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Aseel Faraj Mr. Newman English 1 22 November 2013 Waiting Can Be a Positive Thing About six percent of women cannot get pregnant in the United States. With that being said, should women delay motherhood? Many agree, just like me, that before having a baby women should make sure they are living in a secure environment to provide for the new infant, also making sure that we know the consequences of having a child at an older age. Some might disagree and mention how harmful it is for the infants health to wait too long. As these things might ponder our mind sets we also have to consider the fact that many treatments are failing but there are other alternatives like adopting. I personally agree that mother hood should be delayed for our personal benefits. There is no should in this story: women are delaying, globally (Gregory) in this article the author does her own research on this topic to find out that women all over are delaying motherhood. The average age at first birth for American women is 25.6 (Gregory) Many women delay on being a mother is because they want to make sure they have a stable relationship and a career just to be sure they can provide for their infant. According to CNN news, the median average cost to raise child is about $241,080.00, not including college expenses. Raising a child is difficult enough with both parents providing as a couple, but what about single mothers? Becoming a mother in young adulthood may take an especially large toll on African American women because their families often lack the resources to help them overcome the challenges if continuing their education and a career (Gregory) Teenage

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pregnancy is very stressful. Many teenage parents are the only ones with the income to take care of the baby. Many women see that with a career it makes it easier on them to not struggle with everyday expenses. Women can afford things that are mandatory for a baby. Access to health care is also more difficult for this group... (Gregory) the most important appointments to any individual are the doctor appointments. Checking on your infants health is a priority and it makes parents anxious because it is difficult to tell what is exactly wrong with the baby because they cannot speak to inform his/her mother what he/she is feeling. Healthcare is becoming more and more costly, which results in many people not having health coverage overall. Having health care is a very important factor that delayed on motherhood you wouldnt have to deal with it just because waiting till you had enough you would had to avoid this problem. Women figured out early that delayed motherhood provides a shadow benefits system in our family-unfriendly world (Gregory) The reason for the delay is that women noticed that in order to have everything for their families means that they need have things planned out so they can prepare. Having a stable income, shelter, food, and enough for medical bills then thinking about starting motherhood is an overall benefit. Kari Stefansson, a neurologist from Iceland, stated Women have been warned for several decades that the older they are at the time of their childs conception, the greater the risk that the child will be born with a disability... Women are constantly reminded of consequences of having a child at an older age. But every situation has its pros and cons. Although a child does have a greater risk on having a disability like autism and schizophrenia it turns out that young mothers, who, in early observations of our data at deCOD Genetics, appear to have a greater risk of A.D.H.D., autism, and schizophrenia. (Stefansson) So seeing that research is improving itself we can be less nervous about deciding on having a baby in little later in life. Also another

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positive finding is that, on balance the children of older mothers do better in terms of health and well-being than the ones of young mothers. (Stefansson). Unfortunately, women go through menopause, which means that they can no longer conceive children. In some cases, menopause is not the reason women cannot conceive. Sometimes women dont have a reason on why they are unable get pregnant. Other might say that women who are older have a greater risk for treatment to fail. I.V.F. failure rates as high as 68 to 78 percent in women ages 35 to 40, and 88 to 95 percent among women 40 to 44.(Zoll). I say that just because there is a bigger risk doesnt mean you cant find other options. I agree that although women should wait to become a mother, they should not wait too long. If some women choose to put off motherhood until it is no longer possible, adoption is a possibility. Jill Totenberg is adoptive parent whose reasoning was that, At 45, I met Brian unfortunately, he had been fixed At first Totenberg really didnt mind not having a child in her life but one day she realized, the fulfillment of work could not replace the fulfillment of being a mother. When Totenberg finally made her decision to have a child with her circumstances, she made it possible by adopting a child from China. It is the best thing I have ever done (Totenberg). This shows that it was alright that she knew she cannot have a child but she kept her options open and having a successful career and a household allowed her to still adopt and be a healthy parent. I would have been a terrible parent when I was in my 20s and 30s (Totenberg) so the fact she waited on motherhood didnt mean she was running out of ideas. I feel so lucky the adoption miracle gave me the time to grow up and gain the patience and insight to be a better mother. (Totenberg) By waiting she had a secure environment and was finically stable. With that, I firmly stand on why I believe that in mother hood should be delayed. Even if with 6 percent of women that cannot conceive children, adoption is still an open choice,

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making motherhood also an option. Women who have fears of giving birth or qualms about going through with a pregnancy can also adopt. Women without a significant other can also adopt and choose to become a mother through adoption. In conclusion, being a parent is a tremendous responsibility that needs careful thought and preparation, along with resources. Waiting will only benefit the family at the end. Being a teenage parent is hard and stressful, and even having a child in your 20s while not being mentally or financially prepared takes a toll on the individual. As time goes by research is improving and showing new information in relation to delaying parenthood. For example, conceiving at an older age will actually improve the infants health and cognitive development. Although treatment have a high percentage of failing especially for older women; women can always adopt a child and still fulfill their parent roles.

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Works Cited Gregory , Elizabeth . "A Delay Can Empower Women." (2013): n.pag. Web. 25 Nov 2013. Hicken, Melanie. "Average cost to raise a kid: $241,080." (2013): n.pag. Web. 25 Nov 2013. Stefnsson, Kri . "Men Shouldnt Delay Fatherhood." (2013): n.pag. Web. 25 Nov 2013. Totenberg, Jill . "I Adopted a Child and Have No Regrets." (2013): n.pag. Web. 25 Nov 2013. Zoll , Miriam . "Know What Youre Doing If You Decide to Wait." (2013): n.pag. New York Times . Database. July 10, 2013.