Things I Wanted to Hear

Today, I just woke up from a very bad dream wondering we’re everybody goes.
As I walked down the stairs I saw everybody, my family, friends, acquaintances
wearing a white and black clothes. Some of them are crying and some are just
observing. I came near them and saw a casket with full of different flowers
as well as my favorite flower which is Tulips. I can’t feel anything as I walk
near the casket, but I think I already knew who were there. I was not
surprised who I saw inside, it’s me, I am the one inside the casket. So it’s real,
I’m already dead. I saw a vacant chair in front of the casket. I sat. Now, I am
facing them all and suddenly the priest started talking. My love ones keep on
crying as they pray for my soul. My husband Charles is looking good wearing his
white polo and pants while wearing his sunglasses. He may be look tough but I
know deep down inside his breaking. My bunso keeps on embracing his fathers
arms while crying. My family started telling stories about me. They started
flashing back all of my kalokohans in life. Also thanking me for all of the help I
gave them. After them, my nanay nanayan follwed. She was my adviser back
when I was in grade 9. She elaborated how our friendship started as a
teacher and student. She said that she is grateful because we may not see and
talk each day but I never forget to greet her on the special occassions. My
bestfriend was after her. As she started talking, she laugh randomly to break
the ice. I am watching them as she say “These woman inside had a lot of fun in
life. I will be missing her random chikas as well as the food she cooks.
 I will be forever grateful for the years of our friendship. Rest well, my bestie.”
After my bestie’s message, my bunso started to walk infront to get the
microphone. I wasn’t expecting that this young man has the audacity to talk in
front of mycasket. I feel sorry for him because at the young age his mom is gone. I
wasn’t able to join him to every milestone that he will have. “Mom, how are you
there?I know that this is not easy for you to leave. I will be missing you so much. I
will miss how you cook and take care of us. I promise to study hard for my future.
I promise to be brave everyday. I promise to look after my kuya’s and ate’s as well
as dada. Mom, promise me that eventough you are not physically here anymore you
will still hug me till’ I feel asleep. I will miss you, mom. I love you so much.”. I wanted
to hug my bunso but I can’t. I am flattered and sad at the same time with the
messages I’ve heard. And there is still one person, the last and definitely not the
least, my husband. “Hey, bud. I don’t know how and where to start. Andaya mo
naman eh, diba sabi natin na till death do us part, bakit nauna ka? Alam mo
nagpapasalamat ako kasi dumating ka sa buhay ko. You are one of the toughest
person I’ve ever met. We’ve been together for so many years, kasama kitang
nangarap, nasaktan, sumaya, kasama kita sa lahat and I couldn’t picture out
tomorrow without you. Wala nakong kasama mangulit sa mga anak natin. Wala na
yung nanenermon tapos biglang tatawa. Wala na yung biglang magpapansin sakin.
Wala na yung gustong gusto amuyin yung kili kili ko. Wala ng magluluto ng mga
paborito namin. Mamimiss ko kung pano ka tumawa, kung pano mo kami alagaan.
Daya mo naman eh. Ano pa nga bang magagawa ko?! Bud, iguide mo ko, kami kahit
wala kana dito. Tutupadin ko padin lahat ng pangarap natin. Mahal na mahal kita. May
your soul rest in peace.”.
 I know that it is hard for them now that I’m gone. With their messages I’m
quite relieve that at least I did something great while I am living. My presence
will be forever treasured by them. After the prayers and messages, I saw three
people walking near me wearing white clothes. I couldn’t identify them because of
the light, but as they walk closely I could clearly see their faces. It’s my mom, and
grandparents. They look happily in peace. And they told me that are here to fetch
me.

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