Tommy Saketharam

English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

Compare Less

He was repeatedly trying to keep his eyes opened during the seventh period of the day, a

period after which the school gets over. The sunlight was shining through the window and

reflected in his brown glowing eyes, in a room the class was still going on and students were

studying. All the students were wearing jackets and some even brought a blanket, but he did

not. Despite that, students were doing a good job resisting. Barry, in particular, was sitting

straight at the front table in the class, holding his pencil, his hands writing and him facing the

board. It was a long tiring day of school, studying right from the first period starting around

7 in the morning until 4 in the afternoon. At the moment the sound of the final bell of the day

was heard, the room was filled with noises of chatter and chairs squeaking for a certain

period of time and then replaced by a complete silence after a couple of minutes. After the

school was over, he walked to the table tennis court, in the down floor of the school and

waiting for his friends, Jerry, Leon, and Sam.

Heyy Barry,said a familiar voice from a distance that was getting closer, making him turn

around. In that direction, comes a boy walking slowly , his whole body appeared dark until

he came out of the shadow and was unveiled.

Hey Sam, how are you, havent seen you for a while, hows life?, said Barry.

Good, actually very good right nowreplied Sam.

Oh really, thats nice to hear, whats going on?, asked Barry.

I won the competition for scholarships to study abroad for 1 year at the Cambridge

university, and Ill be leaving within this week, Im so excited!!,said, Sam. Ohh, well,
Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

uhh.I guess thats good for you, right? replied Barry, his face looking down on the floor

as he speaks.

The sound of an accustomed voice chattering approaches in between the conversation.

Hello, friends, what are you guys talking about? asked Jerry, resting his arms on Barrys

shoulder.

Well, apparently, Sams got a scholarship to study in one of the best universities abroad and

will be going within a week, said Barry, crossing his arms over his chest, leaning backward

against a wall.

Oh damn, Did you Sam? shouted Jerry, congrats my friend added Jerry. Thanks, I wish

you both all the best here and do not forget me, replied Sam, smiling, laughing mildly.

Don't worry, we can still be in touch, text me or any of us whenever you have anything to

clarify or just want to chill out? said Jerry, as Barry was listening to the conversation, staring

at the view of the backyard.

Soon after, when schools final assessment exams were getting close and students are

preparing hard to do their best. Barry thought that he has to do better than he has ever done

before this time. Barry made a study schedule of subjects. At least thrice a week, he would go

for a tuition outside of school. One day at school, he asked Leon How is the preparation for

the coming exams going for you? stopping by, as he was holding onto a bunch of books.

Not too bad, just started studying a few days ago, the science subjects are not at all

something I would like studying for long, How about you? Leon replied.

Im doing the best I can, not trying to stress myself too much because otherwise, I would

start forgetting things I learned before, said Barry, stressing his face.
Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

Well, not stopping you but I see you studying very hard, I guess you should take some

break and enjoy your life more, like going to play football, watch a movie, with any of us,

how does that sound? said Leon, as he leaned on the wall beside him and crossed his legs.

You know what, that is something I really want to do, but Im scared that if I dont study as

much as or more than the previous time we had a exams, I would not be able to score as

much as I should or as much as I want to, I want to show and believe in myself that the hard

work I put into any kind of work or test pay off in the end, so I can be more confident with

myself said Barry, as his voice was becoming softer and faded quickly, frowning his

eyebrows.

Woah, hey said Leon, why ya look worried again?, I think that grades , exam results,

scores and all those kinda stuff are important, true, but it is not to such extent that the

happiness one deserves is taken away, all of us have the right to do what we want as long as it

is not harming other individuals in a negative way said Leon, as he was standing upright,

using his hand gestures as he was speaking.

That is very true, but hey, you know, you gotta lose some to win some, and I really want to

prove to myself that the effort I put in any work will get me results I want, said Barry, as he

was trying to hold himself from sighing.

Though, I would love to go out to hang out with you guys some day I swear, said he. I

cannot stop you from working hard on something you want to achieve bro, and I wish all the

best for u and good luck, said Leon, tapping Barrys shoulders twice.

So, where are you heading?asked Barry.

Oh, Umm... I and Jerry decided to go to play football along with a couple of his friends in

the campus, wanna join? said Leon.

Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

Nah, I actually used to like football, until once, I was playing for the team in my old school

and failed to score a goal when I was literally in front of it. No one blamed me for our loss

but I definitely felt badreplied Barry.

Hahaha..that happens, alright then replied Leon.

Thank you, dude, Aight, see ya later, have a good day, said Barry, waving his hand as he

was walking away. Bye, dude replied Leon, as he was walking to his dorm locating beside

the school.

As Barry reached home, he went in and opened a refrigerator and looked for a box of milk

and a small chocolate bars his mom bought and kept it , gobbled it as quickly as possible and

walk hurriedly upstairs to his room. He threw down his bag on the bed, laying down on the

bed beside his bag, closed his eyes for a second, thinking about the amount of work and

studies he will be doing. In a room, surrounded by a blue wall, filled with closets, computer,

bed and the books lying all over, he sat on a chair and tried to keep his tired looking eyes

opened. He took out several of his books from his bag, laid it on the table and opened them.

He turned on the lamp in front of the working table. His mind starts to quiet down as he as he

was staying still and became more focused on the books. The sunlight shining through the

window faded quickly and the shadows of the books that was lying beside him lowered until

it is covered by completely by darkness. Only the light from the lamp was left, as Barry was

continuing to do his jobs. His eyes were watering, blood vessels in it can be seen clearer.

I guess this is enough, I felt that I have done well today and I am feeling quite sleepy and

dizzy, little but thirsty too, he told himself, his voice cracking.

After a while, he stood up, turned off the light of the lamp and laid down on his bed harshly.

Within a minutes, he was asleep, still wearing his school uniform.

Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

At the day of exams, after it got over, Barry walked out of the room, looking for his friends,

who took exams in another room.

Hey, Leon Jerry, shouted Barry, as he was raising his hand up high when both of his

friends were walking in the opposite direction.

How did it go bro? asked Jerry, carrying his heavy bags on his back and smiling at him.

Pretty well, actually, I felt that I smash it this time, I think that I should be able to score

more than many people, said Barry , smiling out of his excitement.

Looks like you really did well this time, I have never really seen you smiling or looking so

happy like this before, all those times before, I only see you doing nothing else but worry

about grades, said Leon, crossing his arms over his chest as he as he was speaking and

smiling.

I hope that your hard work paid off dude, said he. But remember one thing Barry, said

Jerry.

Dont over expect things sometimes because literally, anything could happen, just saying,

mate. Barry nodded his head and looked understood.

Results came out just the day after and it was a Saturday. Barry woke up around the time at

which he would be studying his third-period subject on his normal school days. It was a cold

morning and the sun was shining from the other side of his room and the shadow of the books

lying on his table was emerging from the ground. There was a sound of the morning birds

singing, from a distance, penetrating into his bedroom. He stepped out from his bed, rubbing

his eyes, stretching his body and put on his glasses. The bed was still untidy and one of his

pillows fell on the floor. His long brown hair was reflecting the light from outside, making it

look even browner, but was in a condition as if he never combed his hair for a week. He sat
Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

on his working chair and turned on his computer and turned off the air conditioner inside in

his room. His hands were shaky and couldnt handle the mouse properly. He was shivering.

He opened his grade book. At the moment he saw his exam results, his heart fell down to his

legs, his eyebrows knitted.

Uhh. Damn it yelling at himself. He remained silent and was reminded of what Jerry told

him yesterday and what he told them. He was stunned for a couple of minutes. He wasnt

making any sounds and the room remained relatively silent except for the sound of the birds

chirping. He was holding his hands more and more tightly, and smashed it hard against the

table, creating a loud noise that covered the entire room.

Goddamn it, is this enough to top the class? well, lets see, there shouldnt be a lot who got

more than me, talking to himself. He picked up his charging phone that was placed on the

beside his bed and immediately.

Hey, Leon, I got something to ask you,said Barry, his voice sounded strange and unusual

in a passive way.

whats up?replied Leon.

How were the results for you?asked Barry.

you called me at the right time, even Im checking it right now, it seemed I got 97%, the

average for all subjects and you know what, I have been told by many other friends they did

very well too, so I think that this time, everyone did excellent replied Leon.

The moment he heard what Leon said, he felt pain through his chest slowly and gradually as

he repeated Leons saying in his mind. It was almost like the feeling of the heart being

stabbed, and the magnitude of pain increases over time, as it is being filled with thoughts of
Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

what Leon told him. His body was shaking even more, and at that moment he couldnt hear

anything else, and tears started running from his eyes across his face slowly.

How about Jerry?, do you know how well he did?asked Barry.

Owh, that guy?, hahah.. you dont know him enough then, he did not even open his

gradebook last years finals replied Leon, laughing while he speaks.

Hmmm.., ok thenreplied Barry.

How about ya? asked Leon.

91%, all subjects combined, replied Barry.

Well, uh, what do you think, replied Leon.

Dude, all these times I have spent..said Barry.

I dont know, I dont know whats going on, said he.

Woah, hey, calm down for now, alright, why are you worried, That wasnt a bad score,was

it? said Leon, as he was putting his phones more closely to his ears, his face frowning.

How is this even possible, I worked so hard and I got less than you!, said Barry. his

voices pitch increase.

Bro, why are you., are you basing your score on mine, this is not right, said Leon.

I have worked much harder than you did!, you have no idea how tiring it was the past

several weeks, I hated to sit in just one place and read over things again and again, said

Barry his voice getting louder.

Woah, Whats wrong Buddy, you been through bad dreams or something? Why so serious

about it? asked Leon as gently as he could.

Of course you can say that you got an A+, why worry right? said Barry, tightening his hand.

Hey, All you gotta do now is calm down alright?, said Leon.
Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

Hey, Its ok man, I will try to manage myself, sorry for bothering and yelling at you, I did

not mean to,said Barry, hung up right after as he threw his phones on his bed and walked out

the room and shut the door.

Heyy you, wait shouted Leon, where are you going, Are you really okay? shouted once

again, left talking alone for a second and realized his friend hung up. Barry walked down the

stairs of his house without making a lot of noise and outside the house, he walked to his

garden at the back of his house. Although the sun was shining, the Barry was still shivering.

The place was green, filled with flowers and butterflies roaming around. The grasses were

covered with dews and the shadows of the plants falling on him were jumping up high and

then down. He sat on an old stone chair in the back garden.

What happened, why did I fail to do what I want to achieve, did I not work hard enough for

it?he said quietly in his mind, Do we all have a fixed amount of quality in something from

birth?, or is everything that happen in this world out of our control?Everything in this world

happens randomly?, Can I not become better at something that someone else, he added.

He was putting his hand on his forehead, resting his hands on his knees and closed his eyes.

He slowly felt the stress and the heat flowing across inside his head and closed his eyes.

Did Leon work and study as hard as I did, did he devote his time to studying more than I

did, he didn't even look as if he cared a lot about his studies, I dont know, I dont know

anything at all? said he softly to himself. He stopped shivering and the sun was rising up

higher, and the shadow of the plants on him disappeared.

What does it take for one to become consistently good with something? if not hard work? ,

mumbling softly to himself.

Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

I did the best I could, did I expect too much?True, though, I dont know what others did,

due to which they could do well, or at least better than me added softly. He put his hand

down on his knees.

I really did the best I could do the exam, the score wasnt horrible either, why am I

feeling disheartened with it, I just want to be happy, rethinking, saying he with a louder

voice. The results couldnt be any different than this, could it? It was all I could do, and

without my determination, It could have been even worse, right?,asking himself. Leon

might have gone through much more than I did, is that right? yeah, and I could never have

known that, and it wouldnt even be fair to him, assuming the effort put in by him is more

than me but scored less, and Even Sam, He might have worked so hard for that competition

to get the scholarship and I acted as if I did not care, talking to himself. He ran up the stairs

back to his room and saw his phone vibrating. He picked it up and ignored the phone call and

started dialing. Hey there Sam, said Barry.

Hi, uh whats going on, Barry?replied Sam, hesitatingly.

I want to clarify with you about something, you got the time, right? said Barry, speaking

quickly and his voice sounded unclear.

Well, yeah, actually it is getting quite late at night here and I need to go soon, so if you

could do it fast, that would be fine replied Sam.

Although this might seem weird but I wanted to say that uhh I am uh... I am sorry that I

acted as if I did not care the day you have come to me and told me what you achieved, I am

really sorrysaid Barry.

Huh, Barry, what did you say? you said you are sorry?replied Sam.

Yeah, I really did not mean to hurt you or anything, he said.

Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

It has been months since that happened and you are saying this now? I almost forgot about

it Sam said.

You did not congratulate me for my success and you did not even say goodbye when I left,

you know how terrible it felt to be ignored by other people, especially when they are close to

you? added Sam.

But uhh.. Barry tried to interrupt

I was trying to hide my feelings for that because I knew we were parting and I did not want

to do so unpleasantly, so I pretended as if nothing has happened Sam continued.

Dude, please, I am already feeling so disheartened and I just want to get this out of my head,

you do not understand what my situation is right now!! replied Barry, increasing his volume.

Will you please forgive me, I am sorry, alright?he added.

Okay, calm down, I will forgive you for what you did..but I am sorry to say that uhh...I

have lost good feelings, memories, and trust. After I left, I missed my old friends so much

and I was reminded of you, Leon and Jerry, and also how you have reacted to me and I cried

so muchsaid Sam, his voice became softer and almost sounded as if he will start crying any

moment.

I have to go now, sorry replied Sam.

Wait, no please dont go!!shouted Barry.

Tears from both of his eyes start flowing down his face and he sat on the bed, hugging his

legs and lay his head down on his knees. He cried until he felt no strength and fell down on

his bed. After a few hours, he opened his eyes, felt the strain flowing out from his head and

the relief draining down slowly away from his body. He saw the phone vibrating and slowly
Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016

stretch his hands to reach it while he was laying down on his bed. He picked it up, brought it

close to his ears.

Dude, where have you been, what did you do? you alright Leon asking out of curiousness.

Calm down, my dear friend, everything is finesaid Barry.

A couple of months later, after the next exam was over, results came out. Barry was sitting

beside a wall that was blocking the sunlight him on the down floor of the school building,

right after the school was over. The atmosphere was covered with noises of people chatting

and table tennis ball bouncing all over the places. He turned on his laptop, opened his grade

book, his hands operating the computer smoothly, the gentle cool wind breeze was

continuously blowing across the place, the trees beside were not influenced by the wind and

the sun was shining from the river. He received 89% for the average of all subjects. He closed

his laptop with two hands softly, kept it in his bag and stared at the river and the trees

surrounding, as he smiled.
Tommy Saketharam
English 1109
Mr. Jamie Schelz
08/12/2016