SELF LOVE

Self-love is an important aspect

of mental health. When self-love
is applied, you will find it easier
to think positively, including when
angry, disappointed, or sad,
because it is a form of self-
acceptance.

Cultivating self-love in yourself

can create happiness in the
future, make yourself more
confident, not compare yourself
to others, and have a strong
mentality. Believe me no human
being is perfect, so focus on
accepting flaws and busy
improving yourself.
Do you guys already love
yourself? Maybe this looks trivial,
but there are still many people
who don't love themselves.
Moreover, in adolescence, many
teenagers often feel insecure
about their physical condition or
feel different when it comes
to comparing themselves to
others. Loving ourselves not only
means being selfish, pursuing
your own desires, and pleasures,
but loving ourselves requires us
to accept ourselves as we are.

The Importance of Self-Love for

Your Physical and Mental Health

A. Changing Your
Thought Patterns
1. Let go of negative thought
patterns and beliefs about
yourself.
 Negative thoughts often come
from outside people whose
opinions we value and from
whom we seek love and
acceptance. Drill down to the
core of those negative thoughts
and tell yourself a different story.
Think about what you would say
to a close friend who said those
 things about themselves.

Ÿ For example, if you forgot to buy

trash bags when you got
groceries, you might say to
yourself, "Ugh! I'm so stupid!
How could I forget that?" Instead
of calling yourself stupid, you
might think, "Oops! Forgot those
pesky trash bags. I'll just pick
some up next time I go out—no
big deal."

Ÿ Don't try to fight negative

thoughts, though—they're a part
of who you are. Simply drown
them out with more positive,
affirmative thoughts about
yourself. It might feel weird at
first, but after a while, it becomes
habitual to think that way. 
2. Accept your flaws as part of
who you are. 
Everything you've done and
everywhere you've been is a part
of who you are—you! Self-love
isn't about fixing all the "bad"
things about yourself. Instead,
accept that they're all parts of the
same whole. When you love
yourself, you love all of you
because you wouldn't have the
good without the bad.
Ÿ For example, maybe you have a
hard time trusting people. You
wish you could be more trusting
and open up more, but instead of
trying to change, focus on how
not immediately trusting people
helps keep you safe.

3. Focus on your effort rather

than the result to control
perfectionism.
If you expect yourself to be
perfect all the time, you'll never
be pleased with anything you
produce. This can lead to low
self-esteem. Instead, make a
point to appreciate the work you
put into completing a task, rather
than looking for flaws in what you
 produced.

Ÿ Changing your focus from the

final product to the effort you put
into it will help you appreciate
your own good work and take
pride in what you do.
Ÿ Avoid stereotypical ideas and
images of perfection, such as
models in beauty magazines or
on social media. Remind yourself
that the actual person probably
doesn't look like that in real life!

4. Practice gratitude for good

things rather than focusing on
the negative. 
It's human nature to see negative
things as bigger and more
important than positive things,
but this also does tremendous
damage to your self-esteem.
When you find yourself focusing
on negative or less favorable
events in your life, immediately
 try to name 3 to 5 things that you
can be grateful for. Look for the
positive side even when bad
things happen to you.

Ÿ For example, if you lose your job,

it can
be easy to spiral into thinking
that you were terrible at your job
and no one will ever hire you
again. Instead, you might think
that now you have the
opportunity to find something
that's a better fit for you

5. Quiet the mental name-

calling about yourself. 
When you call yourself a name,
you reduce yourself to a single
thing that you don't like—you're
not treating yourself as a whole
 person. If you wouldn't call your
best friend these names, don't
call yourself those names either

Ÿ For example, if you lose your job,

you might think "I'm such a
failure. I'll never amount to
anything." Stop. Take a deep
breath and be more constructive.
Think instead, "I lost my job, but I
can learn from this experience to
find and keep a new job that
suits me better."

Ÿ You might also look at yourself in

the mirror and think, "I'm so
ugly." Instead of thinking that, list
3 things that you like about your
appearance and focus on those.
Each time, challenge yourself to
add one more thing to your list.
6. Pull yourself away from
assumptions that the worst
will happen. 
This sort of "catastrophizing" is
really bad for your self-esteem
because you spiral from a small
error to basically believing that
everything is doomed—and
that's rarely the case. Challenge
 those thoughts with realistic and
logical observations to reframe
your conclusion.

Ÿ For example, you might make a

small
mistake at work and obsess
about it to the point that you're
convinced you're going to be
fired for it (when that's likely not
the case at all). Instead of
allowing that to happen, tell
yourself, "I just made a small
mistake. I can fix it and let
everyone know it won't happen
again."

B. Practicing Self-Love
Every Day
1. List your positive attributes
and reflect on them daily. 
If you habitually think negatively
of yourself, this can be a tough
one! Try to come up with just one
thing each week to add to the
list. Before you know it, you'll
have a nice long list to reflect on
as you realize what a wonderful
and beautiful person you are.
Ÿ Be specific! For example, instead
of, "I am generous," you might
write, "Any time I see that a
friend is struggling, I give them a
small, thoughtful gift to show that
I care. This makes me
generous."

Ÿ As you read and reflect on your

list, remember that even the
items that seem insignificant are
still reasons that you are worthy
of respect and love.
2. Take time to reflect and
recharge so you have energy
for others. 
You may have heard the phrase,
"Put your own oxygen mask on
first." It's easy to feel guilty about
spending time on yourself, but
the reality is that this time allows
you to recharge so that you're
better able to help others. Give
yourself permission to spend
time reflecting on yourself and
your own life, and never feel
guilty for taking the time that you
need.
 3. Celebrate and reward
yourself for your
accomplishments. 
Rewarding yourself is the best
part of practicing self-love. When
you reward yourself, you're
telling yourself that you're worthy
of love and special treatment.
Just think about how you might
celebrate with a friend who'd just
accomplished something
amazing, then go out and do that
for yourself.

Ÿ For example, you might take

yourself out to a nice dinner at
your favorite fancy restaurant or
buy yourself the new book or
 video game you've had your eye
on.

Ÿ Rewards don't have to be

expensive! For example, you
might take a relaxing bath or go
out on a solo fishing trip.
 4. Set boundaries with others
to show love for yourself and
your limits. 
The idea of boundaries can
sound like a big, scary thing, but
it's really just about saying "no"
when you don't have the energy
or desire to do something.
Remember that "no" is a
complete sentence—you don't
have to explain or justify yourself.
Honor and respect your own
limits and other people will
recognize that you're respecting
them as well.

Ÿ For example, a co-worker

might've asked you to take them
home after work, but they're
always running late. This bugs
you because you have to get
home as soon as possible to let
your dog out. You might say, "I'm
happy to give you a ride, but I
need you to leave on time so I
can get home."
Ÿ When you let others know what
you are and aren't okay with,
your relationships become more
balanced and healthy because
you're not putting up with things
that make you uncomfortable.

5. Develop a plan for dealing

with setbacks or negativity. 
Whenever you're having a hard
time, whether from a person or
something happening in your life,
pause and take 10 deep and
purposeful breaths. As you
breathe in, think about yourself
and think that you love yourself.
Then breathe out the negativity.
After you've done 10 breaths,
you might find you want to do 10
more. Just focus on yourself.
Ÿ You might notice that negative
comments from a particular
person, such as your mom or
your boss, set you off into a
spiral of negativity. When you
figure out why this person affects
you that way you can better
control your response.

Ÿ When faced with negative

thoughts, give yourself a time-out
to meditate or just take a few
cleansing deep breaths. This
gives you the opportunity to
acknowledge your feelings and
reframe your reaction.
 6. Repeat positive affirmations
daily. Find positive thoughts that
resonate with you and repeat
them to yourself daily. This might
seem awkward or cheesy at first,
but the habit will cause the
positive thoughts to sink in and
you'll start to believe those
thoughts (even if you don't at
first).

Ÿ For example, you might say, “I

am a whole, worthy individual,
and I respect, trust, and love
myself.”

Ÿ If you find that affirmations aren't

helping on their own, a therapist
can help you pursue a multi-level
treatment plan that includes
other approaches.
7. Do things that make you feel
good. 
Think of things that make you
feel good on a physical,
emotional, or spiritual level. This
might involve exercise,
meditation, dancing, journaling,
or visual art. Find a routine that
feels good and stick to it, taking
 time for yourself every day.
Ÿ Spend time alone doing activities
you love or take yourself on a fun
outing, such as going to the
movies or out to eat. Take
advantage of your alone time
and use it for pleasure.

Be Grateful
True self love was indeed
created for us to be more grateful
and everyone should have to
apply self love as soon as
possible.
What is the relationship between
self love and grateful?
Because loving ourselves is part
of being grateful and Allah SWT
likes people who are grateful, we
must love ourselves first so we
can know what is best for
ourselves.
How to Always Be Grateful in
Any Circumstances
1. Change Mindset
2. Write Things You Are Grateful
For Every Day
3. Less Complaining
4. Don't Often Compare Yourself
to Others and Confident in Each
Other's Fortune

Grateful in Islamic Way

1. Always remember to say
"Alhamdulillah" when you see
something that you feel grateful
for.
2. Say "Masha'Allah" to any one
who is blessed.