Third Heaven Archive 3

Iblis: What is it...?
I have no business with you.

Not yet.
Gabby: everybody know's stuff's fricked
Jaime: oh hey, he can say something normal
Gabby: i don't give a good gosh dang your uncle sam is a motherfricker
eldritch s. (GM): my computer continues to eat shit
Mobile L: Fuk
Jaime: i spent a year covered in it, don't complain
eldritch s. (GM): and then got your hand cut off
Jaime: hey, i got a pretty bitching beard in the process
eldritch s. (GM): i miss the beard
Jaime: i miss my long hair
Mobile L: Lemme put my dogs up
Jaime: my long, golden locks
Mobile L: Back in a sec
Jaime: so how did i wipe my ass back in king's landing?
i mean
toilet paper?
eldritch s. (GM): you didn;t
tyrion just comes in and shoots everyone who takes a shit
Mac D.: space
space my beloved where are you
Jaime: yeah, what about the horse
tyrion didn't shoot it
eldritch s. (GM): yeah he did
offscreen
Jaime: touch...
Mobile L: Murp
eldritch s. (GM): everyone in king's landing has to hold iti n
or tyrion shoots them
Fawkes M.: Like Darius O'Dyna
eldritch s. (GM): yes
Mac D.: GRIMBO
eldritch s. (GM): and when he finally thinks he's safe
Mac D.: BRING ME MORE FOOD
eldritch s. (GM): and takes a dump
Mac D.: JOHNNY IS HONGRY
eldritch s. (GM): he get's shot
Mac D.: JOHNNY IS HOOOONGRY
Fawkes M.: Even if it ain't Westeros
eldritch s. (GM): in all timelines
turr is close enough to westeros
seeing
as there are walls
and winter's comin'
Fawkes M.: What about Fuyuki?
Mobile L: Look, I found Maybe Older Gabby if she turned into a stupid dork: http
://2.bp.blogspot.com/-3JfbMoiTuk8/UjwFaMabFzI/AAAAAAAABsM/j5TQP_opy7Q/s1600/K+ha
ppy+copia.jpg
Fawkes M.: Or Death Note Tokyo?
Play her, Mobile
Mobile L: But I don't know what her future holds yet
eldritch s. (GM): https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKZ0VNnAuiU
Fawkes M.: Is the Sakura of the FG a vampire?
eldritch s. (GM): no
Fawkes M.: Exactly
Mobile L: Or what on earth would mellow the tempest that is her out
Damn...
eldritch s. (GM): meds
Mobile L: Gabby doesn't need meds, they disappoint her

Mac D.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9rmUq1a4VG4
Mobile L: Now I need to find another Possible Future Gabby who looks high-strung
holy shit Jon
Fawkes M.: Dictator Gabby
No Pepsiman
Disappointing
Space: kept you waiting, huh
Fawkes M.: He's Forrest, Forrest Gump
People call him Forrest Gump
Space: forrest looks different
Jaime: eyy, forrest! you lost weight...
Forrest: boo
Jaime: oh, you're just fat
meh
Narrator : Now that Mu has left the room, it feels as if it has taken on a diffe
rent air.
Gabby:
Jaime can't help but look around the room, to see if it seems different
Forrest: ...Well that felt like a bit of a waste of time.
Steph: ...
Narrator : The air is lighter.
Steph is just thinking quietly
Narrator : The door to the Second Heaven opens up.
Gabby is THINKING HARD about the Naomi thing
Gabby:
...Welp, uh...
Forrest: ...That our way out.
Steph: Yeah.
Jaime: Probably.
Gabby: Yep.
Forrest: Alright, I assume nobody has anything to do here.
Teddy Reinside: Age before kids!
Teddy Reinside charges out
Gabby:
>:/
Jaime: I think we should, fir-...
Gabby follows
Forrest: ....
Steph gets up and hurries after
Jaime to the bat-pole
Forrest: ...He's enthusiastic.
Forrest looks over at Nathan and Suzie
Narrator : The rest of them follow after
Forrest: ....
Forrest follows
Gabby: ...Ah frick...
Steph: ...Okay.
Forrest: ....Alright, so where do the monsters usually hang out.
Narrator : The door hovers in the air, moving sligtly
Jaime: ...
Gabby: Basically right here.
Steph: We've only ever fought one.
Forrest: Oh.
Gabby: When the school is fricked up like this, that means, uhm... yeah.
Forrest: Nice to know I'm basically in the same boat of inexperience.
Narrator : It's a long hallway.
Steph: Yeah, you're not -- we're all out of our league.
Narrator : At the end there's an ominous looking door.
They kind that would have something like:
Forrest: Maybe if we combine all our strengths, we'll even out to something medi
ocre.
Narrator : "DON'T DEAD OPEN INSIDE" plastered on
Gabby: Frickin' better than nothing, right?
Mac D.: welcome to season 1 of the walking dead kids
Jaime: Well, there are more of us now than last time.
Steph: Lets just, um... get going.
Ken: There's no use dewlling on our ignorance.
Forrest: Oh good. Our odds have improved.
Gabby caaaaautiously steps forward
Narrator : gabby is immediatly killed
Gabby: frick you
Narrator : Well.
It's safe to say.
It's not a minefield
Steph: .me hangs in the back of the group
Forrest watches Gabby walk, carefully following behind
Gabby goes ahead and pulls out her nice Ayn Rand book
Jaime leads with his long, hard spear
Teddy Reinside: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Mind
{(
19
+
7
+
13
)}+1
= 14
Gabby flips it to an especially annoying part
Teddy Reinside is peaking into a doorway
Steph: ...?
Steph looks back at Teddy
Teddy Reinside: Holy shit...
Fawkes M.: How do you peak into a doorway?
Gabby: ...What?
Steph: What is it?
Forrest looks back at Ted as everyone else does
Forrest: Is it a monster.
Steph: ...close the door.
Teddy Reinside: very carefully
Jaime glances back, not taking his attention entirely off of the front
Teddy Reinside gently shuts it

Gabby: ...Uhm. Wow, frick...
Steph: ...Jesus Christ...
Gabby: Like, um... like how many?
Teddy Reinside counts on his fingers
Teddy Reinside: Ten.
Gabby: ...Friiiiiiiiiiick.
Teddy Reinside not even close
Jaime: ...How big?
Forrest: .....That was fast.
Steph: They weren't as big as that other one.
Teddy Reinside makes a vague gesture
Steph: They were smaller.
Teddy Reinside: This big.
Gabby: Probably faster, or something.
Jaime: Hopefully not stronger.
Forrest: Is it Go Time.
I still don
Steph: ...Is it?
Steph looks back
Forrest: *I still don't have a weapon, you guys get in front of me.
Steph: Hey. I just have my notebook.
Jaime: Should we start moving forward?
Ken: The man said we just have to get to Tartarus...
Gabby: That'sthat's how monster go, right? The little ones are the frickers who b
um-rush you, and the big ones are the beefy ones?
Forrest: Maybe in video games.
Jaime: ...And Tartarus could be anywhere.
...?
Steph: From, uh... what he said, they'll always keep coming.
Forrest: But in real life the small ones could just as easily rip you in half wi
th their bare hands.
Steph: Clearing them out won't help us much.
Jaime nods
Gabby: ...Well frick. Yeah, um... Maybe Tartarus is the door...?
Fawkes M.: Is that black square a door or something?
Narrator : yes
to nirvana
it's following them
Gabby: I mean, like... That door isn't usually there, so, um...
Forrest: Isn't that the door we just came out of.
Jaime: Seems like it.
Gabby: No, the one at the end of the hall. The nasty one.
Jaime keeps advancing
Forrest: ...Oh, the one that says Don't Open.
Gabby: Like, what even is a fricking tartarus?
Narrator : he explained it
Jaime: ...It's a gum disease, right?
Mobile L: ohp. Disregard, I suck dix
Steph: You guys...
Suzie: That's tartar.
Jaime: Right.
Forrest: ....You keep using that word.
How old are you again.

Fourteen, right.
Gabby: ...Me? Yeah. Uh. You got an issue with my vernacular?
Forrest: You know when I was fourteen I said fuck all the time.
Ken: Tartarus is a portion of the greek underworld.
Steph: Now isn't the time, you guys...
Ken: This can wait.
Gabby: ...Mrrrghh.
Gabby >:c
Forrest B|
Steph :v...
Nathan: Ew, wait.
There's some, uh...
Blood, on the floor.
Forrest: Blood, huh/
Gabby grumbles and keeps the especially annoying part of Atlas Shrugged marked w
ith her finger
Steph: Is it... fresh?
Gabby: ...Yeah, wow... Nice.
Forrest: ...Really adds to the ambience.
Gabby: ...frickin'...
Gabby CAUTIOUS ADVANCE...
Gabby only looks kinda scared and mostly just seems done with all this bullcrap
Steph is deeply frightened and trying not to show it
Forrest has had the same tired and grouchy look he's had since the moment you me
t him
Jaime still keeps his Gay Bulge at the ready, trying to remain focused
Gabby gives her glasses a frustrated little push up the ol' nose-bridge and forg
es on
Narrator : i just got a gift
Fawkes M.: What was it?
Narrator : like that shirt with the wolf on it
only
with a pug
Fawkes M.: Awwww
Mobile L: Awwww!
Space: thats sick
Mobile L: I have one kinda like that, except it's an orange cat
Narrator : Teddy and Nathan both slip on tbe blood.
Wait;
Does that mean it's still wet?
Fawkes M.: Bakas
Gabby: ...Frick. Uh. You guys okay?
Jaime: ...
Jaime they've got this - keep vigilant, Lancaster
Forrest: ...Do you think we weren't the first people through here, recently.
Teddy Reinside: I'm fine, I'm a-okay.
Gabby just tries to stay ready to Atlas Shrug a motherfricker
Nathan: It's just a little blood!

It doesn't scare me!
Gabby: ...'S a possibility... That, or, like... the monsters eat each other.
Forrest: rolling 3d20 +1
(
18
+
18
+
2
)+1
= 39
Nathan it freaks him out
Mobile L: Holy God, forrest
Space: strong american
Forrest: It's a disturbing situation, you don't have to act tough.
Nathan: Whah...?
Steph: It really is not the time for this.
Forrest: I'm sure everyone else is just as scared as you are.
Narrator : The door stares her down.
Gabby: ...frickin'... so close...
...better not be any frickin' dumb crap behind that goddang door, I frickin' swe
ar to god...
Nathan: But I'm not scared!
Forrest: Uh huh, right.
Gabby BRACE... YOURSELF... MY DEARRRRRR
Jaime: ...Can we not?
Nathan: Yeah, I am right.
Thanks.
Steph: You guys...
Forrest: Eyes open, hero.
Nathan nods
Nathan: I'll keep 'em open.
Narrator : The door groans open.
Space: what does nathan have against steph
that look he's giving her
Jaime resists the urge to bonk Forrest over the head, as he stares down the door
Gabby winces a bit and peers through... oh man... oh god
Narrator : wait a moment please
Gabby ...GOOD FRICKING THING I AM INVINCIBLE AND NOTHING AFFECTS ME AHAHAHA fric
k what the heck is this godforsaken hole
Steph: its mosnters
Mac D.: "hello"
Jaime: sup
Mac D.: "it's a surprise party"
Jaime: yaaaaaay
Mac D.: "we have made you a cookie pie"
Jaime: does it have ice cream?
Mac D.: "no"
Jaime: then PERISH
Mac D.: "but it does have BLUUUUUUUUUHD"
Jaime: ATTAAAAAACK
Mac D.: am i the only one here who's watched baman piderman
Narrator : yes
Fawkes M.: Probably

Narrator : The signs say they came from the cafeteria.
Space: ive seen it
Narrator : And that the Archive is up ahead.
This plae is really grungy and shit.
Steph: The archive...
Narrator : Through the window can be seen a butchery.
Forrest: Does it mean the library.
Steph: ...
Gabby: ...Ewwwww, frick that...
...God... Bleh. Nasty.
Forrest: .....Wonder what this place was serving.
Jaime: Just keep moving forward.
Gabby: People. You know it was frickin' people.
Forrest: Judging by the overall theme of the place, yeah, it was probably people
.
Gabby: So frickin' sick of this bullcrap...
Teddy Reinside: Wh- that's disgusting!?
Forrest: Would be a little silly for a rotting death school to serve beef.
Teddy Reinside: *no question mark
Why are you talking about eating people?
Gabby: Blehhhh...
Steph: ...What if it's... tofu?
Forrest: Would you prefer it if we walked through the scary building completely
silent.
Oh, yes.
Steph: Maybe we're in a vegetarian rotting death school, heh heh...
Forrest: The monsters are vegetarian, we're saved.
Gabby: Nyeheheh... Frick...
Forrest: I suppose tofu bleeds, too.
Gabby: They gotta get it to fool the vegans somehow.
Steph: That's just food coloring.
Forrest: Well then in that case, why don't we give the monsters a fond hello.
Get some vegan cooking tips.
Gabby: Oh, I'm gonna give 'em a frickin' hello, alright...
Forrest: Shouldn't you let the guy with the sharp stick take point.
Teddy Reinside: You know, that's really twisted.
Forrest: A light mood could be helpful in maintaining group morale, you know.
Teddy Reinside: We're in some hellhole full of monster's, and here we are talkin
g about tofu?
Forrest: You're showing excellent skill in being a buzkill.
Teddy Reinside: We're hunting for the truth, not playing games!
Gabby: Gotta keep it going somehow... Yeah, Jaime, you lead, I'll be right behin
d.
Jaime: As much as I hate to say it, Forrest has a point. At least stay behind me
and Ken.
Gabby: Just move over if anything looks like it needs some Randing.
Forrest: The truth isn't going to be offended by our bad jokes, I'm sure.
Steph: ...Are those voices, uh... where are they even coming from?
Gabby: The tofu, duh.
Space: move forrrrrward
Gabby: Nyehehehaha...
Steph smiles a little bit
Forrest: Do tofus have orgies.
Teddy Reinside: will you fucing move
Teddy Reinside gumbles under his breath
Gabby: ...Ewww, pfffft...! I mean, 's plants, right? Plants aren't monogan... mon
o... faithful to just one person.
Fawkes M.: We're forming a cafeteria line

Forrest: I'm in the cabboose here, sir. Can't exactly go anywhere.
Jaime watch yer corners, boi
Gabby: Probably get their gross spores all over the place, fricking like that...
Forrest: You three taking in the sights.
Suzie peers from side to side
Steph: Tofu spores?
Suzie: I didn't know tofu was a fungus.
Forrest: It's not.
Suzie: Someone should tell the spores that.
Jaime tries to peek around the corner, with the caution that comes from a man in
a firefight
Narrator : there's willem dafoe with a gun
Steph calls up to Jaime
Steph: Do you see anything?
Forrest: Do I have the make humorous horn-honking gestures to make this traffic
jam go any faster.
Narrator : he screams "IT WAS A FIRE FIGHT!!!"
Jaime: Hang on...
Narrator : other than that, it's clear
Jaime: It's clear.
Narrator : Wait.
Jaime: ...
Narrator : Roll mind just to look a little deeper.
Jaime: ...Wait.
Gabby: 'Kay, grea?
Jaime: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + -1 for Mind
{(
9
+
9
+
12
)}+-1
= 8
Mobile L: we're DEAD
Narrator : Yeah it's fine.
Space: the most frightening thing in the world:
a failed perception roll
"...yeah, nothing there"
Jaime: ...Stay behind me.
Nathan: Why are these hallways so narrow...?
Steph: Oh, it's a... should we split up?
Forrest: Doing a bang-up job at that, don't you worry.
Jaime starts to advance
Forrest: ...I'm sorry, what.
Gabby: Because they're built for vegans.
Steph: There's, like, an intersection.
Teddy Reinside: That's ridiculos!
Forrest: You never, ever split the party.
Teddy Reinside: You never split up, haven't you ever seen a movie?
Forrest: Do you want somebody to die.
Jaime: They're right.
Gabby: ...Yeah, uhm. Gotta side with Forrest here, we gotta stick together.
Steph: I mean, if it was like everyone going off on our lonesome... but what, th
ere's at least eight of us here?

Four that way, four that way...
Suzie: What if there are four monsters either way?
Nathan: ...
Forrest: I have little faith in eight-to-one odds against a monster as it is.
Nathan: That means there'll be eight monsters.
Steph: Okay, okay...
Gabby: It only works on Scooby Doo, and even then, frickin'... they're not allow
ed to kill people on Scooby Doo.
Forrest: Can we not mess around with the current ratio on our end, please and th
ank you.
Narrator : Jaime boldly goes.
Fawkes M.: BRB for a bit
Narrator : With Gabby.
Mac D.: you
piece of shit
Narrator : Shit literally dripping down the leg of his pants because he's been h
olding it in for a week.
Mobile L: I cannot not hear Forrest as cr1tikal
Mac D.: held it in so long his anus has prolapsed
Narrator : it's become ingrained
Space: we're going at the same speed we would have any way
Narrator : From the dark, a Nihilist!
Space: oh SHIT son
Mac D.: A GRUE
Narrator : It dances forth with perverse, fluid motions.
Steph: here's our chance for an all-out attack
Forrest: ....Is something going on over there.
Mobile L: ...Frick, a monster!
Forrest: I can't see around the corner, there's two asses in my way.
Gabby: i said that
Teddy Reinside: Speak for yourself!
Suzie: There's dfinitely a monster up ahead.
Forrest: Oh, good
Is it only one.
Jaime: Ye-Gabby: Just one, yeah!
Suzie: Oh, no, there's a second one.
Jaime: ...At least two.
Forrest: ....Great.
Gabby: ...Frick, nope, two.
Steph: Kill it!
Jaime: Right.
Nathan: ... I think it's kill THEM.
Gabby is RRRREADY TO ROLL FOR INITIATIVE
Mac D.: this is not what i envisioned the music for a fight with Mannequins to b
e
Jaime brandishes his long, hard spear
Space: i like it
Narrator : get used to it
Mobile L: They're dancing nihilists, it works
Mac D.: you know what you need to find
the fucking ship foghorn sound effect from SH2
that was the most horrifying shit
Narrator : i can find that
very easily
Space: lemme see if its on youtube
Gabby FRICKING LET ME ROLL FOR INITIATIVE YOU FRICKS

Space: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=o9i88E6Wb44
Jaime I'M WITH GABBY, LET US ROLL THIS FUCKING SHIT
Space: oh no thats not it
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zeeq2fYbfGY
Narrator : well roll then
Gabby: rolling 1d20
(
14
)
= 14
Steph: rolling 1d20
(
2
)
= 2
Jaime TIME TO LET GO OF THIS MONTH-OLD SHIT
Mac D.: no the foghorn was what i was talking about
Jaime: rolling 1d20
(
17
)
= 17
Space: damn it
Gabby: >:C >:C >:C
Narrator : rolling 1d20
(
20
)
= 20
rolling 1d20
(
15
)
= 15
Forrest: rolling 1d20
(
19
)
= 19
Narrator : you are dead
Forrest: guess again fucko
Space: go forrest go
Forrest: it's showtime
Space: he whips out a grenade launcher
(
12
)
= 12
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
= 12
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
= 20
Gabby: k-ken is hero...
Fawkes M.: Miracle Man Ken
Space: the hero approaches
Ken just summons his sword and throws it at a Nihilist
Space: it hits jaime in the lung
Ken: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 2 for Spirit
{(
3
+
14
+
14
)}+2
= 16
Jaime: ow
Gabby: :D
Ken: rolling 1d8 + 2 for damage
(
5
)+2
= 7
Gabby: c:
Ken 's blade cuts deep into it, slicing off a limb
Gabby:
Narrator : The Perverse Nihilist dances through the air in a really uncomfortabl
e manner.
Gabby: :>
Narrator : It flies onto Jaime, trying to wrap its legs around his midsection
Mobile L: Reminder that more art of Gabby exists https://cdn1.artstation.com/p/a
ssets/images/images/000/610/165/large/yewon-park-character2.jpg?1443931597
Narrator : Roll to dodge
and you know what
Fawkes M.: Can he roll to counterattack?
Space: sick sketches
Narrator : fuck you, decreased
sure
decreased if you want to dodge
because
look
at this fucking hallway
Mac D.: wouldn't it make more sense for the counterattack to be the decreased ro
ll
Narrator : granted
shut uo
Jaime isn't gonna dodge that shit in this narrow hallway, instead going for a st
raight thrust to catch it
Fawkes M.: I presume this ain't decreased?
Narrator : nope
Fawkes M.: Aww yeh
Jaime: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Finesse
{(
12
+
12
+
4
)}+1
= 13
Narrator : Jaime thrusts deeply
The spear stabs into it.
Mobile L: :-)!!!!!!!
Narrator : rolling 1d8 + 1
(
4
)+1
= 5
Jaime: Alright...
Narrator : Hey, Forrest.
You just immediatly go into action mode.
Forrest: ...
Narrator : It's time to solve a mystery.
Forrest makes his way to round the corner
Mobile L: let's do this shit
Forrest: 'Scuse me, Pardon me, Coming through.
Narrator : Forrest shove past everyone else
Steph: H-hey--!
Gabby: D:
Narrator : He pushes Steph into the wall.
Gabby:
>:|
Narrator : Nearly crushes Gabby.
Forrest: ....Wow, fuck, these things are nasty.
Gabby: ...Mmf... You'd better frickin' hit that thing hard.
Forrest: Alright, time to try out my new magic powers.
.........................
Narrator : forrest explodes
Forrest: How do I use my new magic powers.
What do you guys do.
Jaime: Are you serious?!
Steph: Make something up!
Forrest: Uh, okay. They explode.
.......
Jaime probably still has that Nihilist skewer
Forrest: I don't think making shit up works.
Steph: Oh my god!!
Mr. Mu: They shall come to you, my child, summon thy strength!
Gabby: Frickin'...! Just try whatever, that's how we learned!
Forrest: Wait fuck where'd you come from.
Mr. Mu is speaking from the doorway
Gabby: will you fricking please........
Forrest: ....Okay. I don't think I've ever summoned strength before.
Space: the two nihilists look at each other confusedly
Jaime: HOW ARE YOU A SAGE?!?!
Mr. Mu: literally just
Space: one still wriggling at the end of jaime's spear
Mr. Mu: attack in whatever fashion
you see fit
Forrest: ......
Gabby: D:<
Forrest stares at the Nihilist not skewered on the spear
Forrest: ............
Narrator : It thrusts its "hips" at him.

Gabby:
Forrest: .......
Gabby: |:<
Forrest points at it
Forrest demands in his mind that it reveal its concealed vulnerabilities to him
Gabby:
(
20
+
1
+
16
)+1
= 38
Gabby: ?:<
Space: kick it in the dick
Narrator : Its joints seem to pulse with a lot of... dark ichor. Hitting those m
ight cause its life to drain quickly.
Forrest: ...Hey, Hair Gel.
Hit that one.....there, there, and there.
Gabby did, um... did he even do anything, or...?
Forrest makes the ichor-spewing joints light up
Jaime: ...
Hair gel?
Gabby: !
Narrator : It's like a nightlight.
Forrest: Go.
Gabby: ...Whoa, frick. Just do what he says, Jaime!
Jaime pulls out the spear, then goes for those joints
Jaime with the spear
Fawkes M.: Increased?
Mobile L: Can we have this increased please?
Narrator : what does the trait say duff
Fawkes M.: Seems like a bolster to me
Forrest: Tears away the Layers of Deception to reveal an enemy's "true self." Se
lect a single target. That target takes an extra die of damage from all successf
ul attacks until the effect is applied onto a different target.
Fawkes M.: Oh
Narrator : also duff forrest needs a plus one in one stat
{(
19
+
11
+
3
)}+1
= 12
Mac D.: he has one
in mind
Jaime: phew
Narrator : it didn't say on the sheet for some reason
Mac D.: odd it says on the sheet for me

Fawkes M.: BRB again
Narrator : Jaime removes his spear from the stabbed one
And thrusts into the joints of the second one.
rolling 2d8 + 1
(
3
+
8
)+1
= 12
Space: ka-pow
Narrator : Ichor everwhere
Forrest: ..Gross.
Gabby: ...Friiiiiiiick! Dang, that's...
Narrator : The second one curls up for a moment.
Forrest: Took one for the team, there. Good job.
Narrator : Before letting out a bloodchilling sound
Forrest: ...!
Gabby: !
Forrest covers his ears
Forrest: ...Shit...That's loud...
Gabby ummmm ahahaha... frRIIIIIIICK
Steph: Is-- is that an air raid siren??
Gabby: JIMMINY FRICKLE CHRISTMAS
Narrator : There is a rapidlyly approachign sound from the other hall.
Steph: ...!!
Gabby: ...Um. Um what's up there.
Narrator : A legless Nihilist begins clawing towards the party
Mac D.: ALEX SHEPARD SAVE US
Mobile L: Eeheehee
Narrator : And tiny, knife-wielding Nihilists rush up behind the dancing ones.
Mac D.: HARRY MASON SAVEUS
Space: midgets
Gabby: ...Ahhhh FRICK.
Gabby gets on her RAND FACE
Forrest: ...Odds are tipping against our favor.
Gabby: I am frickin' in a tipping mood, then...!
Mobile L: can I go
Forrest: ...Do you have to say it all the time.
Gabby: YES I DO.
Narrator : yes
it's your turn gab
Gabby FORGES AHEAD VIOLENTLY
Gabby: HUP!
Gabby GETS OUT THAT ONE PASSAGE OF ATLAS SHRUGGED
Gabby RRRRRRRAND CANNON at the little guys...!
Gabby: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Mind
{(
3
+
8
+
12
)}+1
= 9
Mobile L: shit and fuck
Narrator : The Nihilist kicks the book out of her hand.
Gabby: MOTHERFRICKER
Gabby is SO MAD NOW
Steph: Fuck... how many of them are there?!
Narrator : The Fearsome Nihilist immediatly takes a horrible swipe at Suzie
Forrest: Are there more over on your end.
Gabby: FOUR OVER HERE, HOWEVER MANY UP THERE.
Steph: There's one with claws!
Forrest: Yeah we're dealing with four over here.
Gabby: THAT IS FIVE THEN.
Narrator : She tries to jump back
Forrest: Is it one of those big ones you were talking about.
Steph: It-- it's huge!!
Narrator : rolling {3d20kl1} + 1 for decreased Finesse
{(
8
+
19
+
1
)}+1
= 2
Space: jesus shit goodbye suzie
Mac D.: thus ends the storie of suzoe
Narrator : It just fucking craves into her
Forrest: How huge.
Mobile L: fuck
(
1
+
4
+
4
)
= 9
Steph: NO!
Forrest: "No"'s not really an answer.
Gabby: WHAT. WHAT'S HAPPENING UP THERE?
Suzie screams
Forrest: ........Oh.
Gabby: ...FRICK!
Nathan charges past her
Forrest: Things are going bad up there, I think.
Nathan: Hey, buzz off, freak!
Gabby just makes an enraged, incoherent noise
Nathan goes to punch it in the mouth-vagina
Space: it's gonna bite off his hand
Nathan: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
9
+
15
+
12
)}+1
= 13
Space: oh shit
Mobile L: NATHAN YOU A GOOD BOY
Forrest: Not exactly the glorious end I'd hope I'd get out of this.
Nathan: rolling 1d8 + 1
(
7
)+1
= 8
Gabby ANGRIER NOISE
Narrator : Nathan sends its head to the side, where it meats the wall with a mea
ty sound.
Forrest: Torn apart by my first monster encounter, next to a kid making weird no
ises.
Gabby RRRRRRRRGGHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...!
Suzie looks down at her bleeding gash
Forrest: Maybe with my added girth it'll take them longer to rip me apart.
Suzie calms down instantly
Forrest: You could probably get a decent running start if I was taken out first.
Gabby just has the look of someone who wants to commit grievous acts of violence
in retribution for wrongdoings but cannot
Gabby: . . .
Suzie turns to Steph, with iron in her eyes
Suzie bolsteres Steph
Steph ...
Steph starts writing in her book at the Fearsome Nihilist
Steph: [G O T O H E L L]
Fawkes M.: AAAGH what'd I miss
Steph: rolling {3d20kh1} + 1 for increased Finesse
{(
14
+
3
+
16
)}+1
= 17
Suzie: things are getting shitty
Mac D.: we's fucked boyo
Mobile L: Suzie got hurt
Space: suzie got clawed to shit
Suzie: The words fly at the Nihilist
rolling 1d8 + 1
(
2
)+1
= 3
Gabby seethes quietly and waits for her opportunity to grab her crap back
Narrator : The G gets it, but it paws the rest of the letters away
Steph: Got it!!
Fawkes M.: Ah, hell
Forrest: Are things improving on your end.
Steph: -- God dammit!
Gabby: .........
Narrator : Ken goes to stab it in th juggular
Gabby: >:C
Ken: Get back!
rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 2 for Spirit
{(
16
+
10
+
8
)}+2
= 12
Gabby oh frick, Ken
Ken: rolling 1d8 + 2
(
6
)+2
= 8
Mac D.: what should forrest's weapon be, when/if he gets one
Gabby ...OH FRICK, KEN! :D
Mobile L: Be like Gab and take up the book of violence
Narrator : The Perverse Nihilist returns to the object of its...
Space: spirit javelins
Mac D.: errbody's gota book
Narrator : Interest.
Space: ghost atlatl
Narrator : Jaime.
Jaime: hi
Narrator : And tries wrapping its legs around his midsection again
Space: intangible glaive
Forrest: ...Watch out, Hair Gel. It likes you.
Space: haunted halberd
Gabby: FRICK IT UP.
Jaime: I know, I know!
Space: a gun
Mac D.: what do you think, seer
Narrator : a magnifiying glass that shoots lasers
Mac D.: you know that's exactly what i was thinking
Mobile L: Yehhhh boiiiii
Jaime goes to stab it in one of the leg joints, intent on maiming it
Space: no a gun
Mac D.: shoots searing heat beams that burns away deception
Mobile L: Perf
{(
13
+
13
+
15
)}+1
= 14
Narrator : Okay.
Now.
That's also decreased, but that doesn't matter.
Because that was a fairly complicated thing.
To specifically
Get it in the joint while it's juqing and jiving.
Space: Westeros Jesus
Mobile L: But he dood it
(
4
+
7
)+1
= 12
Jaime: imma just that good
Narrator : Its limbs just blow off.
And it withers and dissolves on the floor.
Jaime: Hah!
Forrest: Nice work.
Mobile L: I think I only have another 45 minutes to an hour, y'awl
Jaime: There we go!
Mac D.: YOU CAN DO IT
Gabby: GOOD.
Teddy Reinside just stares at all of this
Mac D.: YOU CAN PERSEVERE
YOU
CAN
GO
Steph: D-did you get it??
Mac D.: ALL
THE
WAY
Forrest: Yeah, we got one.
Jaime: I did! One of them, at least.
Teddy Reinside: Uh...
Mobile L: ehehe no i cain't, or i will be in trouble with people
Teddy Reinside is tempted to jump into the door
Forrest: You should probably pay attention to the big one.
Teddy Reinside grabs a rock from the floor and throws it at the Fearsome Nihilis
t, not even using his powers
Teddy Reinside: rolling {3d20kl1} + 0 for decreased brawn
{(
20
+
18
+
1
)}+0
= 1
Space: holy shit
if it wasn't decrease
Teddy Reinside throws the rock at it
Space: look at that fucking roll

Mac D.: it embeds itself into one of suzie's gashes
Narrator : It becomes
Absolutely enraged.
And goes ballistic on those next to it
Steph: G-gh-!
Gabby: !!!
(
1
+
7
)
= 8
rolling 2d8
(
3
+
2
)
= 5
rolling 2d8
(
1
+
2
)
= 3
Gabby: KEN!
G-GUYS!
Gabby oh frick... ohhhh frick...
Gabby: ........
Gabby this just...
Gabby MAKES ME...
Teddy Reinside: ...
Gabby A N G R I E R
Teddy Reinside: Oh.
Forrest: ...Alright, let's finish up over here before everybody gets mulched.
Gabby RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGHHHHHHHHHHH
Jaime: ...dammit.
Forrest stares intently at one of the smaller Nihilists
(
16
+
19
+
2
)+1
= 38
Jaime: You're not gonna ask again, are you?
Steph: Wh-- what the hell was that?!
Narrator : Honestly these things are just one big weakpoint.
It would take nothing to rupture their thin skin.
Forrest: .....Those small ones are fucking tissue. Go nuts.

Space: im picturing the midget nihilists just going
Narrator : The nives, however...
Space: 'nyehehehehehe' as they run
Narrator : Those aren't very nice.
Forrest: ......
Gabby: hey no that's my laugh
Forrest: .....Don't let them cut you, though.
Teddy Reinside: I-I Wh- I was nervous!
Jaime: Thanks, thanks.
Forrest: Honestly I'm appreciating this combat role I'm settling into.
Steph: I-it's gonna be fine! It's gonna be oka
Forrest: Telling other people to hit things on my behalf.
Jaime go go gadget skewer attempt from a distance
Steph: *okay!
Jaime on the tiny one
Gabby would encourage him but is too FRICKING TICKED ABOUT THIS WHOLE THING
Fawkes M.: Normal Finesse?
Narrator : you know
it's a really small target
Fawkes M.: Fiiiine
Space: slash downwards instead of skewering
Jaime: 2late
rolling {3d20kl1} + 1 for decreased Finesse
{(
3
+
8
+
18
)}+1
= 4
Narrator : sidways would be the better method but space doesn't know shit abotu
shit
Space: no room sideways you chump
Narrator : Jaime misses the fucker as it runs.
Forrest: ...A for effort.
Watch the knife.
Narrator : It just bolts to him and tries to shank him in the ankle
Jaime: ...Whoa!
Gabby: D:<
Jaime tries to lift his ankle up in time
Fawkes M.: Finesse?
Narrator : sure
{(
19
+
4
+
6
)}+1
= 7
Narrator : Jaime gets a poisoned knife to the ankle.
Forrest: ....Shit....
Jaime: Agh--!

(
6
+
5
)
= 11
Gabby: FRICK.
Jaime: Think I... get what you mean...
Gabby has FRICKING HAD IT... WITH THESE MOTHERFRICKING NIHILISTS IN THIS MOTHERF
RICKING ROOM
Forrest takes a step back
Forrest: Get the small ones first, small ones take priority.
Narrator : The Perverse Nihilist that summoned these fucking things goes to kick
Gabby in the face
Space: imagine
just a few hours ago
Gabby: ARRRRRRRGHHHHHH!
Space: they were pretending to be european powers in history class
Gabby tries to get her Bookbag of Void out in front of her face before it can
Mobile L: What stat?
Narrator : spirit or brawn
Gabby: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 0 for Spirit
{(
7
+
15
+
13
)}+0
= 13
Fawkes M.: I legit thought that the half dozen sessions after the Archetype awak
ening was all one night
Mac D.: i feel like forrest is the spotter in an mmo raid
Forrest: whelps
left side
even side
many whelps
now, handle it
Mobile L: He's keeping this thing afloat
Space: LEROOOOOOOOOY
Narrator : It was about to get her right in the eye, but its limb bounces off th
e book
Jaime: yeah i fucking get it thank you very much
Forrest: what the fuck was that
Space: JENKINS
Forrest: that's a fucking 50 dkp minus
Gabby: ...........
Jaime: you actually play that shit?
Gabby: FRICK YOU ALL
Gabby GETS THAT FRICKING BOOK
Gabby FLIPS TO THAT FRICKING PASSAGE
Space: just picture mobile with a copy of atlas shrugged by her computer
Gabby TRIES TO RAND THESE LITTLE FRICK-BUTT DONG-EATING POOPLORDS TO FRICKING DE
ATHHHHH
Space: hastily transcribing shitty speeches
{(
8
+
6
+
5
)}+1
= 7
Narrator : who is john galt
Mobile L: hbdhouwuihfbwdhuifw3hfeuhifuhiwhuifhiuf3ihuf3wiuhfehui
Narrator : It just fucking kicks the book again.
Mobile L: UBde89y23y8r2fih8u39 u0[r3 uy8r\
8hr98yr98y46rtu89i
shit shit shir shit shit
Fawkes M.: Those 35K words is probably gonna be her finishing move in the final
battle
Mac D.: gabby is going to have a fucking gein-styled anger induced heart attack
Space: the whole battle is just to bide the enemys time
Mobile L: Good thing she is so young
Fawkes M.: No, Mobile will
Space: so gabby can finish it
Mac D.: gabby the destroyer
Gabby:
Narrator : The Fearsome Nihilist goes to gore its attackers on its claws.
Gabby: EEEEEEEAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRGHHHHHHH!
Forrest: ....I don't think they understood you.
(
15
+
10
+
13
)
= 38
rolling 3d20
(
19
+
13
+
15
)
= 47
Fawkes M.: She then proceeds to shut the Third Heaven on everyone else
(
18
+
3
+
8
)
= 29
Forrest: I could barely understand you. Half of that was angry gibberish.
Space: ooh
Jaime: ...nnngh...
Space: *oof
Gabby is in no mood
(
2
+
5
)
= 7
rolling 2d8
(
2
+
5
)
= 7
Mobile L: ahahahah man okay
Forrest: i'll go get some glue
Fawkes M.: Does this campaign have a dojo?
Narrator : Ken...
Steph: the meat shields are serving their purpose admirably
Narrator : He's not doing so hot...
Gabby GYEG&PEGOYOE&@T&RB^R@Ê@Ê&@&E@&Ê&^BE@*YENYN
Narrator : Nathan goes to just give it another haymaker
rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
14
+
18
+
3
)}+1
= 15
rolling 1d8 + 1
(
7
)+1
= 8
Gabby
Fawkes M.: What ethnicity is Nathan?
Narrator : good question
Mac D.: aryan
Fawkes M.: Good Question Jesus
Mobile L: He looks vaguely Hispanic
Space: Dweeb Jesus
Narrator : his last name is pyrce
Mac D.: really he just looks like a mildly tan white guy to me
Space: yes
Mobile L: Tan Anglo Jesus
Narrator : Suzie dodges out of the way of the claw
Space: i had this conversation with seer, all of the npcs are white
Mac D.: gosh mobile are all your white people pale as the newfallen snow in texa
s
Fawkes M.: Even the black ones?
Mac D.: you racist
Space: well all the students at least

Narrator : She looks at Steph again, that same uncomprimising look in her eyes
SIEG FUCKING HEIL
Mobile L: We can't go outside because it's too hot to live
;_;
Steph grits her teeth, writing at a breakneck pace
Steph: rolling {3d20kh1} + 1 for increased Finesse
{(
10
+
18
+
10
)}+1
= 19
[DIE]
(
7
)+1
= 8
Fawkes M.: KIRA
Gabby still vibrating with sheer fury while it isn't her turn again
Fawkes M.: I AM THE KIRA
WE ARE THE KIRA
Narrator : The D gets lodged in its mouth
Fawkes M.: EVEN YOU KIRA
DOY
Forrest: ...Breathe.
Space: oh my god
Gabby ANGRY BREATHS
Space: the d is stuck in its mouth
Gabby actual froth
Narrator : Ken goes to decapitate it.
Forrest: .....
Mobile L: Munching on the D
Narrator : rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 2 for Spirit
{(
13
+
20
+
4
)}+2
= 15
It's dead.
Forrest takes a teensy step away from gabby
Gabby have you ever seen such an angry child, Forrest
Narrator : It dissolves into black, lumpy paste
Steph: I-it's down! It's down!
Forrest: Oh, good.
Gabby: IS IT
Forrest: Please come help before Hair Gel dies and the child explodes.
Steph: Oh, god... a-are you guys okay?
Narrator : The second little asshole goes past Gabby and tries to stick a knife
in Forrest
Forrest: I don't feel safe.
Gabby: JAIME IS POISONED.
Forrest: ....!
Jaime: ...ghh...
Forrest tries taking a big step back to avoid the knife thrust
Narrator : that pnt for air
Forrest: rolling 3d20 -1
(
10
+
3
+
3
)-1
= 15
Narrator : was jaime
Gabby AAAAAAAAAAA WHY IS IT NOT MY FRICKING TURN
Narrator : Forrest was stuck with a knife
Forrest: ...!
(
6
+
8
)
= 14
Forrest: Gh-.......
Gabby: MOTHERFRICKER THAT IS IT I HAVE HAD IT
Fawkes M.: Which archetype is analagous to a healer?
Forrest: Would you quit......screaming....
Narrator : caregiver buffs
probably can heal
Fawkes M.: What about Sage?
Space: sage debuffs
Teddy Reinside: I'LL HELP YOU!
Mac D.: i give buffs and debuffs but i don't heal
Fawkes M.: Dammit, so much for Savior Teddy
Forrest: oh god, please no....
Gabby ...
Teddy Reinside: Uh, uh...!
Jaime: ...
Steph: You can- you can do it!!
Teddy Reinside just begins freaking out
Forrest: .....
Forrest looks up at Teddy
Teddy Reinside: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Mind
{(
3
+
1
+
14
)}+1
= 4
Teddy Reinside passes out
Forrest: .......
Gabby: ..........
Jaime: .........
Steph: ...........
Gabby ENRAGED
Teddy Reinside: wait
Forrest turns to punt the Nihilist what stabbed him
(
1
+
9
+
9
)
= 19
(
4
)
= 4
that's for you, forrest
that's from the poison
Forrest: ...Gck....!....
Narrator : Forrest is too fucked up from the poison to kick straight
Forrest clutches his wound, actually changing his expression for fuckin once to
wince in pain
Gabby FRICKFRICKFRICKFRICKFRICKFRICKFRICKFRICKFRICK
Narrator : and jaime
Forrest: ....Stop.....
(
1
)
= 1
Jaime: ...Dammit...
Narrator : for you
Space: hes made of sterner stuff than the fat man
Gabby is there an off button on this child, probably not
Mac D.: you'd think a fat man would be affected by poison slower
Jaime doesn't feel like thrusting at anything anymore, so he just tries to sweep
-slash at the small Nihilist
Narrator : Jaime's drank some really bad shit before, he'll be fine.
Space: jaime's probably taller than forrest
Jaime: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 0 for Brawn
{(
15
+
17
+
11
)}+0
= 15
Narrator : It pops into black slude
Fawkes M.: Gonna decrease that?
Space: ~kingsguard jesus~
Jaime: ...Heh... heheh...
Forrest: ....You missed one...
Jaime: ...
Narrator : The Perverse Nihilist goes to kick Gabby in the face again
Jaime: ...!
Forrest: ....
Gabby tries to suck it the frick into the fricking backpack that is a fricking b
lackhole she is SO FRICKING DONE
{(
5
+
4
+
12
)}+0
= 5
Narrator : you know
i'm going to allow that
Mobile L: Thank
Narrator : don't rool
Mac D.: no
Narrator : it's going in the pack
Mac D.: no let gabby's rage go white hot
Gabby: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFRICKYOUUUUUUUUUUUUU!
Fawkes M.: It's gonna be important in the final battle
Forrest: ........
Narrator : There's still that
Fucking
Midget
Forrest: ....
Gabby: ........
Jaime: .....
Forrest stomps on it
Narrator : Jumping around
Gabby was gonna do that but was beat to the punch
Narrator : Splat.
Steph: ...I-is everyone okay?
Forrest: ....Problem solved.....Gh...
(From Jaime): You still live on the RP?
Forrest: ....No.
Gabby hhhhhhhhhhrrrghh...
Jaime: ...Not exactly...
Gabby: ...They're both poisoned...
Forrest: ...Who's dead on your end.
Steph: No one's dead, um... guys, are you okay?
Forrest: I just said No.....
Gabby does that post-angry thing where you pant
Steph was talking to the npc fucks
Forrest is poisoned and can't see

Ken: ...
Jaime now using that spear as a crutch
Ken: We're fine.
We're all fine.
(To Fawkes M.): yep, posted
Forrest: ...Where's that fucking door....
Steph: Okay, um... anyone who thinks they can do-- like, first aid or something,
help out quick.
Ken: Ken walks into Nirvana
Forrest hobbles over and knocks on it
(From Jaime): Arigatou
Gabby: ...Does anyone frickin'... have healing powers or whatever?
Steph: Try to -- are you supposed to suck out the poison? Use a tourniquet?
Mr. Mu: Hello!
Steph: Uh...
Gabby:
Steph clutches her notebook protectively
Forrest: Yeah, hi......You got tylenol or something....
Mr. Mu stands in the doorway
Steph goes over to Teddy
Mr. Mu: I have not any mortal medicines.
Steph checks for a pulse
Forrest: Okay....You got medicine for creepy knife poison.
Mr. Mu: But some rest in Nirvana may help with the venom in your veins.
Forrest: ....Are you-.....hrk...How's a fucking nap gonna help.
Steph: C'mon... wake up...
Mr. Mu: Nirvana is the state for which you want for nothing.
Teddy Reinside opens one ye
Forrest: Oh for fuck's.......Fine, fine......Everybody in the door.
Teddy Reinside: ... Holy shit!
You're not dead!
Forrest stumbles his way though
Teddy Reinside sits up
Steph: We beat them, get up...
Gabby: ...Frickin'... You heard the man, get in the goddang Nirvana.
Gabby goes to help Jaime in
Steph: Uh-- okay, c'mon.
Steph sits down against the wall
Forrest looks at the other npc kids
Gabby is still residually mad and looks like an angry little radish
Jaime: ...Urgh, thanks...
Forrest: .....Christ, you look like shit.
Gabby: ...Sure.
Mr. Mu is pristine as always
Fawkes M.: Jeezus, Ken

Gabby looks concernedly at Ken
Mr. Mu: everyone gain ten hp
Steph: i didn't get hurt at all :^)
Mac D.: what happened to ken i didn't see
Mr. Mu: ken has 30 hp to start with
Forrest: applause for the fucking coward everybody
Fawkes M.: We type this in?
Mr. Mu: not max hp
Gabby looks him over concernedly
Mr. Mu: current hp
but yes
Steph: ...That was-Mac D.: my current life's no listed
Ken seems very revitilized
Steph: ...
Ken: ...
there i did it for you
Forrest: Nobody died
Gabby oh thank god... and science, mostly science.
Gabby meek shoulder-pat
Steph: That was too close...
Jaime: ...Agh.
Forrest: I wonder if they're all like that.
.......
Jaime: It's a lot nicer when there's just one.
Forrest: ......Hey.
Forrest looks at Steph
Gabby: Y-yeah, no goddang kiddin'!
Forrest: You have a notebook, right,
Ken: ...
Steph: Y-yeah.
Steph holds it up
Forrest: Give it here.
Steph: No.
Forrest: 'Scuse me.
Steph: What do you need it for?
Forrest: I need to write something down.
Steph: I can write it.
Gabby:
Jaime: ...
Mr. Mu: Please, do make use of our facilities!
Forrest: What, you don't think I have legible handwriting or something,
Mr. Mu: There is a computer here.
Mobile L: Gotta sleep in like, twenty
Space: he shows it off like the lady on the price is right
it's got a spotlight on it
Jaime: 1000
that's the price i name
Mr. Mu: show me the money
Gabby: 750!
Steph: You're supposed to have your own notebook for school.
Jaime: bitch, i'm a lancaster
Mr. Mu: you're both wrong you fucking idiots

Forrest: It's my first day.
three bucks
Mr. Mu: it's 0
Gabby: frick you gotta hell
Jaime: yeah, but i'm clos-Forrest: oh cool does that mean i win
Jaime: eff off
Gabby: *heck
Steph: So?
Jaime: no, gabby
fuck you gotta hell
Mr. Mu: you get the shitty computer
Jaime: that's how you fucking say it
Forrest: Didn't exactly have time to buy school supplies yet.
Gabby: i will not taint my lips with swears
Forrest: What with the unpacking.
Steph: Okay, just use his computer.
Mr. Mu stands by the computer
Forrest: Are you serious
Steph: That's what it's there for!
Forrest looks at Mr. Mu.
Space: don't check mr. mu's browser history
Gabby continues to linger by Ken
Forrest: ...Does that have a printer to go with it.
Ken is just quiet
Gabby:
Mr. Mu: Allow me to see if I cannot retrieve one...
Forrest looks back at Steph
Mr. Mu walks out the door
Fawkes M.: It's Monji's history
Forrest: Just let me borrow the book.
Fawkes M.: Mr. Monji Mu
Space: its just picvtures of rin
Steph: No!
Gabby isn't sure if she should say something, or... I mean, maybe he needs the q
uiet...
Mr. Mu: rin's gaping vagina
Jaime: Guys, can we not?
Forrest: What is so important about that freaking book that you can't let me hav
e it for ten seconds.
Mobile L: *defenseless anus
Fawkes M.: Knew it
Steph: It's mine, that's what. Tell him, Jaime.
Mr. Mu: steph drew dicks all over it
Forrest: You know, sharing's something they teach you in kindergarten.
Jaime: How would you feel if I just took something of yours, Forrest?
That isn't sharing.
Steph: Thank you...
Forrest: How is that a comparison.
Gabby oh god are they really...? mruh...
Ken coughs a bit

Forrest: I'm asking to borrow the book for a brief moment.
Jaime: And she said no.
Teddy Reinside: Uh...
Gabby:
Teddy Reinside pulls out a checkboo
Gabby pat pat...
Forrest: I would like a valid reason as to why I can't.
Teddy Reinside: You can write it on the back of one of these!
Forrest: Is there porn in it, is that why.
Steph: No!
Jaime: Because she said no?
Forrest: Do you use it as a diary.
Teddy Reinside: Hey, kid!
Space: his checkbook is empty, like his bank account
Gabby god u guise...
Forrest looks at the checkbook
Teddy Reinside gives him a check with nothing on it
Teddy Reinside: Use this!
Forrest: .....
Gabby fricking americans...
Forrest looks at it.
Forrest: ...
Forrest looks around to see if there's a stapler
Gabby jimminy fricking chrysler
Narrator : roll mind
(
20
+
10
+
11
)+1
= 42
Ken: ...
Steph is very displeased
Steph clutches her notebook closely
Narrator : He finds a rusty old piece of shit stapler.
Jaime this guy is literally and figuratively gonna weigh them down
Space: tubby
Forrest: ......
...Figures. Alright, gimmie the checkbook.
Narrator : jaime is just cruel
Teddy Reinside just hands it over
Teddy Reinside: I wasn't going to use it anyway.
Forrest: I'll need something to write with.
Forrest takes it
Teddy Reinside pulls a pen out of his pocket
Teddy Reinside: Ahah!
Forrest: Alright, thanks.
Forrest takes the pen
Teddy Reinside: A Reinside always comes prepared.
Space: i love teddy
Jaime: (Thank you, Teddy...)
Space: he's useless, but he has heart
Mobile L: He tries so hard
Ten minnits
Fawkes M.: Jaime's shifted away his Sage hate
Forrest jots things down on the back of two checks, and tears them out, grabbing
the stapler and walking over to Steph
Steph: ...
Narrator : each one has a word on it
"FUCK" and "YOU"
Jaime: ...Do you have to staple it on?
Forrest: I want you to staple these into your book.
Narrator : he staples it onto jaime's face
Forrest: Is that too much to ask, Your Highness.
Steph: Okay, explain why.
Forrest: Read them.
Gabby ...gawd... why can't he just go back to texas or wherever...
Steph takes them to look at
Ken: Are you alright, Gabby?
Space: "oh, i am now that you're talking to me, ken~~"
Gabby: ...Y-yeah, uhm... I'm fine... Just kinda got overwhelmed with the fight..
.
Suzie rubs the mark where the gash was
Forrest has written analyses of both the small and perverse Nihilists on each re
spective check, pointing out their properties and weak points (joints, poison kn
ives, etc.)
Steph: I could have just copied these down in the first place...
Steph staples them to the back cover
Gabby MURRICANS ARE ALL THE SAME, RRRRGHH...
Steph: *inside back cover
Forrest: And I could have written them down and given the book right back to you
, but you wanted to make things difficult.
Nathan: I was pretty overhwelmed too.
Gabby LAME AND MEAN AND FAT AND DUMB JUST LIKE DAD... STUPID DAD...
Nathan: ...
Steph: I don't like giving people my notebook, okay? Jesus Christ.
Nathan: It was kind of scary.
Gabby: ...Yeah... You... You guys did good, though...
Forrest: It's a notebook.
Gabby sighs
Steph: Yeah, I know it's a goddamn notebook.
Teddy Reinside: Stop it, you kids.

Forrest: Do you just don't like other people touching your things, is that it.
Gabby: ...Wish I coulda done more, but... oh well, I guess...
Teddy Reinside: Just cut it out.
Jaime: And Teddy's a Sage. Does that mean that we don't need y...
Steph says nothing
Forrest: ....
Teddy Reinside: Okay, I might not be the smartest one here.
But I'm the oldest.
Forrest looks back at Jaime
Teddy Reinside: That means I'm in charge.
Forrest: You're right. We do have more than one sage, don't we.
Teddy Reinside: So just stop, please, for the love of Christ.
Gabby ...rrrgh... really is like dad... maybe a bit more tolerable, but STILL...
Space: i still have that mental voice of teddy
Teddy Reinside: Can't hear myself think with all thise fighting...
Space: of that one guy who called the radio station saying saskatchewan winters
are godawful
Forrest: Which means I suppose the two of us are expendable until one croaks.
Jaime just doesn't listen to Forrest, looking over at Teddy
Jaime: Sorry about that.
Steph just
Teddy Reinside: It's fine, just don't keep it going.
Steph gets to grumpily writing in her notebook
Gabby ...fricking... go back to texas, seriously...
Teddy Reinside: Hey, uh, kid.
Teddy Reinside gestures to Forrest
Teddy Reinside: What's your name?
Forrest: ...It's Forrest.
Suzie: ...
We all could have died, but we didn't.
Steph: ...Hey, Jaime, could you come look at this?
Gabby: ...Mmmmyep.
Forrest: Yeah, we're lucky.
Jaime: ...
Teddy Reinside: I'm Teddy Reinside.
Jaime goes over to Steph
Forrest: Nice to meet you.
Steph points out something in her notebook
Teddy Reinside: Head of the Reinside Institute for the Truth.
Forrest: The Truth, huh.
Teddy Reinside: Yeah, I study the conspiracies of the world.
The Bohemian Hunt.
Los Illuminatos.
Aliens.
The Pope.
Jaime: ...
Jaime nods
Forrest: Los Illuminatos....Haven't heard of that one.

Jaime: Don't mention it.
Steph smiles up at him
Steph: ...
Steph looks over at the shitty computer
Ken: How did your side of the fight go?
Gabby cleans her glasses off with her sweater
Forrest: None of us died, either.
Narrator : It's old.
Gabby: ...Uhh... Pretty crap. We managed, but pretty crap.
Jaime smiles back, and then follows her gaze over to the computer
Steph: Wanna try it out?
Gabby: Gotta fricking... glue this stupid book to my hands, apparently...
Steph pushes herself up off the ground and walks over to it
Forrest: Have you considered finding a wristband to attach it to.
Narrator : It slowly starts up, with a lot of noise.
When it gets going, there's no internet connection.
But it has Word.
And some files.
Folders.
Steph: ...Jaime, look, it's kind of shit.
Gabby: 'S fricking... what, two pounds? It'd have to be made outta, like...
...Maybe duct tape...

Steph starts browsing through the files that are already there
Jaime: Probably as old at this place.
Narrator : It has a non-offensive, default background.
Hm...
These have odd names
Forrest looks over at Nathan
Steph: Maybe someone else left notes too?
Narrator : PROJECT-00567_DR.L_REP.
Forrest: How'd you do, Tough Guy.
Narrator : And such like that.
Steph: ...?
Gabby mutters to herself and goes into RELEVANT MODO because I must sleep, beeb
beeb
Steph opens that one up
Space: night mobile
Narrator : It's corrupted.
Mobile L: G'naight
Steph: Fuck.
Nathan: ...
Steph tries some more
Nathan: Hey there.
Narrator : Most are just corrupted.
Some are...
Forrest: Think you can tell me anything about the monster you guys fought.
Narrator : Password locked.
Forrest: I didn't manage to get a good look at it.
Steph: ...This is crap...

Jaime: ...Do you think this is actually Mu's?
Steph: I think, uh...
Nathan: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + -2 for Mind
{(
3
+
16
+
9
)}+-2
= 7
Uh...
It had...
Claws.
And this weird head.
Steph: Either he... requisitioned? It? Or there's other people who used it befor
e us.
Forrest: ...Okay.
Nathan: And it was..
Steph: Official-sounding people.
Forrest: Claws and a weird head.
Nathan makes a gesture
Nathan: This big.
Steph starts poking through the other folders and whatnot
Forrest: Okay...Claws, a weird head, and it was big.
Can you go into detail about the weirdness of the head.
Jaime: ...What'd he say about the snake-pin guys, again?
Narrator : "DR. L_PROJECT_INTRO"
Steph: From what I can tell, they aaaare... Belmont High alumni. We need to figu
re out when, uh... that is to say, we have some of those guys's names, we can ju
st look them up in the school files or something. I dunno. Maybe if we could fin
d some old yearbooks in the library...
Steph tries opening this one
Jaime: Maybe this was theirs?
Nathan: It was..
It had teeth.
Steph: Let's see if it, ah...
Nathan: All over its mouth.
Which was big.
Forrest: ...You mean, teeth where teeth shouldn normally not be.
Narrator : It's fucked up too.
There is one next to it
Steph: Fuuuuuck this...
Forrest: .....
Narrator : "SFTH_STATEMENT"
Steph clickity clickity
Narrator : It's partially fucked up
Forrest tries to make an educated assumption on the monster's potential weakness
es/strengths from nathan's dumbass analysis
(
19
+
13
+
6
)+1
= 39
Nathan: It had big teeth...
Narrator : RIght probably the mouth.
Forrest: ...Alllllright.
Forrest scribble scribbles in the checkbook
Jaime: ...How exactly do you corrupt data?
Forrest: You've been a boon to science, buddy.
Steph: Do you think they did it intentionally?
Mac D.: can i get a journal called Forrest's Super Duper Monster Tips
Jaime: Well, what if they didn't want anyone to read it?
Narrator : "We, the Society for the [Fucked up] have [...] Through mutual will,
and [fucked up] [really fucked up] Iblis, and [fucked up] to the Second Heaven.
[fucked up] know that I will continue, with or without any of you. - S.K
Steph: Yeah, good thinking...
...
Narrator : sure duff
Mac D.: c:
Steph: ...S. K...
Narrator : in the coffe
Mac D.: clear as a crisp spring morning
Steph tries to think back
Narrator : "remember steph, he was number one"
yeah none of the one's whose names you know had s for a name
maybe the one slick douche
Steph: I'm... not sure those initials ring a bell, no.
Narrator : maybe one of the other people who you didn't meat
who even knows
Jaime: No one?
Jaime himself tries to recall
Narrator : Stephen King!
Stepanie Karloman..., uh...
Steve... Kjobs...
Jaime: ...Steph.
Steph: Yeah?
Narrator : Saskatchewan is commonly abbreviated to SK
Jaime: Are... do you have any relatives with a first initial "S"?
Steph: There's me, for one. Um...
rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + for Mind
{(
9
+
17
+
9
)}
= 9
Narrator : Steph really can't recall her parents' given names.
As they're dead.
Space: i call shenanigans
Mac D. rips the check out of the checkbook and walks on over to Steph and Jaime
Forrest: yes me
Narrator : fine fuck you
Forrest: I've got another one.
Narrator : fucking prick

Her mother's first name was Samantha
Steph: .....
Jaime: ...
Jaime turns over to the Interrupting Forrest
Jaime: Can I see it?
Forrest: ...What're you guys doing over here.
Steph: Uh -- another, um... you got the stapler?
Forrest: I gave it to you.
Narrator : Her father's was Horhay.
Steph: ...Oh.
Look at this.
Forrest nonchalantly hands the check to Jaime and looks at the computer screen
Space: Jorge
Forrest: What is it.
Jaime checks that out
Steph points at the mildly fucked file
Narrator : i'm jokign that's really dumb, it was george
Fawkes M.: Spartans really don't die
Even after Assassin shoots them
Forrest please see "Big Teeth" in: Forrest's Magical Monster Manual
Narrator : "We, the Society for the [Fucked up] have [...] Through mutual will,
and [fucked up] [really fucked up] Iblis, and [fucked up] to the Second Heaven.
[fucked up] know that I will continue, with or without any of you. - S.K
Jaime just stuffs the check into his pocket, then turns back to Steph and Forres
t
Forrest: ....What's this about.
Steph: S.K.. Do you see that?
Forrest: Yeah. Anyone I should know about.
Steph looks uncomfortable
Steph: Samantha Karloman.
Forrest: ...Who's that.
Jaime: .....
Steph: My mother.
Forrest: ...Oh.
Narrator : i had to upload this myself
Space: you're doing gods work
Forrest: Do you think she wrote this.
Steph: I don't know.
Lots of people have those initials, it's a big world.
Narrator : stephen king
Forrest: Yeah, so why do you look like you think it's her.
Narrator : stanley karling
Steph: She...
...
Narrator : that's her uncle
stanley
Forrest: Does your mom have ties to this whole thing you know about.
Steph: I have no idea, okay?
Jaime: Can we not?
Forrest: These are important questions.
Steph: I don't want to talk about it.
Narrator : https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SK
Steph moves to shut the computer down

Forrest: ...Do you know something, but don't want to say anything.
Forrest puts a hand in front of hers
Forrest: Hold it.
Space: swanky kong
Steph glowers at him
Steph: Fine.
Narrator : Sren Kierkegaard,
Forrest has his typical expression.
Steph gets out of the chair
Narrator : he did it
Jaime: ...Ugh.
Narrator : undisguised hatred for the fatman
his name is on the signs
Fawkes M.: There's a difference between a fatman and a fatass
Forrest: We're not leaving this subject until I know for sure you don't actually
know anything.
Space: kaysen
Steph: I don't! Okay? Oh my god!
Narrator : keyton
(
12
+
20
+
10
)+1
= 43
Narrator : forrest keyton
Does she, space?
Space: can i roll to see if she does
Narrator : i guess
Steph: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + for Mind
{(
6
+
18
+
10
)}
= 10
Narrator : Steph can't be sure.
Space: this is as i had figured as well
Narrator : She might kno something.
But she might not.
Everything pre-car crash is touch and go
Forrest: ...I'm not convinced that's the truth. And I don't think you do, either
.
Steph laughs
Forrest: Did I say something funny.
Steph: Are you-- you're serious? Aren't you?
Oh my god.
Jaime: ...
Jaime sighs, folding his arms

Steph: Look - just stop. Okay? Stop bringing my dead parents up.
Forrest: Oh, they're dead.
I wasn't aware of that.
Well, now I know why this is tough to talk about, at least.
Steph: Okay, are we done here?
Narrator : mu comes out, he's playing the sax
Forrest: No. I want to know what you know about your mom.
Space: richard moneypenny is playing the piano
Jaime: Look, just-Forrest: This is important.
Steph: I barely know anything about her. Okay?
Forrest: Is that why you're suspicious of the initials in the email.
Jaime: Can I ask something about you?
Steph: Yes! Okay? Jesus...
Forrest looks at Jaime
Forrest: Okay, let's hear it.
Jaime: Do you know how to take a hint? For, well, anything?
Space: did mu find the printer
Forrest: I do, and I always don't.
Got any more questions.
Space: i love forrest
Narrator : Mu holds an old printer in his hands
Mac D.: this oughta be forrest's theme y/n
Space: y
well not now
this is mu's theme
Jaime: ...You know? I'm not going to question that, just because I know it won't
go anywhere with you.
Mr. Mu holds it like it weighs nothing
Forrest: That's a stupid mentality that won't get you anywhere.
Mr. Mu sets it down
Forrest looks at Mr. Mu holding the printer
Forrest: ...Oh, hey.
Space: "hello children~"
Mr. Mu: I am here to serve your needs.
Jaime was about to say "let me tell you a story about a guy named Aaron", but st
opped when Mu walked in
Forrest: Where'd you get the printer.
Space: beheaded
Mr. Mu: I retrieved it.
Jaime: "burn them alllllllll"
Forrest: From.....
Mr. Mu: From Styx.
Steph is looking fairly upset now
Steph walks back over to her spot
Mr. Mu: One can search through the tides to find refuse of the First Heaven.
Forrest: ...Alright, whatever. Will it print like a regular printer.
Mr. Mu: Yes.
It is perfectly operational.
Forrest: Do we have to get it connected to the computer.
Jaime watches Steph go

Jaime: ...
Mr. Mu just does it
Jaime decides to follow her back
Forrest: ....Wow, impressive.
Mr. Mu: It should give you no issue.
Steph: ...He's just a real asshole. Holy shit.
Forrest: Alright, this oughta be better for recording info than checks.
Thanks, I appreciate it.
Mr. Mu nods
Forrest looks at the files and such on the still-running computer
Mr. Mu: It is my duty.
Forrest: ....Hey, one more thing.
Mr. Mu looks down at him
Mr. Mu: What is it?
Forrest gestures to the files on the desktop screen
Forrest: What's up with these.
Jaime: He's harder to deal with than the Nihilists. And I got poisoned by one.
Mr. Mu: Ah, simply fragments of the computer's old life.
Steph: Does he not... trust us? Any of us?
...
Forrest: Written by people before us?
Steph: ...I guess that's fair.
Mr. Mu: I can only assume.
Steph: Him being from... American, and whatever.
Mr. Mu: It is a recent adition.
Forrest: Mm.
Steph sigh
Forrest: How recent. How many other kids had the chance to use it.
Mr. Mu: The set previous to you.
Forrest: .....The snake cult, right.
Jaime: ...We'll still manage.
Mr. Mu nods
Forrest: Which would probably mean they're all from them.
Forrest cycles through them
Steph: Yeah.
Forrest: ...They're all corrupted to shit.
Jaime: ...That check he showed me? Supposedly he's starting his own journal.
Mr. Mu: It is the state of this place.
Forrest: ...What's that mean.
Mr. Mu: The airs of this place cause decay.
Steph: Good for him. It'll probably be useful.
Mr. Mu: When it pulls away from the First Heaven, this process accelerates.
Steph: Should have just brought his own notebook...
Jaime: He's calling it...
Jaime pulls out the check
Jaime: ..."Magical Monster Tips".
Steph: Pfft...
Forrest: ...Don't suppose there's anyway to clean this up, is there.
Mr. Mu: I doubt it.
...
Jaime: Think it's gonna find a place in Hogwarts or something?
Mr. Mu: I do recall, if you wish to know, the Archetypes of my previous guests.
Forrest: ......
What about their names.
Mr. Mu: I never remember names.
I have seen too many faces.
Forrest: Great.....
Steph: 'Magical beasts and where to find them'... In a crappy metaphysical fuck
school, that's where.
Forrest: Do you think they still have their powers.
Mr. Mu: Oh, certainly.
Forrest: ...Alright.
Forrest boots up Word
Mr. Mu: You keep these abilities for life.
Forrest: Give me those Archetypes
Jaime: Heh. Good for him.
Mr. Mu: There were...
Steph: I don't know...
Mr. Mu: A Ruler...
Forrest writes the following down
Steph: What am I supposed to do?
Mr. Mu: A Jester...
A Hero...
A Creator...
A Sage..
Forrest: Ruler....Jester.....Hero....Hang on, can you give me a quick primer on
what each powers they get
Mr. Mu: An Outlaw...
And, finally, an Everyman.
Steph: I haven't asked my grandfather about them. I mean... I'm pretty sure it f
ucked him up too, right?
Fawkes M.: I got like five minutes tops
Mr. Mu: Rulers focus on control and domination of all things.
Forrest: Alright....
Steph: I don't want to reopen old wounds like that. But...
Jaime: ...About the crash?
Mr. Mu: Jesters focus on revelry and enjoyment.
Heroes seek to prove themselves through brave or difficult action.
Steph: Yeah. He lost his daughter, he lost his son-in-law... I'm pretty much his
only family left.
Me and the parrot.
Mr. Mu: The Creator wishes to create something of lasting value.
A Sage seeks the true nature of things.
An Outlaw desires revenge and revolution.
And an Everyman simply seeks connection with others and the world around them.
Jaime: If you think you have to ask, then you should.
A lead's a lead, right?
Steph: Yeah, but... this lead is my grandfather.
Forrest typity typity
Jaime: Stop me if I start to sound like Forrest, but...
...You said that Iblis looked like him, right?
Mr. Mu: Certain Archetypes...
Steph: Yeah.
Mr. Mu: Will do more harm against certain Archetypes.
Forrest: ...?
Like...what, rock-paper-scissors?
Mr. Mu: Outlaws can more easily harm Rulers, and vice versa.
Jaime: ...I don't know, maybe that's a connection.
Forrest: Give me each of them.
Steph: There's also...
...I dunno. It's selfish of me, I guess.
I want an out. Something... something connected to the real world. If... that ma
kes sense.
That's my grandfather. If I ask him, I'm just dragging him into this.
Mr. Mu: Hero and Cargeiver, Outlaw and Ruler, Jester and Sage, Creator and Every
man, Magician and Lover, Innocent and Explorer.
Jaime: Well... will asking him really entail telling him all about this?
Steph: Even if it's just... asking questions about my mother, I...
...
I don't know.
Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe I haven't been giving Grandpa enough credit this w
hole time.
Forrest typity tyyyypity
Jaime: What do you mean?
Steph: Maybe he's fine with me just... y'know. Just asking a few questions.
Mr. Mu watches him
Forrest SAVE
Forrest PRRRRRRINT
Jaime: Only one way to really find out.
Steph: Yeah.
Fawkes M.: Aggh, I've reached my limit
Mac D.: live
_liiiive_
Space: this was good fawkes, good nite
Fawkes M.: Night, Duff
Forrest: Alright.
Fawkes M.: Night, Space and Seer
Mr. Mu looks at the paper
Mr. Mu: make like a tree
Steph: ...
Mr. Mu: and go fuck yourself
Steph looks back at the printer noises
Fawkes M.: Aww yeh
Steph: ........
Forrest walks over and nabs the sheet
Steph: ...What do you have over there?
Steph gets up
Forrest: Helpful information.
Forrest hands off the sheet without looking at her
Steph looks at it
Forrest: Read this over and put it in your notebook.
Steph: ...Okay, I can add some stuff. We've already seen a few of them, so I thi
nk we can make some guesswork here.
Forrest: Go for it.
Steph: Officer Philip Quest is the Hero. He - he had a sword. Like Ken.
Forrest: Alright.
Be sure to write down the names you know, too.

Forrest is still not looking at her and has gone back to the computer
Space: i can't ediiiiiiit
Mr. Mu: in your own
Mac D.: seer fix this
Mr. Mu: notebook
Steph: There's not a lot of stuff.
Mac D.: noooo let him edit the MONSTER manuallll
Space: i already have their names in my own notebook
Mac D.: it is technically a part of her notebook after all
Steph: On the computer. I-- y'know, I went through it.
Forrest: Never hearts to double check.
*hurtsd
Steph: ...Yeah, I bet.
Narrator : Oh.
There's one interesting
"THE_END"
Forrest: I don't know what you meant by that, but I'm going to assume it was ins
ulting.
...?
Forrest opens it
Narrator : Wow.
This is just
really corrupted
but there's a word to be made out
Forrest: ....Figures.....
...?
Narrator : Iblis.
Forrest: ......Figures, again.
Steph: What figures?
Forrest turns the monitor towards her
Forrest: Did you look through this file.
Steph: What's it called?
Forrest: "THE_END"
Narrator : "[...] Iblis [...] It's done[...]Sorry, so [...]"
"-[...]P[...]"
it just gets
glitchier
as time goes on
Steph sets the sheet down once she's done, looking over his shoulder
Forrest: So did you look over this one.
Steph: You got me.
Forrest: I told you it never hurts.
Steph: Who names a file something like that?
Forrest: Someone with low prospects of survival.
Steph: The End...
Forrest: Alternatively, someone who knows something we don't.
Steph: P. Maybe we know who that is.
We really need to look through an old yearbook or something.
Forrest: Are you sure it's a name.
Narrator : professor smegma
Steph: The last one had initials, it looks like this one might too.
Forrest: It's hard to tell, this thing's a mess.
It could just be the start of another sentence.
Steph: Yeah. That's true.
Mr. Mu?
Mr. Mu: Yes?

Steph: Was this computer always this bad? Did they intentionally corrupt the fil
es?
Forrest: He said it's caused by decay in the air.
Mr. Mu nods
Mr. Mu: Nirvana did not become so rotten by my hand, or theirs.
Steph: Was it not originally like this?
Forrest: I'd assume not.
Mr. Mu: When it was new, it was much better.
Forrest: The way these are written makes me think they weren't sticking together
, and left the messages to relay to one another.
Mr. Mu: But the wear and tear of the Nihilists and River Cocytus have brought ro
t to this entire realm.
Steph: Yeah. That's what I think, too.
Steph looks back at Mu
Steph: How long has this been going on?
Mr. Mu: For a very long time.
Forrest: The only people who've had access to this computer was the group before
us.
Mr. Mu: I have waited.
Forrest: Ergo, all of these were written by the snake cult.
Steph: ...What a bunch of pretentious fucks. Honestly.
Forrest: Something we can agree on.
Mr. Mu: ...
Forrest: If I wanted to relay messages to separated group members, I wouldn't ja
zz it up with flowery prose.
Mr. Mu: Previously, one of them had stolen this.
Steph looks up
Mr. Mu: Well, it is not theft when they brought it here in the firt place.
Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks at him
Forrest: ....Did they bring it from one of the places they were exploring.
Mr. Mu: When the gap between the Heavens opened again, they took it with them.
I believe so.
Mr. Mu shrugs
Mr. Mu: I only recently re-aquired this.
Forrest: They might have messed with the messages, after all.
Mr. Mu: Evidently, whoever had taken it met with an ill-boding fate.
For...
Steph: ...
Mr. Mu: It was...
Iblis, who brought it back to the Second Heaven.
Forrest: ......
Weird.
Steph: ...Okay, I was going to, uh, say we should take it to some data recovery
place or something.
Mr. Mu: He threw it into Erebus, but a quickly retrieved it.
Steph: Just, uh... scratch that.
Mr. Mu: *I
Forrest: Explains why it's a busted piece of shit.
Steph: I don't know, but I think we've gotten pretty much all we can out of it a
t this point.
Mr. Mu: Iblis did not wish the information on this computer to survive.
Forrest: Considering the computer was taken from here, by them.
This opens up the possibility that the messages on it might not have been meant
for them at all.

They could be messages to the next generation.
Warnings, advice, taunting, whatever.
Steph: The one by SK seemed like it was meant for the other members of her -- so
rry, their group
Forrest: Let's give it another read.
Forrest opens dat shiet up
Narrator : i hate you
Mac D.: :3
Narrator : lt me find it
Forrest: ......
Space: (we should probs wrap this up soon btw)
Forrest waits for the piece of shit to load
Space: (just bcause my little cousin is trying to sleep in this room as well)
Steph: ...What's our next move after this?
Narrator : We, the Society for the [Fucked up] have [...] Through mutual will, a
nd [fucked up] [really fucked up] Iblis, and [fucked up] to the Second Heaven. [
fucked up] know that I will continue, with or without any of you. - S.K
Forrest: Go back out there and find that Tartarus place.
Steph: Not gonna call it a day yet?
Mr. Mu: It will take..
Forrest: Can we just fuck off back to normal spacetime on a whim.
Here, it's loaded now.
Mr. Mu: A considerable amount of time to get to Tartarus.
Steph: ...
Mr. Mu: And you cannot stay here perpetually.
Steph: 'Know that I will continue, with or without any of you.'
Forrest: Are we certain that the entirety of the previous group makes up the sna
ke cult.
Steph: If my mother wrote that, then no.
There's a lot that we don't know at this point.
Forrest: IF. Your mom wrote it.
Steph: There is a lot that we don't know at this point, Forrest.
Forrest: I would prefer to make educated guesses based on information provided,
thank you.
An uncertain gut feeling is not substantial evidence.
Steph: Okay, let's see.
Whoever this person is, I can't see the outcome being good for them.
Forrest: Very sound thinking, I'm impressed.
Steph: That's not necessary.
Mr. Mu: turns out
he really was
impresse
d
Forrest: I don't know what you're talking about.
Alright, so. When are we able to go back to regular Spacetime.
Mr. Mu: You may leave whenever you wish,
I will tell you when you must leave.
Forrest: Is it still going to be a horrible monster school when we get back in t
here.
Steph: Are we going to have to walk all the way back, or could you just drop us
off at the entrance?
Mr. Mu: I could drop you off.
Forrest: That'd be appreciated.
Space: mu is weird and creepy and i like him
Steph: Okay, so-Are you guys okay with calling it for today?
Forrest: I can still feel the poison in me.
Steph: Wow, really?

Mr. Mu taps him
Mr. Mu just takes the poison out
Forrest: .....Ohp, there it goes.
Alright, let's fuck off.
Forrest gets out the chair
Mr. Mu tips his hat to them
Space: this was a good session
Mac D.: sesh tommorrow yes?
Space: i like how more and more things get revealled each sesh
HOEP-fully
Mac D.: perhaps earlier as well
Space: seer play the ED for duff
Mac D.: cause holy shit
Space: is that a 'holy shit this is fun' or a 'hol shit im tire'
Mac D.: "holy shit it's 3 AM"
so yeah
Space: :^)
Mac D.: starting earlier would be nice
Space: :^) :^)
i'm having a lot of fun with this roll20
Mac D.: me2
Mr. Mu: thhat was just how things went
Space: i think that
having the full party is
super duper unwieldy
in combat
andn general traversing the dungeon
Mac D.: true dat
Space: since there's eight
would there be some way to just easily split them into two groups
and cover more ground that way
Mr. Mu: do what steph said
split up
Space: steph is smart
Mac D.: maybe find a way to forcibly split the party in two
like they end up in different spots
Space: but everyone else thinks theyre in fuckin scooby doo
Mac D.: but if they split up one group was certain to die
Mr. Mu: all the npcs go on their own party
Space: nah theyd be fine
Mr. Mu: and go on their own adventure
Space: yeah ez pz
it saves everone pain and anguish
Mac D.: yeah all the npcs could go in their own party and the players could peri
odically meet up with them
Space: yes
Mr. Mu: walkie talkies
Mac D.: and then inevitably fight and kill the
*them
Space: cellular phones
Mr. Mu: get walkie talkies
no reception in hell
Space: damn
so seer
what do you think about the party's progress in general
Mr. Mu: i have no opinion

Space: thats unfortunate
do you have any opinions you wish to express
Mr. Mu: not really
Space: not really...?
Mr. Mu: nothing at this moment
Space: i see
Mr. Mu: what do yo uthink about mr mu
Space: he's a helpful guy
Mac D.: very helpful robot
Space: thats weird
i've not thought of him as a robot
but it fits
minus the mechanical stuff
Mac D.: who knows, spaced
Space: though maybe hes just gears and shit under that mask
Mac D.: who really knows what's under the mask
Space: underneath his mask
is another mask
Mac D.: god i wanna play moooooore
Mr. Mu: that question has an answer
Space: saaaaaaaaaaame
i was gonna
have steph, at some point ask him
what would happen if he took it off
Mr. Mu: he'd give a glib non-answer
Mac D.: "it would be very painful"
Space: yeah i bet he would
Mr. Mu: I'd no longer be masked.
for you
Mac D.: steph: "well you're a big guy"
"for you"
Space: i like forrest and steph's passive aggressive dynamic
check out the notes she added
Mac D.: forrest has no time for sentimental nonsense when he just almost died
Space: steph has no time for forrest when she got very scared of death
Mac D.: forrest doesn't seem scared......wonder what's THAT about.....
Space: he's not afraid of death or dying
he's only scared of never trying
only god can judge him now
Mac D.: ye
did she write anything in her journal about him
Space: nyet
she dislikes him
but she trusts him
Mac D.: strikes him from history
Space: the next group will never know he existed
Mr. Mu: who do you think sk is
Space: theres only one sk that we know of so until further evidence is given
Mac D.: the sk stands for Red Herring
Space: fug
Mr. Mu: alucard backwards is SK
Space: listen, to the music of the night
Forrest: the fuck's up with these dishes
how come i was teleported ajar from everybody else
Steph: because you smell
Mr. Mu: it's a sotrage building
Steph: so what's up with that gross old school
does it
exist in the first heaven, like as the actual old part of the building
Mr. Mu: nope

well like
it's a transition
the building becomes less real the further you get in
Space: what's there when the second heaven isn't
Mr. Mu: like a disused part of the building
Space: a butchery
Mr. Mu: but it's not large
Space: well i need to sleep
goodnit
Mr. Mu: night
Mac D.: nitey nite
Ed Stuart: Winter's comin'
Space: fuckin piece of shit ed stuart
fucking piece of shit lung borg
Ed Stuart: why piece of shit
Space: ugly
Aaron Ljungborg: I'm the Mad Prom King.
Space: aegon lung borg
Aaron Ljungborg: aerys
i just wanted a hard to spell name
Space: tell me about them o'er steam
Ed Stuart: why
Space: i wanna do some gta to unwind
Ed Stuart: i'm going to stay here and listen to my music
Space: pls to open the steam
Fawkes M.: So what the heck is the Next Game feature?
It claims we are a month overdue
eldritch s. (GM): it's from when i set it so that i would remember when the next
game was supposed to be
Mobile L: Ah, that
Fawkes M.: So our plan is to time travel
Mobile L: Back 2 the future
Gabby: look i can play the pee-ano
Liszt: BUT WAIT
Gabby: oh frick what
Jaime: Peeing on Anno? You must really hate Eva, Gabby.
Liszt: WATCH ME PLAY MY SONG
Gabby: frick you, you know what i meant
oh heckle this guy is DANG GOOD
can't compete with someone like that
eldritch s. (GM): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Franz_Liszt
He was a benefactor to other composers, including Frederic Chopin, Richard Wagne
r, Hector Berlioz, Camille Saint-Sans, Edvard Grieg and Alexander Borodin.[4]
Gabby: that's quite the...
lizt of composers there
B)
Liszt: you have to play my songs now or die
Jaime: wow
that
i think i lost 30 hp, gabby
Gabby: nyehehehehe... frick i can barely play chopsticks
Jaime: isn't that a type of chinese food?
Gabby: you're a racialist
Jaime: nuh
Gabby: yeh
Mobile L: Behold my masterpiece
Jaime: frick you too
Gabby: frick this gay earth
Jaime: you know what we should do?
eldritch s. (GM): https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/0d/Franz_Lisz

t_by_Herman_Biow-_1843.png
Liszt: play along gabby, or i'll kill you
Gabby: what should we do, aside from bending to franz lizt's will
Jaime: open the gates of tartar sauce or whatever the fuck
and tell all the souls
frick off
heck
let's spraypaint the gates with "frick"
"off"
Gabby: yeahhhhhhh, heck those fricking frickers!!!! this is the best idea you've
had in years, jaime my old chum
Jaime: B)
Gabby: B)
Fawkes M.: I must do that Errand I mentioned now
Mobile L: Be safe, sane and consensual
eldritch s. (GM): i really like liszt
Mobile L: This is some pretty good shit
eldritch s. (GM): he's famous for making
some of the single hardest songs
ever
this song, the hungarian rhapsody, is infamous
Mobile L: Yeah, this sounds like it'd be a bitch to play
eldritch s. (GM): professionals have aching hands afterwards
Mobile L: Frick, yo
Fawkes M.: Back
Turns out we can't move our relative's car out of the driveway because the batte
ry is dead
Mobile L: Awww shit
eldritch s. (GM): you need to physically move it
with your own hands
Mobile L: Can I just say that I am enamored with Gabby's faceclaim?
eldritch s. (GM): she's pretty cool
Mobile L: It's prolly the most expressive character design I've seen, like, ever
eldritch s. (GM): are you ready for freddy fox
Mobile L: I AM FIVE NIGHTS AT REDDY
Fawkes M.: I'm not just ready
Fawkes M. puts sunscreen on nose
Fawkes M.: I'm ready Freddy
Mobile L: It's, uh... It's Larry.
Mac D.: it's been so long
Ed Stuart: Winter's comin'.
Forrest: since i put on the mask
Jaime: :-\
Forrest: what are you looking at, hair gel
Jaime: him
Johann Lancaster: Will you get the fuck off of my property, Stuart.
Jaime: thanks, dad
Ed Stuart: THE NORTH REMEMBERS
Forrest: i think i've seen this on a TV show once
i think it was called
Jaime: you're just imagining things
Forrest: The Hobbit
Jaime: nah
it's the brady bunch
Narrator : Game of Hobbits/
Forrest: ah, yes...
Mac D.: OH I'M EXCITE
Mobile L: git reddy motherfrickers
Narrator : man when will space stop getting off at the idea of charlemagne and a
rturia hooking u- oh there he is
Fawkes M.: Yeah, Space
You lewd panda
Narrator : naughty panda
Space: winter's comin', seer
Narrator : you're going to get some coal in your stocking
and so am i
Fawkes M.: Why are your hands out of the frame, panda
Mobile L: Oh Boa by Duvet, how I missed you
Space: :^)
Mobile L: I AM FALLING, I AM FADING, I HAVE LOST IT ALL
Steph does cool OP stuff
Gabby studies INTENSELY and has her glasses gleam sinisterly
Jaime wonders how the heck this song translates into a dynamic OP
Narrator : https://youtu.be/PKZ0VNnAuiU?t=231
lain did it
Forrest is reading through papers on his desk in the dark
Steph writes in her notebook, sitting against the wall in the abandoned school
Mac D.: so when's forrest get his magnifying glass
Narrator : oh he can summon it whenever
Mac D.: ....oh
Mobile L: Boy is it a bad sign when your feet are popsicles and you already have
socks on
Mac D.: mobile are you fucking dying
Steph: put on Double Socks
Mobile L: My room is badly ventilated
Jaime is just leaning against the wall, idly
Mobile L: It's much less frigid out here in the living room
Mac D.: "i'm just......too cool"
Mobile L: B) B) B)
Narrator : The party was dispensed by Mu's door.
Forrest: .......Well.
Steph: ...
Forrest: Back to the hunt, I guess.
Gabby: Yyyyyyep.
Gabby just sounds tiny-cranky
Jaime: How much longer do you think we have?
Forrest: Don't ask me, this is my first time.
Narrator : virgin
Steph: ...God...
Narrator : i'm here
Jaime looks over at Steph
Jaime: What is it?
Steph: Let's just keep going...
Mobile L: Steph: "God..."
Mobile L: Jaime: "YES, WHAT DO YOU REQUIRE, MY CHILD?"
Mac D.: jaime: REJOIC
Jaime: boku wa kira janai
Fawkes M.: Wait, so
This isn't Mu's room, is it?

Forrest: Is something wrong.
Gabby: GOD! I DID EVERYTHING YOU TOLD ME!
Space: no the party got dropped off here so they wouldn't have to walk all the w
ay back
Narrator : yes
Forrest: .....I mean, putting aside everything that is clearly wrong with what i
s happening right now.
Narrator : no it isn't his room
this is his room
Jaime: ahh
been a while
Let's just head out.
Gabby: 'Kay... Mrgh.
Steph is just the first one out
Forrest: .....Alright, whatever.
Teddy Reinside: 'M feeling pretty good about this!
Jaime following along quickly
Nathan: ... Superpowers...
Gabby: Yyyyyyep.
Forrest: Please try not to pass out on us again.
Narrator : They're all still frozen.
Teddy Reinside: Hey!
That was one time.
I'm uh, hypoglucemic.
Steph: Okay, guys, where do we go from here?
Mac D.: i still refuse to believe that foxhole is a dude
Forrest: You seem to be keen on leading the way, so you decide.
Jaime: Where else haven't we looked?
Forrest: I don't really know the layout of the building, anyway.
Gabby: ...I'unno, is there a roof access?
Steph: ...Hold on a second, uh...
Gabby: ?
Steph: Now's a good time for this. Do any of you know where the school keeps, li
ke... their old attendance records?
Jaime: Hmm...
Forrest: I would assume they'd keep them in a designated archiving room.
Jaime: Maybe where the office usually is?
Forrest: Or somewhere in the administrative office, yes.
Gabby: ...Yeah, probably there.
Steph: Okay, let's hurry before time starts back up again.
Forrest: Why do you need attendance records.
Jaime: Think for once.
Forrest: Yes, I am thinking about it. That is why I am asking the question.
Steph: All of the people in the last group went here, okay? We don't need any ar
guments, so both of you drop it.
Fawkes M.: Not even trying for the spot check
Gabby:
Gabby cranky silence
Forrest: ...Ah. I understand. Good idea.
Steph: Okay, c'mon.
Jaime: ...
Jaime follows Steph's lead
Gabby: ...Yeah. Frickin'... Might be the best lead we've had yet.
Forrest follows
Space: oh
Forrest: We could also look for yearbooks to find the faces that go with the nam
es.
Iblis: Stop for a moment.
Forrest: ......
Gabby: Yeah, tha...!!!
Steph looks back
Steph: --!!!
Gabby oh. FRICK
Steph: Run!
Iblis: Don't.
Forrest is just standing there, Iblis right behind him
Forrest: ........
Steph just fucking tries to abscond via the door
Iblis: No.
Jaime: Are you stupid?!?
Steph: --!?!
Forrest just has this annoyed expression on his face
Steph: W-what-?!
Mac D.: ah good
Gabby ahahaha, NOPE ON OUTTA THERE
Mac D.: the constant connection interruption i missed you
Gabby HECK NOPE
Jaime: Steph, let's just leave, alright? Forget the door!
Mobile L: :c
Steph: Oh, god...
Forrest looks at Iblis
Iblis: Talk.
That is what I wanted.
Talk.
Forrest: ..........
Talk.
Gabby ...heck. NOT.
Gabby violent clamming up
Iblis: You refused.
Forrest: Is Talk going to lead to Kill.
Steph hesitates, more out of fear than anything else
Jaime: .......
Iblis: You have already done that.
Forrest: Okay, yeah, but still.
Gabby frick you. frick this. frick everything.
Iblis: I will leave.
This is the final warning.
Forrest: ....A warning for what.
Gabby you'd fricking better... WEINER HOLE...
Jaime is just REALLY FUCKING EXASPERATED right now
Iblis: If you see me again, your heart will be opened to the sky.
Gabby OH SAME
Steph: ...
Iblis walks off
Forrest: ...I don't know what that means.
Wait what does that even mean.
Jaime would bang his head against the table were it not for the-- oh
Steph: (what the fuck does that mean holy jesus christ almighty)
.......
Gabby: ...WHAT.
Forrest: ...Okay I guess we don't get to know what that means.
......
Jaime: ...Are you stupid?!?!
Forrest: Do you know what it means.
Narrator : roll mind to determine what that means
Steph: Fuckin'...
Gabby: Frrrrrricking... Frick that... that fricking... FRICK. GOD DANG...!
Teddy Reinside is hiding beneath a table
{(
2
+
13
+
7
)}
= 7
{(
17
+
17
+
10
)}+-1
= 16
Gabby upset dirt-kicking
Space: james braniac
(
6
+
16
+
7
)+1
= 30
Narrator : He means he's going to tear your chest open, revealing your heart to
the air.
Jaime: Do you even know who that was?
Gabby too ticked to give a frick
Ken fell onto the bench

Forrest: Judging by the way everyone was panicking, I'd say it was that thing Mr
. Mu said would kill us.
Steph: ...That was, that was enough for today, right? Can we just go?
Suzie is underneath the table too
Jaime: Yes. And he was threatening to kill you with that thing about the heart.
Nathan: HEY!
Jaime: All of us.
Forrest: Oh.
Nathan: COME BACK HERE!
Gabby doesn't even notice anyone else, that is how DANG TICKED she is
Steph looks over at Nathan
Nathan: C'MERE YOU JERK!
Steph: ...
Forrest: That was a wierdly flowery way of saying "I'm going to kill you."
Jaime: ...
Nathan is about to let off a loud shout
Steph: Fucking damn it, you guys...
Gabby: Ghhhh! Ghhhhhhh! Ghhhhhhhhh! Ghhhhhhhh...!
Steph: Stop! Nathan!
Shut up!
Holy Christ! Just stop talking!
Gabby anger_issues.png
Nathan: roll to stop i
Steph: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Finesse
{(
12
+
13
+
9
)}+1
= 13
Nathan is shoved off the table he was standing on
Steph: For fuck's sake...
Forrest watches Nathan fall like a chump
Nathan: Oof.
Jaime: ...Guys.
Steph: What?
Jaime: You know what Mu said about Iblis, right? How he gets drawn to us the mor
e we use our powers?
Gabby eventually tires herself out with dirt-kicking and stops to get her breath
Gabby:
Forrest: Are you suggesting we ease off on their use for the time being.
Steph: That's fine. That should just be a thing from now on.
Jaime: Not just ease off, don't use them at all unless we really, really have to
.
That's rule number one.
Forrest: Okay, I can get behind that.
Jaime: Are you sure?
Forrest: I'm not as adept as stick-fighting as you are, though, if that isn't re
adily apparent. So don't expect me to be of much help without them.
Gabby: ...'Kay... 'Kay, yeah, I could... I could tap the... the breaks...
Forrest: I might be able to use a gun. Anybody got a gun.
Steph: ...Okay, are we staying here or are we going?
Steph does not answer Forrest
Gabby huffs and wipes her eyes
Narrator : As if by magic, which it is, the world unfreezes.
Forrest: ............
Forrest looks around
Gabby: ...Nope... Nobody has guns...
Steph: ...
Forrest: ......Well, fuck, what do you know.
Jaime: ...
Forrest: Is the magic word "Gun."
Mr. Hawthorne: -Yes, well, let me just get my drink!
Jaime exhales just a little
Steph: Holy shit, stop talking about that at school.
Gabby: ...No. It was coincidence.
Forrest: Talking about what.
Mr. Hawthorne turns around, bumping into Teddy
Gabby keeps wiping her eyes
Forrest: Guns?
Mr. Hawthorne: Oh!
Steph: What do you think?
Yes.
Jaime: ...why are we even...
Mr. Hawthorne: Wh- Who said the G-word?
Gabby bites her lip and sniffles a bit
Forrest: .....Oh, yeah, I forgot. Canada.
Nurse Foxhole: What's the G-word, boss? G-spot?
Steph: It's nothing, Mr. Hawthorne! Forrest is just American.
Mac D.: foxhole STOP IT
Mr. Hawthorne: WHAT!?
Gabby defeatedly trudges to the bench, thoroughly just done with... with stuff..
.
Mr. Hawthorne turns to look at Foxhole
Jaime: Yeah! Texan, right?
Mr. Hawthorne: Stop talking.
Jaime: ...
Forrest: New Jersey.
Mr. Hawthorne: Close your mouth.
Steph mentally thanks Foxhole for the save
Jaime: Close enough.
Steph: They're, like, right next to each other.
Nurse Foxhole shrugs
Forrest: They're really, really not.
Nurse Foxhole walks off
Jaime shrugs
Forrest: ....School's out, right.
Mr. Hawthorne: Anyhow, err...
Yes, yes it is!
Steph: I'm kind of hungry.
Forrest: Alright, then. Time to go home.
Gabby removes her glasses and wipes them on her sweater-vest
Mr. Hawthorne: Wait, Forrest!
Forrest: See you guys tomorrow.
....?
Forrest looks at Hawthorne
Jaime turns to Steph
Jaime: You want to get something to eat?
Mr. Hawthorne: How have you enjoyed your first day in Canada?
Forrest: .....
...Well, sir, it was nothing like I expected.
Steph: Sure! But I'm all out of cash.
Ken just sits on the bench beside Gaby
Jaime: Oh, um...
Mr. Hawthorne: I hope you find it to your liking.
Gabby is stuck in that strange domain between furious and despondent
Jaime: ...I think I can pay.
Mr. Hawthorne: It can take some getting used-to.
But take heart. my boy!
Steph: Great, let's go!
Mr. Hawthorne: With Stephen Harper in charge, it will be just like America in no
time.
Forrest: I will, sir. Don't you worry.
Nurse Foxhole: You're not allowed to do that, boss.
Jaime nods, and leads the way
Ken: ... Are you alright, Gabby.
Teddy Reinside: ...
Forrest: ....Can I go home, now.
Teddy Reinside looks down at his hospital gown
Teddy Reinside: ...
Steph follows the Jaime
Teddy Reinside: I'll, uh, see you tomorrow.
Gabby: ...Y-yeah... M'fine...
Teddy Reinside bolts
Fawkes M.: bare ass
Mobile L: gross
Mr. Hawthorne: ...
Fawkes M.: ishmael
Space: unf
Fawkes M.: What should Jaime do re: the search for cuisine?
Mr. Hawthorne: Yes, of course.
Forrest: Thanks.
Forrest STARTS FOR HOME
Narrator : where would jaime talk his HOUGHT DATE
Mobile L: Take her to Ted Horton's or wherever the donit place is

Narrator : tim horton's
ted horton's
you
you fucking
you piece shit
Forrest: fucking hell why was this school built on an island
Narrator : you piece of fucking shit
Forrest: -swim swim swimSpace: olive garden
Narrator : it's on the coast
Mobile L: Dan Fuckface's
Narrator : you go to the sides to leave
Jaime: Where do you feel like eating?
Mac D.: weak
pathetic
Narrator : actually
i like the idea
Mac D.: white
white guilt
Narrator : it being a little off shore
Mac D.: milquetoast
Fawkes M.: The Blind Side
Steph: Anywhere is fine with me.
Narrator : and there's like a road connecting it to the rest of town
Forrest HOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOME
Narrator : piece of human garbage
Space: its like the school in persona 3
Narrator : shut up
shut the fuck up
Space: this is a positive thing
Narrator : Forrest walks.
And walks.
And walks.
And walks.
Wand alks.
And walks.
Narrator : And walks.
He stops.
And then walks.
And walks.
And walks.
He stops again.
Forrest: fucking crosswalks
Narrator : Does he take the bus, get picked up, or take the skytrain.
Mac D.: bus
Jaime: Hmm... what about that one donut place?
Gabby GET... COMPOSURE...
Ken: ...
Steph: That's an interesting, uh... sure!
Ken checks his watch
Ken: I'll see you tomorrow.
Gabby: ...Okay... Uh... Take care, Ken...
Ken: You too.
Ken stands up and walks off
Jaime: ...Actually--
Jaime checks his watch

Gabby:
Narrator : Forrest gets on the bus.
The bus driver turns to him
Gabby has herself a barely-restrained kid cry
Steph: ...?
Fawkes M.: The Second Heaven would fuck up his watch, right?
Narrator : no
time doesn;t go
Forrest looks up at the driver
Forrest fat grumpy young man sopping wet from rain
Richard Moneypenny: Hey there.
You're new in town.
Space: holy shit
Richard Moneypenny: I can tell.
Space: it's richard moneypenny
Richard Moneypenny begins driving the bus
Forrest: ...Good guess.
Forrest has a seat
Richard Moneypenny: Name's Dick.
Dick Moneypenny.
Forrest: I won't make jokes.
Richard Moneypenny: Heh.
Space: richard moneypenny is just
the seediest fucker
Jaime: ...Do you want dinner? Sorry, just wondering.
Space: in this or any world
Gabby sniffle... huff... sniffle...
Steph: Oh, of course!
Richard Moneypenny: Not many people use my bus.
Forrest: Why, bad service.
Richard Moneypenny: Probably because of the train.
Or it's number 666.
Jaime: Alright.
Richard Moneypenny: Or because of Uber.
Jaime just decides to leave it to luck to see what he finds first
Forrest: Competition's a bitch, huh.
Gabby ...huff... whimper... sniffle...
Jaime: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 0 for Spirit
{(
18
+
20
+
11
)}+0
= 18
Narrator : Luck takess him to a nice Irish resteraunt.
Lilly: ...
Hey, Gabby.
Mac D.: POTATOES
Gabby: ?
Richard Moneypenny: Sure is.
Steph: Oh!
Richard Moneypenny has a broken handcuff on one of his hands
Gabby screams a bit internally when she sees she was noticed
Forrest: .....
Jaime: You want to eat here?
Forrest: ....I never really liked trains, myself.
Steph: Yeah, it looks nice!
Forrest: Too clean.
Richard Moneypenny: Heh, I call them the Loser Cruisers.
Forrest: That's not bad.
Jaime: Alright, let's go.
Forrest looks out the window
Lilly: I'd just like to ask what's bothering you... you seem upset...
Steph follows with eagerness at a free dinner
Jaime internally praying this won't hurt his father's wallet too much as he open
s the door for Steph
Narrator : They walk into the resteraunt.
There's a guy standing there, waiting fro them.
Gabby: ...'S frickin'... I dunno how to explain...
Narrator : He has rapist eyebrows, a white beard.
White hair.
A turtleneck.
Mac D.: HAWTHORNE
Narrator : He looks like a douche.
Mobile L: could it be
Narrator : Like really unpleasant.
Mobile L: COULD IT BE
Jaime: ...
Space: ...!!!
Mobile L: : D
Wallace: ... Welcome, to Sisty's Seventeen.
Space: oh
my
god
Mac D.: BREEEEEEEEEEEEN
Mobile L: :D :D :D :D :D
marry me
Forrest: .....
Steph: Oh -- Jaime, look, do you think we should have gotten a reservation?
They have a valet and everything...
Gabby looks to see her friends and also the Texan are gone already
Richard Moneypenny: ...
Forrest is keeping an eye out for his stop
Richard Moneypenny starts smoking
Richard Moneypenny: Trust me, kid.
Gabby: ...D'you, um... D'you got awhile...?
Jaime: ...Um...
How long's the wait?
Richard Moneypenny: If you got some brains, this town isn't just a dump, it's a
profitable dump.
Like a landfill.
Lilly: Sure, Gabby.
Forrest: I'll be sure to keep that in mind.
Lilly sits down
Gabby: ...Thanks... Uhh... So...
Narrator : Wallace sighs, making a big deal of checking the ledger
Forrest: Maybe I'll start driving a bus myself
Wallace: ... It appears we have a vacancy. Just your luck, we're quite full toda
y.
Narrator : The resteraunt is empty.
Steph: ...Um... great!
Jaime: ...Thanks.
Mobile L: oh wallace
Richard Moneypenny: I don't just drive a bus.
I'm also a resterauntuer.
I'm mayor.
Forrest: That so.
Gabby squints as she tries to figure out how to word this... Steph would always
do such a good job of it...
Richard Moneypenny: Oh yeah.
Forrest is clearly not buying it
Forrest: So what's the mayor doing driving a bus.
Wallace: Follow me.
Narrator : He leads them to a booth
Gabby: ...This, um... You may not, uhh... It's gonna be... hard to believe, at f
irst...
Steph follows, not sure how she should feel about this restaurant
Lilly: Trust me, I can believe anything!
Richard Moneypenny: Hard times.
Jaime also follows, wondering if they've stumbled upon some mafia hideout
Forrest: Wow, even for the fucking mayor.
Space: wallace is really in with the mob
Richard Moneypenny: Since the Indians burned down town hall and half of B.C, you
'd be surprised, kid.
Forrest: The economy's gotta be in one hell of a spot.
Space: it a money laundering scheme
Forrest: God damn, that's a shame.
It isn't nearly that bad back in America.
Wallace: I'll be back with your menus in a moment... -sighs-. Would you like any
thing to drink...?
Richard Moneypenny: I'd believe.
*believe it
Jaime: Just water.
Forrest: Here's to the American Dream. We at my stop, yet?
Gabby: ...Alright, well... There is... There's some fricked up crap happening at
this school... Me and, uh... Steph, and Jaime were the first to discover it, bu
t, like...
Steph: Um, can I have a water, please?

Richard Moneypenny: ... Where is your stop, kid?
Forrest: Iiiiit's.......
Lilly nods
Forrest: Right here.
Richard Moneypenny slams the breaks

Richard Moneypenny: This one's on the house.
I like you, kid. And no the pedophile way.
Forrest: ....Thanks.
Good luck making Canada great again.
Forrest steps out of the bus
Richard Moneypenny drives off
Forrest watches the bus go
Forrest: ........
.....I cannot believe I did not die on that bus.
Forrest continues his journey home
Wallace: Of course...
Narrator : He mutters to himself as he walks away
Wallace: I have a masters, a PH.D, and here I am, serving drinks to teenagers...
Steph: ...Wow, what a guy, huh?
Mac D.: forrest's heroic march to home
Narrator : The bagpipes start up on the speakers.
Jaime: Mm, he could be worse.
Narrator : Forrest walks to his new haus.
Mac D.: all the irishmen go "FUCK OFF"
Narrator : He's home.
The one
one
Fawkes M.: Wait, where are the speakers?
Narrator : irish guy at the reseraunt
Forrest looks up at HOME
Narrator : in the resteraunt
He stands up, disgusted.
Forrest: ......
Narrator : And leaves without paying his bill.
Steph: ...Pfft!
Gabby: ...Like, frickin'... There's these monsters, and... and they come out, and
the school gets... all weird, and... and...
Steph: Jaime, do you hear that?
Jaime: ...Heh, I do. Are they serious?
Steph: Holy shit!
Forrest exhales and enters HOME
Steph: All these fake restaurants in this town...
Mobile L: Wallace is probably hitting his special flask to get through this one
Narrator : You can totally see Wallace doing that.
Like you can fucking
See him.
Mobile L: An Irish hero
Steph: ...I, uh... wonder whaat they've got on the menu?
Jaime: Hmm...
Mobile L: A Canadian hero, too
Jaime looks down at the menu
Lilly: ...
Lel Shitkid opens the door for Forrest
Lel Shitkid: Hiiiii!
Space: it's li'l soozie
Forrest looks down at her

Forrest: Hey there, Sooz.
Gabby: ...Naomi, she was... Wewe went in to investigate, and she... she was there
, and she... We didn't... We didn't see until it was too late, and...
Forrest: Mom and Dad home, yet?
Steph also takes that looksee
Gabby is just about as run-down and emotionally-vulnerable as she's ever been
Lel Shitkid: Noooooo.
Space: li'l soozie: 'in this world, it's kill or be killed'
Lel Shitkid: It's raining!
Forrest holds up his dripping arms
Forrest: How'd you guess....
Lilly just listens
Forrest: I'm going to go find a towel, and then I'll fix you a snack.
Narrator : Wallace returns with a menu.
Two menus.
He just throws them down.
Mac D.: i can feel seer jut
Jaime: ...
Steph ohp
Mac D.: choke
every time he has to write dialogue for the adorable little girl
Steph peers at them
Jaime now he does the looksee
Narrator : He turns and walks away.
Oh, the food seems authentic.
Breadbowls.
Stew.
Lamb.
Beef.
Fawkes M.: So I just FP-rolled a Medusa and Alexander in the same 10-roll
Space: holy SHit
Fawkes M.: I KNOW RIGHT
Gabby: ...Ffffffrickin'... Andand then, we... Time would freeze, and it wouldn't
stop, and we... we met this man... This weird man, and we got, um... powers... A
nd there were... There's these fricking grown men who're... they wanna stop us f
rom doing the stuff, and we can'twe're fricking chained to it, now, whatwhat choic
e do we have?!
Narrator : The haggis has been crossed out with marker, passive-aggresively has
been written "More than a few kilometers off."
Gabby shaky exhale
Mobile L: wow wallace
Steph: ..Mmm... hey, what happens if we ask for the haggis?
Lilly: ...
Mobile L: Wallace shoots himself in the bathroom
Jaime: Do you want to try?
Lel Shitkid: Okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay.
Lel Shitkid walks into the house, dragging her little security blanket with her
Forrest walks in and gets a towel from a laundry room, then as he dries, heads i
nto the kitchen and fixes some APPLES AND PEANUT BUTTER OH FUCK YEAH
Mobile L: forrest is good big bro
Lel Shitkid was waiting at the table and begins eating that SAMMICH. PRISONER 66
6, YOU'RE A DANGEROUS NUN
Steph: Definitely!
Mobile L: you're going to kill Wallace
Lilly: ...
Jaime: Heh...
Jaime tries to hail Wallace
Forrest sits at the chair, drying himself off with the towel
Narrator : Wallace walks over with their waters.
Forrest: So, what'd you do today.
Wallace: What is it... you'll be having?
Steph: I'm gonna have the haggis!
Narrator : Wallace places the waters down
Jaime: Yeah, I'll have the haggis too.
Wallace: ... Ah.
Narrator : He squints.
Wallace: I am sad to inform you that the haggis has been crossed off the menu. I
know this may be a stretch to the imagination, but this means it is no longer a
n option.
Gabby: ...Anyway... There... O-other, uh... others found out, now Nathan and...
and this guy Teddy and the Texan are in with us, and they... they got their powe
rs...
Jaime: Have you run out?
Lel Shitkid: I read a book!
Steph: Can't you just print new menus or something?
Space: steph and jaime are horrible people and it's amazing
Forrest: Book, huh? Which one?
Mobile L: Abandoning a child, abusing an elderly man, being xenophobic to a well
-intentioned foreigner
Fawkes M.: They're actually at a shooting range with Wallace-shaped targets
Lilly: ...
Gabby: ...And, like, we... we learned that if we frickin' use the powers, this c
reep guy who's also a monster will come and... and take our hearts out like in In
diana Jones or some crap, and I fricking... I fricking do not know what to do, I
don't...!
Lel Shitkid: Everybody Poops!
Lel Shitkid claps
Mac D.: shitkid is a super genius who reads college-grade books at the age of fo
ur
Mobile L: Best Shitkid
Fawkes M.: Earning a degree in actual shit
Wallace: ...
Forrest: Good read. I remember reading that at your age.
Wallace: We do not serve it anymore.
Mobile L: aww, forrest
Wallace: And if you do not know why we cannot simply, as you say, print more men
us. Please, observe today's business, realize then the cost of simply printing m
ore f- ahem. Printing more menus.
Lilly has gone play
Lilly: *pale
Steph: Okay, so what's your recommendation? What's the best thing on the menu?
Lel Shitkid: Was it your favorite?
Jaime: Do you have anything that isn't on the menu?
Forrest: When I was little, for sure.

Lel Shitkid: What's your favorite now?
Mobile L: Wallace just barely holding it together
These two are the real shitkids
Forrest: Got a kick out of it every time it said "poop."
Space: theyre gonna give them a heart attack
Narrator : Wallace looks at Jaime
There's a long pause.
Wallace: No.
Gabby: ...Fffffffrick... so... so fricked up...
So... fricked up...
Gabby is crying again
Wallace: I recommend the Emerald Isle Stew.
Steph: I'll have that!
Lilly rests her hand on Gabby
Lilly: ...
Forrest: There's this book I swear by by this guy named Ryan Holiday. I'll tell
you about it when your older.
Jaime just looks down at the menu, to see what's in the Emerald Isle Stew
Lel Shitkid: Holiday?
Forrest: Yeah, like Christmas.
Narrator : Most pricey thing on the menu.
Forrest: It's not a book about Christmas, though.
Gabby: ...'M sorry... II shouldn'tve... I shouldn'tve s-said all that... frickin'
...
Narrator : And it has like lamb and shit
And it's in a breadbowl.
Jaime son of a - you can work with this, Jaime
Forrest: Gotta say though, not many of the grown-up books carry the simplistic c
harm of something like Everybody Poops.
Jaime scans the menu for something that looks palatable and only moderately pric
ed
Lel Shitkid: Everybody poops.
It's not my favorite, either.
Lilly: ... It's fine.
Narrator : Ah, lambchops.
And some halibut.
As in
Gabby sniffles and takes her glasses off again, wiping them on her vest for the
eight-millionth time
Narrator : those are moderately priced
not that they are served together
Forrest: That's an important life lesson.
What's your favorite, then?
Jaime: I'll have the lambchops.
Narrator : Wallace nods, takes their menus, and heads to the kitchen
Gabby: ...I don't... I don't even know why... Why 'm letting this bother me now.
.. I... I was doing pretty frickin' great... I was... h-handling it and... and b
eing brave...
...I think...
Steph: ...Oh, my gosh...
Lel Shitkid: It's the dictionary!
Steph snickers
Gabby: ...I think I even... I even thought I was ready to die...

Steph: We're horrible!
That poor guy...
Forrest: Wow, really?
Lel Shitkid: Yeah!
Lilly: ...
Gabby: I mean... I mean what's... how the heck is having a creep-guy tear your he
art out... a-any worse than being... killed by a monster... or shot by a conspir
acy fricker...?
Jaime: You think we're gonna give him a heart attack or anything?
Forrest: Man, when I was your age, I was terrified of the dictionary.
Steph: Oh, gosh, that'd be awful!
Lilly: ...
Steph is smiling
Forrest: You're already way more mature than I was.
Jaime smirks back
Narrator : Wallace eventually returns with their food.
Gabby takes another uncomfortable moment to breathe
Jaime: Wonder if they have a dessert menu...
Narrator : He just silently walks away.
Jaime looks down at the food
Narrator : It looks good.
Roll mind, Jaime.
Steph: Oh!
{(
19
+
17
+
8
)}+-1
= 16
Narrator : The lamb is undercooked.
Steph starts to eat the delicious dinner...
Narrator : And it's clearly deblirately done, just from how undercooked.
Jaime: ...
Narrator : Steph enjoys some delicious stew.
Delicious.
Delicious.
Jaime takes a small bite to see if it's palatable like rare steak
Narrator : Stew.
Mobile L: Don't fuck with the Universal Union
Narrator : Just barely, Jaime.
The lamb in the stew is
It's
Mac D.: it just occured to me that the small child has been alone in the house f
or who knows how long
Narrator : Fucking
Still frozen
Steph: Thanks again, Jaime. This is really, uh...
...
Oh, my god!
Steph cracks up
Space: latchkey kid
Jaime: Hey, what's so funny?
Lel Shitkid: I like all the words!
Gabby: ...I think... I think it's that I... I made friends...
Lilly: ...
Gabby: ...I think it's that.
Forrest: Just remember not to use the one's you're not allowed to say.
.....Well, in front of grown-ups, anyway...
Space: Try this!
Steph: no me
Steph slides it over
Gabby: 'S... 's one frickin' thing if I die, and... all of them, I gotta... I go
tta worry about them...
Jaime takes an unused u-tensil and consumed a bit of stew
Gabby is just... in a very low place, emotionally
Forrest scoots out of his chair and stands up
Forrest: Alright, I'm heading up to my room. Come hang out with me until mom and
dad get home.
Lilly can't say anything
Narrator : Wallace celebrates his victory
He's pumping his arms in the kitchen.
Gabby realizes this and feels even worse
Narrator : Majestically.
Like a soaring eagle.
Like he is giving a speech to a crowd of adoring subjects.
Jaime: Just like my lamb, actually.
Steph: Frozen?
Mobile L: High-fiving the head chef and having another swig from the special fla
sk
Narrator : He offers the head chef a high give.
Jaime: Well, mine's almost pretty raw!
Steph: Hahaha!
C'mon, let's get out of here.
Narrator : The head chef is a woman, red haired, middle aged.
Mobile L: Ahahahahaha
Narrator : She just shakes her had.
*head
Mobile L: friendzoned by judith..........
Jaime: Like that one Irishman?
Lel Shitkid: Can do!
Forrest: Alrighty then...
Steph: Like who?
Forrest cleans the table and heads UPSTAIRS
Steph gets up, fully intending to dine and dash
Lilly: I...
...
Forrest gets out the game console and cycles through the games
(
9
)
= 9
Gabby: ...'M sorry, Lilly... 'M so... so sorry...
Narrator : Wallace was not enthused enough in his victory.
Jaime: Earlier when they played that song on the speaker?
Narrator : He seems them.
Steph: Oh, shit, yeah!
Jaime also gets up
Wallace: COLOMBO, STOP THEM!!!!
Mobile L: oh god
Forrest Backstreet Brawler 3.....to mechanically complex.....Sword of the Machin
a....ah, kids aren't into JRPGS....Jiggle Quest 5.....not in front of the youth
Narrator : Colombo, the big, scary guy with a billy club, walks out fom the bac
room.
Steph: ,,,
Holy shit.
Jaime: ...
Mobile L: OPPAI
Steph: Let's get going!
Steph RUN
Forrest AH, here we go. Nipples The Enchillada, a child-favorite
Jaime: We were just going to use the rest-- oh, forget it!
Jaime RUN
Lilly: ... Don't be.
Narrator : Colombo chases after them, along with Wallace.
Forrest: Wanna play some Nip, Sooz?
Narrator : The smiling face of nipples stares up at Forrest
Space: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Finesse
{(
8
+
16
+
1
)}+1
= 9
oh...
Jaime: How do we lose 'em?
rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Finesse
{(
4
+
12
+
10
)}+1
= 11
Lel Shitkid: I love nipples!
Mobile L: knock knock it's nipples
Lel Shitkid: *Nipples
it's a proper noun, you know
Forrest: It sure is.
Narrator : Colombo just grabs Steph by the scruff of the neck
Forrest plugs that shit in and hands Shitkid the controller
Steph: Gck-!
Narrator : While Breen huffs and puffs after Jaime.
Gabby: ...I... I kinda spilled that... a-all over your lap, didn't I...?
Forrest: I've gotta do some work, so try not to be too loud, okay?
Narrator : And loses him, because he's old.
Steph: Let me go!
Jaime: Dammit...
Wallace: I'm only... sixty...
Jaime turns around
Colombo: I don't think so.
Jaime and STARTS BACK THAT WAY
Steph struggles to escape the frightening man's grasp
Mobile L: Breen is literally gonna have a heart attack
{(
5
+
10
+
8
)}+1
= 9
Space: it's up to jaime
Mac D.: save the fair maiden, you knight in shining douchebag
Mobile L: Jaime: The One Free Man, the Opener of the Way
Jaime: Hey, waiter!
Lel Shitkid plays Nipples the Enchilada, loving the shit out of it
Space: https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=4jubP3t27IQ
Lel Shitkid: :D
Forrest sits at his computer and starts doing some research into LOCAL FUCKING L
IBRARIES
Wallace: What!?
Narrator : Colombo holds on, iron-tight.
Jaime keeps looking at Wallace, reaching into his pocket, pulling something out.
..
Lilly: It's fine.
Steph: C
Narrator : Ah, yes, there are some.
Steph: *C'mon! I don't even have any money!
Jaime it is...
Jaime: I do.
Jaime his wallet
Narrator : A few fine libraries.
Wallace: ... Oh.
Forrest beep boops their addresses into his phone
Steph: ...!
Narrator : He has the addresses
Fawkes M.: Does Jaime have to roll for the amount of cash he has in his wallet?
Narrator : no he's a lancaster
Fawkes M.: Excellent
Space: they always pay their debts
Forrest then proceeds to do various internet searches for local snake-themed org
anizations
Gabby:
Narrator : British Columbian Snake Lovers
The Snake Order
Snakes United
Jaime pulls out a pretty big banknote
Forrest writes this shit down
Gabby sniffles and resumes with trying to get her composure back
Narrator : Scalie-Type Otherkin Union
Jaime: Sorry about that.
Jaime hands the bill over to Wallace
Steph: ...
Wallace: ... It's fine.
Gabby: ...U-uh...
Mac D.: can i have a note for Notes
Jaime: Keep the change, for your trouble.
Wallace: Colombo, let her go.
Gabby: ...Th-thank you... For listening...
Narrator : Colombo lets her go.
Steph: ...Geez...
I hope you didn't give them a tip.
Narrator : there duff
there you go
Jaime: I don't think I did.
Narrator : They walk off.
Jaime not willing to talk about le hefty prices
Lilly: ... It's nothing...
Lilly doesn't know what to think
Lilly: rolling 1d20
(
14
)
= 14
Steph: ...
Lilly but believes it
Forrest: ...isn't much, but it's a start....
Steph: ...Whoo... that was pretty fun.
Mac D.: ELIAS!?
Ed Stuart: ... Jaime Lancaster.
Ed Stuart watches them
Gabby:
Jaime: Heh... sorry we didn't-...
Steph: ...?
Jaime turns over to Ed
Steph: Jaime? Do you know this guy?
Gabby ah yes... the awkward interval following, where you have to think of some
nicety to patch things over
Ed Stuart scowls
Ed Stuart: Same as ever.
Jaime: You too, Ed. Just like middle school.
Steph is sensing some tension
Ed Stuart: ...
Forrest then takes the time to click over to his blog. "A Bunch Of Horseshit: Ho
w Everything You Know Is Wrong."
Forrest making sure Sooz isn't looking his way when the blog title is up
Forrest: .......
Jaime: Still selling winter coats for the family?
Year-round?
Ed Stuart: ...
Winter's coming, Jaime.
Steph: .......
Ed Stuart: Whether you like it or not.
Forrest folds his arms, wondering what he'll write about
Forrest: ......
Narrator : Sitkid is looking the other way.
Forrest ......Bottled Water. There's a subject he hasn't tackled yet.
Narrator : His blog stands before him, his small gathering of followers all onli
ne.
Forrest typity typity
Jaime shrugs
Jaime: Not a bad slogan.
Forrest the time has come to smash the barrel of falsehood and let loose the del
icious ale of TRUTH to the masses once more
Gabby wipes her eyes on her sleeve and clambers around for something else to eve
n say
Forrest or in this case, the plastic bottle and glorified tap water
Steph looks between the two of them, uncertainly
Forrest TYPITY TYPE
Narrator : roll mind to get particularily indpeth, increased, forrest
Ed Stuart: ... Goodbye.
Jaime: Goodbye.
Ed Stuart walks off, with a bunch of winter coats on his arm
(
18
+
20
+
11
)+1
= 50
they will know
THEY WILL ALL KNOW
Fawkes M.: Typical salesmen

Steph: ...Uh...
Ed Stuart is dying under the heat, was not meant for it
Mac D.: i can just picture forrest's online community
Narrator : This really is just art.
Fawkes M.: Is his neck melting?
Narrator : Like actually.
This will become famous.
Steph: Who was that guy>
?
Mac D.: there's the Normie, the smug skeptic with opposing conspiracy theories,
the guy who blames everything on the jews
Narrator : This is the single best post.
Gabby: ...If... If you wanna know more about the stuff... Steph's got good notes
on it...
Forrest: .......
Narrator : They will eat this shit up.
Forrest cracks
Narrator : And
Jaime: ...Just
Steph: An old,
Okay.
his knuckles. Just another day on the job.....

then shit in their own mouths just to get some more.
an old friend from middle school.
uhm...
Ed Stuart 's neck in particular is badly sunburned and red

Lilly: I-I'll...
We'll talk about it tomorrow.
Mobile L: Ten minute warning on my end, maybe a bit fewer. I can recap myself, t
hough.
Fawkes M.: He needs a steak for his neck
Lilly: I just need to think about all of this
Forrest aaaaand, POST.
Forrest the world is not ready, but it needs to understand
Jaime: ...
Gabby: ...I... I understand...
Steph: ...Wanna walk me home?

Gabby just sorta nods, shallowly, and swallows
Space: https://40.media.tumblr.com/d32f19f9d3e7ab4102e413b6ef78f6ae/tumblr_nzn0p
yzIXL1qzd1axo1_540.jpg sin
Jaime: ...Oh. Sure.
Lilly stands up
Lilly: Bye.
Fawkes M.: oh GOD
Lilly hurries off
Steph smiles at him
Narrator : He posts it.
Jaime takes a second to smile back
Narrator : The wold will be changed.
Forrest: ......
Forrest boots up Doom
Gabby: ...Bye...
Lel Shitkid just aced the entire game in these few minutes
Lel Shitkid somehow did a speedrun
Lel Shitkid: ... Yay!
Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks back at her
Jaime: ...Which way is your house, again?
Lel Shitkid: I did it!
Forrest: Beat it?
Lel Shitkid: Yeah!
Narrator : Gabby is alone.
Until
Forrest: ...Hm....A little slower than last time.
Steph: Oh, it's this way.
Narrator : A tall, pasty, awkward guy who's all sweaty walks up to her
Steph starts a-walkin'
Gabby: ?
Narrator : Carrying a bunch of winter coats
Forrest: Were you messing around more this time?
Jaime walks along with her
Ed Stuart: ... Winter's coming.
Gabby has clearly been crying, a lot
Ed Stuart: ...
Steph: Oh, hey, Lilly!
Jaime: Hey.
Lilly blanches on the sight of them and quickly rushes past
Steph: ...
Steph looks back over her shoulder at her
Gabby is a tiny, intense-looking girl who has been crying violently
Gabby:
Steph: ...Does she...?
...
Steph keeps walking
Ed Stuart: I, eh...
Jaime: ...Probably not.
Ed Stuart: ... Christ, are you goin' to be alright?
Jaime does likewise
Steph: ...
Gabby: ...Y-yeah... 'M not gonna... go into detail...
Steph fuck it's the politician fucko
Gabby: That'd just...
Sherwood Cotter is kissing babies and putting up posters

Steph: Ugh.
Let's take the long way.
Naomi: sorry duff
i missed you
Fawkes M.: Recap me on this person? I wasn't there for them

Space: :c naomi
Mac D.: it's okay dead girl
Gabby: ...Sorry... I don't... I don't have cash, either...
Space: oh he was giving a speech
Fawkes M.: You two don't have emotional attachments either way
Space: teddy disruptted it to shout about conspiracies
Mac D.: a redneck throws red paint on cotter and runs off
Fawkes M.: I recall violence and-- ah
Lel Shitkid: I was...
Mac D.: "JUSTICE FOR THE GARDEN DISTRICTS"
Lel Shitkid: I liked hitting the Mayor.
Forrest: No one likes the Mayor.
Steph starts to go the long way
Space: kinda looks like hes sideeying her from there
Jaime: Yeah, let's.
Lel Shitkid: He makes a funny noise!
Ed Stuart: ...
Here.
Ed Stuart puts a coat down by here
Steph: ...So, uhm..
Ed Stuart: For free.
Fawkes M.: Sorry, my map is wonky
Space: now orries
Fawkes M.: Just the trackpad
Forrest: Just make sure you don't hit any real mayors. The noises they make aren
't as funny.
Forrest checks the clock to see how close the ETA for mum and da are
Gabby: ...Uh... Frick, you don't... You don't gotta do that...
Jaime: ...?
Gabby guilt-sniffle
Sherwood Cotter is so self-absored he doesn't notice them
Steph: Sometimes I think about stuff like... y'know, how long I'm gonna be aroun
d.
Ed Stuart: Don't worry.
I'll be fine.
Jaime: ...
Ed Stuart: ...
My name is Ed.
Ed Stuart.
Narrator : Well.
Just as he does that.
Gabby: ...Uh... 'M Gabby... Gabby, uh... Tran...
Steph: And, uh... if you get into a mindset where your time is limited, then nat
urally it's going to... um, lemme back up.
Gabby gives a small nod and tries to get the cordial-serious look again
Space: holy god
Loren Freeman steps inside the house, followed by her husband
Forrest: ...?
Jaime: What is it?
Bryce Freeman takes off his boots
Steph: Jaime, I don't know what to think about you.
Forrest: Sounds like they're home, Sooz.

Bryce Freeman: Sooz, Forrest!
Jaime: ....
Steph: ...
Wow, saying that was the worst idea I've ever had!
Let's, um.
...
Forrest waves
Forrest: Hey, Dad.
Steph: Let's keep going? Uh... my house is pretty close.
Ed Stuart: ...
Stay safe, Gabby.
Jaime: ...Oh, that's good. Just a bit more, right?
Steph: Yep!
Just a bit more.
Ed Stuart: Winter's really cold.
Steph: Just, uh... y'know, a little while.
Space: i like ed
Gabby: ...Y-you too... Uh... Thank you...
Ed Stuart walks off
Gabby sniffles and nods to him as he leaves
Gabby:
Steph hurries, somewhat bashful now
Forrest shuts off the computer and looks over at them
Bryce Freeman: Hey, Forrest.
Gabby takes some deep breaths, gets up and manages to get back home
Bryce Freeman: How's the new school?
Mobile L: aaaand that is all for tonight, from me
Steph too preoccupied with Certain Troubles to notice the baseball fanatic follo
wing them
Space: guden nachten mobile
Loren Freeman immediatly goes to play with Sooz
Mac D.: rest well mob
Jaime just accompanies her, not exactly sure if that meant what he suspected...
Mobile L: Will recap myself, good sesh. G'night, all.
Loren Freeman: night
Fawkes M.: Guten nacht
Forrest: It's fine. First day was okay.
How was work.
Jaime: ...
Bryce Freeman: It was great. Forrest, I love it here.
Mac D.: can you just picture
this joyous anime family
and this miserable fat fuck standing with them
Space: cherry blossoms fluttering down gently
Bryce Freeman: It's so wild.
Mac D.: Wild?
Jaime: ...Do you hear that?
Forrest: isaidthat
Liz Rubik : Hey, you two.
Steph looks back

Liz Rubik : I saw that lightshow yesterday.
Steph: ...Hey, you're that, uh...
...
Liz Rubik : Don't beat around the bush.
Fawkes M.: Wait, is this the speech person?
Liz Rubik : no
Fawkes M.: Missing one sesh really kriffed with me
Liz Rubik : she saw the fight with quest they had
Space: she's a baseball player in another school, steph knows of her because she
follows local sports
Forrest: .....Yeah, I guess you could call it wild.
Bryce Freeman: Yeah...
Forrest: The bus drivers around here seem eccentric, to say the least.
Bryce Freeman: All those trees.
Bus drivers?
Steph: ...I'm not... sure? What you're talking about??
Forrest: Yeah, I took the bus to get home.
Fawkes M.: But nothing of notable violence happened to her?
Bryce Freeman: nope
Fawkes M.: Or involving her
Bryce Freeman: she saw their fight with quest but no one noticed
Fawkes M.: Gotcher
Bryce Freeman: How eccentric?
Forrest: I am almost entirely certain he was an escaped convict.
Bryce Freeman: Jersey eccentric?
Jaime: ...Do you play baseball?
Jaime being a shirou
Bryce Freeman: Oh, Detroit eccentric.
Liz Rubik : Name's Liz, bub.
Forrest: Yeah, I wouldn't go that far.
Liz Rubik : I love baseball.
Forrest: I didn't die, though, which is evident.
Liz Rubik : But what I love more's a good story, and I'd like it if you'd give i
t to me straight, like a good apple pie.
What was with the magic shit?
Steph: (...oh my god)
Vlad is watching this, thinking "What the fuck"
Jaime: Um... I'm not exactly sure what you're talking about.
Mac D.: do steph and jaime think this is how Americans talk
Steph: Is this some kind of viral marketing thing?
Bryce Freeman: Oh, well, uh...
Steph yes
Mac D.: GOOD
Forrest: ....So work was good?
Bryce Freeman: ... He didn't, uh, I- Oh!
Jaime probably
Bryce Freeman: I planted at least one hundred and ten trees!
Forrest: Sh-....Uh, Dang. That's got to be a new record.
Bryce Freeman: It was!
Liz Rubik : I said give it to me straight.
I don't have time for messing around, I gotta make my next game.
Forrest: Oh, cool. Did they give you a bonus or anything?
Jaime: ...No, really, I don't have a clue.
Steph: I've got to go home. And I have... uh, no idea what the fuck you're talki
ng about.
Soooooooooo...
Bryce Freeman: Sure did!
We're gonna go out to a nice restaurant on Saturday to celebrate!
Jaime wondering if they'll have to stall her till the game comes up
Forrest: Oh, cool, where to?
Liz Rubik stares right through Steph's soul
Liz Rubik : roll spirit
Steph: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + -1 for Spirit
{(
16
+
7
+
18
)}+-1
= 15
Space: praise be
Jaime: attagirl
Liz Rubik : rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 2 for Spirit
{(
15
+
8
+
1
)}+2
= 10
Liz Rubik scowls
Jaime: thanks, lancer
Space: canadian jesus
Bryce Freeman: We're going to the Du Pont De Gerard!
Steph: ...
Bryce Freeman: It's French! Well, French Canadian.
Jaime: ...
Forrest: Sounds fancy....Never had french food before.
I have Canadian food, earlier today.
Steph figures that she's got to do something that vlad will remember, rather tha
n him remembering the magic stuff
Steph takes Jaime's hand
Bryce Freeman: Oh yeah?
Steph: Okay, let's go.
Forrest: Yeah, in the cafeteria.
Jaime: --!
Vlad: Liz, fuck off, go fondle those balls.
Forrest: ...Y'know, 'cause we're in Canada...
Steph: ...
Jaime: ...Alright, yeah.
Steph fuck, the hand was unnecessary
Steph vlad is a trustworth...
Bryce Freeman: Hahahah!
Liz Rubik smirks
Steph can't let go now...

Liz Rubik : You wish, Vlad.
Forrest: ....-clear throatLiz Rubik walks off
Steph the situation is awkward
Steph keeps going...
Forrest: ....Hey, um, I was gonna head to one of the libraries in town, that oka
y?
Jaime doesn't let go juuust yet
Vlad continues being sullen
Steph: ...
Bryce Freeman: Hehahah- Oh, uh, sure.
Just be careful.
Steph pulls her hand away when it's safe to do so
Forrest: I will, don't worry. I'll keep off the buses this time.
Steph: ...Figured it'd get his mind off that, um...
...Gosh, we're almost there.
Bryce Freeman: Loren could, uh, drive you.
Forrest shakes its head
Bryce Freeman: its
forrest isn't human
Forrest: you've seen too much, father
i'm sorry
SKREEEE
Bryce Freeman: no
Jaime: Yeah, almost there.
Bryce Freeman: urghhhh
Jaime glances over at his watch again
Forrest: It's fine. There's a library not far from here.
Steph: ...
Steph mumbles
Narrator : It's like 4:00
Forrest: Besides, you guys just got home from work.
Narrator : 4:30
Fawkes M.: Should I have Jaime roll to catch that?
Bryce Freeman: Alright.
Space: do it
Bryce Freeman: Well, call if you need anything.
Forrest: I will. Promise.
{(
4
+
16
+
9
)}+-1
= 8
Narrator : catch what
Jaime: nothing
Space: what steph mumbled
Forrest: See you, Dad. See you, Mom. Later, Sooz.

Narrator : They all say bye.
They love you, Forrest.
Except Uncle Lester.
Forrest they fucking shouldn't
Narrator : But he's in jail now
Steph: ...
Fawkes M.: They have to love you unless they go to jail
Forrest at least Uncle Lester was honest in his shame
Jaime: ...
Steph: ...Jaime, there's...
Narrator : if you don't love forrest
you go to jail
Forrest heads to the lie-berry
Steph: ...Never mind.
It's just up ahead.
Space: having fun
isn't hard
when you've got a library card
Jaime: ...
Forrest walks out the door, and his relaxed-but-exhausted face immediately rever
ts to his irritated-and-exhausted face the second he steps out
Jaime tries to see if he can see the house from here
Forrest does he bump into any freaks on his way there
Forrest approaches the library front gates
Space: how deep does the rabbit hole go...???!?
Fawkes M.: Take the red pill
Narrator : No, but the library is full of freaks
Forrest excellent
Forrest his ELEMENT
Forrest enters the institute of learning
Narrator : HE CAN, JAIME
YOU CAN
THERE IT IS
THE RED BRICK HOUSE
LOOK THERE
No one stares at him as he enters.
Jaime: ...Is that it over there?
Narrator : Look at all of these colourful characters.
What do you do now Forrest.
Steph: Yeah, that's it.
Jaime keeps a-walking thataway
Narrator : Jaime walks right up to it
He can smell it
It smells like coffee.
Steph: ...I'm not sure if Grandpa is home yet, so...
Forrest offers the freaks the same courtesy
Forrest approaches the front desk
Forrest: Excuse me.

Narrator : The guy at the front desk looks at him
Mac D.: the town's called richmond right
Jaime right, her grandpa...
Narrator : Belmont
Jaime: oh my gof
*god
Mac D.: belmont thank you
Narrator : richmond is a town in ontario
Space: richmond virginia
Steph knock knock knock
Jaime waits
Forrest: I'm looking for books on the local history of Belmont.
Narrator : No one answers.
Fawkes M.: Where'd you get Richmond?
Space: wow jasper and hall are hanging together after school even
Narrator : The crusty old guy running the place points at the place
with the books
Steph gets out her key and opens the door
Forrest approaches BOOK
Forrest hunts for BOOK
Jaime was about to open his mouth before KEY
(
16
+
17
+
10
)+1
= 44
Narrator : Oh, there's a COMPREHENSIVE ONE
Space: a clear understanding of the dewey decimal system
Forrest: ...
Steph: ...Uh...
Forrest checks the title
Steph: ...I have a parrot.
Narrator : The Entire History of Belmont and Surrounding Areas: From Antiquity t
o Modern Era.
Jaime: ...Oh. What's his name?
Forrest yeah this one's a keeper
Forrest tucks it under his arm
Narrator : The door is open to steph's house
there's a statue of buddha in the doorway
Forrest AND NOW: to find a book on local legend and folklore
Narrator : as in
in the entrance
like
not
IN
(
13
+
12
+
10
)+1
= 36
Narrator : the doorway
Steph: It's, uh, it's Prospero.
Narrator : Oh, there are a couple on First Nations folklore.
Jaime: Ah.
...
Forrest TAKES that shit too
Narrator : A writing by the old Bishop of the Archdiocese.
Steph: ...
Forrest is also making little effort to tune out the conversations around him
Jaime: ...
...Should I go?
Steph: I don't even know.
...
Steph quickly
Steph: I- I mean, um... I don't know if that's... you know, proper or not.
Forrest: your hair smells foul
Dr. Graham and Dr. Venter are having a hushed, intense-ass conversation
Forrest: get it out of my face
....?
Forrest gives it a listen
Gordon Knotts is alone
Dr. Hall is talking to the student like a rapist
Jaime: ...Do we have a lot of homework?
Steph: I got most of mine done in class...
Forrest Gordon Knotts.........
Jaime: Right.
Dr. Graham: I don't know what's going on, but it's clearly not normal.
Forrest wonders where he's heard that name before
Dr. Graham: You have to ackJaime: Sorry, just - this day's felt like a few weeks.
(
16
+
17
+
17
)+1
= 51
Steph: ...Did-Did you?
Dr. Venter: Those children are in serious danger, Looey.

Dr. Graham: Not my name.
Forrest: ........?
Forrest but enough of THAT shit what are THESE two old biddies talking about
Gordon Knotts is known to Forrest as a really weird author
Forrest ahhh.....an author in a library!
Forrest probably here to shill a book
Gordon Knotts is peacefully reading
Fawkes M.: Shit, did he?
Mac D.: his computer probably overheated
Narrator : uh i think he probably has some
but not much
idk
Space: my connection
Dr. Graham: hi space
Forrest: .....
Dr. Graham: We...
You're right...
Forrest social interaction is oil to his water, so he keeps himself to himself a
nd continues to listen to the two doctors
Dr. Graham: The project can wait.
I think we should lend them a hand.
Dr. Venter: Now that is the ticket.
Forrest: (...Project?)
Jaime: ...Yeah, I've done most of it, too.
Dr. Venter: You can't fix the human condition if you won't help kids, yes?
Forrest: ....
Dr. Graham: ... I suppose?
I don't know how you keep roping me into this...
Steph: I could help you finish it...
Dr. Graham: All I wanted was to get Hall's licence revoked...
Forrest: .....
Mac D.: and then they KISSSSSSSED
Forrest: .....
Forrest oh this has nothing to do with monsters does it
Jaime: ...Sure, that'll help.
Dr. Venter: Come on!
Jaime: Thanks.
Dr. Venter stands up
Dr. Venter heads out, quickly checking out some books
Forrest: .......
Space: i think the connection is doing the thing where it pauses and then a bunc
h get sent out at once
Dr. Venter: she can help jaime fix it
Steph: Yeah, just - come on in.
Steph enters
Mac D.: i also know that pain
Forrest: ......
Narrator : On the other side...
Jaime steps in
Forrest looks over at the other side
Narrator : It seems like creepy fatty is shatting with oldman.
Steph: Uh... wanna meet Prospero? He can talk...
Forrest: ...?
Forrest more new faces
Narrator : Your weird history teacher is sitting there, dead eyed.
Forrest ....Well, a little more eavesdropping can't hurt
Jaime: Oh, um - sure.
Forrest: .....
Narrator : A fat old.... Japanese? lady is happily reading
And some hipster is too
Mac D.: OBA SAN
Steph goes to grab the burd from her room
Fawkes M.: Headsup - gotta sign out by :25
Mac D.: WE MUST BE CAREFUL
Narrator : kk
Space: thatd be wise for me too
Roland Glass: That's a very interesting view on it, I myself take the more ortho
dox Tibetan view of the whole affair, you know?
shit
Ronald Karling: i said that
Forrest: ...
Forrest quietly shuffles over to the other end of the library and has a sit, lis
tening to the two men and watching the two women
Forrest *two women and an OBAASAN
Fawkes M.: Wait, so
The Buddha statue was in the library?
Forrest oh god fucking RELIGIONNN
Roger Perkins: I appreciate the Buddhist way of looking at life, but don't think
I could sing up with it myself.
no
it was in
steph;s house
Jaime waits
Jaime exhales a bit
Fawkes M.: Karling
Karloman
Roger Perkins: he's her maternal grandfather
Fawkes M.: Tibet
Oh
I'm a baka
Steph: Heya, Prospero... got a new friend for you to meet!
Forrest: .....
Narrator : The fat old lady is just really jovial, smiling.
The dead-eyed woman seems on th verge of just dying.
And the hipster is a hipster
Roger Perkins: Anyway, my name's Roger, what's yours?
Ronald Karling: Ah, Ronald.
It's very good to meet you, Roger.
Forrest looks over at his bummed-out teacher, the hipster, and the POWERFUL OBAA
SAN
Roger Perkins: It's mutual.
That's the best conversation I've had in years.
I knew going to the library was worth it today.
Ms. Lao is not bummed out
Ms. Lao looks dead inside
Ms. Lao just fucking dead
Forrest: ......
Forrest thinks
Forrest the history teacher might know something of interest....
Forrest approaches her
Forrest: Excuse me.
Space: whaddabout the burd
Ms. Lao: ...
Narrator : Propspero is sleeping.
Forrest: .........
Steph: ...Oh...
Narrator : Enjoy your fucking sleeping bird.
Steph heads back down to the living room
Steph: Sorry, he's taking a little nap...
Forrest: ....Ms. Lao.
Jaime: ...That's fine.
Ms. Lao: ...
Hello.
Space: my plan to get seer to roleplay as a parrot isn't coming to fruition
Steph: ...Well, uh, let's get started.
Forrest: ...It's Forrest, from school.
Steph begins the session of tutoring and schoolsing
Jaime: Yeah, let's get started.
Forrest: The new kid. The American.
Steph it is awkward, and the tension
Jaime is the pupil
Mac D.: and then they KISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSED
Ms. Lao nods
Space: duff, the shipper
Fawkes M.: And then Iblis opened both of their hearts to the sky because he ship
s it too
THE END
Space: good end
Fawkes M.: If you need me, I shall be on the Skyp
Forrest: ....I'm looking to learn about this town's local history. Do you know i
f anything of particular interest happened that I should research
Space: far wale
Fawkes M.: Fair whales
Ms. Lao: ... No...
...
One thing...
Maybe.
There was...
Forrest: ...Can you tell me.
Ms. Lao sighs
Ms. Lao: Nevermind.
It doesn't matter.
Forrest: Ah-..Sorry.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt, please go on.
Space: well my friends
Ms. Lao: ... It really doesn't matter.
Space: this was a good esh
Ms. Lao: make like a leaf
Space: but i'm phone too now
Forrest: It is a subject of interest to me.
Ms. Lao: ...
There was a big explosion in the sixties...
By our school...
It killed a lot of people, and no one knows quite what happened...
Forrest: ......So it's a mystery.
Ms. Lao: Yes.
Forrest: This is exactly what I was looking for, thank you.
Ms. Lao: ... You're welcome.
Forrest writes some shit down
Forrest then looks back up at her
Forrest: Thank you very much, Ms. Lao. I'll see you in class tomorrow.
Ms. Lao: ...
Ms. Lao nods
Forrest: ...
Forrest quietly excuses himself to check out his books and go the fuck home
Ms. Lao: and that's a rap
Mac D.: maaan i fuckin love this roll20
Ms. Lao: i take it you enjoyed it
Mac D.: YE
i love playing a grouchy fuck
Ms. Lao: what did you think about the npcs you've met
Mac D.: all of em
i diggum
especially that richard monepenny...
Richard Moneypenny: i'm magic
Forrest: out, wizard
spirit begone from this houst
Richard Moneypenny: eueeugugghghg
Mac D.: but yeah god damn i cannot WAIT for the next sesh
Richard Moneypenny: it's fun to gm
Mac D.: it's fun to play
that obaasan has some sort of significance i KNOW IT
Richard Moneypenny: hehe
Mac D.: i'm trying to find the orchestral rendition of the phoenix wright corner
ed themes
for use when Forrest exposes TRUTH
Richard Moneypenny: i'll find something
if you had to pick a favorite npc so far
Mac D.: mu
Richard Moneypenny: really
Mac D.: yeah
i find him to be very interesting and Genuinely Mysterious
Richard Moneypenny: good

i like forrest
Mac D.: you dooo?
Richard Moneypenny: he's the hero this city needs
Mac D.: i FOUND IT
Richard Moneypenny: what
oh yes
Mac D.: the Cornered theme i want to use
Richard Moneypenny: i know
Mac D.: i can't find it on soundcloud but i can get riv to convert it
pick betweeeeen
the original
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rr9AVYDEeMQ
or its orchestral arrangement
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MD9pL-qWASY
Richard Moneypenny: orchestral
Mac D.: wait hang on
how about this cover
https://soundcloud.com/crane43/pursuit-wanting-to-find-the-truth
and this one's on soundcloud
Richard Moneypenny: i'll take it
Forrest: I can say, without a doubt, Iblis.
That I know for a fact.....
Forrest POINTS
Forrest: ...Why kids love the taste of Cinnamon Toast Crunch!
Iblis: No! Impossible.
Forrest: You did a good job cleaning up the scene of the crime...but you left on
e damning piece of evidence.
Iblis: I did no such thing..
Forrest POINT
Forrest: A single cereal piece, lying under the ottoman.
Forrest TAKE THAT!
Forrest: Oh? Then explain this.
Forrest holds up a plastic bag....containing a piece of Cinnamon Toast Crunch!!
Iblis: Shit.
I mean.
OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
Forrest: We analyzed it back at the lab, confirming an EXPLOSIVE amount of cinna
mony flavor in every. Single. Bite.
Iblis undergoes a breakdown
Forrest: This case.....
Forrest turns his back
Forrest: ....Is closed.
Iblis rubs his arm
Iblis: ... That's how I went to prison.
Mac D.: forrest is gonna be a fun time
Forrest: ...
Forrest looks back
Forrest: i had a feeling i'd find you here.....the iblis trigger
it's no use
how bout THIS
eldritch s. (GM): hello
Mac D.: there u are

eldritch s. (GM): i'm here
Mac D.: i can see
eldritch s. (GM): why have you come
Mac D.: oh i just wanted to hang out and listen to the music you got
eldritch s. (GM): okay
Mac D.: so
explain the cosmology of the setting to me again
eldritch s. (GM): right
what is your knowledge base
Mac D.: okay so what i got is
the ordinary mortal world is the First Heaven
Mac D.: the fucked up monster mash they go to is the Second Heaven
Mac D.: and the goal they're aware of so far is to find and open the door to the
Third Heaven which is apparently a paradise where all your dreams come true, an
actual Heaven
eldritch s. (GM): basically yes
Mac D.: i wonder why they're all called Heavens...
eldritch s. (GM): goo question
mr mu says that nihilists were made to guard the third heaven, as he says the se
cond one was made to test humans on their way
he says they did too good of a job and it wasn't fair
so he was made to help humans
Mac D.: does he know of any existence outside the Heavens
eldritch s. (GM): well that includes like our universe
so no he doesn't
Mac D.: odd how our universe is classified as a "Heaven"....
i mean the second heaven doesn't deserve that title either
it's horrible
Mac D.: it's more like Hell
eldritch s. (GM): it's also divided into several parts
styx is the overlap between the 1st and 2nd heavens
then there's lethe, erebus, phlegethon, acheron, cocytus, and tartarus
Mac D.: are those like realms
eldritch s. (GM): more like regions i suppose
Mac D.: are they regions of the second heaven or like islands on Styx
eldritch s. (GM): regions of the second heaven
Mac D.: ahh i see
are they like psychological representations of shit
eldritch s. (GM): who knows
Mac D.: god i wanna play again tonight HRRRGH
eldritch s. (GM): so do i
Mac D.: so what is Bryce's job
eldritch s. (GM): he plants trees
Mac D.: good man
what's loren do
eldritch s. (GM): i don't know
what would she do
Mac D.: she doesn't like to talk about her job at home
what's the canadian equivalent of the National Guard
wait no
she's a Mountie
we have no national guard, by the way
just army reserves and such
wait how recent was this move
Mac D.: a couple days
eldritch s. (GM): i think yeah she could be am ountie

WAIT
she's not a canadian citizen
she can't be
unless
she has
eldritch s. (GM): she came from canada
dual citizenship, is what i'm getting at
Mac D.: back in Hoboken she was known as one of the most brutally hard-boiled an
d successful police officers in the country
the Canadian goverment bypassed processes and specifically asked for her by name
to fill their ranks, offering a huge sum of money
she was just that good
Mac D.: it's the reason behind the move
Mac D.: course you'd never guess just by looking at her because she is a sweet a
nime mom
eldritch s. (GM): https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/0b/91/15/0b911566566
60f6e2c757876c006dfd6.jpg this is the everyday mountie uniform, by the way
they don't wear the red shit all the time
Mac D.: background plot: Loren wages a one-woman war on the Canadian Bottled Wat
er Industry after the revelation of an anonymous blog post cracking the horrific
underbelly of the business right open
Mac D.: now i'm picturing the Freemans being this family of secret badasses
eldritch s. (GM): sooz is a prodigy at games
loren is the ace cop
Mac D.: "bryce dear the north koreans are invading belmont"
"hang on sweetie let's get suited up"
eldritch s. (GM): i like to imagine bryce is just fucking helpless
Mac D.: bryce opens up a secret doorway to the basement leading to a hallway lin
ed with illegal firearms
eldritch s. (GM): his wife is liking doing judo moves
and snapping necks
and he's just trying to plant a tree
Mac D.: "honey, i know you're busy, but this noise is gonna hurt the sapling....
"
i like to imagine that bryce is a rather meek and harmless man compared to his w
ife
until you fuck with his trees
eldritch s. (GM): he grabs his shovel
and beats the guy to death with it
Mac D.: "someone needs a lesson in respecting nature"
eldritch s. (GM): he tears off his shirt
he's ripped
Mac D.: he's covered in scars from fighting off bears
Space: all the party member fathers are meek and harmless except jaime
*'s
Johann Lancaster: I'm not helpless or meek.
Space: thats right
Johann Lancaster: I'll kill you.
I'll kill your family.
I'll kill your family's family.
Mac D.: hey could you shut off the rain sound effect it's kind of fucking with t
he audio of the music for me
Space: hes just a lawyer
Johann Lancaster: I'm a debt relief lawyer.
Lancasters always pay their debts.
Mac D.: i can just picture
the freemans all standing back to back

fighting second heaven monsters
and forrest is just standing there, annoyed as always
Mr. Mu: They're called Nihilists~
Steph: shut up mr. mu
Narrator : Fight Mr. Mu Y/N
Forrest: wow sis you're pretty good with an AK
Steph: y
Space: what happens if one of the party members attacks mr mu
Forrest: i'll pass
good luck though
Forrest walks over to a chair and watches
Mac D.: he gets this horrifying, scary aura about him
and then just politely asks them not to hurt him
Mr. Mu: in reality he would just shrug it off
Mr. Mu shakes his head
Mr. Mu: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Brawn
{(
6
+
11
+
4
)}+3
= 9
Mr. Mu slips and dies
Mac D.: "EMBRACE ETERNITY"
tiny baby slaps ensue"
Space: what if they attacked iblis
Mac D.: oh that would probably be immediate death
Forrest: steph
steph
Steph: what
Forrest: there's....something i want to tell you.....
Steph: what is it
Forrest: you got this really huge zit on your face
Steph: forrest
i own a firearm
Forrest: i'm serious it's on your forehead
Steph: forrest your entire face is a zit
Forrest: look in a god damn mirror if you don't believe me
Steph: i believe you
but you're a zit
i just wanted to make that clear
Forrest: i'm trying to help out here
Steph: zit-man
Forrest: i was letting you know so you could take care of it holy shit
Steph: you're just a zit
it's all you are
it's all you ever wil lbe
*will be
Forrest: why are you such a bitch
oh wait that's right your parents are dead
Steph: don't be MEAN
Forrest: you're right
our mothers taught us better
oh wait
Steph: ..........
Steph cries
Forrest: ........
.....ok i may have gone too far in a few places
Iblis: someone said they were going to fight me
Forrest: iblis fuck off
Steph bawls
Forrest: ok look i'm sorry i didn't mean what i said i was just trying to get ba
ck at you
Steph: .....
Forrest: ok we cool
Steph: ...we cool
Forrest: aiight
Iblis: are you going to fight me
Steph: i...
it won't fill the sadness in me...
Iblis: what
Forrest: ......what about tacos
Steph: i need to... to move on, and accept life for as it is
Forrest: yeah
Steph: how about fajitas
Forrest: fuck no
eldritch s. (GM): right duff you can remember shit
where did we leave off
Mac D.: in terms of plot?
Mac D.: okay so they returned to Normal Spacetime
steph and jaime went on a date to irish food place where they were horrible peop
le, then they walked to Steph's house and began studying together there
forrest fucked off home, had some quality time with his lovely family, blew the
bottle water conspiracy wide open, then went to the library to get some books, o
verheard two doctors talk about something or other, then Ms. Lao told him about
some mysterious explosion
Jaime: that wasn't a date!
...is what i would tell steph
Steph: ;)
Mac D.: gabby fucking broke down and cried alone and an actual friend had to sho
w up and be a decent person to her
Jaime: he is NOT YOUR FRIEND, GABBY TRAN
Mac D.: she told Lily all about the Heaven bullshit
also why is Ms. Lao a walking corpse
eldritch s. (GM): right so can i just cut to like tomorrow then
no one knows
Mac D.: i don't see why not
Fawkes M.: I'm chill with a cut
Steph: i'm a cut
Mac D.: it'll skip over steph and jaime's makeout session though.....
eldritch s. (GM): too bad
Fawkes M.: I heard that in the F-Zero announcer voice, Seer
eldritch s. (GM): i am the f-zero announcer
Fawkes M.: Say "YOU GOT BOOST POWER"
Mobile L: Gabby got stone-cold abandoned
eldritch s. (GM): you got boost power
Mac D.: ANIME OPEN
Mobile L: Except for by nice coat man
Fawkes M.: S-sugoi...
Forrest sits in the middle of a Scalie-type Otherkin convention, looking like a
man who longs for death

Fawkes M.: Now say "YEAH, THE FINAL LAP"
eldritch s. (GM): yeah, the final lap
Fawkes M.: i-it's better than in the game...
Steph is at the scalie-type otherkin convention
Gabby is punching the crap outta scalie-type otherkin at the convention
Mac D.: i want this immortalized in art
Jaime is getting his right hand sawn off at this otherkin convention
Gabby: IT SHALL BE DONE, M'LORD
eldritch s. (GM): yeah just because
there's a stand
and they cut your hand off
for a fee
Jaime: hey, i thought it was negative money
eldritch s. (GM): "no, you think we're made of cash? we're going to make a golde
n hand with this money and then shove it up your ass"
Jaime: thanks, bronn
Narrator : NOW
AT SCHOOL.
Forrest: god dammit did nathan fart again
Narrator : Class has gathered for education.
Forrest: he's trying to play it off too the fucking douche
Narrator : Their homeroom teacher, Ms. Rachel Lachance, sits at her desk, a deep
scowl on her face.
Gabby: lilly is smiling but i know she hates me now
Steph is ready for education
Forrest looks at Ms. Lachance with his standard expression
Lilly is smiling and pleased as she ever is
Gabby managed to calm down a bit yesterday, but is still kind of out-of-sorts
Jasper is weird
Jaime looking forward at the teacher for once
Vlad makes no attmpt to hide the fact that he's looking at Steph
Forrest evidently did not get much sleep
Ms. Lachance: Kids.
Ms. Lachance chugs her coffee
Steph: .....
Steph tries not to look at him
Jaime makes no attempt to hide the fact that he's not looking at Steph
Ms. Lachance: I take it that you all met the new kid.
Forrest: Hi.
Ms. Lachance slams her cup down, silencing the BGM
Gabby nods, out-of-sorts-ly
Jaime nods once
Forrest: ...
Ms. Lachance: I haven't.
What's your name.
Forrest: .......
Forrest Freeman.
Vlad begins staring at Jaime
Jaime: ...
Gabby has that coat the NICE, NON-ABANDONING PERSON gave her yesterday
Jaime not looking back
Ms. Lachance: That's good, Forrest.
Now, first thing.
Ms. Lachance chugs her mug
Ms. Lachance begins refilling it
Forrest: ....
Ms. Lachance: I've been told the new curriculum needs me to talk to you about gr
ammar and literary devices.
Gabby looks at lachance-sensei like "just frick me up"
Mac D.: just frick me up fam
Ms. Lachance: I thought you learned this in kindergarten but evidently not.
Mac D.: just frick my poop up
Steph: ..
Ms. Lachance: So, let's take this nice and easy for you kids.
Forrest: ....
Jaime: ......
Gabby: frick that crap the fricking heck up, motherfricker
Forrest appreciates this teacher
Gabby yo, same
Jaime: have you had it with these snakes on this plane, gabby
Gabby: I HAVE HAD IT, WITH THESE MONKEY-FIGHTING SNAKES ON THIS MONDAY-TO-FRIDAY
PLANE
Ms. Lachance: What's an apostrophe, in regards to the poetic device. If you ratt
le off the grammatical definition, I'll beat you senseless.
(
1
+
12
+
10
)+1
= 24
{(
1
+
13
+
12
)}
= 12
{(
14
+
17
+
13
)}+-1
= 13
holy
{(
6
+
8
+
15
)}+1
= 9
Narrator : Jaime, suddenly being just a fucking wizard, puts his hand up. Tellin
g the bitch that an apostrophe is when one speaks to an abstract concept or inan
imate object.
Forrest: ....
Steph: ...!
Steph looks back at him
Forrest gives a glance at Jaima
Narrator : jaima
Forrest well fuck the caveman has a taste for the arts
Narrator : jaima
Jaime: ...
Narrator : aunt jaima
Mac D.: i will never not pronounce it "hai may" and you can't stop me
Jaime just looking at Ms. Lachance, waiting for her response
Forrest: ...
Forrest looks back forward
Ms. Lachance: That's right.
Good.
...
Gabby:
Ms. Lachance reaches into a drawer
Space: a gun
Ms. Lachance pulls out a jube jube
Ms. Lachance: Catch.
Ms. Lachance fucking lobs it at him
Mac D.: a fucking jujube
Jaime: --!
Fawkes M.: Does he have to roll?
Mac D.: what is this ed edd n eddy
Ms. Lachance: yeah
{(
13
+
4
+
7
)}+1
= 8
Ms. Lachance scowls as it his Jaime in the eye
Ms. Lachance sips her coffee
Jaime: Agh--!
Steph: ...!
Ms. Lachance: Right, there goes that reward system.
Gabby:
Ms. Lachance: What's a soliloquy?
Gabby ...man... life is frickin' pretty tiring...
(
11
+
12
+
18
)+1
= 42
{(
4
+
11
+
7
)}+1
= 8
{(
12
+
10
+
9
)}
= 10
Jaime puts one hand over his eye and picks up the jujube with the other
Ms. Lachance: he picks up his eye
Mobile L: Motherfucking Forrest tearing shit up
Jaime: hey, that roll was only as big as mine
Narrator : Forrest raises his hand
He tells her that a soliloquy is when a fictional character goes on a monologue
to the audience.
Gabby feels of her coat
Ms. Lachance: Ten points to Gryffindor.
Fawkes M.: Which eye got hit?
Forrest: Also, I have a question.
Narrator : right
Fawkes M.: Perfect
Narrator : The coat is good.
It's high quality.
Thick.
Fur..
Like
Not entirely fur
Narrator : but there's like some likely synthetic fur bits
Gabby will cherish this thing until the day she dies... which will probably be s
oon...
Ms. Lachance: What.
Forrest: If I bring in cups of coffee, do I get extra credit.
Ms. Lachance chugs her mug again
Jaime , due to his peripheral vision being messed up by his covered eye, can't h
elp but see the coat out of the corner of his field of vision...
Ms. Lachance: Depends on if it's any good.
I'm not handing our favours for cat piss.
Jaime: ...
Gabby just kinda strokes the fur idly, as if to comfort herself
Ed Stuart: fuck you jaime
Forrest: Hope it's in my budget.
Steph shifts in her sheet
Jaime: we're not even yet, ed
whoa, we have sheets?
Ms. Lachance: no
space is retarded
Steph seate
Ms. Lachance shrugs
Mac D.: she sits in her seath the scaleless
Space: its a late hour and im a fool..
Ms. Lachance: There, those were your words of the day.
Now, another bit of contrived shit. I mean stuff. I have to do with you are disc
ussion days,
I bring up a controversial issue and you talk about it.
Steph: ...
Jaime: ...
Steph hey
Ms. Lachance: So let's see.
Steph that's hell you're walking into
Ms. Lachance pulls out her phone and just looks something up on google
Gabby continues to look out of it
Space: she's high
Jaime drown in your ideals and die, lachance
Gabby: 8c
Space: high... on life
Ms. Lachance: Bam, legalize weed, go.
Space: and the narcotics crammed into that fur coat
Ms. Lachance: Gabby, you go first.
And pass it around popcorn-style.
Gabby hrrrrghhhhh MUST OPINION
Space: ah
they have popcorn in canada

eldritch s. (GM): what
Space: the educational method, 'popcorn'
Gabby: ...Frickin', um... Stoners are weird and gross, and if weed was legal, th
ey could do their dumb crap out in the open, and it'd suck really bad.
Fawkes M.: That sounds like something elementary school-ish
Space: they lack popcorn in california
Gabby sounds grumpy-despondent
Space: it is only in the North
Ms. Lachance: they have popcorn yes
Anyone want to debate that opinion?
Steph says nothing
Ms. Lachance: Going once.
Forrest: ....
Ms. Lachance: Going twice.
Jaime nada
Gabby coat-pet... pet the coat... nice coat...
Forrest: (sure why not)
Forrest raises his hand
Ms. Lachance: Freeman.
Steph looks at Forrest
Steph didn't know he was a stoner...
Forrest puts his hand dwon
Space: forrest is about to lay the smack down
Ms. Lachance: nameerf
Forrest: Being American, I don't know anything about the drug problem here in Ca
nada.
Space: put on some debate music
Jaime also does, if only to get ACCURSED COAT and HOT DATE out of his field of v
ision
Steph: ;)
Fawkes M.: What color is the coat?
Gabby this coat is your only real friend... you were a fool to think you should
have others...
Space: red, it's casters
Ms. Lachance: black
Space: no
it's
a coat of gold
Ms. Lachance: wrong house
Space: steph has a coat of red
Ms. Lachance: you fucking idiot
Space: seer, a lion still has claws
Fawkes M.: Reynes of Castamere
Forrest: But, scientifically speaking, the effects of Marijuana are no more detr
imental to the human body than legal drugs like tobacco, or alcohol, or caffeine
.
Ms. Lachance stops sipping her coffee for a second as he says that
Space: oh no
Gabby isn't really frickin' following

Ms. Lachance: You calling me a pothead?
Fawkes M.: Oh
Ms. Lachance resumes drinking
Forrest: No, Ma'am.
Fawkes M.: Rest in peace
Ms. Lachance: That's what I thought.
Forrest: Anyway, in America, possession of marijuana in many states can get you
thrown in prison, alongside violent felons and abusers of much more dangerous su
bstances.
Again, I don't know what it's like in Canada so I wouldn't know if that's a prob
lem here.
Vlad: It's about as retarded ass your country.
*as
Space: it's as retarded ass
Fawkes M.: Was that intentional?
Forrest: Okay, thanks.
Mobile L: I blame the accent
Vlad: no
but it was the accent
Forrest: Marijuana has also been show to be medically beneficial in easing pain
for sufferers of chronic illnesses such as glaucoma.
Ken silently nods along to this part
Gabby:
Space: ken's a fucking stoner
Gabby ah gahhhhhhd I'M A HORRIBLE PERSOOOOON
Jaime now looking over the jube jube to see if it has bruising or anything
Forrest: Legalizing and regulating it would also possibly aid in damaging the il
legal drug trade, as it isn't profitable to deal in something that is perfectly
attainable legally.
Narrator : It's a pristine jujube.
Gabby slow coat-receding
Ms. Lachance: That's good, new topic.
Jaime eh, maybe for lunch
Forrest: ....
Steph considers how she feels about this complex and multifaceted- oh
Ms. Lachance reads on her phone
Ms. Lachance: Abortion, bam, uh, Anton, whatever.
Anton: ...
Anton is clearly dismayed, knowing he'll put his foot in his mouth
Anton: Abortion... is...
Space: you can do it anton
Anton: Is when the lady, she get rid of fetus, yes?
Jaime looking over at Anton now
Mobile L: Poor anton
Anton is clearly not a native speaker
Anton: .... I guess is?
Forrest: ...Yeah, it is.
Anton: W- Oh, many thank yous.

Jaime looks back at Ms. Lachance
Fawkes M.: HOLD UP
I GOTTA MAKE ANOTHER CHRISTMASGRAM
Anton: I- it is, the Catholic Church, is not very approval of it, but it isMac D.: WRITE FAST BOY
Space: i can use this time to print my final draft
Anton: You look at it from, another spot, it shows another side, like a cube, an
d each of these... different looks, yes?
Forrest: ....
Anton: One side is black, other white, they both same cube, but opposite, uh....
idea.
I not know where I see it from, but know all sides.
Gabby is
Narrator
Winter's
Forrest:
.
hecka inside that coat now

: It's warm.
comin', though.
....Ms. Lachance, is English really the right class to be doing this in
Gabby yeah... probably gonna frickin freeze to death...

Narrator : https://youtu.be/PKZ0VNnAuiU?t=228
i'm just waiting
for the others
Fawkes M.: One Christmasgram down
One to go
Mac D.: U CAN DEW IT
Mobile L: MAKE YOUR CHRISTMAS DREAMS COME TRUE
Fawkes M.: Oh, on a side note I didn't get a C in that math class I was worried
about
Nor a D
So I'm happy
Mac D.: u did it meng
Mobile L: Eyyyyyy, nice!
Congrats, mah man
Fawkes M.: B)
I legit thought I tanked, too
Mac D.: christmasgram status
Mobile L: It hal https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/736x/87/d8/b9/87d8b94b3371
191e8a4dcb3cdae08822.jpg
Fawkes M.: Done, just waiting for the parent to evacuate the premises
Mac D.: aiight
SPESS disappeared to print some shit..
Fawkes M.: Damn essays
How many lives must they claim...?
Mac D.: santa save this damned souol
Fawkes M.: Must I do everything myself...?
(because i kinda sorta want to bring in arty claus)
(to the fg)
Mobile L: ARTY KLUASS
just like it was christmuss tiiiiiiiiiiiiIIIIIIIIIME
Fawkes M.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uvafvTnji-Y&t=2m
Space: congrats fox!
just gotta do one more thing and i'll be back
it'll be short so just start up
Mobile L: jeezus palpatine
Mac D.: oho
Fawkes M.: I'm still waiting for the parent to evacuate...
Mobile L: Does this mean he'll get a dance battle in the next Auralnauts Star Wa
rs video?
Fawkes M.: Eh, give him till VI
Mobile L: gad dammit why is it so hard to re-find Franz's faceclaim?
Fawkes M.: Can't you just google search for similar images or something when you
right-click?
Mobile L: Yeah, but it got made transparent in the Roll20 icon, so that kinda gu
ms it up
Lemme see if I've got it on my compy
Fawkes M.: Don't be like me
File your images
HOKAY premises are green
Space: let's get down to business
to defeat
the huns
Fawkes M.: Slay Attila
Mac D.: alright let's MOSEY
Fawkes M.: It's on you, Seer
Mobile L: YEHHHHH
Mac D.: .........seer are
are you alive
Mobile L: AHA I FOUND THE LITTLE FUCKER http://4.bp.blogspot.com/-lQ1zMjmw_Bs/UD
kIc7HrIxI/AAAAAAAAAgM/90Vr7FGzoLY/s640/personajesp.jpg
Space: sharp
Mobile L: Imma make Olive draw both Glazkov bros
Fawkes M.: I wonder how Olive is gonna assemble Assassin
I gave him to her in LEGO pieces
Space: glue
Mobile L: no franz what are you doing http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-_LxrNM4B-Qk/UVQm
wM977BI/AAAAAAAAAi0/zyFQWoxjmrk/s1600/prueba+ilustracio%CC%81n_comic.jpg
Fawkes M.: She's a Bionicle, she doesn't need glue
Oh shit
Space: franz is tired of [some kid]'s bs
Mobile L: That's a fucking knife, that damn kid must've done some bad shit
Fawkes M.: I'm controlling the Rabbit if you guys wanna wait
Mobile L: Ooh, hell yeah
Space: i'm on me way
Fawkes M.: https://rabb.it/thespacephantom
Just because Space does it all the time
Space: it's bizarre to be without
power
Narrator : eheheh
Mobile L: ELDY MY BOY YOU'RE ALIVE
Space: he lives, he breathes
Narrator : i was watching the first part of minions
Fawkes M.: How was it?
Narrator : i actually am impressed
it's got a lot of charm
Mobile L: Well damn
Fawkes M.: Huh, I thought it was a cash in
Mobile L: I wouldn't have guessed
Narrator : it's better than what i expected
Fawkes M.: Wanna watch Arthur while waiting for Duff?
Narrator : nah
Mac D.: AHA
Fawkes M.: Oh, hey, there he is
Narrator : anyway, abortion
Mac D.: this is what i get for leaving to go snack on hot cheetos
Ms. Lachance: I don't make the rules.
Forrest: ...
Ms. Lachance: Does anyone have a real opinion?
Steph raises her hand

Jaime: .....
Ms. Lachance: Steph.
Gabby was an unwanted baby herself and is conflicted
Mac D.: oh
oh dear poor gabby
Gabby is also too beat down to say anything
Jaime also conflicted about Terry and their mother
Steph: It should be up to the mother, because they're going to be the ones going
through with it.
Steph is not conflicted about parenthood
Forrest wishes he was aborted
Mobile L: Ask her about the renaissance faire in Quebec
Steph the one time dead parents have a perk
Jaime clearly Steph does not know about Batman
Ms. Lachance: What about the father?
Steph: Well, he's not going to be giving birth.
Ms. Lachance: His kid too.
Gabby:
Gabby aaaaaaaaaa frickin' KILL ME
Forrest: He might also not be able to fincancially support a family.
Steph: ...
Space: where is gab's mother anyways
Ms. Lachance shrugs
Ms. Lachance: quebec
Jaime not willing to say anything regarding Johann
Space: good riddance
Mobile L: Probably smoking weed and fucking other nerds
Forrest: It's a complex topic. One I don't think is suited for an English class.
Ms. Lachance shrugs
Ms. Lachance: Still not my decision.
Ms. Lachance reads on her phone again
Steph: ...
Steph giving out opinions is Bad
Gabby recedes yet further into the warm confines of the coat
Ms. Lachance: ... Fugh, uh, the death penalty in the United States, Jasper, go.
Jasper: Let them do it.
It's not my concern.
Jaime: ...
Steph: ...
Ms. Lachance: Thanks, Charles Manson.
Jaime ain't the Murrican here
Steph yeah that's about right for jasper

Ms. Lachance: Anyone else?
Forrest: Is the legal policy of a foreign country really worth discussing in an
EnglMs. Lachance: englMac D.: this is the part where he gets cut off
Ms. Lachance: by who
Mac D.: i dunno i was expecting lachance
Steph: objection
Ms. Lachance: Alright, now you're starting to piss me off.
Forrest: ....
Ms. Lachance: Last time, it's not my decision.
I don't want to do this.
I just want you kids to shut up and read a book.
But I have to do this, it's mandatory.
Forrest: Who decided this, the school board.
Ms. Lachance: You think I just woke up and said, Jesus, why don't I make a bunch
of teenager murmur about abortion, that sounds like fun?
Yes the school board!
Steph: .....
Jaime: .....
Gabby tiny sigh
Ms. Lachance: I mean, Jesus Christ, I hate this!
Forrest: .....
Forrest sheesh lady
Ms. Lachance: I just want to get on with my life, but we have to keep going on w
ith this stupid fucking nonsense!
It's a new ring every fucking day with goddamn pieces of shit!
Ms. Lachance is starting to get really pissed off
Steph: ..................
Forrest: .....
Forrest checks the clock
Ms. Lachance: You think you could just work for a living but no nononono! You ha
ve to do hippity hops through a fucking ring and say uncle!
1-4 marking system, what a load of utter fucking bullshit!
Mobile L: BRB, dishes
Ms. Lachance keeps ranting, it's nearly at the end of class
Jaime: .....
Jaime gonna wait it out, guys?
Forrest: .....Ma'am.
Ms. Lachance: And then I have to deal with kids treating me like the fucking idi
ot for this shit, you think I have a choice!?
WHAT!?
Forrest: ....What brand of coffee do you like.
Ms. Lachance: ...
Fawkes M.: Hang on, I'm trying to exorcise Space
Space: Jar jar
Ms. Lachance: Folgers.
Forrest: Alright.
Jaime: ...
Ms. Lachance: But I have my own brew that I don't think you can beat.
... Tell you waht.
*what
You bring me better stuff than what I'm drinking now.

I'll make sure the whole class passes this course.
Fawkes M.: Hang on, this exorcism shit is taking ages
Forrest: Deal.
Space: ;)
eldritch s. (GM): space stop it you dickhead
Mac D.: are you trying to pull space out of the rabbit
Space: very well
Mac D.: space get back here and stop avoiding your responsibilities
Ms. Lachance chugs her cup
Steph has
Steph no idea how forrest did that
Ms. Lachance checks her watc
Ms. Lachance: ... 'M gonna get some chips.
Forrest: ...
Nathan: ... I've never seen her so mad.
Steph: ...
Forrest: ...Anyone here know anything about making coffee.
Nathan: ... Except the time Mr. Hawthorne gave her that girdle in class...
Steph: I do!
Forrest: Oh, good.
Job's on you.
Suzie: Don't talk about the girdle.
Steph: ...Wait, why do I have to get the coffee?
Vlad: Get her the coffee.
I want to pass.
Steph: ...
Steph opening your mouth, in any situation, is a mistake
Jaime looks over at Forrest
Jasper: ...
Jaime: Why ask for someone who knows how to make coffee? That's different from g
etting the beans.
Jasper: You're not going to get her the coffee, are you?
Steph: I -- guess I have to?
Jasper: Peh.
Steph: What, why do you ask?
Jasper: Why ask anything? I wanted to know the answer.
Or at least what you'd tell me.
Jaime is now wondering if Johann's got some fancy imported coffee beans back at
the Red House
Forrest: She talked about having her own brew.
Whatever the hell that is.
Steph: Okay, I guess?
Jasper: You guess an awful not.
*lot
Jaime: Wait - that involves making your beans, right?
Forrest: We don't beat that, we don't automatically pass.
And I have no idea how to make coffee, so.
Gabby is still quiet and sad
Jaime: Or, growing them.
Mac D.: hahaha fucccck my internet

Forrest: Idunno, it might.
Depends on what she puts in hers.
Steph: That's just a thing I say a lot.
Jaime: ...
Jaime remembering...!
Jasper watches her for a second
Jasper turns back to her shit
Gabby:
Steph: ...
Lilly looks at Gabby out of the corner of her eye
Steph 'fuck's sake,' she thinks
Jaime not to anyone in particular
Jaime: ...How do you make good coffee beans better?
Forrest shrugs
Forrest: Maybe there's a book.
eldritch s. (GM): "you SHIT on them"
Space: there is like an expensive kind of coffee
eldritch s. (GM): made of shit
i know
Space: where jungle cats eat the beans and then crap them out
Fawkes M.: Aren't there actually coffee beans like that, which get eaten and the
n shat out?
Yeah
Gabby looks back at Lilly, uncharacteristically apologetic
Gabby:
eldritch s. (GM): lancaster
eat the beans
Jaime: and shit golden beans, i get it
eldritch s. (GM): you eat. you eat of the beans of the inca people
Jaime: heard that a thousand times
Lilly mouthes "It's okay."
Forrest: Good thing this town has a ton of libraries for whatever reason.
Mac D.: SHIT CONNECTION'S BACK, BAY BEEEEEEEEEEE
Narrator : NEXT CLASS IS COME
Jaime: Or, the internet, right?
Forrest: That works too.
Gabby:
Narrator : It is now Information Processing (Computers)
Gabby sniffles a bit and nods
Steph: ............
Ms. Guildenstern: Class, class, hello!
Forrest: ...
Jaime: .....
Ms. Guildenstern: I've got some news for you!
Forrest the face
Ms. Guildenstern: The computers are working again.!
So follow me, and we'll get started on the first project of the year.
I love this one, it's great!
Forrest: .....
Ms. Guildenstern: C'mon!
Forrest geeeets up and goooooes
Steph gathers up her stuff, following the omp teach
Jaime are the computers in front of them
Ms. Guildenstern: no
Jaime oh
Gabby:
Gabby sullenly trudges after, not looking up
Dr. Hall is reading a book
Gabby FFFFFRRRRRiiiiiick........
Forrest looks around
Dr. Hall: Oh, I didn't know there would be a class.
My apologies, I will be getting out of your hair....
Forrest looks over at Mr. Hawthorned
(From Jaime): I'm listening, just in a different tab
Jaime sonuva....
Steph: ...
Forrest: .....
Forrest ....he looks old
Forrest .....maybe HE knows something about....
Steph already just wants this day to e n d
Mac D.: AH HCHEM
Space: where they
Gabby GOOD... THANK FRICK HE'S GONE... not like it matters...
Space: i'll draw a dick in every square in this hallway until he returns
Fawkes M.: You missed about four or five
Space: 3x3
Fawkes M.: Sure, sure
Space: not every tile, every square on the game grid
Fawkes M.: Sure, Jan
Space: they just
steadily
get more and more
deformed
and horrible
Fawkes M.: This is the progression of Jason's dick
Until
It just crumbled away
Mobile L: Frrrrrrgh, I'mma have to sleep soon, too
As always, though, I can catch uhp
Space: draw dicks in these last few moments
Fawkes M.: So is Brandon still active in the Fate chat?
Mobile L: Nah, I think he died
Space: no he's been gone for ages
Fawkes M.: Good
Mobile L: They stoned him to death

Fawkes M.: So we can make all the FGO Jason jokes we want
And the Brandon Jason jokes, too
Dr. Hall: i had to recieve affection from my family
Space: i drew dicks while you were gone
Mobile L: awww
JAYSON
Mr. Hawthorne nods and ducks out
Forrest ...gah-shiet.
Forrest: ....
Ms. Guildenstern: Right, did everyone bring their phone to school to day?
Forrest looks back at Ms. Guildenstern
Space: according to my calculations
that's 69 dicks i drew
Forrest: ....I did.
Space: not even joking
23 sets of 3
Jaime: lol
Gabby nod nod... hrrrghhhh...
Ms. Guildenstern: Good, because this next project requires filming~
Jaime nods, just once again
Steph gets her cellular device out
Ms. Guildenstern: I'm going to seperate you into groups...
Uhm...
Forrest: ...
Ms. Guildenstern: Jaime, Forrest, Ken...
Forrest looks at his partners-in crime
Ms. Guildenstern: Hrm...
Steph, Gabby, Jason...
Jaime looks back at the looking pardners
Steph this is okay
Steph this is fine
Ms. Guildenstern: Vlad, Suzie, Jasper.
Steph: Hey, guys!
Fawkes M.: So sorry, Steph and Gabby
Gabby looks very wilted today, Steph
Ms. Guildenstern: Hm...
Gabby: ...Hey...
Steph ...motherfuck
Jaime waiting to hear what this projection will be first
Ms. Guildenstern: Lilly, go with Gabby's group, Nathan, with the man group.
Forrest: The Man Group.
Ms. Guildenstern shrugs
Ms. Guildenstern: Best shorthand I could think up
Forrest: ...Well, at least it's not the Boy Group
Ms. Guildenstern: Alright...
Gabby come to think of it, wasn't she on the verge of crying her eyes out when l
ast you saw her?
Ms. Guildenstern: That's good thinking, Forrest, right?
Steph: ...
Steph motherfuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck.
Forrest: ....
Steph this is a bad place to comfort the small one
Jaime: ...What about the Male Group?
Ms. Guildenstern: Now, uh... You'll all be making a little- sure.
Gabby pulls that fricking coat tighter around herself
Ms. Guildenstern: The Male Group.
Forrest: I prefered Man Group.
Ms. Guildenstern: Now, uh, you'll all be working together to make iMovies.
Steph: (...That's, uh... that's a nice... coat?)
Ms. Guildenstern: I'll leave what its content will be up to you, but it needs to
be five minutes.
Gabby: (...Thanks...)
Space: had to do this exact thing earlier this year
Forrest: ....
Ms. Guildenstern: Film horizontally with your phones, not vertically.
Jaime: Right.
Forrest: Alright.
Ms. Guildenstern: Uh, so you can spend this class planning, and if you have some
thing cooked up, that's great.
Remember, have fun.
Forrest: Is the assignment due today.
Ms. Guildenstern: Oh, no.
Jaime oh good
Ms. Guildenstern: I'll give you...
Ms. Guildenstern counts on her fingers
Ms. Guildenstern: Two more classes.
Jaime oh not good
Ms. Guildenstern: And then one more to edit.
Steph: ...So! Do we got any ideas?
Ms. Guildenstern: So three more.
Jaime: ...Got it.
Gabby: ...Uh... Frick. I dunno.
Ms. Guildenstern: I can extend the deadline if we need to, don't be afraid to ta
lk to me.
Forrest: ....That's three more of these classes, right.
Ms. Guildenstern: Yes.
Forrest: Alright.
Lilly: ...
Forrest looks at is group
Forrest: O-kay. Let's make a movie.
Nathan: Zombies!
Steph: 'Cause, uh... I don't.
Jaime: Won't that require makeup, Nathan?
Jason: ... We could make... no, never mind...
Forrest: Besides, everyone and their mother has done Zombies.
Gabby: ...Eh?
Nathan: ... Oh...

Mobile L: Damnation, I think I need to go. Orientation is tomorrow
Forrest: Any other ideas.
Jason: go
Mac D.: rest
Fawkes M.: bai bai
Mobile L: I can ketchup later on. G'night, dawgs
Anton: ... A mystery murder?
Space: fare whale
Forrest: Alright, we could make that work.
Steph: Um... I mean, there's no bad ideas when we don't have any ideas to begin
with.
Jaime glances over at the other group for a brief moment
Jaime: We have any other ideas?
Forrest looks at Jaime and Ken
Forrest: What about you two.
Ken: I like the idea of a murder mystery.
Jaime: What about a... martial arts film?
Forrest: .....
Jason: We... mrm...
Forrest: ....Do you know martial arts.
Jaime: Do you think the guys in the movies do?
Lilly: ... A parody of a movie?
Forrest: Yes.
Steph: Sure!
What movie?
Anton: They have men with stunts!
Jaime: I don't know, as long as we pretend to do acrobatics or something, it cou
ld work.
Jason: How about the Shining?
Steph: This works!
Forrest: It would have to look sufficiently convincing, and I doubt we have the
capacity to do that with a phone.
Jason: Who's, hm, who's going to be who...?
Jaime: ...Fine.
Nathan: ... A zombie murder myste- no, WEREWOLF murder mystery!
Forrest looks at Nathan
Forrest: ...
Jaime: ...
...That's not a bad idea.
Steph: Um...
Forrest: ...We just talked about how we don't have the makeup for that kind of t
hing.
Steph: I dunno, which of us is the most axe-murder-y?
Anton: He is team Jacob, yes?
Forrest: Unless one of you has a werewolf costume.
Anton chuckles
Jaime: Well, um...
Jaime: We can just make the werewolf offscreen.
And dead, right?
Ken: It doesn't have to be professional, does it?
Lilly: ...
I don't know...
Jaime: No, of course not. We've got three or so days.
Forrest: ...Okay, so what we have is a werewolf murder mystery where the werewol
f is never actually seen and is killed offscreen.
Jaime: By... a vampire.
Anton: If we just say is werewolf, yes, and kill when human, it work!
Imagine like this...
Anton begins drawing a diagram
Steph: Um...
Forrest: ....
Steph looks around uncertainly
Jaime: ...
You don't want something that's been done before, right?
Forrest: Yes, but "different" doesn't always mean "better"
Anton beams
Jaime: Fine, what's another way to have a dead werewolf? Anton?
Forrest: I mean, if we're not going to show a werewolf at all, then why don't we
just make it a normal murder mystery.
Anton: Uh...
Jason: rolling 1d20
(
3
)
= 3
Jaime looks over at the diagram
Narrator : Gabby.
She's going to be your ax-murderer.
Fawkes M.: Frick yeah
Narrator : that's the diagram
Forrest looks at it
Fawkes M.: Wait, what is
Narrator : zoom out
Steph: ...Okay, great!
Forrest: ....Okay, I get it. But that doesn't change the fact that having the we
rewolf never actually appear makes the whole werewolf angel pointless.
Jaime: I think we can use this.
Jaime turns to Forrest
Forrest: *angle
Jaime: Well - what I'm trying to go for is that the victim isn't innocent.
Ken: It provides an excuse for there not being a murder weapong.
Forrest: ...Uh.
Lilly: ...
Jaime: ...I don't know, that's new, right?
Lilly: Has anyone here seen the Shining...?
Jaime juuust a tad defensively
{(
4
+
3
+
9
)}
= 4
Lilly: no you have not
Steph: Um...
Lilly: ... Que Sera, Sera, right?
We'll make it up as we go along!
Forrest: But how does that necessitate the whole werewolf thing.
Jaime: Well, it's just one idea.
Forrest: I mean, if we want to lack a murder weapon, we could just say the guy w
as killed with bare hands.
Jaime: Got any others?
Forrest: That's scary, right. A dude strong enough to murder with bare hands.
Nathan: ... A movie about DRUGS!
Steph: Yeah, there we go!
Forrest: ....
Nathan is innocent
Forrest: ....
Jaime: ...Where the man who was killed was a drug lord, right?
Jason: The guy was a writer, wasn't he...
Gabby's a writer...
Forrest: ........I can work with this.
Jason: And her family's coming...
Jaime nods
Jaime: There we go.
Forrest: Okay, how about this.
Narrator : this is your time steph
just rewrite the shining
you have the iconic scene in mind
Steph: ...
Narrator : *scene(s)
{(
14
+
16
+
10
)}
= 14
Narrator : no space
Forrest: The murderer is some junkie addicted to a drug that makes you super str
ong, and he kills his dealer with his bare hands while high on the drug.
Narrator : i'm not rewriting it for oyu
you do
Space: i was rolling to see how good it is
Jaime nods as he listens to Forrest
Ken nods along
Forrest: That way, we can have a monster-like killer, and actually show him on v
ideo.
Steph: ...They're... coming to visit for Christmas? But Gabby, she hates Christm
as, because she's a grouch.
Jaime: Who's gonna be our killer?
Forrest: Who among us looks the most likely to kill a man.
Ken: ...
Forrest: ...
Jaime: ...
Nathan: Me!
Jaime: ...I could do iForrest looks at Nathan
Nathan looks buff
Jaime turns over to Nathan
Steph: Um... so she, uh... she doesn't like that, so she... goes crazy?
Forrest: ....Yeah, I guess you could pull it off.
Jaime: Which of us looks the most like a drug dealer?
Ken: ... Who are the hero...
Forrest: Yes, I'll do it.
Lilly: Yeah, I think so.
Jaime nods
Forrest: That way I can lie on the ground and not exert effort.
Jaime this is good, he thinks
Forrest: Okay so who are the other characters in this movie
Lilly: She starts smashing up the Christmas decorations, how about? And tries ki
lling us because she thinks we're Santa's elves....
Jaime: Just the heroes. Right, Ken?
Ken nods
Steph: Yeah! And, uh...
Anton: I be could a witness or victim.
Steph is going off of her half-remembered knowledge of this film from popcultura
l osmosis
Forrest: The killer should off at least one other guy in the movie
Jaime: ...Hmm.
Steph: ...They, uh... wouldn't let us go at a door with an axe, would they?
Jaime looks over at Anton
Forrest looks at Anton
Forrest: You feel like dying.
Anton: Ehe, sure enough.
Steph: Maybe she tries, but... it doesn't work? 'Cause she's so short. Um... no
offense, Gabby.
Forrest: Good. Alright, how about you two.
Forrest looks at Jaime and Ken
Jason: She just opens the door.
Steph: Yeah!
Jason: It wasn't even locked.
Jaime: I guess that makes us the two who make it to the end?
Ken: I suppose so.
Steph: So, when she gets in there, uh...
Forrest: So what are your roles.
Jaime: One of us should be another dealer, right?
Since it means we might know about the drug.
Lilly: ... Someone teaches her the meaning of Christmas?
Forrest: You could also work for the Narcotics division of a precinct.
Ken: I like the sound of being a police officer.
Steph: We hand her Christmas presents?
Ken for Duff's reference, is just the mellowest guy there is
Jaime: Which means that we have to work together despite being enemies.
Forrest: Okay, so we have a plot.
Nathan's crazed junkie hopped up on-.....
Jason: Sure.
Forrest: ...What are we calling the drug.
Jaime: rolling 1d20
(
18
)
= 18
Steph: Okay, good!
Jaime: tbh i was expecting a 3 so i could come up with a shitty name
Narrator : i'll give you a shitty name
Jaime: thanks
Narrator : Scrote.
Jaime: ...Croat...ium?
Croatium.
Lilly: This sounds like a solid movie!
Steph: That was easier than I thought... do we have enough time to start on it?
Forrest: Okay. So Nathan's high as fuck on Croatium and kills me, his dealer.
Lilly checks her fancy watch
Lilly: Sadly not.
Narrator : could the groups write down their movie plots in their notes so i don
't forget
and the deadline too
Fawkes M.: Jaime dun have a book
Forrest: Ken, the cop, is investigating the scene of my murder and discovers a l
ead that points to drugs.
Fawkes M.: It's on you, Duff
Forrest: At some point, Nathan murders, uh.....What's your name?
Anton: Anton!
Forrest: Anton, got it. So Nathan murders Anton.
Ken tracks down Jaime, another dealer, in some abandoned building or whatever, a
nd shakes him down for information on the drug.
Jaime nods
Forrest: Then they end up trapped in the building and hunted by the killer and t
hey have to escape.
After a bit of that, Ken brings down Nathan. Jaime may or may not die by then.
There we go.
Jaime: ...Wait. Shouldn't I know about like a weakness in the drug?
Meaning I could work on the takedown.
Steph: Well, that's fine with me, anyways.
Forrest: You could tell Ken about it before Nathan kills you.
Jaime: Why am I dying, again?
Nathan: 'Cause people die when they're killed.
Forrest: To make the situation more tense.
You're being hunted by the killer in an abandoned building after all.
Jaime: So, then, why don't we end it in a cliffhanger?
They don't know if we got killed, so they won't know if we died.
Forrest: We'll see if that meets the five minute mark.
Narrator : how's steph doing
Jaime: It'll be less footage.
Steph: i said a thing
Forrest: But it's gotta be at least five minutes.
Narrator : i know she did
Jaime: I still think it will. We just have to not skimp on the other parts.
Jason nods
Forrest: We'll see when we start filming.
Jaime: Yeah.
Narrator : The bell goes.
Forrest looks up
Forrest: ...Alright, good. We got something.
Steph is already longing for escape from this hellish blight called 'high school
'
Narrator : Your next class is Drama
we'll do it tomorrow
Mac D.: is....is it over......?
Steph: im-prov
Fawkes M.: TSUGI NI KURASU DA
I remember our first sesh
Mac D.: everyone is violently thrown into the lunchroom
Fawkes M.: Jaime passed out there
In drama
Space: the chicken
that fucking devil bird
stephanie karloman is the skilled at legalism
Mac D.: steph and forrest have a courtroom duel
Space: steph had one with dr. hall
to defend jaime
Fawkes M.: Jaime actually picked Steph as his lawyer because he choked her
Mac D.: jaime why did you try to murder steph
Space: chicken psychosis
Fawkes M.: He was driven nuts by the devil bird
Narrator : you know if all of oyu feel up to it we woulc work a bit on drama
Mac D.: _that vile creature_
Space: hall got really mad
Fawkes M.: I'd wait for Mobile
Space: and into it
Mac D.: i'd wait for mobile to start a new class but i would absolutley love to
keep playing somehow else plz
Space: love this roll20
Narrator : there is no other way
Space: i agree to wait for mob
Mac D.: it's not FAIR....
Narrator : your drama teacher
look
he's gendo
Space: he's a good man
Fawkes M.: Duff confirmed for our collective abusive boyfriend
Space: he hid evidence to help the court case
Fawkes M.: Oh, yes
The tapes
Space: good guy
he has a crush on the IT teacher
Fawkes M.: Jaime still has the coffee beans
Mac D.: man i wish a was around
Space: https://rabb.it/thespacephantom
Mac D.: we're all good for tomorrow right
just CHECKIN TO BE SURE
Fawkes M.: It's likely
Narrator : or adeva or whatever
Fawkes M.: Wednesday, though, imma STUR WHURZ
Space: tomorrow i gotta go to bed early, but besides that yes

Fawkes M.: Personally, I wanna do a true Hollow Night sesh
Narrator : i'll whurz your stur
Fawkes M.: It's been a long time
Mac D.: hey space
wanna hear forrest's pursuit theme
Space: i heard it
Mac D.: oh ok
MY FRIEND
....my friend?
Jaime yep yep
Forrest yyyyehup
Gabby mhm
Gabby sips beer
Mr. Rosencrantz YES
Steph in finnish they say hoi instead of hello
Mac D.: steph: bill dauterive crying
Mobile L: it is at this time that I realize I never recapped self
Mac D.: ALOW ME
Steph: do the reads
i lied, allow the duff actualy
Mac D.: the class was dragged into the library and their computer project was to
create a five minute short film with their phones in three days
Team MAN MAYONNAISE, consisting of the Four Sexiest Men in Belmont
intricately crafted a murder-mystery story about the evils of a strength-boostin
g super drug
Team CINCINNATTI WRONGS, consisting of Steph, Gabby, and two people who don't ma
tter
created a Christmas Horror Story where gabby was the axe-murderer who learns the
true meaning of chritsmans
Mobile L: Oh jeezus
That's sugoii
As per usual lately, I will need to leave by 12:00
Steph: i'm getting up a like 5 am tomorrow but i can just sleep on the plane
Mobile L: I hope you're good at that
Mac D.: plane naps are siimple
you just don't think about how you could die in a plane crash without ever reali
zin
g
Steph: planes are safer than cars
Mobile L: I was about to say
Mac D.: this is true
Mobile L: ffffffruck, I think I'll just FG in the interim
Wat is goin awn in that bitch?
Mac D.: there's a Zoro lost in the woods at the moment
an Arty Claus about to plunge the world into Holiday cheer
various other things i didn't pay attention to
and ram whining as usual
Mobile L: Ah, normalcy
A'ight, lemme finalize my ideas/maybe take the disc off the watchlist to evade R
am's inevitable "GRAAAARGH"
I like that kid, but maaaaaan
Steph: 4 mintues until my political simulator is ready
trip is a good person
Mac D.: he really is

he tries so hard
Steph: he's shirou, he knows that his ideal's not wrong
Mobile L: An honorable young man.
Then who is EMIYA?
Steph: duff
Mobile L: No, Duff is Iskandar
Steph: oh then its me
Mac D.: no actually i'm gaius julius casear
Steph: i can believe it
Mac D.: he has incitement EX
Mobile L: Once Taft becomes a Servanto, that will also be you
pls Rider!JFK and Assassin!Oswald someday..........
Mac D.: Incitement EX.gif
https://media.giphy.com/media/oidPWOqPgEnw4/giphy.gif
Mobile L: Majestic
Steph: noble phantasm = magic bullet
Mac D.: back
and to the left
Space: know who else
Mac D.: back
and to the left
Space: is a rider-class servant
Mac D.: back
and to the left
Space: related to jfk
marilyn monroe :^)
https://youtu.be/HkiMz-e2ZcE
ok im gonna go run for political office now
Mac D.: airhorn.mp3
marilyn monroe is JFK's noble phantasm :^)
Space: :^) :^) :^)
Mobile L: ohhhhhh snap
Mac D.: and then there were two....
Mobile L: Dos
Mac D.: quick let's make a mess while they're gone
behold
Megadong
Mobile L: The dongest
And longest
Mac D.: witness and despair
the might
the MAJESTY
Mobile L: The eighth wonder of the world
Mac D.: the children will not survive
Fawkes M.: Okay, I'm back, and may or may not have a more damaged relationship w
ith parents now
AH WELL
Mobile L: Shit
Fawkes M.: Eh, doesn't matter
Mac D.: seer remains stuck in the hole and space is running for president
Mobile L: Should we Rabbit or some shit in the meantime?
Mac D.: rabbit never works for me un-fortunately
Mobile L: Taima?
Mac D.: these NERDS will never touch taima again...
Mobile L: Damn... We could always camp out here and draw other phalluses
Mac D.: i have confirmation that seer crawled his way out of the whole
hole
the whole hole
Mobile L: The entire ladyhole
It is his birthday, after all

Fawkes M.: Yeah
Lots of presents and festivities
Mobile L: And emerging from dark places and screaming
Mac D.: there is no presents in the hole
seer you smell of swamp
Mobile L: But where is Espiritu del Espacio
Fawkes M.: Probably packing?
Mac D.: oh no he's running for President i told you
someone scream at him on steam the boy ain't paying attention to skype
Mobile L: he comes
Space: http://i.snag.gy/uTe4e.jpg
i'm ready to lead
Mobile L: Are you a tiny, blonde Dubya
Space: yea
Mobile L: Gahd dehmn
Space: getting that hat at that jaunty angle was the toughest part
Mobile L: Jaunt does not come easy
Space: added to the donger pile
Mac D.: ah good Mister President has arrived
Space: everyone's vanished at the promised hour
Fawkes M.: I'm here
I think Seer is just eating about ten more pounds of pound cake
Mobile L: And washing it down with hooch and maple syrup
eldritch s. (GM): i nearly dropped my computer, spilled a glass of water twice
Space: jesus
Mobile L: Oy vey
Mac D.: deep breaths brother
eldritch s. (GM): and then people got passive aggressive at me because i did so
it's fine
whatever
i have my cake
Fawkes M.: So I've got Force Awakens tomorrow, but do you guys still want to Rol
l then?
Mac D.: i have no engagements that day
Mobile L: If we can HN, pls let us HN
Fawkes M.: I mean, I'd rather watch the movie, but I'm just wondering
Space: could you not
Fawkes M.: Alright
Sorry
Mr. Rosencrantz: i see no point in doing this if this is how it's going to be
Fawkes M.: Look, I'm sorr
y
I won't do it again
Mobile L: I understand about having engagements and things. I have that shit all
the time. People are generally understanding about it, right?
Fawkes M.: I want to Roll tonight, really
eldritch s. (GM): alright
Fawkes M.: Sorry, again
eldritch s. (GM): it's fine
Mobile L: 'S fine. Just please, seriously, have a filter. It
*It's your choice what you say and don't say, and you can phrase your concerns i
n a civil manner.
Mr. Rosencrantz: i'm just going to subject you to ocanada in jazz form for ten y
ears
Mr. Rosencrantz begins teaching the class, opening his arm
Mr. Rosencrantz: s
Mobile L: Muzak
Mr. Rosencrantz: not his singular arm
Space: he just takes it and opens it up

Gabby: mister rosencrantz are you okay after the accident
Steph is quietly ready for acting
Jaime: man, he panicked too much
all he lost was his left arm
Mr. Rosencrantz: Now, in light of, uh...
Mr. Rosencrantz clears his throat
Forrest has never drama'd before
Gabby is still down in the mouth and doubts even pretending to be crazy Texan sa
lespeople will cheer her up
Mr. Rosencrantz: The, ehm, disappearence, of one of our dear students...
Steph: ...
Steph is quietly not ready for this at all
Forrest: ,,,,
Mr. Rosencrantz: It seems in poor taste to continue with practices for Utopia, a
Play in Two Acts.
Jaime: ...
Mr. Rosencrantz: So, eh.
Gabby:
Mr. Rosencrantz: We'll just do Improv.
Steph: ...
Mr. Rosencrantz: Alright, who would like to step up to the plate?
Steph you can save her
Gabby noooo... noooooooo...
Steph you can still save her
Mr. Rosencrantz: C'mon, going once, going twice!
Forrest: ......
Steph you have to remember that, is what she tells herself
Mr. Rosencrantz: ...
Going three times!
Mr. Rosencrantz sighs
Forrest would rather NOT do anything in front of an audience
Forrest: .....
Jaime neither, not again
Mr. Rosencrantz: Sold to the the man with the nice hair!
Mr. Rosencrantz points at Jaime
Jaime ...oh
Jaime: Alright...
Jaime gets up
Mr. Rosencrantz: Now, you are the Party Host!
It is your job to host the party and figure out who your three guests are.
Gabby is now sad AND worried for Jaime's safety again... caring really hurts...
Mr. Rosencrantz: Please leave the room while we pick the guests.
Mac D.: oh my god is every drama class an episode of whose line is it anyway
Jaime nods
Jaime: Got it.
Space: ~improv~
Mac D.: I LOVE
Mr. Rosencrantz: this is how my drama teacher ran it
she was great
Space: we just do rehearsals
Fawkes M.: Should
Should I leave to enforce method acting?
Mr. Rosencrantz: Alright, do we have any volunteers for the Guests?
yeah
Fawkes M.: Like, if I knw who it is
Mr. Rosencrantz: get the FUCK YOUR
Fawkes M.: Got it
Space: put your hands over your eyes
Fawkes M.: Skype me
When you need me
Mr. Rosencrantz: i will
Space: no i will
i'm powerful
Mr. Rosencrantz: fuck you space
alright
Space: i'm power and might
Mobile L: Immersion
Mr. Rosencrantz raises his hands
Forrest: ....
Mr. Rosencrantz: C'MON!
Volunteers!
Come at me!
Steph reluctantly raises a hand
Forrest: .......................................
Mr. Rosencrantz: Steph, THAT'S THE STUFF!
Gabby: :,c
Forrest ain't doin' it......aaaaaaain't DOIN IT
Space: he's an excited man
Steph: (... yeah... the stuff)
(your friend is dead and you were reminded of it)
Mr. Rosencrantz: C'mon!
Forrest AIIIIIIIIIIIIN'T DOIN IT
Steph mrs fuggin doom and gloom over here
Narrator : roll spirit to withstand mr rosencrantz
(
11
+
15
+
1
)-1
= 26
Narrator : Forrest.
Forrest: oh wait
Narrator : The man.
Space: tens
Narrator : He's bending your will.

Forrest: sorry my minus one was in finesse not spirit
Narrator : oh
Forrest: have him pick me anyway
Narrator : But he didn't bend it enough.
But you feel the pull.
Forrest: ....
Narrator : hey gabby
Space: what if rosencrantz was the guy with the magic abilities all along
Narrator : roll the dice
Space: and hall was just some asshole
{(
10
+
12
+
16
)}+0
= 12
Narrator : Gabby, the coat protects you.
Space: winter's comin
Gabby bless u sacred coat........
Narrator : rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Spirit
{(
13
+
15
+
3
)}+1
= 14
rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + for Spirit
{(
6
+
13
+
2
)}
= 6
{(
16
+
19
+
9
)}+1
= 17
Nathan's hand fucking BOLTS up.
Nathan: Me!
Mr. Rosencrantz: Good!
Space: forrest eyes warily
Forrest stands steadfast against this sinister man's mind control
Mr. Rosencrantz: And our final Guest...
1 is forrest
2 is gabby
3 is lilly
actually
no
Mr. Rosencrantz: either forrest or gabby
Mac D.: 3 is forrest again
Mr. Rosencrantz: and 4 is gabby again
rolling 1d4
(
1
)
= 1
Freeeeeeeeeeman!
Space: it is declared
Forrest: ......
Forrest oh for fucks sake
Mr. Rosencrantz: You are our third guest!
All the none guests, to the side of the room!
Forrest exhales in irritation
Steph: steal my chair will you
Mr. Rosencrantz: Now, we must decide WHO our guests are...
Forrest: ....
Gabby bless u coat...
Suzie: Sorry.
Steph: ...
Mr. Rosencrantz: Any ideas?
Steph is in not much of a mood to come up with stuff
Steph thinks
Mr. Rosencrantz: May we get suggestions from our audience?
Forrest is wearing his "i really wish i weren't here right now" button
Mr. Rosencrantz: Gabby, any ideas?
Gabby: ...Uhhhh... Frickin'... Maybe Steph could be, a... frickin'... physicist
or something...?
Mr. Rosencrantz: How's that sound, Steph?
Gabby yehhh, gonna self-indulge this the frick up, I FEEL HORRID AND NEED IT
Steph: Sure.
Mr. Rosencrantz: A crazy physcist.
Steph: How crazy?
Mr. Rosencrantz: Alright, now...
Gabby BE THE PHYSICIST I WISH I WAS
Mr. Rosencrantz: Super crazy!
The kind of crazy who would buy a timeshare in Tijuana.
Gabby FRICKING... make me happy again... for a while... happiness is temporary..
.
Forrest: ....
Mr. Rosencrantz: Now, Forrest...
Mmmm...
eldritch s. (GM): give me ideas
Space: i know
Forrest quietly prays for death
Space: a party clown, who's sad because all his balloons popped
Mobile L: YESSS
Kehehehe
Mr. Rosencrantz: A clown... who's sad because all of his balloons were popped.
And Nathan, you'll be...
Forrest: ...........
Space: ...
hup
Forrest this is somehow a dig at my appearance i know it
Steph: ...
Steph quiet snrk
Steph god bless you rosencrantz...
Mr. Rosencrantz: i need ideas
Gabby just pities the jerk Texan for once
Space: nathan is a french spy
here to steal government secrets
Mr. Rosencrantz: A French spy, here to steal secrets.
Alright, now, you'll all leave and bring Jaime in.
And don't tell him who you are.
But you'll slowly reenter the room.
Forrest EXHALATION
Gabby ...does he miss Texas? He probably misses Texas. Maybe that's why he acts
out...
Mr. Rosencrantz: And act out your characters.
Until he guesses.
Alright?
Are we all on the same page?
Steph tries to psyche herself up
Steph: Yep.
Nathan: Wee wee!
Forrest is just waiting on that meteor
Forrest: Mm.
Quebec: WELL ZAT IS JUST OFFENZIV SHEET
Gabby stares sadly at Forrest, projecting all her self-pity onto him
Gabby: no 1 curr quebec
now frick off and tell my mother i hate her
Mr. Rosencrantz: Alright, bring Jaime back in, and plan out who goes in first.
Forrest feels eyes on him and looks over at Gab
Gabby sad, sad child-stares. Looks mildly contemplative
Forrest: ......?
Steph: ...Uh... Forrest, you go first?
Forrest last night she was a psychopath and now she's gloomy the fuck's up with
this child
Forrest: ,,,
Mr. Rosencrantz lets Jaime in
Forrest looks back over at Steph
Gabby maybe... maybe Dad acted out because he was miserable... maybe that's why
fricked that Quebec lady...
Forrest: ...Oh-...Fine.
Mr. Rosencrantz: Alright, you three, in the hall!
This isn't your house.
Steph files on out
Forrest walks out
Forrest: nathan why are you smelling steph's hair
Jaime heads back in
Nathan: lavender
Gabby maybe that's why grandma and grandpa still like him... because they unders
tand it or something... like, his pain...
Jaime looking back at the three leaving
Mr. Rosencrantz: Alright, set up while you wait for your guests to arrive.
You'll have to guess what roles theyre playing.
Jaime: ...So, I know they're the guests, but don't know what they are, right?
Mr. Rosencrantz: Yes.
Jaime: Got it.
Steph: ...
Steph psyches herself up some more
Forrest is just irritated
Mr. Rosencrantz waits
Nathan is excited
Forrest this is totalitarianism in some form this is injustice
Nathan: ... Who goes...?
Steph: Forrest should go.
Forrest: ...Oh- Right. Do I have to knock.
Jaime also waitan
Nathan: Go, Forrest, go!
Steph: Ring the doorbell!
Forrest: .....
Gabby Sullen, quiet observance
Forrest walks over and knocks
Jaime: Oh - come in.
Forrest: .......
Forrest exhales in resignation.....if he has to do this, he might as well give h
is best performance possible
Space: forrest says 'melon'
jaime: "alright, that's it. forrest. you have to go." -magically hovers him out
the doorForrest: rolling 3d20 +1
(
5
+
20
+
1
)+1
= 27
Space: he did his best
Narrator : Forrest trips as he walks in.
Forrest WHAM
Jaime: ...
Forrest flat on his face
Gabby:
Mr. Rosencrantz covers his mouth in horror
Forrest: .....
Steph quiet snrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrk
Jaime: Are... you okay?
Gabby frickin
Vlad laughs his ass off
Forrest roll with it
Gabby tears up a bit just watching
Jaime wants to laugh, but after what happened LAST TIME...
Vlad: AHAHAHAAHAHAOHOHOHHOHUAHAHAHAHAAHHA!!!
Forrest depressingly inchworms his way across the floor
Vlad is tearing up with amusement
Jaime: ...I have to guess, right?
Forrest: Boo hoo. Boo hoo hoo.
Mr. Rosencrantz: Give it some time.
Nathan: ...
Jaime: How many guesses do I have?
Forrest: I could get up, but what's the point. Ah boo hoo hoo.
Mr. Rosencrantz: There's no hard limit
Forrest: Curse my giant shoes.
Jaime: Got it.
A giant?
Gabby goddddd... it... it hurts... it's too real...
Forrest: Why must I suffer for the amusement of others.
{(
17
+
5
+
17
)}+-1
= 16
Forrest: All I ever wanted was to provide children with merriment in the form of
balloons.
Mr. Rosencrantz: Not a giant.
also no you guess yourself
Jaime: A clown?
Mr. Rosencrantz: What kind of clown?
Fawkes M.: That roll was to make something divergent from my own guess
Jaime: A sad clown?
Mr. Rosencrantz: Why's the clown sad
Jaime: ...Because he tripped?
Forrest: But now with them gone, I must resort to injuring myself for hateful la
ughs.
Jaime: Or, no.
Gabby because life sucks and then you DIE...........
Forrest: Life is a cruel joke at my expense.
Nathan: ... When do we go...?
Jaime: Because he always does this, right?
Space: nihilist gabby
Jaime: Tripping.
Steph: I think when he gets it.
Forrest: Oh, if only I had balloons again.
Mr. Rosencrantz rubs his chin hair
Jaime: ...Is he fired?
Mr. Rosencrantz: Nope.
Jaime: Just out of balloons?
Mr. Rosencrantz: Yes!
Forrest: Okay, can I go sit back down now.
Mr. Rosencrantz: He's sad because all of his balloons have been popped.
Sure, Forrest.
Jaime: Wouldn't have thought.
Steph: Okay, I want to go next!
Forrest: ....Actually, you know what, I think I'm just gonna keep lying here.
Mr. Rosencrantz: Go ahead.
Forrest: Mm.
Steph shuts the door
Jaime looks over at Steph
Steph knock knock knock
Steph: It's me!
Steph knock knock knock knock knock knock
Mr. Rosencrantz: she's freddy
Gabby aaaaaa... forrest I'M SORRY I'M SORRY FORREST I'M SORRY DAD
Jaime walks over and opens it
Jaime: Come in?
Forrest: ....Can I get a tissue or something, I think my nose is bleeding.
Steph bursts in before he even says it
Steph: Jaime! J-- where are you?!
Mr. Rosencrantz: she punches him in the dick
Steph: Oh, there you are!
Gabby: ...U-u-uh... yeah...
Gabby SNIFF
Steph: I've just created a new -- the most legendary device of all time, I call
it...
Gabby gets up to get a tissue for THAT POOR FRICKING TEXAN BOY
Steph: Uh, Physics Creation Number Zero Zero Eight - The Thing that Applies Cent
rifugal Force!
Jaime: .....
Steph: It's brilliant! AAAAAHAHAHA!
Steph cackles madly, striking a pose
Jaime: Oh, you're a mad scientist?
Steph: A scientist?! Perish the thought!
Mr. Rosencrantz: ... I'll give it to you.
Gabby starts crying a little on her way over
Steph: Wh-Oh.
I was, um, a mad physicist.
Mobile L: She was become the Kyouma
Mac D.: steph: I AM MAH SAYAINTISS
IS KOOOOOOORU
Gabby grabs a tissue for herself too and blows her nose... hhhhhhh
Mac D.: SONOFABITCH
Gabby SADRUNBACK
Jaime: ...Well, then you mislead me there.
Jaime smirks a bit
Gabby GIVE... TISSUE...
Steph: Mad scientists make science things, mad physicists make...
Forrest looks up, the blood having smeared
Steph: ...Physicist.. things?
Forrest: ...Oh- thanks.
Steph is looking at Gabby funny
Steph: ...
Mr. Rosencrantz: COME IN RICHARD!
Forrest takes the tissue, noticing that Gabby's all sniffles
Forrest: .....
Nathan: OUI OUI, OUT OF MAH WAY!!
Nathan throws the door open
Gabby AAAAAAAAA STUFF THE SNIFFLES nooooooooooo rgrhrghrgrghrh...
Forrest: .....Are youSpace: suzie quietly plays piano in steph's desk
Forrest oh she walked away
Forrest: .....
Forrest cleans up his bloody face
Gabby hurries away before Forrest sees her lose it further, burying her face in
the coat sleeve
Jaime 's attention goes away from Gabby, and back to Nathan
Ken: Gabby.
Jaime: Are... are you a revolutionary?
Ken: It's okay.
Nathan: MOI? NO, UNZINKABLE!
Gabby AAAAAAAA FRICK FRICK FRICK YOU LOST CONTROL OF YOUR LIFE
Nathan: I VOULD NEVAR BETRAY YOU!

Forrest has rolled onto his back and is staring up at the ceiling
Forrest: .........
Nathan: I AM NOT ZE SPAY!
Gabby: ...muhhhh...?
Mac D.: roll to determine if nose is broken
Jaime: ...You're ze spy?
Nathan: sure
Mac D.: rolling 1d20
(
2
)
= 2
Nathan: NO!
Space: busted
Mobile L: Nathan is a national treasure
Mr. Rosencrantz: holy shit
it's llike fucking
Jaime turns back to Rosencrantz
Mr. Rosencrantz: busted to shit
you'll need to see
the nurse
Jaime: Is he the spy?
Forrest: ......
Forrest yeah this hurts
Mr. Rosencrantz: A French one, yeah.
Forrest just
Forrest just don't move
Mr. Rosencrantz: Uh, Forrest...
Jaime nogs
Forrest: Mm.
Jaime: Got it-Mr. Rosencrantz: You want me to get a nurse...
Forrest: ....I'll just go.
Space: the day of all the blood
Jaime has only noticed Forrest's nose now
Jaime: ...
Mr. Rosencrantz: No, no, it's fine.
Gabby: ;A;
Mr. Rosencrantz: You stay right there.
Forrest: My legs are fine I can walk.
Mr. Rosencrantz: I'll get Foxhole.
Forrest just....hold it IN.....
Space: https://31.media.tumblr.com/5e67640440a3dd6de2ba3ccfea5a2ee6/tumblr_inlin
e_nzp0k1uc831qhjcfl_500.gif
Forrest: I can walk please it's fine.
Space: https://38.media.tumblr.com/aae216a8f50045ad23170f27fc5a6f68/tumblr_inlin
e_nzp0k5dSrX1qhjcfl_500.gif
Mr. Rosencrantz: you need to race him
Steph: ......
Forrest sits up and stumbles out of the classroom
Steph: ...Um...
Mr. Rosencrantz: move faster fatty
roll brawn
(
7
+
5
+
3
)
= 15
Gabby continues fighting and losing the battle against SADZ
Jaime: ...I hope there won't be another trial.
Mr. Rosencrantz: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + for Brawn
{(
11
+
4
+
13
)}
= 11
Mr. Rosencrantz runs into the the office
Mr. Rosencrantz: you've lost, forrest
Steph: Who would be the defendant? The door?
Forrest: .....
Gabby: ...Frick... Ffffffrickin'...
Steph: Um... or, if it's your house, then you might be legally culpable or somet
hing...
Jaime: Guess we'll have to see...
Forrest looks around for a nearby restroom
Jaime glances back at Gabby
Gabby is having a rather sad 48 hours. First teen hormones, maybe?
Jaime: ...
Nurse Foxhole begins walking out with Rosencrantz, there's a washroom right next
to you, Forrest
Jaime how surrounded by other classmates is she, really
Forrest: .....
Forrest ducks into the restroom
Narrator : Decently close.
Gabby like frickin' hecka
Gabby even sempai
Narrator : ...
Jaime sighs a bit, not wanting to seem more like mobbing than comforting
Narrator : fuck
Ken: Gabby.
I understand why you're upset.
Ken eyes the people around

Forrest: ....
Ken: You're right to be.
But you can't let it haunt you like this.
Forrest silently walks into a cubicule, and pulls out a shit-ton of toilet paper
Narrator : He does so.
Wow.
Forrest bundles it up, and presses it against his face
Narrator : This is nice toilet paper for a public washroom.
It's almost not sandpaper.
Gabby: ...Frickin'... 's stupid, Ken, I... I'm better than this, I don't get all.
..
Forrest: [Muffled "OOOOOOW. FUCK. SHIT. FUCKING SHIT. OOOOOOOW. GOD DAMN IT. OW.
FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK."]
Ken: You're human, Gabby.
Steph: .......
Steph keeps quiet, making an effort not to look at Gab
Mobile L: God bless poor Forrest
Lilly: ... Yeah.
Narrator : The person on the toilet next to Forrest perks up
Forrest takes the bundle off of his face, his expression still the same tired lo
ok of irritation
Mr. Schmidt: MEIN GOTT!!
Jaime: ...
Jaime looks back at Steph
Forrest walks out, throwing the bundle away, and gets the FUCK out as fast he ca
n back into the hallway
Mr. Schmidt flails around, ass on the toilet in his cubical
Gabby: ...I... I frickin' have to... not, uhh... not have this happen, y-y'know.
..? I need to be... tough, and... and... brave, a-and... mad as heck about the w
rong things...
...S-so I can make them right...
Nurse Foxhole: Hey, Forrest!
Forrest: ....
Forrest looks at Foxhole
Steph: ...How was I?
Nurse Foxhole: Let me see your nose.
Forrest: ...Okay.
Space: https://33.media.tumblr.com/631119dd4be6af9ed828af4f8669502e/tumblr_nty8s
eO8OL1sl2jkoo7_r1_250.gif
Jaime: ...I liked it, actually. Pretty good.
Fawkes M.: Oh my god
Space: fight
Mobile L: Dance battle
Suzie: Gabby, if you need to take a break from all this, you can, you should.
Steph: I, uh... I liked doing the laugh.
Anton: ... Is alright...
Nurse Foxhole: Alright...
Nurse Foxhole examines his face
Nurse Foxhole: rolling {3d20kh1} + 2 for increased mind
{(
16
+
7
+
20
)}+2
= 22
Space: wizard
Gabby: ...Frickin'... That'd be selfish, though... Youyou guys need me, and...
Nurse Foxhole: Yeah, yeah, alright.
Space: vlad: 'what the fuck'
Nurse Foxhole: This is a big mess.
Jaime: Yeah, it seemed fun.
Steph: ...
Nurse Foxhole: Come with me, I got just the thing.
Steph looks back over at the Situation
Forrest: ..It feels like it.
On my face.
Because of the blood.
Nurse Foxhole waves him to follow
Forrest: ...
Forrest follow
Vlad: ... What...?
Gabby: ...And if I bow out now, then... frickin'... one of you could, like... 'm
frickin' in this, whether I like it or not...
Anton: You need you more, whatever is, you should lay on bed and have a load off
of you.
Gabby: ...I just... I just need to...
Steph: .........
Gabby:
Nurse Foxhole: Right, close your eyes and count to ten.
Forrest: .....
Gabby: ...believe that I'm... powerful again... becausebecause that'sthat's what..
.
Forrest exhales out his mouth and closes his eyes

Forrest: One...
Gabby: ...That's always what...
Forrest: Two....
Jaime: ...
Forrest: Three....
Four.....
Nurse Foxhole begins doing something to his face
Forrest: ....Five.......
...Six.....
Seven....
Eight....
Nine....
Nurse Foxhole finishes the job
Forrest: Ten.
Nurse Foxhole wipes his hands
Jaime: ...Do you think everyone here knows by now?
Nurse Foxhole: Alright.

Steph rests her chin on her hand, looking at the blackboard despondently
Nurse Foxhole beams at him
Steph: Knows what?
Forrest opens his eyes
Forrest: ......
Forrest feels his face
Steph which is to say no
Nurse Foxhole has just immaculatly patched up his nose, it should recover well e
nough in no time
Forrest: ...Oh, wow.
Jaime: About what's going on after school.
Jaime trying to use discreet wording
Gabby: ...If... If I think... I can make a difference... then I can... I... I ha
ve... I fricking... always have...
Steph: I dunno what you're talking about.
Suzie: Gabby, you are powerful.
Forrest: Thanks, Mister Foxhole.
Ken: You are.
Remember that.
Jaime sighs, reaches for his phone, and texts something to her
Nurse Foxhole: Eyy, no problem.
Nurse Foxhole washes his hands in the sink, admiring the anime posters on his of
fice walls
Forrest: ....
Nurse Foxhole: they're all really yuri anime
Gabby: ...O-okay... I just... I just gotta... keep that in mind... even with tha
t... that guy and what he said he'd...
Space: foxhole is great
Forrest sees this man has never heard of not mixing business with pleasure
Mobile L: Forrest gets a nosebleed for a different reason
Forrest quietly excuses himself to return to class with his bandaged face.
Anton: ... You powerful, like what is they say.
Gabby:
Mac D.: are mr. hawthorne and mr. hall in the hall
Anton: If guy mess with you, talk, and maybe we help.
Narrator : yeah
Gabby: ...Th-thanks... all of you...
Narrator : they're having a stern chat
Gabby oh gawd frick anton you're not even in on this
Forrest notices mr. hawthorne AHA
Forrest approaches
Steph types something out back quickly
Mr. Hawthorne: I am concerned about the nature of these complaints I've b-
Mr. Hawthorne turns to Forrest

Mr. Hawthorne: Oh, hello, son!
Forrest: Yeah, hi. I have a question.
Gabby ...tch... fricking... should be able to believe without making OTHERS do i
t for you... g-gotta... gotta step it up...
Dr. Hall: If it is nothing to you, Mr. Hawthorne I really must be returning to m
y *worl.
Gabby ...you can still save them all...
Dr. Hall: *work
Dr. Hall just walks away
Gabby ...even if it doesn't... seem like it at all...
Forrest: ...
Jaime "you're an idiot, Lancaster," he thinks to himself
Jaime: ...
Mr. Hawthorne: Sure, what is it, son?
Gabby deep breffs... comforting coat...
Vlad: Anton.
Shut up.
Saying shit like that is a good way to get stabbed.
Forrest: ...Did you live in this town back in the 1960's.
Steph: I hope she's okay.
Mr. Hawthorne seems sad for a moment
Mr. Hawthorne: ... You think I'm a fossil, don't you...
Oh!
No, I lived in Calgary.
Jaime: Yeah.
Gabby still sad, but at least she doesn't look like she's gonna curl up into a l
ittle armadillo ball anymore
Forrest: ...Oh.
Do you know anyone who lived here during the 1960's.
Mr. Hawthorne: The old principal, but he's dead...
Jaime: I was just wondering in case they'd get it.
Mr. Hawthorne: Hrm..
Forrest: ....
Mr. Hawthorne: I think I might, tell you what, son, I'll get back to you on that
.
Jaime: It'd help her a bit more.
Forrest: Alright. Thanks.
Steph: ...This day sucks.
Gabby tries to stuff the residual doubt that she might not ever be able to bring
back Chopin
Gabby:
Mr. Hawthorne: No problem.
Space: just make ken wear a powdered wig
Forrest turns and goes to return to class
Jaime: ...
Jaime looks back at Steph
Lilly lays a hand on Gabby
Lilly: Don't worry.

I'm with you.
Space: the party grows
Vlad coughs and mutters "Lesbian" under his breath
Gabby: ...Thanks...
Gabby sniffles a bit and awkwardly pats her hand
Narrator : Mr. Rosencrantz follows Forrest back, apologizing profusely
Fawkes M.: This seems like a certain brand of FG conversation where everyone tri
es to comfort one person at a time
*the same time
Forrest assures him it's alright
Mobile L: No one can resist the tiny child
Space: what she needs is a hug
Narrator : this class is made of decent human beings
Fawkes M.: No
She needs a huh
Mobile L: From Grandma
Forrest walks into the class with his bandaged-to-shit face and notices everyone
burying Gabby with their bodies
Space: the bathroom nightlight keeps flickering on and off
Nathan has fallen asleep
Space: i can see it from my room it's very distracting
Fawkes M.: Nosferatu...!
Mac D.: don't look space
Gabby ...aaaaaah god, he's probably still also sad and nobody's gonna hug HIM be
cause he's hideous and mean...
Gabby ...fricking...
Forrest: ....Did I miss something.
Jaime: .....
Forrest has the look of a man who has resigned himself to the reality that no on
e will ever hug him
Mr. Rosencrantz checks his watc
Gabby: ...No... Uh... Are you okay?
Gabby says with genuine concern in her voice
Mr. Rosencrantz: ... Wonder if I can catch Alice...
Forrest: Yeah, fine. Nurse bandaged me up.
Mr. Rosencrantz quietly rushes out
Gabby: ...That's, uh... that's good... That looked kinda fricked...
Forrest: It's no big deal. Noses heal fast.

Steph: ...
Steph checks the time as well
Narrator : Class is nearly over.
Very very close.
Gabby: Yeah... Still, though, frickin' always just... hurts like a motherfricker
.
Gabby residual sniffle
Forrest: Yeah, but pain's temporary.

Fawkes M.: BRB for a bit
Gabby: ...That. That's goddang right.
Steph prays for lunch
Forrest: ...Unless you have, like, arthritis or something chronic like that.
Narrator : yeah lucn IS next
Forrest: Then pain never really goes away.
Space: here's a question
Forrest: But that's what medicine's for, so.
Space: has the party had any weekends yet
Gabby: ...Yeah. But, like, we're all young, and science will fix it one day.
Narrator : no because we haven't actuall
cleared a week
Space: this is all one week
holy shit
Forrest: Maybe,
Space: thats fuckin amazing
Narrator : i'm just saying today is thursday
Space: hump day...
Mobile L Hawthorne flashbacks
Narrator : hump day
Mac D.: hump day is Wednesday
Narrator : everyone humps
Mac D.: you fucking stupid son of a bitch
Narrator : the bells goes
it's lunchtiime
you weak
Mac D.: i'll beat the shit out of you i swear i will
Narrator : pathetic
white
white guilt
milquetoast
Forrest TO LAUNCH
Narrator : piece of human trash
Forrest: sup bby how u doin
i got the good stuff for you today premium shit
Narrator : Looks lik the supervising teachers are all chatting
Forrest what's on de menu today b0ss
Gabby STOWS the remainder of the awful sads and tries to put her SERIOUS FACE on
again
Narrator : did he not bring his own lunch
Forrest FINE SURE YOU LAZY PRICK
Steph is smart and brought her own lunch, as is the standard
Forrest finds an empty table and rightly plants himself there
Steph not some idiot like forest...
Jaime has packed lunch + juju fruit
Steph: jaime and the power of juju
Forrest has a sandwich and bodado chibs
Space: what kind
Forrest: peanut butter and bologna

Space: weird potato chip flavor
Narrator : the cast is too large
Forrest: no that's my sandwich you mong
Space: i meant
the chip
Forrest: bbq
Steph: i'm hiding
behind forrest's massive girth
Forrest: get out of the folds in my fat
Jaime: she's playing football with forrest
she thought it was soccer
but he's murrican
Mac D.: i can totally see that
Steph just promptly sits down across from Forrest, opening up her lunchbox
Narrator : Rosencrantz and Guildenstern talk enthusiastically.
Mac D.: steph prepares to dribble, forrest tackles her to the groun
Narrator : Lachance seems salty and bitter, watching the students like a hawk.
The Eye of Sauron.
Forrest glances at Steph arriving for like a second before returning to his sand
wich
Mac D.: why's lachance so bitter she's a fairly attractive woman she could get f
ar in life
Steph: Heyo.
Forrest: Mm.
Forrest num num num
Jaime opts to sit by Gabby now
Steph om nomn om
Narrator : she clearly does not look after her appearence
Mac D.: why IS lachance so angry and bitter
Narrator : it's the magic and the mystery
Mac D.: i c
Steph: What is it you like, Forrest.
Jaime: of potato knishes
Space: this machine creates
Narrator : she's a potato knishe
Space: little black squash balls
Narrator : *knish
Forrest: I'm sorry?
Steph: You know, hobbies and stuff.
Forrest: Oh.
Steph: Fuckin'... like golf or bowling. You like bowling?
Forrest: I play video games and waste time on the internet.
Narrator : hey cuz let's go bowling
Steph: Oh, cool.
Forrest: Never golfed before, bowled once or twice on family trips.
Narrator : lel shitkid beat him at bowling
and he was trying too
Steph the 'oh cool' of a woman who enjoys going hiking and shooting bows
Gabby nods to Jaime, sipping on her thermos full of Grandma's special bn riu
Gabby: ...Hey.
Jaime nods back
Forrest is aggressively apathetic and takes another bite of his sandwich

Jaime: You doing alright?
Narrator : Vlad and Anton yammer at each other in Hungarian
Mobile L: I am gonna be a rebel and give myself until 12:30 this time
Mac D.: you absolute madwoman
Gabby: ...Yeah, um... Better, I think...
Steph: I'm pretty glad that you're starting to fit in so easy.
Jaime: ...Mm. That's good.
Jaime does she still have the coat
Lilly just watches Gabby and Jaime talk, silent
Gabby oh heckie yeah she does
Forrest: I would not consider my current situation as "fitted in."
Suzie: It seems close enough.
Gabby: ...I, um... I kinda told Lilly about, uh... current events yesterday.
Steph: Yeah, like... what would you call it?
Jaime: ...
Jaime that explains her reaction to him and Steph
Lilly: Don't worry, I believe you.
Jaime: That's good.
Forrest: Well, depending on the situation, it's between "quietly disdained" and
"forced to stay alive together"
Lilly: ... I always knew there was something more to life...
Forrest nom
Suzie: ... We don't have to do any of this, when you think about it.
Gabby: ...Yeah... Frickin'... Next time the fricked up crap happens, we can...
Mac D.: is suzie talking with forrest n steph
Suzie: yes
Space: ya
Mac D.: ahh k
Jaime nods again
Jaime: Just...
Jaime glances around at the nearby others
Forrest: Are you referring to what I think you're referring to.
Lilly: You can trust me, don't worry.
Jaime: Keep it between us for now.
Steph: It's too late to just give up.
Jaime: Thanks.
Lilly nods
Forrest: I suppose theoretically whenever "It" happens, we could just hunker dow
n somewhere and wait it out.
Every day, forever.
Gabby: ...We'll, um... We'll make sure you stay safe and all that, too.
Gabby idly feels of THE COAT with her non-soup hand
Suzie: He said it would stop after a while.
Jaime: Yeah, we will.
Forrest: Oh well if that's the case.
Jaime looks over at Gabby
Suzie: ... I don''t want to hide, but it's always an option.
Jaime: ...Where'd you get the coat?
Lilly: I don't need protecting, don't you worry.

Forrest: Have any of you successfully waited it out.
Steph: Haven't tried it.
Forrest: It could be that the shift is affected by our actions in it.
We're pulled into it, and we're not allowed back out until something gets done.
Gabby: ...A guy was sellin' them... And like... He caught me after I had an, um.
.. a cry...
Mr. Mu: lol you could ask me
Forrest: yeah
Gabby: ...So he felt obligated to give me one or whatever.
Forrest: i bet i could, asshole
Mr. Mu: lol
Steph: I don't want to sit around and wait for it.
Gabby: ...'S good to hear, Lilly. Uh... We can get you hooked up with the powers
and stuff, too.
Jaime: ...What was his name?
Forrest: That's fine and dandy, but I would assume other people would prefer to
live.
Forrest nom
Ed Stuart: the north remembers
fuck you jaime
Jaime: i send my regards
Jaime STAB
Ed Stuart: urgh
Steph: Yeah, okay.
Gabby: ...Oh frick, ummm... Ed, I think?
Forrest: See. "Quietly disdained."
Jaime: ...
Forrest crunch crunch crunch
Steph: Do you want my almonds? I don't like them.
Suzie: We shouldn't let personality conflicts jeopardize what we're doing.
Forrest: No thanks, not that much of a fan of them, myself.
Jaime: ...Good of him.
Narrator : "i don't like them because they're too salty, just like you"
Steph: Well, it's a peace treaty.
Do you want them, Suzie?
Suzie: Sure.
Steph gives the bag of almonds that has been kicking around in her lunchbox for
about a week
Suzie munches on the almoonds
Forrest MUNCH
Gabby: ...Why, are you, like... looking to buy yourself one?
Space: they're almonds
i don't know why i felt to give that bit of gm clarification when i am not a gm
Jaime: Oh, no. Winter's not for a while.
Forrest: .......
Gabby then proceeds to help herself to some of Grandma's special bnh rn... shhhhhi
t y'all those're tasty-looking fried things...
Forrest: ....You know Ms. Lao.
Steph: Yeah. She's like that lately.
Forrest: What's that about.
Gabby: ...He seemed to think it was pretty soon. But I guess, like... he stands
to make a buck off of that.
Narrator : she's normally quite peppy

Steph: It's fucked up.
Jaime: Yeah, that's the Stuart family business.
Narrator : Steph remembers the time she got so hyped up that she accidentally br
oke into another class with them and pretended to be annexing it in the name of
the Roman Empire.
Jaime: Winter coats sold all year long.
Steph the best history teacher she's ever had
Steph: ...
Forrest: Has she always been such a space case.
Jaime: ...Heh, just cause they want to stay in business they say "winter is comi
ng".
Gabby: ...Welp. Shouldn't have to, this is a dang good coat.
Narrator : it's made with love
Jaime: I guess it's just not my style.
Gabby: D'you get hot easy? I'm, like, fricking exactly the opposite, but that's
just 'cuz I'm small and bony.
Gabby CHOMPS the dumpling, as if to make a statement about how much more she nee
ds to eaaaaat
Steph: This one time, back when she was teaching us about the Roman empire, she
sort of, like... took us and annexed Mr. Pink's art class. She was just so, uh..
. hyped up? About ancient Rome. We got them to paint us battle standards and eve
rything...
Forrest like me
Jaime: No, I have jackets. Just not really thick ones.
Forrest: ....Wow, jesus.
Gabby: ...Nyeheh. Maybe I can graduate to those after I get my next growth spurt
...
Forrest: Is she a manic depressive.
Gabby: ...I kinda wonder if I'm gonna get fat.
Jaime: Well, you just gotta keep exercising, right?
Narrator : look at jasper
Steph: I have no idea. She's never been like this.
Narrator : all the wy over at the side
alone
Space: someone should sit by her and make a friend
Forrest: Maybe she's been keeping it in check with medication until now.
Narrator : she's jasper
Jaime: alone, intoxicated with victory on the hill of swords
Narrator : she summons ubw
Space: someone should sit by her and make a friend
Gabby: Yeah, I guess. I mean, Grandpa's... you've seen him, but Grandma's... you
've seen her. And, uh... my, uhm...
...Biological parent...
Jasper: i ahm da bown of mah sord
Gabby: ...Is also kinda chubby, so I dunno.
Forrest: Of course, far be it from me to ask about other people's drugs.
....What about Ms. Lachance, what's her deal.
Space: hey duff
Steph: Maybe.
Space: https://40.media.tumblr.com/85a3b6694ef9d4c09ccd443c7e56a101/tumblr_nzisw
mGqDh1rhuitso1_540.png its the anime jojo's bizarre adventure
Jaime: Heh. You should see my cousin Robert.
Steph: Oh, she doesn't have a deal.
Forrest: So she's just angry all the time.
Jaime: He gained like, what, ninety pounds? A year after he won the lottery.
Forrest: Man, how can somebody live that way, annoyed all the time.
Gabby: ...Wooooow, what the frick? Like, shouldn't he be able to afford gyms and
stuff?
Steph: Yeah, I wonder.
Jaime: That's what you'd think.
Ms. Lachance: ... I heard that, you little shits.
Forrest: That was a joke, by the way.
Jaime: But, I dunno. He discovered fine food.
Forrest looks at Ms. Lachance.
Jaime: And he liked it.
Ms. Lachance seems lightly pensive
Steph: Yeah, Forrest, she's kind of right over there.
Forrest: ...Oh.
Jaime: Steaks, caviar, really expensive sushi... y'know.
Steph: I didn't want to say anything.
Forrest: Hey, Ms. Lachance. How come you're so angry all the time.
Steph: I mean, you know now, soooohmygod.
Gabby: Frickin' poutine, probably. A certain family member really seems to like
that stuff, 'specially after he spent all that time in Quebec.
Ms. Lachance: ...
Ms. Lachance: None of your business, shitkid,
Jaime: Oh, yeah! Robert totally loves that, too
.
Forrest: Okay. Thanks.
Gabby: ...Frrrriiiiiick, what if they're... the same guy?
Forrest: So what were we talking about.
Steph: I dunno.
Do you like books?
Jaime: Then that means we're really long lost relatives.
Ms. Lachance resumes staring kids down
Forrest: I read, yes.
Jaime: ...Or not, since Robert's a sort of step-cousin.
Steph: Did you ever read any of the Ashen Glade books?
(
17
+
17
+
19
)+1
= 54
Ms. Lachance: yeah he has
Gabby: Nyeheheheh! I was gonna say, you don't look Vietnamese enough.
Forrest: Those sword and sorcery books, right.
Fawkes M.: They kinda ended up in limbo after the cave
Ms. Lachance: The author delays new editions too much, it feels like they haven'
t moved from that God damn cave.
Jaime: That'd be something to really find out, wouldn't it?
Forrest: I stopped at the part where they got high as shit in a cave and some gr
emlin farted on Darius' face.
Fawkes M.: I wanna Darius now
Gabby: No frickin' kidding. 'S barely even, what, ten whole Vietnamese people in
all of Canada?
Ms. Lachance: just like the four black people in star wars
Fawkes M.: Five if you count deleted scenes
Ms. Lachance: the phantom black guy
Steph: Yeah, that part was kinda dumb.
Jaime: Heh, that really is true.
Mobile L: Secret deleted black guy
Forrest: I checked out a couple books from the library yesterday, actually.
Steph: Yeah?
Forrest: Yeah. I'm looking into the history of its town and its local legends.
Ms. Lachance realizes no one cared what she says and just goes bck to her coffee
Forrest: *this town
Gabby: Everyone always thinks I'm Chinese and, frickin'... at this point, I don'
t think I have enough traction to correct them anymore.
Space: poor lachance
Ms. Lachance: there are a lot of chinese people in british columbia
Steph: Cool. I don't know anything about that.
Forrest: I met Ms. Lao at that library.
Space: man
lachance tried to connect with the kids
and she just got shut down
no wonder she's bitter
Ms. Lachance: wait
let me just
Mobile L: gary_jules_mad_world.wav
Forrest: She told me that back in the sixties there was this massive explosion b
y this school.
Ms. Lachance: there goes that ocial link
Space: that saddens me
she is best teach
Steph: This one?
Mobile L: Slow fade to grayscale, closeup on her indignant pout
Mac D.: forrest will form a social link with Lachance based on mutual disdain fo
r everything
his hateful face is a calming presence
Forrest: Yeah, this one.
A lot of people died, and apparently to this day, nobody's ever figured out what
caused it.
Ms. Lachance: ...
Ms. Lachance eventually stands up and leaves
Forrest: ...?
Forrest watches her fuck off
Ms. Lachance: ... Fuck it...
Mobile L: all around me are familiar faces
Space feels bad for the teach
Steph: That's... kind of fucked up.
Forrest: .....
Forrest: I'm going to try and find out what happened.
Narrator : it was breen
Mobile L: Oh, yo
I've established
Forrest: You know anybody who might've lived here during the sixties.
Fawkes M.: I'm greeting my dad from the airport
Narrator : a nation-state
Mobile L: Gavel Lake!Breen is TH!Breen's father, and TH!Breen is Breen Jr.
Narrator : that's good
Fawkes M.: So
Space: fare whele
it's 12:30 anyhow
mmmmobile
Narrator : it's going to stop here abouts anywayu
Fawkes M.: I'll try to smash ba- alright
Narrator : take you time
hijack the plane
Fawkes M.: Thanks
Mobile L: Yus, I gotta get my beeb beeb sleeps
Narrator : fly into the trade center
Space: get me some of those airport candies
Mobile L: Melt steel beams
Space: or a pretzel from one of those airport pretzel shops
i like those
Narrator : praise be
Space: but they don't have any actual pretzel shops
Fawkes M.: Oh, we're not going to the airport, he just arrived via taxi
Narrator : oh okay
Space: get me a pretzel
Mobile L: Melt steel beams anyway
Narrator : hijack the taxi
Fawkes M.: Got it
Space: i'm hankering for a pretzel now
Narrator : drive it into the center
Fawkes M.: Seeya fuckos
Narrator : bye
Space: l8r g8r
Fawkes M.: (Might be back in a Rabbit tho)
Mobile L: Adios...!
Fawkes M.: (if you're offering)
Space: i was just about to lank it
Mobile L: i won't because lol, sleep. YOU KIDS HAVE FUN
Mac D.: lator
Mobile L: g'naight
Space: night fckr
Narrator : no, duff, space
you stay
you listen to the ed
Space: i like the ed
Mac D.: good ed, good op
Steph sits in a hall, alone
Narrator : also how was that
Steph: i liked it
i've suddenly headcanoned that lao is steph's favorite teacher, solely due to th
at rome anecdote
Narrator : look at lachance
she got sad
and used the computr
Space: i feel really bad 4 her
Narrator : she has a reason for being such a prick
like i have it in the gm notes
i looked at it just now
i wonder how i'll pull off these "social links"
well FUCK you too space
Mac D.: just you and me now

Narrator : you have any thoughts then
Mac D.: i continue to love every member of this cast
Narrator : foxhole is a good nurse
Mac D.: ye
Narrator : he's also not a woman
Space: my thricedamned connection
Narrator : yeah but i myself feel bad for lachance
Mac D.: i refuse to believe that
Narrator : believe what
Mac D.: foxhole being a man
Narrator : e is
Space: he has dude hair
Narrator : he totally is
Mac D.: that is not dude hair that is LESBIAN HAIR
Narrator : he watches yuri
Mac D.: which explains the yuri
Narrator : he has yuri posters in his office
Forrest: star wars episode 3 is the most disappointing thing since star wars epi
sode 2
eldritch s. (GM): where are they
Mac D.: i have called the bozos
they will arrive at their usual bozo pace
Mobile L: hwazzup homos
Mac D.: hang on lemmie find a save point in Yakuza 5
eldritch s. (GM): right students just had their lunch yes
Mac D.: did you know you can use the Mayflash adapter on your PS3 it;s increadib
le
Space: so bold and so foolish
Mobile L: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eCiFO7qV54E
Space: jesus
Mobile L: Craw
Space: these crawl they will not crawl
crawl is how i crawl
crawling what is crawl
eldritch s. (GM): right yes fox will not be joining us today, i have duff's assu
rnces that fox is okay with it, as he asked
Mac D.: is troo
Mobile L: Koolio. We can recap 'im
eldritch s. (GM): CROATIUM
Mac D.: what are you picturing the losers doing in this particular OP
Space: theyre all watching starwars
eldritch s. (GM): wudu hide
Mobile L: Contemplative closeups
Mac D. FOOD
Forrest IT'S FUCKING DELICIOUS
Narrator : The bell goes, lunch is done, you little SHITS
Your next class, by royal decree, is science.
Steph packs up her stuff, feeling a quiet worry
Gabby awww FRICK YEAH, this soothes the soul
Forrest oh good something worth paying attention in that won't humiliate and pot
entially kill me
Forrest pops into the seat by Vlad
Gabby is still a lil' down, but feeling a lot better

Vlad is sullen, as usual
Forrest is in his natural state of sullen irritation
Steph: fucking germans
Forrest: go back to poland nazzy
Mr. Schmidt walks in
Mr. Schmidt: Hello, kinder...
Mr. Schmidt seems a little off-kilter
Gabby: Hello, Mr. Schmidt...
Gabby ohhhh frick, pls be okay, Best Teach
Forrest: ....
Forrest wow he looks like some dude out of the 1800s version of this school
Mr. Schmidt: Eh, I have not gotten my brother's official statement on that black
mass inside the pig...
Forrest: ....?
Forrest dafuq is he talking about
Mr. Schmidt: However, that will not stop us from continuing with class.
If all of you will open your textbooks to page 67.
Steph can't help but feel some trepidation about the weird gross pig
Steph opens up 'er book
Forrest: ....Uh.
Gabby OOOOOPEN
Forrest raises his hand
Mr. Schmidt: Today, eh, we will be covering genetics, according to Gr- Oh, yes?
Forrest: Yeah-..I'm new here. What was that about a pig?
Mr. Schmidt: Oh, I dissected a pig in the class as a starter, and it contained a
peculiar black mass.
Forrest: Oh.
So, like.....Was it a goop, or like moss, or what.
Mr. Schmidt: It was slightly cancerous, like a tumor, but coated in some thick,
black substance.
Forrest: ...Huh.
Well, okay then. Thanks.
Forrest opens his textbook
Gabby jegus frick, that frickin' pig, aaaaaa
Steph would bet, dollars to donuts, that it is somehow connected to stuff
Forrest writes down the NEW MYSTERY in his notes...
Mr. Schmidt: Right, uh, well...
Forrest hokay.....gene netics....
Mr. Schmidt: Gregor Mendel was an Austrian monk who did work with peapods...
He found that, pollinating certain peapods created certain offspring, to give a
simple example...
Gabby OHHHH YEAH, this guy. yeh, he was p cool

Mr. Schmidt: Say you have a two red flowers, and one blue flower.
If you breed the red flowers together, what colour would the resulting flower be
?
Forrest the irony...a man of god discovering genetics
Steph: rolling 3d20
(
13
+
20
+
14
)
= 47
Mr. Schmidt: he fucked the pea pods
steph
what do you fucking think
Steph: They'd be red!
Steph genius
Gabby congration you done it
Mr. Schmidt: Yes, yes, though this is not always true, it is very likely to be t
rue.
Forrest [half-hearted clapping sound effect]
Space: he makes that sound
with his mouth
Mr. Schmidt: Now, if you breed the red and the blue flowers together, what are t
he possibilities?
(
16
)+1
= 17
rolling 3d20 +1
(
3
+
5
+
13
)+1
= 22
Mr. Schmidt: you can forego rolling if you yourself know the answer
do you yourself know the answer
Mac D.: n
no...
Space: i always roll in the hopes that i'll get 1
so that i can come up with the stupidest fucking thing
Mac D.: "A PURPLE FLOWER"
Mr. Schmidt: well then you need to make up an answer
Mobile L: Nathan's answer
Mr. Schmidt: a big penis
see, mobile gets it
oh
that's space
Space: ;) ;) ;)
Mr. Schmidt: i get blues mixed up
space you fucked it up in this instance

Gabby isn't piping up bcuz she wants to try being nice to Texas and let him mayb
e do something good
Space: shit
yeah your right
Mr. Schmidt: one of them is a variable
so i can't do it for sure
that's why i asked for all possiblities
Forrest: ........It.....depends on the color genes.....I think.
Mr. Schmidt: did you look it up
Mobile L: BRB reel qwik
Mac D.: actually yes and i got animal crossing results so i just winged it
Space: amazing
Mr. Schmidt begins drawing https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/
1/17/Punnett_square_mendel_flowers.svg/2000px-Punnett_square_mendel_flowers.svg.
png this
Space: i already drew it because i'm cool
Mr. Schmidt goes on to explain how it works because i forget some of the termino
logy
Forrest LEARNING
Forrest WOW
Mr. Schmidt: And these are the very basics of genetics...
Space: genetics is cool
Forrest now you too have the potential to spit in the eye of God
Mr. Schmidt: Like the Bohr Diagram, or most early atomic models, they don't hold
true entirely, but they are a good start.
Space: forrest now knows the basics of eugenics
Mac D.: forrest http://scienceblogs.com/pharyngula/wp-content/blogs.dir/470/file
s/2012/04/i-dd55f012113fb7c28a2312d25d277a8d-chick2.jpg
Mr. Schmidt: And, as for a fun fact, do you know the name of the man who created
the Periodic Table?
Steph: rolling 3d20
(
18
+
16
+
4
)
= 38
It was Mendeleev!
Mr. Schmidt: So Mendeleev created the periodic table, and Mendel pioneered genet
ics, it is funny, is it not?
Forrest: ...
Steph: ...
Mobile L: Nyehehehe! Yeah.
Gabby: oopl lol
Mr. Schmidt: There we are...
And now, answer questions 1-4 in the text.
You may answer them as I put on a documentary about genetics on the projector...
Mr. Schmidt pulls down that tarp thing
Mr. Schmidt turns on the projector thing
Forrest right.....questions....LET'S go......

Gabby FRICK YES. LES DO IT MOTHERFRICKERS
(
20
+
8
+
12
)+1
= 41
Steph ready for action...
{(
7
+
9
+
14
)}+1
= 10
Steph: rolling 3d20
(
13
+
9
+
8
)
= 30
Narrator : Forrest is a normal human being.
Space: mr. schmidt accidentally puts on rick and morty
Forrest YEEEEEEEEEEEAH
Narrator : Gabby, gabby gets tripped up on the exact wording of a question.
Gabby RRRRRRGHHH FRICK...!
Narrator : Steph "lol, what's a gamete"
Steph: ......................
Narrator : A mustachioed man comes onto the projector.
Forrest: ...
Gabby RAPT ATTENTION
Narrator : if only
the volume on these
wasn't so stubborn
Space: oh m god
Laaheighy: Hello, young scientific minds! It is I, your host, Professor J. P. La
ahieghy!
Space: its him
Forrest: ...
Mobile L: At long last, the AdEVA connection
Laaheighy: Today, we'll be probing the field of genetics with the scholastic met
hod, using the secrets of deductive reasoning to crack the case, just as Gregor
Mendel did.
Gabby immediately begins taking notes
Narrator : He just begins

Mac D.: "NOW WATCH! AS THESE PIGS MATE!"
Steph reluctantly sets her homework down, watching this bizarre video
Mac D.: "HAHAHAHAH! ZOOM IN ON THE BLOOD, STEVE!"
Narrator : He just
He
He has an old fashioned, alchemy lab.
With like torches and shit.
Mac D.: now seer
should the invader zim theme be his theme
Gabby ...uh... wt frick
Mac D.: or should THIS be his theme
https://soundcloud.com/darth_joe/aqua-teen-hunger-force-the
Narrator : He begins like boiling shit and using his pestle and mortar.
There's some like occult shit in the background.
Mobile L ...whoa... frickin'...
Mac D.: "GENTLEMEN."
Gabby: fffff
Narrator : A Nobel Prize, apparently converted into led.
*lead
Steph likes this aesthetic
Gabby: (...Is this guy legit...?)
Mac D.: "BEHOLD!"
"I HAVE MADE LOVE TO THIS MACHINE!"
"AND NOW, UPON RETROSPECT. I ASK WHYYYYY..."
Laaheighy: BEHOLD! THE SERUM TO PROVE GENETICS!
Forrest: .....
Laaheighy: I shall pour it into this soil, and the plant shall be, converted, in
it genetic code, to a purple-flowering, blood drinking ivy!
Gabby: ...Uh...?
Laahieghy: , this will make my results dramatic, and quite indisputable...
Narrator : He dumps it in
There's an edit.
Gabby:
Steph: ........
Steph this is amazing
Gabby FROWNS
Steph this is beautiful and amazing
Gabby HERESY
Narrator : The room is now covered in ivy, with purple flowers
Forrest: .....
Narrator : Laahieghy has a machete
Laaheighy: For God's sake, good man, stop rolling, this must be destroyed!
Gabby looks at Mr. Schmidt like "are you seeing this????"
Narrator : Mr. Schmidt is watching it
Laaheighy begins going at the ivy with the machete, and is being attacked by it.
Gabby ffffffffrickin'... WHAT
Steph feels the music adds to the experience, rather than detracting from it
Laaheighy: GET THE PEA-PODS, GOD DAMN YOU, GET THE PEA PODS!
Forrest: ....
Gabby texas kid are YOU seeing this????? what the FRICKIN HECK
Forrest is watching it, evidently disinterested
Narrator : There is another cut.
Gabby just looks like a confused, vaguely pissed-off jaybird
Narrator : When it returns, there are two men in the shot.
Steve: Well, uh....about those pea pods....
Laaheighy: It doesn't matter!
Gabby whhhhhat the frick
Steve: Well, what're we gonna do now?
Laahehighy: ... BRING ME MY THERMIIIIIIIIIITE!
Steve: Y-Okay! But where is it?
Steph wonders if this is like, a mythbusters thing
Gabby: ...Fri... uhhhh....?
Steph making science fun
Forrest: .....
Space: would gabby like mythbusters
Laaheighy: BEHIND THE COUNTER, THE ONE FULL OF ACIDS!
Mobile L: Yes, because they don't purport to do genetics and then do this
Steve: Okay, let's just-....-PSSS- Gaaah my eyes!!
Space: but its making science fun
Narrator : Laaheighy is fighting the ivy with his achete
Mobile L: It's HERESY...!
Laaheighy: YOU SHOULD HAVE WORN GOGGLES, THIS IS A LAB ENVIORMENT!!!
AND SPIT OUT THAT GUM!
Steve: THEY WERE IN THE WASH! AAAAAGH- HACKGBACK
Gabby http://static.tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pub/images/Hannah_face_4044.png
Steve spits the gum out of his mouth, firing right at the plant
Narrator : Laaheighy grabs the gum
He just smears it in a puddle of something
And jams it into the plant, which dies.
Forrest: .....
Laaheighy: AH! Now, motto of the story, wear goggles in the lab, follow procedur
e, eh, that's it! And I'll see you next time! Looey, stop rolling. I SAID STGabby:
Narrator : The movie comes to an end.
Gabby: ...Frickin', um...
Steph: ...
Forrest: ...
Steph that was fantastic
Mac D.: http://s17.photobucket.com/user/SpasYYZ/media/65bbe985.jpg.html laaheigh
y and steve
Mr. Schmidt turns the projector off
Mobile L: Beautiful
Mr. Schmidt: I love that one.
Forrest: .....
Mr. Schmidt: Alright, class.
We will resume next time.
Gabby ...ohhhh Mr. Schmidt... Nyeheheh... you, uh... you card, you... WHAT
Mac D.: i tried doing a vocaroo with doctor weird's voice but it kept cracking a
t the best parts

Mobile L: Aww
Mac D.: i just don't got the voice for it anymore...
Mobile L: A for effort
Space: haw haw
Forrest: ....
Gabby looks back down and tries to make sense of that one problem
Narrator : Class ends, and their next one is
hm
what class haven't we had in a while
Mac D.: the sweet release of freedom
Narrator : it's not
alright, i guess history
Nurse Foxhole steps in
Forrest puts his head in one hand against the desk, bored
Forrest looks and sees- oh boy
Nurse Foxhole: RIght, uh, so...
Forrest: ....
Gabby gits reddy
Nurse Foxhole: Ms. Lao, she wasn't able to come today.
Forrest: .........
Gabby: ...Uh... Any updates on her?
Nurse Foxhole: So I'll be running history again!
Steph: ...
Nurse Foxhole: Oh, she's fine.
Just got some nasty bug, that's all.
Forrest: ...
Gabby DOUBT
Nurse Foxhole: Jeeze Louise, man, it's really busy being a sub.
Forrest makes a note to check the library again today
Nurse Foxhole: So, we're doing fun stuff today, yeah?
Remember last time, the Congress of Vienna?
Forrest still has his face bandaged the fuggup
Gabby aaaaaaaaa FRICK
Mobile L: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XzfxG6pqGE
Steph ...westphalia...
Nurse Foxhole: Well today, we're handling the unification of Germany!
Who would like to be our Otto Von Bismarck?
Forrest: ....Wait, are weSteph does not raise her hand this time
Gabby does NOT wanna be a political leader again, pls no...
Nurse Foxhole: C'mon!
Forrest: ....
Space: pick forrest
Forrest oh god no not this shit again
Nurse Foxhole: rolling 1d20
(
6
)
= 6
Forrest this is criminal
Nurse Foxhole: Forrest!
Forrest this is a war cri- god DAMN IT
Forrest: .......
Nurse Foxhole: You're going to be Otto Von Bismarck!
Come up here.
Forrest: .....Oh.
...Great.
Forrest gets up and resentfully makes his way to the front of the class
Gabby ...aw frick, poor Murrican kid
Nurse Foxhole: Now, we need someone to be Napoleon III...
Gabby:
Nurse Foxhole: Any volunteers?
Forrest: ....
Steph: ...................................................
Gabby figures she'd best toss Forrest a bone and put her own bacon on the line
Gabby HAND GO UP
Nurse Foxhole: Gabby!
Hello, you're Emperor Napoleon III!
Gabby: M'kay, frickin' A
Forrest: ....
Nurse Foxhole: Germany hates you.
Mac D.: "EVERYONE hates you, Gabby."
Nurse Foxhole: Alright, we're going to need two Austrians!
Steph: ...
Steph aw fug, everyone's going up...
Steph the reluctant handraise
Nurse Foxhole: Steph, and...
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
= 13
Gabby heckie yeah steph, TEAM PLAYAZ
Nurse Foxhole: Anton!
Steph this is okay, this is something i can live with
Gabby ...okay whew, NOT VLAD yey
Forrest evidently just wants to die by cannonfire and go back to his seat
Nurse Foxhole: Now!
We'll need various German Princedoms....
Everyone else!
The left side of the room are Souther Germans, and the right are Northern German
s!
Gabby tries to give Forrest supportive vibes even though she still kinda hates h
im
Nurse Foxhole: Now, Prussia!
Otto Von Bismarck!
Forrest repels those good vibes like he's got some kind of Grouch Barrier
Space: 'his grouch defenses are at maximum...'
Gabby frickin CHANNEL THE GROUCHINESS INTO ANGER, YOU FRICKER
Nurse Foxhole: You're the power behind the throne of Prussia, you are a staunch
conservative, and you want Germany unified under one banner at all costs.
Gabby AND THE ANGER... INTO TRIUMPH
Forrest: Uh huh. Okay.
Gabby:
Nurse Foxhole: You are Protestant, and you need to unite the various princedoms
of Germany, who all have internal politics and such.
Forrest: ..Okay.
Gabby just now realizes that oh frick, she has French blood and is being the Nap
oleon... friiiick
Nurse Foxhole: Also in your way are the Austrians, who want to keep the Status Q
uo.
Steph nods, in a status quo-ish fashion
Mac D.: breen:"THIS IS A LAWSUIT WAITING TO HAPPEN, CHILD"
Forrest: Ooo-kay.
Gabby: frick off, Dr. Breen, I CHOSE THIS
Nurse Foxhole: Northern Germany is mainly Protestant, and Southern Germany is Ca
tholic
Forrest: Mmmhm.
Nurse Foxhole: You have friends in Northern Germany, but not many in the South.
Forrest: Rrrright.
Nurse Foxhole: Also, you have Emperor Napoleon III, who all Germans dislike beca
use he is a militaristic Frenchman.
Forrest: Uh huh.
Nurse Foxhole: He may attempt to cut into Germany, but may not, that's his perog
ative.
Now, go!
Forrest: .....?
Nurse Foxhole: Unify Germany!
Forrest: ...Oh....Okay.
Steph: .......
Gabby:
Steph just stands around, in an austrian fashion
Gabby DEEP BREATH... channel the frenchness
Nurse Foxhole: fucking racist
Also there are Bohemians who are more Czech than german but have lands in German
y.
Forrest looks at his North German brothers and sisters
Nurse Foxhole: Vlad's a Bohemian.
Steph idly wonders how Foxhole knows so much about history
Vlad: Hungarian.
Nurse Foxhole: For the purposes of this exercise, Bohemian,
Forrest: ...Okay....Uh, you guys kinda stand together by those desks.
Forrest points
Vlad: No.
Nathan: Sounds good to me, man.
Gabby: ...Hey, uh, frickers. Who wants to be part of frickin' France?
Forrest walks over to the southerners
Suzie: I'm not moving anywhere.
Steph: No thanks.
Lilly: We're not dealing with Prussians! Our version of God is better than yours
!
Forrest: And, you guys stand over by those guys for like two seconds
Ken: I am afraid I lack a reason to do so.
Gabby: But do you lack a reason to be part of France?
Ken: Sadly, yes.
Steph: Go back to Paris!
Forrest: It's so Germany can be unified.
Gabby: ...Frickin'... We've got crepes and crap.
Ken: I would lose my country if that happened.
Lilly: And we have Austria to protect us.
Steph: Yeah, that's right.
Anton: Go away, Donut!
Steph: Don't listen to this, uh... chump von Bismarck!
Gabby: But maybe it'd be better, right? I mean, I'm... I'm frickin' Napoleon.
Steph: No, you're, like, his nephew.
Forrest: ....Oh, okay, you're taking this seriously.
Anton: Is funny, because Bismarck is donut.
Nurse Foxhole: Nephew yeah.
Forrest: Allllllright, then.
Steph: Yeah, good one. So... Chump von Donut!
Gabby: I'm frickin' Napoleon's nephew.
Forrest tries to think about what Mister Von Bismark did
Nurse Foxhole: Nephew who is unpopular at home.
(
4
+
5
+
16
)+1
= 26
Nurse Foxhole: And has had colonial misadventures.
Gabby: But stilllllll.
Nurse Foxhole: how the fuck would you know, forrest
Space: american
Gabby: It could be really frickin' good.
Nurse Foxhole: he probably sucked a lot of dick
Space: american trash
Forrest fuckin figures
Forrest alright we wing it
Gabby: Like, frickin'...
Forrest POINTS at Gabby
Nurse Foxhole is busying doing origami
Space: wow my reading comprehension failed
Forrest: Okay, we all agree that Napoleon sucks, right
Space: i saw what foxhole said and what gabby said
and thought gabby was saying that sucking a lot of dick could be really frickin'
good
Narrator : Everyone nods.
Gabby: :^)
Steph: Yeah, screw Napoleon.
Forrest: And Napoleon's talking about making us French and shit.
Gabby: ...What, geddout, I'm frickin'... it'd be good!
Nurse Foxhole puts an origami kaiser helmet on Forrest
Forrest: Who here wants to be French, show of hands-....
.......
Nurse Foxhole: There.
Steph: (Oh my god.)
Nurse Foxhole: Just like the real guy.
Forrest silently utters another prayer for death and keeps going
Narrator : No one raises their hand
Mobile L: Forrest r/n: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-Z4jx5VMw8M
Forrest: Anybody. Anybody want to be French here.
Guess not.
Gabby: ...You guyyyyyys.
Forrest: Well, I'm of the opinion.
That since Napoleon is such a sack of shit, he's going to force you guys to beco
me French one of these days.
Nurse Foxhole puts an origami napoleon hat on gab, origami crowns on steph and a
nton
Gabby HWOA FRICK
Forrest: Does anyone disagree with this educated guess.
Ken: We still have Austria to protect us.
Steph approves of this crown
Steph: Austria represent!
Nurse Foxhole is good at origami
Forrest: Okay, so.
Gabby: ...Frick, maybe Austria should be French?
Forrest: Would you rather have a unified force of Germany and Austria
or just Austria, when all of France comes running down here screaming for your a
ss.
Steph: We can totally take France.
Vlad: You idiot, we are Germany, we just rule the land seperately.
Gabby: Oh can youuuuuuuuuu...?!...?
Forrest: You think so?
Forrest points at Gabby
Forrest: Look at those eyes.
Steph: ...
Forrest: Those are the eyes of a madman and a monster.
Steph: That's true.
Gabby gets a VERY FRENCH LOOK
Nurse Foxhole whispers to Forrest
Gabby: frickin'*
Forrest: Here, Napoleon, show us what you can do to Austria.
Forrest takes off his origami hat and hands it to Gabby
Space: oshit i got babbage caster in FGO
Gabby: Nyehehehehehe, how d'you like THIS HUH?!

Gabby dramagically starts shredding it to little bitty bits
Forrest: Oh dear. Poor little Austria.
Gabby: I'M FRENCH, I DON'T GIVE A FRICK ABOUT ANYONE!
Steph: Oh no.
Gabby: NYEHEHAHAHAHAHAHA!
Forrest: Couldn't protect anyone.
Lilly: That's a hat.
Gabby: RAAAAAAAAARRRRRGHHHHH
Forrest: Now do you understand the full capacity of the threat you face.
Lilly: ...
Steph: Austria isn't made of paper.
Gabby frickin' puts it in her mouth and starts shaking her head around like a do
g
Steph: (oh my god)
Forrest: It might as well be, with that beast running things.
Gabby: It iff if y're N'POLEON'S N'PH'W!
rrrrrrrghhhhhh!
Forrest: Do you understand, Austria.
Vlad: You're all stupid.
Forrest: Why we must become one strong Germany.
Steph: Frankly, I think that's pretty ridiculous.
Steph takes Gabby's hat
Anton: You can not do thing, it was work right for hundred of years!
Steph tears it neatly in half
Gabby: hwWHAAAAAAT?!?!
Steph crumples up the pieces and tosses them in the trash
Gabby: ...why...
Steph: There, where it belongs.
Gabby: ...WHYYYYYY...
...WHY I OUGHTTA...!
Forrest: I see negotiations have broken down.
Anton: Get out of clump, be contries!
Steph: Yeah, what he said, do that.
Gabby hops up and tosses the torn kaiser hat at Steph's head
Gabby: NYERGH!
Steph: .......
Forrest: Oh, would you look at that.
You awoke a sleeping four foot tall giant.
Don't say I didn't warn you, Austria.
Steph: We're still doing okay.
Gabby: PEOPLE WERE SHORTER BACK THEN, FRICK EVERYONE I'M NAPOLEON'S NEPHEW!
Anton: Germans, you stand together, but not be same country.
No one want new war, France will lose.
Gabby: I can win it, I know I can...!
Forrest: What good is a bunch of idiots clumped together who can't decide on any
thing.
Steph: We seem to be doing pretty well for ourselves.
Forrest: I find the chance of one really big idiot to be much higher.
Steph: Yeah, you're a big idiot, alright.
Gabby:
Forrest: Negotiations have failed, then.
Gabby grabs up some paper shreds
Vlad: Fuck, just end it already.

Forrest: Know that you forced me to do this.
Gabby tosses them at Anton
Forrest holds up a finger gun
Forrest: Bang. Bang bang.
Anton flinches
Gabby cackles Frenchly
Steph: .........
Was this how it actually went?
Because...
Forrest: Fuck if I know, but you're German now.
Go stand with the others.
Steph: No, screw you, I was already German.
Nurse Foxhole: Fight back.
Forrest: You're Bismark German now.
Nurse Foxhole: It's a war, you don't just stand there and take it!
Steph points two finger guns at Forrest
Steph: Pew pew.
Forrest: So that's how it's gonna be, huh.
Gabby: ...You guys sure you don't wanna be French? Those guys're real losers.
Forrest AIR GAT
Steph readies an invisible rocket launcher
Forrest: Ratta tat tat.
Steph: Pshoooo!
Gabby: And they're frickin' fighting.
Forrest: Psychic Reflector Shields Woooooooooooo.
Gabby: Like chumps.
Vlad: I don't want to be French, and if you ask me again, I'm going to reenact t
he Second World War next.
Steph: They didn't have those back then!
Forrest: They didn't have rocket launchers either.
Gabby: Ahhhhh, frick you. WHO ELSE WANTS TO BE FRENCH?
Steph: That wasn't a rocket launcher, that was a cannon.
Gabby holds up TWO finger guns
Forrest: It was not you had it draped on your shoulder.
Nathan stands next to Gabby
Steph: Shoulder-mounted canon.
*cnanon
*cannon
Nathan: I'm French now.
Forrest: That's about as legit a psychic reflector shields.
Space: nathan no
Gabby: Ha! That's muh boy.
Steph: Okay, fine.
Steph mimes a normal canon
Steph: *cannon
Gabby: Now help me French the rest of these doofs.
Vlad: Fuck this, Jason, you idiot, get in the clump, it will end sooner.
Forrest: Go on. Shoot me. I dare you.
Gabby BRANDISHES the French guns menacingly at the clump

Gabby: This is a stickup.
Vlad: She wants to play.
Alright.
France.
You're German now.
Steph: ssssssssss.... BOOM
Vlad: Quick, mob her.
Forrest makes surfboard motions with his arms
Gabby: Frick not, YOU'LL NEVER TAKE US ALIIIIIVE
Space: the swarm
Narrator : They begins crowding her
Steph: BOOM BOOM BOOM
(Anton, help out my cannon volley!)
Forrest: Fwoosh woosh shoosh.
Rules of Nature.
Gabby cackles maniacally and rides the crazy train all the way to Heck
Steph: Rules of what?
Narrator : https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7mn2XgLATFA
Forrest: ...It's from a-...Forget it.
Forrest looks at Foxhole
Forrest: Look- who won this?
Gabby is COVERED WITH SCORPIONS
Nurse Foxhole: Germany isn't unified.
France is being beaten up.
Austria wins.
Space: gabby: "whattre you doing to my head..."
Steph: 8)
Forrest: ....Is that actually how it went in history.
Gabby: I REGRET NOTHIIIIIIIIING! NYEHEHEHEHEHEHE!
Nurse Foxhole: No.
No.
Not at all.
Gabby: FRANCE IS CRAZY AS FRICK.
CRAZY
Nurse Foxhole: Well, I mean.
Gabby: AS
Nurse Foxhole: France was invaded.
Gabby: FRICK.
Nurse Foxhole: And Austria satyed out of it.
But that's about it.
Forrest: Oh.
Nurse Foxhole: Germany really did unify.
Space: jasper just does not care
she's been there this whole time
Forrest: This whole thing was kind of pointless, then.
Mobile L: Judgin' u
Steph: Well, that's what happens when you start wars.
Gabby: NYEHEHEHEhehehe... hhhhokay I need to frickin' breathe, aaaaaaaaa
Forrest: Can I just go sit down now.
Gabby tries to worm her way outta the Germany pile
Nurse Foxhole: Yeah, sure.
Steph swooshes back over to her seat, proud of Austria's accomplishment
Gabby: ...Hoogh.
Forrest goes back to his desk, having evidently not had fun
Nurse Foxhole: Yeah, but that's what unifying Germany is like.
Gabby dizzily wobbles her way back to her desk, looking like she found that cath
artic
Nurse Foxhole: Only instead of Forrest.
It was a fat, bald, mustachioed Prussian man,
And instead of Steph, it was some weird, crusty, inbred Austrian guy.
Forrest has his "i want to go home" face
Nurse Foxhole: And instead of Gabby, it was a fat, mustachioed, rude French guy.
Gabby nyehehehehe, FRENCH SUCK
Nurse Foxhole begins to go over the unificaion of germany in more detail
Forrest LEEEEEARNIN
Steph again wonders how he knows all this stuff
Gabby eh... history's a'ight, I guess
Nurse Foxhole: ... Now, can anyone tell me what the war between the Northern Ger
man Confederation and the French Empire was called?
(
20
+
3
+
14
)+1
= 38
Nurse Foxhole: the Franco-Prussian War
Forrest: The Franco-Prussian War.
Space: he knew that, but not anything about otto von bsimarck
Mac D.: literal gues
Nurse Foxhole: Good!
And that war brought Southern Germany into the fold, out of fear of France.
Forrest wow he just put two descriptive words together
Gabby wipes her tie on her glasses
Nurse Foxhole: Germany won, hands-down, and Napoleon III was deposed
Gabby GOOD...
Nurse Foxhole: Germany took the two wealthy provinces of Alsace and Lorraine.
Forrest: ...
Nurse Foxhole: And France became a Republic yet again.
Steph good
Steph fuck france
(To Space): Yo, should the highway map be dark or light out
Forrest quietly ponders for a moment why everyone intuitively hates the french
Gabby yeah, FRICK FRANCE, Quebec is hecka gay
Nurse Foxhole: Now, that wraps up the talking bit of the class, open up your boo
ks, read if you need it, and do whatever questions you feel you should do.
Forrest: ....Do we have any assigned.

(From Steph): i wanna say dark out
Nurse Foxhole: No, no, work at your own pace.
(To Space): Kewl, that was my instinct
Nurse Foxhole: Do what you feel is nessecary.
Forrest: ....
Forrest WHATEVER YOU SAY B0SS
(From Steph): hockey good, if not i could always color-correct it like i do with
the town map soemtimes
Forrest keeps that book shut
Steph casually fips through her textbook
Steph *flips through
Forrest: .....
Forrest decides to take this opportunity to further his investigation
Forrest gets up and walks up to Foxhole
Gabby decides to do, like, five questions instead of three like she wanted to, j
ust because she liked that thing so much
Forrest: Excuse me.
Nurse Foxhole: Oh, yeah?
Forrest lowers his voice
Forrest: I've got a personal question I'd like to ask you.
Nurse Foxhole: Oh, uh, we can take that outside...
Nurse Foxhole heads out of the room
Forrest follows
Mobile L: He's comin' out...
Space: dramatic personal reveal music
Forrest: ...Alright....This may seem like a strange question......
Nurse Foxhole: Pssh, it's fine.
Forrest: Okay....
Forrest inhaaaaales
Forrest: Do you know anyone who lived in Belmont during the sixties.
Nurse Foxhole: Uh, let me think...
Dr. Hall...
Forrest: ......
Forrest oh
Forrest great
Mobile L: dun dun DUN
Forrest that fella
Space: oh shit
Forrest: ....I see...Alright, that was all.
Space: only one guy
lived in belmont in the sixties
Nurse Foxhole: Hey. no problem.
Space: one singular soul
Nurse Foxhole: no, h's just the only one foxhole knows
Forrest: .....Are we doing anything else this class period?
Nurse Foxhole: Nope.

Forrest: Do you think I could be excused to go see him.
Space: forrest then promptly ditches
no
Gabby hmm hmm hmmm, queystions...
Space: no don't see hall
Nurse Foxhole: Sure, sure.
Space: you're gonna die
Nurse Foxhole: ...Uh...
I mean, you should know...
Forrest: ....?
Nurse Foxhole: He's a little weird...
Forrest: ....I figured as much.
I'm only going to ask him some questions, that's it.
Nurse Foxhole: That's fine then, good luck!
Forrest nods, then HEADS FOR HALL
Dr. Hall is heading for his office
Forrest sees him and approaches
Forrest: Excuse me, Dr. Hall.
Dr. Hall: Oh? Oh, it's only you.
Come in, my office is open to all students.
Forrest: I've got a few questions to ask, that's all.
Dr. Hall steps into his office
Forrest: ...
Forrest exhales and steps in after him
Dr. Hall sits at his desk, gesturing to a chair
Gabby: (boy i sure wonder how dr. hall is doing... it's a good thing nobody's fr
icked around with him in awhile. it'd be really bad if he got ahold of another k
id)
Dr. Hall: Please, take a seat.
Forrest: ..............................................
Forrest sits
Dr. Hall: You mentioned questions, Mr. Freeman?
Forrest: Alright....I've been told you lived here in Belmont back in the sixties
.
Dr. Hall: That is true, yes, why do you ask?
Forrest: I'm looking into the mysterious explosion that occurred by the school b
ack then.
Mobile L: missssssster freeman
Space: hey mobile
Mobile L: Yeh
Dr. Hall: Now why would a student be looking into something like that?
Forrest: It's a hobby.
I was wondering if you had any personal accounts involving the explosion.
Space: on a scale of 1-10 how fuck'd do you think forrest is
Mobile L: I'd say a solid 7
Space: yeah that sounds about right
Dr. Hall: Oh, I've heard many...
Forrest: Do you remember where you were when it happened.
Dr. Hall: Why, I believe I was playing in my family's front yard...
I was very young at the time, you understand.
Forrest: ...Ah-....Yeah, I should have guessed that.
..Well, if you lived here back then, do you know anyone else who lived here that
still lives here today.
Maybe.....Someone who was around my age back then.
Dr. Hall: Only senile old men... and corpses.
Forrest: .....
Can I have the names of the old men.
Dr. Hall: I hardly see why you would want to bother poor old folks.
Forrest: Just a few questions.
Dr. Hall: Their lives are coming to an end, let them rest.
No use reliving bad memories... without an apt reason, of course.
Dr. Hall sips his tea
Forrest: ......The reason behind the explosion was never solved, right?
Dr. Hall: No, and I suppose you're going to find out?
Forrest: If I can.
Dr. Hall: You'd solve a fifty year old cold case about an explosion, where your
only witnesses are senile and that Belmont's best investigators could not solve
when it was fresh?
Forrest: Yeah. If I can.
Dr. Hall: That is quite the daunting task.
Dr. Hall sips
Dr. Hall: I treated several of these men, I'd have to review my old patient reco
rds.
Forrest: ....Alright, then. Can you tell me the names when you find them.
Dr. Hall: I'll make sure you hear them.
Forrest nods
Forrest: Thanks, Doctor.
Dr. Hall: Don't mention it, Mr. Freeman.
Please, come back anytime.
You're due a visit, anyway.
Forrest: Right. Thanks again.
Dr. Hall nods
Forrest gets up, and exits the office
Forrest: .....
Forrest returns to the classroom and sits back down
Forrest: ....
Narrator : The next class is Art
Forrest dammit i had just sat down now i gotta sit back UP.....
Steph is enjoying reading about the germans
Steph didn't even know forrest left
Forrest ohboy, art
Steph is ready to fuckin draw shit
Mr. Pink: Hey, kids!
Forrest wonder what first-grade project we're getting from Markiplier THIS time
Mr. Pink: fuck you
Today we're gonna do some shizz with Zentangle!
Anyone know what Zentagle is?
*Zentangle
Forrest: ...
rolling 3d20 +1
(
6
+
3
+
8
)+1
= 18
Space: my mom checked out a book of that from the library one
Mr. Pink: i'm not lending forrest a hand
Forrest lol idunno
Mac D.: BREATHE MOBILE BREATHE
Mr. Pink: why does no one else answer
Mac D.: space feverishly google searches Zentangle
Steph: rolling 3d20
(
1
+
15
+
5
)
= 21
It's, uh... tangled... zen??
Mobile L: Horf, soz, had to help with dishes
{(
15
+
20
+
9
)}+1
= 16
Mac D.: gabby save us
Mobile L: Mystic Vietnamese zen knowledge
???: Zentangle is a self-help art therapy practice to enhance relaxation and foc
us. Zentangle is known to many artists and craftivistas as a way to create struc
tured designs through drawing various patterns.
Steph: thanks ???
!?!: http://roccitywellness.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/05/zentangle.jpg
Space: thanks !?!
Gabby HAND GO UP
!?!: http://www.charlescountymd.gov/sites/default/files/coadmin/tourism/zentangl
e.jpg
Gabby: It's like a self-help doodle thing that makes you focus and stuff. Doodli
ng during lectures actually does help you remember stuff, so it makes, like, per
fect frickin' sense.
Mobile L: Ah shit, I actually did a lotta that without even knowing what it was
Mr. Pink nods
Mr. Pink: Very good!
Forrest: ....
Mr. Pink: Now, all of you, take nine little paper squares, and do free-style Zen
tangle on them, here are some examples!
Mr. Pink points at the corckboard, which has examples on it

Gabby PSH... this oughtta be a cakewalk
Forrest: ......
Forrest just
Forrest makes a line
Gabby rubs ye lucky coat
Steph gets to artin
{(
1
+
7
+
15
)}+1
= 8
Mr. Pink: roll finesse and spriti all of you
Steph: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + -1 for Spirit
{(
13
+
16
+
5
)}+-1
= 12
(
5
+
8
+
17
)-1
= 29
rolling 3d20
(
3
+
10
+
10
)
= 23
Narrator : Steph's lines are a bit of a hot mess, but there's passion behind it.
Forrest's line is crooked and soulles.
Forrest: much like my soul
....
Gabby: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 0 for Finesse
{(
18
+
16
+
8
)}+0
= 16
{(
20
+
17
+
6
)}+0
= 17
Gabby [dramatic Vietnamese chanting]
Narrator : Gabby's is great.
RIght before the class is going to hand it in, the bell goes.
Mr. Pink: Oh...
Forrest wow, misery really DOES make time fly
Mr. Pink: Well, uh, next time, right?
Forrest: .......
Gabby ohhhhhhm...
Forrest just stows his away in his back
Forrest bag
Mobile L: Him a turtle
Narrator : The day is now: Over.
Steph oh thank gosh
Forrest FREEEEEEEEDOOOOOOM
Forrest weighs the chances that he will be dragged into Hell and eaten today
Forrest steps outside, nursing his still-bandaged face
Forrest: ....This'll be a hell of a story to explain back home.
Gabby heads on oat as well
Gabby: ...You gonna be okay?
Teddy Reinside: Hey, kids!
Forrest: Yeah, it's just a busted n....
Forrest looks up at Teddy
Steph: ...Oh!
Gabby ohhhh frickle
Forrest: ....Oh, you.
.....Do you work here, I forget.
Teddy Reinside: They finally let me out of the hospital for real!
Forrest: ....Oh.
Teddy Reinside: No, no.
Forrest: Oh, so you were in the hospital.
This explains the pants.
Mobile L: http://i.imgur.com/2S0D87W.png
Teddy Reinside: This is the brainwashing factory, don't you know
Space: its them
Teddy Reinside: This is where they make kids drink the kool-aide!
Mac D.: it's
Gabby: ...Huh.
Mac D.: beautiful...!
Forrest: Right, yeah.
Teddy Reinside cups his hands over his mouth, shoting at Hawthorne
Mobile L: They're perfect for each other
Teddy Reinside: YOU CAN TAKE THAT TO THE BANK!
Forrest: .....
Mr. Hawthorne scratches his head
Steph: .....
Mr. Hawthorne: ... Take what to which bank...
Forrest: O-kay. Well, might as well hang around here for a bit.
Mr. Hawthorne slowly wanders off
Steph: Okay! Is that what we're... doing?
The looking around thing?
(To Space): http://i.imgur.com/W3GTtg1.png
Forrest: Looking around for what.
Steph: You know... I still haven't found my science textbook.
Forrest: Oh.
(From Steph): fuck yesss
Forrest: Okay.
Vlad: Excuse me, out of my way.
Forrest: For a second there I thoughtSteph: Oh-Steph moves
Forrest notices Vlad shlunk around like a Grinch
Vlad: Not you.
Steph: Oh.
Gabby peeps at the Vlayd
Vlad: I have some questions.
What the fuck was Liz doing with you?
Forrest: .....?
Forrest looks between Steph and Vladdy
Steph: Uh, she -- wanted to talk about something.
Forrest: ....
Gabby:
Vlad: No shit, you really are a Sherlock.
Gabby don't know what the frick
Steph: Hey, you asked.
Vlad: What did she want to talk about, because she doesn't fuck around with a bu
nch of brats unless it's important.
Forrest: ....Well shit. Who's this lady, your boss.
Gabby: ...Yeah, who the frick?
Vlad: Fuck off, I'm not talking to you.
Forrest: True, but I'd like to know regardless.
Vlad: maybe space should post
Steph folds her arms
Steph: I don't think that it's any business of yours.
Vlad: We'll see.
Vlad tucks his hands in his pockets and alks off
Vlad: Whatever.
Steph: (Jackass...)
Forrest: ....
Forrest: Wow, what gang shit are you wrapped up in.
Vlad: I got her off your ass, and this is my thanks.
Bitch.
Vlad continues walking
Steph: I guess a lot?
It doesn't matter.
Gabby: ...What crawled up his butt and died?
Ken: The way he spoke was abominable...
Forrest: Maybe they're a couple.
Gabby: Yeah, no frickin' kidding... That fricker, I dislike him.
...So he knows some lady?
Like, what happened?
Forrest: Yeah, I'd like to know that too.
Did you get involved in some street war yesterday.
Steph: Fuckin', uh, Liz Rubik. She saw some kind of light show like a day or two
before and wanted to know what the fuck.
Gabby: ...Like, related to you?
Forrest: What's a light show have to do with you.
Steph: When I say 'light show,' I mean...
Y'know.
Forrest: ....Oh. Okay.
So who is she, does she go to this school.
Steph: No, she's from another school.
Forrest: Huh. Okay.
Gabby: ...Yeah, y'know. Maybe she and Vlad are fricking.
Or she's, like, his weed dealer. Some crap.
Forrest: Maybe he thought she was flirting with her.
Does she look like the type who swings both ways.
Gabby: ...Nyeheheh, ohoh frick, like... Like a lez?
Steph: Oh my god this is really not important?
Can we just -- do something else now.
Forrest: Bi, but close enough.
Gabby: Ohhhhh frick, Steph, frickin'...
...Buy what?
Gabby lol, sheltered
Forrest: No, B-I. Bisexual.
Gabby: ...Wait. Wait, like... gay, but also not gay?
Forrest: ....Yeah, sure, let's go with that.
Gabby: Is that really a thing?
Forrest: Yeah. I mean, there's a term for it, so.
Gabby: ...That's... It's not just an America thing?
Steph: Jesus Christ...
Forrest: .......Oh yeah.
Just another one of the great American traditions.
Baseball, Apple Pie, Guns, and Bisexuality.
Ken: ...
Gabby: ...Nyeheheheh! Friiiiick, all the dang crap I never even hear about...
Forrest: So are you going to go look for your science book or something.
Steph: Yes! Thank you.
Forrest: Okay, good luck with that.
Steph: ...What do you mean, good luck with that?

Forrest: Because if shit doesn't go south, I'm headed to the library.
...What do you think I mean.
I'm wishing you luck in looking for your science book.
Steph: Okay, when I say, 'I'm looking for my science book,' I mean...
Forrest: .....
Gabby: ...Uh, Steph? Am I... Am I missing a thing?
Narrator : Everyone has left, besides the gang. and two people on the shore.
Gabby leans in and whispers
Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks over shorewise
Gabby: (you don't need a pad or something, do you?)
Narrator : They're talking.
Steph: No, Gabby.
Forrest: .....Huh.
Steph: I don't.
Gabby: (okay, 'cuz I have 'em in my bag. then what is it???)
Narrator : Neither of them seem particularly happy.
Steph: I mean, like... do the thing we always do? After school?? You know???
Forrest: .....
Steph: It's a euphemism.
Narrator : it hasn't happened
you fucking idiot
Space: you're the idiot
Gabby: (...ohhhh! but, like, everyone here's in the know, so why'd you...?)
Space: fool
Forrest: ...Wonder what got the Nurse down.
Gabby: ...Eh?
Steph: It's important to be-What?
Forrest gestures to the shore
Gabby: ...Is he broken up about the Prussia crap? I thought it went well and he
liked it.
Steph: Whatever it is, it's probably something personal.
Forrest: I don't know, maybe he prefers historical accuracy.
Gabby: ...Ms. Lachance, too.
Hm.
Forrest: You're right, it probably is something personal.
Excuse me for a moment.
Gabby: Yea... Uh...?
Steph: Yeah, you do... uh, you do that.
Forrest walks over to the bottom-left table and just HAS a sit
Gabby: ...Hope he's quiet.
Narrator : has a shit
Gabby: ...Y'know.
...I think I maybe don
*don't hate him that much.
Forrest: .....
Nurse Foxhole: ... It's like it used to be...
Forrest: ...?
Steph: Who? Forrest?
Ms. Lachance: Fuck off, Jamie.
We're not doing this again.
Forrest: .....
Ms. Lachance: I don't fucking pity you, and I don't want your fucking pity, eith
er.
Gabby: Yeah. He's frickin'... he's weird, and he's kinda crabby, but like... I d
on't think he's bad.
Forrest: .......
Ms. Lachance: Just leave me alone.
Nurse Foxhole: ...
Steph: He's not bad, just, like... fuckin', um, infuriating.
Y'know.
Nurse Foxhole: ... I...
Nurse Foxhole sighs
Nurse Foxhole walks off
Forrest: ..........
Forrest looks at Lachance
Gabby: Yeah, but, like... That's 'cuz he's foreign and also maybe because he doe
sn't know how to do crap with people. I think maybe, he could be somebody if he
wanted to.
Ms. Lachance sits down on the sand, looking at the sea
Forrest: ....
Forrest do i dare
Forrest: ..........
Space: who dares, wins
Ms. Lachance sighs
Forrest sure why the fuck not
Forrest approaches THE BEAST
Ken: He means well.
Gabby: Yeah, he does. I mean, he's not frickin' vacant upstairs or anything. He
could probably go to college and study something in STEM.
Nathan: Maybe he's mean 'cause he's fat...
Forrest: Excuse me, Ms. Lachance.
Steph: I mean, I trust him and all.
Teddy Reinside: I, uh, well, if nothing is happening, I'll be off making some im
portant things happen.
Gabby: ...Y'know. What if he is? I mean, everybody gives fat guys crap and all,
right?
Teddy Reinside: Stay smart, kids, the truth is out there!
Teddy Reinside rushes off
Steph: Wait, What important things?
...Oh.
Gabby: ...Oh, okay, Teddy. Be carefu
Teddy Reinside: YOU'LL SEE!
Steph: Oh, god.
Gabby: ...Nyeheh.
Ms. Lachance doesn't look at him
Gabby: ...Like, even my Grandma, people give her crap all the time, and it sucks
, and I dunno how she doesn't get ticked.
Ms. Lachance: Piss off or I'll smash your teeth in.
Forrest: Well, okay.
Forrest does not piss of
Steph: People have different ways of dealing with stuff.
Nathan: I'm gon' let him know it's okay.
He's just big-boned, that's what they say, right?

Gabby y'know how sometimes it really shows that gabby is a small kid in a big ki
d school? this is evidently one of those times.
Steph: It'd... probably be a good idea not to bring it up.
Gabby: ...Uh, yeah. Just, like, don't go telling him that. Yeah.
Ms. Lachance: I told you to piss off.
Forrest: And I refused. And this is the part where you smash my teeth in.
Gabby: ...I'm just frickin'... I'm just gonna be as chill with Forrest as I poss
ibly can and see if that helps.
Ms. Lachance: You want dentures, you little shit?
Forrest: I'm hoping the bandages will cushion the blow somewhat.
Lilly is silent, somewhat just expecting to be welcomed into the gang
Lilly: ...
Rather odd isn't.
Gabby: Because... Because I know now that when people... Hm?
Steph: ...
Gabby looks at Lilly
Mobile L: My computer has 51 mins of battery left and I'll probs pass out around
then, just an FYI
Mac D.: STRENGTH
Mobile L: Been up since 6 tho
Forrest continues to stand there
Mac D.: you're a strong independent texan woman mobile
Space: believe in yourself
Mobile L: I gotta channel all that black-eyed pea power into my soul...!
Mac D.: THAT'S THE SPIRIT, COWGIRL
Space: [texan national anthem plays]
Mobile L: Yeeeeeeehaw!
:)
Mac D.: meanwhile our canadian has died of frostbite
Mobile L: eldy pls, we love you
Space: we'll have to commandeer this roll20
Steve: i'm the hero now
Space: steve lives
Steve: let's go fight the aliens kids
Mac D.: btw i am steve
do not have false hope
Space: god damn you duff
Mobile L: :^) https://40.media.tumblr.com/f75d2d051aac94f8e4ed999e7ce12bcb/tumbl
r_mqiu019qrL1ro9w48o1_540.jpg
Space: oh no
Mac D.: i have prepared the ritual to bring seer back https://www.youtube.com/wa
tch?v=7LxITlJplhw
Mobile L: I hope it works
the pain
Space: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zT6OeBeWT8g
Mac D.: it's okay
he will return i have faith
Mobile L: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Gan_FsqVqw
Lilly: i'm back
Space: oh my go
they speak english in Yee
Mobile L: YEE
hallo eldy
Mac D.: ARISE, CHICKEN
Ms. Lachance: What do you want?
Forrest: ...To be honest, I'm still trying to come up with that.

Lilly: That, well, all of this craziness happens, and we're going on like it's j
ust normal business. I feel like that's a good attitude.
Gabby: ...Honestly, it took me awhile to be able to do this.
Forrest: I mean, I was going to ask you about coffee and making it and whatnot,
but I figured that would be cheating so that wouldn't go anywhere.
Then I was thinking of asking about that conversation a few seconds ago, but we'
re total strangers to each other, so that doesn't seem right to talk about.
Steph: We have to do it. Life goes on, with or without all of this... this weird
shit.
Forrest: So I decided that the image of a teacher sitting on a beach alone in fr
ont of all her students is really depressing.
So I figured if I stood over here and talked to you, that would look better.
And that's what I came up with.
Gabby: ...And hey, you seem to be catching on pretty well. Nyeheheh...
Ms. Lachance: You shouldn't have.
I like being alone, I don't have to listen to any stupid fucking kids.
Or a bunch of slack-jawed idiots too busy fucking each other to do their God dam
ned jobs
Lilly: I'm green, is the reason, I don't really understand much of this myself.
Gabby: ...Well, I'd say you'll learn soon enough, but, uh... the stuff doesn't s
eem to be happening right now.
Forrest: ...I always figured being a teacher was a huge pain.
Lilly: Well, here's hoping, then!
Ms. Lachance: It is.
Steph: ...
Forrest: .....
Gabby: Yeah...
Forrest: ...I'm sorry about riding you about that debate stuff in class today.
Steph: It's, uh...
Ms. Lachance: I don't care.
I don't know why you'd apologize, either.
Steph: ...It's a nice day out.
Lilly: Oh, but isn't it, though
Forrest: The other teachers seem fairly gung-ho about their assignments, I didn'
t expect you to be different.
Ken nods
Gabby: Really is... Nyeheh. Still got this dang coat on.
Gabby takes it off and awkwardly drapes it o'er her shoulder
Suzie: It seem a little hot for a coat.
Gabby: Yeah, but you never know.
Forrest: So that was my bad.
Ms. Lachance: ...
Steph: ...It's a nice coat.
Ms. Lachance: You should leave me alone.
Mobile L: fug, 17 mins of babbery
Ms. Lachance: I... I don't like you.
I don't like anyone.
Forrest: I'm used to not being liked.
Mobile L: Ms. Lachance :,(
Forrest... :,<
Suzie: ...
Space: social link will form
Ms. Lachance: ...
Ms. Lachance hasn't looked at him this whole time
Ms. Lachance doesn't respond
Forrest: ...
Nathan: ... Man, I'm hung- IT'S FRIDAY!
Mobile L: tmi, Nathan
Space: nsfw
Nathan whoops, pumping his arms in the air
Steph: ...Oh shit, it is!
Gabby: ...Wait, really? Frickin' already?
Ms. Lachance: Thanks.
I don't know why you're visiting me.
But thank you.
Ms. Lachance checks her watch
Ms. Lachance: ... I don't want to miss my movie...
Ms. Lachance stands up
Forrest: Hope it's good.
Lilly: Oh, excellent, that's great...
Lilly sighs in relief
Ms. Lachance: It probably isn't,
Ms. Lachance walks to the bus stop
Space: i feel bad for ms lachance
Forrest watches her walk off
Forrest: ....
Forrest walks back to the other kids
Steph: ...?
Oh, how'd it go?
Mobile L: Me too
Suzie whistles Rebecca Black's Friday to herself
Forrest: Fair. What'd I miss.
Mobile L: fuk yes Sooz
Battery's almost ded
Suzie: you're almost dead
Steph: It's Friday.
Mac D.: godspeed, womun
Suzie: the battery is your life
Forrest: ...Oh-..Right, yeah.
Good, that means I got time to work.
Gabby: ...Is, uh... Ms. Lachance okay?
Steph: ...
Forrest: She's fine. She was just waiting on the bus to go see a movie.
Gabby: ...Okay, good... Hey, uh... Thanks for checking on her.
Lilly: Right, well, I'll be off, I want to check out that new skate-board park t
hey're opening!
Gabby: ...Ooh, heck yeah! Have fun, Lilly.
Forrest: Mm.
Lilly: Oh, will do!
Lilly jogs off, excited
Steph: ...Well, uh...
...
Steph did not actually make any plans
Mobile L: 6 minnitd

Mobile L: *minnits
Space: nooo
Narrator : What can seven people do for fun in a city?
Forrest: ....What's up, don't feel like finding your book.
Narrator : Or what can one person do on a Weekend?
Steph: That was a euphemism.
Gabby FRICKIN' MATH PROBLEMS AND PIANO PRACTICE
Narrator : Or what can seven people do for fun on a Weekend?
Or What can seven people and one shapeless demon do for fun in general?
Forrest: So do you not feel like being eaten by demons or what.
Steph: ...
Not... right this moment, no.
hey there pal
Forrest: Allll right.
Mobile L: Yo, y'all keep goin', but I must depart here
Space: goode nite
Forrest: I'm going to the library. You enjoy your Weekend.
Mobile L: G'night, friends/romans/countrymen
Mac D.: rest well
Mobile L DIES FOR MANY YEARS
Narrator : oh also
Steph: What're you going there for?
Space: ominous silence
Forrest: I'm doing research.
Space: oh
positive silence
Narrator : Something something Social Link
Something something person- err Archetype
Steph: ...
Forrest: who pinned this plastic chain to my shirt
Narrator : Something Something NUMBERS
Steph keeps in mind what they said while talking about Forrest
Narrator : RANKU WAN!!!!
Steph: Mind if I tag along?
Forrest: .....Did you need something at the library, too.
Steph: Well... not really. But I've got nothing better to do.
Forrest: ..........
....Alright, but don't blame me if you get bored, though.
Narrator : you're a last resort, forrest
the social link is broken
Steph: Okay, that's fine.
Forrest throws the plastic chain at her face
Narrator : steph and forrest now have RANKU MINUS WAN!!!!!!
Forrest says "see yu" to the other kids and starts for the Library
Steph does much the same
Narrator : Steph and Forrest go to the Library.
Forrest WEEEEEEEe
Steph: Okay... what are we looking for?
Forrest: I have some books on the town's history and local legend, already.
I also wouldn't mind.....Some books on the growth or brewing of coffee, and some
stuff on the anatomy of pigs.
Richard Moneypenny walks in

Forrest: ....?
Steph: .....
Richard Moneypenny: to the library
Forrest looks over at THE MONEYPENNY
Steph: ...Ugh.
Forrest: ....Know him?
Steph: Yeah.
He's just a douche.
Forrest: Did you ride his bus, too.
Richard Moneypenny: no but sshe wishes she could ;)
Steph: What?
Forrest: He has a bus.
I rode it home yesterday.
Steph: ...Jeez...
Forrest: Though now that I think about it, the bus was probably stolen.
I think he's an escaped con.
Steph: No, we just ate at his Chinese restaurant.
He had, like, this really racist fake costume and stuff.
Forrest: Wow, he owns a restaurant, too?
....Well shit, maybe he is the mayore.
Steph: Did he say he was the mayor?
Forrest: Yeah.
Richard Moneypenny isn't the mayor
Forrest: ...Forget it, let's head inside.
Steph: Jesus.
Yeah, okay.
Richard Moneypenny immediatly ambushes them
Forrest: ....
Steph: ...
Richard Moneypenny is dressed
Richard Moneypenny is dressed as an old, stereotypical librarian lady, with a wi
g and makeup
Forrest: .......
Richard Moneypenny: Oh, hello, me young dearies...
Steph: What the fuck.
Richard Moneypenny: I'm afraid but because children these days do not visit us e
nough, we have begun to exact entrance fees to the library...
Fifty dollars, from each of you...
Forrest: ......So I guess bus driving doesn't pay like it used to?
Richard Moneypenny: Oh? Whatever could ye mean, dearie?
Forrest: .....
Steph: How's the restaurant going?
Steph folds her arms
Richard Moneypenny: What resteraunt...?
I'm simply Phyllis Greene, the humble libarian.
*librarian
Forrest: .....Uh huh.
Richard Moneypenny: So pay up, me dearies...
Richard Moneypenny stretches out a hand
Forrest: .....

Steph: I can give you, like, a dollar.
Richard Moneypenny: Give me- me fifty dollars...
Forrest: Do you have private libraries in Canada.
Steph: This one isn't.
Forrest: Okay, so if this is a government-funded library, then why do you need m
oney from the public.
Richard Moneypenny: Oh, we don't get enough...
Soon, we'll have to start burning the books...
Forrest: From the government.
Richard Moneypenny: Yes...
Forrest: To the point that you have to ask for fifty dollars at the door.
Richard Moneypenny: Yes, it's a sad state of affairs...
Forrest: I'm surprised with such a crippling lack of funds, you manage to keep t
he place in such pristine condition.
Steph: Look, just go bother someone else.
Richard Moneypenny: Oh, you know how it is, I just slave all day, develoRichard Moneypenny is shoved into
Richard Moneypenny by Richard Moneypenny
Forrest: ...............
Steph: ...???
Richard Moneypenny: Ooff, oh me back!
Steph: ????????
Forrest: .........
RM2: Hey, watch it, bitch!
God damn old people, always getting in my way...
Forrest: ..........
Steph looks at forrest again, deeply confused
RM2 looks at Steph and Forrest, is surprised, looks back at the old lady for a m
oment, then gains an angry expression
RM2: So, fucking this poor old lady, huh?
Forrest looks at Steph with his usual expression
RM2: First you fuck me, and now the old lady.
Forrest looks back at Richard
Forrest: Excuse me.
RM2: Is there anyone in this town you're not above fucking?
Steph: ??? ??? ?? ???? ? ? ????? ?
RM2: I got my resteraunt, uh, closed down!
Forrest: Oh.
RM2: And it's your fault, you little, err, shits!
Forrest: Did you lose the bus, too.
RM2: Y-yeah, in the war!
Forrest: ....What war.
Steph: What war.
RM2: The war, that I fought in!
Forrest: You mean the war that took place between yesterday and today.
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, oh me back...
Richard Moneypenny? falls over
Forrest looks down at the frail old moneypenny
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, there be a disk out of place, oh Lord, spirit, help me.
.
RM2: Shut up, you old bitch!
Steph: ...Can we go now??

RM2: Fuck, you, I'm gonna show you what happens when you fuck with me.
Forrest looks at RM2
RM2 reaches into his coat
Forrest: .......
Forrest so this is how i die
Richard Moneypenny? leaps up and punches RM2 in the dick
Richard Moneypenny?: No, not the kiddies!
Forrest: ...........
Steph: ...........
RM2 crumples, clutching hsi sack
RM2 's voice cracks a bit as he speaks
RM2: OUgh.... youl... fucking... asshole...
Richard Moneypenny?: Get out, ye trash!
Richard Moneypenny? tosses RM2 onto the street
Forrest: ..........................................
Steph: ......
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh...
Oh, me back...
Forrest looks back at Old Miss Moneypenny
Richard Moneypenny?: Me joints...
Oh, me everything...
Forrest: ......
Steph: ...Should we... call a doctor??
Richard Moneypenny?: Are ye kids alright...?
Forrest: ...Yeah, let's call a doctor.
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, no, no, kiddies, don't other yeselves...
I've lived through worse...
Forrest: Well I mean if you're in crippling pain.
Richard Moneypenny?: Just give me ye fifty dollars and I'll be able to sit down.
..
Steph: ...
Forrest: No, no. The hospital call should come first.
There's a phone in the building, right.
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, just use your cellphone, kiddie...
Forrest: You know, I thought of that, but I'm afraid it's out of juice.
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, that's terrible...
Steph: I... left mine at home...?
Forrest: But we can't possibly ignore your pain.
Richard Moneypenny?: Our phone is on the old fritz again...
Forrest: Oh, that's fine. Hotwiring landlines is one of my hobbies.
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, alright, kiddie, follow me...
Richard Moneypenny? begins limping
Richard Moneypenny? heads into a back room
Richard Moneypenny? it's dark
Forrest stands at the doorway
Forrest: Funny place to keep a phone.
Steph: ...
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, sh- dear, oh, where's the lightswitch, m- oh...
Forrest: Here, let me.
Richard Moneypenny?: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Finesse
{(
17
+
7
+
5
)}+3
= 10
Richard Moneypenny? hits their knee on a table
Richard Moneypenny?: OH DEAR, ME JOINT!
ME JOINT!
is forrest going to do something
Forrest: .....
Forrest pulls out his cell phone and turns on the light function, shining it int
o the room
Forrest: How about that. That better.
Richard Moneypenny? looks aat him
Richard Moneypenny?: ... Ye said it was out...
Forrest: ...Oh, well would you look at that, seems there's some left.
You wait in here, I'll make the call.
Steph: ........
Richard Moneypenny?: Oh, no, dearie.
Richard Moneypenny? begins walking out
Forrest: No, no, I insist.
Forrest shuts the door
Richard Moneypenny?: I don't like the dark room.
Steph: You really shouldn't move around so much...
Forrest turns to steph
Forrest: Alright, let's go.
Richard Moneypenny? opens the door
Richard Moneypenny?: ...
Steph: ......
Richard Moneypenny?: You have made.
A very.
Serious.
Mistake.
Forrest looks at Richard
Richard Moneypenny?: Don't move a fucking inch.
Forrest: ....And if I do.
Steph is about to say something
Steph but "What are you gonna do, shoot us?" is like the most famous last words
ever
Richard Moneypenny?: You don't want to find out.
Forrest: No, please.
Richard Moneypenny?: Do you know how much fucking effort I put into this?
Forrest: Tell me what you plan to do to us, in this public institution, filled w
ith all these people.
Steph: It's a pretty, uh... ridiculous con.
Richard Moneypenny: We're in the back rooms, you shithead.
Forrest: Correction.
Richard Moneypenny: Let me be blunt.

Forrest: You're in the back room, I'm standing out here.
Richard Moneypenny: I got a fucking body double.
I put on this stupid fucking makeup.
I set everything up just to make some money.
Forrest: I have to admit, getting the body double was impressive.
Richard Moneypenny: And you decide to shit all over it.
Couldn't have just given me my fifty fucking dollars.
Forrest: I don't understand why you couldn't have just stuck to driving the bus.
Steph: Dude, screw you, I don't even carry money with me.
Richard Moneypenny: I got caught, dumbass!
I don't have a licence!
Forrest: Should have let me pay you, then.
At least then you would have had some of my money.
Richard Moneypenny: But it doesn't matter now.
Empty out your pockets.
I'm taking everything I can.
Forrest: Or you'll do that horrible thing to us, right.
Richard Moneypenny: Don't push it.
I like you, kid.
But don't make me angry.
Steph: No.
Richard Moneypenny: No?
Is that your final answer?
Forrest: I can respect the determination it takes to go to absurd lengths to con
children, but I rather like the change in my pocket.
Steph: I mean, really...
Richard Moneypenny reaches his hand into his dress
Richard Moneypenny: Last chance.
Forrest: Did you really expect people coming to the library to just have fifty d
ollars in their pockets.
Richard Moneypenny: I said, last chance.
Forrest narrows his eyes
Forrest: Alright, then.
Do it.
I want to see how I die.
Steph: ...Jesus Christ.
Richard Moneypenny pulls out a knife, shoves it into Forrest's hand, and then tr
ies to make Forrest stab him
Forrest: ....!
Richard Moneypenny: roll something to not do so
Steph: ...................
Forrest tries shifting his body so his arm is shoved past Richard and not into h
im
(
9
+
12
+
6
)-1
= 26
Richard Moneypenny: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Brawn
{(
10
+
9
+
4
)}+3
= 12
Richard Moneypenny yanks his hand in so he gets sstabbed
Richard Moneypenny: OH!
AUGH!
AUGH!
Richard Moneypenny begins bolting past them
Forrest: .....
Steph: ...
Richard Moneypenny: HELP, HELP ME!
I'VE BEEN STABBED!!!
Forrest: ....Wow.
That was actually smart.
....
Forrest: ...You should go.
Richard Moneypenny: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, SOMEONE, HELP ME!
Steph: That won't work, he saw me.
Forrest: If nobody else does, you're better off.
Richard Moneypenny: IT WAS THAT FAT CUNT KID!
Forrest starts walking towards the door
Richard Moneypenny: HELP!
Steph: Well...
Let's just sort this all out.
Forrest: Gonna be hard.
Richard Moneypenny: His little child protstitue, she helped him!
She held me while he stabbed!
Forrest walks out, hearing this
Forrest: ...Oh, wow. Really?
Richard Moneypenny: Call the police, call 911 now!
Steph follows
Steph: That, um, that's not actually what happened.
Richard Moneypenny: AUGH!
SHE'S COME TO KILL ME!
HELP!
JESUS
PLEASE!
Richard Moneypenny tries rushing past the crowd
Forrest: .....
Steph: ...
Tabitha St. Marie: ... No, sir you can't go mYSTORY!1
Forrest looks at the crowd
Forrest: .....Anybody know where I should put this.
Narrator : Richard is thrown back into the ibrary
And nto Forrest
Forrest HOOF
Steph is just
Tabitha St. Marie: MY STORY!
Steph instantly, utterly regretting sticking around
Tabitha St. Marie: EVERYONE FREEZE.
DON'T CALL THE POLICE.
Forrest: ....Excuse me, if I could say my peace for a mSteph: Do you want an actual, live, eyewitness account?
Tabitha St. Marie: I NEED TO CONDUCT INTERVIEWS!
Steph: I saw the whole thing! So, uh-Tabitha St. Marie jams the mic in Steph's face
Forrest: Okay, if I can justTabitha St. Marie: What did you see!?
Forrest looks down at Richard
Forrest: ...
Steph: He gave the knife to Forrest and made him stab him!
Forrest: ....You want your knife back?
Richard Moneypenny is grinning up at him, mouthing
Richard Moneypenny: "Fuck you"
Forrest: Yeah, think i'll just...
Forrest sets it down on the nearest table
Steph: See, because, he was mugging us, but we didn't have any money.
Forrest looks at Tabitha
Tabitha St. Marie: What?
WWWWWWWWwhat an insane role reversal!
Forrest: Yeah, he was dressed up like a librarian, asked us for fifty dollars at
the door.
Steph: It's a stupid con, honestly!
Forrest: ...Actually, hang on.
Forrest goes to pull the wig off Richard
Sherwood Cotter: ... I did find it odd, that a librarian asked me for- fifty dol
lars!? I payed on hundred!
Richard Moneypenny has the wig pulled off
Forrest: ...Oh, wow.
Richard Moneypenny: Fuck you, I'm transsexual!
Forrest: He actually DID lower the price for our age.
Richard Moneypenny: Bigot!
Bigot!
Steph: Hey, fuck off!
Forrest: Of course you are-... Here.
Richard Moneypenny: Fucking bigotry!
Forrest shows the wig to Tabitha
Forrest: Evidence.
Tabitha St. Marie snatches it
Steph: Jesus Christ... yeah, look.
Tabitha St. Marie: Good!
Talk more, this is gold!
Steph: He's got a history of these kind of bullshit cons, too.
Forrest: If you look around town, there should be another guy who looks like him
.
Forrest looks down at Richard

Forrest: Wait, should you being busted for that bus shit be on your criminal rec
ord?
Steph: He... owned a fake Chinese restaurant, he ran a fake bus service without
a license...
I bet it would be!
Richard Moneypenny: .... Suck my asshole!
Richard Moneypenny begins trying to escape
Forrest: Yeah, I think we've got a solid defense.
Richard Moneypenny: rolling 1d20
(
3
)
= 3
Richard Moneypenny is clotheslined by the old fat lady
Mac D.: fuck yes
obaasan
Eunice Trn: And stay down... you little devil...
Forrest: ......
Eunice Trn: What a terrible boy...
Forrest looks at Tabitha
Forrest: Okay, can we call the cops now
Tabitha St. Marie: No!
I need more information.
Forrest: ....
Steph: Uh... tell him about the bus.
Forrest: Oh, right.
Steph: *her
Forrest: He stole a bus and pretended to be a bus drive.
Sherwood Cotter: ... Oh, he's trying to escape again
Forrest: He got caught for that, sooo.
Sherwood Cotter just starts smacking the dazed form of Moneypenny, who isn't try
ing to escape
Sherwood Cotter: Aha!
I am stopping this fiendish criminal!
Tabitha St. Marie: I see...
Anything else?
Forrest: Well.....
She mentioned the restaurant.
And you have the wig.
I guess if you wanted more evidence, you could get that dress off him.
Tabitha St. Marie begins trying to snap a picture of this while Forrest talks
Tabitha St. Marie: How about the stabbing?
Forrest: Oh. He shoved a knife in my hands and shoved my arm into his chest.
Tabitha St. Marie: Ohhhh....
Alright, you can call the police, whatever...
Forrest: Alllllright.
Tabitha St. Marie begins basically beating Moneypenny with a mike, asking him qu
estions
Forrest NINE WUN WUN or whatever the fuck it is in your frozen wasteland of a co
untry
Tabitha St. Marie: it's 911
Steph: ((Uh... Forest, we might want to go after the police get here.)
Forrest nine wun wun it is then

Forrest: .....I guess we can find some other place to read.
Narrator : Eventually the police show up, question everyone, and take Moneypenny
away in custody, acting like this is pretty normal.
Steph: ...Oh.
Forrest watches justice be done
Forrest: ........
Richard Moneypenny: I FUCKING HATE YOU KIDS!!!!
Forrest: ....I get the feeling we'll be seeing him again.
Narrator : The library quickly returns to order.
Forrest: ...Yeah, think I'll just quietly strike this whole thing from the recor
d in what I'm going to tell Mom and Dad what happened today.
Steph: That'd be for the best.
Anton: ...
Are.. two, you all good?
Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks over at Anton
Forrest: Oh, hey.
Steph: Yeah, we're fine now.
Anton: Is good, was a weird thing.
Forrest: Yeah.
Anton: What you come to library for?
Forrest: Oh, I'm looking into the town's history.
Steph nods
Forrest: I'm interested in learning about an explosion that happened near the sc
hool back in the sixties.
Apparently no one ever figured out what caused it.
Anton: Oh, is very spooky, yes?
Steph nods
Steph looks over at Forrest
Forrest: Yeah, so I'm trying to figure out what happened.
Steph: We're-- trying to figure it out.
Anton: I, uh, wish you a good luck in it.
Forrest: ....Oh-...Right, she's helping out.
Steph: Thanks, Anton.
Anton: You not need mention, is fine.
Forrest: Thanks. Don't take any buses driven buy dudes in cuffs.
*by
Anton: I won't.
Anton returns to his seat
Forrest: ....Alright, so. Let's find ourselves a cozy spot.
Forrest looks over at the left side of the building.
Steph: Yeah...
Forrest: ...How about over here.
Tabitha St. Marie sits next to them, hurridly noting things in a little red book
Tabitha St. Marie wears headphones, listenign to recordings
Tabitha St. Marie is generally very busy
Steph: ...Yeah, sure.
Forrest: .....She a reporter?
.....
Tabitha St. Marie hears him past the headpgones
Tabitha St. Marie: Best one in the business!
Forrest: .....Oh.
Steph: She came to our school a while back.
Tabitha St. Marie: I'm Tabitha St. Marie, and if you need something reported, I'
m your gal!
Forrest: Oh, huh. Over what.
Steph: The... disappearances.
Forrest: .....Oh.
Right. Yeah.
Tabitha St. Marie: I wasn't very well recieved, sadly, but don't working, this t
ime I'm getting my permit...
Forrest: ......Oh, so you're freelance.
Tabitha St. Marie: Yes!
Keeps me hungry, and that's what you need to stay alive in the business...
Forrest: ......
Okay, well, good luck on.....whatever you're working on.
Steph seems to have a mild, vague dislike of this woman
Forrest: ...?
Forrest sees the HATRED in steph's eyes.................
Tabitha St. Marie: Your story, of course!
Forrest: ....Oh- Right.
Tabitha St. Marie: You're going to make me a nice story, thanks!
Forrest: ....No problem.
Forrest goes to pull out his BOOKS, looking at Steph
Forrest: Alright, do you want the history book, or the legend book.
Steph: Uh... legends.
Forrest: Alright.
Forrest passes her that book and cracks open the history one
Forrest: Lemmie know if you find anything interesting/
Steph: Ten-four.
Narrator : THE LEGEND OF THE WENDIGO STATES
no
it's not that
Forrest begins to dive deep into this book on a mission to uncover the KNOWLEDGE
WITHIN
(
9
+
19
+
20
)+1
= 49
Steph searches as well, in this fine literature
{(
3
+
19
+
2
)}
= 3
Mac D.: steph's knowledge sub is leaky and of poor quality
Space: she gets sidetracked easy
Narrator : i mean
i do't know
what to give forret here
what
specifically
is he looking for
Narrator : Steph gets distracted reading about Wendigos
Mac D.: stuff relating to the explosion, or anything about mysterious bullshit i
n general
Steph: ...Geez...
Forrest: ...?
You find something?
Steph: Wendigos are creepy. Do they have stories about them in America?
Forrest: .......
....Yeah, they do.
Narrator : She also finds folklore about Raven, Bush Indians, the Gguux, The Woo
d Man, etc, etc.
http://www.native-languages.org/ahtna-legends.htm
Steph: A lot of this First Nations folklore is really cool.
Forrest: See anything that remind you of what we saw.
Space: aw
Narrator : Forrest finds, in this tome, finds some interesting accounts of the e
xplosion.
Space: i'm reading about the ahtna
Forrest: ....?
Forrest REED
Space: there's only 500 of them left it says
Steph: No... nothing is jumping out at me.
Forrest: ShhForrest is reading the accounts in-depth
Narrator : "As I woke up, there was this tremendous rumbling, a horrible noise.
I looked up the window, and by God it was a fire, a rumbling fury like I had nev
er seen. The building was nearly demolished, and I don't know what could have po
ssibly caused such an explosion... the noise, the noise was the worst part. It w
as some... I suppose, at the time, I thought it was unearthly[...] roaring, shri
eking, awful sounds."
Forrest: .....
Steph: ?
Steph looks back up at Forrest
Narrator : The building was later demolished, and the school portion of it was r
ebuilt. The other part of the building, was a convent, then a hospital, then sim
ply unused, was abandoned.
Levelled.
Forrest starts copying the text down in his notes, turning the book slightly to
Steph
Forrest: Look at this. Here, and here.
Steph looks, reading it
Steph: ...
That is... a lot more relevant than whatever I was reading.
Tabitha St. Marie: roll mind
Mac D.: just her or both of us

{(
11
+
13
+
18
)}
= 13
Tabitha St. Marie: both
(
18
+
5
+
11
)+1
= 35
Tabitha St. Marie is leaning over Forrest's shoulder, reading along with him
Forrest: ....?
Forrest looks at her
Forrest: ...Excuse me.
Tabitha St. Marie: That's some pretty spooky stuff, huh?
That's a cold case...
Forrest: ....Yeah. Spooky.
Steph: We're, uh.....
Forrest: So I've been told.
Tabitha St. Marie: When you're done with that book, mind letting me take a look.
..?
Steph: Just checking this local stuff out...
Tabitha St. Marie gives big puppydog eyes
Steph: ...
Forrest: ......
...I haven't finished it. I'm going to have to keep it a little longer.
Tabitha St. Marie: When you're done, of course.
Forrest: Right, when I'm done.
Would you let us know when you're about to read over our shoulders next time.
Tabitha St. Marie: There's not fun in it that way.
Forrest: .....
Tabitha St. Marie gives a sly, shit-eating smile
Forrest mildly annoyed expression
Tabitha St. Marie leans back to her own work
Forrest: ...
Forrest looks back at Step
Steph: ...
I don't like this, but...
Forrest: ...?
Steph: ...
I mean, she's a reporter. She has connections.
Tabitha St. Marie: I can hear you.
Steph: Oh my god.
Forrest: Are those things even on.

Tabitha St. Marie: No, I turned them off three minutes ago.
Forrest: ......Shoulda figured the first time....Alright, listen.
We're looking into solving this cold case.
Tabitha St. Marie: And you need some heeeeeeeeeeeeeeeellllllllllp?
Forrest: ......
Forrest EXHALATION
Forrest: .....Yeah, we wouldn't mind help.
Steph: Yeah...
Tabitha St. Marie scoots a little closer
Tabitha St. Marie: Tell me more.
Forrest: Not much more to tell, we're just interested in solving the mystery of
the explosion.
Steph: Like, if you want to publish it or whatever... we don't even want our nam
es on it, we just want to know the truth.
Forrest: Yeah, credit's yours.
Tabitha St. Marie grins
Tabitha St. Marie: What's mine is yours, what's yours is mine, yeah?
Steph: Yeah, that.
Forrest: ....Yeah.
Tabitha St. Marie: Alright, partners it is...
Forrest: Let's start as "accquaintances" and work our way up, okay
Steph: It's fine if you call it whatever, he's just a grump.
Tabitha St. Marie: I'll tell you anything I learn, you tell me anything you lear
n, we do stupid things together for the story, it'll be marvellous!
Forrest: Please don't land me in prison.
Tabitha St. Marie: No promises.
Steph: It'll be fine, probably.
Forrest: .....
....Fine. Alright, I'd show you the passages we found, but I'm sure you already
read them while we weren't looking/
Tabitha St. Marie: Guilty as charged~
roll mind
{(
14
+
17
+
6
)}
= 14
(
12
+
6
+
4
)+1
= 23
Tabitha St. Marie: steph
your notebook is missing
Steph: ...?
Forrest: ....
Steph: Hey, where's-- what the heck?
Tabitha St. Marie: Looking for these?

Forrest looks back at Tabitha
Tabitha St. Marie pulls out her notebook and somhow Forrest's, apparently having
nabbed them in like the ten seconds he's been looking away
Steph: Hey, give that back!
Forrest: .........
Steph tries to snatch it away
Forrest: ....Okay, yeah, don't do that anymore.
Tabitha St. Marie let's her take it
Forrest takes his notes back
Steph so, so so close...
Steph needs to learn to write in code or some shit
Steph quickly stuffs it in her backpack
Forrest: ....But that skill of yours could be extremely useful.
Tabitha St. Marie: Oh, you shouldn't have...
Steph looks really unhappy now, but says nothing
Forrest glances slightly at Steph before looking back at Tabitha
Forrest: ...Alright, we're going to need names of witnesses to the explosion who
're still alive, and blueprints of the school building from 1960 and onward.
Tabitha St. Marie: I'll do what I can do.
Forrest: ....I'm confident you won't disappoint.
Steph: ......
Steph double-checks that her notebook is still there
Tabitha St. Marie: it is
Forrest: I'd like to reiterate the whole "don't land me in prison" thing.
Tabitha St. Marie quickly packs up her things
Tabitha St. Marie: I'll be seeing you.
Forrest: ....Right.
Steph: Nice talking to you.
Forrest: When can we expect to see you again.
Tabitha St. Marie: Tomorrow, anyway.
I don't know when I'll turn everything up.
Wait...
What day is it...
Forrest: Friday.
Tabitha St. Marie: Oh, shit, well, you'll see me Monday!
Forrest: ....Alright. See you.
Steph: ...
Tabitha St. Marie: Toodaloo!
Tabitha St. Marie rushes out at the speed of sound something something GOTTA FOL
LOW MY RAINBOW
Forrest: ......
Steph: ...Jeez...
That was too close.
Forrest: ....I hope I haven't made a horrible mistake.
Steph: ...What the fuck am I supposed to do if, like, someone grabs my notebook?
Forrest: ....
Forrest: ....You could keep it on your person as often as you can.
Steph: That's what I do already.
Forrest: Well, I mean holding it.
You could also just leave it at home locked away someplace.
You know, like a diary.
Steph: What if I need it?
Forrest: You could write things down as you go and staple the pages in your jour
nal when you get home.
Idunno, I'm just spitballing here.
Steph: Where would I get the paper from?
Forrest: I doubt many people are as good at swiping things as she is, though.
.....Oh-...
Why not chain it to yourself.
Steph: That's some fuckin', like, goth crap right there.
Forrest: Do you want to not look kind of silly or do you want to make absolutely
sure your notebook can't get swiped.
Steph: It'd just raise eyebrows. People'd wonder what I've got that's so importa
nt, so it'd be the first thing they'd go for.
Forrest: Least you'd see them coming.
Or feel them coming.
Steph: I'll just keep doing what I'm doing.
My backpack's safe.
Forrest: Alright, whatever floats your boat.
More importantly, what do you think about what we found.
Steph: We didn't find a whole lot. At least not anything groundbreaking. It's sp
ooky stuff, but we already had that idea.
Forrest: I want to learn more about that other half our building's apparently mi
ssing.
Steph: There's, like, the part of school that no one uses anymore. Maybe that's
related too.
Forrest: .....There's an abandoned section of the school.
Like, literally.
Steph: You've been there before.
Forrest: ....Well then, I know where I'm going back to.
Steph: Well, don't do it today.
Forrest: What's the matter, losing steam.
Steph: I don't know where everyone lives. Just, like, Gabby and Jaime.
Forrest: ......?
What's that got to do with it.
Steph: I don't think we should go there with just the two of us.
Forrest: ......Okay, hang on. Are we talking about an abandoned part of school,
or that school.
.....
Forrest forrest remembers something
Forrest: ......
Forrest looks around from where he's planted for Ms. Lao
Steph: You go to one to get to the other. That's, like, what I'm saying.
Forrest: .....There a portal there, or something?
I thought it just randomly happened.
Steph: I don't know how it works, okay?
You wanna go there?
Forrest: Hang on...

Forrest is still scanning for the Lao
Tabitha St. Marie: shes there
Forrest: ......
...Hm.
Steph: What?
Forrest: ...Nothing. Let's go.
Forrest gets up from where he's sitting
Steph gets up, putting her backpack on
Forrest puts his books away and exits the liburry
Steph follows the forrest
Forrest: Alright, make your decision, we checking out the abandoned bit or not.
Steph: Let's go.
Forrest: Alright then.
Forrest starts making his way BACK TO SCHOOLGROUNDS
Steph walks after 'im
Mac D.: one steph
two steph
Space: look duff
it's the lunatic
i circled him for your convenience
Mac D.: ohhhhhh nooooooooooo
Space: i forget
does forrest know about him
Mac D.: he does not
lunatic was before his time
Space: do YOU know about lunatic
Mac D.: a liiiitle bit?
Space: nyeyeyeheheheheeehehehehe
Mac D.: seer on a scale of one to ten how dead are you
Space: hey duff listen to my music until seer gets back
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a39YktBYSbU
Mac D.: what is this shot-on-shiteo nonsense
Space: that's like a fake music video
its also like the only youtube video with this song
Mac D.: damn
Space: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KHw7gdJ14uQ here
Narrator : On the way to school, they walk into thw two doctors, again!
Steph: ...Oh!
Dr. Venter: Oh!
Forrest: ....?
Dr. Venter: Graham, look!
Forrest remembers these two old biddies talking about HALL
Dr. Venter: God, are you alright, child?
Dr. Graham awkwardly stands there
Forrest looks at Venter harangue Steph
Steph: Uh-- yes, thanks. Um... no, everything's going fine right now.
Dr. Graham: ... That's good...
Forrest: ...
Dr. Venter: We were terribly worried, with that thuggish cop and that degenerate
racist, we feared the worst.

Forrest: .........
Forrest what kind of felon IS this girl
Steph: What about you guys? We, ah, didn't really get a chance to catch up after
...
Uh, I forget, have you met Forrest? He's new.
Forrest: Hi.
Dr. Venter: Oh, hello, young man!
I am Dr. Venter, this is my friend, Dr. Graham.
Forrest: Nice to meet you both.
Dr. Graham nods, stiffly
Dr. Venter: We got out unscathed, thank goodness...
We haven't seen either of those animals since....
Forrest: ...........
....I'm a little out of the loop here, what happened.
Steph: It's a long...ish story. You remember that guy? Richard Moneypenny?
Forrest: The guy who tried to frame me for murder an hour ago, yeah I saw him.
Steph: Yeah, him.
Dr. Venter: ...
Steph: Um... that should really tell you all you need to know, honestly.
Forrest: ...Think I'll just fill in the blanks, yeah.
Dr. Venter: ... You poor, poor children...
Steph: ...Uhm.... These two are kinda helping us out.
Forrest: I see.
Dr. Venter: Yes, if you need anything, we are right behind you!
.......
......Can I ask you about someone.
Steph: ...?
Dr. Venter: Oh, me? Sure
Forrest: Doctor Hall.
Dr. Venter: Oh, him...
Dr. Graham: We're not on good terms.
Forrest: I overheard the two of you talking about him in the library yesterday.
Dr. Graham: Then I believe you understand the nature of our relationship.
Forrest: He was having some sort of heated discussion with our principle today,
as well.
Steph: What's his... um, deal? Do you guys know?
Forrest: Does he have some sort of reputation.
Dr. Graham: HDr. Venter: He is a sick man! He derives pleasure from seeing people squirm!
Steph nods
Dr. Venter: He is a sham therapist, he does not seek to better the human conditi
on, simply to revel in all its faults.
Forrest: ...
Forrest looks at Dr. Graham
Steph: Yeah, that's... that's the truest thing I've heard all day, honestly.
Forrest: ...Has he been....accused of anything.
Anything criminal, I mean.
Dr. Graham: ... Yes, actually, he could be prosecuted for an unrelated aspect of
his career.
Forrest: ...What is that.
Dr. Graham: Somehow, despite technically being a practicing therapist, under the
employ of the British Columbian District of Health, he is on the local Board of
Health, the overseeing committee for the region of Belmont. This is not allowed
, and yet he holds his position.
Steph: ...
Forrest: ....I see.
Steph quickly fishes out her notebook
Forrest: I wonder how he manages that.
Dr. Graham: It is clear that there is some for of illegal coercion going on, and
I am hesitant to bring it to any authority, on the chance that his influence sp
reads farther than that.
Steph: The board of health....
Forrest: ...Hang on.
Steph: ...Shit.
Steph scrawls something quickly in there, then places it back in her backpack
Dr. Graham: ... What...?
Forrest scribbles out some notes of his own, then looks at Steh
Steph: The Board of Health is... I think there might be something there.
Dr. Graham: ruddman's on the board of health too, remember, steph
Steph: I'm not sure if we should be talking about this out in the open.
Forrest: .....
...We could head to one of our houses.
Talk there.
Dr. Graham: It's fine, we're not in some Orwellian world, I see no problm in tal
king here.
Forrest: Better safe than sorry.
Steph clearly looks uncomfortable w-Steph: ...Is that...?
Forrest: What.
Steph: Hey, wait!
Forrest: .....?
Steph goes after the lunatic
Forrest: .....Wait where are you......Okay, she's gone.
......
Forrest moves at a casual pace after her
Space: the chill walk
Lunatic stares at them, brandishes his baseball bat
Forrest: You wanna explain what that was about.
Lunatic: ...
Steph: Wait! Wait...
Forrest looks over Steph's shoulder
Steph: Easy, easy... you helped me out. There's no need for that, okay? I won't
come any closer.
Forrest: Who's this guy.
Lunatic: Not now.... GRMMRRGH.... WASTING MY TIME!
Forrest: ....
Lunatic turns
Lunatic every step is just a lurch forward, as if his body does not want to move
Steph: (Motherfuck...)
Please! I need to talk to you!
Forrest: ....Are we going to- Okay
Lunatic: WASTING MY TIME!
I'LL KILL YOU!
Steph: .......
Lunatic begins shrieking and howling, waving his bat around
Forrest: .....Hey, woah. Okay, now.
Steph: Okay, okay, that's enough of that!
Dr. Venter: Get away from him, kids!
Forrest: Don't wave that thing around like that, you're gonna bean somebody.
Lunatic is just acting like a territorial animal
Steph: (Jesus H. Christ...)
Lunatic snarls
Steph: Okay, Forrest, I don't think he wants to talk!
Forrest: What tipped you off, the screaming or the bat-waving.
Steph: This is really not the time!
Lunatic bolts off when they begin talking to each other
Forrest: ...Uhp.
Steph: Come on, let's just let him-...Oh.
Forrest: ....Wonder what he was in such a hurry for.
Space: theres two stephs
Mac D.: i told u
Space: goodbye steph
Mac D.: one steph
two steph
Vlad is looking down the alley at them
Forrest: Maybe he was off his tits on something.
...?
Steph: ......
Forrest looks down the alley
Vlad: What the fuck.
Forrest: ...Oh, you.
Don't mind us.
Steph: Oh my goooooood!
Vlad: The fuck is wrong with you people.
Steph is just exasperated at this point
Forrest looks back at the others
Steph: Okay, whatever. I don't even -- I don't even care, at this point.
Forrest: ...Okay, so we were talking about crashing at somebody's place.
Steph: Yeah, screw it. Sure.
Dr. Venter: Oh, we can't!
Forrest: What's wrong, you busy with something.
Dr. Venter: Yes, actually.
We both work odd hours.
Forrest: Oh. Okay.
Steph: Okay, can I just get your phone numbers or something?
Dr. Venter: Sure, sure!
Dr. Venter exchanges number with them, as does Graham
Forrest nod
Steph initiates number-exchanging procedure
Steph: Okay, thanks.
Dr. Venter: Remember, we're behind you!
Forrest: Gotcha. Thanks.

Steph: We really appreciate it.
Dr. Graham: Good day.
Space: this song is nice
Steph: ...Okay, what now.
Forrest: Well, you can start by telling me what the issue is with the Board of H
ealth.
Steph: You know those snake guys?
Forrest: Snake cult, yes.
Steph: Their boss is on the board.
Forrest: ....
Forrest writes THAAAAAT down
Space: brb for a sec
Forrest: ....What exactly does the Board of Health dictate in this town.
Steph: Oh, I have no idea. I'm sure that the doctors know and stuff.
Space: seer no...
Mac D.: seer yes
eldritch s. (GM): https://www.sog.unc.edu/resources/faqs/what-does-local-board-h
ealth-do
Forrest: .....We probably should ask them soon as we can.
eldritch s. (GM): only replace
county
with
"health region"
Steph: Yeah.
...
Forrest: ...
eldritch s. (GM): now kiss
Steph: Do you have any money?
Forrest: ....?
Forrest checks his pockets
Forrest: ...I've got, like.....twelve bucks, why.
Steph: I'm hungry.
Forrest: ........
....Are you bumming a meal off me.
Steph: C'mon, I'll pay you back.
Forrest: ..........
.....Alright, fine.
Where can we go on a twelve-dollar budget.
Steph: I dunno, McDonald's or something.
Forrest goes to look for the cheapiest piece o shit he can find
eldritch s. (GM): McDonalds is there
Forrest WE GOING TO MICKEY DEES
Steph aaaw yeh
Narrator : ew
mcdonalds is gross
Forrest: what a shame if only i had more money
Narrator : poor people
Steph and Forrest buy a meal at McDonalds, the cashier is some sunglasses clad t
een, one who is legit just fucking smoking at the counter.
Forrest: Okay, thanks.
Lucy: Eyyy, don't worry 'bout it.
Forrest gets OUTTA THERE and goes to sit on a bench
Narrator : He sits on a bench.

Steph: ...
Narrator : Shits on one too
Steph sits on the bench as well
Steph: ew
Forrest bought himself some gatdam chickie nuggs and fries
Steph got a burg
Steph and a coca-cola
Narrator : steph you have trash taste in pop
Steph: :c
Forrest dips a nug in honey mustard and eats
Narrator : oh
i thought
you sai
normal mustard
i was about to say something
Mac D.: yeah i bet you did
Space: haha
Forrest: ....
Steph: This is...
I mean, it's okay.
Thanks.
Forrest: That's what twelve dollars gets you/
Steph: It's better than no dollars.
Forrest munchmunchmunch
Steph: How are you liking Canada, anyways?
Forrest: Well, I certainly have a lot more to do here than I did back at my old
hometown.
Steph: Not just that... I mean our culture, and our way of life.
Forrest: I have noticed absolutely no difference.
Steph: Here in Canada, it's just a nice place to be.
...I don't know why, I'm just feeling nationalistic all of a sudden.
Forrest: It's probably that male choir down the street.
Steph: Like this... sudden upswell of patriotic pride.
Where?
Forrest: Over there
Steph looks
Steph: Oh, those guys.
That's probably it.
Forrest: Yeah.
Forrest eats with that same tired face he always has
Steph: ...
Forrest: You should see Jersey sometime.
We got one of those con man guys on every block.
Steph: That must be, like... literal actual hell.
Narrator : an endless supply of richard moneypenny
Forrest: You learn how to deal with them
Steph: Do they all have knives?
Forrest: Most of them had handguns.
Of course, they usually kept their hands off them in my neighborhood.
Forrest bites into a new nugget
Steph: Why's that an 'of course' thing?

Forrest: Well, my neighborhood was the exception. Had to be more careful when I
left it.
Steph: Did you ever have to have a gun?
Forrest: We have a couple, but I've never touched them.
Steph: Oh... so you don't know how to shoot them?
Forrest: Nope. My Mom asks if I ever wanted to learn, like, once a year, though.
Steph: I have one at home. One of the snake guys dropped his.
Forrest: ........You pulled a gun off the street.
Steph: Arrows didn't work on him, I had to improvise.
This was before we had the-- you know, the whole thing.
Forrest: ...Right, I get you.
Why'd you keep it.
Steph: It was just a sort of... reflex thing, we had to get out of there fast.
Forrest: I see.
You should probably find a place to get rid of it. You don't want to be caught w
ith it.
Steph: What if I get caught while I'm trying to get rid of it?
Forrest: Well then that's just shit luck.
Steph: It'd be shit luck either way it happened.
Forrest: I'm sure you can turn it into authorities or something.
Steph: You, uh, you really shouldn't trust the cops.
Forrest: Better yet, hand it off to my Mom. She'll know what do with it.
Steph: Where's your mom?
Forrest: Idunno, probably still at work, doing who-knows-what.
Steph: What time does she get off? We could go right now.
Forrest: Uh.....She might be home by now, I'm not sure.
Steph: Just call her or something, dude.
Forrest: .....Right. Duh.
Forrest pulls out his phone and gives Mum a call
Loren Freeman: Hello, Forrest!
How's my little boy doing?
Forrest: Hey, Mom. I'm doing good....Listen, are you home right now?
Loren Freeman: Oh, no, sorry, Forrest, I'm going to be pulling an all-nighter to
night.
Forrest: ..Ah, okay.
Be safe. Sorry about that.
Loren Freeman: Oh, don't worry, Forrest, I'm just happy you called.
Forrest: ............
Loren Freeman: Love you, Forrest.
Forrest: .........Love you too, bye.
Forrest hangs up
Steph is giving Forrest a knowing look
Forrest isn't looking
Steph: Awww.
Forrest: .....What.
Steph: Nothing!~
Forrest: ....
Forrest annoyed look
Forrest: ....It's no good. She's gonna be working all night tonight.
Steph: That's too bad. Maybe some other time.
Forrest: I'll tell her about it next chance I get.
Steph: How are you gonna do that? "Hey, this girl in my class needs to ditch a s
tolen firearm?"
Forrest: I'll tell her we found it just lying on the street
Steph: Well, that's true.

Forrest: I wasn't involved.
Forrest DELICIOUS CHICKEN FLESH
Steph smiles, before sipping the coca-cola
Steph: Okay, so what's next on the Scooby Doo agenda?
Forrest: ....
Forrest annoyed look again
Forrest: Well, we still haven't checked the abandoned part of school.
Steph: Okay, lemme finish my soda.
Forrest: Mm.
Forrest num num num
Steph siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiip
Forrest: ........
Steph continues in that fashion in silence
Forrest: ......You really should have left the library when that happened.
Steph: Why? It worked out pretty okay.
Forrest: Still. Worst case scenario would have been only I would have been arres
ted.
Steph: Yeah, and what happens when he tells the cops that I was there, too?
Forrest: Well, you wouldn't have left much evidence of that, depending on how go
od you were at getting out of there.
Only my hands were on the knife, after all.
Steph: Sure, but... that wouldn't have been very friendly to a newcomer!
Besides... I'll bet you a buck fifty you'd do the same thing for me.
Forrest: There's a difference between you and me, though.
Steph: What's the difference?
Forrest: You have a life worth living out of jail.
Forrest closes up his nugget box and stands up
Steph: ...
Forrest: ...Alright, you don with your drink?
Steph: ...Yeah! Yeah, I'm done.
Um, thanks again.
Forrest: I'm going to hound you until you get me that money back.
Steph goes to toss her beverage in the disposal unit
Forrest tosses his box away as well
Steph: Good, that way I won't forget. Lead the way.
Forrest starts HEADIN FOR THE SCHOOL
Narrator : They head to the disused part of the school, specifically the old sha
ck attached to it, in that small, narrow area with pipes and shit.
Forrest: oh hello literally everyone
Steph: Okay.
Forrest: Do they still use this place for storage?
Narrator : roll mind for that answer, steph
{(
13
+
1
+
20
)}
= 13
Narrator : Yeah, you've seen Foxhole go in and out of here sometimes when they n
eed shit.
Steph: Yeah, uh... a few times.
Forrest: Figures, what else would you use it for if you weren't gonna knock it d
own.
You've been here before, right? How thoroughly did you search it.
....?
Narrator : It's raining outside.
Forrest: .....Ah, great.
Steph: Not... super thorough.
Forrest: First thing on the list to find: umbrellas.
Steph: ...
Forrest: Alright....Let's look around, see if we find anything of interest.
Steph: You got it.
...
Forrest: .....
Forrest: What's up.
Steph: Nothing, I'm looking.
Forrest: .....
Steph goes to look around
Forrest starts the comb the area
Narrator : It's a pretty normal, disused storage area.
Roll mind.
(
13
+
12
+
3
)+1
= 29
Narrator : steph you bitch
{(
13
+
13
+
2
)}
= 13
Narrator : Forrest notices that the green metal door seems... unusually corroded
Forrest: .....
Narrator : And Steph finds a package, sandwiched under a box
Steph: ...?
Narrator : Through the door lies the boiler room.
Forrest: ......
Narrator : Well, an old one.
Steph pulls it out
Narrator : Not one in used anymore.
*use
Forrest: ....Take a look at the door over here.

Narrator : It is labelled "For Jamie"
Steph: Hold on a second...
Forrest: ...?
You find something?
Steph: Yeah, it's for Foxhole.
Forrest: .....?
Forrest walks over
Steph: Come look at this.
Steph is the package such that it could be opened and no one would notice
Narrator : It hasn't been here long.
It's like wrapped in brown paper with tape and shit, no
Forrest: ...Looks like it was put here recently.
Steph: Yeah.
What should we do?
Forrest: Open it, duh.
Steph: ...Okay.
Steph moves to cautiously open it
Narrator : It's full of money.
Forrest: .......
Steph: ...
This is...
What the hell is this?
Forrest: .....Payment.
The question is, for what.
Steph: Drugs. Or something shady.
It's got to be, right? I mean, look at all this.
Forrest: Could be.
He could also just be selling porno mags or something.
Steph: Well, I'm pretty sure Vlad gave this to him.
Forrest: Whatever it is, he clearly wants it hidden.
What makes you say that?
Steph: 'Cause I saw him just straight-up blatantly give it to him.
Forrest: Money?
Steph: This box. Or one like it.
Steph tries to cautiously put it back together
Forrest: ....I see.
....Let's keep the package.
Narrator : finesse
Forrest: We'll take it to Foxhole or Vlad, whoever we find first.
{(
10
+
4
+
1
)}+1
= 5
Yeah, this... this isn't working.
Narrator : She fucks it up, it looks wrong.
Steph: Look, there's nothing tying this to Vlad. He can just claim 'Oh, I don't
know what the shit.'
But, like, Foxhole is good friends with Moneypenny. Maybe they're both into some
dangerous crap, and they'll shoot us or something.

Forrest: .......All this information would have been useful earlier.
Forrest jots down NOETS
Steph: ...What the fuck.
What was that?
Forrest: What was what.
Steph: You didn't hear that?
Forrest: Hear what, I was writing.
Steph just shoves the packet into her backpack, grabbing her notebook
Steph: ...
Steph mouths 'Don't move'
Forrest: ........
Steph: .........
Forrest: ....................
Lunatic: YOU... CAN'T....
I NEED TO FIND IT, I
Steph mouths 'We have to go'
Forrest: .....
Steph tries to quietly sneak her way out
Iblis grabs his throat
Iblis: One too many times.
Forrest tries to glance back at what's behind him
Iblis: You called Him.
Now I shall exact payment.
Forrest: .......
Forrest very quickly joins Steph in the sneaking
{(
4
+
5
+
1
)}+1
= 5
Space: nooOOOOo
Forrest: .....
Iblis turns to look at then
Steph: Shit!
Steph up and bolts
Forrest: ....Ahhh-..Great.
Forrest runs after her
Iblis gives the neck one last suqeeze
Iblis watches them run
Steph bolts out the door an outside

Forrest follows quickly behin
Iblis: i'm lazy
Steph doesn't stop running until they're clear away from the school
Steph rests against the wall for a moment
Forrest eventually comes to a stop and hunches over, heavily panting and coughin
g
Steph: Hhh... god fucking damn it.
Forrest: I....-WHEEZE-....Wasn't built.....-WHEEZE-....for this olympics shit...
..-WHEEZE-...
Steph: Dude... you're alive. Be thankful.
Holy shit...
Steph deeply exhales
Forrest: Uh huh, yeah.
Forrest eventually catches his breath
Narrator : Iblis probably crushed that man's neck.
Forrest: Well.....so much for THAT guy...
Steph: He saved my life.
He got -- he got the cop away from me long enough to run. Back when all of this
started.
Forrest: He seemed not all that fond of you earlier today.
Steph: He was crazy. He attacked the school....
...Now we'll never know who he was.
Forrest: ....Well, I mean...The body could still be there.
Steph: I'm not going back.
Forrest: .....
....You held onto that package, right.
Steph: It's in my backpack.
Forrest: Okay, least we got that.
.......
....The door to the boiler room, there.
It was corroded.
Like, seriously eaten away.
Steph: ...
Forrest: .......
...I'm going to have to go back there sooner or later.
Steph: Yeah.
Not now.
Forrest: Yeah, not with the insane demon hanging around.
.....God, I'm soaked.
Steph: It rains a lot here.
Forrest: Yeah, thanks.
.....We just gonna stand out here in the rain, or.
Steph: Okay, where do you want to go?
Forrest: What is open and closest and dryest.
Forrest goes to THAT place
Narrator : The library.
Steph follows
Forrest: Full circle, how about that.
Narrator : hurry it along, mein gott
Forrest walks over under the archway
Forrest has a sit

Steph sits down across from him
Forrest: .....
Steph: .....
Forrest: .....Wonder when it'll let up.
Steph: We might be stuck here.
I mean, if you mind the rain.
Forrest: Never liked it.
Steph: I like rainstorms.
Forrest: Can't stand them.
......
.....Do we have each other's cell numbers.
Steph: Uh...
Steph checks
Steph: Yyyyeah.
Forrest: ....I forgot when we exchanged them.
Steph: Like, at lunch.
Forrest: ....Oh-...Right, I remember now.
.....
Saw Ms. Lao here again.
Steph: ...
How was she?
Forrest: Pretty sure how you would expect.
Steph: Oh.
Forrest: .....I was curious if I'd see her here again, today.
Steph: Does she just come here a lot?
Forrest: Hell if I know, I've only been here twice.
....How many days has been out of school, so far.
*has she
Steph: I don't know... a good amount.
Forrest: In a row?
Steph: Yeah.
Forrest: .....
....Town's just full of fuckin' mysteries, isn't it.
Steph nod nod nod quickly
Steph: It's fucked up.
Forrest: .....Well.
Just means I'm going to be busy for a while.
Steph: I'm really glad that you're, like...
Committed to this.
Forrest: You kidding. This is the most exciting life's ever been for me.
Steph: Not a whole lot of people would like... y'know, this kind of exciting.
Forrest: This is exactly what I wanted.
Steph: Well, then it's a good thing you guys moved here.
Forrest: Yeah.
.......
.....What do you think of this Third Heaven business.
Steph: I don't want to come up with anything concrete yet. It's...
We barely know anything as it stands.
Forrest: You're not wrong.
Still, the hypothetical is interesting.
A door to Paradise, where all your wishes come true..
Steph: I don't have any wishes.
Forrest: That so.
Steph: Yeah, that's so.
Forrest: Guess that means you're already in Paradise.
Steph: ...
Forrest: ....To be honest,
.
Steph: Dull?
Forrest: Yeah. Where's the
Steph: I don't know. It...
Forrest: Yeah, so why live
and no offense, but something like that seems....dull

passion in a life without want of anything.
the passion is in getting there, or something.
in a world were you already have it all.
Steph shrugs
Steph: ...I think it's more important to...
Get answers. Or just to get all of this to end.
Forrest: That's where I find my passion. Answers.
There's a thrill to discovering the truth about something, good or bad.
Steph: Well, as long as we keep doing what we're doing, then I have a feeling th
at we'll find your passion.
Forrest: ....Yeah....(and then).....
Narrator : calling it
Space: good sesh
Mac D.: seer must be dying horribly
Space: oh dear
it's the Void again
Mac D.: d e a t h
Space: there's the high roller
Lunatic 's neck is crushed, their limp corpse lies on the floor, in a pool of bl
ood
Lunatic thrashes back into life
Lunatic will not die
Lunatic: ... FIND.... IT....
KILL... IT...
STOP...
Lunatic devolves into bestial, gutteral sounds
Mac D.: GOOD SESH
Space: that poor fucker
Narrator : any thoughts on what in particular happened
Mac D.: INTRIGUE AND MYSTERY
Space: i think that
lunatic just gets progressively more fucked in the head the more he dies
probably the money is drug money
Mac D.: i think that lunatic is being animated or controlled by some outside for
ce
my bet is that the money's porn money
Space: complete spitballing: maybe mu is getting more control over the lunatic t
he more times he brings the lunatic back to life
Mac D.: i feel like even after spending an entire day together steph and forrest
's relationship has not advanced an inch
Space: duff you missed this but after the lunatic attacked the school there was
a scene that none of the characters saw, where he like crumbled into ash after a
sking for mu to lend him power or somesuch
Narrator : no
he never
turned to ash
he just fell to the ground
Space: shit did he just die
damn
Mac D.: interesting
forrest will not die
Space: where on earth did i get that ash from

Mac D.: not until he gets his twelve dollars back
Narrator : i said he crumpled to the ground, maybe you mistook that to crumbled
Space: oh yeah i think that's it
Narrator : a lot happened in that session
Mac D.: i loved it
Narrator : i'll have to give gabby and jaime a grand old adventure
Mac D.: this is without a doubt my favorite roll20 atm
i just picture steph laughing like a noblewoman going "i grow bored, FEED ME, fo
rrest"
Space: new goal for steph: acquire free food from as many characters as possible
over the course of this campaign
Narrator : what do you think foxhole and lachance were talking about
Space: romance
Forrest approaches steph's house with a nail-studded baseball bat
Narrator : imagine those two like on a date, someone would get shanked
Mac D.: romance and/or perhaps stories of the old days....
when they too were Heaven's Heroes
Space: is that like hogans heroes
Forrest: so, uh, steph
Narrator : only with mr mu
Forrest: where the fuck's my money
Steph: this is a nice song
Forrest: on the next episode steph gets me my fucking money or her legs get brok
en
ain't that right STEPH
Steph: i got your money
right here
Steph whips out a 9mil
Forrest: aaaaaaAAAAAAAH
Forrest KRAKK
Steph: YIPPIE KAY AY MOTHERFUCKERRR
Steph BAM BAM BAM
Space: i forget
does duff know what happens if a PC dies
Forrest: I WILL NOT DIE UNTIL YOUR DEBT IS REPAID
Mac D.: is it like a doo
*dojo
don't you say a fuckin word
Space: i don't have to
Mac D.: or is it like SMTIV
Narrator : no
mu will offer to revive them
and i'll roll a die to see how badly he fucks it up
Mac D.: where you're in line to get on Charon's boat and he's like "fuck it i do
n't want to deal with this fucking paperwork bribe me and you can go back"
oh shit
what are fuckups in the revival process like
Narrator : like gain minus one to a stat
Space: i think we've seen one already
Narrator : gain plus one
we might work to find a new token for them if you deign to
Mac D.: forrest would probably just straight-up say nah
Narrator : and also ~other consquences~
oh he's not offering the dead one
he's offering their living companions
Mac D.: oh deary me

Steph: don't forget
you're here forever
Narrator : naomi
Mac D.: forrest would be very bitter at whoever revived him
Narrator : you still need to make the call
Steph: yes
Narrator : what are your pcs leaning on
Space: steph's going to say yes i think
she feels deeply responsible for naomi's death
Mac D.: forrest is definitely against the idea
because he doesn't like the idea of bringing back someone potentially super fuck
ed up
Steph: you just don't like it when people are living
do you
forrest
you goddamn murderer
Forrest: she came back without fucking limbs steph
she was screaming to be killed again what is wrong with you
Narrator : what do you think will happen if she is revived
Mac D.: knowing our luck: the worst shit possible
does the revived remember being dea
Narrator : i am looking at her revived self now
yes
because he just
Space: no face
Narrator : grabs their soul
Mac D.: oh okay so forrest would not be pleased
Narrator : and crudely jumbles together a body
Forrest: which one of you assholes did it this time
Space: what is being dead like
Forrest: steph when i say "don't bring me back this time"
WHAT do you think that means
Narrator : you get trapped outside of the third heaven
in tartarus
Mac D.: is it an unpleasant experience
Narrator : with billions, literal billions of other wailing souls
trying to get in
yeah it's incredibly unpleasant
Mac D.: forrest is just sitting in the back of the crowd like
Forrest: seriously guys can you calm the fuck down
i'm trying to read here
Narrator : sometimes nihilists grab the souls
and drag them into cocytus
Forrest: oh that must be fun
Narrator : it's just great
Forrest: can't wait to see what that shit's like
Mac D.: do you fully expect one of us to die over the course of this game
Narrator : it's possible
i won't
go out of my way
but there's a plan
Mac D.: i c
Narrator : there are
a lot of mysterious
Mac D.: so how potentially crude a body reconstruction are we talking about here
Narrator : things
like if you want
we'll find a new freaky token for your pc
and it varies
Space: how would they be able to

Narrator : sometines mu gets it pretty right
Space: like go around in society
Narrator : or better
oh, theyd have a challenge
Mac D.: if you get resurrected in a horrible shit body can you be like "nah we a
in't doing this"
Narrator : mu would probably like devise a method
Mac D.: "kill me, mu try again"
Narrator : yeah, but you risk my botching it worse
*mu
Space: he tapes a cardboard cutout of their face
Mac D.: does it get more and more difficult for him to reconstruct a body with e
very consecutive death
Narrator : yes
and bits of the soul get lost along the way
and he has to
improvise
Mac D.: ew
Space: he tries his best
Narrator : and all he has in a spiritual sense are archetypes
so he just
mashes bits of their archetype in, in places of the lost pieces of soul
Mac D.: what does that mean for the revived
Narrator : it means their actions become more irrationally linked to their arche
type
and not following it exactly becomes difficult
Mac D.: oh dear
mu's a bit of a cunt iint e
Narrator : no he's just unable to do anything else
i mean if he put your soul in and it's incomplete
Mac D.: "DO NOT WORRY CHILD, I WILL BE GENTLE"
Narrator : you'd be effectively lobotomized
Mac D.: [loud smashing and hammering noises]
i love how he just
Narrator : you try to revive a dead person
Mac D.: takes them out of death, without their consent.
and violently smashes them into a new body
Narrator : it's not his job to get consent, it's his job to open the third heave
n
that's not the mask of a man who asks
he just
j-j-j-jams it in
Steph: i'm hiding
Forrest: oh god gabby you have arms for eyes
oh god jaime you have FEET FOR HANDS AND SEVENTEEN NOSES
OH GOD STEPH YOU HAVE A P-oh wait
Steph: rude and offensive
Forrest: yeah see how fuckin like being brought back in a shit body
Steph: better than dying
come on
hide in my 'no mu allowed' fort
Forrest: why we watching this guy masturbate
Steph: it gives us answers
to the truth
Forrest: i don't see truth here
Steph: sometimes
the truth is not always evident
Narrator : what
who is masturbating
Forrest: you are

Space: mu
no
Narrator : is shadow penis
Space: the narrator
vincent price
Narrator : no
Space: i just like the mental image
of steph and forrest like hiding in a box fort
that says "NO MU ALLOWED"
Forrest: we ain't lettin you bring us back from the dead
Steph: i am
i'm horrified of death
Forrest: get OUT OF THE FORT
Narrator : http://en.inkei.net/Mu
why
does that site
even exist
i mean i love it
but why
Mac D.: science is all about finding answers
Steph: the fantastic kitty
Forrest: why did you invite me to stare at mr mu's penis
Steph: re
se
ar
ch
Mac D.: time for MEEEEEEEEEEEEEe
to go to BEEEEEEED
because it's 5:30 IN THE MOOOOOOOOORNING
Steph: chump
Space: i knew you were here
eldritch s. (GM): rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Mind
{(
12
+
20
+
14
)}+3
= 17
Space: why did you roll mind just then
eldritch s. (GM): for moneypenny in the fg
Space: oh my gosh
health
Space: one who falls to ruin
Space: i like how third heaven sort of has developed its own aestheticc
eldritch s. (GM): what is that
Space: just like
all of these tokens
look hird heaven-y
that's the only way to explain it
eldritch s. (GM): the board of health
four
gray haired
white men
Space: old men sitting in a dark room and running the show
eldritch s. (GM): they're seele
there are 6 members of the board

6, in christian numerology, typically signifies imperfection
Space: i don't trust them
except for aybe larry
eldritch s. (GM): sideburns
Steph: he looks like a gonzo journalist
eldritch s. (GM): look at fucking tom
Steph: he looks
fucking
absolutely
evil
eldritch s. (GM): look at his fucking eyes
Tom Jones: No, there will be no adjustments to the budget.
That money is well-spent in the executive pension fund...
Space: that's pretty shifty right there
Tom Jones: Yes, yes!
Give into your hatred...
Space: "i AM the board of health"
Tom Jones: Stephanie Karloman...
You will witness the full power of the Dark Side of the Archetypes!
Steph: no... ill never join you
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6XJjMwMFF5g
Tom Jones: this is the board of health's theme
just absurdly evil
Steph: do you
Tom Jones: for a petty
Steph: wnat it on soundcloud
Tom Jones: organization
i have it
Steph: oh good
Tom Jones: it's on
Steph: this is
beautiful
Space: this plays
whenever they're talking about the budget
Larry Shotterman: Tom, what the fuck are you doing with the hood on.
Tom Jones: It is necessary... to influence the dark forces of the Ministry of He
alth.
Harry Browning: I just want to go home.
Victor Sherrings: ... Me too.
Tom Jones: Silence.
Steph: so when do i get a lightsbaer
eldritch s. (GM): you don't
only those of the hero archetype get a lightsaber
Steph: a related question
when will we unlock the 4rd trait
*3rd
eldritch s. (GM): that will happen when i judge it right
probably when you fight the first boss
well technically
the second boss
Steph: his name is Phil
Steph: Phil the Nihilist
eldritch s. (GM): i notice
i have a few repeating names
harry
there's harry browning
and then harry
Steph: yes
eldritch s. (GM): so we have

ruddman as the chairman
on this evil board of health
Steph: i am a board member
eldritch s. (GM): look at these men
Steph: old rich white men
eldritch s. (GM): who is the most evil one on the board
Steph: tom jones seems like petty evil
i'd have to say hall
eldritch s. (GM): steph offens the board
they all stand up
they are the final boss
rolling 1d20
(
7
)
= 7
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
= 1
Space: they don't even have superpowers
eldritch s. (GM): rolling 1d20
(
3
)
= 3
Space: they're just
eldritch s. (GM): rolling 1d20
(
18
)
= 18
rolling 1d20
(
20
)
= 20
Space: a bunch of old men
Steph: rolling 1d20
(
17
)
= 17
eldritch s. (GM): rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
7
+
1
+
7
)}+1
= 8
John Ruddman fails to punch a teenage girl
Harry Browning: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
14
+
20
+
19
)}+1
= 20
Steph: oh dear jesus
Harry Browning uppercuts her
Harry Browning: rolling 2d8 + 1
(
8
+
3
)+1
= 12
Steph: K-kh...
Steph moves to kick Harry in the dick
Steph: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + for Brawn
{(
2
+
10
+
1
)}
= 2
Harry Browning protects his groin
Larry Shotterman: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 2 for Brawn
{(
13
+
17
+
15
)}+2
= 17
Larry Shotterman leaps in and boxes Steph's ears
Larry Shotterman: rolling 1d8 + 2
(
3
)+2
= 5
{(
18
+
3
+
20
)}+2
= 20
Space: jesus christ these old men
Tom Jones shoots Steph with his stungun
Space: power
unlimited
power
Tom Jones: POWER!

UUUUUUUUUUUUUNLIIIIIIIIIIIIIIMITED
POWERRRRRRRRRRRRR!!
rolling 1d8 + 2
(
4
)+2
= 6
Steph: Ow!
Tom Jones: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Finesse
{(
17
+
9
+
6
)}+1
= 10
Dr. Hall is about to shoot Steph but drops his gun
Dr. Hall: Damn!
Victor Sherrings: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
11
+
5
+
10
)}+1
= 11
Victor Sherrings whacks Steph with his briefcase
Victor Sherrings: rolling 1d8 + 1
(
4
)+1
= 5
Forrest: Ahem.
Steph: ...!
Tom Jones: A boy cannot stop the full power of the Board of Health...
Forrest: He can with video evidence of the board physically assaulting a teenage
girl.
Forrest holds up his camera
Steph: F-Forrest! That's... that's brilliant!
Tom Jones: Then you shall die...
And there will be no evidence.
Forrest: Steph, keep protecting me with your face while I upload this to the int
ernet.
Steph: Wh...? Uh, okay!
Forrest begins ELITE PORTABLE HACKING
John Ruddman: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
6
+
14
+
10
)}+1
= 11
John Ruddman punches Forrest in the stomach
John Ruddman: I can't go to prison!
Forrest: HoofJohn Ruddman: rolling 1d8 + 1
(
8
)+1
= 9
{(
7
+
13
+
5
)}+1
= 8
Harry Browning goes to punch Forrest, but slips on the floor
Harry Browning: No...
Steph: He's down... now's my chance!
Steph moves to punch Victor in the throat
{(
12
+
19
+
10
)}
= 12
Victor Sherrings: Ough
rolling 1d8 + 1
(
6
)+1
= 7
Victor Sherrings staggers back
Larry Shotterman: You're gonna be feeling this, kid. Learned it in KKorea.
*Korea
{(
3
+
1
+
4
)}+2
= 5
Larry Shotterman hurts his back trying to do some insane move
Steph: I bet you learned... uh, being old! In Korea too!
Tom Jones: The boy!
Kill the boy!
Tom Jones tries shocking Forrest with his stungun
Tom Jones: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 2 for Finesse

{(
5
+
5
+
19
)}+2
= 7
Space: forrest turned it all around
Tom Jones shocks John instead
Tom Jones: You fool!
{(
16
+
15
+
3
)}+1
= 16
Dr. Hall pics up his gun
Space: someone is gonna die
Dr. Hall shoots Forrest
Dr. Hall: rolling 1d4
(
2
)
= 2
Forrest: Ghhh.....
Dr. Hall: rolling 2d8 + 3
(
6
+
3
)+3
= 12
Steph: Forrest!
Victor Sherrings is busy gasping for air
Forrest ups his upload game in the face of impending death
Victor Sherrings: roll mind
increased
(
16
+
5
+
14
)+1
= 36
Forrest achieves DOUBLE HACK
Forrest: http://cdn.gifbay.com/2014/03/the_worlds_first_double_hack-119451.gif
Narrator : If you can survive one more turn.
You will have uploaded the video.

{(
4
+
5
+
13
)}+1
= 6
John Ruddman swings wildly, and misses
John Ruddman: God damn you!
{(
7
+
5
+
8
)}+1
= 8
Harry Browning is having trouble getting off the floor
Steph rushes over to try and shoulder-check Hall's gun arm
{(
18
+
8
+
13
)}+1
= 14
Dr. Hall 's gun goes flying
...!!!!
Steph: Haha!
Larry Shotterman: Suck on this, shitkid!
{(
11
+
7
+
2
)}+2
= 9
Larry Shotterman hits his side on the board table, and winces in pain
Tom Jones: THE BOY!!!
{(
11
+
3
+
11
)}+2
= 13
Tom Jones begins shocking the shit out of Forrest
Tom Jones: rolling 1d8 + 2
(
6
)+2
= 8
Forrest: Hrrrrrrrrrrrgh
Dr. Hall: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
12
+
7
+
5
)}+1
= 8
Dr. Hall tries to charge Forrest, but falls as Steph trips him
Victor Sherrings: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 1 for Brawn
{(
14
+
14
+
15
)}+1
= 15
Steph: Oh, whoops! Careful, Mr. Hall!
Victor Sherrings raises his hand
Victor Sherrings: Goodbye.
Victor Sherrings explodes
Space: he was a robot
this whole time
Narrator : Demons are summoned.
Steph: Oh... oh no! There's only one thing that can save us now!
Narrator : Forrest.
You MUST upload the video!
Forrest: ....Aaaaand done.
Narrator : roll mind, one more time
Forrest hits that Enter Key
(
13
+
6
+
14
)+1
= 34
Narrator : Yes, he hits enter, not backspace.
Steph: ..................Uh.
Forrest: Alright, there we go. Corruption in the system exposed.
Steph: Forrest.
One Who Brings Darkness: ...
Forrest: I'm going to a hospital before I bleed out
Steph: Forrest.
Forrest looks at THE DARKNESS-BRINGER
One Who Brings Darkness: I WILL KILL YOU.
Forrest: ..........You got bus fare I could borrow?
Steph: FORREST
Forrest: What, too presumptuous?
One Who Brings Darkness: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Brawn
{(
17
+
10
+
6
)}+3
= 13
One Who Brings Darkness slams a hand down on him
One Who Brings Darkness: rolling 3d8 + 3
(
3
+
8
+
1
)+3
= 15
Forrest: Ah-.....Yyyyup, there it goes.
Bluhhhh
Steph: ..........
One Who Devours : HUNGRY HUNGRY EAT EAT KILL EAT HUNGER FLESH MORE BLOOD
{(
11
+
3
+
5
)}+3
= 8
One Who Devours tries snatching Steph, but Steph avoids
One Who Falls to Ruin: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Brawn
{(
3
+
2
+
1
)}+3
= 5
One Who Falls to Ruin just snarls at Steph
Mac D.: waitaminute
blood-starved beast
One Who Falls to Ruin: yes
Steph: ...!!!!
John Ruddman: ...
John Ruddman tries running

{(
20
+
14
+
19
)}+1
= 20
Space: whoosh
John Ruddman oom
John Ruddman: *zoom
One Who Corrupts All: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Brawn
{(
2
+
7
+
17
)}+3
= 10
One Who Corrupts All is amorphous and just gurgles
Harry Browning: ...
I'm going to die here.
Steph: I'm not!!
Forrest: {Steph....Steeeeph....}
Steph: Um-- Forrest, take care of yourself!
Steph just tries bolting the fuck out of there
{(
14
+
4
+
10
)}+1
= 11
Forrest: {I'm a ghost, you dolt.}
Steph: Oh...
Narrator : Steph bolts, leaving the demons to destroy the world
Steph: I made it!
Forrest: {Should have used The Force.}
Steph: But I don't have a lightsaber...
Narrator : these are their like relative
sizes
Forrest: {You don't need a lightsaber to use the Force you dolt.}
Space: laments is a midget
Narrator : yes
Forrest: {Have you only watched the prequel trilogy or something.}
Narrator : he's also really weak
Steph: W-Maybe!
Narrator : you could probably punch him and he would die
Forrest: {Oh, that's pathetic.}
Steph: I'm busy running from demons!
Forrest: {The world is going to end, and you haven't seen the original trilogy.
What a way to go/}
Narrator : these are really scary boss nihilists

Space: even laments
Narrator : yes
not all boss nihilists are these guys
but all of these guys are bosses
Space: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yca2BCwAnBQ
Mac D.: i wonder what the One Who Corrupts' gimmick is
Steph: angry mainyu
Narrator : can you guess these guy's sgimmicks
each one corresponds
to an area
in the second heaven
Mac D.: ohhhhh NNNOOOOO
Steph: i already guessed them
way back when
Narrator : can you guess, duff
Mac D.: are they each going to have a unique way to fight them
Narrator : maybe, i've only really worked out the concrte details on one fight
Mac D.: it'd be cool if that were the case
okay so the One Who Devours eats a lot
the One Who Falls To Ruin makes things Decay
the One Who Brings Darkness preys on peoples' fears
and the One Who Corrupts All turns people bad
Narrator : what about laents
*laments
Mac D.: he makes people sad and want to kill themselves
seer i have a third heaven lore question
One Who Laments : sure
You friends will abandon you...
Mac D.: can ghosts be a thing in this cosmology
One Who Laments : i guess
Mac D.: hmmmmm
One Who Laments : i haven't payed it much thought
Mac D.: i'll need to converse this subject with you at a later date
Steph: suspicious
One Who Laments : This world is meaningless...
And you shall die...
Steph: No...
Mac D.: ya i know that
Steph: No, YOU shall die!
Steph shocks him with Tom Jones's stun gun
{(
1
+
9
+
12
)}+1
= 10
One Who Laments weakly snatches it from her
Mac D.: garl vinland no.....
Steph: Wh- hey!
Forrest: Damn, I can't believe he took that from you.
One Who Laments : I am the judge.
Forrest: You seriously need to work out more.
Steph: C'mon, give it back!
Steph tries snatching it back

{(
19
+
19
+
3
)}+1
= 20
One Who Laments : And your life, it wOne Who Laments has his arm ripped off along with the stungun, it gave really ea
sily
Forrest: Wow, poor thing.
Nice going, Steph.
Steph: Ew... uh, Forrest, you shoot him.
One Who Laments : My physical form matters not, this entire fortress bows to my
will!
Steph tosses the stungun with arm attached to Forrest
Forrest: .....
Forrest shoots Laments with his magnifying glass laser
One Who Laments : roll
(
3
+
2
+
7
)
= 12
One Who Laments slithers out of the way, slowly
Forrest: Damn.
Steph: Nice going.
Forrest: He very slowly avoided my attack.
One Who Laments : Torment... Toooorment....
Forrest: Okay, you're turn again.
Steph: Maybe you should work out more.
Steph goes to whack it with her notebook
{(
14
+
19
+
3
)}+1
= 15
One Who Laments is struck and immediately collapses into a heap of gore
Forrest: Congratulations.
You killed the tiny sad gross thing.
One Who Falls to Ruin snarls
Steph: Yeah, no thanks to you. Does this mean I--
Oh.
Forrest: ...Oh, good.
....Is that his back flesh? Jesus Christ.
Steph: ...Your turn?
One Who Falls to Ruin: rolling {3d20dl1}dh1 + 3 for Brawn
{(
16
+
2
+
17
)}+3
= 19
One Who Falls to Ruin slashes them
Forrest: Nope, looks like I'm dead again.
One Who Falls to Ruin: rolling 1d8 + 3
(
3
)+3
= 6
cant kill a ghost
Forrest: ....Oh, shit, that's right.
Too bad for you, Steph.
Steph: Heh...
Finally, I get to use this! Forrest, look!
Steph points at her character sheet
Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks at this
Steph: You automatically stabilize.
When your life is less than or equal to your toughness, you regenerate 1, have +
5 block, and increase all rolls to escape.
Forrest: What is it.
Steph: It's my first trait... that I never got to use!
Forrest: Oh, wow. An ability for running away like a coward.
One Who Falls to Ruin: oops
i accidentally
remvoe the trait
trying to copypaste it
Forrest: Oh.
One Who Falls to Ruin: because there's no undo button in roll20
Steph: i got it
Forrest: Guess you don't have it any more.
Steph: dont worry
One Who Falls to Ruin: you just have to fuck yourself
Forrest: Too bad for you, I guess.
Forrest looks back at the Ruinmaker
One Who Falls to Ruin: ...
Forrest: Alright, listen, obviously you have a lot of pent-up frustration.
Steph: Check out my cool five block, Mr. Ruin!
Forrest: ....Given that you ripped out your own back and wear it like a cloak.
Steph throws the One Who Laments's gore corpse at him
One Who Falls to Ruin stands on his hind leg
One Who Falls to Ruin: Legs
{(
20
+
4
+
20
)}
= 20
One Who Falls to Ruin is thwacked right in the face with them ushy corpse
Steph: Nailed him!
Forrest: ...Oh, wow. Nice shot.
One Who Falls to Ruin: rolling {3d20kh1} + 3 for increased brawn
{(
11
+
1
+
6
)}+3
= 14
One Who Falls to Ruin howls and goes to stomp her
Steph: Oh.
Steph tries to roll out of the way
{(
7
+
8
+
18
)}+1
= 9
One Who Falls to Ruin: CRUSHED LIKE AN ANT!
Forrest: Hope that five block does you well.
(
2
)+3
= 5
Steph: ...Oh, hey!
One Who Falls to Ruin: it does
Forrest: Huh. Imagine that.
One Who Falls to Ruin has his foot held back
Steph: This is the true power of my archetype...
Forrest: Being a coward.
Steph: Quick, punch its dick!
Forrest: I'm a ghost, I can't physically touch things.
One Who Falls to Ruin: ... THEN I SHALL HAVE IT FOR MYSELF.
Steph: Okay, then possess it or some-- wait what?
Forrest: Oh, hey, there's an idea.
One Who Falls to Ruin: rolling {3d20kh1} + 3 for increased brawn
{(
2
+
15
+
18
)}+3
= 21
One Who Falls to Ruin fucking goes to eat her
Steph: ...!!!!!
Forrest: .....Oh.
(
1
+
3
+
4
)+3
= 11
zerp hp
Steph: Oh.
One Who Falls to Ruin absorbs the power of her Archetype
Steph: ....Oh.
Forrest: Oh good, now he's a coward.
Steph: Well, now we're both dead.
One Who Falls to Ruin: steph you're a ghost
Steph: Do you have Mr. Mu's phone number?
Forrest: Nah, we're both ghosts.
No.
I like being a ghost, anyway.
Steph: God dammit.
One Who Falls to Ruin: I SHALL BURN THIS MISERABLE WRECK TO ASHES.
Steph: Uh... hey, One Who Devours, do you have it?
One Who Devours : NO
Forrest looks up at Ruinmaker
Forrest: ....Why?
Steph: Okay, thanks... uh, what about you, Dr. Hall?
Dr. Hall: eat shit
Forrest: Why do you want to burn it to ash.
Steph: Jeez... okay, I'll just have to find him myself.
Steph starts searching the character rows for Mr. Mu
{(
12
+
10
+
13
)}
= 12
Forrest: Steph wait, he fucked off.
Steph: Oh, damn.
Do we win?
Forrest: I'd say that's a win.
Steph: ...Oh! There you are.
Forrest: Except we're both ghosts now.
Mr. Mu: Shit bitch, you fine.
Steph: ;) ;) ;)
Bring me back to life so I can beat up monsters some more.
Leave Forrest as a ghost, he's less annoying that way.
Forrest: Excuse me.

Steph: Sorry, he's the same level of annoying. I just don't mind him as much.
Mr. Mu: rolling 1d4
(
1
)
= 1
rolling 1d4
(
4
)
= 4
i don't believe it
steph, had this been real
would have permanently gained a poin in spirit
rolling 1d4
(
2
)
= 2
Mr. Mu: rolling 1d4
(
3
)
= 3
Steph: c:
Mr. Mu: and forrest would have broken even
Steph: do you have a table set up for results
Mr. Mu: yeah
Steph: fuck yes
Mr. Mu: it's a really simple table
and it doesn't account for aesthetic differences
Steph: what determines those
Mr. Mu: up to the player
Space cackles evilly
Mac D.: forrest comes back inhumanly GORGEOUS
and hates every minute of it
Space: he's as anime as his family
Mac D.: just
shoop his face
onto an anime boy body
Mr. Mu: it's good to be able to test the reviving system
rolling 1d4
(
2
)
= 2
rolling 1d4
(
3
)
= 3
man these are lucky rolls
you're only broken even and gain so far
rolling 1d4
(
2
)
= 2
Mr. Mu: rolling 1d4

(
4
)
= 4
amazing rolls
Space: what's the
Mr. Mu: that's a gain in mind
Space: absolute worst roll
Mr. Mu: well you lose a point permanently in a stat
Mac D.: does the first roll determine gain/loss and the second roll determine wh
ich stat
Mr. Mu: other way around
Mac D.: ahh ok
Mr. Mu: remember when gab almost died
how stressed out everyone got
Space: i was cackling
Mac D.: if gab dies it's going to be by her own hand
exploding in a blast of white-hote anger
a Frick that shakes the world to its core
Mr. Mu: so, duff
Space: hey duff
Mr. Mu: you now can see all the npcs in the game
Mac D.: let's see here
Space: http://i.imgur.com/DUso9mS.jpg
Mac D.: who's THIS lady
Space: that's Mlle. Lane
Mac D.: HA HAAA PERFECT
Space: gah that's really jpegy and gross hold on
Mlle. Lane: you haven't met her yet
Mac D.: we still need to have a conversation with The Hipster
Space: http://i.imgur.com/Dns9fAU.jpg maybe this image is just jpegy by default
the npc
that i want to mee tthe most is
???
becasue look
a man of mystery
Mac D.: forrest interacts with his grieving family by possessing Sooz
Space: speaking of grieving families
look who's next to loren
Mac D.: on the hunt for vengeance
just gonnaaaaa SLIP into adeva while we wait
Mlle. Lane: no
pls
stay here for a while
Space: its ok seer
in mere
*im here
Mlle. Lane: but yes
it's lucille
the mother of naomi
who is dead
(because of steph)
Steph: :c
Mlle. Lane: but everyone think she's missing
Mac D.: oh i wasn't leaving
i'm just having adeva up in another tab
Mlle. Lane: yeah but she has a bio and such alrady
she came up pretty fully formed
Steph: all thanks to me
Mac D.: forrest still needs to discover that he can make a magnifying glass that
shoots laser
Steph: of all these
npcs
who do you think is secretly behind it
Mac D.: sooz, obviously
Steph: Li'l Soozie
Space: i'm still proud of that
horrible name
Mac D.: she did it to make Big Bro happy
Space: did it work
Forrest: idunno i guess i'm having fun so far
Steph: you're a ghost
Forrest: it's not so bad
check this out
Forrest possesses Steph
Steph grumpy face
Forrest pops out
Forrest: see, fun
Steph: i don't ever want to do that again
Forrest possesses her again
Forrest: "bah buh look at me I'M steph i laugh at people breaking their nose"
Forrest pops out
Steph: That's not funny!
Forrest: actually hang on
Forrest possesses again
Forrest rummages through her pockets
Forrest: Where're those twelve dollars....
Steph: I'm gonna call the cops...
Forrest: you hush you're possessed
Forrest pops back out
Forrest: i can't believe you have NO pocket money
Steph gets out her cell phone
Steph: Hello? Police? There's a ghost possesing me!
Mac D.: we start the game up again and they're still sitting at the library wait
ing for the rain to stop
Steph: theyve been sitting there for weeks
Forrest: this is getting a little ridiculous
Steph: it just rains a lot here
it's the pacific northwest
Forrest: how do you people live
Mac D.: also please tell me gabby's guardians are eustice and muriel
eldritch s. (GM): let me ask
soace said he was proud of that terrible name
explain
Mac D.: was Lel Shitkid his idea
in terms of naming
Mac D.: oh idunno then
Space: i came up with all three of their names you chump
Iblis: I'll kill you shitty kids.
Steph: no fuck you

Iblis: friend ship
my weakness
urgh
Mr. Mu: social rinku, go
One Who Brings Darkness: Nihilism goes here...
Steph: i've gotta stay fly
Normal Finesse Test
Rolling 3d20 Finesse for
"11 "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Normal Finesse Test
" "
Lower Margin: 11
Upper Margin: 11
Result:
Normal Spirit Test
Rolling 3d20 Spirit for
"beating up iblis "
Lower Margin: 11
Upper Margin: 11
Result:
Increased Brawn Test
Rolling 3d20 Brawn for
" "
Lower Margin: 11
Upper Margin: 10
Result:
rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1}
{{(
8
+
5
+
3
)}}
= 5
Steph: {{3d20dl1}dh1}
{{(
9
+
4
+
15
)}}
= 9
Gordon Knotts: Steph... I'm such a better writer than you.. fuck off...
Narrator : GIant naked Mr. Mu falls apart into the sea of LCL.
Mac D.: fuck you doin
eldritch s. (GM): chilling in my own roll20
Mac D.: and you didn't
invite
me
eldritch s. (GM): nope
Mac D.: well TOOOOO bad motherfucker i'm HERE ANYWAY
i want to third heaven again
every day i am denied third heaven hurts me

Forrest: this is.....God?
Lel Shitkid: die now
Forrest: no
sexy beam
Mac D.: wanna dakkenlaud
Lel Shitkid: spaces really wants to cypress
Mac D.: but we did cypress last time...
Lel Shitkid: talk to him
coward
Mac D.: fool i DID talk to him
Lel Shitkid: what did he say
Mac D.: he's being......difficult.........
"we didn't FINISH the cypress sesh" he insists
Lel Shitkid: just let him have what he wants
Mac D.: but i really wanna do dakkenlaud....
Fawkes M.: It isn't July 21st, 16:35
eldritch s. (GM): 11th
Fawkes M.: 80 bucks says that date is significant to this plot
eldritch s. (GM): i marked the date of the srebenica massacre so i can mock von
about it on the anniversary
Fawkes M.: Down to the minute
Bootiful
Mobile L: https://45.media.tumblr.com/8ab95978cfa7cdf403ee92f4d043db74/tumblr_ns
c9qyiSvz1r470w9o1_250.gif
Fawkes M.: Nyan
Mobile L: "Penis!!"
Fawkes M.: J-j-j-jamdat369 it in
This seems like the theme of a Team Rocket analogue
Mac D.: AAAAAT LLLLAAAAAAAAAAAAST
Mobile L: it's time, buddy...
Space: i can hardly believe it
we're home
Fawkes M.: Yeah
Damn shame we lost Hollow Night along the way
eldritch s. (GM): YEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEA
Mobile L: Its time will come again
but now, frickers
now it is frickin' happening
eldritch s. (GM): YEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEAYEA
Gabby: f r i c k
Jaime: who the fuck is ronald
Steph: my grandfather
eldritch s. (GM): what the FUCK is a canada
Jaime: GOOD FuCKIN QuesTOION
GHT
eldritch s. (GM): why is jaime there
he should move
he lives here now
with the trash
and vietnemes
Space: it is the scuttlebug's home
Steph quietly waits for the rain to stop
Mobile L: So refresh my mem'ry, what is happen?
Jaime: I think I missed a sesh
Fawkes M.: Last I recall
eldritch s. (GM): he did, i think
Fawkes M.: There was a class going down
eldritch s. (GM): yeah basically the schoolday advanced as per normal
steph and forrest wandered off to have anal sex or what have you
and jaime and gab were sitting around sniffing glue or whatever gets them their
jollies
Jaime: so where the frick is gabby
oh
eldritch s. (GM): with him, at the school
Gabby: hi, fricker
Jaime: hi
Forrest is also playing the rain waiting game
Steph: ...Umbrellas are pretty great.
Narrator : good luck with that, fatass
Forrest: .........
Narrator : The rain has picked up since they got out of school.
It's a practical deluge.
Steph: ...I don't think it's gonna get any better any time soon.
Gabby is RATHER GRUMPY at this prospect'
Narrator : oh yeah jaime missed some personal drama with lachance
Forrest: ....So now, what.
Narrator : that's about it
Gabby: ...Friiiick.
Steph: Should we just head out?
Jaime: recap moi on the NATURE of the DRAMA
Narrator : she and foxhole exchanged some words
Forrest: In this?
Narrator : she was upset
thereatened to beat forrest
he made nice with forrest and left
Jaime: I... don't think I brought an umbrella.
Mobile L: Eldy is it supposed to be on the outside school map, 'cuz we in town
Fawkes M.: Jeezus
Steph: I mean, I don't care. We can run to the... the fuckin' umbrella store or
something.
Narrator : this is the town map
Forrest: The umbrella store.
Jaime: Or a raincoat, or anything like that.
Narrator : i represent situations like this with the school people being
lower left corner
and steph and fatfuck
Steph: Yeah, they sell umbrellas there.
Narrator : are off in town
Fawkes M.: Just draw this like one of your French FGs
Forrest: Oh, I thought they sold ponchos
Steph: Maybe they do. We won't know until we go there.
Mobile L: ...Me either. What's with all this fricking rain lately?
Forrest: Where is this fabled "Umbrella Store."
Gabby: FRICKLE
Steph: We could look around.
Jaime: I don't know. Don't think it has anything to do with recent events.
Gabby: I wish it'd frick off.
Could use some dang sunlight.
Jaime: ...How desperate are you to get home?
Gabby: ...Uhhh... I'd say, like, 67.8% desperate.
Forrest: I am not stepping out into a monsoon to look around for an undetermined
location.
Gabby: Why d'you ask?
Roland Glass approaches the school, a dead-eyed, greasy haired, soaking wet man
in a suit
Jaime: I've got a plan. There's bound to be a lost-and-found, right?

Steph: Okay, I'll just look it up on my phone. Because I guess we have to do thi
ngs the boring way.
Gabby: ...Yea
Steph goes to look up "places that sell umbrellas near me"
Gabby uhhhh RAPIST????
Roland Glass has a deep frown on his face
Forrest: Good. Boring keeps me dry.
Gabby: ...Hi...?
Jaime: ...Bad weather?
Jaime to the INCOMING RAPIST
(
17
)
= 17
Lot'sa spaghett- Umbrella shops'a here!
Fawkes M.: GAY LUIGI
Gabby: book
Steph: Yeah, look, we're right near one.
Roland Glass: ... Hello.
This is...
Roland Glass sigh
Forrest: Oh, good.
Roland Glass: Belmont Private High School, yes?
Forrest: What a stroke of good fortune.
Gabby: ...Yep. Uh, whatcha need?
Jaime: ...Yes, it is.
Roland Glass: I see.
Forrest: I hope you have money, considering I spent the twelve dollars I had buy
ing you food.
Roland Glass: I am Roland Glass, I've been sent to do some routine checks on the
school.
You know, make sure the money isn't being spent on crack-cocaine.
Jaime: Oh, by... the board?
Steph: Okay, we're probably gonna have to stop off at my house then.
Roland Glass: Yes.
We've gotten some interesting reports.
Forrest: How far away is that.
Gabby: ...Oh. Crap day to have to do that, right?
Steph: It's a nice stroll.
Jaime: Crack-cocaine reports?
Roland Glass: I'll be doing it every day this week.
Might as well be.
Today I'm going to be looking into the...
Forrest: Don't you have any umbrellas at your house anyway.
Roland Glass checks his soaking clipboard
Roland Glass: ... Boilers.
Gabby: ...Huh. I'm gonna super hope for you that it quits raining the rest of th
e week.
Roland Glass: It won't.
Steph: That's farther away than the umbrella shop. Besides, one of them is my gr
andfather's.
Jaime: Yeah. What else do you need to check?
Gabby: Well... Hope is blind, and stuff.

Roland Glass: The staff's conduct, students' conduct, electricity, asbestos, etc
, etc.
Forrest: What's the point of stopping at your house, then.
Roland Glass: Oh, fire extinguishers, fire alarms, fire sprinklers.
You think they could fork over the money to have a professional do this, but no.
Steph: Well, fuck if you're using my granddad's umbrella. We're gonna have to bu
y you one.
Forrest: Okay, let me see if I have this right.
Jaime: ...What kind of reports came in, exactly?
Gabby: What, uhhh... What kinda profession is that, anyway? Are you like, some k
inda overly-versatile janitor?
Forrest: We're going to walk a fair distance in the pouring torrential rain to g
et money so I can purchase and umbrella.
Roland Glass: Things like books being burned, physical violence against students
, threats, a pig being cut open in the middle of class.
Forrest: And then walk the fair distance and more through the pouring torrential
rain again so I can get the umbrella.
Roland Glass: I mean, I by all rights shouldn't be doing this.
Forrest: And then go home.
Steph: Yup.
Roland Glass: But we got a budget cut and they made me do all of this.
Jaime: ...Mm.
Gabby: ...That really sucks. Sorry.
Forrest: Or I could just stay at the library until the rain lets up.
Roland Glass: Oh, oh, live chicken being kept in the school.
Jaime: Are there any, like, reports of mad cow disease?
Or- yeah, that's true.
Steph: You could.
Roland Glass: Oh, a case of "chicken psychosis".
Steph: But then you'd be stuck with me.
Roland Glass: And- wait, what?
Jaime: ...I feel really bad for that stud-Roland Glass: They kept a chicken in this school?
Jaime: ...?
Space: CHICKEN PSYCHOSIS
Forrest: You say that like it's a threat.
Jaime nods twice
Gabby now feels bad for the rapist
Roland Glass exhales
Roland Glass: Okay.
I'll be sure to check in on that.
Space: It's not a threat, Forrest. Why would you think that?
Steph: oh
Roland Glass: Oh, yeah, and the multiple break-ins.
Multiple assaults.
Missing persons.
You really think there would be some police around here.
Gabby winces a tiny bit at the uhhh... the memories
Gabby: ...Yeah...
Forrest: It isn't like your presence within a five foot radius of me is liable t
o give me a seizure or anything.
Jaime: ...
Forrest: Also, I stay dry.
Jaime: ...Are you talking about that man who attacked the school in the middle o
f the day?
Roland Glass: Yeah.

Steph: You have to weigh the pros and cons here, Forrest.
Forrest: So really, this seems like the most advantageous option.
Gabby: ...That was fricked up.
Roland Glass: And some nutjob who posed as a reporter and threw a book at the Pr
incipal's head.
Gabby: ...That was also fricked up.
Roland Glass: Oh, oh.
And the guy who broke out of a hospital.
Steph: Well, we might as well pull up a chair.
Roland Glass: And has been seen around here a few times.
Forrest: Or we could go inside.
Roland Glass: Grown man, with some goatee.
Jaime: ...Right.
Roland Glass: Hanging around kids.
Gabby: ...Uh... Huh...
Steph: Yes, a chair inside.
Roland Glass: Can't make this stuff up.
Steph: Which is where most chairs are.
Jaime: He sounds vaguely familiar.
Gabby: Weird times.
Roland Glass: Oh, oh, oh, and someone saw a snake.
A big snake.
Forrest: Yes.
Roland Glass: Like a python.
Gabby: ...Yeah, wow... Fricked crap.
Forrest gets up and goes inside the library
Steph follows the forest department
Roland Glass sighs
Roland Glass: Alright, well, you'll be seeing more of me, I guess.
And if the man with a goatee comes up to you, and offers you candy, don't take i
t.
Forrest goes and has a sit, pulling a random book off the shelf to pass the time
Jaime: Got it.
Jaime nods
Narrator : The library is a bit freaked out from the stabbing
Jaime: Good luck, and take care with those boilers.
Roland Glass nods
Jaime or was it "take care, and good luck with those boilers", the dyslexic thin
ks
Gabby: Yeah, uh, good luck. Get dry and warm and stuff.
Roland Glass heads by to the ~evil disused place where the second heaven is~
Steph goes to sit by him, pulling out her phone
Gabby:
...You know what I think happened?
Jaime: ...What?
Forrest dives headfirst into the READING RAINBOW
Narrator : reading about what exactly
Steph explores the realm of social media
Narrator : who does steph follow on social media

on the hit site
Space: the various School Friends/Acquaintances/Enemies
Gabby: I think that guy majored in something like history, or theatre arts, or g
ender studies.
Narrator : twzler
Mac D.: dunno he pulled out a random book
(
7
)
= 7
rolling 1d20
(
13
)
= 13
Jaime: I can see that. And then he ended up with... a rainy job on a rainy day.
...That sounded better in my head.
Gabby: Yeah... Nyeheh, it wasn't bad.
Narrator : Forrest is reading a sexual-education book for the parents of Autisti
c children.
Jaime: ...So, anyways.
Gabby: Word to the wise, Jaime. Profitable degrees only.
...But yeah, the lost and found?
Forrest wonders what possible situation the knowledge in this book calls for
Narrator : Steph sees that there's going to be a rally for the missing people in
two days.
Steph: ...Hey, Forrest.
Jaime: Yeah. I bet there's an umbrella there that somebody's lost for months.
Forrest: Mm.
Jaime: They won't miss it.
Steph: Look at this.
Steph shows him her phone
Narrator : http://www.jkp.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/800x800/9df78e
ab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/9/7/9781849055260.jpg
Mobile L: "The Birds and the Bees: No Theory of Mind Edition, by Dr. Lawrence Ga
ynor"
Forrest looks up from his book at the Fone
Gabby: ...Nyeheheheh! Shrewd, I like it. Let's go look.
Forrest: ...Ah. Interesting.
Gabby: Nobody gives a crap about umbrellas unless they're, like, antiques.
Steph: We should go.
Jaime: Yeah, and using an antiquated umbrella is just gonna ruin it.
Anyways - where's the lost and found?
Forrest: For what reason. To support the families?
Jaime: I wouldn't know, since I haven't lost anything yet.
Gabby: Uhhh... Dunno, I never lose things.
Steph: I think it'll help give us some perspective.
Narrator : the office
http://www.west-info.eu/how-to-manage-an-autistic-childs-sexual-instincts/
that's his book
Gabby: ...Oh! Well there.
Forrest: Into what.
Gabby: The office.
Duh. Nyeheheh.
Jaime: ...Right.
Let's head there.

Steph: You know. Why what we're doing is important.
Gabby schedules a time for masturbating and avoids watching films where the wome
n are passive
Narrator : is gabby autism
In the office, the lost and fond contains...
rolling 1d20
(
12
)
= 12
rolling 1d20
(
6
)
= 6
Jaime draws circles of acquaintances
Mobile L: If she has anything, it's like, very very mild 'spergers
Narrator : One umbrella.
Forrest: I already place a fair level of importance on what we're doing.
Jaime how big
(
14
)
= 14
Sizable.
Steph: So you're not gonna go?
Gabby: ...That should work, 'long as you do the holding.
Jaime: I can do that.
Gabby: Heck yes.
Jaime goes to take that umbreller
Forrest: I most likely won't. I don't do public gatherings, anyway.
Gabby now wonders why she ever felt disdainful anything towards Jaime
Jaime this is technically stealing, Gabs
Narrator : thievery
Jaime outlaw, bitch
Gabby doesn't give a FRICK, son
Narrator : Good thing Hawthorne is too busy petting Theodore to notice.
Gabby we deserve this crap after defending the world from demon things
Jaime yer days are numbered, you demon in poultry form
Jaime: Alright, so - which side of town do you live on, again?
Steph: Okay, that's fine.
(
17
)
= 17
Jaime and Gabby hear the sounds of a scuffle outside
Gabby: East si... ????
Jaime: ...
Gabby:
Gabby LISSEN
Forrest turns a page in his book
Roland Glass: Get off!
Steph goes back to her phone
Steph: What book did you get?
Jaime instinctively listens to the struggle and the rain, to see if it's still g
oin'
Roland Glass still goin
Gabby: ...Uhh... You think, um...?
Forrest: It appears to be a book about managing the sex drives of autistic child
ren.
Steph: Good read?
Jaime is this within the LOS of where they view from
Roland Glass: no, they would have to go outside to see
Forrest: Not really.
Gabby: ...I feel awful for that guy, let's go see what's up.
Jaime: Yeah. Hopefully, it's not another...
Gabby gits oat her BOOK just in case
Steph peers over to look at it
Jaime trails off before he can say "chicken"
Lunatic: DIE.
Gabby: ...Yeah... Probably isn't any big dFRICK
Lunatic is currently choking the living shit out of Glass
Gabby:
Forrest reed
Gabby oh no
Jaime: Whoa, whoa, whoa!
Gabby oh HECK no
Gabby OH HEEEECK FRICKIN' NO
Gabby NOT IN MY HOUSE
Steph: Why are you reading this?
Gabby: HEY FRICKER!
Forrest: Because I pulled it from the shelf.
Jaime runs up and tries to club the Lunatic on the head with an umbreller
Roland Glass: brawn
Gabby: REMEMBER ME, BEE-HATCH?!?
Jaime: gahhhhh 1.0
Normal Brawn Test
"11 "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Lunatic is hit over the head and lets go
Jaime: how the fuck does this even
Lunatic: ignore it
Lunatic looks at them
Gabby bristles, brandishes her book menacingly and tries to intimidate this fric
k who is harassing the rapist
Steph: Why not read something that's... y'know, fuckin' actually good?
Lunatic: roll spirit
Gabby:
Normal Spirit Test
"11 "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Lunatic snarls like a rabid animal and CLIMBS UP THE FUCKING WALL
Gabby: !!?!
Lunatic hops away on the rooftops
Jaime: What the-Forrest: Because this is the book I pulled from the shelf.
Gabby: ...Jesus holy frick.
Gabby goes to check on Roland
Steph: Why not... pull a different book?
Roland Glass stares at the sky
Jaime does to as well, opening the umbreller
Roland Glass: ... God.
What an awful place.
Forrest: Don't feel like it.
Forrest turns page
Gabby: ...Guy. You okay? How bad did he hurt you?
Steph: Do you want me to get you a different book?
Roland Glass: I walked into the boiler room.
And this man is flat on the floor.
Forrest: No, I don't like leaving books unfinished, either.
Roland Glass: And then he gets up, after his neck just...
Snaps around like a slinky.
Gabby:
Roland Glass: And he started kicking the shit out of me.
Steph: Well... have fun.
Jaime: ...
Forrest: Mm.
Steph goes back to checking out her phone's social netowrking
Forrest turrrrns page
Gabby: ...Shhhhhhoot. Can you walk?
Roland Glass: Sure.
The boiler seemed fine.
Roland Glass stands up
Jaime: This isn't a great first impression, is it?

Gabby: ...I would love to tell you that's the weirdest crap, but...
Gabby sighs deeply
Sherwood Cotter is looking at Forrest, his face scrunched up
Forrest: ......
Roland Glass: Sure was.
Forrest glances at Sherwood
Roland Glass straightens his tie
Sherwood Cotter: ...
Forrest: .....Is there a problem.
Gabby:
Gabby tries to remember how much money she has
Jaime: ...You said this was for the whole week?
Sherwood Cotter: I would like you to know, my boy, that I, Sherwood Cotter, resp
ect the needs of the mentally challenged AND teenage parents out there.
Steph: ...?
Sherwood Cotter: And know that I, and the Conservative Party, are behind you.
Steph looks over
Forrest: ..........Okay. Good for you.
Sherwood Cotter thumbs up, sparkly grin
Mobile L: oh my god, cotter
Forrest turns his eyes back to his book
Steph: (...Oh.)
Roland Glass: ... I did, didn't I.
Steph: (He's a politician.)
Forrest: Mm.
Roland Glass: he's a politican you pissed off steph
Gabby does she at least have enough money for, like a hot chocolate
Roland Glass: and also one who was assaulted by teddy
rolling 1d20
(
8
)
= 8
no
Gabby fffffrghhhh...
Forrest eventually finishes the book, closing it and setting it down
Gabby:
Roland Glass: the lancaster does
Steph tries to behave in an incognito fashion, so he doesn't notice her
Roland Glass: he always pays his debts
Jaime: ...Well, hopefully, the worst has passed.
Mac D.: forrest now gets increased rolls towards preventing autistic girls from
publicly masturbating
Roland Glass: yes
Gabby just goes and grabs up all the change she has from her bookbag
Jaime: frick
Mobile L: Not like he wasn't great at that already ;D

Roland Glass: I hope.
Mobile L: ...Hey, uh.
Forrest looks at Steph being incognito
Forrest: ......
Gabby: ponos
Steph chill n' cool
Gabby holds out a pitiful handful of change
Forrest: .....
Roland Glass looks down at it
Jaime also looks down at the change
Jaime: ...?
Forrest quietly gets up and goes to get a random book, no longer obstructing Cot
ter's view from Steph
Gabby: ...This is like, not a bunch, but, uhhh... If you wanna get yourself a ho
t chocolate or something, maybe it'd cover, like, three-fourths. I dunno.
Steph: ...
........
Sherwood Cotter looks at her
Sherwood Cotter smiling, hands clapsed
Sherwood Cotter: Ah, my dear girl!
Steph: Hi there.
Sherwood Cotter: I remember you!
Steph oh dear god
Sherwood Cotter: You are my adoring fan! Yes, yes.
Steph: Um...
Jaime looks to Gabby
Roland Glass takes it
Forrest walks back over with his new random book, noticing the two at conversati
on
Forrest: .......
Roland Glass looks at the money
Roland Glass nods
Roland Glass: Thank you.
Jaime isn't being clued in, Gabby
Sherwood Cotter: Yes, yes, the girl who complimented me the other day, on the st
reet.
Gabby no, you don't have to chip in, this is MY frickin' charity act, ya dingus
Sherwood Cotter: You.
Gabby nods back, srs-faced as ever
Forrest excuses himself to another seat to let the two of them have their chat i
n peace
Gabby: Sure. You've earned it. That guy is a fricker and I'm sorry you had to de
al with him.
Steph: Are you, uh... here to get some votes?
Forrest cracks open that random book ready to once again drink from the fountain
of knowledge
Gabby just looks so srs, Jaime, like she's an adult lady doing adult things
Gabby but aaaaa, she's soooooo tiiiiny
Jaime: ...We aren't gonna need to call the police, right? If this is going on th
e report.
Gabby: ...Wouldn't be any good. Dude's already fricked off.
Jaime: Yeah. Police probably know about him already.
Roland Glass: He's on the watchlist, yes.
Gabby but forrest, is the random book... THE FOUNTAINHEAD...? by ayn rand
Roland Glass: I should probably bring this to the police, though. It's just righ
t.
rolling 1d20
(
3
)
= 3
Gabby: ...Right, yeah.
Narrator : The random book is...
The sequel, What's Happening to Tom?
The book for managing the sexual urges of autistic MALES.
Jaime: ...
Jaime not moving with that umbreller
Gabby fills her fap scrapbook with pictures of chopin and manga baras
Narrator : http://krainaksiazek.pl/9781849055239_whats_happening_to_tom_a_book_a
bout_puberty_for_boys_and_young_men_with_autism_and_related_conditions.jpg
Forrest: .......
Forrest is internally surprised the odds of THAT
Roland Glass pulls out his cell and calls the cops
Forrest begins his READ
Sherwood Cotter: What?
No, no, I simply enjoy fine reading.
In fact, right here, I have a copy of Machiavelli's own book, The Prince.
Forrest: .....
Sherwood Cotter shows it to her
Steph: You know, he wrote that one as, like, a satire.
Ms. Lao is dead inside
Maria West is a hispter
Forrest notices his proximity to Ms. Lao
Forrest: .......
Roland Glass hangs up
Roland Glass: They'll be here shortly.
Forrest glances at the young woman beside him briefly

Forrest: ...
Roland Glass: You two should probably get out of here.
Unless you want the police talking to you for ten hours.
Jaime: Alright.
Jaime nods
Gabby: ...'Kay, yes. Uh... Best of luck, again. Get a good hot chocolate with he
cka marshmallows.
...Wanna go to my place, Jaime?
Sherwood Cotter: Ah, I did!
He was a staunch supporter of liberty.
Though I believe there is wisdom to be found in the satire.
Steph: Yeah, a lot of people don't know that.
Jaime: ...Sure. I mean, we've got one umbrella.
Steph: Oh, that's, uh... that's great, guy.
Forrest: .......
Sherwood Cotter: What? What is wrong with the idea that when one cannot be both
feared and loved, one should be feared?
Forrest looks back at The Lao
Gabby: Maybe if we wait there long enough, the rain will quit.
Sherwood Cotter: Love does not stop the public from deposing you?
*.
Gabby is just in a hurry to evade the satanic death cops
Ms. Lao clearly does not want to be alive at this moment
Forrest: .......Ms. Lao.
Roland Glass: I have to stay here.
Steph: Well, that's... fuckin', uh, medieval times, not a modern-day democratic
process.
Roland Glass: I called the cops.
Jaime: That, and I don't want to fall behind, again.
...We should head out, then?
Roland Glass: You should.
Roland Glass pockets the money
Jaime nods
Jaime: Seeya. C'mon, Gabby.
Ms. Lao looks up
Ms. Lao: ... Hello.
Gabby: Okay, bye.
Gabby LEAAAAVE
Sherwood Cotter: Dictators, my friend, dictators.
You'd be naive to deny the existence of despots to this day.
Forrest: I heard you called in sick, today. Are you feeling any better.
Narrator : And they're off!
Steph: But... I mean, those are bad.
Gabby: ...You think that guy'll buy a hot chocolate? I forget how much they even
cost.
Narrator : They see, as they walk, Mr. Pink, sitting at a cafe
Jaime wheeeee
Mr. Pink notices them and waves
Jaime: Do people still drink hot chocolate?
Mr. Pink: Hey kids!

Gabby waves back and half-smiles politely
Jaime notices him, and waves back once with his free hand
Gabby: Well, I do. I make it at home, though.
Ms. Lao: Yes.
My stomach has been very badly pained.
Jaime: Ah.
Jaime to Mr. Pink
Jaime: Rainy day, isn't it?
Forrest: ....I see. I'm sorry to hear that.
Sherwood Cotter: Of course not, but there is wisdom in it for them.
Gabby: The secret is that you use milk and not water. That makes it taste good.
...Too much milk kinda fricks with me, though.
Sherwood Cotter: Still, it is thoroughly entertaining, these old politics.
Jaime: ...Wait, so you just add the powder to the milk?
Mr. Pink: Wow, you can say that again!
I just sat down and it's like Hurricane Herman out here!
Steph: I prefer reading, like... um, fiction.
Gabby: Yeah. Well, like, you boil it and stuff.
Didja come here before the rain started?
Mr. Pink: Yeah, I did.
Good thing for the tarp, right?
Mr. Pink points at the covering above the cafe
Jaime: Are you going to camp out here?
Ms. Lao: ...
Ms. Lao pulls a rag out of her pocket and hacks into it
Gabby: Frickin' seriously... You got an umbrella?
Sherwood Cotter: Ah- I enjoy classical fiction- authors like Dante, Homer, Sopho
cles.
Forrest: .......
Steph: Oh. Old stuff.
Forrest: .......Are you suffering from other maladies.
Mr. Pink: No, I don't gots not umbrella! What the plan is...
I'm going to wait for someone naive to come.
And I'm going to steal their umbrella.
Gabby: Don't get caught, or they'll like, flog you.
Mr. Pink: Don't worry!
I've got the timing down to a T.
Gabby nods sagely
Gabby: Good.
Snap like a frickin' anglefish or whatever.
Ms. Lao looks at the rag for a second, before balling it up and putting it back
in her pocket
Jaime: How'll you be sure they won't run after you?
Ms. Lao: ... I don't think you'd want to hear about it...
Forrest: ...I do.
Mobile L: Forrest Freeman: Stealth Therapist
Sherwood Cotter: Yes, old stuff.
There is nothing new under the sun, as it goes, and it is helpful to study the b
uilding blocks.
Forrest: Only if you're willing to talk about it, of course. I don't want to be
presumptuous.
Sherwood Cotter: The Inferno was a revenge fantasy on Dante's part, you know?
Steph: Yeah, it was political too.

Mr. Pink: Easy, easy, I'll run faster.
Jaime: On slippery ground?
Mr. Pink: But, for now, I'm waiting for some friends.
Yeah, it's part of this new game I invented called: Who can get the most concuss
ions in one week?
Ms. Lao looks at him, tired
Ms. Lao: ...
Mobile L: ...Nyeheheh, frick. What if one of your friends is the umbrella-haver?
Ms. Lao: I have been vomiting.
Forrest looks at her, tired
Forrest: .....I see.
Gabby: god in heaven, please smite me
Ms. Lao: Suffering from fever.
Forrest nods
Jaime: Who're you waiting for?
Ms. Lao: And headaches.
In addition to apparent swelling in my abdomen.
Forrest: .......
Sherwood Cotter: I do enjoy the Inferno- it is the most famous of the Comedy, an
d for good reason.
People enjoy the negative side of things, it's catharsis.
Mr. Pink: I wouldn't doubt they would bring umbrellas...
Oh, just some old friends of mine.
Forrest: ....I see.
I was about to say "stomach flu," but......
Steph has been a little surprised throughout this that he's holding a civil conv
ersation when she was a jerk to him
Gabby: That's cool. Hope you guys have fun and stuff, and don't get, like, too m
any dang concussions.
Steph: I haven't actually read any of them.
Sherwood Cotter: I did, when I was young, and had more time for reading.
Savour your youth, it doesn't last long.
Ms. Lao: ...
where is fucks mcleod
Steph: I'll be sure to do that.
Mobile L: Cotter reminds me a bit of Breen
Jaime: Ah. Why meet out here, close to the open rain?
Mr. Pink: Well, we didn't know it would be raining.
Or we would have met somewhere else.
Space: it's raining somewhere else
Sherwood Cotter nods
Sherwood Cotter: I'll see you later.
Remember, vote Conservative.
This country needs you.
Sherwood Cotter heads out the door with his books
Steph: Yeah, nice talking to you.
Forrest: ......Do you visit the library often, Ms. Lao.
Steph aaaaaaAAaah politicians
Jaime: What if it's raining somewhere else?
Ms. Lao: I do.
Forrest: .....I haven't seen you read anything.
Ms. Lao has a book on the table

Forrest is it open
Mr. Pink: Well, then we'd be indoors.
And it wouldn't matter.
Mr. Pink looks down the street
Jaime glances over to see how big the caf is indoors
Jaime: Why's that?
Mr. Pink quickly makes a gesture and turns back to Jaime
Mr. Pink: it's p. small
Jaime was gonna follow where he was looking, but...
Mr. Pink: Because we wouldn't be getting rained at.
roll mind
Steph returns to checking out the Latest Social Media Scoop
Mac D.: iiiiiiis it open
the book
Ms. Lao: duff
wait your fucking turn
and no, the book is not open
Mac D.: tyvm :3
Jaime:
Normal Mind Test
Rolling 3d20 Mind for
"11 "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
why that background
Forrest: ....Did you just finish reading that one.
Mac D.: barrels of mead
the kind of storage you would find
Jaime: git wasted, bra
Mac D.: in a tavern
Narrator : Jaime sees a figure, perhaps they are familiar, but they have vanishe
d into the crowd too quickly.
Jaime: ...Right.
Mobile L: aaaa, sorry, I am intermittently being talked at and am just sorta pat
iently waiting for it to conclude
Jaime resists the urge to shake his head
Narrator : Well, steph.
rolling 1d20
(
10
)
= 10
Fawkes M.: I think 10's gonna be my limit, since I have an essay I'm technically
revising
Narrator : ok
It looks like The Enemy School Sports Team won yesterday's baseball game
Liz Rubik scored a home run
Steph: ...Good for her...
Steph looks up
Steph: ...?
Steph looks around for forrest

Ms. Lao: Yes.
Ms. Lao nudges it over to him
(
16
)
= 16
name just
a really
optimistic
chipper book
Mobile L: I only read sad shit :,(
Fawkes M.: It's Okay To Be Gay! Even When It Isn't
Mac D.: i suppose Mein Kampf could be considered optimistic
Fawkes M.: It really is
Space: tom sawyer
no
Fawkes M.: No
Space: that one has a murderer
Fawkes M.: Mein Kampf
Narrator : Huckleberry Finn, i don't give a shit
Forrest looks down at the book
Fawkes M.: ass
Gabby: nooooo, mein kampf
Mobile L: fuck an entire duck
Forrest: .....
....A cheery read.
Gabby looks at Jaime like "i really wanna go home now"
Mr. Pink is about to keep talking when a police car sails by
Mr. Pink: ... Jeez...
Jaime: ...Well, we gotta beat the rain. See-Space: brb a sec, donot wait up 4 me
Jaime: ...you.
Gabby: ...Yeah, uh... Later, Mr. Pink. Enjoy the lunch.
Steal a good, large umbrella.
Jaime nods
Jaime: And don't hit your head
Ms. Lao stares at him
Forrest: ....?
Mr. Pink: Well, I'll try.
Ms. Lao: ... Is there something you want.
Jaime: .
Jaime waves, before leading with ZA UMBURERA
Fawkes M.: Nest 2H throwdown, he's gonna be using that as a lance
*Next
Forrest: ....Oh, no. I just wanted to get to know my history teacher.
Gabby bai baiiiii... aaaaaaa grandpa better be home, frickin' wanna force my fri
end to watch Law and Order
Jaime is utterly clueless to his study buddy's evil, evil plans

Narrator : They go on their trek.
on-to-ottawa
rolling 1d20
(
17
)
= 17
they make it to vietnam without any interruption
Jaime HEY BUBBA
Ms. Lao: ...
Gabby saigon... frick... still in saigon... is GRANDPA and/or GRANDMA home????
Eunice Trn is home
Forrest: I've heard good things about you from the other students, so I wanted t
o have a chat with you in person.
Gabby :D
Gabby: Grandma, hey!
Mac D.: LIES
SHE IS CLEARLY AT THE LIBRARY
Jaime nods
Jaime: Good evening.
Jaime is still carrying a sopping umbreller
Eunice Trn: wrong one
Jasper Trn is home
Jasper Trn is snoring on his favorite recliner
Gabby: why the frick did you clone my grandma frick you
Jaime: i said good evening to a corpse
Gabby: ...Oop... Shhhhh. Just, uh... set it over by the coat rack.
Ms. Lao: ...
Jaime nods, then attempts to do it with STEALF
Ms. Lao: I see.
Narrator : stealth success
Jaime: aww, i was gonna role
Gabby: Grandpa needs his beauty rest.
Narrator : by all means
roll
finesse
what the fuck
Jaime:
Normal Finesse Test
"11 "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Eunice Trn: GABBY GET OVER HERE AND LET ME PINCH YOUR CHEEKS
Narrator : why is eunice talking
Eunice Trn: CMERE YOU LITTLE SHNUGGUMS MWUH MWUH
Narrator : what the fuck
Space: i back
Narrator : there we go
i dicked with the wrong thing
Jasper remains asleep.
Jaime: So... we have homework to do, right?
(
5
)
= 5
...
Steph is now searching the library for Forrest
Narrator : no steph
your fone
social networking
The police are going to renew their investigation of the missing persons at Belm
ont.
Forrest: ....I was unaware of......that, however, so I'm guessing I won't be hav
ing you as a history teacher, anyway.
Space: o shit
Narrator : The school is going to receive a much of cops up the ass.
Steph ...
Gabby: Yeah, some. Let's frickin' get on it, yeah?
And maybe...
Steph thinks, 'this is going to make things a lot harder for us'
Gabby: ...When Grandma gets home and stuff...
...If you're still around...
...We cooooould...
Narrator : nd
the head
Jaime: ...We could?
Narrator : of the investigation
is
Gabby: Watch Law & Order?
Narrator : Officer P. Quest
Steph: ........
Steph has a sinking feeling
Gabby: I mean, I haven't shown you guys.
But it's really good.
Officer Quest: "We will, at all costs, put an end to this and prosecute the crim
inals behind this to the fullest extent of the law."
Steph has a really, very bad feeling
Ms. Lao: ...
Steph forwards that article to the other partymembers phones
Ms. Lao: I can still teach.
Jaime: ...
Narrator : bringity-ding, their fones get the forwarded message
Forrest: ....Do you intend to?
Gabby: ...Ah frickin'... Sheez.
Ms. Lao: Of course.
Narrator : On the tv, in Gabby's house, it's the news.
Jaime: Well, I don't know how soon I'll need to be back.
If it's too late...
Gabby is just grouchily looking at this news
Steph tries to find any more pertinent info

Narrator : They're talking about local millionaire philanthropist, John Ruddman.
He's doing an interview.
Gabby: ...Yeah, that's fine... Just, if you're able and stuff... Rrrrrrgh, those.
.. Those fricking...
Narrator : He apparently just donated a bunch of money to the police.
Jaime: ...Those "fricking" politicians?
Narrator : duff
Gabby: ...Jaime.
Mac D.: ye
Gabby: If I see them again.
Narrator : lao talked to him
Mac D.: ya i'm thinking of a reply
Gabby: None of them will make it out alive.
(
16
)
= 16
Forrest: ....Canadians get paid maternity leave, correct?
Jaime: ...Is it really that important to you?
Narrator : Steph finds that the disappeared people number 11
Jaime: I mean, I'd just rather stick my head above all this.
Narrator : 9 of them students.
Steph: ...
Steph looks to see who the non-students are
Ms. Lao: doesn't say
Gabby: ...The cops aren't gonna stick their heads above killing children.
Ms. Lao: ... Yes.
Forrest: I apologize for asking.....I'm American, you see. For how long?
Steph: ....
Jaime: ...Oh, I thought you were just talking about Ruddman.
John Ruddman: On the TV: "It has long been a personal interest of mine- the poli
ce. And what with this awful... tragic series of people vanishing, I feel its on
ly right to give back to the community."
Steph does the article say anything about when the disappearances started
Narrator : says like the past two months
Gabby: Yeah, no, just his cop buddies. We need justice. We need them to not ever
make another retarded escape.
If their snake agenda needs children blood, they can... they can just frick right
off and drown in a lake of pee and... and go to heck...
Steph forwards this as well
Jaime: ...Right. Yeah, you're right.
Steph goes ahead and forwards the one about the rally too
Jaime is ignoring the fact that he pays zero attention to politics
Jaime: *isn't mentioning, god i'm sleepy
*ish
Gabby then realizes she may be angry-ing too loudly and tries to shoosh a little
so she doesn't wake Grandpa
Fawkes M.: I've just been in a perpetual state of drowsiness for the past couple
weeks
Mobile L: Have you been drinking enough water?
Gabby:
Gabby sighs deeply and rubs her temples

Ms. Lao: Sixteen weeks, for this region, anyway.
wait
wait, shut up forrest wait
Forrest: ok
Jaime: ...Should we just get started? With the homework, I mean.
Gabby: ...Yeah. Yeah, let's... yeah.
You hungry at all, Jaime? I think we still have some ph leftover from last night.
Ms. Lao: 19 weeks.
Gabby is alreddy gettin' out her homework stuff
Jaime: Oh, um - sure. What's pho?
Forrest: ....I see.
Gabby: Noodle soup, basically. Real good stuff, Grandma's basically the ultimate
pro at it, ever.
Forrest: I apologize if I'm being nosey with all these questions.
Ms. Lao shrugs
Gabby: Get your stuff out and all, I'll warm up a couple bowls.
Jaime: ...Alright, if you're offering.
Thanks.
Jaime starts gitting it out
Narrator : steph forwards the message
Gabby: Sure. Ph's good for rainy days like these.
Steph: ...Okay.
Gabby:
Forrest: ...
Gabby peeps at the MESSAGE while getting the Vietnamese-ass soup warmed up for h
erself and Jaime
Jaime: ...
Jaime decides he has to ask
Jaime: So how's Ken doing?
Gabby: ...Man... Pretty good, I... I think? Haven't, uhh... talked to him a lot
today, but I hope he's...
...What... What do you think it is, that, um...?
...That he... has...?
Forrest looks out the nearest window to see if it's still raining
Narrator : yes
it is
it's gotten worse
Forrest any worse and it's gonna be a fuckin flash flood
Narrator : basically
Gabby sounds like that question's been trapped inside her for a long time
Narrator : people begin leaving the library
Jaime: ...I'm not sure.
Forrest: ....
Jaime: But, I know that he needs painkillers for it.
Steph: ...?
Gabby: ...Frickin'...
Steph: ...
Gabby: ...He's just... He's so...
Steph: Nothing for it.
Steph goes to find Forrest once more

Gabby: ...So okay with it, somehow...
Narrator : there he is!

Forrest: ...
Gabby: ...It shouldn't... It shouldn't have to be that way... If something's fri
cked up, you should... be upset about it...
Steph: Hey! Forrest!
Forrest: ....?
Forrest looks over at Steph
Ms. Lao: ...
Steph: ...And... Ms. Lao.
Hi, Ms. Lao.
Jaime: ...Probably beats having it eat away at you.
Ms. Lao: Hello.
Jaime: That'd be even more inconvient.
Forrest: Where've you been.
Jaime: *inconvenient
Gabby: ...I... I mean, I guess...
Steph: I was looking stuff up.
Gabby: If it was me... I'dI'd just be real frickin'... ticked.
With... with God, or the universe, or whatever.
Forrest: I see, did you find anything interesting.
Jaime: ...Yeah. I know what you mean.
Steph: Maybe if you checked your phone once in a while you'd know.
Forrest: ...?
Forrest pulls out his phone and gives it a looksy
Forrest: ........
.......Oh.
Gabby finally gets the SOPA out and sets it at the table
Gabby: ...Ken is very strong...
Forrest: Well, that's going to be a pain.
Forrest puts his phone away
Jaime: ...Think it's because of the circumstances?
Jaime looks down at it
Steph: Yeppers.
Forrest: Did you just say "Yeppers."
Gabby: ...I think it's just how he is. I think maybe he was born like that.
Gabby https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/9/99/Ph%E1%BB%9F_b%C3
%B2%2C_C%E1%BA%A7u_Gi%E1%BA%A5y%2C_H%C3%A0_N%E1%BB%99i.jpg/1024px-Ph%E1%BB%9F_b%
C3%B2%2C_C%E1%BA%A7u_Gi%E1%BA%A5y%2C_H%C3%A0_N%E1%BB%99i.jpg
Jaime: It'd be hard to know.
Mac D.: look at this zalgo shit
it hurts my eyes looking at it
Jaime goes to try a bit of le ZALGO noodle
Gabby: don't talk that way about my grandparents' language you fricker
Ms. Lao: racist
Gabby: yehhh
Steph: Yeppers!
Gabby is nice, gud broth
Ms. Lao: ...
Forrest: That is embarrassing.
Ms. Lao is watching them with dead eyes

Gabby: ...Humans have come a long way with life expectancy and stuff.
Used to, if you got a cold, you'd probably die.
Forrest: I intend to stay here until either the rain lets up or the library clos
es, what are you going to do.
Gabby eats her azn a f foods in between talking
Jaime: Yeah. I couldn't imagine living in that sort of medieval world, or time.
Jaime also eating and talking
Gabby: ...I think soon, Jaime. I think soon, all illnesses will be like that.
Penicillin is a very new thing, if you think about it.
So's vaccines.
Steph: I think it's closing soon.
Gabby: So's chemotherapy.
Jaime: All in the past... 150 years, right?
Gabby vigorous nod
Forrest: Well then, I'll stay until it closes.
Steph: Me too.
Forrest: Okay, then.
Gabby: All thanks to science. All thanks to people innovating and just... not gi
ving up.
Narrator : The library eventually closes.

Gabby: ...Something bigger is around the corner, Jaime. I can... I just... I know
.
Forrest stands out in the street in the rain
Forrest wet and unhappy
Jaime: Like, a sort of breakthrough?
Narrator : Lao begins walking home.
Forrest watches her go
Forrest: ....
Jasper watches the two of them
Gabby: Yes... We're gonna move further forward, further away from pain and death
and all that stuff than we ever have before. But it's...
...People will have to make it happen.
Steph: ...Hi.
Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks over at Jasper
Jasper: Hello.
Gabby: Polio didn't go and cure itself.
Forrest: ....Yeah, hi. Did you need something.
Jasper: No.
Jaime nods, as he continues to eat
Forrest: Alright, then. I would like to go somewhere dry very fast, so if you do
n't mind
Gabby: Humans need someone to come up and push things forward every now and then
. Innovators. Inventors.
Gabby sighs sadly

Gabby: ...Sometimes it feels like nobody's trying to, though.
Jasper: I don't.
Jaime: rolling 1d20
(
11
)
= 11
Forrest: Okay, then.
Forrest: Are you heading home.
Jaime: You have to be in the right place at the right time, don't you? Like... T
esla.
Before you can make something big.
Jasper: gabby, it's me, elrond
write dianetics but in vietnemes
Jaime: schiebe, where is mobile
Steph: Uh... yeah, sure.
Mobile L: worry not, i live
Forrest: Alright, then. I'll see you tomorrow.
Forrest starts making his way for home as quickly as he can
Jaime: I was gonna have him say "Edison" instead of "Tesla" if I rolled 10 or le
ss
Gabby: no frick you, go buttfrick miscavidge
oh my god, ahahaha
Narrator : Forrest goes home
Forrest WARM, DRY HOME
Narrator : but runs into hall
Gabby: ...That's... Yeah. That's exactly right. And what I want, Jaime...
Forrest FUCK
Gabby: ...Most of all...
Forrest: .....
Forrest looks up at Hall
Dr. Hall: Ah, hello to you, child.
Gabby: ...Is to be in that right place, at that right time. I want to...
Steph starts walking home herself
Forrest: ......Hello, Dr. Hall.
Gabby: ...I want to stop these things people take for granted from even happenin
g.
Dr. Hall: Rather unpleasant out today, isn't it?
The rain makes some people quite gloomy.
Forrest: Yes. I'm trying to get home.
Dr. Hall: Of course.
Wish your parents well for me.
Gabby: I want Ken to wake up tomorrow and not have to wonder if it's his last da
y.
Jaime: ...
Forrest: .......See you tomorrow, Dr. Hall.
Forrest continues on his way
Dr. Hall nods
Gabby: I want my grandparents, both of them, to see the year 2050, and then some
.
Narrator : He comes to his home, with Lel Shitkid drawing pictures
Gabby:
...I want Naomi to live again...

Forrest wrings out his clothes
Forrest: Hey, Sooz.
Jaime: ...Even if she doesn't return back the way she was?
Gabby: ...If she doesn't.
Then.
...Then I'll... I'll fricking make it so.
Jaime nods, after a second's pause
Jaime: Yeah. I bet you can.
Narrator : Steph heads home, where she sees that Karling's umbrella is wet in it
s holder.
Steph: ...?
Narrator : Ronald is in his study.
Mac D.: suzie
Steph knocks on the doorframe
Mac D.: has got some damage
Steph: I'm home!
Fawkes M.: Her TRUE SELF
Mobile L: jeeeezus, sooz, what's your DEAL
Lel Shitkid: Hi, big bro!
Gabby: ...Thank you. I... I think so, too.
Forrest: You making art?
Fawkes M.: Damn
Gabby: ...I mean...
Fawkes M.: I'm at 13% battery
Gabby: ...Even if I'm most likely wrong. The small percentage chance that I'm no
t... That is worth it to me.
Mobile L: Frick
Ride the horse until it coughs up blood and dies
Lel Shitkid: Yeah!
It's a chimera!
Jaime: Just because they're correct doesn't mean they're right?
They being the skeptics, I mean.
Forrest: A chimera, huh? Let's take a look.
Forrest looks at the PICCHUR
Gabby: ...Yeah, oh yeah, pretty much that. Nyeheh...
Ronald Karling steps out of his study
Ronald Karling: So am I.
Jaime: ...That... also sounded better in my head.
Gabby just looks intensely shounen anime r/n
Ronald Karling opens his arms to hug Steph
Gabby: ...No, no, don't knock it. You're a poet or something, I think.
Lel Shitkid drew some mishmash of various monsters
Steph gives Karl a hug
Jaime: Really, now?
Lel Shitkid: kind of looks like a purple/red/green/orange nihilist
Forrest: Dang, that's one fierce-looking monster...
Gabby: Yeah, nyeheheh! Could give Steph a run for her, ehhh... book money, I gue
ss.
Lel Shitkid: Chimera!
Gabby SOOPSLURP
Lel Shitkid points at the open dictionary
Mobile L: Forrest's interactions with Sooz melt my cold innards
Steph: So, uh, there's this thing going on in a few days, like... for the missin
g people and stuff. Is it okay if I go and check it out?
Forrest: Right, right, Chimera.....No doubt this is going up on the fridge.
Ronald Karling: Oh, I was just about to talk to you about that.
I was hoping to attend myself.
Jaime: Wait - what?
Lel Shitkid: It is?
Oh, yay!
Steph: Oh, good.
'Cause, um...
Gabby: ...Y'know, Steph likes books and stuff and, like... writes?
Lel Shitkid: I drew you, big bro!
Forrest: ...Oh, you did? Let's see me.
Gabby: ...Maybe you 'n her could do some kinda collab thing.
Lel Shitkid hands him a paper
Steph: ...Um, you know Naomi? Naomi Way?
Gabby ;D
Forrest looks at it
Jaime: ...Oh. Never mind. Yeah, that could work...
Jaime gits back to eating
Lel Shitkid: it's a (flattering, if crude) depiction of him, labelled "big bro",
with a (crude) depiction of her next to him
Gabby: Frick yeah.
Gabby polishes off her soops
Forrest smiles
Ronald Karling: Mmmm, you've mentioned her before, I believe.
Ronald Karling strokes his beard
Mobile L: aaaaa forrest
Jaime: ...So - what kind of writing does she do, exactly?
Fawkes M.: Steady at 11%
Steph: Y- yeah, so... I mean, I'm... y'know, worried about her, and stuff.
Forrest: Man, the spitting image of me....
Gabby: ...I'unno, beats me, just see her do it a lot. Probably fiction or someth
ing.
Lel Shitkid: I know!
Forrest: Not a bad self-portrait of you, either.
Space: forrest is a good bro
Lel Shitkid: Thanks!
Jaime: Well, fiction does have a broad range.
Ronald Karling: Oh, I see.
She's missing then.
Forrest: So...Is Dad home yet?
Steph: Yeah, she's...
Lel Shitkid: Yeah, he's sleeping!
Steph: She hasn't, um... been at school.
Jaime: I mean, a kids' book isn't like a science fiction novel.
With, like... different pages.
Forrest: Ah, okay. Work must've been rough.
Fawkes M.: godDAMMIT I'm on the service battery
Lel Shitkid: He was really happy!

Fawkes M.: MOBILEEEEEE
Lel Shitkid: what is the service battery
Fawkes M.: Emergency power
Forrest: Really? Did he say why he was so happy?
Fawkes M.: The juice Arnie needed to kill the T-1000
Lel Shitkid: He liked work!
Ronald Karling: Mmm, I see.
Mobile L: http://vocaroo.com/i/s1IKs4LVxQAq
Ronald Karling: Well, we'll keep her in our thoughts and be sure to attend.
Mobile L: aaaaa sorry, I was rrecord
Fawkes M.: aaaaaaHHHHHH
5%
Mobile L: fuuuuug
Fawkes M.: I gotta bow out
Forrest: Oh, that's good.
Space: fare well
Fawkes M.: Byeeeeeeeeeee...
Fawkes M. falls
Mobile L: Later, brah, thanks for hanging in their, kitty
Forrest: I'm heading up to my room now, okay? Come see me if you need anything o
r just want to play games.
Forrest: Atta girl.
Forrest heads up to his ruum
Steph: Thanks.
Lel Shitkid begins crawling all over Bryce, like an exotic parasite
Steph clearly concerned about something here
Steph: I, uh - I've got some homework I've got to be working on.
Gabby totes finished that convo and also totes finished studying
(
7
)
= 7
As the day goes on, Gabby does indeed get to watch Law and Order with Jaime.
The episode, sadly, is a rerun.
Forrest goes to his COMPUTAH
Narrator : that gab has seen
Ronald Karling: ... Of course.
Gabby ffffffffrrrgh... o well, at least she could better inform him on the show'
s structure and crap
Gabby ...is this what having siblings is like
Ronald Karling: Remember Steph, if anything is bothering you, you can come to me
.
Ronald Karling tussles her hair
Steph smiles
Narrator : His adoring audience awaits, still in a frenzy about the water.
Space: how many notes does the water post have
Narrator : like
300
and counting
it just took right the fuck off
Steph: Yeah, yeah...
Steph brings her backpack up to her room
Narrator : steph saw it on her social media feed
Forrest his fans can wait, there's work to be done....!
Space: that's how popular it is
Narrator : Forrest begins his work.
Steph promptly whips out her phone when she arrives upstairs
Steph: ....
Forrest begins research into THE NET on the Belmont Board of Health
Steph there's got to be someone to talk to who is 1. already involved in this
(
3
)
= 3
Steph and 2. Not your Grandfather
Narrator : They exist.
Mac D.: should i not roll mind for this
Steph: ....
Mac D.: this is no gavel lake we are TT
Steph texts Gabby
Narrator : roll mind, ci
*cuntwad
(
16
+
11
+
5
)+1
= 33
Steph: 'are u there'
Narrator : Well, they're known for generally being inept.
Gabby: 'UH YEAH, HI. SAW THE ARTICLES. FRICKED UP.'
Narrator : And no one has much nice to say about them.
They're all middle-aged or old white men.
Steph: 'Your caps lock is on'
Forrest: ....
Narrator : Most have a bit of a paunch.
Gabby: 'OH. IS THAT LIKE BAD?'
Forrest nice to know they at least have bad PR
Narrator : They're all important figures in the community.
Steph: 'iguess not reallyy...?'
Gabby: 'OKAY. HOW'S IT GOING AND STUFF'
Steph: 'bad'
Forrest tries to look into any policies they've enacted over the course of their
tenure
Narrator : The mayor, Victor Sherrings is on it
generally not much
Forrest: .....What's a mayor doing on a Health Board?
Narrator : they've kept the status qup
Gabby has texted in a scream voice her whole life
Narrator : *quo
Gabby: 'FRICK. HOW'
Narrator : apparently the mayor is a retired doctor
Steph: 'about naomi'
Gabby:
'WITH THE VIGIL THING, OR DID SOMEONE FIND BAD STUFF'
Narrator : that's it
Gabby does not want to type "HER BODY" for security reasons
Steph: 'vigil thing made me think'
Gabby: 'DO WE NOT HAVE MANY DAYS LEFT'
Steph: 'we need to come up with something soon'
Narrator : also it's friday
Space: what we need
is a third heaven calendar
Gabby: 'ARE WE IN AGREEANCE THAT WE'RE GONNA GO THROUGH WITH THE THING'
Narrator : can one of you be my slave
Forrest: .......
Narrator : and make one
Gabby: 'BECAUSE I WANT TO GO THROUGH WITH THE THING'
Space: yeah gimme a sec
Steph: 'i do too'
Forrest crafts a theory that the Board of Health is a front and the men involved
are meeting for some other purpose
Forrest writes this shit in his notes
Gabby: 'FOREST IS PROBABLY APATHETIC, AND I DON'T WANNA ASK JAIME RIGHT NOW BECA
USE WE WATCHED LAW AND ORDER AND I WANT HIS ENJOYMENT TO BE UNTAINTED'
Forrest and proceeds to make a blog post about his theory
Space: what's the date in 3rd heaven
(
11
+
11
+
10
)+1
= 33
Narrator : it's october
Gabby: 'SO IT'S P MUCH UNAINMOUS (SP?)'
Narrator : it's a solid post
Steph: 'i was gonna do it w/ or w/out what anyone else thought'
Narrator : just pick a date
Forrest EN-TER
Gabby: 'GOOD. AS YOU SHOULD.'
Narrator : and gets some shit, coasting off of his newfound popularity
Gabby: 'IT'S A NOBLE THING'
Forrest , now that his quota is fulfilled, checks the conversation on his Bottle
d Water Post
Narrator : mostly confusion
because
this random
canadian town
no one knows what
Oh, people are rallying right the fuck behind this post.
Narrator : There is a circlejerk of epic proportions.
Gabby: 'NEXT CHANCE WE GET WE'RE GONNA DO IT'
Forrest oh good, let the people shoult
Forrest soon the suits in their high towers will hear them, and spit the not-act
ually-from-mountain-springs-mountain springwater out their mouths
Gabby: 'FRICK WHAT ANYONE ELSE THINGS, NAOMI DESERVED BETTER'
'*THINKS'
Steph: 'im glad that i am not the only one who thinks this'
Space: http://teamup.com/ks11f3df36e95dd623/
Gabby: 'ME TOO. SOMETIMES PEOPLE ARE REALLY PURITAN ABOUT THIS SORT OF THING AND
IT PEEVES ME THE H*LL OFF'
'SORRY IF THAT LANGUAGE WAS TOO COLOURFUL'

Forrest decides to text Steph about his findings in the Board of Health
Space: switch to 'month' view
Forrest: 'Hey.'
Gabby: 'I JUST FEEL VERY STRONGLY ABOUT THIS ISSUE'
Forrest texts with heavy attention to proper punctuation
Steph: 'oh forrest just texted me'
@forrest: 'hi'
Forrest: 'I did some looking into the Board of Health'
Gabby: 'MAKE SURE HE'S DOING OKAY, I KIND OF WORRY ABOUT HIM LATELY'
Narrator : i forget
did mr. mu say you had twelve days yesterday
Steph: 'what did u find'
Mobile L: Gabfact #269: Gabby learned the uppercase in text thing from her grand
parents
Mac D.: yyyyES
Space: yeah
Mobile L: S
Steph: @gabby: 'forrest is forrest is forrest'
Forrest: 'Well for starters they don't do shit and everyone dislikes them,'
Mobile L: 'I STILL WORRY KINDA THOUGH :-/'
Gabby: f r i ck
Forrest: 'It's also composed entirely of wealthy public figures, including the m
ayor.'
Space: set it up so that you can make events different colors
i'm powerful
Narrator : well not WEALTHY
but pillars of the community
Steph: 'one of the snake fucks is on it'
'ditto hall'
Forrest: 'Yes you told me this.'
Steph: @gabby: 'forrest is forrest is forrest is forrest is forrest is forrest'
Gabby: 'OKAY SHEEEEESH, TAP THE BREAKS GIRLFRIEND :-P'
Forrest: 'Official records say they haven't done much at all and mostly just mai
ntain the status quo.'
Gabby just makes the most sparse, infuriating typos

Steph: 'i can go on ad infinitum'
@forrest: 'rich old white man club'
Gabby: 'MRUH'
Forrest: 'Basically. I'm sure the Board of Health thing's just a front.'
Steph: 'so'
'how are you and jaime doing'
@forrest: 'for snake club?'
Forrest: 'You said only one Snake Club member was on the board.'
Gabby: 'WE'RE GOOD, WE ATE SOME PHO AND STUDIED AND I MADE HIM WATCH LAW & ORDER
'
'YOU SHOULD ALSO WATCH LAW & ORDER'
Steph: 'one that we know of at this point'
'i do not really trust many authority figures by now you see'
Forrest: 'It's possible, but it could also be possible that it's just an excuse
to get away from their wives or spend money on stupid shit or whatever.'
Steph: @gabby: 'and you should read in cold blood'
'did you ever read in cold blood gabby'
@forrest: 'would they have like club minutes just lying around somewhere? we cou
ld find them potentially'
Forrest: 'Maybe in whatever building they hold their meetings in.'
Gabby: 'NO, WHAT IS THAT ABOUT? IS IT A MYSTERY MURDER THING?'
Steph: 'let's see if these sort of things are free for public perusal'
@gabby: 'it is true crime'
Gabby: 'OH GOOD. I LIKE STUFF LIKE THAT.'
Forrest: 'Hang on, I'm at my computer, I'll look that up.'
Forrest proceeds to look that up
Gabby: 'DO YOU THINK THEY HAVE IT AT THE LIBRARY'
Narrator : what if you can just look at their minutes
no
Steph: 'i'm sure they do'
Forrest: 'Yeah, no.'
Steph: 'we have in our employ a person who is literally called 'The Outlaw''
Gabby: 'GOOD. GOOD.'
'STEPH HAVE YOU EVER HAD PHO BEFORE'

Forrest: 'Who, Hair Gel.'
Steph: 'no, is it good?'
@forrest: 'ya'
'Hair Gel'
Gabby: 'IT'S REALLY GOOD AND YOU SHOULD HAVE SOME NEXT TIME YOU COME OVER'
Forrest: 'Are you implying that he break into the building and steal the records
.'
Gabby: 'GRANDMA IS REALLY GOOD AT MAKING IT'
Steph: 'that sounds good'
'your grandparents are really nice'
Mobile L: awww fuck, 10 mins remain
Gabby: ':-)'
Steph: @forrest: 'well saying that would be incriminating'
Space: noo
Narrator : wrap it up
Gabby: 'MAYBE LIKE'
'SOMETIME I COULD GET THEM TO TAKE YOU GUYS TO BINGO NIGHT'
'THAT WOULD BE REALLY COOL'
Gabby just
Gabby the sheltered-est, most innocent ideas of a good time
Forrest: 'I do not believe that a thuggish high school student has the capabilit
y to successfully steal government records and not get caught.'

Steph: 'oh my god'
'imagine forrest playing bingo'
@forrest: 'i'll run it by him next time we meet'
Forrest: 'I do not want to see his face on the local news tomorrow.'
Gabby: 'YES, LET'S BRING HIM. MAYBE HE KNOWS SOME TEXAS BINGO SECRETS?'
Steph: 'we can see what he thinks about it all
*'
@gabby: 'all learned from his time at the bingo rodeo or whatever the fuck it is
they do there'
Gabby: 'TEXAS TWO STEP'
'OR WAIT UHHHHHH'
'WAS IT HOLD EM?'
'SOMETHING'
'I NEED TO ASK MY TEXAN COUSINS AGAIN;
'THEY KNOW ALL THE TEXAS STUFF'
Steph: 'you have texas cousins?'
Forrest: ....
Narrator : texas cousins
the worst kind
Gabby: 'YEAH, A LOT, IN THE DALLAS AREA. THEY DON'T EVER SHUT UP ABOUT IT, EITHE
R. ALWAYS POSTING PICTURES OF CHALUPAS AND STUFF ON THEIR FACEBOOK'
Narrator : i said wrap it up your motherfuckers
Forrest puts his phone away and retires to his bed,, staring up at his ceiling
Steph: 'nice'
'thanks gabby'
Steph turns her phone off, setting it gently down
Steph looks out the window at the rain
Gabby: 'OK, SEE YOU GUYS, PLEASE DO MAKE BINGO A THING, IT'S FUN'
Gabby beeeep
Gabby:
Gabby thinks about overcoming death and smiles a little, looking fondly at her s
leeping grandfather
Space: memento mori
Narrator : alright how was that
Gabby: no, forgetto mori
Mobile L: Was SEXY
Mac D.: did forrest get a social link with lao
also i missed third heb
Space: that session was good
i missed third heaven too
Mobile L: I also missed it
A good return
Mac D.: i look forward to playing it in ANOTHER seven months
Mobile L: Glad I got to do a motive rant
Those're always fun
Narrator : he has a social link now
any perceptions changed in regards to the npcs
Forrest: boo yah -slaps on Cool ShadesMac D.: i have a a fairly solid theory on what Ms. Lao's deal is
Narrator : what is it
Mac D.: no, no, I will not share...
Narrator : http://www.jkp.com/media/catalog/product/cache/1/image/800x800/9df78e
ab33525d08d6e5fb8d27136e95/9/7/9781849055253.jpg
http://ecx.images-amazon.com/images/I/51fHGV3DjiL._SY443_BO1,204,203,200_.jpg
http://www1.alibris-static.com/things-tom-likes-a-book-about-sexuality-and-mastu
rbation-for-boys-and-young-men-with-autism-and-related-conditions/isbn/978184905
5222.gif
Space: i am excited for the vigil
Narrator : no, you have to tell me
i'm the gm
i'm entitled to know
Mac D.: nawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Mobile L: Gabby is gonna show Jaime and Steph her secret fapbook
Space: Things Gabby Likes
Mac D.: not forrest though
Space: forrest doesn't deserve to see
Mobile L: Forrest would just stop her from publically masturbating
Mac D.: forrest would just kinkshame the shit out of her
Mobile L: aaaaa babbery, g'night
Mac D.: nite nite
Space: nite nite nite
Narrator : tell me you fucking cuntbag
Mac D.: NAWWWWWW
Narrator : please
Mac D.: in the discord
Space: no
in the rabbit
Mac D.: no
Narrator : hold on
Mac D.: ALSO tell me
does the Mansion Roll20 take place after Third Heaven
Narrator : https://rabb.it/Eldritch
Space: its like concurrent
Narrator : concurrently
Mac D.: ah ok
space let Canada Jojo take place in the future
so we can have Grown-Up Suzy Freeman
Space: i'll approve of this
Narrator : i would have to play her
Mac D.: would you do it
Narrator : yes
Mac D.: that's my BOY
Space: oh
my god
Jacques De Toulouse: I am the rival to zis clown.
Space: oh
my
GOD
martin is a good man
Jacques De Toulouse: I, unlike zis obese Englishman, could actually play zis gam
e.
Space: the only game he'd play would be baguette tossing
Jacques De Toulouse: there will be more stereotypes
Space: i'm proud of this
how about a german
http://vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/punchout/images/e/ea/Von_Kaiser2.jpg/revisio
n/latest?cb=20090414183158
Jacques De Toulouse: he was going to be here
it was going to be ww2 leaders basketball
Space: oh
my god
Jacques De Toulouse: stalin, hitler
mussolini
hirhito
Space: mussolini basketball

Jacques De Toulouse: *hirohito
Space: a hindenburg
Jacques De Toulouse: the president of the weiar republic
Space: interesing tht you picked him instead of hitler, i was just reading about
the enabling act today
Jacques De Toulouse: i didn't want literally hitler
Space: thats probably a good idea
Jacques De Toulouse: for the same reason i picked hirohito instead of the head o
f the japanese military
Space: that too is wise
here is my question
what are the team names
Jacques De Toulouse: what would the hometeam be called
Space: the thunderbirds
no
it was thunderbirds, but people complained
now it's thunderbolts
its mob
Mobile L: oh my god is that fuckin
ARE WE DOING AXIS POWERS SPORTALIA IN THIS BITCH?
Steph: we will defend our court, whatever the cost may be
we will shoot penalty shots in the hills, we will slam dunk in the streets, we w
ill never surrender
Gabby: come on and slam, and welcome to the jam
Steph: chaos dunk iblis
Mobile L: I drew this for the FGO RP, and I feel proud of it for some ungodly re
ason http://i.imgur.com/uppk4C3.png
Jacques De Toulouse: i like it
Steph: who is this serialkiller
fly like an eagle
Mobile L: The serial killer is Carmilla
She a Berserker and a vampire and a horrid creep
Sorry, am doing another draw
Steph: a good friend
how is f/go doing
Jacques De Toulouse: the coaches
Steph: i mistrust borys
Jacques De Toulouse: why
Steph: fucking commies
Jacques De Toulouse: who do you trust the most out of the coaches
and who the least
Steph: i trust martin the most and albert the least
Mobile L: Tanaka the most, Wolansky the least
eldritch s. (GM): why tanaka
and why albert
Steph: can't see albert's eyes
which students play basketball
Mobile L: Tanaka is a benign-looking grandpa
eldritch s. (GM): no one yet
they'll force people into them in due time
Steph: it's gonna be the great war
eldritch s. (GM): i like my national embodiments better than hetalia
Space: but seer they're not as attractive or young
eldritch s. (GM): they're all aging or old
also notice a thing i did
BM and AH
Benito Mussolini (Basilio Mondadori) and Adolf Hitler (Albert Hindenburg)
Space: enemies
eldritch s. (GM): just
these men
are basketball coaches
Space: where are the woman coaches
mysoginy among school faculty
eldritch s. (GM): belmont is run by old men
Space: simply disgusting
eldritch s. (GM): first the board of health
now this
Space: first jesus, now this
eldritch s. (GM): First Jesus, now this.
at least they're not all white
Space: that's true
i'm making a photomanip of civ v in a shameless ripoff of you
Jacques De Toulouse fought in the Algerian War
Space: old man
Mobile L: http://i.imgur.com/irErlfN.png
Space: the dragon
Mobile L: Cadmus is a majestic and noble woman
Hoooogh, gotta sleep now
Gud nacht
Space: nite nite
Steph: and you don't seem an honest man
a shame, you seemed to understand
Space: god this new computer is great
this HIGH RESOLUTION
Mobile L: I have cwm
Mac D.: FRIENDS
let me
cradle you
in my arms
eldritch s. (GM): quickly before we proceed
what happened last time, i'm a bit scattered brained
Fawkes M.: Something about the rain
Oh
Pho
Mac D.: Steph and Graham stuck around the library until it closed
Fawkes M.: At least for team Jaimegabby
Mac D.: Forrest
Fawkes M.: Graham
Mac D.: not Graham Forrest
Fawkes M.: Seriously
eldritch s. (GM): graham
Mac D.: i was thinking of something else
okay so Forrest and Steph stuck around the library until it closed
Mobile L: Ah yes
Graham
eldritch s. (GM): right right
remember
you two
glass
Mac D.: Forrest had another chat with Ms. Lao
Mobile L: Also bear with me, the map is fucking disappearing and reappearing on
me for god knows why
If I don't move my token, it means I am blind
eldritch s. (GM): right, for you all
it is
the weekend
and i'd like to ask you all how you would like to proceed with said weekend
Fawkes M.: Uh
I don't remember what I said
eldritch s. (GM): about
Mobile L: Ahhh shit, hmmm
Fawkes M.: The weekend
Hmmmmmmm
Wait
They still have That Filming Project
eldritch s. (GM): AH
YES
Mobile L: Oh yes
They do
Mac D.: that's not due in another few school days tho right
Fawkes M.: Yeah, but
Weekend
And they can procrastinate on the post-production
eldritch s. (GM): post is what you need
Mobile L: They need to go back to Breen's shitty restaurant
For St. Patty's day
Mac D.: do they celebrate that in canada
eldritch s. (GM): of course, but it's not march
it's october
Mac D.: HALLOWEEN
eldritch s. (GM): the date is the tenth
Mac D.: what's got space wrapped up
eldritch s. (GM): on the eleventh there is a memorial vigil for naomi
Mobile L: For St. Patty's day in the real world I mean
eldritch s. (GM): he's just a retard
Mobile L: a HOLIDAY SPECIAL.......
Fawkes M.: He's missing all of his face after shaving
eldritch s. (GM): he shaved too much
Mac D.: he has to glue it back on
eldritch s. (GM): on the 12th, douglas comes to town
Mac D.: DOOOOOGURAS
eldritch s. (GM): and on the week following the weekend, glass will be inspectin
g the school
there will be an increased police presence
Fawkes M.: Space
eldritch s. (GM): and turns out ruddman is some rich dickhead who is donating to
the police
Fawkes M.: The plot ended
Mobile L: I am presuming today is the tenth?
on the 19th are federal elections
Mobile L: Trying to think of what Gabby would want to do other than homework and
investigating
eldritch s. (GM): and the 20th is the deadline for the naomi choice
Fawkes M.: Remind me of the whole election part of the plot?
eldritch s. (GM): it's not important
just
canadian elections
Fawkes M.: Not Important
eldritch s. (GM): our country doesn't matter
Fawkes M.: Is that how TH ends?
Mac D.: what's important is what the elections are going to do
Fawkes M.: TH
True Hatred
eldritch s. (GM): you know the incumbent mp
Space: weekend fun = palling around town w/ friends
eldritch s. (GM): who is conservative
maybe the party should learn local politics

Mac D.: weekend fun = time to solve some FUCKING MYSTERIES
Mobile L: You guys please be my eyes, the map is refusing to show for me
Fawkes M.: Jaime's inactively conservative due to household atmosphere
People
Mobile L: This is making me cross
Fawkes M.: Everywhere
In Fuyuki
Space: refrosh?
Mac D.: did you try restarting the browser completely
eldritch s. (GM): belmont, the sister city of fuyuki
Space: yeah restart the browser
Mobile L: Let me try that. I had this problem in AdEVA earlier
Fawkes M.: They looked identical even in the Edo period
Mobile L: It suxxxxxxx
eldritch s. (GM): sister cities are a thing
Mac D.: what about cousin cities
eldritch s. (GM): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Twin_towns_and_sister_cities
Mobile L: Okay, it is here for now
Fingers crossed
Jaime: it's been 84 years
Gabby: frickin' FINALLY
Forrest: when was the last time i've seen the sun
Fawkes M.: So, wait, how many in-universe days has this roll lasted for?
Mac D.: i wanna say two or three
Narrator : It's a bright, crisp, clear, cold Saturday morning, and the clocks al
l strike nine.
well
there was a week
after the attack
Mobile L: i c wut u did ther
Narrator : and that was like
Mac D.: well for forrest anyway
Narrator : three days before, so plus seven, and then like four more
Forrest: .........................
Forrest grumbles and turns over in his bed
Jaime: Mrrgh...
Steph is already up by now, and getting breakfast
Jaime instinctively bops his alarm clock
Narrator : Jaime bops the clock, and notices his hand is moist.
rolling 1d20
(
16
)
= 16
Mac D.: from the SEEEEEMEN
Space: oh, god jaime
Mobile L: it fucking died again JESUS CHRIST
Space: clear ur browser cache mayb
Narrator : Thankfully, not his pants, though his hand had been so lovingly place
d in a bowl of warm water.
Mobile L: I will try. Y'all keep going, I really don't want this shit to happen
when I try to GM
Narrator : what is steph eating
Mac D.: if all else fails restart the computer
Jaime: ...Huh.
I'm getting good at this...
Narrator : Steph's grandfather is out for his morning jog.

Forrest is trying to go back to sleep
Jaime goes to get up, stretching
Space: corn flakes + a grapefruit
Narrator : bitch
Steph: it's healthy
Forrest: bitch
Narrator : The eye that had been carved into Jaime's wall still remains.
remember
the dream
Space: i do
Narrator : Forrest is resting in his cave, when...
Lel Shitkid: Big bro!
Jaime: ...
Forrest: ........
Jaime is glad that none of his family has asked questions about it yet
Forrest makes some sort of vocal utterance before peeking out from under the cov
ers
Lel Shitkid is beaming at him
Steph takes a moment to enjoy her morning, having the house to herself, and a go
od, healthy breakfast
Forrest: .....
Lel Shitkid: Hi!
Forrest yawns and rubs his eyes
Forrest: ...Hey, Sooz....
Narrator : Jaime hears the sound of his father's car pulling out of the driveway
.
Steph's demense recieves a knock at the door
Steph: Oh-- just a second!
Steph goes to get the door
Jaime: He usually isn't here this early on the weekend...
Narrator : out of
not into
Fawkes M.: Riiight
Mobile L: Fuck it, I am restarting. Buhhhhh, muhfuckin' shitlord thing
Fawkes M.: Don't die
Narrator : kill her
Space: pray for mob
Mobile L: Pray 4 me
Jaime breathes a sigh of relief
Lel Shitkid: It's saturday!
Jaime tries to think to himself where the heck he can find a poster to cover up
that damn eye
Forrest: ...Sure is.
Sherwood Cotter stands at her door, flanked by smiling yes-men and women
Forrest sits up
Steph: Oh. Good morning.
Jaime:
Normal Mind Test

"11 "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Fawkes M.: Gonna admit that I miss 0.9
Mac D.: this scat fetish poster will do just fine
Space: oh
Narrator : Jaime gets lost, staring into the Eye.
And he knows that it stares back.
Jaime: ...
Jaime goes to break off eye contact
Mac D.: it starts playing the Kill Your Family show
Narrator : He looks away.
And quickly pulls a Frame of Gnomes poster over it.
Out of sight, out of mind.
Jaime: ...That works. I don't think my father cares about my interests at all.
Mobile L: wow it just like
Lel Shitkid: I know all of the days!
Mobile L: Started up sans map
Lel Shitkid: wow
hold on
Mobile L: :c
Fawkes M.: What the heck
Mobile L: No map there
Cannot see tokens
Lel Shitkid: son of a bitch
Mobile L: Let me see if there's any help literature on this shit
Mac D.: do you use more than one browser
Jaime goes to shower, get dressed, the works
Mac D.: try it on another browser
Sherwood Cotter: You are aware, yes, of the impending election?
Forrest: Betcha can't say him in backwards order, can you?
*them
Steph: Yessir, yes I am.
Steph looks at the yes-man squad for a second, then back to Cotter
Sherwood Cotter: May I ask if anyone else is home?
(
13
)
= 13
Jaime manages to avoid the various traps Terry set for his amusement
Steph: Not right now, sorry.
Do you want me toooo... take a message? Or something?
Jaime: ...Phew.
Jaime wonders if Terry has a future in plumbing, as he goes to check the kitchen
for today's breakfast
Lel Shitkid: Sunday, tu- saturday, friday, thursday, wednesday, tuesday, monday!
Sherwood Cotter: If only you would be so kind.
(
17
)
= 17
Steph: Okay, hold on just a...

Steph goes to snatch up a pencil and notepad
Narrator : Ah, it seems like Johann actually made breakfast today, rather than l
eaving takeout money or what have you.
It's Jaime's favorite.
Lel Shitkid: duff
Forrest: Dang, you got me.....
Jaime yes, sourdough french toast
Forrest: Pretty good, Sooz.
Sherwood Cotter: fuck you bitch
Ah, there is no need!
Sherwood Cotter pulls out some pamphlets
Sherwood Cotter hands them to her
Steph: Oh.
Steph takes them
Sherwood Cotter: These should say what I have to say far better than I could.
I do wish you a pleasant day- ciao, as they say in Italy.
Steph: Yeah, hasta la pasta.
Lel Shitkid: Have you learned anything?
Steph closes the door
Steph and looks through the pamphlets
Narrator : Terry has already made his daring escape with the french toast.
Fast little shit.
Forrest: Oh, I've learned a ton.
I gotta follow up on what I've learned now, though, so I'm gonna be kinda busy.
Jaime thinks "hey, i'm still ahead 2-1 for today"
Jaime tries to see just wtf is left
Narrator : "What is this country?"
"What is our dear homeland?"
"A nation built on true morals, true justice, and true faith."
"These things are what the Conservative Party of Canada represent."
"Born in an impoverished Anglophone Montreal family, Sherwood Cotter fought for
what he believed in at every step, and has been party to the major events histor
ically and currently influencing the Belmont riding of British Columbia."
Steph: The 'major events,' huh.
Narrator : "Since arriving in Belmont, he has been party to many political situa
tions, and has held his position for three terms. Unlike his opponents, such as
the Liberal John Ruddman, or the NDP Jerry Null, Mr. Cotter understands the valu
e of a dollar, he understands the value of a man, and he understand the value of
principle in the political process."
Jaime has been left with a slice with a large bite deliberately taken out of it.
Lel Shitkid: ... Okay...
Lel Shitkid walks out, dejected
Jaime: ...
Jaime tries to see how much will be left after the bitten part is torn off
Forrest: ........................................
Forrest gets out of bed and pokes his head out
Lel Shitkid: rolling 1d20
(
12
)
= 12
Forrest: ...How about breakfast, first?
Steph: Well... I guess I'll just leave this somewhere.
Lel Shitkid: 60%
Lel Shitkid stops
Jaime: ...It'll have to do.
Lel Shitkid: I want cereal!
Steph tosses it into the trash
Steph: Oh, whoops.
Forrest: Cereal it is, then.
Narrator : what an asshole
Forrest heads INTO THE KITCHEN with her
Space: mobile's been gone for some amount of time
Jaime goes to cut off the parts with the bite marks, then proceeds to eat the no
n-contaminated part
Fawkes M.: Worrisome
Narrator : yeah hig is talking to her she said continue without her
also shit i forget what tabitha said she was looking into for the party
Space: aw hok
Narrator : Delicious, delicious sourdough fucking french toast.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yVlVecBeLig
Space: i can feel it
Jaime can feel it
Forrest opens the pantry and goes to scope that fuckin cereal
Lel Shitkid ambles into the kitchen
Steph finishes up her breakfast, trying to figure out what she ought to do today
Narrator : Jaime finishes his food.
Forrest finds...
Oatmeal Crisp.
and Steph will have to decide her own destiny.
Forrest: .......
....You like Oatmeal Crisp?
Steph: Hm...
Steph gets out her phone and texts Jaime
Steph: 'Gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
oooooooooooooood morning'
Lel Shitkid: I like Oatmeal Crisp!
Jaime was tossing his plate into the sink when the text comes his way
Forrest: Oh, good, phew......
Forrest time to pour some bowls of fuckin OAT MEAL CRISP
Jaime has to pull out the phone with his left hand cause his right hand hasn't b
een washed yet
Jaime: 'Hey'
Lel Shitkid: of the semen
Jaime: god
Lel Shitkid goes to town
Jaime: DAMMIT dad
Forrest eats at his own pace
Lel Shitkid: shitkid is small
it's cute
Steph: 'Just got approached by Der Politiker (german for the politician)'
Lel Shitkid finishes
Lel Shitkid: I win!
Jaime: 'What'd he say to you?'
Steph: 'Asked if anybody was home + gave pamphlet'
Narrator : she didn't read the whole pamphlet
Fawkes M.: Just so I'm not an idiot
Forrest: Ahhh, man.
Fawkes M.: Exactly what position is this guy being elected to?
Forrest: I guess I'm just a slow eater in the morning....
Forrest finishes off his bowl
Narrator : MP, short for Member of Parliament.
basically for every
100,000 people
there's a riding
they elect mps
and they go to parliament to vote on shit for their party, etc etc
Narrator : and they elect the prime minister, as well
based on party lines
Jaime: 'I didn't know mps went from door to door'
'he's an mp, right?'
Steph: 'That's his dream, I assume'
Narrator : no
he's the incumbent
Steph fishes the pamphlet out of the trash and looks at the other half
Forrest: Alright, I gotta go take care of some things. You go and watch some TV,
okay?
Space: shite
Jaime: 'How many pamphlets do you think he carries around?'
Lel Shitkid heads to the Television
Steph: 'I'm sure he has plenty in his car or truck or segway, etc'
'Had a bunch of cronies with him too'
Forrest gets up from his table and heads back up to his room
Forrest quickly reviews his notes, before pulling out his phone and dialing THE
PSYCHOLOGIST
Narrator : ah, yes
dr graham, no
?
Jaime: 'That makes sense for politicians'
Forrest yeah that one
Dr. Graham picks up
Space: what's the Rest of the pamphlet say
Dr. Graham: Yes, ah, hello?
Forrest: Dr. Graham. It's me, Forrest.

Narrator : no that was the whole pamphlet
Jaime: 'Wait, which one was he again?'
Narrator : she just missed a key detail
Space: what's the key detail
Dr. Graham: Ah- hello.
Narrator : if you want me to tell you you're going to roll for it
Space: i will but holy shit i need to show you something
Forrest: ....I wanted to discuss a recent matter with you that's come to my atte
ntion.
Steph: ...
Dr. Graham: sow me space
What is it?
Steph makes a thinking face, then gets back to texting Jaime
Space: http://i.snag.gy/njt1F.jpg
Fawkes M.: Jesus
Dr. Graham: good
god
Forrest: You're a psychologist, correct.
Dr. Graham: I am, yes.
Steph: 'Sherwood Cotter, conservative'
'Running against'
'Jerry Null, NDP'
'and John Ruddman, liberal'
Forrest: Do you have any sort of familiarity with the faculty at the high school
.
Dr. Graham: Other than Dr. Hall, no.
Forrest: ....I see.
..There's a history teacher there, Ms. Lao.
Jaime: 'Right, thanks'
Dr. Graham: I see.
Jaime: 'I think my dad's gonna vote for him, not sure'
Forrest: I'm a new student, but I've been told that she's recently gone through
a massive shift in personality, and hasn't been at school recently.
Steph: 'No Jaime we have more pressing concerns right now'
'Ruddman's running for office'
Forrest: I've found her at the local library for two days in a row now, and have
spoken with her.
Steph sets the pamphlets out on the counter, where Grandkarloman is sure to see
them
Fawkes M.: Shit, I think that whole Ruddman biz was the time where I was absent
eldritch s. (GM): no ruddman was
the man
Space: remember when jaime almost got hit by the car
eldritch s. (GM): in the car,
Fawkes M.: Right!
Forrest: She looks to be depressed. Extremely so. And she's informed me that she
's experiencing symptoms associated with pregnancy.
Fawkes M.: Now I remember
Jaime: 'Wait'
'Seriously?'
Dr. Graham nervously clears his throat
Forrest: ...
Dr. Graham: ... Have you reported this to the police?
Steph: 'Seriously + legitimately, this is what the pamphlet says'
Forrest: No. There's nothing conclusive about what I've found so far.
I had hoped that, as a psychologist, she was seeing you.
Jaime: 'So what can we do?'

'Vote against him?'
Dr. Graham: No, she hasn't been.
Forrest: I see.
Narrator : they're not voting age yet
Forrest: I'll need to speak with someone who knows her.
Narrator : elections are on the 19th
Jaime: he knows
that was sarcasm
Steph: 'I'm not old enough to vote yet'
Dr. Graham: I see.
Jaime: 'Neither am I'
Forrest: Sorry to bother you. Have a nice weekend.
Steph: 'So we can't vote against him'
Jaime: 'I guess we should show support for Cotter?'
Forrest hangs up the phone and thinks
Jaime: 'I dunno'
Dr. Graham: You tForrest can't leave Sooz alone until Dad wakes up.......Gotta find SOMEONE with
connections......
Steph: 'No love 4 the NDP?'
Jaime: 'I know null about null'
Forrest: ....
Jaime: 'And if dad's gonna vote for Cotter then dividing votes won't be good'
Forrest well worth a shot
Forrest LET'S TEXT STEPH
Forrest puncha puncha punch those keys
Steph: 'NDP > Conservative'
Forrest: 'I need to ask you something.'
Steph: 'Hi good morning to you too'
Forrest: 'Yeah Hi. What was the last thing you remember of Ms. Lao before she su
ddenly changed.'
Jaime: 'Both are better than Ruddman, though'
Space: whats the last thing she remembers of the lao b4 she changed seer
Steph to jaime
Steph: 'To be sure'
Jaime: 'Which one do people support more?'
'Out of the three'
Mac D.: so is steph just gonna gloss over the whole 'i witnessed a demon horribl
y murder a man last night' thing
Dr. Graham: she met her at the groecery store before the school year startd and
she was super giddy
Space: when was the murder
Mac D.: remember when iblis "killed" the madman
Space: ah yes
Mac D.: suddenly she remembers and just texts him "JAIME HOLY FUCK"
Space FORREST
Fawkes M.: Was I active during that sesh?
Dr. Graham: no
Steph: 'I ran into her at the grocery last summer. She was really like excitable
, like normal'
Steph Jaime
Forrest: 'I see. Did you talk with her.'

Dr. Graham: yes
Steph: 'There's a liberal majority last i checked'
Steph Forrest
eldritch s. (GM): space
this is
before
that election
this was during the harper days
Space: oh wow really?
this started before the election
Space: holy shit
were the conservatives in charge then
and they had a majority
Steph: '*conservative majority'
eldritch s. (GM): the polls were evenly split between them, the ndp, and the lib
erals
everyone hated harper
Steph: 'Yeah I talked with her'
'Sorry I'm talking to Jaime right now'
Forrest: 'How much of the conversation do you remember.'
Steph: 'Texting with Jaime'
'You know'
eldritch s. (GM): she talked about how fun it is at the gulf islands
Steph: 'She was talking about the gulf islands'
'Have you ever been there?'
Forrest: 'Was there anyone with her at the time.'
'No.'
Jaime: 'Hope that means Ruddman's gonna be out voted'
eldritch s. (GM): https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gulf_Islands
Steph: 'It's a vacationnplace'
'*vacation'
Steph Jaime
Fawkes M.: Forrest puts periods at the end of his texts?
Mac D.: yup
Fawkes M.: Why
Steph: 'I do too, could you come over to my house'
Fawkes M.: Extra effort
Mac D.: if you're going to SPEAK to another person you put in the EFFORT to be P
UNCTUAL
Jaime: 'Ok'
Steph Forrest
Jaime: 'See you in a bit'
Space: was there anyone w/ ms lao
Jaime goes to finally wash that hand of his, before heading the frick out
Steph: 'Maybe if they were invisible'
Narrator : he cleans his hand off
Forrest: 'Is that a no.'
Steph: 'Or hiding on the ceiling Splinter Cell style'
Fawkes M.: He cleans his hand
Off
Steph: 'I've got it, it must have been Sam Fisher there'
"Haha'
Forrest: 'Okay whatever.'

Fawkes M.: It's now that I'm remembering how much I dislike map navigation when
I'm only armed with a trackpad
Forrest: 'Do you know anyone Ms. Lao is personally associated with. Friends, fac
ulty she'd talk to a lot, anything like that.'
Space: do she kno
Narrator : like the ladies of the faculty are all pretty close
Steph: 'The other teachers I guess?'
Jaime steppin on the street, BROO BOO BOO
Narrator : Jaime is a streetwalker.
Forrest: 'Okay. Thanks.'
Space: jaime stops off at elegance shop Otafukuya
Steph: 'Yeah btw are you busy today'
Forrest: 'I could be. Why.'
Jaime does he make it unimpeded
Narrator : where is he headed
Steph: 'I'm having a sickass houseparty w/ me + jaime, where we will discuss imp
ortant things that u should know'
Fawkes M.: The home of one Steph
Narrator : he does
bump into
Forrest: .....
Narrator : someone
Forrest exhales
Forrest: 'When are you having it.'
Anton bumps into him, falls, and drops his shit
Anton: Oh!
Steph: 'Come hither Ser Forrest of Jersey'
Forrest: .......
Jaime takes a step back, but doesn't fall
Forrest annoyed expression
Forrest pockets his phone and heads for the door
Jaime: ...Hey, Anton.
Forrest: I'm heading out, Suzy. Be good until Dad wakes up,
Steph: (...Ser Forrest of Jersey...)
Steph chuckles at her own joke
Mac D.: someone needs to slap that girl
Space: silent hill has good music
eldritch s. (GM): i hate
people
who
make remixes
and then don't label them as such
Fawkes M.: This is why you sample your tracks before adding them
Standard procedure
eldritch s. (GM): i did
and it was good up until a certain point
Space: so is it canon that steph is ken's next door neighbor
Space: good
Steph goes to check if Ken's home

Anton: Ech- eh, hello!
Forrest smiles at her, before turning and heading out, his face returning to the
Forrest Standard
Anton: Is very sorry for bumping...
Forrest ONWARD TO STEPH'S FILTHY HOLE
(
14
)
= 14
Ken answers the door
Jaime: It's fine. Tends to happen when you round corners.
Ken: Oh, hello, Stephanie.
Jaime tries to glance at how much shit of Anton's is on the floor
Narrator : All of it.
Jaime but how much is all of it
Narrator : Forrest walks by a construction site.
Steph: Hey, good morning! Uh, do you have a minute? Or -- more than a minute, mo
st likely.
Forrest eyes the site as he walks past it
Narrator : All of the workers are out to lunch.
Except one man.
Forrest: ...?
Narrator : Some skinny, milquetoast looking fucker
Fawkes M.: Hey
Forrest: ....
Narrator : Who is toiling away.
Fawkes M.: He finally ended something with a question mark
Forrest did he already finish his lunch?....
Forrest: ...Excuse me.
Ken: Certainly, come in
Ken gestures
Fawkes M.: What I'm wondering is if Anton's dropped stuff is like a lot of stuff
Or just like one piece of paper
Narrator : it's like
a few books
and a binder
Steph steps in
Steph: How's your day going so far?
Jaime: I need to be somewhere, so - do you need any help?
Anton: No, no- I will be fine.
Anton is scooping up his Hungarian books
Jaime: Alright. Seeya.
Anton nods
Jaime goes on his way
Gordon Knotts looks up from his work
Gordon Knotts: Yes, what is it...?
Forrest: I couldn't help but notice you were the only one here.
Ken: Well, it has only just begun.
But so far it is looking up.
Narrator : Jaime is walking to Steph's house, when
Fawkes M.: As a headsup - 10:15 is my upper limit for tonight
Steph: That's good to hear... I was getting a few other people to talk stuff ove
r with. About, uh... y'know. There's been some developments.
Ms. Lao: kk
...
Jaime: ...
Morning, Ms. Lao.
Fawkes M.: she lives
Ms. Lao just stands there
Ms. Lao: ... Hello.
Mobile L: Estoy
Space: MOOOBile
Mobile L: Now let's see if the map holds up on Safari
Gordon Knotts: Oh, no, the rest are just taking a break.
Space: P r Ay
Mobile L: Not gonna be super long, but I intend to wring every last drop outta t
his
Jaime: How are you doing? Just wondering.
Forrest: Why aren't you on break.
Ken: it is saturday morning gabby
Ken sits down in a chair
Ken: Yes?
Steph: Well, uh... (ah, crap, I left the freakin'...)
Gabby is being a GOOD YOUNG LADY and finishing up some fricking homework before
she goes out on the town or anything, all while enjoying a breakfast pho
Fawkes M.: Everything she eats is pho
Steph: Uh, you know John Ruddman?
Ms. Lao: ...
I... am fine.
Space: pho real
Fawkes M.: Pho sure
Gabby: hey, untrue, sometimes i eat spring rolls, or your frickin' western foods
Fawkes M.: That's actually the name of a pho restaurant I once went to
Gordon Knotts: Oh, I just didn't feel like going on break.
Gabby: B) B) B)
...Mmmmkay, that looks GOOD.
Forrest: I see....
Gordon Knotts: it pans out
Forrest: Alright, then. Sorry to waste your time.
Gordon Knotts: she drew dickbutt
Gabby: ...What even to do on a Saturday morning...? Frrrrrrick...
Gabby texts Steph

Ms. Lao: ...
Ken: Yes, I do.
Gabby: "HI GOOD MORNING HOPE I'M NOT WAKING YOU UP AND CRAP"
Fawkes M.: Shit, I missed Lao
Steph: Yeah, he's -Oh, sorry.
Steph quickly texts back
Gordon Knotts: Oh, you didn't waste any time.
Steph: 'at ken's house hi'

Jaime: That's good. I, ah, I need to be on my way.
Gordon Knotts: Don't think anything about it.
Gabby: !
Forrest: ....
Forrest looks out towards the site
Forrest: ...What's being built here.
Steph: He's running for MP on the, uh, the liberal ticket.
Gordon Knotts smiles
Gabby ohhhhh FRICK i wonder if... IIIII could be there...?
Gabby:
Gordon Knotts: To be honest, I'm not really sure.
Gabby: "COOL. WHAT'RE YOU DOING THERE"
Forrest: Really. I'd assume they would tell the construction crew what is it the
y're building.
Gabby has always allcapsed ever since she was a tiny child and ain't about to ch
ange course now
Steph quickly texts once more
Ms. Lao: ... Goodbye.
Steph: 'Discussing important stuff, tell Jaime + Forrest to come also'
Gordon Knotts: Oh, they did.
I just forgot.
Steph: Sorry, that was Gabby. She's on her way too.
Ken: ... Hm.
Oh, good.
Gabby: "OKAY COOL. IT'S OKAY WITH KEN? WHATS HIS ADDRESS"
Ken stands up
Jaime nods, then continues on
Ken heads into the kitchen
Steph: ...Oh-Forrest: ........I see.
Steph quickly texts the address
Forrest: So what exactly are you working on when everyone is on break, then.
Steph: Uh... you don't mind if her and Forrest and Jaime come over for a bit?
Narrator : He makes it to Steph's home.
Gordon Knotts: That wall needs finishing.
Gabby: "OKAY THANKS SEE YOU GUY'S"
Jaime knocks on Steph's door, not having checked for any memos that it's at Ken'
s house
Gabby , despite being a child prodigy, typos pretty hard sometimes
Ken: No, it's fine!
Forrest: ....Alright then. I'll let you get back to it.
Ken returns, with a pot of tea
Forrest: Have a nice day.
Gabby starts to text Forrest and Jaime GROUPWAYS..........
Steph: Good, good...
Forrest continues his way to Steph's home WHEN

Gordon Knotts: You too.
Gordon Knotts returns to his labour
Gabby: "HEY GUYS ITS GABBY IMPORTANT MEETING @ KEN'S HOUSE PLEASE COME THERE THA
NKS"
Forrest: ......
Jaime knock knock knock - oh, gabbytext
Forrest looks at his phone
Gabby: ...Did I miss an apostrophe there...?
Jaime: ...Of course.
Gabby: ...Nahhhhh!
Forrest oh so GABBY wants a meeting now
Space: THANK'S
Gabby HEADS to Ken's house
Forrest well GREAT which one is he supposed to fuckin attend now
Fawkes M.: Should Jaime know that Steph and Ken are neighbors?
Gabby briskly walkin' in her usual semi-formal school uniform even though the sc
hool does not have a uniform policy
Forrest: ....
Space: he probs would i would think
Narrator : sure
Forrest decides to text gabby
Narrator : Forrest feels.
Eyes.
Fat eyes.
Looking at him.
Jaime heads over to Ken's house, then rings the doorbell
Space: a meeting
Forrest is in the middle of a text when he stops, feeling the FAT EYES
Space: of the fats
Forrest he knows those eyes well, having a pair of his own
Forrest: .........
Forrest looks in the direction of the Fat
Fawkes M.: It was at that moment that the Earth was knocked out of orbit
Gabby hums a little ditty to herself as she walks
Ken goes to answer the door
Gabby: see you drivin' 'round town with the boy I love, and I'm likeKen: Have a seat, I made tea.
Gabby: frick youuuuuuuuu~
Forrest: ....
Narrator : They lock eyes for a moment.
Steph has acquired herself some tea by this point
Narrator : And Forrest
Steph does a wave to Jaime
Forrest: .....
Narrator : Feels a deep connection to this man.
Forrest: ..........
Jaime: Hey, there. Alright...
Jaime steps in, giving a wave back to Steph
Mr. Mu: In the dark, both of your eyes are lights, searching for the truth!
You know this man, for in a sense, he is you, and you are him!
You are both of the Sage Archetype!
Space: social liiiiiink
Fawkes M.: He's a Greek Chorus
Forrest: (....Oh, for a second there, I thought you were making a dig at my fat.
)
Fawkes M.: So are all Sages fat?
Forrest: .........
Forrest burns this man's face into his MEMORY
Narrator : Gabby sees Anton, carrying a bunch of Hungarian books.
Roger Perkins: ...
Roger Perkins nods
Forrest nods
Roger Perkins turns and heads on his way
Forrest: .......
Forrest looks back at his phone
Ken sits down
Forrest: 'I can't come to your meeting, Gabby. Steph's already invited me to one
at her house.'
Ken: ...
This is all very odd, isn't it.
Steph: All this Junior Detective stuff?
Ken: No, beyond that, all of it.
Anton waves at Gabby
Anton: H-hello!
Jaime: What do you mean? Not just, like, the election?
Ken: mobile
curse you
Fawkes M.: Onore
Steph: The... uh, the magic stuff.
Ken: Yes.
Forrest continues his trek to Steph's house after making the text
Forrest: ....
Jaime: Right.
Steph: It really is a lot to take in.
Forrest knock knocks ON the door and stands there
Narrator : He gets past the people
Steph: I haven't... I guess I haven't really stopped to think about all of it.
Narrator : And knocks on the door of an empty house.
Forrest: ....................
Ronald Karling just walks up to the door
Forrest: ...?
Ronald Karling: Hello, son.
How can I help you?

Gabby: buh, sorry, got sidetracked a second
Forrest: Hello, sir. Are you Steph's guardian.
Ronald Karling: Oh, yes.
Gabby is about to text Forrest back when ANTON
Ronald Karling: My name is Ronald, Ronald Karling, good to meet you.
Gabby: ...Oh, uh... Hey. What's up?
Forrest: It
Jaime: It's felt like a long time, when it's only been, about... two weeks?
Anton: Oh- ech- nothing, really.
Forrest: *Nice to meet you too. I was invited over by Steph, she wanted to speak
to me.
Gabby just stopping herself from asking "why is your brother a fricklord"
Jaime: Know what I mean?
Anton: How about with yourself?
Steph nods
Ken nods
Ken: You are correct.
Life is going by at a crawl.
Steph: At least it's the weekend.
Ronald Karling: Let me open the door, then...
Ronald Karling opens it and heads in
Forrest nods and quietly follows in
Jaime: Yeah.
Ronald Karling takes off his boots
Space: i'm just quietly cackling at this
Forrest: Should I leave my shoes somewhere.
Ronald Karling: Yes, please.
Jaime: ...So, what're we gonna do today?
Forrest nods and removes his shoes, setting them by the door
Anton: gabby
Steph: Well, there's some stuff we need to talk about. Um... I already told you
both about Ruddman and the politics and stuff.
Forrest: Do you know where I can find her, sir.
Gabby: Not much, I don't guess. Just got done with homework and stuff.
Anton: Oh, what on?
Gabby: (father back from work, have like ten minutes maybe, shit is just not goi
ng my way at all this evening)
Math and history, mostly... Kinda stumped about that film thing.
Jaime: Yeah. Like, what do you think'll happen if he wins?
Ronald Karling: Stephanie should be in her r- On second thought, I'll get her my
self.
Forrest: ...
Ronald Karling heads to her room
Gabby: I'll cross that bridge when I, like... when I get there, I guess.
Forrest that was....odd
Mobile L: Man I don't wanna get salty
Forrest maybe he just didn't want him snooping around his house, it'd make sense
.
Steph: I don't know. But not anything good, I mean... y'know?

Mobile L: But this is just making me rather down. I thought I could do more, wit
hout shit repeatedly getting in my face
Space: http://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/archive/31198758/images/13963651642
75.jpg
Ken nods
Space: theres always some other time at least
sorry things worked out like they did
Jaime: I mean, he can't really bring the topic of Third Heaven to Parliament. Ca
n he?
Anton: Don't worry, I am sure it will be great!
it's nothing to be upset about
Mobile L: Guess so, and it's okay. Just that we haven't done this in forever and
now, like, roadblocks everywhere
Anton: vomit cake, that's something to be upset about
Steph: No, but there's other stuff he could do.
Mobile L: Agreed
Space: eternally grateful i was shaving for that video
Fawkes M.: I have all of next week off
Anton: on your birthday
i a in europe
Fawkes M.: We could try something accounting for Seer's new timezone
Anton: maybe
Jaime: Like what?
Space: god willing
Anton: we'll see how that goes
Roland Glass returns
Roland Glass: no
Ronald Karling returns
Forrest: ...
Ronald Karling: She's not home.
Gabby: Yeah, guess so... Uh... 'S your brother alright and stuff?
Fawkes M.: Roland
Ronald
Forrest: ......Oh.
Steph: Like, uh... like if he made it mandatory for the cops to be at school aft
er hours or something. Just as an example.
Forrest: .....She didn't inform me she was leaving, I'm sorry.
Ronald Karling: Don't worry about it.
That's life.
Forrest: I'll be on my way, then. Thank you for your time.
Ronald Karling: Stay safe.
I hear Harvest season's coming.
Forrest: ....?
Ronald Karling: Just an old phrase.
Forrest: ...Oh, I see.
Mobile L: Me on this, my 24th birthday http://24.media.tumblr.com/tumblr_mb04ojJ
gIH1r7cf6no3_500.gif
Ronald Karling: only with vomit cake
Jaime: That's... is that very liberal?
Steph a fantastic shrug
Mobile L: I arrange the vomit into a "24"
Forrest gets his shoes on and gets out there, doing some ANNOYED TEXTING
Forrest: 'You're not home.'
Gabby:
Steph: ...?
Steph texts back
Gabby while it is crossing her mind, texts
Anton smiles at her
Steph: 'Yeah didn't Gabby tell you? At Ken's house right next door'
Jaime: ...I don't know. I just want to make sure this isn't like the end of the
world if it isn't stopped.
Anton: Ah, he is...
Fine, healthy.
Gabby: "STEPH IS THE ONE WHO IS AT KEN'S ACTUALLY"
Forrest: .........
Steph: I mean, it's something important to keep in mind.
Forrest shifts into MAXIMUM ANNOYDRIVE
Steph: But... I dunno yet. There's another thing.
Ken listens thoughtfully
Forrest walks rrrrright over to the immediate house and knocks
Ken opens the door
Steph: The -- oh.
Jaime: What is it-Ken: Come in.
Jaime: ...
Forrest HES LOOKIN GROUCHY
Forrest: Thanks.
Forrest steps in
Steph: ...
Forrest: Where should I leave my shoes.
Gabby: That's, uhh... That's good, then. He's doing well and that's... 'S good w
hen that happens."
Steph awk-weeeeerd
Ken: On the mat should be fine.
Forrest: Right.
Leaves his shoes on the mat and walks over to THE GROUP
Anton: Yes...
Forrest: Alright, what did you want to tell me.
Jaime: ...
Steph: Uh... Ruddman's running for Liberal MP. That's -- that's like your Americ
an Democrats.
Forrest: .......Okay.
What does that have to do with me.
Gabby: ...Well, um... Give him my good vibes and stuff, I guess. Have a good one
, Anton.
Anton: Yes, you as well!
Steph: Well, he's the-- the boss of the conspiracy dudes. With the snake pins.
Gabby awkward smile and wave, KEEP WALK
Steph: But, uh, the thing that I was trying to say, um.
Jaime: He nearly hit me with a car.
Mobile L: And sadly this is where it must be called
Steph: Yeah, he almost did that.
Forrest: That I didn't know.

So he's running for elective office. Good to know.
Space: fare well mobile on this, your day of age
Mobile L: But y'all keep going. Assume Gab was there and stuff, probably
Space: u sure?
Mac D.: BE WELL, TEXAS GIRL
Fawkes M.: I said 10:15 was my upper limit
Sure enough, I have to fill out paperwork
Like a voter registration application, and shit for my housing at school next ye
ar
Space: take part in the democratic process - make sure ruddman doesn't enter off
ice
Fawkes M.: I'm gonna vote for Ruddman
Mobile L: Yeah, y'all can do whatever you need. Adios, good northern friends, an
d a happy St. Patrick's day to all
Space: fawkes no
Fawkes M.: And you can't deny me this right
Mobile
Space: gud nite
Fawkes M.: Happy birthday
And vote for Ruddman
Mobile L: Danke :) G'night, all
Fawkes M.: Night
(vote for ruddman)
Narrator : it's my saint day
alright i think that's enough
Fawkes M.: Isn't it a school night?
RL, not here
Space: yeah its thursday
Fawkes M.: Alright
eldritch s. (GM): i will be boarding the plane tomorrow in addition to going to
morning classes
Fawkes M.: Jesus
eldritch s. (GM): ugh, airport security
Fawkes M.: Just zone out
eldritch s. (GM): that's the worst part of the whole thing
Space: haha it's bad in canada too?
eldritch s. (GM): of course
a petulant, petty bureaucrat is the same no matter what country they're from
Fawkes M.: Which is why you should vote for Ruddman
eldritch s. (GM): https://teamup.com/ks11f3df36e95dd623/
Space: will we continue on with the Weekend next session
Space: multiple grades
Steph: sempais
immediately i distrust this one
maya!!
Space: seer i request one thing in terms of faceclaims
Space: i have dibs on yukino from persona 2
eldritch s. (GM): iss my ass
behold
Space: the other asian
eldritch s. (GM): excuse me
Space: gabby
and moon
the only asians in the entire city
eldritch s. (GM): lao
Space: fuck
that's right
eldritch s. (GM): and alfonse jiang
Space: what is The Dark Misstress's real name
eldritch s. (GM): wouldn't you like to know
jerry null
is that name familiar to you
Space: yes
it rings familiar
though i cannot for the life of me say where at this moment
eldritch s. (GM): he is the ndp candidate for the riding
Space: oh shit yeah him
eldritch s. (GM): alfonse jiang is
the prospective mp
for
the
rhino
party
Space: oh my god
we need to
get the rhino party in office
eldritch s. (GM): they've never won a seat before
Space: will we be able to join the Clubs
eldritch s. (GM): just the one
and yes
Space: that's good
eldritch s. (GM): look at the
fucking
nerds
give me your impression of these people
Space: it reminds me of that gunshow 'anime club' comic
minerva: 'the TERM, mark'
-pushes up glasses'is HENTAI'
eldritch s. (GM): as individuals
Space: i don't trust anyone who calls themsleves Papa Joe
moon is a misanthrope
eldritch s. (GM): she didn't give herself the title
Space: minerva is terrifying
eldritch s. (GM): people just call her papa joe
Space: why
eldritch s. (GM): it is a club injoke
Space: what does the occult club do
eldritch s. (GM): they used to be many clubs
but most of the people were grade 12
so when they left
the only way the school would let the clubs be around is if they became one gian
t club
Space: giant - 5 people
eldritch s. (GM): vs three clubs of two-one people
Space: soon this will be a 9-man club
eldritch s. (GM): also
there are
people in yoru class
presuably in the club
Space: the club grows
eldritch s. (GM): you ignored mark tomson
Space: and maria
i think that maria macarthur
well
i look at her
and i cannot think anything but 'maya'

eldritch s. (GM): you look at her
Space: maya is a good character
i think that mark tomson hides unspeakable sins behind his glasses
eldritch s. (GM): moon is korean
his family
is methodist
Space: is he
eldritch s. (GM): ask him
how about alfonse jiang and jerry null
Space: i'd probably vote for either of them
eldritch s. (GM): how about cotter or ruddman
Space: mmmmmmmmmmmmmi'd prefer not to vote for either of them
eldritch s. (GM): let's assume
you knew
nothing
about what was going on in ruddman's or cotter's personal lives
and only knew their parties and faces
who would you vote for
Space: then if it was between ruddman and cotter i'd go for ruddman because he s
eems capable and cotter seems slimy
eldritch s. (GM): what about null and jiang vs ruddman
list them in the order you would vote for them
Space: i swear i've heard this song before
eldritch s. (GM): yeah
it's from persona 3
Space: jiang
null
ruddman
cotter
eldritch s. (GM): you would vote for
the joke party
Space: yeah
eldritch s. (GM): a complete throwaway vote
Space: change can't happen if no one wants it
Alfonse Jiang: what do you think null and jiang are like personally
Space: i think null is a very
he looks serious
respectable
jiang seems like more of a pranklyman
Alfonse Jiang: he's ndp, which means he's a socialist
Space: i'd have a beer with him
i don't think null is the kind of guy to spraypaint stalin everywhere
Steph: im boxed in
what are you two doing
rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} + 1
{{(
9
+
14
+
13
)}}+1
= 14
fuckers won't find me...
Alfonse Jiang: does steph keep track of politics
Steph: i think she does yea
Alfonse Jiang: she is anti-weed
liberals want to decrminalize weed
Space: she does not Toe the Party Line
Alfonse Jiang: ndp and conservatives are like "no thanks"

rhinos promise to legalize all drugs
who does she vote for
Space: i feel she'd bounce between ndp and liberal depending on the candidate
Alfonse Jiang: what does she think of cotter
just think
if
she had never known
ruddman was in with the bad guy
she might ahve voted for him
Space: i feel that very likly
she doesn't like cotter very much
Alfonse Jiang: is she going to try to help him win the riding
Space: i'm not certain who she'd try helping yet
Alfonse Jiang: the reason
i made ruddman a libera
*liberal
is because this is the election
where the liberals
Space: win
Alfonse Jiang: absolutely dominated
and got a majority of seats
Steph: we fucked yo...
Alfonse Jiang: can steph stem the ride tide
*red
Steph: i... i'll do it
Steph stands dramatically at the roof of her home
Alfonse Jiang shoots her
Steph: fucking rhinos
Alfonse Jiang: It's just a brank, b0ss.
eldritch s. (GM): space
did you know
naomi
was in anime club
Steph: i kind of figured
eldritch s. (GM): she had
friends
Steph: and now she's fuckin dead
eldritch s. (GM): death ripples out
Steph: thanks to stephanie karloman
eldritch s. (GM): who knows how many lives you've affected
Space: that fuckin memorial ceremony is going to be something
eldritch s. (GM): the vigil
she's not known to be dead yet
Space: that's the worst part
eldritch s. (GM): false hope
One Who Corrupts All: Illusions...
One Who Brings Darkness: THESE THINGS...
One Who Laments : These wretched things...
One Who Devours : THESE ARE WHAT WE SEEK...
One Who Falls to Ruin: TO DESTROY!
Steph: ...ah shit
One Who Falls to Ruin: they're a gang
Space: there are 4 party members
and 5 bossgangmen
One Who Falls to Ruin: it is possible for
a sixth
to be encountered
Space: BonusBoss
One Who Falls to Ruin: yeah but unlike most bonus boss
it makes things
worse
Space: i have a deep burning curiosity and interest in this but i supose we shal
l find out
One Who Falls to Ruin: it doesn't get you the true ending, it just fucks things
up
Space: is it still possible to get the Goode Ending after that
One Who Falls to Ruin: es
Iblis: I think I'm going to vomit.
Steph: REACH OUT
TO THE
TRUTH
Iblis pukes
Iblis: i'm proud of this roll20
Space: honestly this is like
the roll20 i'm most hype for
Iblis: the pauses give me chances to just like
Space: id go so far as to say its my favorite
Iblis: add shit
Space: thats the upside to pauses
cypress wind changed like
absolutely radically
Iblis: radical
Space: yeah it is
do you want me to show you some stuff that i don't think will be in the final th
ing now?
Iblis: i always had the general structure of this one always set out
sure just let me
finish playing songs
Space: ok i gotta move myself to my room
ominous af
BASAKA
eldritch s. (GM): this is a boss theme, as you may have guessed
Space: ye
eldritch s. (GM): when faced with the first
serious
boss
what do you think steph would do
that is about how big one who brings darkness is
Space: i think
her first reflex would be to fucking run
One Who Brings Darkness stomps after
Steph: 'i don't have to outrun the One Who Brings Darkness'
'i just have to outrun the rest of the party
{{(
6
+
19
+
12
)}}+1
= 13
One Who Brings Darkness:
Normal Brawn Test
" "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Steph: horse
shit
One Who Brings Darkness: you know in
persona 3
the reaper
this serves as something similar
Space: don't dawdle
One Who Brings Darkness: alright take me to cypress and thn we'll rabbit
i'm scary
Victor Sherrings: I think I smell... human feces,,,
Tom Jones: YOU SMELL NOTHING.
Normal Spirit Test
"not an hero "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Normal Brawn Test
"an hero "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
rolling 1d20
(
2
)
= 2
Space: i'll go find a new battery for my mouse bfore we start
Fawkes M.: Look
It's number 2
Space: i'll finally
FINALLy
get a chance to make those macros i made MONTHS ago
{{(
18
+
7
+
15
)}}+0
= 15
*it even 3d rolls the dice for me! c:
eldritch s. (GM): look
duff isn't here
what a piece of shit
Fawkes M.: Give us the macro, Space
It's so much prettier
Space: make it yourself you lazy son of a dick
eldritch s. (GM): make it in your dick you son of a dick
Space: i did
Fawkes M.: rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1}
{{(
1
+
9
+
18
)}}
= 9
Mac D.: HARRO, EVERYNYAN
eldritch s. (GM): we're starting without the woman
Fawkes M.: rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} + 1
{{(
7
+
10
+
11
)}}+1
= 11
{{(
18
+
9
+
20
)}}+1
= 19
{{(
7
+
12
+
2
)}}
= 7
rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} - 1
{{(
6
+
8
+
17
)}}-1
= 7
Space: you can type /talktomyself
so you dont fill up the chatlog
Fawkes M.: Don't tempt me not to
eldritch s. (GM): stop spamming fucking rolls
Space: ok so are we gonna continue from where we left off or N
Fawkes M.: That depends
Was Gabby mid-sentence when we ended?
Space: no
Mac D.: we COULD timeskip
Fawkes M.: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ussCHoQttyQ
Space: i think that might be better if only because going on from here would be
awkward
Forrest: I'm not becoming a political stooge, Steph.
What are you going to do, run for office yourself...........................
eldritch s. (GM): i learned
te truth
gabby
was walking
here
Steph: yeah w/ anton
eldritch s. (GM): why are you
obsessed
with time skipping
no she left him in the dust
Mac D.: gabby can walk?
Steph: timeskips give duff boners
eldritch s. (GM): no space
you are the one pushing it
answer for yourself
Mac D.: nice try, Flipflops McGee
Steph: hes the one who suggested it i'm just thinking about it
Mac D.: no cowering away to the other side THIS time
Fawkes M.: I recall audibly hearing Duff's boner the last time we skipped to the
next morning
Space: whatever we're doin can we do it instead of discussing what to do untill
the exact point in time mobile gets here
Mac D.: look at him
eldritch s. (GM): the baby is angry
Mac D.: tryin to skirt away from the topic
Space: god damn you i came here to roll dice and pretend to be canadian
Fawkes M.: Seriously, guys
What was the topic of discussion at the end of last sesh?
Mac D.: Decision 2015
Fawkes M.: I don't want to check because chatlogs terrify me ever since Still Ni
ght
Space: steph said that john ruddman was running for political office
Fawkes M.: Ah, right
eldritch s. (GM): i mean where would you have me skip to
and how would we conclude the discussion went
silence
Space: i was putting away laundry
eldritch s. (GM): i'll put you away
Space: i have no idea duff suggested it and i thought it'd be awkward to pick ba
ck up where we left off, since it'd been so long
eldritch s. (GM): can someone here make a meaningful contribution
Mac D.: space smells
Space: duff is ugly
eldritch s. (GM): also no space you were the one who brought up the idea of not
starting off where we stopped
do not move this onto duff
Mac D.: i'm the victim
Fawkes M.: I think we should just do something like, pick up the general topic o
f conversation without just going off from the last line
eldritch s. (GM): look at his
innocent face
Space: Mac D.: we COULD timeskip
Mac D.: c:
Space: i didn't suggest shit, i just wanted to no for clarification since everyt
hing was taking so long
*know
eldritch s. (GM): Space: ok so are we gonna continue from where we left off or N
Fawkes M.: That depends
Was Gabby mid-sentence when we ended?
Space: no
Mac D.: we COULD timeskip
Space: i literally just said
Mac D.: Space: i think that might be better if only because going on from here w
ould be awkward
go to jail
Narrator : We're starting from the general topic of conversation that we were on
last time- Everyone knows Ruddman is running for office-- go.
Forrest: What do you suggest we do about that.
Jaime: I don't know - however you stop a politician, I guess?
Steph: I mean... we can't vote. We can campaign and things like that, but it's n
ot as though we can exactly influence things directly.
Forrest: What do you mean "campaign."
Do you suggest we take to the streets holding signs.
"John Ruddman leads a Snake Cult."
Steph: C'mon, doesn't every political campaign need volunteers?
Forrest: ....
Jaime: ...Wait. I had an idea.
Forrest: ...Are you implying weForrest looks at Jaime
Steph: What is it?
Jaime: If we run into him again, maybe we could get him on camera?
Assuming he tries anything like running over me again.
Forrest: Did he seriously try to run over you on purpose.
Steph: I'm not really sure if we're gonna run into him in... uh, that way, again
. He's shifty.
Jaime: ...Probably.
Forrest: ....Yeah, that'sForrest is disregarded
Forrest: ....
Space: fat fuck
Forrest forrestface.jpg
Fawkes M.: I meant to aim that to Forrest before turning to the Steph
These FG customs will be the end of me
Narrator : look at his eyeholes
Ken: ...
Forrest: .....I
Ken sits, with a slight frown on his face
Forrest: *I'm not going to play stooge for a different politician.
That would be bringing my outside agenda into this election. It spits in the eye
of democracy.
Jaime: Is democracy really like that in America?
Forrest: If you intend to get me to play the political game, I'm going to play i
t legit.
Steph: Just go with the candidate you actually agree with then. No offense, but
you really don't seem like you'd vote Liberal, so there's no trouble there.
Forrest: And that means digging up humiliating dirt on Ruddman and selling it of
f anonymously.
Steph: ...Fuck, you'd probably like the Rhino Party, huh...?
Forrest: I don't vote. The electoral system is broken.
Ken: ...
Narrator : Suddenly, the television shows an AD...
Jaime: ...Is that really-Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks at the telly
Alfonse Jiang: Hello!
I'm Alfonse f*cking Jiang!
Jaime: .....
Alfonse Jiang: Do you think the electoral system is broken?
Forrest: ....
Alfonse Jiang: Do you hate the government?
Steph has the most self-satisfied, knowing smile right now
Alfonse Jiang: Do you like orgasms and drugs?
Forrest: ....
Alfonse Jiang: Well- that's what we here, at the Rhino Party, have to offer youyou disgusting sacks of sh*t!
We may contempt the electorate, but we do so openly!
Forrest: .....
Alfonse Jiang: So- this election, please- vote for me.
F*ck you.
Goodnight New England!
Steph: That is your thing. That is so your thing.
Forrest: ...
Forrest looks back at the others
Forrest: Okay, so as I was saying: Dirt.
Jaime: ...Yeah? Dirt?
Alfonse Jiang: ...
I'm still on, *ssholes!
Steph: That stuff about the Board of Health is what immediately comes to mind. W
e sh-- *Gah!8
Alfonse Jiang: Nyahahahaha!
Alfonse Jiang 's ad ends
Forrest: ....
Steph: ...Fucker.
Ken: ...
Steph: But yeah, we should look into that stuff.
Forrest: .....We find stuff incriminating Ruddman, and we get it out there.
The electoral process will do the rest.
Jaime: Wait - remind me about the Board of Health.
Forrest: It doesn't even have to be criminal, it could possibly be anything.
The petty masses will do their work.
Since I'm out of the loop- what things in this town are considered socially frow
ned-upon.
Steph: Well, uh... for instance, Dr. Hall. He's on the Board of Health, but he's
not supposed to be able to be on the Board of Health, 'cause he's a practicing
physician.
Jaime: ...Right. So - Ruddman doesn't really mind that?
Forrest: Right, there's that.
Steph: Ruddman's pulling strings. There's got to be more we just don't know abou
t yet.
Jaime: ...Can we really be sure about that?
Forrest: I should be able to use my methods to get that information out to the p
ublic quickly.
Steph: Okay, it's something to go off, regardless if we're sure or not. Forrest,
uh, I'll leave you to that.
Forrest 's eyes gleam
Steph: Uh, let's see...
Jaime: ...
Steph: Ken, do you have any ideas?
Forrest this is his element....
Ken: Ruddman...
What is that he does again?
He's some sort of businessman- they're likely to have hidden business...

Forrest: That's true.
Steph: Who does he work for? Like, specifically, do we know?
Forrest: If we can gain access to ledgers......
Ken: I'm sure we could find out.
Jaime: ...Does he have a Linkedin? We can check that.
Steph: Oh, shit, good idea. Let's check.
Steph goes on her phone, to 'LinkedIn'
Forrest: ......
Forrest googles "John Ruddman"
Steph searches for 'John Ruddman Belmont BC'
Narrator : Ah- paydirt1
Jaime pulls out his own phone and googles "john ruddman job"
Narrator : John Ruddman is the CEO of his own logging company.
NewPath Logging
Jaime: ...
Narrator : He is apparently quite successful and well connected.
Jaime googles "newpath logging safety", counting on his autocorrect to fix whate
ver dyslexic words he types
Forrest: ...A logging company?
Narrator : And has diversified his business, which he bought with inherited mone
y, into oil and mning, which are big jobs around these parts.
Forrest: He must be my dad's mortal enemy.
Narrator : NewPath has a great safety record under Ruddman, in fact.
NewPath has been generally seen as sensible about its logging, doing green thing
s like reforestation intitiatives.
And has made numerous donations to the municipal government of Belmont.
Forrest: ....
....This is going to be difficult.
Space: srry had 2 laundry again
Jaime: ...Mm.
Jaime looks up "newpath ruddman sex scandal" for good measure
Mac D.: the search engine scolds jaime
Steph: They seem pretty, uh, pretty legit.
Mac D.: for thinking that mister ruddman would do such a thing
Narrator : Oh- he found s- nevermind, that was rudding, not ruddman
Jaime: ...Yeah, legit.
Forrest: That doesn't mean he's clean.
Jaime closes the window before shutting off the phone screen
Space: hey seer do you have the calendar
Ken: The best criminals are the ones who are never caught.
yes
Forrest: Any half-competent company can put on a good face.
Steph: Well, we'll just have to be like... uh, those guys who caught Al Capone f
or tax evasion.
Space: can i see it pls
eldritch s. (GM): http://teamup.com/ks11f3df36e95dd623/
Forrest: Right.
Jaime: Where does he get his lumber?
eldritch s. (GM): the irs
Forrest: I would assume legal foresting areas.
"Where does a lumber company get its lumber" is a question anyone would ask. It'
s the most obvious thing to do legitly.
Jaime: ...Well, it can't be that renewable, can it?

Ken: Hm...
Forrest: They do have reforesting efforts.
Ken: why did you need to see it space
Space: doublechecking the naomi date
Jaime: Efforts.
So, how're those looking?
Forrest: I can safely say Canada is not devoid of trees at the moment, so.
Steph: If we're gonna find anything beyond, like, the most immediately obvious a
nd legit stuff, we're gonna need access to their stuff.
Steph checks for NewPath's address
Forrest: The question is how do we get it.
We're not trained in espionage in any way.
Narrator : The HQ is on 1024 Peter Ave.
Jaime: I am an Outlaw, but... yeah, no.
Narrator : write that down for me
in your notes
Steph checks in her notes to see if that's the same address that Ruddman said to
bring the gun back to and what-have-you
Narrator : it's not
looking at it now, the gun address is on the waterfront
Steph notes that down
Steph: Well, the important thing is, we have options.
Forrest: Right.
Jaime: And it's not like the election's tomorrow, right?
Forrest: ....Are we finished.
Steph: It's... not tomorrow? But it's close.
Jaime: So, yeah. We've got options.
Steph: ...Oh, shit, that's right.
I just remembered.
Jaime: What?
Steph: Um... you know the guy who attacked the school? With the bat.
Forrest: ......
Jaime: ...Yeah.
Steph: He's--... oh, Forrest, did you tell them already?
Forrest: No.
Steph: Oh.
...He's dead.
Jaime: ...
Ken: Oh dear...
Jaime: When'd this happen?
Forrest: ...
Steph: Not very long ago. Forrest was there, it's - it's when we were poking aro
und the part of the school that's... y'know, where you go into the Second Heaven
. That part.
Forrest: Oh, yeah, we found a box full of money addressed to Nurse Foxhole there
, too.
Steph: Yeah, from Vlad.
Jaime: ...
Steph: Uh... the box kind of opened weird, so we didn't put it back.
Couldn't be helped.
Jaime: You have it?
Steph: Uh huh.
Forrest: We do.
Jaime: It's not marked or anything like that, righr?
*right
Space: oh my god i think
they found the money and saw the lunatic dying today? it's still the same day re
ading the archive ?
Forrest: It was addressed to Foxhole. Steph's seen Vlad make exchanges with Foxh
ole before.
Steph: Yeah.
Mac D.: naw it's the following day i remember
Space: oh shit
yeah your right
Jaime: And this was just left next to a dead body.
Forrest: No. We saw the man die.
That Iblis thing was what killed him.
Steph: It, uh... the money was in a locker. We found it before we found the guy.
Jaime nods
Jaime: Wait - so, if Iblis went after him...
Steph: He's mixed up in all this too. I'm pretty sure he is, at least.
Ken: ...
Steph: Well... was. Mixed up.
Forrest: ...
Jaime: ...Mm.
Steph: ...Anyways, that's all I got.
Ken: jaime
say him
*saw him
yesterday
and he started strangling glass
remember
Forrest: ....Alright then.
If that's all, I've got other things I need to od.
Fawkes M.: He remembers the fucko, yes
Forrest: *do
Ken: ok he's just chosing not to mention it
Steph: Where're you going?
Ken: ... It seems that is all- there is a memorial for Naomi tomorrow.
*vigil
Steph nods
Forrest: I just said I have things to do.
Things to find out.
Steph: I mean, that implies you're going somewhere.
Forrest: I'm not going anywhere specific.
Jaime: We have that film project, but...
Forrest: We can work on that in-class.
Steph: It's due really soon, so...
...
Forrest: It's due in several school days.
We are allotted time in-class to do it.
Steph: ...Yeah. I dunno. Sorry.
Jaime: ...Where's Gabby? She was coming here, wasn't she?
Steph 's mood seems to have shifted a bit negatively really fast
Steph: Maybe she's late.
Forrest: She could have gotten sidetracked.
Forrest: ...
Steph: What?
Forrest: What's upset you all of a sudden.
Steph: Ugh.
Jaime: ...
Forrest: Why are Uggs suddenly making you so upset.

Ken: ...
Steph really is not liking the sudden silence and change of subject
Steph: Nothing is.
Ken is just quiet as he typically is
Forrest: Something clearly is.
Steph: Okay, I'll spell it out for you.
It's Naomi. I still feel awful about that. Okay? Now just drop it.
Forrest: ......
.....What made you think of her, we weren't talking about her.
Ken mentioned the vigil not one minute ago
Steph: Do you just not listen to Ken? What the fuck.
Forrest keepin it
Ken: sage archetype my ass
Forrest: ...Oh, right, the vigil. My mistake
.
Ken: There is no reason to be upset.
What has happened has happened. All we can do now is stop it from happening agai
n.
Jaime: ...
Steph: ...Let's just talk about something else for now. Sorry.
Forrest: There's nothing else to discuss.
Steph: Oh.
Jaime: ...You wanna head out?
Forrest: I'll excuse myself, thank you.
Forrest stands up and goes to leave
Steph: ...Uhm... Thanks for having us over, Ken. If Gabby shows up, do you think
you could fill her in on stuff? It's important that we all stick on the same pa
ge.
Forrest : STREETWALKER
Forrest: pardon me: comatose gabby
Fawkes M.: She's just doing the Time Warp
Ken nods
Ken: I will.
Steph: Alright... thanks again.
Narrator : where is forrest going
Steph: Mind if I tag along with you, Jaime?
Jaime: ...Sure. I mean, I don't mind.
Mac D.: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH
Jaime has just gathered his Few Stuffs
Mac D.: over heeere
Tabitha St. Marie stops Forrest
Forrest: .....?
Steph: Okay, cool.
Forrest: ....Oh-..You.
Jaime nods, then opens the door
Steph steps out into the rain
Jaime: Oh, and - thanks, Ken.
Tabitha St. Marie: Hellllllo my little partner!
Jaime follows out into za raino

Forrest: ......Don't call me that.
Ken: Think nothing of it.
Steph: Where to?
Tabitha St. Marie: Why not? You're my little partner!
Jaime: Hmm...
Forrest: I'm serious.
.....Have you found anything, yet.
Jaime: Your place is closer, right?
Steph: Yes indeed.
Steph goes next door
Tabitha St. Marie: shit
i forget the exact terms of the deal they made wit tab
Jaime: ...Agh. I'm groggier than I thought.
Jaime follows
Tabitha St. Marie: can't find shit in the chat recird
i need help
Mac D.: "help us dig up information and you can publish the story"
Tabitha St. Marie: on whom
Steph: ctrl f this
Forrest: ......Shoulda figured the first time....Alright, listen.
Mac D.: the mysterious explosion of Old Belmont School
Space: Forrest: ...Alright, we're going to need names of witnesses to the explos
ion who're still alive, and blueprints of the school building from 1960 and onwa
rd.
Steph rubs the buddha for Good Luck as she enters
Tabitha St. Marie smiles
Jaime does not, oblivious to the Possibly Buddhist Custom
Tabitha St. Marie: I'm working on it.
With elections on, I'm very busy, you know.
Narrator : Her house is occupied by her Grandfajja in his study.
Steph: Grandpa, I'm home! And I brought a friend!
Forrest: ......Right
Ronald Karling exits the study
Forrest: ..........Elections..............
Forrest and then
Ronald Karling: Ah, excellent!
Forrest inspiration.
Forrest: .........I have another deal to make with you.
Ronald Karling: Come, shake my hand..
Tabitha St. Marie: I love deals~
Forrest: Good, then you might appreciate this one.
I'm looking for dirt on John Ruddman.
Jaime: Oh - hey. Good afternoon, right?
Jaime extends a hand
Tabitha St. Marie: Ooooooh!
Forrest: And I need a way of getting that dirt out to the public.
Ronald Karling shakes it
Steph smiles, folding her arms

Ronald Karling: Good afternoon.
Well, I'll trust you two not to tear up my home with some drug-fueled romp.
If you'll excuse me, I've nearly perfected by dart throw...
*my
Mac D.: "Papaaaa! You're embarassing meeee~"
Steph: He's the best Granddad ever, y'know. That's pretty much a solid fact.
Tabitha St. Marie: Oh, this is going to be a challenge...
But I like challenges...
What's in it for me?
Jaime: Alright, take care.
Jaime: How so? I mean, you've had worse granddads to compare him to?
Forrest: Same as last time. You can take credit.
Ronald Karling returns to his study
Tabitha St. Marie: I could have done this anyway.
That's not much of a deal as it is a suggestion.
Steph: There's been scientific studies done. It's been proven by a bunch of old
men in labcoats.
Forrest: You could, but not with a nugget of information I know.
Tabitha St. Marie: You could know nothing at all...
Jaime: Old grandpas in labcoats?
That's not exactly a fair study, is it?
Tabitha St. Marie: Maybe you just hate the Liberals...
Steph: If they're grandpas, and they're saying he's the best grandpa, then obvio
usly they know what they're talking about.
Steph heads for the living room
Forrest: I just don't trust Ruddman, is all.
Jaime: ...Hang on.
Forrest: And I'm always looking to uncover the seedy underbelly of Corporate Can
ada and its government.
Jaime pats his pockets
Steph: What's up?
Tabitha St. Marie: Mmm... fine- but only because I like you.
Forrest: Great.
Jaime: I don't have my wallet.
Steph: Did you leave it at home?
Tabitha St. Marie: If you'll excuse me, I have some pictures to take of Jerry Nu
ll...
Jaime: Pretty sure I had it with me. Probably fell out of my pocket at Ken's hou
se.
Forrest watches her trot off
Forrest: ..........
Forrest Next Objective: Find.......A TEACHER
Steph: Well, he's right next door. You could run and ask quick.
Narrator : roll for it forrest
Jaime: Right, yeah.
Jaime heads for the door
(
18
+
18
+
2
)+1
= 39
Steph follows the man
Narrator : Jaime is immediately plowed into by a car.
Jaime: Oh, uh - you don't GHK--!
Steph: Jesus Christ!
Narrator : He finds Mr. Rosencrantz at the entrance to Chinatown
Ed Stuart stops the car
Mac D.: "WINTER IS COMING, LANCASTER"
Ed Stuart: Hell, hell, hell...
Mac D.: "STUARTS FOR LIFE"
Ed Stuart immediately pops out
Mac D.: he flashes a gang sign and drives off
Steph: Oh, shit... Jaime, are you okay? Holy shit...
Jaime: N...ngh... the hell...
Forrest: .....?
Ed Stuart: ... Jaime Lancaster...?
Forrest ah.....a "teacher"
Forrest approaches Mr. Rozencrantz
Jaime: ...
Steph: Are you hurt? How many fingers am I holding up?
Forrest: Excuse me.
Jaime grimaces, looking up
Alfonse Jiang: Ah- fuck!
Jaime: Uh...
....
Alfonse Jiang: Oh- he's not dead...
Jaime: ...Oh. Ed.
Ed Stuart: ...
Jaime winces again
Ed Stuart: I'll...
...
Alfonse Jiang calls 911
Mac D.: "WINTERISCOMING -skeedaddles cackling_"
Steph: I'm gonna call an ambulance. Y-- oh.
Steph quietly thankful she doesn't have to call
Mr. Rosencrantz: ... oh!
Hello!
How can I help you?
Mac D.: "god i am SO glad i didn't have to help my friend"
Space: calling 911 is Stressful
Ed Stuart sits by him, determined
Mac D.: steph truly is the true monster
Jaime: ...Nnnngh...
Steph: Listen, Jaime, you're gonna be fine. Help's on the way.
Jaime trying and failing to force himself up
Ed Stuart: ... I'll give you my insurance information- sit down!

Steph: Don't move! Don't move.
Jaime: Yeah, yeah, right, yeah, right...
Forrest: Yes...I need to ask you some questions.
Ed Stuart begins writing down his info
Jaime lies back down
Mr. Rosencrantz: I'm all ears.
Forrest: How well do you know Ms. Lao?
Alfonse Jiang: Eh? Yeah, he's been hit by a car.
He's not dead.
And the guy who hit him is sitting down.
Yeah, uh huh.
Alright.
Jaime looks up at Ed
Alfonse Jiang: Bye-bye now.
Jaime: ...Are we on a sidewalk?
Alfonse Jiang hangs it up
Jaime: I'm pretty sure we're on a sidewalk.
Alfonse Jiang: Looks like they'll be here in a minute.
Steph: Oh my god, how hard did you hit him?
Ed Stuart: ...
... There was a dog on the road.
Steph: Oh...
Jaime: Yeah, breaks.
Jaime winces again
Ed Stuart: It is raining.
I hydroplaned.
Mr. Rosencrantz: About as well as everyone else knows here.
Steph: .......Uh, thanks for calling an ambulance, guy.
Mr. Rosencrantz: Why?
Jaime: ...Nrrgh. Least you didn't plow into her or her house.
Alfonse Jiang: Don't talk to me- talk to the kid, he's the one who might die!
Jaime: Yeah, I stopped a car...
Forrest: I'm curious to know about her, since I'm new here, and I haven't really
had a class with her yet.
Steph: Okay, okay, okay...
Jaime just has a pained undertone to his voice now
Mr. Rosencrantz: I mean, what do you want to know?
Ed Stuart: ...
Steph: Uh... look, Jaime, it could be worse. I mean, you're conscious, you're st
ill talking...
Ed Stuart just stuffs the paper with the insurance info in his shirt
Steph: Just keep that in mind?
Forrest: Do you know if she had any friends. Anyone particularly close to her.
Jaime: Oh, yeah. Sure as hell ain't worse than anything like a poisoned scratch
or gas...
Ed Stuart: ...
Jaime: ...
Mr. Rosencrantz: I mean- all the staff are pretty close.
Steph: Yeah, that. Uh... okay. Do - do you have that insurance stuff written dow
n yet, guy?
Ed Stuart: I just put it in his pocket.
... Sorry, about that.
Forrest: Anyone in particular.

Jaime: ...
Didn't know you drove, Ed.
I don't...
Mr. Rosencrantz: I really couldn't say.
Forrest: .....
Forrest exhales
Forrest: ....Okay....Which of the staff did she end up working with the most oft
en.
Ed Stuart: ... I was driving with Robert's father... I don't know where he is...
Steph: ...?
Mr. Rosencrantz: Foxhole, I'd guess.
Forrest: ...
Jaime: Probably ran to the nearest Burger King or something like that.
Forrest FOXHOLE......
Mr. Rosencrantz: He has a minor in history, and sometimes they would collaborate
.
Forrest: He's been subbing for her in my history classes as of late.
Mr. Rosencrantz: Yeah, I know.
Forrest: ...Thank you. Have a good day.
Mr. Rosencrantz: You too, stay safe.
Jaime: ...Just like during that summer job he offered me.
Ed Stuart: ... YeNarrator : The ambulance pulls up.
Steph: Oh, thank god.
Steph backs away to let them work
Jaime: ...Mm.
Narrator : They do their EMT thing and hoist him in, racing off
Forrest nods to him, walking off and making mental notes
Forrest FOXHOOOOLE............
Steph: ...
Steph exhales
Narrator : Jaime ends up in the hospital.
The police eventually show up and arrest Ed.
Mac D.: the doctors rebuild him into their cyborg weapon
Narrator : Ed is totally with the arrest.
Jaime: fuck yeah, a new right hand
cannon
Mac D.: "now go, jaime. kill for the board of health"
Steph: ...
Steph is at a little bit of a loss now
Forrest there's always the fat one, steph
Steph texts Forrest quickly
Forrest: ....?
Steph: 'jaime got hit by a fucking car'
Alfonse Jiang stands in the middle of the street
Forrest: 'Again.'
Steph: 'he's in the hospital'
Fawkes M.: I just realized
Forrest: 'How badly is he hurt.'
Fawkes M.: Jaime's wallet is still somewhere in Ken's house

Alfonse Jiang: ... And that is why, if elected- I will petition to ban automobil
es!
Steph: 'he was still talking to me and stuff? still conscious'
Alfonse Jiang: ken is rich now
Steph: ...
Forrest: .....
Steph has a strange sort of respect for Alfonse
Fawkes M.: He founds a company
Space: competing logging company
Alfonse Jiang: Cars are instruments of Satan- and it just attacked that young bo
y!
Mac D.: capitalizing on the suffering of others makes steph wet
Alfonse Jiang: So let's attack them, too!
Steph: :)!!!
Sherwood Cotter: ... You are an idiot.
Clown.
Forrest: 'So he's in the hospital now.'
Sherwood Cotter walks away
Steph: 'Yeah he's in the hospital'
Alfonse Jiang adjusts his soaked hair
Forrest: 'Okay.'
.......
Alfonse Jiang: Pansies!
Forrest well FUCKIN 'ELL
Alfonse Jiang: No vision!
I'll win, just you watch me!
Cornelius forever!
Forrest decides to try and make his way to the HOPSPSITAL
Alfonse Jiang marches off
Steph: ...
'what are you doing now'
Forrest: 'I'm going to the hospital to check on him what are you doing.'
Jasper was watching this whole thing
Steph: 'ok i'll meet you there'
Steph looks up
Steph notices Jasper
Steph: ...
Dr. Hall is on his cell phone, hurridly whispering
(
4
+
16
+
10
)+1
= 31
Jasper: ...
Forrest: take me to the hospital motherfucker
Steph: .........
Steph discomfort
Narrator : Forrest enters the hospital.
Steph hurries on her way to the hospital
Narrator : Jaime is in the emergency room.
The doctors tell him to fuck off.
Forrest: ........
Narrator : Eventually, after waiting.
They take him to the plain old ICU
and they let them talk for a bit
Mac D.: the doctors still tell forrest fo cuk off
Narrator watches Steph go
Narrator : i mean jasper does
Forrest looks over the battered, broken body of his dear Person He Knows Sort Of
Jasper: ... He won't die.
Jaime: ...
I'm guessing Steph told you.
Forrest: Who did this to you.
Steph looks back at Jasper
Steph: God, I hope not...
Jaime: Just someone I knew. Who's, apparently, the worst driver in the world.
Jasper: It didn't look lethal.
Forrest: .....So it was an accident.
Jasper: His body glanced off of it, if you were paying attention.
It wouldn't have absorbed too much force.
Jaime: Yeah, well if it was on purpose I'd probably be dead.
Steph: No, yeah, he - he was still conscious and talking and all...
Jaime: ...Too sincere for his own good.
Steph is still shaken up
Jasper: If you know it is unlikely that he'll die, you shouldn't worry.
Forrest: ......I don't know who that is.
Jaime: You ever see a guy carrying, like, fifteen winter coats at once?
Forrest: No.
Jaime: ...Lucky.
Forrest: Why does he have so many coats.
Jaime: Family business. He and his family all sell winter coats all year round.
Steph: Still, I mean, it's... startling as fuck. You know? Just - something like
that out of the blue. Just completely out of nowhere.
Forrest: .....I see.
Jasper: Yes, but it already happened.
Jaime: ...Last I checked Facebook, his girlfriend got in on it, too.
Jasper: It's not so startling anymore.
Jaime: Heh. Only Kat...
Jaime still sounds vaguely in pain
Forrest: .....
....I should go, so you can get your rest.
Steph: Then I guess now it's... the what-if's? What if he was going faster, what
if he hit him dead-on...
Jasper: But he didn't.
Jaime: Hey, I'm fine...
Jasper: Hypothetical are pointless.
Forrest: You look like you just got hit by a car. Because you just got hit by a
car.
Jasper: He is not dead, making yourself upset over the possibility of him having
died is pointless.
Jaime: Yeah, well - not enough for morphine.
Jasper: You should be happy.
Jaime: Which is good, isn't it?
Jasper: Or sad, if you hate him.
Forrest: Good how.
Jasper: You don't hate him, though.
But I'm sure someone does.
Jaime: Good that they're not giving me drugs, I mean.
Forrest: ...Oh. Right.
That's good, yeah.
....
Forrest texts stephu
Forrest: 'He's fine. He's in the ICU right now.'
Steph: ... I mean... you can say that, and logically, I know you're right, but t
hat doesn't diminish the -- you know, the instinctive fear response I'm-Jaime: ...Probably gonna need it later, though.
Steph: ...?
Jaime: Dunno.
Steph checks quickly
Steph: Oh, thank god, he's fine.
Jaime: You know a lot about broken bones?
Jasper begins walking away
Steph: ...?
Forrest: ..We'll see.
Jaime: ...Or fractures, whatever.
Steph pockets her phone, watching Jasper go
Forrest: I know they hurt.
Steph: ...
Steph ducks against the wall for some shelter from the rain, texting Forrest aga
in
Steph: 'Are they letting you see him?'
Jaime: And the sun rises every morning.
Forrest: ...?
Narrator : Ad octor walks into the ICU
Forrest checks fone
Forrest: 'Yeah.'
..?
Forrest notices Doktor
Jaime: I mean ...
Doctor: Oh, hello there, just let me through, I need to see the patient...
Forrest: ......
Forrest steps back
Steph starts on her way for the hospital herself
Jaime: ...You gonna check for things?
Mac D.: "yeah, a pulse"
he draws an AK
Doctor: Yes, yes, lots of things...
Narrator : The doctor begins examining the machines, "hmmming" and noding
Forrest: ..............
Narrator : He collects a few of the bottles and needles in the room

Doctor: ... Very interesting...
Forrest looks closely at the doctor
Jaime: ...Yeah?
(
6
+
4
+
9
)+1
= 20
Narrator : steph shows up in the ICU
Seems Legit
Jaime: yeowch
Narrator : jaime roll mind
Forrest: ...
Steph tries to find the room where the Jaime is
Jaime: rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} - 1
{{(
13
+
14
+
15
)}}-1
= 13
Narrator : steph roll mind
Steph: rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} + 0
{{(
6
+
5
+
16
)}}+0
= 6
Narrator : Jaime clearly sees who this man is
Steph gets lost in the ICU
Steph: ...I hate hospitals...
Forrest: ......
Steph texts Forrest again
Richard Moneypenny: Very interesting...
Fawkes M.: I can't recall if/when Jaime's been Moneypenny'd before
Richard Moneypenny: at the resteraunt
Steph: 'i am lost in the ICU and everything smells like disinfectant and sadness
here'
Fawkes M.: Right, right
Richard Moneypenny: when he was "the master"
Richard Moneypenny is shoving morphine and needles into his coat
Jaime: Yeah...
Forrest: .....
Richard Moneypenny: Yes, I think we'll definitely have to upgrade to fifty CCs..
.
Forrest looks down at the phone and TEXT
Jaime: ...You sure you're a doctor?
Forrest: 'We're in Room [Number]'
Richard Moneypenny: Oh, 100 percent sure.
Forrest: ......
Richard Moneypenny: I went to Harvard, you know?
Forrest: You're not being very careful with those needles for a doctor
Jaime: Yeah, well, I'm definitely an Irish chef...
Richard Moneypenny: Because I know my business.
Steph heads to Room Number
Richard Moneypenny: Chinese, thank you very much!
Mac D.: is richard doing a new voice
Richard Moneypenny: yes
he is impersonating
dr. phil's voice
Jaime: What're you using that morphine for, anyhow?
Richard Moneypenny: steph shows up
Forrest: .........
Richard Moneypenny: steph roll mind
{{(
19
+
17
+
19
)}}+0
= 19
Forrest this......does not feel legit
Richard Moneypenny: We're going to put this in the drug machine, and up your dos
e.
Richard Moneypenny is clearly not a doctor
Steph: ...What the fuck is this?
Richard Moneypenny looks at Steph
Richard Moneypenny quickly pulls out a needle and hovers it over his own neck
Forrest: .........
......Oh.
It's you.
Jaime: ...
Richard Moneypenny: If you take one more fucking step- I will infect myself with
this disease and spread it to each one of you little shits.
Steph: For fuck's sake. Come the fuck on.
Forrest: ........
Forrest wait a minute
Richard Moneypenny: You want Ebola?
Forrest isn't that morphine
Richard Moneypenny is slowly trying to creep past
Steph: Do it. Fucking do it! We're in a hospital, asshole. What the fuck are you
going to do?
Jaime: ...Well, I don't want morphine, either.

Steph stands in the doorway
Richard Moneypenny well actually it's an empty syringe
Forrest STEP forward
Richard Moneypenny sticks it into his arm and takes some of his own blood
Richard Moneypenny: Get away!
Or I'll inject you with my blood!
Steph peers out into the hallway for an Actual medical professional
Jaime: .....
Narrator : All the staff are busy.
Forrest: ....I don't think that's going to do anything.
Narrator : Someone smeared shit all over the floor.
Steph: Fucking hospitals.
Motherfucker.
Richard Moneypenny has a shitty rag in his pocket
Richard Moneypenny: I have diseases!
Space: jesus christ
Forrest: What were you trying to do.
Richard Moneypenny: Stealing drugs, what the fuck do you think I was doing?
Forrest: .....Oh.
Forrest steps back
Forrest: By all means, then, leave.
Richard Moneypenny: Alright.
I will.
Steph: Go fuck yourself.
Richard Moneypenny takes the rag out of his pocket
Richard Moneypenny throws it at her before running off
{{(
19
+
15
+
12
)}}+1
= 16
Jaime: ...
Narrator : She dodges it.
Mac D.: it lands inside Jaime's IV
Steph: ...What a fucking child.
Forrest: Are we going to call the police.
Steph: No. Forget that. That'd give his fucking antics some legitimacy.
Steph deep breaths...
Forrest: We should let them know he came in and stole drugs.
I'll go tell the doctors.
Steph: Yeah, you do that.
Jaime: Do whatever you want...
Steph goes over to Jaime's side
Jaime winces again

Forrest: Get well soon, Jaime.
Forrest goes to let the Actual Medical Professionals know that a man ran in, sto
le medical equipment and drugs, and fled
Jaime: Yeah, thanks.
Steph: So, hi.
Doctor: ... Shit.
Steph: Came here as soon as I could.
Doctor: Well- eh, thank God you're alright
Forrest nods
Forrest and quietly skeedaddles from the hopspital
Forrest Freeman: STREETWALKER
Jaime: ...Wasn't too bad a walk, right?
Narrator : where does forrest go from here
Steph: No. Not really.
Steph wrings some rainwater out from her ponytail
Steph: Jasper saw the whole thing, she was there too.
Forrest with the Acquaintainces sudden vehicular attack addressed and more infor
mation gathered, there is only one place to go.....THE FOX HOLE.....
Forrest: ...................
Jaime: You didn't bring her with you, or anything like that?
Narrator : He finds his prey in Chinatown
Forrest briefly considers sharing his theory with Jaime and Steph
Forrest BUT THEN...
Steph: No, she walked off once Forrest texted me.
Uh... it was weird. I think she was trying to... reassure? Me? In her own way.
Nurse Foxhole is telling knock knock jokes to the most stonefaced motherfucker
Forrest: .........
Jaime: ...Mm.
Forrest: .......Excuse me.
Jerry Null: Thank you for your time.
Jerry Null marches off
Forrest moves to take Jerry's place
Jaime: ...So, yeah, not my finest moment.
Nurse Foxhole: Eh- oh, you!
Jaime: Definitely not Ed's, either.
Nurse Foxhole: The Americano!
Forrest: Yes.
Steph: It was an accident, you're alive... I'm counting my blessings here.
Nurse Foxhole: Whadda ya need from old Foxhole?
Forrest: I'm sorry if I interrupted, but I wanted to ask you a few questions, co
ncerning Ms. Lao.
Nurse Foxhole: Shoot.
Forrest: Well, I was just curious, since my only history classes have been with
you.
What do you know about Ms. Lao.
Jaime: Hey - at least it didn't poison me, or anything.
Nurse Foxhole: Oh, she was really fun.
Jaime: ...I hope not, anyway.
Nurse Foxhole: Loved jokes, parties, all that.

Steph: That'd be pretty fucked if it did.
Nurse Foxhole: She was like me, but a lady.
And not as devilishly handsome.
Nurse Foxhole grins
Nurse Foxhole: Though- you'll notice...
Steph: Uh... so, geez, how long are you gonna be out?
Nurse Foxhole: Recently she's gotten a lot...
Sadder.
Forrest: ....I have.
I've seen her at the library.
Nurse Foxhole: I don't know why, if that's what you're meaning to know...
Nurse Foxhole frowns
Jaime: Well, I don't think anything's really broken, so...
Nurse Foxhole: Kills me, she was probably the least abrasive of the staff, too.
Jaime: I don't know. Guess I'll have to wait.
Forrest: ......
Forrest sniffs him out for Bullshit
(
2
+
11
+
1
)+1
= 15
Mac D.: god bless my ability...
Nurse Foxhole adjusts his sunglasses with a glint
Steph: Well, like... I could bring you homework and stuff, or something? I dunno
how hospitals do that kind of thing.
Nurse Foxhole: ...
Jaime: Eh, I'll worry about it once I'm out.
Nurse Foxhole: She loves talking history, though.
Jaime: Though... actually, yeah, might not be a bad idea.
Nurse Foxhole: If you want to get her going, start on that.
Last I checked- she was going through a real Russian Revolution thing.
Forrest: ....
Forrest mental note
Steph: Yeah. Catching up on junk should be the last thing you need to worry abou
t.
Mac D.: also seer was the sunglasses-adjusting the result of the Bullshit Detect
ion
Nurse Foxhole: yes, as you got an inconclusive result
Jaime: ...You'll be fine with it?
Mac D.: as in i failed or it was just inconclusive
Steph: I'd do it anyways even if I wasn't fine with it.
...Well, I mean, that's a lie, but you get the gist of what I mean.
Nurse Foxhole: you failed
Jaime: Mm. Thanks.
...
Mac D.: b-but......muh ability...............
Jaime winces again
Mac D.: Increase all rolls for determining if someone is lying or being dishones
t.
Nurse Foxhole: no he was telling the truth then
Mac D.: ok then just wanted to make SURE
Steph: ...Sorry about that.
Jaime: About what?
Forrest: .....Do you know anything about her life outside of school.
Steph: Well... it's my house you ran out of. If we had waited just a little long
er, y'know?
Nurse Foxhole: Uh...
Steph: ...
This stuff can really just happen in an instant, huh?
Nurse Foxhole: She likes movies? That's a personal question and it would be rude
to start spelling her personal info like that.
Jaime: ...Hey.
I'll be fine.
Forrest: ....I understand, but I want insight as to why she's suddenly become so
depressed.
......I'm concerned.
Steph smirks, after a moment
Nurse Foxhole: That's still, uh, pretty private.
And if I knew, I'd be trying to fix it.
Forrest yeah you just want to hide the fact that you KNOCKED HER UP you piece of
fucking
Forrest: .....
Steph: You'd better. Otherwise I'll have to start hanging out with Forrest more.
Nurse Foxhole coughs into his elbow
Nurse Foxhole: Anything else...?
Jaime: ...Really, now?
Forrest: .....No, I think that's it. Thank you for your time.
Jaime: I thought you said this hospital wasn't gonna be much of a problem to get
to.
Nurse Foxhole: Yeah, have a good one.
Forrest nods, and walks off
Forrest you pink-haired motherfucker i'll fucking get you yet
Forrest: ......
Steph: 'Not much' of a problem is still 'a problem.'
Forrest: .....Movies....
Forrest is reminded of Ms. Lachance
Jaime: Right, right.
...
Narrator : i feel like calling it here
Mac D.: it IS 1:30 in the morning
Space: works 4 me
Mac D.: oh wait hold on
Forrest: .....
Space holds
Forrest decides to text Steph
Forrest: 'I think Ms. Lao was raped.'
Steph: ...?
Steph looks at her phone
Steph: ...
Jaime: Hey, so...

Mac D.: draw curtains
Jaime is oblivious to texts going on
Mac D.: smash cut to credits
Space: that was a good session
Narrator : i don't know what the devil became of mobiel
Mac D.: schoolwork is hard
Space: kind of her to let us go on w/o her
Fawkes M.: Schoolwork is hard
Space: i forget -- is anything scheduled for Saturday and is mobile able to make
Saturday (fug i don't think she is come to think of it)
Mac D.: i got work till 6 PM on saturday so i should be good
Fawkes M.: I thought tomorrow was AdEVA day
Space: tomorrow's friday
Mac D.: not where i live
technically
Space: today's friday fuck you
Fawkes M.: Eastern scrub
s
Space: this is a rad song
Fawkes M.: Tis
Narrator : tits
Space: it was a good sesh seer
Narrator : thnks
eldritch s. (GM): i've got a place
where there's refuge
Space: where is it
eldritch s. (GM): on twenty seven THOUSAND ACRES
Mac D.: EUAGCJ
Narrator : how was bussines, duff
Mac D.: pain
Mobile L: Los negocios
Space: mac duffy legitimate businessman
Mobile L: Hay mucho dolor
Mac D.: p a i n
Narrator : the intro that we shall have while jaime is in hospital
Mobile L: Shit yes
Narrator : After her visit, Steph is force from the hospital by staff, citing "O
rders from the top."
*forced
Gabby finally arrives at Steph's home after getting lost.
*Ken's
It is late.
There seems to have been some sort of CAR ACCIDENT on the road
Narrator : Forrest goes home.
Bryce Freeman is making dinner
Gabby: ...Whoa, frick...
Forrest: I'm home, Dad.
Steph: ...
Bryce Freeman: Hi, Forrest!
Steph her paranoia increases
Gabby cautiously approaches the door, ogling the accident scene heavily
Steph since there's nothing to do about it, she starts home
Loren Freeman is playing with Sooz
Narrator : Skid marks and all that.

Forrest: Did you have work today?
Gabby: ...Frickin' heck.
Gabby gently knocks on the Ken door
Bryce Freeman: Heh, you bet.
Ken answers
Ken: ... Ah, hello, Gabby.
Forrest: Was it okay?
Gabby: ...Hey. Uh, sorry, I'm super late. I got kinda turned around... Did I mis
s the stuff?
Steph texts Forrest on her way
Steph: 'some doctor kicked me out'
Gabby: Also, um... Do you know what happened over there? Looks like a pretty fri
ckin' bad wreck...
Forrest looks down at his phone
Forrest: ...
'Okay.'
Richard Moneypenny: Well- look who got kicked out of the fucking hospital?
Richard Moneypenny just showed up out of nowhere
Steph: Oh, what do you want now?
Ken: ... I don't know about the wreck- but let me tell you what was said...
Ken fills her in, I assume you've read the archive, mob?
Bryce Freeman: I saw a deer, it was fantastic.
Mobile L: I skimmed it, and I don't think I caught some of the discussion
Bryce Freeman: I've also found out about this stuff- Canadian Mac and Cheese, yo
u'll like it- Kraft Dinner.
Narrator : basically
ruddman running for liberal seat
they're planning on digging up shit on him
Forrest: ......Isn't that in America, too?
Narrator : he owns a company, it's pretty important, not open;y sletchy, it's ca
lled NewPath
Mobile L: Ooh, gotcha. And Hall is on the Board, yes?
Narrator : yes, so is ruddman
Space: logging company w/ mining + oil
Bryce Freeman: Ah, but this is Canadian.
They have good chocolate here- I just had a Big Turk! I'm already very integrate
d, eh!
Gabby: ...That's... That's fricked up. I guess they all went off to start trying
to frick things up for Ruddman, right?
Richard Moneypenny: Oh, nothing.
Just come to see how the high and mighty have gotten kicked out of a hospital.
You're just like me.
And we can work together...
Forrest: ....Uh...
....So, Mac N Cheese for dinner?
Mobile L: "Join me, and together we'll rule the galax... erm, province."
Ken: It seems so.
Steph: Okay, I didn't pretend to be a doctor.
Loren Freeman quietly listens to her home and native land suffer this mockery
Bryce Freeman: You bet!
Steph: Besides, what the hell would you want with me?
Richard Moneypenny: With your lack of any skills...
Gabby: ...Huh. I'd go too, but, like... 's pretty late now.
Richard Moneypenny: And ugly-ass face...
I can have a distraction for my schemes...
You would, of course, get a cut.
Gabby: God, and I always thought my fricking sense of direction was decent, guhh
hh...
Ken: It's no problem.
... Would you like me to walk you home?
Forrest: .....Uh... Mom?
Loren Freeman: What is it, Forrest?
Steph: So, what you're saying is, you want me to take the fall for whatever it i
s you come up with next? Because that's what I'm getting from you here.
Richard Moneypenny: God, you're so short-sighted...
You would have a disguise!
Gabby: ...Oh, um... I mean, I don't wanna trouble you or anything...
Forrest: There's something I need to talk to you about. It's kind of serious....
.
Steph: Yeah, because those always end up working out so well for you, huh?
Richard Moneypenny is already applying a disguise, his old Fu-Manchu
Richard Moneypenny: Fooled you.
Ken: It is no bother.
Loren Freeman nods
Loren Freeman: Soozie, take care of Bryce for a minute.
Loren Freeman stands up and walks into another room
Loren Freeman: Come on, Forrest, let's talk.
Forrest follows her
Gabby: ...Okay. Uh, and... Thanks.
Gabby smiles gently
Steph: Oh. for fuck's sake.
Gabby maximum kokoro dokis
Forrest: ....Okay, so, there's this girl I talk to at school.
Richard Moneypenny begins doing a racist engrish accent
Mobile L: Almost got sent to Walmart a second ago
Richard Moneypenny: Oh, what ewah do you mean, miss? Noffing if wong wiff riking
Chinese food...
Forrest: She told me she found a gun on the street, and she wants to turn it in,
but she doesn't know where to go.
Gabby senses a disturbance in the force
Steph: Knock it off. Jesus Christ.
Ken begins walking her home
Loren Freeman: She should probably just bring it the police.
Gabby walks alongside him, sticking very close to him and looking out for danger
Richard Moneypenny: Come on- don't be a pussy.
Narrator : There is no danger to be had, and eventually Gabby is returned safely
to her home.
Forrest: I told her to do that, too, but she's really nervous around strangers.
Loren Freeman: Have her give it to you, then, and you can give it to me.
Steph: Do you expect me to just... trust you? Just like that?
Richard Moneypenny: Yes.
Steph: Why?
Forrest nods
Ken: Well, I guess this is goodnight.
Forrest: Okay, then, I'll let her know. Thanks, Mom.
Richard Moneypenny: How the fuck should I know?
Gabby: Yeah... Thanks again, Ken, seriously.
Gabby smiles warmly and nods
Loren Freeman: You're welcome, Forrest.
Steph: If you don't know, then how the fuck should I know??
Ken nods and walks back to his home
Forrest goes to text
Gabby watches him as he leaves
Forrest: 'I talked to my Mom about the gun.'
Gabby: ...Be careful, now.
Richard Moneypenny: Do I look like a fucking mindreader to you?
Hold on...
Richard Moneypenny reaches into his coat and begins making a purple turban
Steph: Ugh.
Steph checks her phone
Gabby sighs and ducks into her HOOSE to git reddy 4 bedsleeps
Steph: 'what'd she say'
Richard Moneypenny: Wow.
You're a rude little shit.
I'm fucking talking to you.
Steph: Hold on, I'm posting on my Myspace.
Forrest: 'She said to give it to me so I can pass it off to her.'
Narrator : Her grandparents are asleep.
Steph: 'cool $$$penny is here'
Richard Moneypenny: Listen, de- fucking stop doing that.
Steph: I am listening.
Gabby is quiet as she goes about her bed routine so as not to disturb them
Richard Moneypenny: Deal or no deal?
Gabby:
Gabby grabs up her phone and texts Steph, why the frick not
Steph: I'll think about it.
Richard Moneypenny: Sure.
Richard Moneypenny vanishes into the night
Forrest: 'Who?'
Gabby: "HI ANY UPDATES?? SORRY I MISSED THE WHOLE FRICKING THING CUZ I GOT LOST"
Steph: Ugh.
'money penny'
...!
'did ken fill you in on things?'
Gabby: 'KEN TOLD ME ABOUT THE RUDDMAN STUFF YEAH. FRICKED UP IF YOU ASK ME. DID
YOU GUY'S FIND ANY JUICY DIRT?'
Forrest: 'Fill me on what.'
Richard Moneypenny: duff
Space: the dangers of two text conversations
Richard Moneypenny: that was not addressed to you
Mac D.: oh oop
Forrest: 'Who?"
Steph: 'not yet. they're pretty clean. he told you jaime got hit by a car also?'
'richard moneypenny??'
Forrest: 'Who?'
Gabby: !!!?!?
Steph goes for a little late-walk
Gabby: 'WHAIT WHAT THE FRICK IS HE OKAY OH MY GOD DID HE FRICKING DIE"
'?????'
'!?!?!'
Steph: 'the guy who pretended to be a doctor'
Forrest: 'Oh, him.'
Steph: 'hes ok he's in the hospital, did no one tell you?'
Gabby: 'NO I SAW A CAR WRECK OR SOME CRAP AND KEN DID'T KNOW. DID HE BREAK ANY B
ONE'S?? OH MY GOD'
Narrator : In the dark, deserted streets.
Steph hears a chuckle.
Steph: 'yeah him. did you not tell gabby that jaime got hit by a car?'
...?
Steph looks up from her phone
Forrest: "Oh, no.'
Mobile L fidgets as she awaits further text updates
Gabby no, me
Gabby: ...Ahhh, frick, frick, frick.
Narrator : A figure walks down the street, scraping something on the sidewalk
Steph: ...Uh... hello?
Gabby: ...God, I'm so sorry, Jaime...
Mac D.: FRIDAY
Space: it's her
Narrator : It hefts the axe in its hands.
Steph: ...
Steph turns and runs
Gabby:
...Frick, what's taking her...?
...Maybe she's with him...
Maybe she'll hand the phone to him... If... If his arms still work...
Ahhh God...
Narrator : She quickly escapes the figure.
Gabby fidgets and resumes taking off her socks
Forrest: .....
Steph texts Forrest hastily
Steph: 'axe killer'
Forrest wonders why steph isn't textForrest: .....?
'What?'
Steph looks over her shoulder
Gabby just kinda curls up on her bed
Steph ducks into an alley
(
18
)
= 18
The figure loses her.
Steph: ........
'there was someone following me'
'with an axe'
Forrest: ......
'Did you get a good look at him.'
Space: did shhe
Narrator : they were dressed in a thick coat
that's about it
Mobile L: WINTER IS COMING
Space: oh no
it's gabby
Gabby: "nyehehehehehe"
Steph quickly texts gabby as well
Steph: 'hes fine ok?'
-Forrest- 'it's like midnight'
Steph is afraid to exit the alley
Gabby: 'OKAY. THATS GOOD AT LEAST. DO THEY LET VISITOR'S IN? MAYBE I'LL GO SEE H
IM TOMORROW OR SOME CRAP'
Forrest: 'Did you see any defining features at all.'
Steph: 'they let me in and then kicked me out'
'they had this coat and an axe'
........
Forrest: 'What kind of coat.'
Gabby: 'OH WHAT. THAT FRICKING SUCKS :-('
Steph: 'i think they're still out there'
Gabby: 'FRICKING BUTTHOLES'
Steph stares at Gabby's text for a moment
Steph: ........
'don't go outside tonight'
Teddy Reinside: Hey!
Space: the truth
Gabby:
Space: is out there
Gabby: 'WAIT WHAT?? ARE YOU OKAY STEPH? WHATS' GOING ON?'
Steph: Aah!
Forrest: .......
Teddy Reinside: What're you doing in an Alley at midnight?
Forrest: 'Are you off the streets.''
Teddy Reinside: The Los Illumintos will find you...
Steph: T-there's... there was an axe murderer.
So.
Teddy Reinside: OH!
Forrest: ......
Teddy Reinside: It's one of their Silencers...
Listen...
You need to listen to me.
Where do you live?
Steph: It's, um... just near here.
Teddy Reinside: Get in this garbage can.
Don't worry, I emptied it.
Steph: ...
Steph looks in it
Teddy Reinside: I'm a professional.

Forrest: .....
Teddy Reinside has cleaned it out
Steph: .........
Steph gets in
Forrest wonders if she was axe murdered
Teddy Reinside begins rolling it on the street
Gabby:
Steph: -gabby- 'axe murderer'
Steph finds it hard to text while being rolled
Gabby: !!!
Teddy Reinside dumps her out
Gabby: 'WHAT THE FRRRRICK?????? OH MY GOD STEPH ARE YOU SAFE????? GET TO A BUILD
ING AND FRICKING GO INSIDE OKAY,'
Forrest: ....
Steph: --!
Gabby is just incredibly tense and is whimpering a little bit
Gabby: Ohhhh my God... Oh God... Steph...
...Ohhhhh frick. Oh frick. Oh frrrrriiiiiick...
Forrest: ..........
Space: gab no she's fine :c
Forrest you need support, gabby
Gabby:
Forrest a m e r i c a n support
Gabby FRICK that is right
Gabby TEXAS
Gabby TEXTAS TEXAS
Teddy Reinside: Now...
Remember...
Never let the Los Illuminatos see you with a cross.
Steph: U-uhm... okay.
Thanks.
Teddy Reinside: Sleep tight.
Gabby: 'OH MY GOD DID YOU HEAR ANY THING FROM STEPH??? SHE FRICKING TEXTED ME AB
OUT AXE MURDERERS AND NOW SHES SILENT AND I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO OH MY GOD'
Gabby d-don't cry, Gab...
Teddy Reinside grabs the can and puts it over his upper body
Teddy Reinside runs off
Steph: ...
Steph god bless him
Steph hurries inside her home
Steph locks and bolts the door
Ronald Karling is asleep

Steph: ...
Steph quietly tiptoes to her room
Forrest: ...
Gabby: ...T-Texas...? Did... W-was he also...?
...FRICKING...!
Forrest 's eyes hurt from the sudden blast of allcaps he was just hit with
Forrest: 'I heard.'
Steph locks her bedroom door as well
Steph: ...
...Oh, shit!
Gabby: !
Steph quickly checks her phone
Steph: -forrest- 'im home, teddy was there'
Gabby: 'OH THANK GOD YOUR OKAY HAVE YOU HEARD ANYTHING ELSE???????? I TRIED TEXT
ING STEPH ANS SHES JUST BEEN QUIET FOR LIKE A WHOLE FIVE MINUTES'
Steph and then, quickly, to gabby
Steph: 'im ok'
Gabby: !!!!!!
Gabby RRRRRELIEF
Forrest: 'Who?'
'I just got a text from her.'
Steph: 'do you just not know anybody's fucking names? jesus christ'
Gabby: 'OH MY GOD. OH GOD, YOUR OKAY!!!! :-D ARE YOU INSIDE PLEASE TELL ME YOUR
INSIDE'
'OH GOOD, OKAY SHE JUST TEXTED ME TOO. FRICKING H* I WAS SO FRICKING WORRIED THE
RE JUST NOW OH MY GOD'
Steph: 'i'm home i locked the doors and everytyhing'
'*everything'
Gabby: 'GOOD. GOOD KEEP THEM LOCKED.'
'GRANDMA AND GRANDPA ALWAYS LOCK IT UP HEAR SO ITS ALL GOOD WITH ME, BUT STAY IN
SIDE'
'I THOUGHT YOU WHERE DEAD'
Forrest: steph: 'Do you just expect me to know the name of every single person i
n this stupid town by default.'
'I've been here, what, three days?'
Steph: gab: 'sorry i had to get home fast'
forrest: 'you've met him??? conspiracy man???'
Forrest: 'Oh, him.'
Gabby: 'THAT'S OKAY AS LONG AS YOURE SAFE. :-) :-) :-)"
Forrest: gabby: 'You're inside, right.'
Steph: ':-)'
Gabby clearly learned texting from her grandma or something
Steph is not :-) at all
Forrest: steph: 'So does that mean you're inside.'
Steph is :-(
Forrest is <=
Steph: forrest: 'yes i'm inside. i hope i don't have to tell you not to go outsi
de ? don't go outside forrest'
Gabby: 'YES DONT WORRY I'M INSIDE. DOORS LOCKED AND EVERY THING.'
Forrest: steph: 'Oh golly gee and here I was about to mosey on out into the pour
ing rain with a psychotic killer on the loose.'
steph:
'At midnight.'
Steph: 'yeah i figured you'd do something like that'
Forrest: steph: 'I'm sure you find yourself very funny.'
gab: 'Good. Stay safe.'
Steph: 'it's how i cope with nearly getting murdered? because that's what almost
happened?'
Gabby: steph: 'OKAY, SERIOUSLY, THANK FRICK STEPH. PROBABLY HAVE A WATER OR SOME
THING BEFORE BED. I KNOW YOU HAD LIKE A FRICKING REALLY CLOSE CALL BUT GET AS MU
CH SLEEP AS YOU CAN OKAY?'
Forrest: steph: 'Do you also cope by being really catty and bitchy when I'm tryi
ng to have a conversation with you.'
Gabby: forrest: 'I WILL, THANK YOU :-)'
forrest: 'HOLD ON SORRY, I KEEP FORGETTING YOU'RE NAME. WHAT WAS IT AGAIN'
Steph: gab: 'i'll try. good night gaby'
Forrest: gab: 'It's Forrest.'
Gabby: 'GOOD NIGHT STEPH SEE YOU TOMMORROW'
'OH OK. THANK YOU FOREST. PLEASE ALSO STAY SAFE AND INSIDE. I BET YOURE PROBABLY
INSIDE BUT I'M ALL PARANOID AFTER WHAT JUST HAPPENED, HEHE'
Steph: forrest: 'no that's just normal. im going to bed'
...
Forrest: steph: 'I've noticed. Good night.'
Steph sets her phone aside
Steph and tries to sleep
Gabby:
Gabby frickin' embraces her phone as though it were a person in a rather sudden
display and cries just a little
Space: :C
Gabby: ...Friiiiick, you guyyyys...
Forrest: ........
gab: 'I'm inside, yes.'
Gabby: ...M-making me get all fricked up... Nyeheheh... Y-you dang dinguses...
Gabby takes off her glasses and hastily wipes the tears
Narrator : The day passes.
*Night
Forrest enjoys some dee-fuckin-licious canadian mac n chees
Gabby gnaws at a Pop Tart like a nervous hamster
Steph has pulled an all-nighter, unable to sleep
Narrator : It is now morning.
Today is Sunday, the day of Naomi's memorial Vigil.
Tomorrow, Douglas comes to town
Gabby ahhhh FRICK SON
Forrest wrenches himself violently from the peace of sleep into the cold madness
of life
Forrest: ......
Steph does not immediately realize this
Gabby god dang fricking no good butthole coming into town

Gabby ...oh... and naomi...
Gabby ...frick...
Forrest: .....
Steph rather, she just generally hates life as she pours herself a mug of coffee
Forrest quick double check. texts to both of them.
Gabby sighs and goes over to the closet to pick out an appropriately professiona
l and formal outfit for such a thing
Forrest: 'Are you dead.'
Ronald Karling leaves his room, fully dressed
Gabby: 'NO THANK FRICK HEHE!!!!'
Steph: 'i feel like it. rip me'
Forrest: 'Alright, good.'
Steph nods in tired greeting
Steph: Mrgh.
Gabby: 'YEAH. GOOD MORNING HOW ARE YOU'
Forrest: 'I just woke up.'
Forrest HOVES himself out of bed and into clothing, and HOVES himself out of his
room
Mobile L: Do you know Forrest's pain, Duff?
Mac D.: every day
Mobile L: :,)
Gabby: 'OH OK COOL. ARE WE GONNA MEAT UP TODAY OR WHAT?'
Gabby continues to rifle through her closet
Forrest: 'I have some things I need to work on today.'
Gabby: 'OH RIGHT THAT'S FINE. BEST OF LUCK AND STUFF'
Forrest: "If anything significant happens, let me know.'
Gabby: 'WILL DO FOR SURE'
Gabby eventually picks out something like this http://outfitideashq.com/wp-conte
nt/uploads/2015/05/easy-professional-outfit-ideas-8.jpg
Space: what a square
Gabby ah yes, professional, classy, and in appropriate mourning colors
Gabby CH-CH-CHANGES
Gabby: ...Mmmh... We're... We're gonna get it sorted out, Naomi...
...We are.
Gabby TEXTIES 4 STEPPPHHH

Gabby: 'GOOD MORNING ARE YOU STILL OK??'
Ronald Karling: The Vigil begins in twenty minutes.
Steph: ...Oh fuck.
Steph quickly downs the rest of the coffee
Lel Shitkid is already zooming around the house with Bryce
Loren Freeman is in uniform
Jasper Trn: Gabby!

Forrest greets them all
Steph hurries to put on something more respectable than Track Jacket
Space: i'm rolling for speed
Jasper Trn: Why have you put on such lovely clothing?
Space: rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} + 1
{{(
10
+
4
+
20
)}}+1
= 11
Forrest: I'm headed for the library. That okay?
Eunice Trn: You look like a little princess!
Gabby: ...Nyeheheh, well thanks. Um.
Loren Freeman: That should be fine.
Gabby looks kind of somber
Narrator : you know that comic
where the mother leaves the boy
and he rushes to the computer
Gabby: ...'S for a memorial vigil, actually, a... a classmate of mine.
Narrator : and types stupid shit in
that's what steph is
Steph NYOOM
Jasper Trn: Oh... I'm so sorry...
Steph checks her time before returning to the kitchen in Respectable Attire
Eunice Trn: Oh, if only we'd have known...
Jasper!
Jasper, get dressed!
Forrest: Okay....If you need me to run errands or anything, I'll have my phone.
Space: the perks of Stealing a Character for a faceclaim: https://40.media.tumbl
r.com/tumblr_magccsQNv31qawftko1_400.png
Gabby: ...O-oh, Grandma...
Ronald Karling: Good- ten minutes to spare.
Gabby is both touched and concerned at her grandparents' willingness to partake
Loren Freeman: That shouldn't be necessary.
Love you, Forrest.
Loren Freeman kisses him on the forehead
Forrest: ........
Forrest they don't even trust you enough to RUN ERRANDS....
Gabby: (...I'll have to leave my bookbag and Atlas Shrugged at home... Ahhh fric
k. If something goes weird, and... and they're...)
Loren Freeman quicly heads out
Forrest: ........okay...love you tSteph: Great. This'll be great.
Forrest sees her ollie out
Jasper Trn is getting dressed
Forrest: ....
Eunice Trn is putting on her makeup
Forrest: ......
Ronald Karling: We should get there early.
Forrest quietly excuses himself to WALK THE STREETS
Gabby: ...Thanks, Grandma and Grandpa. Um... Sorry for not telling you sooner. I
... I didn't wanna bug you guys or anything.
Forrest his forrestface just a little bit forrestier
Steph: I'm as ready as I'll ever be.
Gabby does a quick check in the mirror to make sure she doesn't have a stealth n
ose zit or anything
Mobile L: happy family
I'm still pleased with how they look like they could be related
no...
Space: him
her... :c
Mobile L: http://static.giantbomb.com/uploads/original/9/93998/2698338-2014-11-0
3_00002.jpg
Narrator : Forrest is headed off on the way to the Library but the massive fucki
ng crowd.
The Memorial Vigil
Forrest: .....
Forrest oh yeah right the Vigil
Forrest: ......
Narrator : Gabby and Steph both enter into the crowd
Forrest das a big turnout
Narrator : Oh look, Forrest.
Your mother, in full uniform.
Forrest: ......
Gabby:
Forrest does not want to get in the way of her work
Steph is dreading this
Gabby sticks closely to her grandparents, silently eyeing the crowd
Forrest looks at the slab of crowd in front of him
Victor Sherrings , Mayor of Belmont
Victor Sherrings speaks into a microphone
Victor Sherrings: Concerned individuals...
Family.
Friends.
We gather here, today, to show solidarity
For the lost, for the many young people who have vanished as of late.
The most recent of which is Naomi Way, a girl of fifteen years of age.
Victor Sherrings: She was, and is a dearly beloved part of the Belmont Private S
chool, and a good daughter.
Steph: ...
Gabby:
Victor Sherrings: With me, I have her mother, Lucille Way, who will speak a few
words.
no getting past the crowd, forrest

Forrest fukken SHIIIET
Lucille Way stands up to the podium
Lucille Way: ...
... I miss my daughter.
Lucille Way steps away from it, silent
Victor Sherrings: .. Yes.
Mac D.: hardcore as ever
Steph: ......
Gabby:
Gabby ...frick... ah god...
Victor Sherrings: The ongoing investigation into these disappearances, headed by
Officer Phillip Quest, are still finding new evidence every day.
Forrest: ..........
Victor Sherrings: I am certain we will find them in no time.
Gabby:
Victor Sherrings: I encourage each and every one of you here to help the police
however you can in this matter.
Steph looks down, despondent
Victor Sherrings: And we will now accept questions and anecdotes from the crowd.
Gabby slightly leans into her grandfather's shoulder, trying to keep as close to
the both of them as possinle
Steph: ......
Forrest: ......
Gabby: *possible
Forrest is watching the crowd
Ronald Karling puts his hand on Steph's shoulder
Jasper Trn: ...
Victor Sherrings: ...
Victor Sherrings is clearly startled by the lack of testamonies
Gabby ...ahhh frick...
Steph: rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} + -1
{{(
5
+
9
+
4
)}}+-1
= 4
Victor Sherrings it's almost as if she did nothing of any use and had no real fr
iends
Victor Sherrings: ...
Gabby to remain silent and keep a low profile... or to pay respects...
Gabby:
Gabby GOD FRICKING DANG IT
Steph covers her mouth with her hand, tearing up

Gabby slowly rises
Gabby: ...Uh...
Gabby instantly regrets this
Mac D.: she is immediately shot
Victor Sherrings: Ah, come up to the podium!
Gabby:
Victor Sherrings gestures to the microphone
Gabby nods slightly and steps up, internally cursing her impulsiveness
Gabby:
Forrest: .....
Ronald Karling stands by Steph's side
Forrest is looking for an OPENING....!
Ronald Karling: there are none forrest
you are going to have to wait this vigil out
Gabby: ...I... I'm sorry, first of all... Uhh... I... There's nothing really I c
an say to... to...
Forrest shit...!
Gabby swallows thickly
Steph wipes her eyes, trying not to cry in front of her grandfather
Steph listens to Gabby speak
Gabby: ...I... only knew Naomi for... a-a little bit before she disappeared, but
she...
Forrest steps out of the alley onto the empty street, standing at a curb
Gabby: ...E-even though... even though we didn't really talk that much, she... s
he reached out to me and...
Gabby d-don't cry, god dang it...
Gabby: ...t-treated me like... like we were best friends... She was so warm, and
... and... l-loving...
Narrator : Forrest can hear the talking from his street
Gabby hhhhhhh stop the tears, it's not your place...
Space: i move upstairs
Forrest: ....
Gabby: ...She... I... I hope... she gets found, um... s-soon and...
Gabby starts to sniffle and cuts it off there before she fricks this up any wors
e
Liz Rubik : What're you doing here.
Forrest: ....?
Forrest notice Liz
Mr. Hawthorne waddles his fat ass to the podium
Forrest: ....
....I'm waiting fo the crowd to disperse.
Mr. Hawthorne: Now... listen here...
I first met Naomi when she was no taller than this podium.
Gabby wipes the tears aggressively with her sleeves, trying very hard not to los
e composure any further
Mr. Hawthorne: She was young, and just a little grade 4 student.
But I saw that she was full of life- and I made it a point to assure that she wa
s looked after and that her needs were... accomodated.
Liz Rubik : You're a Belmont kid, you should be with them.
Mr. Hawthorne: A-and I did adore that child.
Gabby:
Forrest: .....I'm not. I only just arrived here recently.
Mr. Hawthorne: She was kindly and honest, and she always worked to do her duties
.
Forrest: I never knew the girl, she died before I came here.
Mr. Hawthorne: And I-I speak for all of the staff of Belmont that...
We do miss her, and every moment that she is gone is unbearable.
Gabby just struggles quietly to hold back the water works
Liz Rubik : Died, huh?
Little pessimistic.
Forrest: ......
....What's that supposed to mean.
Mr. Hawthorne: ... Among other things- she was a fantastic artist, a loyal frien
d, a good writer...
Gabby:
Mr. Hawthorne: And not a mean bone in her...
Children like Naomi are rare- they only come once and a while.
Mr. Hawthorne pets Theodore, solemn
Gabby sniffles quietly, her glasses' lenses starting to fog up
Space: bac
Liz Rubik : They haven't found a body.
Steph has been trying to compose herself
Forrest: Are you implying you think she's still alive.
Liz Rubik : No proof that she ain't, that's all I'm saying.
Officer Quest walks up to the podium
Officer Quest back stiff as a board
Gabby 's heart sinks
Forrest: .....Is that why you're not attending the Vigil.
Officer Quest is just incredibly awkward looking
Officer Quest: ...
Officer Quest adjusts the mic
Officer Quest: We...
Will find her.
I promise you.
Gabby:
Steph: ...
Officer Quest: I will stop at nothing until these children are safe and these di
sappearances stop.
Gabby: (...Bull fricking crap.)
Steph steels herself, upon hearing this
Officer Quest: ... The fact that this has occurred in the first place is a monum
ental failure on my part.
Officer Quest takes off his hat

Officer Quest: I am sorry.
Steph: ...(He knows. He has to.)
Gabby reminds herself to remain somber and not scowl
Liz Rubik : Is that what you're not?
Officer Quest: ... Thank you for your time.
Officer Quest hastily gets out of the limelight
Forrest: No, I told you why.
Gabby:
Liz Rubik : And I told you I don't think she's dead.
There's no proof.
Lucille Way steps back up
Forrest: ....Alright, then. Do you plan on pursuing that further.
Lucille Way: When she was thirteen.
She nearly ran away after her father left.
Gabby:
Steph: ...
Steph looks up at Lucille
Lucille Way: I stopped her- and I told her that it would be alright, and that sh
e and I were in this life together.
And that as long as I lived I wouldn't let her go.
Gabby: ..........
Lucille Way: ...
Lucille Way walks away
Gabby has tears just start streaming down her cheeks
Gabby: ...........
Liz Rubik : There's nothing I can do.
Victor Sherrings adjusts his tie, speaing
Steph is hit with the realization
Steph that this, all of this here, that's her fault
Victor Sherrings: ... That will be it, for the part of the Vigil I will conduct.
Steph: ....
Victor Sherrings: I invite you all to stay a while and speak and such.
Forrest: I see. Shame, that.
Victor Sherrings: Good day, and may all our hearts be with Naomi and the other l
ost children.
Gabby tries to keep her sniffles quiet
Victor Sherrings begins wheeling the podium away
Gabby weeps very quietly
Narrator : The crowd thins somehwat
Steph swallows thickly
Steph feels that she has to stay here until the end of it
Gabby tries very hard to stop crying
Mac D.: gentlemen this has been great but i do have to go to work at 11:00 tomor
row
go on.....without me
Liz Rubik : Path's opened up.
go stupid
Space: rip duff
Narrator : People talk about the tragedy of it all.
Steph: ...
Narrator : A bunch of nerds start performing shitty music
Mobile L: I can only go about 20 more minutes myself
Gabby:
Steph goes off into the crowd, looking for someone who knows what really happene
d
Gabby just silently sits and listens, too ashamed to listen
Narrator : A fucking godawful rendition of Amazing Grace
Gabby: *speak
Steph would rather quietly bear this with someone who knows what she knows
Gabby arrrghhh FRICK
Narrator : well there's ken, suzie, nathan
Gabby and me
Narrator : lilly
Space: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Unrp8oAEfdk
Steph: ...
Steph heads to Suzie
Suzie is very well-dressed
Suzie: ...
Steph just has the most hopeless look on her
Steph: ... This is horrible.
Gabby looks to her grandparents for moral support, and also out of concern becau
se ahahaha she kinda accidentally made them sit through this
Suzie: At least people are talking it out.
It's worst to stay silent.
Jasper Trn and Eunice hug Gabby
Steph: There's some things you can't talk about. You just can't.
Gabby:
Gabby hugs them back, very tightly, and cries gently into Grandma's ample should
er
Jasper Trn: You have to.
fuck
Suzie: You have to.
Gabby: i know grandpa, tears are necessary... :,c
Eunice Trn: There, there...
It's okay, Gabriella...
Gabby weakly nods, still a sniffling mess, trying and failing and trying again t
o get her composure
Steph: But when it's...
...
Eunice Trn: That is when you must talk about it.
edrdf
xr
gf
fuck me
Gabby: grandma no
Eunice Trn: fucking stop crying you little shit
Space: grandma ru ok
Gabby: ;A;
Jasper Trn: ... Do you want to go home...?
Gabby:
Suzie: That is when you must talk about it.
Gabby looks out into the crowd, noting Quest's continued presence
Gabby:
Steph: ... Okay. Let's talk about it.
Suzie: I'm all ears.
Gabby nods again, not really in a place where she can cause the words to happen
so well
Jasper Trn begins leading the way home
Gabby holds her grandfather's hand like a small child
Steph: ...She was always just... I never payed any attention to her. You know? E
xcept for a few days before...
Steph shakes her head
Steph: She was just... one of those faces in the crowd. But then we got to talki
ng, and... she was really nice, you know? A really good, genuine person.
Mobile L: I think now is probably a good place for me to hit the hay, y'awl
I hope you enjoyed your nightly dose of Gabby crying
Jasper Trn: i did
Mobile L: c:
A'ight, you can keep going, but I will sleep
G'night, guys
Space: goode nite mob
Suzie nods
Steph: That's what gets me. That's what it has to be. Because she didn't deserve
it. Or... no. Nobody deserves that, but she deserved it the least.
Suzie nods
Steph: ...It's horrible. It's just... it's just awful.
Steph shakes her head
Suzie: That's just how it is.
Steph: It shouldn't be.
Suzie: It shouldn't be.
Steph: ...I think that I'm going to go home. I'll see you around.
Suzie: Bye.
Steph: Yeah.
Steph heads back to her home, downtrodden
Space: there we go
Gabby: [cries in Vietnamese]
Steph: [sobs in canadien]\
eldritch s. (GM): duff
Mac D.: yes seer
Forrest: [grunts in American]
Mac D.: what happened when i turned in early last time
eldritch s. (GM): you can scroll up and read all that occured, legit
Mac D.: i just did and i still want you to tell me anyway
eldritch s. (GM): why
Mac D.: because i asked nicely you syrup-chugging prick
eldritch s. (GM): incentivize me
Space: the bells of st clemens
Narrator : The day passes without further incident, and a new one begins.
hold for mobile
i wonder
what
Steph: glad to see you're feeling ok jaime
Narrator : the
hell
happened
to her
Forrest: wow i can't believe absolutely nothing happened to me yesterday after t
he vigil i am just blown the fuk away
Narrator : Steph and Gab cried.
Forrest: nobody was at the LIBRARY i didn't find any BOOKS it was just unreal
Narrator : The library was rented out for an event.
Forrest: i guess i just played video games the whole day again like i do when i
don't have mysteries to solve like scooby god damn do
Space: he got the gold camo for the knife in black ops
Forrest: like i would play fuckin cawadooty
i play weeb shit
and Nipples The Enchilada And The Secret Rings
Narrator : https://soundcloud.com/hooplakidz/oranges-and-lemons-nursery
Steph: hows the new love live game forreset
Forrest: better than the shit you play
Space: this is the same version as youtube thats creepy
Forrest: what do you play, Assassin's Creed
Narrator : i know
Steph: my old gamecube still works fine fucker
you'll never beat me at mario cart
Forrest: just how poor IS your family
Steph: unlike you
i have better things to do with my time than play video games
Forrest: like what
laugh at people who actually have to work for a living
Steph: when's the last time you have opened a book
Forrest: we read one two days ago together holy shit
lay off the weed
Steph: for fun
for enjoyment
Forrest: we GET it, you VAPE
Steph: is vaping legal in canada
Mobile L: Hoooogh, I'm here. Sorry, got called away for a sec
Might or might happen again
Gabby dreads the FRICK out of today
Forrest: ...
Steph is trying, and more or less succeeding, at getting herself back together l
ike nothings happened
Forrest is the same fucking piece of shit he always is, with not even a tear sta
in on his face
Gabby is in her usual school uniform, but has opted to trade her usual tie for t
hat necklace she wore to the vigil, along with a bracelet
Mobile L: I am so sorry, evidently in rearranging the cars, I must have hit and
killed Eldy
Space: it's time for a coup d'etat
i'm the general now
Mobile L: Requiesce in pace.
Narrator : vaping is legal i think...?
Gabby vapes in ya face
Space: ah sorry he was just spending his time browsing the canadian legal code
Narrator : right so the policy is
no indoor use
no sale to minors
that's bc
Steph: fug
Narrator : it varies by province
ontario is trying to just ban them altogether
Mobile L: Good, vaping is for douches
Ms. Lachance rubs her temple
Ms. Lachance: .... Alright...
Gabby fricking... sorrow... and DAAAAAAAD...!
Gabby dad. dad. dadddd. DADDDDDD.
Ms. Lachance: As I'm sure you're all aware- Basketball recrForrest: .....
Martin Witherburg: That's quite enough of that!
Gabby DAD DAD DAD DAD DA
Steph: ...?
Gabby: ????
Forrest looks over and who's THIS fat fuck
Martin Witherburg: Children- young, Christian soldiers!
Gabby oh frick it's Sir Topham Hat
Martin Witherburg: Hail Brittania, God save the Queen!
Gabby OH FRICK IT'S SIR TOPHAM HAT
Martin Witherburg: I'm here today, on behalf of the school, to draft young bodie
s like yourselves!
Steph is not entirely sure if this man is for real
Martin Witherburg: War's on, and all that!
Gabby: ...Um.
Forrest: .....A war.
Martin Witherburg puffs on his fucking cigar
Gabby: ...Uhhhhm.
Martin Witherburg: Yes! Basketball, my boy!
Gabby: ???
Forrest: .....
Martin Witherburg: Can't let those buggers beat us, can we?
Alright- first thing- who will volunteer to fight? Eh? Raise your hands!
Forrest: .....
Forrest hahaha sports fuck THAT
Steph looks around
Steph raises her hand
Martin Witherburg: Ah, I should mention...

Forrest: ...
Martin Witherburg: Participating will immediately add bonus marks to all of your
courses- five percent!
Forrest: ....What.
Ms. Lachance chugs
Gabby:
Narrator : Vlad, Anton, Suzie, Jason, Lilly and Nathan all raise their hands in
a frenzied rampage
Gabby on one hand... sports is dumb and boring...
Forrest: ...That can't be allowed. That's absurd.
Gabby on the OOOOTHER hand... EXTRA POOOOINTS...!
Steph: What, that's not how it works in America?
Gabby:
Gabby conflictedly raises her hand
Forrest: No, you do not get better grades in math because you are good at throwi
ng a ball through a hoop.
Martin Witherburg: Get off of me, you little devils!
Forrest keeps that hand steadfastly un-raised
Martin Witherburg swat them off
Steph: Wow, that's weird.
...Oh, you're signing up, Gab?
Martin Witherburg: I was lying!
Forrest: ....
.....I knew it.
Martin Witherburg: You're all a pack of pissabed nun-fanciers!
Since none of you are honest enough to volunteer on your own, I'll read this dra
ft list!
Martin Witherburg clears his throat
Forrest: .....Wait- people are being forced to play.
Martin Witherburg: Karloman, Stephanie.
Steph: ...
Steph smirks
Martin Witherburg: Kis, Vladimir.
Pyrce, Nathan.
Steph: (Pls let it be forrest next...)
Martin Witherburg: Freeman, Forrest.
Forrest: .....
....You've got to be kidding me.
Martin Witherburg: Tran, Gabby.
Steph grins now
Martin Witherburg: Thorn, Lilly.
Forrest: You have got.
Martin Witherburg: And- oh, this one is all crossed off... what became of Jaime
Lancaster...?
Forrest: To be kidding me.
Steph: ...Uh - he's in the hospital.
Martin Witherburg: Ah, very well.
Forrest: This is criminal. This has to be a crime of some kind.
Martin Witherburg: Hm...
Steph: Holy shit, is physical activity criminal in America??
Gabby:
Martin Witherburg: Pah, I'll take this one, too.
Martin Witherburg sends Suzie up
Martin Witherburg: Good children1
Gabby is starting to have her stereotypes about Murrica reaffirmed
Martin Witherburg: You are my soldiers!
Gabby: ...Yeah, might as well, right?
I mean.
Martin Witherburg: Our team, in years past, have been called the Shaggy Beavers!
Forrest: It's a crime to force me to play some stupid sport.
Gabby: They say physical activity is good for your br
Martin Witherburg: And you shall be also!
Gabby: ????
Steph: Basketball's the least stupid sport, shut up. You know it was invented by
a Canadian?
Forrest: ....Oh, absolutely not.
Martin Witherburg puffs on his cigar
Forrest: I refuse.
Gabby: ...Uhm. Shaggy... Beavers...?
Martin Witherburg: You want to argue, boy?
Forrest: Yes.
Martin Witherburg: Come on then.
Make a suggestion.
Steph looks expectantly at Forrest
Forrest: That's simple.
Gabby is just silently glad Ken didn't get drafted
Forrest: Find someone else, because I'm not doing this.
Martin Witherburg: Absolutely not.
Gabby you'd better not smoke that fricking thing too close to Ken you frick...
Forrest: What's going to happen if I don't play. Will the police arrest me.
Martin Witherburg: Says here you'll be sent Dr. Hall's office every day for the
rest of the school year for an hour after school.
Forrest: ......
...Do it, then.
Martin Witherburg: Alright!
Capital, capital, let me fetch him!
Steph: ...
Forrest is the most righteously indignant you have ever seen him look
Gabby ohhh my GOD forrest you lazy american
Gabby oh my GODDDD
Gabby scowls at Hall on principle
Gabby: >8(
Steph does not really see this ending well at all
Space: haven't heard this song in a while
Dr. Hall: So what exactly seems to be the... problem, here?
I was under the impression that children were quite enraptured with games.
Forrest: I don't care for basketball.
And I don't care for being forced to play it.
Dr. Hall: I can respect that, Forrest, you're a man after my own heart.
You like what you like- and you like it your way.
But, Forrest, we're both... intellectual people, aren't we?
Life doesn't always turn out the way we want it.
Gabby:
Forrest: Clearly not.
Steph is really dead quiet
Dr. Hall: I, myself, could do with losing a few pounds- but it doesn't turn out.
Forrest: ......Oh, wow, right to the heart.
Gabby oh my GOD DR HALL YOU FRICK
Dr. Hall: I don't understand whatever do you mean.
Gabby i will end you...
Gabby AAAAAGH SO CONFLICTED, WHO TO BE ANGRY AT AND WHY
Gabby:
Forrest: Look, if I have to take the punishment of sitting in your office for an
hour every day as opposed to being drafted into a stupid sport, then I'll take
it.
Dr. Hall: Oh, excGabby sighs and decides she will inevitably take it all out on her Dad
Martin Witherburg: That won't be necessary.
Martin Witherburg blows smoke in Hall's face
Forrest: ......?
Gabby:
Forrest looks at Martin
Gabby AHAHAHAHAHA SWEET
Martin Witherburg: He's just having a laugh.
A wee giggle.
Come on, back to the office with you.
Gabby this is a frickin' trainwreck oh my GOD
Martin Witherburg: Lots of children for you to talk with about their mothers and
all that.
Dr. Hall: ButSteph: .....
Steph respects Witherburg SO MUCH
Gabby GET FRICKED AHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
Martin Witherburg: Good day, doctor!
Gabby ahhhhhh...
Forrest: ...
Martin Witherburg leans right into Forrest
Martin Witherburg: Let me be perfectly clear with you.
I do not trust that man around grown adult, let alone children.
I do not care if you would rather spend the time with him, I would rather you no
t.
You will be in this bloody sport, and that, my boy, is final.
Forrest remains stonefaced, looking at Martin
Forrest: ....And what if I still refuse.
Martin Witherburg: Then you're an imbecile and I can't help you.
Forrest: Then I guess that's that.

Steph: Forrest, c'mon.
Gabby g a h...
Martin Witherburg puffs on his cigar
Martin Witherburg: I'll be seeing you after school, in the gymnasium.
Gabby is reddy 2 dunk 4 stickin' it 2 hall, AWWW YEH FRICKERS
Ms. Lachance: Sit down, already, Christ!
Steph: ...!
Forrest walks back to his desk
Steph hurries back to her seat
Gabby SSSSIT
Ms. Lachance slams back another mug
Ms. Lachance: Now, with that disaster out of the way...
The Clubs are recruiting.
Some of you are already in them.
Forrest: ....
Ms. Lachance: Some don't know.
But they need at least three more members to be allowed to stick around
So they're going to come for you.
Gabby half-wonders if one of them is the youth division of the Snake Frickers
Steph: ...
Steph at least three...
Ms. Lachance: Now, wiMs. Lachance puts her finger against her temple
Ms. Lachance: Son of a bitch...
Forrest: ......
Ms. Lachance: ... With that disaster out of the way...
We're doing a free-writing exercise.
You have this entire class to do as you wish.
Gabby:
Ms. Lachance: As long as, by the end, I get an original story on my desk.
Gabby has a slow grin spread across her face
Steph gets to her notebook
Forrest: ......
Forrest his worst nemesis.......CREATIVE writing...........
Gabby grabs up her PENCIL and PAPER
Steph her favorite part of class...
Gabby this story... will be... about a man named DOUGLAS...!
Gabby WHO SUCKS
Forrest gets out a pencil and paper and has a moment to try and come up with an
original story idea
(
7
+
16
+
4
)+1
= 28
Mobile L: Twilight
Narrator : A man, with such fantastic nipples, he must rub them in public.
... Wait...
Perhaps...
Mobile L: Write the full text of this nipple story and I will do a reading in Fo
rrest's voice
Narrator : A girl...
And she...
A vampire...
Who spark- no, wait, that's Twilight.
Try the nipple one.
Forrest can't just copy the story of Nipples The Enchilada and Dracula's Curse
Forrest: .....
Steph writes about a man named Isaac who OD's on methadone in a Thunder Bay mote
l
Forrest begins to put to pen the story of Nipples Nipplini, Italian Mob King wit
h a horrible nipple-touching addiction
Narrator : roll for quality
(
10
+
1
+
10
)+1
= 22
{{(
4
+
18
+
17
)}}+1
= 18
Gabby just tries for the most colorful account of Douglas' life and how badly it
sucks that she can muster
Space: nice B))))
Gabby: rolling 3d20 + 1
(
2
+
4
+
19
)+1
= 26
Narrator : Gabby's story is just... dark, and spiteful.

Gabby: [demented kindergartener scrawlings]
Narrator : With clear contempt and unresolved issues boiling beneath the surface
.
Gabby is blinded by her own hubris and sees nothing wrong with it
Narrator : Forrest's story of chilling Nipple-Touching is acceptable.
Steph's story is like taking the methadone and dying.
Steph 'perfect,' she thinks
Narrator : They then hand them into Ms. Lachance
Forrest: ...
Ms. Lachance: Alright, let's go through...
Ms. Lachance speed-reads
Gabby is still coming down from the hate high
Gabby frickin' gremlin face
Steph knows that the most important part is... is writing for her OWN approval
Ms. Lachance: Forrest, you're a genius - A minues.
*minus
Forrest no expression
Steph deeply hopes that lachance loves hers
Ms. Lachance: Steph - A plus.
Mobile L: lachance like the nip
and the methadone
Ms. Lachance: Lilly - B.
Steph smiles genuinely
Ms. Lachance: Jasper - A plus.
Ken - B plus.
Suzie - A minus.
Gabby nyeheheheheh, get to mine, FEEL MY HATRED
Ms. Lachance: Jason - B plus.
Mac D.: gabby is assigned an appointment with dr. hall
Ms. Lachance: Gabb-...
Space: fuckin amazing
Ms. Lachance: ... Soft... manparts...
Space: fuckin amazing
Ms. Lachance: ... Pathetic...
Steph: ...?
Ms. Lachance: ... Fat...
Loser...
... hopeless...
... dirty...
Gabby:
Steph: ........
Forrest perks up like "is someone mentioning me"
Ms. Lachance looks right at it
Steph looks back at Gabby
Gabby uhhhh... i... i did write that, didn't i...?
Ms. Lachance: ... B minus,

Gabby oooooh... um, frick...
Ms. Lachance sets it down
Gabby creeping shame
Ms. Lachance: Nathan - C plus.
Vlad - D.
Anton - B minus.
Gabby creeeeeeping shame
Ms. Lachance: All in all, not too bad.
The system works.
Steph chooses to say nothing
Ms. Lachance: Oh- oh, remember: Semi-colons are your friend.
Steph this is an awkward moment to be near gabby
Ms. Lachance: AMs. Lachance puts her hand to her temple
Ms. Lachance: Frrrrrrrrrrrrgh..
Gabby ...aahhhhhh FRICK FRICK FRICK FRICK
Forrest: ......
....Ms. Lachance, are you alright.
Steph: ...
Gabby HE HAS WORMED INTO MY MIND...! HE... HE HAS CONTROL OVER ME, JUST AS THEY
SAID...!
Steph maybe Ms. Lachance needs methadone
Ms. Lachance: Oh, just PEACHY!
Gabby GAH! GAH! GAH! GAH! GAH! GAH!
Gabby SHAME. ANGER. SHAMEGER...!
Ms. Lachance: It feels like a jackhammer in my brain, agh...!
Gabby FFFFFFF RRRRRR IIIIIII CCCCCC KKKK
Forrest: .....
Steph: ...Do you, uh... need someone to go get the nurse?
Gabby is so wrapped up in her own inner turmoil that she completely misses Lacha
nce having a ministroke
Ms. Lachance: Fuck it, I'll be fine!
Ms. Lachance reaches into her desk and grabs a bottle of Asprin
Forrest: ...It sounds like you're in serious pain.
Ms. Lachance ingests the pills
Forrest: Maybe we should get the...
Ms. Lachance: I don't need that fucking chump...
Gabby GGGGHHHHHHHHHRRRGHHHHH...!
Gabby:
Gabby ssssssigh...
Gabby buries her angry little head in her hands

Steph: ...
Steph it's become awkward from two fronts
Steph we're outflanked
Gabby is very clearly and visibly troubled by some external thing
Lilly: ...
Are you alright, Gabby?
Forrest: ......
Gabby: ...Ghh...! Yeah, uh... Sure.
Gabby SSSSTOICISM C'MOOOOON!
Gabby deep breffs
Steph: .........
Forrest: ....
Lilly: ... If there's something wrong, be sure to tell me.
Forrest eyes the clock
Gabby: ...Right, uh... Yeah. 'Course.
Narrator : The bells goes the second he looks.
Steph oh thank god
Steph MOVE TO NEXT CLASS
Forrest ah HAH
Forrest: .....
Forrest sticks around in the classroom
Narrator : the general student mass leaves
Forrest: ...Ms. Lachance, do you have another class coming in this period.
Ms. Lachance: unless the other pcs would liek to stay
Yes.
Gabby emotionally intense hall-walking
Steph wants to get OUTTA there
Forrest shit...
Forrest: ...I see...I'll ask later, then.
Steph clutches her notebook closely as she walk
Mobile L: Forrest is a kind soul
Ms. Lachance: Talk to me at lunch.
Forrest nods
Forrest: I will. I hope your headache lets up.
Ms. Lachance: So do I.
Forrest exits the classroom
Forrest adds speaking to Lachance on his list, right next to righteously confron
ting Hawthorne on this tyrannical basketball policy
Narrator : They beat the teacher here, the one who is named Mr. Hawthorne
Gabby happy thoughts... calming thoughts... relaxing thoughts...
Forrest WELL HOWDY DIDDLY DOO MISTER FASCISM

Steph ok.... ok time to learn about health. ok.
Gabby 'm calm... 'm fine...
Gabby 'm okay...
Mr. Hawthorne: Well howdy diddly doo, children!
Forrest has no love in his heart....for tyrants
Mr. Hawthorne strokes Theodore
Forrest THE SLAVE BIRD
Mr. Hawthorne: We've finally fixed the problems with out textbooks!
Gabby good...
Mr. Hawthorne lets Theodore run wild in the classroom while he speaks
Mr. Hawthorne: Now, remember.
Gabby scrawls a demented Chopin in her notebook to try and destress herself
Mr. Hawthorne: Sexual Education is a very serious, sophisticated matter.
Steph watches Theodore do his stuff
Mr. Hawthorne: And there will be no foolishnes and funny business!
The first one to laugh or make a stupid comment will leave the class.
Forrest watches the chicken go berserk
Mr. Hawthorne: And, with that established.
Let us proceed.
Mr. Hawthorne hands out the textbooks
Mr. Hawthorne sits down
Mr. Hawthorne opens his up
Mr. Hawthorne: Ahem...
What is happening to Ellie?
Forrest: .......
Gabby opens hers up as well
Forrest so this is it
Gabby has no idea
Forrest this is what the tides of destiny look like
Mr. Hawthorne: http://krainaksiazek.pl/9781849055260_whats_happening_to_ellie_a_
book_about_puberty_for_girls_and_young_women_with_autism_and_related_conditions.
jpg
Now, Ellie...
Steph goes to look at her book, only reluctantly tearing her gaze away from Theo
dore
Mr. Hawthorne: She sometimes feels these... urges.
Gabby wh-... is... is this profiling...

Mr. Hawthorne: To touch herself in i- What?
Gabby: ...Uhhhhm.
Steph: .....................................
Mr. Hawthorne: Inappropriately.
In - public places...?
Forrest is watching what Theodore does
Mr. Hawthorne: The devil...?
Steph: .........................................................................
..................................................
Theodore: cuck cuck
Steph so
Steph this is how it's going to be
Gabby just slowly turns to Steph like "whaaaat the frick"
Mr. Hawthorne: W-well....
Mr. Hawthorne mops his head
Mr. Hawthorne: The solution!
The solution, children!
Is to..
to
Gabby:
Mr. Hawthorne: make Ellie
A scrapbook...
Of...
Steph widens her eyes at Gabby in agreement
Mr. Hawthorne: T-things...
...
Mr. Hawthorne looks at the cover
Gabby: ...A... scrapbook...?
Mr. Hawthorne: Autism and autism related CONDITIOSN!?!
Space: gabby nervously pushes her scrapbook further into her backpack
Forrest: .......Mister Hawthorne.
Mr. Hawthorne looks
Mr. Hawthorne: Yes,
Gabby: (...I... I'd
Forrest: I'm trying
up, mopping his head

old sport?
never do THAT in public, what the fricking)
to play close attention, but your cock is very distracting.
Gabby AAAAAAAAAAAA
Mr. Hawthorne: M-m-my *WHAT!?
Forrest: Your rooster.
Mr. Hawthorne quickly looks down before hearing rooster
Mr. Hawthorne: .. Oh.
Steph: ...!!!
Steph covers her mouth
Mr. Hawthorne: Theodore, come here, old sport!
Gabby:
Mr. Hawthorne extends his arm, which Theodore lands on
Mr. Hawthorne pets him
Mr. Hawthorne: ... Well, eh..

Gabby 's eye twitches uncontrollably
Mr. Hawthorne: We...
Forrest watches him stroke his cock
Mr. Hawthorne: These textbooks are not applicable!
So we will have to...
Move on.
... Religion!
Gabby: (...Did... Did DAD ever do any of...?)
Gabby ohhh lord

Mr. Hawthorne: It is the basis of philosophy and society!
Well, as we know it.
Steph OH my god
Steph at least... at least there's no way this can turn into sexual innuendo
Mr. Hawthorne: Islam, Catholicism, Protestantism, Buddhism, Hinduism, Sikhism, C
onfucianism...
Shintoism...
It's all very grand, and I'm sure you all have spiritual questions.
And I'm here to answer them, or- help you answer some of them.
So, we'll have you all submit a question to this hat, and discuss them as a clas
s.
Mr. Hawthorne holds out a hat
Mr. Hawthorne: All of you, take a blank piece of paper, and write the question.
And then place it in.
Steph immediately knows what she's going to ask
Steph tears out a sheet of paper and begins writing
Gabby:
Gabby sighs deeply and writes one down herself
Forrest tries to think of a completely innocent and non-suggestive question to a
sk
(
4
+
3
+
9
)+1
= 17
Mr. Hawthorne: make up your own question
Space: time for the civil war
(To eldritch s.): "If youre raised buddhist but you decide your an atheist inste
ad does it count? because in buddhism there isnt' any god, but theres like reinc
arnation and stuff"
Mr. Hawthorne eventually recieves all the questions, takes one out
Mac D.: help me come up with a sexual innuendo in the form of a religious questi
on
(To eldritch s.): will God forgive me if I haven't prayed sense 2005
Space: the only thing that comes to mind is somehting about catholic priests and
small children
but thats the lowest fruit that eevr did hang
Mr. Hawthorne: ... If you are raised a Buddhist but you decide you are an atheis
t instead, does it count? Because in Buddhism there isn't any God, but there's l
ike reincarnation and stuff.
(To Mac D.): sometimes i have trouble letting jesus come inside me, how can i fe
el it more
Mr. Hawthorne: Well, I don't know, what do you all think of it?
Steph: Well... do they still do Buddhist things?
Gabby:
Mac D.: GOT IT
Mr. Hawthorne: Let us assume they do.
Steph: Then, I mean, I'd imagine it counts?
Steph is pretty 100% sure who wrote that
Mr. Hawthorne takes one out
Steph unless anton is a hungarian buddhist
Gabby ahhhh, being the only asian kid, THE JOYS
Mr. Hawthorne: As a child, I've always had trouble letting Jesus come inside of
me. What does it feel l-...ike...?
Gabby but frick that, I'm still an atheist
Steph: ...!!!!!
Gabby: ?!?!?
Forrest is completely stonefaced
Mr. Hawthorne: ... No, no, that's preposterous.
(From Mac D.): you're a prodigy you are
Mr. Hawthorne: Well- ehm.
(To Mac D.): ;D
Mr. Hawthorne: I would say...
The presence of Jesus feels like...
A fire.
Steph oh, oh, this is gonna get weird...
Mr. Hawthorne: Deep in your heart, entering you, and filling you to the brim.
(To eldritch s.): mom said the world would end in 2012 because god told her in a
dream, but it didn't is Christianity real???
Mr. Hawthorne: With white, glowing heat.
Forrest completely
Gabby: D:
Forrest stonefaced
Mr. Hawthorne: Any opinions here?
Gabby WOWWWW Christians are fricked up
Steph covers her mouth with both hands
Forrest: Is it an unpleasant feeling.
(To eldritch s.): are jews real people
Mr. Hawthorne: No, no, not at all!
Forrest: Or is it unpleasant at first and then gets gradually better.
Mr. Hawthorne: It is something... to me, in any case, a love, and passion.
Steph ................god.... DAMN... you forrest
Gabby WOW CHRISTIANS ARE FRICKED UP

Mr. Hawthorne: A purpose.
Gabby WOW. WOW. WOW. WOW.
Forrest: Is it difficult to do.
Mr. Hawthorne: If that answers that, I will continNo, not at all.
(To eldritch s.): I like death metal and want to take it farther. How can I beco
me a satanist?
Forrest: Oh, I assumed it had to be, since letting jesus come inside children se
emed to be something only priests can do at mass.
Steph: --!!!!!!!!!!!!
Gabby AAAAA WHAT WHAT WHAT WHAT OH MY GOD WHAT
Gabby AAAAAA. AAAAAAA. AAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!
Mr. Hawthorne: That's all Theology, old sport.
Gabby A A A A A A A A A
Mr. Hawthorne: Your own faith should be your own experience.
Steph looks to be in intense, sudden prayer
Gabby: ;_;
Forrest: Does the alcohol help.
Gabby: ;A;
Steph hands firmly covering her mouth, eyes squeezed tight in concentration
Mr. Hawthorne: I'd rather not get tied in the specifics of the Mass, old sport.
(To eldritch s.): my friend says hes a muslin, should we still be friends??? Wha
t if he does a 9/11
Mr. Hawthorne takes out a new one
Mr. Hawthorne: ... Can you PROVE that God exists?
God's Not Dead, that was a fine film.
Gabby ohhhh GOD
Mr. Hawthorne: I recommend it.
Gabby SIGN...
Steph: ........
Forrest: I haven't heard of it.
Mr. Hawthorne: Opinions?
Steph quiet, quiet disappointment
Mr. Hawthorne: Does anyone believe that the existence of God can be proved?
Gabby nope
Forrest nah
Steph n
Anton raises his hand
Forrest ......well considering the fact that he's living a Divine Horror Story r
/n maybe...
Steph: ...?
Anton a good, Hungarian Catholic
Steph looks at Anton

Anton: I think...
Proved... to some, but not every person seeing proof in same ways.
So it not always enough.
Like... hidden image puzzle.
Or inkblot.
Gabby:
Gabby respects Anton's answer
Mr. Hawthorne: Very good, now, for the next one...
...
Mr. Hawthorne goes pale
Mr. Hawthorne: ... Are Jews people...?
Forrest: .....
Gabby UHHHHH
Mr. Hawthorne: Yes!
Yes they are people!
Will God forgive me if I haven't prayed sense 2005...
Space: on phone brb
Mr. Hawthorne is the new one he's read
Gabby:
Mr. Hawthorne: Of course.
Forrest: ....
Mac D.: this is a health class right
Mr. Hawthorne: yes but it is also mixed with religion
and philosophy
Mac D.: this school's got a piss-poor budget
Mr. Hawthorne: it's basically mr. hawthorne's lecture time
' mom said the world would end in 2012 because god told her in a dream, but it d
idn't is Christianity real???'
Mobile L: The tyrant
Mr. Hawthorne: ...
Forrest: .........
Mr. Hawthorne: What?
Steph likes Anton
Steph: ...
Gabby is again beginning to worry for her fellow students
Forrest is silently hoping his precognitive powers will kick in and the bell wil
l ring if he looks a the clock again
Mr. Hawthorne: ': I like death metal and want to take it farther. How can I beco
me a satanist?'
Steph: ...
Steph respects whoever wrote that
Mr. Hawthorne: ...
I...
Don't know...
' my friend says hes a muslin, should we still be friends??? What if he does a 9
/11'
Mr. Hawthorne 's eyes widen
Forrest looks at the clock again
Mobile L: Can I just say that Q&A with Mr. Hawthorne is one of my favorite bits
of this
Mr. Hawthorne: W-what...?
it's not going yet
Space: fuck the muslins
Mr. Hawthorne quickly pulls out another
Forrest GOD TRULY IS DEAD
Mr. Hawthorne: 'can you use mustard as lube'
Gabby frrriiiiick today is gonna SUCK
Mr. Hawthorne starts screaming
Gabby AAAAAAAAA
Gabby has to stop herself from screaming along with him
Steph quietly begins doodling in her notebook
Forrest stoooooone face
Forrest: ......
Mr. Hawthorne falls out of his chair
Forrest: ........
Mr. Hawthorne clasps his head
Forrest: ......I'll go get the nurse.
Gabby S2G IF YOU FRICKS KILLED MISTER HAWTHORNE
Steph enjoys drawing geometric shapes
Steph sorta neat little tiled cuboids
Forrest quietly gets up and starts heading for Foxhole's office at a very liesur
ely pace
Steph it's relaxing
Gabby AFTER HE SO THOUGHTFULLY ANSWERED MY BUDDHISM QUESTION
Steph wonders if she's entering a state of zen
Gabby AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Forrest: I think Mister Hawthorne is dying.
Gabby TODAY IS TERRRRRIBLLLEEEEEEEEE
Nurse Foxhole: Health class?
Forrest: Health class.
Gabby AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Nurse Foxhole: That's what I thought.
Let's go get him.
Space: he's just lying on the floor
screaming
Mobile L: Does this mean you can use mustard as lube?
Space: the question remains unanswerable
Mobile L: Now Vlad will never know
Space: inb4 it was jason that asked

Mac D.: i bet it was that fucker ken
Space: ok but real talk here
have any
of the party
spoken with jason
even once
Mobile L: Not Gab
Nurse Foxhole: jaime has
Space: not steph
his one friend
Mac D.: i have
no idea
Forrest: ........
Forrest is visibly annoyed that his plan to appeal to reason to the Tyrant Hawth
orne is not going to work out
Gabby http://img01.deviantart.net/0c89/i/2009/298/a/3/head_meets_desk_by_cloudri
ven.png
Steph has moved onto drawing zigzags
Forrest: .......
Forrest wonders where Theodore went
Jason: ... T-that was...
Gabby is buddhism correct. am i being punished for something i did in a past lif
e. am i pol pot reincarnated.
Jason: ... Something...
Steph draws them in little differing segments of black and white
Forrest: This is why I'm not the religious type.
Steph: Hey, Ken.
Jason: ... Who... a-asked the...
Forrest: Does it really matter at this point.
Ken: What is it, Stephanie?
Steph: Which one did you ask?
Vlad: Is it so bad to just want to know the truth?
Gabby ...if i really am pol pot reincarnated i am like. fricking really sorry.
Gabby AAAAAAAAAAA YOU
Forrest: When does this class end.
Vlad: It's coming.
Gabby I MAY BE POL POT BUT YOU'RE FRICKING STALIN YOU SON OF A FRICK
Forrest: who am i the reincarnation of gabby
Ken: I didn't ask of those questions.
Gabby you're like... the one american president who was all fat and stuff.
Gabby ...daft? was that it?
Forrest: gee a fat joke how original
Steph: Oh, darn.
...Well, no, I'd actually be kind of surprised if you did.
Forrest: you see me going after your slanty eyes or your stupid glasses huh
Gabby IT'S BETTER THAN BEING POL POT YOU FRICK
Ken nods
Forrest: ......
Gabby unsubtle internal crisis
Forrest: almost accusingly
Jasper: I will never know how to become a Satanist.
Nathan looks back at him
Nathan: ... What...?
Forrest: ..Which question was yours.
Nathan: ... it was anonymous.
... I thin that's what it means...
Forrest: All of them were anonymous.
Steph: Well, you could always take a DIY approach. Just start painting pentagram
s everywhere, it'll sort itself out.
Nathan: ... I asked if...
Forrest: ...
Nathan: God would forgive me for not praying since 2005...
Forrest: .......Oh.
Nathan seems completely ashamed
Nathan humiliated
Forrest goes back at staring at the clock
Space: greatest feeling in the world - pajama pants fersh out of dryer
*fresh
Jasper: That's a little forward.
Forrest: I asked the one about jesus coming inside children.
Gabby:
Gabby no words
Gabby only screams. internal shrieks of pure sorrow.
Gabby HOLIDAY_IN_CAMBODIA.WAV
Steph: You've gotta start somewhere, eh?
Narrator : The bell rings.
It is now lunch.
Gabby simultaneously wants this to end and wants this to last longer so she won'
t have to see her dad
Forrest HOO BOY TASTY FREEDOM
Steph aah thank god
Forrest takes a moment before visiting lachance to try and get a peek at how Haw
thorne is doing
Gabby defeatedly marches to the cafeteria
Steph makes her way to the realm of food
Gabby:
Gabby begins the despondent unpacking of her lunch
Narrator : He is gibbering.
Forrest: ....
Forrest yeah that ain't gonna work out
Forrest grumpily makes his way to the kafay
Narrator : brb
Gabby tangible gloom aura
Narrator : well
i'm watching gme of thrones
it just came on you see
Mac D.: you cunt
Gabby: winter is cwming
Space crashes a car into jaime lannister
Mac D. has a sit at the Fucking Loser Table, waiting until (seergetsbackfromhisf
uckinshow) he finishes his lunch to talk to Lachance
Forrest: something something i do
.....
Gabby:
Forrest casual food consumption
Steph: ...It's weird without Jaime here.
Gabby: ...Yeah, uh... It is.
Forrest: I'm used to people not being around me at lunch.
Gabby: ...Oh...
...I'm... I'm gonna...
Gabby gets out her notebook
Forrest watches her whip it out
Steph: ...?
Gabby begins haphazardly penning Jaime a get well soon letter in her clumsy, chi
ldish hand
Forrest: .......
Forrest is reminded of Sooz, for some odd reason.....
Gabby is several measures more cantankerous and moody than your beloved kid sist
er, tho
Steph: Hey, can I write something on there too?
Gabby: ...Frick, gah. Is it... Is it spelled like "J A M E" or what?
...Oh, uh... Sure, yeah.
Steph: It's, uh... jay ay eye emm ee.
Gabby: ...Huh. Wouldn't have thought.
Gabby slides it to her after messily correcting her spelling
Forrest: I thought it was pronounced "Haimay."
Gabby: ...Nyeheheh! Yeah, like... Like the Spanish people.
Steph writes a corny little message in the margins, along with her name and a sm
iley
Steph: Do you want to say anything, Forrest?
Gabby: My cousins in Texas met some Spanish guys, actually. They're nice.
Forrest: Anything I would write would sound insincere. I'll buy him something at
some point.
.......
....You still owe me twelve dollars.
Gabby observes Steph's message, covetously peering down at her handwriting

Steph: 'did you hear about the guy who lost his whole left side in an accident?
well, he's alright now!'
I'll get around to that someday.
Gabby: ...Nyeheheheh. Wow...
Steph smirks
Forrest: .....
Gabby gently grabs for it back and keeps scrawlin'
Forrest forrestface.jpg
Steph: Hey, I'm good for it.
Gabby:
Forrest: Somehow I doubt that.
Steph: Gabby, aren't I good for it?
Gabby pauses in her writing, kinda looking to the side and staring solemnly to t
he side
Gabby: ? Eh?
Did you say something...?
Forrest: How much money does she owe you, Gabby.
Gabby: ...Huh? I... don't think I ever lended Steph any money.
...Steph. You borrowed money from Forrest?
Steph: I might've.
Forrest: She did.
Gabby: ...Do you have the money right now?
Steph: Well, that's a good question.
Gabby:
Steph smiles
Forrest: .....
Gabby gets kind of somber and serious looking again
Forrest: ....Don't borrow money from her, Gabby.
Gabby: ...Steph. You either got it or you don't.
And... And if you do.
You need to pay him back.
Because...
Gabby somber, serious look intensifies
Steph: ...
Steph oh
Gabby: You... You know who doesn't pay someone back?
...A... A deadbeat.
Steph: ....
Steph fuck man
Gabby: And you shouldn't be a deadbeat... You should never even get close to bei
ng that...
Steph: ...
Steph fishes out her wallet
Gabby just looks dead fricking serious and vaguely wounded
Steph gives Forrest twelve dollars

Gabby:
Forrest: ....
Forrest looks at the money, then looks up at Steph, eyes narrowed, and takes it
Gabby nods somberly and inhales deeply through her nose
Steph: Man... you should think about going into debt collecting sometime, you kn
ow?
Gabby:
Steph smiles, in an attempt to lighten the tension
Forrest: You're a good kid, Gab.
Gabby: ...Mrgh, thanks... 'M going into STEM, though...
Forrest: Don't let this deadbeat take that from you.
Steph: Hehe!
Gabby: Mrrghh...
Gabby sighs and pens the last bits of Jaime's letter, squinting down at it in qu
iet dissatisfaction
Gabby: ...Totally fricked up the Es... Oh well...
Gabby sad eating
Steph shoots Forrest a plaintive, embarrassed, and concerned look
Forrest: .....
......Can I see the note for a second.
Gabby: ...Oh... Sure, go 'head...
Gabby slides it over to him, sadly picking at her salad
Forrest writes down a generic Get Well Soon message to Jaime on the letter. His
handwritting is sloppy af
Gabby solidarity, bruthaaaaaaa
Forrest slides the note back to her
Gabby nods a bit at him and folds it into neat thirds
Forrest: ....
Steph: I'm sure he'll love it.
Gabby: ...Yeah...
Forrest: There's sincerity in a handwritten letter.
Gabby: ...'S what Grandma always says...
Forrest: I've never enjoyed writing them, though. My penmanship is poor.
I type most of what I write.
Gabby: ...Yeah. I mean... I'm not that great at typing, either.
Fricking all the punctuations...
Forrest: How long have you been typing for.
Steph takes care not to mention her normal person handwriting
Gabby: Like... Probably since I was eight or so.
Writing in general is just fricking really hard.
Forrest: You'll gradually get better at it as you keep doing it. It's all muscle
memory.
Gabby: ...Yeah, guess so... I dunno, probably in college, they'll explain the co
mmas and crap better.
Forrest: ......
....Were you not taught where commas are used?
Gabby: Well, like, I was, I just... I didn't catch it so well. I mean, if I think
about it really hard, I can remember okay, 's just a fricking chore.
Just as long as I don't jack up any fricking crap on my doctoral thesis, that's
gotta be immaculate.
Forrest: ...I could try helping you.
Gabby: ...You'd... You'd do that?
Forrest: Yeah, sure.
Gabby: ...Frick, um... Thanks. I mean, if it's not any trouble or any crap. I kn
ow you're already kinda frickin' slogged with the whole being new to Canada thin
g, aside from all the... y'know.
Forrest: It's fine, I have more free time than you think.
Gabby: ...Okay.
Gabby brightens up a tiny bit
Forrest: I need to speak with Ms. Lachance this period, but I can try and get a
little in now.
Steph: ....
Steph is having a moment of quiet reflection
Gabby: Okay, yeah, that's fine.
Steph at the fact that Forrest, the weird American, is better at cheering up Gab
by than her, who has just made the situation worse
Forrest: Alright, gimmie the gist on which bits you now about punctuation alread
y.
Gabby quite the quandary, is it noy
Forrest actually seems a bit looser and less like a Turbogrouch, doing this.
Steph maybe he Does have a heart, somewhere in there...??
Forrest almost comes off as if he DOESN'T want to die
Gabby: ...Right, so... Period at the end of a sentence, also the question mark a
nd exclamation point, depending on what kinda sentence, and uh... Commas, they c
ome up in sentence pauses, right? I mean, like, more often than not?
Forrest: Right. They're also used when listing out words in a sequence.
So, say, you were righting out the sentence "I need you to pick up bread, milk,
butter and eggs."
*writing
How the comma works is that it's essentially replacing the word "and" when linki
ng all these words together.
So you place a comma after bread and milk, nut not butter.
*but
Gabby: ...Ohhhh! Oh, I getcha, I think. See, yeah, I did that in the past, I thi
nk. I put a comma after something that came before "and", and it got marked, and
I didn't get why.
Forrest: Yeah, it's redundant. So when you're listing out words, just picture th
e comma replacing the word and.
Gabby: Yeah, frick, that makes sense. They're like pronouns, kinda, but for "and
" in that particular context.
Forrest: Right.
Gabby just looks fricking ecstatic that her mind is correctly processing this in
formation
Gabby NYEHEHE, TAKE THAT, ANYONE WHO THINKS I SHOULDN'T BE IN HIGH SCHOOL YET
Forrest: So, if you've got the period, the comma, the question mark, the exclama
tion mark, and the apostrophe down, you're good to go for a lot of sentences.
Then you get into stuff like hyphens, parenthesis, quotation marks, colons, semi
colons, then it gets a little trickier at first.
Steph: You can get by without, uh, semicolons, generally. Commas work there too.
Forrest: They look nicer to college professors and employers, though.
Gabby: ...Ohhh. Well frick, I was about to trash the guy who invented them, but
if colleges like 'em...
Forrest: Alright, how much do you know about the apostrophe.
Gabby: ...It, uh... When you're... When you say something belongs to someone, yo
u put the apostrophe and S after their name, and... uh... For, like "it's"... Or
... Or some instances of "it's", it gets frickin' hecka tricky...
Forrest: Okay, for the instance of "It's" it works like this.
Steph: It's only ever got an apostrophe if it's a contraction of 'it is'.
Steph stealing your thunder...
Forrest: ........When you're writing it as the possessive form of "It," you don'
t use the apostrophe.
Steph: And there's never an apostrophe after the s.
I see people doing that sometimes.
Mobile L: COUGH COUGH, OLIVETREE
Gabby: ...Ohhh... Huh. And the... the possessive form, that's like... "The cat l
icks its tail", something like that?
Forrest: Yeah, that's it.
Steph: Yeah. It belongs to the cat, so it's possessive.
Forrest: But what if it belongs to more than one cat.
Steph: Cats only have one tail, Forrest.
Narrator : b ack
Forrest: Could be a fake tail they all play with.
Gabby: ...Uhhh... Hmm...
Narrator : what the fuck have you been doing
for an hour
Space: get well notes and grammar lessons
Mobile L: They're teaching Gabby about punctuation to cheer her up
Forrest: When you're writing plural possessives, that's when you put the apostro
phe after the s.
Space: steph repaid forrest after gabby sadly called her a deadbeat
Narrator : Lachance sits by Mr Schmidt, waiting for Forrest.
Forrest: So when you're referring to the tails on multiple cats, it's "The cats'
tails."
....?
Narrator : Mr. Glass is watching everything and boredly keeping notes
Forrest notices Lachance
Narrator : However
Gabby: ...Ohhh! Oh, I see. That makes sense, then.
Narrator : The cafeteria is quickly stormed by older students
Steph: ...?
Gabby: Well, frick, tha
?
Forrest: ...Alright, I'll see y....?
Forrest notices the older students swarm in as he gets up to move
Gabby: Uhhh... Are these the...
...Club people...?
The Dark Mistress: U-uh...
Mary...
You're in my way.
Forrest: .......
Maria MacArthur: Shit..
Maria MacArthur YOUTH ROLLS out of the way
Gabby: ...Ahhh frick! It's like the crap with the fraternities and sororities, i
sn't it?
Steph: No, it's like... uh, like the chess club. Only not chess.
Gabby: ...Oh.
...'S there a trigonometry club?
Maria MacArthur: Uh...
Space: oh my fuck
Maria MacArthur: Go on, Mistress...
The Dark Mistress: ...
Steph: I don't... know?
The Dark Mistress: Hello, young minds!
I am the, uh, Dark Mistress of the Occult Association of Clubs!
Gabby: ...All these guys are so awkward. Why are they so awkward when they're ol
d?
Forrest: ........
The Dark Mistress: And we need three more members to be a club!
Forrest is staring RIGHT AT The Mistress
Forrest: with his face
Steph: ...Oh, hey, there you go, Gab.
The Dark Mistress: Or else Mr. Hawthorne won't let us use school facilities!
Forrest right in the middle of the cafeteria
The Dark Mistress stares right back at him
The Dark Mistress: ... Maria...
Gabby: ...Are they Satanists?
The Dark Mistress: It's looking at me...
Forrest: .......
Forrest wow rude
Steph: I don't think they're Satanists.
Gabby: ...Heyyy! He's a he!
Maria MacArthur: That's a gr- Abort.
Gabby: He may be a Texan, but he is a human male being.
Maria MacArthur rolls under the desk
Forrest: ......
Maria MacArthur: *table
Steph: ...????
Forrest: ...I'm from New Jersey, Gab.
Gabby: ...Oh. Ohhh!
Dana "Papa Joe" Jones: Eyyy, Jersey!
Gabby: A New Jerseyan, then!
Gabby: But they're people, too!
The Dark Mistress: So...
If you would like t- Oh.
Forrest: .......
The Dark Mistress: If you would like to sign up.
Please.
Stand up.
Forrest: ................
Forrest .......shit
Dana "Papa Joe" Jones: Will the real Slim Shady please stand up?
Please stand up.
Gabby:
Forrest is glancing feverishly around for the closest place to sit down
Maria MacArthur youthrolls out

Steph: ...Should we do it?
Gabby: ...Will they do the hazing to us?
Maria MacArthur: We've got a live one!
Forrest ...SHHHHHHHIT
Maria MacArthur: Only two more.
Steph: If they do, it's not gonna be bad? I don't think it is.
Gabby: ...Oh frick they clubnapped Forrest!
Forrest: ....
Steph: Well, that settles it.
Gabby: Hey! Hey, hold on!
Steph gets up
Forrest well....at least it's not fucking basketball
Maria MacArthur: Chung-Jae, take him away!
Forrest: .....Wait, what.
Gabby: You can't clubnap Forrest!
Moon Chung-Jae slowly walks out
Forrest: Hang on, I'm still having lunch.
Gabby gets up
Moon Chung-Jae seizes him
Gabby: CLUBNAP ME INSTEAD, DANG IT!
Forrest: Let go- I need to speak withrolling 3d20 -1
(
9
+
8
+
10
)-1
= 26
Maria MacArthur: We got them~
Maria MacArthur rolls and seizes Gabby
Gabby: I AM YOUR RANSOM, NOW FR GHHH EASY!
Space: maria really is the dark souls of third heaven
Gabby: YOU OLD KIDS ARE SO WEIIIIIIRD
Forrest is forrestfacing at miss lachance like "hhhhhelp meeeeeee"
Moon Chung-Jae begins dragging him away
Gabby: HEY! HEYYYYY YOU'RE VIOLATING HIS HUMAN RIGHTS!
Forrest: Stop-...I need to speak with Ms.Gabby: FALSE ARREST! FALSE ARREST!
Moon Chung-Jae: You can do it later.
Forrest struggles in vain
Maria MacArthur carries her out
Gabby: BRUTALITY! BRUTALITY, I SAY!
Nghhhhh!
Maria MacArthur: Shhhh.
Gabby scowls fiercely up at her captor
The Dark Mistress: ... We need one more.

Forrest: Let go of me, for goddsake.
Steph is standing over theeere
The Dark Mistress points
The Dark Mistress: Mark!
Gabby looks like she should be in junior high instead
Steph: You know, I can just - walk on my own?
The Dark Mistress: No time!
Gabby: Brutalityyyyyyy...
The Dark Mistress has them taken to the Nurse's office
Forrest is a very grouchy boy
Steph: Well... this is a good start, huh, Gab?
Forrest: Will you let go of me, now.
Gabby: I am gonna fricking call the literal Hague.
The Dark Mistress: Hey, old man!
We've got three more members!
Forrest: ........
Steph: ...Is he still screaming?
The Dark Mistress: Eat it!
Forrest: ....Are they even treating him.
Gabby: ...Is he gonna have a stroke and die...?
Forrest: .............
Nurse Foxhole is taking pictures on his phone as Hall is trying to talk him down
Gabby: ...Mister Hawthorne... D-don't die, okay?
I believe in you...
Nurse Foxhole takes a Selfie with Hawthorne in the background
Nurse Foxhole: Baller!
Forrest: ......Maybe if we sing to him.
Gabby: ...Gahhh, you fricker! It won't be funny if he dies under your neglig
Steph: Oh my god.
Gabby: ...Frick I cannot sing.
Forrest: Jesus loves me, this I know.
Gabby: ...Uhhh... But... But he needs us...
Forrest: For the Bible tells me so,
Gabby: LITTLE ONES TO HIM BEELONG
THEY ARE WEAK, BUT HE IS STRONG!
Forrest looks at Steph, expecting a third verse
Steph: ...What? I don't even know this song, don't look at me.
Forrest: ....You are worthless, you know that.
Gabby: Ahhh C'MON Steph, I'm an ex-Buddhist atheist and I know it...
Forrest half hearted call-to-arms
Gabby: YESSS JESUS LOVES MEEEEE
Forrest: Everybody.
Steph: Well, what the fuck, how do I not know it ehn?
Gabby: YESSSS JESUS LOVES MEEEEEE
Steph: *then
Gabby: (I dunnooooo)
YESSSS JESUS LOVES ME
Forrest: Yes, Jesus loves me.
Gabby: THE BIBLE TELLS ME SOOOOOO
Narrator : Mooin Chung-Jae, Minerva O'Malley, Dana, Maria, Lilly, and Anton sing
it
Forrest: Jesus loves me, he will say.
Steph is just boggling at this
Gabby: uhhh... FOR THE BIBLE TELLS ME SO
Mr. Hawthorne has calmed down
Mr. Hawthorne: ...
Gabby apparently only learned the first verses
Forrest: Gabby he's stopped screaming.
Gabby: LITTLE ONES T
...Ohhh!
Mr. Hawthorne: Please leave m.e
Gabby: Mr. Hawthorne... 'S gonna be okay, I promise...
Steph: ...(How the fuck did that work??)
Forrest: ........
...You gonna let go of me now.
Gabby: ...The power of Christ compels you frickers.
...Mr. Hawthorne, really... II could go to a Mass or something if it'd make you f
eel better...
Mr. Hawthorne: Leave me.
Gabby:
Gabby :c
Nurse Foxhole: But this is my office, boMr. Hawthorne: GET OUT!
Steph: ........................................................
Gabby: ...You fricks heard him. GET LOST. LEAVE THE MAN!
AND UNHAND US.
You should all be so ashamed.
The Dark Mistress: ... Suck it!
The Dark Mistress leaves the office
Gabby: Especially you!
The Dark Mistress: So remember!
You, uh.
Will attend our meetings.
Or else.
Forrest: ....Alright, listen.
Gabby: ...Suuuure, okay, now frick off you stupid old kids!
Forrest: There's been a misunderstanding. I was not standing up because I wanted
to join your club.
Steph: ...Uh... I'm in basketball, there's not going to be any scheduling confli
cts there, right?
Forrest: .......
The Dark Mistress: Pfft, no.
Chung-Jae's in it too.
Gabby: Yeah, and unhand him! That was part of the bargain, and you guys are trea
ding on it so hard.
Forrest: Are you eve listening.
Steph: Oh, cool.
Gabby: TREADING, I SAY
Steph: Okay, I have no complaints.
Forrest: You're not listening, are you.
The Dark Mistress: We'll only let you go if all of you agree.
Forrest: I could wait until one of the staff sees you manhandling me.
Narrator : They are just watching.
Forrest: .....
Gabby: Uhhh... Anton? You wanna be in this club or something?

Forrest looks at the Teachers watching
Gabby: We could still do a trade thing...
Anton: Was already in!
Gabby: ...DANG IT.
Steph: Look, Forrest, just join the darn club? Okay?
Gabby: No, but they're infringing on his human rights!
Forrest: This is the second time today I have been forced into an organization a
gainst my will.
Gabby: And the democratic process.
Forrest: I am a passive man, but I will not stand for this.
Steph: I mean, it's obviously the only way he'll ever get out of his comfort zon
e, you know?
Gabby: And other things.
Steph: This'll be good for him. In the long run, you know.
Anton: Then you will REMAIN TRAPPED FOREVER.
Forrest: In a democratic society, a man should be allowed to choose the life he
lives, damn the consequences.
Anton: FUCK
The Dark Mistress: I SAID THAT
Gabby: I could see the basketball doing that, maybe, but hanging with these old
kids? No way!
Forrest: That is what is means to be free.
The Dark Mistress: IN THE PHANTOM ZONE.
Forrest: Toss me into the Phantom Zone, then.
Steph: (Honestly you guys are the perfect fit for these guys, I dunno what the p
roblem is here.)
Gabby: See? That lady, I bet she wrote the one Harry Potter story with the gothi
c chick!
The Dark Mistress: TAKE HIM TO THE ZO...
Did you just...
Say I wrote My Immortal?
Gabby INTENSE STARE
Gabby: I might have.
Forrest: ........I'm sorry, what are we talking about.
Steph: . . .
The Dark Mistress: That's really mean, you know?
Forrest: ........
Gabby: ...Oh. Is it now? And would you like me to retract this statement?
Forrest: ...Where am I going where are youMaria MacArthur forces him in the chaifr
Forrest: .......
......Is this the Phantom Zone.
Maria MacArthur subjects him to just really awful anime
Forrest: Isn't this just the public lib- oh.
....Oh, so this is what you meant.
Maria MacArthur: Don't talk to me, maggot.
Steph: ...Hey, uh, Gabby?
Forrest: .....This is it. This is your idea of torture.
I CURSE THREE!
Gabby:
Gabby looks INTENSELY at Steph
Maria MacArthur: DEFCON 3 initiated.

Mobile L: This is the anime they're watching, and you can't tell me otherwise ht
tps://youtu.be/i8C86XAjxeU?t=1m48s
Forrest: What does that mean.
Steph: ...Uh... discretion is the better part of valor, sometimes. You know?
Maria MacArthur switches it to Christian Rock Music
Space: oh my god
Forrest: ........
Gabby: ...Steph. When injustices happen, you gotta fricking... like, make 'em st
op and junk.
Forrest: ....Really.
Mobile L: Chris Tomlin and Smegma Princess
UGUUUUU~
Forrest: Look, I do not want to be shanghaied into some after-school thing I hat
e. I hate school enough as it is.
Steph: Yeah, but this isn't a fight we're going to be able to win.
Steph: It... just isn't. Trust me on this one?
Forrest: I'm already being shaken down by the Basketball team, I don't need this
shit in my life, too.
If you don't join...
We'll lose our club.
Gabby: ...Steph, that is what they say about everything. Andand then someone come
s and makes a victory happ
The Dark Mistress: I will stop at nothing to save it.

Gabby: ...Look, old kid.
Listen.
The Dark Mistress: I am the Dark Mistress!
Forrest: ....You know I can tune this out, right.
The Dark Mistress: Do not forget my name!
Forrest: Like, it isn't physically hurting me.
Space: do not forget me
Gabby: ...Dark Mistress Old Kid. You really need Forrest that bad.
Space: two four six oh one
Maria MacArthur: Physical pain.
Maria MacArthur looks down at him
Maria MacArthur cracks her knuckles
Forrest: ......Are you going to hit me.
Maria MacArthur continues looking down at him
Forrest: .......
.....Like, we're going to have to go to class eventually.
Maria MacArthur: Would you like to find out.
Forrest: Okay, yeah, hit me.
Gabby: ...See, I was gonna trade myself for him because I'm... I'm mentally like
an old kid.
Maria MacArthur fucking punches him
Gabby: That's why I'm in high school, see.
Forrest HOOF
Forrest: .....Yyep, theeeere we gooooo...
Maria MacArthur: rolling 3d20 + 2
(
1
+
6
+
7
)+2
= 16
Maria MacArthur only glanced him
Steph: ...Uh... we have a friend who's in the hospital. Maybe you could put his
name on the roster for later on? When he gets out?
Gabby: ...Yeah, he's pretty old. You'd like him!
Forrest: So you're really going to physically beat me until I join this club.
Maria MacArthur nods
The Dark Mistress: No, we need the body right now.
Gabby: ...WhBody??? You creepy fricks...
Forrest: .....So this is it then, this is the seedy underbelly of this country.
The death of freedom.
The Dark Mistress: Hawthorne needs to see our new members.
Gabby: Look! Look, he just needs to talk to a lady!
Is that so wrong?
Forrest: Why do you need me, specifically.
The Dark Mistress: We can't let him go unless he agrees.
Maria MacArthur: I like you.
Forrest: Does literally no one else want to join your club.
Gabby: Ohhh my GOD. You're You're gonna make Canada look bad, he's an American.
They like freedom and crap down there.
Forrest: ...You like me, and you just punched me.
Maria MacArthur: Yes.
Forrest: Are you just saying things you think will get me to join.
Maria MacArthur: No.
I like you.
But I will hurt you.
Because I like my club more.
Forrest: ......
The Dark Mistress: I care not for your politics.
Forrest: .....So, you're going to lose the club without a new member.
Gabby: ...Nghhhhh, frickin'...
Gabby huffs and finally shuts up, assuring herself that AT LEAST this isn't her
dad...
Forrest: And I am. The only person. You can get.
Forrest: ......What does your club even do.
Steph: ...
Steph looks at Gab, then at The Dark Mistress
Maria MacArthur: Everything.
Occultism.
Anime.
History.
Movies.
Steph: You guys have a video game club, right?
Maria MacArthur: Video games.
The Dark Mistress: We are... a conglomerate of clubs.
An occult conglomerate.
Forrest: ........It's just an excuse to have space to goof off in after school,
isn't it.
The Dark Mistress: We can do anything.
Maria MacArthur: Maybe.

Forrest: .........
Gabby: ...Is there room for trigonometry?
Forrest: .......I have one last question.
Steph: Oh, yeah, there you go, Gab.
Forrest: Do you meet immediately after school.
Maria MacArthur: Go for it.
Gabby: And if not trig, applied physics at the very least.
Maria MacArthur: We meet during the times the Dark Mistress sets, it's case-by-c
ase.
Minerva O'Malley: I am afraid I have beaten you to the mark.
Gabby: ...Oh! Well whyyyy didn't ya say so!
Forrest: .......Do those times take place within the first hour after school.
Minerva O'Malley: Yes, Gabbriella "Gabby" Tran.
Gabby: See, there you go, all you frickers need is a little salesmanship, a litt
le appeal.
Minerva O'Malley: And Stephanie "Steph" Karloman.
Gabby: And less... less grabbing... and using my full name...
Gabby scratches the back of her neck
Steph: Oh, wow, you did some research, huh?
Maria MacArthur: You must ask the Mistress.
Forrest: ............
Forrest sighs heavily
Minerva O'Malley: I am Minerva O'Malley.
Gabby: You kids are old. You can sell a product. I know you can.
Forrest: .....i'm gonna have to do basketballe too, will i.....god dammit.
The Dark Mistress: We have sold it.
Gabby: ...Oh, uh... Cool. Hi, Minerva.
Steph: Can I call you Minnie?
Forrest: ......Alright. I'll join your club to keep it afloat.
Because I like you.
The Dark Mistress: Mary should be coming out any second now.
Maria MacArthur: Good.
Gabby: But like, you gotta sell it in an appealing way that's not about grabbing
.
Maria MacArthur marches out with military precision
Gabby: You gotta grab only the attentions.
Forrest walks out, aggravated
Gabby: The hearts and minds of th... Forrest!
You alright? Diddid they waterboard you?
Forrest: No, but they hit me.
Gabby: ...You frickers!
Forrest: It's alright, I'm joining the club anyway.
Gabby: That is poor salesmanship! Apologize to Forrest right now!
The Dark Mistress: No.
We will meet again, next lunch.
Goodbye.
Gabby: ...Gah! Impossible with you old kids. So set in your ways...
Gabby pinches the bridge of her nose
Steph: Wow... this club is great, huh?
Gabby: ...College is gonna tear 'em a new butthole, lemme tell you right now.
Forrest: I hate this school.
Gabby: ...C'mon, let's just go talk to Lachance.
Forrest: ..........Hang on one sec.
Gabby: ?
Forrest peeks into the nurse's office

Forrest: Mister Hawthorne.
Mr. Hawthorne: I'm feeling much better now.
Gabby: ...Oh, uh... Good, that's good!
Forrest: I'm glad. Could I please be excused from the basketball draft.
Mr. Hawthorne: I must resume teaching Health.
Gabby: ...Sorry about all th
Mr. Hawthorne: Pardon me, my students need me.

Steph: ...Hehehehehe!
Forrest: ......
Gabby: ...Man, if they fricking make him have a stroke or something...
Gabby clenches her tiny fists
Mr. Hawthorne walks into the empty classroom
Steph: Aw, man... how long 'til lunch is over?
Gabby: ...Better go talk to Lachance while there's time, Forrest...
Forrest: I hate this country.
Gabby:
Forrest heads into the cafeteria
Gabby:
Gabby sighs quietly
Ms. Lachance is chugging coffee
Forrest approaches THE COCOA MAIDEN
Forrest: Ms Lachance.
Roland Glass: ... Was there...
A kidnapping...?
Forrest: ....?
Roland Glass is nothing things down on his clipboard
Ms. Lachance: No.
Ms. Lachance looks at Forrest
Gabby: ...God... Today is just gonna fricking suck giant horse dongs for everyon
e, isn't it...
Ms. Lachance: What is it?
Gabby WOWWW LANGUAGE YOUNG LADY
Steph pauses, noting that she'll have to choose her words more carefully now
Forrest: .....Are you being interviewed. I can wait.
Ms. Lachance: No.
Steph: You just gotta take things step by step, you know?
Gabby: ...What if all the steps lead to crap sucking, though...?
Forrest: ......Alright, then.
Gabby sighs deeply and rubs her temples
Forrest: Is it alright if I ask you some questions of my own then.
Ms. Lachance: I assume that's why you wanted to talk to me.
Forrest: It is, but....
Forrest eyes the three fucks directly behind her
Steph: You don't know that for sure until it happens, just... uh, y'know, that i
t's -- what I'm trying to say is, just try to push that stuff aside for now.
Gabby: ...I'll try... But... Like...

...Some things are just... They're so big and... and unmovable, you can't even h
ope to push 'em, y'know...?
Ms. Lachance moves over to his seat
Ms. Lachance burns with silent rage, you can feel it when she is this close
Gabby: You just gotta... stand there... as they come in andand... wreck your crap
and frick things up...
Forrest: ....
.....I wanted to ask about Nurse Foxhole and Ms. Lao.
Ms. Lachance: Pffft.
Foxhole probably tried to get in her pants.
She's smart, though.
Forrest: .........
Gabby: Andand you can't question it, nope! You just gotta endure it when it happe
ns, because it's one of those things nobody's supposed to even think of question
ing, because it should be one way, but it's completely fricking the other, and y
ou can't even hope to explain it in a way that doesn't make you look like a colo
ssal weiner, and...
Ms. Lachance: She'd never touch that dweeb.

Forrest: ......I spoke to her at the library a several times over the past few d
ays.
Steph: ...
Steph the most important thing here is making it look like you know what to talk
about
Gabby:
Forrest: .....She told me she's suffering symptoms associated with pregnancy.
Ms. Lachance: What?
Forrest: Not those exact words, but what she told me correlate...
Ms. Lachance has was just about to sip her coffee, but holds it seconds away fro
m her lips
Forrest: ......I can't say anything for certain, but.....I think that's the reas
on behind her sudden change in behavior and depression..
Steph: Well, Gabby. I'm not going to lie and say that I know exactly how you fee
l, 'cause I don't. But... if you ever need to take some time to vent, or to get
away from stuff... you got my number, you know where I live, my door's always op
en and all that stuff.
Ms. Lachance: ...
rolling 3d20 + 3
(
2
+
10
+
17
)+3
= 32
Forrest: ....I've been asking around, trying to learn more about her.
Gabby: ...Uh...
Ms. Lachance the glass explodes in her hand

Gabby sighs quietly
Forrest: ...!
Gabby: ...Can I...
Ms. Lachance: ...

Gabby motions for Steph to come in closer
Ms. Lachance stands up
Ms. Lachance walks out
Steph approaches
Forrest: ........
Forrest tries to follow
Steph: ...?
Gabby: ...God, God, with all the other crap that's going on... This is gonna sou
nd so stupid...
Ms. Lachance grabs his collar and begins dragging him
Nurse Foxhole: W-w-wo-wait!
Steph takes one look at them, then at forrest, and rapidly refocuses to Gabby
Gabby:
Steph: I'm sure it's not. What's up?
Gabby peers in that direction too
Gabby: ...See? Something'ssomething's happening right now, even...
Forrest: ...
Steph: We can worry about that later.
Gabby:
Gabby just looks all worried and confused and guilty
Mac D.: a health bar appears at the bottome of the screen
"Lachance: Lord Of Cocoa
Forrest: Ms. Lachance, wait.
Nurse Foxhole: W-www...
Steph: It's fine, Gabby. I swear to you, it's absolutely no problem at all. I'm
the one asking, for crying out loud.
Gabby: ...Okay... Uh...
Ms. Lachance: What?
Gabby: ...You've seen that I live with my grandparents, right?
Forrest: We don't know anything absolutely for sure, yet, please stop.
Ms. Lachance: No.
Steph: Yeah.
Ms. Lachance: What the fuck did you do, you slimy, fucking worthless sack of shi
t?
Gabby: ...My mom and my dad are still alive.
Forrest: Ms. Lachance, please.
Ms. Lachance: Give me one reason.
Nurse Foxhole is struggling to get lose
Steph: ...Oh...
Nurse Foxhole: W-w-w-wh...
Forrest: It won't fix anything. Please. Not this way.
Gabby: And... Dad, he's fricking... He's coming into town today.
Ms. Lachance: Then what would you have me do?
Nurse Foxhole: W-w-why are you hitting me!?
What's all this about!?
Gabby: And Grandma and Grandpa... Theythey're fricking... After all he put them t
hrough, they're...
Forrest: I want you to talk to me. Both of you.
Ms. Lachance lets him go

Forrest: ....
Nurse Foxhole falls to the ground and sits against the wall
Nurse Foxhole: What the hell...?
Forrest looks at Foxhole to see how bad he's hurt
Steph pauses, clearly unfamiliar with these kind of familial tensions
Nurse Foxhole has a black eye
Forrest: ......
Forrest is not about to let her get fired
Gabby: ...He fricking walked all over them. They raised him great, they came her
e from fricking war-torn Vietnam to raise a family, and hehe... He used them! He
squandered it!
Forrest: .........What happened between you two.
Nurse Foxhole: What?
She just hit me, that's what!
Forrest: I don't mean that....I mean before.
Gabby: He's a fricking selfish loser who only cares about weed and anime.
Steph: ...
Nurse Foxhole: What are you talking about, Forrest...?
Gabby: He...! I... I've never even seen my Mom...
Ms. Lachance: ...
Forrest: "It's like it used to be."
Steph: ...Gabby... this might be a long shot, but... if he's coming back, then m
aybe that's a good thing. Maybe that means he wants to reconcile.
Ms. Lachance: That DOESN'T concern this.
Gabby:
Gabby is very tense right now
Nurse Foxhole: ...
Gabby: ...And if he does? Why should I believe him? How do I know he isn't just
gonna mooch and leech and mistreat my Grandma and my Grandpa because he knows th
ey love him, even after...?
Forrest: ...It does. Please, I need to know what happened.
Nurse Foxhole: ... We used to date.
... Uh...
Forrest: ....And.
Nurse Foxhole: It was pretty intimate... but, uh...
... Rachel just...
...
Forrest: ....Please be honest.
Nurse Foxhole: Started hating me, I guess.
Ms. Lachance: Because you're a disgusting piece of shit.
Forrest: .....
Forrest: ....Can you tell me what happened.
Ms. Lachance: No.
Forrest: ...Why?
Steph: You don't know, but... that's part of being a family. It's trust. He has
his reasons, and... and your grandparents have their own, you know? If... I mean
, if everything's the same as it was before, then yeah, drop him. But... everyon
e deserves a second chance, don't they?
Nurse Foxhole: ... It was... uh...
Gabby:
Forrest looks back at Foxhole

Nurse Foxhole: A fight over a hotdog.
Gabby shuts her eyes in thought, still remarkably tense
Nurse Foxhole: We were out and about...
And we bought a single hotdog.
And I ate it all, despite splitting it in half.
And when Rachel saw, she started swearing at me.
And screaming.
Gabby: ...I... God... What you're saying...
Nurse Foxhole: And acting like this.
Forrest: ......
rolling 3d20 +1
(
12
+
18
+
11
)+1
= 42
Gabby: ...I'd agree if it was... if it was anyone else, but...
Narrator : He's not lying.
Gabby pinches the bridge of her nose
Forrest: .....
Forrest: .....Is this true.
Ms. Lachance: Yes.
Ms. Lachance sneers at Foxhole
Ms. Lachance: It's because I always fucking hated you.
Steph: I know. I get that, Gab. It's just... something to think about, going int
o.
Ms. Lachance: Spineless.
Worthless.
Empty
Pathetic little worm.
Gabby: ...Yeah... Yeah, guess so...
Gabby sighs very deeply
Forrest: .....Why did you date.
Gabby: ...I dunno, Steph... Grandma and Grandpa, they're great. I... I wouldn't
have rather been raised by any other people, even if Dad wasn't a deadbeat scumf
rick...
...And... I'm luck. I'm so lucky. I have it great.
Ms. Lachance: Who the fuck are you? My therapist?
Gabby: Just great...
Space: this is super tense it's great
Gabby: I'm in high school at the age of fourteen, I... I have friends now, I'm g
ood at what I want to be good at...
Forrest: No, I'm not. I'm your student.
Gabby: I have... so many other, more important things to worry about that this s
tupid crap about a man who's basically little better than an annoying neighbor.
Other people have it way worse... Naomi, she's
Steph: ...
Gabby: ...I should... I should be worrying about her...!
Ms. Lachance: Why should I tell you anything.
Steph: Gabby, I think... I think that both you and I know this is really importa
nt.
Gabby:
Gabby huffs and paws at her temples again
Gabby: ...Might be... But it's not life-or-death... and God knows, there's a fri
ckin' plethora of that going around...
Forrest: .....Do you care about Ms. Lao.
Steph: Um...
Let me put it... I dunno, like this.
Ms. Lachance: What the fuck do you think?
Forrest: Then do it for her.
Steph: A million is a big number. Isn't it? Have you ever tried counting all the
way up there in one go?
Ms. Lachance: Why?
Gabby: ...Couple times, yeah... Ten entire ten thousands...
Ms. Lachance: What does this have to do with fucking anything!?
Mobile L: or wait fuck, I think I fucked that up
Hundred thousands, sorry
It's late and my brain rejects math
Space: i am the same way
Gabby: *hundred thousands
Steph: Yeah. Get a million dollars and you could, uh... if you use it responsibl
y you could pretty much not have to work for the rest of your life, probably.
Gabby slow nod
Forrest: You suspected Foxhole immediately. You got angry enough to beat him ove
r it, in school. In front of witnesses.
No one hates a person that much for absolutely no reason. And no one intimately
dates anybody they've always hated that much.
Steph: And a billion, that's even bigger, right? It just seems like the next ste
p up, but it's really not. It's... a thousand millions. Right? You know?
Ms. Lachance: Are you asking if he raped me?
Forrest: No. I'm asking what happened.
Ms. Lachance: He didn't.
Gabby nod nod nod
Steph: And that's so big, you can't really process that. Someone with a billion
dollars, they could just burn half of their money and still be richer than 90 pe
rcent of anyone we'll ever meet.
Ms. Lachance: I'm not telling you shit.
Steph: But, at the same time...
Ms. Lachance: I'd rather cut my own throat.
Steph: Does that make the million any smaller of a number?
Ms. Lachance: And if I ever have to stomach the sight of you again, it will be t
oo soon!
Ms. Lachance begins storming out
Gabby: ...No... It's... It's objectively huge...
Forrest tries to get in her way
Forrest: Please, wait.
Mobile L: dude he's gonna diiiiiie
Steph: Your problems matter, Gab. Even in the face of... you know, everything el
se, they matter.
Gabby:
Gabby shuts her eyes and sighs, softly
Gabby: ...Yeah... Guess so...
Ms. Lachance is absolutely furious

Ms. Lachance stares down at him, without words
Steph: Well... I mean, that's what I wanted to say.
Forrest stares up at her
Forrest not afraid, nor indignant
Forrest .....concerned
Gabby: ...You're probably right, Steph... I dunno...
Ms. Lachance: ...
Ms. Lachance begins trembling
Gabby: ...I'll, like... I'll give him half a shot and just hope he fricks back o
ff to Ontario or wherever it is he's staying now...
Steph: That's more than fair.
Ms. Lachance begins screaming
Ms. Lachance passes out
Forrest: ......!
Gabby: !!
Steph: --?!
Forrest: .......
Gabby: Wh... What the frick...
Steph: ...
Forrest looks down at her
Nurse Foxhole quickly begins tending to her
Forrest: .......
Nurse Foxhole: Jesus Christ...!
Forrest then looks at Foxhole
Gabby: ...Uhhh...!
Steph pokes her head into the nurse's office
Steph: What the fuck? What the fuck happened?
Forrest: ........
Gabby: ...Wh...
Forrest has a thought
Gabby:
Nurse Foxhole: She's passed out.
Had a nervous breakdown.
Forrest: ........
Gabby stares wide-eyed at her, then slowly turns her gaze to Forrest
Gabby:
Nurse Foxhole has made it so that his eyes cannot be seen past his shades
Nurse Foxhole: ...
Steph: ......
Nurse Foxhole: Must have been too much coffee.
Forrest quietly looks at Lachance
Nurse Foxhole picks her up and sets her on the examination bed
Forrest: ....
Steph looks at
Steph: It must
Gabby:
Nurse Foxhole:
... I'll drive
Forrest, then at Foxhole

have been a lot of coffee, if she was screaming like that.
We should take her to the hospital.
her.
Steph steps out of his way

Nurse Foxhole picks her up
Gabby:
Forrest watches him go
Forrest: .....
Gabby: ...What... What happened...?
Gabby deep, genuine worry
Steph: ...You were right, Gab. It really is a rough day for everyone.
Mr. Rosencrantz: ... God... I hope she's going to be okay...
Gabby:
Ms. Guildenstern: Rachel...
Mr. Pink: ...
Forrest: ......Mr. Rosencrantz. Miss Guildenstern.
Gabby now begins to wonder if that awful thing she wrote pushed her over the edg
e
Forrest: ......If this is inappropriate, I'm sorry, but I have a question.
Mr. Pink: it totally did
Gabby:
Narrator : They both look at him, stunned.
Forrest looks at them both
Gabby is all tense again
Forrest: .....Was Ms. Lachance.....always so angry.
Steph: ...Day's halfway over, Gab. Maybe tomorrow'll be better.
Gabby hhhhhhh no crying, you already had your fricking share...
Mr. Rosencrantz: ... No.
Steph folds her arms, deeply uncomfortable
Mr. Pink: No, no, shhh...
There's no need to cry.
Gabby:
Mr. Pink quickly tries to comfort her
Gabby takes a deep, tense breath and tries to stop herself, deeply ashamed
Forrest: .....
Mr. Pink: It's going to be alright, you understand?
Gabby nod... nod...
Ms. Guildenstern: ... She used to be really sweet, you know?
She was always the first to help, and she would joke and laugh- but...
Mr. Rosencrantz: ... She slowly got more and more...
Reclusive, and bitter, you know? Angry?
It started with strangers...
And then it became friends.
Gabby:
Steph: ...
Ms. Guildenstern: But she was always sweet for Foxhole.
... And then she started yelling at him, too..
Steph can't help but eavesdrop on this stuff
Ms. Guildenstern: ... She warmed up to us again, but never to him.
... I never thought she'd get like this...
Gabby removes her glasses to wipe her eyes, starting to breathe deeply
Mr. Pink: Shhh...
Forrest: .......Thank you.
Mr. Pink looks at the other two
Mr. Pink: Maybe you shouldn't be saying this to students...?
Forrest: That was my intent.
I'll keep quiet about this to the students, I promise.
Ms. Guildenstern: There's clearly something wrong, we might as well get the reco
rd straight, Mark.
Mr. Rosencrantz: ... I believe you.
Mr. Rosencrantz wrings his hands
Forrest: .......Has this happened to anyone else here?
People suddenly....changing.
Mr. Rosencrantz: Not except for Ms. Lao.
Forrest: ...I see. I understand.
Mr. Rosencrantz: But with her....
It wasn't the same.
Forrest: ..?
Mr. Rosencrantz: It was like, one week, we didn't see her, and when she got back
.
It's like a switch had flipped.
Forrest: ......She was gone for a week?
Mr. Rosencrantz: We didn't see her for a week.
Gabby:
Forrest: .....I see...
Forrest nods
Forrest: ...Thank you. This clears a lot up.
Mr. Rosencrantz nods
Mr. Rosencrantz: ...
Steph: ......
Mr. Rosencrantz: I think I'll tell the other staff about what happened.
Ms. Guildenstern: Wait for me.
Forrest watches them go, hands in his pockets
Gabby now has her composure back, sorta
Gabby:
Forrest 's eyes have a glimmer of determination
Steph: ...Fuck.
Forrest: .....There's work to be done.
Forrest goes to exit the nurse's office
Steph: Well, where? Where do we go from here?
Steph follows after him
Gabby: ...Is... Is that what you were asking her about? W-wait, and how's this r
elate to Ms. Lao...?
Forrest: I know where I go from here.

Narrator : However,
Gabby:
You're still in school.
and i'm calling it
Space: good shit man
Mobile L: JESUS CHRIST HOLY SHIT HOLY FUCK JESUS
Poor fucking Lachance
Mac D.: FORREST FREEMAN: COUGAR-HUNTING DETECTIVE
Narrator : any new perceptions on the npcs
Space: its really neat how the gab stuff and the lachance stuff seemed to sorta
parallel?
Mobile L: Suspicion of Foxhole: through the goddamn roof
Space: i trust foxhole less each day
Narrator : what do you suspect him of
Mac D.: i am actually the opposite
my suspicion of foxhole is now more hazy
Mobile L: I think there was at least some sort of abuse
Space: i don't think foxhole has done anything... shifty? but i don't think he's
a good person
Mobile L: Lao's thing might be supernatural in origin
Mac D.: because I am convinced that lachance's and lao's sudden changes could be
supernatural in origin
Space: i think it's a definite yes for lao
at this stage
lachance i'm not sure about...?
Mac D.: seer being revived with your soul being replaced with your archetype can
alter your personality yes
Narrator : yes
Mac D.: JUST
Narrator : when you say abuse
Mac D.: SAIYAN
Narrator : what do you think exactly
Space: so whats lao's archetype, The Depressive
Mobile L: Emotional abuse, maybe some physical. When Lachance withdrew, it remin
ded me of one of the hallmarks of abuse, the abused cuts ties with all but the a
buser as a sort of cloistering.
Perhaps whatever it was Foxhole did boiled down to cheating, and this is to unde
rscore the jacked up thing happened to Lachance and Lao.
Space: the hotdog thing seems like
y'know one of those things that seems minor but realy isn't?
in terms of emotional abuse-ish
Narrator : these little mysteries
Mobile L: I think it was either the straw that broke the camel's back, or just a
thing that got her new, supernaturally-influenced self upset enough to sever th
ings
Narrator : how do they all connect back to the greater whole
in the third heaven
there is a hotdog
Mac D.: Archetypes Suck
Space: this hot dog is what all men desire
Mobile L: But Mr. Mu doesn't need to eat hotdogs
Space: that's true
Narrator : so besides perceptions on foxhole being sketchy
and transformation and all that
what do yo uthink will happen next
Space: the club is the biggest group of maladaptive nerds i've ever seen in my l
ife i love them
Mac D.: we're due for another trip to Mister Bones' Wild Ride
Space: we Past due

Mobile L: I don't rightly know, but I feel so bad for Forrest and Mr. Hawthorne
Soooo bad
And I thought the little thing where Gab and Forrest bonded over punctuation was
incredibly sweet
Narrator : this has been a shitty day for all of these people
Mac D.: forrest feels determined don't worry about him
Narrator : lachance literally breaking down
Space: i respect martin witherburg
Mac D.: he got a Heroic Bonus instead of an Affliction
Mobile L: Valor
Space: trying to keep forrest from hall
Mac D.: forrest respects neither man
Narrator : i did not anticipate this course of events
Mac D.: witherburg is using the student body as pawns in his orange globular war
Mobile L: I expect whatever happens with Douglas to be remarkably tense
Mac D.: forrest will fight this oppression
Narrator : these sorts of reveals were not intended to come about at this point
Forrest: detective work, baby B)
Space: it's all thanks to pure happenstance
Space looks directly at gabby's paper
Narrator : forrest, due to his aggressive investigation
sent a teacher into a complete meltdown
also all the roll20 maps that have been made that aren't secret ought to be mess
aged to me
so i have many location
Mobile L: Roger dodger
Mac D.: i'm impressed she didn't just hit forrest and went on her way
i was actually typing out "hit me if it helps" as seer hit the scream button
Narrator : lachance has her reasons
Mobile L: :,(
Mac D.: "you remind me of my pet rabbit. he too was fat"
Narrator : in her gm notes is the brief summary of everything
and if you read it
it would all make sense
Mobile L: !
Shiiiit I gotta get to sleep now, have an 11-7 tomorrow ahahaha
Space: #pray4mobile
Mac D.: btw social link level up rite :^^^)
Space makes someone collapse into a screaming mental breakdown
Space social rank up!
Narrator : things that are hard to picture:
cheery, happy ms lachance
Mobile L: Hey, he's at least leveled up his social link with Gab
Mac D.: forrest is determined to learn why she is no longer Cheery-Happy and is
now Angry-Screamy
Mobile L: Sleep4real. Gud nacht, kinder
Narrator : yes
Mac D.: rest woman
Narrator : good night
Space: slumber
Mac D.: can you just imagine
lachance screaming and passing out at forrest's feet
he looks down at her, then looks at the camera
and the social link rank up jingle plays
Mr. Mu: RANKU AWP!!
Forrest: man friendships progress in a weirder way than i expected
Mac D.: i'm curious if this has anything to do with the fact that Forrest does n
ot Hate her
Steph: see now you know the secret
Forrest: so all i need to do is make you cry and we'll be bffs
Mr. Mu: i was pleased when forrest showed concern
Steph: it's why i regularly diss america when im around you
Mac D.: cause it stuck out to me when he talked to her the first time
that she didn't seem to understand why forrest bothered
Mr. Mu: yes
you caught it
Space: forrest isn't a phony like foxhole
Mr. Mu: i'm not just trying to imply things that no one recieves
Forrest: ms. lachance i noticed you dropped your pen way back there so i came to
bring it back
ms lachance please stop throwing things at me
Steph: i'm curious to see mr. glass's final evaluation
Forrest: steph stop peeking over the invisible ceilings
Steph: oh this isn't how you do things in america??????????????
Mr. Mu: yeah roland is going to
Forrest: what's you're country's mascot animal again
Mr. Mu: see some shit
the national animal is officially the beaver
Forrest: wow
the beaver
Steph: forrest the gm confirmed that bad things are going to happen this week
Forrest: unbelieveable
Mr. Mu: for roland
look at him
Mac D.: haiight it's 2 in th AM so i'm gonna get some much-needed rest
Space: goode nite
Mr. Mu: yes i will go too
Mac D.: FEEEELS GOOD TO THIRD HEAVEN AGAIN
Space: gode nit
Mr. Mu: good night, and i will see you all on the other side
Space: ye it doo
Mobile L: YEAAAAH ROLL20 CON, GET IN THE BALLPIT BOYYYYYZ
Space: fucking fascist
Space: you heard me
eldritch s. (GM): why fascist
also yess ballpit
someone needs to shit in it
Space: all this stuff about 'lenin'
its deep cover
Mobile L jizzes in the ballpit
eldritch s. (GM): who here
Space: https://roll20con.net/
eldritch s. (GM): would have done to dashcon
what npcs
Space: naomi
Mobile L: All the weebs
Space: steph would have gone if someone else asked her to
Mobile L: Gabby would have just scoffed at this display of degeneracy
Mac D.: boop
eldritch s. (GM): what are your char's social networks of choice
Space: steph has a livejournal
Mac D.: forrest doesn't use social media outside of his own blog
Steph: hey forrest if you give me another twelve dollars i'll link to your blog
in my livejournal
Mobile L: Gabby thinks text messages are distracting today's youth

eldritch s. (GM): what is forrest's blog hosted on
Mobile L: Wordpress, I'd guess
Space: its html on his own personal web server
Mac D.: ya what space said
Space: i'm no fool
Mobile L: Next level shit
eldritch s. (GM): what the fuck
doesn't that costm oney
Space: everything in this world costs someone money... whether it's You, or The
Man... but only You can have the ability to speak the truth
Narrator : And with that ordeal of a lunch out of the way, your have to move on
with school.
Your next class is... history, Jesus Chirst!
Gabby pleaaase drag on forever, school, please let me never see my father
Forrest still has the incident with Lachance and Foxhole weighing heavily on his
mind
Steph dreads everything and wants the day to be done
Forrest wonders who is going to be subbing today, With Foxhole gone.....
Gabby ...ahh motherfricker...
Forrest: ....?
Roland Glass is a anemic-ish, greasy-haired pencil pusher, writing things down o
n a clipboard
Forrest: .......
Forrest has a seat
Roland Glass: Don't mind me, students.
My name is Mr. Glass, I'm hear for the School Board.
*here
Forrest: ....
Gabby still immensely pities this poor fricker
Roland Glass: I'm going to be doing some light observation, that's all.
Ms. Lao: ...
Steph: ...
Steph gets her class materiel out
Ms. Lao looks forward for a moment, blankly contemplating nothing
Gabby ...ahhh man... Ms. Lao...
Ms. Lao: ... I think I can make it through this one.
Forrest: ............
Forrest watches her like a hawk
Gabby tries to give Ms. Lao vibes of encouragement
Ms. Lao: We're going to be moving to...
The English Civil War.
Forrest: ...
Ms. Lao: It began with...
Steph: ...
Steph this is going to end in tears
Gabby ...you can do it, Ms. Lao...

Steph tears and blood
Gabby c-c'mon...
Forrest: ...
Ms. Lao: The coronoation of King James I, of the Stuart dynasty, following the d
eath of Elizabeth I of the Tudors, daughter of... who?
Steph:
Normal Mind Test
" "
Lower Margin: 11
Upper Margin: 10
Result:
(
17
+
12
+
17
)+1
= 47
Steph: fuck i forgot to use my cool macros
Ms. Lao: steph just blanked
Forrest hand raise
Gabby:
Normal Mind Test
"11 "
Lower Margin: 8
Upper Margin: 13
Result:
Ms. Lao: duff do you know who elizabeth's papa was
forrest goes first
(
10
+
8
+
11
)+1
= 30
Mac D.: iiii'm hen-u-ree the eighth i am
Ms. Lao looks at him
Forrest: King Henry VIII.
Steph: ....
Steph yeah
Steph that guy
Gabby i GAVE you that one, Forrest, don't forget it...!
Ms. Lao: Yes.
James I wasn't very friendly with Parliament.
And...
Space: i'm surprised that duff knows this
Ms. Lao proceeds on with the bulk of the lesson
Ms. Lao: what
do you think
he's
retarded
Space: it doesn't seem like something that he'd know about
Ms. Lao: he graduated highschool
Mac D.: actually i just looked it up on wikipedia :^)
Ms. Lao: you fucking shit
oh
fuck you
Space: oh well would you look at that seer
Mac D.: :^^^)
Space: a 'fucking shit' am i
Mobile L: I knew it was Henry, and I haven't read up on that shit in 5ever
Ms. Lao: duff is actually just retarded
Mac D.: i don't give a shit about britbong royalty
and i never will
Steph takes notes on the lesson
Ms. Lao: he's the one who killed all his wive
Mac D.: oh that i know
Steph is at least glad that lao isn't losing it completely
Ms. Lao finishes telling them history
Ms. Lao: ...
Forrest pays rapt attention to this less. More rapt than usual.
Forrest: *lesson
Ms. Lao: So it all...
Didn't mean anything.
The Lord-Protector, Cromwell, ruled like a king.
Mobile L intent writening
Ms. Lao: Died, and the monarchy was restored.
Gabby no me
Ms. Lao: Under Charles II.
Steph draws a little cromwell in the margins
Ms. Lao: It was all meaningless.
Gabby:
Steph quietly makes a mental note of this
Ms. Lao: ... No assigned questions today.
Ms. Lao looks down at her desk
Steph looks at Ms. Lao
Forrest: .....
Forrest raises a hand
Ms. Lao coughs into a hanky
Ms. Lao: ... What...
Gabby just tries not to show the worry visibly

Forrest: ...Did Cromwell and his reign have any sort of lasting influence.
Ms. Lao: Not his reign.
It was what inspired Thomas Hobbes to write about the need for tyranny and the e
vil of humanity.
Gabby ...ooh! NOTE-TAKE
Ms. Lao: And, eventually, the monarchs lost their power anyway, peacefully, maki
ng the entire war useless to either side.
Cromwell had his son appointed as Lord-Protector, until the Monarchists deposed
him, so he utterly failed in every idea that the republicans had.
Gabby:
Steph: ...That, uh, that basically seems like another kind of king in all but na
me.
Gabby: Yeah...
Ms. Lao: It was.
Forrest: ....I've read that he was one of the influences of Leon Trotsky
Ms. Lao: Leon Trotsky...
People pose him as the alternative to Stalin.
But he would have been just as bad.
Gabby nod nod, frick commies
Ms. Lao: He was just as fanatical and determined- but Stalin was better at backs
tabbing than he was.
Lenin tried to promote people based on merit, but Stalin used the traditional ro
ute of informal factions and patronage, and so he dominated the party.
By the end, all the revolutionary leaders of Red October were dead.
... For them, it was all meaningless.
Trading one form of misery for another.
And then they did it again with the fall of the Soviet Union.
Ms. Lao: That's all it is...
Gabby ...ah frick... why'd Ms. Lao have to get involved with history and not som
ething, like... invigorating and upbeat like geometry?
Gabby the fricking humanites
Gabby *humanities
Steph takes a brief look to see what the other students are thinking about this
hour
Jasper is just reading the textbook
Forrest: ....Do you think they would have been better off as an eternal autocrac
y.
Ken is quietly concerned
Ms. Lao: That never changed.
From start to finish, they have been in a state of autocracy.
From Ivan the Terrible to Stalin to Yeltsin.
it is a never-changing state of misery.
Nathan is chewing his lip
Suzie quietly listens
Jason looks like he's about to cry
Gabby tries very hard to remain stern and confident-looking even though she too
is super concerned
Anton :C
Space: jason...
Vlad is blatantly texting
Mobile L: Shitlord
Vlad mutters in Hungarian
Mobile L: Hungarian shitlord
Forrest: .....Why do you think they go on, then.
Ms. Lao: Because the alternative is to lie down and die.
Steph: ...
Aren't things looking up for them though? In Russia? It can't just be... y'know,
doom and gloom all the time...
Ms. Lao: It always is.
Their economy is on the verge of collapse.
And their regime is as corrupt and unshakable as ever.
There is no threat, because the military, Oligarchs, mobsters, and bureaucrats a
re all the same people.
And they will continue doing what they like, while the people support it.
Roland Glass writes something down
Steph doesn't know enough about Russia to refute this in any way
Steph: ...
Mobile L is too uninterested in history to try and think of a bright 'n sunny su
bject change
Ms. Lao: wow
Gabby FRICK MY LIFE
Ms. Lao: That's just the way the world is.
People love making themselves and others miserable.
Forrest: .......I disagree.
Gabby looks to Forrest
Steph: Yeah.
Forrest: The human race is thousands of years old. No regime or state of the wor
ld is ever permanent.
Ms. Lao: People live.
They die.
They ate.
*eat
They breath.
*breathe
Ms. Lao: That's permanent.
People suffer, they always have and always will.
Steph: Well, isn't there a lot less suffering now than there was, like... I dunn
o, a thousand years ago? We're getting there. Eventually.
Gabby: ...Yeah. Yeah, like, infant mortality, and human longevity in developed c
ountries.
Ms. Lao: Developed.
Steph: Even in developing countries, though... there's a reason they're called '
developing' and not 'declining.'
Gabby: But... No, see, when you provide crap even as basic as education and jobs
for women, it starts... You get development. India's moving up, some African cou
ntries, a lotta Asian ones...
Ms. Lao: A development is neither good nor bad.
A development is a change.
You have these countries that try to become developed, but they can't.
They're too poor, too dysfunctional.

They're not meant to succeed, it's impossible.
There is always a situation in which you can't win.
Steph frowns
Ms. Lao: And any option you chose will make things worse.
Gabby:
Gabby :c
Forrest: There are situations where you can't win. But that doesn't mean you can
never win.
Ms. Lao: In many lifetimes.
Forrest: Yes.
But it's through the knowledge passed down from those lifetimes that allows it t
o happen.
Forrest: ....
Gabby nod no... Ahh frick. Now she'll NEVER get to talk about the incredibly fast
progression from the invention of the wheel to the airplane after tens of thous
ands of years of walking...
Narrator : Next up is... Math!
Gabby YEAAAA BOIIIII
Forrest hooo boi
Gabby some gentle relief from this bad awful stupid dumb terrible day that SUCKS
Gabby gets out the MATHING IMPLEMENTS
Narrator begins teaching a class on Parabolas
Narrator : the teach does
Gabby MY FRIENDS
Narrator : she sends out rapid notes, roll to copy down
{{(
5
+
5
+
5
)}}+0
= 5
(
14
+
2
+
7
)+1
= 24
Space: sorry just had a hueg coffing fit
Mobile L: Ahh heck, you okay?
Space: ye i was just betrayed by these 'garlic bagel chips'
(
6
+
14
+
13
)+1
= 34
Space: trying to strangulate me
Narrator : Forrest is the only one who manages to keep up and keep the notes ade
quate.
Forrest: ....
Mrs. Plumber: Now, you can all make groups to work on this next assignment.
It's an experiment I'm doing.
Steph really needs to learn hwo to write in shorthand
Gabby ..ahhh bless you Miss Plummer, helping me out on this, my darkest day
Gabby whyyyy can't I FRCIKING COPY DOWN BASIC MATH FRIFK FRICK FRICK FRIIIIICK
Forrest wow this shit is easy
Forrest: ...?
Forrest notices Gabby about to blow a gasket
Gabby sloooowly looks to Forrest, just with this look like she's disappointed in
God and the universe and herself
Forrest: .....
....What's wrong.
Gabby: ...I frickin' Gahhh, I should know this, but I just know I jacked my notes
up.
Thisthis my favorite subject and everything...
Mac D.: ....You can look at mine if you want.
Forrest: nah fam look at mine
Forrest shows Gab his IMPECCABLY-TAKEN NOTES
Steph looks at her own notes
Steph and figures she can just ask gabby for hers later
Gabby: ...Ooh, frick, uh... Thanks!
Gabby OGLE
Gabby YEAH THIS IS ACCURATE, FRICK YEAH, SMART NEW FRIEND
Gabby: ...You're a fricking natural, you know that?
Have you considered going into STEM?
Forrest: ......Not really.
Normally, math is my weakest subject.
Gabby: ...Wow. I guess Ms. Plumber's pretty good at explaining it, right?
But, like, really, someone who just flat-out sucks wouldn't get there, I don't t
hink. God, you're... You're real smart. You're fricking sharp as frick.
Forrest: ....I don't think I'm STEM smart.
...And I'm certainly not "skip grades" smart.
Gabby: ...Well... Well, like, still though. You're not gonna know until you hit c
ollege, right? Even if you're not, like, destined to be an engineer or a chemist
or something, there's gotta be some promising area for you.
Space: is seer live or die
Mobile L: A good question
Mrs. Plumber: i am watching got and looking back here also
i intended for you to mostyl do free interact for this bit
Forrest: ...I don't think I'm cut out to be any of those things.
Gabby: ...If you're sure... I mean... You're the one who knows how your brain wo
rks best, probably, andand, like... You probably already kinda know where you wan
na go... Don't you?
Steph has quietly taken to listening to their conversation
Gabby is copying down Forrest's notes while she speaks
Forrest: .......
Forrest doesn't answer that
Steph: ...I'm going to be an author.
Forrest: ...
Gabby: ...Well... You've got time. I'm not even sure what specific area I'm goin
g into yet, really. I mean, biology is frickin' fascinating as crap, but so is c
omputer engineering, and so is aerospace engineering, and
...You've got time, seriously. Just... Just be thinking about it, yeah?
Gabby small, attemptedly reassuring smile
Forrest: ....
Gabby: I mean... Steph, do you know what genre or whatever you're gonna be in?
Steph: Well... I mean, yeah, it's like what Gabby's saying, there's a whole worl
d of options out there.
Forrest: ....I'll figure it out eventually, I'm sure
Forrest just wants to drop the subject
Gabby: ...Yeah, 'course. And, like, whatever choice you make... You're gonna be
frickin' awesome, y'know? I just know it.
Forrest: right, yeh.
Forrest REALLY wants to drop the subject
Steph: ...So, uh...
...Read any... good books?
Forrest: There were those book on autistic sexual education I read at the librar
y last week.
*books
Steph: I bet that was useful stuff.
Gabby: ...Youyou actually read that?
Gabby D:
Forrest: Yeah, I picked a random book at the library to read. And those were the
ones I grabbed.
Steph rests her chin on her hands
Steph: Well, now you know more than anything we've learned in health class.
Forrest: Mm/
Gabby: ...Um... Is it, like... Are there...
...Naked pictures and stuff in that thing...?
Forrest: Yeah.
It wouldn't make sense for a sex ed book to not have visual aids.
Gabby: ...Ohhh frick, ewww! H-how'd you stand that nasty crap? Like-like... Real
ly badly autistic kids, wouldn't that just make 'em get all...
...Uhhh... Frisky...?
Forrest: What?
Gabby: I mean... Okay, like, if they see a frickin' dong or a boob, wouldn't it j
ust make them wanna... wanna do the fricking?
Gabby is kinda getting red in the face just thinking about this
Steph: Gabby, do you get frisky when you see stuff like that?
Forrest: I would assume the book is more fore the parents of autistic children.
Are implying that she's autistic, Steph.
*you
Gabby: ...Ehhh... I, uh...
Steph: No, I'm not. It just makes sense that if... y'know, if she doesn't, then
they wouldn't either.
...
Gabby: ...No... Sex pictures just make me embarrassed...
Steph: See, there you go.
Gabby this poor child, why is she in high school
Forrest: .....You're twelve, right.
Gabby: ...Fourteen.
Gabby fricking asian youthfulness
Forrest: .....How much of middle school did you have.
Gabby: ...Like... Not much of one, I don't guess. I skipped, like, a crapton of
grades.
Forrest: ..I see.
Steph: You didn't miss much.
Forrest: Probably missed sex ed.
Narrator : The bell goes again.
Mrs. Plumber gives a terse goodbye
Forrest: ...
Narrator : last
period
and
it's
science
Steph thank god
Forrest so close to freedom...~
Steph thank jesus, thank god
Gabby pleaaaase drag on, dear German teacher
Gabby: ...I can... I can probably just learn about that from Grandma and Grandpa
, though.
Gabby ohhh dear... OLD PEOPLE...
Mr. Schmidt: Now, kinder!
Forrest: ...
Mr. Schmidt: My brother, I've been unable to get a conclusion on that black matt
er lodged in the pig...
He doesn't now.
*know
Forrest oh right the creepy pig they mentioned
Mr. Schmidt: So I'll have to examine it further myself, wich is what I will be d
oing during the class as you work on this review sheet- the next class will be a
test, you see?
Mr. Schmidt takes out a ziplock bag with a black lump in it and places it on his
desk
Mr. Schmidt begins handing out worksheets
Gabby is just gonna take her sweeeeeeeeet time on this here worksheet
Mr. Schmidt begins examining the lump with his microscope
Roland Glass looks over his shoulder at it

Forrest worksheet time
(
17
+
12
+
2
)+1
= 32
Steph takes it easy with the worksheet
{{(
19
+
16
+
20
)}}+0
= 19
Narrator : Organic Chemistry! :)
Space: roland looks really creepy standing like that
(
20
+
14
+
12
)+1
= 47
back on top SUCKAZZZZ
Narrator : It's easy.
Mac D.: roland's arm has become schmidt's mustache
Narrator : Schmidt is a very good teacher, clearly.
i noticed that too
Gabby YEAHHHH oh wait this means meandering isn't easy... FRICK
Narrator : it's a glimpse into his youth
Mr. Schmidt: ... Mein Gott!
Steph looks up
Steph: What is it?
Mr. Schmidt: This is...
Unreal...!
Gabby: ...Huh? Like... how so Mr. Schmidt?
Mr. Schmidt: The makeup of these cells...
Forrest: .....
Mr. Schmidt: I-I can't find... this is hardly a cell at all!
Gabby: ...Can I see?
Gabby is frickin' fascinated now
Mr. Schmidt: Sure, sure, come on.
Gabby SCURRIES UP with youthful vigor
Gabby a-PEEEEEP
(
14
+
7
+
20
)+1
= 42
B)
Steph looks back at Forrest
Narrator : The composition of that substance...
The sheer...
Forrest: ...?
Narrator : Awfulness...
Forrest glances at Steph
Gabby: ..........
Narrator : Gabby feels a deep unease clasp her heart.
Gabby: ...Ghhh!
Narrator : It reminds her of the Nihilist that nearly murdered her.
Gabby: ...........
Mac D.: murdered her
Steph: Should we...?
Mac D.: more like made her blow up the entire school in righteous anger
Narrator : no there was
Space: there was one before you joined
Narrator : at the start
Space: that honest to god
Mobile L: Nah, see, this was back when Naomi bit it
Space: nearly killed gab
Mac D.: oh dear
Narrator : they all fucking left her
alone
Steph: lol bye
Mac D.: nice job
steph
Narrator : with the nihilist
Mobile L: A small, defenseless Vietnamese girl
Narrator : The darkness...
Steph: hey my weeb friend got her skull crushed right in front of me
Mac D.: how the fuck does she not resent them for that
Steph: you would run
Narrator : It is like the horrible liquid that flowed from the Nihilist's wounds
Mobile L: She's just so freaked out by it, she doesn't even want to think about
it too hard. That and Naomi actually died
Gabby: ..........
Narrator : her head was crushed
Forrest: ....
Forrest looks at Gabby freakin out up there
Narrator : i rolled the die on a dare from fawkes to see if she shit herself whe
n she die
d
Gabby is pale as a sheet
Mobile L: Did she?
Narrator : yes
Forrest: .....Gabby.
Forrest gets out from his desk and walks up to Her and The Pig as well
Gabby: ...Gh! Wh... Yeah...?
Narrator : it's not the pig
just a black lump of shit
Forrest The Pig Shit
Forrest: Are you alright? You looked like you were going to faint.
Steph looks at the two of them from where she sits
Mr. Schmidt: It is fairly gruesome, I mus admit.
Gabby: ...O-oh, uh... Yeah, just, fricking, um... This is really... Disturbing f
rom a biological standpoint...
Mr. Schmidt: It is...
Forrest: ....
Forrest looks at it
Steph: ...Can I see?
Mr. Schmidt: I worry about it.
Steph goes over
Mr. Schmidt: Sure, sure, come along.
Gabby clearly there is something more that she isn't blurting out in polite comp
any
Forrest mental note
Mr. Schmidt: roll mind steph
Gabby gives Forrest and Steph a brief look like "talk to me after class"
Forrest: do i roll mind too coach
Mr. Schmidt: you didn't look through the microscope
Forrest: oh, right
Forrest goes to look thru the microscope
Mr. Schmidt: steph is using it
you have to wait
Gabby tries to get back the Spocklike composure
{{(
7
+
1
+
16
)}}+0
= 7
Forrest: i throw her out the window
Mr. Schmidt: Steph think it's nasty.
Gabby: nyeheheh, YOU SUCK
Mr. Schmidt: Forrest now roll
Steph: ...So is it, like... a tumor?
(
15
+
2
+
5
)+1
= 23
Mr. Schmidt: I really could not tell you.
Gabby: i am queen of science
Steph steps back from the microscope
Gabby deeeep breaths... think of grandma and grandpa...
Mac D.: and how the nihilists will squish THEIR heads
Gabby NOOOOO NEVER
Mr. Schmidt: forrest knowsn othing
Forrest: fuck you i know stuff
.....
Forrest looks back at Gabby, not getting it
Mr. Schmidt: ...
If you'll excuse me...
Gabby just shoots him a very deeply worried look like "i know exactly what this
is"
Mr. Schmidt sneaks back into using the microscope
Steph: ...
Steph looks at Gabby now, too
Forrest: ......
Roland Glass quickly resumes peering over his shoulder
Steph is very clearly concerned
Gabby shoots Steph the self-same look. Guess she skipped that many grades for a
reason.
Roland Glass: ... Looks like this morning's coffee...
Forrest: ......Mr. Schmidt, could I go get a drink of water
.
Steph: ...
Steph nods in understanding
Mr. Schmidt: Yes, yes.
Steph: Gross, huh?
Forrest: Thank you.
Gabby: ...Um... While he mentions it, can I go to the bathroom?
Forrest walks out, waiting on Gabster
AAAAAAAA
Mr. Schmidt: Yes, yes...
Mobile L: Wot
Space: scroll down
Roland Glass: Eugh...
Mac D.: "BACKUP BACKUP FAT KID SIGHTED
they all tackle forrest to the ground
Steph: ...Uh, I left my eraser in my locker?
Roger Perkins nudges Quest
Forrest: ...?
Forrest looks over at The Cop, Nahmen Jayden.....and HIM.....
Gabby nods and heads into the hallway as well and OH GOD FRICK IT
Gabby:
Mac D.: what's that western theme that plays when jaime and stark lock eyes
Gabby MMMMWELP. LAAAAADIES ROOM~
Gabby DASH, doing her very convincing pee dance
Forrest: ....?
Roger Perkins: that's not plying
Forrest sees Gabby wiggle off and goes to pursue
Roger Perkins: That's the one.
Officer Quest: Stop, please.
Forrest stops, mid-step
Forrest: ........
Forrest looks back
Mr. Schmidt doesn't even answer
Forrest: ....
Steph: ...
Gabby looks over her shoulder before she enters the wimmin's room, and... oh fri
ck...
Forrest: ....Is something the matter, Officer.
Steph gives him a thumbs-up, heading for the door
Steph: ...
Officer Quest: I'd just like to ask you some questions.
Gabby ducks in there quickly to preserve her cover
Steph stops just before heading out
Forrest: .....Alright, then.
Officer Quest: Come with me.
Gabby: (...Ahhhhh FRICK)
Forrest: ....Is there a reason they can't be asked here, Officer.
Officer Quest: I would like to keep this private, there is an investigation goin
g on.
Forrest: .....
......Alright.
Steph: ...
Forrest is being fenced in by fat man and nahmen anyway
Steph waits for them to leave so she can try regrouping with the Gab
Gabby tries to devise an exit strategy in her stall
Gabby:
...God... Uh...
Gabby runs over to wash her hands and exit the restyroom before anything irrepar
able happens
Officer Quest begins walking with military precision down the hall
Forrest follows
Gabby:
Steph: ...
Steph now's her chance
Forrest: ....
Steph tries sneaking to the restroom
Forrest looks behind him at the men cutting him off
Officer Quest sits down in Mr. Hall's chair
Space: do i roll or do i refrain from the roll
Officer Quest: roll
Space: rolling {{3d20dl1}dh1} + 1
{{(
20
+
11
+
12
)}}+1
= 13
Forrest: .....
Officer Quest: Now.
Space: praise
Officer Quest: she sneaks by the two stooges
Steph hurriedly enters el bano
Officer Quest: How much do you know about the Second Heaven.
Gabby sees Steph a comin'
Steph: Hhhhhhholy shit.
Gabby:
Forrest: ....Well, in religious studies, they tell you that if you're good your
whole life...
Shady Man: Don't try that with us.
Forrest: Try what.
Gabby just has that blank look of someone completely terrified and trying to com
pose her thoughts
Roger Perkins: Listen, kid.
The game's up.
Forrest: ...I don't know what you mean.
Gabby: ...Um. What are they doing to Forrest...?
Forrest looks at Quest
Forrest: Officer, who are these men.
Roger Perkins: You don't get an Archetype without any reason- we're both intelli
gent people.
Steph: They were... questioning him?
Officer Quest: Detectives.
Gabby: ...They can'tthey can't, like, go and shoot him on school grounds, can the
y...?
Forrest: I don't understand the questions they're asking.
Officer Quest: Yes you do.
Steph: ...It's... yeah, it's the middle of the day.
Officer Quest: I'll ask you to answer them honestly.
Steph: Broad daylight, really.
Forrest: Frankly, I feel threatened, and I would like to be questioned somewhere
with witnesses.
Gabby: ...God. We... We have to...
Officer Quest: No.

Gabby does the throat-slitting motion
Officer Quest: If you make a sound, I will be forced to silence you.
Please do not force the situation.
Gabby: ...Before they... get more rash...
Steph: No. No way.
Forrest: I'm not entirely sure that's legal, Officer.
Officer Quest: No.
Forrest: Am I being accused of a crime, here.
Gabby: ...What ifwhat if they come after our families, Steph?
Officer Quest: This is above the law.
Shady Man: Stop testing my patience.
Steph: We deal with that then. But this is a public place, and they're the ones
in authority. If we do something, we are in -- a lot of trouble.
Shady Man: We can do this here and now, or we can drag it out.
Steph: And not to mention... they're more experienced than us.
Gabby: ...Wh... Hey, I don't mean now. I mean soon...
Roger Perkins: Please, kid, we can help you.
Forrest: I don't understand what you're talking about at all. Try explaining it
to me in layman's terms.
Gabby: When we can... Get 'em... In an, um... In a place.
Roger Perkins kneels down next to him
Roger Perkins: I know this all must be...
Disturbing.
To stumble into another world...
To find a masked man, who offers you power...
To fight for survival...
Forrest: Being trapped in a room with three frightening-looking men is disturbin
g, yes.
Roger Perkins: And now to have us questioning you...
But you have to understand that we are trying to help you.
Steph: ...Aah... god damn it.
Roger Perkins: And if you do what we ask, everything will be alright.
Forrest: Is that right.
Steph: Gabby, y-- do you realize what we're talking about here?
Roger Perkins: I promise you.
I know this seems preposterous,and that I'm a liar.
(
6
+
15
+
16
)+1
= 38
Roger Perkins sincerely means what he's saying
Forrest: .......
Gabby: ...Yeah. They fricking... tried it with us first. They tried to kill us,
Steph, and they'll hit us where it hurts the most, and where it hurts the most i
s being hit right in the family.
Forrest narrows his eyes. The other two are still unknowns
Forrest: ....What exactly is this "investigation" for.
Steph: Could you do it?
Officer Quest: Officially, we are looking for the source of the missing students
.
Steph: I couldn't, and I don't think you could either.

Forrest: Right, I've heard about her.
Shady Man: But we already know where they are.
They're dead.
Gabby hastily nods before Steph can say the second part
Forrest: That's hard to prove without a body.
Shady Man: They died in that world you went to.
We know because we went there.
We're trying to stop this insanity.
Gabby: ...Steph. I could. I am a descendant of people who have probably killed a
t a younger age.
Steph: ...Jesus, Gabby.
Gabby just has the stern, but foolhardy look of a young soldier who has no idea
what she's saying
Forrest: This sounds like a bad hallucination.
Gabby: ...I... I hate death, Steph, and I fricking hate the idea... You know thi
s. I want... More than anything, that death is... is stopped someday... And I don
't wanna dispense it...
Officer Quest looks from side to side
Officer Quest: ...
Gabby: ...But... What are we gonna do with 'em, huh?
Officer Quest: I don't like being here for too long.
Gabby: Like, put 'em in a cage...?
Officer Quest: I can feel its presence...
Shady Man: You know who he's talking about?
Your worst nightmare.
Steph: I don't know! I don't know what we're supposed to do! This is a bad situa
tion, Gabby, and anything we do is going to be the wrong decision.
Forrest: No sir, I do not. But if it's as serious as it sounds, you should waste
no time in skeedaddling.
You know, for your safety.
Steph: Right now, the only thing we can do -- is choose something less bad. Do y
ou understand?
Shady Man: It's a demon without a face, who's going to kill you if you waste any
time.
Hurry up, tell us everything you know so we can fill you in on the rest.
Forrest: Sounds horrifying.
Shady Man: I don't like playing games.
Forrest: I'm not a fan of them either, Sir. Especially with strangers.
Gabby: Well... What's badder than them coming after your grandpa? After my grand
pa, and my grandma...?
Gabby 's eyes start to glaze over with a thin film of tears
Officer Quest: Roger.
Roland Glass: Listen...
fdr
Forrest: Is that your name?
Roger Perkins: Listen...
Gabby: ET TU, ROLAND?
Roger Perkins: Yes- my name's Roger Perkins.
Steph: ...Hey, hey...
Forrest: That's a nice name.
Roger Perkins: Yours is...
Roger Perkins looks at him
Forrest: Nice name for a nice man.
Steph: ...Gabby, listen, okay?
Roger Perkins 's eyes briefly flash

Roger Perkins: Forrest Freeman.
Forrest: .......
Gabby: ........
Steph: We don't know what's going to happen. Okay? We don't know that.
Roger Perkins: Hoboken...
A younger sister...
Forrest: ......
Roger Perkins: ... Hm...
Steph: You -- you can't kill someone in cold blood just... just on an educated g
uess. What if your guess is wrong?
What then?
Gabby: .......
...I...
...I...
Roger Perkins: Listen, we're not going to hurt you or beat you or threaten you.
Gabby: ...II dunno, Steph... O-oh God... II dunno...
Roger Perkins: We don't want to get information, we just want to give you some.
Forrest: Oh, that's good. Because that would be really immoraly.
Okay, I'm listening.
Gabby gabby you frick, can you do anything that's not crying under stress
Roger Perkins: But first, we need to know what you know, so we don't waste time.
Forrest: I'm not really in a position to leave, so I'll hear you out.
Roger Perkins: And what exactly you've been through.
Steph: We'll work something out.. We'll come up with a plan.
Okay?
Gabby:
Forrest: Well, let's see.....today,
Gabby small nod
Forrest: *Today, I was forcibly drafted into a basketball team against my will,
and then I was kidnapped and beaten until I agreed to join a sinking club. Again
st my will.
A couple days back, I was nearly accused of attempted murder by a con artist.
Officer Quest: Keep the information pertinent.
I am talking specifically about the other world you entered through the shed out
side.
Gabby: ...Should... Should I go ahead and, uhhhh... tell you the, uhhh... the th
ing...?
Forrest: Oh, right, the shed.
Steph: Yeah. Let's focus on that for now.
Gabby: ...Okay...
Gabby swallows hard
Forrest: I went snooping around there when I was looking into a mysterious explo
sion that hit this school some decades back.
Gabby: ...It, um...
...I looked at it...
Forrest: You guys know anything about that?

Officer Quest: We do.
Gabby: ...I was... That stuff the mass is made of...
Forrest: Neat. I hope the case is still being looked into, Officer.
Officer Quest: It is.
Forrest: Fantastic.
Officer Quest: It is connected to the nature of the other world.
Gabby: ...I don't have a doubt that it's the same crap that came from the Nihili
sts...
Officer Quest: Though we still don't have all the information that we need.
Steph: ...
Forrest: Now, I'm very scared at this point, and am willing to go along with wha
tever nutbar statements you people make. So, yes, sirs, I HAVE been to this hypo
thetical "other world".
Steph: So... and it's what was in the pig.
Forrest: What hypothetical information about this hypothetical "other world" do
you guys have to tell me.
Gabby: ...Y-yeah... The same back... a-awful stuff that comes out when you kill
'em, and they bleed...
Officer Quest: You met a man in a mask, who introduced himself and gave you powe
rs.
Did you ask him any questions.
Forrest: Riiiight, riiiiight. Ahh.....No, I can't say I did.
Officer Quest: You know that he is named Mr. Mu.
Mobile L: Forrest is amazing
Shady Man: ...
Steph: Okay, so we need to find out what this suggests.
Forrest: Of course I do, Officer. Absolutely.
Shady Man: The child is playing around with us.
Space: so does
shady man
have the whole norman jayden accent
Shady Man: yes
it's reall weird
Space: god fucking bless
Shady Man: If it's all the same to you, I say next time it comes, we just toss h
im to the Nihilists.
I'm not letting some brat get in our way.
Forrest: Oh, mercy, not the.....What'd you call them.
Not the NEPHILIM.
Roger Perkins looks at Quest appealingly
Officer Quest shuts his eyes
Officer Quest: ...
Don't enter that shed again.
Forget any of this happened.
We will leave you alone and assure your safety.
Forrest: Of course, sir, of course. I'm sorry I couldn't be of any more help to
you.
Officer Quest: You can go.
Forrest: I'd be happy to answer any more questions if you have any later. Hopefu
lly somewhere where I don't feel like I'm about to be murdered.
Shady Man: If you mention this to anyone.
They won't believe you.
And if they do,
Forrest: Don't worry, I won't.
Shady Man: we'll make sure that is resolved.
Forrest: It's too hard to believe, anyway.
...
Forrest takes one last look back at Roger
Roger Perkins nods to him
Roger Perkins: Stay safe.
Forrest: .........
......Right, yeah.
Forrest looks back and leaves, heading to get that DRINKAWADDAH

Narrator : did steph have a stroke
she did not reply to gab
Space: steph spoke to gabby
you racist
Mobile L: Forrest is amazing
Shady Man: ...
Steph: Okay, so we need to find out what this suggests.
Narrator : oh it ws hidden
Space: you fucking racist
Narrator : how
Space: 'oh it was hidden'
racist
Mobile L: http://vocaroo.com/i/s1DckYlRc8dz
Space: forrest irl
Forrest oh look girls the fat boy
Space: the fat boy in the woman's restroom...
Mobile L: Yeh they still in the girl ladies room
Gabby: ...You wanna... Like, you wanna know what I think?
Narrator : oh look the fatboy walking by the door
Forrest yeah. IJITS
Gabby: ?
Gabby peeeeps out and
Forrest: ....
Forrest looks back
Forrest: ..Oh, there you are.
Gabby: ...Forrest! Oh, thank frick.
Forrest: So what'd you need to talk to me about.
Gabby: They, uh... They didn't hurt you, did they?
Forrest: Oh, no. They were very cordial.
Steph: ...!
Forrest: What'd the cop do to you again, Steph?
Gabby: ...Okay... Alright, that's... That's good, at least...
Steph: What'd he what?
Forrest: The cop. The one you don't like.
Steph: I don't know what he was trying to do, I got out of there. I think he was
going to shoot me.
Forrest: ....So he hasn't actually done anything to you.
Gabby: ...He tried to kill us once, actually. With his frickin' spirit sword or
whatever.
Steph nods
Forrest: Oh, well in that case.
Gabby: ...But, uh... Y-yeah, the thing...
Forrest: Yeah, the thing.
Gabby: ...The black mass, from the pig... It has something to do with the Nihili
sts.
Steph: . . .
Gabby oooop, uhhh... som1inthere...?
Forrest: You think, so?
Gabby nod nod nod with utmost conviction
Narrator exits her stall
Narrator : f4we
Maria MacArthur: at this point
Forrest: dont mind us mister narrator

Maria MacArthur: i'm going to kill myself
Maria MacArthur leaves her stall
Steph: . . . . . . . .
Maria MacArthur quickly washes her hands
Gabby:
Forrest: Right, so.....
Steph: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
Maria MacArthur: ... I heard everything.
Steph: ... Oh.
Gabby ffffRIIIIIIIICK
Forrest: You talking to somebody in there, Steph.
Steph: Erm.
Maria MacArthur: I didn't know you liked RPGs.
Steph: ...Oh, yeah! Yeah, we-- we're all big RPG fans, actually. Huge fans.
Gabby: ...U-uh... Oh, geez... Pleaseplease don't tell anyone, okay...?
Forrest: That sounds like the chick who punched me.
Maria MacArthur: Nothing to be ashamed of.
Steph: Yeah, it's pretty nerdy, so it's something we keep on the down-low.
Gabby: It's I don't want anyone to get wind of thi
Maria MacArthur pops her head out
Forrest: Oh, it is.
Gabby: ...Eh? You punched him?
Maria MacArthur: Stop talking to girls in the bathroom, molester.
Steph: Yeah, geez, Forrest. How gross.
Forrest: What're you gonna do, punch me again.
Gabby: Please don't...
Maria MacArthur raises a clenched fist
Steph: You totally should hit him.
Maria MacArthur: Walk away.
Gabby: ...God, fricking Steph.
Steph grins
Gabby: What the frick is wrong with you???
Forrest: I know my rights.
Steph: It's Forrest, he can take it.
Gabby: No!!!
Gabby fluster levels rising
Forrest: You gonna set a bad example for the children.
Maria MacArthur: rolling 3d20 + 2
(
15
+
14
+
13
)+2
= 44
Steph: Eeeehehehehe!
Maria MacArthur punches him right in the gut
Steph: ...!
Forrest HOOF
Gabby: HEYYY WHAT THE FRICK!
Gabby ANGER
Forrest doubles over, clutching his fat
Steph: ...Uh, shit. Hardcore.
Forrest: ghh......ghhhhh....
Maria MacArthur: You have no rights, 24601.
Gabby: Motherfricker you try that crap again in my fricking presence, I cannot b
elieve you you're a fricking animal holy frick!
Forrest: .....Did you just fucking quoteGabby STEAAAAM
Steph: Heyyyyyy we should get back to class soon!
Gabby: I WILL END YOU YOU FRICKED UP OLD KID
Maria MacArthur looks at Gabby
Gabby: YOU LAY A FINGER ON ANYONE ELSE AND I WILL FRICKIN' END YOU, JUST WATCH M
E
Steph: . . .
Gabby like a little yappy chihuahua. Awww
Forrest paaaaiiiin
Maria MacArthur you can practically hear the terminator threat-analysis
Steph: ...Uh...
Steph pokes her head out the bathroom door
Maria MacArthur raises a hand
Steph: Sorry! I didn't think she'd actually do it!
Maria MacArthur softly pats her on the head
Forrest: ...fuck you....
Maria MacArthur rolls out
Gabby: DON'T YOU START
Space: i think maria is one of my favorite npcs
Gabby: AAAAAAA! AAAAAAA! WHAT HAPPENED... TO HUMAN DECENCY
Steph: ...Let's get back, huh?
Gabby NUCLEAR
Forrest leans against a wall to catch his breath
Gabby: HHRRRRGGH... HRRRRRGHHH...!
Forrest specifically this wall

Gabby: ...Friiiick, you okay, Forrest? Diddid she get your spleen?
Steph god they are both going to have heart attacks and die aren't they
Gabby YES
Forrest: ....it's fine.....i'll be fine.
Steph: ...
Officer Quest: We heard screaming.
Forrest looks up at dem boys

Gabby: ...Ahhhhh frick, every single bad thing just has to h
Gabby stopped mid shoulder-pat

Forrest: ......Just an argument....Officer...nothing to worry about........
Officer Quest: ...
Steph: ...
Gabby:
Officer Quest: Assault is a serious offence.
Talk to someone.
Forrest: Will do....
Steph: .......
Steph WHEW
Gabby:
Forrest: ......
Gabby PAT PAT PAT PAT
Forrest: ....That man with him.
Gabby: ...The shades on?
*one
Forrest: The fat one.
Steph: What about him?
Forrest: He's like me.
Steph: He's... like you?
Steph doesn't want to make the obvious comparison
Gabby: ...Like... his Archetype...?
Forrest: Hah hah, yes, we're both fat. Not in that way.
Gabby still pat
Forrest: Yeah.
Steph: ...Oh, shit.
Forrest: .......
......Something about him....
.....He seems like he was genuinely trying to help me.
Steph: He seems like the nicest one.
Gabby: ...He, uh... Yeah. He's probably the most decent of the three, morally...
I mean, he seems to regret crap.
Steph: He was like that to me too.
Gabby: The other two. Fricking psychopaths.
Textbook.
Forrest: ...
Gabby: He fell in with a bad crowd.
Forrest: .....Have you two been interrogated by them before.
Steph: Well... I mean, they chased me down when the school went all weird the fi
rst time.
I guess it was an interrogation?
Forrest: Was that when they tried to kill you.
Steph: No that was later.
Gabby: ...If you mean with the spirit sword, this was way after that. I think St
eph got grabbed by them before we even knew about the Third Heaven.
Forrest: Were they all together then.
Gabby: Isn't that right?
Steph: Right.
With the sword... it was just him? I think?
...I wasn't actually there that time, it was Jaime and Gabby and.. Ken was thre
too, right?
Gabby: I think so... And then they're fricking hand-in-the-pie buddy Ruddman had
them with him, right? And he literally, like, threatened to kill us all.
With the limo. Remember?
Steph: Yeah.
And there was the fourth guy. With the gun.
Forrest: ......I see.
Steph: Don't trust anything they say about... anything. They literally had a guy
with a gun try to kill us.
Forrest: Right, right.
Gabby: They're frickers. Fat dude may be okayish... But his friends? Frickers.
Forrest: Got it.
Mobile L: (i got ten more minnits)
Mac D.: you guys wanna call it here?
Mobile L: Only if y'all do?
Space: this seems like a good spot for it
Mac D.: ya
Mobile L: A'ight
That was sick
Officer Quest: any thoughts
Space: maria continues to be the best
Mac D.: The Snake Cult continues to be weird and mysterious
Space: that pig thing was creepy, i kind of figured that's where it was gonna go
but i still dont know the significance
Mac D.: forrest still needs to learn about how steph left a small child to die
Mobile L: I am already forming theories
Space: whats theory
Mobile L: I think Lachance and Lao have the Nihilist goo in them
Space: its like mad cow disease
Officer Quest: nietszche jizz
Space: they ate nihilistburgers
Forrest: we need to stab them and scoop the iblis jizz out
Gabby: surgery
Space: aw shit maybe they're becoming nihilists? since they are pmuch nihilists
in a literal sense
Officer Quest: iblis isn't a nihilist
Mobile L: They are becoming nihilists
Forrest: not if i can help me
Steph: you can do it forrest
Forrest slams a truck full of Hopes And Dreams into history class
Steph: maybe they won't punch you in the gut
Gabby: i believe in u forrest-kun
Mr. Mu: space wants maria to be his waifu
Gabby: space is fricked up and needs enlightenment
cease your desires, space
Steph: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R8OOWcsFj0U
Gabby: ohhhhm
Gabby assumes the lotus position
Steph: fucking buddhists
go back to china
Gabby: quit appropriating my culture you craplord
Steph rubs the buddha statue for good luck
Steph staring gabby directly in the eyes
Gabby:
...fricker
Steph: . . .
Gabby: frickerrrrrr...
Steph: . . .
Gabby: ffffffffff
rrrrrrrrrr
iiiiiiiiii
ccccccc
kkkkkkk
eeeeeeee
Gabby: rrrrrrrr
Steph: . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . .
. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . .. . . . . .. . . .. . . . . . . .
. . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . .. . . ...... .. . .. . . ... . .
Gabby: Fricker.
Steph: ...
Gabby ascends to Nirvana
Mr. Mu: Hopes and dreams, eh...
Steph: mr. mu provides the soundtrack
Mr. Mu: i'm totally going to get to use this before you if it comes down to it
Mobile L: For some reason, I like this song, but I wish the whole thing were lik
e the orchestral intro
Space: oh trust me the way things are going you definitely are gonna
Mr. Mu: yes
Space: @mobile: same
Mobile L: That intro just gives me chills
Mr. Mu: i tried to find an extended version
that is
just the intro
no luck
Mobile L: Damn
I like the increasing contrast of the dynamic between Gab and Steph and Gab and
Forrest
Steph: hit him
Gabby: never
Steph: hit on him
Gabby: ew no he's like my surrogate brother or something
Steph: one or the other
gotta choose
Gabby: ...i choose...
FREE WILL
Gabby very loud Rush playing
Steph: i'll give you a pass since rush is canadain
Mr. Mu: that's an abstract concept, deer
*dear
Space: https://66.media.tumblr.com/8851184fecbdef543832e81a26d75ba6/tumblr_n93np
rVsBe1tqqwoqo1_1280.jpg
Gabby: frick what the haters said
Space: this is too 'monstercat remix-y'
Mr. Mu: i'm the guy who gave you your powers
i know it is
i'm just uploading shit and removing it
Gabby: you gotta experiment with the playlist
Mr. Mu: you have something against monstercat
Space: FUCK you
Mr. Mu: that's not a justification
i can swear too
Space: it's my causus belli
Mobile L: Alas, I must sleep
Space: nite mob
Mobile L: G'naucht
Space: what the hell is a third heaven
Mac D.: where is the mobu

eldritch s. (GM): she said "give me a sec"
Mac D.: hok
Mobile L: I am come
I had to relocate
Gabby: LET'S (NOT) MEET MY DADDY
eldritch s. (GM): Daddy
Space: Daddy
Narrator : Last period, you can almost smell freedom.
Forrest SNIFF SNIFF MOTHERFUCKER
Forrest: ....
Gabby fricking end me
Steph hopes
Narrator : maybe you should go back to class
Forrest: nah
cmon guys let's go home
Gabby MAKE IT DRAGGGGGG
Gabby NEVER END THE SCHOOLING
Gabby heds 2 (which class is last)
Forrest class
Steph returns there, hoping their conspicuous absence wasn't noticed
Gabby OH WAIT yeah biology's still going, DUH
Gabby ...hallo...?
Space: seer might be entertaining guests again or some such
Mobile L: I can wait
Mr. Schmidt: Oh, but look at this...
Roland Glass: Why? What's it up to...
Steph breathes a sigh of relief
Roland Glass is distracted, along with Schmidt
Mobile L: I accidentally the tab
Forrest sits quietly at his desk
Forrest: ..
Gabby:
Narrator : The bell eventually go, and the two grown men stand, talking to each
other about the loathsome sludge.
the day is ended
Gabby ahhhh FRICK
Narrator : you is free
Steph: Finally...
Steph gathers up her stuff
Gabby the misery... has just begun
Gabby reluctantly packs up, looking very unenthused
Martin Witherburg: Soldiers!
Come on, my boys and girls!

Forrest: ....
Gabby: ?
Forrest THE TYRANT
Gabby s-... salvation...?
Steph ah yes, it's time... for Basquetbol
Gabby OHHHH THANK FRICK, AHAHAHAHA
Gabby YEAH EAT THIS, DAD
Martin Witherburg: Come on!
Gabby CAN'T RUIN MY LIFE WHEN I'M B-BALLIN'
Gabby the follow
Steph is deeply ready for this
Gabby walks with a sudden spring in her step
Forrest stays in his desk
Forrest: .....
Forrest gets up to go check and see if the principal is in any condition to spea
k
Gabby space_jam.wav
Martin Witherburg: damn who was on that list
Mobile L: Czech the archive
Mr. Hawthorne is carrying a mound of packed up shit
Mr. Hawthorne: who would like to czech it for me
Forrest: ...Sir.
Mobile L: I shall
Mr. Hawthorne: What is it, my boy.
Forrest: Could I make a request of you.
Mr. Hawthorne: It depends, my boy.
Mobile L: Steph, Vlad, Nathan, Lilly, Gabby, Forrest
Forrest: I was wondering if I could be exempt from the basketball draft.
Mobile L: Also Jaime, but lol legbroke
Mr. Hawthorne: No.
Gabby YEA BASKETBALL IS MY FAVORITE SPORT, I LIKE THE WAY THEY DRIBBLE UP AND DO
WN THE COURT
Mr. Hawthorne turns and walks away
Forrest: ......Sir, why.
Mr. Hawthorne doesn't respond
Forrest: Sir.
Mr. Hawthrone.
Mr. Hawthorne stop
Steph: Were you ever in a sport before, Gabby?
Forrest: *thorne
Mr. Hawthorne: ... why was I so disturbed again...
It was...
... a suggestion...
... Rosem- no, mustard...
Forrest: Basketball.
Gabby: ...Uh... No. I
Forrest: Basketbaaaall.
Mr. Hawthorne: mustard... AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Gabby: *I tried teeball once, but I was, like... three?
Forrest: ......
Mr. Hawthorne begins sprinting,drops all of his shit
Gabby is skinny as frick and has no muscles
Forrest watches him run
Steph: Hehe.
Forrest: .............
Steph: Basketball's fun. You'll like it.
Forrest forrestface.mov
Gabby: ...Don't you gotta be tall to play it correctly?
Forrest: .....
Forrest looks down at the materials he dropped
Narrator : Shit school supplies
Gabby ahahaha, MIDGET GIRL
Gabby MALNOURISHED TINY ASIAN CHILD
Forrest: .........
Gabby small
Steph: Well... it definitely helps, sure.
Forrest stands there, trying to think of who could possibly be the immediate sec
ond in this school's hierarchy
Gabby: ...There's not a goalie, is there? I'm not tall enough for that.
Steph: No, that's soccer.
Narrator : Probably Dr. Hall, then Mrs. Plumber, then Withers, then Mr, Pink, th
en Lachance, then Ms. Lao, then Guildenstern, then Rosencrantz, then Foxhole.
Forrest: ..........
Forrest haaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALL
Forrest: ..........
Gabby: ...Oh. Well, like... have you ever played it?
Forrest: ..........
Forrest decides that Choices must be made, and lines must be crossed
Steph: Not like, on a team.
Forrest searches for.....THE DARK MISTRESS.....
Martin Witherburg puffs
Martin Witherburg: We're short a member.
roll a d20
(
13
)
= 13
Steph: ...?
Gabby:
Gabby ahhh FRICK, forrest no, you'll die of a heart attack in your 20s...
Gabby UNLIKE DAD
Mac D.: Dark Mistress has a theme, right
Steph: ...
Steph tries to look innocent, like she doesn't know who this 'mysterious vanishi
ng fellow' could be
The Dark Mistress is carting around her little suitcase/backpack thing
Mac D.: oh wow how coincidental i was thinking of that exact song
https://soundcloud.com/crazymozog668/lord-laharls-hymn
The Dark Mistress: ;)
Mac D.: just the original one
Forrest: You.
The Dark Mistress stops
The Dark Mistress: O-oh.
It's... you.
Gabby is unsure whether she should or shouldn't speak up at this point
The Dark Mistress: We're not meeting today, you do understand?
Martin Witherburg: Any of you lot know what became of him?
Forrest: Yeah, about that.
Martin Witherburg: Wouldn't do to be a player short.
Forrest: We need to talk
.
Gabby:
The Dark Mistress: ... You should have put this through my Listener.
Gabby shruggity shrug shrug (forrest c'mon, GET HEALTHY)
Steph shrugs simultaneously with Gabby
Forrest: If I wanted to get punched in the face again, I'd have gone back to Jer
sey.
The Dark Mistress: ... What is it.
Forrest: Right now I'm stuck between being held hostage by the basketball team a
nd being held hostage by you.
Martin Witherburg puffs again
Martin Witherburg: We'll wait.
Gabby:
Gabby finds this delay welcome and contents herself to silent thought
Forrest: Frankly if I'm going to have my liberties taken away I would rather hav
e it taken by lazy nerds than have it taken by militant madmen.
So I want to come to an agreement.
The Dark Mistress: We're not meeting today.
Gabby hopes HE hasn't come over and ruined everything for Grandma and Grandpa ye
t
The Dark Mistress: Minerva has a doctor's appointment.
Gabby pls be tough, grandma and grandpa...
Steph quietly curses Forrest
Forrest: I'll make this quick, don't worry.
Gabby seems very at ease now

Forrest: Listen, if you cover me when I say I can't do basketball due to club ob
ligations, I will become the most proactive member of your club you've ever seen
.
The Dark Mistress: ... I'll need to see you in action before I make a choice.
You'll wait until next time, do your best, and then I will decide your... FATE!
Forrest: You don't understand....There is basketball practice today.
Your fate.
Forrest: My alternative is an hour with Hall
Steph is
The Dark
Forrest:
or god's
The Dark
at least glad that she isn't worried as fuck

Mistress: I shall not play to your schedule, fleshling!
Just give me a stupid mundane task to do and tell the coach I'm busy, f
sake.
Mistress: No!
Gabby ohhhhhhm
Forrest: Listen, I have never begged for anything before, but this is the closes
t I have ever gotten.
Look at me.
The Dark Mistress: I summon thee... Ghostly Apparition... Warlock- Papa Doc Duva
lier!
Forrest: Do I look like a basket ball player.
The Dark Mistress throws a pellet at the floor
Forrest: And- I'm sorry, whaThe Dark Mistress 's pellet erupts into black smoke
The Dark Mistress quickly runs away
Forrest: .............
The Dark Mistress trips
Forrest: ........
The Dark Mistress faceplants
Forrest: .........
Forrest walks over
Space: i respect and pity the dark mistress
Forrest: ......You okay.
Martin Witherburg puffs
Steph: .......
Steph checks the time
Gabby ohhhhhhhm...
Martin Witherburg:
Gabby: -uMartin Witherburg:
The Dark Mistress:
Forrest: ......
The Dark Mistress:
Don't check the time, my dear.

A watched pot never boils.
...
... I need some paper towels.
The Dark Mistress has a bleeding nose

Forrest: ...You got it.
Steph: Yeah, yeah...

...Maybe he already left?
Martin Witherburg finishe his cigar
Forrest heads off to the bathroom to RETRIEVE THE PAPER TOWELS with the most ent
husiasm he's ever visibly shown, which is half-assed.
Martin Witherburg: He will pay for this.
Forrest returns with them towels
The Dark Mistress wipes up her face
The Dark Mistress: ... Tell him you need to help set up the AV stuff in the libr
ary.
It's in the broomcloset.
The Dark Mistress stands up
Forrest nods
Steph: Maybe he, uh... forgot?
Forrest: You're a good person.
The Dark Mistress: Please don't talk to me.
Gabby:
Gabby AHAHAHA YESS MAKE IT DRAG
Forrest makes his way to the gymnasium filled with VIGILANCE AND RIGHTEOUS INDIG
NATION
Martin Witherburg: they're in the cafeteria
Forrest yeah there
Martin Witherburg looks down at him
Steph: ...!
Forrest: walks RIGHT UP to that fat fuck churchill
I apologize, Mister Witherburg.
But I'm afraid I can't make it to basketball practice today due to club obligati
ons.
Gabby:
Martin Witherburg: That's no problem.
Gabby ahahahaha, DRAG IT DRAG IT DRAG IT
Martin Witherburg: I wish you luck with your club, boy.
Forrest: Thank you.
Forrest walks out of that cafe like a CHAMP
Martin Witherburg lights another cigar
Steph: ...??????
Forrest time to go set up some MOTHER FUCKIN AV EQUIPMENT
Martin Witherburg: Alright, first things first.
You are my soldiers.
We will be facing foes from all sides.
Forrest heads for that god damn broom closet
Gabby ...forrest... you're gonna die in your 20s... :,(
Gabby clearly... clearly this means she must... DECEIVE him into getting his exe
rcise...!
Steph listens intently to the Prime Minister
Gabby yes... gonna learn all the sick warmups and, uhh... jumps and runs here, t
hen COVERTLY teach them to Forrest... it's FOOLPROOF...
Martin Witherburg begins giving a speech
Martin Witherburg: rolling 1d20
(
2
)
= 2
rolling 1d20
(
11
)
= 11
Mac D.: "mister witherburg what does any of this have to do with basketball"
Martin Witherburg is a classy speaer
Narrator : Forrest opens the closet.
It is a catastrophe.
Forrest: ...........
Gabby is ROUSED FROM WITHIN
Steph feels a quiet, patriotic pride well up within her heart
Gabby FRICK YEAH, BASKETBALL, FRIIIIICK YEAH
Martin Witherburg: We will be attacked from all sides, by Sanford, by other scho
ols from within our own city.
Forrest braces himself to weathers this suffering.
Mac D.: "mister witherburg i thought the team only comes at us from one side"
Martin Witherburg: By the French, and Ukranian, and Japanese, and Italian, and G
erman.
Gabby we'll FRICK 'EM SIDEWAYS
Mac D.: "by those dirty yanks"
"yanks are no good, gabby"
"kill the yanks"
Steph fucking foreign devils
(
4
)
= 4
Gabby: (vietnamese war cry)
Narrator : Forrest finds a bunch of rats.
Forrest: ................
Martin Witherburg: So stand with me, and fight, fight with all you've got, becau
se you are all we've got.
Forrest quietly makes a mental note to mention this to a teacher in fact no let'
s tell someone about this right now
Mobile L: Gabby destroying the Yanks http://vignette2.wikia.nocookie.net/villain
s/images/4/49/FMJSniper.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20120530201641
Forrest is OUTTA THERE and enters the library

Martin Witherburg: And we'll damn-well show them what for.
Gabby: Frick yeah.
Narrator : All the teacher have a hive in here.
Mobile L: Holy shit the sniper literally has Gabby's exact pigtails http://www.t
he-solute.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/03/Sniper-2-e1433460725303-640x360.jpg
Space: it really is her
Forrest MISSSSTER PIIIINK
Forrest: Mister Pink.
Steph: Woo.
Mobile L: http://s8.postimg.org/j12vzhlz9/philip_castle_alternative_poster_desin
g_for_full.jpg
Martin Witherburg: Now, we'll spend this drawing up our campaign.
Gabby YEAHHHH DRAWING
Mac D.: "mister witherburg what does any of this have to do with basket- gets a
cigar in the eye-"
Martin Witherburg has Mrs. Plumber pull out a whiteboard
Martin Witherburg begins drawing elaborate battle plans
Gabby now thinks that this is how basketball works
Mr. Pink: Yeah??
Mac D.: the impressionable gabby being taught to destroy England's enemies
Steph is very sure this isn't how basketball works
Forrest: I just found rats in the broom closet.
Steph: (You getting all of this, Gabby?)
Martin Witherburg: We have scant little time remaining.
We have to practice, and prepare.
Our first foe comes tomorrow.
Steph: ...!
Gabby: (Yeah! Yeah, wow, basketball is frickin' intense.)
Martin Witherburg: And that foe...
Is imprudence!
Aha!
Mac D.: "is forrest freeman"
Gabby I WILL CRUSH IMPRUDENCE, WHERE THE FRICK IS SHE
Space: public enemy no 1
Mac D.: "pelt him with b-balls, kids"
Martin Witherburg: Our first true competitor, however, will come next week.
Gabby just looks exactly how she does in the image
Martin Witherburg: Jacques De Toulouse.
Steph: ...
Steph quietly relieved that they are not havin a fuckin game literally tomorrow
Gabby: ........!!!
Gabby FRANCE... VIETNAM'S OWN FRICKER...
Mr. Pink: Oh.
Gabby revenge... revenge is NIGH
Mr. Pink: Someone should clean those up.
Mac D.: kill them, gabby
kill them all
Forrest: ......
Martin Witherburg: He's a Frenchman, and a veteran coach.

Gabby paint_it_black.wav
Martin Witherburg: We're going to be prepared for him.
Forrest: .....Who's job is it to call for an exterminator.
*wose
*whose
Gabby SHARP NOD
Mr. Pink: Pffft, we'll do it ourselves!
Gabby STEELY GLARE
Forrest: .......
....Is- Is that wise.
Mr. Pink: Come on, I'll show you our extermination gear!
Sure is!
Forrest: ..........
Martin Witherburg: And now...
I tell you.
Read.
Read on the great conflicts of our time.
The Rumble in the Jungle.
The Great War.
Martin Witherburg: Read of the great athletes!
Michael Jordan!
Dennis Rodman!
Gabby YEAHHH KOBE BARKLEY
Martin Witherburg: Kobe!
Gabby DIRK "magical" JOHNSON
Mac D.: "but not lebron"
Gabby THE BIG MAN
Martin Witherburg: Spartacus!
Steph what about shaq...
Gabby THE BIGGGGG MAN
Martin Witherburg: Shaq!
Gabby THE SUPER GLOBETROTTERS
Gabby STEPHEN HAWKING
Martin Witherburg: Study their tectics!
Forrest: ....
Mr. Pink pulls a switch
Mr. Pink unveils the secret exterminator outfits hidden in a cabinet
Gabby ah... yes... The Art of War
Forrest: ............
Steph ah there we go
Mr. Pink begins putting one on overy his suit
Mr. Pink: Come on, we have all szies.
Forrest: ........
Forrest quietly weighs if this is better than basketball

Mobile L: Poor Forrest
Forrest: .......
Forrest yup
Forrest puts on a suit
Martin Witherburg: You represent the pride of our school.
So go, with honor.
Gabby PRIDE YEAHHHH FRICK EVERYONE ELSE
Martin Witherburg: With - wait.
I forgot something.
Forrest: ....I honestly did not suspect that there was a hidden armory in this s
chool.
Gabby: ?
Martin Witherburg: Wait here, you lot.
Gabby :o
Gabby: (...Steph does the library have the one book by Sun Tzu?)
Mac D.: i just love the idea
Steph: ...(Uh... the Art of War?)
Mac D.: of gabby and steph adopting martin's way of thinking and treating the ba
sketball games like they're legitimate wars
Gabby: (Yeah, that one! I think it'll help.)
Steph storms normandy with a b-ball
Mobile L: Oh same
Steph: (They might...?)
Mac D.: "WHY DON'T YOU SERVE YOUR COUNTRY, FORREST, YOU DRAFT DODGER"
Steph: (It's a pretty popular book.)
Gabby: (...We're gonna tear that Frenchie guy a new butthole, y'know. Nyeheheheh
...)
Steph: (Oh yeah, no doubt about that.)
Gabby: (He's gonna, like, frickin'... surrender. Real hard.)
(...I think. I think this'll help with our... other crap, too. We'll learn how t
o be all fast and strong and and slick and crap.)
Mr. Pink grabs his animal control-claw-thing
Mr. Pink: Alright...
We're ready
Forrest cocks his like a shotgun
Steph: (It's too bad Forrest's laziness sort of outweighed all of that completel
y.)
Forrest: Let's roll.
Mr. Pink: They're in here, right?
Gabby: (...Oh, don't worry. I'm gonna help Forrest get frickin' super healthy wi
th the basketball techniques.)
Forrest: The broom closet, yeah.
Mr. Pink: On the count of three.
One.
Gabby: (He won't suspect a thing, and then... then he'll be all muscly and cool.
)
Mr. Pink: Two.
Three!
Forrest: ...
Mr. Pink runs in
Forrest quickly follows

Steph: (Oh my god, haha!)
Mr. Pink: ...
Where are they?
Steph: (That'd be fucking great.)
Forrest: ......
Forrest is this the broom closet
Gabby: (Oh, it will, nyeheheheh! And then we'll all be fricking really healthy,
as a team, an)
Gabby stops to consider something

Gabby: (...D'you think, uh... Ken will watch the basketball games?)
Mr. Pink: yes
Gabby: i didn't ask YOU
Steph: (Oh yeah, no doubt!)
Forrest: .....They're in here somewhere
Gabby: (...Good... I'd... I'd want him to play, too, but...)
Forrest tries to slowly retrace his steps
Mr. Pink follows him
Mr. Pink: rolling 1d20
(
8
)
= 8
Steph: (I'm sure he'd like to watch all the same.)
Forrest: ....I saw them when I was looking for the AV Equipment.
Mr. Pink crashes into some boxes and fucks him up
Mr. Pink: Gah!
Forrest: And- oof
......I lost my place.
Mr. Pink: ... Let's try again.
rolling 1d20
(
9
)
= 9
Forrest: ....Right.
Mr. Pink crashes into the same boxes
Forrest: ......
Gabby: (...Yeah. And it'll... Yeah.)
Forrest: ...Maybe don't retrace that part.
Gabby ...ken's gonna die in his 20s too... :c
Mr. Pink: Got it.
rolling 1d20
(
1
)
= 1
Space: fucking astounding
Mobile L: Oh my God Mr. Pink
Mr. Pink carefully avoids those boxes and then runs straight into a wall
Forrest: ......
Mr. Pink is out cold

Steph smiles reassuringly at her
Forrest: .....
Forrest shit.....this is gonna be a solo op....
Mr. Pink 's head lands in a pile of rat shit
Forrest: ...!
Forrest RAT SIGN
Forrest approaches
(
16
)
= 16
Yes...
A rat trail...
Forrest carefully follows the trail
Narrator : It leads to a big hole in the drywall
Gabby but... but this is what people like her are for. To make that stop. And...
It'll stop. He'll be fine.
Gabby He will...
Forrest: .........
Gabby now looks wistfully contemplative
Forrest wonders if this school even employs a janitor
Forrest looks around for a flashlight or some alternative
Narrator : His suit includes one.
Steph: (Y'know, uh... our school has a pretty good sports program.)
Forrest ah HAH. bless modern technology
Forrest shines it into the hole
Narrator : Paydirt.
The rat nest.
Forrest Gotcha......
Forrest what's he rocking on his suit
Narrator : Some cans of pesticide, rattraps, a knife, a flare gun.
Forrest: ....
Forrest questions the knife and flare gun
Space: the rats get big here
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BOv5ZjAOpC8 forrest
Narrator : brb
Gabby: (...Yeah... I didn't even know it existed until, like, today, though.)
(...I don't watch very much sports. Grandpa likes hockey a lot, though.)
(And baseball.)
Forrest wonders if he has some sort of.....Rat And-Or Rat Corpse Containment Dev
ice....
Steph: (Playing sports is better than watching them, anyways.)
Gabby: (...Huh. I mean... It always looked really intense, so I guess it would b
e.)
(Physical activity is good for the brain because it gets more blood into it.)
Steph: (Oh yeah, for sure!)
(And it's fun, y'know.)
Gabby: (...Yeah, I... I guess. I mean... I run around sometimes, outside, until
my frickin' spleen starts hurting and I have to stop. And then I get sweaty, and
I dunno how I feel about that...)
Mobile L: When she says this, she means that she literally runs in circles to ge
t the blood pumping in her brain
Space: oh my god
Mobile L: Sometimes she screams too to get her spirits up
Space: oh my god
Steph: (You've gotta pace yourself.)
Gabby: (...Like, with Gatorade breaks? If I drink too much, my spleen just frick
in' loses its crap completely after I start again.)
Steph: (No, just going a little slower.)
Gabby: (...Jogging, maybe?)
Steph: (Yeah, jogging.)
Gabby: (That... that sounds good, actually.)
(...I need to get some jogging-type clothes, like Grandma and Grandpa have.)
(I don't like getting my uniform sweaty.)
Gabby this school doesn't even have a uniform policy gabby
Steph: (I go jogging too, we could be running buddies.)
Steph quietly wonders where she even got the school uniform from
Gabby PROFESSIONALISM...!
Gabby: (...Ooh! Ooh, sure, let's do that.)
Steph: (Great, sounds like a plan. Uh... how early do you get up usually?)
Gabby: (Six AM on school days, seven on Saturday and Sunday.)
Steph: (Oh, good, that's actually not too bad. You're supposed to get up early w
hen you go jogging.)
(It's just one of those things.)
Gabby: (Hey, getting up early is like, a reality of life. When I get into colleg
e, I'm gonna get up at five every morning.)
Steph: (That's going to destroy you. You're gonna hate life.)
Gabby: (Not if I go to bed at eight every night~)
Steph: (You are going. To hate life.)
Gabby: (Such are the realities of adulthood, Steph...!)
Steph: (Well you could, y'know, alleviate that by going to sleep at normal human
hours!)
Gabby: (Are you frickin' kidding me, eight PM is the optimal bedtime, have you e
ver watched Lazy Town)
Steph: (...oh my god)
Gabby: (It was written by Scandinavian health experts, Steph, Sportacus knows wh
at the frick he's talking about.)
Steph: (gabby you're the best you know that?)
(you know that you're the best)
Gabby: (Wh I am...?)
(...I mean, yeah of frickin' COURSE)
Gabby nyeheheh... steph is weird
Steph: (Hehehe!)
Steph gabby is so weird
Forrest my friends are all so fucking weird

Space: '''''friends'''''
Forrest """"""""""friends""""""""""
Gabby ...friends... c:
Steph: (So, hey, Gabby. Do you know much about writing a book?)
Gabby: (...Uhhh... Nope.)
Steph: (Oh.)
(Well, do you want to bounce off ideas anyways?)
Gabby: (...Sure, I guess. I mean...)
(...If I was gonna write a book, I think it'd be about physics... Or, um... a bi
ography of Chopin, but both of those are already things, so...)
Steph: (Well, like... I'm having a little bit of writer's block. What with... y'
know. Everything going on.)
Gabby: (...Oh... Yeah, that... That'll do it. Did you have any ideas before then
?)
Steph: (Well... a little, but not anything... substantial, you know?)
(It has to be really good. Gotta hit a home-run first try.)
Gabby: (Right, well... Hmm...)
(...Maybe, like... a biography of Chopin, except it's historical fiction, and yo
u could make a little crap up about his life events.)
Steph: (What did he do?)
Forrest: "well see on his deathbed he had a fever dream where he went on a JRPG
adventure"
Gabby: (...Ohhh, Steph, he... He was probably the best classical composer ever,
and he helped the Polish people take pride in their nation even as some crap was
going down...)
(...But... He was always really sick... and he died before he could get married
to a pretty lady...)
Space: was thatg ame any good
*game
Gabby is talking about him with the same kinda dreamy tone she uses when speakin
g of Ken... HMMMMM!
Mobile L: IDK, I just remember seeing footage of it back in 2005 or some shit
Steph: . . .
(Maybe that one's got potential...)
Mac D.: i played a demo of it and remember really liking the demo
Gabby: (...You think? I mean, most of the stuff out there is just about his musi
c, see, and a lotta his life is kinda mysterious.)
(They don't even really know what illness he had. There's ideas that it could ha
ve been TB or cystic fibrosis, but frickin' Poland won't let anyone do genetic t
esting on his remains...)
Steph: (Well...)
...
Steph don't crush the child's dreams
Steph: (...I think there could be some stuff there, sure.)
Gabby: (...Ohhh man, if you frickin' wrote a good fictional account of Chopin's
life...)
Gabby gets all starry-eyed
Gabby: (I would read it so hard.)
Steph: (Hehehe... yeah.)
Steph whatever she does will crush this child's dream
Steph there is no question now
Gabby make this little girl's hazubando fantasies come true

Mac D.: random question but does a game of thrones episode play today
Mobile L: No idea
Space: next ep is on sunday
Mobile L: Eldy must be waylaid with something else
Steph: (I, uh... guess I'd have to do some... research?)
Mobile L: (Oh yeah, uh... I have, um... some books about him at home, and like,
a bunch of his compositions on my iPod, and some sheet music.)
Gabby: WHOOPS
Gabby a-and some pictures... all over my wall... a lot of pictures...
Steph: (Oh, uh, yeah, those'd be a lot of help.)
Steph trying not to be weirded out by the Gab...
Gabby is basically a belieber or directioner, except with an infinitely snobbier
fandom
Gabby: (Nyeheheh, great! I'll try to bring a book and maybe some of the music to
morrow, and then you can take it home, and... yeah.)
Steph: (Great, then that's a plan too.)
Mobile L: He looks like fucking Steve Buscemi in this one https://upload.wikimed
ia.org/wikipedia/commons/e/e8/Frederic_Chopin_photo.jpeg
Gabby: (Oh man, thanks Steph, seriously. This I can tell this is gonna be frickin
g greatness.)
Space: ewww
Steph smiles a little
Mobile L: Shit taste in hazubando
Steph: (Yeah! Yeah, no problem.)
Narrator : hello
Space: ayo
Mac D.: it's been 3,000 years....
Narrator : what did forrest do
Mac D.: he checked to see if he had like a rat cage
Narrator : Sure.
Gabby c:
Forrest go time, Freeman.....
Forrest goes to GRAB a rat with his grabbin' stick and stick it in the rat cage
Narrator : roll
Mac D.: 1d20 or 3d20
Narrator : 3d20 retard
(
10
+
18
+
12
)
= 40
Narrator : He snatches a rat and cages it.
Roll again.
(
7
+
4
+
5
)
= 16
Narrator : He misses a rat.
Roll again.
Steph: ...
....
Steph covertly checks her watch again
Narrator : This is patently stupid, this wait.
(
15
+
18
+
4
)
= 37
Narrator : Forrest collects what be believes to be all the rats.
Gabby is in no hurry for school to e OHP he is back now
Forrest YEAH
Martin Witherburg: Here we are!
Martin Witherburg is carrying a case of uniforms
Forrest FUCK YOURSELF, MOTHER NATURE
Martin Witherburg: Our jersies!
Gabby OOOOOOOOOH
Forrest looks back at Mr. Pink and attempts to rouse him
Steph: ...!
Steph hopes they're new and cool and not gross
Mr. Pink: Mgrh....
Forrest: I caught the rats.
Mr. Pink raises his head
Mr. Pink: ... Oh...
Good.
Forrest: ....Where do I take this.
Martin Witherburg: They're new, thankfully.
Martin Witherburg begins handing them out
Steph takes hers
Mr. Pink: Put them in Hawthorne's office.
Gabby please be small enough to not just slide off my scrawny body
Forrest: .....Um.
Is that wise.
Mr. Pink: Yeah.
Forrest: Is he going to come into the office next morning with them there, becau
se I think that may kill him.
Mr. Pink: He's a falconer.
Forrest: ......But....wait....
...He owns a chicken, doesn't he.

Mr. Pink: Yes.
He loves birds/
Forrest: ....Does he also own falcons.
Mr. Pink: Yes!
Forrest: ...Oh.
Well, alright then.
Someone please let him know in advance. I don't want him to die.
Mr. Pink: It'll be fine!
Forrest: ....
Forrest just
Martin Witherburg: Alright, you lot.
Forrest goooooes to put the rats in the office
Martin Witherburg: Off with you.
Narrator : He does so.
Forrest: ......
Narrator : He left the door unlocked.
Forrest: ....................
Space: a shit i forget
did steph tell forrest 'hey check the school records'
Forrest S E A R C H T H E R O O M E X T E N S I V E L Y
Gabby ...ahhhh FRICK... school is now over...
Gabby:
Steph: ...Wait, we're - just getting uniforms today?
Narrator : What is he looking for.
Martin Witherburg: And your assigned reading, the outline of our tactics, and a
good speech!
Steph: Oh. That too, yeah...
...Well, see you!
Steph hurries the FUCK outta there
Gabby:
Gabby despondently trudges to the library to find a copy of The Art of War
Steph: ...?
Hey, Gab, where're you goin'?
Forrest School Records.
Forrest Teacher Info
Forrest anything that Looks Weird
Gabby: ...I'm gonna try to find The Art of War.
Steph: Oh, cool, I'll tag along.
Gabby: ...Okay. Uh, and you can read it too, if you'd like. We can share.
Gabby DREAD. DREEEEEAD
Narrator : the teacher nest festers
alright, roll, forrest
(
13
+
14
+
19
)+1
= 47
Steph: ...Really is a popular hangout, huh?
Narrator : Mr. Pink is getting out of a Ghostbusters-esque jumpsuit.
*set of overalls
Gabby: ...Yeah, no kiddin'... Wonder what he was up to.
Gabby HUNT 4 CHINESE BOOKS
Narrator : He finds staff records.
Steph quietly searches for books on writing style and grammar
Forrest AH HAH
Narrator : roll you two shitheads
Forrest gives em a read
Forrest specifically focusing on the records of Lao, Lachance, and Foxhole
(
7
+
4
+
11
)+1
= 23
{{(
15
+
9
+
8
)}}+0
= 9
Narrator : Neither of them find what the seek.
Alright, well.
Lao is pretty normal.
Steph: ...God damn the Dewey Decimal System.
Narrator : She's described as very positive.
Model teachers.
*teacher
Loose canon.
Lachance is described as aggressive.
A note in the margin says "frightening"
Narrator : Foxhole is described as "very unique"
Gabby: ...Frickin' heck. Why wouldn't they have it?
Narrator : Personal comments include: "toothless", "funny", "short"
Steph: Maybe it's just not a school library thing.
Forrest: .....
Forrest nothing you didn't already know....damn it.....
Narrator : All of the records are signed by Hawthorne.
Forrest decides to read through the records of the other teachers more carefully
for anything of note
Forrest is starting to think Hawthorne isn't all there..........
Narrator : Nope, nope, nope.
Everything seems in order.

Forrest: .......
...Well, principal doesn't seem to be in on anything, from the looks of it.....
Forrest carefully puts the records back, and returns to the broom closet
Forrest gotta get that AV SHIT
Narrator : forrest could look a- never mind then
Forrest oh never mind that
Space: god damn you forrest
Forrest what COULD i look at mister narrator
Gabby: ...Yeah, guess not... Frick. I guess... I guess I should go home now, huh
?
Narrator : well look at your notes
what could be involved in the mystery
Forrest: ..........
Steph: ...Well... yeah, I guess so.
Forrest starts looking for OLD SIXTIES RECORDS
Gabby: ...Maybe he already came and left... We were here for pretty long, right.
..?
Steph: I wouldn't bet on it.
Gabby:
Gabby sighs
Gabby: ...Well, whatever. I'm dreading it, so I may as well just... just get it o
ver with.
Steph: ...Do you, uh, want me to walk home with you?
Gabby: ...If... I mean, if you want. You don't gotta...
Gabby sternly begins making for the door
Steph: Let's roll, boss.
Steph follows her out
Gabby: ...Nyeheh. Vamonos, or... yeah, what they say in Texas...
Gabby UNENTHUSED DEPARTURE
Steph exeunt
Narrator : roll for it
Vlad: Hey.
Stop.
Gabby: ?
Gabby ohhhh FRICK, this guy...
(
19
+
12
+
7
)+1
= 39
Gabby: ...Yeah?
Steph stops
Steph looks back at the Vlad

Vlad: Come here.
Steph: What do you want?
Narrator : Forrest spies the old records.
Gabby suspicious glance
Narrator : Blueprints, and all that, though...
They're all burned and fucked up.
Forrest: ........
Vlad: I don't want to shout, come here
Forrest reads through what he can of them
Gabby:
Gabby cautiously approaches
Gabby: ...Yeah?
Steph: ...
Vlad: I know you're doing stupid shit.
It's probably illegal.
If you need any supplies.
I have people.
I don't like you.
But you can give me money.
Narrator : Hm...
Gabby: ...Are... Are you like... implying that we push drugs...?
We don't.
Steph: ...Well, to be honest, that's pretty fair of -Narrator : There was, in fact, a large extension on the bulding.
It is mysterious.
Vlad: I don't give a shit what you do.
Forrest: .....
Narrator : It merely says "See Document 1.b"
Forrest tries to find any details of what purpose this Mysterious Extension held
Forrest: ....?
Forrest Document 1.b.......1.b.......
Steph: ...Uh, well, if we're ever in the neighborhood for - y'know, something li
ke that, we'll find you. Thanks.
Narrator : There is no document 1.b.
It is conspiciously missing.
Vlad: I mean it.
Knives, guns, drugs, bullets.
Forrest: ......It was either destroyed in the blast, or....
Gabby:
Forrest hurriedly puts the various Old Documents in his backpack
Steph: Yeah, I know you do. We're - we are doing stupid shit, but not stuff that
needs that. Yet. Y'know.
Forrest closes the various drawers and tidies things up before heading out the d
oor
Forrest NOW to get that AV Equipment
Gabby: ...If we need it, though, we'll contact you. Thanks again.
Narrator : He grabs the AV equipment.
Vlad: Hmph.
Gabby shrugs and turns to leave again
Gabby ...maybe if he has horse tranqs... something humane can be done about the
snake frickers
Steph is wondering how much this shit would cost
Steph she's not made of money...
Forrest excellent.....TO THE LIBRARY
Space: they could lit. pay with the stolen money tbh
Gabby: yo ms karloman, when're we gonna cook
Narrator : Forrest sets it up without further incident and heads outside.
Forrest WAIT
Steph: i am the danger
Forrest gotta change outta these buster clothes first.....
Forrest okay now we go
Forrest: So how was basketball.
Steph: We got swank uniforms.
Forrest: That's n.......
Forrest sees The Three Bozos on the other end
Steph takes casual note of the five fuckboys
Steph: ...Oh, shit.
Gabby:
Gabby looks down at her phone to see if Grandma or Grandpa have tried to call or
anything
Narrator : Yes.
Gabby:
Forrest: ....
Gabby CALLING: Grandma
Roland Glass is finishing today's report
Roland Glass: ...
Steph glances at Forrest
Steph: ....
Narrator : The snake fickers are all standing on the beach, staring at the horiz
on
Gabby ew FORGET YOU GUYS, i have plenty of misery elsewhere
Space: the green light
Eunice Trn: Hello...? Is this the police!
Steph: (...They've got the other guy with 'em too.)
Eunice Trn: Where is our beloved grandaughter!?
Forrest: ......
Gabby: ...N Grandma, it's me! I was just kinda late after school because they're
doing basketball now.
Forrest: (They haven't noticed us, it looks like.)
Eunice Trn: Oh.
Gabbriella!
You're safe!
Steph: (Let's get going.)
Gabby: Sorry to worry you... Y-you didn't actually call 'em, did you...?
Steph taps Gab on the shoulder
Gabby: ?
Eunice Trn: No, no, not yet.
Forrest: .....
Harry looks back at them over his shoulder
Forrest tries to see if they're conversing with one another WHEN
Forrest: ......
Harry: Nice sneaking, chief.
Gabby: ...Okay, good. Yeah, um... I'm safe, don't worry. I was just about to com
e home, actually.
Steph: ...
Gabby DON'T MIND ME, INNOCENT GIRL TALKING WITH GRANNY ON PHONE
Harry sits down
Gabby SMALL INNOCENT LITTLE TINY SMALL GIRL
Eunice Trn: Good, your father was terribly worried!
Gabby: ...Oh... He's... here...?
Harry: I'm Harry.
Gabby h-he's WORRIED...?????
Forrest: .....Isn't that nice.
Have a nice day, Harry.
Gabby ...s-stupid dad... 'm fine...
Harry: You too.
Harry flashes him a winning grin
Gabby tralalalala, going in a HOME direction...
Steph stares at Gabby
Steph then at Harry
Steph then back at Gabby
Forrest: ...
Eunice Trn: I would put him on, but there's only so much time on this plan.
I will talk to you later, Gabbreilla!
Gabby is just blankly staring off while she speaks to her grandma
Eunice Trn: Hugs and kisses!
Gabby: ...Okay, you too, Grandma. Nyeheheh. Bye...
Eunice Trn hangs up
Gabby:
Gabby ...dad... WORRIED...
Gabby HMMMM
Gabby:
Shady Man: Leave.

Gabby yyyyyyYEP AHAHAHA, MAYBE LET'S GO HOME
Gabby: Okay, so long!
Forrest: ...What's up, more "official police business."
Steph: ....
Gabby honestly dreads the DAD MEETING a tiny bit less than hanging around these
frickers
Shady Man looks at Harry
Shady Man nods
Gabby:
Harry reaches into his coat
Steph: Look, we really ought to go.
Right now.
Gabby looks back at Steph and Forrest like "...c'mon, guys..."
Gabby veddy worries
Gabby: *worried
Forrest: ....
Gabby https://www.artstation.com/artwork/d0kOw This, minus the tear
Forrest glances at Steph briefly, before turning his eyes back to Harry and slow
ly starting to walk.
Harry nods at them, smiling
Gabby oh thank frick... c:
Gabby VAMONOS
Steph tries to keep a steady composure as she walks, like Forrest, but fails
Steph keeps looking over her shoulder at them
Narrator : They don't pursue.
Gabby isn't even bothering to look back
Gabby just WALKEN
Forrest keeps his eyes on them entirely as he walks
Narrator : They resume staring at the sunset
*horizon
Forrest: ..........We may have just let them get away with something serious.
Gabby:
...My grandma was really worried, though. She was about to call the cops...
Steph: They were waiting for it again. The -- y'know, the Second Heaven.
Gabby: http://i.imgur.com/7JBtSl7.png
Forrest: .....Is it happening again tonight.
Space: it is Them
Gabby: ...No idea. It just... It kinda just happens.
Steph: I mean, evidently they know something we don't.
Gabby is advancing for HOME
Forrest: I might have been able to hear them talk, if our position wasn't given
away.
Gabby:
Forrest: Or maybe they knew it was us the second we stepped out, who the hell kn
ows
.
Gabby: ...I think it was the second thing, yeah... Frickers.
Steph is 100% sure it's because Gabby was talking on her phone
Steph: Okay, so where do we go from here then.
Forrest: Good question.
Steph: ...Okay, you know Vlad?
Gabby: ...Well. I need to make a stop. You guys can, like... devise something, p
robably, I'll catch up.
Forrest: The delinquent, yeah.
...Alright, Gabby. Stay safe.
Steph: Yeah.
Gabby: ...Thanks. You too. Andand call if anything happens, okay? Anything.
Or at least text.
Forrest: I will, don't worry.
Gabby shoots Forrest and Steph a small smile
Gabby: Alright... See you soon, hopefully.
Steph just looks pretty rattled by now
Steph: Yeah.
Gabby TIME TO SWALLOW THE BITTER PILL
Forrest watches her go
Forrest: ........
Can't wait to see what we caused on the evening news tomorrow.
i didn't realize that was a breakthrough line
Steph: Vlad knows we're doing shady shit, and he's gonna sell us shady stuff if
we want.
Douglas was sitting in the living room, waiting
Forrest: What a surprise. The asshole deals in less-than-legal activities.
Gabby ohhhh boy...
Forrest: What was he offering.
Douglas: ... Gabby!
Gabby: ...Heyyyy! Hey there, Dad. Hi.
Gabby forced smile
Douglas: Come here, give me a hug!
Gabby: ...Um, okay...
Steph: Guns, drugs, knives, ammo... I assume more things like that? Y'know, of t
hat ilk?
Forrest: Mm.
Gabby d-dad...? hug...
Douglas hugs her with his meaty arms.
Forrest: Which probably means he gets at least some of his supply from Foxhole
Gabby uhhhh oh man
Steph: That makes sense. Medical supplies and shit.
Forrest: Right, yeh.
Douglas lets go.
Forrest: Now, I don't mean to startle you or anything, but there's somebody stan
ding right behind us.
Jasper Trn: Douggie, tell her the good news.
Gabby ...WHAT ARE YOU PLANNING
Douglas: Well, uh...
Steph: Then fucking... c'mon, we're going to my house.
Douglas scratches the back of his neck
Steph starts for la casa de karloman
Douglas: I think I might me getting a job soon.
Forrest: ........Well, alright.
Forrest follo
Gabby: ...Oh! Oh, wow, uh... That's... That's great, Dad!
What, um... what kinda job?
Gabby ...wow... is he really...
Douglas: Uh, they're hiring in Fort McMurray, over in Alberta.
I might get a job on the Oilpatch.
Mac D.: douglas dies in the forest fire TOPICAL
Narrator : you know i have a half brother who works up there
Mac D.: how's he doin
Gabby: ...Ooh. Oh, yeah, I heard there's, uh... lotsa stuff there, y'know. The e
nergy sector, there's just a whole buttload of opportunities, isn't there?
Narrator : he's not dead
Gabby is genuinely impressed but trying hard to temper it
Mac D.: good i hear the majority of fort mcmurray's citizen are trained in relie
f and first aid
Narrator : but workwise he's even more fucked over now
Mobile L: Aw damn
Space: its really fucked
Narrator : unemployment in alberta was rocketing up anyway due to ~oil prices~
Mobile L: Doug boards a doomed train
Steph enters the living room, just tossing her backpack in the general direction
of the couch
Forrest walks in, taking his shoes off and setting his backpack down like a DECE
NT HUMAN BAYNG
Douglas: Yeah, and it should be good for a while...
Though I'll probably be away for a... very long time.
So I wanted to see you before then.
Mobile L: I am still pleased with how these faceclaims look like they could conc
eivably be related
Douglas: While I still can.
Gabby: ...Oh... Uh...
Steph: Man... okay.
Gabby AAAAAA WHAT IS GOING ON
Douglas: ...
Gabby: ...Well... Well, thanks, I guess...
I mean... It'll... It'll be really good, and I... You'll do great, probably...
Douglas: ... Thanks, Gabby.
Douglas pets one of Eunice's cats
Douglas is scratched by it
Douglas: ...
Gabby ...aaaaaa god dang it... d-don't make me not hate you, dad...
Douglas tries petting it again
Douglas is scratched again
Gabby: ...Lemme, um...
Forrest: I stole school records.
Gabby swiftly goes to grab a band-aid and some Neosporin
Steph: Nice. What'd you find.
Forrest pulls out the BURNED SHIT HE GOT
Forrest: These are blueprints of the place back in the sixties.
Douglas: It's fine, Gabby.
I'll get it worse in the Oil Patch.
Forrest: There was a building extension. But it's detailed on a document I could
n't find in his offfice.
Douglas: I've gotta... rough it out.
Forrest: Which means it's either long since burned-up or was stolen.
Steph peers at them
Gabby:
Gabby https://cdn3.artstation.com/p/assets/images/images/000/627/175/large/yewon
-park-color-script-3.jpg?1443931225
Narrator : i've said what i said on them
Gabby WHAT IS HAPPENIIIIIIIIIIIING
Douglas sits in his chair, hands in his lap
Douglas: ... I'm gonna, uh...
Steph: And this was in Hawthorne's office?
Douglas: Go get something to eat.
Forrest: Yeah.
I don't think he's in on anything. I think he's just a weirdo.
Douglas stands up and puts his dirty coat on
Gabby: ...O-okay... Um... I think... I think we still have some pho in the fridge
, if... if you'd rather not go...
Gabby AAAAAAAAAAAA
Steph: Maybe he's good at hiding it.
Douglas: Nah, it's fine. You should eat more, Gabby.
Forrest: The man almost died hearing a double entendre about mustard.
Douglas: Take my share, alright?
Gabby: ...O-okay...
...Um... Have fun, Dad...
Steph: It's called 'acting.'
Gabby AAAAAA AAAAAA AAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
Douglas quickly fixes his stray bits of hair and heads outside
Forrest: You would know, wouldn't you.
Gabby:
Jasper Trn: He's come a long way, hasn't he.
Jasper Trn is reading the paper
Steph: Hey, fuck off.
Gabby looks at Grandma and Grandpa like she just found out that angels are real
or something and doesn't know what to make of it
Forrest shuffles his blueprints together and slips them back into his bag
Gabby: ...Did, um...
Forrest: You're honestly no better than that con artist.
Gabby: ...Did he just... get like that... on his own, or...
Steph: ...
Jasper Trn: Must've.
Forrest: I would have never gotten my twelve dollars back if you didn't want to
look good in front of a kid.
Jasper Trn: I told you, he takes after me.
I used to be a troublemaker when I was young.
Steph: It wasn't about that.
Gabby:
Gabby tries to fathom this
Eunice Trn: You still are, Jasper!
Forrest: So what was it, then.
Gabby ...wh what people CHANGE???? NO....... geddout...
Jasper Trn: Eh?
Steph: She was having a rough day. I didn't want to make it worse than it alread
y was.
Eunice Trn: I said you still are, Jasper!
Forrest: Right.
Gabby: ...Nyeheh.
Jasper Trn: Eh!? Speak up.
Steph: Look, believe what you want, I really can't be bothered to care.
Gabby aaaaaa... grandma and grandpa...
Eunice Trn just dumps a cat in his lap
Gabby ...i cannot be too sad when i am around you...
Forrest: Fine by me. Did you dig up anything worthwhile during your basketball p
ractice.
Jasper Trn: Ah! Volkswagen, you've my favorite kitty, yes you are...
Jasper Trn scratches the cat's ear
Gabby: ...Nyeheh. Volsky.
Gabby goes to scritch the wee kitty as well
Gabby: ...I guess, um... I guess he'll be living there, huh?
Steph: We got our uniforms.
Jasper Trn: Yes.
Forrest: I'm sure that'll prove invaluable.
....
....How long has it been.
Three, four days?
Jasper Trn: It'll be challenging for him.
Gabby: ...Yeah... I mean... Heckuva commitment for ... yeah...
Steph: Since when?
Gabby: ...Will... Will he be okay? I, um... I'm glad for him and all, but I'm ki
nda... If it falls through...
Forrest: Since our trip. There.
Steph: Yeah. Around thereabouts.
Jasper Trn: We'll be here for him, Gabbriella.
Gabby: ...Yeah...
Forrest: Starting to wonder if it hasn't just stopped.

Gabby still has the lingering fear that things will revert to How They Were
Jasper Trn: Sit on my knee.
Gabby nods slightly and gently hops on up beside Volksy
Jasper Trn hugs her
Gabby:
Steph: The snakefuckers were waiting at the school. I'd think that means it's no
t stopped.
But, y'know. It'd make as much fuckin' sense as anything else for it to just sto
p out of nowhere.
Jasper Trn: And we'll always be here to support you, too, Gabbriella.
Forrest: Or they could be just as confused as we were why it's been so long.
Gabby:
Gabby INTENSE HUGBACK... trying very hard not to lose composure at this most sen
sitive of times
Gabby: ...Thanks... Thanks, you guys...
Gabby AAAAAAAAA I LOVE MY GRANDPARENTS, AAAAAAA DAD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAA AA
AAA AAAAA AAAAA... aaaaa
Steph: Then why'd they tell us to get lost?
Forrest: They don't trust us, maybe?
Jasper Trn: Oh, it's time for Top Gear!
Forrest: Kind of like how we don't trust them.
Gabby: ...Ooh, frick yeah, that's right.
Gabby c,:
Jasper Trn eagerly begins watching Top Gear
Steph: That would imply they see us as some kind of threat or an obstacle. Which
I doubt.
Space: british or american version
Jasper Trn: american
Forrest: See us as enough of one to make us get lost.
Space: that tells me something about him
Steph: They obviously wouldn't have given a shit if it wasn't still going on.
Forrest: And how would they know.
Steph: That surveyor-whatever-the-fuck guy was there, too.
Gabby happily also watches another of Grandpa's dang car shows, just content to
have some quiet time with her family again (and put off deciding how to feel abo
ut Dad for now...)
Forrest: Could have just been absorbed in his work.
Not like there was a gunfight or anything.
Mobile L: It's almost 2 and I think I'd best sleep
Steph: Oh, yeah, sure.
Space: guten nitten mobben
Mac D.: g o
Jasper Trn: goodnight
Mobile L: Y'all can keep going, tho. G'night, that was adorbs
Forrest: If they alread knew everything, I can't see why they bothered to interr
ogate me.
Steph: They obviously know more than we do.
Forrest: You know, I'm thinking about that.
How do you know that.
Steph: They've been at this longer than us?
Forrest: It's possible, but what exactly do we have that implicitly ties them to
groups from the past.

Steph: It's a pretty safe bet that they were an older group like us.
Forrest: Okay, now let's review the evidence that supports that beyond "they're
older than us."
Steph: Mr. Mu said so?
Narrator : wrap it up
Forrest: And you believe his every word?
Steph: What the hell else do we have to go off of? He's probably our best source
of information for now.
Forrest: That's just it. We barely have anything.
And every possible source we've got, we're always running from.
Just how much are we certain of is actually true?
Steph: I really don't know.
Forrest: Neither do I, and that frustrates me.
Steph: Yeah, no kidding.
...Anyways, I've got homework.
Forrest: ...Right. See you tomorrow then, I guess.
Forrest gets up and gets his shoooes on
Steph: Bye, Forrest.
Forrest: Mm. Be safe.
Forrest exit, hastage left
Mac D.: oh i just noticed seer fucked off
Space: i think he did as soon as we ended?
Mac D.: no i think he's been gone for a couple minutes now
anyway PHONE NOW BYE

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Third Heaven Archive 3

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Iblis: What is it...?

I have no business with you.

Mobile L: Gabby doesn't need meds, they disappoint her

Teddy Reinside gently shuts it

How old are you again.

Nathan: It's just a little blood!

Fawkes M.: Probably

Fawkes M.: We're forming a cafeteria line

ere's at least eight of us here?

Gabby FRICKING LET ME ROLL FOR INITIATIVE YOU FRICKS

Narrator : It thrusts its "hips" at him.

Mac D.: odd it says on the sheet for me

Space: look at that fucking roll

Forrest: .....Those small ones are fucking tissue. Go nuts.

Narrator : rolling 2d8

Space: well all the students at least

Forrest is poisoned and can't see

Fawkes M.: Jeezus, Ken

Mr. Mu: you're both wrong you fucking idiots

Ken coughs a bit

Teddy Reinside: Stop it, you kids.

Forrest: Los Illuminatos....Haven't heard of that one.

...Maybe duct tape...

Steph: ...This is crap...

Narrator : fucking prick

Steph moves to shut the computer down

Jaime sighs, folding his arms

Jaime watches Steph go

Be sure to write down the names you know, too.

Mr. Mu: Yes?

for them at all.

Steph: Wow, really?

Mr. Mu: i have no opinion

Mr. Mu: nope

eldritch s. (GM): https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/0d/Franz_Lisz

This isn't Mu's room, is it?

Ken fell onto the bench

Mobile L: Take her to Ted Horton's or wherever the donit place is

Jaime checks his watch

Steph: Um, can I have a water, please?

Richard Moneypenny slams the breaks

Forrest looks down at her

Forrest: When I was little, for sure.

Gabby: ...I think I even... I even thought I was ready to die...

Fawkes M.: Typical salesmen

his knuckles. Just another day on the job.....

Ed Stuart 's neck in particular is badly sunburned and red

Steph: ...Wanna walk me home?

Sherwood Cotter is kissing babies and putting up posters

Fawkes M.: Recap me on this person? I wasn't there for them

Forrest: Sounds like they're home, Sooz.

Steph looks back

Steph can't let go now...

Forrest: See you, Dad. See you, Mom. Later, Sooz.

Forrest: Excuse me.

Dr. Venter: Those children are in serious danger, Looey.

Richard Moneypenny: good

Mac D.: there u are

eldritch s. (GM): i think yeah she could be am ountie

the freemans all standing back to back

man who longs for death

they have popcorn in canada

Gabby isn't really frickin' following

Anton: W- Oh, many thank yous.