Changes in Our Lives

Think about an important change you made in your life.

1. Describe the change.

I think the best change that I’ve made to myself as of now is to become a
person who can voice out feelings. Before, I am the type of person who choose
to be quiet all the time specifically inside our house. I am an observant, and
always observed all the behaviors of each members in the family but I never talk
about it. My father favors my step mother and his daughter. And they would
show that the three of them are only the family in our house. When her
daughter made a mistake, he tolerates it all the time and take her side instead of
scolding. I am the daughter from his first wife which is my mother and we are
the legal one because my mom and him is married. But I was actually treated
like a boarder here. I really felt that I am not belong to their family because of
their action and that is what they want me to feel. All my pains, dissatisfaction
and resentment were kept all by myself. I want to talk about it and speak out
but I don’t have the guts to do it because I can’t. Not until last November 4,
2020, there was a mess made by my father’s favorite princess. Then, as an
oldest among them I talk to her and correct her, but she cried and here we go
my father take her sides without knowing anything. My father scold me, and
that’s the time I feel like a bomb that explode. I talk to my father through chat
because he has a work. I became officious and told him that her daughter was
very spoiled by them that’s why she doesn’t even know what good manners is.
For the first time in my life I speak out about my right and correct them. I was
also able to speak about my pains, dissatisfaction and resentment.

2. What were you thinking going through the change?

At first, I am hesitant if I am going to speak out or not. But at the end I just did
because I just said to myself that this enough and this is a right thing to do. I
won’t be scared because I am saying the facts. I wanted them to know what I
feel, also for them to know what they should do after so they would aware what
they are like and how their treatments.
3. How were you feeling before, during and after you made the change?

Before, I felt heavy in my heart, was hurt and in pain because all my
dissatisfaction and resentment to them is killing me emotionally but I can’t bring
it out. But right now, after I had it out. I feel okay that I am freed from pain.