Dear Miss Lonely Love

By: ElvishGrrl

Fandom: vampire diaries

Summary: Elena Gilbert has a secret iden ty - she's the writer behind the
town paper's popular "Dear Miss Lonely Love" advice column. Some of the
le ers she receives stand out more than others. One makes her suspicious
a girl she knows might be being abused, and Elena's determined to get to
the bo om of it. Another, from a guy with a broken heart, begins a unique
correspondence. AU/AH

Fic type: TV Shows/Vampire Diaries

Pairings/Main char.: Elena G., Damon S.

Published: 2014-02-09

Last updated: 2017-03-31

Words count: 116,579

Chapters count: 26

Converted using www.FF2EBOOK.com

Date: 2017-03-31
1. Chapter 1
*DISCLAIMER* I do NOT own The Vampire Diaries or the characters
associated with The Vampire Diaries. No copyright infringement
intended. The original story herein, however, belongs to me. This story is
a work of fic on. Any resemblance to any persons, living or dead, or any
real life occurrences is en rely coincidental.

Dear Miss Lonely Love

Prologue

Mys c Falls is, for all intents and purposes, your typical Virginian small
town. It can be found in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains nestled
into a bend of the majes c Mys c River, about a mile downriver from the
falls itself.

Like most American towns, it has a Town Hall fronted by audacious white
Doric columns hung with red, white and blue bun ng; the square bell
tower of the Methodist Church faces off against the pointed bell tower of
the Bap st Church across the street, both parking lots filled to overflowing
every Sunday; the downtown is lined with false-fronted small businesses
that have been there since long before anyone can remember, like the
barber shop, the five and dime, the bakery and the Avalon theater; across
the street, the town newspaper, The Mys c Falls Herald, flies Ole' Glory
proudly from each corner of its awning; and next door resides the Mys c
Grill, where the townsfolk gather to eat, drink and socialize.

And a li le further down on the corner, just before you'd turn onto Route 4
to drive past all the big Colonial mansions along the river's edge toward the
high school, sits Gilbert's Coffee Clutch. Inside, once the last patron has le
for the night, you'll usually find the owner's teenage daughter Elena Anne
Gilbert hunched over her laptop, fingers flying wildly across the keyboard
as she completes some assignment or another.
The ci zens of Mys c Falls s ll do most things the old-fashioned way. Sure,
modern technology has seeped in – most homes now have wide-screen
televisions and computers and PlaySta ons. Quite a few of the residents
own cell phones. But that hasn't stopped people from going about life the
same way they always have. The Crow's Nest downtown s ll does steady
business selling books and magazines, although they've added gree ng
cards and seasonal novel es to their shelves nowadays. The library always
services a constant stream of readers. The phone inside the phone booth
out front of the Grill is in good working order and gets regular use,
especially on a Saturday night. And The Herald s ll produces a daily
newspaper, except on Sundays of course, which is delivered to nearly every
household and business in town.

So yes, modern mes have come a-knocking, but they've only been
welcomed in so far. Mys c Falls is, like many rural small towns, stubborn
and stuck in its ways. Change beckons, but is mostly regarded with
skep cism. Or, as is o en the case here, ignored completely.

Chapter 1

Elena Gilbert was fully aware that the ci zens of Mys c Falls also s ll wrote
le ers - o en handwri en ones. They sent e-mails and texts and tweets,
some of them, too. But a surprising number s ll enjoyed pu ng pen to
paper. She would know, because she was the recipient of such personal
missives each and every week.

Elena, in addi on to her job pouring coffee and serving sandwiches and
pastries in her father's café, was also the proud, if clandes ne, author of
The Herald's weekly 'Dear Miss Lonely Love' column. Only one other
person knew she was really Miss Lonely Love, besides her editor that is,
and that was her best friend in the world, Bonnie Benne . She knew
Bonnie could keep a secret, so Elena felt safe in the knowledge that her
alter-ego wouldn't be revealed.
And secret iden ty it was. Elena had a carefully cra ed persona for Miss
Lonely Love. The byline was credited to Shara Strong, and Shara Strong,
though fic onal, was a Grown Up. Shara Strong was definitely not an
eighteen year-old senior at Mys c Falls High – she was twenty-eight, with
plenty of experience in the field of da ng and romance before marrying
the Man of Her Dreams. The regular readers of 'Dear Miss Lonely Love'
were well aware Shara was neither a Miss nor Lonely; she made regular
men on of how she landed her handsome, perfect husband. Elena
assumed, correctly, that if her readers believed she had been so successful
in love, they'd be more inclined to trust her for advice with their own
concerns.

Which was ironic really, because Elena was nothing of the sort. She was, in
fact, single.

She had dated, had a few boyfriends even, but never anyone serious. She
thought she was s ll too young for real rela onships, and had spent much
of the past year barely thinking about boys. Concentra ng on her school
work and working her two jobs, not to men on taking care of her father
and brother and squeezing in occasional free me with her friends – well,
it didn't leave much room for da ng.

Not that she had any problem with that. She didn't. She knew she needed
to graduate at the top of her class in June in order to win a scholarship to a
good college – and therefore escape from Mys c Falls. Falling in love would
only complicate her life. And she didn't want complica ons.

This evening she sat at the counter, almost empty mug of hot chocolate in
hand, polishing her column for Friday's paper. She had just finished
advising a teenage girl, whom she strongly suspected might be a friend of
her brother Jeremy, that she needed to stand up for herself to her
controlling boyfriend. Elena was pre y sure Jeremy was between
girlfriends right now, but this le er, which had arrived as an e-mail, caused
her to make a mental note to ques on him about his da ng status
tomorrow. Just to be sure.
Once she was happy with her responses, she e-mailed the document to her
editor and shut her laptop. A glance up at the hands of the clock over the
door showed she s ll had ten minutes un l she could lock up.

Some mes, if Elena read a message she felt really deserved a response but
she'd already finished her column for the week, she would take a few
moments to send the writer a personal reply. So tonight with passing
curiosity she pulled the top le er from the bundle in her knapsack.

The wri ng was small and cramped, with jagged crow-scratch ver cal lines.
It obviously had been wri en by a man. Elena was no handwri ng expert,
but she'd be willing to bet he was a troubled man.

Dear Miss LL,

I've got a messed up situa on for you. What do you do when the love of
your life dumps you for your brother a er you find out she's been having an
affair with him behind your back? You thank your lucky stars you're free of
her, right? Problem is - I can't stop thinking about her. She stabbed me
through the heart, and I le town and haven't spoken to either of them
since. But the sad truth is…I'm s ll in love with her. I'm afraid if she
apologized and groveled I'd take her back. Now I'm not dumb enough to
think that's ever going to happen, but my ques on for you is, how do I stop
loving her?

Just Another Idiot

Elena pursed her lips as she read the le er a second me. She had
answered ques ons about chea ng before of course, but never chea ng
which involved sleeping with two brothers at the same me, then breaking
up with one to begin publicly da ng the other. She had to agree with the
writer - that was messed up indeed.

Tapping her fingernails absentmindedly against the countertop, she

contemplated how to reply. She tried to imagine how she might feel if she
found herself in a situa on like that, and how she would want to deal with
it. She tore out a fresh sheet of paper from her notebook, picked up her
trusty Bic and began to write.

Dear JAI,

Even though I can't include your le er in my column - sorry! - I felt

compelled to send you a personal reply.

You're absolutely right. You should just get down on your knees and thank
the stars you're free of her. The problem is that reality doesn't always work
that way, as you seem well aware. Love isn't something you can turn off
like flicking a switch. It burrows deep inside you and holds on ght. The
only thing that might help to lessen its grip on you is me, I'm sorry to say.
But I think you already know that, too.

Good on you for leaving town, though. Space and me away from the two
of them is precisely what you need right now. I'd recommend you get out
and meet people. It might surprise you how new friends can distract from
old problems. And you should consider maybe star ng to date again, even
if it's just casual.

Be strong. Someday you'll look back on all this and know it was for the
best.

Best of luck!

Miss LL

Elena carefully folded her reply and tucked it into an envelope. The return
address was a local post office box, which she scrawled across the front.
Looking to the clock again, she noted with relief that it was finally me to
head home.

She packed up her things and pulled on her heavy coat, hat and mi s
before dimming the lights in the small shop. The welcome bell over the
door nkled eerily as she stepped out into the chilly night and locked it
behind her.
Mys c Falls in mid-January a er midnight was cold and s ll. The silence
was so overwhelming Elena's eardrums interpreted it as a low roar, a
crowd cheering off in the distance, a jet plane passing far overhead at six
hundred miles an hour. The emp ness felt absolute, with just the fading
echo of the bell to ground her in reality.

The crisp air was clear, marred only by the white mist of her exhala ons.
Her boots squeaked on the hard packed snow, and as she walked she
looked up at the sky. The stars seemed to shine brighter than ever, too
frigid to even twinkle.

The buildings were dark, the snow was light and the few streetlights cast
long shadows in every direc on. A mailbox stood on the corner, its blue
paint so vivid it seemed to glow among all the monochrome. When Elena
reached it, she paused for a moment to pull the le er from her pocket and
slip it inside.

She took a deep breath, filling her lungs with ice. Then as quickly as she
could she crunched along the frozen sidewalk, anxious to reach the
warmth of home.

Friday morning's alarm was always unwelcome. On Thursday nights Elena

had to close up her father's coffee shop late, and the resul ng lack of sleep
tended to make her grouchy.

The crash of the alarm clock hi ng the floor as her flailing hand knocked it
off the nightstand only jolted her further from dreamland. With a groan
she pushed back the covers, reluctantly emerging from her cozy cocoon.
Half-awake, she trudged to the bathroom, pounding on her brother's
bedroom door to rouse him along the way. An annoyed groan from within
was her only response.

Her father had already le over an hour ago to open the shop for the
before-work crowd in need of their morning fix. Every morning but Sunday
it was just Elena and Jeremy, figh ng over the bathroom, scrambling to
scrounge up breakfast and make it down to the corner without missing the
school bus.

This morning, wonder of wonders, they both sat at the kitchen table at the
same me, Elena with toast and peanut bu er in one hand and a mug of
green tea in the other, Jeremy pouring himself an enormous bowl of half
Raisin Bran, half Fruit Loops. He claimed it gave him the protein and energy
he needed to get going - he was on the basketball team. Elena just rolled
her eyes and silently worried he'd become diabe c if he didn't watch it.

An e-mail from her editor reminded her of the last le er she'd included in
her column the night before.

"Hey Jer?"

With barely a glance her way he shoved a heaping spoonful into his mouth.
"Mmm?"

"You seeing anyone these days?"

His eyes widened, and he flushed as he swallowed. "Um, no. Not right now.
Why?"

Elena shrugged. "Just curious. It's been a few months since you split with
Anna. I wondered if you and Vickie might be…"

"No! I mean, we're friends, and she's hot and all…but she's seeing Tyler
Lockwood."

She screwed up her face at the men on of Tyler's name. "Ugh."

"Yeah."

Now Elena was more suspicious than ever that the e-mail might have come
from Vickie Donovan. Tyler was the captain of both the football and
basketball teams and, in her opinion, a complete alpha male douche. His
ego was nearly as big as his father's. Richard Lockwood was the mayor of
Mys c Falls. The Lockwoods had been one of the original families to se le
in this area. So had the Gilberts actually, but that might be the only thing
the two families had in common. Grayson Gilbert was content to live a
quiet life, and though his shop was moderately successful, Elena knew
some months they barely scraped by. The Lockwoods had money and
power – lots of it. They lived in the largest of the riverfront mansions along
Route Four, with mul ple acres of both beau fully landscaped and heavily
wooded property behind. They were famous for hos ng lavish par es;
their Fourth of July bash was an event not to be missed by anyone in town.
And Founding Families were a mandatory presence at such events, which
meant Elena had to endure every last one of them.

She sighed and glanced at the clock on the stove. Crap! "The bus is gonna
be here any minute!" she exclaimed, dumping the remains of her tea into
the sink.

As always, Jeremy headed straight for the back of the bus where the other
members of his posse awaited him. Elena sat down beside Bonnie near the
middle. She noted her brother dropped into a seat with Vickie. Tyler, of
course, drove himself to school in his brand-spanking-new red SUV. If he
was da ng Vickie, he hadn't bothered to give her a li today.

Elena cha ed with Bonnie un l they pulled up out front of the gray stone
and red brick castle that was Mys c Falls High. It was on the opposite side
of Route 4, and the upper floor windows and turrets had a majes c view of
the park and river bend across the way.

The high school had been built in 1915, at the height of the architectural
castle craze that had swept across America. Now its hulking edifice seemed
a li le out of place; an embarrassment to be ridiculed by the students, a
point of pride to the mayor and town council, and a roadside a rac on to
outsiders.

Elena thought it was beau ful. She had loved this building ever since she
was small – years before she'd even stepped foot inside its hallowed halls.
Even when she was having a truly crappy day, she only needed to trot up
the stairs to the highest tower, look out the window at the view, and she
would instantly feel a bit be er – like something clicked inside and she
understood her place in the world, just for a moment, and she felt like she
was where she belonged.

It had been a busy evening, but the Clutch was finally star ng to empty out
as people headed over to the Grill, or home, or wherever else they needed
to be on a Saturday night. Elena had just delivered a cruller and refilled the
mug of her history teacher, Mr. Tanner.

As she wiped the crumbs and dribbles from a recently deserted table, she
glanced over at the boy si ng in the back corner. Well…he really wasn't a
boy, was he? He was pale and slim, with dark hair mostly hidden under a
black Greek fisherman's cap. He wore nted glasses and, as usual, had his
nose buried in a book. As usual because, although Elena had no idea who
he was, she realized he'd been in her shop before. Several mes. Always
when she's been too busy with customers to really pay him much no ce.
She remembered he wore those glasses, that cap, and his black pea coat,
and always ordered a cup of coffee, also black. He carried his own stainless
steel travel mug, so had no need for one of the red Gilbert's Coffee Clutch
cups.

"Excuse me, Elena?"

She started, jolted from her thoughts, and turned to the elderly woman
who sat at a side table with her husband, as they did nearly every Saturday
evening.

"Yes, Mrs. Clancy? Can I top you up?"

"No, thank you. I just wanted to tell you, you look lovely in that shade of
blue."

Mr. Clancy nodded in agreement, before returning his a en on to his wife

and giving her a smile. They had told Elena a few weeks ago they'd been
married for forty-eight years.
Ge ng to his feet, Mr. Clancy helped Mrs. Clancy up and held out her coat
for her to ease her arms into. They had matching down jackets with big fur-
trimmed hoods. Perfect for a chilly January night.

"Thank you. Be careful on the icy sidewalks," she advised as they said
goodnight.

Soon Mr. Tanner, too, le his money on the counter and headed out into
the cold. Fi een minutes later no one remained but her and the dark,
handsome stranger.

Elena sucked in a breath, straightened her spine and walked back to him.

"Warm you up?" she asked, pot of coffee extended expectantly.

He looked up at her and lowered his glasses, and Elena's breath caught in
her throat. He had the most incredible pair of clear blue eyes she'd ever
seen. In the harsh ar ficial light of the shop they appeared almost aqua
really, with a thin dark rim around the outer edge of the irises. Long black
lashes framed those mesmerizing eyes. And right now they were staring at
her inquisi vely.

'-in mind?"

Crap. She'd missed most of that, lollygagging at the pre y. Heat flooded
her cheeks. "Pardon?"

"I said, 'depends what you had in mind,'" he replied with a smirk. She
flushed deeper as she realized the double entendre of what she'd asked.
Warm you up. Oh God.

"More c-coffee?" she stu ered. Get a grip, Elena. You le yourself wide
open for that one.

"No thanks." He flashed her a smile. "I should probably head out. Aren't
you about ready to close up?"
His smile was as striking as the rest of him, and the sight of it made Elena's
embarrassment ease up a bit. She wondered how old he was. She was sure
she'd have remembered if she'd seen him at the high school. No, he was
definitely not a teenager. But not by a lot. "We're open ' l midnight
Thursday to Saturday," she told him. "I have to stay, even if there's no one
else here."

"That sucks. Don't you get bored?"

She shook her head. "Nah. I usually do homework or read or something. I

never have any problem passing the me."

He looked her up and down and her temperature shot up again. "You're in
high school…" He paused to check out her name tag. "Elena?"

"For a few more months," she admi ed.

One black brow arched though ully. "Huh. I pegged you for older."

"I'm eighteen. Why? How old are you?"

His eyes narrowed for a split second, as if he wasn't sure he wanted to

answer. Then that easy grin returned. "Twenty-two. Just moved to town a
few weeks ago."

"Welcome to Mys c Falls. What brings you to our quaint li le burg?" She
sat down opposite him. Why not? There were no other customers around
to serve.

He sighed, so so ly she almost didn't hear it. "That's a long story I'd rather
not relive right now. My uncle owns a former boarding house way down
Route 4 just outside of town. I'm staying with him at the moment."

Elena's eyes lit up. "Oh! Your uncle is Zach Salvatore! I know him – he
comes in here some mes."

"Yep." His gaze shi ed down to the book res ng on the Formica.
"What're you reading?" She reached to flip it so she could see the cover.
"The Great Gatsby? I'm reading that for English right now! Well, I actually
got so into it I couldn't put it down and finished it in two days, but I'm re-
reading at the pace we're supposed to be at. Have you read it before?"

He pressed his lips together a bit self-consciously. "Eleven mes," he

confessed, one corner of his mouth twitching up in a small half-smile.

Elena's eyebrows flew up in surprise. "Wow. Maybe I should get you to

help me with the four thousand word essay I have to write on it then," she
said with a teasing grin.

"Maybe," he mumbled, shi ing uncomfortably on the hard plas c chair.

Tucking the book away inside his jacket, he stood up abruptly. "I've go a
get going. Thanks for the coffee and conversa on."

She wondered if she'd said something wrong. They'd seemed to be ge ng

along fine, but now he looked like he wanted to be any place but here.
Scrambling to her feet as well, she amended, "You don't actually have to
help me. I was just kidding."

Their eyes met as he adjusted his cap, for a moment revealing more of that
thick messy hair. A wa of cologne hit her as they stood in such close
proximity, and hot desire clenched low in her belly.

"I don't mind if you wanna talk over your essay. As you might've guessed,
it's one of my favorite novels. Maybe I'll see you in here next week. Have a
good rest of your night, Elena."

She didn't reply at first, frozen in thought as she watched him walk away.

Just as he reached the door she cried, "Wait!" He glanced back. "I don't
even know your name." Her voice came out sounding much younger than
her eighteen years.

With a ght smile, he replied, "It's Damon."

Then he slipped out into the night.

A/N Yes, I'm back with something new. No, it's not the sequel to TSM. Not
yet, but that will come later. I just needed a bit of a break from those
characters, but I will write them again. Please let me know your thoughts
by leaving me a review in the li le box below. You don't have to have a FF
account to leave a review - anyone can do it. :) Thank you so much!

Special thanks to LoveDE for betain, and to Anglcdmn1986 and

scarle 2112 for pre-reading and giving me advice. Love you guys.

If you want to, you can follow me on tumblr or ask under: elvishgrrl
2. Chapter 2
Chapter 2

When Zach handed him the le er as he sat reading in the drawing room on
Tuesday a ernoon, Damon was surprised, to say the least. He couldn't
remember the last me he'd go en an actual le er from someone. It
might have been back in high school when that crazy Amber chick had a
mad crush on him. He vaguely recalled her some mes mailing him stuff in
pointless and increasingly desperate a empts to get no ced.

This envelope was not decorated with hearts and kisses like those ones had
been. It was plain white and business-y looking. The handwri ng on the
front, however, was looped and swirled - definitely wri en by a woman. It
was addressed to JAI, at Zach's P.O. Box.

"How d'ya know it's for me?" he wondered as his uncle poked at the dying
embers in the fireplace. The boarding house was huge, rambling and, like
pre y much every other building around here, old. It was next to
impossible to keep warm, so at this me of year it was necessary to keep a
fire burning in the fireplace of any room you intended to spend any length
of me in.

"Sure not meant for me," Zach stated flatly, straightening up and hanging
the iron poker on its hook. He turned back to Damon. "You talk to your dad
yet?"

S ffening, Damon mu ered, "Nope."

"Stefan?"

"Nope."

Zach sighed. "Well at least they know you're here and didn't run off and do
something stupid. Any idea how long you might stay for?"
Their eyes met. Damon's blue irises were stony. "Does it ma er? Just tell
me when you're sick of me and I'll split."

Another sigh. "You're my brother's kid. I'm not going to kick you to the
curb, Damon. You're welcome here as long as you want."

Damon shrugged. "Don't know yet. But you'll be the first to know when I'm
moving on."

His uncle snorted. "Thanks for that much, I guess. I'm heading to the Grill
to pick up hot wings for dinner. You want?"

"Sounds good," Damon replied absently, his a en on turned back to the

le er in his hand. He heard Zach's footsteps cross the hardwood as he le ,
but didn't look back up.

Tearing open the envelope, he roughly pulled out the le er within, earning
himself a paper cut for his efforts. Two smudges of blood now stained the
white paper above the words, 'Dear JAI'.

Reading it over quickly, random phrases popped out at him:

'You're absolutely right."

'reality doesn't always work that way'

'burrows deep inside you and holds on ght.'

' me away from the two of them is precisely what you need'

'consider maybe star ng to date again'

With a groan he stood up, meaning to toss the le er into the fireplace.
Da ng? Yeah, right. Like he wanted to throw himself into that volcano
again. Rela onships just weren't for him. Da ng wasn't gonna happen.
Never again.
And it was all just pat advice, wasn't it? Nothing of any use to him. But
then again, why did he even think it would be? It was pointless. His
ques on was the most inane, the most unanswerable ques on in the
world. How do you stop loving someone? Ridiculous. Like he'd told himself
at least fi y mes before he'd dropped it into the mailbox - he shouldn't
even bother.

Damon crushed the page to a jagged white ball. The red bloodstain and the
scrawled blue le ers 'De' glared up at him accusingly.

Instead of fueling the fire with it, he dropped back to the couch and pulled
the le er open again, fla ening it over the tabletop with his hand, the
formerly smooth surface now rough below his palm. It brought to mind a
phrase from a book he'd read long ago: A heart is like a piece of paper -
once it's crumpled or torn it can never return to how it once was.

So the bitch had le permanent scars – so what? What did it fucking

ma er? She was happy back home with his brother, and he was si ng
here miserable in Mys c Falls. How was that fair?

Then Damon's eyes fell on something else Miss Lonely Love had advised.

'It might surprise you how new friends can distract from old problems.'

An image of the cute brune e with the big brown eyes from the coffee
shop suddenly popped into his head, and he smiled thinly to himself.
Maybe later he'd brave the cold in search of a caffeine fix.

School buses always seem to smell of a pungent blend of diesel exhaust,

old vinyl, and stale sweat. It's a universally accepted fact. Today's potpourri
of unpleasantness also included a vague hint of weed wa ing up from the
rear, and the rancid, yet sickly sweet odor of a decaying apple rolling
around beneath the seats. Elena tried to remember to breathe through her
mouth.
During the ride home she couldn't resist sliding what she hoped were
surrep ous glances behind her at Vickie Donovan. Vickie sat in the very
back seat with Jeremy again, whispering and giggling, their heads close
together. Elena wondered what Tyler would think if he could see them
right now. She assumed he would not be impressed - he was known to be
possessive with his 'toys'.

Snow-shrouded houses slid past her window as she forced herself to look
outside instead. Her mind was troubled. Elena had been the first one inside
the girls change room before Gym this a ernoon, third period History
having been dismissed a few minutes early for once. As she'd come around
a wall of lockers, she'd startled a half-dressed Vickie, the last straggler of
the juniors who'd been filing out a er the previous class.

Although the other girl was quick to pull up her jeans and throw on her
hoodie, it hadn't been fast enough to prevent Elena from no cing the
bruises on the inside of her upper arm. Small round ones - the kind that
could have been made by squeezing fingers.

Elena had stopped in her tracks, too shocked to speak.

Avoiding mee ng her eyes, Vickie had mu ered, "Hey," before scrambling
past her for the door.

Those marks had been weighing on Elena ever since. Could Vickie really be
the girl who wrote that le er to Miss Lonely Love last week? Could Tyler be
ge ng too rough with her behind closed doors? Elena didn't know for
sure, but her gut kept insis ng something wasn't right.

She stared outside, but she wasn't even aware the bus was nearing her
stop. She kept seeing that ugly purplish-yellow row of spots on Vickie's
arm. And the larger patches she'd glimpsed on her inner thighs.

The late a ernoon sunlight was star ng to fade as Elena sat on her bed
with Bonnie, discussing the differences between Gatsby and Nick. Bonnie
thought Gatsby was roman c and mysterious, while Nick was too much of
a boring buzz-kill. Elena argued that Gatsby was so fixated on his idealized
image of 'the one who got away' that it doomed him to repeat the
mistakes of his past.

Once they put their English homework aside, Elena leaned back against her
pillows. "Hey, so did you read my column this weekend?"

"I always do. Why?"

"Remember the le er from the girl about her asshole boyfriend?"

Wrinkling her forehead, Bonnie replied, "Um, I think so. He was a

controlling dick, right?"

"Yep. So, this might sound strange but…I've been wondering whether it
could be from Vickie Donovan."

Bonnie scrunched her face in thought. "She's seeing Tyler these days, isn't
she?"

Elena nodded.

"Hmm. Could be. I heard he treated Amber pre y shi y last year. I could
see it."

Though there was no one else in the house to overhear, Elena dropped her
voice to a whisper. "I ran into Vickie in the change room before gym today,
and she had bruises on her arm. It might be nothing, but…"

"But it might be something," Bonnie said, narrowing her eyes with

concern.

Elena didn't men on the other bruises she'd seen, the darker, uglier ones
lower down. For all she knew, maybe Vickie liked things a li le rough in
bed. And if so, that was no one's business but her and her partner. She just
sighed, "Yeah."
Bonnie began to gather up her books and binders, stuffing them one by
one into her knapsack. It was ge ng dark and her grandmother would be
expec ng her home for dinner soon. Then she stopped and looked back at
Elena. "What about telling Jeremy what you saw? He's friends with her –
he might know how she hurt her arm."

Bonnie had a good point. But Elena was beginning to wonder if her brother
was harboring a bit of a crush on Vickie. If he found out she'd been hurt,
he might confront Tyler about it - which would more than likely end up
ge ng ugly. Elena didn't really want to escalate things unless she found
more evidence to support her fears.

"That's true. But I don't think I'll men on the bruises. I'll just ask if she said
anything about injuring herself. It's possible it could be no big deal. If I tell
Jer my suspicions, and he says something to Vickie or Tyler, and it turns out
I'm wrong…well that would just be unpleasant for all of us."

"But if Tyler's hur ng her, he needs to be stopped, 'Lena."

"I know. And I totally agree. But I think we need more informa on before
we go jumping to any conclusions. First, let me try to find out what Jer
knows."

"Okay. I really hope it's nothing."

"So do I."

Tuesday nights were never very busy at the shop, and this cold, blustery
Tuesday night was even deader than usual. Elena had finished all her
cleaning a while ago, and now sat behind the counter sipping hot chocolate
and reading tonight's assigned chapter of F. Sco Fitzgerald's most famous
story.

The jingling of the bell over the door jarred her away from the lavish room
at the Plaza where Gatsby and Tom were embroiled in their tense
confronta on. She glanced up in annoyance, hoping whoever it was just
wanted a coffee to go.

Elena's eyes flared, a smile chasing away her irrita on as she saw the
familiar black cap and pea coat come inside. Damon. She was surprised to
see him back so soon; it had only been three nights since they'd talked. The
thought that he was probably here specifically to see her this me sent
nervous ngles through her body.

"Hi," she greeted him, slipping her bookmark between the pages and
standing up as he approached the counter. Damon's face was glasses-free
tonight and his blue eyes stood out like neon signs. Those eyes were
dangerous as hell – they probably melted the pan es off every woman he
ever met.

Pull yourself together, loser, she mentally scolded. As professionally as

possible, she asked, "Dark roast, black, right?"

He chuckled. "I'm impressed you remember."

Flushing, Elena turned to the row of coffee machines behind her, li ing the
only remaining pot and peering inside dubiously. As she swirled it around
the dark liquid oozed viscous fingers down the inside of the glass.

"I'll have to make a fresh pot. This stuff's sludge." Looking over her
shoulder at him, she flashed a ght grin. "Hope you're not in a rush." What
she really hoped was that he'd keep her company for a while. She closed
up at ten, which was s ll another hour away.

"No problem. I'd rather it be fresh anyway."

She rinsed out the pot, then measured and poured pungent coffee grounds
into the top of the machine, se ng the switch to brew. When she turned
around, she found Damon perched on a stool directly across from her, her
novel in his hands. His cap now rested on the counter beside her mug of
cooling chocolate, and he was combing his fingers through his hair to
unfla en it. Elena had a strange urge to reach over and mess it up further.
She wondered if that thick hair would feel as so as it looked.

He opened the book to where she'd le off and scanned the page. "Ah," he
observed with a quirk of his lips. "Things are star ng to heat up."

She had to agree. "That scene is so tense!"

Damon chuckled, tucking her bookmark back inside. "So when's your essay
due?"

"Um, a week from Friday. We have to finish the last two chapters this
week, then pick a theme and write an essay about it." She raised her mug
to her lips. Lukewarm chocolate was s ll miles be er than no chocolate at
all.

When she set it back down, he reached for it and took a sniff. "No wonder
the coffee was old. Even you're not drinking it!"

Self-consciously brushing a strand of hair off her face, she admi ed,

"Actually…funny story, but…I don't drink coffee."

Damon's eyes widened and a massive grin surfaced. "You work in a coffee
shop and you don't drink coffee?" He began to laugh.

"I work in my dad's coffee shop and I don't drink coffee," she clarified,
chuckling along with him.

"That explains why you're here all the me. You have no choice."

Elena's laughter stu ered to a halt. You have no choice. It was true. Sort of.
But he didn't know the whole of it, and she didn't intend to tell him. She
wanted to be here. She wanted to pitch in any way she could. "My brother
helps out some mes. And if we're really stuck, my friend Bonnie will fill in.
But Dad mostly tries to keep things in the family. It's simpler." She
deliberately le out the fact that she didn't get paid for these shi s, that
she just did whatever she could to help make ends meet since her mom
had passed away. The Gilbert's financial struggles were nobody's business
but their own.

"Family business. I get that. My dad runs a law firm in Richmond. I was
expected to go to law school." Damon rolled his eyes. "My brother's at U.
of V., following in the old man's footsteps. And I'm…well…here. Le ng
dear old Pops down, as usual."

A ping behind her startled Elena before she could respond, le ng her
know the fresh pot of coffee was ready. She bent down to retrieve a clean
mug from a lower shelf.

"No need," Damon reminded her. "You can just pour it in here. One less
dish to wash that way." He put his silver travel mug on the counter beside
his cap and twisted off the lid.

Her cheeks got hot again. Right. His travel mug. "Sorry, I forgot," she
mumbled, picking up the bubbling carafe to fill it. Now, what had they been
talking about? Oh right.

"So you don't want to be a lawyer. So what? Most lawyers are ego s cal,
manipula ve asses." That earned her a ght smile. Encouraged, she
con nued. "Did you go to college?"

"Not yet." Damon blew on the surface of the steaming liquid before taking
a tenta ve sip. "I want to go to teacher's college at some point. Once I
figure some shit out and get my life back on track, that is."

Elena took another swig of her chocolate. It was cold now. She upended
the mug to swallow the last of it.

"Your dad doesn't approve of you taking some me out in Mys c Falls, I
gather?"

He shrugged. "No clue. I haven't spoken to him since I le . Doubt it."

"What about your mom? Does she support you?"

Damon went s ll, his gaze now fixated on a spot on the countertop. For a
moment or two she thought he wasn't going to answer. Then he replied
so ly, "She would, if she was around. She died when I was twelve."

A flood of empathy came over Elena. She remembered far too well her
own mother's final months, days, moments. Some mes she wished she
could forget. Her reply was barely more than a whisper. "So did mine. Two
years ago."

Those intense blue eyes li ed to hers. They were full of understanding.

"I'm sorry."

She waved his words away, as usual trying to pretend like it was no big
deal, trying to brush it off like she always did to those who offered
sympathy. But she stopped herself. Maybe this me she didn't need to
pretend. Damon knew, a er all.

"Cancer," she stated with a small sigh.

"Ah. That sucks."

He didn't offer his own mother's cause of death and she didn't ask. She just
said, "Back atcha."

They sat in silence for a bit. It wasn't an awkward silence though; it was
companionable. Easy, even. Elena had never talked about her mom's death
with anyone who had lost their own mother. She found herself feeling
suddenly closer to Damon - which was crazy, because she didn't even know
him. But she realized she wanted to.

They ended up discussing favorite books for the last thirty minutes of her
shi . No further men on was made of disappointed fathers or dead
mothers. He waited un l she wiped down the coffee machine and dimmed
the lights, then followed her to the door.

The snow was coming down harder than ever, fat flakes driven in sheets by
each gust of wind coming down off the mountains to the northwest. Elena
shivered as she locked up, pulling her scarf ghter around her neck.

"Well, goodnight then," she said, looking up at Damon. Snowflakes were

mel ng on his already reddened cheeks, and he tugged the brim of his cap
lower.

"How're you ge ng home?" he wondered.

She glanced down the blustery street in the direc on she was headed.
"Um…I walk. It's not that far."

His eyes widened as he took another look around them. The light coming
off the nearest streetlight was no more than an otherworldly halo through
the blowing snow. "It's not a fit night for man nor beast. Let me give you a
li ."

She hesitated, and she knew he saw her reluctance.

"C'mon. I promise you I'm not a serial killer. Would you seriously rather
walk home in this than get into a vehicle with me?" Damon added a wink
and a smile, clearly determined to disarm any fears she might be
harboring.

Elena couldn't help but laugh. "Wouldn't a serial killer say exactly that to
charm me into his car?"

"Probably. But I don't drive a car; I drive a Jeep. Which is parked over there
buried under what looks like half a foot of snow." He gestured toward a
white-shrouded SUV across the way. "How handy are you with a snow
brush?"

She snorted. "I've spent eighteen winters in Mys c Falls. I think I can
handle it."

"Great," he grinned. "Let's go."

He pushed the snow off the driver's door with gloved hands before
unlocking it. Reaching behind the seat, he retrieved two long brushes with
bright red bristles. Each had matching plas c scrapers at the opposite end.

"I just happen to have two in here. Catch!" Damon tossed a snow brush her
way.

She reached up in surprise but was too slow; it flew over her shoulder and
landed in the slushy street behind her. Embarrassed, she scrambled to
retrieve it.

"Nice reflexes," he teased, leaning inside to start the engine. "Why don't
you climb on in and I'll take care of the de-entombing?"

Elena went around to the passenger side and pulled open the door. But
instead of ge ng inside, she just tossed her knapsack onto the seat. She
wasn't some wimpy girly-girl, and she certainly didn't want Damon to think
she required coddling.

With the first sweep of her brush along the roof she accidentally flicked
snow into his face. Before she could apologize, she heard him laugh from
the other side of the Jeep.

"Two can play that game," he warned before a volley of cold and wet flew
her way. Elena had just me to duck. Most of it landed on her blue knit hat,
although a few icy sprinkles caught her le temple.

The resul ng chaos, therea er referred to as the First Great Snow War of
2014, ended with a mostly cleaned off Jeep and two damp, snow-covered
and laughing occupants. Damon was the one to finally call a cease-fire,
and, as Elena was quick to point out, it looked like he had taken the brunt
of it. His coat and hat were made of thick wool, and snow stuck to nearly
every inch of both.

"Just admit I win then," she challenged, li ing her snow brush high in
triumph.
He shook his head, bits of snow flying from his hair, and chuckled so ly.
"Fine! You win. Just get inside. It's plenty warm now. Let me throw
something down so my seats don't get soaked." He pulled a tartan blanket
off the backseat and spread it across the two front ones.

Once they were both inside, Damon turned to her, one brow raised
ques oningly. "So?"

Her brows drew together. "So…what?"

He shook his head, smirking at her. "Did you get hit too hard in the head
with a snowball? Where do you live, Elena?"

Luckily she was sure her cheeks were already glowing from the exer on of
ba le. "Oh, right. Maple Street. Just turn right at the corner there onto
Juniper, then go down two blocks and take a le and that's Maple. It's
really not far. I walk home every night."

Though the streets weren't yet plowed, the Jeep had four-wheel drive and
made it to her place with li le problem. The Gilbert home was a small
white bungalow, its outline barely visible through all the camouflaging
snow. Jeremy's bedroom window glowed, and the welcome light over the
front door awaited her return.

"Thanks for the li , Damon," she said, picking her knapsack off the floor.

He offered a ght half-grin. "Don't men on it."

"Well, see you." She put her hand on the door handle, meaning to head
inside.

"We didn't talk about your essay subject," he said suddenly.

Elena looked back at him. "Oh right. It's okay. You don't have to-"

"I'll drop in to visit again in a few nights, and if you're not too busy we can
discuss it then." Damon's voice was firm.
"Um, okay. Sounds good. Drive safe."

As she opened the door and stepped out into the calf-deep snow, she
looked back at him and he was s ll watching her. That quivering sensa on
in her chest started up again.

"Goodnight, Elena," he said so ly.

"Goodnight."

When Damon got back to the boarding house, he felt antsy. Instead of
heading upstairs to his room to read, he went down the hallway to the
small gym in the back and jumped on the treadmill for twenty minutes. It
took him a while to figure out where all this energy had come from. Then it
hit him that he was happy. Happy. He snorted, shaking his head in
amazement. How fucking long had it been since he'd felt happy? So long
the emo on seemed nearly foreign. Apparently a chat about dead mothers
and a snow fight with a cute girl had done the trick, though. Who would
have thought? Oh, wait. Miss Lonely Love, that's who. He hadn't laughed
so much since…well, since Katherine, back when things had s ll been good.

A er a long hot shower, he stretched across his bed with the le er he'd
received earlier, once again smoothing the crinkles flat beneath his palm.
In the corner the fire crackled and spit behind the grate, sounds that made
him feel warmer just in hearing them. He'd enjoyed spending me with
Elena, and he thought about how chipper and full of energy he'd been
when he'd come in, at least before memories of Katherine had elbowed
their way back to the forefront.

Hanging out with Elena, goofing around with her - he'd felt so much lighter,
even if it had only lasted a couple of hours. It seemed the love advice sage
was right about the benefits of making a new friend. Elena was a great
distrac on. And it didn't hurt that when she smiled at him he felt
compelled to smile back.
On impulse Damon reached to the nightstand and grabbed his silver Cross
pen– a gi from his father when he'd graduated high school, no doubt
intended to flourish his signature on countless wealth-producing official
documents – and his journal, pressing it open to a fresh page. Pushing his
glasses higher on his nose, he began to write.

Dear Miss LL,

First off, thank you for taking the me to reply. Much appreciated.

Secondly, although I was ini ally skep cal of your advice to get out and
meet new people, tonight I decided to give it a shot. And lo and behold, you
were actually right. I met a girl. We talked, we laughed…I had fun. And I
haven't had 'fun' in a very long me.

As for your sugges on that I consider da ng again, well, that's where I'm
going to have to draw the line. No more rela onships. No more emo onal
a achments. To anyone. My ex was the last, for me. I refuse to put myself
through that any more. It's not just worth it.

I'm not wri ng this to ask for any more advice. I have no more ques ons for
you. I just wanted to say thanks.

JAI

Damon re-read what he'd wri en, hoped she could decipher his even
messier than usual scrawl, and then tore out the page. He'd mail it in the
morning. A wave of exhaus on had come over him, although it was barely
even midnight and he was normally a night owl.

Contrary to most nights these days, he fell into an easy sleep. His dreams
were haunted by beau ful women with long chestnut hair and big brown
eyes, one the she-devil who'd ripped out his heart, the other a smiling
angel with snow dus ng her lashes.
A/N Massive thank you to all of you who have reviewed and favourited this
story already. I really appreciate it! Extra thanks to LoveDE for proofreading
and Scarle 2112 for pre-reading and giving advice. Pre y please leave me
a review? Every one means a lot to me! Happy Sunday! xo
3. Chapter 3
Chapter 3

Ten Years Ago -

"Damon!"

He pauses with his fingers on the door handle, twis ng his head to look up
at her. She looks red, but her shoulders are straight and she holds herself
tall.

"Don't forget to swing by the pharmacy on your way home." Her voice is
low and rough. She s fles a cough against her shirtsleeve.

He nods. "I will, Mom."

A groan is heard from upstairs. "Mommy! I need yoooooouuu…"

"Just a minute, baby. I'll be right up," she calls. Her shiny black hair glows in
a beam of sunlight through the window. As she turns back to her older son
her narrow form is backlit, giving her an otherworldly halo. "I can't go
myself 'cause your brother's sick, and your father will be in court all day."
She puts a hand on his shoulder. Her eyes, blue as a cloudless summer day,
smile warmly down at him. Even in her current frail state, she is beau ful,
he thinks.

"I need you to be a good boy and pick up my inhaler for me."

"I promise," he assures her, pushing his glasses up on his nose and giving
her a bright grin.

She drops a kiss to his cheek and presses him out the door into the bright
May morning. Her lips are rough and dry, like sandpaper on his skin.

He has no idea it is the last me he will feel her touch.

Damon runs most of the way to school, nearly the en re eight blocks. He
runs partly because he knows he was a few minutes late leaving his house,
but mostly because he is hoping to make it inside the school doors before
he is spo ed by them.

The big boys. The Three Stooges, as he calls them in his head (he and his
mom used to some mes watch old movies in the a ernoons when a young
Stefan was napping.) Their real names are Mike, Sco y and Connor. They
are in the eighth grade, two years older and several sizes bigger than
Damon, who is scrawny for his twelve years. He's not sure why he's their
current target. Maybe it's because his clothes are nicer than theirs. Maybe
it's because he wears glasses and spends more me in the library than on
the baseball diamond. Who knows? Bullies prey on the weak. And they've
decided he's weak, and therefore deserving of their abuse.

It started about a month ago. Mike Rainier had been leaning against the
brick wall when Damon came out a side door of the school - the door
closest to the library. He'd stayed a bit late to help the librarian catalogue
and shelve all the new paperbacks that had just come in. It also didn't hurt
that Miss French had pale blonde hair, a cheerful smile, and smelled like
strawberries. Whenever she needed a hand he was always quick to
volunteer.

As he'd stepped outside, something had hit him hard in the shin and he'd
fallen face-first onto the asphalt, scraping up his chin in the process. At the
sound of laughter he'd looked up into Mike's beady brown eyes. The larger
boy's mouth chuckled, but the rest of his face scowled.

"Doofus," Mike had sneered, glaring down at him, silently challenging him
to try and retaliate.

Damon's chin had hurt like crazy, and when he'd swiped at it, a smear of
red came away on his dirt-encrusted fingers. His throat kno ed up
dreadfully at the sight of the blood, and baby tears rose in his eyes.
Scrambling to his feet, he tried to hold them in, knowing they would only
make things a hundred mes worse.
When he'd tripped, his knapsack had flown nearly ten feet across the
pavement. Mike walked over to it and gave it a kick, sending it ski ering off
to rest against the fence. Without looking back, he'd stuffed his hands in
his pockets and sauntered away. Damon had slowly go en to his feet and
collected his bag. He'd pressed a ssue to his bloody chin and stumbled
home, shameful teardrops burning his cheeks.

Then Mike and his friends started to follow him home some nights. If
Damon wasn't fast enough or smart enough and they caught him, the
results were always humilia ng. And painful. He'd come home with bruised
ribs, aching shoulder blades, some mes torn out knees in his jeans. If they
caught even a glimmer of a tear, the abuse would ratchet up about five
notches.

"Boo hoo hoo. The baby's gonna cry," Connor would tease.

Next Sco y would chime in. "Hey Four Eyes, you gonna blubber? Maybe
my fist in your face would shut you up."

"Don't wet your pants, Sissy Boy. Your momma might get mad."

Then they'd start to kick and punch and shove.

They are smart enough to not leave visible marks though, save for the scab
on his chin a er the first me Mike tripped him. And they know Damon
has never squealed. He's fully aware of what happens to kids who ta le.
Terrible things. Much worse things than he's had to endure so far. He's
heard the stories, and he's young, so he believes them.

Damon swears to himself that if he just makes it through the remaining

weeks of sixth grade alive, he's going to sign up for karate lessons this
summer. Maybe ju-jitsu, too. Anything to help defend himself come fall.
Sure, those three thugs will have hopefully graduated to high school by
then, but who knows which other bullies might take their place? Stefan
might even want to take a mar al arts class with him. Though he's three
years younger, it could be a fun thing for the two of them to do together,
and some day his baby brother might find himself in a similar situa on.
Damon shudders at the thought – Stefan is even scrawnier than he is, and
his lungs suck for running. He makes a mental note to ask Mom about it
when he gets home.

At lunch he gobbles his sandwich down, then heads straight for the library
to pass the rest of the recess. The Stooges never set foot inside the library
unless they have to, so he considers it his safe place.

Miss French is up on the sliding ladder pu ng away books on one of the

higher shelves. She's wearing a blue and white dress that stops just above
her knees. Seeing the long muscles on the backs of her calves stretching on
that ladder makes Damon feel ngles and twitches in certain places. Since
she hasn't no ced him yet, he hurries to the other side of the library, grabs
a book at random and drops into a chair, pulling himself right up to the
table so the evidence of his discomfort is hidden. His cheeks are hot, his
palms damp, as he looks down at the book he's taken. It's The Giving Tree.
He sighs. Great, he thinks. Real appropriate for a twelve year-old boy who's
read over half the books in this library. He reads it anyway.

When the final buzzer goes at three, Damon lingers packing his knapsack.
At last he shoulders it and steps outside, glancing around carefully for any
signs of trouble. The coast seems clear. He breathes a tenta ve sigh of
relief as he leaves the schoolyard.

A er a block he makes a detour, turning le on Washington Street instead

of con nuing straight, heading for the drug store as his mother had
requested. She has asthma, and this spring her allergies have been making
her a acks more frequent. About a month ago she'd even been
hospitalized for a couple days. Stefan inherited it from her, but his is
nowhere near as severe – at least not at this point in his young life. Mostly
he just uses his inhaler when he has an allergy a ack, or he runs around
too much and his lungs rebel.

Damon isn't hurrying. Now that he's away from school and off his usual
route he walks at a leisurely pace. His thoughts dri to Miss French's
flexing calves as she reaches to place a book on the shelf above her. In his
mind he sees the lower edge of her dress flu er against the smooth skin
above the backs of her knees. Suddenly his jeans feel too ght again, but
this me he doesn't mind all that much. It's happened before, and he isn't
embarrassed by it if he's alone.

He's too caught up in daydreaming about the school librarian's fascina ng

legs to realize there are voices behind him un l it's too late.

"Sissy Boy's not going home today."

A mocking laugh sends a shiver up Damon's spine. "Maybe he's headed to

his boyfriend's house?"

This is followed by raucous hoots and hollers.

Damon looks over his shoulder and is frustrated but unsurprised to find the
Stooges less than twenty feet behind him, and gaining. He shoves his other
arm into the empty knapsack strap and breaks into a run, knowing if they
catch him this me it will be bad. Not just bad - awful.

The boys may be big, but they can move fast when they want to. And right
now they are definitely mo vated. Damon hears the pounding of three
pairs of feet on the pavement as they try to close the distance to him. He
pushes himself harder, diving between vehicles when he reaches the
intersec on at Elm, dodging around a white van whose horn blast echoes
through his skull as he narrowly avoids being crushed into the back end of
the Volvo halted at the stop sign. Up over the curb he jumps, flying past
the pharmacy with its blue neon sign, past the tantalizing smells wa ing
from the barbeque joint next door, past the hair salon and coffee shop. He
spots a break in the cars moving parallel to him on Washington and shoots
through it, feeling the rush of displaced air from a passing Hummer push
him forward as he leaps onto the opposite sidewalk.

Sweat trickles down his spine as he slows, risking a glance behind him. Less
than half a block back he spots Connor poin ng his way, hears him shout
something at the others, clearly looking for an opening to cross traffic.
Adrenaline surges through him and Damon resumes pel ng down the
pavement. There are more pedestrians on this side of the street. Old ladies
with large handbags block his path as they examine the outdoor racks of
clothing in front of The Dress Den. The hard corner of a purse jabs him in
the right bicep as he passes.

Suddenly he spots the narrow laneway unobtrusively dividing that building

and the laundromat next door. Without a single thought, he darts down it.
It's a good thing Damon is so slim, because the way is not exactly clear
going. Old half-broken crates are stacked along one side. Garbage cans, a
couple abandoned ma resses and a smelly black dumpster sit further
down against the other.

As he dodges to avoid stepping on an old board on the ground – the rusty

nails poking up from it look sharp and probably tetanus-coated - one of his
sneakers skids in a puddle of who knows what and he goes down on one
knee, tearing a hole in both his new Tommy Hilfiger jeans and the skin
below. The muck now coa ng his leg and shoes is rancid, but that's the
least of his concerns. He looks fran cally behind him again to check if the
Stooges have caught up yet, if they saw his latest detour. With relief he
sees only the open-topped rectangle of sunlight. Its glow barely penetrates
the alley.

Damon drags himself to his feet and limps a few feet further into the
gloom, going around the end of the dumpster and slumping to the ground
on a discarded blanket. It smells of urine, and likely belongs to some
homeless guy, but right now there's no one else in sight. He sits there, one
knee (the cleaner one) pulled up to his chest with his arms wrapped ghtly
around it, and gasps for breath as the sweat drips off his brow and into his
eyes. He pushes up his glasses and swipes it away, but tears of pain and
fear threaten to dampen them again.

His knee is bleeding. Not only does it smell like ro ng garbage, but it hurts
like hell. It's lucky he didn't land on the nails, but who knows what bacteria
are swimming in that sludge. He hopes the scrape doesn't get infected;
he's heard horror stories of what can happen to body parts if they get
infected. Visions of hobbling to school on a crutch with a prosthe c lower
leg pop into his mind. Would that be worse than what the Stooges will do
to him if they catch him? Possibly. But possibly not.

In the distance he hears someone yelling, "I think he went this way!"

Damn it, he thinks with a sigh. Why must they be so persistent in their
desire to beat the crap out of him today? Just call it a day and scram
already. God, I just want to go home. He scrunches ghter against the
concrete and prays they don't decide to explore this par cular smelly
passageway.

Then his stomach drops as he hears the low scuffle of someone entering
the alley. With every ounce of strength he has, he pushes his en re body
into the thin space between the crumbling bricks and the metal back of the
dumpster. It's not much of a hiding spot – if they look around the dumpster
closely they'll s ll spot him – but it's the best he can do.

Man, it reeks back here. Bile rises in his throat, but he fights it back down.
He takes shallow breaths through his mouth.

"Any sign of him?" That sounds like Mike.

"Nope." Definitely Connor now. "I swear he disappeared before the Suds 'n
Save though."

"I think you need specs, too," Mike snarks. "There's nothing down there
but rats and roaches. He's too chickenshit to go that way."

"Maybe he's hidin'?" Sco y's higher pitched voice this me. Puberty hasn't
deepened Sco y's tone yet, but it squawks through every now and then.

The rough brick digs into Damon's back, dirtying and probably leaving
holes in his shirt, but he can't let himself care much right now. He hears
shuffling step coming closer, and he stops breathing altogether.
"It's kinda dark, but I don't think he's in here. He probably saw a rat and
took off."

A sharp laugh - Mike's for sure. Then silence.

Damon doesn't breathe; he doesn't move; he doesn't even blink. He begs

his racing heart to quiet down. The silence stretches out and he
understands they're right in front of the dumpster, looking and listening
like the predators they are.

Just at the exact moment he has no choice but to open his mouth a
frac on of an inch to draw in some putrid air, Mike speaks up again,
masking the faint sound of his desperate inhala on. "Li le faggot's not
here. Let's go. This place smells like shit. Fucking baby probably ran straight
out the other end and is halfway to his boyfriend's by now."

For the life of him, Damon can't understand why the Stooges equate slim,
bespectacled and smart to gay, but for some reason they do. It puzzles him,
but it doesn't offend him. Even at age twelve he's confident in his
a rac on to the fairer sex, so their insults don't hurt. Their fists, knees and
feet on the other hand…

Once the sounds of the boys leaving the alleyway fade, Damon squeezes
out from behind the dumpster and squats on the filthy blanket again.
Frustrated, he knows he has to stay here a while longer, give them me to
get on their way to wherever they've decided to head next. Possibly they're
tracing the route back to his house, looking for him along some detour
home he might have taken.

Sighing, he realizes that's probably exactly what they're doing. Mike is the
smartest of the three, and the most determined to make Damon's life
miserable. Mike will be leading them to his place. In fact, they'll probably
lie in wait for him a block or two away. Especially now they're pissed off
he's avoided them thus far.

His injured knee is throbbing, but he knows he has to wait – has to wait
them out. Just how long exactly he has no idea. Checking the silver watch
on his wrist his dad gave him for Christmas, he sees it's already a er four.

Damon sits on that pissy, ripped up blanket, presses his face between his
knees and closes his eyes. Inside, he's cursing the three bigger boys for
their infernal need to terrorize the weak. He knows it's just the way it is,
but the way it is sucks, frankly, for kids like him.

When the big hand finally gets close to the six, he thinks maybe, just
maybe, it's been long enough. He edges his back up the wall un l he's in a
standing posi on and tenta vely peeks out from behind the dumpster. The
alleyway, and sunny sidewalk beyond, is empty.

A scurrying sound from below the dumpster, however, says otherwise. He

recalls Mike's taunt about rats, and suddenly finds he's able to move
quickly a er all. He heads for the opposite end of the laneway out to
Cherry Street though, just in case.

By the me he turns onto his own street, Damon is red, dirty, bloody, and
wants nothing more than a long, hot shower. About a block away he stops
in surprise when he sees an ambulance parked in front of his house. At first
he doesn't no ce his father's Cadillac along the curb behind it.

As he watches, the big double front doors swing open and paramedics
carry out a shrouded stretcher, his father following closely. Then he sees
something he's never seen before. And never wants to see again.

His dad's face streams with tears.

Damon blames himself of course. He's pre y sure his dad blames him, too.
He was the one who was supposed to bring her the inhaler, a er all. If only
he'd made it to the pharmacy and back home when he'd been supposed
to. If only the Stooges hadn't picked today of all days to be strolling down
Washington Street and catch him daydreaming. If only Stefan hadn't been
sick and Mom could have gone to pick up it herself earlier in the day. If
only…well, he could list a million 'if onlys' but none of them will change a
damn thing. He loved her, and now she's gone.
She collapsed just before 4:00, and somehow his li le brother had
managed to find the wherewithal to call 911. The paramedics got there in
thirteen minutes, and his father arrived home in fourteen. But by then it
was already too late. They tried unsuccessfully to revive her for another
ten minutes, then called me of death at 4:24. Damon trudged in a daze up
the walkway to his weeping father and brother eleven minutes a er that,
understanding what had happened without being told.

They bury her four days later. Standing there on the grass with his father
and brother, all the rest of the mourners behind them, Damon feels like
he's having an out-of-body experience, like he's nothing more than a
spectre looking in, seeing, yet unseen. He inhales the dank smell of
recently overturned earth mixed with the tang of sickeningly sweet
flowers. It's a combina on that will always remind him of death.

He wears a s ff black suit that makes his arms and legs itch every place it
touches bare skin. Stefan clings to his hand like a lifeline and blubbers, snot
coa ng his trembling upper lip. Handing him a ssue, Damon looks away –
not at the rose-covered gleaming mahogany coffin in front of him, but up
over the trees to the fluffy cumulus clouds sca ered across the blue sky –
blue as her eyes. Just like the opening credits on 'The Simpsons', he thinks
idly. A perfect spring day. All the rest of the world is probably outside
enjoying this beau ful Saturday, oblivious to the man and two boys who
have had their en re world ripped apart. It's hardly fair, really. It should be
raining - thunderstorming, even. Bolts of lightning crashing down like the
wrath of God, himself. How dare the sun shine while they put his mother in
the ground?

Damon feels many things acutely right now: guilt and anger, isola on and
sorrow. These emo ons stab into him like needles. Yet his face is blank,
unreadable, as if he feels nothing at all.

He does not cry.

A/N I thought we needed a flashback to help understand Damon's
character a bit be er. Sorry it's so heavy, but it's important to show why he
is the man he is today.

Thank you to ALL of you who took the me to leave me reviews so far!
Reviewers are the best readers an author could have. You have no idea how
much each one means to me. Special thanks to LoveDE, kimbulay,
Anglcdmn1986 and scarle 2112 for pre-reading and giving me advice. You
guys are so loved!

Please let me know what you think of ch 3 by leaving a review in the li le

box below...it will only take a moment, and it will make me smile - isn't that
worth it? haha Have a great day!
4. Chapter 4
Chapter 4

The next morning was bright and sunny. The plows had been out before
the crack of dawn clearing away the foot or so of snow that had fallen
during the night, and the school buses were all running more or less on
schedule. Elena was pleased to find Jeremy already at the table when she
came into the kitchen to make her tea and toast.

"Good morning," she greeted him as she opened the tap to fill the ke le.

He mumbled something unintelligible through a mouthful of cereal. It may

or may not have been "Morning."

Popping two slices of toast into the toaster, she turned to face him, leaning
back against the counter. A flash of red caught her eye as she no ced a
card stuck to the front of the fridge. Curious, she reached over and tugged
it out from under the eagle-shaped magnet. It was an invita on to the
Lockwood's annual Valen ne's Day bash a week from Saturday. Formal
dress was required. Since the Gilberts were a founding family, so was their
presence. She made a mental note to ask Bonnie if she could fill in at the
Clutch that night.

Elena returned her a en on to her brother. Rubbing her bicep through her
sweater and fake-wincing a li le, she said, "I bruised my arm up pre y
good last night - stumbled and fell into the edge of the counter as I was
cleaning."

Jeremy's eyes li ed to hers. "You okay?"

"Yeah, fine. Just a klutz." The ke le whistled and she swiveled to unplug it
and pour boiling water over her teabag. Once her toast was spread with
honey, Elena sat down across from him. His cereal was nearly gone. Since
he hadn't offered anything else a er she'd told him about her injury, she
decided to press on.
"So I ran into Vickie in the girl's change room yesterday. She seemed to be
favoring the same arm I just hurt. Did she happen to say what she did to
it?"

He looked at her again, clearly confused. "No. Why would she?"

"Oh you know…you guys seem close lately. I thought she might've
men oned it or something."

His eyes narrowed. "Why are you asking me this, Elena?"

With a shrug, she replied, "I just wondered." She took a sip of her tea and
picked up her phone, trying to appear nonchalant. As she looked through
her messages, she flee ngly wished she'd thought to ask for Damon's
number so she could text him to make sure he got home safely last night.
When she saw him next she'd have to remember to get his digits.

"You sure? You sure her arm was sore?" Her brother looked worried and it
just further confirmed her suspicions of his growing feelings for Vickie.

While Elena might leave out some details, she wasn't going to lie to him.
"Yes, I'm very sure."

"That asshole be er not have…" Jeremy said it low, almost to himself. His
eyes were fixed on the bo om of his now-empty bowl. Though most of the
me she'd rather not know exactly what her brother was thinking, at the
moment Elena wished she could read his mind.

"Jer?" His eyes li ed to hers again. "Do you think Tyler would do that? Get
rough with a girl? Has it happened with others?"

Jeremy stood up abruptly and sighed. "Maybe." He shrugged. "I dunno. I've
heard a few things. Can't see Vick pu ng up with that shit, though. She'd
tell him to fuck right off if he ever tried."

"Okay," Elena said, le ng the ma er drop. She wasn't going to push this
topic right now and risk riling him up further. He'd already given her
something to go on. Tyler had le a slew of cast-offs in his three and a half
years at Mys c Falls high, but the next person she thought might be worth
talking to was his only serious rela onship she was aware of - his ex-
girlfriend Caroline.

A senior like Elena, Bonnie and Tyler, Caroline Forbes was blonde and
bubbly. She was also very popular. Elena knew her well enough to say 'hey',
but they didn't exactly move in the same social circles. The rich kids mostly
hung out with other rich kids, which she and her friends most definitely
were not. Caroline was also the head cheerleader for the second year in a
row, which had made her a perfect match for the football team captain.
Caroline and Tyler had dated for most of eleventh grade, but split up
some me over the past summer. Elena had no idea why; she'd never had
reason to care one way or the other, so had never asked. Now she
suspected it might be worthwhile to do some digging.

When Elena got onto the bus, she recounted her breakfast conversa on
with her brother to Bonnie in a rapid whisper, and asked her what she
thought about finding out more about Caroline's former rela onship with
Tyler.

Bonnie agreed it couldn't hurt to ask around. She also decided to see what
she could unearth about the rumors Tyler had go en rough with Amber
prior to da ng Vickie. Although he was the school's Golden Boy, they
figured if there was a nasty side to him someone would let something slip
at some point.

Elena had English with Caroline second period, but they didn't sit near
each other. When the lunch bell rang and the rest of the kids surged for the
door, Elena lingered, falling into step beside the taller blonde girl near the
back of the throng.

Caroline glanced at her curiously. "Hey Elena. How's things?"

"Things are…interes ng."

Caroline gave her a perplexed look and Elena flushed. She decided to move
things along. "Are you going to the Valen ne's party at Tyler's next
weekend?" she asked casually. Of course she already knew Caroline
wouldn't miss it, but it was as good an opening as any.

That brought a smile and a slight eye roll. "Of course. I have to be there,
same as you do."

Hoping to capitalize on the we're-both-stuck-doing-this-thing camaraderie,

Elena's voice dropped to a near-whisper. "Would you skip it if you could?
Cause I sure would."

The other girl's grin faltered. "Spending my Saturday night at the

Lockwood's having to see my ex all cozy with his new girlfriend isn't exactly
my idea of a fabulous me. I'd rather be at the movies with Jessie. But I'll
drag him along for an hour or two to put in my appearance, and then we'll
split. It won't be so bad if I have my own arm candy." She paused,
examining Elena closer. "You hate those things, don't you?"

The corner of Elena's mouth quirked up in half-smile. "Pre y much," she

admi ed. She glanced around to see if anyone was near enough to
overhear them. At the moment no one was, so she lted her head closer to
Caroline's. "Look, I know we're not exactly BFFs, but can I ask you
something?"

One perfectly shaped brow arched, but Caroline nodded.

"Was your break-up with Tyler…um…amicable? Or…?"

"Amicable? You mean like are we s ll friends?"

"I mean…was it…did it get…ugly? At the me?" Elena gulped and looked
down at her books. "I'm sorry, Care. I know it's none of my business. I just
heard some rumors…"

Caroline grabbed her by the shoulder and pulled her into an empty corner
by a row of lockers. "You heard rumors? About things ge ng ugly between
Ty and me? Who told you that?" Her deep blue eyes flashed, but Elena
couldn't read the emo on behind them.

Elena cheeks began to burn. "No. Well, yes, but not about you and Tyler. I
heard he some mes…has a temper. With other girls. Your name never
came up, honest. But you were the only one I felt like I could ask."

Whoever coined the phrase 'fla ery will get you nowhere' had obviously
never met Caroline Forbes. At that last sentence, her smile resurfaced and
she dropped her hand from Elena's arm. Then she shrugged. "I don't know
about the other skanks who've been throwing themselves at him, but
between us? Sure, he has a temper, but he never got handsy with me. I've
got a temper too, and Ty knew be er than to ever lay a finger on me…if I
didn't want him to. Our fights were rare, but explosive - and always ended
in amazing make-up sex. So I wasn't complaining." The expression on her
face had morphed into one of fond remembrance and Elena grew more
uncomfortable. She was just about to make an excuse and head off for
lunch when Caroline asked, "Who was it? Who said he got rough with
them? Was it that li le bitch Amber?"

Elena tucked a strand of hair behind one ear and pulled her books against
her chest. "I don't know. It was just some stupid rumor. Probably started by
someone who was jealous of either Tyler or the girl he was with at the
me."

Caroline's laugh burst out of her like a mini-erup on in the now quiet
hallway, and she clapped hand over her mouth. "Probably," she agreed,
before heading off in the direc on of the stairwell.

When Elena opened her locker to retrieve her bagged lunch, she realized
she'd never once said that anyone had implied Tyler had go en rough with
a girl, but Caroline had jumped to that interes ng and possibly telling
conclusion anyway.

It was another quiet night at the Coffee Clutch. On dark winter evenings
the residents of Mys c Falls tended to hibernate in their own homes
instead of being out and about - not that Elena could blame them. By 8:30
she was alone, with another hour and a half stretching out in front of her
un l she could close up. She reached into her knapsack and pulled out the
small bundle of envelopes she'd picked up from her editor on her way to
work earlier. Time to choose a few ques ons for her column.

There were only five le ers, plus an addi onal six e-mails wai ng in her
Miss Lonely Love Gmail inbox – a slow week for sure. Elena read them over
one by one. She had selected two e-mails and one le er for her column,
and two more she felt deserved a private response when she came to the
last envelope in the stack. The jagged handwri ng on the front looked
familiar, but no return address was scrawled in the upper le corner.
Curious, she tore the end from the envelope and pulled out the contents.

Elena scanned the page, realizing with surprise that it was from the same
guy who'd wri en to her before, the one whose girlfriend had cheated on
him with his brother. While she did some mes get replies to her personal
responses over e-mail, most of them also thanking her like this one, it was
pre y rare to get a handwri en le er back, especially from a man. As she
read it, she smiled. Folding it carefully back into its envelope, she slid it
inside her bag.

She spent the next hour replying to the ques ons and forma ng her
column, then reading over what she'd wri en, revising a few sentences
here and there before forwarding it to her editor. When it was at last me
to go home, she felt accomplished, although the sound of the wind gus ng
against the shop windows brought with it a sense of interminable
loneliness. She'd been half wishing Damon might make an appearance
tonight, and a part of her she wasn't sure she was all that pleased with was
disappointed he hadn't.

Later, when Elena was in her flannel jammies and snug in bed, she began
re-reading the final chapter of The Great Gatsby. Before she got two pages
in, the thought of JAI's second le er popped into her head and she put the
book down mid-sentence. With a so sigh, she got out of bed and began to
rummage around in the bo om drawer of her dresser un l she found the
envelope. Then she retrieved the most recent le er from the bo om of
her knapsack and, si ng cross-legged on the floor, read them both over.

Normally she didn't keep Miss Lonely Love queries for very long a er she'd
answered them – she had neither the space nor the inclina on. But
something about JAI's le ers were different, although she couldn't say
exactly why. She hadn't wri en back to the second, and had no real plans
to, but she didn't want to toss them out either. Instead she tucked them
both into the back of an old but well-loved hardcover on her bookshelf and
returned to bed.

The persistent wind ra led the small window in her room and she pulled
the blankets up ghter around herself. Much as she tried to immerse her
mind in the tragic conclusion of Gatsby, she just couldn't concentrate.
Though her father was in the next room, though her best friend was only a
text or call away, Elena felt very alone.

Damon was day-drinking. He knew it wasn't the smartest idea in the world,
but even the fire raging behind the grate in the library couldn't warm him
up, and he had no inclina on to leave the boarding house today. So he
poured another two fingers of bourbon and listened to the wind gust
under the eaves as the flames crackled in the corner.

On the table beside him his phone beeped again, and he glared at it,
willing it with his mind to shut the fuck up. He didn't even pick it up to see
who the text was from. He already knew.

Stefan. It was always Stefan. And the words were nearly always the same.

I'm so sorry. I hope you can forgive me someday.

I'm worried about you, Damon.

Please answer your phone. I need to talk to you.

It was con nually one variance or another of those three. Damon never
acknowledged them, but he didn't block his brother's number either.
Stefan was a persistent li le bugger – he'd just use someone else's phone if
he had to. Probably hers. And frankly, Damon couldn't be bothered to
make the effort.

When the beeping finally stopped, he picked up his glass from where it sat
beside the offensive phone and downed the liquid within, relishing the
angry burn as it coated his throat. He slammed the tumbler back onto the
oak with a sigh.

"Careful with the crystal, dude. That glass is older than you are."

He looked up as his uncle came into the room. Zach held a cordless phone
in his right hand and Damon eyed it with suspicion. He hadn't even heard
the usually loud boarding house phone ring.

Zach walked over and held it out to him wordlessly. With another sigh,
Damon set his book down beside the now-empty glass and now-silent cell
phone and, grimacing, took the receiver. He knew it was either his brother
or his father on the other end, and since his cell had just beeped a minute
ago, all his money was on Stefan.

He didn't put it to his ear, just clutched it ghtly. The plas c casing was
warm – to Damon unpleasantly so.

Zach arched a brow, staring at him intently. "You gonna talk to him?"

Damon's shoulders rose in the smallest of shrugs.

His uncle gave him a ght smile. "You can't avoid it forever. You're brothers;
someday you'll have to talk again. Today might as well be that day."

Damon's frown was his only response. Zach gave him an encouraging nod
before leaving the room.
He stared at that damn hunk of plas c and wires in his hand for a while
longer. Then, mentally bracing himself, he put it against his ear. He was
nowhere near drunk enough for this conversa on.

"Yeah?" he mu ered, taking off his glasses and se ng them atop his book.

"Damon?"

"In the flesh."

"Thank God. I've been trying to reach you for weeks! How are you?"

"Alive." And far too sober at the moment.

"Good to know." He heard his brother blow out a puff of air. "Why
wouldn't you at least text me back? Tell me you're okay? Tell me to fuck
off? Anything, really. I was worried about you."

Damon didn't reply. Instead he leaned over and poured more bourbon into
his glass.

There was a sigh from the other end of the phone. "Okay, okay. I guess I
know the answer to that. Glad you finally decided to talk to me."

"Not sure I have." He rubbed his forehead with his fingers, briefly closing
his eyes.

"Ah. Well, maybe you'll just listen then. I know I fucked up, and there aren't
enough words to express how sorry I am about that. I never meant to hurt
you."

Damon chuckled so ly. "Right."

"It's true - just hear me out. It never should have happened the way it did,
and I'll regret that bit for the rest of my life, but I don't…I can't regret being
with her. I just…I fell in love, Damon. Even though she was with you, and I
knew you were in love with her, and that she was off-limits, I fell for her. I
felt incredibly guilty for ac ng on something I knew would cause you so
much pain, but…"

"You fell in love with her? Was that before or a er you started fucking her
behind my back?"

The wind gusted again, nearly drowning out another sigh from Stefan. "I
deserve that."

Damon took a sip of bourbon. Rolling his eyes, he said, "So not what you
deserve."

"It was before. We fell in love before we ever touched each other. Once it
started, we agreed she needed to end things with you before we could
con nue. She promised she would, but she knew that conversa on was
gonna be ugly and painful, so she avoided it. And we just couldn't stay
away from each other. And everything just got so goddamn complicated,
because we both love you and didn't want to hurt you, but knew it was
inevitable."

His fingers ghtened on the glass and Damon had to force himself to take a
deep breath and relax them. Pu ng it to his lips, he swallowed the rest of
the liquor in one gulp, savoring the burn all the way to the pit of his
stomach. It was duller than before now that his blood-alcohol level had
risen a bit. Nowhere near enough though.

"Are you done?" he asked tersely.

A third sigh. Damon could just picture his brother's brow all furrowed with
frustra on. Stefan was only nineteen, but he could brood like no one's
business. As if he had any right or reason to.

"I'm done. I just needed to tell you again how sorry I am."

"Let me sum up for you, just to make sure I've got this straight. You called
to tell me you're sorry, but not all that sorry, because you and Katherine
are in looove and intend to ride off into the sunset and have fat babies
some day?" Acid dripped from every word.

Stefan sighed yet again. This conversa on obviously wasn't going the way
he'd hoped. Perhaps he'd thought Damon would say, 'Oh, you're love with
the love of my life? Oh, well that changes everything! In that case I forgive
you for stabbing me in the back and wish you a life me of happiness
together.' Not fucking likely.

"All right, Damon. No need to be an asshole. You're not ready for forgiving
and forge ng yet - I get that."

"Do you, Stef? Cause I really don't think you do."

"I do love her, more than I've ever loved anyone. And we're happy
together. And I hope someday you can find it in yourself to be happy for
me, just because I'm your brother and, whether you're willing to admit it
or not, I know you s ll care."

Damon chuckled, low and completely mirthless. "Uh huh. Thanks for
calling."

"Damon…"

He hung up without wai ng to hear any more, fury boiling through every
vein and artery. Without a single thought, he whipped the phone across
the room. Luckily his aim was true and it landed on one of the wingchairs
near the tall windows instead of sha ering on the hardwood. His uncle
would've been pissed if he'd broken the phone in a fit of rage.

His gaze landed on the half-empty bo le of Maker's Mark on the table, the
firelight sending dancing glimmers along the glass. It beckoned to him
mercilessly. He reached for it, then stopped, his fingers frozen in mid-air for
a few long moments. Finally he let his hand drop. In the mood he was in,
he knew it wouldn't be the smartest idea in the world to get rip-roaring
drunk. Zach wouldn't want his tumblers - or anything else in here, including
his nephew – smashed to bits.
Damon le his cell phone and book on the table and instead went down to
the gym. The red punching bag in the corner taunted him, and he pictured
his brother's face on the side. As he began to pound it, Stefan's features
morphed into Katherine's and he found his fists slamming into the leather
even harder. He beat the crap out of it un l his knuckles, wrists and
shoulders were sore and sweat ran in rivulets down his face. When he
could barely stand on his own two feet any longer, he dragged himself up
to his room to shower, his mind now nearly as numb as his hands.

Elena moved quickly but gracefully as she navigated her way through the
Friday night rush topping up mugs, placing plates of pastries in front of
customers and ringing up their orders on the cash register. The hours
slipped away unno ced and before she knew it, it was a er 10:30.

She had her back turned as old Mr. Donnelly le , so didn't no ce someone
else had entered at the same me un l she heard footsteps approaching
the counter. Whirling, she found herself face to face with a smirking
Damon, his eyes twinkling mischievously behind his glasses, which were
fogging over from the abrupt temperature change of coming indoors.

He took them off and began to polish them on his scarf tail as he greeted
her. "How's your night been? Seems I picked the right me to pop by."

A thin layer of untended scruff covered his cheeks and chin, obscuring the
boyishness from his features. As he looked her over, warm ngles radiated
through her. Damon certainly wasn't like any other guy in Mys c Falls, that
was for sure. Outwardly he looked like a male model, yet Elena could tell
he carried some weary weight within.

She returned his smile. "Busy, but good. Glad the rush seems to be over.
Coffee?"

Retrieving his mug from his coat pocket, he set it on the counter for her to
fill, then doffed his coat and hat and folded them over a stool. She was
pleased to note it looked like he intended to stay for a while.
"So how's your week been?" Elena sat down behind the counter, swiveling
her body to face him.

His forehead creased with a momentary frown. "Shit, mostly. You?"

"Just busy with the usual – school and work and schoolwork." She didn't
men on the Vickie thing. Damon didn't know any of the people involved,
but it s ll felt too personal – not to men on as yet unsubstan ated - to
share with outsiders. "Why was your week shit? If you don't mind me
asking."

He sighed. "Got into a…heated…discussion with my brother last night. Let's

just say he and I don't exactly see eye to eye."

Elena could tell by his expression that there was a lot more to it than just a
random argument with a sibling. She and Jeremy got into spats all the
me, but they rarely ruined her day, let alone several of them. "You said
he's at U. of V. Which campus? Richmond?"

"We're from Richmond, but no. He's up in Charlo esville ' l the end of
April. That's where the law school is, and where our father graduated."

"Right, okay. So you won't see him again un l Spring Break next month?"

Damon shook his head with a sardonic half-smile. "Hopefully not even
then. We're not close...not anymore."

"Oh. Is that why you le ?" She wasn't sure she should pry, but the words
just spilled out of her mouth anyway.

His eyes li ed, looking at her over the top of the dark plas c frame of his
glasses, and her heartbeat sped up. At first Elena didn't think he would
answer, instead just stare her down un l she retracted the ques on.

"Par ally," Damon said at last. He didn't offer anything more and, though
he seemed a bit troubled, she decided not to push it. They were s ll just
ge ng to know one another a er all. And it wasn't like she'd blurted out
all her deep family secrets to him already, either. But she did find herself
hoping he might someday feel comfortable enough to speak of his past. It
obviously contained some deep unpleasantness he was a emp ng to
distance himself from.

So instead, she switched their topic of conversa on to her English essay.

Elena jo ed down her outline as they discussed how Gatsby's obsession
with his overly idealized mental image of the Daisy from his past made him
blind to the Daisy of the moment, and who she truly was. Damon dropped
a couple of sarcas c remarks about an ex-girlfriend here and there, but
Elena didn't ask about her, either. If he felt like he wanted to share this
stuff at some point, he would. Right now she knew it was none of her
business.

He stayed un l close, and once again offered to drive her home. This me
she accepted without hesita on. The night was clear and frigid, and other
than scraping a layer of frost from the windshield, no snow clearing was
required, so there was no repeat of their snow ba le. Damon s ll seemed
tense; he didn't chat much on the short drive and Elena found herself
missing his playfulness and those twinkles in the corners of his eyes that
proved he was happy.

When they pulled up in front of her house, she turned to face him and he
regarded her curiously. Flushing, she grabbed her phone from her bag and
held it out.

He looked down at it. "Thanks, but I've already got one," he said dryly,
maintaining a straight face.

Elena couldn't help giggling. "I know! Can you put your number into mine?
That way I can text you to make sure you got home safely. I wanted to the
other night during the snowstorm, but couldn't."

A smile broke through and it brightened Damon's en re countenance.

Elena felt herself relax a li le at the sight of it. His fingers brushed hers as
he took her phone and wordlessly tapped the screen for a few moments
before handing it back.
"Thanks. I'll text you when I get inside so you have mine, too."

He nodded, staring at her with an undecipherable expression.

Elena's gaze dropped to his lips. They were full, and looked so . She
wondered idly what kissing him would be like. Would he be gentle and
sweet? Or intense and passionate? If she were a be ng woman, she'd put
her money on the la er, but truthfully she figured it could go either way.
Maybe someday she'd find out…

No.

Let's put a stop to that train of thought right now, she chas sed herself.
Elena knew she needed to focus on her studies and her family du es for
the next five months and then hopefully in August she'd be moving away
for college. Ge ng involved with someone would just…add complica ons.
Complica ons she didn't want.

"Goodnight, Damon," she told him, pushing open the door and stepping
onto the hard-packed snow.

Before she closed it behind her, she heard him mumble, "Night" back, but
it was so and distracted, as if his mind was a million miles away.
Considering his general demeanor this evening, she supposed it probably
was. Because of the conversa on with his brother? She had no idea.

Elena gave him a wave, and headed into the house.

His sky blue eyes are all she can see; they fill up her en re field of vision.
They're so beau ful, yet so dangerous. She knows she could drown in them
if she isn't careful.

She feels him place her phone into her hand, but she doesn't look down at
it. She can't look down, even if she wanted to. Her eyes are locked – no,
trapped – with his, like a cornered rabbit, frozen with fear, wai ng for the
fox to pounce.
Only…that's not quite right, is it? She's not a rabbit; he's not a fox. But she's
terrified he'll eat her alive anyway. Body, mind and soul. God, those eyes…

She finally breaks their connec on and her gaze falls lower, to his lips.
They're so…so plump! And rosy. She wants to nibble them like an apple, and
she bets they'd taste just as sweet.

Li ing her eyes to his again, she feels all his intensity radia ng toward her,
crossing the scant few inches s ll separa ng them. He's just filled with so
much life! She wants to touch him, to share in some of that vitality. She
needs it, even. Her eyelids flu er closed. She presses forward just a li le...

And then, just like that, she's…no, wait…he's…they're…they're kissing. His

lips are even so er than she'd imagined. So , yet insistent; gentle, yet
demanding. She feels his warm fingers slide up her neck to tangle in the
back of her hair, l ng her head slightly so he can angle his mouth over
hers and deepen the kiss.

Elena's eyelids flu ered and she woke with a gasp in the dark. It took her a
few long seconds for awareness to sink in, to realize she was lying in bed
wrapped up snug in her sheets instead of ensconced in Damon's arms in
his Jeep. Disappointment and frustra on surged through her. She could s ll
feel his mouth on hers, and as she pressed her fingers to her lips she was
overcome by an acute sense of loss.

Pushing the covers back reluctantly, she got up and went to the bathroom.
When she returned into the warm comfort of her bed, she tried to recall
the dream, but much of it had already faded, as dreams so o en do.

Before falling back to sleep, she again touched her lips and tried to
remember what kissing him had felt like. She couldn't quite get there,
though. All that came back was an impression of comfort and safety. And
then emp ness. Loneliness.

Once the cold light of tomorrow arrived, she knew she would undoubtedly
feel differently. But right now, in that dream muddled fog of lazy half-
awareness that only occurs in the wee hours before dawn, she wished
desperately that Damon was lying here beside her.

A/N Thanks so much to scarle 2112 for pre-reading and to every one of
you who has le me a review! Hope you liked this chapter. Please let me
know your thoughts in the li le box below - it would mean a lot to me!
5. Chapter 5
Chapter 5

Over the weekend Elena spent what rare free moments she had trying very
hard not to think about Friday night's dream. It worked fine when she kept
busy, but while she lay in bed un l the wee hours of Saturday night with
her eyes squeezed ghtly shut, unable to sleep even though every muscle
in her body felt dead red, visions of Damon's intense eyes - and even
more intense lips - refused to be shut down, insis ng on haun ng her no
ma er how hard she tried to think of other things.

A er church with her dad on Sunday, she spent the a ernoon doing
homework and filling out scholarship applica ons online. There hadn't
been any new informa on or clues about Vickie and Tyler, so she pushed
that issue to the back of her mind so she could concentrate on more
pressing ma ers.

Most of Monday was hec c. Elena felt like she did nothing but rush from
the me she dragged herself from bed to the me she got to work.
Walking into the Clutch at 5:25, throwing her knapsack behind the counter
and giving her dad a hug before he headed home – it all felt like a massive
relief. Now all she had to do was finish the last thousand words or so of her
Gatsby essay and she would end the day feeling at least a small sense of
accomplishment.

There were several customers hanging out, and a few more came in to pick
up take-out sandwiches and pastries on their way home from work, but by
the me 7:30 rolled around, it was just Elena and the town postmaster
Bart Kimble cha ng at the counter. And he was sipping the last of his
coffee and ge ng ready to head home.

The bell nkled over the door and she looked up, flushing and smiling
simultaneously as she saw who was coming in. Outside it was snowing, and
as Damon stepped into the warmth of the shop he removed his wool cap
and shook it off, sending a flurry of snowflakes dri ing to the rubber mat
beneath his boots. He looked up and met her eyes, echoing her grin back
at her before walking over and joining them. Elena had the coffee pot in
her hand and ready before he even had a chance to pull his travel mug
from his jacket.

"Is it fresh tonight?" he asked teasingly.

"Oh, you wanted fresh? I think this one's from this morning." Elena swirled
the black liquid against the glass and examined it skep cally. Turning back
to Damon, she gave him a wink when she took in the incredulous
expression on his face. "Kidding!" she assured him, pulled his mug closer
and filling it.

He laughed, and she realized she hadn't heard him laugh since their snow
fight a week ago. She liked the sound of it, and secretly hoped it meant he
was in a be er mood tonight

As Damon sat down, Mr. Kimble stood up and wished them both a good
evening. Once it was just the two of them in the coffee shop, Elena tried to
relax and act natural. And not think about her dream. Or look at his lips.

She opened her laptop to the outline of her essay they'd worked up
together the week before. It gave her something to focus on other than his
face. In the spirit of ac ng normal, she asked, "How was your weekend?"

Damon shrugged. "I got through two books."

"Really? Did you do anything besides read?"

"Watched a few movies on Ne lix. Worked out. Played chess with my

uncle. Nothing too even ul." As he li ed his coffee and sipped, steam
fogged his glasses. He took them off and set them on the counter, before
looking up at her through long dark lashes. "What about you?"

"Worked. Studied. In case you haven't already guessed by now, my life is

pre y boring." That gave Elena a sudden inspira on. Throwing cau on to
the wind, she blurted, "Would you happen to be free this Saturday night?"

Brows rising in curiosity, he replied, "I'm always free these days. Why?
What did you have in mind?"

Elena debated for a second whether this was a great idea or a stupid one,
then decided to just go with it. "Wanna come with me to the Lockwood's
Valen ne's party?"

His eyes flared. That was clearly not what he'd expected her to say.
"Who're the Lockwoods?"

She explained about the mayor's many events and how Mys c Falls
founding families were expected to a end if they were capable of walking
upright. "I hate those kinds of things, but I have to go. It'd be a lot less
tedious if you came along."

"So you want me to keep you amused?" He chuckled. "Would I have to

dress up?"

With a playful grin, she replied, "Yep and yep. That okay?"

Damon frowned, turning his head to study the falling snow outside the big
plate-glass windows. Elena sensed he wasn't fully comfortable with the
idea and felt a sudden urge to retract the invita on, but didn't know how
to do it without making things more awkward.

"Just as friends, if that makes you feel any be er," she added lamely,
wondering if she'd end up regre ng she'd asked.

He looked back at her and for a moment she was lost in a sea of blue. One
corner of his mouth quirked up into a lopsided smile. "Hey, it's not like I
have anything else going on."

"Is that a 'yes', then?" Elena asked, feeling a spark of hope bloom.
"Sure, why not. Sounds like a good reason to clean up nice. Free booze?"
She nodded, smiling. "Cool. You can point out any interes ng people and
fill me in on the gossip. Should be entertaining."

Elena flinched at the word 'gossip', but he didn't seem to no ce. She
reminded herself that he had no idea how many of the town's secrets she
actually knew.

Damon again stayed un l close. When she was busy with customers or
cleaning, he read his book, and when she had me to sit and do homework
or chat, he kept her company. It didn't take long for Elena to relax
completely and return to feeling at ease around him. A er she locked up,
she walked with him to his Jeep, this me not even wai ng for him to offer
to drive her home. It was coated with an inch or two of snow.

They looked at the vehicle, then at one another and grinned. Before she
could react, Damon dashed over to it, slid a gloved hand up the windshield
and threw snow at her.

She gasped as cold clumps trickled down her cheeks. Then she started to
giggle. "You're in so much trouble now, mister!" she shouted, scooping up
her own handful and lobbing it his way. He dodged, and she missed, but
that was how the Second Great Snow War of 2014 began.

Running around to the other side of the Jeep, Damon used it for cover as
he pushed an armful of snow off the roof and sent it toward her in a spray.
Elena heard him laugh loudly as she whipped around so it hit her back
instead of her face. She swore – and delivered – revenge, but couldn't
suppress the massive smile on her face.

By the me they paused for a breath, she was laughing so hard tears rose
to the corners of her eyes. Her face, hat and gloves were soaked and they
were both covered in blotches of white, although the windows of the Jeep
were far from clear.

Damon reached over and swiped a finger across the top of her cheek. "You
have a li le something on your face," he told her, grinning.
"Oh really? Cause you look like the Abominable-frickin-Snowman!"

The glow from the streetlight overhead reflected off all the white and
made his eyes twinkle. "Well, we are in the mountains. Or nearly, anyway. I
should fit right in." He pulled off his cap and shook it off for the second
me that night, his glasses spo ed with droplets of mel ng snow.

"Guess we'll have to lay the blanket down again," Elena said, tugging open
the passenger door. She pulled it from the backseat and spread it across
the front ones, like Damon had done the week prior. He traded her his keys
for a snowbrush, and she started the engine. Her fingers numb, she peeled
off her wet gloves and rubbed her hands together in front of the vent,
although it was too soon for them to be blowing any warmth.

Damon climbed inside a minute later. "Brrr," he mu ered, pulling away

from the curb. "Never had this much snow back home. I think I'll need to
buy a parka if I'm gonna s ck around here for the rest of the winter."

Elena looked at him in surprise. "You're thinking of leaving?"

He shot her a glance before returning his focus out the windshield.
Shrugging, he replied, "Let's just say I'm keeping my op ons open."

She sat on her fingers to try to warm them up, and didn't say anything else
un l they'd stopped in front of her house. Shivers wracked her small frame
from the damp cold. She couldn't wait to get into her cozy pajamas and
even cozier bed.

Once he put the Jeep in park and turned toward her, she said, "Can I ask
you something?"

"You just did," he smirked.

Ignoring his smartass reply, Elena con nued. "When you decide to move
on to bigger and be er things, would you let me know? So I don't worry if
you stop coming by the shop?"
Damon's eyes widened. He turned away and began fiddling with his gloves.
"Sure," he mumbled. His moods were so changeable - they nearly gave her
whiplash.

"But you'll come to the party?" she pressed.

He li ed his head to look back at her with a small smile. "I said I would, and
I'm a man of my word. Besides, it might be fun. And you do make pre y
good company."

Elena's face grew hot, which was a welcome respite from the chill that s ll
permeated the interior of the Jeep. The short drive to her house hadn't
been enough me for the engine to warm up much.

"You're not so bad yourself."

He stared at her, but the emo ons swirling behind those icy blue eyes were
undecipherable. She grabbed her knapsack off the floor and put her fingers
on the door handle. "Thanks for the li , Damon. Please text me when you
get in."

"Goodnight," he told her so ly.

The door crunched closed behind her and she forced herself not to look
back as she hurried up the walkway. Once she'd unlocked the front door,
she heard him pull away from the curb, wai ng before leaving to make
sure she got safely inside, as he always did.

Her dad sat on the couch in the small living room watching the news.
Paperwork and file folders were strewn across the coffee table underneath
his slippered feet. Elena came in and sat with him for a few minutes, telling
him about her day. When she men oned she had a date for the upcoming
Valen ne's party, he turned his face to look at her directly, eyebrows
raised. "Was that his car you just got out of?"

"Yes, Damon comes into the shop some nights and keeps me company.
He's given me a li home a few mes."
"Thought you said you didn't want a boyfriend?" He smiled at his daughter,
casual teasing on the surface, all concerned father underneath.

"I s ll don't. It's not that kind of a date," she assured him quickly. "He's just
a friend. Zach Salvatore's nephew – have you met him yet?"

Grayson shook his head. "Guess I'll meet him Saturday."

"Guess you will. If he doesn't back out on me." She sighed, thinking of
Damon's mood swings.

"No guy in their right mind would leave you high and dry, swee e."

Elena laughed. "Thanks, Daddy. You always know just what I need to hear."
She gave him a kiss on the cheek and headed down the hallway.

When she was ready for bed, she opened her laptop and finished typing
out the final few paragraphs for her English essay – Damon's presence had
been kind of distrac ng so she hadn't quite go en her first dra done
earlier. Tomorrow evening at work she'd read it over and revise as needed.

Sa sfied, Elena tucked the computer into her knapsack and turned out the
light. As she lay there, she remembered her earlier instruc ons to him. She
reached out blindly and fumbled for her phone on the nightstand. There
was one new text, and it was from Damon.

Home safe and sound. You le your gloves in my car. Want me to bring
them over in the morning?

Though the idea of him showing up at her door before school - not to
men on the possibility of ge ng a ride and skipping the bus - made her
want to take him up on the offer, she forced herself to reply, That's ok. I've
got another pair. I'll get them from you later.

In less than a minute another text arrived: How formal is this party? Tux?
Jacket and e? Bu on-up and dress pants?
She smiled. The image of Damon in a tuxedo was definitely appealing, but
she figured he would have to go rent one, and it wasn't necessary.

The last op on is fine. See you Saturday. Can you pick me up at 7? Or just
meet there?

I'll be over at 7. Night.

Elena returned her phone to the dresser and rolled onto her back. Her
body felt red, but her brain refused to shut off. The rest of the house was
quiet – so quiet she could hear the cking of the clock on the mantle out in
the living room and the so chugging sounds of the fridge in the kitchen.

She tossed and turned, knowing full well why she was so restless. She had
a date Saturday night with the most a rac ve guy she'd ever met – a guy
who, under different circumstances, might even be actual boyfriend
material, yet she couldn't even let herself be excited about it. There was no
hope of a future there. He was clearly not interested in her that way. And
even if he had been, she absolutely did not want a rela onship right now.

It was easy to keep telling herself that, and easy to say aloud to others, but
in the silent blackness of night when she was alone with only her
overac ve mind to keep her company, it was ge ng more and more
difficult to accept.

A er school a few days later, Elena was bopping around her room listening
to music and ge ng ready for work, wondering if Damon might come by
tonight, when she heard a light knock on her door. Her brother poked his
head around the side of it. "Hey, can I come in for a minute?"

"Sure." She waved him forward.

He only took a step inside, clearly not intending to stay for long. Running
his fingers through his hair, he looked at her uncertainly. "Um, so I was
talking to Vickie on the bus home…"
"As usual," Elena said with a smile, examining her reflec on in the mirror
over her dresser as she brushed her dark hair up into a ponytail.

"Yeah. So…she was in a real bitch today. Told me she and Ty got into a huge
fight last night."

Elena looked back at him. "Oh yeah? Did they split?"

Jeremy rolled his eyes. "Not yet, no. Hope she dumps his ass soon though.
She says he can be a real dick when he's angry."

"Did she say anything else?" Elena asked, frowning. She wondered if Vickie
had any new bruises. Not that she had any way to find out, short of asking
her directly, which she wasn't about to do.

"Nope." He started to leave the room.

"Jer, wait."

Her brother turned back to her, brows raised in curiosity.

"You going to the Valen ne's party Saturday night?"

"Unless I can convincingly fake the flu." Jeremy smiled ruefully. Neither of
them par cularly enjoyed hanging out at the Lockwood mansion, no
ma er what the occasion.

"Good luck with that," Elena laughed. "I think we should keep our eyes and
ears peeled while we're there."

"For what exactly?"

She shrugged. "I don't know…just…keep a watch on Tyler. And Vickie."

"You s ll think he hurt her?" Jeremy obviously didn't want to believe it, but
the thought it might be true pissed him off.
"I don't know. I hope not. And I know it's technically none of our business
even if he does, if she refuses to put a stop to it. But…I hate the idea of any
guy thinking he has the right to control or abuse a woman." Elena paused,
looking her brother right in the eyes, making sure he was paying a en on
to her words. "I want to make sure that's not what's going on here. And if it
is, we need to help Vickie end it."

"Couldn't agree more." He flashed her a ght smile before walking out.

Once the coffee shop slowed down on Thursday night, Elena was glad to
take advantage of the lull. By the me the last hour of her shi quietly
rolled around, she'd put the finishing touches on her English essay, e-
mailed it to her teacher, and closed the document. A sense of pleasure
always came along with a job well done, and she knew she'd wri en a
great essay – hopefully even an A+ essay.

Turning her a en on to her column, she clicked open her Gmail account to
see what this week's inquiries looked like. She found two messages she
could answer in the paper, one that she would reply to privately and this
one:

Dear Miss Lonely Love,

My issue is a bit personal, but my bff says you some mes answer ques ons
privately, so I figured it didn't hurt to try. I know I could Google it, but we
only have one computer at home and it's shared with my brother and my
parents, so I don't want them to find out I'm looking up this stuff. I'm too
embarrassed to ask my friends or they'll think I'm more of a loser than they
already do. So I'm asking you.

Wow, this is hard to put into words. Ok, here goes. I recently started having
sex with my boyfriend. I knew it would hurt at first - and it totally did - but
we've done it four mes now, and it s ll hasn't go en any be er. It's
uncomfortable for me, s ll kind of painful and I don't get much out of it. All
my friends who've done it say it's supposed to feel good and be oh so
amazing and stuff, but for me it's not. Luckily it doesn't last very long, and
my boyfriend seems to really enjoy it, so I keep trying for him.

My ques on is: what am I doing wrong? What can I do to make it be er for

me? (oh yeah, and I'm 16.)

Thank you!

Sex Advice Desired

Elena sighed as she filed the e-mail into her Other folder unanswered. She
wished she could give some useful advice to SAD, she really did, but she
simply couldn't. This wasn't the first me someone had wri en to Miss
Lonely Love asking ques ons about sex, not by a long shot. She used to just
ignore them, but a few months ago she'd begun saving them, although she
wasn't really sure why.

The problem was that Elena didn't consider herself to be the least bit
qualified to offer guidance about anything sex-related. She'd only done it
once, over a year ago, and it hadn't exactly been an experience she would
classify as fun. At the me, she'd been da ng Ma Donovan – Vickie's
older brother actually, who was off at Duke now. They hadn't ever been
anything serious, but Elena had been depressed about her mother's death
and had gone to him one a ernoon and told him she didn't want to be a
virgin anymore. Unsurprisingly, he'd been more than happy to help her
out. The whole thing had le her decidedly underwhelmed. She'd stopped
seeing Ma on a roman c basis not long a er, although they'd had no
problem remaining friends. And although she'd gone on a few dates here
and there since then, she hadn't had any urge to try sex again. She felt
vaguely guilty for not being able to reply to SAD's ques ons, but there was
nothing she could do about it. Hopefully the girl would ask her friends a er
all, or find a way to use the internet without having to worry about nosy
family members.

Taking a sip of hot chocolate, Elena typed out her answers to the other
le ers and tried to forget about it. The rapid clicking of her fingers dashing
across the keyboard filled her ears, and before she knew it, it was me to
go home.

It was another brutally cold night.

The Gilbert house was s ll and quiet as Elena lay in her bed, shivering as
she stared up into the dark. She had her warmest flannel pajamas on, and
had tossed an extra blanket over her comforter, but she s ll couldn't seem
to get warm enough.

There was no wind tonight, but the icy temperatures seemed to permeate
everything. Her father had salted the front step and walkway, but there
were s ll slippery spots. She'd nearly fallen twice coming down the
sidewalk of her street, eventually deciding to just walk in the road itself for
be er purchase under her boots.

Now she huddled under four blankets and wondered, not for the first me,
if perhaps her dad had been late paying the hea ng bill this month. She
would have to check into it in the morning, just to make sure.

Instead of changing posi on for the umpteenth me and ge ng more

frustrated with her wakefulness, Elena instead reached out and switched
on the lamp. Pushing back the covers, she slid from beneath them and
kneeled on the floor in front of her bookshelf. Cold seeped through the
floorboards, the thin carpet and the fabric of her pajamas, making her
shiver. As her eyes grudgingly adjusted to the intrusion of the light, she
scanned the spines, blinking, un l she found the book she was searching
for. She plucked it out and dove back into the rela ve warmth of her bed.

Le ng the book fall open to the two envelopes concealed between the
pages, through glassy eyes she re-read both le ers from JAI. Elena wasn't
quite sure why they'd even popped into her head, but once the idea got in
there she'd been unable to stop herself from looking them over again.
There wasn't much to the second one; he wasn't asking for any advice, just
thanking her. There was no valid reason for her to feel compelled to reply
to him. No reason at all.
Retrieving a pad and pen from her nightstand drawer, she propped it up
again the back of the book and began to write.

Dear JAI,

I have to ask: why are you shu ng yourself off from another rela onship
ever again? I don't know how old you are, but surely that vow is a bit
premature? I know you feel hurt and betrayed – badly – and I get that your
trust has been sha ered, but is it really worth becoming a hermit forever?
Shu ng yourself off from the chance of future happiness?

You say you met a girl and you had fun. Was there a connec on there by
any chance? Will you see her again? Forget the idea of da ng for a
moment - do you think you two could be friends?

I guess my point is that you didn't do anything wrong to cause the horrible
situa on you went through with your ex (that I know of), so why should you
be punished for the rest of your life because of it? Just something to think
about.

If you want someone to talk to, you are welcome to con nue to correspond
with me. Some mes it's easier to share our true feelings with anonymous
strangers. Even if you just want to talk about other things, I'm here.

Have a good week,

Miss LL

Elena yawned and set the book, le ers and pen on the floor beside her bed
before switching off the light. Pulling up the blankets to her chin again, she
turned on her side and closed her eyes, now feeling much more red than
she'd been before. The tap dripped in the bathroom down the hall. Her
brother snored lightly from his room next to it. And sleep, blessed sleep,
finally washed over her.
A/N Thanks so much to those of you who take the me to leave me a
review. You guys who review are the best readers in the world! Special
thank you to scarle 2112 for pre-reading! Would love it if you would
please review and me know what you think of this chapter. The next
chapter is going to be the party. Thank you!
6. Chapter 6
Chapter 6

Damon moved from room to room, sliding books from shelves, looking
them over briefly, pu ng them back. He trailed his fingers along various
surfaces as he passed, examining at the dust he gathered with disinterest.
He adjusted his glasses over and over, pacing, trying to keep his mind
occupied.

The Valen ne's party was tonight, and he was due to pick up Elena in a few
hours. Since he'd arrived in Mys c Falls, he'd been trying to keep a low
profile. Other than her, his uncle and a few random cashiers, he'd not really
talked to anyone. Though he'd been to many par es, both formal and
informal, in his life, the idea of a ending this one – for no logical reason he
could pinpoint – was making him antsy.

Damon wandered into the study. Zach sat with a glass of whisky in hand,
reading the paper in front of the fire. He looked up as Damon entered the
room. "Another le er for JAI came yesterday," he informed his nephew,
indica ng the table by Damon's elbow. "Who the hell is JAI?"

Picking up the envelope, Damon no ced the familiar rounded handwri ng

on the front. With a small smile, he stuffed it into his back pocket. "Long
story," he mumbled, turning to go.

Zach folded the paper and set it beside him. "Your dad called this
morning," he said.

Damon's spine went as s ff as his facial expression. "Oh yeah?"

"He wants to know when you're coming home."

He looked back at his uncle. "And what did you tell him?"

"That I didn't know if you were."

Not fucking likely, Damon thought. Out loud he asked, "How'd he take
that?"

"He's worried about you, Damon. He's worried you're throwing your en re
life away just cause some girl broke your heart."

Some girl? Not just some girl – THE girl. And if she stayed with Stefan and
they married, he'd always have to look at the two of them at family
gatherings and remember their betrayal. Ergo, no more family gatherings.
He wasn't close to his father anyway; surely Damon's presence wouldn't be
missed.

With a snort, he replied, "That's what he told you? Bullshit. He's worried
about looking bad in front of his rich asshole friends if they find out he has
a loser for a son."

Zach sighed. "I know things haven't been…easy between you two since
your mom passed away. But he loves you. He may not show it very well,
but trust me, he does. My brother's never been one to share feelings, and
he hasn't been the same since he lost Isabella."

At the men on of his mother's name Damon's throat constricted. Even ten
years later, thinking of her hurt. He supposed it always would. Applying the
same logic to the other woman who'd broken his heart – this me
deliberately – he knew he would never be able to return back into the
family fold.

"Uh huh," he mu ered.

His uncle's eyes held no judgment, only sympathy. "Hope one of these days
you'll consider speaking to him when he calls. If you're s ll here next me
he calls, that is."

Damon remembered Elena's request to make sure to let her know if he

decided to leave town so she wouldn't worry. He thought of the pre y
smile she always had for him every me she saw him come into the coffee
shop. It wasn't so bad in Mys c Falls. Maybe he'd end up s cking around
for a bit.

"Don't hold your breath on that one," he replied with a slight shake of his
head.

"Which? You talking to your dad or you s ll being here?"

"The former."

"Oh good," Zach smiled. "Don't tell anyone I said so, but I kinda like having
you around."

Damon chuckled so ly, shaking his head. "You'll probably live to regret that
admission."

His uncle's smile grew wider. "I'm sure I will."

Damon went upstairs to his room and stretched out across the bed. Using
his teeth, he tore off the end of the envelope and pulled out the folded
note inside. He read it over quickly.

Grabbing a pad of paper from his desk drawer, he started to scrawl a reply.

Becoming a hermit sounds pre y good to me right now.

He stared at it for a moment before scratching it out.

You're right. I do feel hurt and betrayed. Wouldn't you?

With a sigh he crossed that out, too.

His pen spun in his fingers as he thought harder. Then he ripped out the
messed up page and tossed it longhand toward the waste can. Bull's-eye!
One fist pumped the air for an invisible cheering crowd. With an
unblemished sheet in front of him, he pressed his lips together and began
to write.
Dear Miss LL,

You want to correspond? Sure, why not? I can do that. Anonymity means
lack of judgment, and that is a concept I can get behind.

I met my ex when I was 19 and she was 17, in her final year of high school. I
wasn't in college; I was taking a year to "find myself" or whatever such crap
I told my family anyway. Basically I was a deadbeat, living at home,
spending my father's cash and hooking up with nearly every hot girl I saw.

Un l I met her. She was different from the others. Pre y, yes, but pre y
girls weren't hard to come by for me. This one was far more than just
pre y. She was beau ful – top-shelf beau ful. Tall, fit, and put together in
all the right ways. She looked like a supermodel, and in many ways she
acted like one, too.

She wasn't into high school boys. I don't think she ever had been, even
when she was just a starry-eyed freshman. She told me she always went for
college guys and bad boys. I was neither. Sure, I liked to have a drink every
now and then, and ge ng laid had never been any par cular challenge,
but I wasn't a true bad boy. No ta oos, no motorcycles, no cigare e
dangling from my lower lip like James Dean rudely teleported into the
wrong decade. I was just a lazy-ass rich kid, was ng his life away.

(Ironically I guess I s ll am.)

So I didn't know what she saw in me, but I didn't much care either. The only
thing that ma ered was that she saw something. She wanted me, when a
girl who looked like that could have had anybody. I never stood a chance in
hell of resis ng her charms. Not that I wanted to resist. I think I fell head
over heels in love with her the first night we spent together.

More fool, me, as it turned out.

I'd never been in love before. I didn't know how one was supposed to act,
or what cons tuted smothering, or too much pressure. I treated her like a
queen. Flowers, fancy dinners, shopping trips, public declara ons of love –
as you can tell I was a smi en ki en. And one memorable night she told me
she loved me, too, and, like the lovelorn idiot I was, I believed her.

We were together for two years. You already know how it ended.

Your turn.

JAI

Damon tore the sheet from the pad and slid it into an envelope. He'd drop
it into a mailbox downtown on his way to pick up Elena. Which reminded
him, he really needed to start ge ng ready.

"So what's he look like?"

Elena raised her right shoulder, l ng her ear to hold her phone in place as
she used both hands to rummage through the bo om of her closet looking
for her black heels. "He's…hold on." Finding the elusive shoes, she tugged
them out and looked them over skep cally. Then she retrieved the phone
from its precarious perch and straightened up.

"Um…he's tall and slim. He wears glasses and has shaggy brown hair and
the most incredible blue eyes.

"So he's cute?" Bonnie asked. Elena could hear the smile in her voice.

"Very. But like I told you – this is not a date." She opened a dresser drawer
and pulled out a pair of black pantyhose. God, she hated wearing
pantyhose!

Bonnie chuckled. "If you say so."

"It's not! We're just friends. You know my thoughts on ge ng involved

with anyone right now."

"Yeah, I know. But August is s ll a long way off. You're only a senior once,
Elena. You deserve to have some fun."
Elena sighed. "I only own three pairs of jeans, yet two formal dresses hang
in my closet. How is that fair? Couldn't I just trade them in for more jeans?
Also, black and white floral strapless or red sa n?"

"It's a Valen ne's party! Definitely red sa n– you look gorgeous in that
one. I wanna see pictures!"

Pulling the dress from the hanger, Elena tossed it on the bed. "I'll get my
dad to take a few before we leave," she replied distractedly, eyeing the
fabric for stains from the last me it was worn.

"Including Damon."

She sighed again. "Fine. Including Damon. If he's willing."

Elena heard a nkling of bells through the phone. "Okay, I'm walking into
the Clutch. Talk to you tomorrow. Have an amazing me! Live on the edge
and kiss a boy, will ya?"

"Bonnie! That's not-"

"Bye!" Then her friend was gone.

Elena stared at the phone for a moment, heat rushing to her cheeks as an
image from her dream about Damon flashed across her mind. Se ng it on
her dresser, she pulled off her sweater and yoga pants and returned her
a en on to the dress on the bed.

By the me she heard her dad's car pull into the driveway she'd put it on
and was checking herself out in the full length mirror with a doub ul
expression. The dark red fabric clung to her body; was it her imagina on or
did it fit a bit snugger than last year? Had she put on weight? She didn't
think so. Maybe her curves were just a bit…fuller now than they'd been
before. Was it too ght? Was it too slu y? The last thing she wanted was
for Damon to think she looked cheap.
Filled with sudden inspira on, she dashed across the hall to the master
bedroom, sliding open the closet door and groping around on the shelf
above the rod of dust-covered clothing. Her fingers closed around
something so and she pulled it down, her mother's favorite black shawl in
her hands. Elena's heart twinged as memories came flooding back of her
mom si ng on the couch in the living room swearing to herself under her
breath, kni ng needles flying as she reworked a sec on of the
complicated pa ern. She knew if her mother was here with her now she'd
undoubtedly let Elena borrow it for the party - as long as she was careful
with it.

With that thought in mind she went back to her room and closed the door,
draping the lacey knit over her shoulders and re-examining her reflec on.
This was much be er. And she'd be warmer now, too, as the dress's inch-
wide shoulder straps didn't do much more than hide her bra.

There was a knock on her bedroom door. "Elena?" Her father's face poked
around the edge. He looked red, but then again, of course he was red -
he'd been at the shop for eleven hours today. "You look lovely." He didn't
men on the shawl, but she was sure he recognized it.

With a smile, she replied, "Thanks, Dad."

"This boy of yours will be here in a half hour?"

Elena nodded. "Yes. And he's not my boy. Please don't say that in front of
Damon."

"Never," her father promised, winking. "You and your brother get some
dinner?"

"We had sandwiches. You know there's always enough food to feed all of
Mys c Falls at these things. It's totally excessive!" She grabbed her curling
iron and began to twist thick strands of hair around the barrel. "I'll be
ready. I s ll have plenty of me."
Her dad laughed. "Sure you will. You're just like your mother – always
fussing about with this or that un l you're running late."

"So I'm a perfec onist – you say that like it's a bad thing!"

Grayson shook his head and smiled. "Just think about it this way: do you
really want me and Jer to have to entertain your boy while he waits for
you?"

Elena grimaced, rolling her eyes at him. "Point taken. Now go have a quick
shower and change before he gets here!"

By the me she heard the doorbell ring at just about seven o'clock on the
nose, she had just finished applying lip gloss. Dropping it into her purse,
she dashed for the door, elbowing her brother out of the way as he was
about to answer it. She pulled it wide to find Damon wai ng on her front
step.

"Hey," Elena greeted him, smiling. "Come in for a minute." She gestured
inward with her arm as she stepped back to allow him space to enter.

For a moment he seemed to hesitate. Then he stepped onto the mat and
stomped snow from his boots, unbu oning the top two bu ons on his
jacket and loosening his scarf as she shut the door behind him. His glasses
were nowhere to be seen and Elena made a mental note to ask if he had
contacts.

She followed the path of his eyes as they moved from his boots to her
heels, gliding up her calves and over her knees, rising along the shiny fabric
of her dress to her bare upper chest. Her skin seemed to sear beneath his
gaze. When at last his eyes met hers, she smiled shyly, sure her face was as
red as the ou it she wore.

His Adam's apple bobbed as Damon stared, eyes wide and glazed. At last
he spoke. "You look…" He swallowed and tried again. "You look beau ful,
Elena."
Before she could respond her dad came down the hallway toward them.
He now wore his favorite plaid sport coat over a pair of charcoal gray
trousers. She'd mended the cuffs of that jacket earlier, as they were ge ng
worn in several places.

Her father smiled as he took in Damon standing there in his black felt pea
coat and stunned expression. "You must be Damon," he said, extending his
hand.

Damon's eyes shot back into focus. He flashed Grayson a grin as he shook
his hand. "Pleased to meet you, sir. You know my uncle Zach I think?"

"Yes, Zach's been coming into my shop for years. He's a bit of a hermit,
huh? Never seems to do much socializing around town."

Shrugging, Damon said, "He went through a rough divorce before he

moved here. I think he just prefers the peace and quiet, although I've put a
bit of a crimp in that lately."

"Ah. And what brings you to Mys c Falls?" her father asked.

Knowing Damon's reluctance to discuss that par cular subject, Elena

jumped in. "Daddy, we've go a get going. We'll see you and Jer at the
party." With that, she pulled her coat from the hook and was startled when
Damon took it from her hands and held it out so she could slip her arms
into it. She no ced her dad watching them with clear approval in his dark
eyes so much like her own.

Tugging off her heels, Elena slid into her feet into her scuffed old boots as
Damon politely said goodbye to Grayson. Her brother had disappeared into
his bedroom as soon as Damon arrived, so she'd have to introduce the two
of them later.

As she stepped over the threshold, she felt Damon's hand brush the small
of her back before he closed the door behind them. A shiver passed
through her that had nothing to do with the chill in the air.
The big colonial mansion loomed into view as they came around a bend in
the driveway. Tiny twinkling lights adorned the columns and façade; they
seemed to echo the stars, glowing pinpoints above them in the frozen
night sky. Elena could tell the clear weather wouldn't last though. Coming
down Route Four she'd noted tall clouds building up on the mountains, and
knew they'd soon descend to dump their burden of snow.

Damon drove slowly, looking for a space to park among all the vehicles
along both sides of the road. A er spo ng one and maneuvering into
place, he instructed Elena to stay put as he came around to open her door
for her.

She looked down at his extended hand for a second before slipping her
gloved fingers into his. A flu er of disappointment passed through her
when he dropped it again once she had both feet firmly on the ground. She
scolded herself mentally for the fickle emo on.

The first sca erings of light snow began to fall as she walked up the front
steps with Damon close by her side. They were greeted at the door by a
young man in a tux whom Elena vaguely recognized from school. Damon
helped her remove her coat, then shrugged off his own and surrendered
them both to the valet while Elena switched from her boots to her heels.

Just as she'd go en herself organized Tyler's mother swept into the front
entranceway, glass of white wine in hand. "Elena Gilbert! So pleased to see
you. Will your father and brother also be joining us tonight?"

"Hi Mrs. Lockwood. Yes, they'll be here any minute."

Mrs. Lockwood's eyes swept past her and landed on Damon. Her smile
amped up, all white teeth against red lips ck. "And who is this handsome
young man with you?"

Before Elena could respond, Mrs. Lockwood turned to Damon and held out
her bejeweled fingers. "I'm Carole Lockwood. Welcome to our annual
Valen ne's party. Can I get you a drink?" She snapped the fingers of her
other hand beside her head and, as if by magic, another tuxedoed guy with
a tray of wine glasses appeared at her side.

Damon cleared his throat and glanced at Elena. "This is Damon Salvatore,"
she told Carole. "Zach Salvatore's nephew. He's new in town." It crossed
her mind that Mrs. Lockwood probably had no idea who Zach even was.

Damon took her proffered hand and gave it a quick pump. "Pleased to
meet you, Mrs. Lockwood. You have a beau ful home. I'm glad Elena
invited me to join her tonight."

She glanced between them with clear curiosity, and Elena wondered if she
was trying to determine if they were a couple. Turned her full a en on
back to Damon, Carole said, "Welcome to Mys c Falls, Damon. I'm sure
you'll love our beau ful li le town, especially once it warms up a bit." She
plucked two glasses of wine from the waiter's tray and put them in Damon
and Elena's hands. "Please make yourself at home. Elena can give you the
grand tour." She paused, looking Damon up and down once again. "Or, if
you'd like, I'd be happy to make me to show you around myself."

"Thank you. I'm sure Elena will take care of me tonight," he responded
politely.

Carole laughed, winking at Elena. "I'm sure she will." Then she sauntered
off to join the guests in the adjacent room.

Elena's face grew warm at the double-entendre, memories from her dream
flashing through her mind.

"She seems like a piece of work," Damon mu ered, leaning close to her ear
as they started down the hallway.

Elena rolled her eyes. "That's one way of pu ng it. If you see her even
once tonight without a drink in her hand, I'll buy your coffee for the next
week."

That earned her a smile. "Lush?"

"Pre y much." Elena raised her glass to her lips. The wine was tart, but had
a nice fruity a ertaste. She took a second sip.

Damon raised a brow at her. "Underage drinking tonight, are we? What will
your father say about that? And will I get blamed?"

With a laugh, Elena replied, "Don't worry about Dad." She upended the
remainder of the wine into her mouth, swished it around and swallowed it
as she held his bemused gaze.

He stared at her for a moment before chuckling. "Planning on tying one on

tonight? Is that why you invited me? To carry you out of here later?" Elena
snorted, shaking her head. He took a swig from his own glass and
grimaced. "First stop on our li le tour: show me the bar. I need a real
drink."

A slight buzz was already star ng and, taking advantage of the courage it
brought, she linked her hand through his elbow and guided him into the
large living room. As they approached the bar along the back, she heard a
familiar laugh. Craning her neck to see around the tall man in front of her,
Elena spo ed Caroline standing at the bar sipping a drink and talking to her
date, Jesse.

Jesse Jordan played on the basketball team with Jeremy and Tyler, but he
didn't run in the same crowds as either of them. He was a good foot taller
than Caroline, with close cropped dark hair and high cheekbones. At the
moment she was in full flirt mode with one had a hand on his arm as she
stretched on her ptoes to whisper something to him.

Elena decided now was as good a me as any to go over and get the
necessary hellos out of the way. She tugged Damon toward the bar.

"Hey Care," she said as they approaching the couple. Caroline wore a baby
pink strapless sheath that showcased her every curve - and she had plenty
of them. Jesse could barely keep his eyes off her generous cleavage.
Caroline greeted her with a smile. "Hi Elena." Then her gaze li ed over
Elena's shoulder and landed on Damon. Her deep blue eyes flared. She
leaned in close to Elena's ear and dropped her voice. "Who's your date?"

Elena felt her cheeks heat up again and she released Damon's arm. "He's
um…he's not-"

"Damon," he cut in. "Great to meetcha." He gave the blonde a polite grin.

"Oh…um…" For once in her life, Caroline Forbes seemed to be at a loss for
words. "You, too," she replied, finally re-finding her trademark dazzling
smile.

Jesse introduced himself, and he and Damon turned to the bartender to

order drinks, leaving Caroline staring at Elena with what could only be
interpreted as blatant admira on.

"He's hot!" she mouthed, dar ng her eyes in Damon's direc on, just in
case Elena was too dumb to realize who she meant.

"I know," Elena mouthed back, feigning nonchalance as she leaned her
back against the bar. Let Caroline think Damon was her date. Why not? It
might be good for her reputa on if the other girls at school thought she
had an a rac ve older boyfriend. Even if it wasn't true.

Once Caroline and Jesse wandered off to greet some new arrivals, Damon
slid over un l his shoulder brushed Elena's. He had a glass of what looked
like whiskey in his hand. "She a friend of yours?"

"Who? Caroline? Sort of. Not really. I mean, we know each other, but…"

"You're not close," Damon finished, taking a sip from his glass as his eyes
wandered over the huddles of people. It seemed like more were coming in
every minute.

"Not especially, no."

Jeremy picked that moment to walk into the room. He scanned the crowd
un l his eyes connected with his sister. "My brother's here," Elena told
Damon.

"Where?"

There was no need to point him out; he walked right up to them. "Hey,
'Lena. You seen Vickie around here anywhere?" He spared only a
disinterested glance at Damon.

"Not yet, no. I haven't seen Ty yet either."

"Okay." Jeremy turned to go, presumably to con nue searching for his
friend, but Elena called him back.

He turned around with one eyebrow raised. "What?"

Elena mo oned to Damon. "This is Damon," she said.

Jeremy gave him the once-over. "Okay."

"Jeremy! Don't be rude." She turned to Damon. "This is my obnoxious li le

brother."

Damon chuckled. "I've got one of those, too." He stuck a hand out to
Jeremy. "Nice to meetcha dude."

They held eye contact for a moment; it appeared to Elena like each was
sizing up the other, challenging the other…for what? She had no idea. Then
her brother broke into a smile and any tension there had been – if it hadn't
been only her imagina on – dissipated.

"You, too. Catch you guys later." Jeremy headed off toward the dining
room, leaving a somewhat bewildered Elena to mentally regroup. Her
brother hadn't seen her with a guy since she'd broken up with Ma , so his
overprotec ve sibling ins ncts had probably just kicked in for a moment.
She made a mental note to set him straight on her con nued singleness
later.

Elena looked up at Damon at the same me he was looking down at her.

"Feel like con nuing my tour?" he asked.

She showed him the rest of the sprawling main floor. He was most
impressed with the modern and well-equipped kitchen. It was crawling
with caterers and waiters, so they didn't linger, but she no ced the
covetous admira on on his face as he checked out all the high-tech
appliances.

"You cook?" she asked, trying to hide the note of surprise from her voice.
Her father and brother weren't capable of much more than grilled cheese
or bacon and eggs.

Damon chuckled. "My mom taught me when I was a kid, and our
housekeeper showed me more stuff as I got older. She some mes had to
shoo me out of the kitchen when I got in her way too much."

Elena smiled, trying to imagine what Damon had looked like as a kid. She
just couldn't do it; all she could picture was the man in front of her, but
smaller.

Jeremy appeared at her side, beer in hand. "You're drinking?" she asked,
brows raised.

Her brother rolled his eyes. "So're you. How else are we supposed to make
it through this thing?"

"Does Dad know?"

"I'll just say I'm holding it for Damon if he asks."

Now it was Elena's turn for an eye roll. "Did you find Vickie?"
With a sigh, Jeremy said, "Yeah. Last I saw she was dancing with Ty." He
gestured toward the living room where space had been cleared in the
middle to make a temporary dance floor. A few couples were dancing, but
most people s ll just stood around the periphery and cha ed with their
drinks in hand. More alcohol would need to flow before the floor would
really get jumping.

Jeremy wandered off toward the study. Elena looked back at Damon in

me to see him set his empty tumbler on a nearby counter. "Which way to
the powder room?" he mock-whispered.

She showed him to the washroom near the front entranceway, but it was
occupied. "C'mon," she said, poin ng to the curved wooden staircase.

Raising an eyebrow, Damon's lip curled into a smirk. "Taking me upstairs?

What would your father say?" He added a wink to ensure she got that he
was teasing.

Elena flushed, but smiled back. 'You ha a pee or not?"

She started up the steps and he obediently followed. They turned right and
went down the hall un l she paused in front of a par ally open door. "In
there," she mo oned. "I'll wait at the top of the stairs." Damon
disappeared inside.

The general cacophony of cha er and music from the party dri ed up to
Elena where she stood, arms on the balcony rail, looking down at the
people milling about in the entranceway below. She liked this. Being the
unseen observer instead of the par cipant was much more her style; she
tended to prefer a bit of distance between herself and all the ac on.

"I said, stop!"

With a jolt, her head swiveled in the direc on of the yell. The voice was
female, and sounded familiar. She took a few cau ous steps along the
hallway in the opposite direc on from the bathroom.
She heard a responding low rumble that sounded male. Elena couldn't
make out the words.

"Take your hands off me!"

Elena's eyes widened. Was that Vickie? Figh ng with Tyler? She ptoed
closer. The voices were coming from behind a closed door.

"What's your problem tonight? One minute you're hot, the next an Ice
Queen. I don't get you." That was definitely Tyler.

Vickie's tone so ened a bit. "There's nothing to get. I'm not playing games
with you - we have to go back to the party."

"I'm sure no one will miss us for a few minutes," Tyler grumbled.

Elena heard movement within. She hurried back to the balcony in case one
of them came out of the room. Her heart was pounding. Where was
Jeremy? She leaned over the rail, trying to see if she could spot him.

"Hey."

She jumped back in surprise, but it was only Damon.

"Who're you looking for?" he wondered, smiling.

At the sound of a door opening down the hall, she grabbed his arm in a
panic, dragging him down the stairs.

"Whoa, what's your rush?" he asked as they reached the bo om. Elena
released Damon's sleeve and glanced up to see Tyler stride down the
upstairs hallway, heading away from the room where she'd overheard part
of his conversa on. He looked annoyed.

"It's nothing," she mu ered. Sighing, she took in the party, which now
appeared to be in full swing. More waiters were circula ng, offering guests
trays of chocolate truffles and champagne. The music had slowed to
roman c ballads, and the dance floor was filling up. She didn't see her dad,
but spo ed Jeremy dancing awkwardly with Caroline's mom over near the
front windows. On impulse, Elena turned to Damon. "Can you dance?"

Surprised, he replied, "Um, sure." Before he knew it, she'd latched onto his
hand and was pulling him out into the midst of the couples on the floor. At
that moment the song changed to Chris DeBurgh's "Lady in Red", and
Damon couldn't help but appreciate the appropriateness. He slid one arm
around her waist and held her fingers up by their shoulders with the other.

Elena looked into his eyes as they began to dance. Her feet knew all the
moves from years of func ons like these, and they fell into step with his
lead. She didn't have to concentrate on dancing, but instead of thinking
about Vickie and Tyler, all her brain could focus on was the proximity of
Damon's body to her own. The fresh scent of his cologne enveloped her,
and as she breathed it in she felt a ghtening in her lower belly. Her pulse,
which had begun to return to normal, sped right back up again.

Damon's brows drew together as he looked down at her. "Something

wrong?" he whispered.

She knew her cheeks were once again flaming. "No, I'm fine."

"Red is definitely your color," he told her with a small nod. She knew he
meant her dress, and she appreciated the compliment, but all she could
think was that her face probably matched the fabric.

"Thank you," she mumbled.

A faraway voice in her head reminded her she wanted to tell Jeremy what
she'd overhead, and that she should be steering them toward her brother
and Mrs. Forbes so she could switch partners and speak with him. That
voice seemed small and unimportant right now.

They locked eyes and danced, moving automa cally, for the first me
connected both physically and mentally. Damon smiled and it was genuine,
his usual defenses at least temporarily down. Elena echoed it right back to
him, no longer feeling like an outsider looking in, but for once somewhere
she truly wanted to be.

A/N Thanks for reading! Extra thanks to scarle 2112 for prereading the
first dra of this. I didn't have me to beta, so if you see errors, please
tweet or DM me so I can correct them. Thanks! (I always seem to miss
stuff!) Part 2 of the night of the party comes next, and things definitely are
star ng to get more interes ng! Please review? Reviewers are the actual
best!

PS if you want to, please follow me on twi er or tumblr: elvishgrrl

7. Chapter 7
Chapter 7

All too soon the song came to an end. Damon released her hand and
stepped back and a vague sense of disappointment came over Elena. She
tried to ignore it, reminding herself she needed to speak to Jeremy.

"Excuse me for a minute?" she said to Damon. When he nodded, she

hurried a er her brother, who appeared to be on his way to the kitchen.

"Jer, hold on," she called.

He stopped and turned to her. "What's up?"

Elena grabbed the fabric of his jacket sleeve and tugged him into the back
study. It wasn't deserted, but at least they could hear each other without
needing to yell.

"I overheard Vickie and Tyler upstairs earlier," she told him in a low voice.
When he just raised an inquisi ve eyebrow, she added, "Figh ng."

Jeremy eyes widened. "What did you hear?"

She explained what she could, but unfortunately she hadn't caught all that
much of the argument. Jeremy looked displeased, but not angry, which
was good. "So it sounded like it was about sex?"

Elena shrugged. "I don't know. Maybe."

He frowned. "I wish I could ask her what's going on, but I don't think she'd
take it very well coming from me."

"I know. I wish you could, too. Hopefully Vick can take care of herself."
"Yeah. Hope so. Thanks for telling me. If I find out anything else, I'll let you
know." With that, her brother con nued on his way.

Before Elena could go back into the main room in search of Damon, her
father stepped into the study. When he saw her he came right over. "There
you are. Been wondering where you'd go en to."

"Hey. Yeah, it seems extra crowded this year."

Glancing around the room, he asked, "Where's your boy?"

Elena rolled her eyes, but she couldn't help but smile. "I told you, he's not
my boy, Daddy. We're just friends. Honest!"

"So you say. But I saw how you looked at him earlier. He's a good looking
fella. And college isn't for months yet."

Heat rose to her cheeks. "Are you implying you'd be cool with me da ng
Damon? Really?"

Grayson laughed. "I'm your father - I don't know if I'll be," he paused,
adding finger-quotes, "cool with you da ng anyone, ever. But I know Zach,
and he says Damon's a good guy. I just want you to be happy and have a bit
of fun. It's been so long since-"

"It's okay, Dad, you don't need to-"

"Since I've seen you happy, Elena," he finished.

Her throat ghtened. Her father was right – she hadn't allowed herself
much happiness since her mother died. None of them had. "I know," she
whispered, tugging the borrowed shawl up around her shoulders. "I'm just
trying to make the right choices so I can get a full scholarship, like you and
Mom wanted."

Empathy filled his dark brown eyes as he put a hand on her shoulder.
"What I want – what your mother and I would want – is for you to study
hard, get good grades, but s ll find some me to enjoy your life. You're
only young once. You work so hard all the me…and I'm so proud of you
for it…but if you decided you wanted to do something a li le selfish once
in a while, something just for yourself, that would make you happy, I'd be
all for it. You know?"

She nodded, exhaling a small laugh. "Don't make me cry – I'll make a mess
of my makeup!"

Her father looked apologe c. "Sorry, hon. This probably wasn't the right
me or place for that li le speech."

"No, it's fine." She swiped the pads of her index fingers under both eyes,
whisking away the moisture gathered there. "I think we're going to take off
soon though, so I'll see you at home later, okay?"

"Okay. Have a good rest of your night, swee e." Grayson pa ed her arm
and wandered off toward the kitchen, leaving Elena to take some deep
breaths and try to regain her composure. A passing waiter stopped to offer
her a glass of wine from his tray. She gratefully accepted, drinking deep.

When she felt like she could again breathe without her chest aching, she
returned to the main room. The dance floor was filled with elegant couples
slowly spinning to Nat King Cole's classic "Unforge able". Love felt like it
really was in the air; it seemed to radiate from the faces of everyone she
saw. Tyler and Vickie were dancing close together off in one corner, eyes
only for each other, whatever they'd been arguing about forgo en.

For a moment, she felt jealous of all the starry-eyed couples, wishing she,
too, had someone who would look at her like that. Ma had liked her,
thought she was pre y, but he'd never stared at her with such clear
devo on in his eyes like she saw on most of these people. No one had ever
looked at her that way.

Elena shut her eyes for a moment and told herself to snap out of it. A er
college she'd have the rest of her life to find the man of her dreams, as
Miss Lonely Love would surely advise her – if she were real, that is.
She walked around the perimeter of the room un l she spo ed Damon
leaning against the high back of an armchair, arms folded over his chest,
gazing off into the distance. His features were set in an alluring, yet
implacable mask.

Approaching him, she asked, "Whatcha staring at?"

He started. "Oh, Elena. I spaced out for a moment there. Where'd you get
off to?"

"Sorry for abandoning you. I needed to tell my brother something. Then

my dad showed up and we ended up talking about my mom." She paused,
shrugging. "And I needed a few minutes to myself a er that."

Damon narrowed his eyes, looking at her closely. "You okay?"

"Yeah." She sighed, glancing at the dancers again. "I think I've done my
penance for the evening. Wanna get out of here?"

He smiled. "Sounds good."

"Great. I already said bye to Dad. Let's go thank Mrs. Lockwood and grab
our coats."

They wove through the crowd un l they spo ed Carole cha ng with
Marcus Fell at the bar. Marcus was a councilman who worked with her
husband, the mayor. Elena had always thought he looked down his nose at
her father, so she tended to ignore him.

"Hello again, Elena," Carole said before her focus shi ed to Damon. "And…
Damon, isn't it?"

"Yes. We're just heading out, Mrs. Lockwood. We wanted to thank you for
invi ng us into your beau ful home tonight." Elena smiled at her and
hoped it looked genuine.
"Oh, you're leaving so soon? The party's just ge ng started!" Again, her
gaze darted to Damon. Elena had to restrain herself from rolling her eyes.
There was no denying he was a rac ve, but he was only four years older
than Tyler, for God's sake!

"I want to get Elena home safely," Damon answered for her. "Looks like the
roads are star ng to get bad out there."

Carole seemed surprised. "Are they? I hadn't no ced. Maybe that's why
Caroline Forbes and her date le already."

Elena held back a knowing grin. She knew exactly why Caroline and Jesse
had slipped out early, and it had nothing to do with the road condi ons.

They said their goodbyes and went into the entranceway, where Damon
asked one of the valets to retrieve their jackets. As they waited, Jeremy
passed through with another beer in his hand. He stopped when he saw
them.

"You guys taking off?"

"Yeah. I'm pre y much done," Elena replied.

"Dad wants to s ck around awhile longer. He's talking sidewalk de-icing

with one of the city council dudes. I'll see ya later."

Before her brother could walk away, Elena remembered Bonnie's request
for a photo of Damon and herself tonight, all dressed up pre y. "Jer, wait."
She rummaged in her purse for her phone.

"What?"

"Can you…hold on." She sighed, looking back up at him. "I was gonna ask
you to take a pic of us, but I can't find my phone." With a frown she added,
"I think I might've le it on my dresser." From the corner of her eye, she
saw Damon glance at her in surprise.
Jeremy's brows shot up comically. "You? Forget your phone? That's like you
forge ng a finger!"

Elena rolled her eyes. "Very funny. You have yours?"

"Yeah."

"Can you take it please?"

S ll chuckling, her brother said, "Sure." He held his phone in front of his
face, one eye squin ng at the image on the small screen. "Snuggle close,
you two."

She felt her cheeks heat up – no, check that – her en re body heat up as
Damon slid an arm around her waist and pulled her against his side.

As she was tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear, the flash went off.
"Take another one. I wasn't ready!" she exclaimed with a note of irrita on.

Jeremy sighed. "Fine. Now smile pre y. Three, two, go."

Damon and Elena both grinned as he took another shot. Jeremy held his
phone out for his sister's approval.

Elena scru nized the photo carefully. Damon's hand was on the side of her
lower ribcage and his head leaned close to hers, looking for all the world
like this was something he did every day, cuddle up to her. He was grinning,
with eyes flared wide. The flash had been bright enough that you could
clearly see their par cular shade of intense blue, even in the dim light of
the Lockwood's front hallway. He looked sinfully delicious, but then again,
he always did. Turning her a en on to herself, she thought she appeared…
young. And kind of red. But the smile on her face was genuine, so it
would have to do.

"Thanks, bro. That's great. Can you send it to my phone?"

"Will do. Night." With that, he disappeared down the hallway.

Seconds later the valet came around the corner with their jackets. Damon
took them both and tucked a folded bill into the guy's hand, earning a
grateful smile. Turning to Elena, he again held her coat out for her to slip
her arms into. She wondered if his mother had taught him such good
manners, or if he'd just picked these things up on his own. None of the
boys she knew behaved like that.

When they stepped outside, Elena was not all that surprised to see it was
snowing. What surprised her, however, was how much had fallen in the
two hours and a bit that they'd been indoors. Every car, every hedge, every
branch of every tree was coated in a thick shroud of white. Fat snowflakes
poured down, making even seeing across to the other side of the driveway
difficult.

"Wait here," Damon told her, taking in the condi ons with concern. "I'll go
clean off the Jeep and pull it up."

"Thanks. I guess we'll have to forgo a snow fight tonight, huh?"

He flashed her a smirk. "I'm up for it if you are. With you hampered by that
ght li le dress I might even have the advantage for once."

Elena laughed. "True. But I think I'd be er pass this me, if you don't mind
too much. I'll let you win the next one to make up for it."

"Let me win?" He chuckled. "I don't think so. Next me I'll kick your ass fair
and square." Before she could protest, he added, "I'll be right back."
Tro ng down the steps, he made his way to where the Jeep was parked
along the driveway. It wore a heavy white blanket.

In the me she stood wai ng under the porch overhang, two older couples
she knew also le , stopping to say goodbye to Elena as they walked past.
She shivered under her woolen coat as she watched Damon in the distance
clearing off snow. At long last he pulled up in front of the entrance, jumped
out and came around to open her door. Holding out a hand, he helped her
down the steps and guided her safely inside the vehicle. She gave him a
grateful smile, impressed by all his chivalry.
"I'm sure the main road will be be er," he remarked as the Jeep pushed
through the snow along the driveway. They turned onto Route Four,
heading back toward town. Tire tracks split the layer of white on the
pavement, but it was obvious no plows had been along yet.

Damon was silent, concentra ng on driving. The snow sleeted down in the
glow of his headlights. The rhythmic thump and swish of the windshield
wipers filled the interior; they had their work cut out for them tonight.

They'd only been driving for a li le over five minutes when two spots of
red glowed through the swirling white in front of them. A road block.
Elena's hands clenched into fists as she realized there must have been an
accident up ahead. She prayed there hadn't been any serious injuries, and
was relieved she knew her father and brother were s ll at the Lockwood's.

Pumping the brakes a few mes, Damon pulled over to the shoulder as
smoothly as he could without losing control. "Guess we'll have to find
another way," he said with a frown. "Or should we just go back to the party
and hope the plows get things cleaned up in a few more hours?"

Without any hesita on Elena replied, "No. I know a way. Go back about
half a mile and there'll be a road on the le . I can to get us to my place
from there."

"You really don't want to return, huh?"

She laughed. "I really don't."

Damon made a three-point turn – which actually ended up being more like
a four or five-point turn to keep them out of the ditch – and headed back
the way they'd come. He drove carefully, keeping an eye on the le side of
the highway for a side road. The reduced visibility didn't help.

"There it is," Elena said suddenly, poin ng.

He was almost past it when he spo ed the narrow road, and he hit the
brakes harder than he'd intended. The Jeep began to fish-tail, but Damon
steered into the skid and brought them around the corner safely.

Elena had been in her dad's car in condi ons like this many mes, and
although it made her a bit nervous, a er eighteen winters she was pre y
used to it. And she already knew Damon was a good driver.

"Okay, so we go down this road for a couple miles and then there'll be
another turn on the le . It winds a bit, but will eventually bring us out to
the back side of town." She reached over and switched the stereo on, but
the storm had made the local signal too full of sta c to understand. Damon
hit the CD bu on instead and the thumping of the wiper blades became
lost behind a melodious male voice accompanied by a gentle guitar.

"Oh," Elena said. "This is pre y."

Damon spared a glance her way. "It's Father John Misty. Formerly of Fleet
Foxes. Heard of them?"

She shook her head.

"They're from Sea le. Indie rock. I saw them play live in Richmond two
years ago and they were amazing."

"Huh. Believe it or not, I've never been to a concert," she admi ed.

"Really?" He darted his eyes to her again. "Elena, have you ever been out
of Mys c Falls?"

"Of course! Well, do school trips to a museum in Lynchburg and to see play
in Roanoke count?"

"Um, not really." He chuckled. "That's just-"

"Sad. I know," she finished for him.

"I wasn't going to say sad," he protested.

Elena laughed. "Sure you were. I know I have no life. But I'll be ge ng out
of here for college at the end of summer. Though it sure feels like it right
now, it's really not so far away."

He was just about to speak again, possibly to explain what he really meant
to say, when she loudly interjected, "Crap! There's the turn!"

Too late, the Jeep sailed right on past it. Damon came to a careful stop and
put it in reverse, backing up slowly un l he could nego ate the turn. This
road was in even worse shape than the last one. He suspected there was
now gravel underneath the thick layer of snow instead of pavement.

The driving snowflakes reflected the glow from his headlights back at
them, making seeing their surroundings nearly impossible. Damon tried to
stay in what he assumed was the middle of the road, away from the sides
where they might get stuck. When it bent to the right, he heard Elena
mu er, "Hmm."

"What?"

"Nothing. Just…that didn't seem right. But I haven't been on this road since
last summer."

Now they were on an uphill incline that seemed to be growing steeper.

Then came another sharp curve, this me to the le .

"Huh. I don't know, Damon. I'm star ng to think we must have go en on

the wrong road somehow."

"Should I turn around?" He nudged the brakes.

Elena leaned forward, squin ng through the windshield into the gloom.
"Maybe?"

Damon brought the Jeep to a halt on the slope. As he gripped the steering
wheel and shi ed into reverse again, Elena couldn't help no cing how
white his knuckles were against the black leather. They began to edge
backward, curving to the le as he a empted to make another three-point
turn.

Suddenly the nose swung higher as they slid downhill. Fast.

"Fuck!" Damon exclaimed, as with a crunching sound the rear of vehicle

came to an abrupt stop. Against a snow bank. In what could only be the
ditch.

Father John s ll sang his sweet song, while the headlights illuminated
nothing but swirling clouds of white.

Elena gasped, unable to find her voice to speak.

"Are you okay?" Damon asked anxiously. His eyes were filled with worry.

She inhaled another deep breath and took mental inventory of her body's
well-being. "Yeah," she managed. "You?"

"I'm fine. But I don't think I can get us out of this."

She focused on the posi on of the vehicle. "The back end's in the ditch?"

"Seems that way. I'm really sorry, Elena. Your dad's gonna kill me. You don't
happen to have the number for the nearest tow truck on your phone, do
you?" He reached out to silence the stereo.

She rummaged around on the floor un l she found her clutch – it had
rolled beneath her seat. She groped around inside, but didn't feel her
phone. At first she was confused. Where was her phone? Then she
remembered. "Oh, crap. I forgot. I le it on my dresser earlier. Can I use
yours to call my brother?"

Damon pulled his phone from inside his jacket and handed it to her.
"Thanks," she mu ered. She held her finger over the numbers, but her
mind was blank, s ll in shock maybe. It took her a moment to realize she
didn't actually know his number. It was stored in her phone along with all
the other numbers, but she didn't have it memorized. She stared down at
the keypad, trying to make her brain work, trying to just think.

Finally she handed it back to Damon with a sigh. "I'm sorry. I don't
remember Jer's number. Can you call Zach? Ask him to please look up the
number for Mayor Lockwood's house for us?"

"Don't be sorry. I'm the one who got us stuck." He hit a few bu ons. A er
what seemed like a very long me, Elena heard him speak to his uncle. He
explained the situa on and then waited while Zach went to retrieve the
town directory. A couple minutes later, Damon punched in the Lockwood's
number and returned his phone to Elena. "You'd be er make it quick," he
whispered. "The ba ery's ge ng low."

Her eyes widened as she held it to her ear. Very soon they would be
without a way to communicate. Which might become a serious problem.

"'Lo?" a male voice answered.

"Hi, this is Elena Gilbert calling. Could you please find my father, Grayson
Gilbert, and put him on the phone? It's a bit of an emergency."

"Hold on." She heard the clunk of the receiver being dropped against a
hard surface.

The sound of music and people talking in the background filtered in. The
wait felt like an eternity as Elena eyed Damon with worry. What if his
phone died before her dad got there?

She held her breath and prayed: Pick up, please just pick up already!

"Elena?" It was Grayson, and he sounded alarmed. "What's going on? You
guys alright?"

With a relieved sigh, she said, "Yes, Daddy. We're fine, but we've go en
stuck in a ditch on one of the back roads. We need your help."
She described the route they'd taken and he assured her he would call
Dougie Washburn, who owned Mys c Falls' sole tow truck, to come pull
them out just as soon as he hung up. He was gone before she could explain
that the only phone they had was about to lose its charge.

Handing it back to Damon, Elena pulled her coat ghter around her. "He's
calling the tow truck for us. Hopefully we won't be stranded out here for
long."

Damon pressed his lips into a ght line and looked away.

"What?"

"I hope it's not too long." He sighed, turning back to her. "Because that's
not our only shi y luck tonight. I'm almost out of gas."

Elena sucked in a sharp breath. "Are you kidding?"

"I would not kid you about something like that. I meant to fill up before I
picked you up and was running short on me, so I just figured I'd do it
later." He shook his head, smacking the steering wheel with the palm of his
hand. "I'm such an idiot!"

"How much is le ?"

Damon leaned forward to examine the gauge on the dash. "Not much. We
should probably shut it off to conserve what's remaining, just in case we
get too cold wai ng and need to turn the heat back on."

"Oh." Her brain s ll felt thick. It must be from the wine, she thought. She
wasn't used to drinking.

With clear reluctance, Damon killed the engine. He stretched an arm

behind her into the back seat and retrieved the plaid blanket. "This should
help you keep warm," he told her, unfolding it and spreading it across her
lap.
"What about you?"

He pulled his gloves from his pocket and put them on. "I'll be fine," he
replied grimly.

When the motor stopped, all light from the dashboard and headlights went
off with it. They sat for a few minutes without speaking, listening to the
wind gus ng around the sides of the Jeep and peppering snow pellets
against the glass.

Elena was not dressed to be outdoors in weather like this, but she tried to
conceal her growing chills. Eventually her eyes adjusted to the sparse light
from the white outside reflected into the vehicle. Looking at Damon's
profile as he stared into space, she swore she saw him shivering.

"You're cold."

He glanced at her. "I'm okay."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, don't worry. Someone will show up to pull us out soon."

She thought about the accident out on Route Four, and the road
condi ons, and the people who would be driving on them as they le the
Valen ne's party, and the strong possibility they were not the only ones in
need of help tonight. "It might be a while," she said doub ully.

Damon was quiet for a few moments. Then he turned to her. "Why don't
we play a game to pass the me?"

"What did you have in mind?"

Flashing a mischievous smile, he asked, "Have you ever played Never Have I
Ever?"

Elena's brows shot up in surprise. "No, but I know what it is. Isn't that a
drinking game?"
"Usually, yep. But we can play it without doing shots."

"So instead of drinking, we just admit if we haven't…done stuff, then?"

He exhaled a low chuckle. "I'm game if you are. What d'ya say?"

With her mind s ll fuzzy from alcohol, Elena wasn't sure a game where you
admi ed your life inexperience was such a great idea. On the other hand,
it could be a good opportunity to get to know Damon be er, and it would
help keep them amused while they waited. She shrugged. "Okay. You first."

He thought for a moment. "Never have I ever…worked in a coffee shop."

She laughed. "Well you already know I do, so that one doesn't really count.
Hmm. Never have I ever…smoked a cigare e."

In the dim light she saw one of his eyebrows arch. "I bet you think I have to
take an invisible shot right now. But you'd be wrong."

"Really?" She was definitely not expec ng that.

"Really. My mom had asthma, and my brother has it, too. Smoking was
always verboten, and I never had any urge to try it."

"Huh. Okay, your turn."

"Never have I ever…shot up heroin."

Elena snorted. "That's good to know. Obviously I haven't either."

"Hey, you might have! I don't know what you're like when I'm not around.
Maybe you're a party girl?"

She pulled the blanket up ghter around her. "Never have I ever been a
party girl. Like you ever once thought I was!"

"Me, neither - although I've been to my fair share of par es." He got quiet
as he tried to think of something good. With a lecherous smirk, he said,
"Never have I ever…had a three-way."

Clapping a hand to her mouth, she s fled a laugh. "Um…never have I-'"

"Hold on, you didn't answer my Never!" Damon interrupted.

Her cheeks were hot; it was the only part of her that was right now. "No!
Of course I haven't! I've barely…" She stopped. Was she really prepared to
talk about sex with him? The fog over her mind had started to clear, but
only a li le. She sighed. "I've barely done anything, let alone something
crazy like that."

"Touchy subject?" Elena could hear the smile in his voice.

"No, it's okay." She looked out the window, but could see nothing but
shadows and snow. "We might be stuck here a while. I trust that whatever
we admit from this li le game will be kept in strictest confidence?"

"Of course. Cross my heart." He made mo ons in the shape of an X in front

of his chest.

"Fine." She took a deep breath. "Never have I ever done…um…oral."

Damon's head swiveled toward her. She held her breath, wai ng for the
laugh, wai ng for the shock. She didn't get either. "Truth?"

"Truth."

"You got me on that one," he said evenly, raising his fist toward his mouth
and pretend-shoo ng a drink. He stared at her for a few moments. Then
his voice so ened. "Are you a virgin, Elena?"

She looked away, pursing her lips. "That's a bit personal, isn't it?"

"This whole game is personal. We're ge ng know one another, right? And I
promised I'd never reveal your secrets."
Her mind flashed to Vickie and Tyler's earlier argument. You don't know the
half of my secrets, she thought.

With resigna on, she said, "Since you didn't phrase it with a 'Never have I
ever' I don't think I have to answer that. But I will anyway, just because. No.
I'm not."

"Ah."

Elena turned her face back toward him. "Are you surprised?"

"No, not really. Are you embarrassed to talk about this stuff?"

A wave of shivers came over her. She rearranged the blanket over her lap
again and hoped he hadn't no ced. "It's fine." Another quiet sigh. "Your
turn."

Damon frowned. "You're freezing." He turned the engine back on, and air
began to blow from the vents, making her shake harder. She wanted to tell
him he should save what gas was le , but the idea of heat was just too
temp ng.

They played for a while longer, each trying to keep the subjects as light as
they could manage. Elena learned that Damon had never played football,
eaten at Cracker Barrel or seen The Bachelor. Damon learned that Elena
had never sung karaoke, seen the ocean, or flown in an airplane. By the
me the engine spu ered and stopped, he was imagining taking her on a
trip down to Miami so they could swim in the sea during the day and get
drunk in karaoke bars at night. Just as friends of course. Although she was
incredibly sexy in that red dress that showed so much leg. And just as he
was mentally reprimanding himself for thinking those thoughts, the gas ran
out.

"Don't worry," he blurted. "The tow truck will be here any minute and I'll
pay him to take you home first and then drop the Jeep at the gas sta on.
Everything will be fine."
"D-do I seem worried?"

He looked at her with concern. "You seem cold. I might have another
blanket in the back. Let me look." With that he twisted around and
scrambled over the center console into the backseat, reaching into the
storage space behind it and feeling around. A er a minute, he sighed.
"Nope. Sorry. I guess there's just the one."

Elena swiveled to look at him, eyes wide in the dark. "You're just as cold as
I am, Damon. What if they can't find us for hours yet? It's s ll snowing like
crazy, and I'm not even sure which side road we're on. We could be stuck
here all night!"

He was quiet for a few moments. Then: "Don't freak out."

"I'm not," she replied. She shi ed around so her knees were under her, her
body now facing him. "Stay right there." There was no easy way to do it,
but she tried to keep the blanket around her lower half for the sake of
modesty while she climbed inelegantly into the backseat, finally landing on
the leather beside Damon.

Unwrapping it from her body, she shi ed un l her leg was right beside his
and tucked the thick wool around both of them. "We need to conserve as
much heat as we can."

The moment her body touched his, Damon went s ll; even his breath
seemed freeze in his lungs. Elena wasn't sure if she'd crossed some
invisible boundary, but right now she wasn't sure she cared. Luckily she
didn't have to worry about it for long. A few seconds later he li ed his right
arm and wrapped it around her shoulders, pulling her into his side.

"Is that be er?" she whispered a er a minute or so of…not exactly

awkward, but not totally comfortable silence.

He didn't answer right away. Then he murmured, "Yes. Thank you."

Elena had an idea to help break this new tension between them. "Do you
wanna play some other game to keep us occupied while we wait?"

"What are you thinking?"

"Um. Well, along the same lines as the other one, how about Truth or
Dare?"

Damon chuckled. "That could get real interes ng real fast, considering our
very limited posi on at the moment."

With a smile, she replied, "Something to bear in mind. You go first."

He slid his arm down her back so it rested against her waist, shi ed so his
head was next to hers, ear pressed to the back of the seat, eyes locked on
each other. "Truth or dare, Elena?"

Without hesita on she said, "Truth."

Damon was silent a moment. Then he smiled. "I'll make the first one easy.
What perfume are you wearing?"

"It's…" She stopped herself with a small laugh. "You're going to think it's
weird, but it's actually just an essen al oil I dabbed on my pulse points. My
mom used to use it. It's bergamot."

"It smells fantas c."

"Thanks." Elena smiled as his fingers moved against her side, rubbing
lightly over her thick coat. "My turn. Truth or dare?

He shrugged. "I'll go with truth, too."

"Okay. Do you wear contacts?"

"Yes, occasionally. I usually can't be bothered though. Okay, enough with

the easy ques ons. Time to amp up the difficulty level. Truth or dare?"
Laughing so ly, she said, "I'm s cking with truth."

"Hmm." Elena thought she saw a ghost of a smile in the dim light. "I've got
one. Have you ever been in love?"

"Nope," she answered without even a single second's hesita on. "That
wasn't difficult at all. My turn again. Truth or dare, Damon?"

"Let's live on the edge a li le. Dare."

Elena stared at him and remembered her dream. The wine buzz made her
feel brave, made her feel like just once trying to be someone else,
someone who wasn't always so straight laced. Bonnie's par ng words from
earlier popped into her mind. Kiss a boy, will ya? And she decided maybe
now was a good me to take a leap. What was the worst that could
happen, right?

She took a deep breath. "I dare you to kiss me."

A/N Sorry for the cli anger! Hope you guys liked this chapter. Thanks to
scarle 2112 for prereading for me. Extra huge thanks to all of you who
take the minute out of your life to stop and leave me a review. Reviewers
are the best readers and I love & appreciate all of you! It would mean a lot
to me if you'd let me know what you think. Chapter 8 will hopefully be
worth the wait. Happy Easter to those of you to celebrate it! :)
8. Chapter 8
Chapter 8

"I dare you to kiss me."

Damon's eyes flared. Even in the faint light of the backseat of his Jeep,
Elena could see the ring of white around his irises from his obvious shock.

"You sure?" he whispered a er a moment.

She nodded, just a li le bit, but it was enough.

At first he did nothing, said nothing, simply stared at her waging some
internal ba le with himself. And she couldn't have placed a bet either way
as to how it would come out.

Then he exhaled a sigh, so quiet she almost didn't hear it. His hand res ng
on her waist shi ed up to cup her jaw, the bu ery leather of his glove cool
against her skin. She held her breath as he moved his face closer, stopping
when their noses were maybe an inch apart. She wasn't sure he could see
into her eyes in the gloom, but she could tell he was trying.

Elena's throat was dry. Her heart galloped in circles within its cage, like it
wanted to escape and run away, never to be seen again. At last she
couldn't stand it a second longer. She leaned forward just a li le, un l their
lips touched.

That was all it took. Damon kissed her, his lips so and gentle. He was
tenta ve, careful, and she could tell he s ll wasn't real sure if this was a
good idea or not. But he didn't back off; he didn't try to deepen the kiss,
but he didn't stop it either.

A sense of need began to burn inside her. She wanted more. Elena brought
her hand to his shoulder and tried to tug him closer, par ng her mouth
against his. She felt him hesitate, felt him freeze, and with chagrin knew he
was about to retreat. For an excrucia ngly long moment neither of them
moved. She tried to not even breathe, lest it p their precarious balance
and chase him away. Her heart throbbed in her ears as she waited to see
what he'd do.

All at once she felt a clear shi in the energy between them. The p of
Damon's tongue traced her lower lip as his fingers splayed into her hair. As
Elena lted her head to the side to allow him be er access, their noses
bumped. She smiled against his lips, had to hold back a nervous giggle in
fact, but he didn't pull away. She'd forgo en all about feeling cold – at the
moment her internal temperature was rising fast. Their tongues touched
and she heard a so moan. Did that come from her? Oh God, it was clear
the wine had made her go a li le crazy tonight!

Her fingers dri ed from his shoulder up to his neck. The whole mood,
intensity, everything had changed. They both knew it, but neither was
ready to put a stop to it. Not yet. He sighed against her mouth and slid his
tongue along the side of hers. He tasted of whiskey and coffee and she just
couldn't get enough. Her right knee shi ed as if of its own accord up over
his leg, coming to rest in his lap, forcing the hem of her dress to ride up.

Elena grew braver. Her thumb stroked circles on the side of his neck. She
ran her fingers into his hair at the same me as his hand slipped under the
blanket to grasp the back of her thigh, pulling her leg against his waist,
opening her up further. Their lips and tongues danced, and she pressed
herself wantonly against his hip, searching for some release from the
pressure she felt building within.

Just then headlights illuminated the inside of the vehicle and they shot
away from each other like two magnets of matching polarity. Elena nearly
groaned in disappointment at the sight of their suddenly not-so-welcome
rescuer. If only he'd been delayed just a few more minutes, she thought
with frustra on. Wiping his lips, Damon scrambled over the center console
and arranged himself back into the driver's seat. She straightened her skirt
and ran her fingers over her hair, trying to refocus her mind, calm her
heartbeat, even out her breathing.
Oh my God. Had she really just about climbed into Damon's lap, rubbing
herself against him like a cat in heat? What the hell was wrong with her?
Her face burned with embarrassment as she tucked the blanket around her
legs again, pushing her back against the seat and inhaling deep cold
breaths as the tow truck stopped in front of them.

Without a word, Damon got out, wrenched open the rear door and offered
his hand to help her climb outside. The snow in the ditch was deep – up to
his knees - and he li ed her with seeming ease over the bank and onto the
edge of the road. As Elena watched him clamber over the hard packed
snow to greet their new arrival, she glanced nervously at Dougie
Washburn, wondering if he'd no ced she'd emerged from the back instead
of the front. She was pre y sure he hadn't – he was too busy hooking
Damon's Jeep up to his tow truck.

Before long they had squished into the warm cab of the truck and were on
their way back to Mys c Falls. Space was limited. Their thighs and
shoulders pressed together and Damon's le arm rested along the back of
the seat behind Elena so they would both fit onto the passenger side of the
bench seat. Damon made small talk with Dougie a li le, but neither he nor
Elena spoke to each other.

When they finally pulled up in front of her house, Damon helped Elena
down from the high seat, but once on the ground, dropped her hand,
walking beside her to the door.

"Damon…" she started, wan ng to break past the weirdness that had
se led between them.

"I'll talk to you tomorrow," he cut in firmly. "Not too early though."

"Thanks for being my date. I had a great night."

His eyebrows shot up. "I got us stuck in a ditch in a snowstorm. Not sure
that qualifies as a great night."
Elena s fled a yawn. "It wasn't so bad. If I had to be stuck with someone,
I'm glad it was you. And it all worked out."

"Yeah." He sighed. "You should go in and get some sleep. I'll text you when
I get home. Goodnight, Elena."

She badly wished he'd lean in and kiss her again, though she was astute
enough to know he wouldn't. Because no ma er what had happened at
the end of it, it had not been a date. Instead she just offered a small and
sleepy smile. "Night."

A hard winter sun shone through the cracks in her blinds and cast too-
bright lines across her bed, rousing Elena from a restless sleep. Her first
thought was that she was thirsty. Her second was that ge ng up seemed
like too much effort and she'd rather just go back to sleep. She turned over,
squin ng at the clock on her nightstand through bleary eyes. With an
alarmed groan she realized it was past eleven. Then her eyes shot wide as
a third much more alarming thought kicked in. Rolling onto her back, she
stared at the ceiling, her fingers unconsciously pressing against her lips as
she recalled the events of the night before.

"Oh God," she murmured, clapping a hand over her eyes as memories of
being with Damon in the backseat of his Jeep flooded over her. Her face
grew hot. What had she done?

Stretching out blind fingers toward her night table, she groped for her
phone, pulling it to her at the same me as her other hand dragged the
covers over her head. In the dim light below the blankets she saw he'd
texted her at just a er two-thirty in the morning. Home safe & sound. Talk
to you tomorrow.

Elena sighed. It was now tomorrow. What exactly were they going to say to
each other next me they spoke? Would they just pretend the kiss never
happened, act like everything was normal? Or would he want to discuss it?
And if he did, how would that even go?
She sighed again, returning the phone back to the table. Her head fell hard
against her pillow. If only she could just fall back into oblivious sleep, but
unfortunately that wasn't an op on. She just had too much to do to lie in
bed agonizing over every detail of last night. And it would serve no purpose
other than frustra on.

Dragging herself from the warmth of her blankets, she stumbled with half-
lidded eyes down the hall to the bathroom. A shower, followed by a cup of
strong coffee, would help clear her head. She needed to figure out what
she would say to Damon if he brought their kiss up. Because as fabulous –
as mind-blowing – as it had been, it couldn't happen again. It wouldn't be
fair to either of them if they started something she would have to put an
end to in a few months. It would just cause unnecessary pain, and she
refused to do that to him. Or to herself.

A er a hot shower, Elena sat in the kitchen skimming through the paper as
she enjoyed her toast and much-needed coffee. Both her father and
Jeremy were out, presumably at church, and she was grateful they had let
her sleep in and skip today's service.

She glanced up when her phone buzzed on the tabletop.

Damon: How are you feeling today?

She replied, Be er now, thanks. You?

Elena was rinsing off her dishes in the sink, about to go pull out her
homework, when another text came through.

Is it okay if I pop by?

She frowned. She did want to talk to him. It wasn't going to be an easy
conversa on, but it needed to get out of the way so they could go back to
being friends - if he s ll wanted to be her friend a er hearing what she had
to say. She tried to ignore the part of her heart that jumped at the thought
of seeing him again soon, especially a er what had happened the night
before. If they were going to be able to maintain a successful friendship
she'd have to get a be er handle on her reac ons to him.

Somehow she missed the sound of her father's car pulling up in the
driveway. The front door opened and Grayson and Jeremy came inside,
le ng in a blast of arc c air as they stomped snow from their boots onto
the rubber mat.

"Good a ernoon Sleeping Beauty." Her father greeted her with a wide
smile.

She returned his grin. "Thanks for not waking me up for church today, guys.
I appreciate it."

"I figured you deserved it a er last night. But don't scare me like that
again, okay?"

"I won't." Then she remembered Damon's text. Having a private and
important conversa on with her family in the house would be difficult.
"Can I borrow the car for a few hours? I want to go check in on Damon."

Her dad's smile widened and he tossing her his keys. "It's all yours. Don't
take any back roads, though."

"I don't plan on it. Thanks Dad."

Elena picked up her phone and texted back:

How about I come to you instead? Just tell me when.

A minute later, he sent: Okay. I'll be here all a ernoon, so drop by any me.

As she walked down the hallway to her bedroom to change into something
a tad more presentable than her current a re of leggings and an old
hoodie, she typed, See you in 20.
The laneway leading up to the Salvatore boarding house was nearly as long
as the Lockwood's. Elena drove carefully, although it had been plowed
since the storm the previous night. Sunlight glinted off the layer of fresh
snow across the wide front lawn; it glimmered like a field of diamonds.

She pulled up in front of the large Tudor mansion and parked beside
Damon's Jeep. There were a few scratches in the paint on the back end,
and the bumper was twisted and dented, but she was relieved to note it
didn't appear to have sustained much damage otherwise.

Her boots crunched on the hard packed snow of the walkway leading up to
the big wooden front door. A tarnished and an que-looking iron door
knocker in the shape of a lion's head was mounted right in the center of it.
Elena examined it for a moment before li ing the heavy ring and banging it
firmly against the metal, once, twice, then a third me for good measure.

For a few moments she waited, shi ing her weight from foot to foot, her
cheeks rosy from the nip in the air. At last she heard the squeak of the old
hinges as the door was pulled wide. Damon stood framed within, squin ng
against the sudden glare.

"Hey. Come on in."

Elena stepped into the gloom of the entranceway, the large door making a
resounding thud as he shut it behind her. She was temporarily blinded
from the sudden change from bright to dim, and reached for the wall to
steady herself as her eyes adjusted.

"Be er leave your coat on for now. This old place doesn't hold heat very
well."

Damon led her into the cavernous drawing room. The vaulted ceiling was
high above, and she could see the polished oak railing along an upper floor
hallway. The en re room was paneled in dark wood with pain ngs of local
landscapes decora ng the walls. Strategically placed high-backed leather
furniture bracketed a large fieldstone fireplace. It was meant to look rus c
and welcoming, but in Elena's opinion was far too spacious to be cozy.
"Do you want the full tour?" he asked.

She wasn't sure if she really did, but to be polite she agreed. Truthfully she
just wanted to get the conversa on they needed to have over with, so she
could go back to feeling comfortable around him, instead of this crazy
tension that crept over her every me she looked his way.

The house was far too large for the two men living in it. She couldn't
imagine how Zach must have rambled around in this place alone before
Damon moved in. Just as he had warned, most of the rooms were chilly,
and Elena was glad she'd taken his advice and le her jacket on. She pulled
it more closely around her as they walked through the dining room,
kitchen, si ng room and library. In the study a fire was burning merrily,
and Damon's uncle sat reading the paper in an overstuffed armchair pulled
up close to it. Zach greeted her politely, offering her a drink, which she
declined, and asking a er her father before Damon ushered her out to
con nue the tour.

At last they got to his bedroom. Her heart rate sped up as, with one arm
outstretched, he held the door open for her and she had to pass close to
his body to enter. In keeping with the design of the rest of the house, his
room was also large and furnished with plenty of polished wood. Elena was
pleased to see another fire burning in the fireplace across from the foot of
his bed. The bed itself was huge – king-sized at least, with four thick
mahogany posters delinea ng each corner. A light gray duvet covered it,
and a thick book with a leather bookmark s cking out sat on one of the
pillows. A precariously balanced stack of more books filled the lower shelf
of the bedside table. The en re room smelled of an en cing combina on
of burning wood, leather and a faint hint of Damon's cologne. Now this
room - this was truly her idea of cozy.

Elena walked over and plopped down on the rug in front of the fireplace,
shedding her coat and folding it over the back of the chair by her feet. The
heat radia ng from the fire warmed her en re body. It felt amazing; she
was tempted to just stretch out like a cat and nap right here all a ernoon.
Damon took a seat on the end of his bed and looked over at her.

"Sooo…" they both started at the same me. Then they laughed.

"Sorry," he said. "Ladies first." He swept a hand in her direc on, urging her
to con nue.

"About last night…"

"Last night. Yeah."

"Yeah," Elena sighed. "Not the ge ng stuck part, but the…other part."

His mouth curved into a knowing grin. "The other part? You mean the part
where you dared me to kiss you?"

She bit her lip. "Um, yeah. That. So, the thing is-"

"I'm not looking for a girlfriend, Elena. I got out of a rough situa on last
year, and I'm just not in the right place mentally for something like that
right now. I value your friendship a lot, but…"

With a small grin, she cut in. "I thought you were going to let me talk first?"

He flushed and nodded, focusing on the flames crackling behind the grate.
"Right, right. Sorry. Go on."

"It's funny you should say that though, because I was about to tell you
something similar. Not about previous rela onships, but I'm going to be
leaving for school in August – at least I hope so – and I have so much to do
between now and then. Between work and studying, I don't have much
free me, and I have to keep my grades up so I can earn a scholarship. I
promised myself I'd focus just on my schoolwork un l the end of senior
year. And I don't want to get too a ached to anyone and then have to
leave. It wouldn't be fair to either of us." She'd been talking rapidly, and
when she stopped she took a deep breath and fell silent.
Damon met her eyes and gave her a ght smile. "Okay, perfect. Friends it
is, then."

"So we're good?"

"Yeah. Great. I was worried I might… well I didn't want to have to

disappoint you. That would've sucked if I'd wrecked our burgeoning
friendship over something as silly as one li le kiss." He was s ll smiling, but
his eyes were serious.

"Yeah, I was kind of concerned about that, too. But I'm glad you feel the
same way." She rose to her feet and picked up her coat, moving toward the
door. "On that note though, I should probably get home and do some
actual studying this a ernoon."

Damon walked with her to the front door. "Next me bring your books
with you. You can study here if you ever need some peace and quiet. I
promise to not bug you too much – I'll just read and keep your mug of hot
chocolate filled."

She considered his sugges on for a few seconds, thinking about her
brother and his friends playing noisy videogames in her living room on
certain Sunday a ernoons. "I might just take you up on that," she told him.
"Have a good rest of your day, Damon."

Elena got into her dad's car and started the engine, but she didn't shi it
into Reverse right away. Something as silly as one li le kiss, he'd said.
Truthfully his words had stung, much to her intense frustra on. Their kiss
hadn't felt either silly or minor. At the me, it had actually felt pre y major,
and she'd had to work hard a erward to convince herself it had been a
mistake. To know he also thought it was a mistake hurt more than she
wanted to admit.

But it was for the best. Just being friends was the very most they could be
to each other, anyway. And she could do it. Sure he was a rac ve, and she
was pre y sure there was a spark between them that went both ways - at
least last night there certainly had been - but it wasn't like she was in love
with him. Hell, she'd never been in love with anyone, ever, and she
certainly wasn't going to start now. Not when her very future depended on
her ability to succeed academically.

They were friends. And it was all good.

Dammit.

Damon felt kind of strange a er Elena le . He knew he should be relieved

she thought last night's kiss was no big deal, and that she agreed they
should just be friends and nothing more. And he was relieved. Well,
mostly. There was a small part of him that felt a bit…disappointed.

That night he lay in bed for a long me listening to the sounds of the
massive old house se le around him and the faint spits and crackles as the
dying embers smoldered in the fireplace. It was not the first me he'd had
trouble sleeping because all the ski ering thoughts in his head wouldn't
shut up – not by a long shot – but it was the first night in a very long me
that his thoughts were not tormented by hurt and anger over Stefan and
Katherine's betrayal.

To distract himself, he tried to come up with some sort of plan for his
future. When that failed, he switched on the light and a empted to get
immersed in his book. He even wrote, then crumpled up, three different
versions of a rambling and incoherent le er to Miss Lonely Love.

Some me in the wee hours before dawn, Damon at last fell into a listless
sleep.

At one point he dreamed he was back at the Valen ne's party, dancing
with Elena. This me her body was pressed against him, her face close to
his. She smelled incredible. Like strawberries. And sex.

He gulped. Every inch of him was very aware of, and very turned on by, her
proximity. And she knew it. Insistent fingers tugged at the hair on the nape
of his neck, trying to bring his lips down to hers.
"Your dad…" he managed to mumble, doing his best to resist while all
these oblivious strangers twirled in circles around them. But all he wanted
was to give in. He wanted to kiss her more than anything right now - not to
men on doing other, more sinful things to her. She looked absolutely
edible in that ght red dress that showcased every curve. And those long
shapely legs…all he could think about was those legs wrapped around him.

It was as if she could read his mind. She smiled at him, a sexy, dangerous
li le smile that was full of dirty, dirty promises. Then she stepped back and
took his hand, lacing her fingers through his and leading him out of the
room, into the front hallway, and then up the stairs as fast as her high-
heels could go. He found he had no trouble keeping up.

The lights were off in the hallway upstairs, making it difficult to see where
she was taking him. Elena dragged him along un l she stopped abruptly in
front of a door. His heart raced as she pulled it open and tugged him inside.
As soon as the door closed behind them, he took over, pushing her against
the nearest wall and a acking her lips, diving his fingers into her hair,
messing her perfect curls, claiming her.

She moaned into his mouth as she ran her hands inside his jacket and up
his chest to the collar of his shirt. Instead of unbu oning it, she grabbed
each side and yanked, sending bu ons flying as she tore it open.

Damon pulled back a few inches and stared at her with equal measures of
awe and lust. He didn't think he'd ever been more turned on in his en re
life.

He picked her up and spun her around, bringing her to rest on her back on
the nearby bed. Lowering his body to hers, he kissed her again, hard,
determined, his free hand roaming her body, finally caressing those
luscious curves he'd been distracted by all night. He found the hem of her
dress and pulled the fabric up to her waist, running his fingers over the so
skin of her bare thigh as he went.

Elena gasped and dove her small tongue into his mouth, li ing her hips as
he ground himself against her. Lord Almighty – this girl was going to kill him
before this night was through! His brain went into overdrive, filled with one
thought and one thought only: he needed to be inside her; he needed it
right the fuck now. And from her urgent movements below him and the
breathy mews she was making, she needed it just as much as he did.

He slid his fingers under the elas c at the side of her pan es and dragged
them down her thighs, tossing them over his shoulder into the dark. With
increasing despera on, he then reached between them and unzipped his
pants. She grasped the waistband and pushed them down, as eager as he
was to free him from his confines.

Just as her nimble fingers found their way inside his boxer-briefs, the sound
of the ringing boarding house phone woke him up.

He blinked, at first confused by the early morning sunshine beaming

through the crack in his curtains. Pushing his head back into his pillow, he
wrapped an arm over his eyes and groaned. It was just a dream. But, what
a fucking dream!

Damon sighed. Too bad it was never going to happen.

Dreams could be fun as hell, but they could also confuse the waking mind.
He didn't need confusion. He needed to stay focused on the promises he'd
made to himself. He needed to remember that he'd made them for some
very good reasons.

But damn.

Hauling his reluctant ass from the warmth of his bed, he headed for the
bathroom and considered a cold shower. Be er yet, maybe he should just
go outside and throw himself groin-first into a snow bank. That would
surely clear his…um…head.

A strong cup of coffee, a bagel, an intense workout and shower later and
Damon at last started to feel like his usual self again. He wondered if Miss
Lonely Love would get his le er today. And he found himself hoping like
hell she'd write back.
A/N Hope you liked this chapter. Things between these two are definitely
star ng to get complicated. ;) Big thanks to scarle 2112 for prereading and
LoveDE for proofreading. Love you both. Huge thanks to everyone has has
reviewed and favourited and recced this li le fic out. You guys are beyond
awesome! Please let me know what you thought of this chapter by leaving
a review in the li le box below. Have a wonderful weekend!
9. Chapter 9
Chapter 9

The lunch bell rang, startling Elena out of her thoughts about the Salem
Witch Trials. Mr. Tanner stopped his lecture mid-sentence as in a mad
cacophony her fellow students slammed their books shut and rushed for
the door. Bonnie fell into step beside Elena in the hallway en route to their
lockers.

"So?" she asked with a curious smile.

"So what?" Elena replied, though she knew exactly what her friend was
referring to.

"So how was the Lockwood's party? How did your date with Damon go?"

"I told you it wasn't a date," Elena whispered fiercely as they turned the
corner and entered the stairwell.

"Yeah, you keep saying that. Well? How was it? Did you dance with him at
least?"

"Yes, we danced. It was…" She trailed off with a sigh.

"What? It was what?" Bonnie almost walked right into a tall boy in front of
them because she was staring at Elena, trying to analyze her facial
expression.

"Hold on." Elena led her out a side door and onto the back lawn, hurrying
away from the crowd of kids already gathering right outside the entrance.
Once they were out of earshot of others, she confessed to Bonnie what
had happened at the party with Vickie, with Damon, and everything
a erward.

"Holy shit," Bonnie exclaimed, eyebrows nearly in her hairline.

"Yeah."

"I can't believe you dared him to kiss you! Where did that side of you come
from? The wine?"

Elena's face was hot. She studied her fingernails and nodded. "I can't
believe I did either."

"Is he a good kisser? Did you take a pic of the two of you for me, like I
asked?"

"Oh God yeah. And yes." Elena pulled out her phone and showed Bonnie
the photo Jeremy had texted her the previous day.

Bonnie sucked in her breath before raising wide eyes back to her friend.
"That's Damon? Jesus, girl. You lucky li le shit. Please don't say you
chickened out and told him you just wanted to be friends a er? Don't you
dare tell me that!"

"Um…"

"You didn't!"

"I'm sorry to disappoint you, Bon. But yeah. It wasn't only me – he just
wants to be friends, too. He said he's not looking for anything right now."

Bonnie laughed. "They always say that at first. Guys like that hate
commitment. I'm sure he s ll wants to get in your pants, though. What
about friends with benefits? Is that an op on? Cause damn!"

Elena shook her head, flushing deeper. "Just friends. And I'm totally cool
with that, honest. I don't know that he hates commitment - I think his ex
just really did a number on him, although he doesn't talk about it and I
don't want to ask." Something scratched at the back of her mind at that
thought, but it fled just as fast.

Bonnie looked doub ul. She shrugged. "If you say so."
"I do. But he is cute, isn't he?"

Bonnie took Elena's arm and led her back toward the door closest to the
cafeteria. "Ma is cute," she whispered, leaning close. "This guy is in a
whole different stratosphere from mere 'cute', Elena. I wanna meet this
hot friend of yours who also happens to be an amazing kisser. I expect you
to introduce us. ASAP."

Elena giggled, agreeing as they headed back inside.

Wednesday evening was slow at the shop. Elena stood behind the counter
cha ng with Mr. Donnelly as she washed and dried the coffee pots. She
had hoped Damon might stop by, but so far there had been no sign of him.
Maybe he was giving her some space a er the weekend's intense ac vi es
and conversa ons. If so, she totally couldn't blame him for staying away.

A er Mr. Donnelly had gone home, she pulled the le ers out of her
knapsack that she'd picked up from her editor at The Herald on her way to
work. She rifled through them, a wide smile surfacing when she no ced
the familiar crow-scratch handwri ng.

She read it over twice, a bit surprised by the content. This one was much
more conversa onal than JAI's previous le ers. He told her about his
rela onship with his ex, the one who had screwed around on him with his
brother. It was clear from his words how deeply he'd loved her, and it
made Elena feel angry on his behalf. What kind of a girl could do that to
their do ng boyfriend? Not one who really loved him, or cared much about
his feelings, Elena thought.

It ended with two simple words: Your turn.

Which meant he wanted her to share something personal with him. But
what should she write about? Her mother's death? No, she was definitely
not ready to relive that. Ma ? Not interes ng enough. What had she ever
even done that was sufficiently remarkable to tell him about? Also, she had
to remember to maintain Miss Lonely Love's happily married persona. It
wouldn't do to get tripped up in any lies.

Elena thought about it for a while, but couldn't se le on what to say, so

she tucked his le er away to consider later. She worked on her History
paper for over an hour with no interrup ons. Business was always slow on
cold winter weeknights, but she couldn't help worrying about her father's
cash flow right now. Two bills had shown up this week with the words 'Past
Due" stamped in red on the envelope. And those were just the ones she'd
no ced. There could be easily more that her father had grabbed before she
ever saw them. Not that late payments were unusual for them, but she
couldn't help feeling that this winter things were ghter than ever. Her
father always brushed off any of her ques ons about it, though. He was a
proud man, and didn't want anyone to think he couldn't take care of his
family on his own. But Elena wasn't dumb - they were barely scraping by.
Even having to pay Bonnie to work last Saturday night so they could go to
the Lockwood's was an addi onal expense she knew her dad didn't need.

No other customers came in before closing me. Much as she wished

Damon's lack of appearance didn't faze her, she s ll felt a queer sense of
melancholy as she locked up and began her frosty walk home.

Later, once Elena was tucked into her nice, warm bed, she finished her
math homework, yawned, then reached to turn out the lamp. For some
reason her fingers hesitated over the switch. Instead they stretched down
to the floor, feeling around for her bag to pull out JAI's most recent le er.
She read it over again. Something about the tone of his words made her
want to reach out to him, to connect. But what to say? She sighed, folding
it and pu ng it on her nightstand before digging out her ta ered loose-
leaf notebook and pen from the drawer.

Elena sat up straighter against her pillows and propped it up on her thighs.
With no specific plan in mind she began to write.

Dear JAI,
I was pleased to receive your le er earlier. I'm so glad you decided to write
me again.

Honestly, a er reading it I can't help feeling like your ex-girlfriend took

advantage of you. I'm sorry your first experience with love ended the way it
did. I know it's probably hard to believe, but most women out there are
nothing like her. You shouldn't write all of us off just because of one
(admi edly horrible) rela onship.

Are you s ll hanging out with the girl you'd men oned in you previous
le er you recently met? How is that going? Or have you got her locked up
ght in the 'Just Friends' box because of your ex? And if so, are you sure
that's truly what you want?

Anyway, I'll drop it for now but rest assured I'll probably keep asking you
hard ques ons and giving you my opinion if we con nue to correspond. It's
kind of what I do best.

So, my turn, you said. I've been wracking my brain trying to decide what
about me might be worth sharing. Then I realized the 'worth sharing' bit is
why I was struggling. We don't know each other, so therefore we can
choose to write about whatever we please.

In stark contrast to your own childhood, I grew up poor. Well, I didn't

actually understand that we were poor un l I got older. My parents both
worked, and they managed to make ends meet, but we kids didn't know
how ght it was for them some months. Later, a er a terrible tragedy
struck our family, things got even ghter. I started working as a young teen
in order to help make sure our bills got paid and food was on the table. I
didn't mind though – I wanted to do my part and I knew my family
appreciated my contribu on.

When I was young it was ins lled in me that if I wanted to get anywhere in
life, I'd have to work hard and not rely on other people to help me out. My
mom and I used to have long talks about my future – not just what she
wanted for me, but what I wanted, and how best to achieve it. Though we
didn't have much money, they both supported my desire to go to college
and be er myself.

Not sure why I'm telling you all this? I guess it's just to show you that
anything is possible. I hope that you don't become too jaded about fixing
things with your brother, or about falling in love again. Don't give up hope
you'll one day be able to live your dreams.

If I could get past the many obstacles standing in my way to find love and
happiness and the life I wanted, then I feel certain that you can too. I hope
eventually you will let yourself open up to loving again. Loving means
making yourself vulnerable to another human being, and while I know
you're not ready for that right this very moment, I want that for you
someday. Because you deserve it.

So think about that girl you just met. Or some other girl, who you maybe
pass on the sidewalk, or lives up the street, or hands you your coffee every
morning on your way to work. Think about telling your past hurts to go
take a flying leap because you're stronger than they are, and you're going
to go out there and live your life however you darn well please.

I realize all this is easy to say from where I'm standing, but difficult to
actually go out and do. But before you write me off (and stop wri ng to
me) please just give my words some thought.

Hope to hear from you again.

Good luck!

Miss LL

Elena narrowed her eyes and she read it over, trying to determine if it
came off the way she had intended. She'd done her best to make it sound
like it had been wri en by a woman ten years her senior, who was content
with the life she now led and had wisdom to impart. It certainly didn't
sound like how her friends talked to each other, so she figured she'd
probably succeeded. Slipping it into her bag to mail in the morning, she
turned off the lamp and rolled over to sleep.

Damon was always kind of edgy anymore, but the past few days he'd been
even more restless than usual. He'd spent so many hours in the gym that
most of his muscle groups were staging a protest. He'd go en through
three thick-ish books. He read the newspapers – both the Herald and the
Richmond Times, cleaned his bedroom and bathroom thoroughly, and
played at least two, if not more, intense games of chess with his uncle.
Daily. Zach had asked him several mes why he was so fidgety, but he
didn't have any real answers to give. His uncle, more like him than Damon
had ever realized before, didn't press the issue.

Wednesday evening he found himself lying flat on his back on top of his
bed, staring at the circular pa erns in the plaster of the ceiling and
thinking about Elena. He hadn't spoken to her since she'd le the boarding
house on Sunday a er they'd confirmed they both wanted no more than
friendship with each other. It wasn't that he'd been deliberately avoiding
her. Well okay, maybe he had, but only a li le. A er the smokin' hot kiss
they'd shared in the backseat of his Jeep Saturday night, and then deciding
a er that it had been a mistake, he just didn't want things between them
to be awkward. So he was giving her a li le bit of space, staying away from
the coffee shop for now. But he had no inten on of making it a permanent
thing.

It had only been three days. How was it possible he missed seeing her face
so much a er only three days? Had she really become so important in his
life? Or was it just because he had no one else, with the excep on of his
uncle, to talk to anymore?

With a sigh, he rolled off the bed and tro ed down the steps. As he passed
the doorway to the study, he told Zach he was going out to get some air.
Then he grabbed his pea coat and hat and headed into the night.
Ten minutes later Damon sat in his Jeep rubbing his hands together for
warmth though the heater pumped hot air through the vents. He'd parked
along the curb in the dark zone between two streetlights across the street
and down a bit from Gilbert's Coffee Clutch. The light from the windows
shone canted rectangles onto the packed-snow sidewalk, the hand-painted
le ering on the glass making backwards shadows in the glow like some
secret message in strange code.

He wasn't close enough to be no ced by anyone glancing outside, but he

could make out Elena pouring coffee for a couple of middle aged guys
si ng at a side table. Her dark hair was up in a ponytail, and she wore a
deep red sweater and jeans. She looked amazing in red; it brought to mind
how beau ful she'd looked in her dress at the Valen ne's party.

She smiled, then her mouth opened in a laugh at something the men said
to her. As she turned to walk away, one of them reached out and rubbed
her backside. Damon frowned, his body going rigid the moment he saw it.
He grabbed the door handle with every inten on of jumping out and
rushing in there to defend her honor. Elena, however, didn't need a knight
in shining armor (or black felt as the case might be) to come to her rescue -
she slapped the offending hand away without even glancing back, as
casually as if she were swa ng off a fly. Her smile never faltered, although
Damon now doubted its veracity.

He couldn't help but grin, too. She was a strong willed girl, something he
really liked about her. She didn't put up with bullshit, she knew what she
wanted and she went a er it. So did Katherine – God, he knew that be er
than anyone – but Elena was nothing like Katherine. Not as far as he could
tell, anyway. She genuinely cared about other people. She wasn't the type
to lie or cheat. He was sure of that much about her already.

A few minutes later the guys threw their money on the table and got up to
go. Elena cleared away their mugs and wiped down the formica. It looked
like she was either talking or singing to herself as she worked. Damn, she
was pre y.
A flash of memory ski ered across his mind of her writhing below him on a
strange bed. His dream from Monday morning. Or had that been
Katherine? Maybe his traitorous imagina on had conjured up some
strange combina on of the two. Didn't ma er either way – both were
terrible choices of dream partners, for very different reasons.

Damon felt kind of guilty for watching her without her knowledge. If she
happened to spot him, he was sure she'd think it creepy, or worse, that he
was some kind of stalker. That was the last thing he wanted. He wasn't
even sure why he'd come here, but he'd certainly had no untoward
inten ons. Maybe he'd just needed to see her face for a few minutes. She
was sweeping the floor when he shi ed the Jeep into drive and decided to
head back home.

Thursday night at the Clutch there was once again no sign of Damon. A er
Mr. and Mrs. Clancy le and she had the shop to herself, Elena pulled out
her laptop, deciding to distract herself from wondering about him by
wri ng her responses for her column.

She picked out four and replied to them as best she could. Before she could
close her Gmail, a new message popped up. Clicking it open, she read it
and flushed. Another sex ques on. Another girl out there somewhere in
the vicinity of Mys c Falls who needed advice, who wanted her advice. And
another girl who wasn't going to get any.

This one's boyfriend had been asking her to perform oral sex on him, and
she was willing to, but didn't know how to do it right. She'd read some
stuff online, but wrote that it wasn't super helpful. So she wanted Miss
Lonely Love to give her some ps. Unfortunately Elena was in no place to
be able to offer any sugges ons, because she'd never done that, either.

Reading that message got her thinking again about her own lack of sexual
experience. She felt bad that she couldn't give any advice to these girls.
Elena sighed. She filed the e-mail away with the one from a few weeks ago
and closed her laptop, bending down to cram it into her knapsack in
frustra on. Very li le bothered her more than not being able to help out
people who needed it.

Just as her thoughts were turning to Vickie, the bell over the front door
jingled signaling a customer. Elena straightened up fast, welcoming smile
plastered into place. When she saw who it was brushing the snow from his
shoulders, the smile grew wider, became authen c.

As Damon approached the counter, she glanced at the clock above the
door behind him. "Pushing it a li le close, aren't you?" she teased.

He laughed. "Would you believe I was in the neighborhood? Saw the me

and thought I'd see if you could use a li home."

"Really?" She sounded skep cal, but pleased.

"I'd never lie to you." He noted her raised eyebrow. "I was picking up some
stuff at the Easy Mart and figured I'd pop in. Hope that's okay?"

Elena nodded, s ll smiling, secretly delighted once again by his

though ulness. "A ride would be great, thanks. Let me get my coat."

The night was crisp and clear as she locked the door behind them.
Twinkling pinpoints of starlight speckled the black sky, Orion perpetually
chasing the Pleiades to the west above the rounded silhoue es of the
mountains.

She blew out a foggy white breath as they walked to Damon's Jeep. Tonight
it wore no snow to clean off, and much to her pleasure was s ll nice and
warm inside. Elena couldn't resist a surrep ous glance into the backseat
as she slid onto the passenger seat. Heat bloomed on her cheeks as she
remembered the feel of his lips on hers - not to men on how she'd nearly
climbed on top of him. The wine had made her a li le crazy that night.
Ugh. So embarrassing, especially in light of their conversa on on Sunday.

"How's your week been?" he asked conversa onally as he started the

engine.
"Calculus test. Salem Witch Trials paper. Collec on of poems due Monday.
Typical high school stuff. I'm sure you don't miss it."

He chuckled. "Not that much, no. Although I never hated school. Most of it
came fairly easy to me, especially English. If you want a second pair of eyes
on the poetry, I'd be happy to look it over."

Depends what I write them about, she thought. Out loud she said, "Maybe.
I'll keep it in mind."

The drive to her house was short and they pulled up against the sidewalk a
few moments later. He put the Jeep into park and swiveled his upper body
to face her, but didn't say anything. His expression was impassive. Again,
she wished she had some sort of telepathic ability to read his thoughts.

"Well...thanks for the ride, Damon." Elena held his gaze but didn't move
her fingers to the door handle.

"No problem." He just looked at her, s ll giving away nothing about what
was going on behind those intense blue eyes.

She bit the inside of her lower lip. They had confirmed to each other they
wanted to be friends, so why did this feel so damn awkward? They needed
to get past this weirdness post haste. Or at least she did.

"Is the offer to study at your place s ll open?" she blurted. Maybe
spending more me together would help speed them back to their
previous comfortable rapport. It was worth a shot.

Damon's eyebrows li ed and one side of his mouth curved up in a half

smile. "Sure. Mi casa es su casa."

"Pardon?"

With a laugh he replied, "It just means you're welcome any me. Not that
you have much free me. When did you have in mind?"
"Um, this weekend? I can text you when I know be er." Now she did reach
for the door.

"Okay. Have a good night Elena."

"'Night."

The Gilbert house was quiet. Not silent, but quiet. The normal subtle late
night sounds that signaled all was well provided dull white noise to Elena's
tumultuous thoughts. As she lay in bed, again shivering under mul ple
blankets, two very different things kept playing leap-frog over one another
in her head. One was of the handsome guy she'd just le . The other was
about those par cular le ers to Miss Lonely Love that she wasn't able to
reply to.

She blew out a frustrated sigh, thinking of her one and only sexual
experience with Ma a year and a half ago. If she knew more about the
subject, she might be in a be er posi on to give advice to these girls who
wrote in. To be honest, it also probably wouldn't hurt to be less naïve
about such things when she went off to college in the fall. She'd make new
friends, possibly far more sophis cated and experienced ones, and she
didn't want to come off like some naïve li le country girl.

It was late and Elena couldn't sleep, so she let her mind relax and float off
to places where she might not normally let it wander. The way she saw it,
the only way to solve this issue would be for her to do some prac cal
research. Field research, you might call it. Like a science experiment. She'd
need to have sex again in order to try to become more educated on the
subject, to figure out what was good and what wasn't. But how could she
go about ge ng the experience she wanted without messing up all her
well thought-out inten ons for the rest of her senior year? She knew
finding a willing partner wouldn't be all that difficult, but she didn't want to
sleep with just any guy. If she actually did this, it would have to stay a
secret. She had to be able to trust him. And there needed to be no
emo onal strings a ached, for either of them.
The answer, of course, was obvious. Convincing herself that this was a
good idea was the far harder part.

With trembling hands she reached for her phone on the nightstand.
Damon's I'm home safe text from a couple hours ago was the most recent
message. Her fingers shook as she typed a reply.

Is it ok if I come over Sunday a ernoon?

Elena had deliberately le herself a few day's window to change her mind
between now and then, but at the moment, in the dead of night, all alone
and cold and lonely, it seemed like it could work.

To her surprise, her phone beeped less than a minute later. She smiled as
she read it. Someone else obviously wasn't sleeping either.

See you then. D.

A/N Happy Mother's Day to those of you with kiddos! Thank you to
everyone who has taken the me to leave me reviews - you guys are the
best and I adore you all. :) The ball, which started to roll with the kiss last
chapter, is picking up a bit more speed. Hope you enjoy the ride! Please let
me know your thoughts by leaving me a review in the li le box below.
Thank you & have a wonderful rest of your day! J.
10. Chapter 10
Chapter 10

When Damon walked into the study on Saturday morning with a steaming
mug of coffee in one hand and his most recent novel in the other, he was
pleasantly surprised to find a le er addressed to JAI wai ng for him on the
arm of the wingchair he'd claimed as his own.

He tore off the end of the envelope with his teeth and pulled out the page,
scanning it over quickly. His first reac on was annoyance. Pity and pat
advice – two things he neither wanted nor needed. Then he read it a
second me. And sighed.

Everyone expected him to just get over it. His father, his brother, his uncle,
Miss Lonely Love – everyone. But none of them really understood. None of
them had ever gone through something like he had. They all thought they
knew what was best for him. It drove him fucking crazy.

He put the le er in his pocket and poured himself a drink. As he was

se ling into the so brown leather, the boarding house phone began to
ring. Damon tried to ignore it, expec ng Zach to pick up in one of the other
rooms. It kept ringing. His uncle must be out. The answering machine
would come on any second, though. A er four more rings, he blew out an
irritated huff, put his glass down and got up, stalking to the table in the
corner and grabbing the receiver.

"Hello?"

The line was quiet, but he was pre y sure he could detect the sound of
someone breathing.

"Hello? Anyone there? If this is some kid trying to get his kicks, I assure you
I'm not even slightly amused."
Just as he was about to tell them to fuck off and hang up, he heard a so
female voice.

"Damon?"

He groaned. He should've known be er than to pick up the damn phone.

"The fuck do you want?"

"You're avoiding your brother."

"No shit," he snorted. What did these people really expect from him?

She sighed, loud and full of her typical Katherine put-uponness. It was one
of her trademarks, although she'd rarely used it on him. "He feels awful,
Damon. He's depressed. He needs you to forgive him."

"Uh huh. I got that much from our last conversa on."

"So can you?"

"What? Forgive him?" He paused, taking a deep breath. "No."

"Why not? You know damn well how sorry he is. Time to stop being such a
self-righteous asshole and get over it."

Jesus, now he really was annoyed. With a bi er laugh he said, "Yeah. I'm
the asshole here. Typical."

"He can't stand you ha ng him. It's ea ng him alive."

"So that's why you called me? Not to say you're sorry or to ask me to
forgive you, but to try to convince me to ease Stefan's guilt? Figures. I'm
hanging up now, Katherine."

"Wait," she blurted. "Yes, that's why I called. I know you, and I know you
s ll care about him. You can't punish him forever. He never meant to hurt
you; neither of us did. It wasn't plo ed behind your back – it just…
happened."
"There's a faster chance of me forgiving you. You were just my girlfriend.
He's my brother. Family. Family doesn't do shit like that to each other."

He heard another so sigh. "Maybe not in your limited li le world, Damon,

but in the real world, yes, stuff like this happens. It sucks, but it does. I
would love for you to forgive me someday, but Stefan is my priority right
now. Will you please just talk to him?"

Gri ng his teeth, he replied, "I have talked to him. I don't have anything
more to say. Have a good rest of your life, Katherine. I hope you two live
happily ever a er – you two deserve each other."

Before she could protest further, he clicked the End Call bu on.

This me he didn't throw the receiver across the room. He placed it back
into its cradle and returned to his chair. Swigging down the rest of the
bourbon, he took the dirty glass downstairs to the kitchen and, with more
calm than he would have expected, headed down the hallway to the gym.

Channeling his anger into an intense workout was the best way to deal
with it these days. And he didn't want to be in too horrible a mood this
weekend. Elena was coming over to study tomorrow, a er all.

The sermon seemed to drone on forever. Elena shi ed her weight,

rearranging herself on the hard wooden pew between her father and
brother. She had done her best to concentrate on Pastor Marshall's words
at first, but at this point she'd just given up trying. Instead she allowed her
mind to wander to what she should wear, what she should say, and most of
all what might end up happening when she went to the boarding house.
Probably not very appropriate thoughts for church, but it was hard to focus
on much else right now.

Elena had been waffling over whether telling Damon her idea was really
the smartest choice in the world. She'd changed her mind at least ten
mes since she'd come up with it. But this morning she'd woken up
refreshed and excited at the thought of spending me with him today. And
whatever happened between them later, well, only me would tell.
Blasphemous or not, she prayed this a ernoon would go the way she
wanted it to.

When church was over at last, she rushed to the car, smiling politely at her
fellow parishioners but not stopping to make small talk with anyone today.

Her dad gave her a knowing look as he slid into the driver's seat beside her.
"In a rush to get somewhere, swee e?" he asked.

"No." She paused. "Well, sort of. I told Damon I'd come over about one. To
study there."

Grayson raised an eyebrow her way as he followed the line of cars out of
the parking lot.

"He's helping me with my poetry assignment," Elena added. Not that he'd
asked for an explana on, but for some reason she felt compelled to
provide one anyway.

"You don't need to make excuses to visit him," he said quietly.

"I'm not!" she protested.

"Then why are your cheeks so pink?" He shot his daughter a grin. Elena
chose not to respond, but she heard Jeremy chuckling from the backseat.
He'd obviously overheard their exchange even with his ear-buds in.

Once they got home, she went straight to her room to change out of her
church clothes. Off went the skirt and ghts and blouse. On went…what?
What does one even wear to a poten al seduc on? Elena laughed out loud
to herself at her mental choice of words. Seduc on. Was that what she
intended to do to him? It was kind of hilarious, since she had pre y much
zero experience with the fine art of seducing someone. Chances were high
he'd end up just laughing in her face. Oh, she knew this could go wrong in
so many ways. But…it could also go really, really right.
She was clearly not a seductress, and there was no point in pretending to
be someone she wasn't. Elena pulled on her usual ou it of jeans and a
long sleeved tee, with a grey cardigan over it for warmth. She smoothed
down her hair, put on a touch of mascara and lip gloss, then, heart already
racing, grabbed her knapsack and headed for the door.

When she arrived at the boarding house, she sat in her dad's car for a few
moments, looking at her reflec on in the mirror behind the visor and
begging her heart to come down out of her throat and resume its usual
place, and pace, in her ribcage.

Finally she took a deep breath, shouldered her bag and went to the door.

Elena banged the heavy knocker three mes. The deep clanging sound
against the metal seemed to reverberate inside her all the way from her
finger ps to the pit of her stomach.

Damon pulled the door open and smiled, and she smiled back, and her
heart rate calmed a bit.

"Follow me back to the kitchen. Ke le's already boiling."

"Actually…" She paused as she stepped out of her boots. "I think I'd like
something…different today." Some liquid courage seemed like an excellent
idea. Elena wasn't sure she'd get through asking him what she wanted to
ask without it.

One thick brow arched. "Different how?"

"Um. Harder?"

"Harder?" he laughed. "What did you have in mind, Miss Gilbert? Liquor?"

She blushed. Then nodded.

"Really? I have a bo le of whiskey in my bedroom. Or are you more of a
vodka and juice kind of girl?" He started walking toward the steps.

She bit her lip, following him. "Uh, whiskey's fine, I think."

Damon glanced back at her with a surprised expression. When they got to
his room, Elena went in and dropped her knapsack beside the chair, falling
into the same si ng posi on on the rug in front of the fire as she had the
previous Sunday.

She heard the clink of glass and looked up to see him turning two tumblers
upright on top of his dresser. He li ed a crystal decanter and poured a
small amount of amber liquid into one. Handing it to her, he said, "Try this.
See if it meets your needs."

Elena raised the glass and put her nose into it, breathing in the intense
scent of the alcohol swirling around in the bo om. All the hairs on the
inside of her nostrils curled and she quickly turned her face away. She
knew Damon was watching her reac on, so she braced herself and took a
not-small sip.

The result was instantaneous. Her eyes widened and teared up. Her throat
tried to gag, but she managed to suppress it with a cough as the whiskey
burned a fiery trail all the way to the pit of her stomach.

"Well?" he asked with a smirk. Grimacing, she blinked, trying to find her
voice. She didn't want Damon to realize she'd never drunk hard liquor
before.

"It's…fine." Elena began to raise the glass to her lips again, intending to
down the rest in one gulp. Before she could, Damon stepped forward and
intercepted it.

"Let me get some ice for that for you. It'll take the edge off a bit."

She smiled up at him with gra tude. "Thanks."

He went downstairs to the kitchen, leaving Elena alone for a few minutes.
She ran her tongue around the inside of her mouth, trying to rid it of the
bi er taste of the whiskey. Then she reached into her bag and pulled out
her English folder containing the poems she'd wri en so far. Two more to
go and then the assignment would be finished. She'd chosen the theme of
heat; it seemed fi ng during the frigid heart of winter. Maybe this
a ernoon she'd be inspired by a whole new way to keep warm on a cold
day?

Oh my God. She had clearly lost her mind. She dropped her burning face to
the tops of her knees and laughed so ly. One swig of whiskey and her
brain was already in the gu er. Damon was going to wonder who the hell
this girl was in front of him when she told him her idea. She imagined the
expression on his face when he heard it. Those incredible blue eyes would
widen in shock. His full lips would curve into a grin as he wondered if she'd
gone off her rocker. God, those lips…she remembered the feel of them very
well. So so , yet firm at the same me. Would she get to kiss him again?
Could it happen today? Might they even make a mess of that oh-so-neatly
made bed over there?

Elena giggled again, at first scolding herself for such lusty thoughts. Then
she told herself there was nothing wrong with them. Lust was fine. He was
gorgeous and she was a warm-blooded heterosexual teenage girl. Lust was
normal in this situa on, expected even. As long as they trusted each other,
a li le bit of lust could go a long way toward solving her problem.

As long as their a achment to one another went no further than good

friends who respected each other, everything should work out just perfect.

She opened her notebook and looked over some of her has ly scrawled
ideas for the next two poems. As she was jo ng down the line 'flames
dancing over my sweat-dappled skin', Damon came back into the room,
two fat ice cubes clinking in her glass. He poured a li le more whiskey over
them and she heard them crack, the ice reac ng to the warm liquid it now
floated in.
He handed her the tumbler. "See if that's any be er," he instructed before
filling his own glass about a third of the way. Without ice.

Elena took a tenta ve taste. The frozen cubes did just what he'd said they
would, took the edge off. She had a larger sip, swirling it around inside her
mouth before swallowing. Interes ng. There was a bit of a caramel-y
a ertaste. It was s ll strong, s ll burned her throat, but…it wasn't so bad.
He'd only given her a li le, and she upended the glass, le ng the last of it
fall over the ice on its way into her mouth. She was star ng to warm up
now; the heat radia ng outward from a place deep in her lower gut. Most
of that was due to the whiskey she knew, but some of it, a li le part of it,
was caused by Damon's proximity. The memories of kissing him refused to
leave her head. Right now all she wanted was to make that happen again.

She handed the empty glass back to him with a small smile.

Damon's eyebrow quirked up again, and he chucked so ly. He stood and

returned to the dresser. "I thought you wanted to come over here to study,
not get loaded. Not that I'm complaining. I'm just surprised, is all."

"I do want to study. This a ernoon what I want is to learn. But learning
comes in many forms, and not all of them involved reading or wri ng."

Damon gave her a strange look as he set her refilled glass on the side table
behind her. "Yes, that's very true. What sort of learning did you have in
mind then? I thought you wanted me to look over your poems for you?"

"Oh, I do," Elena replied has ly, se ng the folder of completed ones on
the carpet beside him as he sat down a few feet away. She took another sip
of the liquor. It seemed to taste be er with every swallow. Either that or
she was becoming immune to the burn.

He opened the file and began to look over the first poem. Elena's nerves
shot up higher, but for a different reason this me. She hoped he liked
what he read. The thought of Damon of all people judging her wri ng and
finding her lacking worried her for reasons she couldn't quite comprehend.
To distract herself from trying to decipher his thoughts, she picked up her
notebook again. Already her brain felt a li le fuzzy from the alcohol. Not a
lot - just that queer sense of lightness, that difficulty in focusing on things
that seemed important before, but no longer do.

From the corner of her eye, she saw him raise his glass to his lips and sip as
his eyes flicked over the paper. When he came to the end, without a word
he flipped the page and began to read the next one. By this point Elena
had stopped even trying to pretend she was wri ng. A minute later he
li ed his eyes to her and smirked. "What?"

"What what?"

"Why are you staring at me?"

She flushed, dropping her eyes to the words before her again. They
seemed to flicker in and out of focus, but she wasn't trying very hard to
clear them. "I'm not staring," she mu ered.

"Yes, you were." He chuckled, pushing the bridge of his glasses higher on
his nose before resuming reading.

A few more minutes passed in silence. The room felt too quiet, with only
the crackle of the flames in the fireplace to interrupt it. Elena jo ed down
words like "smolder" and "melt" and "steam", but didn't put any of them
together into phrases. At last she heard him clear his throat, and when she
glanced up, he was looking at her again.

"Why are you staring at me?" she teased, reaching for her tumbler and
taking another drink.

"These are really good, Elena. Your themes of heat and change come
across clearly in each poem. I love the one about gradually mel ng ice the
best. The one about the campfire could use a li le more fleshing out, but
it's s ll excellent. You write very maturely for someone your age." He
looked impressed, and she couldn't help feeling proud.
"Th-thank you," she stammered. "I'll re-look at 'Flames to Ashes' a er I
finish these last two."

For a few minutes they sat in companionable silence while she tried to
write a few lines of a new poem. Nothing really good was coming to her
though; her mind was stuck on just one thing. She was grateful for the
interrup on when he said, "You never answered my ques on from before."

"Which one?"

"About what kind of non-reading and wri ng learning you want to do

today."

Elena li ed her eyes to his. Her hand groped for the glass on the floor by
her knee and she li ed to her lips again without looking. "Well…I actually
have a bit of a…proposi on…for you." She could feel heat flooding not only
her cheeks, but her en re upper body.

Damon smiled. "A proposi on? Consider me intrigued."

She swallowed nervously. "Do you recall our word games while we were
stuck last Saturday night?"

"Sure. What about them?"

Her gaze darted around the room, from the fire, to the Rembrandt print on
the wall above his dresser, to the notebook res ng on her thighs. Any spot
but his face. "Um. So…remember how I said I'd never done much…stuff?"

He was quiet for a few seconds. "By 'stuff' you mean, like, sexually?"

Elena's eyes flashed to his for a second. She nodded, then looked down
again.

"Okay," he said. "Yeah, I remember."

Taking another sip of whiskey, she asked, "Do you trust me?"
To her relief, he didn't even hesitate. "Yes."

"Good. Because I trust you, too."

"I'm glad." He paused and shi ed closer to her. "So what's up?"

God, how to even say this? With a deep breath, she started in. "Okay, so,
I'm not a virgin, like I told you. But not by much." She heard him chuckle
so ly at that, but she didn't look up. "I've had sex once, with my ex-
boyfriend, a few months a er my mom passed away. It was…it was…less
than amazing. I mean, it was probably fine for him I think. But for me,
well…" She sighed. "I just don't get why everyone else gets so worked up
about it. It wasn't horrible or anything – he's a nice guy, don't get me
wrong – but…"

"But?" Damon asked so ly. When she didn't reply, he said, "But you didn't
get much out of it? No fireworks?"

Elena blew out a small laugh, raising her eyes to him at last. "Nope. Not
one."

"I'm sorry to hear that. The first me's never that great for anyone though.
It gets be er. Much, much be er."

"So I've heard." She picked up her tumbler and downed the last swallow.
Her fingers were cold against the glass as she set it on the table behind her.

Damon blew out a so breath. "Why are you telling me this, Elena?"

The liquor was star ng to compound in her system, star ng to work its
magic. She wasn't drunk, but her inhibi ons were dropping by the second.

Looking right into his beau ful baby blues, she flashed a nervous smile. "I
think you know why."

Damon's eyes flared as it finally sunk in. His mouth and brows became
parallel lines. "I thought we discussed all this last weekend. Just friends,
right? We both agreed. Have you changed your mind? Because-"

Feeling braver, she reached over and shushed him with the pad of her
index finger against those full lips. Lips she hoped she'd get to kiss soon, if
luck was on her side. "No. I haven't changed my mind. We're friends and I
value that. But I thought maybe, as my friend, you could…you know…show
me what I'm missing? Teach me. I wanna know what the big deal is." She
smiled again. "No strings a ached - I promise."

He pulled her hand away from his mouth, but instead of releasing it, he
kept hold of it over his thigh. In a shocked, yet bemused voice, he asked,
"Are you seriously sugges ng friends with benefits?

Elena nodded, her fingers trembling in his.

For a long, long minute Damon just looked at her. She could prac cally see
the wheels turning behind his eyes as he thought over her request,
examining it from every different angle, looking for poten al potholes.

Finally with a ght smile and a so sigh he said, "There would need to be
ground rules."

Her heart leapt in her chest, at first feeling like it had stopped, before it
resumed pounding all the faster. Was he really going to say yes?
"Definitely," she replied. "First and foremost: no emo onal a achment
stronger than friendship. If either of us think we might be developing
serious feelings, we have to tell the other, and revert to just regular friends.
I mean, minus the, uh, benefits."

Damon nodded. "Agreed. No falling in love. Got it." He dragged the fingers
of his free hand through his hair, making it even more unruly. "Rule two:
either one can put a stop to this for any reason, no ques ons asked, with
no hard feelings. We just have to say the word." He paused, seeming to
consider something else. "Honesty is key," he added firmly

"Agreed." A flash of guilt stabbed through Elena as she consented to that.

He didn't know about her alter ego, and right now she had no inten on of
telling him. It wasn't that she didn't trust his ability to keep her secret; she
knew he would. She just wanted as few people in the know as possible. At
the moment there were three: herself, her editor and Bonnie. That was
enough. Much as she was proud of the advice she gave, if word got around
Mys c Falls that Miss Lonely Love was actually a high school senior, the
column would be finished. No one would trust her. No one would ever
write in again.

"Anything else?" he asked, studying her closely.

Elena thought about it for a moment, then shook her head.

"So to sum up: rule one – no messy feelings. Rule two: either of us can
walk away at any me. Rule three: we have to be honest with each other.
Did I leave anything out?"

She shook her head again. Her palms were clammy and she hoped he
couldn't feel it. His thumb absentmindedly stroked her knuckles as he
spoke.

"Okay. So we have a FWB agreement." He exhaled a laugh, looking a bit

dazed. "Wow. Never would have guessed this is what we'd be discussing
today. You surprised the shit ou a me, Elena."

Giggling, she replied, "Me, too! I can't believe I even suggested it. I blame
the booze."

"Speaking of, do you want a refill?"

She dropped her eyes to the notebook on her lap again. "No, I'm good." No
more whiskey. She wanted to remember this a ernoon.

They were both quiet for a bit, Elena pretending to read over her poetry
notes, Damon lost somewhere deep in his thoughts. He s ll held her hand.

When she looked up at him, he was staring at her again. He rubbed lazy
circles on the back of her hand. "So…" he began.
The corner of her lip quirked. "So?"

"What exactly do you want me to show you?"

More blood rushed to her face. "Um. I don't know. Everything?"

"Everything?" He chuckled. "That might take a while. Did you, uh…do you
want your first lesson…today?"

Elena bit her lower lip. Shyly she nodded. "Is that okay? Or do you want
some me to think things over more?"

He shook his head a li le, smiling. "I have a lot of alone me, and frankly I
spend far too much of it over-analyzing things. So tell me, oh pupil of mine,
just what would you like to learn?"

Swallowing was suddenly difficult. "It's up to you," she managed to

whisper." Inside she was thinking, please stop asking me ques ons and kiss
me already!

Damon smirked. It was a sexy, lazy smirk and the sight of it made her lower
belly clench. His eyes twinkled in the glow of the firelight as he downed the
last of his whiskey. In a swi movement he removed his glasses and set
them on the side table.

Then he snaked his free hand under her hair, ckling the skin on the back
of her neck as he pulled her face to his.

A/N Yeah, another cliffie. Sorry, guys! My muse has been stubborn as hell
the past few weeks, so I needed to stop here. I hope she's more agreeable
with ch 11. Please, if you can, leave me a review and tell me your thoughts.
Reviews help mo vate the muse, and my God she needs a swi kick in the
bu to get going again right now! :) Thanks to Mara for pre-reading this
one for me. Hope there's not too many typos. If you find any, please DM me
here or in Twi er so I can correct. Thanks bunches to all of you! xo
11. Chapter 11
Chapter 11

He hadn't kissed her goodbye.

It just hadn't seemed appropriate really, given the circumstances. But it

weighed on Damon's mind as he laid half covered by rumpled sheets,
sheets which s ll held her scent. He flung one arm over his eyes,
remembering the previous hour.

He hadn't kissed her goodbye. No woman had ever le his bed in the past
without at least a par ng kiss. It all felt so weird. So detached. Just…wrong.

A er, Elena had jumped up and collected her discarded clothes, scrambling
to get dressed and pack up her schoolwork. As she'd slipped through the
door, she'd mumbled something about needing to get home to make
supper. Damon had sensed a panicky weirdness, an urge to flee. He'd let
her rush out without further comment.

It wasn't a huge surprise she'd had trouble looking him in the eye as she'd
hurried off, but he hoped she'd soon get over it. This li le arrangement
she'd suggested had seemed to him like it could be asking for trouble, but
she'd assured him everything would be fine. Though he had some pre y
serious reserva ons, he'd decided to just go with the flow. He trusted her -
at least as far as he could trust anyone these days - and now he'd have to
trust that she would be able to deal with their new dynamic. And if not,
that she'd let him know she wanted to revert to the way things were
before. Sighing, he wondered, not for the first me, if it had been a mistake
to agree to cross the friendship line.

Damon thought he'd be cool with it if it turned out she was too freaked out
and didn't want to take things further. Elena had enough stress on her
without him adding to it. The last thing he wanted was for her to feel
pressured to con nue their friends with benefits arrangement just to save
herself the embarrassment of having to admit she'd reconsidered.

If she did, that would be two women who'd changed their minds about
him, not only in the recent past, but, well, ever. Damon decided he'd take it
as a sign that maybe he was just meant to be celibate. Perhaps that was his
lot in life now - deserved punishment for the sins of his younger self.

Sins like throwing his father's cash around and living large and lazy, instead
of going into pre-law like he was expected to.

Sins like all the pussy he'd go en and hearts he'd broken before mee ng
Katherine and finally thinking he'd found a woman worth commi ng to.

Sins like forge ng to pick up his mom's inhaler on the day she died.

Yeah. That was a pre y fucking big one.

The an que grandfather clock out in the hallway began to chime seven
o'clock, startling Damon out of his maudlin reverie. He exhaled another
so sigh. Then he slid over to the edge of the bed and, with reluctance,
hauled himself to his feet. Retrieving his discarded jeans from the floor, he
dragged them on over the boxer-briefs he s ll wore before looking about
for the rest of his clothing. His t-shirt and sweater were draped over the
chair by the fireplace. One sock was balled up on the ceramic hearth, a
li le too close for his comfort to the dying embers behind the grate. A
quick glance around the room failed to locate its twin.

Instead of going downstairs to see what his uncle wanted to do about

dinner, he sat back down on the edge of the bed and pulled out a side
table drawer, retrieving the latest le er from Miss Lonely Love that he'd
stuffed inside the previous day. Flopping across the ma ress, he braced
himself on his elbows and rested it, and the pad of paper he'd also
grabbed, against his pillow. He didn't know why wri ng back to the advice
columnist seemed more important than food right now, but it had been
one of those kinds of days where he just went with his impulses. And
hoped like hell they wouldn't lead him astray. Again.
Dear Miss LL,

My childhood wasn't as idyllic as you might assume.

When I was young my mother died quite suddenly. She and I had been very
close, and my life was never the same a er that. In his grief, my father
became distant, detached. He spent most of his me working, leaving our
housekeeper to take care of us. Because our dad was rarely around, my
brother and I grew to rely on each other. I'm a couple years older, so I
watched out for him, protected him as best I could and helped him when he
needed help with schoolwork or just generally fi ng in. We were ght.
Really ght. I considered him the only family I really had le . As we grew
older he became the closest friend I had, too.

In case it wasn't already obvious, I don't trust others easily. Never have. But
I trusted him. And, later, her as well. Never in a million years would I ever
have predicted that the two people in the world who I fully trusted and
loved would end up betraying me.

Everyone keeps telling me I need to get over it, that I need to forgive and
forget and move on. But they don't understand. I can't forgive. I won't
forget. They're both persona non grata to me now. I don't believe in second
chances. I learned my lesson the hard way: the only person on earth I can
rely on is myself.

So yeah, I have given your advice a lot of thought. Too much, possibly. And
it's true that there's now someone…one person…who I might actually be
willing to place a small amount of trust in. She's different from anyone else
I've ever known - more honest, more genuine, if that makes any sense. Less
complicated, I guess. I don't really know what makes her special. But if
there was anyone I might be able to really trust someday, I think it could be
her.

So rejoice, dear Miss LL, for I have actually taken your advice, at least a
li le bit. Small steps, right? Thought you'd want to know that.

Have a great week.

JAI

Elena lay on her side, eyes closed, listening to all the normal li le noises
her household made in the evening. Outside, snow pellets ra led lightly
against the windows and siding. The sound made her feel cold, and she
shivered, but she didn't get beneath the blankets. Her fingers drummed
against the top of her thigh. She was supposed to be finishing off her
poetry assignment, but she was having trouble focusing. Her thoughts
were swirling, much like the snow on the other side of the glass. And she
couldn't keep s ll. Her insides felt all ed up in knots. She was giddy; there
was no other way to describe it.

Her a ernoon with Damon had been…well…definitely a learning

experience. The hyperbole earth-sha ering came to mind. So that was
what she'd read about in trashy books, overheard girls bragging about their
boyfriend's skills at. She remembered Caroline telling anyone within
earshot in the girl's washroom one day last year how hard Tyler had
'rocked her world.' Elena hadn't even fully understood what the phrase
meant at the me.

But now, for the first me in her life, she did. Damon had rocked her world.
And she knew her li le world would never be the same again.

And if they both decided they wanted to con nue this li le…experiment,
things were sure to get even more interes ng. Because if her body had
reacted so intensely to what they'd done a few hours ago, how on earth
would she react when…if… they had actual sex? Elena couldn't even
imagine. But she was imagining anyway.

And she could not wait to see him again.

Monday morning dawned clear and, yet again, bone-chillingly cold. Elena's
fabulous mood had carried over, and apparently it showed. On the bus ride
to school, Bonnie turned to her with an arched brow. "What's with you?"
She flushed, a emp ng to suppress a ny, knowing grin. "What do you
mean?"

"You're…" Bonnie paused, examining her face more closely. "Something's

different. I've never seen that look on your face before. What's up?" She
turned and grabbed Elena by both shoulders, leaning in nearer. "Did you
see Damon this weekend? You did, didn't you?"

Elena felt her cheeks flush. She nodded.

"And? C'mon girl, tell me all the juicy deets." Bonnie's eyes sparkled with
excitement for her friend.

Elena looked down at her fingernails and pressed her lips together. The
bus's brakes squealed as it jolted to a stop to pick up more kids. With a
sigh, she mumbled, "I don't know, Bon. It's not exactly a great school bus
conversa on."

"Tell me. Right now." Bonnie dropped her voice to a whisper. A harsh
whisper, but a whisper all the same. "Did you two…did you have sex?"

Fidge ng with her knapsack, Elena refused to reply or meet her friend's
deep brown eyes.

"You didn't! Oh my God. You did!"

"Shhhhh!" Elena looked back at her with wide eyes. Her face felt like it was
on fire. "Sort of. Not exactly," she murmured, just loud enough to be heard.
"Will you shut up about it now if I promise to tell you at lunch?"

Bonnie brows narrowed. "Fine," she sighed. "I guess I can wait. Shit, you
torture me – you know that? Good thing I love you." She turned to look out
the window, pretending to ignore her friend.

Elena laughed. "I know. That's what friends are for."

About thirty seconds a er the lunch bell sounded, Bonnie grabbed Elena
from behind, took a hold of her arm and dragged her over to their side-by-
side lockers.

"Grab your coat. We're going off school property today."

"Bon, it's go a be minus ten out there! Is that really necessary? Let's just
head up to one of the turrets. I'm sure we can find a deserted place to sit
and eat."

They wound through the throngs of students making their way in the
opposite direc on down to the cafeteria on the main floor. Past the boy's
washroom, the girls slipped through the unmarked door to the side
staircase which led up to the northwest tower. The stairs were old, wooden
and narrow, forcing them to climb one in front of the other. When they
came out the door at the top, they stepped into a sunshine filled semi-
circular room with built-in benches below the tall windows. Elena was
pleased to find that, as expected, it was empty.

The glass was a bit grimy, but the bend of the river across the road was
clearly visible. It was nearly frozen over, but a smaller rivulet of fast running
dark water s ll split the ice. This sec on had been steadily shrinking, and
now it appeared to be only a few feet across. Elena wondered if the en re
river would freeze solid before this winter was over. She wouldn't be
surprised.

Bonnie took a seat and put her lunch down on the wood beside her thigh.
She didn't open it. Pa ng the spot next to her, she said, "Sit. Spill. I can't
wait much longer!"

Elena's cheeks flared hot again. She set down her paper bag but remained
standing, bracing one hand against the white-painted sill and keeping her
eyes trained on the soaring speck of a lone bird of prey hun ng in the
distance. "Well…"

She heard Bonnie exhale a frustrated puff of air. "Since this is clearly
difficult for you, Elena, I'll help you get started. Did you have sex with him,
or didn't you? What does 'sort of' mean? How do you 'sort of' have sex
with someone?"

"We…he…" Elena stopped, sighing. Her voice dropped to a whisper, though

there was no one around to overhear. "We didn't have sex-sex the way
you're thinking, but we…" She trailed off again, watching the hawk dive for
some small animal along the edge of the river. For a flee ng moment she
was distracted, hoping the creature, be it rabbit, or mouse, or whatever,
would escape becoming the hungry bird's dinner.

"You what? You're not making sense. You didn't have sex, but you sort of
did? I don't understand."

Elena's eyes shot to Bonnie's, narrowing with mild irrita on. "You're really
gonna make me say this?"

"Of course I am! Just tell me already. What? Did he go down on you? Is that
what you're too embarrassed to admit?"

Elena's gaze retuned out the window, her posture rigid, her en re upper
body now cherry red. She nodded.

Bonnie slid closer, reaching out to rest a hand on her friend's forearm.
"Was it the first me you'd ever done that?" she asked so ly.

Bi ng her lip, Elena nodded again.

She heard Bonnie suck in a breath. "Wow. So, was it good? I bet it was."

Elena was quiet for a moment. Then she mumbled, "I…um…I think I even…
you know."

The other girl laughed. "Good for you! You mean you never have before?"

With a small shake of her head, Elena thought, Could it be any ho er up

here? She tugged at the neck of her sweater, le ng some cool air flow in
against her overheated skin.
"Never? Not even with Ma ?"

"Nope. And Ma and I only…just that one me."

"Huh." Bonnie was quiet for a few moments. Then she blurted, "So with
Damon, did you, you know, reciprocate?"

Elena finally turned to meet her friend's eyes. "Did I what? Oh. Right. No. I
wanted to, but…I don't actually know how. Maybe next me he'll show me
what to do."

"Jesus, girl. You and Ma never did that either? I can't believe he never
asked you to." She chuckled. "You poor sheltered thing. I'm glad you've
finally met a guy who you can experience all the good stuff with. It'd be a
shame for you to graduate high school so damn innocent!" Bonnie laughed
again and this me Elena joined in.

"I completely agree with you!"

"So," Bonnie said with a saucy grin. "There's going to be a 'next me',
then?"

Elena shrugged. "It's not like we made firm plans, but yeah. I mean, I hope
so."

"Firm plans?" Bonnie began giggling again. "Yeah, I bet something will be
firm about them!"

Elena burst into laughter. When she calmed enough to speak, she said,
"Don't get the wrong idea, though, Bon. We're not da ng. We're s ll just
friends. Except now we're…"

Bonnie's mouth dropped open, her eyes widening. "Friends with benefits?
With him? Are you fucking kidding me? Seriously?"

Elena looked down at her lunch bag, opening it and rummaging around
inside un l she found an apple. Focusing on the waxy red and green
mo led skin, she took a bite and nodded.

"Elena Gilbert. You have amazed me twice in less than fi een minutes.
Wonders will never cease. Well, far be it from me to tell you how to live
your life-"

At that, Elena couldn't hold back a laugh, spraying out ny bits of white
apple flesh into the air. She clapped a hand over her mouth to s fle her
giggle.

"Ew. Control yourself, girl." Bonnie wrinkled her pe te li le nose in disgust.

"What was I saying before you so rudely spit food at me? Oh yeah, I won't
tell you I think that's a smart idea. If you don't wanna fall for this guy, you
need to take sex right off the table. Or the bed. Or the floor. Whatever.
Hell, you probably need to stay at least fi y miles away from him at all
mes."

Elena rolled her eyes. "It's not like that. We made an agreement. Just
friends. No strings a ached. No messy feelings. Just fun. I can do fun. I
deserve some fun, don't you think?"

"You definitely do," Bonnie nodded. "I won't argue with that. I just think
you're playing with fire. And I can't help worrying about you." She reached
for her sandwich and leaned back against the window, chewing
though ully. When she finished half of it, she turned to look at Elena
again. "You know, I s ll need to meet this guy. I want to look him over, give
him my stamp of approval for you. That's a best friend's job in situa ons
like these."

"Well come by the shop a night or two this week and do your homework
with me. Maybe he'll pop in."

Bonnie flashed Elena a wicked smile. "Sounds like a plan."

The next couple days passed without hearing from Damon, but Elena tried
not to read anything into it. A er all, it wasn't like she was messaging him
either. She figured she'd wait a li le longer and if she didn't hear from him
by end of day Wednesday, she'd text him and ask how he was. Elena's
great mood stuck with her, and Bonnie couldn't resist teasing her about
her 'new boy-toy' every chance she got.

Wednesday night at work wasn't all that busy. A few regulars sat along the
side, but otherwise Elena had plenty of me to relax. Bonnie showed up
around eight, just as the last customers were heading out. She spread her
Algebra homework across the counter-top while Elena wiped down the
tables. It was s ll too early to sweep the floor or clean out the coffee
machines, so as soon as she could, she joined her friend and opened her
assigned poetry book. This week they were reading Dylan Thomas. So far
Elena quite liked his wri ng; the man had a certain rhythmic, catchy style.

About quarter past nine, the familiar nkling of the bells over the door
interrupted their concentra on. Both girls looked up at the same me to
see who was coming in. A happy grin stretched Elena's face when she saw
the all-too familiar black pea coat and matching Greek fisherman's cap. She
got to her feet and hurried toward the door to meet him.

"Hey," Elena said, stopping just in front of him. She had to fist her hands at
her sides to stop herself from reaching out and touching him. Her cheeks
were on fire again. Same old, same old, when she was in Damon's
presence. Or talking about him. Or thinking about him. It was difficult to
meet his eyes, but she forced herself to anyway. They were shining,
matching the smile below. He was happy to see her, and she was more
than a li le relieved to see it.

"Hey," he said so ly. "Sorry I didn't…sorry I've been AWOL. How are you?"

"It's okay. C'mere, I want to introduce you to someone." Elena gave in and
put her hand on the sleeve of his jacket, urging him toward the counter
where Bonnie sat. She was staring at him with wide eyes. Outside Damon's
range of vision, Elena mouthed the words, Be cool!

Bonnie slid off her stool and took a step toward them. As she was several
inches shorter than Elena; the top of her head was about shoulder height
to Damon. "Bonnie, this is my friend, Damon." She tried to put subtle
emphasis on the word friend.

"Hey," Bonnie said with a smile. Her inquisi ve brown eyes scanned him up
and down, and, judging by the expression on her face, she liked what she
saw. What's there not to like? Elena thought.

"Damon, this is my BFF, Bonnie Benne . We've known each other since we
were toddlers."

Damon, ever the gentleman, reached out and took Bonnie's hand, giving it
a brief shake. "Pleased to meet you. Any friend of Elena's…well you know
how the rest of it goes."

"I hear you've been helping her…um…study…lately." The meaning of

Bonnie's deliberate pause was obvious. Elena's eyes flared and she shot
her a dirty look.

Damon just laughed. "Yep. English was always one of my favorite subjects.
Now if it was French or Spanish she needed help with, it would be a
completely different story!"

"Languages not your thing?"

With a smirk, he replied, "Let's just say I've never had any problem
communica ng."

Bonnie chuckled. "I bet not."

Damon turned around to catch Elena's eye and arched an inquisi ve brow
her way. She just shrugged, going around behind the counter to sit down.
He dropped onto the stool beside Bonnie and set his hat on the Formica,
running his fingers through his unruly dark hair. "What're you ladies
studying on this God-forsakenly frigid evening?" He picked up Elena's book.
"Thomas, huh? Cool. Always loved him."
"Yeah. So far I agree with you. It's the next part of our poetry component."
Elena took a sip of her hot chocolate before remembering why she was
actually there. "Oh! You want coffee?"

Damon pulled his travel mug from inside his jacket and set it down in front
of her. "Sure. I could use some warming up."

Bonnie giggled and raised amused eyes to Elena, who glared at her in
warning.

"What about you?" he asked, turning his a en on back to Bonnie. "What

are you working on tonight?"

She groaned. "Algebra."

"Fun."

"Not really. But I'm almost done." Bonnie punched some numbers into her
calculator, jo ed down the results in her notebook and closed the cover,
smiling with sa sfac on that she didn't have to look at any more math
problems tonight.

She swiveled on her stool to face a curious Damon head on. "So…Elena
tells me you moved here from Richmond recently?"

"Yep. I came up about a month ago. Staying with my uncle."

"Sorry, but I have to ask. Why the hell would anyone voluntarily move to
this crappy li le town? I mean, had you never been here before? Did your
uncle bullshit you about what Mys c Falls was like?"

Damon chuckled. "I assure you it was completely my idea."

"Huh. Did you get too loaded on New Year's Eve and fall on your head?
Suffer brain damage maybe?"

He snorted and looked over at a grinning Elena, who had been taking in
their chat with amusement. "I like her," he declared.
"Good," Elena said. "I was hoping you would."

"Hold on," Bonnie interrupted. "I'm not done grilling him yet. The big
ques on, Damon – the biggest ques on, actually – is this: just how long do
you plan to stay?"

He glanced at Elena again before flashing Bonnie a wide smile. "You're

right, that is a very good ques on. And the answer is: I don't know. Un l I
don't feel welcome anymore, I suppose. Or un l there's a really good
reason to move on. For now, I'm content to s ck around. Not the most
definite answer, I know, but it's the best one I can give you at the
moment."

Elena felt some relief flood over her at his response. For now, for the next
few months anyway, she intended to do her best to make sure he felt very
welcome, indeed. She would make it her personal mission.

"On that note, I should head home before my grandma starts to worry. It's
nearly me to make her tea." Bonnie gathered up her homework and
stuffed it all into her knapsack, then shrugged on her jacket, wrapping her
bright orange scarf around her neck. Elena came out from behind the
counter and gave her friend a hug. "See you in the morning," she called as
Bonnie walked out, the bells over the door chiming in their goodbye.

And then it was just the two of them, alone together for the first me since
she'd rushed out of his bedroom three days ago.

Elena turned her back to Damon and began to rinse out the coffee pots,
not sure what to say. The silence filled the room, thickened the air around
them. Was he wai ng for her to say something? She sighed so ly as she
dried the glass carafes and set them back under the machines so they were
ready to go for morning.

Damon cleared his throat behind her, and she straightened up to face him.
"Soooo…" he started.

She gave him a small smile. "So?"

"Can I give you a ride home tonight?"

Shrugging, she replied, "Sure."

He looked at her a moment longer, eyes narrowed. "Are we going to be

awkward with each other now?"

"Um, I hope not." She smiled again. "Cause awkward would pre y much
suck."

"Yep. Hey, I apologize again for not touching base sooner. A er the way you
le on Sunday, I thought maybe you needed a bit of me to think things
over."

She nodded in understanding. "Yeah, sorry about that. I guess I did kinda
freak out a li le bit. But if it makes you feel be er, I'm totally fine now, was
fine not long a er actually. Maybe I just needed some air or something."
She pressed her lips together and asked the ques on that was most
weighing on her mind. "What about you?"

"Cool as a…well as pre y much the en re world at the moment." He

flashed her a ght smile. "We're good then?"

"I think so, yeah." She pulled on her jacket and walked to the door with
him, the bells jingling overhead once again as she locked it behind her. His
Jeep was nearby, and since the engine hadn't had me to get fully cold, by
the me he pulled up in front of her house, the interior was nice and
toasty.

"You working un l midnight on Saturday?" Damon wondered casually as he

shi ed into Park.

Elena blew out a laugh. "Of course."

He hesitated a moment. Then he asked, "Would you want to come back to

the boarding house and hang out with me a er?"
With a surprised frown, she replied, "That late?"

"I was thinking maybe you could, you know, stay over? If you wanted to. I
don't know if your dad would go for that or not, but…"

Elena jumped in. "I could tell him I was sleeping at Bonnie's I think."

"Yeah?"

With a li le smile, she said, "Yeah."

He looked pleased. Then something in his gaze shi ed, became more
intense as he looked into her eyes. For a moment she thought maybe he
was going to kiss her. Which would be against their Friends With Benefits
rules, wouldn't it? Or would it? Friends probably wouldn't give each other
goodnight kisses. Even if she'd really like him to.

Damon reached over and squeezed her gloved hand, once, and quickly.

"Night, Elena."

She pulled on the door handle, realizing there would be lots of me for
more sweet kisses on Saturday night if she did sleep over.

"Goodnight."

A/N Yes, I know I've been gone for a while, and I apologize. A combina on
of a stubborn muse and then 2 weeks of flat on my back illness had me
away from my computer for an extended length of me. S ll not 100% but
I'm doing much be er now. Anyway, I won't bore you with details of my
life, but please try to be pa ent with me as the next couple chapters might
take a bit longer than my previous "normal" of every 1 to 2 weeks. But who
knows? Maybe I'm wrong and I'll be able to write more soon. Much love
and thanks to Mara for pre-reading and Cathy for proofing and to ALL of
you who took the me to favourite and reviews not just this story but any
of my fics. Last but not least, please, please leave a review? It would
definitely help me feel be er! Hugs & love to all of you who take the me
to review - you are the best!
12. Chapter 12
Chapter 12

Thursday night saw a near-constant flow of customers in and out of the

Clutch. Elena didn't get a chance to look at the bundle of le ers she'd
picked up at the Herald un l nearly eleven, when she was sprawled across
her own bed. Her homework load had been par cularly heavy lately;
normally she had her column complete and e-mailed to her editor by end-
of-day Wednesday. She was a day behind, and it needed to get done before
she went to sleep.

The stack was only four le ers thick this week, which was a blessing, really.
She began reading through them, and jo ng down notes about the kinds
of answers she wanted to give. When she got to the bo om one, she
smiled as she recognized JAI's scratchy prin ng on the envelope. His
message caused several different emo ons to pass over her: sadness and
empathy over losing his mom at a young age, annoyance over how his
father treated his sons a er, frustra on over how JAI's rela onship with his
brother turned out, and then, surprisingly, relief to see that maybe he'd at
last found someone he was considering forging a new friendship with.
Elena hoped this girl was pa ent and gentle with him, because he was
going to need a lot of understanding from anyone new in his life.

She thought about replying right away, even flipped her pad to a new sheet
and wrote Dear JAI on the top line. But the truth was that she didn't really
know just what she wanted to say to him yet, and finishing her column
within the next hour was a much more pressing deadline. So she folded his
le er and tucked it inside the book with the others. Then she dove into
wri ng replies to the publishable le ers, like the responsible girl she
always tried to be.

"I've never lied to my dad before, Bonnie." Elena said, frowning. Her brows
were furrowed as she looked at her friend. "What if he sees right through
me?" The bus jolted in and out of a dip in the road. This sunny Friday had
brought with it a surprise end-of-February thaw, and the mel ng ice on the
roads made for a bumpy ride.

Bonnie pa ed Elena's knee. "Leave it to me. I've got this covered. Just tell
him you're helping me with my English essay that's due Monday, and that
you'll be home in me to go to church. Grayson'll be cool with it, I'm sure."

"I don't know," Elena sighed. "I really want to go to Damon's tomorrow
night but…I hate having to lie. It just feels wrong."

"Lying to your parents in order to go make out with a cute guy is just part
of being a teenage girl, Elena. Look at it this way—it's a life experience.
And you want more life experience, don't you?"

Elena s ll looked doub ul, but she gave a reluctant nod. "Yeah. That's
true."

"Am I seriously going to have to talk you into sleeping over at your smokin'
hot not-boyfriend's place?" Bonnie dropped her already low voice to barely
a whisper. "I think you should go fuck his brains out. And then tell me all
about it the next day so I can live vicariously through you for once!"

They both erupted into giggles. The two girls si ng in the seat in front of
them swiveled their matching blonde heads and shot curious looks their
way, making Elena clap a hand over her mouth to s fle her laughter.

"I know you're right. And I want to, I really do!" she murmured once she'd
calmed, leaning closer to Bonnie's ear.

"Then it's se led. Tell you dad tonight, and pack a bag before you leave for
work tomorrow a ernoon. I'm calling you at noon on Sunday though, got
it?"

Blowing out a nervous puff of air, Elena agreed.

Saturday, the last day in February, was also unseasonably warm. The drip
of mel ng icicles from every roo op in town made background percussion
to the slosh-slosh through puddles on the sidewalks on Elena's walk to
work, her heavier than usual knapsack slung over one shoulder.

It felt great to not have to wear gloves and a woolen hat this a ernoon;
she reveled in the feeling of the sun's warmth on the back of her head. She
knew that this was just Spring's li le tease, that Winter was s ll far from
finished with Mys c Falls, but on days like this she allowed herself to be
op mis c about the turning of the seasons anyway.

Why not, right? Elena had every reason to be in a fabulous mood today.
Not only was the warmer weather enough to cheer anyone up, but later
tonight she had a date with a very hot guy. Even if it wasn't really a date,
she couldn't help but s ll sort of think of it that way.

At the Clutch, she reminded her dad that she wouldn't be home un l
morning as he topped up the mugs of some customers si ng at the
counter. When she finally succeeded in shooing him out the door, the place
was nearly packed. The next four hours seemed to zip by as she made
sandwiches, plated pastries and brought coffee to the much more cheerful
clientele. This warm spell had brought more people out and about, and,
though serving them kept her hopping, Elena was more than grateful for it.

She didn't even no ce Damon slip in and take a seat at a small table in the
very back un l he'd been there for several long minutes already, his travel
mug open on the Formica in front of him.

"Sorry," she told him with a harried but genuine smile as she filled it from
the full coffeepot in her hand. "As you can see, it's a total zoo in here
tonight."

"No problem. Maybe I can help out?" He pushed his glasses higher on his
nose as he returned her smile.

Elena's eyes widened. "Really?"

"Sure." Ge ng to his feet, he took the carafe from her. "Let me top up the
people who need topping up while you take care of the ones wai ng at the
counter to pay."

"Sure you don't mind?"

"I've got it. Go." He waved her toward the cash register with his free hand.
As she hurried away, she heard him say to Mrs. Huxley, "Can I warm you
up?" Elena couldn't suppress an amused grin at the older women's
surprised, "Oh! Yes, please!" response.

For the next two hours Damon took care of all the coffee orders and refills
while she managed the food and ll. She was impressed with his ability to
service customers quickly, yet s ll find a few moments to chat with each
and every one. Frankly, he was a natural. They all seemed to love him. Even
the usual curmudgeons somehow managed to rouse a smile for Damon
when he turned on his a en on to them. If only her dad could see this!

It was a er eleven before they found me to actually sit down and take a
break. Elena's feet were aching, and she felt exhausted. Although she was
s ll excited about going home with him later, when she thought about that
big, comfortable bed in his room, she imagined crawling into it and
snuggling up to him, falling asleep in his arms. She was pre y sure that
wasn't all he had in mind, though. But then again, no details had been
discussed. Since they were just friends, maybe sleeping over really did
mean only sleeping? Oh, who was she kidding? The two of them alone in
bed together for an en re night and morning, with the kind of chemistry
both were now fully aware they shared? No way would they be able to
keep their hands to themselves the en re me. But she had no idea
whatsoever what to expect.

Elena's heart rate sped up just thinking about it, and her imaginings of
what might come later already had her feeling much more awake.

"You want more coffee?" she asked Damon, star ng to rise.

"Nah, I'm good. I'm s ll buzzing from running around so much tonight.
Never seen it so busy in here!"

"Thaw," she replied with a shrug. "It always lures the residents of Mys c
Falls out of their homes and puts them in the mood to socialize again."

"Makes sense I guess," Damon said. "So, forty minutes ' l close. What do
we s ll need to do? Sweep the floors, start the dishwasher, clean the
coffee makers…anything else?"

"Set everything up ready to go for Monday morning. Balance the cash

register." She looked around them, lips pressed together in thought. "I
guess that's about it."

He shot her a smile. "Cool. I'll do the sweeping and washing up; you do the
register and prep for re-opening. Deal?"

"Oh no, you've already done more than enough to help me tonight! Just sit
and relax." Elena slid off her stool and turned to finish loading the
dishwasher.

She heard Damon snort, and li ing her head saw him coming around
behind the counter. He edged her away from the dishwasher with the side
of his hip and, kneeling, pulled it open and began to fill it with dirty mugs.
Elena looked at him in surprise for a moment, then smiled to herself and
sat back down, grabbing the stack of receipts to begin calcula ng the day's
totals.

Together they finished up all the li le jobs needed doing to close up by

about quarter to midnight. Elena felt red physically, but her mind was
hyper alert, wondering what the rest of the night would bring. Every me
she glanced over at Damon, she felt heat rush to her cheeks. Even
sweeping floors the man looked good enough to lick. Pushing some loose
strands of hair off her face, she frowned. She was sure a er all her rushing
around tonight she must look a mess. It wasn't fair in the slightest.
A few minutes later Damon came back behind the counter and tucked the
broom into its li le closet. "Nearly done?" he asked.

Elena turned to look up at him from her stool behind the cash register and
smiled. "Yep. It was a pre y good night. Made enough to make up for the
slow beginning of the week. Dad will be happy."

"Excellent. So, what do you want to do for the last ten minutes? Another
quick round of Truth or Dare?" He smirked and dropped her a wink.

She got up and walked to the front door, taking a look out into the street.
About a block and a half down, she saw a small group of people smoking
and cha ng on the sidewalk in front of the Grill, but no one was anywhere
near the Clutch. Her brows knit together as she debated. With a flick of her
wrist she flipped the Open sign to Closed and turned the lock on the door.
Heading back over to where Damon stood, she smiled. "I think it'd be okay
if we closed up a few minutes early tonight."

"You sure?"

Elena nodded, opening the broom closet door to pull out her coat and
boots. A minute later she was locking up the shop from the outside, and
then following Damon across the road to his Jeep. The pavement was
slushy and wet, and she had to step over puddles to not get her boots
soaked.

Neither of them said much on the drive to the boarding house. When
another melodic male singer with accompanying guitar came on the radio,
Damon turned up the volume and began to hum so ly. Elena barely
no ced, her thoughts tumbling over one another as her mind played out
scenario upon heat-inducing scenario of what she might have to look
forward to once they arrived.

The res crunched over the gravel driveway as they pulled up in front of
the garage. Elena reached behind her seat to retrieve her knapsack, but
before she could touch the door handle to exit, Damon was right there
pulling it open for her. He offered her his hand to help her out and she
stared at it for a moment in surprise. Almost shyly, she slipped her fingers
into his. Mild disappoint surged through her when he let go the moment
she had both feet firmly on the ground. She heard the so clunk of the
Jeep door being closed, and then felt his hand again on the small of her
back, guiding her toward the front entrance. A shiver unrelated to the
winter night passed through her.

The air inside the boarding house was chilly, but by now Elena was
expec ng it. She toed off her boots, leaving her coat on as they made their
way upstairs as quietly as possible to Damon's bedroom. The idea of Zach
discovering she was here—not just here, but actually spending the night
with his nephew—mor fied her, although she had no inten on of
admi ng that to Damon.

As soon as they stepped into his room, he went and knelt on the hearth,
pushing the grate aside to poke at the remains of the embers in the
fireplace. He carefully posi oned a few new chunks of wood. "This room
warms up pre y quickly," he assured her.

Elena looked at the neatly made bed, two furrows marring her forehead as
she contemplated it. She'd been run off her feet for hours tonight at work,
and she probably smelled like stale coffee and sour sweat. Trailing her eyes
around the room, she no ced the door to Damon's bathroom standing
par ally open. It gave her inspira on.

Crumpling some newspaper and tucking the pieces under the edges of the
logs, he stood to reach for a matchbox on the mantle. As he pulled out a
long match, she said to his back, "Hey, uh...so, it's been kind of a long day.
Would you mind if I used your shower before, um, sleep?"

Damon's a en on was focused on ge ng the flames going, and he waved

a hand behind him in the general direc on of the bathroom. "Help
yourself. Towels are on the shelf on the right."

She shrugged off her coat and laid it over the arm of the chair before going
into the bathroom with her knapsack. Inside the bag, below her
homework, she'd stuffed in an old t-shirt, leggings, underwear, toothbrush
and a clean sweater.

A er closing the door, Elena turned on the shower to let the water heat
up. Then she stripped off her grungy clothing, cramming it into the bo om
of her bag and pu ng the t-shirt and leggings she intended to wear as
pajamas on the counter. She examined her reflec on in the large mirror as
she wrapped an elas c around her ponytail, securing her hair high on the
back of her head in a messy bun. Her face didn't so much look red right
now as anxious. By the me she pulled open the glass door, steam was
already rising. Apparently water in the boarding house warmed up fast—
one thing in the old building that s ll worked efficiently at least.

She braced her palms against the ceramic les of the shower's back wall
and let the water beat down on her red muscles. Squeezing her eyes shut,
she heard nothing but the wet thrumming against her skin. In the darkness
behind her eyelids she felt safe inside her own protec ve li le mental
bubble. Elena let her frazzled mind relax along with her body.

At last she opened her eyes a frac on of an inch and fumbled for the soap
in the stainless steel dish bolted to the wall. She s ll felt pre y nervous
about going to bed with Damon. Oh my God. Going to fricking bed with
Damon! What am I—what are we—doing? she thought. She took her me
soaping and rinsing, going over every inch of skin mul ple mes. Finally,
when she could delay no longer, she shut off the water and stepped out
into the steamy room, wrapping herself in a so white bath sheet.

Feeling sort of guilty about how long she had taken, she pulled on her shirt
and leggings, and tugged her hair loose. A er brushing her teeth, she took
a deep breath, grabbed her knapsack and re-entered the bedroom.

Damon sat in the wing chair by the now-crackling fire, clearly wai ng for
her. He smiled when he saw her, and rose to his feet. "Feel be er?"

Elena nodded. "Much. Thanks."

"You need anything? Something to drink?"

She shook her head.

"Okay. My turn now. Just make yourself at home." He set his glasses on the
bedside table closest to the door before disappearing into the bathroom. A
minute later she heard the shower come back on. With a worried frown
she hoped she'd le enough hot water for him.

Elena looked at the bed, then to the vacated chair by the fire, then back to
the bed again, not sure where she should wait for him to return. Finally she
went around and sat on the edge of the ma ress on the side furthest from
the door. She leaned her knapsack against the nightstand and pulled back
the blankets, sliding underneath and propping herself up on the pillows.
She could hear the shower drumming behind the closed bathroom door,
and couldn't help picturing Damon standing naked below it, soaping
himself down. A li le smile rose unbidden to her lips at that mental image.
While she hadn't seen him fully bare last Sunday, what she had seen had
been…impressive. He was lean and toned, every muscle in his torso and
abdomen taut and defined. She remembered the so feel of his skin, and
how he'd shuddered a li le when she'd run her finger ps across his bare
stomach. That slight quiver had given her a thrill, a small feeling of power.
She wanted to feel like that again. That, and more. So much more.

The water shut off. Quickly she leaned over to turn on the bedside lamp
and pull her Dylan Thomas book from her bag so she looked like she'd
been reading. A minute later, Damon emerged, toweling off his dark hair as
he walked over to the fire. He wore nothing but black pajama bo oms. His
smooth chest gleamed in the firelight as he bent to give the logs another
jab with the poker. Sparks shot up into the flue. A few more bloomed in
Elena's lower belly that had nothing whatsoever to do with the flames.

Damon straightened up and turned toward her, the glow from the fire
crea ng a halo around him which highlighted his messy damp hair. She
couldn't see his eyes clearly, but she knew they were trained on her.
"Comfy?" he asked, one side of his mouth curling up into a half-grin.
Elena smiled back, her heartbeat picking up speed as he came over to his
side of the bed and pushed the covers aside. His side? Her side? Will we
have our own sides now? Is this really happening?

"Sure," she answered as calmly as she could. She looked back down at the
poem in front of her. The words on the page were blurring in and out of
focus. Concentra on was impossible. Closing the book, she set it on the
nightstand, sighing under her breath as she turned her body toward him.

Damon lay on his side bracing his head on his arm, the white blankets
pulled up to his waist. She noted a twinkle in his eyes as he held her gaze.
"Sleepy?"

She half-shrugged, using her right shoulder only as she was lying on her le
one. "I'm okay."

The smirk returned. "Are you nervous, Elena?"

She exhaled a so sigh. Honesty was one of their rules, and even though
she couldn't be as honest with him as she'd like, she had promised, and
she intended to do her best to keep it—all but that one important li le
secret anyway. "A li le," she admi ed.

He fell onto his back and folded his arms behind his head, looking up at the
ceiling instead of at her. "It's okay. It's normal to be. We can just go to sleep
if you want to."

Elena frowned and was silent for a few moments. Her eyes swept over the
expanse of Damon's chest, along the lean muscles in his arms. "No, I…I
don't…no."

"You don't know?" he asked, looking over at her again.

With a small smile she clarified, "No, I, um, I don't want to sleep just yet."

They stared silently at each other, the crackling and spi ng from the logs
in the fireplace the only background music. Elena felt overheated, and she
wished she'd brought something lighter to wear. She pushed the blankets
down to her waist to allow some cool air closer to her skin.

"Too hot?" he asked with a knowing li le grin. "Thought you were freezing
before?"

She half-shrugged again, but didn't reply.

"You know, you could always remove some layers to cool down." Damon
inched over a li le closer, but made no move to touch her.

Elena didn't respond. A er a few seconds contempla on, she reached

under the blankets and pushed her leggings down and off, dropping them
onto her knapsack. Then she rolled onto her side to face him again.
"Done."

He chuckled. "Well, we're half-way there, depending, of course, on where

'there' is. I've got bo oms on and you've s ll got your shirt on. Now what?"

She sucked in a breath. Was he really asking her? She wished he'd just take
control. Right now she was more than willing to surrender it to him, to do
whatever he wanted. For a long, long moment she didn't reply. At last she
whispered, "Show me."

His eyes widened along with his smile. "Alright." He moved even closer,
un l their faces on the pillows were only inches apart. "You have to
promise to just say the word if you want me to stop, though. Deal?"

Elena gulped, her throat ght. She reached behind her and switched off
the lamp.

"Deal," she breathed.

A/N Thank you to anglcdmn1986 and LoveDE for their help. Sorry for the
delay with this chapter - my muse has been uncoopera ve lately. I'll try my
best to get ch 13 out a li le faster than this one was. With any luck ch 13
will make up for your wait. :) Please reviews? Reviews really do make my
day. Love to you all...
13. Chapter 13
Chapter 13

"Deal," Elena breathed.

Damon chuckled so ly, so close to her now she could feel it like a vibra on
over her skin. His fingers brushed the side of her face, and she held her
breath, wai ng. She wished he would just kiss her. Could she summon the
courage to kiss him first? Before she could make a move, he shi ed his face
just the smallest bit, leaning in un l his lips met hers, effec vely pu ng an
end to her mental struggle.

At first she tried to keep s ll, to let him lead her where he wanted to take
them. She felt his hand cup her cheek, drawing her closer. Both his fingers
and lips were so and gentle, like he was tes ng to make sure this was
what she really wanted.

It was.

He tasted minty from his toothpaste, with a lingering hint of coffee

underneath. Slipping an arm around his waist, Elena shi ed un l their
bodies were pressed together. She felt him smile against her mouth, and in
response, he hooked a leg over hers. Their kisses began to deepen. As she
skimmed her hands up his back, the muscles in his shoulder blades rippled
beneath her touch.

His skin was so so —she didn't realize boys could be this so . She'd always
assumed guys were rough, o en hairy creatures, but Damon wasn't like
that at all. He was nothing like Ma ; he was like no one she'd ever met
before.

He stroked her neck, ckling the sensi ve spot behind her right ear with
the pad of his thumb. She gasped so ly as she felt the evidence of his
arousal pressing against her thigh through the co on of his pajama
bo oms. As curious as she was about it, she couldn't bring herself to
actually reach down between them and… Nope. Not that brave, she
thought, a blush hea ng her cheeks. Not yet, anyway.

Damon's hand was on the move again, trailing over her backside. When it
reached the hem of her t-shirt, it slid underneath, his fingers gliding oh-so-
gently up her spine. His every touch sent shivers across her skin. She broke
away, drawing in a sharp breath.

"Okay?" he whispered, eyes catching hers in the dim light from the
fireplace.

Elena nodded, swallowing, tas ng him s ll. Wan ng more. She pressed her
lips to his again, opening her mouth wider this me, running her fingers
into his hair. Their kisses quickly intensified. His tongue stroked along hers,
while his fingers traced circles over the skin of her lower back.

He pushed her shirt higher, and she realized she wanted to feel her bare
chest pressed against his. Pulling away from him, she sat up and tugged it
over her head, tossing it to the floor beside her knapsack. The firelight
made her bare skin glow.

Suddenly shy, she began to pull the blankets up over her chest.

Damon's hand stopped her. "Don't," he whispered. "Don't cover yourself

up. You're beau ful. Don't you know that?"

Elena didn't know what to say. She had certainly never thought of herself
that way before. Did he really think she was beau ful? She hesitated, then
let the sheets fall to her waist, s ll not turning her head to look at him.

Their a ernoon together last Sunday had passed in what felt like no me at
all, and to be completely honest, she'd had her eyes closed for much of it.
So yes, he'd already seen her naked once before, but tonight it felt…
different, somehow. Like the conscious choice to spend the night together,
to share a bed for all those hours, made things between them all that
much more real. And in mate.
She was being silly, she knew. But it was difficult for her to think of herself
as a sexual person, as the sort of girl who was totally relaxed being naked
around her boyf—no. Not that. Around her…partner.

Elena felt his hand on her shoulder, and slowly turned to look at him. He
was staring at her with admira on in his eyes. And lust. That look she
recognized. She'd seen it on Ma 's face the a ernoon she'd given him her
virginity. And there was that to consider, too. The idea of having sex again
scared her, and yet at the same me it was also exci ng. Two conflic ng
emo ons that made her more nervous than she could ever remember
feeling in her en re life.

Damon pulled her into another deep kiss, his hand sliding down her
shoulder blade and coming to a rest on the side of her ribcage. His touch
was light, and it ckled, a li le. She tried to restrain her giggle, but just as it
was about to break free, the pad of his thumb slipped forward and brushed
over her nipple. Her laugh turned into a sharp gasp, and she felt him smile
as he did it again. And again.

Shi ing their bodies, he laid her down on her back, her head against the
pillow. A er a minute or two, his kisses le her lips and began to travel
across her jaw, then along the side of her throat. His mouth traced a damp
path over her chest un l he arrived at his des na on: her le breast. A low
groan escaped as his tongue flicked over her, teasing her peak un l it was
rigid. Her groan morphed into a gasp when he latched on, his other hand
coming up to tweak the neglected nipple to a en on.

Oh my God! Elena thought. She vaguely recalled him doing something sort
of similar last Sunday, but then it all got obscured by what had happened
shortly therea er. This me she vowed to commit every last second to
memory. He squeezed and licked and sucked each breast un l she thought
she'd go mad, her thighs pressing together in a failed a empt to alleviate
some of the building pressure. Who knew her breasts were so sensi ve?
Apparently there was a direct link from her nipples down to her nethers.
Why hadn't she been aware of this before? This seemed like something
important she should have known.
Elena looked along her body at him at the same me as he raised his eyes
to hers, and she thought she saw a hint of a smirk. Then he suckled her
harder, and she bucked underneath him. She wanted…no, she needed
more. So much more. But she didn't have the nerve to ask him for it. She
ran her fingers into his hair, silently urging him to con nue, hoping he'd get
the hint.

With a final lick, Damon pulled away and met her eyes again. He was
definitely smirking. No doubt about it. "I take it you like that?"

She nodded.

"What do you want me to do to you next?"

Her mouth fell open in surprise. Did he really want her to spell it out?
"Um…you know," she mumbled, flushing. She was suddenly tempted to
pull the sheets over herself again but resisted the urge.

"Tell me," he insisted.

Elena gulped. "I...um…" She closed her eyes.

"Uh uh. Open 'em. Look at me, Elena."

His head was lted, and he grinned at her. "You need to be able to tell a
guy what you like in bed. Otherwise you might not get it. Don't be shy. Just
say it."

She took a deep breath. "What you were just doing? That felt…amazing."

"Glad you enjoyed it. That's a good start. So now what? Shall we roll over
and go to sleep?" He winked.

"Uh…no."

"No? Then what?"

"I want you to…I want you to…" She stopped. Her en re body felt like it
was about to burst into flames. With a so sigh, she mumbled, "I want you
to… um…I want you to…have sex with me."

Damon smiled again. "Be more specific. Sex can mean a lot of different
things."

That wasn't good enough for him? Was he deliberately trying to torture
her? She sighed. "You know what I mean!"

"I want to hear you to say the words."

She just stared at him.

He cocked an amused eyebrow. "Is saying it really so difficult? You want me

to fuck you? Is that what you want?"

Elena didn't think she could flush any deeper. Why did he need her to spell
this out? Why did they have to talk about sex? Ma had barely talked at
all. Couldn't Damon just, you know, do it? Do her? Ugh. This was a bit of a
mood-killer.

She closed her eyes and nodded again, mor fied. A large part of her brain
had entered Flight Mode, and she debated calling the whole thing off and
just heading home.

"Say it," he instructed, his voice all husky. Her libido perked right back up
again at the sound, and she opened her eyes to look at him again.

"I just did," she mumbled.

He was silent. And she realized what he wanted her to say. Words that had
never passed the lips of Elena Gilbert before. Words she never thought
she'd ever say to anyone, ever. Because it just wasn't her, you know? She
didn't swear, she wasn't vulgar, and she certainly wasn't the type of girl to
tell a man what she wanted him to do to her.
Their stalemate dragged on for a few long moments.

Finally she gave in. She could do this. They were just words, a er all. It
wasn't really that big of a deal. Except, to her it kind of really was. Holding
his gaze in hers as confidently as she could manage, she whispered, "Fuck
me, Damon."

His baby blue eyes shot wide for a second and a hungry expression came
over his face. This clearly turned him on. A millisecond later his lips crashed
into hers again.

Their kisses were more passionate now, his mouth claiming hers, their
tongues diving, dodging, thrus ng, parrying. She felt one of his hands run
along her side un l it came to the elas c of her pan es. It didn't stop, just
pulled the fabric down her legs as it went, sliding them off her feet and
tossing them who knew where.

Now she was completely bare beside him, but he s ll wore his pajama
bo oms. That was hardly fair, was it? Elena dragged her mouth from his for
a moment. "Quid pro quo," she murmured, tugging at his drawstring.

Damon chuckled. "But of course, my fair lady. Your wish is my command."

He sat up and pushed his pants off, and she no ced he wore no underwear
beneath. The only light was the flickering glow from the fireplace, but she
could see well enough.

Elena's throat ghtened. She'd never seen a man naked and up close and
personal before. With Ma it had been a darkened room, and frankly she'd
averted her gaze. And last weekend Damon had kept his boxer-briefs on.
Her cheeks burned, and she didn't know where she should rest her eyes.
Finally she just closed them again.

Another low chuckle. Then she felt his hand close over hers and bring it to
her le , placing it palm down on him. She heard his breath catch, felt him
shudder just a li le at her touch.
"You're so shy," he said so ly. Elena could hear the smile in his voice, but
she kept her eyes shut. "Shy is fine. I have no problem with shy. But you
asked me to teach you, so I'm teaching you. Open your eyes and watch."

With a small sigh, she eased her lids part-way open, peering down
between her lashes at their joined hands. His skin down there felt like sa n
beneath her fingers. How could anything be so so yet so hard at the same
me? He helped her gently grip him. She exhaled through her nose in
fascina on as he started to move their hands up and down.

"Okay, now you take over," Damon told her, removing his guiding hand.
Immediately her fingers s lled. "It's okay, Elena. Just, you know, touch me.
Stroke the sha with a firm grip, but not too ght. Every once in a while
rub your thumb, or even your palm, over the head." He stopped with a
gasp as she did as she was told. "Oh yeah. Just like that. You've got this."

"It's so so . Like velvet," she observed quietly, awe evident in her tone. She
knew he knew she'd never done this before, and he wasn't judging, so she
just tried to relax and remember what he'd instructed. Trying to keep an
even pace, she stroked the top of him with the pad of her thumb on every
upsweep. She thought she was ge ng the hang of it. Then she glanced at
his face and realized just how right she was. His eyes were closed and his
lips were slightly parted. There was no doubt he was apprecia ng her
novice efforts.

A er a few minutes, she no ced Damon's breathing was picking up speed

and growing shallower. She wondered if he wanted her to use her mouth
on him. He hadn't men oned anything like that. Should she just try to do
it? Suddenly he reached over and grabbed her wrist, hal ng her
movements. She looked over at him ques oningly.

He gave her a weak smile. "It feels really good. Too good. Time to put a
stop to that before we hit my event horizon. Otherwise, I'm gonna need a
fi een minute intermission to recharge my ba eries."

Elena was confused. Event horizon? Recharge his ba eries? She had no
idea what he meant, but she retracted her hand fast. Though he'd clearly
been enjoying it, he wanted her to stop touching him. Then she got it, and
she closed her eyes, feeling stupid. Of course!

Pulling her face to his, Damon gave her another deep kiss. "Now…what was
it you asked me to do to you before I interrupted to give you a li le
anatomy lesson?" His voice had roughened to that sexy rumble again, and
her lower belly ghtened in response. With a smirk, he added, "Oh yeah, I
think I remember."

He dipped his mouth to kiss each of her breasts in turn, licking her nipples
un l they stood back at a en on. One hand slid down her side and over
her stomach, and Elena's flesh pebbled at his touch. As he trailed a
deliberate path through her lower curls, she recalled last Sunday, and
shi ed her thighs apart to allow him be er access. She sucked in a sharp
breath as he gently tapped her most sensi ve spot, but then he moved on.
Once he'd explored her thoroughly to make sure she was good and ready,
he inched a careful finger inside. She exhaled another gasp, spreading her
legs wider. S ll lavishing a en on to a breast, his finger curled up, hi ng
just the right place, making her writhe in her need for more.

Elena's own fingers dove into his hair, and though she didn't say a word, he
seemed to understand. He withdrew his hand and raised his face to kiss
her lips once again, rolling his body above her and bracing his hands on
each side of her head. His smooth chest rested lightly against hers, skin to
skin, and a shiver ran through her. Without thinking about it, she shi ed
her knees up and apart to cradle his hips between her thighs.

He pulled away a few inches to look her in the eyes. "You sure you're really
up for this?" he whispered. "Just say the word if you've changed-"

Elena shushed him with the pad of her index finger on his so lips. "I
haven't."

Damon smiled that sexy half-smile again and nipped playfully at her
finger p before giving her another quick kiss. "Excellent. Because I am
about to rock your world."
Reaching to his le , he pulled open a drawer on the nightstand and
retrieved a condom, tearing the end of it open with his teeth. Not sure
where to look, Elena averted her eyes while he rolled it into place. Was this
something she should be asking him to show her how to do? Another me
maybe.

Her eyes flew wide as he guided himself along her wetness. Then slowly,
ever so slowly and carefully, he began to push inside.

Oh my God!

Elena gasped even louder as he filled her. This was nothing at all like how
she remembered. It was so much more…intense.

He stopped moving and examined her face again, wai ng for her to adjust.
"You okay?" he asked. There was something about his voice—it seemed
different, somehow. She couldn't quite place it.

"Yes," she breathed. "I'm fine."

"Am I hur ng you?"

"No, I…no. It's okay." God, she sounded just exactly as naïve as she felt. She
was sure Damon was used to much more experienced women. This was
probably not par cularly fun for him. He was just doing it to help her out,
to teach her, like she'd asked him to. As sweet as he was being, she knew
she could never live to up what she assumed were his expecta ons.

He leaned back down against her and kissed her passionately. One hand
cradled the side of her face and the other ran over her hip to grip the back
of her thigh as he started to move.

Elena tried to concentrate on kissing him back. She really tried. But the
sensa on of him inside her was too much for her to ignore. Her fingers ran
over the smooth surface of his back and down to his bu . With both hands
she gripped his muscled backside as he thrust his hips forward in a gentle
pace.
Damon broke their kiss and lowered his head into the space between her
shoulder and neck. "Tilt your hips up a li le," he instructed, his lips close to
her ear. She shivered at the feeling of his breath against her skin, and tried
to obey. "Yep, just like that. Now, if you can, try to push back against me as
I push forward. See if you can match my rhythm."

"Like this?" she mumbled, li ing her pelvis up to meet his thrusts. "Is this
right?"

She felt the vibra ons of his low chuckle ckle her throat. "Yes. Don't
worry. You're fine. It's all good. More than good—amazing. As we get used
to each other, we'll figure out exactly how to get in synch and it will all feel
natural." He li ed his face to look at her again. "I promise."

Did that mean he might want to do this again? Elena couldn't believe the
pa ence he was showing her. All of a sudden, she felt very lucky.

A er a few more minutes of trying her best to keep up with his lead, he
squeezed the back of her thigh and asked, "Do you want to try a different
posi on?"

Elena bit her lip. With Ma , they had only done basic missionary, and it
hadn't lasted very long. She had no idea how to answer Damon's ques on.
But she wanted to learn, and she trusted him. Swallowing nervously, she
said, "Sure. Whatever you want."

He smiled. "Have you ever been on top before?"

She shook her head.

"Your ex needs a good smack," he mu ered under his breath. He pulled

out and rolled onto his back. "Now straddle my hips and just, you know,
lower yourself onto me."

That didn't sound too difficult. With his help, she managed to get into the
right posi on without any trouble. "Now you're in control," he told her
with a grin. "You set the pace. You do what feels good for you."
Elena experimented with raising and lowering herself, trying to find a
gentle rhythm again. Her forehead furrowed with concentra on.

"One li le sugges on," Damon said. She li ed her face to his with a
ques oning look. "Roll your pelvis on me. Seriously. It's way easier than
li ing your body up and down all the me. And it puts more pressure on
places that will feel good for you." She must have given him a skep cal
look, because he added, "I swear!"

She rolled her pelvis. One, twice. A third me. Oh yes, that was much
easier. And oh, he was right about something else, too. It did feel really
good. When she lted her hips forward, a part of his body brushed against
her most sensi ve spot. She could feel the intensity building each me she
pushed up against it.

Damon seemed to sense what her body was close to. With both hands, he
reached for her breasts, tweaking her nipples again and making her moan.
She increased her speed a li le, pressing harder on her forward mo ons.
God, that felt amazing! Just when she didn't think she could take the
sensa on anymore without losing her mind, she groaned louder and her
en re body clenched up ght. She began to shake with spasms, bracing her
palms against the ma ress on either side of his arms as she gulped for air.
Before she could collapse onto him, he li ed his upper body to a si ng
posi on and pulled her against his chest, one hand stroking her hair and
the other holding her in place as she rode out her release.

When Elena could finally catch her breath again, she clung to him, s ll
shuddering with a ershocks.

"See why you being on top can be decidedly…uh…advantageous?" he

murmured, dropping so kisses to the side of her throat.

Elena nodded against his shoulder. "That was intense!"

In response, he rolled them both onto their sides. His chest glistened with
sweat in the so light. Feeling brave in the wake of her orgasm, she leaned
forward and licked a trail over his nipple, and he gasped with pleasure.
Her right leg was now hooked over Damon's thigh, and as he plunged
forward she realized he wasn't done yet. He leaned closer to capture her
lips, his arms wrapping around her waist and pulling her against him. His
movements began to pick up speed. He was so hot, and she could hear his
breathing becoming labored again, like before when she'd been stroking
him. It didn't take a genius to realize he was close. She pushed herself
against him as he drove into her, trying her best to keep up, wan ng to
make this good for him.

Tearing his lips from hers, he pressed his face into the curve of her neck
once more. Every exhala on felt like a furnace blast on her skin. His hands
dropped to clutch her bu ocks, pulling her against him with each frenzied
thrust. Then he bucked against her, groaning low and deep and long. He
clutched her body ght to his, shuddering, swea ng, gasping for air. Elena
didn't know what to do, so she just held onto him, running her fingers
through his hair over and over as she waited for him to catch his breath.

Finally Damon pulled away from her a few inches, holding her gaze across
the pillow with red eyes. He wore a blissed-out, sa ated smile.

For a while neither of them spoke. Then, hesitantly, she asked, "Was it…
um…okay?"

His expressive eyes widened. "Are you kidding? Elena, it was amazing!
You're amazing," he exclaimed. "And it will only get be er from here." He
kissed her again, as if to assure her he meant it.

"Really?"

"I wouldn't lie to you."

A stab of guilt passed through her at his words, but she tried to push it
away. "It was incredible for me, too. I never knew it could be like that. Feel
like that. It literally took my breath away for a few moments there." She
paused, smiling shyly. "Wow."

"Wow, indeed."
They talked for a while longer, about poems and books and things, un l
they were both yawning too much to even get a complete sentence out
without interrup ng themselves. Damon gave her a quick kiss goodnight,
and she rolled over onto her right side, facing the wall. Her mind was
spinning, but she was just so red. She couldn't keep her eyes open a
moment longer.

Just before she dri ed off, she felt his arm slide over her waist to rest his
hand on her stomach. His body pressed up against her back. It was
surprisingly comfortable.

"Goodnight, Elena," he whispered, giving her a small squeeze.

"Goodnight."

Then she fell into an exhausted, yet blissful sleep.

A/N Special thanks to someonestolemyshoes49 for proofreading this

chapter for me. Thank you for reading! I hope you guys liked it. Please let
me know your thoughts by leaving a review in the li le box below. It would
really make my day! I love and appreciate you guys SO much! xo
14. Chapter 14
Chapter 14

When Elena woke up, she was shivering. The first thing she did was pull the
sheets ghter around her. The second was to remember where she was,
and just what had happened last night. Her eyes flew open, and she sat
upright, clutching the blankets to her bare chest as her panicky gaze swept
the dimly lighted room. Damon was no longer beside her and the
bathroom door stood open, so he must have gone downstairs. She hoped
he wouldn't be gone long. It was weird and awkward enough waking up in
a strange house—the last thing she wanted was to have to get dressed and
go downstairs alone. What if she ran into his uncle and had to fumble for
an explana on of why she was there? What if that informa on then got
back to her father? God, that would be a nightmare!

She shuddered again. The coals in the fireplace had gone dark—no wonder
she woke up cold. The heavy drapes adorning the tall windows to her right
were closed, but a sliver of bright morning light sliced between where they
came together. She frowned at it, hoping she hadn't slept too late.

At that moment the door opened and the intermingled aromas of fresh
coffee and chocolate flooded the room.

"I brought you hot cocoa," Damon assured her, smiling as he no ced she
was awake. He was wearing his black pajama bo oms topped with a grey
sweater. For warmth, she assumed.

Elena lay back down, pressing her head into the pillow and snuggling under
the covers. "What me is it?" She s fled a yawn with the back of her hand.

"Ten past eight." He came around to her side and set a steaming mug on
the night table not far from her head. It smelled tantalizing, and her mouth
immediately began to water.
Si ng down on the edge of the bed, Damon leaned over so he could see
her face. With a small grin, he asked, "What me do you need to be home,
sleepyhead?"

They hadn't fallen asleep un l some me in the wee hours of the morning,
and Elena's mind was s ll groggy. The last thing she wanted to do was
leave her cozy nest of blankets and head out into the cold. Once she got
home, she'd have to face her father and lie to him about where she'd been,
and she worried she wouldn't be able to convincingly pull it off. Nor was
she looking forward to leaving here. Damon's bed was comfy, and if he'd
only get back in it and join her, it would be even comfier.

"Um…nine, I guess." She rose back up a bit, bracing herself on one elbow
as she reached for the mug and took a sip. "Mmm. Thank you."

"You're welcome. How are you feeling this morning?"

How was she feeling? Why was he…Oh. About that. Right. "Um…" She
broke eye contact. "Fine. Good. You?"

Damon chuckled. "I feel great. How could I not, waking up with a hot naked
girl in my bed? Especially one who looks so damn cute when she's asleep—
even when she's drooling all over my pillow."

Flushing, Elena protested, "I don't drool!" A self-conscious laugh slipped

out. "Do I?"

Smiling, he leaned forward for a second, but then he seemed to catch

himself and straightened back up. She had the flee ng idea that he'd been
about to kiss her.

"Just a li le," he teased, standing and going to kneel in front of the

fireplace. "Give me five minutes and I'll have this room warming up nicely
again."

She knew she should probably start ge ng dressed, but that would mean
having to leave her warm li le cocoon. Instead she propped her head a
li le higher on the pillow and drank some more hot sweet cocoa, watching
Damon as he re-started the fire.

Once he had the flames going, he turned back to her. "You look
comfortable."

Elena smiled. "I am." She s ll wasn't really sure of the proper e que e for
Friends With Benefits, but if she said or did something inappropriate, she'd
just have to trust that he'd let her know. So, mustering her courage, she
pa ed the ma ress beside her.

Damon's eyes flared, and his face broke into a grin. The next thing she
knew, he'd leapt onto the bed, landing on his side to face her. He was
looking at her with that expression again. The one she was growing to
understand meant he was thinking about kissing her. Not just kissing her,
touching her. And, well, doing other things.

The familiar ghtening down below kicked in as her heart began to race.
She set her mug back on the night table and turned to him with a small
smile.

"Can you spare a half hour?" he asked in that low, seduc ve voice.

Wow, he hadn't been kidding—the temperature really had shot up in here

fast! Elena looked into those mesmerizing ocean-blue eyes. She knew
those eyes could pull her in and drown her in their depths if she wasn't
careful. But she would be careful. Very careful. She had to be.

"I think I can manage that."

He grinned, clearly pleased, and reached out a hand to stroke the side of
her face.

Then at last he leaned in and kissed her.

It was about ten minutes a er nine when Elena walked in her front door.
Damon had dropped her off a block away from her house, at her request
so that her dad wouldn't no ce her climbing out of his Jeep. To her pleased
surprise, Damon had leaned over and given her a quick kiss goodbye. On
the cheek, not on the lips, but s ll. She knew her face was pink, but if
anyone commented on it, she just planned to blame it on the cold
mountain morning air.

"Morning," her father greeted her from the kitchen, open paper and
steaming cup of coffee in their usual places on the table in front of him.

"Morning, Dad." She hung up her coat, and came into the doorway. "The
Clutch was swamped last night! It's been a good week. You'll be happy to
know we're running in the black again."

He looked up at her with a smile. "Wonderful! Now if only we can make

that a regular occurrence from here on."

"Fingers crossed." Elena paused. "So, Damon dropped by last night. When
he saw how busy I was, he took the coffee pot from my hand and started
to fill mugs. You should have seen him, Dad! He was a natural. The
customers loved him!"

One of Grayson's eyebrows arched. "Really? That was awfully nice of him."
An amused grin curved his lips. "So, are you s ll insis ng you two are just
friends?"

Elena flushed again, breaking eye contact. "Yes, of course. Because we

are."

They were s ll just friends, weren't they? In fact, they were the very
defini on of Friends With Benefits now, as far as she understood it. Which
was exactly what she'd wanted. Wasn't it? So why did things feel like they'd
changed dras cally between them now? And would this become a
problem in the future? God, she hoped not.
Her dad interrupted her fre ng. "You should invite him over some me.
How about dinner next Sunday? Whaddya think? Feel like roas ng a
chicken and showing off your cooking skills?"

Elena's eyes narrowed as she thought about that. Sundays were the only
days she and Jeremy actually got to eat meals with their father, as the
Clutch was closed that day. And now that they were older, one or both of
them were o en off doing other things over lunch. But Sunday dinner was
their family me. And her father wanted her to invite Damon over next
weekend to join them? He obviously thought Damon was important in his
daughter's life and wanted to get to know him be er. She wondered if her
dad would feel the same way if he knew the truth about what had
happened last night. S ll, asking Damon to come over next Sunday didn't
seem like a terrible idea. It might even end up being a lot of fun.

"Sounds like a plan," she replied, li ing her knapsack from the floor. "I'll ask
him next me we talk, and let you know." With that, she made her way
down the hallway to her bedroom to get changed for church.

Damon was hauling an armful of kindling up to his room to replenish the

now depleted wood-box when he heard his uncle call his name. A er he
re-filled the receptacle, he tro ed down to the library to find out what
Zach wanted.

"Morning," he said as he entered the room. "Just had to drop off some

firewood. What's up?"

Zach put down The Herald and raised his eyes to his nephew. "By any
chance did you have company last night?" he asked, his face carefully,
deliberately serious. "Thought I heard voices earlier."

Damon's eyebrows jumped in surprise. He'd thought they'd been quiet

enough, and that he'd succeeded in ge ng Elena out of here undetected.
Clearly his uncle was more aware than he'd given him credit for.
"Um…" He opted for an accompanying 'hey, guess you caught me' kind of
guilty smirk. Maybe it would be be er at this point to just let Zach jump to
his own conclusions.

His uncle broke out into a wide, toothy smile. "Really? You? Mr. Self-
Proclaimed Hermit? What happened to the whole 'I've sworn off women
forever' thing?"

"What makes you so sure my company was a woman?"

"Please." Zach shook his head, raising a skep cal brow. "I've been around
the block a few mes in my younger days, you know. Plus," he added, "I
heard her laugh as you snuck her out this morning."

Damon couldn't help wondering if he knew who his guest had been. He
assumed not, since his uncle and Grayson Gilbert were friends, and Zach
knew full well that Elena was four years his nephew's junior and s ll in high
school. Damon was pre y sure if his guest's iden ty was known, he would
have heard the first of several lectures about it already.

"You got me," he admi ed, lazy smirk s ll in place. "Just blowing off some
steam. No harm in that, right?"

"Depends. Does she know that's all it was?"

With a small nod, Damon assured him, "Yep. It's all good."

Zach stood and came toward him. "I'm happy you're finally trying to move
on with your life a li le. I really am. In fact, the only thing that would make
me happier would be for you to start talking to you father and brother
again."

Damon grimaced, resis ng rolling his eyes. Don't count on it, he thought.

His uncle kept right on as if he hadn't no ced Damon's change in facial

expression. "But just promise me you'll be careful. Mys c Falls is a small
town, and rumors travel pre y fast around here." He put a hand on
Damon's shoulder and looked him right in the eyes. "Be very sure any
women you hook up with know the score. In advance."

Chuckling mirthlessly, Damon stepped out from under his uncle's touch.
"Nothing to worry about there. We're just friends."

"If you say so."

Seemingly sa sfied, Zach returned to his paper. With a nearly silent sigh
Damon decided it might be a good me to head down to the gym to avoid
any more discussion of this par cular topic.

He knew he didn't have to worry about Elena falling for him. This had been
her idea, and she'd been very clear with him about what she expected out
of their li le arrangement. She was leaving for college in August and
wanted no emo onal strings. Which was fine with him. It was all he could
handle right now, anyway. A er Katherine and Stefan's betrayal, the last
thing he needed was to let himself get a ached to anyone.

Never again.

Elena was sweet, and he cared about her, but there was no point in le ng
himself think about her in any capacity other than just as a good friend. It
wasn't ever going to be more than it was right now. And that was
undoubtedly for the best anyway.

As he warmed up with an easy jog on the treadmill, his thoughts returned

to Katherine, and he realized something. Before a month ago, though he'd
hated himself for it, he used to dwell on her every day. Every hour of every
day, in fact. She'd haunted his dreams, tormen ng him with memories of
be er mes, then painful flashes of her cruel infidelity. But somewhere
along the way over the past few weeks, his fixa on on her had lessened.
Suddenly he recognized that something crucial inside him had shi ed. No
ma er what the future held, no ma er if she even showed up at his door
and prostrated herself at his feet, begging him for a second chance, he
could never ever even consider reconciling with her.
Because, Damon realized with a weird mixture of shock and melancholy, he
was no longer in love with Katherine. He'd never believed it could happen,
and then, without his even no cing, it had. The twinge of grief came in
realizing that her massive, important, and—whether he liked it or not—
emo onally pivotal role in his life was really finally over, for good. Forever.

Upping both his speed and incline, he began to run as fast as he could. The
slight feeling of loss ebbed away like an errant breeze that had wa ed
through his mind. It was replaced with a grim sense of relief. This discovery
le him feeling so much lighter somehow. Freer.

Thank fuck.

Monday morning dawned bright, sunny and frigidly cold. March was a
fickle month, always vacilla ng between her desire to welcome Spring's
life-giving warmth or to remain stuck in Old Man Winter's icy embrace.
Elena's boots squeaked on the frozen ground as she walked to the bus
stop.

Once aboard, Bonnie greeted her with excitement. As she'd warned, she
had called Elena right on the dot of noon the previous day, but due to
parental ears nearby, Elena had provided only the vaguest details of how
her night with Damon had gone. It was clear from her best friend's eager
expression that she expected a full run-down now that they were face to
face.

Bonnie pulled her into a hug the moment Elena dropped into the seat
beside her. "My baby girl is finally a woman," she declared near her ear,
chuckling.

Elena flushed as she extracted herself. "Shhh! And what are you even
talking about? There was no change to my…um…status!"

Waving her hand dismissively, Bonnie said, "Yeah, but that first me didn't
even really count. This is way different. It's for real-real now. And I need to
hear all about it!"
There was a sudden burst of raucous laughter from a few seats behind
them, and Elena swiveled her head, grateful for the interrup on. Jeremy
was si ng at the back of the bus, goofing around with some of his
basketball buddies. Vickie was nowhere to be seen today. Maybe she'd
go en a ride to school with Tyler again.

Before Elena could really give any thought to it, Bonnie dragged her
a en on back to the conversa on at hand. "I know you're not gonna tell
me anything juicy right here and now, but could you at least feel sorry
enough for me to provide me with some yes or no deets? Star ng with the
most important: was it good?"

Elena couldn't hold back a grin. She nodded.

"Did he make you…you know…again?" Bonnie winked knowingly so Elena

couldn't fail to be crystal clear about her meaning.

Flushing harder, she nodded again.

"How many mes?"

"Um…" Elena's eyes dropped to her knapsack res ng on the floor between
her boots.

"Whoa."

She looked back at Bonnie, this me not even trying to hide her smile.
Leaning close to her friend's ear, she whispered, "Once Saturday night, and
once Sunday morning. I don't really know what normal is, but that seems
pre y good, right?"

Bonnie snorted, her dark eyes shining. "Yep. Especially for your first me
together." She paused, quirking the corner of her lip. "And second." Then
her face grew more serious. "I didn't the first bunch of mes. But Damon is
older and more experienced than my ex. I'm sure he knows exactly what
he's doing. You are one lucky bitch."
Elena just grinned.

"And your li le FWB thing? How's that working out a er this weekend?
S ll gonna tell me you two are just good friends?" Bonnie made air quotes
to emphasize the last two words.

"Yes," Elena replied firmly. "Just friends. I some mes kinda wish it could be
different between us, but there's just no way."

One black eyebrow arched. "Be honest. Are you developing feelings for
him, Elena? It'd only be natural a er-"

"No," she cut in. "Not falling in love. Just friends. Can we drop this topic
now, please?" Elena stared straight ahead at the green pleather back of the
seat in front of her. It was clear she had no inten on of talking about it
anymore.

Bonnie narrowed her eyes. She knew there was a huge chance Elena was
probably already in way over her head, whether she was willing to admit it
or not. The more her friend kept stubbornly insis ng on the just friends
thing, the more Bonnie worried. Elena was undoubtedly going to end up
ge ng hurt at some point between now and leaving for college in August,
but Bonnie would be there for her, like she always was, to comfort her and
get her through it. It was what best friends did—they had to let each other
make mistakes some mes, and then be there to help pick up the pieces.
She knew it was just a part of growing up, and learning how to cope. So
she did as Elena requested and shut up.

For now.

That evening at the coffee shop was quiet, as Elena had expected. She
finished all her homework before eight o'clock even rolled around, and was
si ng at the counter with her usual mug of hot chocolate and a novel,
when she remembered JAI's le er.
Though it was at home tucked into the book in her drawer with the others,
she recalled the content well, having read it over mul ple mes. Feeling
inspired, she tucked her bookmark into her book and set it aside. She
pulled her notebook from her bag, turned it to a blank page, and began to
write.

Dear JAI,

Your last le er almost has me at a loss for words. My own family life has
been so very different from yours. It's difficult for me to imagine the people
I love trea ng me as shabbily as yours have treated you. I know I'm lucky to
have the family and friends I do, and your situa on has made me even
more grateful for them.

And even more angry on your behalf.

I'm SO sorry you've had to go through all this. It just doesn't seem fair that
life could hand one young man so much heartache in his short life.

You have every right to be angry, and to want some me alone. You have
every right to need space away from those who hurt you to grieve and to
heal. Don't let anyone try to convince you otherwise. Take care of yourself
right now.

I have to tell you, the fact that you have made a new friend whom you feel
could be someone special makes me hopeful of a change for the be er in
your life. Although I don't really know you, I truly believe you deserve
happiness, and to eventually let yourself open up to someone, and learn to
trust again. So I'm pleased to learn you're at the very least open to the
possibility with this woman.

All the best,

Miss LL

Elena read it over once, decided it sounded like it could have been wri en
by a woman a good ten years older, as she'd intended, and then tore it out
and folded it up. She'd just finished tucking the le er into the front pocket
of her knapsack when the bells over the door nkled.

Her heart leapt. Glancing over with a smile, she hoped to find Damon, but
was both surprised and slightly disappointed to see her brother striding
toward her with a worried look on his face.

She stood and looked at him with concern. It was rare for him to come into
the shop in the evenings. From the determined expression he wore, he
clearly needed to speak to her about something.

"Hey, Jer. What's up?"

"I just got a call from Kelly Donovan. She says Vickie didn't come home last
night."

Elena's brows knit together. "I no ced she wasn't on the bus today."

Jeremy took a seat on one of the stools. "Nope. But I just figured she was
sick or something. She told her mom yesterday she was headed to the
Lockwood's for dinner. That was the last me Kelly heard from her. She was
hoping I knew where Vick was, but I haven't talked to her since Friday."

"What did Tyler say?"

"He claims she le about nine. Says he hasn't been in touch with her
since." Jeremy looked up and held his sister's gaze. "Her phone's not on. I
don't like this."

Elena sighed, pressing her lips into a thin line. A ball of deep cold had
formed in her chest. "Me, neither. Do you think he's lying?"

He swiped a hand over his eyes and through his hair. "I don't know. My gut
ins nct is…yeah. Yeah, I think he's a lying piece of shit."

"Has her mother called the cops to report her missing yet?"
"Kelly wants to wait and see if she shows up tonight. If not, she's gonna
report her missing first thing tomorrow. She wants to touch base with all
Vick's friends first, just in case she's off sulking somewhere about some
fight with Lockwood and deliberately avoiding everyone."

Elena grasped at that idea, wan ng to ease her brother's worry. "That's
probably exactly what it is, Jer. They probably got into a big fight, and she's
hiding out at one of her girlfriend's places. I'm sure she'll be home by
tomorrow, and then her mom will ground her for a week or two and soon
this will all blow over."

Jeremy looked up at her again, his light brown eyes filled with worry. "I
hope you're right."

"Me, too. If you hear anything else could you text me please?"

"I will. I've sent Vick like twenty texts already. Hopefully she'll smarten the
hell up and reply to me soon." He paused, then added, "And to her mom,
of course."

Elena agreed, and he got up to leave. She was worried Jeremy might head
over to the Lockwood's and confront Tyler before the local cops got a
chance to speak with him first. But there was nothing she could do to stop
him if he decided to, so she just hoped for the best.

The moment her brother was out of sight, Elena scrabbled for her cell
phone and called Bonnie.

"Hey Li le Miss Sex Ki en. What's up?"

She ignored her friend's teasing gree ng. "Remember that stuff I told you
about Vickie Donovan? That I'd seen bruises, and then later overheard her
arguing with Tyler at the Valen ne's Party?"

"Yeah, of course. How could I forget? Why?"

"It might be nothing—God, I really hope it's nothing—but, she's gone
missing, Bon. And we have to find her. I have to make sure she's okay."

A/N Sorry for the long wait, guys! August was a crazy busy month. Huge
thanks to someonestolemyshoes49 for proofreading this chapter for me.
Hope you like it. The plot is star ng to thicken! Please review? You guys are
the best. xox
15. Chapter 15
Chapter 15

Tuesday morning, much to Elena's frustra on, winter s ll maintained its

freezing grip on Mys c Falls. Her breath made white puffs in the air before
her face as she climbed onto the school bus behind her brother.

She frowned a er a quick scan of the faces. S ll no sign of Vickie.

Jeremy had called Kelly Donovan before they le the house this morning
but had go en no answer, so they had no idea if Vickie had been located
yet or not. Elena was growing more and more worried. Something felt very
wrong about the girl's disappearance. Right now she was just praying that
Vickie would turn up soon, embarrassed and ashamed about running off
maybe, but at least safe and sound.

As soon as Elena sat down beside Bonnie, she found out the latest. Vickie's
mother had officially reported her missing. The local police, as well as
some pitching in from neighboring towns, had already begun an exhaus ve
door-to-door search of Mys c Falls and the surrounding area this morning.

The whole bus seemed to be discussing it, including the driver. Everyone
had opinions. Most of them were nega ve, blaming Vickie for being a wild
child and just running off with no thought at all to her worried mother.
Elena heard several students express sympathy for Tyler, but not a single
word of suspicion. He was a Lockwood. Therefore he was above reproach,
at least in the eyes of most of the ci zens of Mys c Falls. She was sure the
police, however, would be much more thorough in their inves ga on. At
least she hoped so.

Jeremy sat silent in a seat to himself, arms crossed over his chest as he
stared out the window and tried to ignore the conversa ons flying around
him. Elena felt bad for him, but she knew the only comfort he'd find would
be hearing that his friend had been located.
At school, it was the prime topic of gossip on everyone's lips, too. Elena
couldn't seem to escape the whispered specula ons. It was all anyone
could talk about. Mr. Tanner had to call her name three mes in History, as
her mind was so distracted wondering what the police might turn up. The
bell signaling the end of the school day brought more relief than usual.

A er they got off the bus, Jeremy stopped her on the front steps before
they could enter the house. "Ty has no idea where she is."

"You talked to Tyler?"

He nodded. "You were right though—they did get into a big fight on
Sunday night. Apparently it was a pre y bad one. He lost his temper, told
her they should just break-up. He said Vick stormed off mad."

Frowning, Elena looked hard at her brother. "You believe him?"

Jeremy shrugged. "I don't know. He does seem pre y worried about her.
He says he's doing everything he can to help find her. Claimed his dad was
even hiring a private inves gator. But it could all be bullshit to cover his
own ass. Nobody talks about it, but we both know the guy's got a violent
side." He sighed. "I don't like this, 'Lena. She'd be er turn up soon."

"I hope so." With a heavy heart, Elena went inside to get ready for work.
She had a bad feeling about all this. Clearly her brother felt the same way.

The Clutch was quiet tonight, and Elena sat behind the counter doing her
History homework. The few customers she'd had just picked up orders to
go. Only Mr. Donnelly s ll remained at side table nursing the last of his
coffee as he read the paper. He didn't mind if she did schoolwork while he
was there. In fact, he o en would help her out with more complicated
math problems if she asked him. If she remembered correctly, he used to
be a school teacher many years ago.

About an hour before close, she was pleasantly startled when Damon
walked in. She hadn't known if he would show up tonight—they'd texted a
few mes since Sunday, but hadn't made any firm plans to see each other
this week yet. Elena's pulse started racing the moment she saw his face. It
was suddenly far too warm in here. She shrugged off her cardigan and
prayed he didn't no ce how intensely she always reacted to him.

"Hey," she greeted him with a smile, holding the carafe ready to fill his mug
before he'd even had a chance to unscrew the top.

"Hey." He flashed that crooked smile she had come to adore so much.
"What's up?"

Elena's smile fell away, and she bit her lip. Should she tell him about
Vickie? He didn't know any of these people, so she wasn't sure it was fair
to burden him with having to listen to all her worries.

Before she could decide, Mr. Donnelly stood and walked up to the counter,
se ng his empty mug before her. She se led his small bill and wished him
goodnight as he stepped out into the cold, leaving the two of them alone.

Damon took a seat on a stool and sipped his coffee. He raised his eyes to
hers, holding her gaze. "What's got you looking so concerned tonight,
Elena? Something happen since we last talked?"

She blew out a li le puff of air. Well, they were friends, and good friends
confided in each other. So what the heck, right? She began to tell him
about her brother's friend Vickie, her disappearance, and what Elena had
seen and heard over the past few months. She even men oned the
suspicious le er from the girl with the controlling boyfriend from one of
Miss Lonely Love's column's back in January. Damon didn't need to know
she hadn't read it in The Herald like everyone else had.

When she finished, he was frowning. "You think her douchebag of a

boyfriend had something to do with this?"

Elena sighed. "I don't know anything for sure, but I can't help being
suspicious. He's denied it, of course. I'm sure the police have probably
already ques oned him a few mes. But if he was a suspect for anything,
he wouldn't have been at school today."

"That's true." He took another drink from his mug, looking though ul.
"Well hopefully she'll show up tonight. Her mother must be fran c."

"She is. And so is Jer, although he's trying to hide it."

"He got a crush on her?"

Elena smiled. "He says not, but I think so."

"Poor kid."

"Yeah, he's really worried." Before Damon could say anything else, her eyes
flew wide. "Oh! I nearly forgot! What are you up to on Sunday?"

A smirk curved the corner of his lips. "Are you asking if you can come over
and…study…with me again?" He winked. "Because I'm totally free."

Heat flared high on Elena's cheeks. She chuckled and broke eye contact to
begin wiping down the counter. "I was actually going to ask if you wanted
to come over for dinner. With my family, not just the two of us," she added.

Damon's eyebrows shot up. "Whose idea was that?" he wondered.

"My dad's. I think he wants to get to know the new guy I've been hanging
out with lately."

"In that case, count me in."

Elena eyes flew to his. "You sure?"

"Why not? And if you want, you could s ll come over to my place for a few
hours earlier in the day. I'd invite you to spend the night again, but I
assume that wouldn't fly two weekends in a row."
If only I could, she thought. "Um, no. Probably not a great idea. I hated
having to lie to my dad last me. But Sunday a ernoon should be fine."
She smiled. "I'll come by a er church. Then we'll have a few hours before
we need to be back to my place for cooking and awkward conversa ons
with my family."

"You're cooking?"

With a laugh, Elena replied, "Yeah. Be er make sure the number for Poison
Control's saved into your speed dial."

Damon snorted, and stood to come around the counter and grab the
broom from the closet. Next thing she knew he was sweeping up, unasked.
She shook her head with a small smile and went back to her wiping. It was
too bad, really. He seemed like he would make awesome boyfriend
material.

On Wednesday there was s ll no sign of Vickie. Tyler wasn't in school that

day, either. Elena assumed, correctly, that he was busy answering ques ons
and being of assistance to the police with the search. That morning, the
en re student body was called into the gymnasium for an assembly about
it. It was a rare occurrence for one of their own to go missing, and they
wanted to make sure all the students understood the severity of the
situa on, and how important it was to come forward if anyone had any
informa on at all regarding Vickie's disappearance.

Unfortunately no one did.

On Thursday The Herald published a special full-page report about the

inves ga on on the front page, including interviews with Mayor Lockwood
and one of Vickie's teachers. Kelly Donovan had declined to speak with
reporters, which in Grayson Gilbert's opinion was very smart of her.

None-the-less, the paper had gleaned quite a lot of personal informa on

about Vickie's family life. They printed that the Donovan's had had an
extremely vola le marriage, and that her father, whom she had been quite
close to, had up and le his family when she was only eleven. Although
Mitchell Donovan had wri en a few le ers, and sent gi s from me to
me, he hadn't set a foot back in Mys c Falls since. It was rumored he was
out on the West Coast somewhere, but nobody seemed to know exactly
where, why, or with whom. The police were not aware that Vickie had
been in touch with her father for over a year. Possibly longer.

Elena knew most of this stuff already, having dated Ma for three months.

By the me Friday hit, Jeremy was nearly going s r-crazy with worry. The
rest of the town was pre y freaked out right along with him. It was the
primary topic of conversa on at the Clutch that night, just as it had been
the previous three evenings.

Jeremy and Bonnie sat at the counter drinking coffee and talking so ly,
most definitely not working on the homework si ng open in front of
them. Elena kept their mugs topped up, but she was busy taking care of
customers un l the place began to thin out a bit around ten-thirty.

With a sigh, she pushed a strand of hair behind her ears and went behind
the counter to join with them for a break. As she was pouring herself a hot
chocolate and asked her brother again if he had heard anything new, the
bells over the door nkled.

Elena whipped her head up, hoping it might be Damon. She'd last seen him
when he'd dropped her off in front of her house a er work on Tuesday. He
hadn't kissed her goodbye that night, not even on the cheek, and she
admi ed to herself with some chagrin that she felt disappointed by it. Even
though she knew she was being silly.

It was not Damon.

It was, however, someone she also had in mate knowledge of, although
not for quite some me.

He was tall, with closely-cropped dark blonde hair and broad shoulders,
and he strode into Gilbert's Coffee Clutch with a determined expression on
his face. The moment his gaze locked with Elena's, he broke into a big
smile.

Elena eyes went wide, and she couldn't help but return it. "Ma !" she
exclaimed, coming around from behind the counter and hurrying toward
him. She greeted him with a hug. "It's so great to see you! Although I wish
it were for a different reason. Have you guys found out anything new?"

His smile fell away. "Not yet. Mom is going mental. I thought I'd be er get
my ass home and support her. The cops have nothing. And they can't
locate my dad, so he doesn't even know she's missing yet."

With a small frown, Elena asked, "Is there any chance she could be with
him?"

"That's what I was just wondering," Jeremy interjected, coming to stand

beside them.

Ma 's eyes darted between the siblings. "I doubt it. He can't be bothered
with us. We wouldn't even know how to contact him. And anyways, Vick
would never go off with him without telling Mom. She knows what a
deadbeat he is, and how he le us all in the lurch five years ago."

"Yeah, that's true," Jeremy agreed. Vickie rarely men oned her father, but
when she did it was with bi erness. He actually suspected her cynical
a tude was just a coping skill, and she missed him more than she was
willing to admit. "What about Lockwood Junior? You believe he hasn't
heard from her since she le his place Sunday night?"

Ma shrugged. "No idea. Haven't talked to him. I've only been back in
town for a couple hours."

A few more customers le , and Elena poured coffee for Ma as the four of
them moved to an empty table. They talked about Vickie at length, pooling
all the informa on about their ideas and suspicions. Ma listened to it all
with growing concern, but every once in a while he would glance over at
Elena, his face would brighten, and he'd flash her a li le grin.
Jeremy and Bonnie had just men oned needing to head out when the bells
rang again. This me, when Elena's eyes shot to the front entrance, she
saw the familiar black felt fisherman's cap she'd been hoping for earlier.

Grinning in gree ng, she waved Damon over to join them. He took off his
coat, then pulled out a chair from the table behind theirs and straddled it,
dragging it closer to the space between Elena and Ma . Ma , clearly a bit
surprised, shuffled over to make room for him.

Since Damon had already met Bonnie and Jeremy previously, they greeted
each other with a perfunctory nod and a quick "hey". That le Ma , who
was looking at the new arrival with curiosity.

"Ma , this is my…um…friend, Damon." Elena turned to Damon. "This is an

old friend of mine, Ma Donovan. He just got back into town." As an
a erthought, she added, "He goes to Duke."

"Nice to meetcha," Ma said politely.

Damon studied at him for a moment, brows drawn in, before replying,
"You, too." Then he turned his a en on back to Elena, leaning in close to
her ear but speaking just loud enough that the others could hear. "Sorry
I'm so late. I meant to get here sooner and give you a hand, but my uncle
needed my help clearing and sal ng the whole driveway. Was it a zoo in
here again?"

Elena stared at him with surprise. He hadn't even told her he was dropping
by tonight, yet he was talking like she had been expec ng him, and he'd
been running late. Had she maybe missed a text? With a small shrug she
replied, "That's okay. It was busy, but I can handle it."

"I know you can. But we've proven how great a team we make together. I'll
be here by six tomorrow night—promise."

Before Elena could respond, Bonnie interjected, "On that note, I'd be er
get going." She flared her eyes at Elena, obviously in reac on to Damon's
comments.
"Yeah, me too," Jeremy agreed, standing up beside Bonnie. He was
oblivious to any weirdness in the room; all his thoughts were stuck on
Vickie.

They said their goodnights and headed out into the dark. The last two
remaining customers le money on their table and shuffled out right on
their heels.

And then there was just the three of them.

Damon edged his seat closer to Elena's and casually slid an arm along the
back of her chair, returning his a en on to Ma . "So you're Vickie's big
brother, huh?"

"Oh, you know my sister?"

"Not really. I only met her once, at the Lockwood's Valen ne's party last
month. She was with her boyfriend. What was his name? Trevor?" He
looked back to Elena for confirma on.

"Tyler," she corrected.

"Right, Tyler." Damon gave her shoulder a rub. "Thanks. You introduced me
to so many people that night—it's a bit hard to remember all the names."
He chuckled so ly.

Ma 's eyebrows flew up as he looked between them. "So I take it you

two…?"

Elena's face flushed beet red. "No! No." She pulled her back a few inches
away from the chair and Damon's lingering forearm. "We're just friends."

Ma snorted at her facial expression. He glanced at Damon again. Then he

smiled. "Cool. Well in that case, can I walk you home a er you close up?
It'll give us a chance to catch up with each other. It's been too long."
Her gaze darted to Damon. He wasn't looking at her now. He seemed to be
searching for any signs of dirt under his fingernails. There were two spots
of color high on each of his cheekbones. Maybe it was from the cold air
he'd just come in from. She tried to recall if he always got those red
patches on cold nights. Then she remembered that Ma was wai ng for
her response.

"Actually," she started, intending to tell him that she already had a li
home tonight. But before she could get the rest of the words out, the
metal legs of Damon's chair groaned as they were harshly pushed across
the linoleum.

He stood abruptly. "I have to take off, too. Just wanted to pop in for a
minute and say 'hi'. Great to meet you…um…Ma , right? Catch you later,
Elena." Grabbing his coat from the table behind him, he headed for the
door.

Elena was shocked by his strange behavior. So much so that she didn't even
say goodbye. A gust of cold air swirled inside as the door swung shut
behind him. Was it just her, or had the air go en chillier in here even
before he'd opened it?

She looked back at Ma . "Sure, company on my walk home would be nice.

I'll just balance the cash register and wash up this last batch of mugs, if you
don't mind wai ng."

She couldn't help feeling disappointed at Damon's sudden departure. His

unexpected appearance had pleased her, and she'd been hoping for some
alone me on the drive home he always offered. His whole demeanor had
seemed weird tonight, and she wasn't sure why. If it had been anyone
other than Damon, she'd probably think…no. It's not like he could be
jealous of Ma . Could he? She pushed that thought away, chuckling to
herself at the ridiculousness of it.

Damon slammed the front door of the boarding house behind him rather
harder than he'd intended. It was just past one in the morning, and his
uncle would be sound asleep. He stopped and listened for any sign of
movement in the large house. Other than the cking of the an que
grandfather clock in the adjacent drawing room, everything was silent.

Which was good. He wasn't in the mood to talk to anyone right now.

The most irrita ng part was that he knew damn fucking well he had no
right at all to be pissed off. He just…was.

Something about that Ma guy—the way he'd kept ogling Elena, the way
he'd insidiously worked his way into walking her home the very second
she'd explained to him that she and Damon weren't a couple—it just made
him want to punch something. Well, someone, if he was being honest.

But he couldn't say a word, couldn't even react around them. Because
Elena was right—they were just friends. Friends who'd recently seen each
other naked, sure, but only friends nonetheless.

So he'd scooted out of the coffee shop like his ass had been lit on fire,
jumped into his Jeep, and driven off without any des na on in mind. For
over an hour, he'd just roamed around the town of Mys c Falls and the
back roads surrounding it. He had avoided driving down her street,
however. It wouldn't do to be no ced by Elena and end up looking like
some kind of stalker. And, honestly, he really had no urge to come across
the two of them walking together.

This wasn't jealousy. Damon was not the jealous type. Never had been, not
even with Katherine. He'd always been quite confident in both himself and
whichever woman he was da ng. He'd never felt threatened by other guys,
never worried that the girl at his side might up and leave him for someone
else someday. It had always been Damon who'd done the leaving, a er all.
Well, before the whole Katherine and Stefan debacle, that is.

Was that what this was about? Had those two assholes turned him into
some kind of wussy ball of fucking insecurity now? This thought made
Damon so livid he could almost feel the steam rising from his ears.
Insecure, my ass, he fumed, stomping up the first riser of stairs and taking a
le in the direc on of the library instead of con nuing up to his room.
Clearly Zach had been reading in here before he'd gone to bed—the
embers in the fireplace were s ll glowing faintly, and the dark-paneled
room had not yet lost all its warmth.

Damon poured himself two inches of bourbon into one of his uncle's
precious crystal lowballs and dropped heavily into the wingchair nearest
the dying fire. The alcohol burned its way down his throat, and created a
hot li le ball in the pit of his stomach which slowly spread over his en re
body as he sipped. He stared out the tall window on the opposite side of
the room. The crescent moon glowed through the skeletal branches of the
ancient oak tree growing close to the house. It looked…peaceful,
somehow. He took a deep breath and exhaled slowly, le ng the caramel-y,
molasses-y a ertaste linger on his taste buds.

Katherine was his past. Elena was his present, at least sort of. Temporarily,
anyway. He had no idea who, if anyone, would be his future, should he be
so lucky as to have one. If he'd learned anything, it was that the most
important thing was to focus on the right here and right now. Here and
now. Which meant Elena. Screw Ma —the loser hadn't even given her a
good first me in the sack. She'd needed Damon to show her how
pleasurable sex could really be, something he was fully confident he'd
succeeded at. And he was hoping they'd have another round on Sunday
a ernoon, before he was supposed to go over and have dinner with her
family. So there was no need to be wary of her newly returned ex-
boyfriend. It was Damon whom she'd chosen to spend what li le free me
she had with. And anyway, she didn't want a boyfriend. She couldn't have
been clearer about that. Therefore there was nothing for him to worry
about.

Was there?

Dude, you've got to rein this insecurity shit in, he chas sed himself. It was
either that or leave town, and he didn't think he was ready to put Mys c
Falls and its ci zens behind him quite yet.
Maybe he'd just have to show Ma that Elena was currently…off the
market. Not without her permission, of course. He'd men on the idea to
her tomorrow evening a er she was done work, see what she thought
about maybe upping the ante of their publicly perceived rela onship a
li le bit.

Unless she ended up going home with Ma again.

At that thought, Damon upended the rest of his drink down his throat,
searing a blazing path the en re way to his stomach. Instead of heading up
to his room, he tro ed back down the steps and to the rear of the house to
the gym. Maybe ge ng in a round on the punching bag before sleep would
help burn off this excess energy. He seemed to have an abundance of it
lately.

Tonight it wouldn't be either his brother's or his ex's face he'd picture on
the bag, though.

A/N Thank you to someonestolemyshoes and siberia21 for pre-reading this

chapter for me, and another massive thanks to all of you who have
reviewed, favourited and recommended this story to your friends. You guys
are the best! Hope you liked this chapter. Please review and let me know
your thoughts? It would mean so much to me!
16. Chapter 16
Chapter 16

Elena woke up to a bright patch of sunlight across her quilt. She stretched
her arms out into the cool air and yawned. Turning to her alarm clock, she
realized it was nearly ten. But it was Saturday morning, and she didn't have
anywhere she needed to be for a few hours, so she didn't move to get out
from under her warm blanket fortress of solitude.

Ma had walked her home last night, and they'd had a good long chat.
She'd peppered him with ques ons about college life, and he'd answered
her as best he could. Duke was one of the universi es she was applying to,
and he'd seemed excited by the idea that she might be on campus with
him this coming fall.

And he hadn't hit on her, for which she was very thankful. Before he'd had
said goodnight, he'd invited her to come over to his mother's place this
a ernoon, said he'd be grateful for her company as a nice break from his
mother's tension and intermi ent freak-outs. Elena had told him she had a
lot of homework this weekend, and she'd have to let him know.

Her phone pinged on the nightstand by her bed, signaling the arrival of a
new text. She reached for it curiously.

It was Damon. Morning sleepyhead

Elena smiled. Maybe he didn't have a bug up his bu about Ma walking

her home last night a er all. The idea hadn't made any sense to her
anyway, but jealousy had been the only thing she'd been able to come up
with to jus fy his strange behavior.

A li le wary a er the way he'd acted the previous night, she just texted
back: Morning.
About thirty seconds later there was another ping. What are you up to
today?

Elena pursed her lips, frowning as she debated how to reply. But they'd
promised honesty. So she typed: Homework, then if I have me I might go
check up on Ma and his mom before work.

With a ght feeling in her gut, she hit Send, and hoped Damon wouldn't
get all weird about it. Ma was a friend, and anyway, he would be heading
back to school in a few days. Damon had no reason to be jealous.

She was up and dressed by the me he replied. Have a great a ernoon.

See you around 6.

Relief flooded over her. At least that was one thing she no longer had to
worry about today.

Jeremy le just a er noon to head over to the high school for basketball
prac ce, and her father was working at the coffee shop, which meant Elena
had the house to herself. The peace and quiet gave her plenty of me to
focus, and she completed all her History, Spanish and Algebra homework
by three-thirty. English could wait un l tomorrow—it was the perfect thing
to bring over to Damon's a er church.

Since she had a li le more than an hour to kill before she had to relieve her
father's shi , she decided to go over to Ma 's a er all. Vickie's
disappearance was never far from her thoughts, and she wanted to find
out if there was new informa on.

Her dad had walked to the Clutch this morning, so his car was s ll si ng in
the driveway. Grabbing the extra keys from the drawer in the kitchen, she
figured he wouldn't mind if she borrowed it for a quick visit.

The Donovan's lived on the west side of town. Their street was full of small
war- me bungalows, most in various stages of disrepair. The house where
Ma and Vickie had grown up was one of the nicer ones of the bunch, but
it was s ll in need of a fresh coat of paint, a new roof, and some other
exterior maintenance. None of which were probably going to be happening
any me soon. Kelly worked as a secretary at Dr. Fleming's office, but her
salary was barely enough to make ends meet, something Elena understood
all too well. Ma had been lucky enough to earn a full football scholarship
to Duke the previous year, but as far as Elena knew, Vickie's grades were
mediocre at best. Chances of her being able to afford to a end college
when the me came were pre y much nil. She wondered if Vickie felt
trapped in Mys c Falls, stuck in a dead-end li le town in the middle of
nowhere. If Tyler had really dumped her Sunday night, maybe she'd
decided to just run off to try to find a new life for herself somewhere else.
It was unfathomably cruel to vanish like that with no word to her mother,
but Elena suspected Vickie might not have been thinking straight. Teenage
girl's hormones could o en make them irra onal and selfish—something
else Elena got, although she'd so far kept a good handle on her own.

She parked along the curb and carefully stepped her way through the
footprints in the snow along the unshoveled path to the front door. Ma
wrenched it open a few seconds later. His tense expression morphed into a
wide smile the moment he saw her.

"Hey Elena. Didn't think you were gonna be able to pop by."

"I ended up with a bit of me to spare, so I figured I'd check in. How're you
guys doing today?" She came into the front hallway and toed off her boots.
"Anything new?"

Ma 's smile fell away. "Nope. Nada."

"How's your mom?"

"Not great. The not knowing is driving her mental, imagining all the worst
possible scenarios. I made her take a seda ve about an hour ago. She's
finally asleep."

"Poor Kelly. I can't even imagine. It's got the en re town freaked out. My
dad has given Jer and me more hugs this week than I think we've go en
since we were li le." Elena removed her jacket and perched on the edge of
the overstuffed couch in their small, messy living room. Moving some
papers out of the way, Ma took a seat beside her. He looked red, with
dark circles under his eyes. She wondered if he'd go en any sleep himself.

Reaching over to touch the back of his hand, she asked, "What about you,
Ma y? How are you holding up?"

He sighed. "I have some bad moments where I panic a li le, but mostly I'm
doing okay. I have to, for Mom. She needs me."

"Yeah, I get that. Don't forget to take care of yourself, too, though."

With a small smile, he said, "Well, I go a admit: seeing you again has been
great. Sorry I kinda fell ou a touch a er I le for school."

Elena lted her head slightly, a li le perplexed. It's not like she'd really
expected him to stay in regular contact. Sure they were friends, casual
friends, but they'd never been super close, especially a er they'd broken
up. "That's okay. I'm glad I can help take your mind off things, even if only
temporarily."

At that, Ma 's face grew serious, and he held her gaze, looking intently
into her eyes. He took her hand and sandwiched it between his larger
ones, rubbing his thumb over her palm. "We were good once," he said in
the tone of someone who had just recalled some long forgo en pleasant
memory. "Remember that, 'Lena? Remember when we were good?"

Mutely she nodded. She debated retrieving her hand, but didn't.

His voice grew so er, huskier. "We could be good again. I know we could. If
you were open to maybe giving us another try…"

Ma inched his head forward. With deepening chagrin, Elena realized he

was about to kiss her. Oh God, no! Adrenaline flooded through her as her
body shi ed into Panic Mode, and she pulled away from him, jumping to
her feet.
"I'm sorry, Ma , but I just can't."

His face flushed beet red and he frowned. "Don't apologize. I'm the one
who's sorry. I shouldn't have. I just thought maybe…"

"It's okay. You're under a lot of stress right now. I know. It's
understandable."

He stood, following her to the front door as she pulled her jacket back on.
"It's that Damon guy, isn't it? I saw the way you two looked at each other
last night. You said you were just friends, but that's not really true, is it?"

Elena stared at him, deba ng how to reply. Finally she exhaled in

submission and just shook her head.

"Thought so. Why the secrecy, then? Why not just admit it, and save us
both this a ernoon's embarrassment?"

"Um…" She shoved her feet into her boots. "It's…it's just sort of…
complicated. We aren't really…"

"Let me guess. You haven't defined your rela onship status yet, right? And
you didn't want to freak him out by telling me he was your boyfriend right
in front of him?"

Not exactly, but it'll do, Elena thought. With a relieved smile, she nodded.
"Something like that, yeah."

"I'm really sorry for, you know, earlier. I just thought maybe… Well, anyway.
Can we just forget that ever happened? Whaddya say?"

"It's already forgo en." She stood on her ptoes and gave Ma a quick hug
and kiss on the cheek. "I really hope you guys hear from her soon."

He sighed. It had an echoing regre ul sound to it. "Me, too."

On the short drive back to her house, Elena thought about the moment
when Ma had tried to kiss her. There was no doubt in her mind about it.
He was sweet and she liked him, but she was no longer a racted to him.
The only guy she wanted to kiss, the only guy she wanted to be with was
Damon. Her feelings for him were…intense. And growing stronger every
day.

As she pulled back into her own driveway, she worried the edge of her lip
with her teeth, a deep frown creasing her forehead. Not falling in love with
him might prove to be a lot harder than she'd an cipated.

But Elena Gilbert was a very determined woman. And it's not like there
was any choice in the ma er. She'd just have to make sure that didn't
happen.

True to his word, Damon walked into Gilbert's Coffee Clutch right on the
dot of six o'clock. Much like the previous Saturday, the place was packed,
the bells above the door making near-constant background music against
the buzz of dozens of conversa ons. A line-up extended back from the
counter all the way to the entrance. Some were op ng for take-out, but
most of the patrons were content to just hang out and socialize.

Damon took one look at the crowd and pushed his way through un l he
joined Elena behind the counter. The moment his jacket was off, he
grabbed a coffee pot and an order pad and headed off to serve the
customers si ng at tables. The grateful smile Elena flashed him was all the
thanks he needed.

They were both sweaty and red by the me the place emp ed out, which
tonight was well a er eleven. Elena picked up a damp cloth wipe down the
tables, but before she could begin he grabbed her hand. "Sit for a few
minutes. We deserve a break before star ng to clean."

"I can't thank you enough, Damon," she told him, slumping onto her stool
behind the counter. "But you really don't have to-"

"Stop. I'm helping you clean up and that's final. If I wasn't here, I'd just be
bored at home. Consider it a favor for keeping me entertained."
She rolled her eyes. "I'd much rather be bored. At the very least we should
be paying you."

He waved her off. "I wouldn't accept it even if you tried. And anyway, it's
hardly like I need the money. But I do need to keep busy."

Bracing her elbows on the counter, Elena looked at him like she was waging
an internal debate. Just as he was about to say "out with it", she sighed.
"So, I have to tell you something. I went over to Ma 's this a ernoon."

Feeling himself tense up, Damon tried to keep his voice casual. "Oh yeah?"

"He, uh…" She fidgeted with one of her bracelets. "He tried to kiss me."

Damon's eyes flared, and he exhaled a hard li le chuckle. "That's not too
surprising."

"It's not like I let him," she clarified. "I pulled away, told him I wasn't into
it."

He was silent for a few moments. Pushing his glasses up on his nose, he
wondered, "Um…why are you telling me this, Elena?"

"I just…wanted you to know. That I wasn't interested. In Ma ."

"I knew that. You've been pre y clear about what you don't want at this
point in your life. Hence our li le arrangement." He paused, mee ng her
eyes. "Unless…have you changed your mind about that?"

Her brows drew in ght. With a small frown, she shook her head. "No. It's
not that. I just-"

"I have an idea," he interrupted. "Not sure if you're going to like it or not,
though."

"What's that?"
"Wellllll…maybe we could show him that you're, you know, off the market
right now? Up the PDA a li le bit when he's around? Just so he gets the
hint. I mean, if you want."

As Elena thought about it, her face brightened. "That's not a bad plan. And
it'd save me from ge ng hit on if people around here thought I had a
boyfriend. But then we'd have to tell everyone that we're, um, da ng. Even
if it's just for show."

A lazy smile stretched Damon's lips. "Well, it's not like it's that much of a
stretch. We are sort of da ng—in a no-strings-a ached kind of way. I
mean, I'd be happy to take you out on dates. If this town had anywhere for
us to really go."

She laughed. "There's a drive-in theatre on Side road 12 off Route 4, but

it's closed at this me of year. Not much doing in the winter except going
to the Grill or hanging out at people's houses."

"I could take you into Roanoke for lunch next Sunday. Go to a movie
a erward, and have you home by dinner. How's that for a real date?"

Elena ba ed her lashes at him. "Are you asking me out, Mr. Salvatore?"

Damon chuckled, standing and pretending to doff an invisible hat and

sweep it in front of him as he bowed theatrically. "If you'll have me, Miss
Gilbert."

Through her giggles she managed to answer, "It'd be my sincerest

pleasure."

Laughing, he resumed his seat. "Are you sure you're cool with telling
people we're a couple? And ac ng like it when we're out and about? I
mean, I know what your priori es are with school and work and stuff. I
don't want to be a distrac on from any of that."

"You help me here at work. You help me with my homework if I need it,
and give me a quiet place to study if I don't. What more could a girl ask for
in a guy?"

Damon got to his feet again. This me he went around behind the counter,
coming close enough to rest his hands on each side of her waist. Leaning
down, his lips almost to hers, he whispered with a smirk, "Don't forget the
orgasms. I think I helped out just a li le bit with those, too."

Heat flooded Elena's en re body. "Oh yes. Those, too," she murmured.

Then, in the spirit of their new arrangement, she li ed her face the scant
two inches between them and kissed him.

"What me is it?" Elena asked sleepily, rolling over in Damon's arms to

reach across to the night stand for her phone. She shot up with a start. "Oh
crap! It's nearly four-thirty! I need to get home and start dinner!"

It had been a lazy Sunday a ernoon. A er church, she'd go en Jeremy to

drop her off at the boarding house on his way back over to the Donovan's.
Damon had read while she studied for an hour and a half, then they'd
spent the remaining me rolling around in his bed. She'd ended up falling
asleep curled up against him, so relaxed she was nearly purring.

Damon's hand ghtened around the bare skin of her hip, pulling her back
to the warmth of his body. "Nearly four-thirty, you said. Nearly. Which
means it's nearly me to get up and get dressed." He sat up and planted a
kiss on her shoulder. "But not quite yet."

Elena sighed, but her lips curved up at the corners. "Much as I wish we
could, there's no way we have me for another ro-"

Her words were cut off by his mouth closing over hers. He ran his fingers
into her hair and dropped back to the pillow, pulling her with him so her
face was above his own. Their kisses were sweet and gentle, with no sense
of urgency to them. Elena loved moments like this; she felt like she could
just go on kissing him for hours. If only they had more me to spare so
they could remain wrapped up in each other's arms indefinitely. But they
didn't.

Reluctantly she pulled away. "I wish I could stay, but I really do have to get
home. I can always call Dad to come pick me up, if you want to sleep for a
while longer."

Damon threw off the blankets and leapt out of bed, bending to retrieve his
discarded boxer-briefs from the floor. "Not a chance. I was planning to help
you cook dinner, not just show up and eat it." He looked up at her in me
to no ce a bemused expression as she dragged on her jeans. "What? I can
cook! I told you the women in my household taught me well when I was
growing up."

"I know. I just…I kinda wanted to show off for you, that's all," Elena
admi ed. "To prove I had at least some valuable life skills."

"Ah. Well in that case, I'm sure there's basketball on that I could watch
with your dad while you slave away for us menfolk." He winked.

"Yeah, Jer isn't missing any of the college games right now. Ten bucks says
they're perched in front of the TV at this very moment, not even aware I'm
not home yet. You can hang with them, and if you find you need a change
of scenery, feel free to come into the kitchen and I'll put you to work
chopping vegetables."

Pulling a blue sweater over his head, Damon looked over at her with a
twinkle in his eyes. "Change of scenery? You clearly haven't no ced my
domes c side. I'd be more than happy to volunteer to be your sous-chef. If
you want my help, I'm all yours."

They pulled up in front of the Gilbert's small white house at 4:45. This me
Damon parked the Jeep in the driveway behind Elena's father's car. As
usual, he came around to open her door for her and help her step out.
Elena wondered if her father might glance out the window and no ce how
gentlemanly Damon always treated his daughter.
As they walked in the door, they were greeted by the sounds of the
basketball game on the television in the adjacent living room. "Told you,"
Elena whispered.

Her dad looked back over his shoulder at them and waved. "Hi guys. Hope
you got all your homework done." He gave his daughter a smile and a wink
before turning his a en on to the man at her side. "Damon, do you follow
college ball?"

"Sure do," he replied with a grin. "What's the score?"

"Duke's up by 9," Jeremy piped up, glancing over at them. "Mar n just
nailed a three-pointer!"

"Cool." Damon touched Elena's elbow, leaning close to her ear. Dropping
his voice, he said, "I'll watch the game with them for a bit, then I'll come
into the kitchen and be your personal slave. Deal?"

Elena smiled and gave him a li le push in the direc on of the couch. His
gaze lingered on her eyes, as did his hand on her arm for a few seconds
before he went to join her family.

A er dumping her knapsack in her bedroom, she washed up and got to

work star ng dinner. She hadn't planned on anything complicated, and
they didn't have any fancy ingredients in the house anyway, so she just
mixed up some ba er for the chicken. Once all the pieces were coated, she
lined them on a baking sheet and put them in the oven.

Next she began peeling carrots and potatoes. Intermi ent cheering from
the other room let her know Duke was s ll ahead. She wondered briefly if
Ma was watching it, too. He hadn't played basketball in high school—he'd
been fully immersed in football and baseball, but, though he was tall, had
never seemed much interested in hoops—but she figured he probably
supported all his school's teams. Thinking of Ma made her recall her
discussion with Damon last night about taking their rela onship public.
Would Damon think she wanted to start immediately, today, in her own
house around her father and brother? What if he was openly affec onate
with her right in front of them? The thought made her tense up. She
wasn't sure she was ready to handle that yet. Just last weekend, she'd once
again assured her dad that they were just friends. Would he think she'd
been lying to him all along?

Just as Elena started to cut up the vegetables, Damon came into the
kitchen. "Did I hear the unmistakable sound of chopping? Sounds like
someone is in need of a sous chef right about now." He came up behind
her, trailing his hand across the small of her back before de ly plucking the
knife from her fingers. With the edge of one hip he nudged her aside and
took over.

She arched an eyebrow at him. "I'm fine, Damon. Go back to the game. I've
got everything under control." Though her words were protes ng, a smile
s ll glowed across her face.

Damon dropped his voice and lted his head toward her. "I already told
your dad I was going to go give you a hand. Don't make me look like a lazy
ass in front of him. Plus, I'm a pre y good chopper. You guys won't even
no ce the li le bits of my fingers in the carrots."

Burs ng out laughing, Elena gave him a smack on the arm that didn't hold
a knife at the end of it. "Fine, you win. Can I at least get you a beer while
you chop?"

"Nah. Your dad already offered."

"Coke?"

"Just water is fine."

She brought him a glass of water, and began to set the table. Every once in
a while, her eyes would dart to his jeans-clad back end as he faced away
from her at the counter. He certainly did have a nice bu . Elena couldn't
help apprecia ng the view.
Once the veggies were set to boil, she started to make the gravy. Damon
stayed and talked to her while she s rred, and before long dinner was
ready.

They all gathered around the small table. It was only big enough for four.
Instead of pu ng Damon in her mother's chair, Elena sat there and set his
spot in her usual place. It just felt less awkward to her that way. Her dad
gave her an odd look when he no ced the change in sea ng, but didn't
men on it.

"So, Damon," Grayson said. "I'm not sure how you're used to doing things,
but in this house we say grace before our Sunday meal."

Damon nodded, flashing an agreeable grin. "No problem. My mom was

always big on giving thanks before meals, too."

"Glad to hear it. She clearly raised you well. In that case, everyone please
bow your heads."

Before Elena dropped her gaze, she shot a quick glance Damon's way. His
eyes were shut, chin down in supplica on, but his cheeks had those high
spots of red again which she was sure hadn't been there a moment ago.
She wondered if the men on of his mother s ll stressed him out a er all
these years. She supposed it probably did; it certainly affected her every
me she thought about her own mom. Maybe that overwhelming rush of
sadness that engulfed her every me she pictured her mother's face was
something that would never really leave her. At least Damon would
understand those feelings. Most people she knew did not.

Dinner was quieter than usual, with everyone trying to be on their best
behavior. The most conversa on came a er Elena asked who won the
game, and since the Blue Devils had trounced the Orangemen in a
spectacular fashion, the guys all agreed their favorable spot in March
Madness was a sure thing.

A er a few moments of silent chewing, Grayson turned to Damon. "So,

what brought you to our li le town in the middle of nowhere to live with
your uncle? I don't recall Elena ever telling me."

Elena glanced at Damon nervously, well aware he didn't like to discuss that
par cular topic.

A few strained seconds passed before he answered. "Bad breakup. Needed

some space to get my head back on straight, and Zach offered."

Grayson nodded, a wry grin appearing. "Ah. Women trouble. I get that."

Jeremy snorted, and his father looked at him in surprise.

"I won't deny it's been a long me, but I did date other girls before I met
your mother, you know."

Holding his hands palm forward in mock-surrender, Jeremy said, "Okay,

okay! I believe you. I don't wanna hear any details."

Everyone chuckled, and Elena shot her brother a grateful look.

Turning back to Damon again, Grayson asked, "So how've you been liking
Mys c Falls so far? Think you might stay for a while? Maybe look for work
here?"

Damon li ed his eyes to hold Elena's. Reaching across the corner of the
table, he put his hand on top of hers and gave her fingers a squeeze. Right
in front of her family. She felt her face heat up and knew she had turned
bright red.

Without shi ing his gaze away from hers, he replied, "It's been so much
be er than I ever expected it to be. Thanks to mee ng your beau ful and
remarkable daughter here, I have every inten on of s cking around."

"Damon…" Elena whispered. She wanted to tell him to please shut up, but
his words were so sweet. She couldn't look away.

The sound of Jeremy clearing his throat brought her back to reality. "Um,
hello?" he exclaimed. "Other people in the room with you two right now."
Damon retrieved his hand, and looked back at her father. "I'm sorry, I just
mean that ge ng to know her and having her friendship has been
absolutely invaluable the past couple months."

Jeremy stood up from the table, grabbing the dirty plates and taking them
to the sink. He had clearly had enough of this par cular conversa on.
Neither the basketball game, nor their dinner guest could take his mind off
the fact that Vickie had s ll not been heard from.

He turned on the water and began to fill the sink to start the dishes. As
Damon stood to go help out, Grayson said, "The two of you come sit down
in the living room with me for a moment, would ya?"

Elena and Damon shot a glance at each other before doing as they'd been
asked. They sat side by side on the couch and her dad took the chair,
angling it toward them.

He looked between the two of them, then held his daughter's eyes. "Elena,
you've been telling me for weeks you two are just friends. But that's a big
fat ole lie now, isn't it?" His voice was so and serious.

Oh crap. She'd been dreading this conversa on. She sucked a sharp breath.
"Daddy, no! It's not like that. When I said we were just friends, I wasn't
lying!"

Grayson frowned. He gaze shi ed between them again. "I don't disapprove
of him, hon. You know I just want you to be happy. But what I won't abide
by is my teenage daughter sneaking around, and lying to me. Tell me the
truth about what's going on between you two."

"Sir…" Damon started.

"We're da ng," Elena cut in. "Now. But we were just friends. Honest. We
always intended to be just friends, even once we realized we were, um,
you know, kinda into one another. On account of me having such a heavy
load of schoolwork right now, and working so many hours at the Clutch.
And of course leaving for college this summer. I didn't want a boyfriend to
distract me."

"Which I totally get," Damon added. "And I had no inten ons of finding
another girlfriend a er the way the last one screwed me over. But-"

"But somehow things changed." She glanced at Damon and smiled.

"Damon doesn't keep me from the important things I need to do—he helps
me out and I get them done faster. And we finally talked about stuff the
other night, and realized we did want more, a er all. So yeah, we're…um…
a couple now, I guess."

Damon reached for her hand and laced his fingers through hers. They
looked at her father together, united.

Grayson's face remained impassive for a long moment. Suddenly he broke

into a wide smile. "Glad to hear it! My baby girl needs all the happiness in
her life she can get. As long as you don't distract her from her educa on, or
break her heart, you two da ng is fine by me."

"I would never hurt her," Damon proclaimed solemnly, giving her hand a
squeeze as his other one came up to rest palm down over his heart. Elena
had to restrain a giggle at his theatrics.

"See that you don't. And on that note, I have some paperwork I need to get
done, so I'm going to re re to my room." Grayson stood, wishing them
goodnight as he le the living room.

Damon and Elena turned to look at each other. She pulled her hand out of
his and rolled her eyes. "Well that was….completely not what I was
expec ng. And weird. And awkward. Although I'm glad he's fine with it. But
my heart was bea ng a mile a minute for a bit there! You're a pre y good
actor. Maybe you have a future in Hollywood someday."

Damon laughed. "Maybe. But I just told him the truth, same as you did. No
ac ng required."
"It was the way you acted though! Holding my hand, looking deep into my
eyes—I think you almost made Jer vomit his dinner back up! So, you know,
good show, I guess. I'm sure Ma and everyone else will buy the whole
thing."

His brows narrowed a frac on. "I'm glad you liked it. And as a good fake
boyfriend should do, I'm going to head home and leave you to finish the
remainder of your English assignment." He stood and walked to the door,
grabbing his jacket from its peg on the coat-stand.

"You can't stay a li le longer? We could watch some TV or something?"

"Nah, I'd be er run. You'll get sick of me if I s ck around. Thanks for

dinner."

She tried to keep her face deliberately relaxed. "Okay. Well, thanks for…
keeping me company all day."

"Goodnight, Elena."

At that, he walked out the door. Without a kiss or even a hug in par ng.
Which disappointed her. Rather a lot. She put her hand on the doorknob to
call him back for a proper goodnight, but then she changed her mind and
let her fingers fall away.

No one was watching. And they weren't in bed. So no kisses or touches

required. Right? Was that the way this was going to be now?

With a sigh, she told herself this was what she wanted, a er all. What she
needed.

Even if some of it kind of sucked.

A/N Thanks to someonestolemyshoes and siberia21 for pre-reading and

proofreading this for me. You guys are the best! Huge thanks to everyone
who has le me reviews! It means so much to me to know your thoughts.
As for those missing the le ers, they will be back, don't worry. Some stuff
has to happen first before JAI will feel the need to write back to Miss LL.
Pre y please review, it won't take you long, and it does help inspire me to
write faster! :)
17. Chapter 17
Chapter 17

The following week went by quickly, with lots of assignments due and
general rushing around as both students and teachers prepared for the
upcoming Spring Break. There was s ll no news about Vickie, and people
around town had grown nega ve as they started to assume the worst.

Ma dropped into the Clutch on Monday night to let Elena know he was
going back to college in the morning. His mom had told him there was
nothing more he could do by staying here with her, and she didn't want
him to miss his final exams. So he was heading back to Durham for now,
but he promised he'd be back if any news turned up about Vickie. Which
hopefully would be sooner rather than later.

Elena replied that she hoped he'd have a good reason to be back soon, and
asked him to text her as soon as they found out anything. He gave her a
hug and wished her well before heading out into the night.

She stared at the door for a few moments a er he'd le . The shop was
empty, her homework was done, and she was feeling a li le lonely with an
hour le to go un l she could close up. She'd really been hoping Damon
would drop by, but a er the way they'd le things the night before, she
wasn't so sure he would. Ironically, their main reason for going public
about their 'rela onship' had just walked out the door, about to leave
town. But it was too late now. A er last night with her father and Jeremy,
they were already out in the open, and unless she told her dad they'd split,
they'd have to stay that way for the me being.

Unless they staged a break-up. The thought sent panicky tendrils twis ng
around Elena's chest. She hoped it wouldn't come to that. At least not
any me soon, although she supposed it was inevitable at some point over
the next five months.
Sighing, she pulled her phone from her knapsack and checked it for new
messages. There were none.

The persistent ra ling of the chain which affixed the punching bag to the
ceiling echoed through his head, drowning out his tumultuous thoughts as
Damon pummeled the crap out of the oblong leather sack.

"You're gonna break that thing right off if you keep that kind of assault up."
His uncle's dry voice interrupted his workout. Damon's fists fell to his sides,
his chest heaving, his t-shirt soaked with sweat as he looked sharply
toward the door.

He reached for his water bo le and downed a few large gulps before
answering. "Just trying to release some…uh…excess energy. Sorry, I'll try to
be more gentle with her." He gave the bag an affec onate swipe as he
smirked at Zach.

His uncle frowned. "Is all this pent-up frustra on s ll about Stefan and your
ex? Or has something else got you all hot under the collar now?"

Elena's face flashed into his mind for a moment, but he shoved the image
away. Everything between them was fine. Things were just the way they
each wanted them to be. So clearly that couldn't be why he felt so damn
edgy all the me lately.

"No idea. I think maybe I'm just ready for Spring to finally show up so I can
get outdoors more."

Zach laughed. "I think we're all feeling that way. Good news on that front
though—it's supposed to warm up again by the weekend. They say we
could hit the high six es."

A genuine smile spread across Damon's face. "Great! I'm taking Elena to
Roanoke for the day on Sunday, so some nice weather would be just the
cket."
His uncle frowned, narrowing his eyes. "Elena Gilbert?"

Oh shit. Damon should have realized the news hadn't spread as far as
Zach's ears yet. If it had, he surely would have known about it. Well,
Grayson seemed to be fine with them da ng, so therefore his uncle would
have to be as well. And if not, Damon would simply tell him the truth—that
they were just friends, but pretending to be a couple to keep Elena's ex
from trying to get back in her pants.

He decided to keep his answer simple and see where the conversa on
went. "Yep."

One of Zach's brows arched. "Isn't she a li le young for you?"

Sighing, Damon said, "If you're wondering if her father is going to storm
over here and raise hell, you can rest easy. He knows. And he's cool with
it." He grabbed his towel and threw it over his shoulders. "And it's nothing
serious. We're mostly just hanging out. No offense, but it's been kind of
nice to have some company in this crappy li le town other than just
yourself."

That earned him a small smile.

"I've been helping her with her homework and stuff. She's leaving for
college this summer anyway, so she's not looking for a serious rela onship
—and you know damn well I'm not, either."

Zach gave him a long look. He opened his mouth as if he were about to say
something, then shut it again. Finally he said, "Just remember what I told
you a few weeks ago. Make sure she knows the score. I'd hate for either of
you to end up ge ng hurt."

"Nothing to worry about," Damon assured him and he brushed past to

head down the hallway toward the main staircase to go up to his room and
shower.
He just hoped that declara on was true, because lately a few nagging li le
whispers of doubt had begun sneaking in.

At eleven-thirty on Sunday morning, Damon pulled up in front the Gilbert's

house. For once the weather forecasters had been right—it was a
beau ful, warm weekend. Sunshine through the windshield warmed the
interior of his Jeep so much he'd tossed his coat in the back. The driver's
side window was down, and the en re outdoors seemed to be wet and
dripping as the snow banks and icicles gave up their stronghold on the
world, finally surrendering to the sun's welcome dominance.

Before he could even walk up the steps to the front door, Elena pulled it
open and greeted him with a wide smile. She was wearing heels and a
black and white floral dress that skimmed the tops of her knees,
presumably s ll in her church ou it. Damon hadn't seen her dressed up
since the evening of the Valen ne's party, when she'd ended the night lip-
locked and straddling him in the backseat of his Jeep. He grinning at the
memory, and felt the crotch of his jeans grow ghter.

"Hey," she said. "Just give me two minutes to change, and I'll be right out."

"Don't."

"Don't what?"

"Don't change," Damon told her, grabbing her wrist and pulling her toward
him so he could greet her with a quick kiss. They were in public, a er all, so
she couldn't very well protest. Not that he thought she would, exactly, but
a er her comments last Sunday night before he'd le , he'd decided once
they were out of Mys c Falls today it might be best to just leave that ball in
her court.

Elena looked down at her ou it doub ully. "Aren't I a bit over-dressed for
lunch and a movie?"
He shook his head and smiled. "You look beau ful. And it's warm today, so
just grab a jacket and we can get going. I promise I'll have you back here
before the sun goes down and it gets cold again."

'Okay," she agreed, stepping back inside to retrieve her spring jacket.
Damon heard her dad call to her to have a great day. "Will I be home by
dinner?" she whispered to Damon.

A er he promised she would be, she closed the door and they were on
their way.

They'd barely rounded the corner onto Main Street when Elena turned to
him. "You don't have to do this, you know."

Damon shot a glance her way. "Do what?"

"Drive all the way to Roanoke with me today. Take me to lunch and a movie
and stuff. We could just go back to your place for the a ernoon instead. No
one would need to know we didn't really go."

He snorted. "Is this your not-so-subtle way of telling me you'd rather spend
the day in my bed than out enjoying my company in more public places?"

"No! Well, I mean, that would be a great alterna ve. But I just meant you
could save the cost of gas and entertainment if you wanted. We could tell
everyone we had a fun a ernoon in the city and leave it at that."

With a small frown, Damon said, "My uncle would probably no ce you
being in my bedroom all day instead of where I told him we were going."
They drove past the Clutch and turned right onto Route 4. "I can't believe
I'm saying this, but…I don't want to spend all day in bed—I want to take
you out on a real date. I've been looking forward to this all week. And
money's not really an issue for me, in case you haven't already no ced. So
would s cking with the original plan s ll be okay with you?"

He flicked his eyes toward Elena again and saw she was staring at him with
what looked like surprise.
"Okay."

"Okay, you're se ling? Or okay, you actually want to do this?

She smiled. "I've never done anything like this before in my life, never had
a guy want to take me out to anything more than a burger at the Grill. So
yeah, if you're really up for it, let's do it."

"Okay," Damon chuckled, shaking his head in amazement. "Teenage boys in

this town are clearly idiots. Be prepared to have an awesome day. And if
my ming is good, maybe I'll be able to get us back to town with an hour or
so to spare. So, we can s ll go to my place for a bit, if you're not sick of me
by then." He flashed her a smirk.

With a genuine laugh that made his heart clench in ways he hadn't felt in
what seemed like a very long me, she readily agreed.

The drive to Roanoke took nearly an hour. When she wasn't admiring the
scenery, Elena kept changing the sta on on his radio, fiddling with the
tunes, and popping CDs in and out un l Damon felt like he might lose his
mind if she didn't let at least one song play all the way through.

They followed the line of the Blue Ridge Mountains, which some mes
regressed into the distance, and some mes were so close that the highway
had been blasted right through the rock, and cliffs of broken-edged strata
bracketed the road. The Jeep crested a rise, and then they began the
descent into the sprawling Roanoke Valley. The en re city laid spread out
before them; the sun reflected off the winding Roanoke River, turning it to
a long metallic snake that twisted its way through the fields before
disappearing between buildings and reappearing, thinner, off in the
distance. Large patches of green spread down the slopes of the valley
where the snow had melted away, but the mountaintops were white and
cold as ever.

Elena was singing along to some dance track he'd never heard before when
Damon at last pulled off onto a side-road and came into the small city. He
had only been to Roanoke a few mes in the past, but it was easy enough
to follow the signs that pointed the way to the downtown.

"So what do you feel like for lunch?" he asked. "There's lots of choices
along this street."

Her eyes were wide as she gazed out the window at the various places they
drove past. With a small shrug, she said, "It's up to you."

Damon glanced over at her and sighed so ly. He kept forge ng she'd
rarely been out of Mys c Falls. Nosing the Jeep into an empty parking spot
along the side, he said, "How about we just get out and stretch our legs
and see what we can find?"

They strolled along the sidewalk for a while, looking at the shops and just
enjoying the sunshine. He was tempted to reach for Elena's hand, but kept
talking himself out of it, convincing himself that there was no one around
she would want him to 'put on a show' for. Then he remembered that
she'd never had a guy take her out and treat her right before. She was
sweet and honest and worked hard, always trying to be everything to
everyone. It seemed to him that, other than her schoolwork, she put her
own needs pre y low on her personal priority list. They might only have a
temporary no-strings-a ached kind of rela onship, but dammit this was a
girl who deserved to know what it was like to be spoiled

So Damon took a chance and grasped her hand, lacing his fingers through
hers as they walked. She looked up at him, a surprised expression flying
across her face for a brief moment, and he worried she was going to make
some excuse and pull away. But she didn't. She just flashed him that cute
li le smile he adored and turned back to checking out the stores as they
passed.

"How about here?" he suggested, gesturing with his free hand toward a
narrow, brightly-painted Mexican restaurant that was sandwiched between
an an que shop and an ice cream parlor.
Elena stopped and examined the menu posted to the door. A small frown
creased her forehead. "I've never had real Mexican food before. Just
nachos from the Grill and tacos my mom used to make some mes."

"Well then it's se led," Damon told her, pulling open the lime green door.
"C'mon."

The interior, too, was decorated in garish, yet cheerfully wild colors. He
pulled out a yellow chair for her at a bright red table right by the front
window so they could have a view of the passers-by on the sidewalk as
they ate.

Elena wasn't sure what to get, so Damon took the liberty of ordering
chicken fajitas for both of them. He thought she'd enjoy how the chicken
would arrive on a sizzling pla er, and she could choose her own toppings
as she saw fit.

A er the waitress le , she raised her eyes to him and flashed that shy li le
smile again.

"What?" he asked.

"I just want to thank you."

Damon was confused. "For what?"

"For taking me out today. You really didn't have to…"

"I wanted to. Elena, I need you to do me a favor today, please."

Her brows furrowed. "What's that?"

"I want you to stop thanking me. Stop feeling guilty, or like you're taking
advantage of me somehow. I wouldn't have offered, or be here with you
right now if I didn't want to be. It doesn't ma er if we're a real couple," he
paused to make air quotes with his fingers to emphasize the word real, "or
just Friends With Benefits. Face it—I like spending me with you." He
grinned at her, hoping she'd understand how much he meant it.

Thankfully she smiled back, a li le wider this me, but equally as shy. His
heart did that weird double-thump against his chest again the moment he
saw it.

"I like spending me with you, too. In case you haven't already no ced,"
she confessed quietly.

"Good. So is it okay if we just relax and have fun today? No more worrying?
Deal?"

"Deal."

Just then the waitress came back over with their drinks and homemade
salsa and chips. Elena's eyes lit up the moment she tasted the fresh
tomato, onion and cilantro dip. "Mmm, that's really good!"

Damon agreed. Then he began to tell her about an authen c Mexican

place he used to frequent in Richmond before it closed up a few years
back. Before long their food arrived. Happily, it lived up to his expecta ons.
Elena emp ed her plate and was soon groaning as she rubbed her
distended tummy.

"I'm stuffed! And now I'll have to walk around with a food baby belly all
a ernoon!"

He burst out laughing. "I'm sure I'll have a matching one. We'll just have to
pretend like we're expec ng twins!"

At that, Elena's higher pitched giggles filled his ears and strange sensa on
spread over him. Had Katherine's laughter ever made his chest ghten at
the same me as his en re body felt lighter, freer, like that? A few weeks
ago he was pre y sure his answer would have been yes. But now, he
honestly couldn't really remember.
They scrolled through a list of movie op ons on Damon's phone, finally
se ling on a screwball comedy. A er he looked up direc ons to the
theater, they walked back to the Jeep and made their way over. It was in a
strip mall close to the Roanoke River, and to the right there was a wooded
park with benches, a playground, and trails along the water. As they had
about forty-five minutes to kill before the movie, they decided to go for a
walk.

Damon took Elena's hand again, and she smiled to herself as he

intertwined their fingers once more. She was surprised by how natural
holding hands with him was beginning to feel.

A red-tailed hawk swooped low over the water before soaring up and
perching on a high branch on the far bank of the river, and she pointed it
out to him. As they con nued further along the path, she grew quiet.

"Penny for your thoughts? Well, with infla on it's probably more like a
buck these days."

Elena looked up at him. "I was just thinking about my mom. She went to
college here in Roanoke."

"Really? What did she study?"

"She majored in English Lit, with a minor in Crea ve Wri ng. She actually
got offered a job to work at the college a er she graduated, but she turned
it down to return to Mys c Falls and marry my dad."

"Huh. So did she ever do anything with her degree?"

"Not really. She stayed home with us when we were small, then worked in
the mayor's office once we were old enough to come home from school to
an empty house. But that only lasted for a few years before she got sick."

Damon frowned. "It's okay. You don't have to talk about it if you don't want
to."
Elena dropped his hand and turned her back to him, quiet for a few
moments. "It's been two years. I'd thought it would be star ng to get
easier by now." She wiped away the moisture that had risen to the corners
of her eyes. "Does it ever get any easier, Damon?"

With a sigh, he li ed both hands to her shoulders and rubbed them.

"Honestly? Not really. It's been ten years since my mom passed away, and
not a day goes by that I don't s ll miss her."

Elena spun around and wrapped her arms around him, res ng her cheek
against his shoulder. He held her in silence, stroking her back. She vowed
to herself that she would not full-on cry, and a er a while realized she
would succeed. "Thanks," she whispered.

"Welcome." She felt his lips touch the top of her head.

They started to walk again. At first they strolled in companionable silence,

just taking in the scenery. Elena took comfort in his hand in hers. It felt nice
to have someone to walk hand in hand with, grown up almost.

Just as she was about to ask him how much me they had before they
needed to turn around, he broke the quiet.

"I told you my mom died when I was twelve, right?"

"Yes," Elena confirmed. He hadn't told her anything else about it, and she
hadn't asked, aware of how uncomfortable that subject always was for
herself. She also hadn't known him very well when he'd men oned it. But
they definitely knew each other much be er now.

Taking a deep breath, he said, "She had asthma. It was the end of May, and
unseasonably humid that year. She'd been having a bad few weeks, and
her puffer was almost empty. My brother was home sick that day, so she
couldn't leave him to go fill her prescrip on herself."

Damon stopped and looked down at Elena. His face was drawn and ght.
"She asked me to stop at the pharmacy and pick it up for her on my way
home from school."

Elena's eyes widened. "Oh crap. Did you forget?"

He shook his head, a bi er smile surfacing. "When I le the school I

remembered. But…" He paused, sighing. "I was a scrawny li le bugger back
then. Thick glasses, and always had my nose buried in a book. I was a
prime target for the bullies—they'd o en follow me home, chase me, beat
on me."

She frowned, squeezing his fingers as she waited for him to con nue. She
had trouble picturing Damon as a skinny, nerdy, vulnerable li le kid.

"Because I needed to go the pharmacy, I took a different route that day,

and at first I thought I'd managed to avoid them. But I was wrong. Once
they saw me, they chased me for blocks. Luckily I was faster, and I
managed to sneak down a grimy alleyway and hide. I had to wait them out
for a long me before they finally gave up and le . A erward, I was pre y
freaked out, and I forgot all about the inhaler. And by the me I got back
home…" He trailed off. Elena heard the hitch in his voice and realized what
he'd come home to.

"Oh God, Damon. I'm so sorry."

He didn't reply. He was no longer looking at her; his eyes were directed
across the river, but they had an empty look to them. She knew it wasn't
the riverbank he was seeing.

"It was all my fault," he whispered to the reeds.

"No." Elena moved in front of him and took his other hand so she was
holding both of them in hers. She forced him to meet her gaze. "It was not
your fault. You were just a kid! And those bullies…if you're going to blame
anyone, blame them!"

Instead of replying, he pulled her against him again, holding her close and
burying his face in her hair. He didn't say a word, but she understood he
would always blame himself no ma er what she or anyone else insisted to
him. Some things could never be washed away, no ma er how much me
or distance you scrubbed at them with.

For few minutes they just stood on the path, holding onto each other,
suppor ng each other. Then he pulled back and gave her a small smile.
"Time to head back, or we'll miss the beginning of the movie."

Damon seemed to come back to his previous cheerful self as they made
their way back and went inside the theater. True to its promise, the film
was actually quite funny, and they both found themselves laughing
throughout most of it. Once their popcorn was finished, he reached over
and laced his fingers through hers again.

By the me they were back on the highway headed home, their former
melancholy had ebbed away completely. Damon popped in a CD of a band
called Spoon, and their upbeat guitar sounds filled the Jeep. Elena had
never heard of them before, but she liked them.

They talked about music, and her next English assignment, and before long
they were exi ng onto the off-ramp that led them to Route 4 and Mys c
Falls.

"Do you want to go straight home or…?" he asked, smiling as he raised a

brow her way.

Elena felt her cheeks flush. "I think we have me to stop by your place for a
bit. If you s ll want to."

"Of course I want to. I'm a red-blooded man in the company of a beau ful
young woman. I'd have to be crazy not to want to."

They both laughed, and instead of con nuing down the road that would
take them toward Main Street and downtown, Damon took the turn off
that led to his uncle's boarding house, whistling along to the song on the
stereo as he drove.
Two hours later, Damon was once again making his way down the boarding
house's long driveway a er having just dropped Elena off at home. He'd
declined her offer to come in for Sunday dinner for a second week in a row,
not wan ng push his luck and possibly make her sick of him. And frankly he
wasn't sure he felt up to pu ng on a 'show' in front of her family tonight,
as she referred to it. It's not that it was difficult to be affec onate with her
around others—it wasn't. Far from it. In fact, it was becoming way too
easy. But something about the way she referred to it as his 'ac ng' made
him uncomfortable. Because, truth be told, he wasn't ac ng at all. He was
just doing what felt natural. She was easy to be affec onate with, to want
to touch, to want to kiss. To want to do the things they had done in his bed
earlier. Which was a li le disconcer ng. If he actually let himself fall for this
girl, it was guaranteed to not end well. And he didn't know if he could
handle a second broken heart. A er the last me, the thought of going
through all that again—well, he wasn't sure he would survive it.

Damon pulled around the bend and came in sight of the big house. And hit
the brakes. An unmistakable bright red Porsche Boxster was parked in front
of the garage. Stefan's car.

Shit.

A/N Sorry for the cliffie! Hope you enjoyed this chapter and the closer bond
that's forming between these two. Thank you SO much for all your kind
reviews! Extra thanks to someonestolemyshoes for pre-reading this
chapter. You guys should go read her awesome fic "Word is a Four Le er
Word". Pre y please review and let me know your thoughts?
18. Chapter 18
Chapter 18

Four Months Ago

"Hi Damon," Mary, his dad's buxom blonde secretary greets him as he
steps off the elevator and into the offices of Salvatore and Saltzman, LLP.
"Please have a seat. Your father will be ready to see you in just a few
minutes. Can I get you a coffee while you wait?"

"No, I'm good. Thanks." Damon flops down onto one of the so leather-
upholstered chairs. The room is decorated in cool blacks, whites, and grays,
with stainless steel accents. A visitor's eye can't help but be drawn to the
only colors—they pop out of a large Jackson Pollock on the wall behind the
recep onist's desk. He suspects it's probably the real deal, too. A er all, his
dad has a thing for collec ng abstract expressionism. A Newman, a Kline,
and another Pollock all reside in their home, placed in strategic and highly
visible posi ons of honor.

Picking up the latest copy of Time from the table, he leafs through it idly,
wondering why he's been called to his dad's downtown office to meet
instead of just speaking to him on the phone or at home. Something is
clearly up. But what? He shrugs mentally. Probably just another lecture—
he'd had enough of them over the years.

He cools his heels in the recep on area for another ten minutes before
Mary tells him he can go inside. Straightening his glasses, he opens his
father's office door.

Giuseppe Salvatore nods, but does not get up from his chair when Damon
enters. He is impeccable dressed in a charcoal gray bespoke three-piece
suit. A blood-red e is the only color he wears, and it demands a en on.
He demands a en on; it's in his very presence—the straight rod of his
spine, his flashing dark eyes, the deep, commanding voice that makes
everyone around him feel an inescapable need to just stop what they're
doing and listen.

"Damon," he greets his oldest son evenly.

Damon is very used to that tone. He removes his jacket and takes a seat
across from the large black desk, crossing one leg over his knee as he
flashes his most relaxed smile. "Giuseppe. What can I do for you today?"

His dad tents his fingers below his chin, staring at Damon over the ps. He
is silent for a few long seconds. At last he begins to speak.

"I'm a pa ent man, as you're well aware…"

Damon snorts so ly, but loud enough to ensure Giuseppe hears. It's the
same li le non-verbal game they always play. He is ignored, as expected.

"You're twenty-two, son. Twenty-two. High school was—what? Five years

ago? And now yet another birthday has slipped past, and s ll you show no
sign of wan ng to pursue any sort of…" Here he pauses, his tongue dar ng
out of the corner of his mouth just a li le, peeking out from between his
thin lips to have a quick taste of the thickening air in the room. "Higher
educa on," he finishes.

With a small sigh, Damon says, "Ah. This again." He rolls his eyes; more
non-verbal sparring. "This was so important you needed to drag me
downtown? We could have just had this same old conversa on at home,
don't you think?" Though he tries to mask it, exaspera on permeates his
words. "I don't want to be a lawyer. I don't know how many more mes I
can say it before you'll understand."

"Yes." His father punctuates that one word with an acknowledging nod.
"I'm aware. But the ques on remains: what do you want to be? Other than
a drain on your trust fund, that is."

Damon gives him a long, contempla ve look. He's trying to decide whether
it's in his best interests to be honest or not. Finally he replies. "Well, I know
it isn't exactly the future you've always envisioned for me, but I've been
thinking lately about teacher's college."

One of Giuseppe's thick eyebrows twitches. It doesn't fly up—he's an

excellent lawyer and very skilled at guarding his emo ons—but it tremors
just enough that Damon no ces. This is not informa on his father is
pleased to hear, not a profession he would wish for his offspring. The name
Salvatore should be a ached to pres ge, like a lawyer, or a surgeon, or a
possibly even a poli cian. Not something so low-brow as teaching.

Damon waits for some verbal reac on to his words, but he gets none. Just
that piercing stare. He hates that stare. It makes him feel like his father is
picking apart his deepest thoughts, looking for the dirty, nasty, hidden
truths so he can use them to his own advantage, just like he does in court.

Giuseppe exhales a small sigh. Barely audible, but of course Damon hears
it. It's an all too familiar sound.

His dad's tented fingers ball into joined fists and drop to his leather desk
blo er. The sudden bang makes Damon jerk in his seat. "It's high me you
made some important decisions about your future, son. As you're fully
aware, your trust fund explicitly states that you need to complete some
sort of pre-approved higher educa on, or I can cut it off any me I see fit.
Since this year is soon drawing to a close, I've decided you have un l next
autumn to enroll in college—at this point, any college—if you expect me to
pay for it, which means you'd need to get your applica ons out this
spring." He pauses, his eyes turning icy. "If not, goodbye trust fund.
Goodbye cushy life. You'll be out on your ass, serving macchiatos at
Starbucks to the kind of hard-working professionals you could have been,
had you had even a single shred of ambi on."

Whether Damon is willing to admit it or not, he has inherited a lot of his

father's temperament. His own face matches Giuseppe's stony expression.
Rising to his feet, he grabs his jacket. "Message received," he mu ers. Then
he heads for the door.
Damon is not in a good mood. Not at all. His dad thinks he's a useless, lazy
ass, nothing but a drain on his pocketbook, a deadbeat who'll never
amount to anything. The most annoying part of all is that Damon isn't so
sure he's not right.

At the moment, all he wants is a s ff drink and Katherine. He needs to look

into her flashing brown eyes, smell the rich scent of her so skin, feel her
soothing caress. Needs it nearly more than air right now. Only she can ease
his frustra ons—she always does.

He drives home too fast, taking the slushy corners with screeching res,
blas ng past shocked pedestrians carrying brightly-colored shopping bags.
Normally he's a much less reckless driver, but today he can think of nothing
more than ge ng home. To her.

Although he s ll lives in his father's house, Giuseppe is rarely there and

Stefan is off in Charlo esville at law school. His brother comes home most
weekends, but during the week Damon usually has the place to himself.
While Katherine doesn't officially live with him, she might as well. She
sleeps in his bed almost every night, has clothes hanging in his closet, a
toothbrush by the sink, a box of tampons in his bathroom cupboard. It's
the first me Damon's ever lived with a woman, and he loves being able to
go out and s ll find her there wai ng for him when he comes back. He
loves waking up in the morning beside her, nuzzling his face into the exo c
perfume of her hair right where it meets that sensi ve spot behind her ear.
He even loves cleaning up all the escaped strands of that long dark hair
that end up in his tub and on his floor. Because it's just more proof that she
is with him, that's she's chosen him. When he's with Katherine, he knows
he's the luckiest man alive. For some inexplicable reason she says she loves
him. And he is just over the goddamn moon about her.

So much so, in fact, that some days he has to just stop and force himself to
take a breath, suddenly overwhelmed by how happy he is, how happy she
makes him. He's never felt that way about anyone before. He thinks he'd
give her the en re world if she asked.
These thoughts make the stress from the conversa on with his dad begin
to ebb away, like steam rising nearly invisible above a fresh cup of dark
roast coffee, all the goodness s ll wai ng below in the depths to coat his
tongue.

As he turns onto his own street, now slowed to just over the speed limit,
he takes one hand off the wheel and reaches into his jacket to finger the
small box hiding in the pocket. A smile creases his lips as he envisions
what's inside.

He'd been impulsive, he knows it. It's not like they've ever talked about
marriage or anything. They're both far too young for that. But…he'd been
walking past a jewelry store a few weeks ago and seen a ring in the window
that he'd just known she'd adore. And an image of her wearing that
sparkling diamond on the fourth finger of her le hand to proclaim to
everyone she meets that she will be his wife someday had popped into his
head. So he'd just…taken a leap. He'd gone inside and bought it.

Damon has been carrying it around inside his jacket ever since, wai ng for
the right moment. And now he has a gut feeling tonight is it. He's not going
to wait for Christmas, or New Year's, or her birthday; he's going to do it as
soon as he sees her. He can't wait any longer to see the expression on
Katherine's face when he drops to one knee and offers her the li le blue
box.

His heart pounds with excitement as he pulls to a stop in front of the triple
garage. His father's ul matum now gone from his mind, he comes in the
front door with a smile, leaps up the stairs two at a me, intending to turn
right and head straight to his bedroom in the east wing.

As he reaches the top of the steps, Damon is surprised to hear voices

coming from the other side of the house. Curious, he changes direc on,
treading so ly on the plush carpet, moving in silence down the hall.

Following the sounds, he turns a corner and realizes the voices are coming
from behind his brother's bedroom door. He frowns. Stefan didn't tell him
he was coming home a day early. And, more importantly, is that a girl he
hears in there with him?

Damon swells with pride at the thought. To the best of his knowledge,
Stefan hasn't had a girlfriend since high school. The last one was more than
two years ago at least. He's been hoping his brother would meet someone
at law school, but Stefan con nually tells him he isn't looking, that he
prefers to focus all his mental energy on his studies. Their father, of course,
insists he's making a smart decision by avoiding unnecessary distrac ons.

But now… Damon moves a li le closer to the door. Stefan is definitely not
alone. He begins to back away, to give them their privacy.

A lush laugh reaches his ears, all full of throaty amusement. It's a laugh he
knows all too well.

He goes numb.

His body parts seem to have minds of their own, because his stunned brain
surely didn't tell his hand to twist open the door, didn't command his feet
to enter his brother's bedroom.

The sight his eyes are met with will be emblazoned across his mind forever.

Katherine.

And Stefan.

Naked.

His voice doesn't seem to be working any be er than his brain, because
although his mouth falls open, no words come out. His throat is bone dry.
He can hardly breathe. S ll as a statue, he gapes at them, entwined on
Stefan's queen-sized bed.

Stefan is the first to no ce. Katherine is straddling him, and he grabs her
hair—she does tend to like it rough—and sits up. When he sees his brother
standing in the doorway, his eyes bulge. His jaw drops. One word comes
out, one single strangled word and it puts a stop to everything. Everything.

"Damon?"

Katherine whips around, her long hair flying out like a fan, her eyes also
flared in shock. She grabs the blanket and covers herself, but wisely keeps
her mouth shut.

All three of them stare at each other in stunned silence. For what feels like
a long me no one moves. The room is so quiet. Dead quiet. The lack of
sound stretches out so far and so long it's nearly deafening.

Stefan looks like he's about to try to speak again, and seeing his brother's
face contort in distress like that is the catalyst Damon needs. He spins
around and leaves, slamming the bedroom door shut behind him and
nearly running down the hall.

At the top of the stairs, his des na on his car and God knows where a er
that, just as long as it's got an empty bo le at the end of it, he forces
himself to stop in his tracks. Yes, he needs to get away from them. But
Damon Salvatore not a coward. And this is his home. He's not just going to
flee. There will be a bo le in his near future, but it's going to be emp ed in
his own room, not in some seedy bar. Not tonight, anyway.

So he keeps walking. Once inside his bedroom, he locks his door and pulls a
cardboard box from the floor of his closet, upending it. Old clothes he was
planning to give to Goodwill land in a heap, one sneaker rolling into a
corner. He doesn't even no ce.

Damon rips Katherine's clothing from its hangers, tossing it all

unceremoniously into the now empty box. He rifles through every drawer,
looks under his bed, pulls items from the bathroom cabinet un l
everything of hers is removed.

Just as he's folding the flaps of the box closed, he hears footsteps
approaching his door. There's a pause, then a so knock. He ignores it.
"Damon?" Stefan says his name in a voice choked with remorse. "I know
you're in there. And I know you don't wanna talk to me right now, but
would you please just-"

He cuts off his brother's planned speech or apology or groveling or

whatever the fuck it was going to turn into by opening the door. A relieved
smile starts to rearrange Stefan's frown, but Damon just shoves the box
into his arms.

"Guess she's your problem now."

Then he shuts—shuts, not slams, although it takes all of his willpower not
to—the door firmly in his brother's stunned face.

That's the last me Damon opens his bedroom door for three en re days.
No amount of pleading, or crying, or yelling from the other side has any
effect on him. He drinks a lot, sleeps a li le, stumbles to the bathroom to
vomit from me to me, but he doesn't talk. He shuts his phone off, but
not before dele ng more than fi y photos. He's not hungry, although his
stomach is definitely not impressed with the lack of respect he's been
showing it. It rumbles almost constantly.

At one point Stefan tells him through the door that Katherine has le . She
didn't come to grovel for forgiveness through the wood like his brother has
done over and over, but then again, he didn't really think she would. It's
not in Katherine's nature to grovel.

Stefan also says that he never meant for any of this to happen, but that it's
been going on for a while now. He says he's in love with Katherine and she
with him, and that he's sorry, so, so very sorry for all the pain he's caused.

Damon, of course, does not respond.

On the third day, his father's fist ra les the door and Giuseppe's resonant
voice commands his son to stop being such a goddamn girl and grow a pair.
Then, almost as an a erthought, he casually men ons that Uncle Zach
wants him to call.

Damon thinks on that a while. His uncle lives more than two hours away, in
a small town lost somewhere in the foothills of the Blue Ridge Mountains.
Damon and Stefan visited once with their father quite a few years ago. He
doesn't really remember all that much about Mys c Falls. It's pre y much
a blink and you'll miss it kind of place.

With a sigh, he turns his phone back on. Twelve voice-mail messages,
fi een texts, twenty-four e-mails, nine tweets, and five new Facebook
messages await him. He'd lay odds that the majority of those are from his
brother. And that none are from Katherine. But he doesn't bother to check;
he scrolls through his address book un l he finds Zach's number and, with
a glimmer of curiosity if nothing else, calls him.

"Hello?" Zack answers a er the fi h ring, sounding somewhat breathless.

Damon recalls how large and rambling the former boarding house in which
his uncle now resides is, and wonders if he had to run for the phone.

"It's me." His voice is somewhat hoarse from disuse, and he hopes Zach
will recognize it.

"Oh, Damon! Thanks for calling. I wasn't sure if you would." He pauses, to
catch his breath presumably. "You father told me what happened, at least
his interpreta on of it, as I'm sure you've guessed."

"I had."

"I'm not gonna try to make you talk about it or anything, I swear. I know
you just want your space right now. That's actually why I'm calling." Zach
pauses again, and Damon is even more curious about where this is going.
He's startled by his uncle's next words.

"I'd like you to consider coming here and staying with me for a while. A few
days, a few weeks, a few months—whatever you need."
"I don't know," Damon starts, but his uncle doesn't let him finish.

"Look, Damon. Not sure if you remember, but when I moved out here, I
was pre y messed up, myself. I know be er than most people that
some mes you just need to get away from your problems for a while, to
get some me and distance to get your head screwed back on straight.
That's what I'm offering. Time and distance. Plus, I know I'd like having
some company. You're welcome here, if you want."

A ght lump has formed in Damon's throat. He's unable to respond.

"Just…at least say you'll think about it," Zach pleads.

Finding his voice at last, Damon mu ers, "I'll, uh, I'll let you know." He
disconnects, falling heavily back onto his pillow. The house around him is
silent and empty feeling; the only noise he detects is the furnace blowing
warm air through the vents. It's funny how some mes you just know you
are alone.

Tomorrow is Christmas. Not so many days ago, he'd assumed it would be

his happiest Christmas since his mom passed away, as he'd be spending it
with the woman he loved—his fiancée—at his side. Now all that has been
blown to fucking smithereens. Maybe his father and brother will s ll end
up spending the day with her, but this year Damon will not be joining
them.

And just like that, a decision is made. He gets to his feet and hauls his
suitcase from the upper shelf in his closet and begins to pack. Once it's full,
he loads a large duffle bag as well.

The li le blue box that's been hidden inside his jacket for nearly two weeks
is le on his bedside table. They'll probably find it and surmise its intent,
but so what if they do? It makes not a single shred of difference now. And
Damon no longer gives a fuck what any of them think.

Unlocking his bedroom door at last, he steps tenta vely out in the hallway,
listening carefully for any sign of life in the large house around him. As
expected, there is none.

He goes downstairs, but stops in front of the large oak double doors.
Se ng down his bags, he frowns and makes a spontaneous detour into the
si ng room. His mother's photo sits on the mantel over the fireplace, as it
has for the past ten years. Damon picks it up and examines it though ully.

She was too young. That lump rises in his throat again as he takes in her
dark hair and expressive blue eyes so much like his own. Her cheekbones
are high, and a li le drawn. Her skin is pale, and she looks a bit unwell. But
then again, she o en did in the last few years before she passed. She looks
a lot like how he remembers her the last me he saw her.

All at once he's that twelve year-old boy again, standing in the front
hallway looking up at her smiling face. He feels her dry lips on his forehead
as she kisses him goodbye, her hand on his shoulder as she guides him out
the door on his way to school. His eyes, which have so far remained
miraculously dry throughout this whole hellish ordeal, itch at the corners,
and his throat grows ghter s ll.

Not caring in the least what his father will say, Damon takes the photo with
him.

He doesn't head straight to Mys c Falls. Much as he cares about his uncle
and doesn't want to worry him, he is nowhere near in the right headspace
to spend Christmas with anyone he knows right now.

Instead, he drives to a cheap-ass motel on the west side of Richmond and

checks in. There is a shabby roadhouse across the way, and he has every
inten on of drowning all those clawing demons in his head away with
whiskey. Or bourbon. Or vodka. Or rubbing alcohol, if he has to.

On Christmas Day, Damon wakes up with worn thin motel sheets twisted
around his legs, a bulldozer of a hangover working its level best at caving in
his skull, and what feels like month-old dead skunk trying to claw its way
out of his belly via his throat.
A er an unpleasant few minutes bowed down before the porcelain throne,
he rinses out his mouth, brushes his teeth, and has a long, although not
par cularly hot, shower. He braces his hands against the le and just lets
the water drum on his back, wan ng to cleanse himself of not only his sins,
but also his memories.

Of her.

Of them.

Of his own failings.

Of everything.

It doesn't work. And the booze only allows him a temporary reprieve.
There must be some way to scrub off all these unwanted feelings. But he
has no idea how.

Then he remembers his uncle's offer.

Once Damon is dressed in clean clothes, he sits down on the edge of the
bed. The cheap ma ress springs groan as he stretches his hand over to the
nightstand to retrieve his glasses and his phone. His stomach grumbles—or
maybe snarls would be be er way to describe it. He has no idea if he ate
anything at the bar last night. Some peanuts, maybe. Which means he
hasn't eaten a proper meal in four days. No wonder he feels so damn shaky
and weak. Hard liquor does not offer much in the way of useful calories.
So, first he orders delivery from the pizza place down the street. Then he
punches in Zach's number.

When his uncle answers, all he says is, "I'll be there before New Year's."

A/N I hope you liked this Damon flashback, even though it meant there was
no Elena in this chapter. I felt it was necessary at this point in the story to
include it, and fear not, we will pick up where ch 17 le off at the beginning
of ch 19. Thanks to someonestolemyshoes and siberia21 for pre-reading
and giving my their feedback, and thanks to all of you who have taken the
me to leave me reviews. Every one means a LOT to me!

Would you guys mind if I hijack this A/N for a moment for a bit of self-
promo on? Some of you may have read my completed DE AU/AH fanfic
'The Sha ered Mirror'. If you have, you might also know it was always my
inten on to covert it to original fic on and for it to become my first novel.
Well, dear readers, that day has come - TSM is now available on Amazon as
an original novel! It has been a long, some mes terrifying, and more o en
exci ng process. If you're interested in checking it out, the link is on my FF
Profile and you can cut and paste it into a new window. (FF won't allow me
to post a link in here, sorry.)

It's kind of a huge deal to me and I wanted to share with you. Any
ques ons about TSM or my novel, please feel free to PM me. Again, I hope
you liked this flashback to the second worst day of Damon's life (so far,
anyway). More to come soon. Pre y please leave me a review with your
thoughts? You guys are the best! xo
19. Chapter 19
Chapter 19

Damon sat in his Jeep for a few long minutes, clenching and unclenching
his fists as he glared at his brother's conver ble through his windshield.
What the hell was Stefan doing here?

No, scratch that. He knew exactly why the li le shit was here. To give him
those big, green, puppy-dog eyes and grovel for the two-hundredth me.
To try to guilt trip Damon into forgiving him. To try to get his big brother's
permission to con nue to be with her.

Exhaling a long sigh, Damon contemplated his op ons. He could just re-
start the engine and leave, go back into Mys c Falls and grab a drink at the
Grill. If he drank it slow enough, and went for a long, aimless drive
a erward, maybe his brother would be gone when he finally returned.

Oh, who was he kidding? There was no chance in hell Stefan would leave
un l he talked to him. Damon knew him well enough to know that. He was
as stubborn as Damon was, and as their father was, when he really wanted
something. And Stefan really wanted Damon to ease the crippling weight
of his guilty conscience. So unless Damon was prepared to high-tail it out
of town for good—which he most definitely wasn't yet—he was just going
to have to go inside and deal with his brother face-to-face.

Shit. So not what he needed right now. All he wanted was to go upstairs to
his room, put on some music, lie across his bed (which probably s ll
smelled like Elena—a thought that made the hard line of his mouth twist
into a grin) and take some me to mull over the events of the day. Since
that obviously wasn't about to happen any me soon, at least not un l he
faced Stefan, Damon reached for the door handle. His boots crunched on
the gravel today's welcome sunshine had exposed as he stepped onto the
driveway.
When he came into the front hall and shut the heavy door behind him, he
heard the voices of Zach and Stefan coming from the drawing room. His
eyes rolled briefly to the ceiling, thanking Fate or whatever higher power
there was that Katherine didn't seem to have tagged along. Not that he'd
thought she ever would. But s ll. Small blessings.

They obviously heard him come in, because within seconds their
conversa on came to an abrupt halt. A moment later, his uncle appeared
in the wide archway, a concerned expression on his face. "Your brother's
here," he told Damon in a low voice.

Damon flashed a sardonic grin. "I no ced. Thanks."

"You want me to stay? Or leave you two to hash things out? Peacefully," he
stressed.

Shoulders drawn and tense, Damon tried to force his keyed-up body to
relax. "I'm good," he mu ered. "This won't take long." He pushed past
Zach and stepped into the adjacent room.

Stefan sat in one of the high-backed wing chairs close to the fireplace. His
elbows were propped on his knees, fingers laced into a fist below his chin
as he stared morosely into the flames. He glanced over quickly when he
heard Damon come in.

"Damon," he said. Stefan's voice was small, young-sounding. It reminded

Damon of when they were kids and Stefan had done something bad, and
had come to his big brother for help fixing things, so terrified he always
was of their father finding out.

"Stefan," Damon replied tersely, moving behind the bar along the side wall
to pour himself a double shot of bourbon. He li ed the lowball and lted it
so the amber liquid within sloshed in his brother's direc on. "Liba on?"

Stefan's brows bounced up, then resumed their usual frown. He shook his
head. "I'm good, thanks."
Taking a deep swig, Damon came around and perched on the arm of the
burgundy leather couch. "What can I do for you, then?"

"I just…" Stefan stopped, sighing. "I had to…" Another sigh.

"Spit it out, brother. I haven't got all night. Bo les to empty, beau ful
young things to seduce—you know how busy my schedule is these days."

Was that a hint of a grin Damon saw flu er at the edges of Stefan's ght
lips?

"You're actually going to let me talk this me? I half-expected you to shove
me out the door the minute you saw me."

With a wry half-smile, Damon raised his glass toward his brother again. "I
won't say it didn't cross my mind. But you drove all this way. The least I can
do is offer you a beverage before you leave."

Long furrows creased Stefan's forehead. "Mighty big 'o ya," he mu ered.

Damon kept talking as if he hadn't heard. "Since you declined, however..."

"Will you just shut up and listen to me? Like really listen?"

Miming closing a zipper across his mouth, Damon regarded his brother
with serious eyes. "So talk."

For a few long moments, Stefan was silent, clearly trying to decide how
best to begin. Damon had assumed he'd been prac cing his speech the
en re drive here, but maybe he was wrong. Or maybe Stefan had decided
to toss the planned apology out the window this me.

"I hate that my ac ons hurt you," he started. "I hate that I allowed that to
happen to you. If I could go back and change some of my choices, I would.
In a heartbeat.

"But I can't. I can't rewind me to fix all this. All I can do is try to make
things right with you, and hope that someday maybe you'll forgive me. I
know you might never be able to. Hell, I'll never forgive myself, either. But
Damon—you're my big brother. And I miss you."

Damon was silent. He was no longer looking at Stefan; he now appeared

entranced by the bourbon swirling at the bo om of the glass he held
res ng on his knee.

He heard Stefan take a deep breath. "This isn't easy for me, you know…"

A harsh laugh issued from Damon, punctuated with an eye role. "It isn't
easy for you? Yeah, right. Because clearly this is all about you."

His brother ignored his outburst and kept going. "It wasn't easy for me to
come out here today, knowing full well it was fruitless, that you'd just push
me away yet again. Knowing you're never going to forgive me, but having
to keep trying anyway, because I just can't seem to stop." His breath
hitched in his throat. "What I did to you was beyond horrible. And you
should hate me for it. I deserve your hate. But I just—"

"I don't hate you."

Stefan's eye flared as he realized Damon was finally looking at him again.
"What?"

Damon sighed and tossed back the last remaining liquid from his glass.
"You heard me. And you're right—I should probably hate you. I wanted to
hate you. Convinced myself I did for a long me, actually. But the truth is…I
don't."

It was Stefan's turn to stare. He seemed to be holding his breath, afraid any
li le movement or sound could sha er this fragile armis ce into a
thousand jagged fragments, each des ned to pierce his heart.

A er a long moment, in a hesitant voice he asked, "Does this mean…?"

Damon flicked his shoulders in a small shrug, then got to his feet and went
back behind the bar to refill his glass. "I don't know what it means. You
sure you don't want that drink?"

Stefan sighed. "Maybe just one."

Reaching for a second lowball, Damon filled it with bourbon to match his
own. Before he could return to the sofa to deliver it, Stefan came over to
stand beside the bar. He picked up the glass and drained it in two huge
gulps. Then he looked his brother right in the eyes. "I'm so sorry, Damon."

"I know you are."

Damon refilled Stefan's drink and they resumed their seats, this me
opposite each other with the heavy an que coffee table between them.
Damon put his legs up on the wood, crossing one foot over his ankle and
leaning back against the smooth leather. "So, how's law school? Top of
your class, I assume?"

Zach popped his head into the cavernous room a few minutes later, and
once he realized his nephews were at least a emp ng to converse like
normal adults instead of about to cause each other physical harm, he
exhaled a relieved sigh and came over to join them.

Damon did his best to relax, and to his surprise he found it wasn't really all
that hard. Though he'd tried to push the thoughts away, he could admit
he'd been curious about how his brother was doing. Not speaking to him
for so long had le a pre y huge hole in his life, and he only just now
realized how much he'd missed their talks.

Stefan avoided the subject of Katherine—and, of course, neither Damon

nor Zach brought it up—right up un l around two in the morning when
Damon was showing him to one of the former guestrooms where he could
sleep for the night. As he wished Stefan goodnight and went to close the
door, his brother stopped him with a ques on.

"Forgive me, but I need to ask." He took a deep breath. "Are you s ll in
love with her?"
Damon's brows shot up. Then his expression so ened, and he flashed
Stefan that same wry grin from before. "Nope."

"Really?"

"Really. And I'm not just saying that because I know it's what you want to
hear. I've given the ma er a lot of thought. Too much, probably. For a long
me, the truth would have been that I s ll did, no ma er how angry I was
with her. But not anymore. The anger is s ll there, but the love, the
desire…it's all just…I don't know. Evaporated. I never would have believed
it could happen, but somehow it has.

"Don't get me wrong, Stef. I don't plan on rushing back into the ole family
fold any me soon. Spending me with the three of you is s ll pre y low on
my list of things I'd like to be doing. But..." He paused to clear the emo on
beginning to ghten his throat. "I just…lame as it probably sounds at this
par cular juncture in our lives, I really do want you to be happy. And if your
happiness lies with her, then…then, well, so be it."

Stefan examined his face, looking, Damon presumed, for some sign that
this statement was fic on, that it was what he wished were true instead of
what actually was.

Then his brother smiled. There was more relief in that smile than Damon
would have ever thought possible. He clapped one hand onto Damon's
shoulder and looked right at him. Stefan's eyes glistened.

"Thank you," he murmured.

For a moment there Damon thought his baby brother was about to pull
him into a hug. He recognized the hesita on in his eyes, the worry that it
was too big a risk, that he'd surely be rejected. Damon knew Stefan
probably be er than anyone, and he could read him all too well in those
seconds. So he made the move himself—he put his arms around a
surprised Stefan and clapped him on the back, once. Then he stepped
away, flashed him a small grin and closed the door.
When he got inside his own bedroom, he opted to skip the music and just
flopped across his bed. But instead of reminiscing about his a ernoon with
Elena—that could, and would, come later—his mind re-played his
conversa on with Stefan.

No, Damon wasn't ready to return to Richmond yet. At some point he

knew he'd have to go back, but it s ll felt like that moment was a long me
in the future right now. And there was his father's ul matum to consider,
too. It was already halfway through March. If he didn't want to kiss his
trust fund goodbye, he needed to get his ass in gear with his college
applica ons. He wondered briefly where Elena had applied. She'd
men oned Duke, but he wasn't sure where else. Then he snorted, shaking
off that thought, chiding himself for the silliness of it. What did her choices
ma er to him? They would no longer be a part of each other's lives by the
me summer was over, if not sooner, so why even contemplate such things
as where she'd be a ending school?

Damon decided he'd get going on his applica ons in the morning. It could
no longer be ignored, and suddenly felt a lot more important than it had
before.

He reached over to turn out the light, but his hand stopped in mid-air
before it could land on the switch. Dropping his fingers to the drawer in the
night table instead, he rummaged around in it un l he found his le ers
from Miss Lonely Love.

Smoothing out her most recent one, he re-read it, thinking again about his
conversa on with Stefan and his recent self-realiza ons.

He stretched an arm back over to the open drawer and retrieved his pad of
paper and a pen. It had been a while, but tonight he felt like wri ng to the
advice columnist once again.

Dear Miss LL,

Sorry it's been so long since my last le er. Life has go en more interes ng
in the mean me, that's for sure. I want to thank you for your kind wishes.
Believe it or not, I think I deserve happiness as well. I'm just not sure how
exactly I'm going to get there.

But! I have come to a couple of pre y important (and surprising)

discoveries about myself recently.

Drum roll, please…

First off, I've realized I'm no longer in love with my ex. I know! It was a
shock to me, too. But the more I think about it, the more I'm sure it's true.
There's nothing in the world that could make me take her back now. So,
that must mean something pre y major about my ability to move past all
this someday, don't you think? There might just be hope for me yet.

Second, and probably more important, I'm considering forgiving my

brother. My anger towards him, while not totally gone or anything, has
lessened. I'm trying my best to understand why he did what he did. Which,
frankly, I s ll don't. But I'm trying. He's my brother, a er all. And the
thought of cu ng him out of my life forever, never speaking to him again,
just seems, I don't know, sort of ridiculous now. He's the only brother I've
got. He's the only one who really understands me in so many ways,
because he was there, growing up alongside me. We went through a lot of
good mes, and a whole lot more ugliness together. And right now he's
bea ng himself up about this enough for both of us. He needs me. So I'm
going to try my best to forgive him for his ro en choices. The truth is I need
to just as much as he needs me to.

So, yeah. Two important evolu ons in my thinking recently, so I wanted to

share with you.

It's not much, but it's something. Baby steps, right?

Have a good one,

JAI
Damon didn't even bother to read it over; he folded it and tucked it into a
blank envelope, scrawling Miss Lonely Love's address across the front. He
figured he'd mail it when he went downtown to visit Elena at the Clutch
tomorrow evening.

Monday morning, Elena slept late. When she jolted awake and no ced the
li le red numbers on her digital clock read nine-fi een, at first she
panicked. Then she smiled, pulling the covers back up over her head as the
realiza on that it was Spring Break and she was not actually late for school
set in.

She hauled herself out of bed thirty minutes later and padded, yawning, to
the kitchen to make some toast. Her dad had already been at the Clutch for
hours, and the faint snores emana ng from Jeremy's bedroom told her she
wouldn't be seeing her brother's face any me soon, either.

Elena texted Bonnie to see what she was doing today, but she was ed up
running errands with her grandmother all a ernoon. She promised she'd
meet Elena at the coffee shop a er dinner for a study session. They both
had irra onally massive piles of homework to get through this week; for
some reason their teachers didn't seem to get the 'break' part of Spring
Break.

By the me it was full dark out, Bonnie was perched on a stool along the
long Formica counter across from Elena. They weren't cha ng much
tonight-both had their heads down, trying their best to make a dent in
some of their studying. Their goal was to get everything finished early so
they'd have the end of the week free to relax and have some fun. Mr. and
Mrs. Clancy were si ng at a table nearby finishing their coffees, but
neither of them minded if Elena did schoolwork in her free moments. The
place was typical Monday-evening quiet, a er all.

Bonnie put down her highlighter with a sigh and looked up at Elena. "Have
they found out anything new about Vickie?"
Elena met her gaze. Worry creased the normally smooth skin between her
eyebrows. "Not that I've heard. I can't stop thinking about where she could
be, Bon. It's hard to focus on reading, because my thoughts keep flicking
back to her." Or to Damon, she added mentally.

The jingling of the bells over the door made Elena glance up, and she
smiled as the very man she'd just been thinking about stepped inside. She
beckoned him over to the empty stool beside Bonnie.

"We were just discussing Vickie," she told Damon as she grabbed a coffee
pot to fill his travel mug.

"Any news?"

"The police s ll haven't been able to track down Mr. Donovan."

Damon frowned. "He isn't online? E-mail or Facebook or Twi er or

something? No one has his phone number?" The girls both shook their
heads. "Nothing? In the age of the Internet? Then he deliberately doesn't
want to be found. Which seems a li le shady, if you ask me."

Elena cleared her throat, dropping her voice so the Clancys wouldn't
overhear. "He, um, apparently lives a pre y free lifestyle, if you know what
I mean. Ma says he moves around a lot, doesn't tend to keep a phone
number for very long. He told me his dad has a weakness for…
pharmaceu cals."

'Ah. Hippy type? Or just a dri er?"

"A li le bit of both, I think."

"So he just up and buggered off on his wife and kids? Class act."

"Yep," Bonnie interjected, rolling her eyes. "Makes my own dad, whom I
only see maybe once a month, look like Father of the Year in comparison."

Damon nodded sympathe cally.

Mr. Clancy shuffled up to the counter to pay and wish Elena goodnight, and
a few minutes later the coffee shop held only the three of them. Bonnie
went back to reviewing her History notes, and Elena started explaining to
Damon her idea for her big English assignment that was due at the end of
term and would comprise forty percent of her grade.

Before she could finish, the bells rang again as the door was thrown open.
Jeremy wore an anxious expression as he hurried toward them.

"What's up?" Elena asked with a frown, coming around from behind the
counter.

"I…I just got a message from her!" he exclaimed. He was nearly breathless,
and she wondered if he'd run all the way from home.

Elena's eyes widened. "Her who? Vickie?" Bonnie and Damon were now
both staring at Jeremy as expectantly as she was.

He nodded, dragging out a chair from one of the tables and dropping
heavily onto it. "She finally replied to me on Facebook. You won't believe
this, but she's out in California with her dad. Says she's okay and not to
worry." He paused, breaking eye contact with Elena and dropping his gaze
down to his fidge ng hands. "She also said she's not coming back."

"Oh my God," Elena exclaimed. She took a seat across from him. "Did you
tell Kelly yet?"

"Nope. Vick asked me not to. Don't worry though—I will. Wanted to let you
know first. They're somewhere in L.A." Jeremy raised his eyes back to his
sister's again, his worry radia ng right through to her. "Mitch Donovan's a
total dopehead, Elena. Won't be long before he gets bored of her tagging
along, and ditches her again. Takes off while she's sleeping, or something.
Maybe even dumps her on some dirty street corner."

He took a deep breath, and then said forcefully, "She needs to come
home."
"I know, Jer. Did you message her back?"

"'Course I did. Doubt she'll reply any me soon, though. Said she lost her
phone. I don't even know how she got on Facebook. Maybe she borrowed
someone's."

"We've got to tell Ma ." Elena rose, hurrying to the counter and retrieving
her laptop. She took it back to the table where Jeremy sat, pulled her
phone from her hoodie pocket and began typing away. "I'm tex ng him to
see if he can come on Skype right now and talk to us," she explained to the
rest of them without looking up.

Damon's brows narrowed at the men oned of the older Donovan, but he
kept silent.

Elena's phone buzzed against the table about a minute later. She snatched
it up. "Okay, he's going online right now." Opening Skype, she clicked on his
name to call him, and then pushed her computer out so the others could
see. Damon came to stand behind her, bracing his hands on the back of
chair. She felt his finger ps brush the top of one shoulder, and glanced up
at him with a small smile.

"You two Skype o en?" he asked her in a low voice, adding a smirk to
assure her he was teasing.

Elena snorted, reaching behind her chair to rub the side of his leg through
his jeans reassuringly. "Barely. I think we did once right a er he le for
school."

With a ping, Ma 's face popped into view on her screen, and she quickly
turned her full a en on back to the laptop. Ma looked red. Elena
couldn't help wondering if he was s ll having difficulty sleeping. Between
exams and his family problems, he was probably pre y stressed out.

"Hey 'Lena," he greeted her.

"Hey Ma . Bonnie, Jeremy and Damon are here, too." Elena shi ed the
laptop's angle around so he could see the others. Her brother and Bonnie
each gave the screen a wave. "We need to talk to you, and thought a group
discussion might be easiest."

"Oh yeah? What's up?"

"I heard from Vickie," Jeremy told him.

Relief flooded Ma 's face and he perked right up. "You did? When? Where
is she? Does Mom know?"

Jeremy explained the Facebook message he'd go en. Elena could've sworn
Ma 's eyes grew wider with every word.

"Do you have any idea how to get in touch with your dad?" she asked him,
although she already knew the answer.

Ma shook his head with a grimace. "Nope. No clue. Last me I spoke to

him was…last spring I think. Right around gradua on. He didn't call to
congratulate me though—he was just fishing around to see if I could send
him money."

"And did you?" Bonnie wondered.

"I had none to spare. And even if I did, I've got no desire to fund his bad
habits."

"Yeah," Jeremy said. "Don't blame ya. Vick told me all about that stuff. Why
the hell would she take off to California to see him without telling anyone,
though? That's the part I don't get."

"Me, neither," Ma agreed. "Look, I'm done the last of my exams this
week. I'm gonna try to scrape up enough for a cket to L.A. If I can, I'm
going out there to find her this weekend." He ran his fingers through his
hair, making tu s of dark blond stand on end comically. "She clearly needs
someone to talk some sense into her."
For the first me Damon spoke. "That's exactly what I was thinking."

Elena twisted her head to look back at him. "What?"

"We should go to L.A. and find her. All of us."

"What are you talking about?" Jeremy was looking at Damon incredulously.
"How the hell would we afford to do that?"

"Don't worry about the cost. I'll cover it. And it's Spring Break, so it's not
like you'll be missing school."

"You can't do that," Elena protested. "And even if you did, my dad would
never let us go. He needs our help here."

"Just listen. We could leave on Friday, home by Sunday night. Ma , is there

any way you could meet us at the airport in Richmond early Friday?"

Ma frowned. "Um, my last exam is on Wednesday, so yeah, I could

probably do that. But why would you pay for us all to go to California? You
barely know us."

Elena turned back to Damon again. "Your inten ons are wonderful, and I
appreciate them, but you know I can't go. Just take Jer and Ma and go
find her."

"Vickie doesn't even know Damon," Jeremy said. "It should just be Ma
and me."

"Elena, I can cover your shi s for you," Bonnie piped up. "Your dad might
let you guys go if Damon and Ma are with you. Since they're older and all.
And he knows he can trust you."

Ma sighed. "I'm in. But I'm paying you back, Damon. And if you're going,
I'd honestly prefer if Elena came, too."

Elena looked doub ully at him, then at each of her friends. "Dad might go
for it," she said slowly. "It wouldn't hurt to at least ask. I s ll don't know,
though. Four round-trip ckets to Los Angeles is a lot of money, Damon."

"I've got nothing else to do with it." He rubbed her shoulders again.

Elena s ll didn't really love the idea of him paying for all of them, but she
could speak with him about that later, once they were alone.

"So you guys talk to Grayson and let me know," Ma told them. "As soon
as I hear back from you, and we've got a plan in place, I'll tell Mom what
we're up to. I'm pre y sure she'll be all for it. She knows I have a way
be er shot at ge ng through to Vickie than some strange cops would."

Elena glanced over at Jeremy. Ma might not realize it, but she'd bet her
brother had as good a chance at convincing Vickie to come home as he did.
Maybe be er.

"Okay, 'night Ma . I'll text you tomorrow as soon as I know what's up."

"Goodnight all. Thanks for the good news, Jer. Talk soon." He winked out of
sight.

Closing her laptop, Elena took it back behind the counter and slid it into
her knapsack. Bonnie joined her and the girls began to pack up their
schoolwork.

"Well, I'm gonna head home," Jeremy announced, pulling his jacket back
on. He turned to Damon. "Thanks, man."

"We'll find her," Damon said.

"Yeah." His expression was more hopeful than Elena had seen it since
Vickie disappeared. The bells rang out his departure, and Bonnie followed
shortly a erward, assuring Elena as she le that she didn't mind covering
her shi s over the upcoming weekend.

Damon returned to the counter and took a sip of his cooling coffee. "It's no
big deal, you know."
"It is to me." Elena paused from rinsing out a carafe and turned to him.

"I know. But my trust fund is just si ng there. And it would be nice to see
some of it go toward something meaningful, for once."

"I wish I could promise I'd pay you back, but…"

"Stop." His voice so ened. "While I do want your friend to return home
safe, I'll admit, I have a minor ulterior mo ve." He came around behind the
counter and put his hands on her waist so he could look into her eyes.
"You've never been out of Virginia. Hell, you've never even seen the ocean.
I want to take you to out to California and spoil you a li le, Elena. Will you
please let me do that?"

Elena couldn't help but smile as she looked up into those mesmerizing blue
eyes. He looked so earnest, and she knew he really meant it. Her heart was
suddenly bea ng too fast. "If my dad says it's okay," she said so ly, "then
yes. I'll come."

Instead of replying, Damon pulled her to him and let her know just how
pleased he was about her agreement by kissing her soundly.

A/N First of all, thank you ALL so much for all the support and good wishes
you've sent to me about my novel. You guys are the actual best! Secondly,
thank you to someonestolemyshoes and siberia21 for pre-reading this
chapter and giving me their invaluable feedback. Thirdly, and mostly
importantly, HUGE thanks to those of you who take the me to leave me
reviews. They really mean the world to me and keep me inspired to keep on
wri ng. I hope you enjoyed this chapter, and please take a moment to let
me know your thoughts in the li le box below. Have a great weekend!
20. Chapter 20
Chapter 20

Elena spent Tuesday studying. She was bound and determined to get all
her homework done early so her dad wouldn't be able to use it as an
excuse to not let her go to California. Damon was supposed to meet her at
the coffee shop tonight, and once they got back to her place, they were
going to join forces with Jeremy to talk to their father about the trip idea.

She just hoped that Dad would s ll be up at ten-thirty. He o en went to

bed early, as he had to wake at the crack of dawn to get ready for work. If
he were already in bed, they'd be stuck wai ng un l tomorrow to try to
squeeze in a free moment to talk to him at the Clutch. Which would be
pushing things close, as far as cket buying, hotel reserving, and general
organizing went.

True to his word, Damon showed up around eight o'clock and kept her
company while she worked on her English assignment, cha ng quietly
with her whenever she needed a break. A few customers popped in and
out, but hardly any chose to linger. The night was clear and not par cularly
cold, and the ci zens of Mys c Falls clearly had more important places to
be.

Not that Elena minded. She had too many other things crowding her
thoughts tonight.

Damon was using her laptop to research hotels while she a empted to re-
read a sec on of The Great Gatsby.

"What about this place?' he asked, turning the computer so she could see.

The picture on the screen showed an elegant gray, black, and white palace.
It was a luxury hotel called Shu ers on the Beach. Elena frowned, her eyes
sweeping over the extravagant facade. "It's gorgeous. But it looks crazy
expensive," she replied with a shrug.
Damon snorted. "It's right on the beach, and a short walk from the Santa
Monica Pier. It might be a bit pricey, but it's in an awesome loca on."

"Maybe you'd be er keep looking. I highly doubt Vickie and her dad are
holed up anywhere near there."

"Yeah, probably true. But how cool would staying at that place be? Maybe
next me."

Elena glanced up at him again. Next me? What was he talking about?
There was never going to be a next me, at least not with her. He must
have meant next me he went to Los Angeles with someone else. That
thought made a knot snarl deep in her chest.

Damon resumed clicking away on the keyboard, while she a empted to re-
focus on what she'd been reading. It was difficult to concentrate on Nick,
Gatsby, Daisy and Tom when her thoughts kept being pulled away to far off
coasts.

"Hmm," he mu ered.

Elena glanced over. "Hmm, what?"

"I think I found the perfect place." He met her eyes and flashed a crooked
grin.

"Let me see."

As she reached for her laptop, he quickly clicked the mouse, and when she
was able to see screen, it showed just her desktop background. "Hey!
What were you just hmming at? Why'd you hide it?"

"You'll just have to wait and see, won't you, Miss Nosy?"

"Thought you wanted me to come with you?" she huffed.

"I do. And you will be, once we convince your dad that not only is this li le
adventure for a worthwhile cause, but it will also be a fabulous experience
for his kids to see a li le bit of this great country we live in. At no cost to
him. How can he say no?"

Elena rolled her eyes. "He's more than capable of saying no. We'll find out
soon enough. But you s ll didn't answer me. Why can't I see this perfect
hotel you've found?"

Damon slid off his stool and leaned over the counter, stretching un l he
could plant a quick kiss on her surprised lips. She didn't lean away from
him, but she didn't kiss him back either.

"Because I want to surprise you," he whispered, pulling back barely an inch

from her mouth and staring into her wide eyes.

At that, she couldn't help but smile.

Ten o'clock seemed to take forever to arrive. Elena got so impa ent wai ng
for it that she jumpedup and locked the front door at seven minutes before
the hour. "Close enough," she told Damon, seeing his ques oning
expression as she grabbed her jacket. "Time to go get this over with."

They were quiet on the short drive back to her house, both mentally going
over their impending conversa on with her father. Once Damon had pulled
up along the curb, he turned to her.

"Nervous?"

"Totally. But the more I think about it, the more I think we just might be
able to pull this off."

His face was serious. "I hope so."

"C'mon. We've got to grab Dad before he heads to bed."

When they got inside, they found Grayson and Jeremy si ng in the living
room watching the local news. Andrew Starr, Mys c Fall's most dashing
reporter, was just telling viewers that there was s ll no new informa on on
the disappearance of Vickie Donovan, but that authori es out on the west
coast were trying to locate her father.

"Good ming," Jeremy said, turning to the new arrivals.

"Did you tell him?" Elena asked her brother.

Grayson's eyebrows shot up, and he glanced between his children. "Tell me
what?"

"We have something we need to talk to you about, Dad," Elena said,
tugging Damon by the elbow into the living room. They sat down on the
couch beside Jeremy.

Her father turned to Damon. "Hi Damon. So I take it you're a part of

whatever this is, too?"

With a ght smile, Damon replied, "Yes, sir."

Grayson looked at the three of them, all facing him in a row wearing
matching serious expressions. Chuckling so ly, he said, "Well, which one of
you's gonna start? It's nearing my bed me, y'know."

Elena opened her mouth to speak, but her brother beat her to it.

"I heard from Vickie on Facebook last night, Dad. She's out in L.A. With her
father."

At first, Grayson looked pleased. "Wonderful! Kelly'll be so relieved." Then

his smile fell away and his forehead furrowed. "She tell you when she's
coming home?"

"She says she's not. You know how her dad is. You know he abandoned
them. It's only a ma er of me ' l he gets restless and takes off again."

"I've heard some…unsavory…stories about Mitch, yes." Grayson sighed.

"But no ma er how much you care about your friend, this really isn't any
of our business. It's between Vickie and her father and mother. So I don't
really get what you need from me."

Elena and Damon looked back and forth between the elder and younger
Gilbert. This was Jeremy's fight more than theirs, and they intended to let
him say what he had to say.

"Vick needs to get her, um, herself back home before something bad
happens. She has no one out there but a guy who—from what she's told
me—cares more about finding his next high than his own kids. Sooner or
later he's gonna get red of playing Daddy and abandon her again. She
might not believe it yet, but he will." Jeremy paused and took a deep
breath. "We wanna go out there and find her. And talk her into coming
home with us."

Grayson frowned, again looking at each of them in turn before landing his
gaze back on Jeremy. "First of all, who's we? And secondly, you do know
that's completely out of the ques on, right?" His eyes widened to
emphasize his point. "For a variety of reasons."

"Just hear us out," Elena pleaded.

He turned to her skep cally. "This is police business and Donovan business.
Not Gilbert business. End of discussion."

Jeremy ran his fingers through his hair in frustra on "You don't understand,
Dad! Vick won't listen to cops or her mom. She's stubborn as hell! I'm not
even all that sure she'd listen to Ma , although he wants to come with us.
But I think I could get through to her, if I could just talk to her face to face.
I'd think she might listen to me."

"He's right," Elena said. "Jeremy and Ma are the best chance we've got to
convince her to come home. And Bonnie already agreed to cover my shi s
this weekend if—"

"Hold up—what? This weekend? And why do you need to go? Or Damon
for that ma er?"
Damon cleared his throat. "Mr. Gilbert, I've offered to pay for the trip. Ma
told us he was going to go alone, and we realized we had a be er shot at
ge ng through to Vickie if Jeremy went, too. Ma then said if Jeremy and I
were going, he'd be more comfortable if Elena came along as well. Frankly,
so would I. It's just for three days, and you don't have to worry about the
money. I've got way more than I need, and I want to help out."

Grayson's eyebrows drew in ght. "Ma 's cool with this half-cocked plan?
Is Kelly?"

"He's gonna tell his mom once I let him know if you agree to let us go,"
Elena said. "He's just wai ng for my text. You're welcome to call Kelly
tomorrow and discuss it with her if it'll make you feel be er." She bit her
lip, looking at her father pleadingly. "I know Jer and I have never been on a
trip before, but Damon will be with us, and he's traveled loads. He'll take
good care of us."

Damon reached over and took her hand, silently assuring both Elena and
her father that what she said was true.

"It's not that…" Grayson started.

Elena didn't wait for him to state more arguments against their plan; she
straightened her spine, narrowed her eyes, and said, "You trust me, right? I
think I've proven myself responsible. I'm sure between the four of us we
can keep tabs on each other and stay out of trouble."

Her dad's ght lips finally curled into a small smile. "That's the bit I'm less
sure about. But you're right—of course I trust you. And I know Zach trusts
Damon, which means I'm willing to trust him, too."

Elena's expression turned hopeful. "We'll be home on Sunday, so won't

miss any school. And we promise we'll have all our homework done before
we go. Pre y please say yes, Dad? Please?"

"I can find her and talk her into coming back with us. I know I can!" Jeremy
said.
With a sigh, Grayson relented. "You'll check in with me twice a day, Elena?
And I want Damon's and Ma 's phone numbers, and for the four of you to
make sure you keep your phones charged at all mes." Turning to Damon,
he said, "And hotel and flight informa on as soon as possible."

"Yes, sir. I'll have the details to you tomorrow morning, as soon as I get
everything booked."

"See that you do."

Elena pulled her hand from Damon's and stood to go to her father and give
him a hug. "Thank you, Daddy. I knew you'd understand."

He pa ed her back. "You're welcome. Just please don't make me regret it."

"We won't."

All three of them thanked Grayson and wished him goodnight as he got up
to get ready for bed. Jeremy disappeared inside his room as well, and Elena
walked Damon to the front door.

"Thank you for this," she whispered, standing on her ptoes to press her
lips to his.

"You're welcome. I can't wait to show you Venice Beach, and the Santa
Monica Pier, and the craziness of Hollywood Boulevard. It's gonna be a
blast!"

"I thought we were going out there to find Vickie, not to be all touristy?"
Elena laughed.

He chuckled, bending his head to plant a kiss on the p of her nose. "I'm
pre y sure we can do both."

A er Damon le , Elena died up the living room, then headed to her room
change into her pajamas. On her way to the bathroom to brush her teeth,
she no ced a light was s ll on in her father's bedroom. Impulsively she
stepped across the hall and knocked lightly. "Dad? You s ll up?"

"Yes, c'mon in," she heard him reply.

She pushed open the door and stepped inside. He was si ng up in bed
with one of his big spiral notebooks balanced across his thighs. Probably
going over accoun ng for the Clutch, she assumed.

Elena sat down on the edge of the ma ress and swiveled her body to face
him. "I just want to thank you again. It means a lot to me that you trust me
enough to let us go."

"I do trust you, honey. You know I do. And it's clear you trust Damon."

"I do. Very much," she admi ed.

Grayson broke eye contact to look back down at the pages he'd been
studying. He cleared his throat. "Elena, I'm glad you came in to talk to me,
because there's something I need to ask you."

"What's that, Daddy?"

He closed the ledger and set it aside. Then he looked up at her, frowning.
"Times like these I wish your mom was around to do this. I mean, I always
wish she was around, but…this is more of a mother-daughter type of…
conversa on…thing."

Elena no ced her father's face had flushed. For a moment she was
perplexed, but then she suddenly realized just what he was about to ask.
Heat flooded her own body, and she knew her cheeks had gone as red as
his. "Uh, Dad, you don't have to—"

"Like it or not, I do. Even if I don't really wanna know the answer."

She went s ll, bracing herself for it.

He drew in a deep breath. "Are you two, um," he started, before pausing to
exhale all the air out in a rush, "you know…are you being careful? Can you
please just assure me of that much?"

Her face grew even ho er, and she dropped her gaze to her fingers, which
had scrunched up the blanket under her hand. "I, uh, we, um…" She sighed
and nodded. "You don't have to worry, Dad, I swear."

"I'm your father—I can't help worrying no ma er how much I trust you.
You'll always be my baby girl. But Damon seems like a good guy, and I think
this is the happiest I've seen you since your mother passed."

"He is a good guy. And yeah, I'm pre y happy." She couldn't suppress a
smile.

"So does this mean you'll be sharing a hotel room with him? Or with your
brother?"

Elena mashed her lips together to hold back the giggle that wanted to
erupt. Not because her father's ques on was funny, but because she'd just
go en a mental image of the expressions on Damon's and Ma 's faces if
she told them they'd have to room together in Los Angeles.

"Um, I have no idea. Does it ma er?"

Grayson smiled. "No, I suppose at this point it really doesn't. Just—as I said
—be careful. And make sure you keep your grades up. I'd hate for you to
lose out on that scholarship you want so bad and screw up your college
plans just 'cause you're distracted right now by the throes of young love."

Elena laughed so ly. "No need to worry. That isn't going to happen. You
know college is my top priority. All my homework will be done before I
leave, and if there's any reading le , I'll bring it with me."

"That's my girl." Her father gave her a warm grin.

"As for the young love bit," she added, "that's not an issue, either. As I told
you before, we're keeping things casual."

He reached over and pa ed her hand. "Love isn't a bad thing, Elena. In
fact, it's kind of wonderful. You'll know when you're ready to open up your
heart and let someone in. I knew it on my first date with your mother."

"You did?"

"Yep. I had no doubt she was the right one for me. I just had to work a li le
to convince her of that." He yawned, covering his mouth with the back of
one hand. "On that note, it's past my bed me. Sleep well, swee e."

"Goodnight Daddy."

Elena lay on her side in her bed with her history reading assignment open
on the ma ress beside her, but she found she was having great difficulty
concentra ng on the sociological ramifica ons of the American Revolu on.
Her mind kept slipping back to her father's advice about love.

She'd never been in love; she'd read about it in books, seen it portrayed in
the movies, heard some of her friends talk about how much they loved
their boyfriends—but she'd never experienced it herself. The past few
years she hadn't really thought much about things like falling in love, and
when she had, she'd assumed it was something for later, when she was
older, something that right now would just get in the way and hold her
back from her goals. But, much as she was hesitant to admit it, she realized
things had changed recently. She had Damon in her life. And even though
they'd promised each other that they would only be friends with benefits
and that love wouldn't be allowed to complicate things, no ma er how
hard she tried, she just couldn't seem to curtail her ever-growing feelings
for him.

Being around Damon made her instantly happier. He had the strangest
ability to make her forget all her responsibili es and worries, at least
temporarily. Not that she ignored her studies when she was with him—far
from it. They both made sure she finished her homework before moving on
to other, more in mate ac vi es. And a er, curled up together in his bed,
his warm arms holding her close, her cheek against his bare chest, she
always felt this incredible sense of calm and contentment, like she could
stay this way, with him, for the rest of her life.

The way he made her feel—it was just so…intense. She knew she cared
about Damon more than she'd ever cared about any guy before. If she was
being honest, he rarely le her mind these days. Even when she was
supposed to be focusing on other things, random memories of the rich
tenor his voice when he said her name, or flashes of those mesmerizing
blue eyes gazing so intently at her, like he almost always did right a er
kissing her, would pop into her head. Warmth flooded her body and she
shivered, remembering the feeling of his fingers sliding over her naked
skin.

Elena swallowed thickly, closing the heavy textbook and pu ng it aside,

her eyes wide as she stared unseeingly at the ceiling.

Was this love? Is this what real love actually felt like?

"Oh my God. It is, isn't it?" she exclaimed so ly. She squeezed her eyes
closed in shock, but the flimsy barriers of her eyelids couldn't block it out,
wouldn't let her unknow what she'd just understood.

She groaned. The ramifica ons of this were bad. Very bad. They'd
promised each other that if their feelings intensified, they'd let the other
know right away. And this admission, as far as she understood, would
mean an immediate end to their fake-couple status. At that thought her
chest ghtened, her ribcage suddenly two sizes too small to contain her
heart.

This was not how it was supposed to go! She was supposed to be excited to
go off to school on her own in August. She was supposed to be a li le sad,
sure, but overall okay with saying goodbye to Damon, with le ng him go
when the me came. Not…not all pathe c and lonely and heartbroken!
Her clammy palms clutched at the sheets, her breath now puffing out in
shallow li le gasps.

Now what was she supposed to do? Did she need to tell him about this
change right away? They were going away together in a few days, and she
had been looking so forward to it. The last thing she wanted to do right
now was to create awkwardness between them and ruin their trip.

Maybe it could wait un l they returned home. Maybe, just maybe, it would
be okay for now to just kind of…bask in their me together? Enjoy being
with him to the fullest before having to admit that her feelings had
intensified? Or… maybe she didn't really need to tell him at all?

No, she'd made him a promise, and she intended to keep it. She'd tell him,
and she'd just have to put on her big-girl pan es and deal with the fallout.

But not un l they got back.

Damon wrenched his eyes open bright and early on Wednesday morning
and stumbled half-awake to the bathroom. Once he'd taken care of
business, he splashed some cold water on his face, came back and tugged
open the thick curtains to let the rising sun's warm glow flood his room.
Then he put on his glasses, picked up his computer, and stretched out on
his stomach on the bed in front of it, the clicking of his finger ps as they
flew over the keyboard the only background noise in the early morning
s llness.

When he'd returned home from Elena's last night, he'd jumped online and
a empted to book their plane ckets before going to sleep, but to his
frustra on found that the only flight to L.A. depar ng Friday morning out
of Richmond was already booked solid. This morning he was hoping
there'd been overnight cancella ons. Otherwise they were going to have
to leave a day late or a day early, and he wasn't sure if taking off as soon as
tomorrow morning would work for the others.
He checked the Friday flight. Shit. S ll booked solid. Sighing, he looked at
the Saturday morning op on. It was sold out, too. With an ever deepening
frown, he checked tomorrow morning's departure. There were only nine
seats available. And if they wanted to book it, they'd need to reserve four
of them.

Damon grabbed his cell phone from the night table and called Elena.

"Hey," she answered. He could hear the smile in her voice. It brought one
to his own face just knowing he'd played a part in pu ng it there.

"Hey, you talk to Ma yet?"

"Yep. He spoke to him mom and says he's good to go."

"Great. But I've already hit a poten al snag. The flight to L.A. Friday
morning is sold out. So's the one Saturday morning. Tomorrow morning,
however, is not, but there are only nine seats le . I need to book our
ckets ASAP if you guys are cool with leaving a day earlier than planned."

There was a short pause before she replied, "Well, I'm fine with it, and my
brother won't care, but I'll need to check with Ma , Bonnie, and my dad.
I'll call you back in a few minutes, okay?"

"No problem."

He hit the End Call bu on and got up to pull on a sweater. Even with
Spring's most welcome warmer temperatures, it was s ll pre y chilly in the
boarding house in the mornings. Instead of taking the me to stoke up the
embers in the fireplace, he pocketed his phone and went downstairs to
make himself a warming, awakening cup of coffee.

The downstairs of the big house was just as quiet as his floor had been. He
could detect neither sign nor sound of his uncle. Zach must have go en up
early himself and gone into town to get food or gas or something. Damon
shrugged. He'd likely be back soon enough, and Damon didn't really have
the full story to tell him un l he heard back from Elena.
Sure enough, just as he was se ling into his favorite comfortably worn
chair in the library, he felt the familiar vibra ons of his phone buzzing in his
pocket.

"Ma 's cool with leaving a day earlier," Elena said immediately. "And
Bonnie is fine to take my Thursday night shi , too. Dad frowned his
frowniest face, but he couldn't come up with any real reason to not let us
go tomorrow. So we're all in."

"Excellent." Damon got to his feet, one hand pressing his phone to his ear,
the other clutching his steaming mug, and began to make his way back up
the steps to his room. "I'm going to book our ckets right now."

"And the hotel?"

"Yes, that too. Which I'm s ll not going to name for you, but I'll text you
details of everything but that once I've got it all confirmed."

"Okay." She paused.

Damon could almost hear her thinking. "What's up?"

"I'm just trying to make a mental list of all the things I need to get done this
a ernoon before I go to work. Organizing, packing and ge ng everything
ready. I don't even have a suitcase!"

"Can you maybe borrow one from someone? I can ask Zach if you want."

Elena's voice got quiet as she thought about it. "Hmm, maybe." She paused
again, then, louder: "Oh! I just remembered my mom had one. I think it's
up in the a c. I'll go dig it out."

"Cool. Pack light—it'll be pre y warm in L.A. this me of year."

"Yeah?"

"Definitely. Just bring t-shirts, shorts, a swimsuit, sandals. Wear a hoodie

and jeans on the plane, and you won't need to pack any other long
sleeves."

"Okay, sounds good. Anything else? Will I need anything dressier?"

"Maybe a skirt or light dress to wear to dinner, but it's not mandatory. I
think shorts will be fine anywhere you want to go."

Elena was silent for a few moments. Then: "I can't believe I'm going away
with you."

Damon chuckled. "And your brother, and your ex. It's not exactly a
roman c vaca on for two." Much as I wish it were, he thought. He'd
already decided he was going to do his best to make it as fun for her as
possible.

"So…my dad asked me last night a er you le if you and I would be sharing
a hotel room."

"Did he?" He laughed out loud. "Oh man. Awkward. What did you say?"

He heard her exhale a rush of air. "I was totally mor fied. I just told him I
had no idea. At least he let it drop, thank God."

"You think he'd mind if we did?"

She sighed. "My dad's pre y open-minded, and he trusts me to make good
choices. I think he's already assumed we…you know."

Damon pressed his lips together, not sure whether he liked the idea that
Elena's father thought they were already sleeping together. Even if he was
right. "Okay, well…it's great he trusts you so much. Hope he trusts me,
too."

"He does."

"I'm glad. So then are you cool with it?"

"With what?"
"Sharing a room with me."

Elena snickered. "I was kind of coun ng on it."

"Good. Me, too."

"Listen, Damon, I'd be er go find Mom's suitcase and start packing. Are
you planning to come by the shop tonight?"

"Yep, I can do that. See you later."

"Later." She disconnected.

Twenty minutes later, Damon had booked their flights, hotel rooms—
making a request in the system for the two rooms to be on different floors
if possible—and last but not least, a rental car.

He texted the flight info to Elena to pass on to her father and Ma , and
then grabbed a towel and went downstairs to the gym. There was no point
in star ng to pack this early; he knew from experience it would only take
him about five minutes.

By the me Elena had carefully squeezed the plethora of items she'd

spread all across her bed into her mother's old blue suitcase, it was nearing
four-thirty. She snapped the lid shut, ran a brush through her hair, threw
on her jacket and hurried out the door.

Ten minutes later she was standing on the sidewalk in front of The Herald
looking curiously at the elas c-wrapped stack of le ers she'd just picked up
from her editor. Across the envelope on the top of the pile she spo ed the
black crow-scratch wri ng she'd become all-too familiar with, and her
heart-rate sped up a li le.

Gilbert's Coffee Clutch was only a short walk down the street, but Elena
just couldn't wait to find out what it said. She stopped and leaned against a
tree at the corner of Main and Spruce, pulling the envelope out of the pile
and shoving the rest of the le ers into her knapsack.

She read it through quickly, her smile stretching wider with every sentence.
This le er had a different tone from the ones she'd received before, and
she could actually feel the hope radia ng from JAI's words. He finally
seemed to be looking forward to his future again. She couldn't help feeling
proud of him for taking the difficult and emo onal steps he'd clearly just
pushed himself through.

Elena knew she wouldn't have me to cra a reply un l later tonight once
she was back home and in bed—too many poten ally curious eyes would
be around her in the mean me—but she had a sudden inspira on of just
what she wanted to write. And it made her feel lighter s ll knowing how
honest she planned to be this me.

A/N So sorry for the delay in pos ng. I was quite sick last month and my
muse has been stubborn and mostly absent since. Thank you for your
pa ence, and to all of you who have taken the me to leave me reviews.
They o en inspire me to get wri ng again, so they mean a GREAT deal to
me! (the very best gi a reader can give to the writers they appreciate, tbh)
Extra thanks to someonestolemyshoes and siberia21 for pre-reading and
giving me feedback. Love you both. Happy Holidays! xo
21. Chapter 21
Chapter 21

The pinging of Elena's phone alarm wrested her from an uneasy sleep. She
woke to a pitch-black room and silent house, presumably because it was
five o'clock in the morning. All ves ges of grogginess fell away as she
remembered what today was and she bolted upright, shoving the covers
off to dart into the hallway and pound on her brother's door.

"Jer! Time to wake up!" she called, her heart racing with excitement.

She turned as her dad's bedroom door creaked open and his head poked
out, his face s ll doughy with sleep. "Morning, swee e. I'll make sure he
gets up. You'd be er jump in the shower quick while it's free."

She smiled. "Morning, Daddy. That's a good idea, thanks!"

Thirty minutes later, Elena was clean, dressed, had her hair up in a neat
ponytail, toast in her belly, and stood ready at the front door. Her toe
tapped out a rapid rhythm against the scuffed linoleum as she watched the
street through the small square window. A wide smile broke across her
face when she at last spo ed Damon's Jeep.

"Jer!" she called. "He's here. C'mon!"

Her brother hurried into the entranceway a few moments later lugging a
half-unzipped duffel bag. Just as Jeremy was cramming his feet into his
sneakers, Damon knocked on the door.

Elena pulled it open, s ll grinning. "Good morning! You didn't have to

come in. We were just on our way out."

Damon bent down to greet her with a quick kiss. "Morning." His eyes
swept over the siblings, taking in Jeremy yanking fruitlessly on his bag's
stuck zipper. One of Damon's brows quirked. "So you guys are all ready to
go?"

With a sigh, Jeremy gave up on the stubborn zipper. He got to his feet and
pulled his jean jacket from the hall closet. "Yep. Let's hit the road."

"Morning, Damon." Grayson emerged from the kitchen, blowing over the
top of a steaming mug of coffee. He was already dressed for work. "I trust
you've got everything under control?"

"Good morning, sir. Yes," he pa ed his jacket pocket where Elena

presumed their plane ckets were tucked, "we're all set."

Jeremy picked up his duffel and turned to his father, who clapped a hand
on his shoulder. "Hope you find Vickie, I really do, but even if things don't
end up going the way you want, try to have some fun out there."

"I will, Dad."

"One more thing: I know you're almost seventeen, but I want you to
promise me you'll listen to your sister. You're s ll a minor, so she's in
charge this weekend. Okay?"

Jeremy rolled his eyes. "Whatever."

Elena stepped forward and gave her dad a big hug. "Thanks again, Daddy.
We'll be fine, don't worry. I'll call you as soon as we land."

"See that you do." Grayson's voice sounded a li le rough. It would be the
first me he'd be alone in the house since before the kids were born, and
Elena knew he wouldn't feel right un l they were both back home in their
own beds.

Damon picked up Elena's suitcase and held the door open for her and her
brother. Once their bags were stowed in the back of the Jeep and everyone
was buckled in, coffee and hot chocolate-filled travel mugs in each hand,
they waved goodbye to Grayson, who was standing on the doorstep, and
got on their way.

Thanks to road-work reducing lanes for a good ten miles along the
highway, the drive to Richmond took just under two hours. Jeremy had his
earbuds in and dozed in the backseat most of the way. Elena, on the other
hand, cha ed happily, peppering Damon with ques ons about airports and
airplanes and hotels and California. He was more than happy to try to
answer as best he could, and it made the commute pass faster. Each me
he explained something cool to her, Elena's smile seemed to grow
impossibly wider. Her excitement rubbed off on him, and before long his
side of their conversa on had become as animated as hers.

At last they arrived at Richmond Interna onal Airport, found parking, and
caught the shu le bus to the terminal. They didn't have any difficulty
finding Ma —he was wai ng for them just inside the main doors. A
relieved expression crossed his face as soon as he spo ed them.

"Finally!" Ma exclaimed, throwing his backpack back over his shoulder.

"C'mon, I've already scoped out where we need to be. The check-in line's
over here." He pointed to his right.

They went down the hall and joined the end of a long line up for the
American Airlines domes c flights counter. A er they'd waited for about
five minutes, shuffling forward in minute increments, Elena remembered
the le er to JAI that she'd tucked inside her purse. She stood on her toes
and craned her neck to look around, at last spo ng a blue U.S. Post box
next to the restrooms along the far wall.

"I need to use the washroom. Be right back," she whispered to Damon,
poin ng toward her des na on. He nodded and took hold of her suitcase
handle.

Elena carefully pushed her way through the ever-growing crowd and le
the lineup. More and more people seemed to be arriving every minute.
She saw babies crying in their mother's arms and overloaded fathers
dragging heavy suitcases behind them. In front of her, a couple was arguing
loudly over whose fault it was that they'd arrived late and missed their
flight. The cacophony of noises surrounding Elena all began to blend into
an overarching dull roar as she hurried toward her des na on.

Once she reached the post box, she took a quick glance over her shoulder
to see if any of her friends were watching her. Ma and Jeremy appeared
to be cha ng, and Damon's eyes were fixed up on the row of screens
displaying con nually changing departure informa on. None of them were
looking her way, so she quickly pulled out the envelope and slid it into the
box. Before heading back, she slipped inside the ladies' room as she'd
stated; it had been a long drive, a er all.

When she ducked under the line divider and re-joined the others, who in
her absence had made their way around a bend, doubled back, and were
finally approaching the counter, Damon casually reached over and slid an
arm around her waist, pulling her close to him as he talked to Jeremy about
basketball. He didn't even pause in his sentence, and she couldn't help
smiling to herself, pleased to feel his fingers against her side through the
co on of her hoodie.

If only we could always be as comfortable with each other as this, she

thought with a strange sense of yearning as she reflected on her recent
revela ons about her true feelings, not to men on the probable
consequences once she admi ed them to Damon.

He didn't appear to no ce her sudden melancholy, and excitement

overtook her again a short me later once it was finally their turn to
approach the check-in counter. The four of them walked up together, but
the others stood back and let Damon do most of the talking. Before long
they had their seats confirmed, their luggage checked, and their boarding
passes in hand.

Next came the line-up for security. Elena sighed so ly when she saw all the
people wai ng in front of them. She was sure this queue was even longer
than the one to check in.
"Don't worry," Damon murmured, leaning close. He gestured toward the
big digital clock on the far wall. "We won't miss our flight. We've s ll got
plenty of me." His breath ckled her earlobe and she shivered, looking up
at him with a small, grateful smile.

It took quite a while to navigate this line, and the general mood of their
fellow travelers seemed more of frustra on than an cipa on, but
eventually Elena and her friends made it past the security check with no
hassles.

The next forty minutes were spent hanging out in the departure lounge
beside their gate. Elena's restlessness grew more obvious; she kept ge ng
up and crossing over to the large floor-to-ceiling windows, studying the
planes lined up on the tarmac outside, then returning to sit beside Damon
for a few more minutes, fidge ng with her magazine, crossing and
uncrossing her legs before rising to do it all over again. He seemed amused
by her impa ence and tried his best to get her to relax, but it was no use.
She was far too keyed up right now to focus on anything for very long.

Finally, a er what felt like several life mes to Elena, boarding for their
flight was announced, and they hauled their knapsacks back to their
shoulders and got in line once more. A er their boarding passes were yet
again checked, they joined the rear of the group of people making their
way down the gradual slope of the jetbridge and waited their turn to board
the aircra . Elena and Damon found their seats near the back of the cabin,
directly behind Ma and Jeremy. Damon insisted she take the one by the
window, and he stored their carry-on bags in the overhead compartment
before si ng down beside her.

Elena eyes were s ll dar ng around, and she flashed him a wobbly smile.
She was both excited and nervous at the thought of flying. When the
'Fasten Seatbelts' sign lit up on the ceiling and the flight a endant stood in
the aisle and asked for their a en on before star ng to go over what to do
in case of an emergency, she reached for Damon's hand. Then the plane
began trundling slowly toward take-off posi on on the runaway. Elena's
heart throbbed in her chest, as loud and relentless as na ve drums in
those old black and white movies she some mes watched with her dad on
Sunday a ernoons. She gripped Damon's fingers.

He leaned his head close to hers. "Nervous?" he whispered. She felt his
exhala on sway some loose tendrils of her hair which had escaped her
ponytail.

"Kind of," Elena admi ed, giving his hand another squeeze. She had to
remind herself not to hold on to him too ghtly.

"The take-off's the worst bit. Then we'll even out and it'll all be fine. You'll
be able to see Richmond ge ng smaller and smaller below us."

Elena gulped, staring at the nubby blue fabric on the back of her brother's
seat. People did this all the me; surely it wasn't really all that big of a
deal? She could overhear Jeremy and Ma talking excitedly about Los
Angeles. Neither of them had ever flown before either, yet they didn't
seem to be freaked out at all. She took a few deep breaths and tried to
force herself to relax, like they were. But her body was having none of it.

The en re plane started to vibrate. She heard the drone of the engines
swell to a low roar as they revved. Elena clutched her armrest with her free
fingers and clenched her teeth, her spine rigid against her seat back.

"Okay, this is it. We're about to take off," Damon said so ly. He rubbed
reassuring circles with his thumb over the back of her hand.

The airplane sped down the runway faster, faster. Elena stared out the
window at the blurred buildings and grass and tarmac whipping by, her
heart now galloping. She could feel her own pulse throbbing in her throat,
her ears. She no longer heard the sounds of the other passengers around
her; the only sound was her heart's incessant drumming. Thump. Thump.
Thump.

Just before true panic set in, before she could leap to her feet and make
her escape, the scenery began to lt as the wheels le the ground. Elena
squeezed Damon's hand again, inhaling a sharp breath, infla ng her lungs
and refusing to let it go. She felt the nega ve g-force push her body firmly
into her seat.

So much for any hope of escape.

"Elena?"

She turned her head to the le just a li le, just enough so she could look at
Damon. It seemed to take a lot more effort than usual.

"Breathe," he said.

Realizing she had yet to exhale, she let it all out in a long sigh. He smiled at
her reassuringly, leaning in to whisper. "You're fine. We're flying. Now
please try to relax, okay? We've got a lot of hours to go before we get
there. Can't have my girl passing out before we even hit cruising al tude."

A happy grin stretched her lips, and she felt a big ball of tension seep away.
Did he just call her his girl? The thought made warmth spread across her
chest as she took another deep breath. She liked being Damon's girl. Liked
it more than he knew, more than was safe for her own emo onal well-
being. She turned to look out the window again, distrac ng herself by
marveling at the city falling away from them, growing smaller and smaller
as they rose. The cars and trucks were li le more than colored dots on the
highway below. They didn't even seem real.

Elena spent a good part of the journey with her forehead pressed against
the window, watching in awe as the landscape crept by in the distance. The
cloud cover came and went, but it broke up enough for her to see the vast
Mississippi river, winding like a fat, silver snake through deep green forests
and miniature towns. Further on, the Great Plains stretched away, forming
ny yellow and pale green checkerboards as far as her eyes could see.
Then came the majes c Rocky Mountains, rising up from the earth. She'd
read so much about them in books, seen them on television, but from way
up here in the sky they looked like some weird alien moonscape, all jagged
dark precipices and snow-covered ps, with dark valleys slashing through
their midst. White, thread-like roads zigzagged along the mountainsides.
Thick clouds crowning the highest peaks soon obscured everything from
view again.

And when they next broke apart enough for Elena to see the ground, her
brows drew ght in confusion. In the distance she spo ed a huge reddish
brown cataract, a wide slashing chasm in the desert, divided only by the
glint of a winding river far below.

"What is that?" she asked Damon as they drew closer, poin ng out the
window and leaning back so he could stretch across her to see. "Is that…?"

He took a look outside, and then turned to meet her eyes with a smile.
"That's the Grand Canyon. Pre y amazing from up here, huh?"

"No way!" she gasped.

"Yep."

Elena's voice was nged with wonder. "Holy cow. I had no idea it was so…"

"Massive?" he laughed, se ling back into his seat so she could look back
out.

She nodded, pressing her forehead to the window to examine it more

carefully. "It looks like a giant crack in the Earth's crust, like the kind of
thing you see on those science shows about how the planet was formed.
How long is it?"

"Um, about 300 miles I think. Maybe a bit less. I'll Google it for you once
we land. My parents took us when we were kids. My brother was too
scared to go anywhere near the edge, but I walked right up to the fence
with my dad. It was breath-taking. You can't tell from up here, but there
are hundreds of different varia ons of colors in the strata. It's incredibly
beau ful."

Turning to look at him, Elena let her back fall against her seat once more.
"You're so lucky."
Damon could think of quite a few reasons why he didn't agree, but he kept
silent. "Why's that?"

"You've go en to travel so much. I've never been anywhere." She paused,

and then added so ly, "At least not before I met you."

"Well, we're in the process of changing that, aren't we? Maybe someday I'll
take you to the Grand Canyon. It's only a few hours from Las Vegas. We
could make a weekend of it." He chuckled. "Although that'd probably be a
lot more fun for you once you're twenty-one."

Elena smiled. She loved to hear him speak of future plans like he thought
they might really do these things together. She didn't know why he said
stuff like that—stuff that could never actually happen—but it made her
heart do li le somersaults each me he did. Not that she'd let any real
hope blossom. Living in denial was a dangerous indulgence, but just for this
weekend she'd decided to allow herself the luxury of pretending they had
an actual future together. She wasn't going to deal with reality un l they
were back in Mys c Falls. Even if it was only delaying the inevitable, she
felt she deserved that much.

So she leaned her face close to his and kissed him so ly. "I'd love that."

It took a li le over five hours to fly to Los Angeles, as a strong tailwind

shortened their flight me by twenty minutes. Much as Damon was
enjoying observing Elena's clear delight over the en re experience—once
she got past her ini al nerves, that is—he felt relief sweep over him when
the wheels finally touched the tarmac at LAX. As they disembarked, he
reminded the others to adjust the me on their phones back three hours.
It was only 12:45 Pacific me, which meant they s ll had most of the day
ahead of them to get se led and begin their search for Vickie.

A er an addi onal forty-five minutes wai ng for everyone to collect their

luggage from the baggage carousel, they at last made it outside onto the
hot, sunny pavement. Scanning the many wai ng vehicles pulled up to the
curb, it didn't take long for Damon to spot the bright yellow Hertz shu le
bus that would take them to the rental car agency.

Once they were se led onboard, Jeremy pulled his phone from his jacket
and announced he was sending Vickie a message to let her know he was in
town and wanted to see her. This reminded Elena that she'd promised to
check in with her dad as soon as they'd landed, so she gave him a quick call
as the bus dodged and swerved its way through the busy airport traffic.

The shu le jerked to a half in front of the Hertz rental office a few minutes
later. Without thinking about it, Damon reached for Elena's hand to help
her disembark before he went around back to collect their baggage.

"Wait here," he told them as they walked inside the office, gesturing
toward a row of hard plas c chairs before he joined the back of the line of
people wai ng their turn at the counter.

As Damon shuffled forward, he glanced behind him. Ma was cha ng

with Elena, while Jeremy paid no a en on to them, staring at his phone
and tapping away. Damon wondered if he'd heard back from Vickie yet. He
hoped this would be easier than he expected it to be. Maybe Vickie would
actually be willing to meet up with them and save them all the hassle of
trying to track her down and convince her to return with them. But as he
knew all too well, life very rarely presented the easy path.

Thankfully, Hertz seemed to be staffed by very efficient agents, and this

par cular line moved along well. In less than ten minutes, Damon had the
keys to a red Toyota Prius in his pocket and was trying with some difficulty
to arrange their suitcases so they'd all fit in the rather compact trunk. Ma
offered to hold his duffle on his lap, and at last they were on their way to
the hotel.

"Check it out," Damon said as they rounded a corner, poin ng out the
windshield. A block ahead sat a squat flat-roofed building with a gigan c
pale brown ring mounted on the roof. "Randy's Donuts!" he exclaimed.

"Whoa!" Elena said, her brows shoo ng up.

No cing her incredulous expression, Damon added, "It's a famous LA
landmark."

She looked at him with a bemused smile and shrugged. "Never heard of it.
Are we stopping there?"

Damon laughed. "Maybe on the way home." He con nued driving along
West Manchester Boulevard, took a le , then a quick right, and soon they
were speeding down Highway 495.

"Vickie just replied," Jeremy suddenly announced from the backseat.

Elena twisted her upper body to peer at him over her shoulder. Before she
could speak, Ma cut in. "And? What did she say? Did you tell her I'm with
you?"

Jeremy tore his eyes from his phone, glancing sideways at Ma with an
irritated expression. "No, not yet. I'm trying not to freak her the fuck out. If
she knows why we're all here, she might go silent again. She didn't tell me
where she was, but said she'd message me tomorrow and maybe we could
meet up."

Elena sighed with relief. "Awesome."

"That's a good start," Ma agreed. "But if you think you're gonna go meet
her without me, think again."

With a sigh and an eye roll, Jeremy mu ered, "Yeah, okay."

Before long, Damon had exited the highway and was working his way
through traffic along the famous Sunset Boulevard. He spo ed the eye-
catching baby blue and white façade of the Paladian Hotel coming up on
the right and turned into the curved driveway, pulling smoothly up in front
the grand arched entrance.

Elena gasped, her fingers unconsciously reaching for his wrist and
squeezing. "This is the place? We're staying here?"
Damon just smiled at her and got out of the car to speak with the valet
who had walked over to greet them. A er unloading their luggage and
handing over the keys, he took Elena's hand and led her through the tall
glass doors into the lobby, Ma and Jeremy trailing close behind.

As they strode across the gleaming black and white checked le to the
recep on desk, Damon shot a glance at Elena from the corner of his eye.
He tugged her de ly aside to prevent her walking right into a curved-back
mahogany chair; she was so distracted she wasn't watching where she was
going. Her neck twisted and turned in every direc on as she tried to take in
all the details of the elaborate Art Deco lobby.

The Paladian had been built in 1927, two years before the stock market
took its most famous free-fall. As such, the hotel was a monument to
modern (at the me) pala al excess. A narrow twenty-floor tower rose up
above the much wider first and second floor. The main floor and mezzanine
housed not only the lobby but the bar, five-star restaurant, and several
state of the art mee ng rooms.

A massive chandelier hung high above the open center of the lobby.
Thousands of dangling cut crystals glinted like diamonds, reflec ng
mul colored dapples of light down on them from the ornate stained glass
windows all around the perimeter of the ceiling above. Damon heard Elena
suck in her breath when she no ced.

Grinning to himself, he released her hand and let her ogle, sauntering up to
the polished black wood counter. The word RECEPTION was mounted on
the wall behind it in large square stainless steel le ers. Behind the desk, a
pre y blonde greeted him with a bright red-lips cked smile.

Dar ng a glance at her name tag pinned over one prominent breast,
Damon mirrored her smile right back at her. "Good a ernoon, Lydia. I'd like
to check in, please."

She looked him over, her ultra-white teeth gleaming. She seemed to like
what she saw. "Welcome to the Paladian, Mr.…?"
"Salvatore," Damon told her. "I have reserva ons for the next three
nights."

A er clicking away at her keyboard for a moment, Lydia raised her gaze
back to him. "Yes, here it is. Was it for two double rooms?"

"One double and one single with a king bed." He looked over his shoulder
at Elena. She was si ng on a circular couch upholstered in rich maroon
velvet, talking to Jeremy and Ma excitedly. "On different floors if
possible," Damon added, turning back and flashing Lydia his most
charming grin.

"Everything looks good, Mr. Salvatore. I'll just need to see your credit card,
please."

Damon handed over his card, again glancing back at Elena as he waited for
the check in to be completed. Once he'd signed and go en their room
keys, he rejoined the others.

"You guys ready? We've got rooms 507 and 701" He handed Ma a key
card, picked up both his and Elena's bags, and then indicated toward the
elevator bank, which was in the back of the lobby, with one elbow.

Each set of elevator doors had symmetrical swooping arches and fans in
shades of gray, taupe and chocolate brown with gold filigree detailing.
"Wow," Elena said, gliding her finger ps over the shiny enamel as they
waited for a car to descend. "This place is totally beau ful!"

"It's all original Art Deco, from the twen es," Damon told her. He had an
urge to reach out and rub the small of her back, but his hands were
occupied with their bags. Instead he leaned closer to her ear, whispering, "I
thought you might like this place."

"I love it," she said simply, turning to grin happily up at him. For a moment,
he thought she was about to kiss him.
"I'm starving," Jeremy interrupted with an eye roll. "You guys think we
could go eat soon?"

With a ping, the elevator doors slid open and they stepped onboard.
Damon set their bags on the floor and punched the bu ons for floors five
and seven. They glowed orange on the narrow brass control panel.

Turning to Jeremy and Ma , Damon said, "I want to grab a quick shower
and change before we head out. We'll meet you down in the lobby in, uh,"
he glanced down at his watch, "how about thirty minutes?"

When the doors began to slide open on the fi h floor, Jeremy turned to his
sister. "Are you bunking with me or…?" One side of his mouth curved into a
knowing half-grin

Elena's face flushed vivid red. "Um…" Her forehead creased as her eyes
darted, panic-stricken, to Damon for help.

Jeremy laughed. "Don't freak out, 'Lena. I'm just having a li le fun with ya.
C'mon Ma . We'll see you guys downstairs in a bit."

Ma and Jeremy disembarked, both s ll chuckling, leaving Damon and

Elena to con nue up to the seventh floor.

Before Damon could grab it, Elena picked her mom's suitcase up and
stepped out into the hallway. "Which room are we in again?"

"701." Damon took a quick look around before poin ng le down the hall.
"This way."

He came to a halt at the end of the red-carpeted hallway and slid his key
card into the slot in the door. Pushing it open with one arm, he braced it
for Elena to pass in front of him.

The room had a geometric-pa erned parquet floor, with plush dark brown
rugs at the entrance and in the space between the two queen-sized beds.
Damon's brows drew together when he spo ed the beds.
"Dammit," he sighed, "I specifically requested one king." Dropping his
duffle bag to the floor, he strode over and dropped onto the edge of one
white and gold bedspread, reaching for the black retro-style phone on the
nightstand. "Sorry. I'll have to call Recep on and get our room switched."

"Don't."

He looked up at Elena in surprise, the hand holding the telephone receiver

pausing midway to his ear.

"This room is amazing, Damon. I don't want to move. So what if we have

an extra bed." She laughed, tossing her suitcase into the middle of it. "We
can spread out our stuff out on it, and steal the pillows if we need extra."

Elena's happy expression and carefree laughter brought a smile to his own
face. He replaced the receiver and walked over to her, bracing his hands on
the sides of her hips. Looking down into those amazing big brown eyes, he
said, "You sure? I just want this to be perfect for you."

She stood on ptoes and pressed her lips to his. "It is perfect. I've never
stayed in a hotel before, and this one you picked is amazing." She giggled
again. "I already said 'amazing', didn't I?"

Damon nodded, dropping another kiss onto the p of her nose. "I'm glad
you like it." He turned around and pulled off his t-shirt, tossing it carelessly
onto the same bed where she'd thrown her suitcase. When he turned back
to her, he caught her staring at his chest. A smirk curved one side of his
lips; he recognized that look in her eyes. Glancing at the clock on the
nightstand, he moved close to her again. "I'm jumping into the shower to
wash all the travel-grime off me." With a waggle of his eyebrows, he
added, "Care to join me?"

Another adorable flush spread over Elena's face. "Uh…um…" Cleary that
idea had taken her by surprise. "I think I'm okay for now," she mumbled,
turning her back to him and star ng to unzip her suitcase.
"Suit yourself," he said. "There's a Jacuzzi tub in the bathroom, so maybe
we can try that out later."

She whirled around, excitement once more overtaking her. "There is?"

Before he could reply, she'd raced to the bathroom to check it out. "Holy
cow! Damon, this bathroom is more than twice the size of ours at home!
That tub is massive! And is that shower curtain real velvet?"

He walked in a er her to find her rubbing the black and white shower
curtain between two fingers, an astonished expression on her face. Her
reac ons to everything made him feel all warm and ngly inside. He kept
trying to think of new ways to surprise her, please her, to be the source of
that delight on her face, over and over again. Every me she smiled, a
wave of immense pleasure shot through him.

Damon's gaze landed on the fancy miniature toiletries on a silver tray

beside the sink. "See those?" He lted his chin in their direc on.

Elena's a en on shi ed to the li le bo les and wrapped packages. She

picked them up one by one, reading the packaging out loud. "Luxurious
Oleander shampoo, Intense Moisturizing condi oner, Invigora ng
Oleander shower gel, Nourishing Oleander body lo on, French-milled bath
bar, face bar, shower cap. Oh my God—there's even a li le sewing kit and
shoe polish!"

"You can keep all that stuff," Damon told her. "The cleaning staff will just
replace it every day, anyway. Take whatever you want."

He turned on the water in the shower and unzipped his fly, glancing over
his shoulder as he heard the door close. She'd gone back out to the main
room, obviously to give him privacy. He was slightly disappointed, but with
one glance at the tub, he began thinking of ways they could enjoy it
together later, when they weren't in any hurry.

Of course, such thoughts during his shower kept his mind decidedly
distracted, and when he emerged from the bathroom several minutes later
wearing nothing but a fluffy black towel, he was pleased to note they s ll
had nearly fi een minutes before they needed to head down to the lobby.

Elena was lying across the closest bed, flipping through the Guide to Los
Angeles that the hotel provided in each room. She s ll wore her jeans and
t-shirt, although her purple hoodie was now draped over a chair.

"You haven't changed yet," he observed, stretching out across the bed
beside her and giving her a lazy smile.

She set the binder on the side table and looked over at him, one eyebrow
raised. "Neither have you."

"True." Damon reached for the hem of her t-shirt and began to fiddle with
it. "Guess you'd be er take this off then." He tugged the top up over her
head, exposing her beige bra. It was u litarian, nothing fancy, but the sight
of all that creamy flesh surrounding it, not to men on her hard li le
nipples poking against the co on, made his dick even harder than it had
been when he'd stepped into the room. With a wicked smile, he lowered
his mouth to one fabric-covered peak.

"Damon!" she gasped. "We don't have me to..."

He li ed his face to look her in the eyes. "Trust your teacher, Elena," he
smirked. "This lesson is what's known as a 'quickie.'"

Elena's cheeks were flushed and her hair was s ll a bit disheveled as she
hurried across the lobby toward Jeremy and Ma , who sat wai ng for
them in matching red curved-back chairs near the big front windows.
Damon trailed a few feet behind her.

Jeremy took one look at them and snorted, shaking his head. "Really?" he
hissed to his sister. "You two couldn't wait a few more hours?"

Her face grew even ho er. Leave it to her brother to no ce and men on
anything he thought would make her uncomfortable. "What? We're here.
C'mon, let's go eat."

She heard Damon chuckle behind her, but he didn't say anything, just slid
his fingers through hers and tugged her toward the entrance as the guys
got up to follow.

Damon hailed them a cab, and without hesita on asked that they be taken
to Hollywood Boulevard. He got in the front with the driver, leaving the
others to squeeze into the back. It was a compact car, and the backseat
was cramped with all three of them vying for space. Elena was sandwiched
between Ma and Jeremy. Though their shoulders were touching, she
couldn't help no cing that Ma seemed to be avoiding her gaze. When she
tried to make small talk, he answered with mostly monosyllabic grunts.
Elena frowned, wondering if he was upset with her, although she knew
more than likely he was just mired in worry over his sister.

Once out of the taxi, they made their way along the tourist-infested
sidewalk for a while before Damon indicated a place they should stop. He'd
spo ed a 1950's style diner that seemed slightly less crowded than the
other eateries they'd passed along this block. It was early a ernoon, but
their bodies were s ll on East Coast me and their stomachs were
grumbling.

A er appeasing their hunger, they walked around, checking out the Walk
of Fame, the famous hand and footprints in the cement in front of Mann's
Chinese Theatre, and the Hollywood and Highland Center, a huge complex
containing a shopping mall, restaurants, nightclubs and the Dolby Theatre
where the Academy Awards were held. Jeremy kept checking his phone,
but he got no further communica ons from Vickie. To Elena's relief, Ma 's
re cence improved a li le once he had food in his belly, but he s ll looked
like he could think of a dozen places he'd rather be. She tried not to worry
about it; if Ma had issues with her da ng Damon, it was Ma 's problem,
not hers.

She and Damon held hands most of the me while they walked, and he
kept shoo ng her li le smiles that made her suspect he was enjoying
himself just as much as she was.

Once they le the complex and were once more out on the sidewalk,
standing between a guy dressed as Spiderman and a woman dressed as
Elsa from the movie 'Frozen', Ma turned to Damon and Elena. "You know,
with the me change and all, I'm actually pre y beat. You guys mind if Jer
and I just head back to the hotel? We can meet up with you for breakfast
tomorrow morning or whatever."

Damon nodded. "Sure, that's cool."

"Text me when you get back so I know you got there safely," Elena told
Jeremy. "And let me know if you hear from Vickie, of course."

The boys agreed. A row of cabs were lined up along the curb wai ng for
tourists, so they jumped into the one at the front of the queue, waving
goodbye.

As Elena watched their taxi speed off, she felt Damon's hand on the small
of her back. "So now what do you want to do?" he asked, his lips again
close by her ear. Once again she shivered. Even though it had been over a
month since they'd first hooked up, her body s ll reacted to him like a jolt
of electricity passed between them each me he was near.

She turned to face him, looking up into those crystal clear blue eyes,
studying him, trying to see what lay beneath the calm surface. The words 'I
love you' rose unbidden to her lips, but she forced them back down. She
did love him; there was no ques on of it now. She knew it was going to be
excrucia ng when the me came to confess it, and he inevitably told her
they needed to put a stop to all this.

So instead, she slid her arms around his waist, rose on her toes and kissed
him. She would enjoy this weekend with Damon with everything in her,
and face whatever the future held once her feet were firmly back on the
soil of Mys c Falls.
A/N Yes, I know this update took a while. I'm so sorry. I feel very guilty
about making you guys wait so long. It's an extra long chapter, so hope you
can forgive me. My muse with this story is s ll being elusive, but I hope I
can force her back into mo va on soon, as there are only 5 more chapters
to go. Thanks to siberia21 who pre-read this for me and thanks to all of you
who take that extra minute or to to leave me a review. Your reviews means
the world to me. Happy New Year!
22. Chapter 22
Chapter 22

Sunlight sliced into the room through the long ver cal slit where the heavy
drapes came together and created a glowing stripe across Elena's face,
rousing her. She squinted into the glare, rolling over in Damon's sleeping
embrace to try to re-find her sweet spot, but it was no use—her bladder
insisted she rise. Groaning so ly, she pushed back the blankets and
stumbled half-awake to the bathroom.

The previous evening had been possibly the best night of her en re young
life. A er Jeremy and Ma headed back to the hotel, Damon had taken her
out to dinner at a li le Thai restaurant further down Hollywood Boulevard.
She'd never eaten Thai food before and had no idea what even to choose,
but he'd ordered for both of them, and they'd shared some delicious—if
rather spicy—dishes. Later, as they were walking down the sidewalk
a erward, she'd pointed out a poster for a movie she'd been curious
about. Next thing she knew, Damon had spun them around and taken her
back to the world famous Mann's Chinese Theatre, insis ng that they
should see it. Armed with a massive box of popcorn, they'd se led down
into plush red velvet seats, and, once the popcorn had been demolished,
he had held her hand for the en re rest of the movie. Elena'd had difficulty
concentra ng on the ac on on the screen; all her thoughts were wrapped
up in the man beside her and what she might have to look forward to, not
only when they got back to the hotel, but for the en re rest of the
weekend.

And she had not been disappointed.

The minute they'd stepped inside their room, Damon headed straight into
the bathroom and turned on the water to fill the large Jacuzzi tub. A few
minutes later, as she'd sat on the bed typing a text to her dad to assure him
they were all healthy, happy and having a good me, he called out to her.
"Ooooh Elena?" She looked up and heard water splashing. "This would be a
lot more fun if you actually joined me." He stretched out the word joined in
a sing-song way, bringing a grin to her face.

"Coming!" she said, ge ng to her feet and going over to the closet to pull
open the door. Hanging inside were the two fluffy white robes she'd
spo ed earlier. Elena quickly stripped off her clothes and slipped into the
smaller of the two. The fabric was the fuzziest, so est co on she had ever
felt against her skin. Her old threadbare robe back home seemed like it was
made from sandpaper compared to this.

Steam was already billowing from the par ally ajar bathroom door, and as
she pushed it open, a hazy cloud enveloped her. Bi ng her lower lip, Elena
slid the robe from her shoulders and hung it on a hook on the back of the
door before turning toward the foam-filled tub.

Damon's eyes drank her in as she approached, one of his muscled arms
res ng along the edge of the gleaming white porcelain. Flicking suds at her
from the ps of his fingers, he said, "Just to warn you—it's hot."

Elena felt her cheeks redden—a reac on that always, always, seemed to
happen when either of them was naked or nearly naked around the other.
The water sloshed again as he moved over, and she gingerly stepped in and
sunk down into the foam beside him.

When she was fully submerged to her chin beneath a thick layer of
bubbles, the solidness of his le leg pressed against the side of hers, she
met his eyes and smiled. "I've never had a bath with anyone before." She
snorted. "Well, other than Jer when we were li le…but I'm pre y sure that
doesn't count."

"Yeah, sharing a tub with li le brothers as kids is definitely not the same,"
he smirked, si ng up a li le. Reaching for the soap in the stainless steel
dish hanging off the side of the tub, he said, "Turn around.

Elena carefully shi ed her body so she was si ng between his legs with
her back to him. His warm, soapy hands slid up her back to cup her
shoulders, and she shivered again.

"You can't possibly be chilly?" he wondered.

"No…I'm just…no."

Damon had chuckled so ly and con nued to run his fingers over her skin.

Smiling to herself as she washed her hands in the marble sink, Elena
remembered how he'd oh-so-gently and carefully soaped her upper back
and arms, and how she'd turned around to return the favor. He hadn't let
her get very far before pulling her into a deep kiss. And not many minutes
later, they'd abandoned the foam-filled tub for the bathroom counter…and
then the bed. It had been well a er midnight before they'd finally fallen
asleep curled up in an exhausted, yet blissful tangle of sheets and limbs.

She wore a sleepy smile as she padded back to the bed and slipped in
beside Damon again. He rolled over to face her, his eyelashes flu ering
open and his lips curving into a matching smile when he locked eyes with
hers.

"Morning," he whispered, leaning over to greet her with a kiss. His stubble
scratched against Elena's chin, just as it had that other morning they'd
woken up together so many weeks before. She found she didn't mind at all,
in fact it was kind of…

The telephone on the nightstand began to ring. With a groan, Damon flung
an arm behind him and dragged the receiver to his ear.

"Hello?" he grunted, not bothering to try to hide his annoyance. A er

listening for a few seconds, he pushed it across the pillow toward Elena,
whispering, "It's your bro."

Elena took the phone from him with a small sigh. "Morning, Jer." Her tone
was only slightly more chipper than Damon's had been.
Jeremy didn't waste a single breath on gree ngs. "I got another message
from Vickie. She wants me to meet her at the entrance to the Santa
Monica Pier at noon."

"That's great!" Elena leaned her upper body over un l she could see the
clock. "It's just past nine, so we s ll have lots of me. Wanna meet us
downstairs for breakfast in, say, half an hour?"

There was a pause, during which she heard her brother and Ma
mu ering in the background.

"We just woke up. Give us forty-five." Without wai ng to find out if she
agreed, he hung up.

Elena handed the receiver back to Damon and explained that they needed
to head to the pier by twelve o'clock.

"Excellent. I wanted to take you down to the beach today, anyway." He

pulled her toward him and kissed her again. "Hmm. Forty-five minutes,
huh? That gives us plenty of me…"

Elena laughed so ly. "Plenty of me for what?"

"This," he smirked. Then he dove under the blankets and tugged them up
over top of both of them.

A er breakfast, the four of them piled back into the rented Prius and made
their way west down to Santa Monica and the beach. It was a bright,
beau ful sunny day—typical LA weather, according to Damon. Elena was
glad she'd had the forethought to shove her only pair of sunglasses into
her bag before she'd le home.

She stared at their surroundings outside the window, grateful she was once
again in the passenger seat beside Damon, and no longer squished in the
back between her brother and Ma . She was sure she wasn't just imaging
that Ma was s ll ac ng kind of weird. He wasn't ignoring her exactly,
but…he definitely seemed a bit standoffish. He was quiet and withdrawn,
and when he did speak it was mostly to Jeremy, limi ng all conversa on
with Damon and herself to only the most pressing topic: finding Vickie.
Elena tried not to be bothered by it, but she had to admit that it stung a
li le, although not enough to put a damper on her high spirits. She felt
happier than she'd been in years. Some of this was definitely due to the
excitement of this trip, but she knew the vast majority of her cheerfulness
had everything to do with Damon.

As it was a weekday, the beach wasn't yet swarming with people, and
Damon found a parking spot not far from the famous Santa Monica Pier.
Elena's eyes flew wide when she stepped out of the car and took it all in.
The en re pier seemed to be covered by a carnival midway: huge roller
coaster, loud colorful stands and smaller rides, and the crowning grace—a
massive Ferris wheel so tall she was sure you could probably see the en re
city of Los Angeles from the top.

"Whoa," she exhaled.

"You're not scared of heights, are you?" Damon asked, coming over to
stand beside her as they both looked up at the rides along the pier..

Elena glanced up at him, smiling. "Nope. You wanna go on that Ferris

wheel?"

"Absolutely." Damon turned to Jeremy. "So where did Vickie say to meet
her?"

Scanning his phone again, Jeremy replied, "She just said by the entrance."
He raised his eyes and glanced around. "Where do ya think she means?"

Damon pointed at the blue and white arched sign at the front of the pier. It
read:

SANTA MONICA
* YACHT HARBOR *
 SPORT FISHING * BOATING
Cafes

"Probably under that."

They walked over to the sign and stopped once they were below it.
Seagulls screamed at each other as they dueled over scraps down on the
sand below.

"It's only eleven-fi een," Elena said, glancing at her phone. "Why don't we
split up for a bit? Jer and Ma can come back at twelve and find Vickie,
and we'll meet you guys back here in about an hour. Sound good?"

"Works for me," Damon said, flashing her a grin as he slid an arm around
her waist.

Jeremy agreed. "Yeah, I'm cool with that. See you guys below this sign in an
hour or so then."

Ma just nodded, his expression unreadable behind his sunglasses as they

parted ways in opposite direc ons.

"Ma doesn't like me much," Damon observed quietly once they were out
of earshot. He reached for Elena's hand and gave it a squeeze, smiling to
show her he wasn't all that concerned about it.

Elena's eyebrows shot up. "That's not true! He's very apprecia ve of you
flying us all out here to look for his sister. I know he is."

Damon chuckled. "That's not what I meant and you know it. I've seen the
worried glances you've been giving him ever since we arrived. And I've also
no ced how aloof he's being with you. You're not used to him giving you
the cold shoulder, are you?"

Elena felt blood rush to her face, and she broke eye contact to gaze over at
the waves crashing rhythmically against the sand.
"I guess not," she finally mumbled. "But I sort of understand why he's,
y'know, sorta weirded out being around us."

"Yeah, I get that, too. But it bothers you, doesn't it?"

"Kind of," Elena admi ed.

Damon was silent for a few moments as they resumed walking along the
boardwalk parallel to the ocean. Then he said, "You think we should maybe
cut down on the PDA around him?"

Dar ng her eyes to meet his, she said, "Oh! Um, no. No. I'm fine with…with
how we are. He'll get over it."

"Good." Damon's lips curved into a so smile.

"Good?"

"Good." He stopped again and put his arms around her, bending his head
to kiss her. "Because I really don't want to."

Elena pressed her body to his and leaned her cheek against his shoulder.
"Me neither," she whispered, her gaze fixed on the crashing waves.

When they returned to the pier, Ma and Jeremy were standing below the
arched sign, both on their phones. There was no sign of Vickie.

"You hear anything from her?" Elena asked hesitantly.

Jeremy was leaning against one of the support posts. He glanced up at the
sound of his sister's voice. "Nope," he replied.

"Well it's only twenty past. She's probably just running late."

"Yeah. Maybe," Ma said. He looked discouraged. "We'll see."

They all stood awkwardly under the sign, Ma and Jeremy s ll religiously
checking their phones every few seconds while Damon and Elena watched
them in concerned silence. They stood a few feet apart, not touching,
although she didn't know if that was a deliberate choice on Damon's part
or not.

Ten more minutes went by. Elena stepped closer to her brother and said,
"You tex ng her again?"

"Duh," Jeremy replied irritably. "What else would I be doing? She's not
answering. Yet."

Elena frowned, but said nothing else.

The four of them waited there, shuffling from foot to foot and growing
more and more frustrated. At last Damon spoke up, "C'mon guys. She's
clearly not gonna show, and we're was ng a beau ful sunny day at the
beach standing here wai ng for her. Let's go grab some food from one of
those booths on the pier and try to have some fun. I'm sure Jeremy will
hear from her soon, all apologe c, and you can arrange another me to
meet."

Ma and Jeremy glanced at each other, then back at Damon and Elena.

"Actually," Ma said, "I think we're gonna try to track down my wayward
father. I looked up the address of one of his buddies out here this morning.
We'll take the bus and meet you guys back at the hotel later."

Elena automa cally opened her mouth to protest. She was responsible for
her brother during this trip; she couldn't just let him go off roaming the city
without her. But before she could get the words out, Jeremy held up his
hand palm forward to silence her.

"I know what you're gonna say, sis. But I'm fine. We're fine. Ma and I'll
stay together, and we'll text you if we find out anything. And if by some
chance we get lost, we'll just call a cab to take us back to the hotel."
Damon reached inside his jacket and pulled out his wallet. Withdrawing
several twen es, he handed them to Ma . "This should take care of your
lunch and cab fare. Skip the bus. It's easier—not to men on safer—just to
cab it."

"Damon, no," Elena protested. "We should go with them."

"And what would that really accomplish, other than to ease your worry?
They don't need us for this, Elena. Ma 's a responsible adult. Let the guys
go play detec ve. We all have phones, so they can reach us any me they
need to."

She bit her lower lip, dar ng her eyes to each of them in turn. Finally she
sighed. "Okay. Jer, promise you'll check in with me at least once an hour?"

Jeremy rolled his eyes at her for what she felt had to be at least the
twen eth me today. "Jesus, Elena. You're not my goddamn mother, you
know."

Ouch, she thought, cringing. Even though she'd tried her best to fill the
hole losing their mother had le over the past two years, she knew he was
right. And she had to admit, he was smart and fairly mature for seventeen.
Of course her dad probably wouldn't approve of them separa ng even for
just a few hours—but maybe this was one li le adventure he didn't need
to know about.

Bracing her hands on her hips, she a empted to look strict. "Dad told you
you had to listen to me, remember?"

The exasperated look Jeremy shot her almost made her wince again, but
she managed to hold her stern expression.

With yet another eye-roll, he spat, "Fine. I'll text ya."

"Great." Elena forced a wide smile. "We'll see you guys back at the hotel
this evening, if we don't have any need to meet up sooner."
Jeremy pulled the brim of his baseball cap lower over his forehead and
stalked away toward the road. With a snort and a shake of his head, Ma
glanced at Elena, said he'd see them later, and then hurried a er her
brother.

Elena turned to Damon. Her brow was creased with concern.

"Don't worry, they'll be fine," Damon reassured her, sliding an arm around
her waist and pulling her against his side. "You're so parental with him. It's
kinda cute, although he clearly hates it." He grinned. "You'll make a great
mom someday."

Her eyes flew wide. That was quite possibly the last thing she'd expected
him to say. "You think?"

He kissed the top of her head. "I'm sure of it."

With a smile, she twisted her head to look up at him. "Now what? Want to
go on some rides?"

"I think we should save that un l the sun is star ng to set. The Santa
Monica Pier gets all lit up at sunset. It gets more crowded then, but in my
opinion, it's worth wai ng for."

"So what would you like to do between now and then? And can it include
swimming in the ocean?"

He lted his head and looked up at the cloudless blue sky as if he was
thinking hard about it. "Hmm. I think that can be arranged. Let's take a
walk down the beach toward Venice, and see if we can find a good place to
get some lunch. Then a swim."

"I thought you weren't supposed to go swimming right a er ea ng?" Elena

laughed.

With a wink, Damon said, "That's just an old wives' tale. You're welcome to
sit on the sand and stay dry if you like, but I intend to jump into those
waves first chance I get."

They con nued walking along the boardwalk, this me heading in the
opposite as before. For almost half an hour they strolled hand in hand, the
beach-side scenery changing over from hotels and expensive-looking
ocean-front condos to brightly colored shops with their wares spread on
tables on the sidewalk and loud music blas ng from the windows.

"This is Venice Beach," Damon said, indica ng the much busier beach area
they were now in.

Before Elena could answer, he pulled her aside as two teenage boys on
skateboards came whizzing by. Although she was shocked, instead of being
annoyed, she laughed. "Guess I need to pay more a en on to what's in
front of me instead of just staring at the stuff we're passing."

"Why don't we get off the boardwalk for a bit? We could head over there
and get something to eat?" Damon said, indica ng a row of stalls with
vendors selling every type of food you could imagine. The intoxica ng
aromas of sizzling meat and vegetables mixed with exo c spices filled her
nostrils, and her stomach rumbled in eager an cipa on.

"Best idea yet," she said.

A er they'd eaten, they changed into their swimsuits at the changing

sta on on the beach, dumped their stuff into a pile on the sand and, hand
in hand, ran laughing into the surf. Elena had taken swimming lessons as a
kid at the local community pool with her brother, so although she wasn't a
strong swimmer, she certainly wasn't afraid of the water. They splashed
and played in the waves un l both were pan ng and covered in goose
bumps. Once Damon realized Elena's narrow body was shaking with chills,
he insisted they both go ashore and dry off.

The sun beat down, glowing hot against her skin and quickly warming her
—it was exactly like Elena had imagined a stereotypical Californian day at
the beach. She reached into her bag and pulled out her bo le of
sunscreen, purchased at the airport when they'd landed as her old bo le
at home had been well past its expiry date. She rubbed the creamy white
lo on all down her legs and up each arm. It smelled of coconut, and
brought to mind childhood memories of ice cream cones with her mom
and Jeremy at the corner store.

As she began to massage another dollop into her shoulders, she felt
Damon's fingers on her arm. "Let me do that for you," he said, taking the
sunscreen bo le from her. His strong hands glided over her skin; they were
warm and firm and just the feel of him touching her brought back vivid
memories which chased away any lingering chill.

They relaxed on the beach, cha ng and dozing intermi ently, for nearly an
hour, but eventually not only was Elena feeling overheated, she was ge ng
restless. She'd never been the kind of girl to just sunbath for hours on end;
she'd rather be up and about doing things. At her urging, they changed
back into their clothes and reversed direc on, strolling back toward the
Santa Monica Pier.

Only a few blocks away from the Pier, Elena suddenly realized she hadn't
heard a peep from her brother or Ma yet. She paused in the shade of a
copse of palm trees and pulled out her phone in curiosity. She found no
texts wai ng from Jeremy, but that didn't really surprise her.

She typed: Did you hear anything from Vick yet?

A few minutes later, her brother replied: No. But we now have an address
to follow up.

Elena relayed this info to Damon, who asked where it was. She texted his
ques on, and got a quick reply: 247 Bianca Cres. Why?

Damon leaned over so he could read her phone. Then he pulled out his
own and plugged in the address. He frowned. "Shit. That's a pre y sketchy
part of town, and it'll be sundown soon. Tell him not to go right now." He
paused, then added, "Say I'll drive us there in the morning."
With a sigh, Elena tapped out the message. "I'd rather they didn't go
running around the city alone anyway. Dad'd kill me if he knew I'd let Jer go
off without us. We have to stay with him tomorrow, Damon. I feel guilty
enough about today."

Damon slid his arm around her shoulder. "They're fine. Tell them to head
back to the hotel and we'll meet them there in a couple hours."

"A couple hours? Why?"

"I s ll haven't taken you on the Ferris Wheel yet. And once they're back at
the hotel, they'll probably gorge themselves at the restaurant and end up
playing World of Warcra in their room all night. Nothing to worry about."

Her brow furrowed as she contemplated his words. "I guess you're right."

"I usually am," he chuckled, bending down and kissing her s ll-pursed lips.

This elicited a small smile, which had been his goal all along.

The view from the top of the Ferris wheel as the se ng sun blazed ombre
layers of purple, pink and orange across both the sky and its mirrored
reflec on in the ocean was possibly the most beau ful thing Elena had
ever seen. But no ma er how stunning the vista was, she found herself
unable to enjoy it fully' she was far too wrapped up in thoughts of the man
in whose arms she was now cuddled.

Her intense feelings for him played on an endless loop through her mind.
Not just how she felt, but how he made her feel. And that it would all too
soon be coming to an end. It was that terrifying thought that distracted her
most from the magnificent sunset—Elena wanted to spend every last
second of this last weekend with Damon focused on him, on them
together.

So instead of spending the en re me on the Ferris wheel looking around

and admiring the view, she kept turning back to him. She nuzzled her nose
into his neck and planted so kisses along his jawline, elici ng a low groan
from Damon. The sound he made sent shivers up her spine and she grew
even more adventurous; snuggling closer, she closed her eyes and pressed
her lips to his.

When they broke apart, Elena found herself caught in his gaze as he stared
at her, the fingers of one hand running gently down her cheek. His
expression was intense, yet so at the same me. She's never had any guy
look at her like that in her en re life, and just for a moment she wondered
if he might possibly feel for her the same way she felt about him.

If only, Elena thought. If only he loved me, too, then maybe we could figure
out some way to make this—us—work. She sighed, so and nearly
inaudible, and quickly kissed him again so he wouldn't glimpse the sadness
she felt sure was in her eyes.

A few minutes later, as they watched the sun flare its dying bright orange
breath before gaudily ex nguishing itself into the Pacific, she laced her
fingers through Damon's and made a wish—a fu le, childish wish, but an
honest one just the same.

Elena wished with everything in her that this weekend never had to end.

A/N Sorry again for the late update. Life has been hec c lately. Between a
grave illness in the family, and a very stubborn muse that just doesn't want
to co-operate, wri ng chapters has been slow work for me. But thank you
so much to those of you who have been pa ent and stuck around! Extra
huge thanks to those who have take the me to leave me reviews. It's so
easy-you just tell me what you think in the li le box below, even if it's just
something simple. Each one makes my day, I swear! I hope the next chapter
comes out of my head much easier (and faster) and hope you all have a
fabulous weekend. xo
23. Chapter 23
Chapter 23

A loud rapping at the hotel room door jolted Damon from an uneasy sleep.
With a so sigh, he sat up. He'd been dreaming of Stefan and Katherine's
betrayal again—a dream that not so long ago plagued him almost every
night, but over the past month or so had barely made an appearance. As
he looked down at the disheveled long brown hair and sun-kissed cheek of
the sleeping girl beside him, he smiled, figuring he had a pre y good idea
why the reoccurring nightmare had at last abated. He couldn't help
wondering why it had resurfaced to torment him last night.

Running his fingers through his hair, he retrieved the fluffy white bathrobe
from the floor that he'd has ly discarded the previous evening, and
shuffled over to answer the door.

It was Jeremy. He looked pale, with dark circles shadowing his eyes. Clearly
the boy hadn't go en much sleep.

At the sight of Damon, Jeremy frowned. "Where's Elena? You guys not up
yet?"

Damon snorted, rolling his eyes. "What was your first clue? Your sister's
s ll out, so maybe try to keep your voice down."

"Well, me for her to wake up then." Jeremy pushed past Damon into the
entranceway, causing Damon to quickly move to block Jeremy's view of the
bed in case Elena wasn't decent.

"Lena! Get your lazy ass ou a bed! We need to go get Vickie," Jeremy
called around him.

Hearing a muffled yawn from behind, Damon looked over his shoulder to
see Elena si ng up and dragging on the matching robe to his own.
"I'm up," she said, her voice full of that just-awoke roughness. Damon
couldn't resist a smirk; she sounded sexy as hell. He hoped her brother
would state his business quickly and then get the hell out of their room so
he could drag Elena back into bed for another half-hour or so.

Jeremy stepped around Damon to face her. "Good."

"What's the big hurry?" Elena asked, s fling another yawn with the back of
her hand.

Squaring his jaw, Jeremy replied, "Get dressed. We need to get going.
Damon said he'd drive."

With a sigh, she relented, "Fine. We'll meet you downstairs in ten minutes.
But our first stop had be er be a drive-through."

"Whatever." With that, Jeremy walked out, leaving the door wide open to
dri slowly closed.

Forty-five minutes later, stomachs full of greasy take-out breakfast, they

pulled up alongside the curb in front of a shabby red-brick three-storey
apartment building. The lawn—if you could call it a lawn—was mostly
comprised of tall weeds and crab-grass, pock-marked here and there by
bare dirt patches. Even the broken bits of wood, rusty bicycle parts, and
garbage strewn about couldn't hide the fact that it hadn't had even the
most basic tending in a very long me. If ever.

Elena frowned as she scanned the property. There was no sign of life, not
even a barking dog or stalking cat. "You sure this is the right place?" she
asked, swiveling in her seat to regard Ma and Jeremy doub ully.

Her brother gave her a grim nod. "It's the address she gave me."

Ma and Jeremy jumped from the car. Elena swung open her door to join
them, but before she could step out, Ma turned back to her and held up a
hand. "You two be er wait here. We won't be long."
Elena darted her eyes worriedly to Damon. He frowned, but then nodded,
so she waved the boys on. "Text or call if you want us to come in," she told
them as they strode up the overgrown remains of the asphalt walkway to
the crumbling front steps.

Jeremy glanced back at her and both boys seemed to be chuckling as they
dragged open the front door. The glass set into it was spider webbed with
cracks and so discolored they disappeared from view the moment it swung
shut behind them.

Elena pulled her door back closed and locked it. She knew it was stupid,
but something about the ac on of locking it in this part of town made her
feel a li le bit safer. She sat with Damon, trying to disguise her anxiety by
listening to the radio and cha ng quietly about The Great Gatsby, but she
grew ever more worried as each addi onal minute crept by without the
guys reappearing. Damon kept telling her to relax, but this morning his
assurances didn't help much. She was fidgety and on edge, staring out the
window at the grubby front door as if willing them to come out with her
mind.

Twenty-five minutes later, the door finally opened, and Elena breathed a
sigh of relief to see Jeremy and Ma emerge from the building. Vickie was
not with them. Elena squinted, trying to read their expressions as they
walked to the curb. "Well?" she asked the moment they climbed into the
backseat.

Ma smiled, the first genuine grin she'd seen on his face in a long me.
"We saw her. I think she's gonna agree to fly home with us tomorrow."

The weight that had been si ng in the pit of Elena's stomach vanished,
and she shot up in her seat with wide eyes. "Awesome! What did she say?
And why didn't she come out with you now?"

With a shrug, Ma replied, "She wants to talk to Dad first, says he's coming
back tonight. I gave her my cell phone so she can reach us." His smile had
fallen away, but he s ll looked hopeful.
"The place was a total dump," Jeremy cut in. "Probably infested with
roaches and rats." He shuddered, looking back at the apartment building
with revulsion. "She needs to get ou a there. We're coming back to get her
tomorrow morning either way, aren't we, Ma ?"

Ma 's lips fla ened to a ght line as he nodded. Elena raised her eyebrows
at the 'either way' comment, but chose not to ques on him on it.
Hopefully one of them would hear from Vickie, and when they returned
tomorrow it would be to pick her up willingly, not to a empt to force her
into agreeing to come home with them.

"How did she look?" Elena asked instead.

Jeremy and Ma glanced at each other.

"She seemed glad to see us," Ma said, his face s ll solemn, "and I think
she was, but I also think she was kinda…faking it. Her good mood, I mean. I
could tell she wasn't happy—not with Dad, not with living in that place, not
with anything, really. I think she'll probably go home with us even if he
tries to talk her into staying." Ma paused, and then added, "Which he'd
be er not."

"I hope not," Elena agreed. She turned in her seat to face the window
again. Damon had kept his opinions to himself so far. He turned to her and
caught her eye, quirking a brow. When she nodded that she was ready to
go, he started the engine.

As they were making their along a busy boulevard heading back toward
their hotel, Elena's stomach rumbled audibly. Damon glanced her way with
a half-smile. "Hungry?"

"I am," Jeremy interjected before his sister could reply.

Ma piped up. "Me, too."

"Okay," Damon said, "what do you guys want to eat, then?"

"Anything is fine," Elena replied. Then her eyes fell on a statue of a huge
cartoon taco on top of a building they were passing, and her belly gurgled
again. She turned back to Damon. "That Mexican place you took me to in
Roanoke was really good. How about Mexican?"

With a quick turn of the wheel, Damon pulled over to the curb and slid into
a parking spot only a few hundred feet past the taco stand. He put the car
in park and turned to look at the three of them, one forearm leaning
against the shoulder of his seatback. "I have an idea."

"Oh yeah? Other than ea ng tacos, you mean?" Jeremy asked sarcas cally,
but Elena noted he smiled as he said it. Her brother's mood had definitely
improved since finally seeing Vickie in person.

Damon ignored him. "How about we grab take-out and I'll drive up by the
Hollywood sign? There's a park below it where we can sit and eat and take
in the view. What do you guys say?'

Elena's face stretched into a wide grin. "That'd be awesome!"

Jeremy and Ma agreed, and a few minutes later, they were back in the car
clutching two large paper-bags of take-out and Damon was programing
their new des na on into the GPS. Mouth-watering aromas filled the
vehicle as they began the slow, winding drive up to the Hollywood Hills
where the famous white-le ered sign stood sen nel over the city.

At last, Damon pulled over to the gravel along a curve in the road, parking
behind a row of similarly-parked vehicles. Tourists with cameras or phones
held high were snapping photos of both the panoramic view of the city
below, and the massive Hollywood sign on the edge of the hill above.

Elena walked over to the barrier to take in the sprawling vista spread out
before them. Smoke rose from dozens of points over the metropolis, heat
waves making the air seem to ripple above the surface of the buildings. Far
in the distance, dapples of sunlight reflected off the surface of the ocean,
and white ridges capped the waves cres ng onto the narrow line of beach
that separated city from sea.
"Wow," she breathed. That single word encompassed everything she was
feeling.

Damon's arm slid around her waist. "Yep."

She swiveled her chin to look up at him. He was gazing at the view, a
wis ul gleam in his eyes, and Elena couldn't help wondering what he was
thinking.

Before she could ask, Damon seemed to re-gather himself, straightening

and turning back toward the road. "The park's over there," he pointed.
"Let's go find a good place to sit and eat!"

They found an empty picnic table in the shade of a tall evergreen, dusted
off the fallen needles from the seats, and sat down to eat. For a while,
none of them spoke, all four chewing though ully as they took in their
surroundings: locals strolling with their dogs, tourists snapping photos,
hawks and smaller birds calling out as they flew overhead from treetop to
treetop. At the play area on the far side of the park children ran around,
alternately shrieking with glee or howling in seeming agony. Elena was
enraptured by it all.

A er lunch, Ma and Jeremy once again opted to walk around and explore
to give Damon and Elena some alone me. Although Ma 's demeanor had
been more upbeat since seeing his sister, it was s ll some small relief for
Elena when the boys strolled away. All she really wanted was to spend as
much me as possible with Damon before they were forced to return to
reality and certain separa on.

Damon gathered up their garbage and deposited it in a nearby trash can

before returned to sit down across from her. They sat there quietly with
their hands clasped in front of them on the wooden table top, Elena's gaze
dancing from the massive white le ers mounted high on the hillside above
them, to the kids playing on the swings and slides, and then dar ng back to
Damon's face again, scanning it for some inkling to what he was thinking
behind those pale blue eyes of his.
Smiling, he reached for her hand and gave it a squeeze. "Shall we go for a
walk, too?"

"Sure." Elena stood as he came around to her side of the table. Damon
took her hand in his, and again she thought how natural it felt, just walking
hand in hand with the guy she loved. Her chest ghtened in another
regre ul pang. Steeling herself, she pushed aside her sadness and tried to
concentrate on the here and now as they made their way back to the road,
turning in the opposite direc on from where she'd seen the boys wander
off.

They walked around the bend and stopped at the wide lookout, sliding into
a gap at the wall between several families of Asian tourists. Raising one
hand to shield her eyes from the sun's glare, Elena looked over the city
sprawled out below them.

For a few moments they just stood there, hip to hip, in silence, Damon's
hand res ng lightly on top of hers on the ledge.

"My father brought us out here on vaca on the summer a er Mom died,"
he said quietly, keeping his gaze fixed on the distant ocean. "My aunt and
uncle used to live here, and we always stayed with them. I think Dad
thought it would be a good distrac on—take our mind off…stuff. You
know?"

Though Elena's father hadn't had either the money or the me to take
them away and distract them, she understood the idea all too well. "Yeah."
She paused, then added, "But it didn't work, did it?"

"Nope. Not in the slightest."

Elena glanced at him again. He s ll wasn't looking at her. She flipped over
the hand that rested beneath his palm and laced her fingers through his.

"All my memories of L.A. were of being here as a family. So being at my

aunt and uncles house, or ea ng at their favorite restaurant, or going to
Disneyland—those were all things we'd done with Mom. Visi ng those
places without her just felt so…" He paused, sighing. "So wrong. Her
absence was more no ceable than ever. It was brutal. I think for Stefan,
too. But Dad just didn't seem to get it."

Elena's squeezed his fingers in understanding. Then her brows narrowed

slightly as something occurred to her. "So does being here now, with
me…?"

At last Damon turned to look her in the eyes. With his free hand, he
pushed a loose strand of hair off her cheek and tucked it behind her ear. A
small smile rose to his lips as he said, "Yes. It makes me miss her. For sure.
But no, I don't regret bringing you here. Not at all. Thanks to you, I'm
making some new, happy memories to help alleviate the old, sad ones."

He leaned in and kissed her, and as he did, a large chunk of her worry
seemed to ebb away.

An hour later, they were back in their room at the hotel. Elena dropped her
bag on the floor, and her eyes came to a rest on her knapsack lying in the
corner, the edge of her laptop just visible through the gap of the half-
closed zipper. Crap! Wasn't she supposed to be working on homework and,
if possible, her column as well while out here? She's promised her dad
she'd keep on top of everything, and was well aware it was a big part of
the reason he'd agreed to let her come.

Sighing, she turned to Damon. "What me did you tell the guys we'd meet
them downstairs to head out for dinner?"

"Two hours. I figured we were in no rush to eat again soon." He smirked,

coming closer and res ng both hands on the curves of her hips. "Why?
What did you have in mind?"

Elena braced her palms against his chest and stepped backward out of his
grasp. "Not that," she said with a chuckle. Seeing Damon's face fall, she
added, "At least not right now. I really should finish up the last of my
homework, like I promised Dad. We've been so busy running around I
haven't even looked at it once since the day before we le ."

He laughed, holding up his hands toward her in submission. "Far be it from

me to distract you from your studying. I'll just head down to the gym and
work out for an hour or so. That enough me for you?"

"Be er give me an hour and a half, okay?"

Damon dragged on a quick-dry t-shirt and a pair of running shorts, then

came over to plant a kiss on Elena as she made herself comfortable on the
bed with her laptop open in front of her. On his way to the door, he said,
"Maybe you'll have me to let me distract you a li le when I get back?"

Elena raised her eyes to meet his, an amused li le grin stretching her lips.
"Count on it."

He winked, and a moment later she heard the click of the door closing
behind him.

Kicking her feet in the air as she lay on her stomach, she looked over the
files she'd been working on earlier in the week. It didn't take long to realize
she was actually further along on her assignment than she'd thought. She
managed to complete the rest of it in only about forty-five minutes, and,
once done, stood up to stretch, wandering over to the window to take a
look outside.

They had a west-facing room, and in the distance Elena could see the blue
line of the ocean. The sun was ge ng lower on the horizon, and the light
over the water had warmed to the pale orange she knew would soon
darken to pink. It brought to mind the sunset she'd watched with Damon
from the Ferris Wheel on the Santa Monica Pier. Though heights tended to
make her nervous, she recalled how safe she'd felt snuggled in the warm
circle of his arms, his breath ckling her ear, his nose buried in her hair.

Her previous melancholy returned in a rush. Tomorrow they were flying

home, and that meant there would be no chance for any other sweet
moments like that one. By the me she got to watch another sunset—
vanishing below the familiar ridge of the mountains, instead of
ex nguishing itself in the sea—she and Damon would be over.

Elena wished more than anything that it didn't have to be so, but she
wasn't deluding herself into thinking this could last. It couldn't. And it
wouldn't. She'd promised she'd tell him if her feelings for him deepened,
and though she'd chosen to delay honoring that promise un l they
returned home, she knew she had to be honest with him. Then that would
be it. End of story. Back to being single, back to focusing on her many
responsibili es and plans for her future. As she really should be, anyway,
she knew. But s ll. God, ending things with him was going to suck so hard!

With a sigh, she walked back to the bed and flopped down on it. Damon
would return in about thirty minutes or so. What was she going to do in
the mean me? She pulled her laptop toward her and opened up Miss
Lonely Love's inbox. There were six new e-mails wai ng; not a lot, but
enough that she could scan them over to see if any seemed like a good fit
for her column.

The first two ques ons were very similar to ones she'd answered in the
recent past, so she filed them away. The third was from a teen wan ng
advice about whether or not she should bring a new boyfriend home to
meet her strict father. Elena copied and pasted this le er into a Word
document and began to type a reply urging the writer to be honest with
both the boyfriend and her parents, and encouraging her to allow them to
meet.

Just as she had finished up a first dra of her response, her phone buzzed
on the nightstand. Elena sat up and reached for it.

There was a new text from Jeremy. It read: Come here.

Her brows narrowed. Why? she typed.

A few seconds later, he replied: Just get over here. And then: Now.
Coming, Elena sent back, frowning. What was going on? Something had
clearly happened. Had they heard from Vickie? Maybe she'd changed her
mind about coming home with them?

Tucking her phone into the pocket of her hoodie, Elena grabbed her key
card and rushed out the door.

Damon whistled so ly to himself as he got off the elevator and strode

down the hall to their room. He'd done weight resistance for thirty
minutes, ran on the treadmill for another thirty, grabbed a quick shower
and now hoped to "distract" Elena with a totally different kind of work out,
although one he felt sure would get both their hearts pumping as much if
not more than the cardio he'd just done in the gym.

As he pulled the door closed behind him, he called, "Oh E-lay-na… me for
a study break."

He got no reply. Walking further into the room, he saw it was empty. He
pulled his phone from his pocket to see if she'd texted him, but there were
no new messages. Huh. He'd been hoping she'd wait for him here, but she
must have finished up, grown bored, and gone down to see what the boys
were up to.

Damon's gaze fell on her laptop si ng open in the middle of their bed.
That's weird, he thought with a small frown. It wasn't like Elena to just
leave it out like that. He sat down on the edge of the ma ress and reached
to close the lid, planning to move it safely over to the dresser for her. The
sudden movement revived the blackened screen.

He hadn't meant to look. Honestly he hadn't. But there it was, right in front
of him. His eyes shot wide; his mouth fell slack in shock.

On the screen was an open document. A le er. And not just any le er. A
le er signed Miss Lonely Love.

No fucking way, he thought at first. It can't be. It's not possible!

As he stared at it, something clicked, nearly audible in his brain, and
suddenly everything—everything!—made sense. His gut dropped as a
deep wave of disappointment rushed over him. It seemed Elena wasn't the
girl he'd believed her to be a er all. She'd been keeping secrets from him,
too.

Just like they all had. Just like his brother.

Just like Katherine.

God! So many lies. Why did everyone always have to deceive him? What
had he ever done to deserve any of this? His stomach roiled, bile rising. He
felt like he was about to puke.

Damon stood, backing away from the bed and the computer, but his eyes
remained fixed on the evidence on the screen. It felt like a fire had ignited
in his chest and was now rolling out in waves over his en re body un l he
was in flames from the top of his head to the ps of his toes. Sweat began
to trickle down his temples and between his shoulder blades.

He was such a fool! Such a massive motherfucking idiot.

Again.

Tearing away his gaze at last, he squeezed his eyes ghtly shut and tried to
breathe, just breathe. Would he never learn his goddamned lesson?

Damon spun on his heels and headed for the door.

A/N Well, seems like the sh*t is about to hit the fan, huh? Sorry again for
the delay. I won't bore you with the painful details, but as I said with my
last A/N, life has go en much more complicated/busy recently, making
finding me to write a lot more difficult. My apologies. I have relooked at
my chapter planning and I think there will be 4 more chapters, give or take.
Oh, and I haven't have much me to proofread this, so if you see errors,
please feel free to PM me and let me know so I can correct. I'm sure there
are a few I missed in my quick scan this morning. Have a great day and
pre y please leave me a review telling me your thoughts? Thanks so much.
Much love to you all. xo
24. Chapter 24
A/N I know I've been away for a long me, and I apologize. There was a
major death in my family, and it hit me so hard my muse abandoned me.
But this year I decided I was going to pick this story up again and get it
finished. Please note: in rewrites, I changed it to present tense, and it
would be super me-consuming to reload all the old chapters changed into
present tense, so I'm not going to. However going forward the tense is
present, not past. I hope you don't find it too jarring. I figured you would
rather have the rest of the story. :) Hope you can forgive the long delay.
There will be 2 more chapters to come, then it will be done.

Chapter 24

S ll shaking her head in incredulous amusement, Elena unlocks the door of

her hotel room. Jeremy had dragged her down to their room just to insist
she make a judgment call about a conflict of opinion in a video game he
and Ma were playing. Leave it to her brother to let her think there was
some big emergency and get her all freaked for nothing.

Boys!

Inside, she finds Damon lying on his back on the unused bed, her suitcase
and various other items that had been strewn over it now on the floor. His
arms are crossed behind his head, his gaze fixed on the ceiling.

"Hey," she says. "I was just down in the guys' room helping them se le
some dumb argument." She trails off, frowning. Damon hasn't looked over
at her; he hasn't even moved. "What's up?" she asks, suddenly wary.

"Sit down, Elena." He gestures toward the other bed, the one they'd
shared the past two nights. As her eyes slide to it, she no ces her laptop
s ll si ng, lid raised, in the middle of the bedspread. Right where she'd
le it.
Oh crap, she thinks. I didn't put it away. Hope he didn't see what I'd been
working on. How could I be so stupid?

The screen is dark, allowing her some small hope he hadn't seen the Miss
Lonely Love le er she'd le open. Cau ously, she perches on the bed
facing him. She tries to hide her moun ng alarm and force her expression
to stay neutral. With her le hand, she reaches behind her and casually
closes the computer.

"Let me tell you a li le story," Damon says in a flat voice. "Feel free to stop
me if you think you might have heard it before."

A so exhala on slips through Elena's parted lips. It isn't quite a sigh, but
it's close. She braces her palms on the edge of the ma ress, straightening
her spine. With no small amount of trepida on, she says, "Okay."

For a few moments, he stays silent, s ll staring straight up. Just as she is
about to ask him what it is that he wants to tell her, he starts in, his tone
controlled and even. "I was with my ex for a li le over two years. She was
pre y much my whole world. I'd never met anyone like her before. I'd
never been in love before. But Katherine wasn't like the other girls I'd
dated. She was in a whole different league, and I fell. Hard. Looking back, it
seems stupid, I guess, but at the me I was over the moon. I had no clue
what she saw in me. I was just happy as hell she saw anything at all."

Elena frowns, wracking her brain. Why does this sound so familiar?

"By last fall, she was basically living with me. My brother Stefan was away
at college, and Dad was always working or schmoozing with colleagues, so
we had the house to ourselves most of the me.

"One day I got called downtown for a par cularly stressful mee ng with
my father, leaving her alone at home. Which wasn't all that unusual. I
didn't even think twice about it. And a er the mee ng, I was pre y upset,
to say the least-"

"Why? What did he say to you?"

Damon waves off her ques on. "Not important. As I was saying, I was
upset. All I wanted was to get back to her. I'd bought a ring a few weeks
earlier, and I decided I was going to propose as soon as I saw her."

Elena sucks in a breath. He was going to propose? It had been that serious?

"I just wanted to get out of my dad's house and start a life with her as far
away from him as possible.

"When I got home, I ran up upstairs to find her. But before I could head to
my room, I heard laughter from the other side of the house. From Stefan's
room."

He pauses for a moment, and she feels her stomach drop away as the
pieces start clicking into place. He finally li s his head to look her in the
eyes. "Do you know what I found, Elena? Can you guess?"

She doesn't reply. She just stares at him in shock.

"No? S ll doesn't ring a bell?"

Words refuse to come. It's like she's frozen in place.

A pause. Then: "I found the love of my life in bed with my brother. But I
think you already know that."

She closes her eyes. She can't stand to look at him. There is no playfulness,
no lust, no affec on whatsoever in his eyes anymore. They are just empty.

His head falls back against the pillow. She remains silent.

A er what feels like hours pass, he speaks up again, so er now. "Why

didn't you tell me? That's the bit I can't quite wrap my head around. What
possible reason could you have for lying to me about this?"

A so sigh slips from her lips. "I…I was gonna tell you. I was, but-"
"You should have told me from the start," he says firmly. "That's why you
wanted me to teach you about sex, wasn't it? So you'd have more
experience to write your column? You were just using me?"

"No! I wasn't using you!" Elena's heart is racing. This can't be happening! "I
did want more experience for my column, that much is true, but I also…I
just wanted to be with you. I s ll do."

He laughs. It's cold and merciless.

"I can't deal with any more people lying to me. I just can't. It's a deal-
breaker. Once we get back, I don't think we should see each other
anymore."

Tears well up in the corners of her eyes. The last thing she wants is to cry in
front of him, but the waterworks are about to start and she doesn't think
she can stop them.

"I'm so sorry." She manages to get those three words out without her voice
breaking, but it is close. Damon is staring at the ceiling again, and she is
relieved, in a way. She doesn't have to see his cold expression. That look
hurts more than any words he could say to her.

"I don't feel much like ea ng," he tells her. "Why don't you go down and
have dinner with the boys? Just charge it to the room."

Elena doesn't feel much like dinner, either, let alone being social, but she
isn't so dumb that she doesn't understand this is his way of asking her to
leave him alone.

So she goes.

Instead of going to her brother and Ma 's room, Elena takes the elevator
down to the lobby, and slips into the ladies' washroom. There is nowhere
else she can think of in the hotel where she can get some privacy to
analyze what just happened. She locks herself in the stall at the far end of
the row.

Damon is JAI.

JAI is Damon.

How much of an idiot is she that she didn't make that connec on? So
much.

She tries to remember the content of JAI's le ers. In the first few, he had
made it abundantly clear that he never wanted to fall in love again, never
wanted to be in a rela onship again. But Elena also recalls the way he'd
looked at her up at the Hollywood sign earlier, and yesterday on the Ferris
Wheel in Santa Monica, and when they'd been walking in Roanoke. And
she has a deep suspicion he had been on the verge of rethinking those
choices.

His a tude in his le ers had improved over me. In his most recent one,
he had said he was considering forgiving his brother. And that he was no
longer in love with his ex.

Katherine, her name is Katherine.

Both of which are huge for him. And the le er before that one? What had
he said?

Oh my God, he'd told Miss LL about me!

Her fingers are shaking. She sits on the toilet seat and grips her shoulders
to s ll them. He'd wri en that he thought she was honest. And that he
trusted her. And now she's gone and blown that fragile trust all to hell. Just
because she had been too proud to share her secret iden ty with him. Or…
maybe she'd just been ashamed? Had she thought he might laugh at her,
that he'd ridicule the idea of someone as naïve as herself offering love
advice?
Closing her eyes, she sighs into the crook of her elbow, long and deep and
full of remorse. Yes, that's exactly it. She'd been ashamed. And now she
has to pay the price for it.

A huge lump forms in her throat. She can barely swallow. It's difficult to
breathe. With a gasp of surrender, her tears begin to flow.

When Elena returns to the hotel room hours later, no lights are on. She can
see well enough to know Damon is under the blankets in the other bed,
the one he'd been lying on earlier. His back is to her.

She had texted her brother from the lobby washroom saying she and
Damon wouldn't be joining them for dinner. A er she'd sat in there
stewing for nearly an hour, she hadn't known what to do. She couldn't go
back up to the room. She wasn't hungry. And she definitely didn't feel like
talking to anyone. So, she'd le the hotel and just started walking

She doesn't really know where she went, but she'd walked for a couple of
hours, stopping only once to sit for a few minutes when she'd spo ed a
bench in a park. She didn't look at her phone, so she has no idea what me
she made back to the hotel. She just knows her leg muscles ache and her
feet are sore.

The clock on the nightstand reads 11:34. It's not even midnight yet, but she
is exhausted. She doesn't change into pajamas. She doesn't even brush her
teeth. She just climbs into the cold, empty bed and huddles beneath the
covers.

Though she feels red, sleep refuses to come. Tossing and turning, never
finding just the right posi on, she grows ever more frustrated. She can see
the outline of Damon's body in the other bed, just visible in the sliver of
moonlight through the curtains. From the sound of his even breathing, he
is deeply asleep. She is jealous. Her mind plays their last conversa on on a
loop, over and over un l she wonders if she might go insane.
The worst part is that, for the first me, she is in love. Not with just any boy
from school, but with someone who seems like he is perfect for her.
Though they'd agreed that they wouldn't fall for each other, Elena fell hard
anyway. And she even suspects there's a chance he might feel the same
way. Well, there was, anyway, before a few hours ago. She went and
screwed it all up by keeping secrets from him.

If only she'd figured out he was JAI before they had crossed the friendship
line.

If only she'd been honest with him about her column from the start.

If only she'd never fallen in love with him.

Gah! If only she had a damn me machine to go back and fix this! But she
doesn't. And she can't.

Tears well up again, and she rolls over to face away from him. Though she
is sure sleep won't come at all, a er a while she cries herself into an
uneasy slumber.

When she wakes the next morning, she can hear the shower running.
Through s cky eyes she sees Damon's bed is empty. With a deep sigh, she
pushes back the covers and swings her legs to the side. They s ll ache from
her long walk last night. And her head is throbbing. It feels like a hangover.
As she remembers all that happened, she supposes it is, just not the kind
you get from over drinking.

No cing she's s ll wearing yesterday's clothing, she quickly changes before

he returns. Then she starts packing her bag, aware they have to leave soon
to get Vickie and then go to the airport. With any luck, Ma 's sister will
agree to come with them, because Elena is not sure she can handle any
more drama on this trip.

She grabs her phone from the night table and checks her messages. There
is a text from Bonnie: So, how's Cali? Everything amazing? Find C yet?
Elena texts back: Yes, going to see her soon. Hope she'll come home with
us. Tell you the rest later.

She knows that last bit will drive her friend crazy, but she can't bear to
explain what's happened yet. And certainly not over text.

A few minutes later, the bathroom door opens and Damon comes into the
room. She is surprised to see he is already fully dressed.

With a bit of hesita on she says, "G'morning."

He glances at her briefly. "Morning." Grabbing his duffle off the floor, he

starts throwing his stuff into it. He doesn't fold anything or organize, just
haphazardly tosses it all in.

Elena knows this is unusual behavior, but she doesn't men on it. She heads
to the bathroom to pee and brush her teeth. Wiping the steam from the
mirror, she is surprises as she catches sight of herself. The girl staring back
is pale, with puffy purple circles under each eye. Her eyes themselves are
ringed with red, sore skin, and her hair hangs limp against her cheeks. She
looks a mess. She feels a mess, too.

When she emerges a few minutes later, his bag is by the door and he's
standing at the window looking out. Without turning to her, he says, "You
ready?"

A lump rises in her throat, and she feels tears rise again. She picks up her
knapsack and suitcase from the bed they'd made love in, takes a last look
around the room where so many memories, both wonderful and horrible,
had been made, and heads for the door.

Damon is quiet on the way back to the apartment where Vickie is staying.
Elena doesn't think her brother or Ma no ce though, as they spend the
drive squabbling over how they plan to convince Vickie to come home with
them.
Her fingers twist in her lap as she stares unseeing out the window, growing
more stressed as each mile passes. Damon won't look at her, and so far has
only spoken to her when absolutely necessary. When they pull up in front
of the run-down building, Elena decides she can't handle wai ng in the car
in tense silence with him. She swings open the door and gets out with
Jeremy and Ma .

They look at her in surprise, but before either can ques on her, she tells
them firmly, "I'm coming with you."

Brow furrowed in curiosity, Jeremy glances through the car window at

Damon, then back at Elena. Thankfully, he doesn't say anything about it.
She assumes he has more important things to worry about right now than
his sister and her boyfriend.

She follows them inside and up the narrow stairwell. They exit on the third
floor, coming to a stop in front of a door with faded green paint. Darker
shapes on the surface show where the number 302 used to sit, before it
broke or was pried off at some point. Music blasts from inside.

Ma steps up and knocks. When no one answers a er a minute, he

pounds again, harder, and calls Vickie's name.

Finally the door opens a crack, and Vickie's face peers out at them. Ma
doesn't wait for her to invite them in; he shoves the door open and walks
inside. With a quick, uncertain glance at each other, Elena and Jeremy
follow.

"Turn it down!" she yells at someone in the other room. A er a moment,

the music goes lower.

"So…?" Ma asks her.

"So what?"

"So are you coming with us?"

Before she can reply, a tall, balding man walks up behind her. "Ma !" he
exclaims. "Great to see ya, buddy!"

Ma freezes, wearing a deer caught in the headlights expression.

Mitch Donovan claps him on the shoulder. "Heard you're in college now.
How's that going?"

Elena and Jeremy exchange glances. Vickie hadn't told them her father
would be here.

"Fine," Ma replies tersely. "We're here to bring Vick home. Mom's

freakin' out." He turns to his sister. "The whole county was searching the
woods for you, you know?"

Vickie's eyes go wide, but she can't help smiling a li le. "Really?"

"You had the en re town worried. Half of them think you're dead in a ditch
somewhere."

"Sorry," she mu ers. "I just had to get out."

Elena can see Ma bi ng his lip, wan ng to tell her off for her
thoughtlessness, but restraining himself. It can wait un l later. Vickie will
probably get reprimanded plenty once she gets home, which Elena
assumes the younger girl is not looking much forward to.

"You packed?" Jeremy asks her.

Vickie looks at Mitch, then back to the rest of them. "Let me talk to Dad
alone for a few minutes, okay?"

Ma sighs. "We'll wait for you out in the hall. Don't be long, okay? We
have a flight to catch."

They step out and Ma and Jeremy take up sen nel, leaning against the
wall on either side of the apartment door. Murmured voices can be heard
from inside for a minute or two, but then the music is turned back up,
obscuring everything else.

Elena glances out the window on the landing of the staircase to ensure
Damon is s ll wai ng out front. She knows no ma er how upset he is with
her he'd never abandon her in a strange city, but seeing he's there makes
her feel a bit be er. Part of her wants to go down to him right now, to try
and talk this through and fix things. But she knows he's not ready for that
conversa on yet, and the last thing she wants is to make things worse.

The door opens and Vickie comes out, a small knapsack over her shoulder.

"That all you've got?" Ma asks her, eyeing it.

She shrugs. "Don't have much out here."

Mitch follows her into the hallway. "You need anything?" he asks. Elena
can't tell if he's asking Vickie, Ma , or both of his kids.

Ma looks his father, his eyes hard. "Nope. We're good."

"O..kay," Mitch replies. "I'll call you, then."

"Whatever." Ma dismisses him, star ng down the stairs.

Vickie gives her dad a last hug. Then they follow him.

The drive to the rental agency is noisy, but all the conversa on comes from
the back seat. Damon drives in silence. He glances over at Elena, but her
face is turned away, watching the city pass outside her window. He
wonders what she's thinking about, is even tempted to reach over and
touch her leg, but he resists. They are over. Not just their 'benefits', but
their friendship, too. He had known the first would end sooner or later, but
now he knows he needs to cut all es. His trust—so rare and fragile, a er
all he's gone through—has been broken.
It might not seem like a big deal to an outsider looking in, what he found
out. But honesty is vital to him. And she knew that, yet con nued to
deceive him. Hell, maybe she knew he was JAI all along and decided to
keep up the ruse for some twisted reason he cannot comprehend.

Right now, he just wants this trip to be over.

When they get to LAX, Damon purchases a cket for Vickie. He asks the
woman at the check in counter to give him the single seat by himself, and
sit the others in the four together he had bought before they le . She
assigns him a window seat five rows behind the others.

Elena doesn't realize this un l they board. She takes her seat, and when
she seems him walk past, she looks confused.

"Where are you going?" she asks.

He waves toward the seats further along. "I'm back here."

"What? Why?"

He can hear the hurt in her voice, but he chooses not to answer, just
con nues along un l he gets to his row, tossing his bag into the overhead
bin and sliding into the seat by the window. He sees Ma take the seat
beside Elena. She had been watching Damon to see where he would end
up, and when Ma sits down, she turns him and says something with a
frown, indica ng back toward Damon. He smiles grimly as he buckles his
seat belt, sure Ma will be happy to hear things are finished between
Elena and himself. As far as he's concerned, Ma is welcome to her.
Although, he knows damn well Elena can and should do much be er than
that guy.

A few minutes later, two girls in their late teens or early twen es take the
seats beside him. The one si ng next to him has long blonde hair and a
pre y, pouty smile. A er she se les in, she turns to him, ba ng her
lashes.
"Hey there. I'm Kim. This here's my BFF, Joey."

He gives her a polite smile. "Damon."

"You flying alone?" Joey asks, leaning forward to look him over. She has
curly red hair, most of which is pinned to the top of her head. Both girls are
wearing low cut tops and skinny jeans, with lots of jewelry.

"No, the rest of my group is up there." He points forward. "Those four."

"Aw, so you're the odd man out?" Kim says. He assumes she thinks the
other four are coupled up.

Always am, he thinks, but he replies, "Not really." He looks them both over
and drops Kim a wink. "I clearly lucked out si ng here." The three of them
are stuck on a plane together for the next several hours. He'd assumed it
would be a boring flight, but since the opportunity has arisen for a li le
entertainment along the way, he figures he might as well take it.

"Aren't they your friends?"

He glances up at Elena again, then returns his a en on to the girls beside

him. "Truth is, I hardly know them."

Joey giggles. "You from L.A.?"

"Nope." Damon se les back in his seat and angles his body toward them.
"So, ladies, why don't we get comfortable, and you can tell me all about
yourselves?"

Elena shi s back and forth in her seat, but she can't seem to get
comfortable. Twice now, Ma has asked her if she's okay.

"I'm fine," she answers, the second me a bit tersely. She's anything but
fine. Though they are several seats behind her, she can overhear snippets
of Damon's conversa on with the two girls beside him, and the flir ng is
making her want to punch something.

Maybe he knows she can hear, and is deliberately trying to drive her nuts?
It's a possibility, she decides. But either way, she doesn't think she can
handle having to listen to them for the en re flight home.

She glances behind her again. He's smiling at them, and the blonde next to
him is laughing at something he's said. She's pre y, Elena thinks. A lot
pre er than me, anyway.

With a sigh, she taps her brother on the shoulder.

He swivels to peer over his seat back at her. "What?"

"Jer, do you have a second pair of headphones or ear buds? Something

noise cancelling?"

Without replying, he turns back around and digs around in his knapsack on
the floor. A moment later, he tosses a set to her.

"Thanks."

"Why's Damon si ng back there?" he asks.

She sees Ma watching them from the corner of her eye, and knows he's
curious, too. With a sigh, she says, "We broke up last night." Then she puts
on the headphones, leans her head against the window and closes her
eyes, not in the least interested in their reac ons.

It's past eleven when Damon walks in the front door of his uncle's house. It
had been an awkward last few hours in the Jeep, and an even more
awkward goodbye at Elena's place. She'd just looked so damn sad as she'd
said goodnight before he drove away. He knows her sadness is no longer
his concern, but a part of him had s ll winced inside knowing he was the
cause of it.
It's dipped back below freezing in Mys c Falls. Right now he is red, cold,
and cranky, and all he wants is to fall into bed and pass out. Possibly with a
shot of two of warming oblivia ng whiskey in his belly.

He climbs the stairs wearily, no ng the empty library as he passes. Zach

must have already gone to bed. That's okay; Damon can talk to him in the
morning. It's not really a conversa on he's up for tonight anyway, as he
knows his uncle won't be impressed. Zach has been good to him, and he
hates to let him down, but Damon knows the me has come to put Mys c
Falls behind him.

A/N 2 Thanks for all your pa ence. I self betaed, so hope you don't find too
many errors. I know my wri ng is a li le rusty a er such a long break.
Pre y please review? xo
25. Chapter 25
Chapter 25

On his way downstairs to get coffee, Damon hears Zach call his name and
makes a detour into the library. "Hey."

Zach sets down his own steaming mug. "Morning. So, how was your trip?"

Damon shrugs.

"Not great?"

"It was okay. Listen, I need to tell you something." He takes a chair near his
uncle..

"Oh yeah? What's that?"

Damon isn't quite sure how to start, but he needs to be certain Zach
understands this is not because of him. "You know I appreciate everything
you've done for me, right?"

His uncle frowns. "Yes."

"Good. Because I really do. You've been there for me when no one else
was, and I'll never forget it. But…I'm ready to move on."

Zach's eyebrows rise. He's quiet for a moment. Then he asks, "You going
home?"

With a small sigh, Damon says, "No. Somewhere new. Maybe New Orleans.
Hear it's a pre y cool city."

"You know anyone there?"

"Nope. That's kind of the point."

Another frown. "I thought you and Stefan were working things out?"

"We're trying. Our presumable reconcilia on is, at best, a work in progress.

But no need to worry. I'll text you both once in a while, so you'll know I'm
s ll kicking."

Zach shakes his head, smiling wryly. "So, when're you thinking?"

"Tomorrow, actually."

Now his uncle is visibly taken aback. "Why the rush?"

Damon shrugs. "It's nothing personal." He gets to his feet and starts
toward the door, but Zach's next ques on brings him to a halt.

"Does this sudden need to hit the road have anything to do with Elena
Gilbert?"

He feels heat flood his cheeks as he turns back. He's neither embarrassed
nor angry, but her name s rs a rush of complex emo ons back to the
surface.

"It's just me for me to go."

His uncle looks him over, and his face fills with compassion. "You sure?" he
asks quietly.

"I'm sure."

At lunch, Elena and Bonnie once again head up to the turret to eat. It's
chilly up here today, as no sun shines through the windows to warm the
small room. Elena shivers, wishing she'd thought to bring her coat up with
her. Through the window, the river roils and churns in the wind. The dark
clouds building on the horizon promise rain.

"So what happened?" Bonnie asks. "You're all Miss Sad Panda. Tell me."
Elena looks down at her hands. "I did something stupid. Well, several
somethings."

"You got Vickie back. That's a win in my book."

"Yeah, I know. But I mean with Damon. I never told him I was Miss Lonely
Love. I know you said I should, but…I hadn't go en around to it yet. And I
was working on my column and Jeremy texted me and it sounded urgent
so I just le . I le my screen open.

She hears Bonnie suck in a breath. "He saw it?"

Elena looks up and meets her eyes. "Yeah. And even worse, he and I have
been corresponding through Miss LL for a couple months now, and neither
of us even knew it!"

"What? You're shi ng me!"

She shakes her head. "I'm not. I got a le er from a guy whose brother had
cheated on him with his girlfriend. I didn't have space in the column, so I
wrote back personally. Then he wrote back to me, and it just kind of
con nued. I can't believe I never put two and two together and figured out
it was Damon, but I didn't. I'm an idiot, Bonnie."

"You're not. This doesn't sound like that big a thing, though. Can't you guys
get past it?" Bonnie gives Elena's hand a squeeze.

"You don't understand. His trust was broken badly by his brother and ex.
Honesty is huge thing for Damon, and we promised each other complete
honesty when we agreed to do the FWB thing. I kept this from him. He
thinks I was just using him to further my column. I said that wasn't true,
that I was with him because I wanted to be with him, but he wouldn't
listen. He won't even talk to me anymore." Tears start trickling down her
cheeks. It feels like crying is all she does anymore.

"Oh honey." Bonnie hugs her.

"That's not even all of it." Elena swipes the moisture from her face.
"There's something else I haven't told him that's even bigger, and I was
going to once we got back, but now I guess there's no point."

"That you're in love with him?" Bonnie asks in a so voice.

Elena meets her eyes once more. "How did you know?"

"Because I'm your best friend. And I've been wai ng for weeks now for you
to figure it out on your own."

"It doesn't ma er now. He's probably packing his bags to leave town as we
speak."

"Listen, Elena? You promised him you'd be honest with him, right?"

Elena nods, sniffling.

"So be honest. Get your ass over there tonight and tell him how you feel.
You owe him that much."

"What if…what if he won't see me?"

"Then write it in a text if you have to! Just tell him."

Write it. Oh my God! She had forgo en her last le er to JAI, the one she'd
mailed from the airport. Crap! Hopefully it wouldn't arrive un l a er she
could talk to Damon in person.

"You're right," she says. "I'll ask my brother to take my shi tonight. and I'll
head to his house as soon as my dad gets home."

"Forget about Jeremy. I'll take your shi tonight. You'll owe me big,
though." Bonnie smiles at her. "And I expect you to tell me how it goes
ASAP."
Damon hasn't even unpacked his bag from Los Angeles. It sits unzipped on
his bed as he crams in more books and clothing.

There's another suitcase around here somewhere, he thinks, kneeling to

look under the bed.

He pauses as he hears footsteps in the hall. A second later there's a knock

on the door.

"Come in," he says, dragging the case out.

"This came in the mail for you," Zach says, tossing a le er on his
nightstand.

Damon looks at it with surprise. "Thanks."

"Guess you'd be er tell her you're leaving, too. No point in sending any
more mail here, right?"

"If you get more, you can just toss them out," Damon says. "It's nothing
important." All that pat advice didn't do him a bit of good, anyway.

"If you say so." His uncle closes the door behind him as he leaves.

Damon looks at the envelope again. Se ng the suitcase aside, he sits on

the edge of the bed and picks it up.

Dear JAI,

I'm SO proud of you! Your le er felt like a huge weight had begun the slow,
painful, yet hopeful process of rolling off. Fixing things with your brother is
definitely the first step to moving on, and I have great faith in your ability
to heal and move forward.

You will find love again—I'm sure of it. It tends to show up when you least
expect it, and it doesn't give a crap whether you want it or not. It just takes
you over. You're helpless to try to fight it.
Personally, I didn't even know what love was for a long me. I'd had a few
schoolgirl crushes, gone on dates, had a boyfriend or two, but, similar to
you before you met your ex, I never loved any of them.

When I first met him, I was intrigued, but I wasn't looking for a
rela onship. Neither was he, as he'd just come out of an ugly break-up. We
became friends, although I knew we had a connec on early on. Our
friendship grew, and along with it our a rac on to one another. We got to
know each other be er, shared private moments with each other that we
wouldn't with anyone else, and before long we became in mate. But s ll,
even then, I refused to consider the possibility of falling in love with him. I
told myself I wasn't at the right place in my life for love. He claimed he
wasn't either.

But I was deceiving myself.

For a long me, I kept up the self-delusion, convincing myself that, though
we cared about each other, it wasn't love, and when the me came for us
to part (which I believed it inevitably would) that I'd be able to let him go.

I was wrong.

Okay, brace yourself. Here comes the sappy part.

When I'm in his arms, I feel like I'd be perfectly happy if me just stopped
and we stayed that way forever. Being with him makes me feel like I'm a
different person, a stronger, happier, more confident person. Don't get me
wrong: I haven't lost myself—I'm s ll me. I'm just a be er version of me.
Loving him has changed me, and no ma er what the future brings, I know
I'll never regret falling for him.

And THIS is what I want for you. I want you to find the kind of love I've
found, because even though it means pu ng your heart out there to
someone else and risk it being handed back to you, or worse, squished, I
truly believe that kind of love is worth it, just to feel the way it embraces
you. It makes you be er for having had it.
Best of luck,

Miss LL

Damon drops the le er back on the nightstand. As his eyes dri to his
overflowing bag, he no ces his ta ered copy of The Great Gatsby s cking
out. Gatsby had let his past keep him from moving on with his life, had let
it control him to the point where it had taken him over and eaten him
alive.

Is he doing the same?

Elena is not Katherine. So why has he been trea ng her like her secret is as
bad as Katherine's betrayal? Maybe she had a good reason for not telling
him about her column? It's not like he'd even let her explain.

And let's not forget she wrote this le er before she knew he was JAI, which
means she is keeping a second secret. This one he gets, though. They'd
promised to end their 'benefits' if either of them started to fall for the
other. Maybe she hadn't wanted it to end yet.

Maybe he is blowing this all out of propor on as an excuse to run from his
own feelings for her?

And maybe, just maybe, the me has come to stop running.

His fingers shake as he overturns the bag and dumps the contents out.

It is s ll day me when Elena knocks on the front door, but the sky is rapidly
darkening. The rain had started just before she le home. She has been
going over what she wants to say to him for hours, and no amount of bad
weather is going to stop her.

Zach answers. He doesn't look surprised to see her. "Evenin' Elena."

Thunder rumbles in the distance, and he glances over her head at the
clouds. "Gonna be a doozy."
"Yeah." She pushes her hood off her hair. "Is Damon here? I won't stay too
long."

"He's in his room packing. You know he's leaving in the morning?"

Elena sighs. "I kinda figured. Can I go up?"

"Go ahead. See if you can talk some sense into him while you're at it."

"I'll do my best," she assures Zach, heading for the stairs.

Her heart is pounding nearly as hard as the rain on the roof as she stands
in front of Damon's bedroom door. I can do it, she tells herself. It's my last
chance.

He pulls the door open a second a er she knocks. The surprised look on his
face tells her he'd been expec ng his uncle.

"Hey," she says, a emp ng a smile.

"What're you doing here?" He wears a peculiar expression, one she's never
seen before. He steps aside so she can come in, giving Elena a nge of
hope he might be willing to listen.

As she closes the door behind her, she no ces a large suitcase against the
wall. He's already ready to go, she thinks. "I need to talk to you before you
leave."

"So talk." He gestures to the chair by the fire. She chooses to remain
standing.

"I spoke to Ma earlier. He said to tell you he and his mom are beyond
grateful for everything you did to help get Vickie back."

He waves this off. "Is that why you stopped by? Because that seems like
something you could have just texted."

Elena bites her lip. "No, there's more."

Arms crossed, he sits on the edge of the bed. "Why don't you start by
explaining why you didn't tell me about your column?"

With a sigh, she admits, "I was…ashamed. I thought you might laugh at the
idea of someone as young and inexperienced as me giving others love
advice."

"I have to admit, it's pre y crazy."

"I know it is! I told my editor that, too, when she asked me to write it. She
said all she cared about is ge ng reader's a en on, that I'd be fine if I just
used common sense. But when the first le er showed up from a girl my
age asking about sex stuff, I knew I wasn't qualified to help her. As I guess
you know, some mes I reply personally, and it didn't seem right to ignore
the poor girls who needed advice. And then I met you, and I liked you, and
one thing just kinda led to another." She pauses, frowning. "I'm really sorry.
I should've told you from the start. I let my insecuri es about my column
get in the way."

He nods. "I guess I get that."

"The only reason I suggested friends with benefits in the first place is
because I convinced myself a real boyfriend would distract me. I've just
been working so hard to earn that scholarship."

"I know."

Another so sigh. "People around here think they know everything about
everyone, but I know be er. This town is full of secrets. I know the mayor
has been sleeping with the high school principal's wife for years, though he
plays golf with her husband every Saturday. I know Ma 's mom would've
had her house repossessed long ago if she didn't do favors for Dr. Fleming. I
know who a bunch of my classmates want to ask them to Prom. I know you
never wanted to risk another rela onship a er what your ex did. And
finally…I..I.." She stops, at last no cing the le er si ng on the night table,
and her heart sinks. He's already read it. Which means he already knows.
The ques on is: does it change anything?
"You what, Elena?" He stands and takes a step closer.

She came here with a speech all prepared, so she decides to just go with it.
"There's something else I haven't told you, but in my defense I only just
figured it out. Some mes stuff just happens, stuff we never intended.
Some of it's horrible, like losing a parent, but some mes…some mes it can
be wonderful. And there's nothing we can do to stop it." She pauses again.
Saying this to his face is so much harder than she expected.

"This might be the last me I ever see you." She takes a deep breath. "I
don't want you to go. I'm…I'm in love with you."

His face so ens. Lightning flashes through the windows, and she thinks she
sees a hint of a smile. In a quiet voice he asks, "What about not wan ng
any distrac ons? And what happens when you leave for school? What
then?"

A warm rush of hope blooms through her. "College is a priority for me for
sure, but…so are you. If we want to be together, we'll find a way to make it
work. If you decide to stay, I promise I'll never lie to you again. I can't
promise a happily ever a er, though. Only me will tell. And I know you've
been hurt, but the way I see it, falling in love is always a risk. You just need
to decide if what we have is worth it."

He stares at her. She can't tell what he's thinking. A er a few more
moments, she whispers, "Damon? Do you want me to go?"

He shakes his head ever so slightly, but s ll doesn't speak.

"I know how hard this must be for you. You don't have to tell me-"

A sharp thunder crack ra les the windows, and they both jump. Before she
can laugh, before she can react at all, Damon closes the space between
them and kisses her, pulling her against him. This me his kisses are not
sweet and gentle; they're passionate and demanding, full of unspoken
emo ons. Elena doesn't mind. She gives it right back to him. This is what
they need now. Sweet and gentle can wait for another me.
Spinning her around, he walks her backward onto his bed and drops on top
of her. They are near fran c in their need for each other, breaking apart
just long enough to pull shirts over heads, to toss his glasses on the side
table. Then they crash right back together. Hands roam. Remaining clothing
is stripped off and tossed aside. Fumbling and gasping, they kiss and
tumble and join together like they haven't seen each other in months,
years even. His thrusts are desperate, nearly panicky, and she clings to him,
rising to meet every one, needing this just as much, if not more, than he
does.

Their intense level of passion cannot be sustained for long. He flips her on
top, but it's too late, he's too close. A minute later he gasps and shudders,
his head falling against the pillow. She rolls to the side, facing him, a small
smile dancing on her lips.

"Holy God!" she pants as thunder rumbles and another flash of lightning
illuminates his face. She reaches up to stroke his sweaty jaw.

Damon chuckles. He covers her hand with his and looks into her eyes. "You
proved me wrong."

She doesn't answer, just stares at him, afraid to doing anything that might
sha er the moment.

"I thought my heart was black and dead, but you proved me wrong."
Damon shakes his head, incredulous. Cupping her face in both hands, he
kisses her so ly.

"I'm all yours."

A/N Thank you SO much to those who were pa ent enough with me to
want to keep reading this fic. I really appreciate all your kind words. Extra
thanks to Siberia21 for looking over this chapter for me. Only an Epilogue
le to go. Please let me know what you think by leaving a review below.
They mean so much to me. Have a great weekend!
26. Epilogue
Epilogue

Five Months Later

Damon makes his way down the stairs and sets his bags by the front door.
"I'm about ready to head out," he calls to his uncle.

Zach comes into the entranceway, a damp dishtowel thrown over one
shoulder. "Hey College Dude. That me already? Remember, you're only
gonna be a few hours away. Don't be a stranger."

Damon smiles. Back in March, he'd applied to get into the English Lit
program, and had been lucky enough to be accepted to the same college
as Elena would be a ending. "You know I'll be back fairly o en. Knowing
Elena, she'll probably want to come visit her family every weekend." He
thrusts out a hand to his uncle. "Thanks again. For everything. Your offer to
stay here really saved my life, you know?"

Zach chuckles. "I dunno about that. But you're always welcome here."
Grabbing his nephew's hand, he pulls him into a hug and claps him on the
back. "I'm happy for ya, buddy. Take care of yourself. And take extra care of
Grayson's daughter, okay? I won't hear the end of it if you piss her off."

Laughing, Damon says, "I'll do my best."

He loads his bags into the back of his Jeep and drives into town to Elena's
house. Her father answers the door. Seeing Damon, Grayson shakes his
head, smiling.

"Morning, Grayson. What's up?" Damon asks. "Where's Elena?"

"Oh, just running around like a chicken with her head cut off, sure she's
forgo en something important." He gestures towards the hallway to his
daughter's room. "See if you can calm her down, would ya?"
Jeremy doesn't appear to be home. Damon assumes he already said his
goodbyes to his sister and is off somewhere with Vickie. The two have
been nearly inseparable for the past several months, much to Elena's
delight.

Her door is wide open. He finds her standing on ptoes in her closet, trying
to reach something on the shelf.

He knocks on the doorjamb, and she whips around, dark ponytail flying.
"Damon! Oh God. Is it me to go already?"

Laughing, he comes over and rests his hands on her waist to give her a
quick kiss. She is so distracted she barely kisses him back. One of her arms
s ll stretches up, pa ng the shelf above her head.

"Can I help you find something?"

"Is my mom's shawl up there in the back? The black knit one I wore to the
Valen nes Party in February?"

He peers into the dimly lit back of the shelf and spots the elusive shawl
crumpled in the corner. "It's at the back. I've got it." Pulling it down, he
brushes some dust off and hands it to her.

"Thanks. I couldn't go without it." She folds it carefully and puts it in a bag
beside the overflowing suitcase on her bed.

"You almost ready?"

She sighs. "I don't know. I've got the feeling I'm s ll forge ng something."
She braces one hand on her hip, her ears sweeping her room.

"Elena, look at me, please."

Pushing flyaway pieces of hair off her forehead, she turns to him. "What?"

"I know an impending freak out when I see one. Relax, babe. We've got
everything under control."
"But-"

He takes a step closer and kisses her again. "If you need something, I'll buy
it for you. If it's something irreplaceable, we'll come back next weekend for
a visit and you can get it then."

Her eyebrows draw in, making ver cal frown lines appear between them.
He can see the argument forming, so he stops her before she can begin.
"Yes, I will buy you things. Yes, I will drive you home when you want to see
your family. No, you're not being an inconvenience. And yes, I love you,
too. Now zip up your suitcase and let's get on the road. Deal?"

Elena can't help the smile that stretches across her face. She throws her
arms around his neck and stares into those mesmerizing blue eyes that she
will see every day now as they start the rest of their lives together.

"Deal."

THE END

A/N Well, at long last it's over. Sorry for the short Epilogue, but to be
honest, that's all I thought was needed to wrap things up (and it was a
rather long story.) Hope you enjoyed reading it. I intend to convert this one
to original fic on too, like I did with "The Sha ered Mirror", so I hope you'll
support me in my endeavor to get this published. I SO appreciate all your
kind words. Please leave a review and let me know what you think of
DMLL. And if you've never le a review before, now is a perfect opportunity
to remedy that! (seriously, I'd REALLY appreciate it.) Wishing you all the
best and hope to stay in touch with many of you.