other's arses, for the crime of coveting their opposing loved ones arse! I welcome you all to solicit your own theories as well!!

Until next week, during the apocalypse, F*** it!!!