1.

Behaving like a Perfect Gentleman

1. ORNAMENT OF A VAISNAVA DEVOTEE

Vaisnava etiquettes are not superficial or inessential.

Sri Caitanya Mahaprabhu spoke as follows: (Cc Antya 4.128-30)
" It is the characteristic of a devotee to observe and the protect the Vaisnava etiquette. Maintenance of the
Vaisnava etiquette is the ornament of a devotee."
• So it is stated, "Etiquette is the ornament of a Vaisnava." If one is very rich, he will be adorned with
only the finest of garments and ornaments. Similarly, for one who is profound in his Krsna
consciousness, the jewels of Vaisnava etiquette will naturally grace all of his dealings and activities.
• The characteristics of a devotee are always sublimely manifest in all of his speech, actions and
behaviour. “titikshavah karunika suhrdah sarva dehinam, ajata shatravah shaantaah…”
“The symptoms of a sädhu are that he is tolerant, merciful and friendly to all living entities. He has no
enemies, he is peaceful, he abides by the scriptures, and all his characteristics are sublime.”
[SB 3.25.21]
• We need to be aware that the vast majority of our exchanges are with devotees and the innocent public.
We should avoid criticism by cultivating AUSTERITIES of body, mind and words through humility,
sober and grave behaviour.
deva-dvija-guru-präjïa- püjanaà çaucam ärjavam
brahmacaryam ahiàsä ca çäréraà tapa ucyate
“Austerity of the body consists in worship of the Supreme Lord, the brähmaëas, the spiritual master, and
superiors like the father and mother, and in cleanliness, simplicity, celibacy and nonviolence.” [BG
17.14]

anudvega-karaà väkyaà satyaà priya-hitaà ca yat

svädhyäyäbhyasanaà caiva väì-mayaà tapa ucyate

“Austerity of speech consists in speaking words that are truthful, pleasing, beneficial, and not agitating
to others, and also in regularly reciting Vedic literature.” [BG17.15]

manaù-prasädaù saumyatvaà maunam ätma-vinigrahaù

bhäva-saàçuddhir ity etat tapo mänasam ucyate

“And satisfaction, simplicity, gravity, self-control and purification of one's existence are the austerities of
the mind.” [BG 17.16]

• We should behave in an exemplary way to bring good reputation to Guru and Srila Prabhupada.
(eg) eagerness to serve other devotees, refusing to accept credit for oneself,
respecting all living entities, non-envious etc.

ACTIVITY : Brainstorm : “What differences did you find in the behaviour of normal hostel boys and the
devotee boys who are practicing KC?”

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2. ACT IN MODE OF GOODNESS
• Activities in mode of goodness facilitates Krsna consciousness and is a stepping stone to transcendental
plane. In the B.G. (6.24 purport), quoting from verse 3 of the Upadesamrta, Srila Prabhupada says that
one of the items favourable for development of devotional service as, "by engaging completely in
activities of goodness."
• The mode of goodness is conducive to self-realization, whereas ignorance and passion are not.
Therefore, how one applies the principles of Vaisnava etiquette reflects whether a devotee is Krsna
conscious or not: ie., Is he humble? conscientious? well-mannered? disciplined? cultured? ...sensitive?
Someone who is actually a devotee will be known by how much he displays the good qualities.
(eg) avoid slamming doors, stealing, calling names etc.
(eg) Due to anger on Ramba, Vishwamitra lost all his tapobalam or merits of asceticism.
(eg) Durvasa got into trouble by showing disproportionate anger on king Ambarish.

A Devotee is a Gentleman
When a television interviewer asked Çréla Prabhupäda by what behavior one could recognize a true
follower of Kåñëa consciousness, Çréla Prabhupäda replied, “He’d be a perfect gentleman, that’s all.” And
in translation the Bhagavad-gétä verses listing eighteen items of knowledge (Bg. 13.8-12), Çréla Prabhupäda
translates the word amänitvam as, “one should himself become a perfect gentleman and learn to give
proper respect to others.” Although in ordinary usage the word gentleman may refer to a man of wealth
and aristocracy, we use it here to describe a devotee’s high standard of honorable and considerate behavior.
The polite and humble behavior of a devotee can be appreciated even by the nondevotee. A devotee is not
arrogant, boorish, or inconsiderate of others.

In the Çrémad-Bhägavatam (1.5.29), Närada Muni explains that he was favored by the Vaiñëavas because,
“I was gentle in behavior, and all my sins were eradicated in their service.” Commenting on this verse,
Çréla Prabhupäda remarks, “He himself must be plain and gentle to receive the instructions of such a pure
devotee.”

Lord Caitanya Mahaprabhu - Role model for all Vaishnavas

In His own preaching Lord Caitanya Mahäprabhu displayed cool-headed, polite behavior, even when
engaged in debate. (priti-purna vyavahaar & yukti-purna prachaar)
• On one occasion he demonstrated extraordinary humility and tolerance by sitting silently for seven
days while Särvabhauma Bhaööäcärya lectured to Him on Vedänta Sütra. Only when the Bhaööäcärya
inquired of His silence did the Lord begin his opposition to the Mäyäväda interpretation of Vedänta.
• When Lord Caitanya came into the company of Mäyävädé sannyäsés at Benares, He sat down humbly at
the doorway until the chief sannyäsé, Prakäçänanda Sarasvaté, personally came to invite Him inside.
And on subsequent visits to Benares, Lord Caitanya displayed similar gentleness and humility.
• When people came to Çré Caitanya Mahäprabhu to discuss the principles of various scriptures, the
Lord defeated their false conclusions and established the predominance of devotional service to the
Lord. With logic and argument He very politely changed their minds. – Cc. Madhya 25.20
• As a youth Lord Caitanya soundly defeated a Käshméré paëòita in debate. But when Lord Caitanya’s
students began to laugh at the paëòita, Lord Caitanya silenced them and treated His opponent with honor.
Story : Mr.Fugate is not impressed with a gentlemanly devotee
Even if the devotee speaks politely, dresses neatly, and acts with all consideration, he will still be rejected
by many materialistic men. Once in 1968, Çréla Prabhupäda sent a simple brahmacäré to Florida, where a
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Mr. Fugate claimed to be interested in hearing about bhakti-yoga. After the brahmacäré visited, Mr. Fugate
wrote back that he was not impressed with the representative of Kåñëa consciousness. Prabhupäda
responded with compassion and consideration, both for his disciple and for Mr. Fugate. “Anyway,” wrote
Çréla Prabhupäda, “please try to deal with him (Mr. Fugate) softly, because he has got some tendency for
spiritual upliftment. But he is misguided or without any knowledge in the line.” Prabhupäda repeated the
Sanskrit proverb that one should speak only palatable truth. “This is a social convention,” wrote
Prabhupäda, “and is not applicable to a person who is preaching the Absolute Truth. The Absolute Truth
is not dependent on material pleasure or displeasure.”

All things considered, a devotee should try his best to act as a Vaiñëava lady of gentleman and behave
politely, as did Lord Caitanya Mahäprabhu. If in the course of sincerely delivering the Absolute Truth, the
nondevotees regard us as unimpressive, then that will not disturb us. A devotee has to please his spiritual
master and Kåñëa, and then everything is complete, even if the world finds him lacking.

When Çréla Prabhupäda refers to the devotee as a gentleman, he generally means that a devotee
avoids the abominable activities of illicit sex, meat-eating, intoxication, and gambling. The so-called ladies
and gentlemen of the world who dress well and speak with culture yet eat slaughtered animals and engage
in illicit activities are actually more like beasts than humans. For Vaiñëava behavior, the all-important
etiquette is to staunchly follow the regulative principles and the exemplary behavior of the mahäjanas.

PRACTICAL EXAMPLES: Students can be asked to portray the following situations as skits :
• When one takes to KC and comes in the company of other devotees, due to material outlook, he may find
faults in them. This leads to disrespect, impolite speech and rude behaviour that arouses passion.
• Sometimes one gets a desire to show others that, “I am a great devotee. I’ve distributed so many books.”
Such consciousness leads to bragging about oneself, becoming envious of others etc which is not
conducive for devotional service.
• Sometimes due to previous habits, one is unclean in keeping the room, one may be lazy, one may sleep too
much etc.
• One who is loving, kind, appreciative of others services, patient to listen others concerns, humble despite
skills, abilities and accomplishments, lives a life of integrity by keeping his promises, never talks ill of
others behind the back – such good qualities though not spiritual, can be used in Krishna’s service to
attract souls back to Godhead.

ACTIVITY TIME :
Each student can read one of the following themes of Quotes from Srila Prabhupada :

NOT ONLY PREACH, BUT ALSO BEHAVE PROPERLY :

(Cc Antya 102-3) Sanatana Goswami to Haridasa Thakura:
apane acara keha na kare pracara
pracara karena keha na karena acara
"Some behave very well but do not preach the cult of Krsna consciousness, whereas others preach but do
not behave properly."
acara pracara -- namera karaha dui karya
tumi -- sarva guru tumi jagatera arya
"You simultaneously perform both activities in relation to the Holy Name by your personal behavior and
by your preaching. Therefore you are the most advanced devotee in the world."

DON’T FIGHT WITH DEVOTEES : To Patita Uddharan (12/12/74)

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"A devotee is always ideal in behavior. So we all have to cooperate amongst ourselves, otherwise what will
people think if we ourselves fight with one another? A devotee is always ideal in behavior."
VAISNAVA SYMPTOM IS HUMILITY: SP Letter to Gargamuni (2/5/69) "Vaisnava Symptom is Humility"
"Your humble repentance is just like a Vaisnava student, so I thank you very much for this humbleness.
Lord Chaitanya taught us to be humbler that the grass on the street and more tolerant that the tree. so
these symptoms are Vaisnava symptoms.
A DEVOTEE SHOULD NEVER BE PUFFED UP : SP Letter to Janardan (1/21/68)
"So we have to be very careful in understanding Krishna Consciousness. ... To understand Krishna as He
has spoken in the Bhagavad Gita or in other Vedic literatures through the right sources of disciplic
succession, that is our real knowledge. The idea is everyone should try to pace himself as if he doesn't
know anything. His position is secure. But as soon as he says that "I know everything, and I was
previously such and such...," that is actually rascal. So I know that you are trying to know things from
the real source, and you are not puffed up like other fools who think that they know everything. Your
humbleness is very much appreciated by me."
BE TRANSPARENT IN DEALINGS, NO MALPRACTICES :
"Our dealings with others must be very clear." - Letter to Bali Mardan (2/22/70)
ALWAYS TAKE GUIDANCE : SP Letter to Satsvarupa (8/19/69)
"Anyway, do things in good sense, without any disturbance. We have to make progress very soberly, and
I am always at your service whenever required." [Therefore a serious devotee is always ready to take
guidance from superior/other Vaisnavas to understand the proper way of acting.]
NEVER STEAL : SP Letter to Madhavi Lata (10/28/68)
"It is nice that you are doing preaching work there, but you should know that such practices like stealing
are against the principles of Krsna consciousness. I always want that my students should be very ideal in
character and not discredit our society."
"But we should never steal anything like money, food, water, gasoline, etc., just to enhance our service to
Krsna. That is too much dangerous, and if we are caught then all our work is finished. Just like in India
recently, this Balyogi Guru Maharaji was detected by the customs authorities attempting to smuggle some
small items into India. By this one tiny incident his entire effort for preaching - even he is rascal number
one and his preaching is nonsense, even so the example is there - his work is ruined now and he is
practically finished, as the government will not grant him a passport to leave India. So we shall always be
careful to avoid any kind of jeopardizing our high standing in the society by some foolish and small act of
illegal stealing." <Source N/A>

3. Becoming a Vaiñëava Devotee of Kåñëa

Çréla Prabhupäda, being as practical as he is compassionate, has provided a very clear and simple checklist
by which we can assess our progress in Kåñëa consciousness. Please read Bhagavad-gétä Chapter 13, Verses
8-12, summarized in Sri Isopanishad, Mantra 10 purport, NOI Verses 1-4, BG 12.12-20.
All the divine qualities are there in the spirit soul. Therefore as we come closer to our spiritual identity,
these qualities naturally become manifest. Among the 26 qualities of a vaisnava, there is one supreme
jewel quality called, ‘Krishna eka sharanam’ ‘exclusive surrender to Sri Krishna’. This quality is like the
Queen of all qualities. If you give invitation to a Queen to come for a festival, all her thousand assistants
will all come with her. In the same manner, one can be considered a devotee, if he accepts Sri Krishna as
the Supreme Personality of godhead and surrenders to Him by chanting His holy name, following four
regulative principles and studying the scriptures under the guidance of a bonafide vaisnava.

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