Conflict resolution is one of the most essential skills a manager can learn.

Conflicts are
inevitable and they form an integral part in the workplace. All kinds of workplaces are filled with
different people who might have different ideas or ways of perceiving things and therefore it is
only normal for conflicts to arise between them. It is understandable for a manager or an
employee in an organization to desire smooth operation of workflow within the workplace but it
is always wise to be prepared to face conflicts and take necessary measures to resolve them. It is
often seen that many employees are anxious to face or resolve conflicts and wish to work in a
laid back environment and some might feel that conflicts are signs of an unhealthy workplace.
However, one should always remember that not all conflicts are negative and some conflicts
might have a healthy impact on the growth of employees. It could mean that the workers believe
in their ideas for the development of the company and are willing to raise their voice to
implement them. But these conflicts should not go to extreme lengths and that’s where conflict
resolution becomes essential. Conflicts are not only limited to employees and can arise among
customers too. This article will reveal certain ways and tricks of resolving conflicts among both
workers and customers in the workplace.

Conflict resolution, in simple terms is the process of finding a solution to end an argument or a
dispute. Conflict resolution requires the conflicted parties to set their problems aside and work
towards the common goal of solving the problem and ending the argument. Conflict resolution is
required mostly when an argument escalates to something more serious.

.  Conflicts can be managed and resolved in various ways but to know these strategies one must
understand the basic skills of conflict management. By being aware of these skills one will
understand what kind of skills different situations demand and which skills are required to be
applied at what particular time. These skills should be adopted and personalized for maximum
benefit. Some of these basic skills are required for conflict management are:

1. Active Listening: Active listening is the process of listening to and understanding what
the other person has to say. It is an essential communication skill that becomes very
handy while resolving conflicts. Active listening is extensively used by people in sales
while selling a product to their customers so that they can understand the requirements of
the customers and form a bond of trust with them. It is useful in resolving conflicts
because with the help of active listening, the employee can understand the grievances of
their customers better by focusing on what they have to say. To use active listening for
 maximum benefit in resolving conflicts, an employee can focus on the phrasings used by
the customers and by repeating those phrasings in their answer so that the customer
knows that they are being listened to. Active listening can also help the employee clear
out any kind of doubts regarding the conflict and can help the customer’s objectives be
understood.
2. Patience: The second skill that can be very useful in managing conflicts is the skill of
patience. Patience can help an individual in understanding the problems of all the parties
awhile resolving a conflict and help one keep a stable mind while doing so, in spite of the
chaos. It is not possible to resolve all conflicts with ease and most conflicts can take time
to be resolved. That’s why an individual must be extremely patient and keep calm while
resolving it. The perfect solution to ending a conflict can be found only with a patient
mind.
3. Emotional Intelligence: Emotional Intelligence is another skill one must develop in order
to be able to resolve conflicts. Emotionally intelligent people are able to understand other
people’s emotions and feelings along with their own. This trait becomes very essential in
resolving conflicts because being able to understand other people’s emotions and feelings
makes it easier to be able to communicate with them and understand their problems.
Being able to understand other people’s emotions also allows the individual to know
what to say to them without offending them.
4. Being impartial: An individual seeking to resolve conflicts should always be impartial in
their judgments. It is often observed that conflicts at the workplace can start of as an
argument about work but can soon become personal. There is a possibility that the two
parties can start attacking each other on the basis of their personal history and past issues
between them. In such a scenario, it is crucial for the one resolving the conflict to not
judge the conflict on the basis of personal relationship and should focus only on the
conflict. The people involved in the conflict and their personal relationship should not be
a matter of focus.
Another scenario that could arise is a conflict between a customer and an employee. In
that case too, the conflict resolver must not be partial towards the employee just because
they are colleagues and neither towards the customer. Impartiality towards everything
personal is the only right way to solve a conflict.
5. Developing a positive attitude: A positive attitude is very crucial while resolving
conflicts. Conflicts can be hard to manage at times and can feel like they are going
 nowhere. At times like these, will power and positivity is very essential to keep fighting
against the negativity and achieve a peaceful conclusion. At times conflicts could disrupt
one’s peace of mind and might tempt them to give up on the issue. This kind of attitude
will further harm the state of the workplace and bring about more negativity into the
office. Therefore a positive attitude is essential for resolving conflicts.
6. Communicating openly: To be an efficient conflict resolver one must be able to not only
communicate openly with others but should be able to enable other people to
communicate with each other more openly. Conflicts can harm relations and the parties
involved in conflicts will be sour to each other till the conflict has been resolved
peacefully. To solve this problem the individual resolving the conflict must be able to
enable an open communication between both parties in order to nurture the relationship
and put an end to the conflict. An open form of communication will allow both parties to
understand each other concisely and work together in finding a solution.

Now, to be able to resolve conflicts, an employee must possess all these skills. But mere
knowledge of them is not enough to manage conflicts and resolve them. To be able to practically
solve conflicts, an individual needs to personalize these skills and should know their correct
application. Correct application of the skills listed above will help get rid of miscommunication,
which is one of the major causes of conflicts, and will allow all employees to work towards a
shared goal. Listed below are a few ways how these skills can be applied at work to resolve
conflicts.

1. Understanding other’s point-of-view and not jumping to defense: Conflicts often result in
clashes of ego and it is often seen that people tend to defend themselves and their point-of-views
rather than understanding the other person’s perception. This kind of an attitude never allows the
smooth resolution of conflicts and further harms the situation. To be able to resolve conflicts one
must be able to understand another’s point-of-view and the reason of their argument without
being defensive about one’s own argument. This does not necessarily mean that one should agree
with the other person’s argument blindly but they should always respect the other person’s
opinion and attempt to understand it. It is commonly seen that people in conflicts generally use
words like “yes” and “no” to force their argument on the other person, but, a person who wishes
to resolve conflicts can try replacing those words with phrases like “I understand” to show the
fact that they respect the other person’s opinion and wishes to listen to them.
2. Learning not to blame others: Along with being defensive about their ideas, it is also seen that
many people start becoming offensive and start accusing the other person to win the argument.
This kind of an attitude could worsen the situation and must be avoided at all costs. To avoid this
problem one must learn how to not blame others and must allow them to voice their opinions
without any constraints.

3. Listening actively to the opinions of the other party: To be able to efficiently resolve a
conflict, one must always listen and try to understand what the other person might have to say.
This is where the managerial skill of active listening comes into play. It is generally seen people
try with all their might to get their point-of-view across and explaining themselves without
understanding or listening to the other person. This is a harmful attitude and must not be
practiced. To resolve the conflict an individual must explain their problem and also allow the
other person to voice their argument without getting interrupted. Active listening helps both
parties to understand each other better and avoid miscommunication.

4. Maintaining a calm tone and attitude: Conflicts generally become heated due to both parties
using an angry tone and attitude to get their points across. An angry attitude towards the conflict
often leads to a loss of rationality and never allows an efficient resolution of the conflict. To be
able to resolve conflicts, one must not let their emotions get better of them. Instead, a calm and
cool headspace must be maintained during the conflict so that the problem gets resolved easily. If
one is angry they should take a break from the conflict and give allow their emotions to cool
down. Once they have cooled down, they should go back and try to resolve the problem. A cool
tone should also be maintained while getting one’s points across so that the other person is not
offended or provoked.
5. Statements should begin with “I” rather than with “You”: A conflict should be free of
accusations and the ‘pointing-fingers” attitude. Sentences which begin with “You” in a conflict
can send a wrong message as they clearly sound accusatory. To solve this problem one should
always begin their sentences with “I” instead of “You. For instance, instead of saying “You don’t
listen to me” one could say “I think I should explain my problem”. Simple habits like these can
change the air of the conflict and can help ease the tension. Sentences like these will also convey
the message that the individual cares about the other person’s opinion but also would like to state
their own point-of-view. It will convey the fact that the other person’s ideas are not being
ignored and the conversation is not one sided.

6. Willing to solve the problem by compromising and collaborating:

6. Show willingness to compromise or collaborate: Not all conflicts can be major and one who is
a master of managing conflicts will understand that smaller scale mundane conflicts can be
avoided to save precious time. Conflict management can be of different types. The
accommodating style of management is best suited for situations where both parties want to
resolve the conflict with ease and in haste. On the other hand, a competing style of conflict
management may work in scenarios where the conflict needs to be resolved in limited time. In
the competing style of management, the individual might have to back down from the conflict to
save time.
But in certain cases, the solution to the conflict might involve certain sacrifices. In such a
scenario the individual must be ready to let go off their ego and their attachment with their idea
and be willing to compromise with the other party for the larger good of the company.
Willingness to compromise might also show the other party that the individual cares about their
opinion and is willing to collaborate with them to find a solution to the problem.
7. Avoidance of back biting and talking behind other people’s backs: A conflict should never
become the news for the public and should always remain a private matter. Any kind of
argument that happens between two parties should remain between them. It is often seen that
many people cannot keep their problems a secret and often go to their co-workers and complain
about the other party. This is a harmful habit and should be avoided. Conflict resolution can only
occur when both parties are honest and have a mutual trust that their argument will not be made
public. Talking behind the other party’s back would harm this trust and would also affect their
reputation. The privacy of the conflict should be maintained at all costs.
8. Avoid taking things personally: One must never mix their personal life with their professional
life. It is often seen that many people carry personal grudges against other parties they have
conflicted against. This kind of attitude should never be practiced and one must always keep in
mind that a conflict against a team member or a customer at work is a professional activity and
does not involve any one’s personal life. It is suggested that one separate themselves and their
personal lives away from the conflict and treat the conflict as the problem to be solved.
9. Importance of non-verbal communication: Non-verbal communication is an essential skill to
be learnt while working in a workspace as it is a great managerial skill. Non-verbal
communication also plays a major role in conflict resolution. One should be able to read the
body language of another person and understand what they want out of the conflict. Many people
might not be able to express themselves during an argument and in such situations it is crucial to
pay attention and understand their body language or non-verbal communication. There is another
class of people who do not mean what they say. These people are hard to communicate with and
non-verbal communication is the only way to understand them properly.
10. Higher priority must be placed on resolving the conflict and not on being right: One must
always remember that the argument will not favor them at all times. In such a scenario it is
essential for the individual to let go of their argument and opinions and focus solely on resolving
the conflict. Even if one feels strongly about their argument or opinion, at certain times it just
wiser to let go of it for the larger good of the company. Some situations are beyond the control of
employees and their opinions have to be sacrificed at times like these.
11. Apology and forgiveness: An individual who wishes to resolve conflicts must not let their
pride intrude their professional life and not shy away from using
11. Know when to apologize and forgive.

Two of the hardest words to say are, "I'm sorry." It's not easy to apologize when you feel like
you were right all along. Don't let your stubborn attitude and pride deter you from making
amends with the opposing party.

In an instance when the party might be responsible for apologizing to you, you may feel so riled
up about comments they made that you don't think you can forgive them. However, these
relationships are professional, first. Put aside your personal annoyances and forgive that person.
This will make for a healthier relationship moving forward.

12. Focus on the conflict at hand and not past ones.

In attempting to resolve a conflict, you may start getting frustrated with the other person. This
can bring up memories of past conflicts you've had with that person. And, in the heat of the
moment, it can feel like the perfect time to bring those up, too.

I like to consider a 48-hour rule. If a conflict emerges or there's something that bothers you about
someone else, you should reach out and ask to discuss it within 48 hours. Once that time frame
has passed, you should let it go. So, any pent-up frustrations about past conflicts that were never
resolved should not be brought up later on when trying to resolve a different conflict. The time
has passed, and it's important to remain in the present.

13. Use humor, when appropriate.

Using humor to lighten the mood during conflict resolution is only appropriate in conflicts that
are not personal. You never want to offend someone by making a joke about something that is a
sensitive topic.
Instead, consider this to be a tool to make you both loosen up and feel more comfortable
discussing a solution. Read the opposing party, and use your best judgment to decide if humor is
something they would appreciate. Sometimes, that's all it takes to end an argument and turn it
into a constructive conversation.

14. Remember the importance of the relationship.

At the end of the day, a conflict is usually one small roadblock in an, otherwise, healthy
relationship. While you may not necessarily be friends with that person, you probably aren't
usually butting heads.

How far are you willing to go to protect your argument? Are you willing to ruin a relationship
over it? If not -- which, hopefully, is never the case except in very serious circumstances -- then
breathe and take it as it goes. In most cases, you won't even remember the conflict after some
time has passed. So, learn to put your relationships first. That will create a more collected and
respectful conflict resolution process.