PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

COPING WITH STRESS IN MIDDLE AND LATE ADOLESCENCE

STRESS- is defined as a reaction of the mind and body to a stimulus that disturbs the well- being, state of
calm, or equilibrium of a person.

Point of View about stress:

1. Stress as stimulus- stress is caused by situations that may be life threatening or life changing.
2. Stress as a response- is the way the body reacts to challenging situations.
3. Stress as relational- is when a person experiencing stress takes a step back to look at the
situation that is causing the stress and assesses it.

HEALTHY STRESS- stress that is short and sporadic. These types of stress can motivate, energize and
spur and individual into fruitful action

Sources of Stressors

1. External stressors- are those that come outside of you like situations, people, and experiences.
2. Internal stressors- are those coming from within you, like thoughts that you have that caused
you to feel fearful, uncertainties about the future, lack of control over situations and even
personal beliefs.

STRESSORS OF ADOLESCENTS

1. School demands and expectation- quizzes and test, home works and projects, oral recitation,
quarterly and final exams, and grades.
2. Selecting a school, college course, or career- entrance exams, aptitude test, deciding on what
course and where and what they end up doing after college.
3. Separation anxiety- separation from some of their friends or best friend.
4. College life- meeting and adjusting to new people. The unfamiliarity of new environment.
5. Romantic relationships or lack of it- a tendency to feel awkward when they are not in a special
relationship with someone.
6. Family demands and expectations- the parents are the one deciding and think they know better
than their children.
7. Healthy concerns- unhealthy lifestyle that often lead to lifetime diseases.
8. Demands of social life- forming groups or joining one makes an adolescent feel safe and secure.
In order to become part of a group, the individual has to have common interest with other
members.
9. Bullying- it may cause emotional and psychological trauma to individual experiencing it.

Problem- focused- when remedies and solutions are thought of to change the situation to lessen the
stress.

Emotion- focused- when the objective is to lessen the emotional impact caused by the stressful
situations.

COPING WITH STRESS

1. Conduct creative imagery of the problem- look at the stressor as a relational situation where
you can assess and change the way you look at the stressful situation.
2. Seek group or social support- talk to people you know and trust, surround yourself with friends.
3. Get into relaxation activities- breathing exercises, regular physical exercise, meditation, yoga,
reading books and listening music.
4. Create situation where you can feel more relaxed- a quiet environment or a comfortable
position, and project a passive attitude toward the stressor.
5. Learn to manage your time- analyse how much time you are spending and see where you are
spending more time.
6. Eat properly by selecting nutritious, healthy food. Eat regularly and avoid skipping meals.
PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP

*RELATIONSHIP- the way in w/c two or more people or things are connected.

*PERSONAL RELATIONSHIP- this is the type of relationship w/c closely associated with a person and w/c
can only have meaning to this person.

*Privacy and Intimacy- are the characteristics that define personal relationship.

THREE ATTACHMENT STYLES

1. Secure Attachment-is when the primary caregiver is most of the time present and available and
when all the emotional needs of infant are met.
- A child who is exposed to this style of attachment will grow up to have more secure and stable
relationships.
2. Avoidant attachment- is when the primary caregiver is cold and detached, and even
unresponsive to a child’s needs.
- A child who experienced this style of attachment will oftentimes experience unstable
relationship in future.
3. Anxious -ambivalent attachment- when the primary caregiver is not consistent in terms of
presence and meeting a child’s emotional needs.
- A person who experienced this in childhood may develop separation anxieties with love one.

THREE STAGES IN FALLING IN LOVE ( HELEN FISHER)

1. LUST- you feel physically attracted and drawn to the object of your affection. Is driven by sex
hormones, testosterone and estrogen.
2. ATTRACTION- is described as the lovestruck phase, which involves neurotransmitters in the
brain such as dopamine, neropinephrine and serotonin. In this stage feel craving of his presence.
3. ATTACHMENT- when the couple in love decides to continue with the relationship, they enter
the attachment stage where long lasting commitments are exchanged and may lead raising a
family.

Other Reasons Why People attracted To One Another ( ROZENBERG QUARTERLY)

1. Transference Effect- we meet people who we immediately like or dislike.

2. Propinquity Effect- we often develop a sense of familiarity with people who live close to us.
3. Similarity- we often like people who we have similarities with, such as social class background,
religious beliefs, age, and education.
4. Reciprocity- we like people who like us back.
5. Physical Attractiveness- appearance is a major factor in liking someone usually first impression
counts.
6. Personality Characteristics and Traits- people get attracted to characteristics that lead to liking
the other person.

THREE COMPONENTS OF LOVE ( as theorized in Robert Sternberg’s Triangular Theory of Love)

1. INTIMACY – that lovely moment when someone understand and validate us.
2. COMMITMENT- is an act of deciding to consistently fulfil and live by agreements made with
another person.
3. PASSION- as defined in generic terms, is the intense state of being that drives and consumes a
person to pursue an interest, a vision, or a person.