Final Reflection

Prompt #1: In Module 1, you watched "Invictus," a clip from the movie "Gandhi," and a 60
Minute Segment on Mindfulness.  The idea was to have you look at attitude and a
mental model about conflict, review the attitudes of two powerful leaders, and consider
your own approach to conflict.  Did this Module help set a foundation upon which to
develop the rest of the course?  What worked and didn't work?

This module helped me to realize that winning a conflict or an argument isn’t what
makes one powerful. In fact, some of the most powerful figures in history, such as
Mandela and Gandhi, were able to view conflict from a different perspective. Mandela
saw issues underlying many conflicts and realized that by uniting the people in a
common cause, they could overcome what divided them. Gandhi focused on the bigger
picture and sought ways to remedy the source of ongoing conflict.

Prompt #2:  In Module 2, you were introduced to the martial art, Aikido.  The purpose of
this module was to use a martial art that deals with "physical conflict" in a different way,
a way that provided a metaphor for how to deal with conflict in the workplace.  What did
you take away from this Module?  Did you see a connection between the principles of
Aikido and the principles of dealing professionally with workplace conflict?  

This module showed me that conflict should not be avoided or suppressed as it is in

many organizational cultures, but rather welcomed as a force of energy. The
connection I made was that when we view conflict as an opportunity for learning and
growth, we are able to more easily welcome, blend, and lead it to a more successful
outcome.

Prompt #3:  In Module 3, you were introduced to the first conflict transformation skill,
"Spitting Out the Hook."  Did you learn the skill?  Will it help you deal with conflict?  Was
this quiz (and were the quizzes} fair, too hard, or too easy?  Did the quizzes help you
gain more from the text?

I loved this skill and have already used it, particularly with my “difficult” mother-in-law. I
am now able to recognize that whatever she says to try and bait me into an argument, I
am 100% responsible for my reaction and do not have to take the hook. When I stay
centered and don’t allow myself to get reeled in and become defensive, I hold a more
powerful position to resolve the conflict and feel better about myself. The quizzes did
help me to review what I had learned in the text. They were all pretty easy for me,
however I am an active reader and take very detailed notes as I read.

Prompt #4: In Module 4, you were introduced to the second conflict transformation skill,
"H.E.A.R."  Did you learn the skill?  Will it help you deal with conflict?  Some of you
already use an active listening skill; was learning H.E.A.R. too redundant or was it
valuable to review?

I did learn H.E.A.R. and recently used it again with my mother-in-law. It was valuable
because by explaining what I understood her to be upset about from her initial response,
it clarified that was not what she was upset about at all. By asking questions to
understand rather than becoming emotional and defensive, we were able to guide the
conflict to see what was really bothering her, which had very little to do with me. When I
responded, I told her what I could do to help in the future, but also set some boundaries
so that we wouldn’t have reoccurrence of the same conflict again. `

Prompt #5: In Module 5, you were introduced to the third conflict transformation skill,
"BURN CLEAN."  Did you learn the skill?  Will it help you deal with conflict? Will it help
you express your "wants" without throwing out hooks?

I think this skill will be particularly useful at work, where I have been reluctant to tell
others how what happened made me feel. In addition, by clearly stating what I want and
the positive and even negative consequences of what will happen if I do or do not get
what I want, it takes the guesswork out of the scenario. I don’t have to assume that my
superior or my reports know what I want, because I have told them. More importantly,
by affirming the other person, it can help to build trust and cohesion in the team and
support an environment of open, honest communication.

Prompt #6: In Module 6, you were introduced to the fourth conflict transformation skill,
"SAY YES."  Did you learn the steps in this skill?  Will you be able to use it to help you
transform conflict?  How confident do you feel about using the SAY YES Model?  

I learned the steps in this skill and will definitely come back to in, especially when
leading teams and encountering conflicts in which members are stuck. Even when I am
not in a mediation scenario, I have and will continue to use the critical question, “what
will be true when you get what you want that isn’t true now?”. I see this as especially
helpful in parenting my 8 year-old son, as often he isn’t aware of why he wants
something. By asking the critical question, I can help him to uncover the real unmet
needs or wants that are driving his desire. As far as using the entire model, I would
definitely need my notes until I became more skilled.

Prompt #7: Is there something you wish you had learned or some topic we needed to
spend more or less time on? Add any final thoughts you think would be helpful in
improving this course.  Overall, was the workload fair and manageable, light or too
much?  

I loved the structure of this course and thoroughly enjoyed the content. I think the
workload was fair and manageable. I struggled a bit with my previous OGL 340 class on
Artificial Intelligence, for even though it was fascinating, it was just a lot of material in
such a short time frame. I was a little nervous about taking this course in the even
shorter summer term, but found I was able to keep up with little challenge. It was a
huge help to me that this course became available on Canvas a few days before the
official start of term, as I could work ahead and better manage my time.