ANXIETY

RELIEF GUIDE

What to do when
you feel
overwhelmed
Introduction
When anxiety seizes me I get lost, helpless, desperate
and with a big ‘Help’ screaming inside me.

This is how the idea for this guide came.

Take this guide as a first-aid kit. Use it when there is

no one around you or they are too busy for you.

When you need help and that is not available

immediately, help yourself.

Take 30 minutes, go to a quiet place or somewhere

where no one can interrupt you. It can be your office,
your car, a nearby cafe, the park, even the toilet.

Take a pen and a pad and write the answers to these

questions.
THE ANXIETY STAGES
I have identified 5 crucial stages of
anxiety.

The Bait Stage

The Sherlock Holmes Stage
The Physical Stage
The Self Condemnation stage
The Yarn Stage

You may not experience all of them, and

the order in which they appear may
differ.
This guide will ask you the right
questions to challenge your
anxious mind. Be honest and
patient. If you feel you have little
to say, then wait a bit. Try to resist
the urge of skipping to next
question. Remember that these
questions may give you answers
you never thought were there.

When you are anxious, you

need an internal coach.
The Bait Stage
Thoughts arise in the form of
‘suggestions’ and you think these are
true. You bite the bait and you are
hooked.

Yeah, my idea sucks indeed.

Questions

1. Why do you agree with these

thoughts?
2. Why do you think are
reasonable enough to believe
they deserve your attention?
3. What thoughts affect you the
most? Why? (Please answer
why).
4. What emotions these thoughts
generate?
Write your reflections to the
questions above

1.

2.

3.

4.
No matter what thoughts you have,
they are not real, only you are.

The past or the future can seem so

vivid, so scary.

But you are HERE now, you are

following this guide.

You are here, away from the past,

away from tomorrow.
The Sherlock
Holmes Stage
Once the thoughts hook you, you
become a detective. You search
for ‘evidence’, small clues that tell
you the thought you had is true.
Questions

1. How do you know that the piece of

‘evidence’ you found makes justice
to your thought?
2. How finding this evidence makes
you feel?
3. How could you test this ‘evidence’?

For example, you have these thoughts:

the boss is upset, and it’s your fault. ‘I
must have done something wrong'.

You look for evidence: ‘he is too quiet, he

doesn’t look me in the eye, his face
expressions shows that something is
wrong’. He might be upset, or he might
be just preoccupied with a personal
matter.
Let's get busy. Write your answers
below.

1.

2.

3.
You don’t have access to anyone’s
thoughts unless they reveal those
to you.

The only way you could test if

someone is upset because of you
is to ASK!
Have I done
something wrong?
The Stage of Physical
Symptoms

Your body is the most affected by

anxiety. Your heart is racing, your
palms are sweaty, you may be dizzy or
shaking.

Breathe in for three seconds, hold for

four, and then breathe out for five.

Three, four, five.

Do this until you feel a change in your

body. The dizziness may have calmed
down or the shaking may have
dissapeared.
Exercise 1

Imagine that you have a magic tent,

invisible like Harry Potter’s cloak.

No one can enter here.

No one can see you.

There is no time, no yesterday, no tomorrow.

Nothing can affect you or harm you. It is warm

inside, peaceful, welcoming like the arms of a
mother.

How do you feel?

NAME YOUR EMOTIONS. It is so powerful!

Use The Wheel of Emotions

Start at the center, pick a word, and use the

corresponding terms to define your feelings. Your
own word wheel will help you interpret your
emotions.
Exercise 2

Imagine that your anxiety

is like water in a bottle.

Open up the lid and let the liquid

spill. Towards the end, watch how
every drop trickles down until the
bottle is empty.

How is the beating of your heart

now? Tell her something to
reassure your heart.
The Self-Damning
Stage
Self-criticism is
present in all the
previous stages, but
in Stage Four self-
criticism is no longer
subtle. It is direct and
violent:
‘I am stupid.’
‘I am worthless.’
‘Nobody likes me’.
‘I am not competent
enough.’
Write the negative thoughts you have
about yourself, about your actions,
about your achievements.
Write everything.
Throw them down.
I am so dumb. No
one trusts me.

Read out loud those sentences.

Imagine that you are walking on a
street and you hear a woman telling
these things (what you wrote above) to
another woman.

She is now alone. You invite her to a

coffee.

What would you tell that person who

maybe is now sad, hurt, depressed?
How would you encourage her?
 Write these
words of support
on 10 sticky
notes.

Stick them all around you so you can see

something encouraging everytime you
experience self-damning thoughts.

If you are too embarassed to stick things

at work set up reminders on your phone
like 'You are good enough. Your work is
amazing.

Use the second person because many

times you talk to yourself like this : 'You
are, you cannot, you won't etc.'
The Yarn Stage
This is a difficult stage where thoughts
are racing at a thousand miles an hour.

You may feel sad, afraid, discouraged.

Your mind is like a tangled yarn where

thoughts make little sense and you
feel overwhelmed.

You may feel like mentally drowning

or choking.
1. What is the theme of your
thoughts? What do they have in
common? Do they all refer to
past, present or future?
2. Choose the most disturbing
thought. Write it. What are the
thoughts around that thought?
 Complete the figure below.

Thought 1

Thought 2
Main thought Thought 6

Thought 3 Thought 5

Thought 4

Look at this figure.

Look at the thoughts you wrote.
On a scale from 1 to 10, how powerful
are these thoughts now?
Questions

1. If anxiety was a person, what

would you tell her now?
2. What would you tell your inner
child who is now anxious?
3. What would you like to hear from
the person who wants to help you
during your anxiety episode?
Write your reflections to the
questions above

1.

2.

3.
The End

Thank you for using this guide.

Please don't forget that no matter how

difficult is your struggle, there is hope.

You are far more than your mind tells

you.

Living with anxiety is an ongoing battle

but you can still have joy and be strong
through the ups and downs.