6.

Childhood:

Childhood, after reason has begun her

sway, seems to us the happiest
season of life. It is also the critical
period. At this time they receive those
impressions and contract those habits
which impel them towards the good
and true or towards the evil and false.

The child's soul is without character. It

is a rudimental existence, pure as the
driven snow—beautiful as a cherub
angel, spotless, guileless, and
innocent. It is the chart of a man yet
to be filled up with the elements of a
character. These elements are first
outlined by the parents. With what
delicacy should they use the pencil of
personal influence! The soul is soft,
and the lines they make are deep and
not easily erased. It is a man they
form. Responsible work! It is an
immortal soul they work upon,
destined to survive the wreck of
matter and the crush of worlds, and to
show in its character forever some
distant trace, at least, of their work.

Mother and Child

Engraved & Printed by Illman

Brothers.

MOTHER AND CHILD.

Never believe any thing that concerns

children to be of no importance. A
hasty word is of consequence. The
little things that they see and hear
about them mold them for eternity.
Observe how very quick the child's eye
is to perceive the meaning of looks,
voices, and motions. It peruses all
faces, colors, and sounds. Every
sentiment that looks into its eye is
reflected therefrom, and plays in
miniature on its countenance. The
tear that steals down the cheek of a
mother's suppressed grief gathers the
little infantile face into a sob. With a
wondering silence it studies the
mother in her prayers, and looks up
with her in that exploring watch which
signifies unspoken prayer. If the child
be tended with impatience, or coolly
and with a lack of motherly
gentleness, it straightway shows by
its action that it, too, feels the sting of
just that which is felt towards it. And
thus it is angered by anger, fretted by
fretfulness, irritated by irritation,
having impressed upon it just that
kind of impatience or ill-nature which
is felt towards it, and growing
faithfully into the bad mold as by a
fixed law.

However apparently trivial the

influences which contribute to form
the character of the child, they endure
through life. Those impulses to
conduct which last the longest and
are rooted the deepest always have
their origin near our birth. It is there
that the germs of virtue or vice, of
feeling or sentiment, are first
implanted which determine the
character for life. It is in childhood
that the mind is most open to
impression, and ready to be kindled by
the first spark that flies into it. The
first thing continues always with the
child. The first joy, the first failure, the
first achievement, the first
misadventure, paint the foreground of
life.

Influence is as quiet and

imperceptible on the child's mind as
the falling of snowflakes on the
meadows. One can not tell the hour
when the human mind is not in the
condition of receiving impressions
from exterior moral forces. In
innumerable instances the most
secret and unnoticed influences have
been in operation for months, and
even years, to break down the
strongest barriers of the human heart,
and work out its moral ruin while yet
the fondest parents and friends have
been unaware of the working of such
unseen agents of evil.
Children are more easily led to be
good by examples of loving kindness
and tales of well-doing in others than
threatened into obedience by records
of sin, crime, and punishment. Then
strive to impress on the child's mind
sincerity, truth, honesty, benevolence,
and their kindred virtues, and the
welfare of your child, not only for this
life, but for the life to come, will be
assured. What a responsibility it is to
form a creature, the frailest and
feeblest that heaven has made, into
the intelligent and fearless sovereign
of the whole animated universe, the
interpreter, adorer, and almost
representative of Divinity!

There is much mistaken kindness in

the management of children. The law
of love is great, but it showeth not its
full strength, save when united with
kindness. Make your children helpful
and useful, and you make them happy.
Let them early form habits of
neatness, and when you are weary you
will not have to wait on their
carelessness.

Teach them to give you courteous

speech and manners, and they will live
to honor you. Take pains to have the
home attractions stronger than can
come from outside influences. It is a
sad fact that few children confide in
their parents. The parents must take
an interest in them, and draw them to
their hearts instead of repelling them
away. There is no mystery in attaching
children to one's self. If you love them,
they will love you. If you make much
of them, they will make much of you.
They can readily pick out the
children's friend among many. They
have a quick way of discerning who
really love them and who care for
them.

Parents do not think how far a word of

praise will ofttimes go with children.
Praise is sunshine to a child, and there
is no child who does not need it. It is
the high reward of one's struggle to do
right. Many a sensitive child hungers
for commendation. Many a child,
starving for the praise which parents
should give, runs off eagerly after the
designing flattery of others. To
withhold praise where it is due is
dishonest, and, in the case of a child,
such a course often leaves a stinging
sense of injustice. One may as well
think to rear flowers in frost as to
think of educating children
successfully in rebuff and constant
criticism. Judicious flattery is almost
one of the necessities of existence
with children. Indiscriminate flattery
is, of course, bad. When it becomes
necessary to reprove children, use the
gentlest form of address under the
circumstances. Reproof must not fall
like a violent storm, breaking down
and making those to droop whom it is
meant to cherish and refresh. It must
descend as the dew upon the tender
herb, or like melting flakes of snow.
The softer it falls, the longer it dwells
upon, and the deeper it sinks into, the
mind.

Never reprove the little ones before

strangers; for children are as
sensitive, if not more so, than older
persons, and wish strangers to think
well of them. When reproved before
any one with whom they are not well
acquainted, their vanity is wounded.
They have self-respect, and such
mortification of it is dangerous. Praise
spurs a child on to earnest effort;
blame, when administered before
visitors, takes away the power of
doing well.

It is the parents' duty to make their

children's childhood full of love and
childhood's proper joyousness. Not all
the appliances that wealth can buy are
necessary to the free and happy
unfolding of childhood in body, mind,
and heart. But children must have love
inside the house, and fresh air and
good play and companionship
outside; otherwise young life runs the
danger of withering and growing
stunted, or, at best, prematurely old
and turned inward on itself. There is
something in loving dependent
children, in tender care for them,
which bestows upon the soul the most
enriching of its experience. They
make us tender and sympathetic, and
a thousand times reward us for all we
do for them. We are indebted to them
for constant incentives to noble living;
for the perpetual reminder that we do
not live for ourselves alone. For their
sake we are admonished to put from
us the debasing appetite, the
unworthy impulse; to gather into our
lives every noble and heroic quality,
every tender and attractive grace. We
owe them gratitude for the dark hour
their presence has brightened; for the
helplessness and dependence which
have won us from ourselves; for the
faith and trust which it is evermore
their mission to renew; for their
kisses, wet with tears, placed on
brows that, but for their caressing,
had furrowed into frowns.

The gleeful laugh of happy children is

the best home music, and the graceful
figures of childhood are the best
statuary. They are well-springs of
pleasure, messengers of peace and
love, resting-places for innocence,
links between angels and men. Their
eyes, those clear wells of undefiled
thought,—what is more beautiful? Full
of hope, love, and curiosity, they meet
your own. In prayer, how earnest; in
joy, how sparkling; in sympathy, how
tender! The man or woman who never
tried the companionship of a little
child has carelessly passed by one of
the greatest pleasures of life, as one
passes a rare flower without plucking
or knowing its value. A home, and no
children,—it is like a lantern, and no
candle; a garden, and no flowers; a
vine, and no grapes; a brook, and no
water gurgling and gushing in its
channels.

Nature affords striking proofs of

foresight and wisdom in making the
bonds of parental sympathy so
invincibly strong and lasting. During
childhood and youth, and even
afterwards, when these charming
epochs of life have passed away, the
ties of constancy and attachment
continue to prevail. Were not the
chords of love thus strengthened, they
would frequently be snapped asunder;
for the severest trials which the world
knows are those which assail the
parental heart and pierce it with the
deepest sorrows.

How fleeting are the happiness and

innocent guilelessness of childhood!
The years as they come bring with
them intelligence and experience; but
they take with them, in their resistless
course, the innocent pleasures of
childhood's years. Then deal gently,
patiently, and kindly with them. You
may be nearly over the rough pathway
of life yourselves; make the only time
of life that they can call happy as
pleasant as possible. "Our children,"
says Madame de Stael, "who are
tenderly reared by us, are soon
destined for others than ourselves.
They soon stride rapidly forward in the
career of life, while we fall slowly
back. They soon begin to regard their
parents in the light of memory and to
look upon others in the light of hope."

They will not trouble you long.

Children grow up; nothing on earth
grows so fast as children. It was but
yesterday and that lad was playing
with tops, a buoyant boy. He is a man
now. There is no more childhood for
him or for us. Life has claimed him.
When a beginning is made, it is like a
raveling stocking; stitch by stitch
gives way till all are gone. The house
has not a child left in it; there is no
more noise in the hall; no boys rush in,
pell-mell; it is very orderly now. There
are no more skates or sleds, bats,
balls, or strings left scattered about.
There are no more gleeful laughs of
happy girls, or dolls left to litter the
best room. There is no delay for
sleeping folks; there is no longer any
task before you lie down. But the
mother's heart is heavy, and the
father's house is lonely.

Brother and Sister Brother and Sister

The affections that exist between the

members of the same family afford a
pleasing spectacle of human
happiness. That which exists between
brother and sister should be
assiduously cultivated. It is a beautiful
and lovely feeling, and seems to be
wholly angelic in its thoughts and
feelings. It must necessarily be a pure,
spiritual love. It arises, not from a
sense of gratitude, or for favors
received, or from any thing save the
endearing relationship of family. It
rests not on any thing but a spiritual
affinity of soul. It should be cultivated
as one of the sweetest plants in the
garden of the heart. It should be
watered every morning and evening
with the dews of good nature, and
sunned all day with the light of
kindness. It should hear nothing but
loving and tender words, even the
dulcet music of home; see nothing but
smiles and the tokens of confidence
and sympathy, and know nothing but
its own spirit of tenderness and unity.

How large and cherished a place does

a good sister's love always hold in the
grateful memory of one who has been
blessed with the benefit of this
relation! How many are there who, in
the changes of mature years, have
found a sister's love their ready and
adequate resource! With what a sense
of security is confidence reposed in a
good sister, and with what assurance
that it will be uprightly and
considerately given is her counsel
sought! How intimate is the friendship
of such a brother and sister not widely
separated in age from one another!

What a reliance for warning, caution,

and sympathy has each secured in
each! How many are the brothers who,
when thrown into circumstances of
temptation, have found the thought of
a sister's love a constant, holy
presence, rebuking every wayward
thought! How many brothers are there
from whom death separated the sister
years ago who yet feel her influence
thrown around them like sweet
incense from an unseen censer; who
are arrested, when just about to take a
downward step, by the memory of a
reproving look from eyes that have
long been closed; who have pursued
their weary path of duty, cheered by
the remembrance of a smile from lips
that will never smile again!

Who can tell the thoughts that cluster

around the word sister? How ready
she is to forgive the foibles of a
brother! She never deserts him. In
adversity she clings closely to him,
and in trial she cheers him. When the
bitter voice of reproach is poured in
his ears she is ever ready to hush its
hard tones, and to turn his attention
away from its painful notes. Let him
move in pleasant paths, she hangs
clusters of flowers about him.
In watching his favored career and
listening to his eulogy she feels the
purest satisfaction. The cold grave
can not crush her affections for him—
it outlives her tears and sighs; and
hence she often wanders to the spot
where he reposes with the fragrant
rose-bush and creeping honeysuckle,
and plants them on his tomb; and who
will dare to affirm her love perishes
when she passes away from earth?
May it not live far off in the glorious
land, increasing in fervor and intensity
as the years of eternity pass away?

Affection does not beget weakness,

nor is it effeminate for a brother to be
firmly attached to a sister. Such a boy
will make a noble and brave man. The
young man who was accustomed to
kiss his sweet, innocent sister night
and morning as they met shows its
influence upon him. He will never
forget it, and when he shall take some
one to his heart as his wife she shall
reap the golden fruits thereof. The
young man who is in the habit of
giving his arm to his sister as they
walk to and from church will never
leave his wife to find her way as best
she can. He who has been trained to
see that his sister was seated before
he sought his own will never mortify a
neglected wife in the presence of
strangers. And the young man who
frequently handed his sister to her
chair at the table will never have
cause to blush as he sees some
gentleman extend to his wife the
courtesy she knows is due from him.
The intercourse of brother and sister
forms an important element in the
happy influence of home. A
boisterous or a selfish boy may try to
domineer over the weaker or more
dependent girl. But generally the latter
exerts a softening influence. The
brother animates and heartens; the
sister modifies and refines. The vine-
tree and its sustaining elm are the
emblems of such a relation; and by
such agencies our "sons may become
like plants grown up in youth, and our
daughters like corner-stones polished
after the similitude of a temple."

Sisters scarcely know the influence

they have over their brothers. A young
man is pretty much what his sister
and young lady friends choose to
make him. If sisters are watchful and
affectionate they may in various ways
lead them along till their characters
are formed, and then a high respect
for ladies and a manly self-respect
will keep them from mingling in low
society.

Girls, especially those who are

members of a large family, have a
great influence at home, where
brothers delight in their sisters, and
where parents look fondly down on
their daughters. Girls have much in
their power with regard to those boys;
they have in their power to make them
gentler, truer, purer; to give them
higher opinion of woman; to soften
their manner and ways; to tone down
rough places, and shape sharp,
angular corners. They should interest
themselves in their pursuits, and show
them by every means in their power
that they do not consider them and
their doings beneath their notice.

But few sisters realize how much they

have to do with the welfare of their
brothers—how much it is in their
power to win them to the right modes
of thoughts and actions by little acts
of sisterly attentions. If they would but
spare an hour now and then from their
peculiar employment to their boyish
sports, and not turn contemptuously
away from the books and
amusements in which they delight,
they would soon find how a gentle
word would turn off a sharp answer;
how a genial look would effectually
reprove an unfitting expression; how
gratefully a small kindness would be
received, and how unbounded would
be the power for good they would
obtain by a continuance of such
conduct.

Fortunate is the family that possesses

such an elder sister. The mother
confides in her, the father takes pride
in her ability to aid and cheer the
household, and the younger ones lean
upon her. By her counsels, her
example, her influence, she may do as
much as the parents to give to the
family life. She is at once companion
and counselor for the younger
members, since separated by only a
brief interval from the sports of
childhood she can sympathize easily
with the little wants and little griefs
that fill the child's heart to
overflowing, and show it how to
compass its desires and forget its
sorrows. A short girlhood is usually
the allotment of the oldest daughter;
but this is more than made up to her
in the long and delightful
companionship she has with her
mother, in the sense she is made to
have of her own importance in the
family, and the unusual capability she
is obliged by the force of
circumstances to acquire and display.

It is a law of our being that no

improvement that takes place in either
of the sexes is confined to itself; each
is the universal mirror to each, and the
refinements of the one will always be
in reciprocal proportion to the polish
of the other. The brother and sister
should grow up together, be educated
at the same school, engage in the
same sports, and, as far as
practicable, in the same labors. Their
joys and sorrows, tastes and aims,
should be mutual as far as possible.
The same moral lessons, obligations,
and duties should bear upon them. It
is an error that the youths of our land
are separated in so many of the most
important duties of life.

Much evil is caused by mistaken

opinions on this point. The girls are
taught that it is not pretty to be with
the boys and the boys that it is not
manly to be with the girls, while at the
same time the society of each is
necessary for the best development
of character in the other. When they
do meet it is only for sport and
nonsense, to cajole and deceive each
other. Hence the good influence they
should have upon each other is in a
great measure lost. They are
unacquainted with each other, know
not each other's natures, and have but
little interest in each other's business
and duties.

We want the girls to rival the boys in

all that is good, refined, and
ennobling. We want them to rival the
boys, as they well can, in learning, in
understanding, in all noble qualities of
mind and heart, but not in any of the
rougher qualities and traits. We want
the girls to be gentle—not weak, but
gentle—and kind and affectionate. We
want to be sure that wherever a girl is
there should be a sweet, subduing,
and harmonizing influence of purity
and truth and love pervading and
hallowing from center to
circumference the entire circle in
which she moves. It is her mission to
instruct the boys in all needful lessons
of neatness and order, of patience and
goodness.

We want the boys to be gentle,

courteous, and considerate towards
their younger sisters; to be the
protector and emulator of their
virtues. We want to be sure that where
there is a boy there will go forth the
influence inspired by the courage of
manly self-respect—a respect that
keeps him from mingling in low
society. We want him to be every whit
a man, a fit friend and companion for
true womanhood. We want to see
them both enjoy the Spring-time of
life, for this is the season of joy, of
bliss, of strength, of pride; it is the
treasury of life, in which nature stores
up those riches which are for our
future employment and profit. Youth is
to age what the flower is to the fruit,
the leaf to the tree, the sand to the
glass. Hence we want to see them
both so using the golden age of youth
as to be able to reap a rich harvest in
the years of maturity.