Firstly, let's define bro.

Bro- noun- any person, male or female, who has proven

themselves to be an utter ledge.

Now that that's out of the way, let's begin with the official rules of the Jake
Williams bro code.

1. If a bro asks the question ‘Pub?’ the only acceptable response is ‘Pub.’
2. If a bro needs any amount of money less than a tenner, you give the
money, you don't lend it.
3. Any bro may take the last beer without judgement. Any bro may also
take the last slice without judgement. Any bro who takes the last beer
and the last slice can be shot.
4. Bros don't let bros drive drunk nor walk home alone.
5. If a bro says ‘hold my beer’ you must immediately hold the beer and
pay attention to anything and everything that might be about to
happen.
6. The mothers off all bros are automatically off limits to banter.
Exception- recognised ‘yo mama’ jokes and ‘that's not what she said’,
these are understood to not be said with the bros actual mother in
mind.
7. If a bro overreacts to something, does something stupid, or otherwise
makes a twat of him or herself, then they will have the piss taken out
of them. No exceptions.
8. If a bro doesn't ask your opinion, you will give it anyway. That's how
we help our bros improve themselves.
9. A bro is given 120 seconds to tell a story, any longer and you are not
under obligation to listen. Exception- if a bro got into bed with a
celebrity, you will listen to them for a full 72 hours.
10. You only get one chance to recognise a new haircut, and one
opportunity to take the piss out of it.
11. Any dispute between bros may last 48 hours. After that, all bros
involved are expected to drop it.
12. If a bro starts a fight, you are obligated to watch. If a bro does not
start a fight, but gets into one anyway, you are obligated to assist. No
exceptions.
13. If you lend money to a bro, you shouldn't ask them to give it back. If a
bro lends you money, you should give it back without them asking.
Exception- see rule 2
14. When telling a story about a bros great deeds, you will make him or
her sound their best. The 20lbs salmon weighed 30lbs, there wasn't
one guy there were two, they finished the marathon in 3:45.
15. A bro will bail a bro out of jail. A good bro will be sitting in the cell
next to them saying ‘that was fucking awesome!’