Student 1 chose aqueducts as the invention that was most impactful to Ancient Roman civilization.

This writing sample

showed significant improvement in comparison to Unit Two. Here, they mostly write in complete sentences and were able
to meet the length requirement. They address most parts of the prompt and reference a text to support their claim.
 Criterion A: Knowing and Understanding & Criterion C: Communicating

MYP CMS Achievement Level Descriptor: A Achievement Level Descriptor: C Task Clarification

0 40 ❏ The student does not reach a standard ❏ The student does not reach a - xYour
described by any of the descriptors standard described by any of paragraph
below. the descriptors below. should
describe
1-2 60-65 The student: The student: the impact
of the
(2-4) ❏ recognizes some vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and
innovation/
❏ demonstrates basic knowledge and ideas in a style that is not
invention.
understanding of content and always clear - Your
concepts through limited descriptions ❏ Inconsistently lists sources, not paragraph
and/or examples. following task instructions should
explain
3-4 70-75 The student: The student: how the
(6-8) ❏ uses some vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and innovation/
❏ demonstrates satisfactory knowledge ideas in a style that is invention
and understanding of content and somewhat clear was used.
- Your
concepts through simple descriptions, ❏ lists sources in a way that
paragraph
explanations, and/or examples. sometimes follows task
should
instructions include
details on
5-6 The student: The student: why you
(10- 80- ❏ uses considerable relevant ❏ Communicates information and think the
12) 85 vocabulary, often accurately ideas in a style that is mostly innovation/
❏ demonstrates substantial knowledge clear invention
and understanding of content and ❏ lists sources in a way that often had a
concepts through descriptions, follows task instructions significant
explanations, and examples. impact.
- You should
include
7-8 90- The student: The student:
textual
(14- 98 ❏ consistently uses relevant vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and evidence
16) accurately ideas in a style that is from a
❏ demonstrates excellent knowledge completely clear related
and understanding of content and ❏ lists sources in a way that task in this
concepts through detailed follows task instructions unit.
descriptions, explanations, and
examples.

Total Feedback:

IBMYP: 10 - I like how you used the homework to consider another impact of aqueducts.
CMS: 80 -You used complete sentences most of the time and need to remember punctuation!
- I did not see much usage of content vocabulary
- Don’t forget to answer the question in relation to the Ancient Roman Empire - this particularly impacted
paragraph 2.

Student 2 selected the Twelve Tables as the most impactful innovation in Ancient Rome. Their writing shows major
improvement. At this point in the year, they were able to consistently write in complete sentences and use punctuation
accurately. They answer all parts of the question but would benefit from more breadth and depth in their responses.
 Criterion A: Knowing and Understanding & Criterion C: Communicating

MYP CMS Achievement Level Descriptor: A Achievement Level Descriptor: C Task Clarification

0 40 ❏ The student does not reach a standard ❏ The student does not reach a - xYour
described by any of the descriptors standard described by any of paragraph
below. the descriptors below. should
describe
1-2 60-65 The student: The student: the impact
of the
(2-4) ❏ recognizes some vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and
innovation/
❏ demonstrates basic knowledge and ideas in a style that is not
invention.
understanding of content and always clear - Your
concepts through limited descriptions ❏ Inconsistently lists sources, not paragraph
and/or examples. following task instructions should
explain
3-4 70-75 The student: The student: how the
(6-8) ❏ uses some vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and innovation/
❏ demonstrates satisfactory knowledge ideas in a style that is invention
and understanding of content and somewhat clear was used.
- Your
concepts through simple descriptions, ❏ lists sources in a way that
paragraph
explanations, and/or examples. sometimes follows task
should
instructions include
details on
5-6 The student: The student: why you
(10- 80- ❏ uses considerable relevant ❏ Communicates information and think the
12) 85 vocabulary, often accurately ideas in a style that is mostly innovation/
❏ demonstrates substantial knowledge clear invention
and understanding of content and ❏ lists sources in a way that often had a
concepts through descriptions, follows task instructions significant
explanations, and examples. impact.
- You should
include
7-8 90- The student: The student:
textual
(14- 98 ❏ consistently uses relevant vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and
evidence
16) accurately ideas in a style that is from a
❏ demonstrates excellent knowledge completely clear related task
and understanding of content and ❏ lists sources in a way that in this unit.
concepts through detailed follows task instructions
descriptions, explanations, and
examples.

Total Feedback:

IBMYP: 12 - Excellent connection to the lasting impact of the Twelve Tables!

CMS: 85 - Nice use of vocabulary from the unit (esp. Patricians & plebeians)
-Your description of the twelve tables is lacking depth! You should include more details about it
- Please remember to make note of the specific passage you used! Your information is accurate but it is
unclear where the passage is

Student 3 chose roads and highways as the innovation that was most impactful to Ancient Roman civilization.
Their writing demonstrates major progress in their ability to write in Social Studies. They provide strong
reasoning for their choice and are able to support their opinion with evidence from multiple sources. This
student used complete sentences and accurate punctuation. They responded to all parts of the prompt, but the
breadth and depth varied.
Back of Paper:

Criterion A: Knowing and Understanding & Criterion C: Communicating

MYP CMS Achievement Level Descriptor: A Achievement Level Descriptor: C Task Clarification

0 40 ❏ The student does not reach a standard ❏ The student does not reach a - Your
described by any of the descriptors standard described by any of paragraph
below. the descriptors below. should
describe
1-2 60-65 The student: The student: the impact
of the
(2-4) ❏ recognizes some vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and
innovation/
❏ demonstrates basic knowledge and ideas in a style that is not
invention.
understanding of content and always clear - Your
concepts through limited descriptions ❏ Inconsistently lists sources, not paragraph
and/or examples. following task instructions should
explain
3-4 70-75 The student: The student: how the
(6-8) ❏ uses some vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and innovation/
❏ demonstrates satisfactory knowledge ideas in a style that is invention
and understanding of content and somewhat clear was used.
- xYour
concepts through simple descriptions, ❏ lists sources in a way that
paragraph
explanations, and/or examples. sometimes follows task
should
instructions include
details on
5-6 The student: The student: why you
(10- 80- ❏ uses considerable relevant ❏ Communicates information and think the
12) 85 vocabulary, often accurately ideas in a style that is mostly innovation/
❏ demonstrates substantial knowledge clear invention
and understanding of content and ❏ lists sources in a way that often had a
concepts through descriptions, follows task instructions significant
explanations, and examples. impact.
- You should
include
7-8 90- The student: The student:
textual
(14- 98 ❏ consistently uses relevant vocabulary ❏ Communicates information and
evidence
16) accurately ideas in a style that is from a
❏ demonstrates excellent knowledge completely clear related task
and understanding of content and ❏ lists sources in a way that in this unit.
concepts through detailed follows task instructions
descriptions, explanations, and
examples.

Total Feedback:

IBMYP: 13 - Paragraphs well organized and communicated your point clearly

CMS: 88 -The connections you made added depth to your point! I love that you are thinking about how this
invention directly impacts you today.
-I like your use of sources and quotes from the unit - remember to be explicit on where they came from!
- This would really be strengthened by including relevant vocabulary words