INTRODUCTION

Basic table manners re important because they ensure that both gusts and hosts are comfortable at
the table. If you chow good table etiquettes, others will have good impression about you. You will
probably get more dinner invitations and you can make more friends. Observing table manners
shows demonstrates respect to people who have prepared the meal and that they will see that you
are polite and sensitive to the needs of people around you.

Learning Outcomes

Upon the completion of the chapter, you shall be able to:

A. Define and explain the importance of table manners;

B. Express orally your thoughts and feelings about people who do not observe
table manners;
C. Emulate lessons taken from examples when in meals with family and friends.

Activating Prior Knowledge

Have you experienced eating with some friends and one made noise in slurping soup in the
panciteria? Did you laugh? But have you spoken to that friend in private to tell him that what he did
was not proper? Well, in some countries slurping noodles is part of their culture but we have to be
observant in other places.

Learning Objectives

At the end of this lesson, you are expected to:

A. Define table manners;

B. Illustrate and explain how the different table manners must be observed;
C. Express your thoughts/ideas effectively on rules to follow when eating
with fellow guests in an occasion you are invited.
 Presentation of Contents

TABLE MANNERS

Table manners are the rules used while eating, which may also include the use of utensils. Different
cultures observe different rules for table manners. Each family or group sets its own standards for
how strictly these rules are to be used.

12 BASIC RULES OF TABLE MANNERS

1. SIT UP STRAIGHT
 Try not to slouch or lean back on your chair

2. DO NOT SPEAK WITH YOUR MOUTH FULL OF FOOD

No one like to see a ball of masticated meat in your mouth.

3. CHEW QUIETLY AND TRY NOT TO SLURP

Making noises in not only unappetizing and distracting but it can also interrupt the flow of conversation

4. KEEP BITES SMALL

It is smart to keep bite sizes in a moderate forkful

5. EAT AT A LEISURELY PACE

 It shows the host that you want to enjoy the food and the company

6. DON’T WAVE UTENSILS IN THE AIR

7. KEEP YOYR ELBOWS OFF THE TABLE

 Elbows take up table space and can be a danger in knocking plates or glasses.

8. DON’T REACH

Not only it is impolite but there is always the possibility of upsetting glasses or running your sleeve
through someone’s plates or mashed potatoes.

9. DON’T FORGET THE “PLEASE” AND ‘THANK YOU’

These are handy words in most situations but especially vital at the table where common courtesies are
noticed by everyone present.

10.EXCUSE YOURSELF WHEN LEAVING THE TABLE OR ANSWERING A PHONE CALL

If you must leave the table, make your excuses somewhat obvious and appear to be pressing.

11. COMPLIMENT THE COOK/HOST

Even if the food is perfectly awful, say something nice. You don’t need to lie, simply find the
positive side of the burnt food. It is always pleasant to end the meal on a positive note.

12. WIPE YOUR MOUTH WITH YOUR NAPKIN

Ever notice that disgusting smudge on the edge of your glass? This can be avoided by first wiping

your lips with your napkin.

TABLE ETIQUETTE AND MANNERS

OUTCOMES TOPIC OBJECTIVES

 • Define and explain what table etiquette and good manners are

• describe how to use good manners in differing scenarios

• demonstrate examples of good manners while role-playing

• Effectively demonstrate an understanding of the various kinds of social graces/etiquette/good

manners and right conduct appropriate in certain situations

TABLE ETIQUETTE and TABLE MANNERS

Relates to a code of behaviour among people within an organization, group or society which involves knowing
and respecting people’s customs and traditions while observing certain behaviour and actions in an
appropriate manner

The way you eat your food, or the socially acceptable way to eat your food especially when eating a meal
with others. Are the rules of etiquette used while eating, which may include the appropriate use of utensils?
Different culture observes different rules for table manners. Each has its own standard or how strictly these
rules are to be enforced

Etiquette/manners are the conventional rules that regulate social behaviour. They govern being considerate of
others, table manners, correspondence, online behaviour, being a wedding guest, staying overnight outside of
one's home, and getting along with co-workers.

RULES OF TABLE ETIQUETTE AND GOOD MANNERS

(DO’s & DON’Ts)

GETTING STARTED

Some dinner parties are formal and have place cards where the host or hostess wants you to sit. If not, ask if
there are seating preferences. Wait until the host sits before you do. In some cultures, a blessing will be said.
Even if you don’t follow the beliefs of the prayer, show respect and be silent. If the host offers a toast, lift
your glass. It is not necessary to “clink” someone else’s glass.

SEATING ETIQUETTE

Your host may have seating arrangements in mind, so you should allow him to direct you to your seat. As the
host, you should suggest the seating arrangements.

In a restaurant, the guest of honor should sit in the best seat at the table. Usually that is one with the back of
the chair to the wall. Once the guest of honor's seat is determined, the host should sit to her left. Other
people are then offered seats around the table.

The host sits at the head of the table with the hostess at the other end. This works whenever there six, ten,
fourteen or eighteen people. Husbands and wives are never seated next to each other.

If the GOH is a woman, she is seated at the Host’s right and her husband at the Hostess’ right. The second
most important woman is seated across from the GOH, on the host’s left and her husband is seated
accordingly on the hostess’ left

However, when the people is divisible by four, it is not possible for the Hostess to sit at the other end of the
table. In this case the hostess’ moves one place left, with the man sitting at the end of the table, opposite to
the host. This will keep the tradition of seating guest alternately. Husbands and wives are separated.

Exception would be for the engaged couples where they might fielding a lot of questions about engagement
and marriage
For informal dining, the easiest system is to alternate between male and female guests, with the Host and
Hostess on either end of the table

However, if it is a dinner with very close friends and family, it is perfect time to sit married couples and their
kids together
NAPKIN ETIQUETTE

As soon as you sit down, turn to your host or hostess and take a cue for when to begin. Once the host
unfolds his or her napkin, you should remove your napkin from the table or plate, and place it on your lap. If
you are dining out, you should place your napkin in you lap immediately.

Keep your napkin in your lap until you are finished eating. If you must get up at any time during the meal and
plan to return, place the napkin on either side of your plate or place your napkin on the chair. After you are
finished, place your napkin on the table to the left of your plate

At informal meals, place the napkin in your lap immediately upon seating. During formal occasions, before
unfolding the napkin, wait for the hostess to remove her napkin from the table and unfold it in her lap.

Place the napkin in your lap upon seating.

When leaving the table temporarily, put the napkin on your chair.

At the meal's end, fold your napkin and place it to the left of your place setting.

WHEN TO EAT

If you are eating out, you should wait until all the members of your group have been served before picking up
your fork. At a private dinner, observe the host or hostess and pick up your fork when he or she does.
However, if you are at a buffet, you may start when there are others seated at your table.

At a small table of only two to four people, wait until everyone else has been served before starting to eat. At
a formal or business meal, you should either wait until everyone is served to start or begin when the host
asks you to.

RESTING UTENSILS

When you pause to take a sip of your beverage or to speak with someone, rest your utensils in one of the two
following styles:

Continental Style: Place your knife and fork on your plate near the center, slightly angled in an inverted V
and with the tips of the knife and fork pointing toward each other.
American Style: Rest your knife on the top right of your plate (diagonally) with the fork nearby (tines up).
When each course is finished: Place the knife and fork parallel with the handles in the four
o'clock position on the right rim of the plate.
SILVERWARE

One of the most common issues to confuse today’s diners is which utensil to use for each course. A typical
rule of thumb is to start with the utensil that is farthest from your plate and work your way toward the center
of your place setting. If you see the host or hostess doing something different, you may follow his or her
lead. The important thing is to remain as inconspicuous as possible. If you drop a piece of silverware on the
floor, don’t try to pick it up. Ask your server for another. The same with your napkin.

FOOD
For dinners where food is served at the table, the dishes should be passed in a counter-clockwise flow. Never
reach across the table for anything. Instead, ask that condiments be passed from the person closest to the
item. Salt and pepper should be passed together. Always use serving utensils and not your own to lift food
from the serving dish.

EATING
Table manners were designed to keep people from scarfing food down like animals, so learn them before you
eat with others. One of the most important things to keep in mind is that you should never call attention to
yourself by blatantly breaking the rules set by society.

FOOD PASSING ETIQUETTE

Pass to the right (if the item is not being passed to a specific person). One diner either holds the dish as the
next diner takes some food, or he hands it to the person, who then serves herself. Any heavy or awkward
dishes are put on the table with each pass.

SOUP ETIQUETTE
Hold the soupspoon by resting the end of the handle on your middle finger, with your thumb on top. Dip the
spoon sideways at the near edge of the bowl, then skim away from you. Sip from the side of the spoon. To
retrieve the last spoonful of soup, slightly tip the bowl away from you. During service of a formal dinner, the
food is brought to each diner at the table; the server presents the platter or bowl on the diner's left. At a
more casual meal, either the host dishes the food onto guests' plates for them to pass around the table or the
diners help themselves to the food and pass it to others as necessary.

WINE ETIQUETTE
-Hold the glass by the stem or the base
-Smell your wine. Sniff it, taste it and think about it
-Drink from the same position on your wine glass to reduce unsightly mouth marks
-Hold the towards the base when pouring wine
-Fill your glass less than half way and try your dinking equivalent to the people around you
-Offer wine to others before pouring for yourself

ESSENTIAL DINING ETIQUETTE RULES

1. Turn off your cell phone before sitting down. It is rude to talk on your phone or text while in the
company of others.

2. Never talk when you have food in your mouth. That’s just gross. Even someone asks you a question,
wait until you swallow before answering

3. Taste your food before you add salt, pepper, or other seasoning. Doing otherwise may be insulting to
the host or hostess. If you are dining with a prospective employer, the person may perceive you as
someone who acts without knowing the facts.

4. Don’t cut all your food before you begin eating. Cut one or two bites at a time.

5. Never blow on your food. If it is hot, wait a few minutes for it to cool off. Scoop your soup away from
you.
Some foods are meant to be eaten with your fingers. Follow the lead of the host or hostess.

6. If you are drinking from a stemmed glass, hold it by the stem.

7. Break your bread into bite-sized pieces and butter only one bite at a time. Try at least one or two
bites of everything on your plate, unless you are allergic to it.
 8. Compliment the hostess if you like the food, but don’t voice your opinion if you don’t.

9. Use your utensils for eating, not gesturing.

10. Keep your elbows off the table. Rest the hand you are not using in your lap.

11. Eat slowly and pace yourself to finish at the same approximate time as the host or hostess.

12. Avoid burping or making other rude sounds at the table.

13. If you spill something at a restaurant, signal one of the servers to help. If you spill something at a
private dinner party in someone’s home, pick it up and blot the spill. Offer to have it professionally
cleaned if necessary.

14. When you finish eating, leave your utensils on your plate or in your bowl.

15. Never use a toothpick or dental floss at the table.

16. You may reapply your lipstick, but don’t freshen the rest of your makeup at the table. 

AFTER THE MEAL

After you finish eating, partially fold your napkin and place it to the left of your plate. Wait until the host or
hostess signals that the meal is over, you may stand. After the meal is over, don’t eat and run. If nothing is
planned after dinner, stick around for approximately an hour before saying good-bye to the host and thanking
him or her for the dinner. If the event is informal, you may offer to help clean up.

END MEALS ETIQUETTE

At a formal affair, plates are removed by a professional staff. But as most informal meals are served without
help, the hostess clears the plates, often with the help of a guest or two. At a family meal, members clear
their own plates.

CLEARING THE PLATES

If the meal is formal, plates will be removed by the staff. At informal meals, the hostess will probably clear
the plates, possibly with one or two guests helping. At a family meal, members clear their own plates. If the
meal is formal, plates will be removed by the staff. At informal meals, the hostess will probably clear the
plates, possibly with one or two guests helping. At a family meal, members clear their own plates

LEAVING THE DINING ROOM.

To signal dinner is concluded, the hostess catches the eye of the host, lays her napkin on the table, and
suggests that everyone go into another room for coffee and after-dinner drinks. The hostess rises from her
chair.
When it's time to leave, rather than detain one's host with a lengthy good-bye, make the departure brief but
cordial.

PROPER TABLE SETTING

 THREE COMPONENTS OF A PLACE SETTING

DINNERWARE
Plates, cups, bowls, saucers, platters and other serving pieces

FLATWARE
Butter, dinner and steak knives; salad/dessert, dinner fork; soup, dessert and teaspoons.

GLASSWARE
Water goblet, milk and wine glasses,sherbet glass

COVER
Arrangement of a place setting for one person. Allow 20-24” for each cover with the dinner plate in the
middle.

PROPER DINNERWARE PLACEMENT

Dinner Plate: 1” from the table edge
Bread/Butter Plate: Top left above the salad plate
Salad Plate: Lower left above the napkin
Soup Bowl on plate or separate
TYPES OF FLATWARE
Soup spoon
Larger than teaspoon
Salad/dessert fork
Smaller than dinner fork
Butter knife
Shape and size smaller than dinner knife

PROPER FLATWARE PLACEMENT

1 to 1½” from the table edge
Handles are lined up and the utensils are even with the plate

FORKS
Left of the plate
Dessert fork placed above the center of the plate

KNIVES AND SPOONS

Right of the plate
Dessert spoon is sometimes placed above the center of the plate.
Arrange in order of use
Starting at the outside and working toward the center

FORKS
Tines up

KNIVES
Sharp cutting edge toward plate
Spoons
Bowls up
Butter knife
On bread/butter plate
Water goblet
Tip of the knife blade.
Other beverage glasses
Right of goblet, slightly forward and diagonal.
Cup and saucer
Lower right.
Placement of Napkin
Three Places
-Left of the forks
-Center on the dinner plate
-In the water goblet
When removed, should not disturb the flatware

COMMON RULES OF ETIQUETTE

SITTING DOWN
From the left side of your chair.

PASSING FOOD
To the right.

NAPKIN
Place on lap before starting to eat. Cover your mouth and nose if you must cough or sneeze. Leave on your
chair if leaving the table and returning during a meal. Leave to the left of the plate when finished with the
meal.

TABLE SETTING
Deciding which knife, fork, or spoon to use is made easier by the outside-in rule – use utensils on the outside
first and working your way inward. So, if you are served a salad first, use the fork set to the far left of your
plate.
Your water glass is the one above the knife in your place setting and your bread plate is to the left.