Write a four-paragraph cause essay analyzing reasons people prefer being

young to being old.

Last year when practicing exercise at the park, I usually saw an old man with a
long stick in his hand. He sat on a bench opposite the playground and observed some
youngsters playing every day. I noticed that his eyes were hopeful and happy when
seeing them. I was so curious and asked myself: “why does he always choose that
position?”. One time I sat next to him, talked to him, and asked him the reason for this.
He both looked at the young people in the playground and told answered me: “Being
young is really good.” Like the old man in my story, many people in the world also prefer
being young to being old. The causes of this are stronger physical health and fewer
responsibilities. (Very good introduction)

It is evident that when people are young, their physical well-being is much
stronger, which brings to the young many benefits. As can be seen that some professions
need people /staffs/employees with physical strength, and people can only pursue them
when they are young. For example, both old and young people love football, and many of
them wish that they can become professional football players. However, if people want to
become football players, they have to experience a serious training process. In order to
follow dreams, people need to be young and have strong physical well-being. It means
that if people are old, they do are not have healthy enough health to become football
players. Finally, the young will recover much faster than the old when being attacked by
a disease because of physical strength. In addition, the young do not have as many
serious symptoms as the old when being infected by viruses. For instance, many people
in the world have been harmed by the contagious Coronavirus recently. However, many
medical professionals have shown that this virus is more dangerous for the old, and in
reality, older people with weak immunity systems take have taken /occupied the major
part of dead cases because of Covid 19. Youngsters who get the coronavirus have less
serious symptoms than old people, and they can leave treatment areas earlier. Generally
speaking, people prefer being young to being old because of stronger fitness.

Being young means that people will have fewer responsibilities and why is another
reason why people don’t like their old ages. When people are young, they are single and
free, which means they can do whatever they want with fewer burdens. Conversely, when
people are old, they have many duties, and it is difficult for them to follow their dreams.
For instance, my neighbor is an officer at a state company with a stable income each
month. He has been working there for more than twenty years. His salary is not really
high, but it helps him support his family. He wants to found his own company because he
is bored with his current work, but he cannot do it because there are many responsibilities
on his shoulders. His parents are weak;, his wife is only a housewife, and his two sons are
studying at international universities with high tuition fees. If he wants to run his own
business, he has to apply for a loan at a bank, and he has to accept the loss in some years.
As a result, he gives up his intention and continues being an ordinary officer. To sum up,
young people do not have as many responsibilities as the old, and they can execute their
plans more easily.
In conclusion, people prefer being young to being old because of physical strength
and fewer duties. Therefore, when people are young, they should try to keep themselves
healthy and follow their dreams. Consequently, when they get older, they will not regret
anything and enjoy their lives in old age.

Marking sheet
Criteria Feedback
Essay Forms (3)3.0ms
- Introduction (hook, The essay is well-developed.
background, thesis)
- Body paragraphs
- Conclusion

Essay Development (4)3.7ms

- Unity (1)1.0
- Coherence (1)0.7 The topic sentence in the 2nd body paragraph
doesn’t indicate the cause-effect relationship.
- Ideas (2)2.0

Language (3)2.3ms
- Range of vocabulary
- Grammar
- Spelling, punctuations

Total mark
9 out of 10