MARKING SCHEMES

to interpret its
Thisdocumentwaspreparedformakers,reference.Itshouldnotberegardedasasetofmodelanswers.
in the marking process are advised
Candidates ona t"ornrri';;:;r:,;;;;ilinronra
content with care'

Paper 1 (Reading)
Part A (comPulsorY section)
1. B [s7]
itis(an)emperor,stomb//(the)burialcomplexofchina,sfirstemperor,//theplacewherechina,sfirst site // it is
2.
emperor was buried
i"'rra;#;;;iu *unio., /i aichaeological/excavation
, ,;i#';h"..'rrr"v
iz',zoo year-old mystery [17] of the terra-
atmy llthe broken terra-cotta
wafflorls // putting together pieces
fragments/pieces of the terra-cotta
cota warriors [9]
transfonn(ing)/rebuilding/repairinglh"ip:r].,yfragmentsintoa(full.Size)warrior/ireassemble(ing)an
4.
army of *#io'! pilcing togetherierra=-cotta warriors t70l
lterra-cofta) 'l
5. digging a well (for their orchard) t47l
6.

112l
orchard are the same age'
The three women in the persimmon
t61l
a mystery'
The burial complex remains
167l
a complete terra-cotta
It usuallytakes a few hours to piece together
warrior.
together terra-cotta warriors
for 39
iv)* Yang Rongrong has been piecing

7. c [s7]
monochrome l31l ll
8.
a lot during his reign , made great contribution
, did a lot to develop china
9. he achieved/accomplished/did
;;;.1", the country in many aspects t11l

10. B 1111
were exposed to (the dry Xian)
air t8 3l
colors disintegrated into the (dry Xian) air // the colours
11. warriors, lost in a
12. howquickly/fastthepainticolourbeginstocurl/flakeoff/disintegrate/ivibrantpiecesofhistoryare
short period of time t38l
13. experrs t40l
and German
researchers // chinese researchers
14. :"r:::l-,* office in Germany and chinese
ftrartifactfrom the (dry) air // to
(protective) moisture i/ tokeep ivartifact/wet/moist i/ to protect
15. to keep in the
4l
;;r.,p;.;;;.'4ieep/protect the colour 11

16.

laboratory'
Send the artifact to an on-site

Spray the colour with a solution

WraP the artifact in Plastic'

113)
Unearth the artifact'

131
 (i) clay quivers t24) -
(ii) chariot [27]
(iii) shield [24]
(iv) military drum [29]
r 5. D t4e1
'.9.
so much color and artistry has been imprinted on the soil // the ancient
paint(alas) adheres to dirt more readily
than to laquer [28]

(i) Rong/chemists/researchers/scientists/experts/preservation/preservationists
t47)
(ii) create/find/develop/discover/invent t62)
(iii) (re)applying [63]
(iv) binding agent [631

Statement TFNG
i) Only a small portion of the tomb has been excavated. o t64l
ii) The speed of discovering new artifacts is slowing down.
o t68l
iii) In 201 1 , the museum completed the excavation of the central burial mound. o [40]
D t47l
c ts3l

Parasraohs (A-F)
z-J B u0l
4-5 A 165l
6-7 C f.s2l
8-10 D tssl
ll F t60l
t2-13 E [48]
c 1701

Fart Bl

-
j since ancienr rimes // during the ein Dynasty lg2l
_- B I55l
-: turbulent [43]
-
- they have been exposed to its sound since childhood [g5l
-' Zou believes Westerners like the guzheng because it sounds exotic and relaxing t59]
j i) socialacriviry Ujl
ii) sense of accomplishment t37)
iii) artistic expression t4ll
i-

Statement NG
Zou teaches the guzheng.
t83l
The guzheng is Zou's favourite instrument.
t67l
No one else in Zou's family can play the guzheng.
u6l
Famous people have aftended Zou's performances
[51]
JJ.
how to read music
the correct use ofboth hands
how to pluck the strings
how to maintain the instrument
how to sit properly while playing the instrument t42l
34.

Learn how to play the guzheng at the lnternational Academy for Music Arts

The lnternational Academy for Musical Arts is pleased to announce open enrollment for
child(ren) and adult(s) learners. [50]
The academy was set up by zou Lunlun in 2006. [36]
We are located in North Point [57]
What we offer:

Beginner(s) 9420 te3l

I ntermediate (example) $480 (example)
Advance(d) (student) $550 le4l
-And-

Beginners can learn in a group/classroom settingl [621

Number of lessons: 8 (weekl), classes) [43]
Each lesson lasts: 45 min(utes) [41]
Cost: ,$r 680 144l

We also provide lessons through Skype for people who cannot come to the school. [48]

35. (passing an) interview and (taking a music aptitude) test (must include both points to receive I mark) L34l
36,
Leisure and
Cultural Gu Zheng
And Artist
Services Association
Department
Studenl A: Leaming how to play the guzheng sounds great, but I will 3l
a ts
be very busy this year, so a short course would be best.

Student B.' I've been playing the guzheng for many years as a hobby t5 1l
o
Now I want to tum this hobby into a career.

Jt. it questions whether social media is good // it suggests that social media isn't always good ll social media may not
be that great lmay not be as good as we think t3]
38. A [s3]
39. revealing undesirable personal traits (to their peers) [56]
40. (the idea) that Facebook could be a fantastic place for people to strengthen their relationships t33]
41.
Low self- High self-
esteem users esteem users
i) Who uses Facebook less? a t6sl
ii) Who is less likeable on Facebook? o 164)
iii) Who is more likely to make negative comments on Facebook? o [57]
iv) Who receives more responses when posting negative comments? o t58l

t33
42.
Statement T F NG
i) People with low self-esteem feel that Facebook is a safe place to o lsl)
share information about themselves.
ii) It is more difficult to read someone's reaction when you talk to them a t3 6l
face to face than through Facebook.
iii) Parlicipants of the study checked their emails even though they said a l41l
would rather sleep.

43. a negative reaction I53]

44. Facebook is as addictive as cigarettes and alcohol // it is addictive // it is (like) an addiction // users become
addicts l28l
45. i) because they can share things on Facebook // help them improve their fliendship // help them make
(new)
ffiends // help them build up their self-esteem [48]
ii) they bombard their fiiends with negative tidbits about their lives ll they may alienate themselves liom
their fliends ll they may become less likeable 146l

Part B2
46. c [5e]
47. dystopia t88l
48. (i) Rebecca Stead t91l
(ii) crime rate t78l
(iii) freedom // autonomy // adventure l74l
(vi) safer t59l
(v) protected // controlled t45l
49. they want more adventure in their lives // they lack adventure in their lives // the world is less conducive to
adventure ll they have less fieedom now t59]

50. currently in print more than 2.3 million copies // it has produced a third installment in the trilogy // the third
installment is fervently awaited // so many (teens & pre-teens) are reading the Hunger Games t82]
5l . (i) first l24l
(ii) future t21l
(iii) each t68l
(iv) outdoor arena [88]
(v) on television/TV [38]
(vi) wins // lives 1461
52.
Statement F
i) The Hunger Games is the only example of the current popularity in a t84l
dystopian fiction.
ii) lnthe uglies, teenagers conform to a standard prettiness by undergoing a [88]
surgery.
iii) Most participants of the Intemet discussion board are teenagers. t87l
iv) Brave New World and 1984 were written for American school children. o t68l

s3. i) they enjoy the books // the books are exciting/thrilling t5l
ii) Although they are not happy with the endings // the books end in cliff hangers ll they ate longing to find
out what happens next // the ending of the story is like torture to them [39]

t34
54. i) The WhiteMountains I82l
ii) The Maze Runner [81]
iii) The Giver t66l
iv) House of Stairs t63l
55. the interest in dystopian novels for young-adult readers spread very quickly // the book was infectious // it was
popular/widespread/a big hit (among teens/among her classmates) t23l

s7. A t28l
58. to compare/contrast adult and youth dystopian fiction //the differences and similarities between children
dystopia and adult dystopia [9]
59. catastrophe /l apocalypse t69l
60.
Young dystopian fiction [57] Adult dystopian fiction [43]
- equivocate when delivering a moral - 15 grlmmer
- more a myth/fable - shows defect/failure of the protagonist
- less didactic - makes (moral) argument ll argues a point

- endings are happier - extrapolates from the present to show readers

- give a glimmer of hope how terrible things will become if our deplorable
behaviour becomes unchecked
- more reluctant to depict the extinction of hope
within their stories

61 they both warn about the dangers of some current trend (in society) llthey are about an imaginary place or
condition in which everything is bad [69]
62. (children) not having control in the world ll don't run the world tl8l
63. The books are about a world which is filled with hopelessness/doom/bleak future/death/violence. // The books
are scary/fearful/violent. The books may teach children wrong behaviour. t48]
64. c l4e)
65. B 16ll

* This item was deleted.

Note; Figures in square brackets represent the percentage of candidates qwarded a point for the item.

135
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 Paper 3 (Listening and Integrated Skills)

Part A (compulsorY section)

Task I (14 marks)

(l) other
tsll
111l
(2) long

(3)(about)tentotwelvell0.l2(rips)//uptotwelve/12(trip(s))/adozen ull
(4) Ise]

t
Bangkok // Thailand

t45l
(5) SydneY // Australia

124)
(6) (the)/(enough) daYlight

(.1) plenty/a lot/lots of lounge space u2l

[40]
{ (8) moving walkway(s)/walk-way(s)

(9) shop(s) overcrowded/too crowded

l2rl
t40l
(10) not/no post office(s)/postal service(s)

t10l
{ (11) transit lounge trolley(s) (too)/(very) small

(12) better than

tell
[48]
( l3) more greenerY/Plant(s)

l42l
(14)(free)(movie(s))theatre(s)theaters(s)/cinema(s)//canwatchfteemovies

Task 2 (13 marks)

(I 5) Plants 2
Toilets I
Coffee shoP 3
lnternet corner 5
tssl
Children's PlaY area 4

(to a lounge) 112l

( 16) bring(s)/give(s)/add(s) colour(s)/color(s) and lieshness

[11]
(17) toilet(s) on/in/of plane(s) (are) (often) cramped/not spacious/smelly

warm enough t18l

(18) coffee on/in/of plane(s) tastes bad/is lukewarm'/not hot enough/not

s) and tablet(s) l23l

(te) a lot of/some/most people use/have their own device(s)/smartphone(

[28]
tzo t help(s) kid(s) use up (their) energy
1-
1 [4s]
L(ll) kid(s) are/can/may be noisy // kids can make noise

tsel
(22) 1.C
t82l
(23) 2.8
l86l
(24) 3.A
t7 1l
(2s) 4,D

138
 (26) 5.F
[70]
(27) 6.8
LTsl

Task 3 (15 marks)

(28) x
te5l
(2e) ?
ts7)
(30) x
[83]
(31) ./
t85l
(32) ?
176l
(33) ./
t84l
(34) too satty
14sl

li tssl
I
tastY sauce(s)
t2sl
L (36) (reatly)/(a bit)/(very) stringy
u2l
(37) (much) (too)/(very) fishy
I47l
(38) (it's) spicy/hot
164)

f (39) light llnor (soiroo/very) heavy

143l
L f+ol (a bit) tasteless // no raste
[41]
f $t) (very) (icy) cool
t5ll
1
l@2) Refreshing ll makeyou feelrefresh(ed)
t30l

Task 4 (16 marks)

(43) 60Yo /percent/per cent

tTtl
(44) impressed
t24)
(4s) t/a
/quarter
t l0l
(46) fewer/reduce/decrease(ing)/(the) number/no. of fast(-)food
outlet(s)/restaurant(s)ishop(s)
L2el
(47) (increase)(add) more medium(-)price(d) restaurant(s)
t32l
(48) (provide) (a) greater variery offood
[2s]
(4e) Japanese (food)
t56l
(s0) Indian (food)
[43)
(5 1) Middle Eastern
tl2l
(s2) place(s) of worship
I22l
(53) Muslim/Moslem prayer room
t3l
(s4) meditation room
lt4l
139
 [35]
(55) entertainment facilities/facility
t66l
(56) game(s) centre/center
i36l
(57) ar1 gailerY
l21l
(s 8) satisfied // pleased ll happy // contented

the perc.entage of candidales

qwarded apointfor the item'
lVote Figures in square brackets represent
-Pliints
tuithin this { bracket can be in any order'

140
PartB2 (more difficult section)

Task 8 (18 marks)

Task Completion :9 marks

intemational travel was by ship or train

length of time // took a long time

6 weeks to ffavel from London to Hong Kong

hotels / the Dragon Hotel had stables

tourists would hire / use horses and carriages (in Hong Kong)

popular with (the) tourists

tourists liked travelling in rickshaws // rickshaws were always

only i mostly rich people travelled // (more) glamorous / richer

had extra rooms for servants

people travelled with their servants /i hotels / the Dragon Hotel

people carried / had more / a lot of luggage

1920s // the price of a room in

hotel rooms (in the Dragon Hotel) much more expensive in
in today's money compared to $4,200 today
the Dragon fotel in l92I was upp.o*. $10,300

tourists danced after dinner

some tourists went tiger hunting

Mark Allocation Grid

to be awarded for each section of the task'
Note to markers: The table below indicates the number of marks

148
Task 8: Language : 5 marks

Marks
5
correct sentences' Achieved
iuccessnrl manipulation of phrases from the Data File to create grammatically
through a wide variety of changes made to the original texts'
Own Language
. A wide range of accurate sentence structures using own language, with an excellent grasp of more
complex structures'
o Grammar extremely accurate with very occasional slips'
. Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct'
4
correct sentences
Generally successful in adapting phrases fiom the Data File to create grammatically
tense changes, pronoun changes etc'
through iome of: word formation changes,
Own Language
. A range of accurate sentence sffuctures with a grasp of simple and complex Sentences'
o Grammar mainly accurate with occasional common errors that do not affect overall clarity'
r Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct'
3
grammatically correct sentences' This
Sometimes successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create
is done through some of: woid formation changes, tense changes'
pronoun changes etc'
Own Language
o A range of accurate sentence structures with some attempts to use more complex sentences'
not affected'
r Grammatical errors occur in more complex structures but overall clarity
. spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate to convey meaning.

I
grammatically correct sentences
Occasionally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create
to the requirements of his/her own
though more often ,r.o6 o".ui due to failing to change the original texts
text.
Own Language
. are made to use more
Simple sentences are generally accurately constructed. Occasional attempts
complex sentences. Structures used tend to be repetitive in nature.
o Grammatical errors sometimes affect meaning'
r Most common words are spelt conectly, with basic punctuation being accurate'

I
or by chunks taken verbatim
Writing characterized by occasional attempts to adapt language from Data File
from the Data File.
Own Language
. Short simple sentences are generally accurate' Only scattered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences.
o Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
. punctuation mostly accurate'
Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic

0
W;i;irg characterized by being mostly a series of chunks taken verbatim from the Data File'
Own Language
r Short simple sentences may be accurate.
o Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
. punctuation often faulty'
Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic
OR
o Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award '1''
Task 8: Coherence and Organization = 2 marks

Marks Coherence and Organization

2
. It is clearly on topic and congruent with the title'
o Relations between main points and supporting points always clear.
o Strong cohesive ties used to enhance coherence when necessary'
I o Overall coherence oftext is reasonable'
. It is generally on topic and congruent with the title'
. Relations between main points and supporting points generally clear.
o Cohesive ties used generally enhance coherence although these may occasionally be fuzzy.
0 . Overall coherence of text is weak.
. It is mostly off topic and not clearly congruent with the title'
. Supporting details generally not clearly related to main points.
r Cohesive ties used contribute little to the coherence ofthe text'
OR
r Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award 'l''

Task 8: ApproPriacY = 2 marks

Marks APProPriacY
,,

language.
a May demonstrate audience awareness.
a The overall tone is informative and suitable for a travel magazine'

I a Register, tone and style reasonably appropriate to text through some manlpulatlon
or pans or lrara rlle
and through own language.
a The tone may be inconsistent.

0 Little or no evidence of an ability to manipulate reglster, tone or style m oroer [o proquce afl aPPIUPT
for a travel magazine.
Task 9 (18 marks)

Task Completion : 9 marks

9.t Subject line: your article + amendments / changes / comments /problems

9.2 images should not breach copyright // should state source of images 6t7

9.3 encouraged to submit l5-20 images 5/7

9.4 submit images in softcopy / (high resolution) JPEG file 6

9.5 word limit should be 900 words sl7

9.6 no title // title needed + titles not more than 80 characters long 6t7

9.7 check spelling of Thai place names 7

9.8 confirm information is accurate 7

9.9 deadline for submission: 30tr April 5

Examples of acceptable Subject Lines

Changes concerningyour qrticle on plastic surgery holidays

Comments on your article regarding plastic surgery holidays
Amendments for your article

Examples of unacceptable Subject Lines

X Plastic surgery holidays in Thailand

X Some reminders about the article you submitted
X Things to remind you of
X Messagefrom Asia Life Magazine

151
Task 9: Language = 5 marks

sentences' Achieved
ff.t3"1'[,H:'IpllLt'"tl"ronrases from the Data File to create srammaticallv correct
original texts'
,fr.oujf, a wide variety of changes made to the
with an excellent grasp of more
:T lil-"rx*; of accurare sentence srructures using own language,
comPlex structures.
slips'
r Grammar extremely accurate with very occasional
. Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct'

Data File ManiPulation

the Data File to create grammatically correct
sentences
Generally successful in adapting pkases from etc'
pronoun changes
;;;;gh some of: word formatio=nchanges' tense changes'
Own Language
complex sentences'
e A range of accurate sentence structures with a grasp of simple and
do not affect overall clarity'
that
. Grammar mainly accurate with occasionat "o,,Lon errors
. Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct'

sentences' rhis
Hn,il:ffiI3rrlirti?l"oapting phrases from the Data File ,"
".."T.9111T::icallvcorrect
changes, pronoun changes etc'
is done through some of: *oia ro".*ution changes, tense
Own Language
some attempts to use more complex sentences'
o A range of accurate sentence sfi:uctures with
r structures but overall clarity not affected'
Grammatical errors occur in more complex
to convey meanlng'
o Spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate

Data File ManiPulation

ffom.the Di:" Fit:-l:-:':::q:t1::i::i,'"'#:fftiffl)"#:t;
occasionally successtul in adapting ph1a19s
yr:"r?i[:iJ:ffi":#, or.ui duJto failing to crrange the original texrslo the requirements of his/her own
text.
Own Language use more
r constructed' Occasional attempts are made to
Simple sentences are generally accurately
complexSentences.S-tructuresusedtendtoberepetitiveinnature'
o Grammatical errors sometimes affect meaning'
rMostcommonwordsarespeltcorrectly,withbasicpunctuationbeingaccurate.

Data File or bv chunks takenverbatim

'#1l*iXx;l:XijliH occasional anempts to adapt ranguage from
from the Data File.

]"Jrffi:-#f,?""r.n,"n"", are generally accurate. only scanered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences'
o Grammatical errors often affect meaning' accurate'
ones not' with basic punctuation mostly
. Spelling of simple words is correct' more complex

Data File ManiPulation Data File'

writing characterized uy u"ing mostly a series of chunks laken verbatim fromthe
Own Language
r Short simple sentences may be accurate'
o Grammatical errors often affect meaning' faulty'
ones not, with basic punctuation often
. Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex
OR
r be able to award '1'
Not enough evidence in candidate's work to
Task 9: Coherence and Organization
:2 marks

Coherence and Organization

a Overall coherence oftext is very good.

a Relations between main points and supporting points always clear'
a Strong cohesive ties used to enhance coherence when necessary'

a Overall coherence oftext is reasonable.

a Relations between main points and supporting points generally clear.
occasionally be fuzzy '
a cohesive ties used generally enhance coherence although these may

. Overall coherence of text is weak.

o Supporting details generally not clearly related to main points.
. cohesive ties used contribute tittle to the coherence of the email.
OR
o Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award 'l'

Task 9: ApproPriacY = 2 marks

extthroughmanipulationofpartsofDataFileandown
language.
o The overall tone is friendly, polite and business like'
to textthrough some manipulation of parts of Data File
and through own language.
The tone may be inconsistent.
le in order to produce an appropriate text'

Opening and Closing

Appropriate openings: Dear Ms. Lau / Miss Lau / Mrs' Lau

/ Madqm // Hi / Hello // No salutation'
X'tnupp.opriut. opJnirgs Dear Queenie / Queenie Lau / Ms. Queenie Lau
Marty Poon // Yours, Marty Poon //
-
Appropriate endings: Marty Poon // Yours since_rely, Marty Poon // Yours truly,
Regards, Marty Poon // Bestwishes, Marty Poon
/ Mrs. Poon
X Inappropriate endings:-)ro urs faithfully, Marty Poon // Marty // Mn/ Ms.

153
Task 10 (18 marks)

Task ComPletion :9 marks

/
Kevin Hui,s position is trrut some people think that tourism has a negative influence
/
tourists should not be allowed to contact lost tribes

brings in money

can develoP infrastructure

build roads and hosPitals

can pay for things like education (for children)

canusemoneyforgovernmentprojects/toprovidecleanwater(inpoorerareas)

more tourism means more jobs

(e'g' language)
can learn from tourists // get education from tourists

exchange ofpractical ideas ll share ideas with tourists

help create village webPage

maintain traditions // keeps the culfure alive

@einThailandwhichhadalmostdisappearedandnowpopularagain
because oftourism
about traditions
local stories published so now people can learn

Mark Allocation Grid

number of marks to be awarded for each section of the task'
Note to msrkers: The table below indicutes the

t54
Task Language = 5 marks

Marks Language
5 Data File Manipulation
Successful manipulation of phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct sentences- Achieved
through a wide variety of changes made to the original texts'
Own Language
r A wide range of accurate sentence structures using own language, with an excellent grasp of more
complex structures.
r Grammar extremely accurate with very occasional slips.
o Spelling and punctuation are mostly colrect.

4 Data File Manipulation

Generally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct sentences
through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes etc.
Own Language
o A range of accurate sentence structures with agrasp of simple and complex sentences.
r Grammar mainly accurate with occasional common errors that do not affect overall clarity.
. Spelling and punctuation are mostly correct.

3 Data File Manipulation

Sometimes succissful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct sentences' This
is done through some of: word formation changes, tense changes, pronoun changes etc.
Own Language
o A range of accurate sentence structures with some attempts to use more complex sentences.
r Grammatical errors occur in more complex structures but overall clarity not affected.
. Spelling and punctuation are sufficiently accurate to convey meaning.
2 Data File Manipulation
Occasionally successful in adapting phrases from the Data File to create grammatically correct sentences
though mori often errors occur due to failing to change the original texts to the requirements of his/her own
text.
Own Language
o Simple sentences are generally accurately constructed. Occasional attempts are made to use more
complex sentences. Structures used tend to be repetitive in nature.
r Grammatical errors sometimes affect meaning.
r Most common words are spelt correctly, with basic punctuation being accurate.

I Data File Manipulation

Writing characterized by occasional attempts to adapt language from Data File or by chunks takenverbatim
from the Data File.
Own Language
r Short simple sentences are generally accurate. Only scattered attempts at longer, more complex
sentences.
r Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
o Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation mostly accurate.

0 Data File Manipulation

Writing characterized by being mostly a series of chunks taken verbatim ftom the Data File.
Own Language
r Short simple sentences may be accurate.
o Grammatical errors often affect meaning.
o Spelling of simple words is correct, more complex ones not, with basic punctuation often faulty,
OR
o Not enough evidence in candidate's work to be able to award 'l'.
 l0: Coherence and Organization = 2 marks
."n"" and 0rganization

O**ll *h.rAce of text is very good'

supporting points always clear'
Relations between main points and
when necessary'
i,.org cohesive ties used to enhance coherence
Gt"ll ""l*"*ce of text is reasonable'
Relationsbetweenmainpointsandsupportingpointsgenerallyclear. onailv e fuzzv
::fi :",il ;::x",,:: ffi:;r;;;;ffi .-,;.; artho ugh th
e mave s o cc as i b

; Or*tlt *h"rence of text is weak'

. Supporting details generally not clearly *t:td::-T1tli::lt:;
o Cohesive ties used contribute little to the coherence ofthe text'
OR
. work to be able to award ' 1'
Not enough evidence in candidate's

the overarl
considered to be detrimental to
of KevinHui,s position should be
Note: An over_lengthy summary ;;;;;;,t"rlnin. cor,"."nce and organization mark'
;tJ;be taken t.i"
coherence of the editoriJ;

arts of Data File and own

language.
appropriate.to presenting an argument'
The overall tone is persuasive i
il; ;;". is quite foimal and suited to an editorial'
t of Parts of Data File
roPriate to text through some ma ;i;uluti*
and through own language'
The tone fnaY be inconsistent'
oduce an aPProPriate text'