A TRANSLATION ASSESSMENT OF THE VIETNAMESE VERSION OF

THE SHORT STORY “THE LAST LEAF” BY NGO VINH VIEN (2001) BASED ON
NEWMARK’S MODEL

I. Analysis of Source Text (ST)J

The short story “Chiec La Cuoi Cung” – “The Last Leaf” (introduced in the textbook of Literature 8,
volume I, page 84 – Vietnam Education Publishing House - 2001) translated by translator Ngo
Vinh Vien from the English origin "The Last Leaf" by American writer O. Henry (first published
in 1907 in The Trimmed Lamp and Other Stories). The story initially appreared on October 15,
1905, in the New York World.

“The last leaf” tells about story between Sue, Johnsy and Mr. Behrman. Sue and Johnsy are two
young female painters living in a boarding house. Mr. Behrman was an old painter who also
lived there; All his life he longed to draw a masterpiece but could not do it. That winter, Johnsy
became very ill because of pneumonia. The illness made her despair and thought that when the
last ivy leaf fell, she would die. Sue is extremely worried and tries her best to cure Johnsy but to
no avail. Knowing that crazy thought of Johnsy, old Behrman quietly stayed up all night to draw
ivy leaves. The last leaf that did not fall on the night of the big storm made Johnsy think again,
she hoped and wanted to live. However, old Behrman died of pneumonia after a night of rain and
wind to paint the last leaf on the wall to save Johnsy. Sue quietly comes to Johnsy to tell her
about Behrman's death and the secret of the last leaf.

II. Analysis  of translator’s purpose 

Comparison of the translation and the original short story "The Last Leaf": translator Ngo Vinh
Vien did not cut any part of the original. In general, language usage in translation, does not
change from usage the writer's language: most vernacular, slang is successfully conveyed into

Vietnamese. However, some special languages need to be fixed to match the original author's
intention, those will be discussed further down.

III. Detailed comparison of the translation with the original text

 The Target Text consists of 13 pages, from page 5 to page 17 published in “Tuyen tap truyen
ngan Chiec La Cuoi Cung” - Literature Publishing House.
Meanwhile, the Original Text includes 7 pages, from page 12 to page 18, published in the
collection The Trimmed Lamp and Other Stories.
The translation will be compared with the original text in printed page order. The following are
the main components that will be compared.
Number Target
Text
1 Nhan đề Chiếc Lá Cuối Cùng
2 Toàn truyện Cô, cô ấy, cô ta, bạn, em, nó
3 “Trong một khu nhỏ phía Tây
công viên Washington, phố xá
chạy ngang chạy dọc lung tung
như hóa rồ, rồi đứt quãng ở
những mảnh đất gọi là “quảng
trường”
4 Một nghệ sĩ có lần đã phát hiện
ra là phố này có một khả năng
rất quý.
5 “Họ đã gặp nhau tại bàn ăn
chung của hiệu Delmonico's ở
Phố thứ Tám và thấy những sở
thích của họ về nghệ thuật món
rau diếp xoăn trộn dầu dấm và
kiểu ống tay rộng hợp nhau đến
nỗi kết quả là họ cùng chung
nhau thuê một phòng họa“
6 “Bởi vậy, chẳng bao lâu, giới
nghệ sĩ liền mò tới cái làng
Greenwich cổ kính, kì quặc này,
lùng thuê những phòng có cửa sổ
hướng bắc, đầu hồi kiểu thế kỉ
Source
Text
The tittle The Last Leaf
The whole She
story
“In a little district west of
Washington Square the streets
have run crazy and broken
themselves into small strips
called “places”
An artist once discovered a
valuable possibility in this
street.
“They had met at the table
d'hote of an Eighth street
“Delmonico's,”and found their
tastes in art, chicory salad and
bishop sleeves so congenial that
the joint studio resulted
“So, to quaint old Greenwich
Village the art people soon came
prowling, hunting for north
windows and eighteenth-century
gables and Dutch attics and low
 mười tám. Những buồng xép sát
nóc kiểu Hà Lan và tiền thuê rẻ “
7 Ông viêm phổi không phải là
hạng người được gọi là lịch sự
mã thượng. Một phụ nữ nhỏ bé,
thiếu máu vì những cơn gió hiu
hiu của miền California, đâu có
phải là đối thủ xứng đáng của
tên bợm già có hơi thở dồn dập
và nắm tay đỏ lòm ấy.
8 “Sue đang vẽ phác chiếc quần
cưỡi ngựa đúng mốt và chiếc
kính một mắt trên một nhân vật
chính, một tay chăn bò Ai-đa-
hô, thì bỗng nghe thấy có tiếng
thì thầm cứ nhắc đi nhắc lại
nhiều lần“
9 Chị chẳng cần phải mua thêm
rượu nữa đâu, – Johnsy nói, mắt
vẫn nhìn trân trân ra ngoài cửa
sổ. – Lại một chiếc nữa rụng kìa.
Không, em không muốn ăn cháo
đâu. Còn lại đúng bốn chiếc. Em
muốn thấy chiếc cuối cùng rụng
xuống trước khi trời tối. Đến lúc
đó thì em cũng ra đi thôi!
10 “Cụ kiếm được chút ít bằng cách
ngồi làm mẫu cho các nghệ sĩ trẻ
cùng ở xóm đó, không đủ tiền
thuê nổi một người làm mẫu
chuyên nghiệp“
II. Translation quality assessment
1. Evaluate the translation by the criteria of the translator
rents“
Mr. Pneumonia was not what
you would call a chivalric old
gentleman. A mite of a little
woman with blood thinned by
California zephyrs was hardly
fair game for the red-fisted,
short-breathed old duffer.
“As Sue was sketching a pair of
elegant horseshow riding
trousers and a monocle on the
figure of the hero, an Idaho
cowboy, she heard a low sound,
several times repeated. She went
quickly to the bedside“
“You needn't get any more
wine,” said Johnsy, keeping her
eyes fixed out the window.
“There goes another. No, I don't
want any broth. That leaves just
four. I want to see the last one
fall before it gets dark. Then I'll
go, too.”
“He earned a little by serving as
a model to those young artists in
the colony who could not pay the
price of a professional“
The translation will be evaluated through the analysis of the parts compared in section III.
The successes of this short story translation
The translator has accurately translated many idioms, accurately translating the symbolic and
pragmatic meanings of the original expression: “place (quảng trường), California zephyrs (vì
những cơn gió hiu hiu của miền California), a jew's-harp twang (tiếng đàn môi), swaggered (thản
nhiên), table d'hote (bàn chung)”, run crazy (chạy dọc lung tung như hóa rồ). The vernacular is
well translated. The translator's ability to successfully translate these languages into Vietnamese
demonstrates a high degree of language proficiency and a large vocabulary in Vietnamese.

In the translation, there are a few issues that need to be addressed

It can be seen that the errors that need to be overcome in the translation can be classified into
groups such as errors in grammatical structure, errors in vocabulary, errors in idioms and errors
in printing. Specifically:
Error in grammatical structure: including parts 5,10
- Number 5: The word art is translated individually, making it difficult for readers to understand the
meaning of the whole sentence. “Taste in art” means “Hương vị trong nghệ thuật”

- Number 10: The translator should add the words "những người" in front of this part to avoid
misunderstanding about the object mentioned in the sentence.

Vocabulary errors: including parts 3, 4, 6, 8, 9

- Number 3: The word “district” means “quận” but translator wrote “khu” that misrepresents the extent of
the area.

- Number 4: The translator translates it correctly but it's not good, he should use the sentence “khả năng
đáng giá” instead of “khả năng rất quý”.

- Number 6: the translator adds a punctuation mark in the middle of a sentence, interrupting the meaning
of the original sentence.

- Number 7: The word “chivalric” means “hiệp sĩ” translated as “mã thượng” is not closed to the witer’s
use of language.

- Number 8: The word “hero” means “anh hung” translated as “nhân vật chính” is not literal meaning of
the word that the writer use.
- Number 9: The word “broth” means “canh hầm” or “canh gà” translated as “cháo” is not right.

2. Evaluate the translation by the critics' criteria

The translation, in general, has successfully translated the origin. Translator is experienced professionals
with a large vocabulary, extensive language skills, and a broad cultural awareness. However, translation
errors are inevitable.

3. Assessment of translation as an independent story

As a reader, when I read the translation “Chiec La Cuoi Cung”, I have enjoyed a touching short story,
easy-to-understand language, have deep messages and implications of the original author successfully
work. The translation is close to the original, which has brought tears to my eyes as well as other readers.
I continue to sense not just linguistic values in translation and communication, but also cultural values in
conduct, via the language of the translation. The writing style seems simple but emotional and
enthusiastic and it makes the success of the short story.