Journal of Disability & Religion

ISSN: 2331-2521 (Print) 2331-253X (Online) Journal homepage: https://www.tandfonline.com/loi/wrdh21

We-Thou Communion

Christine Bryden

To cite this article: Christine Bryden (2019): We-Thou Communion, Journal of Disability &
Religion, DOI: 10.1080/23312521.2019.1613944

To link to this article: https://doi.org/10.1080/23312521.2019.1613944

Published online: 31 May 2019.

Submit your article to this journal

Article views: 13

View related articles

View Crossmark data

Full Terms & Conditions of access and use can be found at

https://www.tandfonline.com/action/journalInformation?journalCode=wrdh21
JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION
https://doi.org/10.1080/23312521.2019.1613944

We-Thou Communion
Christine Bryden
Public and Contextual Theology, Charles Sturt University Saint Mark’s National Theological
Centre, Barton, Australia

ABSTRACT KEYWORDS
The author proposes a communal model for the church, Church; communal identity;
We-Thou Communion, to improve inclusivity, particularly for dementia; we-thou
people with dementia. Written from the subjective viewpoint communion; worship
of a person living with dementia, it provides a unique insider’s
perspective of the church as a place of welcome and support.
We all share vulnerability before God, despite our varying cog-
nitive, emotional, and physical capacities, yet this is seldom
recognized in today’s society, which values autonomy and
independence. We-Thou Communion can provide a way for
the faith community to better welcome, support, and include
all people despite their limitations. The focus of this article is
on people with dementia.

Introduction
The church, as the Body of Christ on earth, should be an inclusive faith
community, able to support and welcome people with a range of disabil-
ities, particularly dementia. It seems that the church is better able to wel-
come people with physical disabilities, whereas those with cognitive
difficulties can to be regarded as incomprehensible, embarrassing, and odd.
People with dementia can thus become marginalized, isolated in all of the
church’s activities, as they become increasingly less able to communicate
and function.
I argue that a communal approach, with the suggested terminology of
We-Thou Communion, would enable the church to welcome people with
cognitive disabilities, contrasting with the emphasis in some churches on
the individual, and on his or her personal relationship with others and
with God.
Jewish theologian, Buber (1970), in his treatise I-Thou, explored relation-
ships between people—between the individual “I” and the “Thou” (or You)
of the other person. Unfortunately, the use of the term Thou has been
often misunderstood to mean God, and this work to refer to the

CONTACT Christine Bryden pcbryden@aapt.net.au Public and Contextual Theology, Charles Sturt
University Saint Mark’s National Theological Centre, 15 Blackall Street, Barton, 2600, Australia.
ß 2019 Taylor & Francis Group, LLC
2 C. BRYDEN

relationship between a person and God, rather than between individuals.1

However, even if all interpersonal relationships within the church are in
accord with Buber’s ideas, people with dementia may still be excluded, due
to their difficulties in communicating with others. A more inclusive
approach is needed, in which we gather together as We, including all mem-
bers of the faith community in a communal relationship with the Thou
of God.
Including people with dementia in a communal relationship, with others
and with God, counters the tendency for them to be regarded as falling
outside of the functional norms of society, in which the measure of a per-
son is her or his ability to communicate, relate, achieve, and contribute.
The concept of We-Thou Communion provides a more inclusive view of
what it means to be human, where cognitive functioning is not a defining
category, and we are all vulnerable human beings, not human doings.
Ethicist Hans Reinders (2008) suggested that if we interpret humanity from
such a theological perspective, people with dementia can then be regarded
as the rule of what it means to be human, not the exception.
Within We-Thou Communion, all people are included as vulnerable and
equal recipients of divine love and grace, despite varying cognitive capaci-
ties. People with dementia are included in all of the church’s activities, as
part of shared worship and in receiving improved welcome, pastoral care
and ministry. This proposal reflects the approach of ancient Hebraic com-
munities, in which there was a communal identity of the people in worship
before God. Importantly, it draws on the work of Christian theologian
Dietrich Bonhoeffer (2009)2 to develop a concept of the faith community
being a communal and inclusive gathering before God.
Since my diagnosis in 1995, I have examined the lived experience of
dementia, publishing books, chapters and articles (Bryden, 2002, 2005,
2012, 2015a, 2015b, 2016, 2018a, 2018b, 2019a, 2019b; Bryden &
MacKinlay, 2002, 2008). My focus in this article is on how the church can
welcome, include and support people with dementia in all of its activities.
Written from the subjective viewpoint of a person living with dementia,
the article provides a unique insider’s reflection on the church as a com-
munity of people who share vulnerability before God, despite their cogni-
tive differences.

Shared vulnerability before God

In contrast with God, all humans are vulnerable and weak, unknowing and
dependent: “For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways
my ways, declares the Lord” (Isaiah 55:8). Indeed, when we consider cre-
ation and God’s revelation in scripture, who are we that God is mindful of
 JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION 3

us? (see Psalms 8:4 and Psalm 144:3). However, within today’s
“hypercognitive culture” (Post, 1995, p. 5), humans are defined as having
purposive agency, rationality, self-awareness, and other so-called advanced
faculties. There is a disregard for our common dependence on God: the
measure of humanity is an ability to contribute, to relate to others, and
to achieve.
Unfortunately, cognitive measures of humanity can present difficulties
for people with dementia. Indeed, theologian, Vanier (2003), asked: “If
someone cannot live according to the values of knowledge and power …
can that person be fully human?” (p. 77). This is a very real issue for peo-
ple with disabilities such as dementia in today’s society; yet, the church
should have a very different view of what it means to be human, focused
on a collective relationship as a people before God.
The collective identity that once characterized ancient people is no longer
evident. Individuality is rarely seen in the Old Testament, where well-defined
personal boundaries were less important than living in community: “Hebrew
men and women experienced personal identity as they lived in community
with other persons … worship acceptable on God’s sight was worship which
emanated from the collective life of the people” (Weaver, 1986, p. 447). As
biblical scholar Green (1998) points out, in these ancient texts “human
beings cannot be understood in their individuality” (p. 158); even those who
play a prominent role remain embedded within the people of God.
Early Christian views began to differ from this experience of collective
identity. Theologian Grenz (2006) traces how the concept of individuality
arose in Christian thought, commencing with St. Augustine looking for an
inner self. Ideas of the individual self-sufficient person are now embedded
within the secular idea of the supremacy of humankind, with no consider-
ation of our common dependence on the divine. Unfortunately, the need
to be an autonomous individual, rather than being embedded within com-
munity, can present particular difficulties for people with dementia. A com-
munal model for the church is needed, so that it can become more
inclusive in all of its activities.
People with dementia augment the church, introducing “a communal
heterogeneity and diversity” (Reynolds, 2012, p. 44). Like all people, they
join in a common vulnerability before God, both as part of humanity and
more particularly within the faith community. Despite humanity’s many
limitations, God gave the divine presence in Christ Jesus to all of us: the
weak, as well as the strong; and the cognitively abled, as well as those
struggling with dementia. All humanity lives within “a basic web of mutual
dependence” (Reynolds, 2012, p. 39), where to “be truly human is to be …
vulnerable, limited, even weak, before God and others” (Antus, 2013,
p. 258).
4 C. BRYDEN

Within the church, we have “been given fullness in Christ” (Colossians

2:10), where the “strong” do not have their abilities for themselves, but have
them for the common good (1 Cor 12:7). This goes to the heart of the need
for a communal model for the church: the strong have abilities so that they
can include those who are weak in church-community; people with disabil-
ities such as dementia can be upheld by the strength and love of others.

Collective identity
By rediscovering the merits of communal identity, the church can model
aspects of early Hebraic concepts of interdependence and communion before
God. A focus on shared vulnerability, and on relationships to God and with
others, can provide improved inclusivity for people with dementia in par-
ticular. It is important that all people are defined from the perspective of
their shared vulnerability before God, otherwise there is always the risk that
at some stage, people with dementia might pass a milestone at which they
are no longer considered to be human. This may seem ridiculous but is the
logical consequence of current views of people with dementia. How can their
humanity be in doubt, and be lost at some stage?
The collective identity seen among ancient Hebraic people would have
great merit for pastoral care and ministry, particularly to people with
dementia. By moving away from individuality and a modern focus on cog-
nition, toward becoming a communal gathering before God, the faith com-
munity can rediscover a common vulnerability before God, which includes
all people, despite their limitations and differences. Becoming a communal
gathering before God encourages the church to focus on relationships,
rather than on individuality. People with dementia can be upheld within
the body of Christ, as we gather together in communion to reflect on what
God has done, deepen our faith, as well as our trust in God.
In exploring how we can embrace communal identity within the church,
Grenz (2006) emphasizes the importance of each one of us belonging as
ecclesial selves, in which we participate in the Body of Christ through the
work of the Holy Spirit. Reinders (2008) similarly points to the way we are
all ecclesial beings, drawn into the communion of the Father, Son, and
Holy Spirit. People with dementia belong as equals within this gathering of
Christ’s supportive and inclusive ecclesial community. In the inclusive
Body of Christ, people with dementia participate just as much as others,
even though increasingly they may be less able to contribute to all of the
church’s activities. As Mercer (2017) points out, even those with frail minds
and bodies are called to serve, both as care giver and care receiver.
The Eastern Orthodox theologian John D. Zizioulas emphasizes the
importance of the church being a communal gathering, and contests the
 JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION 5

concept of individualism. “Being a person is basically different from being

an individual … in that a person cannot be conceived in itself as a static
entity, but only as it relates to” and individuality is a perversion (Zizioulas,
1975, pp. 407–441). Zizioulas argues that a person is both integrated and
undivided, in movement toward communion, where this “does not threaten
personal particularity; it is constitutive of it” (p. 409). In these writings,
relational interdependence is a fundamental characteristic of humanity, and
thus particularly of the church.
The faith community, since the times of the early Hebrews up until now,
has been built on relationships, with God and with each other, moved by
the power of the Holy Spirit. “As persons in relation, we are called … into
community where the weak and the strong, the insightful and the forgetful
flourish together” (Hudson, 2016, p. 65). We are called into “oneness” and
in “this communion we discover the deepest part of our being” (Vanier,
2003, p. 89). We learn to care for one another in a way “that respects the
body that is storied by Christ” (Hauerwas, 2014, p. 191). We are called to
be with each other. This is central to the writings of Wells (2015), where
“being with is a vibrant, dynamic, demanding activity” (p. 127). Wells
(2017) points to the need to enter into the mystery of others and to be
truly present, proclaiming a person as a “fellow member of the body of
Christ” (p. 189), offering “real, sustained, wholehearted attention” (p. 193).
We are to enjoy each other in the way God enjoys us.
How can the Body of Christ better support, include, enjoy, and welcome
people with dementia in all of its activities? The proposed We-Thou
Communion suggests that the church can become a place of welcome and inclu-
sivity for all people, despite their cognitive, physical, and emotional differences.

Communal interdependence
Communal interdependence within the church is fundamental to welcom-
ing and including people with dementia. A number of theologians have
stressed the importance of how Christianity is communal. For example,
Laytham (2004) emphasizes that “God’s economy is neither personal nor
private” (p. 19). The reality of the church is that we share in worship
(Hauerwas, 2014) and gather around the Eucharist, as a baptism commu-
nity in which “we know and are known” (Clapp, 2004, p. 36). The
Christian body is meant to glorify God, caring for each other as part of the
baptized body in the people of God (Hauerwas, 2014). Theologian Peter
Kevern also emphasizes the role of communities, in supporting all people,
including those with dementia. He writes, “we do not hold our identities as
individuals, but as members of communities” (Kevern, 2012, p. 48).
Identity is held in community, where “grace is essentially shared and
6 C. BRYDEN

corporate” (Kevern, 2012, p. 49) and we all reflect the likeness of God
[deleted phrase].
In contrast to a focus on personal relationships with God, the Body of
Christ should be social in character, where the image of God lies in the
relationality of many different humans in community. “To be a person is
to find through others the possibility of a life that can be storied”
(Hauerwas, 2014, p. 229; my emphasis). Communal interdependence enfolds
us all, as equals before God. Diminishing cognitive abilities do not deny
people with dementia participation; they remain always able to receive and
respond in a community of love. “As persons in relation, we are called …
into community where the weak and the strong, the insightful and the for-
getful flourish together” (Hudson, 2016, p. 65; my emphasis).
The ancient origins of our interdependence, with each other and before
God, can be read in Genesis 1:26: “Let us make humankind in our image.”
In creating woman as man’s companion, there is recognition of sameness
and difference in the embodiment of humanity, and of interdependence.
This interdependence within the church is a way in which the faith com-
munity can become more inclusive of people with dementia.
The Christian origins of communal interdependence can be seen in the
Lord’s Prayer, which teaches us to pray communally:
This, then, is how you should pray: Our Father in heaven … give us this day our
daily bread … forgive us our debts … as we also have forgiven our debtors … and
do not bring us … but rescue us (Matt 6:9–13; my emphasis).

Similarly, they are found in the Nicene Creed:

We believe in one God, …

We believe in one Lord, Jesus Christ, …

For us and for our salvation, …

For our sake …

We believe in the Holy Spirit, the Lord, the giver of life, …

We believe in one holy catholic and apostolic Church.

We acknowledge one baptism for the forgiveness of sins.

We look for the resurrection of the dead, and the life of the world to come
(Anglican Church of Australia, 1995, pp. 103–104; my emphasis).

Little children, as well as people with dementia, are included in this

prayer and communal statement of belief. It seems obvious that children
should not be excluded, for at what stage are they not yet human; similarly,
 JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION 7

people with dementia should not be excluded, for at what stage are they no
longer human? We all celebrate wholeness in the Body of Christ, sharing
the joy of Jesus’ incarnation and resurrection, where we all become a new
creation (Hudson, 2016, p. 62). In We-Thou Communion, the church can
become a place of welcome and inclusivity.
People with dementia can witness to a different way of living, outside a
world of “speed and placelessness” (Hauerwas & Vanier, 2008, p. 48).
Mercer (2017) writes of the vocation of those with dementia as being to
offer the gift of time to people who need to slow down. Others write of
becoming “friends of time” to be with the person in the present moment
(Swinton, 2012; Hauerwas & Vanier, 2008).
With patience and the faithfulness of the Gospel (Hauerwas & Vanier,
2008), the church can accept people with dementia, recognizing that they
are indispensable to We-Thou Communion. Importantly, an hospitable lit-
urgy3 enables the church to offer welcome to people with dementia, by
entering “imaginatively and compassionately into a world in which there
are others – strangers – who would otherwise be too strange, too foreign,
too different to dance with” (McCall, 2000, p. 27).

A community of love
People with dementia increasingly rely on others to be their memory, to
prompt their recollections, and to talk about shared experiences, as well
as to embody a life in symbols, signs, singing, and metaphors. Within a
faith community centered on love, people with dementia can receive the
support they need: “As Christians, we are one Body in Christ. If this is
so in reality, then it doesn’t matter whether people can carry relevant
memories themselves, but it does matter that other members of the body
can carry those memories within a loving community” (MacKinlay,
2016, p. 35).
We have been called to love one another: “Beloved, let us love one
another, because love is from God; everyone who loves is born of God
and knows God” (1 John 4:7). Christ calls us to: “Love your neighbour
as yourself” (Mark 12:31). This call to love is not for one or a few cate-
gories of human being, but all humanity. However, how can the church
community be forced to love people with dementia, unless it is through
the guidance of the Holy Spirit to see them as God sees them? As a per-
son living with dementia, I have experienced difficulties in being part of
relationships based on love. My circle of friends became much smaller
after my diagnosis with dementia: perhaps they feared that I might no
longer behave in socially accepted ways? Now, I may forget my friends
exist, or what is happening in their lives, so I have become more
8 C. BRYDEN

dependent on them to remember me, to be my friend, and to accept my

limitations. I seek to receive the gift of friendship, in which we are all
seen as God sees us.
Seeing people with Godly eyes is to see a person who is a witness to
what it means to be human: simply to “be,” rather than striving to “author”
one’s own life. God bestows value on us all, and we are each a dependent
human being before God; given God’s grace, not by what we achieve or do,
or have the potential to do, but rather, by our existence as part of the full-
ness and diversity of creation. People with dementia can be regarded as
icons of God’s glory, “with whom God is pleased to dwell” (Hudson, 2016,
p. 53), and can be welcomed in We-Thou Communion, where we all see
one another as God sees us. Hudson writes, it is “the theological under-
standing of person that allows us to truly see the person with dementia
face to face” (Hudson, 2016, p. 53), and God’s image is indestructible, even
in advanced dementia.
The value of people with dementia continues to be determined in God’s
loving eyes, regardless of declining cognitive capacities. The church com-
munion needs to value people with dementia in love: to continue to sit
with then in the pews, [not altered, as there is a need to overcome their
isolation] to talk with them after the service, to visit them in fellowship
during the week, and to seek ways to support people with dementia and
their families (e.g., providing a quiet space during worship and educational
talks from relevant providers).
Vanier (2003) writes of loving relationships within the church commu-
nity, where we allow each other to grow, to change, and to “become more
fully human” (p. 88). “Jesus came to lead us all into a society that is a
body, where each part, weak or strong, able or disabled, finds its place and
is free … This vision for humanity … comes from the God of love, who
wants to change our hearts of stone into hearts of flesh” (Vanier, 2003, p.
133). People with dementia are an integral part of the Body of Christ, and
seek to be accepted and welcomed in love.
Bonhoeffer points out that the church is a community of love in two
important and interdependent ways: being with each other and being for
each other. Both are important for welcoming people with dementia.
“Now where the church community is, there is Christ … where the
church-community is, there is God’s will and purpose, there is commu-
nity with God” (Bonhoeffer, 2009, p. 182). We all stand together in the
name of Christ, within the spiritual reality of the church, as a commu-
nity of faith, love, and spirit, where the heart is a “powerhouse of love
that can reorient us from our self-centredness, revealing to us and to
others the basic beauty of humanity, empowering us to grow” (Vanier,
2003, pp. 77–78).
 JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION 9

Becoming a welcoming and inclusive community

The church is Christ to me, and can offer love, belonging, welcome, and
hospitality, throughout my lived experience of dementia. Instead of soci-
ety’s perception of my diminishing capacity, the Body of Christ holds me
in grace to the loving Father, through the Son, by the power of the Holy
Spirit. Within this fellowship emphasizing equality, others choose to be
with me in my present embodied moment (choice needs emphasis, as peo-
ple with dementia are often shunned). Importantly, Reinders (2008) writes
of a need to be chosen as a friend, and to belong. By bringing love in the
moment, the Gospel counter-story of being held within the Body of Christ
provides me with a narrative of meaning in life. where “it is the experience
of Christ’s love that you bring us, not a memory of an event” (Bryden,
2015b, p. 288).
Society’s views of people with dementia often result in isolation; the
church should be very different, and be a loving, welcoming and supportive
We-Thou Communion. In the faith community, people with dementia will
always remain recipients of God’s love, despite their decreasing capacity.
We all belong in Christ’s ecclesial community, based on our shared vulner-
abilities before God, where the imagery of the vine and the branches in the
Gospel of John (15:5) provides a good metaphor for people with dementia
belonging equally within the church, with Christ as the head. People with
dementia are an integral part of this vine, and together we are all rooted in
Christ, so that we can each bear fruit.
Including people with dementia in the metaphorical vine of church com-
munity should not be mere tolerance, but a welcome with delight. People
with dementia seek to belong, and be welcomed in loving friendship, and
missed when they have not been to church for a while (Swinton, 2012, p.
279). They seek a joyful welcome that expresses the concept: “It’s good that
you exist; it’s good that you are in this world!” (Kinghorn, 2016, p. 112).
Within We-Thou Communion, the faith community can offer welcome
and inclusion, following the example set by Jesus in his openness to chil-
dren, women, and Samaritans, as well as in his teaching of how we are to
recognize his presence in all people: “I was a stranger and you welcomed
me” (Matt 25:35). As people with dementia become less familiar to others
in their changing behavior (seemingly becoming a stranger), they will still
be loved as a fully human being: by God, in Christ, and through the Holy
Spirit. In the church community, we are all part of a shared human crea-
tureliness before God, contingent upon divine love. “There is neither cogni-
tively abled or disabled, Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for
you are all one in Christ Jesus” (paraphrasing Gal 3:28; my emphasis).
The sacraments can represent a loving welcome, even to those who can-
not communicate. For example, in baptism the church carries the child like
10 C. BRYDEN

a mother, as a sacred treasure, and does this by virtue of its communal life
(Bonhoeffer, 2009). Sacramental acts of unity allow people with dementia
to be upheld in love within the church community, where God’s word
becomes the “bearer of the social activity of the Holy Spirit” (Bonhoeffer,
2009, p. 233). Hospitality to people with dementia in other sacraments,
such as the Eucharist, is particularly important: the Lord’s Supper “is
Christ’s gift that one member is able to bear the other and to be borne by
the other” (Bonhoeffer, 2009, p. 243).
However, people with dementia do not always meet the expectations of
the church community of polite behavior. For example, “the etiquette of the
Spirit was always breaking the teacups of polite convention” (Koenig, 1985,
p. 62; my emphasis): in the Eucharistic meal, people with dementia might
break the metaphorical tea service. Despite this, in their strange land of
confusion, anxiety and forgetfulness, people with dementia need to be wel-
comed in fellowship, where they do not need to show reasonable or pre-
dictable behavior. There is power in weakness (2 Cor 12:10): “Human
freedom … abolishes the scheme ‘capacity versus incapacity’ and replaces
it with the paradox of ‘capacity in incapacity’” (Zizioulas, 1975, p. 430).
The church can offer love, belonging, welcome and hospitality, through-
out the lived experience of dementia. God bestows value upon us all, and
no one can claim to be other than a receiver of divine love and grace. We
all have a common dependency and vulnerability before God, including
people with dementia: we do not earn our value before God by what we
do. We are all part of the fullness and diversity of creation. As I gradually
lose the capacity for self-reflection, I hope to be more open to the grace of
God flowing freely to me and through me. My decline is part of a short
temporal life, toward bodily resurrection into eternal life. I will retain the
undeserved gift of the fullness of temporal and eternal life in Christ, which
does not depend on my abilities. This promise is given to us all, including
people with dementia. We are all held in love within the church and have
“been given fullness in Christ” (Col 2:10).
If we need full cognitive capacity to respond to God’s love, then
“Christ died for nothing” (Gal 2:21; my emphasis). Cognition is not
required for people with dementia to receive the divine gift of love, and
their diminishing abilities do not deny them full participation within
We-Thou Communion. Nothing can separate any one of us from the
love of Christ: neither death nor life, nor cognitive impairment, nor any-
thing else in creation (Rom 8:35–38; my paraphrase). God’s uncondi-
tional love toward people with dementia will be steadfast at all stages of
their decline, even to death. In the church community, we can “sit with
one another in the valley of the shadow of death (Hauerwas, 2014,
p. 188).
 JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION 11

We-Thou Communion
In developing the concept of We-Thou Communion as a model for the
church to become fully inclusive of people with dementia, I have examined
Buber’s (1970, p. 54) discussion of I-Thou, which is an extensive explor-
ation of the nature of individual relationships between people. However,
focusing on individual relationships is inadequate as a model for better
including people with dementia in the church, as even if all relationships
within the congregation were I-Thou, people with dementia and other dis-
abilities may still be excluded, due to their declining ability to relate
to others.
People with dementia are better supported by communal inclusion
within their faith community, where the Holy Spirit prompts a social
model for relationships. Therefore the work of Bonhoeffer is particularly
valuable. He considered that we are only conceivable in sociality
(Bonhoeffer, 2009), reflecting the Hebraic experience of identity, where
God’s covenant was with the people as a whole, not with each individual.
He writes of the Holy Spirit’s role in bringing together the church commu-
nity, in which we are all reconciled to God in Christ (Bonhoeffer, 2009).
Importantly, Bonhoeffer makes a distinction between “community” (e.g.,
church and family), where bonds between people have developed naturally
and through love, and “society” (e.g., club, corporation), where bonds have
been willed through areas of common interest (Bonhoeffer, 2009). In the
church we belong to a community with bonds that are based on love and
trust, which can and should include children and people with dementia;
this is not true for society as a whole. People with dementia can rely on
these bonds of love within We-Thou Communion, where “surrendering
myself to what God wills for my neighbour really leads to the community
of the sanctorum communio established by God” (Bonhoeffer, 2009, p. 176).
Community with God and with each other, gathered together as equals in
the power of the Holy Spirit, lies at the heart of We-Thou Communion.

Discussion
In the present article, I argue that the church should have a more inclusive
view of what it means to be human, where cognitive functioning is not a
defining category, and we are all vulnerable human beings, not human
doings. The faith community would then be more inclusive, better able to
welcome and support people with cognitive, emotional, and physical limita-
tions, particularly dementia. The collective identity that once characterized
ancient people should thus become the focus for the church today.
The rationale for a communal model for the church is based on our
shared vulnerability before God, which is very seldom recognized in today’s
12 C. BRYDEN

modern society, where the measure of humanity is an ability to contribute,

relate to others, and achieve. With such cognitive measures of what it
means to be human, there is a risk that, at some stage, people with demen-
tia might pass a milestone at which they are no longer considered to be a
person; the logical consequence of current views of people with dementia.
How can their humanity be in doubt, and be lost at some stage?
However, people with dementia augment the church, and join with all
members of the faith community in a common vulnerability before God,
both as part of humanity and more particularly within the faith commu-
nity. In the proposed communal model for the church, people with demen-
tia belong as equals within We-Thou Communion. In this gathering of
Christ’s supportive and inclusive ecclesial community, we all participate,
even though increasingly some may be less able to contribute to all of the
church’s activities. We all belong to a community with bonds that are
based on love and trust. This can and should include children and people
with dementia, as well as others with cognitive, physical, or emotional limi-
tations, which is not true for society as a whole. In We-Thou Communion,
the focus is on relationships with God and with others, which improves
inclusivity for people with dementia.
Communal interdependence in the Body of Christ should enfold us all,
as equals before God. Diminishing cognitive abilities should not deny peo-
ple with dementia participation; although they might not be able to take an
active part in all the activities of the church, they remain always able to
receive and respond in a community of love. The origins of communal
Christianity are seen in the collective pronouns of the Lord’s Prayer, as
well as the Nicene Creed. Little children, as well as people with dementia,
are included in this prayer and communal statement of belief. It seems
obvious that children should not be excluded, for at what stage are they
not yet human; but people with dementia are also included, for at what
stage are they no longer human?
Each one of us is dependent upon God, blessed with divine love and
grace, not by what we achieve or do, or have the potential to do, but by
our existence as part of the fullness and diversity of creation. In We-Thou
Communion, the church can value people with dementia in this Godly
way, and continue to sit with them in the pews, talk with them after the
service, and visit them in fellowship during the week. People with dementia
need to be engaged in meaningful conversation with others, in which they
are listened to with respect and in love. They can flourish in this true com-
munion with others, where there is recognition of the shared vulnerability
of all humanity before God.
We all belong in Christ’s ecclesial community, where the imagery of the
vine and the branches in the Gospel of John (15:5) provides a good
 JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION 13

metaphor for people with dementia belonging within the church, with
Christ as the head. As people with dementia become increasingly cogni-
tively unaware, they still belong as a fully human being: by God, in Christ,
and through the Holy Spirit.
In We-Thou Communion: “There is neither cognitively abled or disabled,
Jew nor Greek, slave nor free, male nor female, for you are all one in
Christ Jesus” (paraphrasing Gal 3:28; my emphasis). If we need full cogni-
tive capacity to respond to God’s love, then “Christ died for nothing” (Gal
2:21; my emphasis). Indeed, nothing can separate any one of us from the
love of Christ: neither death nor life, nor cognitive impairment, nor any-
thing else in creation (Rom 8:35–38; my paraphrase).
In Christ we are all brought into community with God and with each
other; we do not stand before God alone, but rather we are united in the
church. Community with God and with each other, gathered together in
the Holy Spirit, lies at the heart of We-Thou Communion. In communion,
we gather as “We” before the “Thou” of God. Within We-Thou
Communion, what is important is who we are, not what we do: each of us
is included, despite our limitations and differences.
Upheld in We-Thou Communion, I am not my dementia: I am held in
grace to the Father, through the Son, and by the Holy Spirit. The Body of
Christ remembers for me, and re-members me. It is Christ to me, and can
continue to relate to me throughout my lived experience of dementia.

Notes
1. The translator, W. Kaufmann, of the 1970 edition writes that the term Thou has been
misinterpreted as being theological, but was intended by Buber to focus on
relationships between people (Buber, 1970, pp. 14–17).
2. Bonhoeffer wrote of the community of saints (sanctorum communio), which gathers
people together in communal worship, listening to the word and taking
the sacraments.
3. An example of dementia-specific Christian worship is provided by Meaningful Ageing
Australia (2016).

Acknowledgments
Professor E. MacKinlay provided valuable insights for the preparation of this article.

References
Anglican Church of Australia (1995). A prayer book for Australia. Mulgrave, VIC:
Broughton Publishing.
Antus, E. L. (2013). Disability at the heart of theology: On marginality, method, and over-
coming “best-case anthropologies”. Journal of Religion, Disability and Health, 17(3),
244–262. doi:10.1080/15228967.2013.809879
14 C. BRYDEN

Bonhoeffer, D. (2009). In J. von Soosten (Ed.), Sanctorum Communio: A theological study

of the sociology of the church (R. Krauss & N. Lukens, trans.). Minneapolis, MN: First
Fortress Press.
Bryden, C. (2002). A person-centred approach to counselling, psychotherapy and rehabilita-
tion of people diagnosed with dementia in the early stages. Dementia, 1(2), 141–156.
Bryden, C. (2005). Dancing with dementia. London, UK: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
Bryden, C. (2012). Who will I be when I die? (Revised edition). London UK: Jessica
Kingsley Publishers.
Bryden, C. (2015a). Before I forget. Melbourne, VIC: Penguin Random House Australia.
Bryden, C. (2015b). Nothing about us, without us. London, UK: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
Bryden, C. (2016). A spiritual journey into the I-Thou relationship: A personal reflection
on living with dementia. Journal of Spirituality, Religion and Aging, 28(1-2), 7–14. doi:
10.1080/15528030.2015.1047294
Bryden, C. (2018a). Letter to the Church. Journal of Disability & Religion, 22(1), 96–106.
Bryden, C. (2018b). A continuing sense of self in the lived experience of dementia. Journal
of Religion, Spirituality & Aging, 30(3), 279–290.
Bryden, C. (2019a). Will I still be me? Finding a continuing sense of self in the lived experi-
ence of dementia. London, UK: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
Bryden, C. (2019b). The narrative self in the lived experience of dementia. In F. Gibson
(Ed.), Reminiscence and life review: International perspectives. London, UK: Jessica
Kingsley Publishers.
Bryden, C., & MacKinlay, E. (2002). Dementia—a spiritual journey towards the divine: A
personal view of dementia. In E. MacKinlay (Ed.), Mental health and spirituality in later
life. New York, NY: Haworth Pastoral Press.
Bryden, C., & MacKinlay, E. (2008). Dementia: A Journey Inwards to a Spiritual Self. In E.
MacKinlay (Ed.), Ageing, disability and spirituality: Addressing the challenge of disability
in later life. London, UK: Jessica Kingsley Publishers.
Buber, M. (1970). I and thou (W. Kaufmann trans. of 1937 ed.), Charles Scribner’s Sons.
Clapp, R. (2004). God is not “a stranger on the bus.” In D. B. Laytham (Ed.), God is not
… religious nice “one of us” an American a capitalist. Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press.
Green, J. B. (1998). Bodies—that is, human lives. In W. S Brown, N. Murphy, & H.
Newton Maloney (Eds.), Whatever happened to the soul? Scientific and theological por-
traits of human nature (pp. 149–173). Minneapolis, MN: Augsburg Fortress.
Grenz, S. J. (2006). The social God and the relational self. Towards a theology of the Imago
Dei in the postmodern context. In R. Lints, M. Horton, & M. R. Talbot (Eds.), Personal
identity in theological perspective. Grand Rapids, MI: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing.
Hauerwas, S. (2014). Approaching the end. Eschatological reflections on church, politics, and
life. London, UK: SCM Press.
Hauerwas, S., & Vanier, J. (2008). Living gently in a violent world. The prophetic witness of
weakness. Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press.
Hudson, R. E. (2016). God ’s faithfulness and dementia: Christian theology in context.
Journal of Religion, Spirituality and Aging, 28(1-2), 50–67. doi:10.1080/
15528030.2015.1041669
Kevern, P. (2012). Community without memory? In search of an ecclesiology of liberation
in the company of people with dementia. International Journal for the Study of the
Christian Church, 12(1), 44–54. doi:10.1080/1474225X.2011.598347
Kinghorn, W. A. (2016). “I am still with you:” Dementia and the Christian wayfarer.
Journal of Religion, Spirituality and Aging, 28(1-2), 98–117. doi:10.1080/
15528030.2015.1046633
 JOURNAL OF DISABILITY & RELIGION 15

Koenig, J. (1985). New testament hospitality. Minneapolis, MN: Fortress Press.

Laytham, D. B. (2004). Introduction. In D. B. Laytham (Ed.), God is not … religious, nice,
“one of us,” an American, a capitalist (pp. 9–22). Grand Rapids, MI: Brazos Press.
MacKinlay, E. (2016). Journeys with people who have dementia. Journal of Religion,
Spirituality and Aging, 28(1-2), 24–36. doi:10.1080/15528030.2015.1046632
McCall, R. D. (2000). In my beginning is my end. Remembering the future shape of liturgy.
Anglican Theological Review, 82(1), 17–27.
Meaningful Ageing Australia (2016). Dementia-specific Christian worship service handbook.
Melbourne.
Mercer, J. A. (2017). Old, frail, called by God: How our limitations are opportunities,
Christian Century, July 5, 2017.
Post, S. (1995). The moral challenge of Alzheimer’s disease, Baltimore, MD: Johns Hopkins
University Press.
Reinders, H. S. (2008). Receiving the gift of friendship: Profound disability, theological
anthropology, and ethics. Grand Rapids, MI: Wm. B. Eerdmans Publishing.
Reynolds, T. E. (2012). Theology and disability: Changing the conversation. Journal of
Religion, Disability and Health, 16(1), 33–48. doi:10.1080/15228967.2012.645612
Swinton, J. (2012). Dementia. Living in the memories of God, Cambridge, UK: Wm. B.
Eerdmans Publishing Co.
Weaver, G. D. (1986). Senile dementia and a resurrection theology. Theology Today, 42(4),
444–456. doi:10.1177/004057368604200404
Wells, S. (2015). A Nazareth Manifesto: Being with God. Grand Rapids, MI: John Wiley and
Sons. Incorporated, created from csuau on 2019-03-04 18:08:09.
Wells, S. (2017). Incarnational ministry: Being with the Church. Grand Rapids, MI:
Eerdmans Publishing.
Vanier, J. (2003). Becoming human. London, UK: Darton, Longman, Todd.
Zizioulas, J. D. (1975). Human capacity and human incapacity: A theological exploration of
personhood. Scottish Journal of Theology, 28(05), 401–444. doi:10.1017/
S003693060003533X