Kirsten Gauvey

TECM 2700

Professor Wagle

September 25, 2021

LinkedIn Header & Summary

Header

Kirsten Gauvey
UNT Student | Biomedical Engineering Major | Business Entrepreneurship Track &
Mathematics Minor | UNT BMES

Summary
I am a student at The University of North Texas and am currently pursuing a Bachelor of Science in
Biomedical Engineering. I major in the studies of medical device manufacturing and apply
engineering fundamentals to solve issues in medicine and biology.
Throughout school and my childhood, I have always had a passion for science, puzzle-solving, and a
great interest in the medical industry. With STEM being my strong suit, engineering was the obvious
and most fitting career choice for me.
For my future career objectives, I plan on seeking an internship role where I can expand my
responsibilities as a working student while gaining valuable research and design skills.

Link
https://www.linkedin.com/in/kirsten-gauvey-9a04ba221/
PEER REVIEW INSTRUCTIONS: Your peer reviews will release after Sunday, Sept 26,
once everyone has had a chance to submit their assignment.
Use the peer review button on the right side of this page to complete your peer
reviews. Copy the prompts below into your peer-to-peer feedback and answer the
prompts based upon the submission you're reviewing to help him/her improve the final
draft. How well does the submission:
How effectively does your peer summarize his/her previous experience? Identify
one detail that helps "show" readers experience rather than tell them. Also,
identify examples where your peer could be more effective in showing his/her
experiences.
===> The writer has expressed their childhood interest but there is no indication of
previous work or study experience. Including the work or study in related field of their
major be helpful in getting hired.
How effectively does the summary identify career goals or accomplishments? Are
there areas where these goals/accomplishment could be better defined?
===> I think this summary is not good enough to get job. Having passion for something
is nice but the employer might want to see your work or any experience and
achievements. May be including some qualification will be nice addition.
Does your peer use a professional but personal writing styles? Are there any
words or phrases that should be revised to help make the summary more
impactful?
===> this is really nice professional writing with no grammatical errors. All the sentences are
ordered in perfect order. I don’t see any sentences that need to be improved.
What keywords does the summary include that you think are relevant to your
peer's industry? Can you think of different or more specific keywords?
===> On the second paragraph, I think writer should replace medical industry with
healthcare industry or medical field. Also, it is weird seeing someone having interest in
medical industry, they might rewrite it as interested on seeing how medical instruments
works or can save someone’s life.
What action words/verbs does your peer use to summarize his/her qualifications?
===> There are no action words used in summary. I don’t see any related work or study
done by the writer to use the action word.
What action words/verbs do you suggest changing to strengthen the summary?
===> I think to use action word, writer must include any work or research study related
to the major or the future job that she is applying for.