Just answer TRUE or FALSE to each

question
1. I accept myself as I am and am happy with
myself
2. Other people are not better off or more
fortunate than me
3. I enjoy socializing
4. I deserve love and respect
5. I feel valued and needed
6. I don't need others to tell me I have done a
good job
7. Being myself is important
 8. I make friends easily
 9. I can accept criticism without feeling
put down
 10. I admit my mistakes openly
 11. I never hide my true feelings
 12. I always speak up for myself and put
my views across
 13. I am a happy, carefree person
 14. I don't worry what others think of my
views
 15. I don't need others' approval to feel
good
 16. I don't feel guilty about doing or
saying what I want
 TEST SCORE
Total number of TRUE answers you gave, EACH
ONE POINT:
 15-16 POINTS –

 YOU HAVE A HIGH LEVEL OF SELF ESTEEM!

 12-14 POINTS –

 NOT BAD BUT ROOM FOR YOU TO IMPROVE

 8-11 POINTS –

 LOW SELF ESTEEM - IT'S HOLDING YOU BACK

 BELOW 8 POINTS –
 YOUR ESTEEM IS DRASTICALLY
LOW
 Write down the top-10 adjectives that you
believe most fully express who you are.
 WHAT IS SELF ESTEEM?
Self esteem is a particular way of
experiencing the self.
It is a way of thinking and acting and
feeling.
It is your tendency to experience yourself as
being capable of coping with life
challenges and of being worthy of
happiness and love
 Positive self-esteem is the immune system
of the spirit, helping an individual face life
problems and bounce back from adversity
Where Does Self-Esteem Come
From?

 Our self-esteem develops and evolves

throughout our lives as we build an image
of ourselves through our experiences with
different people and activities.
 . Experiences during our childhood play a
particularly large role in the shaping of our
basic self-esteem.
 When we were growing up, our successes
(and failures) and how we were treated by
the members of our immediate family, by
our teachers, religious authorities, and by
our peers, all contributed to the creation
of our basic self-esteem.
 Our past experiences, even the things we
don't usually think about, are all alive and
active in our daily life in the form of an
Inner Voice.
 For people with healthy self-esteem the
messages of the inner voice are positive
and reassuring .
 For people with low self-esteem, the
inner voice becomes a harsh inner critic,
constantly criticizing, punishing, and
belittling their accomplishments.
What are the signs of low self-
esteem?
Persons with low self-esteem:
 Consider themselves lost, unworthy of
being cared for.
 Are poor risk takers.
 Are typically unassertive in their behavior
with others.
 Are fearful of conflict with others.
 Are hungry for the approval of others.
 Are poor problem solvers.
 Are fraught with irrational beliefs and have
a tendency to think irrationally.
 Are susceptible to all kinds of fears.
 Operate out of a fear of rejection.
 Have a tendency to become emotionally
stuck and immobilized.
 Have a poor "track record" in school or on
the job; conversely, they sometimes over
compensate and become over-achievers.
 Are unable to affirm or to reinforce
themselves positively.
 Are unable to make an honest assessment of
their strengths, qualities, and good points; they
find it difficult to accept compliments or
recognition from others.
 Have poorly defined self-identities with a
tendency to be chameleons in order to fit in with
others.
 Are insecure, anxious, and nervous when they
are with others.
 Often become overcome with anger about
their status in life and are likely to have
chronic hostility or chronic depression.
 Are easily overcome with despair and
depression when they experience a
setback or loss in their lives.
People with self-esteem:
 Have a productive personality; they
achieve success to the best of their ability
in school, work, and society.

 Have a healthy self-concept. Their perception of

themselves is harmonized with the picture of
themselves they project to others.
 Are capable of being creative, imaginative
problem solvers; of being risk takers,
optimistic in their approach to life and in
the attainment of their personal goals.
 Are able to state clearly who they are,
what their future potential is, and to what
they are committed in life. They are able
to declare what they deserve to receive in
their lifetime
 Are able to accept the responsibility
for and consequences of their
actions. They do not resort to
shifting the blame or using others as
scapegoats for actions that have
resulted in a negative outcome.
 Are leaders and are skillful in dealing
with people. They are neither too
independent nor too dependent on
others.
 Are altruistic. They have a legitimate
concern for the welfare of others.
They are not self-centered or
egotistical in their outlook on life.
 Have healthy coping skills. They are
able to handle the stresses in their
lives in a productive way.
 They have a good sense of humor
and are able to keep a balance of
work and fun in their lives.
 They are goal-oriented with a sense
of balance in working toward their
goals. They know from where they
have come, where they are now, and
where they are going.
 Myths and Realities

If you want to solve your problems, raise

your self-esteem.
Reality
Self esteem is raised by meeting our
problems head-on and treating our self
with respect.
If your self esteem is too high ,you will be
self-absorbed and selfish.
Reality
It is impossible to have too much self
esteem. self absorption comes from not
having enough self esteem.
If you want to raise others self esteem,
praise them for whatever they do.
Reality
People quickly realize when praise is not
based on their effort or accomplishments
,too much praise can feel like ‘’pressure’’
and can actually lower their self esteem.
Your self esteem is determined by your
childhood.
Reality
Self esteem is something that can be raised
or lowered at any point in life .
If you have good self esteem, nothing
bothers you.
Reality
Self esteem won’t protect you from pain,
but it can help you bounce back faster and
believe that you ‘ll make it through.
 Steps to Better Self-Esteem

1: Rebut the Inner Critic

2: Practice Self-Nurturing
3: Get Help from Others
 Rebut the Inner Critic

 People said they liked  Wow, they really liked

my presentation, but it! Maybe it wasn't
it was nowhere near perfect, but I worked
as good as it should hard on that
have been. I can't presentation and did
believe no-one a good job. I'm proud
noticed all the places of myself. This was a
I messed up. I'm such great success."
an impostor."
 “x is frowning x didn't  O.K., x's frowning,
say anything, but I but I don't know why.
know it means that x It could have nothing
doesn't like me!" to do with me. Maybe
I should ask."
 Practice Self-Nurturing the second step
to more healthy self-esteem is to begin to
treat yourself as a worthwhile person.
 There are several components to self-
nurturing:
 Practice Basic Self-Care
 Plan Fun & Relaxing Things For
Yourself
 Remind Yourself of Your Strengths &
Achievements
 Forgive Yourself When You Don't Do
All You'd Hoped
 Self-Nurture Even When You Don't
Feel You Deserve It
 Reward Yourself For Your
Accomplishments
Get Help from Others
 Ask for Support from Friends

 Get Help from Teachers & Other

Helpers
 Talk to a Therapist or Counselor