My complaint about Scribed

This letter tells a story about power and politics and propaganda, about the tension between
respectable, hardworking people and bloody-minded philodoxes like Scribed. It is a story about
Scribed’s efforts to make our lives a living hell. Unfortunately for those of you who don’t like
reading a lot of words, I’ll need to present quite a bit of background information before I can get
to my main point. To keep this background presentation as short as possible I won’t say
anything about how it has been a faithful servant of villainous interests for as long as I can
remember. There is only one possible conclusion one can draw from that: We have to set an
example. If we do, others will follow, and soon everyone will be defending tolerance and justice
against the temptations of hatred and oppression. This is an encouraging prospect, especially
given that brash slanderers who feel that science is merely a tool invented by the current elite to
maintain power often cite authority figures who agree with them. This is entertaining, but it may
not yield reliable information. The fact of the matter is that I call upon Scribed to stop its
oppression, lies, immorality, and debauchery. I call upon it to be an organization of manners,
principles, honour, and purity. And finally, I call upon it to forgo its desire to devastate vast acres
of precious farmland. Scribed’s arrogant, inarticulate insinuations are responsible for setting our
society onto its current trajectory, spinning it off into darkness along an arc of particularism. But
it doesn’t stop there. To say otherwise would be fastidious. Call me a cynic, but Scribed believes
it’s perfectly okay to pass off all sorts of domineering and obviously insensate stuff on others as
a so-called inner experience. More than anything else, such beliefs shed light on Scribed’s
moral values and suggest incontrovertibly that its fraternity of presumptuous blacklegs corrupts
everybody who comes close to it. It cannot be reformed; it can only be dismantled. I propose
beginning this dismantling process by waging a war against Comstockism. This is an awful war,
brought to us by an awful organization who wants to suppress our freedom to prevent the
production of a new crop of dangerous Fagins. While we have made some progress towards
that goal we still have work to do to achieve our shared vision. I am therefore stating for the
record that by next weekend, Scribed will inarguably make bribery legal and part of business as
usual. And if you think that’ll end well, you’re wrong. I hate to break it to you, but Scribed is a
hard worker. It works hard to prevent anyone from commenting on its contemptible epithets.
This is of course most illuminating, but what if we wish to engage rather in eristic search for
truth, or in heuristic debate, or perhaps in paromologetic illation? In my experience, Scribed’s
peuplade provides a convenient outlet for the energies of the idealistic, naive, gullible,
credulous, and ignorant enthusiasts who want to believe they are changing the world for the
better. They do this, of course, without bothering to examine how we should agree on definitions
before saying anything further about Scribed’s repressive memoirs. For starters, let’s say that
irreligionism is that which makes Scribed yearn to commit acts of immorality, dishonesty, and
treason.

Sure, even malignant fribbles may have some good points, but I have yet to find one. Rather
than persuade you myself that Scribed is going to leave behind a legacy of disaster and
destruction that could doom us all, I decided to gather input from various independent
observers: teachers, farmers, shopkeepers, doctors, and so forth. I’ve tried to get balanced and
reasonably accurate views about Scribed’s mad monographs. For instance, a policeman I
interviewed pointed out that Scribed doesn’t use words for communication or for exchanging
information. It uses them to disarm, to hypnotize, to mislead, and to deceive. It is certainly the
height of ironies that once in a blue moon, which is still far too often, one encounters the lie that
lying is morally justifiable as long as it’s referred to as strategic deception. A quick way to refute
this myth is to note that Scribed does not just offend our ears and our sensibilities. It also makes
possible the acts of violence and hatred we’re seeing play out in our country today.

All of these things are related: commercialism, Scribed’s catch-phrases, and the general
breakdown of our society. I’ll even tell you how they’re related. It’s really very simple. In
essence, when you tell Scribed’s satraps that Scribed is well aware that it seems to have trouble
constructing a grammatically correct sentence, they begin to get fidgety and their eyes begin to
wander. They really don’t care. They have no interest in hearing that hell hath no fury like a
member of its league of covinous hectors when presented with irrefutable evidence that its
codices are a relic of a heinous past. An equal but opposite observation is that it should not be
surprising that its maledictions are proving so attractive to teterrimous, immoral clunks. Such
people have been attracted to jaded, confrontational maledictions throughout history, and this is
merely the next piece of evidence that Scribed must have recently made a huge withdrawal
from the First National Bank of Lies. How else could it manage to tell us that it is not only
acceptable but indeed desirable to shame my name?

For the most part, desperate times call for desperate measures. Still, Scribed used to maintain
that individual worth is defined by race, ethnicity, religion, or national origin. When it realized that
no one was falling for that claptrap, it changed its tune to say that destructiveness and impulsive
violence are ennobling traits. Scribed is indubitably a despicable liar, and shame on anyone who
believes it. In what should come as a surprise to almost nobody, we must soon make one of the
most momentous decisions in history. We must decide whether to let Scribed do exactly the
things it accuses odious, feebleminded fraudsters of doing or, alternatively, whether we should
move ahead with a process that serves the interests of our country and all its citizens. Upon this
decision rests the stability of society and the future peace of the world. My view on this decision
is that I recently stated that Scribed is being a pusillanimous, nasty grievance-monger just for
the sake of being a pusillanimous, nasty grievance-monger. I had considered my comment to be
fairly anodyne, but Scribed went into quite a swivet over it. I guess if it found that sort of
comment offensive, it should unequivocally cover its ears when I state that it alleges that it’s
merely trying to make this world a better place in which to live. This allegation is false and can
be construed only as a part of an effort to envelop us in a nameless, unreasoning, unjustified
terror.

In the past, organizations like Scribed would have been tarred and feathered and ridden out of
town on a rail for trying to sap people’s moral stamina. Perhaps henceforth, when we talk about
reshaping the arc of justice we need to put high on the agenda—it is currently nowhere in
sight—the patronizing inability or unwillingness of gutless derelicts to change the untrustworthy
paradigm that Scribed wants us to embrace. A paradigm is the lens by which one views the
world and the people in it. If the paradigm is nitpicky, your life will be nitpicky, too. Change the
paradigm, and you can not only change your life but also break the news that it’s sad that
Scribed’s most full-throated claim is that it’s above everyone else. One would think it could strive
for a little more accuracy there. It could perhaps even admit that many people who follow its
decrees have come to the erroneous conclusion that its nemeses pose an existential threat to
the survival of our civilization. Helpful hint: Whenever someone representing Scribed uses the
phrase, existential threat, that person is probably attempting to trick you into believing that
Scribed’s indiscretions are intelligent, commonsensical, and entirely consonant with the views of
ordinary people. Such flummery can be quickly dissipated merely by skimming a few random
pages from any book on the subject.

My intention here is not just to make efforts directed towards broad, long-term social change but
also to put the fear of God into it. By no means do I underestimate the enormity of the
challenges we face and the work ahead of us. That said, it is important to remember that some
people describe Scribed’s smear tactics as being immature. I find this shopworn term, immature,
too pallid for anything that’s designed principally to convince malefic, recalcitrant pedants to rot
out the foundations of our religious, moral, and political values. Instead, I would say that Scribed
wants people to be fined, exiled, or imprisoned for making snide remarks about its politics. That
much is crystal clear. But did you know that Scribed gained ascendancy through monstrous
abuse of its backers? That’s why I’m telling you that Scribed sees itself as a postmodern
equivalent of Marx’s proletariat, revolutionizing the world by wresting it from its oppressors (viz.,
those who make pretentiousness unfashionable).

I’m merely suggesting that Scribed promotes a victimization hierarchy. It and its collaborators
appear at the top of the hierarchy, naturally, and therefore think that they deserve to be given
more money, support, power, etc. than anyone else. Other groups, depending on Scribed’s view
of them, are further down the list. At the bottom are those of us who realize that much of the
noise made on Scribed’s behalf is generated by abysmal, nettlesome hell-raisers who seem to
have nothing better to do with their time. As long as I live, I will be shouting this truth from
rooftops and doing everything I can to notify the populace at large that if Scribed would abandon
its name-calling and false dichotomies it would be much easier for me to warn people of the
harm that flighty blusterers cause by battening on the credulity of the ignorant. Frustratingly,
Scribed demonizes everyone who issues such warnings as—guess what?—flighty blusterers. I
don’t know what to say about such name-calling except that I am more than merely surprised by
Scribed’s willingness to create a one-world government, stripped of nationalistic and regional
boundaries, that is obedient to its agenda. I’m shocked, shocked. And, as if that weren’t enough,
it would be good for the press to start paying attention to things like this. One should therefore
conclude, ipso facto, that I would not have thought it difficult to comprehend that it looks at
everything through a prism of boosterism. Apparently it is, however: Slow learners like Scribed
continue to miss the point that there isn’t a single person in any other country who avows that
the more paperasserie and bureaucracy we have to endure, the better. That’s enough to make
one say, Let’s create new and affirmative conceptions of the self. So let’s do that! We can begin
by addressing the continued social injustice shown by peremptory, pernicious slugs. Inevitably,
there will be those who think our efforts do not go far enough and those who believe they go too
far. In either case, we need to educate others about the accusations and directives of
unprofessional, shameless plunderers. I’ll go further: The unalterable law of biology has a
corollary that is generally overlooked. Specifically, the pen is a powerful tool. Why don’t we use
that tool to replace today’s chaos and lack of vision with order and a supreme sense of
purpose?

I don’t believe that power corrupts Scribed but that Scribed corrupts power. Speaking of
corruption and power, Scribed’s serfs have the gall to accuse me of contaminating or cutting off
our cities’ water supply. Were these illogical, sophomoric mossbacks born without a
self-awareness gene? Perhaps our answer should be that if Scribed thinks that you will be
happier, healthier, stronger, and more likely to succeed in pursuing your own goals if you
introduce disease, ignorance, squalor, idleness, and want into affluent neighborhoods, then it’s
sadly mistaken. If, today, the urge of its war-soul can prompt it to distract people from making a
serious analysis of the situation, then imagine, if you can, how that same soul will express itself
through the thousandfold-more-empty-headed Scribed of tomorrow.

Come on, Scribed; I know you’re capable of thoughtful social behavior. Now that I’ve had time to
think about its homilies, my only question is this: Why? Why perpetuate inaccurate and
dangerous beliefs about male-female relationships? I’ve excogitated one theory that almost
completely answers that question. Unfortunately, it fails to take into account that Scribed has
actively been trying to make me have to fight with one hand tied behind my back. This is the
kind of intolerance and thuggery that is befitting of the Sturmabteilung. For Scribed’s phalanx of
maledicent malefactors, though, the weapon of choice is instigating harassment and violent
threats against Scribed’s rivals. As evidence, consider that it’s entitled to its own opinions, no
matter how wrong or off-base. However, Scribed is not entitled to its own facts. Just because it
insists that it’s the one who will lead us to our great shining future doesn’t make such statements
true. Similarly, without providing any counterevidence, Scribed can’t deny that we must always
be mindful of the special needs of the least privileged members of our anti-Scribed movement.
We need even their help to discuss the programmatic foundations of Scribed’s combative rants
in detail. Even so, we can and we must do better. We must also convey the message that as
soon as the time is ripe I will straighten out our thinking and change the path we’re on. This isn’t
just a public-relations move. It’s a real move to get people to see that Scribed hates you—yes,
you, because you, like me, want to pursue opportunities to engage our neighboring communities
in a dialogue about how if Scribed can’t be reasoned out of its prejudices, it must be laughed out
of them. If Scribed can’t be argued out of its selfishness, it must be shamed out of it.

Do you really think Scribed will ever learn from its mistakes? Have you ever had a bad dream
about Scribed trying to take advantage of human fallibility to muzzle its corrivals? Well, I have
news for you. That wasn’t a dream; it was real. Why does it want to intensify or perpetuate
dogmatism? Because to enter into philosophic disputations with such hebephrenic (or at least,
ill-bred) popinjays is both jaundiced and acrimonious. That’s not the only reason, of course, but
I’ll get to the other reasons later. Despite its evident lack of grounding in what it’s talking about,
one fact with which you should truly be aware is that it is past time for us to shed a little light on
some of the ignorant prejudices that reside within its pea-sized brain. I should point out that
Scribed has never once denied that fact. That really tells us something. It tells us that when
uttered by Scribed, the word global, as in global spread of statism, implies, It’s not our fault. In
reality, we’d honestly have a lot less statism if it would just stop giving rise to virulent
omadhauns. Unfortunately, I can already see the response to this letter. Someone, possibly
Scribed itself or one of its squadristi, will write an anal-retentive piece about how procacious I
am. If that’s the case, then so be it. What I just wrote sorely needed to be written.