7 Habits of Highly Effective People

Introduction

Let me start by stating this is my second time reading the book. It was highly recommended to me by a
person I know and has deep insight in this fields. I believe that this book is one of the best books I’ve
read so far, for personal development and leadership. I learned step by step that all my actions have a
considerable impact to the people I talk and work as a team. Therefore, I always come back and read
certain chapters in order to fully grasp its meanings.

Moreover, to be effective means to do things right the first time. If not, you could revisit every decision
and every result just because you mistake effective with efficient.

Summary

Stephen R. Covey offers in his book insight in such a way, that the reader finds it easier to integrate its
opinion to others and start bringing first a change in itself and after around himself. He offers ( in his
book ) a pyramidical understanding of the 7 habits that determines one’s ascension to success.

The first three (Be Proactive, Begin with the End in Mind and Put First Things First) that helps you move
from being dependent on external input to being independent.

The next three (Think Win-Win, Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood and Synergize)
encourage you in your development by taking the following step to being interdependent.

The last habit (Sharpen the Saw) is about continuous renewal to allows us to increase our ability to
practice each of the above.

In the first chapter of the book, the writer suggests that we all have some specific core values that
shapes our personality and determines how do we proceed in our life (how we think, act and respond).
Based on our values the decisions, actions and thoughts are taken in light of events that occur around us
and given by the knowledge we possess based on our decision making.

In other words, this chapter is an invitation for self-reflection on the way we perceive and approach life,
people, ourselves. After we understand how we are wrong, the 7 habits come at our disposal, one by
one, to be used.
The next chapter is the first habit: Be proactive

In this Chapter, the author talks for the first time about the scale of dependency. As a
consequence, he explains in detail that the main problem is to be dependent of others especially
emotional which drives our decision factors. To overcome this is to become independent, to be self-
reeling. By becoming independent you express your reality to others. Furthermore people are meant to
work together. That’s why the next step is to be Inter - dependent.

But the main point at this chapter is about being reactive vs being proactive. Reactive is a way of
saying “I give up; I can’t do it; “, to find excuses, to put the blame on others. That’s why Stephen R.
Covey offers an alternative. His alternative is to approach with a proactive mentality. To he Honest, to
work with the core values of every individual, to approach problem with an open mind and out of the
box mentality (finding solutions to every problem encountered).

The following habit is: Begin with the End in Mind.

Reaching this chapter, the writer offers deep understanding on how to envision our life. He
explains that we should start with our end goal in mind. This is done by find our inner values, principles
and expressing them to others. Also, he admits that there are 2 type of situation in life. First one is to be
our own leader and convince others to follow in our foot step. The second one is exactly the opposite.
As a result, we are a creation of other people agendas. Only if you are centered on principles you will
have stability on long term.

The third habit is: Put First Things First.

As Covey said: “The challenge is not to manage time, but to manage ourselves”. , if you want to
be most efficient, you have to spend the most time on Important and non-urgent activities. The second
main point made in this chapter is about the importance of delegation. The author said: ”Delegation
means growth, both for individuals and for organizations”.

The fourth habit is: Think Win-Win: That means creating situations that are mutually beneficial and
satisfying to each party. In this way we can establish effective interdependent relationships, which will
have long term benefits, compared to a win-lose mindset that affects your integrity.

The fifth habit: Seek First to Understand, Then to Be Understood: In this chapter, it is described the way
we approach everyday talks. Most of the people listen mainly just to give a response, not to truly
understand the interlocutor. The solution is made possible through emphatic listening. Ask questions, be
truly engaged to a conversation, diagnose the problem and just after that think about a solution. Don’t
try to anticipate.

The sixth habit: Synergize: It is imperative that one practice the previous two habits in order to achieve
synergy. That translates to "When one plus one equals three or more and the whole is great than the
sum of its parts." as the writer said. Synergy is a balance between cooperation and trust that produce
new alternatives and open new possibilities by thinking to a third solution, one that is not belonging to a
person or another, but both.
The seventh habit: Sharpen the Saw: This last habit is for allowing a person to give his best for long
term. I would describe it as maintaining yourself “fit” in four different categories: Mentally, Physically,
Spiritually and Socially. To learn everyday more, to keep your body healthy, to maintain your interior
balance and to nourish meaningful relationships.

Comparing and contradicting

By learning new ways to approach a situation, this book offered me a good understanding on
how people work and interact with each other. This led me to remember a few other books that I’ve
read. Those books are:

 Leaders Eat Last – by Simon Sinek

 Attitude Is Everything – by Jeff Keller
 The power of questions – By Andrew Sobel.

The author offers a good understanding through his perception of life. This book strength is its
structure. (Ideas, paragraphs, chapters). By doing so, he offers clarity and defines his concepts; gives
relevant examples that are easy to follow, and as a treat, at the end of every chapter presents ways of
implementing the knowledge. In comparison, the book of Simon Sinek goes through a lot of concepts
that are similar, for self and public leadership, but it is hard to follow. There are too many examples and
the main ideas are lost in useless details.

I consider that Stephen R. Covey book is well refined and pragmatical in such a way that I could
still remember his lessons even after a year. Not only that but also, I could apply his teaching in real life
environment. Furthermore, I believe that a book is as good as it provides you with a clear taste of
reality, being pragmatical and giving you a perception of augmented pragmatism. This way I can envision
action and reaction of people by carefully choosing my words for the expected effect. The other two
books show the same strength: they are short and powerful, but describe just one or two points detailed
in 7 Habits.

The book “Attitude is everything” describes better what being proactive means, as it is organized
in 10 lessons that are meant to change your whole way of thinking. I believe this author approach is
better than Covey’s regarding mindset, as it makes easier to implement positive thinking through his
examples. Also, another thing that this book has and in Covey’s is lacking is the explaining the
importance of visualization. Here it is also put emphasis on changing the way we perceived past events
and reflect on them, so we can face better similar events and get free of our insecurities. The
information here has what the other one lack.

When it comes to the last book, the power of questions, you as a reader are given the tools for
emphatic listening. This book answer in a proper manner the question of “HOW”. How to understand a
person better, how to nourish better relationships, how to get at the core of the problem.
 Stephen R. Covey book just gives you the “WHAT”; what you should do when speaking to
someone, following with examples to see the differences of approach.

Overall by comparing this book with the above mentioned, I have to say that it covers a wide range of
real-life occasions. Every conversation is an occasion to improve and I feel that, Stephen R. Covey
motivated me for future development in this particular field of expertise. The other books have more
detailed explanation but I found it hard for me to apply them due to the complexity of information
given; making it hard to apply all of their thinking.

Findings

In the beginning, when I read the book “7 habits of highly effective people “, I did not know
what to expect. I was developing my managerial skills and also my leadership feats. It was
recommended to me by a friend. By reading it, I got a taste of how to be more adaptive and find
solution. Overall, I believe it suits its name as in outmatch my expectation.

For instance, one should not try to adapt himself to please other’s needs, because he will lose
his authenticity and will get the contrary response (emotional dependence). By acting based on your
core values and beliefs, everything will find its course. (interdependent and independent approach).

The second lesson learned is about the Product and Capacity of production principle. You can apply this
in every area of your life, but I find most fulfilling to think about yourself as the most important CP, in
whom to invest constantly. And for this you have to invest in quadrant II type activities and to constantly
use the seventh habit. Regarding the latter, there is a quote from the book that reflects best this idea.
Martin Luther is quoted as saying, "I have so much to do today, I'll need to spend another hour on my
knees." To him, prayer was not a mechanical duty but rather a source of power in releasing and
multiplying his energies”. So, in order to be productive, you have to reserve time for these activities,
that are often neglected

The third insight I got is that I can communicate better with people whom I interact if I have a
good understanding on the centers of interests that drives each one's beliefs and actions. Using
emphatic listening, I can determine their values, and according to them to think the way i should
approach them for a win-win situation.

Your opinion

I have to admit that is a lot easier to understand a concept then to apply it. This book made me
more aware on how every word, action, situation, empathy, intuition, culture, etc. affects the end result
according to my interest in the long term. Moreover, the author Stephen R. Covey enlighten me on how
to apply it and I see the result by being proactive in life. I gain more insight on how to be self-reliance
and interdependent, both private and in public life.

For example, by the first chapter of the book, I could reflect on some actions of mine and take
different course of action, if the situation repeated itself. This way I found a way out in the loop I was in.
What I mean is, sometimes we repeat the same mistakes, and now I am searching actively not to repeat
the end result that was given to me by others. What I intend to say is that, I can safely make right
decisions so I won’t end up in an inconvenient or frustrating situation.

Application of knowledge

The first time when I read the book, I felt like I was slapped over the face, because I saw for the
first time how many aspects of myself I had to work on. I realized that I was not spending time on the
second quadrant and I figured it out why I wasn’t efficient. I became aware that we all have some
centers of interest that shapes our values, but I couldn’t figure it out by first place what was for myself.
Due to some events I realized that I was centered on friends, and after reading the book for the second
time I really start to move to principle-centered.

Also, one mistake I have made that I can see a year later, throughout a second reading, is that I
focused too much on the habits for social success, neglecting personal success; being independent.

I established the skills for active listening, make win-win situations, nourishing the relationships
with close ones. But by the moment I changed my environment at the “learning journey”, I wasn’t
receiving validation, acceptance and trust from others. For a short period of time, I was falling apart.
This is due in light of my character that got used to be emotionally dependent of others. As dazzling as it
got, a shock wave of ideas started to emerge based on the practice of 7 habits. I’ve spent a lot of time
renewing myself (first spiritually, then physically and last, socially). In this way, I gained again control
over myself. But what surprised me is that I didn’t even realized that I knew this from the book. I just
knew I had to do it. And only by reading the second time I saw that I was using that principle
unconsciously.

Conclusion

In conclusion I have to say that Stephen R. Covey book is well balanced and result centered. All
of his ideas, based on real life experience, makes it a must read for all people as it pivots socially to a
new era of inter human understanding. By his book he puts a pillar in our ever developing society,
marking peoples life’s with his wisdom and judgement.