Experiences of Selected College Students in Metro Manila in Maintaining Long-Term Romantic Relationships

I
Experiences of Selected College Students in Metro

Manila in Maintaining Long-term Romantic
Relationships
A Thesis Submitted to the Faculty of the

Undergraduate Studies Program
Institute of Arts and Sciences
FAR EASTERN UNIVERSITY, MANILA
In Partial Fulfilment of the Requirements

for the Degree of
Bachelor of Science in Psychology
Angeles, Patrick Ravi M.

Belesta, Johanna S.
Diza, Angel M.
Espino, Danielle D.
Genoves, Patricia Lyn C.
Oandasan, Angela E.
May 2023
II
APPROVAL SHEET
This undergraduate thesis entitled “EXPERIENCES OF SELECTED COLLEGE

STUDENTS IN METRO MANILA IN MAINTAINING LONG-TERM
ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS,” prepared and submitted by PATRICK RAVI M.
ANGELES, JOHANNA S. BELESTA, ANGEL M. DIZA, DANIELLE D.
ESPINO, PATRICIA LYN C. GENOVES, ANGELA E. OANDASAN in partial
fulfillment of the requirements for the course PSY 1212 Research in Psychology 2,
has been examined and is recommended for Oral Examination.

Anselmo Edwin Aruelo, MBM, DipWLD
Adviser
This thesis, which was presented to the Panel for Oral Examination on [complete
date], is hereby accepted.
Anna Patricia Sevilla, RPsy Maria Daniela Anne Samaniego, MA

Member Member
Dr. Eda Lou Ochangco

Chair
Approved in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the degree Bachelor of

Science in Psychology
Dr. Myra Landagan

Department Chair

Dr Rowena C. Reyes
Dean
III
DECLARATION OF ORIGINALITY
We, the authors of this thesis entitled “EXPERIENCES OF SELECTED COLLEGE

STUDENTS IN METRO MANILA IN MAINTAINING LONG-TERM
ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS,” hereby declare that:
1. This paper is the product of our own work.

2. This work contains no fabricated and plagiarized materials, i.e., all borrowed
ideas, texts, and graphics incorporated in the study have been properly cited.
3. This paper has not been submitted elsewhere for publication or to any other
higher education institution for a degree.
We also understand that we can be appropriately sanctioned by Far Eastern University

should this declaration be found untruthful.

Belesta, Johanna S.
Diza, Angel M.
Espino, Danielle D.
Oandasan, Angela E.
Verified by
Anselmo Edwin Aruelo, MBM, DipWLD

Adviser

IV
V
Acknowledgement
First and foremost, praise the God almighty for blessing us with parents who
provide us never ending support, including providing allowance and money when
there are things to be accomplished for research including going to study hubs, coffee
shops, giving incentives, etc.
We also want to express our deepest and sincere gratitude to our Psychology
Faculty members. We are extremely grateful for Dr. Reinalyn Cardenas, our
professor, who is so patient in guiding us in writing, answering our queries regarding
the paper when there are topics we need clarification about, and adjusting deadlines
when we need more time. She also reassures us when we are worried with graduating,
and never fails to motivate and remind us for the tasks that we need to do.
To Mr. Anselmo Edwin Aruelo for accepting us to be his research advisee
regardless of his busy schedule as a professor and a director. We are thankful how he
takes the time to check on our paper, as well as following up the progress of our
members as a group. He also takes the effort, especially during the first semester, to
read through our papers and explain us concepts on what a better fit for our study.
Special thanks to our friends, family, and significant other (for some
members) who are there to check on us, help us find participants, as well as for being
an outlet for us to vent to when we are overwhelmed and frustrated because of the
loads of tasks that we need to do.

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TABLE OF CONTENTS
Title Page ……………………………………………………………….................. i

Approval Sheet ………………………………………………………………................... ii
Authorship Declaration (with TURNITIN Similarity Index) …………………………………. iii
Acknowledgment ………………………………………………………………................... v
Table of Contents ………………………………………………………………................... vii
Abstract ………………………………………………………………................... viii
CHAPTER 1. INTRODUCTION …………………………………………………........... 1

Theoretical Framework ………………………………………………......... 6
Conceptual Paradigm ………………………………………………......... 8
Statement of the Problem ………………………………………………......... 10
Assumptions ………………………………………………......... 10
Significance of the Study ………………………………………………......... 10
Scope and Limitation of the Study ………………………………………………......... 12
Definition of Terms ………………………………………………......... 13
CHAPTER 2. REVIEW OF RELATED LITERATURE ……………………………………. 16
Outcomes of Being in a Romantic ………………………………………………......... 16
Relationship in Young Adulthood
Long-term Romantic Relationship ………………………………………………......... 21
Among College Students
Heterosexual Romantic ………………………………………………......... 25
Relationship in Philippines and
in West
Synthesis of the Reviewed Literature ………………………………………………......... 29
and Studies
CHAPTER 3. METHOD
Research Design ………………………………………………......... 30
Participants ………………………………………………......... 30
Ethical Consideration ………………………………………………......... 31
VII
Instruments ………………………………………………......... 34
Procedure ………………………………………………......... 36
Data Analysis ………………………………………………......... 37
CHAPTER 4. RESULTS AND DISCUSSION …………………………………………….. 39
CHAPTER 5. SUMMARY, CONCLUSION, AND RECOMMENDATIONS ……………. 87
Summary ………………………………………………......... 87
Conclusion ………………………………………………......... 89
Recommendations ………………………………………………......... 89
Reflexivity ………………………………………………......... 90
References …………………………………………………………………………………… 94
Appendices
A. Permit to Conduct Research ……………………………………………………………… 102
B. Certification of Approval of Research Proposal ………………………………………….. 103
C. Sample Accomplished Informed Consent …………………………………………........... 104
D. Letter for Review of Research Instrument ………………………………………………… 105
E. Certificate of Approval of Research Instruments ………………………………………… 108
F. Sample Personal Data Sheet ………………………………………………………………. 111
G. Certification of Pilot Study ……………………………………………………………...... 112
H. Interview Guide ………………………………………………………………………........ 113
I. Transcribed Data …………………………………………………………………………... 114
J. Demographics of Respondents ……………………………………………………............ 153
K. Researchers Bionote ………………………………………………………………………. 154
VIII
Abstract
The purpose of this study was to investigate the experiences of
selected heterosexual college students in Metro Manila in maintaining long-term
romantic relationships, including the challenges they faced, their motivation, and the
benefits that they gained. The study has a total of 10 college participants from Metro
Manila within the age range of 18-26, who identifies themselves as heterosexual, and
are currently in a romantic relationship with the opposite sex for at least three years and
above duration. The researchers utilized a phenomenological research design within the
qualitative method to gain a deeper understanding of the experiences of the study's
participants, including the difficulties they faced, their motivation to maintain their
relationship, and the benefits they derived from being in a long-term relationship.
Results revealed that the experiences in the relationship are composed of positive and
negative states of emotions from the challenges and benefits of the couple that are
influenced by internal factors as well as external factors coming from academic
responsibilities, perception and expectations from their families. Satisfaction of the
relationship and affection for their partner were the primary reasons why individuals
pursued to maintain it that happens when their needs are met and their contributions are
perceived as significant, growing in the process as they practice the values and virtues
established within that helps them overcome the challenges and becomes beneficial for
their goals. Benefits gained from the relationship revolved around the college student
lifestyle that exhibits moral, mental, emotional, and financial support.

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Chapter 1
Introduction
Being in a romantic relationship is delightful, but it is more ideal when it lasts
long. (Spring, 2021). A relationship in general is a connection among people, and this
can differ (Gonsalves, 2021). A romantic relationship is a type of relationship where
partners are intimate and passionate towards each other where they use labels that
they will give to each other can also vary. This includes labeled romantic relationship,
casual dating, casual sex, situationship (definition) or ethical nonmonogamy.
Gonsalves mentioned the labeled romantic relationship where couples use identifiers
such as “boyfriend/girlfriend”, “significant other”, or “partner” to give a clear
identification of their involvement to each other. People in such relationships strive to
maintain what they have for a long-term duration which is why they allot quality time
and show intimacy for each other. Couples harness it to acquire a better understanding
of themselves, of the world around them, and of the future they are trying to build.
They also seek improvement to encourage growth in the relationship.
The long-term duration of romantic relationships is still subjective at this day
and there are zero to little number of research on defining what is considered “long-
term.” Some research say it is about two years, other articles say its three years, but
according to Applebury (2020), nine months to three years duration are the days when
relationships are still the fresh years since the “honeymoon phase” or the lovey-dovey
state are still high. As time passes by, couples get to know each other more, and being
deeply immersed in each other’s routines gets boring as there is not much to know
about them anymore. Applebury explained that when the high levels of oxytocin or
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the “love hormone” are dropped off from this duration and a couple are still making
an effort to be together, they want to commit and make things work out. She added
that to be considered “long-term”, it still depends on the couple on what they consider
as a long duration, and there are no rules bound to define if it is long or not. Other
research for lasting couples often mentions 3 years and above, but others do not tackle
a romantic relationship’s duration without involving marriage. Married years are often
deemed as long when a married couple is already together for 11 years, or more than.
Relationships have their own advantages and downsides to humans. According
to University of Utah (2023), it is good to be engaged in loving relationships as it
keeps people healthy, may it be in the casual encounters on daily basis such as
greeting street vendors, saying hello to a favorite cashier, or greeting classmates or
colleagues. Kirtly Parker Jones, MD (2023) from University of Utah expressed that
people involved in relationships, even the Philia ones (love without romantic
attraction), are often feeling positive, hence the lesser need to do hospital visits.
Further stated in the article that there are other health benefits in a relationship such as
it can contribute to longer life, and it can heal people due to having social support.
On the other hand, when it comes to romantic relationships, the benefits that it
has are similar in essence. The study of Braithwaite and Holt-Lunstad (2017) found
that there is an association between romantic relationships and mental health. Their
study generated that romantic relationships are key components for a human to
function better and influence various effects in mental health. Their study also implies
that by improving relationships, there is a positive and beneficial effect on mental
health that is at par regarding performance of treatments that are used for improving
individual mental health. There is also an article by McIntosh (2015) where it is stated
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that the body and mind benefits, especially when a person is in a healthy relationship.
Partners encourage stopping vices or being fit which contributes to a healthier body.
Warm physical interactions such as hugs are also found to lower heart rates and lower
blood pressure.
Inversely, there are negative effects of romantic relationships to people. As
much as it can benefit the mental health, it can also be detrimental and be a major
stressor (Till & Niederkrotenthaler, 2022). Rowe (2021) explained that problems
occur in relationships, and there are arguments or negative situations that don’t get
resolved right away. When this persists, it causes couples to fight which leads to loss
of respect, hurting the other person, and drifting away.
After adolescence, people outgrow their old ways where they start to navigate
and explore in terms of romantic relationships, especially on what set up do they
want, and who they want to be with. In the young adult age range of 18-26 years old,
a lot of them are already in college, and according to Lantagne & Furman (2017),
romantic relationships in this phase have higher rates of intimacy, selflessness, and
support tend to last longer with at least one year duration. Maturing also plays a role
on how young adults view their romantic relationships as they gradually start to
change their goals and focus, hence they change their attitudes towards relationships;
having a better insight in handling relationships that can potentially lead to marriage.
Stated by Cherry (2020), romantic relationships score high on the priority list of
college students as it is in this stage that the connection with possible romantic
partners determines their passion and satisfaction for life, and there is also excitement,
and sense of belonging that romantic relationships provide. Although there are a lot of
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positive effects to others, where some fall apart as soon as months or even weeks
while others stay strong and persist long after graduating.
College students experience an array of emotions and stress that affects their
behavior, productivity, and mental health. They also participate in various activities
that are prominent in universities such as socializing with a lot of people and building
relationships. As students engage in these activities, they experience emotions and
accumulate behaviors that may affect their decisions. Experimentations on different
people, views, and attitudes are arguably best for most people during college. This is
the time when students in their late adolescence and young adulthood learn to interact
with other people with different perspectives from them through social relationships
(Brockman, 2018). Life values and other circumstances can change or improve a
person depending on how it affects the person and how he copes with it. Late
adolescence usually starts during the years in college which is also the start of most
people to engage in dating experiences. Different times, environment, and
circumstances change the nature of romantic relationships as well.
Being in college is the most stressful era of a student's academic journey and
one must see to it that they find a balance in their life where they can focus on their
academics but is still able to consider the life that they have outside of it (Karambelas,
2019). It is important that as a student they must be able to play different roles and be
able to tell the priority of it such as it could be their role as a friend, employee, or a
partner. Balancing these roles is a must to a student’s life because it will ensure the
optimal functioning of a student with their academics. Often, students would put their
academics on the top list of their priorities in exchange of factors which are personal
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such as living a healthy lifestyle or their relationships, and by doing this a student
could lead to a sudden decline on their performance (academic-wise) since all those
factors are very critical when it comes to how well they will do in school.
As mentioned in the earlier part, as any other people after adolescence, college
students as young adults already have an idea on how they identify, and who they
want to be in a relationship; may it be in the same sex, opposite sex, etc. Although in
this paper, it will mainly focus on the dynamics of heterosexual relationships. To
elaborate, heterosexuality is a sexual orientation in which two people of the
"opposite" sex and gender feel emotional, romantic, and/or sexual attraction and
desire. According to Poole (2017), as heterosexuality gained acceptance, it was
likewise institutionalized through state, legal, medical, psychiatric, and media
channels as the cornerstone of the country and the sole acceptable way to structure
lives. The "nuclear family" is built on heterosexuality, which is institutionalized in
modern societies as the only acceptable means of reproduction. It is a gendered
connection that serves as the foundation of the nuclear family and establishes
domestic, emotional, economic, and other divisions of work and resources.
With this being said, young adults now tend to spend more time dating, being in
romantic relationships, and thinking or talking about the ideal mate because of the
Westernization of urban society. However, most parents and adults may disregard this
as being shallow, while most adolescent relationships are short-lived and lack the
complexity of a long-term one, they are nonetheless important for young people and
even vital to their development (Orbigo, 2017).

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Theoretical Framework
The Investment Model of Commitment Process
The Investment Model was derived from the interdependence theory by
Rusbult et al. (2011), and it proposes that people stay in a romantic relationship even
when faced with challenges with their partners. These experiences can be detrimental
to their overall health, yet they still stay due to their investment in the person and
when they see no better alternative in a partner. Rusbult explained that this leads them
to instead understand the circumstances and remain in the relationship. To further
elaborate on the components of the investment model, it was stated in the study that
the concept of investment is not limited to the things that has been given to a person,
but it also includes those that are yet to happen, such as the plans that they have with
their partner, and those things that are yet to be established in the relationship. The
investment of a couple will be lost if their relationship is to be ended over a difficult
situation, so instead, they redirect it into looking for more reasons to continue to be
together. Their plans are also a reason to keep them going as they believe that
executing those things will heighten the likelihood of making the relationship
successful. People differ in terms of tolerance and resilience because some of them
are highly committed, which results in persistence. They transform unpleasant
experiences in a way that must positively contribute to the relationship, and they do
not think about themselves alone, rather their partner’s feelings must be put first.
Though the downside to this is they have the tendency to overlook
unacceptable behaviors of their partner which results in denial. On the other hand,
those that are less inclined to stay in a relationship often show a damaging response
where it does not promote the relationship. Rusbult’s model also posited that external
factors such as opinions and societal norms play a significant role in the relationship
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where couples commit to each other, and it broadens the lens as to why couples
remain in a relationship with each other.
A Triangular Theory of Love
The Triangular Theory of Love was proposed by Robert Sternberg (1986;
2004) where he posited that there are three significant components of relationship
such as intimacy, passion, and decision/commitment. There is an assigned component
per vertex in the triangle, and the upper top part is where the intimacy lies. Passion is
found in the left vertex of the triangle, and in the right part is where the
decision/commitment is. According to Sternberg, the placement of these components
has no bearing because they were only put in random places, which is arbitrary. To
discuss the three components, the first is intimacy where it is defined as the bond
between a couple and how they can closely relate to each other. Intimacy also makes
individuals feel connected to their partner where it contributes to making them feel
loved and experience a warm relationship with one another. The second component is
passion where there is the drive towards physical attraction, romantic aspect, and
sexual consummation. Sternberg refers to passion as the “hot” part of the relationship
because it involves having arousing experiences to keep a passion that provides drive
for a person to stay in a relationship. In the third component, the decision or
commitment, it relies on the cognitive abilities because an individual is aware of the
existing relationship they have with their partner, and it is up to them to decide if they
want to continue by staying and by keeping the love, intimacy, and passion alive in a
relationship. Upon deciding to stay invested, this will ensure the longevity of a
relationship because an individual wants to pursue the relationship in the long run.
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Conceptual Paradigm
Figure 1
Relationship between the Heterosexual College Students and the Experiences in
Long-term Romantic Relationship, Challenges, and Benefits
The construct of the paradigm roots from the heterosexual college students'
experiences in their current long-term relationship, the challenges encountered inside
of the relationship, and the benefits that they gained while they are in the said
relationship.
Using a flowchart type of mapping the concepts, heterosexual college students
is best fitting as the starting point to which data will be coming from. An inductive
approach is utilized to collect narratives that describe the experiences, challenges, and
benefits of the participants. Regardless whether the experiences are positive or
negative, it is crucial to examine if they contribute to the process of decision making
whether a person desires to remain and maintain the said relationship. How they
manage the challenges faced and how they feel about it contributes to why they
maintain the relationship. On the other hand, determining the benefits of being in the
relationship also helps in revealing the positive reinforcements that they go through to
maintain it. Information gathered from these circumstances can provide general
themes that summarizes what drives them to maintain their present romantic
relationship with another individual of the opposite sex. Shared ideals within romantic
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dyads help in committing to and maintaining relationships since it offers perceived
relationship stability (Frye & Trinitapoli, 2015). Hence, the experiences, challenges,
and benefits of college students in a maintaining a heterosexual relationship opens a
discussion of various similarities and difference of the individual with their person of
interest and what they do with them whether they are aware of it or not; these will
help determine the likeliness to maintain a relationship with them.
The experiences are the overall understanding of the circumstances they are
immersed in that brought awareness of how they can describe it. The challenges are
the setbacks faced in romantic relationships. Whether it is from small disagreements
to bigger issues, long-lasting couples strive in having common grounds to continue
being with their partner for a longer duration, or else it will lead them in parting ways.
Managing setbacks is an element that determines whether the existing relationship is
supportive or unsupportive to the standpoint of their respective significant other that
can either result in detrimental or beneficial consequences (Laursen, B., & Hafen, C.,
2010). Meanwhile, benefits are the knowledge on how college students are positively
impacted when they are in a romantic relationship.
Substantially, the diagram focuses on heterosexual college students and the
occurrences they face with or from their partner as they maintain a long-term
romantic relationship and how these variables affect their willingness to maintain the
relationship they have.

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Statement of the problem
The researchers seek to identify the experiences of heterosexual college
students in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship. The questions of this study
would be focused on the following statements below:
1. What are the experiences of heterosexual college students in a long-term
romantic relationship?
2. What are the challenges encountered by the participants in staying in a long-
term romantic relationship?
3. What benefits do college students get by being in a long-term romantic
relationship?
Assumptions
1. Staying in a long-term romantic relationship is a decision made by an
individual where components such as love, intimacy, and passion must be
provided by the partner.
2. Challenges strengthen a relationship, but it can also negatively impact an
individual.
3. The benefits that an individual gets from their partner also positively affects
their life where they become healthier, experience lower stress, and are more
satisfied in life.
Significance of the study
Relationships are essential in the intra/interpersonal aspects of life and
maintaining them is crucial to keep oneself healthy, as humans are social beings
(Betts, 2018). Studies about long-term relationships will provide a deeper

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understanding about the process of how a romantic relationship is maintained between
a couple, but it is not limited to this concept alone as other facets of a relationship
may be discussed. The benefactors are identified by the researchers such as the
following:
Couples
The findings of this study could help the couple’s understanding of why they
act in a certain way, particularly why they choose to maintain their relationship as this
could be a way for couples to assess themselves and their relationship.
Researchers
Identifying experiences that lead a person into maintaining a relationship
enables advancements of research in the topics that can contribute further literature on
the topic of love, particularly the aspect of maintaining long-term romantic
relationships.
Mental health professionals and Mental health institutions
Synthesis from the study contributes to the systematic approach that mental
health professionals and mental institutions follow in producing relevant and efficient
methods of intervention to individuals involved in conflict related to heterosexual
romantic relationships that may reveal correlations to mental issues and/or disorders
Single heterosexual college students
This study will further the understanding of concepts pertaining to the
challenges, motivators, and benefits in maintaining long-term romantic relationships.

12
This study focuses on these variables which they could use to expand their knowledge
on the topic as romantic relationships are considered by the researchers a big interest
in single heterosexual college students.
Parents
May utilize the findings of the research on their children. Findings would give
parents an idea how romantic relationships are now in the status quo given that there
is an existing generational gap between parents and offspring. These generational
gaps are often a sign of differences between phenomena, particularly in maintaining
romantic relationships.
Scope and limitations of the study
The scope of the study is limited to the experiences of college students on how
they stay in a long-term romantic relationship, along with the challenges and benefits
that they get from it. Short-term relationships will not be further discussed by the
researchers, and other types of romantic relationships such as those that were
mentioned in the introduction like hooking up or casual sex, situationships, casual
dating, etc. Marriage and separation are also excluded as the paper will focus on the
investment of a couple on how they stay through a long-term romantic relationship.
Additional inclusion criteria for the study are heterosexuals as the paper will only give
a brief explanation on how other genders maintain and engage in romantic
relationships.
Aspects such as individuals who are in a married relationship, in a relationship
within the duration of less than three years, or individuals who identify as being of
another gender will not be covered by the study. Social influences and inferences of
13
participants to discontinue a relationship are also considered to be the limitations of
the study as well because it will not be further elaborated. Terminologies such as
long-term relationship, heterosexuality, college heterosexual students should be
limited to the bounds of their indicated definition in the paper. Any aspect not
befitting of the scope is considered the limitation of the study thus future study
regarding these aspects not within the scope are highly encouraged for future
researchers.
Definition of Terms
Benefits
The things that can provide positive effects for the people engaged in a relationship
whether it is physical, intellectual, environmental, social, emotional, and economical.
Commitment
The term used for couples to refer to their investment with each other. They
devote themselves to staying with their partner in the long run.
Challenges
The difficulties that make a relationship hard to maintain. This includes the
problems of heterosexual couples that are considered threats to maintaining their
relationship.
14
College heterosexual students
The selected students who are actively pursuing their degree and identify
themselves as heterosexual who are in a relationship with the opposite sex within the
same age range of 18-26.
Couple
Individuals who are in a romantic relationship with each other where they use
labels of being a “boyfriend” or “girlfriend”. Their boyfriend or girlfriend can be
interchangeably called as “partner” or a “significant other.”
Experiences
The events that the participants underwent to maintain a long-term
relationship. These experiences are the relevant information and the in-depth
explanation for their encounters in life that will be used to draw data for the research.
Heterosexuality
It is the sexual attraction and only preference towards the opposite sex. The
participants in the study are heterosexuals who are in a long-term romantic
relationship.
Long-term
This refers to the duration of three years or longer when being in a romantic
relationship where the study will be based on this in terms of longevity.

15
Romantic Relationship
A monogamous exclusive relationship where labels or identifiers are used to
each other such as “boyfriend” or “girlfriend.”. It also implies that they are
romantically involved as a proof of their love for each other.

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Chapter 2
Review of Related Literature
Outcomes of being in a romantic relationship in Young Adulthood
Romantic relationships are essential to humans as they help with survival rate,
as well as to mental and emotional well-being. Sheehan Fisher (2021) discussed that a
person must build a connection of relationships because having social support is a part
of being a human. It also improves the quality of life. With the study of Mertika et al.
(2020), people are more interested in this during adulthood. There is also a positive
effect on happiness and well-being when people marry afterwards. Fisher explained
some benefits of relationships such as less stress, healthier behaviors, greater sense of
purpose, longer lifespan. Although Raypole (2020) counter-argued about the
increased less stress as explained by Fisher because she claims that the anxious
feeling of waiting for another person, and the expectation for the flirting to go well
can be a problem. Another negative outcome that Raypole cited is that people tend to
develop poor judgment to make an impression on the person that they love. The
amygdala and the frontal lobe are parts of the brain that helps to detect danger shut
down which is why warning signs or red flags of the other person can be
unrecognized when in love.
Meanwhile, the study of De Winter et al. (2021) presents that romantic
relationships negatively affect the academics of college students. The findings of this
study explain that aspirations to improve academically are made difficult or more
complex by engaging in such relationships. This leads to the conclusion of
considering taking in account decision-making processes before engaging in a

17
relationship while studying. Although this study is conducted primarily for
international students, it can also reflect or be in line with the findings of this current
research and participants. In the same manner, this research could also produce a
different outcome from the study mentioned and be used for future research.
Regardless, this study suggests that the academic view and aspirations of students can
affect their engagement to romantic relationships.
For other studies like the research of Seligman & Csikszentmihalyi (2014),
romantic relationships are being associated with well-being, self-esteem, and other
positive conditions that can be an effect of a healthy relationship by various studies.
Along with these claims, health and well-being is influenced by these positive
psychological experiences. Health and well-being were only associated with the
absence of illness and disability but currently, psychology has been involved in
determining such a state. Seligman and Csikszentmihalyi explained that studies of
conditions such as well-being, strengths, and quality of life are addressed from a
newly established perspective from positive psychology. It is also stated that optimal
psychological experience and function can be a key to understanding well-being.
These evaluations lead to well-being being associated with personal and social
relationships that involve positive psychology. Interpersonal attachment is essential
for humans, and romantic relationships are not an exemption (Lopez et al., 2019).
In the study of Mutansky (2015) romantic relationships were said to teach
lessons during adulthood. Some factors that are improved during this stage in a
romantic relationship include one’s communication skills, how to properly deal with
emotions, learning how to empathize with their partner as well as others, and
exploring the intimate needs of the body. Not only do these learnings which are
18
brought by engaging in a romantic relationship serve as the main foundation for it to
become long-term, it also has its fair contribution towards a person; especially a teen
or a young adult’s happiness, growth, and resilience. Having a relationship as a young
adult can improve their confidence. The article states that the youth have shown to
feel contentment with themselves if their romantic relationship is built by intimacy
and good communication. Closeness, trust, and support is cherished by younger
people and even more when they experience it with their partner. Teens and young
adults have actually been found to encounter more conflict with their peers and
parents rather than their partners. Furthermore, a romantic relationship also promotes
the sexual development of a person which is of great significance during adulthood. In
fact, a lot of the youth believe that sexual intercourse should only occur if one is in a
romantic relationship, and even if not, all sexual relationships are romantic, it still
does occur mostly in a monogamous one. When one is in a relationship it is inevitable
that conflicts arise, such as encountering the stage of being emotionally vulnerable
which may lead to separation. For some youth who are more sensitive to being
rejected, they will most likely experience having self-doubt and be buried with
despair. In contrast to a romantic relationship built by intimacy and good
communication, one which is built by constant conflicts, dating violence, and lack of
trust may only lead to severe depression and even anxiety.
Lopez mentioned in their study that romantic relationships play a huge role in
an emerging adult and adolescent’s development and are also a source of both
negative and well-being outcomes during those stages. Their study has found that
romantic relationships have a significant impact in improving a young adult’s well-
being such as creating a positive mindset and improvement with their overall mood.
19
Not only does it have contributions to their well-being, but it appears to have an
impact even more so when things don’t turn out well with their relationship. The
authors mention how the negative outcomes are far greater compared to well-being
outcomes as emotions such as loneliness, anger, despair and feelings of frustration,
anxiousness, and longing penetrate one’s mental state deeper especially with young
adults. Generally, the youth is often very ecstatic upon entering a romantic
relationship because it makes them feel a flush of passion and feelings of
responsibility for someone which is found to be something that emerging adults want
to feel at that age, however, upon encountering conflicts and negative outcomes some
of them choose to get out of the relationship to feel relieved of the emotions that they
appear to not handle very well during those stages.
As participating in romantic relationships is beneficial and motivating for
some, other students perceive this as a hindrance or burden. Schmidt & Lockwood
(2015) claims that college students' romantic relationships are considerably associated
with absences in class. Their study shows that engagement to romantic relationships
highly affects the odds of nonattendance to three or more class meetings in a semester
per course. This negative effect can be associated with positive effects that are
motivators to college students in participating in romantic relationships. Furthermore,
it can prove as well if academic performance is or is not a motivator for such action.
According to Orbigo (2017), as adolescents become more independent from their
parents, romantic relationships are rapidly becoming a source of emotional support for
most of them. Emotional development is influenced by romantic relationships and
experiences in them, both good and bad. People who describe their romantic
20
relationships favorably, for example, are often outgoing, at ease speaking their minds,
and capable of being more articulate. On the other hand, those who express their
experiences negatively may struggle with staying in a romantic relationship, have
trouble maintaining relationships as adults, and feel lonely. Adolescents and teens
may become sensitive to rejection, depending on relationships.
Romantic relationships in adulthood tend to give those who are involved a more
sense of maturity and development in understanding such relationships. Norona et al.
(2016), stated that based on relationship status, those who are still with their romantic
partners in adulthood referenced a higher social cognitive maturity or one's capacity
to balance the need of his needs and the partner for a mutual rewarding bond than
those who aren't but those who aren't scored higher in romantic agency or the ability
to adapt and cope on unpleasant emotions that are caused by romantic engagements.
Same study suggests that when it comes to gender, women referenced a higher
percentage of social cognitive maturity and romantic agency than men. This
concludes that maintenance of romantic relationships is rather important in being
mature enough to handle this kind of relationship as it develops one's social cognitive
maturity and coherence. On the other hand, experiencing separation with a partner
enhances an individual's capability of coping with negative emotions caused by
romantic relationships.
The outcomes of being in a romantic relationship during adulthood have its fair
share of positive and negative ones. An example of a negative outcome is engaging in
substance use with the influence of a romantic relationship. Angulski et al. (2018)
stated that romantic relationships are beneficial in understanding the causes of

21
substance use in emerging adulthood. Their study suggests that monitoring your
partner's behavior and a partner's antisocial behaviors are consistent predictors of
substance use. Although this study lacks other evidence, the association of romantic
relationships in adulthood and substance is still present and should be considered in
engaging in and maintaining a romantic relationship during adulthood. Furthermore,
monitoring is said to be a particularly consistent predictor of substance use and further
understanding within this behavior should be given enough attention.
There is an association between romantic relationships and sexual satisfaction
according to Maas and Lefkowitz (2014). Although their study didn't focus on sexual
esteem, it showed a particular pattern in sexual satisfaction with those who are in a
romantic relationship and those who aren't. The study suggests that adults who are in
a romantic relationship appear to be more satisfied regarding their sex lives than those
who aren't. In the same manner, college students who are in a romantic relationship
tend to experience greater satisfaction sexually than college students who are in casual
relationships or single. Although there is not enough evidence to support the
association between romantic relationship and one's sexual self-perception, it is
predicted based on the prior research that emerging adults who have spent more time
in a romantic relationships during college or are in a romantic relationship in more
college semesters would gain a higher sexual esteem and those who spent less college
semesters while engaged in romantic relationships would have less sexual esteem.
Long-term Romantic Relationships among College Students
In college, it is the phase where students experience numerous new things, and
this may include keeping an active social life and being engaged in a long-term
22
romantic relationship. According to Sandoiu (2017), married people and college
students differ in their rationale for staying in a relationship. Sandoiu described the
relationship between college students and said that people from this cluster are more
focused on the enjoyment in terms of bonding, and their compatibility of lifestyle,
whereas married people focus on the practical aspects of life such as family
responsibilities, investments, and wanting a relationship to progress and last for a long
time. Although the terms why both relationships of college and married couples end
doesn’t differ, and reasons like differences, deception, or the lack of affection towards
the other are factors why split ups happen.
While long-term relationships may be ideal, being in a romantic relationship is
harder to maintain compared to how it is perceived during social gatherings when
relatives or friends push individuals to meet people (Mustafa, 2022). Mustafa
elaborated that being in a long-term romantic relationship is often maintained
through: 1) Constant effort, 2) Meeting the needs of the other person such as giving
them affection or their partner being a support system to them, 3) Sharing money or
give gifts for one another. Challenges are also extensive as there are problems that
exist within and outside the relationship. However, the study of Hamlin (2018) about
conflict in long-term romantic relationships explained that arising problems are not all
negative. It can be unpleasant for couples, but there are positive influences that can be
acquired from these events such as development of communication from both parties
and handling similar conflicts better in the future.
Machia and Ogolsky (2020) said that there are several reasons why people
remain in long-term relationships, or why they leave. Similarly, to Sandoui, they
explained that satisfaction and dissatisfaction play a great role in relationships.
Hamlin also explained that dissatisfaction among couples only comes along when the
23
weight of the negative impacts, which results in distrust of one another. The study of
Kansky et al. (2019) also found that the affect of a person is significant to
relationships because people who are happier engage more and have shown a higher
competence in socializing than those who have a negative affect. Hence, they are
better with social relationships, especially the romantic ones because they have more
positive feelings which helps them regulate and decide rationally conflicts arise.
With romantic relationships among college students, one cannot be sure that it
shall be as positively influential as how it has been thought to be such as it being a
part of a student's life that can help with all the adjustments and conflicts that they can
or may encounter. Being in a relationship while being in one of the busiest and
hardest stages of a person's academic life; for sure that may only come with its own
set of hardships, and of which are considered by students who want to be in a long-
term romantic relationship. According to Newman (2020), there are a lot of tasks and
activities that are much harder compared to the previous academic stages which is
why a student is obligated to put a lot of effort and focus on their lessons and
activities. So, with the demands of time for the student's partner in having a
relationship, it may only complicate both their time together and can possibly reduce
their focus towards their supposed time for studies. In conflicts such as the demand
for time in a relationship, both must be able to establish communication and if they
fail in talking things through, it may only end up affecting both of them negatively.
On the other hand, while students are dedicated to their academic
responsibilities and romantic relationships, they exhibit and practice acts which
balance these two aspects. Many fail to achieve balance due to various influences that
affect their management. A study by Rhjin et al. (2018) showed that school both had
24
positive and negative impacts on tertiary level students’ relationships depending on
the supportiveness of their partners; focus was much better for students who had
supportive partners while difficulty in time management was experienced by students
who had less supportive partners. Class absences are twice as likely to happen for
those who are in romantic relationships according to Schmidt and Lockwood (2015).
Another study by Kasagga and Naikoba (2020) stated that when attitudes in a
relationship are not matched, it creates instability where something is overpowering
which leads to failure of either the relationship or the academic performance of a
student.
The study of Kuperberg and Padgett (2015) explained that relationships are
shaped by norms, whether it is cultural or age based. An individual living in a certain
area may not have similar beliefs to someone who lives far away or residing in a
different location, hence, affecting the longevity of a relationship. The norm in age
also differs as expectations for those who are still college are expected to continue
studying and date casually, but those in their late or early 20s are free to date and
expected to marry which pushes them to stay longer in relationships. They also avoid
casual hookups because older adults differ in mindset which makes them lean more in
being serious and prepared in case things progress to marriage.
It has been a principled concept for the past decades that marriage and
parenthood as critical signifiers of adulthood and a significant indication of life
development in a person as it is observed to happen in emerging adults (Tillman et al.,
2019). Typically, late adolescence and early adulthood. As in these times as people
are within these ages. People would be starting their professional lives and would start
to part or practice and apply independence from their parents. This stage in life is
25
critical in determining the outcome or the life of the person in the following years in
adulthood. Included in this development is the interest in long-term relationships.
(Halfon et al., 2018),
Heterosexual Romantic Relationships in Philippines and in the West
Cultures have an impact on how love and dating is perceived, and it differs
everywhere around the world because a person may be tied to a certain tradition
(Adinda, 2021). According to a study by Karandashev (2015), how romantic love is
expressed is related to culturally influenced features such as the interpretation of
thoughts, feelings and behavior of a person as various cultures ascribe different
meanings to these things. Historical and cultural traditions serve as foundations for
romance that is culture-specific expressed in many forms. The difference can be seen
in what is more emphasized when showing affection towards their partner; other
cultures place more value on implicit and indirect means of expressing love to a
romantic partner, while certain cultures emphasize explicit and direct approaches.
In the Philippines, dating culture can be complicated as it is incorporated with
different beliefs such as religion, history, as well as eastern and western cultures
(Devani, 2022). Devani cited a few traditions practiced by Filipinos, and the first of
them is how a man must initiate in asking for a date. In Philippines’ tradition, courting
or “panliligaw” is among the man and the woman, where the parents and the
“nililigawan” or the girl being courted are wooed by the man. This is the getting to
know stage where the man sets his best foot forward to impress the girl and her family
to gain an approval for them to be in a relationship. The decision is up to the woman
whether to say yes to proceed in a romantic relationship with the man, or to decline
26
his offer. The courtship can include a serenade, sending love letters or gifts, or serving
the woman by taking her home or visiting their home in a constant manner to show
respect.
In the modern times in the dating culture of Philippines, both heterosexuals
and members of LGBTQIA community utilize international dating applications like
bumble and tinder to find someone they are compatible with and to eventually build a
relationship with them (Torres, 2019). Torres also mentioned the use of online
messaging or video calling because the rise of technology gave people easier access to
dating like using the Messenger application by adults, as it is also cost-efficient and
convenient. Moreover, Labor (2020) revealed that online identities formed by young
Filipinos in mobile dating apps created self-presentation strategies that are both
enabling and self-constraining at the same, as self-censorship and idealization of the
individual’s positive characteristics and traits are expressed, regulated and shaped by
the systematic structure of online dating apps overall. In addition to this, Labor also
mentioned that online identity reflected the intentions and interactions of a user with
another.
The dating culture is similar to the West as they also have courtships and
situationships. The courtship ritual in the West is a duration where two individuals get
to know each other before they settle down to marry (White, 2021). White said that
courtship may vary to the culture; it can occur in the form of a casual date such as
going out and doing enjoyable activities together, or it can be for a longer period
where they date in preparation for cohabitation. Page (2019) claims that situationships
also occur where the relationship is vague. The boundaries are not clear, but there are
parameters that they can’t also date other people. Being in a situationship is not clear,
27
nor does it have labels unlike a long-term relationship, Page explained. The set-up
often makes an individual feel anxious, angry, frustrated, or worse, depressed,
because it is the relationship where they do not have a concrete plan on what to do
with the relationship, but still wants to keep the other person around. According to
Vandergriendt (2020), a situation ship is not necessarily bad because if both parties
are willing to communicate, the undefined relationship can eventually turn into a
labeled one. A person should also know what they want to avoid anxiety, and to turn
away from those that are not serving them.
In modern times, dating applications are also often used in the West. Diaz
(2022) explained that even though most adults are now utilizing dating applications, it
is still harder to find a potential partner compared to the earlier generations. In the
article, Dr. Jenn Gunsaullus, a sociologist of Pew Research Center, said that the
pandemic, political strife among countries, and climate change has an impact on
dating in the West, especially that the dating applications let people see each other as
“disposable.” Gunsaullus also mentioned that dating in the West using dating
applications makes it more convenient and easier, but the likelihood of keeping a
partner or being in a long-term relationship makes it harder.
In the Philippines, Tinder has been accepted by the market. According to the
article of Radic (2022) Filipinos are drifting away from the traditional dating styles
and expectations of older generations. Tinder’s survey garnered result of 73% of
Filipinos prefer casual dating and strolling, and this is useful as a hybrid between
speed dating and a hot-or-not app because it takes out the fear of rejection in dating. It
also allows users to send a message to those that have shown interest. Despite the low
28
smartphone penetration rate in the country, the app has gained popularity among
smartphone owners (Crook, 2016).
Based on the article of Ankush Bahugna (2018), relationships are hard, and the
failure rate is high because people are not prepared. Having to compromise and to do
the things that will make a relationship work is often discarded, which leads to
disagreement and failure of relationships among people. It is so easy for people to let
go and they give up easily when the wants and needs are yet to be met. Most people,
Bahugna explained, that excitement is often confused with love. People look for
someone to do things with, but not to understand and love them on a deeper level.
Although, for other Americans, dating applications are helpful for them, and statistics
from Pew Research Center (2020) have shown that three-in-ten U.S. adults used
dating sites and apps, and 12% if them successfully married and committed to their
partners, and the 23% went on a date with a person they met in an online platform.
Evident in the statistics, the engagement of adults from the U.S. are heightened with
present years (Anderson et al., 2020).
The study of Ellen Lamont on gendered dating (2020), the study generated
results that heterosexual men and women aims for the equality in terms of education,
career, and the chores to do at home. There are also old cultures followed such as the
man leads by planning and paying the dates. Whereas the LGBTQIA Community
members are more flexible and believe that there must be clear communication
between the parties, and it doesn't matter who pays or initiates the date. The focus of
LGBTQIA respondents in Lamont’s research are communication, negotiation, and
balanced relationships to keep the relationship going.

29
Synthesis of the Reviewed Literature and Studies
The gathered studies both local and foreign are important in providing
information that tackles a similar topic about the long-term heterosexual romantic
relationships in a collegiate level. As explained, the heterosexual romantic
relationship in Philippines and the West has similar ideas such as having a courting
stage, although applications are now prevalent given the technological advancements
in this modern age such as using dating applications or dating sites like bumble,
tinder, omegle, etc. Dating heterosexuals often expect their partners to have a give and
take, and they must be equal in terms of effort. There are also advantages and
disadvantages in being in a relationship where it is applicable for the college students,
such as it can be a source of stress for them and can affect their academic performance
in school as it must be maintained to continue being in a romantic relationship. It can
potentially affect the time that they are allotting to the relationship especially it must
be maintained. Although in the positive side, they are given help in the academic
aspect, and they are motivated to study well. Romantic relationships can also
positively affect their life in general such as improving their mental well-being and
improving their overall health, as well as make a good impact on their well-being and
self-esteem.
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Chapter 3
Methods
Research Design
This study utilized a phenomenological research design under the qualitative
method. Phenomenology is a research design that focuses on the investigation of
conscious events and experiences as a means of studying the world around us
(Creswell & Poth, 2013). This is used in the study of understanding the experiences of
heterosexual college students on being in a long-term relationship. This includes the
challenges that they have, their drive, and the benefits that they get and experience
with their partners. Furthermore, the dependent variable in this study will be the
experiences of college students as they will vary from every participant. The
independent variable will be the existing relationship of the students as it will stand
alone regardless of how motivated it is or maintained.
Participants
The study has a total of 13 participants. Three (3) of them were utilized to be
included in the pilot study, whereas the remaining 10 participated in the main study.
The criteria for the participants in the study are the following: young adults in
the age range of 18 to 26 years old, in college regardless of the year level they are in,
residing in Metro Manila, and identifies as heterosexual who is in a relationship with
the opposite sex. Also, the duration of their relationship must be at least three years or
above, their partner is also a young adult who can be pursuing a college degree, in the
working scene.
The participants that were gathered by the researchers have similar
experiences with other participants due to being in the same age range. The study
31
doesn’t limit the participants within the institution of Far Eastern University Manila or
its other branches, hence, participants can come from any school as long as it is in
Metro Manila. Those who are studying and residing outside of it are not qualified to
be a participant in the study as the setting is only limited to the aforementioned city.
The purposive sampling method is utilized by the researchers. According to
Campbell et al. (2020), purposive sampling is used to gather participants who fits the
criterion of the study where they are a good match for what the researchers are aiming
to know. With this sampling, it will allow the study to draw results that are relevant
and credible, as well as provide deeper and detailed information about the subject
matter.
The pilot study participants were chosen using the purposive sampling method
and there were no specified sexes for them, making it random. It also doesn’t limit to
one member of the relationship. On the other hand, the participants in the final study
are also chosen in the same manner but they were divided into both sexes – both men
and women. There was an equal distribution as there were 5 (five) men, and there is
also 5 (five) women to balance the sample.
Ethical Consideration
The methods that are made by the researchers are done with an involvement
with another human being, hence, ethical considerations are important in conducting
this study. By adhering to ethical guidelines, this protects the participants as well as
the researchers to prevent misconduct and harm.

32
Risk/benefit Assessment
The risks are: researchers have personal biases, but it is set aside and
experiences which should not in any way interfere to the study. The study will also
focus on the romantic relationship which may need the participants to draw ideas
from retrospect where it may trigger emotions, as well as tap into sensitive topics in
the interview. The study may also be perceived as too personal.
For the benefits, will have a better understanding of their relationship more as
it requires for them to recall and explain why they behave or act in a certain way in
their relationship. When recalling experiences, this also test their maturity on being
able to verbalize and explain reasons as to why and how the events in their
relationship occurred.
Informed Consent
The participants were given individually an informed consent form in which
they read and signed before choosing to participate in the study. The informed consent
form contains enough background information and ethical standards about the study.
It also highlights that participants have the free will to decline in joining the study
whenever they wish where it is assured that incidents like this will not be taken
against the participants. The informed permission covers the interview as well as the
recording of personal information.
Face to face interview
The study is done through face-to-face interviews with semi-structured
validated interview guides that will reduce any risk that can elicit a prejudice in the
said study. While the researchers ensures to follow safety protocols for the health of
33
our participants as well as the researchers, with this we also ensure that we have a
conducive surrounding that the participants can share their thoughts with the topic.
Confidentiality
The data gathered are handled by the researchers for safe keeping. All the data
gathered concerning this research are only used for the paper, and their identity will
be kept anonymous. The researchers, research adviser, researcher collaborator and
other personnel that would take part in the research are the only ones who has an
access to the. Proper disposal of the participants’ data will be done once the study is
finished through deleting it in the devices of the researchers, and even files that has
been uploaded will be deleted permanently. and getting rid of the physical forms filled
out through shredding or burning.
Debriefing
Immediately after an interview is conducted, the researchers conducts
debriefing with the participants to ensure that they are aware of their participation in
the study. Any questions from the participants are answered and addressed by the
researchers. This is also to show that the researchers are well educated with the
various methods on handling and interviewing participants. Validation of the
transcription are also going to be done the researchers by sending it to the participants
in ensuring that the data and verbal cues are correct.
Integrity and reliability data
The findings of the research are all reported with honesty. There is no
fabrication of the results and parts that may mislead a reader in understanding the
34
research paper. The researchers also partnered with credible validators for the
interview guide who ensured that questions used are valid, reliable, and ethically
constructed.
Instruments
The researchers are equipped with instruments to collect data. The main
instrument used is the semi-structured validated interview guide where it seeks to
answer the statement of the problems indicated in the paper. It also guides the
discourse of both the participants and the researcher in discussing their experiences
further in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship.
Procedure
The paper was presented to the Department of Psychology and gained
approval for the researchers to conduct the study. It was accepted by the board of
panels, and the researchers utilized the social media application, Facebook, in
recruiting participants who are studying or living in Metro Manila. They were chosen
depending on who fits most for the criteria of the study and who can provide data that
is relevant for the researchers. The researchers also recruited participants face-to-face
around Metro Manila when it was difficult to source online.
A pilot study was conducted where three (3) participants were needed, and 10
is used for the main study. The procedure is similar in essence for both, although the
pilot study is used to initially conduct what the researchers have at hand to see its
flaws, revise, and to conduct the final study in a more orderly manner.
35
During the pilot study, flaws were seen and this includes the availability of
participants and the time to conduct interview, the setting on where to hold it, how the
discourse will flow, and how the set up would be for the interviewer.
Given this, the researchers then found more effective ways to improve the
main study which includes conducting a one-on-one interview for the rest of the study
after attempting to have a grouped interview to have a uniformed rapport and follow
up questions for all across participants. Time management is also found significant for
all the interviews that will happen, as well as not having leading questions that would
contaminate the data. The questions are also elaborated properly so that the flow of
interviews are comprehensible for the end of the participants. The setting in conduct
the study are also put into consideration by the researchers to provide the participants
a place was conducive enough, hence making them able to think well and share their
experiences better.
The process of the main study is similar to what was done during the pilot
study, where it started after the researcher and the participants have a designated
location and date to hold the interview in their convenience. Before proceeding, the
researcher first provided an informed consent form where the terms of the study are
stated, letting the participant read it all as well as reiterating it to them by reading. The
form contains statements of their liberty to proceed or decline the study, their benefits
and risks, as well as how their data will be gathered and discarded after the study
ends. After the participant understands the Informed Consent Form and wishes to
continue, they are asked to sign form, as well as the personal data sheet where it is
used by the researchers to collect information such as name (optional), age, sex,
contact information, and a question to ask the longevity of the romantic relationship
of the participant. Both forms include full disclosure of the study including the
36
possible risks and the significance of their participation. Clarifications are also be
provided if the for questions or concerns regarding the study.
After the needed forms are filled out, the interview was held anywhere within
Metro Manila, depending on the availability and preference of the participant. The
researchers adhere to their preferred time and date to avoid distracting them, and to
not have a conflict with the course subjects they are attending in their respective
universities. There is also a utilization of the semi-structured interview questionnaire
about maintaining a long-term romantic relationship where was used as a guide in
drawing out experiences of the participants for it to serve as the data of the study.
When the interview session ends, a debriefing was made by the researchers where all
of what was talked about during the explanation of ICF is repeated, and it is again
mentioned that they can stop participating in the research if they wish to even if the
interview is already ended. A token of appreciation are also provided by the
researchers.
In ensuring the credibility of the research, the researchers uses data
triangulation to check the validity of the study. This also provides a deeper
understanding of the phenomenon of long-term romantic relationships, check the
overlooked codes and themes, and minimize the existing bias after conducting the
study. The researchers had three processes in triangulation such as: 1) Cross checking
within the group, 2) Validation from transcription from the participant, 3) Confirming
or contrasting with the findings of other studies from the RRL and other researchers.
With the data gathered by the researchers, safe keeping are made for any
physical forms signed by participants. They are kept securely in a locked cabinet
when unused, and only research members have access to it. The confidential data of
their interview are also stored solely in the devices of the researchers where it is only
37
used to code and analyze themes. There will be a proper disposal of the data once the
research is finished in manners such as deletion of files from electronic devices, as
well as shredding or burning their informed consent forms and personal data sheets.
The researchers understand the security practices where they will adhere to ethical
guidelines that promote the safety of data provided by the participants.
Data Analysis
The analysis of data from the phenomenological study conducted undergo
thematic analysis to configure patterns from the participants to deduce initial codes
that leads into revelation of specific themes that arose from data gathering. These
themes are beneficial for researchers that drew inferences that can verify the
motivators of maintaining a relationship among heterosexual college students.
The steps were as follows: (1) Applying a thematic analysis where it allowed
researchers familiarize the gathered data by transcribing and noting down initial
impressions. (2) Generated initial latent codes in selecting engaging features of the
data; assembled the data relevant to each code. (3) Explored themes that had a relation
to the coded extracts and laid out the blueprint for the thematic map of the analysis.
(4) A thorough review of themes helped the validity and reliability of the thematic
map constructed by the researchers. (5) Following the evaluation and refinement of
themes comes the construction of definitions and names for each theme. (6) Data
Triangulation. Interpretations are done after from final analysis with a written report.
This systematic structure of thematic analysis is most suitable in data analysis
of a qualitative data collection because it added precision of interpretation in the
complexity of data and strengthened the overall meaning of the research (Alhojailan,
38
2012). Moreover, it uncovers the relationship of concepts to be addressed in the
process.
39
Chapter 4
Results and Discussion
This chapter examines the study's quantitative findings as well as the
questionnaire's construction, results, and analysis of the qualitative data. To highlight
parallels and contrasts between this study and earlier studies and literature, the findings
are also presented in the context of prior research findings and relevant literature, when
appropriate.
Summary of Table of Themes and Subthemes
1. What are the experiences of heterosexual college students in maintaining a long-
term romantic relationship?
Theme 1: Emotions and Feelings in the Relationship
Theme Subthemes Example Quote
Participant 1, age 21, female:
“Minsan happy” (line 13).
Emotions and Feelings in
the Relationship a Happy or Happiness b Participant 5, age 23, female:
“For experiences, nag r-
range lang sa usually minsan
masaya, minsan malungkot.”
(lines 5-6).
40
“Minsan siya naman yung
Sadness c dahilan ng stress.” (line 13).
Participant 4, age 22, female
“May times naman talaga na
dumadaan sa lowest point
namin. Pero masasabi ko
naman na yung status nami
ngayon is okay and masaya
naman.” (lines 14-15).
Participant 9, age 23, male:
“Kumbaga, totoo yung
sinasabi nilang, ‘sa una lang
masaya lahat.’, and doon
yung part na after niyong
masolve yung problem. Doon
nagiging mas strong yung
relationship, and syempre
magiging mas prepared kayo
para.. kung ano man..
problems na susunod.” (lines
5-8).
41
Romantic excitement Participant 2, age 23, female:
or “kilig” d “Sinasabi nila nawawala na
yung sparks, pero sa amin,
parang mas nagiging deep
pa yung relationship
namin.”, “Mas nagiging may
spark pa siya- mas nagiging
sweet.” (lines 22-24).
Participant 3, age 22, “Pero
so far naman, since 4 years
na, parang napansin ko na,
base sa relationship namin is
parang chill lang. May spark
pa siya, mas nagiging
sweet.” (lines 22-25).
a
Emotions and feelings in the relationship are the experiences that has an emotional
manifestation to the participant whether it is happiness, sadness, and the feelings
where it can affect them on having experience where it can be either pleasant or not.
b
Happy or Happiness is when a person is in the state of joy where the feelings of
satisfaction on a certain action, event, or situation is the factor why this is felt.
c
Sadness can range from different emotional states such as being disappointed,
despair, or unhappiness and having a low mood.

42
d
Romantic excitement or “kilig” is a feeling where a person feels good due to the love
stimuli or being in love. The heart races, and there is a thrill around the person
romantically involved.
Theme 2: Bonding and Quality Time
Category 1 (with partner)
Maintenance of Participant 1, age 21, female:
quality time b “Kasi ano eh.. parang ‘yun yung
love language ko, like, quality
time ganyan, kaya mine-maintain
talaga namin ‘yun all
throughout.” (line 34-35)
Daily bonding Participant 2, age 23, female:
moments c “..pinakahappiest moment ko
ngayon is yung parang pag
gising namin sa umaga, isa't-isa
agad yung makikita namin,
parang ganon. So.. yung.. ang
saya kasi sa feeling na
pagkaagising mo.. Ang cheesy
[laugh], makikita mo agad yung

43
Bonding and Quality person na mahal mo, ganyan.”
Time. a (line 55-56)
“Happiest din kapag yung
nasespend kami ng time na kami
lang.” (line 31)
“Bebe time” (line 43)
“Happiest moments, sa tingin ko
yung every day. Once na
nakakapag usap kami kumbaga
gumagaan loob ko tapos
sumasaya ako.” (line 21-22)
“Like yung feeling na kasama mo
siya every day.” (line 34).
Going on dates. d Participant 2, age 23, female:
“Pag nag g-go on dates kami.”
(line 64).
44
“Siguro yung pag ano, nagdedate
nang biglaan. Kasi lalo na
ngayong college ang hirap na..
mag ano ng time.” (lines 37-38)
Participant 8, age 21, age 37-39
“…mahilig talaga ako magtravel
and alam ‘yun ng girlfriend ko
ngayon, and gusto niya rin na
sumama sa akin sa mga travel so
sinasama ko siya.” (lines 37-39)
Category 2 (with family)
“..pinakahappiest, siguro yung
Bonding and Quality kapag nakikihalubilo siya
Time kasama family ko.” (lines 30-32)
“‘Pag ano. Pagka ano, ‘pag
sumasama siya sa amin mga
family bonding namin.” (lines 40-
Socializing with 41)
each other’s Participant 4, age 22, female:
families. e “Siguro noong last year. One

45
time, na.. naisama ko sya sa
family celebration namin.” (lines
21-22).
“Yung time na nadala ko na siya
sa family reunion namin.” (line
58)
“Yung mga family outings pwede
na. Pag may family outing kami
sa side ko, as much as possible,
gusto ko siyang sumama and
pinapaalam ko siya sa mommy
niya.” (lines 40-44)
a
Bonding and Quality Time: Bonding is the process of nurturing a connection , how
we grow emotionally attached to another person. It normally comes gradually as we
spend more and more time with someone, and it frequently encompasses feelings such
as affection and trust.
Category 1 (with partner):

b
Maintenance of quality time is when there is a constant meeting between couples,
where they don’t let quality time gets disrupted even at busy times.
46
c
Daily bonding moments are those quality time moments between couples that occur
on a daily basis. It can be just being around with each other where the significant
other is, or enjoying each other company whether by doing nothing or things that the
couple enjoy.
d
Going on dates are moments where couples are typically alone for the purpose of
spending time with each other. They also bond through this, catch up with the lives of
each other, and get to know the other person in a deeper sense.
Category 2 (with family):

e
Socializing with each other’s families is when the parents, including the significant
other of the participant bonds with each other. It can be through family celebrations,
trips, dinners, or family gatherings. With this, couples enjoy as they can build a
relationship with their significant other’s family.
Theme 3: Relatedness of Feelings of Sadness and Conflicts
“Pag sad siguro ano.. pag may
misunderstanding kami ganyan
Individual kasi mag.. ano kami eh, parang
differences. b opposite attitude kami. Iba yung
kinalakihan namin, ganun.”
(lines 43-45)
47
Participant 2, age 23, female: “Of
course yung kapag nag aaway.”
(line 74)
Relatedness of Sadness “Sobrang hirap i-ano. Like,

a
and Conflicts almost evevery day nag aaway
kami dahil sa mga problems
Arguments c namin tapos yung mga
frustrations nung pandemic,
tapos hindi pa kami madalas
nagsasama, parang nagpipile up
siya” (lines 47-50)
“Kapag nagt-try siya na
magspend time sa akin, kaso ang
nangyayari is parang may

d
Busyness gagawin din siyang errand
kapag.. ‘pag inaaya niya ako. Eh
hindi naman sa ayaw ko, parang
kumbaga ang sa akin lang kapag
ganon, mas prefer ko aayain mo
ko hindi lang dahil parang---
parang nararamdaman ko kasi is

48
sinisingit lang ako.” (lines 54-
58).
“May nangyari na.. siguro.. ‘yun
din yung matatawag ko na
saddest moment because until
now, ramdam kong.. aware kami
na hindi kami totally accepted sa
Relationship not side ko.” (lines 28-31).
perceived well by
the family e Participant 9, age 22, male:
“Actually, twice na siyang nag
attempt na mag- na
makipagbreak. Twice na. tapos,
kasi yung- parang mom niya,
high expectation. Kumbaga,
honor- laging for honors kasi
siya noon. Parang, top ng buong
batch. Tapos, ang sagot- parang
sagot sa kanya ng mom niya.. ako
yung naging dahilan kung bakit
siya naging top 3.” (lines 24-29)

49
a
Relatedness of sadness and conflict is how both variables interconnect with each
other. As there is a conflict or different views between participants, emotional states
from sadness becomes present.

b
Individual differences are the more-or-less lasting psychological qualities that
separate one person from another and hence contribute to the definition of each
person's uniqueness.
c
Arguments in this sense is not physically involved, but arguing due to different
opinions while maintaining a respect for one another, enough to resolve it even
sometimes it gets heated.

d
Relationship not perceived well by the family is when participants are not fully
accepted by the family of their significant other. It can also happen the other way
around where the participant’s family doesn’t perceive their significant other well.
2. What are the challenges faced by the participants in staying in a long-term romantic
relationship?
Theme 1: Emotional Impact of Challenges in Relationships
Emotional Impact of Feelings of Participant 1, age 21, female:
Challenges in insecurity b “Tapos, minsan naman ayun nga,
Relationships a since opposite kami ng attitude,
hindi rin kami same ng love
language kaya minsan kapag may
misunderstanding kami may mga
napapa overthink ako. I feel

50
neglected. I feel insecure.” (lines
75-78)
Anxiety c Participant 1, age 21, female:
“Pero minsan pag sobrang lala
ano, hindi mo talaga maiiwasan
magiging anxious-maging anxious
tsaka ‘yun nga minsan pag hindi
niya paguusapan feeling ko I feel
insecure kasi ano pa bang gagawin
ko para pansinin mo’ko yung
ganun eh siya ayaw nga niya ng
ganun.” (lines 98-102)
Overthinking d Participant 1, age 21, female:
“Tapos, minsan naman ayun nga,
since opposite kami ng attitude,
hindi rin kami same ng love
language kaya minsan kapag may
misunderstanding kami may mga
napapa overthink ako. I feel
neglected. I feel insecure.” (lines
75-78)
“Sobrang nakaka-affect sa akin na
in a way, kasi ano.. ako.. may

51
pagkaoverthinker ba ganun, so
parang kunwari na.. gusto ko kasi
parang pag usapan na agad.”
(lines 81-83)
a
Emotional Impact is defined as the influence of circumstances to the emotional
health of a person, and in this context, comes from the challenges in the relationship
with common occurring emotions related to feelings of insecurity, anxiety, and
overthinking. The severity of challenges makes these particular states inevitable of
experiencing.
b
Feelings of insecurity pertain to the lack of confidence with uncertain circumstances
or situations perceived with danger or threat that mainly affect self-esteem.

c
Anxiety is the state of anxiousness from an overwhelming sense of fear that comes
along when the intensity of challenges is high.

d
Overthinking is the act of repetitive unproductive thoughts that are caused by
excessive worrying that may create irrational thoughts. It appears to happen with
unresolved conflict with their romantic partner.
Theme 2: Individual Differences during Resolving Conflicts and Decision Making
Individual Differences Individual struggles Participant 2, age 23, female:
during Resolving that affect the “‘Yun lang talaga yung pinaka
Conflicts and Decision- relationship challenge lalo na pag sabay
Making a dynamic b kami nagkakaron ng topak
parehas kami na f-feel na sad

52
kami tapos pag sabay ‘yun
parang syempre sabihin ko na
icomfort mo naman ako pero
siya sad din so sabihin niya
icomfort mo naman ako so mga
ganoong bagay yung mga
nagiging challenge sa
relationship namin yung
individual struggles namin.“
(lines 115-121)
“Yung mafefeel namin sa isa't
isa na kailangan namin ng care
pero ang hirap idemand kasi
may pinagdadaanan yung
partner mo.” (lines 121-123)
“…yung want mo ng care pero
hindi mo mademand kasi may
problema yung partner mo
parang almost don yung reason
kung bakit kami nag break hindi
dahil sa ibang tao hindi dahil sa
kung ano ano pang common
problems ng mga couples
ngayon.” (lines 126-129)

53
Personality that Participant 3, age 22, female:
differs from their “Pansin ko din sa kanya na
partner c hindi niya rin kaya verbally
sabihin kapag magkaharap
kami. Mas nakakapag-open siya
kapag through messenger or
ano, kahit tawag ganun.” (lines
120-122)
“Siguro ako kasi yung type na
very vocal ba. Gusto ko kasi
pag naiinis ako gusto ko
sinasabi ko na lahat ng emotion
nilalabas ko eh sya naman
parang opposite- kunwari na
imbes sabayan niya galit ko
parang mananahimik na lang
parang hindi na namin napag
usapan. Parang ayun parang
dun kami nag ca-clash kasi
nagkaroon kami ng
miscommunication.” (lines 74-
78)
54
“...biggest challenge is
changing my entire personality.
Kasi literal na noong past hindi
ko pinapansin yung emotional
side ko. Like nirarason ko lahat
ng decisions and actions ko.
Syempre maa-apply ko din yun
sa partner ko. Since yung
partner ko mas focus siya sa
emotional stuff, sobrang
nahihirapan talaga ako mag
adjust tyaka ichange yung
personality ko.” (lines 57-63)
a
Individual differences are variations in personal characteristics of people that
manifest in many aspects of life. It is dominant during resolving conflicts, which is
the settlement of the argument at hand, and during decision making where choices to
be made are considered carefully in the romantic relationship.

b
Individual struggles that affect the relationship dynamic discuss the personal distress
of a person in the relationship which can happen simultaneously with their partner. In
instances where one or both are struggling with personal problems, demands are held
back that causes frustration to the person doing so; it is evident that there is difficulty
in demanding in similar situations for the sake of being considerate.

55
c
Difference in personality that comes in conflict with their partner is considered a
common challenge due to the contrast in how situations are managed that leads to
clashing against each other because of the miscommunication between them.
Theme 3: Hindrances in Maintaining Affection towards Each Other
Hindrances in Perception of parents Participant 9, age 22,
Maintaining Affection towards the relationship b male: “Sa mom niya, yun
towards Each Other a yung pinaka primary.”
(line 69)
“Nabanggit ko yung
kanina yung- pinag b-
break kami. Dalawang
beses nangyare 'yon” and
“in terms sa family
naman niya, parang
affected kami in terms sa
kung pano kami kumilos
ng matino ganun” (line
85, 88-89)
Different time schedules c Participant 5, age 20,
female: “Kasi ayun nga
bihira na lang magkita
tapos kung magkikita man
saglit lang.. kakain lang,

56
date lang. Kung magkikita
man, occasion lang-
yun.” (line 36-38)
Participant 8, age 21,
male: “The challenges or
problems, siguro time and
effort. Kasi yung
pandemic din nag away
din kasi kami non na, lagi
nalang ako yung nag-
aadjust.” (line 91-93)
Complacency d Participant 3, age 22,
female: “Ang mahirap
lang sa pagmemaintain
na na- encounter ko is
hindi minsan namin
napapansin both na
nagiging kampante na
kaming masyado na
parang hindi na namin
iniisip na kailangan na
pala minsan yung
romantic gestures para

57
magkaspark ulit.” (line
72-75)
“Yun lang kasi, kapag
naging komportable ka
kasi, minsan parang
iisipin mo... kunwari
parang iisipin mo ‘okay
lang na gawin mo ‘to
kahit ‘di niya alam’ yung
mga ganoong bagay ba.”
(line 89-91)
Financial Instability e Participant 7, age 23,
male:“Siguro yung
financial kasi students pa
lang kami pareho. Income
namin sympere nakabase
doon sa parents
namin.”(line 69-70)
“Nagbibigay din ako sa
kanya ng financial
assistance kasi hirap na
hirap na din kami mag
provide ng sarili naming
pera.” (line 135-136)

58
a
Hindrances in maintaining affection towards each other in a relationship are
instances that delay the giving or receiving of expressions of love that are influenced
by behavior, people, priorities, and insufficiency. Specific complications in the study
regarding this matter include the perception of parents towards the relationship,
different time schedules, complacency, and financial instability.

b
Perception of parents of the people involved in the romantic relationship is expressed
as the personal views of adults towards the activities or choices done together by their
children with their romantic partner or by the mere establishment of the said
relationship base on how they perceive it. Restrictions can be imposed based on the
perception of parents which hinders the maintenance acts of affection in the
relationship.
c
Different time schedules are fixed or flexible hours of a person that require
completion of tasks or attendance of the individual that is usually part of a routine of
the responsibilities included in the role of the person. When schedules are mismatched
with their partner, maintenance of affection is a challenge to be achieved since less
time together transpires.

d
Complacency is the satisfaction of one in a situation or with oneself in which they
are unconscious of the risks and danger it imposes. Applied in romantic relationships,
this can lead to dissatisfaction of the relationship from the partner of one doing so.
Acts of complacency can jeopardize values and virtues built and agreed upon.
e
Financial instability is the unpredictable changes that happen in finances due to
factors related to spending. Funds from college students usually come from
allowances given by their parents and is allocated for the prioritization of academic
expenses, leaving the allocation for acts of affection lacking that is a challenge in
maintaining affection.
59
3. What benefits do college students get by being in a long-term romantic
relationship?
Theme 1: Companionship Built Through Couples
Theme Codes Example Quote
“Benefit din na ‘pag sa gabi may
kasama ka ‘pag bibili ka sa kanto
may kasama ka. ‘Yung
companionship ayun benefit din
‘yun.” (lines 193-197)
Participant 6, age 21, male: “Yung
little things na pagtulong niya
sa’kin. Yung pagiging nandiyan
Companionship built Partner Presence niya sa akin. Ako kasi sanay ako
through couples a b
mag-isa sa buhay. So ayaw niya ko
mag-isa.” (lines 197-199) “New
na gawain gusto niya may kasama
ako. Tapos sa lahat ng bagay ina-
assure niya na okay ako, na may
kasama ako, na alam ko gagawin
ko, at yung mga reminders na ‘oh
eto baka mangyari, baka eto baka

60
may makita kang ganito, baka may
kaharapin ka nanamang
problemang ganyan’. So kumbaga
nandiyan siya para i-guide ako.”
(lines 200-205)
“Syempre for me, college life is
hard compared sa senior high and
junior high days mo na you have
time to socialize—you have more
time to socialize I mean. Ngayon
kasi parang you need to focus
more on your career, on your
course, para sa future mo. And for
sure, may limitations ka sa
socializing. So, for me, naging way
yung girlfriend ko na parang hindi
ko na kailangan makipag-socialize
kasi andyan naman siya. Nafifill
niya naman yung needs ko sa
pakikipag socializing—” (lines
125-131) “At may mapupuntahan
ka ‘pag may problema ka din. ‘Di
ko alam kasi parang panget kasi

61
pakinggan yung emotional dump
mo siya, pero parang may
mapagkukwentuhan ka ng araw
mo. At the end of the day, may
makukwentuhan ka na ganito
nangyari sa class ko, ganito
nangyari sa ganyan ko, ganun.”
(lines 132-137)
Friendship-like Participant 2, age 23, female:
connection c “Yung friendship like yung
friendship namin. Worth keeping
so beneficial siya, ayun.” (lines
201-202) “...minsan nga
nakakalimutan namin na kami kasi
nagstart kami as friends. Doon
kami sanay, and sinasabi ko sa
kanya na, ‘Girlfriend mo ‘ko!
[laughs]” (lines 204-205)
“Tapos minsan, affection in terms
of.. pwede na rin siguro yung sa..
in terms of friendship. Minsan,
‘yun. Parang ‘pag.. pagka meron

62
kang di ma-open sa mga kaibigan
mo.. parang siya yung makakapag-
ano.. fulfill non.” (lines 118-121)
Participant 9, age 22, male: “Ayon,
kumbaga meron ka na rin parang
best friend na pinag k-kwentuhan
mo ng lahat. Instead na kine-keep
mo sa sarili mo, kine-keep mo from
families. So, ayun, lahat
napaguusapan, napagkwe-
kwentuhan, and nas-solve yung
problems.” (lines 120-124)
a
Companionship built through couples involves a created deep bond and connection
with a partner through shared experiences, availability, friendship-like connection,
and shared goals. Companionship fosters a sense of togetherness and understanding
which enhances the overall quality and longevity of the romantic relationship.
b
Partner Presence in the context of a romantic relationship refers to the level of
emotional and physical availability, attentiveness, and engagement that a partner
brings to the relationship.

c
Friendship-like connection in a romantic relationship is the bond and emotional
closeness that is similar to that of a close friendship. It involves a strong foundation of

63
trust, mutual respect, shared values, and a deep emotional connection that transcends
romantic angles.
Theme 2: Support and Personal Welfare
Academic Support Participant 1, age 21, female:
and Motivation “Mas napapadali talaga niya
yung buhay ko... So ayun siguro
yung benefit like- tapos minsan
pag in school, pag nahihirapan
ako sa quiz magpapa review lang
ako sa kanya ganiyan. So ayun,
maganda talaga siya I mean as a
Support and Personal support system tsaka sa
Welfare education na rin.” (lines 149-
159) “Like for example, may
kailangan- naalala ko noong last
sem may kailangan kaming mga
participant ganiyan, fit siya sa
criteria, so parang ang bilis-”
(lines 151-152)
“Ayun parang lagi kaming
nagtutulungan kasi kaklase ko

64
siya sa lahat so benefit na
classmate ko siya. Benefit sa.. na
parehas gumagana utak namin
sa mga school works, kapag may
FA. Parehas namin nasasagutan
kasi parang.. Anong tawag
‘doon? Ano tawag ‘doon..
productive kami together! So
yung benefits is productive kami
together. Mas kampante ako na
gumagawa kami pag
magkasama.” (lines 187-192)
Participant 8, age 21, male: “Pag
feeling down ako sa grades ko,
kino-comfort niya ako na kaya ko
‘to. Support in other aspects, like
she supports me sa acads ko.”
(lines 139-140)
“Kapag, in terms naman sa
academics. Kunwari, meron
siyang need sa akin na gusto niya
magpatulong sa powerpoint. Ako

65
gumagawa, tapos sa essay
magpapatulong ako sakaniya.”
(lines 109-112)
“For being a student, siguro
sobrang makakalimutin ko, siya
lagi yung nagpapaalala na ‘uy
may homework’, ‘uy may part na
hindi ka pa nagagawa sa grupo’,
ganun. Like lagi niya ako
pinupush mag-aral kahit sobrang
tamad ko.” (lines 93-96)
Convenience from Participant 1, age 21, female:
certain life “...uhmm late yung uwi ko sa
activities OD, late yung uwian ganiyan
may tagasundo ako para hindi na
ako mahirapan mag-commute
ganyan. Mas napapadali talaga
niya yung buhay ko.” (lines 153-
155)
“...kapag may hindi ako kayang
gawin, tutulungan niya ako.

66
Pagdating minsan sa bahay
kapag may—kasi wala d’yan
yung dad ko eh—siya minsan
yung gagawa. Ang benefit din
talaga kasi, hindi lang ako yung
nagbebenefit – pati yung mom
ko, ‘yung parents ko na
tumutulong siya sa bahay. Yung
dad ko kasi nasa ano.. nasa
barko. And may mga ano siya..
mga motor. Gusto niya lagi
pinapaandar, ganun, tapos
sinasabihan niya yung boyfriend
ko na paandarin. Nagchachat
sila, may sarili silang groupchat
na tatlo, yung mga ganung bagay
ba. Kumbaga yung sa benefit na
may magandang relationship na
nabuild siya with my parents is
nagbebenefit, hindi lang ako, pati
yung family ko. Tapos minsan,
uhm, nag ooffer siya, kapag
sobrang busy ko, kapag wala
siyang ginagawa, maglalaruin
niya yung mga aso ko or iwo-

67
walk niya. Acts of service talaga
yung kanyang ginagawa.” (lines
158-170)
Mental Well-being Participant 9, age 22, male: “Mas
healthy yung mental health kasi
kumbaga, mas napagusapan
namin ng openly yung problems
namin. Tapos, syempre nags-
share na rin nang nags-share
tsaka nag o-offer kami ng
tulong.” (lines 105-108)
Emotional/Moral Participant 2, age 23, female:
Support and “Kasi sometimes na f-feel ko
Motivation nagstrustruggle ako emotionally.
So parang ‘pag nakikita ko yung
mga ginagawa niya for me
parang mas ginaganahan ako
bumangon everyday.
Ginaganahan ako bumangon
like, ‘pag tinatamad ako. Or
parang.. anong tawag doon..
Parang pulling force ko siya
parang ganun. Minomotivate

68
niya ko in a way...” (lines 208-
212)
“Yung benefit na nakukuha ko sa
partner ko is.. isa kasi sya na
masasabi ko na.. pinagkukunan
ko ng moral support talaga kasi
parang, kahit ano yung mga
plans ko, talagang.. siya yung
nagsusupport sa akin ‘pag may
times na sobrang anxious ako-
sobrang nag d-doubt na ako sa
kakayanan ko, alam mo ‘yun,
parang may taong nagpapalakas
ng loob ko and ayun talaga yung
sa tingin ko na isang importante
rin talaga sa relationship. Tsaka
ayun, sa mental health mo, ‘pag
talagang may taong nakasuporta
sa’yo.” (lines 108-115)
“...more than that, support
talaga yung makukuha mo sa

69
kanya na parang pag may time
na sukung-suko ka na,
makukuhanan mo talaga siya ng
support na sasabihin niya “kaya
mo yan” Parang ganun- so ‘yun,
support.” (lines 97-99)
Individual Growth Participant 1, age 21, female: “It
teaches me a lot din. Syempre as
a Psychology student din,
parang.. ‘ah ganyan pala yung
nararamdaman ng ibang tao,
parang hindi pala lahat umiikot
sa mundo ko’, ganyan. Parang..
Nakaka ano rin siya.. parang
nakaka-open ng eyes [laugh].
Tapos like.. patience, ganyan.
Understanding. Parang ayun
yung mga benefits- ay parang
ganun nakaka-affect yung
benefits. Mas nagiging stable ako
as a person.” (lines 176-182)
“‘Pag ako lang gumagalaw, isip

70
ko lang, point of view ko lang
yung nakikita ko, pero yung
nakikita ng iba hindi ko nakikita.
So kumbaga siya yung
nagpapakita sakin kung ano yung
nakikita ng iba.” (lines 205-207)
“Kumbaga ano, a different
perspective sa mga bagay. Kasi
kung yung mga problems
aaksyunan mo ng naiisip- ng
sariling perspective mo, which is
hindi naman masama 'yun, pero
if titingnan mo lahat ng anggulo
sa isang problema ganun,
maghahanap ka ng ibang opinion
diba mas magkakaroon ka ng
maayos ng pag-solve ‘dun sa
problem.” (lines 141-146)
“At the same time, naging open
ako sa mga options sa buhay.
Mas naging, ano ba? Ano yon,
opportunities to grow.” (line
160)
71
“You let yourself feel emotions
again and ma-a-addict ka sa
feeling na maging emotional and
since ayaw ko ng ganun, yung
main motivation ko not to
explode from emotions is yung
partner ko.” (lines 103-106)
a
Support and Personal Welfare is when the partner helps their significant other in order
to make their lives easier or better; whether it is financially, physically, mentally, or
even emotionally. All in all, this is a certain act of service that is willingly provided by
one as a symbol or way of showing their love and care towards their partner.
b
Convenience from certain life activities is when the assistance that one receives from
their partner makes their life better and easier.

c
Academic Support and Motivation encompasses the partner’s acts when they help their
partner with their academics, this help can vary from helping with finishing their
tasks/activities in school or making PowerPoints for them. As for Motivation academic-
wise, this is when one sees their partner as a motivation to do well with their academics
and serve as an inspiration to go to school and finish their studies.

d
Mental well-being is when a partner feels that their partner is the reason why they feel
that their mental health has improved. Their partner’s support makes them feel mentally
stable.
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e
Emotional/Moral Support and Motivation incorporates the emotional and moral
assistance that a partner provides including their role as one’s motivation. When one
feels the struggles and pressures of life especially as a college student who needs to
balance their academics as well as other things in their life, the partner serves as a
vessel that eases their stress and frustrations because of the emotional support and
moral boosting that they provide. A partner becomes the symbol of motivation for one
to get up every day and do well with their studies.

f
Individual Growth is when one is influenced by their partner to be a more stable
person that is open to other’s perspectives and is open to ideas that are outside of their
comfort zone. The partner becomes someone that influences one to become a better
person, that is patient and understanding of others and oneself composed and not
letting their emotions get the best of them.
Theme 3: Connection of Satisfaction and Maintaining the Relationship
Emotional Needs b Participant 4, age 22, female:
“...isa kasi sa mga tinitignan
ko sa isang tao is yung
treatment niya ba sa akin, so
kunwari maayos yung
treatment niya.. nahahandle
niya rin ako nang maayos.
Isa ‘yun sa mga factor na
kinoconsider ko kung bakit
kaya nag s-stay kami kasi,

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Connection of Satisfaction syempre aminin natin na may
and Maintaining the times na nagiging toxic. Pero
Relationship a yung partner ko kasi alam
niya paano ako ihandle yung
mga mood swings ko and all.
Kaya ayun, kaya rin siguro
tumagal din kami.” (lines
101-106)
“Una syempre, yung love, ‘di
‘yun mawawala. ‘Pag mahal
mo naman yung tao, syempre
ano, uhm.. mags-stay ka.
Pangalawa yung ano for me..
yung trust niyo sa isa’t-isa.
And.. trust kasi, pag wala
kayong trust for sure ‘di
kayo magtatagal kasi
maghihinalaan lang kayong
dalawa. And pangatlo ano,
uhm.. pagiging loyal na rin
parang sa sarili mo. Sa sarili
mo parang.. kami, di kami
nagkikita, so parang dapat

74
sa sarili mo parang alamin
mo na.. na loyal ka if ayaw
mong magkaroon ng
problema yung relationship
niyo.” (lines 102-108)
“Siguro affection. Affection,
kasi.. ‘yun nga kasi nags-stay
ako diyan mag-isa sa dorm
tapos bihira lang kami
magkita ng parents ko. So
kahit through virtually,
nabibigyan niya ako ng
affection. Parang yung
longingness ko sa parents
ko- parang siya yung
nakakapagbigay din.” (lines
114-118)
“Nakita ko sa kanya na
sobra siyang dedicated,
committed sa relasyon
namin. Kahit pagod siya,
kahit may kailangan siyang

75
gawin, nandiyan siya for
me.” (lines 177-179)
“Kasi yun dapat yung isang
factor sa relationship, yung
honesty. Kahit makakasit—
masasaktan mo man yung
partner mo, at least honest
ka hindi ka nagsinungaling.
Kasi ganun yung gusto kong
relationship na it’s built on
trust and honesty.” (lines
146-150)
“...yung warm feeling nung
love.” (lines 96-97)
“And syempre [laugh],
sinabi niya before yung
sexlife benefit yon kasi
before maging kami… Like
syempre pag gusto mo
isatisfy needs mo like wala

76
ganyan puro FuBu lang, so
ngayon katabi mo na agad.”
Sexual needs c (lines 197-200)
“Syempre, hindi naman
mawawala yung, tawag dito?
Yung intimacy tsaka yung sex
life, which is exciting. Totoo
yung sinasabi ni Abraham
Maslow? Yung ano, yung sex
is a parang primary need ng
isang tao. So, kung hindi mo
makuha, sa iba mo siya
hinahanap. Hinahanap mo
siya sa sarili mo, sa ibang
tao- ibang babae ganun. So-
tsaka kumbaga, depende din
siya kung gaano ka content
yung isang tao. So kung
hindi siya contented sa
partner niya, talagang mag
hahanap siya sa iba.” (lines
147-156)
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a
Connection of Satisfaction and Maintaining the Relationship influences the overall
health and longevity of the relationship in terms of how much the individual’s
emotional and sexual needs are met. This involves the overall level of contentment,
happiness, and fulfillment that both partners experience in their relationship.

b
Emotional Needs in a romantic relationship pertain to the psychological and
emotional requirements that an individual seeks to have fulfilled by their partner. This
involves affection, intimacy, trust, security, and contentment, among many others.
c
Sexual Needs in a romantic relationship refer to the sexual engagement that an
individual seeks to have fulfilled by their partner. This involves expectations,
frequency and quality of sexual activity related to intimacy and satisfaction.
Discussion
Emotions and Feelings in the Relationship
Interacting with others affects lifestyles and interactions with others (Cherry,
2022). Across relationships, emotions are related to how a person acts and relates with
others, and even people who are in a long-term romantic relationship. The first theme
determined by the researchers is the emergence of emotional states. There may be
basic types of emotions, but in most participants, they talked having positive and
negative experiences which led the data to have codes of happy experiences or
happiness, sadness, and having a romantic excitement or the “kilig”, an adjective that
makes a person thrilled and elated due to their romantic experience (Tan, 2016).
There are also mentions of stress that is obtained on the participants’ end, may it be
from the significant other, or external sources.
In the happy moments of couples, they often mention that relationships start in
an elated state where the “kilig” is heightened given that most of their experiences are
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new to each other. Quality time is prominent, as well as romantic gestures, and the
affection that is given by their partner. Feelings between couples are also fresh, and
they are still learning how to navigate within relationships. Sadness and stress come
when the romantic relationship progresses because they are already facing a lot of
setbacks. They are also in the state of exploration regarding managing conflicts and
maintenance of satisfaction while exploring their partner’s communication style to
better solve the occurring problems that lead in strengthening and deepening the
relationship.
Bonding and Quality Time
Most participants mentioned that bonding is important to them. Given that
college life gives them a lot of workloads, so when they get a chance to spend time
with their significant other, it contributes to their happiness. Bonding or quality time
is the togetherness of a couple; partners provide “undivided attention” to show their
affection and love for each other.
The themes for this section have two subthemes such as bonding with the
partner, and bonding with the family. For the bonding with the partner, time includes
dates, normal events, traveling together, spending time in campus, or just being in
each other’s presence. On the other hand, the bonding with the parents or family are
also prominent in the participants’ interviews whereas they say they feel proud and
happy whenever their significant other is connected and can spend time with their
family because they feel accepted.

79
Relatedness of Sadness and Conflicts
Conflicts can be experienced with anyone, and in this context, participants
face problems that come from the internal or external aspects of life which affect their
relationship and emotional state. For this, the key theme is the relatedness sadness and
conflicts in relationships because there is discomfort present, and it also impacts the
mental well-being of a person.
Participants relate sadness to the setbacks that they went through. Most of
them are similar where they perceived compromised quality time as the saddest point
in their romantic relationship. As a young adult, participants or their partners have
heavier duties to fulfill especially when they are mostly in college, and some of them
also work such as having a part time job. With this, participants tend to forget that
they still need to spend time with their partner due to being comfortable in the
relationship that leads to lack of moments of bonding with each other. This also
sometimes causes misunderstandings or conflicts that sadden participants.
Familial issues also show importance in this topic where some of the
participants see it as the saddest moment or point. Not every participant is accepted by
the families of their partner, or it can be the other way around where their family does
not approve of their significant other. Family members’ intrusion between couples
becomes a conflict, and consistent intervening leads to almost parting ways,
misunderstandings, and problems that drag along the course of the relationship.
Emotional Impact of Challenges in Relationships
Some participants exhibited a biosocial approach to emotion regulation that
emphasizes social elements significant predictors of psychological consequences, in

80
addition to individual components such as emotional reactivity and regulation. The
study's central premise places much emphasis on romantic partner connections.
According to Uniyal (2023), efforts must be made consistently because
challenges are inevitable in couples, and there are no “shortcuts” in engaging with it.
One of the themes being assessed is the emotional impact of challenges in
relationships. Based on the participants’ responses, subthemes that have emerged are
feelings of insecurity, anxiety, and overthinking whenever there are conflicts or
problems that occur within the relationship. For the feelings of insecurity of the
participant, it is one of the challenges that is rooted from individual difference. As
mentioned, they have different love language from one another that affects the
emotional aspect of the participant where feelings of insecurity also get involved.
Schafler (2020) explained that love language is how an individual shows their
love, and how they want to be treated to feel loved. In the participants’ perspective,
when the expectations or the way how the challenge is not done by her way, there is
an uncertainty whether the partner still likes her. The participant also mentioned
anxiety and feeling anxious when problems are not being talked about, given that her
partner prefers to calm down first before settling the issue, whereas on her part, it is
the opposite. In addition to this, not only the two were mentioned, but also,
overthinking emerged as a subtheme since the participant dislikes the state of not
knowing or being shut down. Participant 4 on the other hand also expressed having
the similar trait of rushing to talk to their partner after a fight, otherwise it causes
overthinking.
Although validation from the significant other is also a factor to the emotions
of the participants because it has been demonstrated to diminish moderate to high
levels of negative emotional arousal, but invalidation has been shown to sustain or
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aggravate levels of negative emotional arousal. When one is having anxiety or
dealing with insecurity, it can be difficult to muster the energy and goodwill necessary
to sustain healthy relationships. Nothing often seems interesting during a down
moments, and one may lack the energy or motivation to accomplish anything. Hence,
when the partner asks for anything, it could feel difficult, burdensome, or even
irritable. Relationships can occasionally result in emotional abuse. Relationship
problems might affect our daily life when they arise frequently or severely.
Individual Differences during Resolving Conflicts and Decision-Making
Expression of individuality during the process of decision-making and
problem solving were considered challenges for both parties in the relationship as the
differences made a common ground harder to achieve for better understanding. Some
of these individual differences include the personal struggles they have affecting the
relationship dynamic and their personality traits that clash with their partner. Results
showed that there is hesitance in demanding wants for the sake of consideration of
their partner’s circumstances which causes frustration. Moreover, the communication
styles of those in a long-term relationship are not always the same despite years of
being together, causing miscommunication in the process. Most of the time, the
change required to solve communication problems involves altering oneself that is
often inconvenient in compromising for the wellness of the relationship.
Hindrances in Maintaining Affection towards Each Other
Field (2022) explained that affection is liking and caring for a person, and to
be able to show it, gestures are done so that the person on the receiving end will know
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that they are loved. Although affectionate gestures may vary from one person to
another, given that it can be shown through numerous behaviors.
Affection between lovers is one of the reasons why romantic relationships are
continuous and prolonged as individuals feel happiness in giving and receiving it.
However, in the process of giving and receiving, there are impediments in
successfully doing so. Results showed that the hindrances in maintaining affection
root from the perception of parents towards the relationship, different time schedules,
complacency, and financial instability.
The views of parents were significantly affecting the relationship as the factor
of approval from the family is important in Filipino romantic relationships; any
disapproval from those who have authority in their household is respected but is
frowned upon by the participants who experienced this. According to the participants,
reasons for disapproval were usually about their involvement in a romantic
relationship at a young age.
Different time schedules affected opportunities to be together, especially when
there are restrictions in the environment whether it is from COVID-19 safety
protocols or from strict parents. Along with this is the challenge of exerting effort to
make ways of giving and receiving affection despite the mismatched schedules.
Complacency is said to be a hurdle in sustaining affection as it makes them
unaware of what is lacking in the relationship because of the satisfaction of the status
quo. Moreover, complacency gave more freedom to behavior that was inconsiderate
to their partner, such as doing whatever they liked without consulting their significant
other if it was fine, forgetting about the risks and danger of doing so.
Lastly, financial instability limits the ways that affection is given and received
as most activities like dating, travelling, or eating out require enough money. Since
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the participants are unemployed students who depend on their allowances given by
their parents, it is a challenge to allocate funds for the enjoyment of the relationship.
The struggle in funding is only experienced by students who are well off, with
families funding them, and family members abroad or have local businesses.
Companionship built through couples
Based on the results that have been garnered through theme generation,
companionship gained between couples contribute to what seems to be the perception
of people as a benefit that is received out of being in a long-term relationship. It
encompasses partner presence and friendship-like connection.
Partner presence is another one that is nonplussed to be found in a relationship
that is long-term in the participants. With their time spent with getting to know about
each other, they are having high levels of comfortability for one’s partner is expected.
The participants experience allowed them to feel at ease and free from all of one’s
inhibitions and not having to feel reserved. Moreover, feeling comfortable with one’s
partner allows one to reveal their true self. Jacobsen (2021) mentioned in their article
that couples gradually show their true selves as they go further into the relationship
since they already reached a certain level of comfortability which is built by
understanding and trust. In the process of getting to know each other, revealing
oneself is also through sharing experiences and feelings that they accumulated over all
that time together.
Partner presence, of course, differs from one person to another. For the
research participants, having a bond or a level of comfort is like having a friend even
though that person is their partner, it contributes very well for a person to
communicate better with their partner. Aside from that, seeing as there is a friend-like
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connection, that whole idea just makes the relationship more than just love and
intimacy, it creates bonds that bound the couple together and helps them see common
things they have with each other and learn how they can better enjoy each other's
company without making it all about love.
Support and Personal Welfare
Results show that there are many benefits that couples get from each other.
One of the many benefits is the support and personal welfare as a college student in a
long-term romantic relationship is the academic support. A partner was be helpful
when it comes to sharing their knowledge, especially if they tackle the same topics.
Aside from this, participants also ask their partner for a favor to lend a hand with
tasks or activities for school.
Next is, convenience from certain life activities. A participant opened about
the different things where one’s partner can help them with. These certain life
activities vary from getting picked up from school when they are dismissed late,
getting help them with house-hold chores, etc. These initiations which are consider
acts of service in a love language positively affected the participant and benefitted
them by being eased from stress because of the convenience brought by their partner.
A partner’s act of service made her feel she was they cared for.
Also, drawn in the participants answers is that they get into a relationship with
someone that they trust and someone they enjoy spending time with. It is evident that
moral and emotional support are provided by the significant other when conflicts or
problems arises. The support obtained in the relationship positively affects couples
where it becomes a foundation of a strong relationship, and makes them strengthened
especially at times when things are harder to process mentally.

85
A long-term relationship also teaches couples to acknowledge their partner
through understanding their feelings and point of view where it contributes to their
growth as a person. Lewandowski (2022) states that people have the tendency to have
more value for partners who help them grow and push them to be their better version.
Connection of Satisfaction and Maintaining the Relationship
The satisfaction in maintaining the relationship showed that it goes beyond the
basic needs where the satisfaction comes when it is met or done by both of the person
in the romantic relationship. The kinds of satisfaction identified are emotional needs
and sexual needs.
The study of Campbell et. al (2015) implied that emotional needs, such as
intimacy, security, and satisfaction play a crucial role in long-term relationships.
When it comes to one’s emotional needs, one yearns for affection, security and
contentment from their partner among others. This influences how a partner interacts
with and treats their partner in terms of their emotions, feelings, and overall well-
being. Emotional needs in the study are met by the participants’ partners where there
is a fulfillment on their end when they receive it from their loved one.
Results showed that there is a connection between how participants gets
satisfied in the relationship and their reason why they maintain the relationship.
Subthemes emerged in this topic such as the emotional needs and the sexual needs.
According to the participants, since their needs are met in the relationship, it allows
them to stay. Participant 4 noted that her partner knows how to handle her personality.
There is also an emotional fulfillment on making up after a fight. With this, her needs
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are met and she is satisfied on the turnout of the events and the dynamic in their
relationship.
Another participant mentioned that there is trust between her and her partner
where they are able to last long because there is a share of responsibility between the
couple in maintaining the relationship where they are able to be satisfied in
maintaining it because they also love each other. Other concepts are also mentioned
such as honesty, dedication, and love where emotional needs are met in the
relationships of the participants.
The other subtheme is sexual needs where they fulfill their desires through
their partner. It was described as a primary meet wherein one is satisfied with their
sex life, they will continue to stay in the relationship. Given that the participant
mentioned that he is contented, this allows him to stay and not look for other girls.
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Chapter 5
Summary, Conclusion, and Recommendations
The study was conducted to have an in-depth understanding about the
experiences of heterosexual couples in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship
as college students. In gathering the data, face to face interviews were done around
Metro Manila by utilizing a semi-structured interview guide that served as an
instrument. With it, it assisted the researchers to conduct the study in an orderly
manner where they drew relevant answers from the participants regarding the topic.
There were 10 participants for the main study- 5 males, and 5 females who are in 3
years and above duration of romantic relationship. On the findings of the study, the
researchers presented three (3) themes per statements of the problem; narrowed down
from all the concepts that surfaced after the researchers coded, patterned, and
triangulated the data that was gathered.
The themes generated under the statement of the problem 1 where it answers
the overview of experiences in long-term romantic relationships of heterosexual college
students. It discusses the complex interplay of emotions in romantic relationships,
highlighting subthemes such as happiness, sadness, bonding, and conflicts. In the early
stages of a relationship, couples experience excitement and happiness, but as the
relationship progresses, challenges such as demands of college life and familial issues
may lead to sadness and when unresolved, turn into conflicts. Bonding, both with the
partner and with family, is seen as crucial for relationship satisfaction, while conflicts
strain the relationship. Understanding how these emotions form and factors that affect
88
relationship dynamics can provide valuable insights into the complexities of romantic
relationships.
Identification of the challenges inside the said relationship is inquired by
statement of the problem 2, whereas the themes highlight various challenges in
romantic relationships, including the emotional impact of challenges, individual
differences during conflict resolution and decision-making, and hindrances in
maintaining affection towards each other. The emotional impact of challenges
emphasizes the significance of social elements, such as parent-child or romantic partner
relationships, in addition to individual components like emotional reactivity and
regulatory competence. Individual differences, including personal struggles and
personality clashes, can hinder the process of decision-making and problem-solving,
leading to miscommunication and frustration. Hindrances in maintaining affection stem
from factors such as parental disapproval, different time schedules, complacency, and
financial instability. These challenges, ranging from emotional issues to practical
constraints, can impact the dynamics and satisfaction of romantic relationships,
requiring effort and understanding to navigate and overcome.
Lastly, the benefits gained from the relationship under the statement of the
problem 3 generated themes that tackled certain benefits gained between long-term
relationships. Partner presence and friendship-like connection contribute to the
perception of companionship as a benefit. Feeling at ease and revealing one's true self
with a long-term partner is expected, and having a friend-like connection creates bonds
that bind the couple together. Support and personal welfare, including academic support
and emotional support during difficult times, are also significant benefits. Improving
89
mental well-being, acknowledging each other's feelings and perspectives, and
individual growth are outcomes of having a supportive partner. Satisfaction in
maintaining the relationship comes from emotional treatment and sexual needs.
Emotional needs obtained in affection becomes a craving that couples want to receive
from each other, as well as contentment in life, derived from the relationship, is a
valuable benefit that contributes to overall happiness, and meeting sexual needs brings
satisfaction.
Conclusion
The experience of heterosexual college students in a long-term relationship is
a complex journey that mainly revolves around growth, in a sense where particularly
learning and deepening their relationships through resolving conflicts, satisfying
needs and companionship. This growth builds their sense of identity, expression of
love and bonding behavior towards each other as they become more mature in
handling conflicts and overcoming challenges in the relationship. Moreover, the
influence of the willingness and encouragement to grow comes from the support of
their partner. People would stay in the relationship when the perceived treatment from
their partner fits their standards of what is right. Treatments such as support, show of
affection, and spending quality time together may strongly manifest a long and strong
relationship.
Recommendations
The study indicates that growth, affection and managing conflicts are key
factors in maintaining relationships, however, it is only limited to its definition and
not its particularities. Further study is needed to know what the certain experiences
90
and happenings are of each factor as different scenarios tend to lead to different
actions and experiences. It is also advisable that future studies regarding the topic
deepen the scope of the background of the participants in terms of their personality
and maturity. Previous experiences in dating and their impact on their identity should
be explored as building blocks for who they are as a person now. Studies regarding
maintaining long-term romantic relationships should include both partners to get both
views of the relationship and to get deeper sense of how individualism affects the
romantic relationship between heterosexual couples.
It is also advisable to quantify this study to further prove the points of the
result for more substantive evidence for future literature given the small amount of
relatively new studies about the topic. It is recommended that other findings such as
parental involvement, love language, communication style are looked upon by future
studies.
Reflexivity
The process of data gathering was simple, setting up a meeting that would be
held for less than an hour, typically not lasting more than 30 minutes. However, in
terms of analyzing data the researchers took their time with the processes needed to be
done in analyzing qualitative data that is harvested via interview
The process of data gathering was simple, setting up a meeting that would be held for
less than an hour, typically not lasting more than 30 minutes. However, in terms of
analyzing data the researchers took their time with the processes needed to be done in
91
analyzing qualitative data. The researchers had to manage our time carefully as
external factors outside the study such as other academic and personal responsibilities
had delayed the researchers in accomplishing their tasks on internal deadlines.
Belesta, Johanna S.
Maintaining a romantic relationship for long-term couples revealed the tedious work
towards overcoming challenges and significance of benefits in the personal lives of
both individuals. The efforts exerted in the relationship tend to be sacrificial that leads
to investing in their partner more. As the population of the study focuses on college
students, my observations towards the challenges and benefits were limited to the
environment of academic and familial related aspects. Futuristic goals were career
oriented for most of the participants that were mostly influenced by their families. The
findings formed from thematic analysis are somewhat similar to research abroad
regarding long-term romantic relationships with the difference of Filipino culture
inclined with ours. The foundation of similarities is yet to be explored and the sources
of instigators are yet to be determined.
Diza, Angel M.
Having and maintaining a long-term romantic relationship shows that there will be
always problems and challenges that will come their way. Even though challenges
may arise there will always be a way to surpass them. There will be significant
benefits that every partner has. These findings mostly are limited to academic and
familial challenges. Knowing how the participants share how they handle every
challenge that comes their way, also makes them realize how far they are already in
the relationship and how they managed to stay in times of challenges

92
Espino, Danielle D.
The semi-structured interview questions are devised to know more about the moments
of long-term romantic relationships that happen behind the scenes, not just what is
seen through the naked eye. There are similarities with the researchers’ experiences
and the participants as some of us are in a relationship while some of us are not, and
being a college student was also our common denominator. The participants
expressed themselves well, and as observed, there is a hint of happiness when talking
about what their experiences are with their partner, given that they survived and are
still striving to keep their relationship lasting longer. Mentions of having a hard time
while juggling academic life and romantic relationships was evident, but also there’s a
visible mutual understanding between couples that as a young adult, this is their
reality, and it must be understood and endured.
College is a time of significant growth and change, as individuals navigate new
experiences, relationships, and responsibilities. In delving through our research study,
the insights I have collected from the results that have emerged are as follows: (1) in a
long-term romantic relationship, both partners may undergo individual changes and
face new challenges and this can impact the dynamics of the relationship, (2) a long-
term romantic relationship can provide support, companionship, and motivation
among others during difficult times to navigate the ups and downs of college life
while nurturing the relationship, and (3) college life is often a time when individuals
gain greater independence and autonomy, including making decisions about their
education and future plans which is why in a long-term romantic relationship,

93
respecting each other’s individuality and allowing space for personal growth and
exploration can positively affect the relationship in the long run. As a researcher, I am
aware of the potential influence of my own background, beliefs, and experiences on
the research themes identified in this study. By acknowledging our own subjectivity
as individuals of bearing, the research members and I aim to enhance the validity and
integrity of this study on long-term romantic relationships.
Oandasan, Angela E.
As a college student, seeing that a lot of people nowadays try to venture for love and
try to make their relationship last long at a time where one’s academics are at its most
stressful levels, finding out on how to maintain long-term romantic relationships is in
fact, that relevant. As we continued with the study, I too became curious about many
things and thus had some observations. Finding some participants for this study really
took some time because what we needed were those who are in a relationship that is 3
years and above already, which made it hard because of the ones in a relationship today
had only started dating for days, months, year/s but only 1 or 2 not 3 and above. So, we
had a rough start as per trying to start our data gathering early. Through the study I
learned a lot and had some growth as a researcher who is just an undergraduate and has
more things to learn especially with the data gathering procedure that one really must
be patient and cannot rush the process.

94
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Appendices
Appendix A
Permit to Conduct Research

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Appendix B
Letter of Permission to Conduct the Study

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Appendix C
Sample Accomplished Informed Consent

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Appendix D
Letter for Review of Research Instrument

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Appendix E
Certificate of Approval of Research Instruments

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Appendix F
Sample Personal Data Sheet

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Appendix G
Certification of Pilot Study

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Appendix H
Interview Guide
Statement of the problem 1: What are the experiences of the heterosexual college
students in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship?
1. How would you describe your experiences in maintaining a long-term
romantic relationship?
2. Can you tell us about your happiest moments in the relationship?
3. What are your sad moments in the relationship?
Statement of the problem 2: What are the challenges faced by the participants in
staying in a long-term romantic relationship?
1. Can you explain the challenges or problems that you encounter/encountered in
maintaining a relationship with your boyfriend/girlfriend?
2. In what ways do these challenges affect you?
3. How do you manage the challenges in your romantic relationship?
Statement of the problem 3: What benefits do college students get by being in a
long-term romantic relationship?
1. What are the reasons that contribute to you staying in your relationship?
2. Can you provide benefits that you get from your partner?
3. How do these benefits affect you?

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Appendix I
Transcribed data
Participant 1
Duration: 18 min, 19 sec.
Line Key Content
No. Person
1 Good morning. Our research is about “Experiences of The Selected College
2 Students In Metro Manila In Maintaining Long-Term Romantic Relationships.”
3 So, we invited you today because..uhm, fitted ka as our participant.
4 Ayun dito sa inform consent form namin sinasabi lang naman dito na yung data
5 I mo gagamitin namin siya for our research and you have the rights to withdraw
6 anytime, and you can always contact us.
7 Nandito lang naman siya. So, let’s start. So, let’s talk about your experiences in a
8 romantic relationship - in a long-term romantic relationship. So, how would you
9 describe your experiences in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship?
10 P1 Uhm, paanong experiences ba, how would you describe it?
11 I Parang in general, yung mga naranasan mo lang, ganyan.
12 Ah ok. Of course may ano, high and lows.. sa relationships So, ano siya, mixed
13 emotions. Minsan happy ka, minsan nakakapagod rin makipag relationship
14 ganyan. Minsan stress reliever mo, minsan siya naman yung dahilan ng stress,
15 P1 ganun. Pero, all in all, siguro… uhm.. hindi naman kami magtatagal kung hindi
16 kami like, masaya, ganun. So, kahit may mga negative, I can say na.. [clears
17 throat], mas lamang yung like.. highs namin like, mas lamang yung happy
18 moments namin ganiyan. So, ayun lang.
19 I Uhm, yung experiences mo usually yung mga struggle in the relationship ganun?
20 P1 Oo, ganyan siya.
21 Sige, since napagusapan na’tin yung parang general gist ng relationship ninyo as
22 I a long-term romantic relationship, let’s move on naman. Can you tell us about
23 your happiest moments in the relationship?
24 Uhm.. Siguro ano, like, uhm, masaya na meron kaming milestones na parang,
25 magka.. magkasama kami sa mga milestones namin. For example, like, academic
26 ano ko, milestones ganyan. Tapos siya naman nag b-business ganyan, may
27 business, may small business kasi siya, ganun. So, ‘yun, tapos happiest moments
28 rin siguro yung pag.. uhm.. pag mag ce-celebrate kami ng Anniversary ganyan.
29 Kasi, before, nag start kasi kami ano parang bata pa ganiyan. 16 ako, tapos,
30 parang 17 siya ganyan.
31 So, parang, before, ano kami, parang lagi kaming pagod ganiyan. Mag co-
32 P1 commute kami, tapos parang lagi kami nagkikita ganyan. tapos, parang lagi kami
33 pagod. Magcocommute kami.. nag kikita ganiyan.
34 Kasi ano eh.. parang ‘yun yung love language ko, like, quality time ganyan, kaya
35 minemaintain talaga namin ‘yun all throughout.
36 So, before ganun, nakakapagod. Tapos, parang ngayon, kahit.. uhm.. like, kahit
37 simpleng aya lang, madali na kasi nagkakotse siya ganyan.
38 Kaya parang, upon looking back, malayo kami ngayon ganun.
115
‘Yun lang.
39 Bale, yung happiest moments ninyo kasi diba nag start kayo early ganiyan, edi
40 I ngayon yung mga happiest moments ninyo yung mga na achieve ninyo
41 personally.
42 Ayan, sige. Sige let’s move on.
What are your sad moments naman in the relationship?
43 Siguro sad kasi.. parang ang broad ng sad so, pag sad siguro ano, pag may
44 misunderstanding kami ganyan kasi mag.. ano kami eh, parang opposite attitude
45 kami. Iba yung kinalakihan naming, ganun. Like, siya ano, yung family niya
46 parang ideal family ganyan. Parang, kada linggo simba. After mag simba, kakain,
47 ganun sila, while iba naman yung kinalakihan ko. So, yung parang, minsan nag c-
48 clash yung attitude namin, like ano, “Mali ‘yan”, tapos sa pananaw ko like,
49 P1 normal lang naman ganyan. So, ayun, minsan nagkakamisunderstanding kami.
50 Tapos, meron kasi siyang ugali na parang, nang s-shutdown, ganiyan, na parang -
51 parang kailangan niya munang kumalma ganiyan, pag nag aaway.
52 While ako, gusto ko naman, sinasabi ko kaagad kasi hindi ako parang hindi ko
53 kayang.. anong tawag doon.. kimkimin, parang ganun, and ayaw kong
54 pinapatagal.
55 So, ayun, parang sad moments siya tsaka ano rin, pag may pinapagdaanan kami
56 like, yung medical issues ganyan.
57 Yung family niya kasi parang, maraming like, issues within ano, health care din
58 kasi parang may sakit yung mama niya ganya.
59 So, ayun, parang palapit rin ako sa kanila. Parang, isang family nalang din kami
60 kasi minsan sa kanila ako tumutuloy ganyan pag walang tao sa amin, ganiyan.
61 Eh ‘di ayun. Ayun yung mga I can say sad.
62 Sige, ayun. Sige, since napagusapan naman na na’tin yung mga experiences mo,
63 I let’s move on naman sa mga challenges na kinaharap ninyo ng partner mo. First,
64 can you explain the challenges or problems that you encounter/encountered in
65 maintaining a relationship with your boyfriend?
66 P1 Uhmm paanong problems? Specific ganiyan?
67 I Oo, parang yung mga- parang mga specific napagdaanan ninyo, or yung mga-
68 kahit hindi yung super laking mga problems ganun.
69 Uhmm I can say na challenge talaga, ayun nga yung gaya ng sinabi ko kanina
70 yung pagkakasakit ng mama niya kasi parang.. ano.. nitong pandemic lang ‘yun
71 eh. Parang twice parang tinakbo sa ER ganyan tapos parang sobrang gulo rin ng-
72 syempre nagkakagulo yung family niya ganun. Then parang nag reflect sa kanya
72 parang naging gulo rin- nagugulo rin yung utak niya ganyan. So, parang syempre
73 kung ganun yung partner mo parang kumbaga parang foundation ng relationship
74 niyo yung isa, uhmm parang broke(n) ganiyan so parang mag rereflect talaga sa
75 relationship parang hihina yung foundation relationship ganyan. Tapos, minsan
76 naman ayun nga, since opposite kami ng attitude.. Uhmm, hindi rin kami same ng
77 parang love language, kaya minsan kapag may misunderstanding kami may mga
78 napapaoverthink ako ganiyan. I feel neglected ganiyan, I feel insecure. Uhmm,
79 tapos ayun, kasi nga ‘di ba, mas gusto niyang kumalma muna kapag nag aaway.
80 P1 So, ang dating sa akin nun ay, he can’t give me like the peace- the peace of mind
81 that I want so ayun parang - so, akin lang naman ‘yun… Pero siguro sa kanya iba
116
82 yung like, pagkakaintindi niya gusto niya ng space ganyan. So, ayun pag matagal
83 na talaga kayo may mga phase na parang “Mahal ko pa ba ‘to?” ganyan. Parang
84 feeling mo ma f-fell out of love ka na ganiyan. Pero, parang phase lang naman
85 ‘yun kasi syempre pag nag boyfriend ka uhmm, siguro committed- kung ikaw
86 committed siguro yung ano mo pananaw mo kasi iba-iba naman ‘yan eh kasi ako
87 pag nagboyfriend, committed ako. So, ayun parang minsan..
88 uhm dahil doon, I feel ano, taken for granted ganiyan pero, ewan ko. Baka ako
89 lang. Baka ako lang ganiyan, kasi siya parang ok naman, happy go lucky ganyan.
90 Pero, ayun kasi yung like nag rereflect sa akin na ugali niya, ganun.
91 Ayun-ayun yung mga challenges [laugh].
92 I Ayun yung mga challenges naexplain mo
93 In what ways did this challenges affect you?
94 Uhmm siguro pag may current- kunyare-kunyare lang currently nasa challenge
95 kami ngayon siguro I try to reflect kasi nga minsan ano like, ganun nga yung mga
96 nararamdaman ko which is minsan pag nag- pinaguusapan naming, iba naman
97 pala yung gusto niyang- kumbaga gusto niyang iparamdam sa’kin ganyan kaya
98 parang ayun.. I use the time to reflect ganyan pero minsan pag sobrang lala ano
99 uhm, hindi mo talaga maiiwasan magiging anxious-maging anxious ganyan tsaka
100 P1 ‘yun nga minsan pag hindi niya paguusapan feeling ko uhmm, I feel insecure
101 ganiyan kasi, “Ano pa bang gagawin ko?”, ganiyan.
102 “Para pansinin mo’ko.” yung parang ganun eh siya ayaw nga niya ng ganun. So,
103 like ayun parang naiinsecure ako na- kasi pagka nag aaway kami, ang takbuhan
104 niya, mga friends niya ganyan mag ‘di-hang sila ganyan, lalaro sila. ‘Di ayun,
105 parang mabuti pa sila ganiyan pag galit ka ano napaguusapan niyo- ang
106 nakakausap mo. ganiyan. So ayun, I feel minsan insecure pero ‘yun, most of the
107 time naman nag re-reflect lang ako like “mali ba talaga ako?” ganyan, ganun.
108 I Kapag naiinsecure ka mostly ang ginagawa mo ay nag re-reflect ka lang?
109 Oo, iniisip ko kasi.. nga ayun sabi ko kanina parang may pagka overthinker ako
110 P1 [laugh], ganun so parang nag- nag re-reflect ako na syempre different nga kami
111 ng attitude so iniintindi ko in his shoes ganun, (ok, sige.) parang ganun.
112 I Let’s move on naman.
113 How do you manage the challenges in your romantic relationship?
114 Uhmm manage, ayun nga kanina uhmm dapat nag co-communicate talaga kasi
115 ganun yung nag ‘di-work sa’kin, yung parang as a person uhmm dapat talaga- I
116 feel like na dapat pinag uusapan talaga, kaagad!
117 Ayun naman yung akin, tapos yung ‘kaniya naman kahit-kahit pag ano na
118 P1 kumalma na ganiyan kasi syempre pag bugso ng damdamin kung anu-ano talaga
119 ang nasasabi ganyan. Tsaka, ayun nga dapat uhmm ay- I mean, committed talaga
120 kami. I can say naman na committed talaga kami sa isa’t-isa kaya ayun uhmm
121 whenever uhmm the challenges- the challenges happen.. Uhmm pinag uusapan
122 nalang namin talaga tsaka uhmm we apologize, of course, sa isa’t-isa.
123 I What are the reasons that contribute to you staying in your relationship?
124 Uhmm reasons… uhmm ano actually, kasi kumuha kami ng nag- may nag bigay
125 sa’min ng aso (Mhmm.) so parang anak namin yung aso- so kung sabihin mo na
126 reason, siguro isang reason na (Mhmm.) isang reason na yung aso na ‘yon. Like,
127 parang may- kung parang may uhmm reason ka kasi syempre hindi mo naman
117
128 pwedeng iabandona yung dog like (Mhmm.) iiwan sakaniya ganiyan. Tsaka like
129 uhmm parang practical na rin like uhmm ang dami mo nang binigay sa
130 relationship. Alam mo ‘yon? Ang dami mo nang sinacrifice, ang dami mo nang
131 binigay. So, parang kung iisipin mo “Ay, parang nakakapanghinayang naman
132 pag iniwan ko pa ‘to.” ganyan. So ayon, parang isang reason din yung parang
133 marami ka nang binigay kaya nag s-stay ka sa relationship ganiyan. Pero- tsaka
134 ang dami na rin naming, like, experiences ganyan kasi minsan parang mindset ko
135 P1 na uhmm sa relationship normal lang naman yung mag aaway kayo ganiyan tas
136 pag iniwan mo humanap ka ng bago ganun din naman yung pagdadaanan niyo,
137 parang ganun. So, mag stay ka na like, mag stay ka na kung hindi naman like
138 sobrang toxic niyo ganun kasi masaya naman kami ganiyan. (Sige.)
139 Edi ayun, wait lang. Uhmm, ano pa ba? Tas minsan kunyari, pag nag aaway kami
140 ganyan parang I tend to give the benefit of the doubt doon sa person like “Ah,
141 baka mabago pa niya.” Yung parang ganun like na parang “Ah baka ngayon lang
142 ‘to.” “Baka phase lang ‘to”, “Baka eventually maging okay na rin.”
143 So ‘yon, for being honest ganun talaga yung reason kung bakit ako nag s-stay sa
144 ganun na relationship. Pero, in conclusion, syempre mahal ko rin naman yung tao
145 kaya ako nags-stay.
146 I Sige, can you provide the benefits that you get from your partner? In general
147 diyan tsaka ehh as a college student.
148 In general muna, of course benefit meron kang emotional support system ganiyan
149 Maybe uhmm in general or sa buhay or education ganiyan, kasi ngayon, as of
150 now, mas napapadali niya talaga yung buhay ko.
151 Lik,e for example, may kailangan- naalala ko noon noong last sem may kailangan
152 kaming mga participant ganiyan fit siya sa criteria, so parang ang-ang bilis- ang
153 dali lang ganyan tapos ngayon uhmm late yung uwi ko sa-sa OD late yung uwian
154 P1 ganian may tagasundo ako para hindi na ako mahirapan mag commute ganyan.
155 Mas napapadali talaga niya yung buhay ko. Tapos uhm.. pero all in all syempre
156 yung benefit na ‘yun in general like syempre masarap sa feeling ‘pag alam mong
157 may nagmamahal sa’yo ganiyan, may nag aantay sa’yo. So ayun siguro yung
158 benefit like- tapos minsan pag in school, pag nahihirapan ako sa quiz magpapa
159 review lang ako sa kanya ganiyan. So ayun, maganda talaga siya I mean as a
160 support system tsaka sa education na rin.
161 I Bale uhmm yung boyfriend mo ba ano, in college pa ba siya?
162 P1 Oo, nag aaral din sya.
163 I Ah, so nagtutulungan kayo in terms of academics?
164 Mhmm ayun! Ayun, siya din- mahina kasi siya sa ano sa english. Tagalog kasi-
165 parang mas maano siya sa tagalog.
166 So, parang nahihirapan siya minsan minsan mag ano ng sentences ganiyan-
167 P1 minsan may debate sakanila kailangan kong itranslate in english para-para ay- in
168 taga- yung English na question ittranslate ko in Filipino para maunderstand better
169 niya, ganun. Parang isang sabi ko lang rin na kailangan ko ng tulong tutulungan
170 niya ako well vice versa ganun.
171 I Sige, yung napagusapan na natin yung mga benefits na nakukuha mo tsaka siya.
172 How do these benefits affect you?
173 P1 Paanong affect you?
118
174 I Parang.. ano bang nangyayari sa’yo pag nakukuha mo yung mga benefits na ‘to
175 Like.. uh, it affects me positively. Syempre, like ‘pag alam niyang may problema
176 sa school, hindi naman siya dumadagdag na ano.. so I think it affects me
177 positively. It teaches me a lot din. Syempre as a Psychology student din, parang..
178 Ah ganyan pala yung nararamdaman ng ibang tao ganyan, parang hindi pala lahat
179 P1 umiikot sa mundo ko, ganyan. Parang.. uhm.. Nakaka ano rin siya.. parang
180 nakaka open ng eyes [laugh], parang- parang ganun. Tapos like.. patience,
181 ganyan. Understanding. Parang ganun.. Ganyan, parang ayun yung mga benefits-
182 ay parang ganun nakakaaffect yung benefits. Mas nagiging stable ako as a person.
Participant 2
Line Key Content
No. Person
1 Good afternoon, our study is about “Experiences of Selected College
2 Students in Metro Manila in Maintaining Long-term Romantic
3 Relationships.” So given na pinili po namin kayo, you fit the criteria for
4 being our participant. In our ICF po, nandito naman na lahat; nabasa niyo
5 naman po siya. Nandito din po yung contact number namin, and you can
6 I always contact us to withdraw kapag gusto niyo po, tapos contact niyo lang
7 po kami kapag may questions kayo, or kung niyo magwithdraw from our
8 study. Tapos, yung dito po.. uhm.. sa incentives, ibibigay na lang po namin
9 siya sa inyo. Tapos yung data ng research findings namin kung gusto niyong
10 malaman pwede niyo rin po syang itanong sa amin.
11 Ayun lang po. Start na po tayo sa question. Let’s talk about your experiences
12 in being in a long-term romantic relationship. How would you describe your
13 experiences in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship?
14 Uh.. Like yung mga sinasabi.. Parang similar lang din sa mga sinasabi ng iba
15 like, sa una ayon honeymoon stage. Puro fun kasi nandoon pa lang yung-
16 pero hindi namin siya masyadong napagdaanan yung honeymoon stage kasi
17 ‘di ba? Usually parang ‘yun yung get to know each other. Hindi namin siya
18 masyadong napagdaanan kasi, like, matagal muna kami- ay- friends muna
19 kami bago mag enter sa relationship. So parang rekta na agad. Like.. Ah-
20 hindi kami masaya lang sa una, parang na-m-maintain siya all throughout.
21 Hindi ako naniniwala doon sa sinasabi nila na sa una lang masaya kasi for us
22 kahit 3 years na kami, parang nandoon pa rin yung sparks. Sinasabi nila
23 nawawala na yung sparks, pero sa amin, parang mas nagiging deep pa yung
24 relationship namin, parang mas nagiging.. anong tawag dito? Mas nagiging
25 may spark pa siya, mas nagiging sweet kasi parang as we face yung mga
26 challenges namin sa relationship and habang naaayos namin ‘yun, habang
27 mine-maintain namin yung relationship namin, parang mas may natututunan
28 P2 pa kami sa isa’t-isa. Kasi doon sa honeymoon stage ang.. parang ang.. parnag
29 ang si.. natututunan niyo lang sa isa’t-isa yung mga favorites ganyan ganyan,
30 pero sa amin since alam na namin ‘yun since friends kami, ang natututunan
31 naming sa isa’t-isa is how we solve each other’s… ano.. ay. Yung mga
119
32 flaws- pero solve each other’s ano.. parang nagiging problems.

33 Kung may problem siya, may problem ako, parang hinehelp namin yung
34 isa’t-isa imanage yung problems na ‘yun. So yung describe your experience
35 in maintaining a long-tern relationship, uh.. hindi ko sya.. siya masaya sa
36 umpisa, pero masaya siya all throughout. Syempre may ups and downs and
37 common naman ‘yun ‘di naman ‘yun mawawala sa relationship. Pero so far,
38 so good naman siya kasi nga maganda yung foundation namin. Naging
39 friends kami sa umpisa kaya hindi ganon kahirap or hindi ganon ka-
40 challenging yung pag m-maintain namin sa long term relationship namin kasi
may good foundation kami.
41 So bale kanina namention mo yung sparks, yung sweetness. Uhm, meron
42 I bang.. pwede ka ba mag share ng mga scenarios ng mga nangyayari sa inyo
43 kung pano siya nangyayari?
44 Actually ano eh.. Parang laging may happy moments, laging may moment na
45 ma-f-feel namin na nandiyan yung spark kasi ano kami.. Uh.. noong umpisa
46 ng relationship naming, LDR kasi nagpandemic. So noong mga time na ‘yun
47 walang masyado since ang hirap ishow ng mga happy moments, or mga
48 moments na may spark kasi parang mas napapakita namin siya in person.
49 And then noong nag face to face na, parang doon mas marami yung happy
50 moments namin, pero meron pa rin sa umpisa. Pero mas doon lang nabuild
51 up yung mga moments naming may spark, like yung masasaya, kasi nag live
52 in kami together. So parang “Ah, ganun pala siya pag magkasama kami sa
53 bahay.” so parang the more na na d-discover namin yung isa't-isa while
54 P2 living together.. Parang ayon ang saya. Ang saya na.. parang masasabi ko na
55 pinakahappiest moment ko ngayon is yung parang pag gising namin sa
56 umaga, isa't-isa agad yung makikita namin, parang ganon. So.. yung.. ang
57 saya kasi sa feeling na pagkaagising mo.. Ang cheesy [laugh], makikita mo
58 agad yung person na mahal mo ganyan. Tapos sabay din kayo matutulog, so
59 pagtulog mo nandiyan siya tapos pagising mo nandiyan siya.
60 So ‘yun talaga yung pinaka.. uhm na t-treasure kong moments ngayon sa
relationship namin.
61 So we talked about your experiences and nasabi mo naman na ayun yung
62 I pinakamasaya mong moment with your partner. Aside from that meron pa
63 bang.. happy moments?
64 Ano.. pag nag g-go on dates kami. Like, pinakamemorable na date namin is
65 yung nag sponty na nag intra kami. Like ‘yun yung kaka-start pa lang ng
66 relationship namin pre-pandemic. So parang.. ‘yun kasi yung unang “I love
67 P2 you” ganyan. Unang I love you. Yung unang parang nasabi namin na, "Ah
68 totoo na." ganyan. So parang.. yung date na ‘yun back before mag pandemic,
69 parang doon ko naramdaman yung parang kuryente sa katawan mo na.. ah
70 shit nakakakilig ‘yun. Ayun yung unang kilig, ‘yun yung tumatak sa isip ko
71 aside from yung.. uh.. happy moments namin ngayon.
72 Since we talked about your happiest moments. Lets talk about naman, what
73 I are your sad moments in the relationship?
74 Uhm of course yung kapag nag aaway. Pero yung mga away kasi naman
76 hindi siya about sa ibang tao ganyan ganyan. Yung away namin usually
120
76 about sa sarili namin, like yung.. Ako kasi parang feel ko hindi ako
77 emotionally stable ganyan ganyan. So parang pag kunyari sad ako or
78 something, napo-project ko sa kanya, so nag c-create ng misunderstandings.
79 P2 ‘yun.. ayon pag tinotopak ako, mga ganun. So doon laging nag aaway, yung
80 mga flaws namin sa sarili namin parang.. ‘yun.. doon nag s-start yung mga
81 sad moments kasi parang iniisip ba namin kung hindi namin kaya alagaan
82 yung sarili namin, parang.. kaya ba namin i-maintain yung relationship or
83 kaya ba naming, like, maalagaan yung isa't isa. Parang yung doubtful
84 moments na ‘yun, ‘yun yung pinakasad moment sa relationship namin.
85 I Since namention mo ‘yun, meron pa bang mga sad moments?
86 Uhm.. Ano siguro, since.. ayun nga, ngayon live in kami. Syempre may
87 times na.. Live in kami kasi same kami ng dorm, ganyan ganyan. Syempre
88 uuwi pa rin kami sa kanya-kanya naming bahay. So ‘yun, mga sad moments
89 na ‘yun, pag aalis siya. Kasi siya lagi nauunang umaalis eh. ‘Pag aalis siya,
90 P2 parang ayaw ko nang umalis. Ayaw ko siyang umalis ganun, kasi gusto kong
91 mag stay.. Very clingy kasi ako so, pag aalis siya isa yon sa saddest moments
92 ko kasi gusto ko lagi siyang kasama, ganyan ganyan.
93 Parang nasanay na ko na nandoon siya lagi tas biglang weekend wala siya so
94 ganyan ganyan. So ganun lang mga sad moments namin. Wala kaming sad
95 moments na may cheating. May ano may ibang.. may sinungalingan, ganun.
96 Puro about ourselves, saka kapag aalis siya.
97 Let's move on naman na,
98 Let's talk about the challenges na kinakaharap niyo in being a long-term
99 I romantic relationship. Can you explain the challenges or the problems you
100 encounter in maintaining a relationship with your boyfriend?
101 Ayun nga. Medyo nahirapan kami sa part na.. ng pagmaintain ng relationship
102 dahil sa mga problema sa mga sarili naming. Like, feel ko emotionally
103 unstable ako and siya rin naman merong siyang own struggles. So parang
104 dahil doon, sometimes nakakalimutan namin imaintain yung relationship
105 namin sa sobrang overwhelmed or sa sobrang naka.. naka delved kami sa
106 mga sarili naming problema. Parang.. parang nakakalimutan naman naming
107 na, "Uy date naman tayo." Kasi syempre sobrang sad mo na may sarili kang
108 problema or nalulungkot ka on your own tapos.. uhmh.. nakakalimutan mo
109 na ah shit kailangan mo pa pala alagaan ‘to si ano.. Yung boyfriend ko
110 ganyan. Kailangan ko pa pala siya alagaan, kailangan ko pa ipakita sakanya
111 P2 na I care. Kasi ayun nga, yung challenge is sometimes parang nakakalimutan
112 namin ipakita sa isa't-isa na mahal pa rin namin yung isa't-isa, kasi
113 namomroblema kami sa mga sarili namin. So yung mga individual problems
114 naming, yung pagiging emotionally unstable, nakakaapekto siya sa pag
115 maintain namin sa relationship naming. ‘yun lang talaga yung
116 pinakachallenge. Yung.. ‘pag lalo na pag sabay kami nagkakaron ng topak.
117 Like parehas kami na-f-feel na sad kami. Tapos pag sabay ‘yun, parang
118 syempre sabihin ko na icomfort mo naman ako, ganyan ganyan.
119 Pero siya, sad din syempre feel ko. “Icomfort mo na ako.” Ganyan ganyan.
120 So mga ganoong bagay yung mga nagiging challenge sa relationship namin
121 yung individual struggles namin. Yung makakafeel namin.. yung mapapafeel
121
122 namin sa isa't-isa na kailangan namin ng care, pero ang hirap idemand kasi
123 may pinagdadaanan yung partner mo. Ganun.
124 I Yung mga challenges na ‘to in what ways does it affect you?
125 Actually yung mga challenges na namention ko yung nga, yung individual
126 struggles. Yung want mo ng care pero hindi mo mademand kasi may
127 problema yung partner mo. Parang almost dahil.. almost doon yung reason
128 kung bakit kami nag break hindi dahil sa ibang tao, hindi dahil sa kung anu-
129 ano pang common problems ng mga couples ngayon. Ah.. ‘yun nga, yung
130 kami almost nang muntik maghiwalay lagi like parang gusto na namin
131 tapusin kasi nga hindi namin maayos yung mga sarili namin paano pa namin
132 i-m-maintain ‘to? So sobrang naapektuhan ako doon. Like.. pag nangyayari
133 ‘yun, like ‘pag nagsasabay kami ng topak, tapos gusto namin ng comfort sa
134 isa't-isa pero hindi mabigay.. Parang.. Hindi ako.. alam mo ‘yun, gusto ko na
135 lang magstay sa kwarto and ang hirap pa. Mas mahirap na ayun na.. Sorry.
136 P2 Naapektuhan kami sobrang hirap kasi. Ang hirap mag away pag nandoon
137 kayo sa isang space kasi live in nga kami. So ang hirap mag-away so imbis
138 na magkaroon kami ng alone time para mag breathe, para mag.. Alam mo
139 ‘yun, huminga, para mag catch up sa mga bagay-bagay, nahihirapan kami
140 kasi lalo lang sumasabog kasi nasa isang space lang kami. So ayun, sobrang
141 apektado ako doon na parang nandoon lang kami sa kwarto nakaupo tapos
142 hindi nag-uusap or tinatry ng isa makipagusap, pero ayaw.Mga ganung
143 bagay ako naapektuhan kasi nag c-clash nang sobra [laugh]. ‘Pag naglilive in
144 kami kasi wala kaming ibang mapuntahan.
145 I So pag ganun po yung mga instances ano yung nararamdaman niyo?
146 Ayon sobrang nasasad ako. Hindi.. like. Ang hobby ko kasi pag nalulungkot
147 ako is hindi ako kumakain, hindi ako kumikilos. Like nakahiga lang ako
148 buong araw sa kama. So ganun yung ginagawa ko like, iyak lang ako nang
149 P2 iyak. Ayon nga sabi niya nga kanina, sobrang iyakin ko daw which is true.
150 Like ‘pag konting.. ‘Pag alam kong may mangyayaring away iiyak na agad
151 ako. Hindi ko alam kung bakit pero ayun. ‘yun yung way ko.
152 Since.. uhm.. you experience challenges, how do you manage the challenges
153 I in your romatic relationship?
154 Yung mga first years sobrang hirap talaga imanage yung mga challenges na
155 ‘yun kasi ayon nga nagpandemic, ang hirap imanage nang hindi kayo
156 magkasama like kunyari mag-aaway kami nung pandemic syempre yung
157 way namin is video call lang. So paano maayos? Ang dali-dali mag offline.
158 So ngayon mas namamanage namin siya kasi mas nakakapagusap kami since
159 close enclosed nga kami sa iisang space ngayon. So ano lang, ‘pag kalmado
160 P2 na lahat.. pag hindi na alam mo yon, wala ka na sa verge ng emotions pag
161 kalmado na doon kami mag uusap kung ano mali ko, kung ano mali niya.
162 Kung pano namin masosolve together parang yung point namin is.. hindi
163 namin kaaway yung isa't isa, kaaway namin yung problems which is yung
164 problems ng isa't-isa. So yung nilalabanan namin is yung problems mismo
165 namin. Sobrang important talaga yung communication. Para sa akin, ‘yun
166 lang yung way namin kung paano namin namamanage.
122
167 Sige. Let's talk about naman.. yung benefits mo as a student in being a long-
168 I term romantic relationship. What are the reasons that contributes to you in
169 staying in your relationship?
170 Aside from love, which is syempre mahal namin yung isa't-isa kaya kami nag
171 s-stay. Aware naman ako na hindi lang enough na dapat mahal mo yung
172 partner mo, pano kung sobrang toxic na ganyan ganyan. Pero sa amin kasi
173 yung reason kung bakit ako nag stay kasi sobrang comforting kapag
174 nandiyan siya parang pag kunyari nag break kami, mag s-start na naman all
175 over again. Parang nakakasawa papakilala na naman. Kaya ako nag s-stay
176 kasi una pa lang, maganda na yung foundation namin tapos nakikita ko all
177 throughout the relationship kahit sobrang daming challenges dahil feeling
178 P2 namin emotionally unstable kami. Na o-overcome namin yon and nakikita ko
179 na tinatry ng bawat isa na isolve yung problem, and hindi lang isa yung may
180 gusto. Hindi lang isa yung lumalaban. So parang nag contribute siya kasi..
181 parehas namin gusto eh. Kapag hindi niyo parehas gusto parang wala ng
182 point na mag stay doon sa relationship. And the fact na ang reason to stay in
183 a relationship, kasi pag nag break kami magkasama kami sa lahat ng
184 groupings sa lahat ng klase so pag nag break kami, ang awkward na ganon so
185 isa rin yon sa reason kung bakit ako nag s-stay.
186 I Can you provide benefits that you get from your partner?
187 Uhm.. benefits. Ayun parang lagi kaming nagtutulungan kasi kaklase ko siya
188 sa lahat so benefit na classmate ko siya. Benefit sa.. na parehas gumagana
189 utak namin sa mga school works, kapag may FA. Parehas namin nasasagutan
190 kasi parang.. Anong tawag ‘doon? Ano tawag ‘doon.. productive kami
191 together! So yung benefits is productive kami together. Mas kampante ako
192 na gumagawa kami pag magkasama. Actually narealize ko lang very ano
193 kami co-dependent ganyan [laugh]. Tapos ano kunwari, acts of service.
193 Ayan, mahilig siya mag acts of service. Kunwari, ayaw ko kasi naglilinis ng
195 CR doon sa place namin so siya yung gumagawa, so benefit ‘yun. Benefit
196 P2 din na ‘pag sa gabi may kasama ka ‘pag bibili ka sa kanto may kasama ka.
197 Yung companionship ayun benefit din ‘yun. And syempre [laugh], sinabi
198 niya nga yung sexlife benefit daw yon kasi before maging kami. Like
199 syempre pag gusto mo isatisfy needs mo like wala. Ganyan puro FuBu lang,
200 so ngayon katabi mo na agad. And ano pa ba.. ano pa bang benefits uhm
201 magkasama kami together, sa sexlife, sa acads. Yung friendship like yung
202 friendship namin. Worth keeping so beneficial siya, ayun.
203 I So kahit magboyfriend kayo, you still consider each other as friends pa rin?
204 Oo minsan nga nakakalimutan namin na magjowa kami kasi nagstart kami as
205 P2 friends. Doon kami sanay, and sinasabi ko sa kanya na, “Girlfriend mo ‘ko!”
206 ganyan ganyan [laugh] Inaasar niya kasi ako! Parang ganun.
207 I So with these benefits, how does it affect you?
208 Mas natutulungan niya ko sa.. Kasi sometimes na f-feel ko nagstrustruggle
209 ako emotionally. So parang ‘pag nakikita ko yung mga ginagawa niya for me
210 parang mas ginaganahan ako mag like bumangon everyday. Ginaganahan
211 ako bumangon like, ‘pag tinatamad ako. Or parang.. anong tawag doon..
212 P2 Parang pulling force ko siya parang ganun. Minomotivate niya ko in a way
123
213 and of course nagiging happy ako kasi tinutulungan niya ko sa.. household
214 chores kahit kailangan ko pa siyang sabihan [laugh].
215 Minsan kasi nag c-cellphone lang habang nagwawalis ako sabi ko, “’Wag ka
216 naman mag cellphone. Kahit wag mo ‘kong tulungan basta wag ka na mag
217 cellphone." ganun [laugh]
218 Pero yung benefits yon nga tinutulungan niya ako. Ay- effect nga pala.
219 Ayun masaya nga ako and nagiging motivation ko siya. sa day by day ganun.
220 So that’s the end of our interview. Debrief ka lang po namin na this is what
221 I research is about. ‘Gaya ng sabi ko kanina, kung may question ka, you can
222 always contact us. Thank you!
Participant 3
Line No. Key Content
Person
1 So bali po ito yung Informed Consent Form namin, nabasa niyo naman po
2 siya. Tapos nandito na rin po kung paano namin i-s-store at ide-delete yung
3 data po ninyo. So, our study is about “Experiences Of Selected College
4 Students In Metro Manila In Maintaining Long-Term Romantic
5 I Relationships”. And ikaw po as our participant, syempre you fit yung mga
6 kailangan po namin and yung critieria kaya namin kayo kinuha. Let’s start
7 with the interview. Sige. Let’s talk about your experiences in being in a
8 heterosexual long-term romantic relationship, so how would you describe
9 your experiences in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship?
10 Actually hindi ko alam kung paano ko siya i-e-explain kasi first ko. Pero so
11 far naman, since 4 years na, parang napansin ko na, base sa relationship
12 P3 namin is parang chill lang. Since wala pa naman kasi kaming gaano talagang
13 mga kahit anong ganap. Tsaka siguro yung experience, parang maganda lang
14 din kasi yung nabuild na relationship between, sa both families, so ‘yun
lang.
15 I ‘Yun lang yung experiences niyo so far given na.. 4 years na po kayo, baka
16 po may mga iba pa kayong experiences na pinagdaanan together, ganyan po?
17 Uhm, di ko lang alam kung masasagot ko yung ibang tanong kasi—pero
18 ‘yun, so far parang mas naging—nung una parang medyo ano pa kami, hindi
19 pa masyadong open sa isa’t isa. Nangangapa pareho kasi parehong kaming
20 P3 first sa isa’t-isa. Tapos parang in the long run din, naging close kami sa
21 family niya, family ko, ganon. Since magkapitbahay lang din, ‘pag kunwari
22 may kailangan ako, may kailangan siya, mabilis lang din.
23 I Ah, sige po. Bali ano po talaga kayo.. or close na po talaga kayo nung...
24 P3 Actually, magkakilala na kami since... grade 1.
25 I Ah, wow.
26 P3 [Laugh]. Oo.
27 I Sige. So, let's talk about your happiest moments in the relationship. Can you
28 provide us po yung mga masaya niyong experiences with each other ganyan.
124
29 Siguro yung happiest kapag kunwari, uhm—hindi ko alam kung ‘yun yung
30 pinakahappiest, siguro yung kapag nakikihalubilo siya kasama family ko. Or
31 P3 happiest din kapag yung nasespend kami ng time na kami lang, kunwari out
32 of nowhere biglang magkakayayaan: “Tara dito, tara doon.” Yung mga
33 ganung bagay ba. Yung mga out-of-the-blue lang bigla nalang mang-aaya.
34 Tapos kahit walang gagawin, okay lang kami kahit kami lang, magkasama
35 lang kami, yung each other’s company, yung presence, yung ganun.
36 I Bali bukod doon, meron pa bang ibang happiest moments, kayo?
37 Happiest moments? Siguro yung pag ano, nagdedate ng biglaan. Kasi lalo na
38 ngayong college ang hirap na.. mag ano ng time. Lalo siya, parang ang dami
39 P3 niya ng responsibilities, hindi lang sa school pati din sa bahay nila. Kaya
40 ako, siguro nacoconsider ko ring happiest talaga kapag yung, kapag pwede
41 siyang makipag.. ano. Spend time kasama ako, yung mga quality time, ayun
42 talaga yung happiest sa akin.
43 So, since napag-usapan natin yung happiest moments ninyo in the
44 I relationship, let’s talk about your sad moments naman.
45 So, meron po ba kayong mga encounters na that made you sad, or the other
46 person sad, ganyan po?
47 Oo naman syempre, 4 years din eh. Although wala pa kami talaga yung..
48 yung grabeng away, pero yung sad moments medyo recent lang. ‘Di ko alam
49 kung siya din pero ako kasi, yung parang.. parang recent lang kasi yung
50 dumami yung responsibilities sa kanya. Parang ako naman, ‘di ko alam
51 kung.. pinangungunahan ko siguro na parang siguro ‘wag na lang muna
52 magsasalita ng kahit ano, kunwari gusto ko siya makasama hindi ako
53 nagsasabi kasi parang minsan, baka pahinga niya nalang din, yung ganon.
54 P3 Tapos minsan parang.. kapag nagtatry siya na magspend time sa akin, kaso
55 ang nangyayari is parang may gagawin din siyang errand kapag.. ‘pag inaaya
56 niya ako.
57 Eh hindi naman sa ayaw ko, parang kumbaga ang sa akin lang kapag ganon,
58 mas prefer ko aayain mo ko hindi lang dahil parang---parang nararamdaman
59 ko kasi is sinisingit lang ako, parang ganon lang naman. ‘yun lang naman
60 pero yung issue ko naman na ‘yun is na-open ko sa kanya and ngayon ay is
parang umookay naman na din.
61 I Since given with the responsibilities, your partner is in college po ba?
62 P3 Oo same lang naman kami.
63 So, since ayun po yung mga sad moments ninyo, kapag po may mga ganon
64 I kayong instances na ginagawa, nakakapagpalungkot po siya sa inyo?
65 P3 Oo.. oo.
66 So, let’s talk about naman yung challenges faced in staying in a long-term
67 I romantic relationship. So, can you explain the challenges or problems that
68 you encounter in maintaining a relationship with your boyfriend?
69 Siguro kasi dahil 4 years tapos ang tagal na naming ding magkakilala, tapos
70 before pa maging kami is parang—may ano na kami. ‘Di pa kami pero
71 parang kami, yung mga ganong label ba na.. Tapos since sobrang tagal na
72 naming magkakilala, tapos 4 years na kami officially, ang mahirap lang sa..
73 tama ba. pagmemaintain na na- encounter ko is hindi minsan namin
125
74 napapansin both na.. nagiging kampante na kaming masyado na parang hindi

75 na namin iniisip na kailangan na pala minsan ng.. Yung parang romantic
76 P3 gestures ba para magkaroon ng spark ulit. Although, nandoon pa rin naman
77 yung feelings pero syempre para mas lalong tumagal, kailangan din talaga
78 ng parang ng mga ganung factor para mas magtagal pa lalo, tsaka parang
79 hindi bilang.. bigla na lang magugulat yung isa. Parang ayaw na pala kasi
80 medyo wala na talagang nangyayari. Kaya ayun yung.. lagi ko talagang
81 pinapansin, tsaka tinitingnan lagi—na parang, uy masyado na kaming
82 komportable, parang kailangan na namin ulit mag-usap; nagkakaroon na kasi
83 ng wall minsan kasi parang sa isang araw or minsan—ako kasi, parang
84 nadadama ko rin na hindi ko feel kausapin, yung mga ganong bagay.
85 Yung nagiging komportable na parang wala na.
Ganun.
86 I Sa pagiging komportable niyo po sa isa’t isa, ano ‘yun di po kayo laging nag
87 uusap with each other?
88 Meron namang ganon. Although, okay lang naman sa akin hindi nag uusap.
89 ‘yun lang kasi, kapag naging komportable ka kasi, minsan parang iisipin
90 mo... kunwari parang iisipin mo.. kunwari.. iisip mo, ‘okay lang na gawin
91 P3 mo ‘to kahit di niya alam’ yung mga ganong bagay ba.
92 Okay lang palagi not knowing na parang hindi na pala okay sa kanya. Parang
93 hindi mo na.. ‘pag nagiging komportable kasi minsan parang, nakakalimutan
94 mo na minsan tanungin din yung partner mo about things na kailangan din
95 parang may say siya kahit papaano.
96 I Sige po. Yung mga challenges na ito, how does it affect you?
97 Ako kasi siguro parang, minsan ine-evaluate ko rin kung tama pa ba.
98 Nangangapa pa rin ako kahit 4 years na kasi wala naman din akong
99 experience pa sa iba. Kumbaga na-ch-challenge lang ako kasi hindi ko talaga
100 alam kung ano yung tama o mali kasi wala pa akong prior experience. Tapos
101 siguro yung challenge lang din sa akin sa ganun is hindi ko alam kung
102 P3 kanino ako lalapit para manghingi ng advice or what. At saka, parang in
103 some way din ayaw ko masyado magsalita masyado sa friends. Kasi parang
104 ayokong may nangingialam. Hindi naman sa nangingialam siguro, pero
105 ayoko lang majudge siguro yung relationship namin pero nag-oopen naman
106 ako sa parents, sa mom ko. So nagvevent out lang ako tapos nag s-say lang
107 siya ng konti pero ‘di naman siya nangingialam. ‘Di lang talaga ako minsan
108 komportable sa friends about sa relationship namin. Ganun.
109 I So yung mga challenges na ito, how do you manage naman.. Yung mga
110 challenges na ‘to in your romantic relationships?
111 Siguro ‘yun, pagiging open talaga. Thankful lang din talaga ako kasi both,
112 open kami sa isa’t isa. Although, yung mga.. may mga challenges din naman
113 kami before like.. may mga ayaw ako na nagagawa niya, may mga ayaw din
114 siya na nagagawa ko. Although, pinag uusapan namin at nagmi-meet kami
115 halfway. Hindi rin naman kami umaabot sa point na parang nagbabangayan,
116 P3 unlike sa mga nakikita ko or naririnig ko. ‘yun lang talaga ‘yun maganda,
117 siguro para sa akin, sa relationship namin. Hindi kami umaabot sa ganon,
118 parang nagmi-meet kami lagi halfway through... nag uusap kami. ‘yun nga
126
119 lang ang hindi lang maganda kapag nag uusap kami is through chat. Yung
120 mga ganung bagay kasi.. uhm.. pansin ko din sa kanya na hindi niya rin kaya
121 verbally sabihin kapag magkaharap kami. Mas nakakapag-open siya kapag
122 through messenger or ano, kahit tawag ganon.
123 Ang way niyo ng pagcocommunicate with each other parang nagkakaiba in
124 I person, kapag sa chat, or sa call?
125 P3 Sorry?
126 Kapag yung way po ba ng pag-eexpress niya magkaiba po ba in terms of
127 I yung mode of communication? For example, nasa call kayo iba yung parang
128 approach niya and yung nasa chat kayo...
129 Actually, hindi kami nagcacall. Chat lang talaga. Kung hindi chat, face to
130 face since magkapitbahay. Pero pag tinitignan ko.. looking back, hindi pa
131 talaga kami nag uusap face to face about something sa relationship na yung..
132 P3 parang seryoso type na usap. Kapag nagkikita kami, anon a lang. Parang
133 nagbabati na lang din kasi tapos na kami maglabas ng saloobin namin sa
134 isa’t-isa through sa chat. Pero minsan din kasi parang nakikita ko na lang din
134 siya, parang okay na lang din na... ewan ko, physical touch nagiging ano na
135 lang din sa akin, parang assurance na okay na, ganon.
136 I Nalalaman niyo po na.. uhm.. okay na kapag nagmimeet po kayo?
137 P3 Oo, feeling ko [laugh]. Feeling ko.
138 Sige po. So, let’s talk about naman the benefits of.. na nakukuha ninyo as a
139 I college student in being in a long-term romantic relationship. So what are
140 the reasons that contributes to you in staying in your relationship?
141 Hindi ko alam, meron ba? Charot. Reasons that contribute in staying.. Siguro
142 iba kasi talaga kapag yung partner is doon ka din nagvevent out. Parang no
143 judge talaga kapag kunwari may mga issues ka sa life na, yung, hindi mo
144 P3 kayang sabihin sa iba. May mga issue din ako na siya yung una kong
145 pinagsasabihan tapos parang siya lang din yung may alam, or kung hindi
146 lang siya yung may alam, siya talaga yung una kong pinagsasabihan na
147 talagang icocomfort ako without saying anything first, parang papakinggan
148 niya lang talaga ako. Siguro ayun lang talaga.
149 Yung parang may masasandalan ka kapag may problema ka. ‘yun.
150 I Can you provide the benefits that you get from your partner? Pwede po itong
151 in general or as a student.
152 As a student, ‘di naman. Hindi naman ako nagpapatulong. Siguro ‘yun ano,
153 siya ‘yun type of person na.. mahilig siyang magpakita ng affection through
154 acts of service. Kunwari, uh.. ihahatid niya ako dito kahit ‘di ko gusto. Hindi
155 naman sa hindi ko gusto, parang ayoko lang iparamdam na obligated siyang
156 gawin ‘yun kasi kaya ko naman. Para naman hindi niya maisip na kailangan
157 niyang gawin ‘yun lagi pag may pupuntahan ako or anywhere. Uhm, yung
158 benefits talaga, kapag may hindi ako kayang gawin. tutulungan niya ako.
159 Pagdating minsan sa bahay kapag may—kasi wala dyan yung dad ko eh—
160 P3 siya minsan yung gagawa. Ang benefit din talaga kasi, hindi lang ako yung
161 nagbebenefit – pati yung mom ko, yung parents ko na tumutulong siya sa
162 bahay. Yung dad ko kasi nasa ano.. nasa barko. And may mga ano siya.. mga
163 motor.
127
164 Gusto niya lagi pinapaandar ganun, tapos sinasabihan niya yung boyfriend
165 ko na paandarin. Nagchachat sila, may sarili silang groupchat na tatlo, yung
166 mga ganong bagay ba. Kumbaga yung sa benefit na may magandang
167 relationship na nabuild siya with my parents is nagbebenefit, hindi lang ako,
168 pati yung family ko. Tapos minsan, uhm, nag ooffer siya, kapag sobrang
169 busy ko, kapag wala siyang ginagawa, maglalaruin niya yung mga aso ko or
170 iwo-walk niya. Acts of service talaga yung kanyang ginagawa.
171 I So, given with these things, how do these benefits affect you?
172 Minsan nahihiya ako. Na parang ginagawa niya ‘yun ganun. Although ano
173 naman siya eh, gusto niya talagang gawin. Pero ako kasi, para lang sa akin
174 na uhm, although gusto niyang gawin.. ‘pag inuulit-ulit niyang gawin ‘yun
175 parang hahanap-hanapin niyang gusto niyang laging may ginagawa siya not
176 only for me but for others din. Ayaw kong masanay siya sa ganoong
177 thinking na, nasasatisfy siya sa—parang nagbibigay ng satisfaction na
178 nakakatulong siya. Although okay yon, pero in terms of hahanap hanapin
179 niya, parang hindi okay sa akin kasi.. pag nag-oopen siya lately sa akin,
180 P3 ganon yung sinasabi niya. Parang ayaw niya na wala siyang ginagawa, gusto
181 niya laging uhm.. may humihingi ng tulong sa kanya. Naaapektuhan ako eh,
182 sa mga ganon, yung thinking niya minsan na... Gusto niya lagi, uhm. Ewan
183 ko, parang napapansin ko kasi sa kanya parang minsan pinababasehan niya
184 ng worth niya minsan yung ganon. Kaya ayoko minsan. Kaya minsan parang
185 sinasabi niya na susunduin niya ako, sasabihin ko ‘wag na.
186 Or siya maghahatid sa akin, ako nalang magdadrive nalang ako, mga ganung
187 bagay. Parang gusto niya laging may pinatutunayan, although sa akin naman
188 hindi mo naman kailangan kasi okay na ako sa kung anong kaya mong
189 ibigay, okay na ‘yun. Ako nang bahala sa iba.
190 For our questions ‘yun lang naman po siya. Tapos na po yung interview.
191 I Brief na lang po namin kayo ulit for our Informed Consent Form. Ito po
192 yung contact number namin if you wish to withdraw po, or ayaw niyo na
193 pong magjoin sa study namin. Ito po yung email namin. Tapos nandito rin
194 po yung contact number namin, tapos nandito rin po yung purpose of our
195 study naming since nabasa niyo naman siya. Tapos yung incentives namin..
196 P3 ‘Di okay na. Ah okay na sya.
197 I Ah okay [laugh]. Tapos yung results of our study namin, i-contact niyo na
198 lang din po kami.
199 P3 Tapos yung results of out study namin, icontact niyo na lang din po kami.
128
Participant 4
Line no. Key Content
Person
1 Good morning so we are conducting our research and its qualitative in
2 nature. Our title is “Experiences of Selected College Students in Metro
3 Manila in Maintaining Long-term Romantic Relationships.” Just to brief
4 I you ito yung informed consent form namin tapos nandito naman yung
5 details kanina and nandito yung contact information namin in case na may
6 questions ka. Your participation is always voluntary and anytime you can
7 withdraw. As per our incentive ibibigay na lang namin sya.
8 So, let's talk about the experiences of being in a long term romantic
9 relationship? How would you describe your experiences in maintaining a
10 long-term romantic relationship?
11 Uhm, ayun. Yung relationship ko naman ngayon, siguro ma de-describe ko
12 sya as “rollercoaster ride” kasi syempre hindi naman always happy hindi
13 P4 naman always kilig kilig.
14 May times naman talaga na dumadaan sa lowest point namin.
15 Pero masasabi ko naman na yung status nami ngayon is okay and masaya
naman.
16 I Bukod doon may iba pa bang experiences naranasan?
17 P4 Experiences.. Uhm, wala naman na….
18 I Pag-usapan natin yung mga experiences ninyo since masaya kayo. Can you
19 tell us about your happiest moments in the relationship?
20 [Laugh]. Siguro yung ano.. yung isa na lang sa mga happiest moments
21 namin.. Siguro noong last year. One time, na.. naisama ko sya sa family
22 celebration naming kasi sa tagal ng relationship namin parang hindi pa
23 P4 kami totally accepted on my side. So parang.. isa ‘yun na happiest
24 moments on my side.
25 For the first time, uhm grineet siya ng Papa ko ganun, and kahit papaano
nginitian din sya.
26 I To follow up, since nabanggit mo na parang hindi siya totally accepted ng
27 parents. Ano ‘yun? Ano yung reason bakit ganun.
28 Kasi ano.. may nangyari na.. siguro.. ‘yun din yung matatawag ko na
29 saddest moment because until now, ramdam kong.. aware kami na hindi
30 kami totally accepted sa side ko kasi unang-una doon is late nila nalaman
31 na may boyfriend na ako and yung parents ko kasi may pagka traditional so
32 P4 parang nalaman nila na parang 2 years na kami and then parang akala nila
33 wala akong boyfriend, tapos bigla na lang malalaman, ah may boyfriend na
34 pala ako tapos ganun na katagal. So ayun.
35 Parang against sila sa relationship naming. To the point na parang gusto ng
36 father ko na parang maghiwalay na kami and all.
37 I Recently lang niya nameet yung parents mo?
38 P4 Recently lang ba.. 2022 like yung nagkita talaga. Pero wala kaming mga
39 formal na meet kasi nga hindi nga talaga open.
40 I Pero kilala siya?
129
41 P4 Oo kilala, ganun, pero hindi kami yung typical relationship kagaya ng iba
42 na parang sobrang open nung family, ganun.
43 Sige since napag usapan natin yung happiest moments niyo..
44 I Meron pa bang ibang instances na naging masaya ka sa relationship na
45 parang tumatak siya sa’yo?
46 Siguro..
47 Yung sinurprise niya ako.
48 Kasi kaming dalawa hindi pa namin love language yung ganun, yung
49 P4 giving gifts yung ganun. Tapos hindi kami yung tao na masurprise, pero
50 siguro isa ‘yun sa tumatak sa akin kasi.. siguro.. 10 months kaming LDR,
51 and then nagwwork na siya that time. Tapos parang wala ako ka ide-idea
52 na umuwi pala siya ng isla kasi taga isla nga kami. Tapos ayun, sinurprise
53 niya ako sa school, parang nagvisit nga siya talaga siya. So ayun talaga
54 yung parang pinakamasaya kasi talaga yung parang pinakamasaya kasi
doon ko na ano na.. yung effort niya ganyan, para madalaw lang ako.
55 I Since napagusapan na natin yung happiest moments niyo, pag usapan
56 naman natin yung sad moments bukod doon sa nabanggit mo kanina.
57 P4 Bukod pa doon sa ano pa yung sad moments?
58 I Oo.
59 Siguro parang may one time na medyo related pa rin kasi doon eh. May
60 moments na muntik kami mag break dahil sa nga sa family issue kasi
61 masasabi ko na isa talaga na pinakamalaking factor kung bakit kung
62 nagkaka-away din kami. May times din talaga na gusto ko nang makipag
63 P4 break kasi nga nahihirapan na ako at na f-feel ko na parang ang unfair ko
64 sa kanya, kasi syempre, super open at super welcoming ng family niya sa
65 akin; tanggap ako, and then pagdating sa side ko, parang hindi siya ano.
66 So parang ako.. naffeel ko na, “Ang unfair ko ba?”, “Hindi niya ako
67 deserve.” Ayun yung isa sa mga saddest moments talaga.
68 Let's move on naman sa sunod na question. Let's talk about your
69 I challenges you encounter or problems in maintaining your relationship.
70 Can you explain the challenges that you encounter or encountered in
71 maintaining a relationship with your boyfriend.
71 Siguro ayun nga nabanggit ko na kanina yung family isa ‘yun sa
72 challenges, tapos communication din. Isa ‘yun sa. Uh.. mga nagiging
73 conflict din namin. Kasi.. parang.. ako siguro ako yung type ng tao na..
74 very vocal ba, na kapag kunwari, naiinis ako gusto ko sinasabi ko na lahat
75 P4 ng emotion nilalabas ko eh sya naman parang opposite.
76 Kunwari, imbes sabayan niya galit ko, parang mananahimik na lang,
77 parang hindi na namin mapapag usapan. Parang ayun, parang doon kami
78 nag c-clash kasi nagkaroon kami ng miscommunication.
79 I So kapag nangyari ‘to diba may mga miscommunication tapos hindi kayo
80 minsan nagkakaintindihan.. How do these challenges affect you?
81 Uh, ano.. Sobrang nakaka-affect sa akin na in a way, kasi ano.. ako.. may
82 pagkaoverthinker ba ganun, so parang kunwari na.. gusto ko kasi parang
83 pag usapan na agad. Eh syempre diba may instances talaga na yung mga
84 P4 away niyo hindi talaga mafifix within this day or night. Ako kasi gusto na
130
85 agad agad maayos. Pero siya since parang na f-feel niya na hindi na kami
86 nagtutugma na pareho na kasi mainit ulo, ganyan, so yung way niya
87 kakalama muna sya hindi niya muna ako sasabayan. Ayun yung nagiging
88 way naming na, “Ah stop muna”, at kinabukasan pag usapan na lang ulit.
89 Nabanggit mo na napag uusapan ninyo..
90 I May iba pa ba na parang mga ways, na uhm how you manage these
91 challenges in your romantic relationship?
92 P4 Bukod pa sa ano.. parang paguusap?
93 I Oo.
94 Feel ko wala na kasi more o pinipilit naman talaga pag usapan, or minsan
95 P4 ‘pag hindi na talaga, gumagawa kami ng extra effort na.. magbibigay ng
96 gift at least para ma-feel namin yung affection.
97 Let’s move on naman sa mga benefits niyo as students students in being a
98 I long term romantic relationship? What are the reasons that contribute to
99 you staying in your relationship?
100 Siguro ano.. uhm kaya ako parang nag s-stay pa sa relationship namin is..
101 isa kasi sa mga tinitignan ko sa isang tao is yung treatment niya ba sa akin,
102 so kunwari maayos yung treatment niya.. nahahandle niya rin ako nang
103 P4 maayos. Isa ‘yun sa mga factor na kinoconsider ko kung bakit kaya nag s-
104 stay kami kasi, yempre aminin natin na may times na nagiging toxic. Pero
105 yung partner ko kasi alam niya paano ako ihandle yung mga mood swings
106 ko and all. Kaya ayun, kaya rin siguro tumagal din kami.
107 I Sige.. so, can you provide benefits that you get from your partner?
108 Yung benefit na nakukuha ko sa partner ko is.. isa kasi sya na masasabi ko
109 na.. pinagkukunan ko ng moral support talaga kasi parang, kahit parang..
110 kahit ano yung mga plans ko, talagang.. siya yung nagsusupport sa akin
111 ‘pag may times na sobrang anxious ako- sobrang nag d-doubt na ako sa
112 P4 kakayanan ko. Alam mo ‘yun, parang may taong nagpapalakas ng loob ko
113 and ayun talaga yung sa tingin ko na isang importante rin talaga sa
114 relationship. Tsaka ayun, sa mental health mo.
115 ‘Pag talagang may taong nakasuporta sa’yo.
116 I Sige.. so.. as a student, the same pa ba yung benefits, or may mga iba pa
117 ba? As a student may mga benefits ka bang nakukuha from your partner?
118 Ano.. minsan na ano.. more on moral support talaga kasi pagdating sa
119 P4 school, like as a student, hindi naman masyado nag a-ask ng help kasi may
200 iba-iba rin naman kaming responsibility?
201 I So yung.. since napag usapan natin yung benefits kagaya ng moral support.
202 How do these benefits affect you?
203 In a good way naman talaga siya nakakaaffect sa akin, kasi as a student
204 may sobrang stressful moments tayo, and dahil sa moral support niya, lalo
205 P4 ako malayo naman ako sa family ko so halos mag isa rin ako. So kahit sa
206 kanya, ah.. nakukuha ko yung moral support na parang kailangan ko.
207 So parang nagbboost din sa akin kahit papaano na maging kalmado, na
208 maging okay.
209 I Ayun lang naman yung for our interview, and thank you. So I will brief
210 yung lang ulit sa ICF namin.
131
Participant 5
Duration: 10 min, 4 sec
person
1 So again my name pala is [redacted] and I would be conducting your
2 I interview this.. What are your experience ba in.. ano.. as a heterosexual
3 student in college in maintaining a long-term romantic relationship?
4 Ano, for me, pinaghalong.. uh.. happiness and syempre yung downside nya
5 P5 yung times na malungkot. For experiences, nag r-range lang sa usually
6 minsan masaya, minsan malungkot.
7 I How would you describe your experiences in maintaining a long-term
8 romantic relationship?
9 P5 Ah.. Yung mga experiences ko kasi, ah, may times na ano, nahihirapan,
10 lalo na long-term kasi eh, for sure yung iba diyan na sa una lang masaya.
11 So, totoo naman na pag tumatagal na yung relationship, may times talaga
12 na parang feeling mo ‘di mo na sya mahal, parang ganun.
13 So far ‘yun lang naman, pero.. ano kasi kami, medyo long term (?) (long-
14 distance) dahil sa Las Piñas siya tapos nag s-stay na ako sa Manila. Tapos
15 ah.. bihirang-bihira lang magkita kasi ako busy sa duty, tapos siya naman
16 busy rin sa school niya.
17 I Ano course ng boyfriend mo?
18 P5 Hospitality management.
19 I Anong year level?
20 P5 3rd year din.
21 I And you are?
22 P5 Third year nursing.
23 I How long have you been together?
24 P5 Six years.
25 I Tagal! So that would be.. 20.. 2018?
26 P5 2017.
27 I So you were together since.. I guess, junior high?
28 P5 Grade.. grade nine.
29 So sabi mo nga na parang iba eh, sa una parang mahal pala, pero hindi
30 I pala. Paano mo madedescribe yung parang challenges nung bagu-bago
31 kayo, tapos yung challenges nung tumagal?
32 Ano, nung bagu-bago kami for me masyadong mahirap yung pagiging
33 legal. Kasi hindi kami legal nung time na ‘yun kasi syempre bata pa. Ayun.
34 ‘yun yung challenges ko nung time na ‘yon.
35 P5 Then feeling ko nitong nagcollege na, nagmature na, uhm.. yung ano..
36 Yung ano.. quality time I think. Quality time. Kasi ayun nga bihira na lang
37 magkita tapos kung magkikita man saglit lang.. kakain lang, date lang.
38 Kung magkikita man, occasion lang- ‘yun.
39 I Ah, may masasabi ka ba, ano yung happiest moments niyo sa relationship?
40 P5 Happiest moment..? ‘Pag ano. Pagka ano, ‘pag sumasama siya sa amin
41 mga family bonding namin.
132
42 I May masasabi ka ba, like the ‘happiest’?

43 P5 Pag bebe.. Bebe time. Bebe time talaga.
44 I Wala yung parang like.. that one moment? Ganun? na nattreasure mo?
45 P5 Kasi for me ano eh basta nagd-date kami na.. na.. like.. whole day. ‘yun,
46 nag eenjoy ako sa ganun kasi bihira lang kami magkita eh.
47 I So parang pantay lahat siya- lagi time spent together.
48 P5 Yes.
49 I So maiba naman, ano naman yung mga saddest moments niyo?
50 Saddest.. Uhm.. Yon, yung dati na hindi kami legal kasi laging galit yung
51 parents ko tapos minsan gusto kami ipagbreak. Pero gets ko naman kung
52 bakit… pero.. saddest siya kasi nahihirapan ako.. nahihirapan ako na
53 ipaglaban ‘yun sa parents ko. ‘yun lang naman yung saddest.
54 P5 Ay! Tsaka ano, pero yung ngayon pala, yung saddest is pagka yung ilang
55 months na kayong hindi nagkikita, tapos kahit anong gawin niyo parang
56 ang hirap gawan ng time or ng paraan. Pero both naman, ‘di lang naman
57 ako yung nahihirapan- ‘di lang naman din siya yung nahihirapan. Both
58 naman kami nahihirapan so nagkakaintindihan pa rin naman.
59 Nabanggit mo nga yung challenges kanina.
60 I ‘Di ba nung una, medyo petty pa. Ano nga yung nasabi mo kanina yung
61 challenges niyo nung una-una pa lang?
62 P5 Yung.. yung ‘di kami legal?
63 I Tapos nung tumagal..
64 Yung challenges niyo yung long term? (long-distance?)
65 P5 Oo.. Oo yung oras. Quality time- yan.
66 Can you explain the challenges and the problems you encounter in
67 I maintaining your romantic relationship, aside from.. elaborate mo pa
68 further what you stated earlier. Like why quality time itself?
69 For me kasi importante yung quality time eh.
70 P5 Pero, uhm.. siguro yung ano, yung hindi na nga kayo nagkikita, tapos yung
71 parang yung communication niyo in virtual.. through messages, through
72 chat, parang hirap din. ‘yun, ‘yun for me.
73 I How does it affect you?
74 Ano syempre, nalulungkot. Minsan kapag ano gusto mo ng ma-ra-rant-an,
75 P5 wala kang ma-rant-an kaya ayun nalulungkot ka kasi..
76 Ang nangyayari kasi sa akin parang imbis na sa kanya ko unang masasabi,
77 nasasabi ko sa iba. So ayun.
78 I Paano ka ba nalulungkot? Pagdating diyan. Oo nalulungkot ka pero iba-iba
79 tayo malungkot.. Ikaw paano ka nalulungkot?
80 P5 Ano.. paano.. umiiyak.
81 I Ano pa?
82 P5 Ako umiiyak lang, kasi pagtapos ko naman umiyak, nailabas ko na lahat.
83 Umo-okay naman ako.
84 I So paano mo naman na m-manage yung mga challenges na ‘yun?
133
85 P5 Pinag-uusapan talaga namin. Pinag-uusapan namin na.. kung pwede

86 bumawi ng communication next week or kung kaya, makapagkita ganun.
87 Though mahirap, pero ‘yun pinag-uusapan talaga.
88 I Let’s say magkaproblem.. tapos the night ba agad mag-uusap kayo?
89 P5 Ay hindi.. siya kasi gusto nya parang inaayos agad that night
90 Ako kasi nasa akin minsan yung problema na ayaw ko siyang kausap that
91 time. Parang ganun.
92 I So as a college student nga, ano yung mga benefits.. na parang being in a
94 For me yung benefits is yung.. support na makukuha sa kanya. Na ‘yun
95 nga, na kahit sinasabi ko na hindi laging may communication pero ano lang
96 P5 naman ‘yun eh, parang maliit lang na percentage ‘yun ng ano eh.. pero ano
97 kasi more than that, support talaga yung makukuha mo sa kanya na parang
98 pag may time na sukung-suko ka na, makukuhanan mo talaga siya ng
99 support na sasabihin niya “kaya mo yan” Parang ganun- so ‘yun, support.
100 I Ano naman yung mga reasons na parang nagcocontribute to you in staying
101 in the relationship?
102 Ano ba.. ah.. ano ba, pwede magbigay ng marami? Una syempre, yung
103 love, ‘di ‘yun mawawala. Pag mahal mo naman yung tao, syempre ano,
104 uhm.. mags-stay ka. Pangalawa yung ano for me.. yung trust niyo sa isa’t-
105 isa. And.. trust kasi, pag wala kayong trust for sure ‘di kayo magtatagal
106 P5 kasi maghihinalaan lang kayong dalawa. And pangatlo ano, uhm.. pagiging
107 loyal na rin parang sa sarili mo. Sa sarili mo parang.. kami, di kami
108 nagkikita, so parang dapat sa sarili mo parang alamin mo na.. na loyal ka if
109 ayaw mong magkaroon ng problema yung relationship niyo. ‘yun.
110 I Love, trust, and loyalty. Ayun yung nagcocontribute sa’yo magstay..
111 P5 Yung pagiging loyal.. ‘yan.
112 I So aside from support.
113 Ano pa ba yung benefits na nakukuha mo sa partner mo?
114 Aside from support? Siguro affection. Affection, kasi.. ‘yun nga kasi
115 nagsstay ako diyan mag-isa sa dorm tapos bihira lang kami magkita ng
116 parents ko. So kahit through virtually, nabibigyan niya ako ng affection.
117 P5 parang.. parang yung longingness ko sa parents ko- parang siya yung
118 nakakapagbigay din.
119 Tapos minsan, affection in terms of.. pwede na rin siguro yung sa.. in terms
120 of friendship. Minsan, ‘yun. Parang pag.. pagka meron kang di maopen sa
121 mga kaibigan mo.. parang siya yung makakapag ano.. fulfill non. ‘yun.
122 So last question for now, at least. How did these benefits affect you? The
123 I support.. the affection.
124 For me ano.. nakakatulong talaga siya. Especially now, uh.. third year and
125 fourth year, pinakamabigat na ano.. Nakakatulong siya for me na, although
126 minsan nag-aaway kami, pero nakakatulong siya sa akin kasi nga ngayon
127 P5 importante yung may makakapag ano sayo eh.. may makakapagbigay ng
128 moral support. So ayun very.. bukod sa love na binibigay niya,
129 nakakatulong talaga siya sa akin na.. nakakapag.. nacocomfort niya ako
130 pag kailangan ko. Ayun.
134
131 I So I think that’s the whole entire interview naman na eh. So ang nakuha ko
132 sa’yo so far, you stay for the love, loyalty, and trust. And for his support
133 and affectionate siya sa’yo.
Participant 6
Duration: 21 minutes
Line Key Content
No. Person
1 Good morning po.
2 Explain ko lang po yung nasa ICF namin. Bali we are conducting research,
3 I qualitative po siya and it is about “Experiences of Selected College Students
4 in Metro Manila in Maintaining Long-term Romantic Relationships.” So
5 syempre, as mentioned po, na your relationship is already three--
6 P6 3 years and 6 months.
7 ‘Yun, fitted po kayo as a participant namin.
8 So, yung mga nakasaad po sa Informed Consent Form naming.
9 I Nabasa niyo naman po and you always have the right to withdraw naman po
10 and you can always contact us dito po. Sige po let’s start. For the questions,
11 being in a long-term romantic relationship, let’s talk about your experiences
in maintaining it. Kumusta naman po?
11 Actually.. ang pagmemaintain? Mahirap. Para lang yan grades, kailangan
12 mong pag-aralan, kailangan mo mag-observe, kailangan mo malaman lahat
13 ng mga hindi dapat gawin, paran sa school lang. Parang sa school lang.
14 Dapat alam mo yung mga rules and regulations. Yung mga basic na
15 kailangan gawin, being responsible, and ganun din sa love. You need to be
16 P6 responsible sa lahat ng action, lahat ng words. And hindi siya madali kasi
17 madaming temptations.
18 Parang estudyante madaming temptations, na gusto nating magpahinga pero
19 kailangan natin gawin yung isang project, or review for quizzes and final
20 examination. Ganun din sa relationship. Ang daming mga tukso, ang daming
21 mga problema na hindi mo naman dapat nararanasan pero nag ooccur na lang
siya dahil sa mga hinaharap natin sa buhay.
22 Based on your response, yung mga nakwento niyo about tukso, naranasan
23 I niyo na po?
24 Yes. Temptation. Nandiyan naman lagi yung temptation eh. Tao lang naman
25 tayo natutukso, pero I know what are my limitations. Hindi naman ako ..
26 P6 although, may mga small, little things na temptation, syempre human tayo.
27 Pero I know na hindi yon sapat na rason para gawin natin yung isang
28 temptation. Ayun, yes naranasan ko na siya
29 Sige po. So, since napag-usapan na po natin yung mga experiences ninyo.
30 I Can you tell us about your happiest moments in your relationship?
31 The happiest moments na naranasan namin, tatlo. First, syempre yung
32 official na kami. Pangalawa, yung magkasundo kami sa lahat ng bagay.
33 Pangatlo, yung nagmeet yung parents naming at parents niya officially.
34
135
35 Syempre yung first ko, bakit ako naging masaya don, syempre yung first na
36 yon, yun yung sinagot niya ko. Kasi yun na yung time na kailangan ko na
37 maging committed sa isang relasyon. Kailangan ko na maging responsible sa
38 P6 lahat ng gagawin ko. Hindi na ako mag-isa sa journey. Kumbaga dalawa na
39 yung nasa isip ko. Kumbaga kung ano yung gagawin ko, maaapektuhan din
40 yung partner ko. Yung pangalawa, nagkakasundo kami. Kasi syempre—
41 although hindi ito yung first time namin magsama, since junior high school
42 pa lang kami, since grade 7, nagkaroon na kami ng mutual understanding.
43 Then naging official couple lang kami noong senior high.
44 So noong JHS kami nagkaroon na kami ng moments, pero hindi pa don yung
45 fully. Kumbaga hindi pa siya nailalabas kung sino talaga yung totoo, at kung
46 ano talaga yung mga ginagawa naming na hindi namin alam sa isa’t isa.
47 Noong masaya kami, nagkakasundo na kami, naiintindihan ko na kung ano
48 siya. Although dapat before kayo pumasok sa isang relasyon, alam mo na
49 dapat yung partner mo. Yes, andon na tayo, pero meron pa ding mga
50 circumstances, meron pa ding mga situation na hindi mo naman talaga
51 nararanasan beforehand. Mararanasan mo na lang siya kapag andon ka na sa
52 isang sitwasyon. So ayun nagkakasundo kami, nagkakaintindihan kami, kaya
53 nagiging masaya kami. Kasi naiintindihan ko yung side niya, naiintindihan
54 niya yung side ko. Yung third syempre yung officially na nameet na ng
55 parents ko yung parents niya. And nangyari lang yon this year since yung
56 father ko nasa ibang bansa. Although nagmimeet naman yung parents ko-
57 namin, pero mother lang, parang hindi buo. Pero now, pamilya niya talaga
58 pamilya ko, buo kami nagsama-sama, nagkakilalahan. So masaya ako don
kasi achievement yon for me.
59 Paano yung course ng relationship niyo? Nagstart kayo since high school pa,
60 I hindi lang kayo official?
61 Ya (Yes). Hindi kami official that time noong junior high school, kasi hindi
62 ako seryoso. Kaya isa yon sa mga happiness noong naging official na kami
63 kasi committed na ko.
64 P6 Noong JHS kasi ako, ang dami kong ineentertain. Student leader, active sa
65 school, so ang daming lumalapit, nilalapitan ko din at ineentertain ko sila. So
66 masaya ako that time. Sino ba naman ang hindi gusto yung madaming
67 kausap, madaming nagkecare sayo, nag-aalala sayo sa araw-araw.
68 I Yung pagmmeet ng parents ninyo, recently lang siya nangyari ‘di’ba?
69 Yung whole family. Nagkikita naman sila beforehand, bago ‘tong taon pero
70 hindi kumpleto. Like mother to mother lang, kuya to kuya tapos yung
71 P6 kapatid niya. Hindi buo, hindi complete family. Pero this year, since
72 kakadating lang ng tatay ko from Dubai, don na nagmeet lahat ng buong
73 pamilya ko actually, tsaka buong pamilya niya.
74 I So bali ano, hindi pa kayo legal?
75 Noong Grade 7 kami, alam na ng mother niya, buong family niya alam na
76 pero hindi kami official na magcouple. Kasi landian lang, mutual
77 understanding. Pero netong senior high school na, official na kami. Talagang
78 P6 legal na kami. Nasa dating stage pa lang kami bago niya ko sinagot.
79 So noong sinagot niya na ko, before pa niya ko sagutin, kilala niya na yung
136
80 parents ko, sisters ko, brother ko.

81 Kumbaga nagmeet na kami pero hindi formal. Kumbaga ngayong taon lang
82 nagkaroon ng pagkakataon na ma-formal since kumpleto yung family niya
nagsama-sama.
83 I Since we talked about your happiest moments, syempre meron naming sad
84 moments. So what are your sad moments in the relationship?
85 Yung sad moments is that yung mga little lies. Para hindi ako magalit,
86 magsisinoongaling siya. For example, kailangan niya nang umuwi pero hindi
87 siya uuwi kasi kasama niya pa friends niya, so para hindi ako magalit
88 P6 sasabihin niya ‘sige pauwi na ko’, yung mga ganun lang naman. And meron
89 kaming problem na pinaka nalulungkot talaga ko is yung nagsinoongaling
90 siya sakin. Kasi before pa dahil sa mga classmates niya noong junior high
91 kami, nagsisigarilyo siya, eh ako kasi hindi ako ganun. So napag-usapan
92 naming beforehand na ‘committed na tayo syempre and tayo na, tigil na natin
93 yung mga nakakasama sa future’, for example yung pagsisigarilyo. May time
94 na alam ko namomroblema siya sa life, tapos patago niyang, nagsigarilyo
95 siya. Tinigil niya na eh kasi sinabi ko. So nagsigarilyo siya, kailangan niya
96 daw ng sigarilyo para pampakalma, kasi ang dami na niyang iniisip. So hindi
97 siya nagsabi sakin. Yung kaibigan ko nakita siya nagsigarilyo.
98 Noon yon. Edi ayon nag-usap kami. Nagalit ako that time syempre. ‘Yun
99 yung nalulungkot ako kasi ganun, nag-usap na tayo, bakit mo pa ko
100 pinagsinoongalingan. Kung gusto mo magsigarilyo, magsigarilyo tayong
101 dalawa. Parang ginanon ganun ko siya kasi nagagalit ako. Tapos eto recent
102 lang, tinigil na niya that time. Etong new year lang, may problem kasi sila
103 noong family niya, tas masaya siya that time kasi new year, tapos medyo
104 nalie low yung family problems nila. Nagsigarilyo siya ulit. Tinanong ko
105 bakit. ‘Masaya ako’ gusto niya lang umano. Edi ako nagalit nanaman ako
106 bagong taon.Nalulungkot lang ako kasi yung sigarilyo alam ko naman na
107 nakasanayan niya yon before. Pero tinatry namin na huwag na kasi mas
108 nakakasama yon lalo na pag may family na. Tyaka may mga sad moments
109 rin ako yung attitude.Girl attitude kumbaga masaya ako sa mga tropa ko
110 tapos onti lang naano ko yung babae kong tropa magseselos na siya.
111 Pero alam niya naman yon nag-usap naman kami. Nalulungkot lang ako kasi
112 parang hindi niya ako naiintindihan na sobrang close lang ako sa mga girl
113 kong friends. Pero naintindihan niya naman na yun doon lang ako
114 nalulualungkot, hindi naman siya big deal.
115 I So bali yung sad moments, yun lang ba yun or mayroong pang iba?
116 Sige, let’s move on. Since napag-usapan natin yung mga sad moments ninyo,
117 P6 pag-usapan natin yung mga challenges faced being in a romantic
118 relationship. So can you explain the challenge or problems in maintaining a
119 relationship with your partner?
120 Siguro yung challenges namin, yun nga nagsisinoongaling siya. Tapos
121 minsan talaga, yon nagsinoongaling siya syempre ang dami naming
122 binabatuhang mga arguments. Puro arguments kami ng arguments. Tapos
123 hindi kami nagkakaintindihan. Kailangan lang naming ng time na—andon pa
124 rin yung love, pero kailangan muna naming kumalma. So wala kaming
137
125 ineentertain friends, family.

126 P6 Magsusulk lang kami, tatahimik lang, tapos kakausapin yung sarili.
127 Hanggang sa mag-usap na kami ulit. Kasi galit kami, ganun palagi pag may
128 problema. Sige arguments, magbabatuhan kami ng arguments, tapos silent
129 muna. Tas after ng silence na yon, parang ‘ano nangyari’ ‘bakit ganun’ ‘bakit
130 mo ko sinagot ng ganito’. So kalmado kami, so ganun yung mga challenges
131 lang namin tuwing nag-aaway kami. Para ma-maintain din naming yung long
term relationship namin.
132 May mga particular ba na mga bagay..?
133 I Kayong pinag-aawayan bukod sa nasabi mo na?
134 Yung sa friends niya. Ayoko kasi ng friends niya. Yung attitude niya minsan
135 kapag nagsasaya ako sa labas, wala na daw akong time sa kanya, imbis na sa
136 P6 kanya ko iniispend yung time ko, sa iba ko pa inilalagay yung oras ko sa
137 kanila. Ayon, time, friends, yun lang naman as of now.
138 I So, yung mga challenges na ‘to, paano ka naaapektuhan?
139 Actually kasi ako napaka extrovert kasi ako, so nakakalungkot. Tapos
140 maluluha ka na lang din syempre, bakit yung partner ko hindi ako
141 P6 hinahayaan maging masaya, naiisip ko yun. Pero at the end of the day,
142 nagsosorry naman kasi siya sakin so ayun. Nalulungkot lang.
143 I So, how do you manage kapag may mga ganitong instances?
144 Ako kasi hindi ako palashare sa iba ng mga nararamdaman ko so kinikeep ko
145 lang siya sa sarili ko. Tapos hanggang mag open ako sa kanya, kasi alam
146 P6 niya naman kapag may problema ako eh tahimik lang ako ‘di ako
147 nagsasalita. Ang cold kumbaga. Ganun lang kinikeep ko lang tas mag-uusap
148 lang kami, ganun lang kami mag-manage. Tsaka nagdadasal ako.
149 I Bale napapansin niya kaya naoopen up?
150 Hindi, minsan din kasi nagsasabi ako kasi hindi ko na kaya, syempre sasabog
151 P6 tayo at sasabog. Kakausapin ko siya, tatawag, magkikita. Palagi kasi kami
152 nagkikita, madalas talaga kami nagsasama, so parang araw-araw.
153 I Taga saan ba ‘yun (girlfriend)?
154 P6 Eto lang yung bahay naming tas kabilang barangay lang.
155 I So, as a college student naman. What are the benefits and paano siya nakaka-
156 contribute sayo?
157 Ang laki, sobrang laki ng contribution niya sa akin. Since, ako kasi, I’m
158 aiming for latin honor this graduation. And sobra akong nanghihina kasi ang
159 daming paperworks, mga presentation, kasi marketing management ako so
160 sabay sabay. So pagod na ako. Just like I mentioned awhile ago, hindi ako
161 nagseshare ng nararamdaman ko sa iba. So minsan yung nararamdaman ko,
162 nararamdam ko, bihira lang ako magsabi ng nararamdaman sa partner ko
163 kasi ayoko nakukuha niya yung pagkalungkot ko, pagkapagod ko kasi ayoko
164 ng ganon. Ayoko na nakakaapekto yung ibang tao sa nararamdaman ko. So
165 P6 kahit pagod ako andyan siya for me to… i-assure niya ako.
166 Actually lahat ng nakakalimutan ko, pinapaalala niya. Tapos, hirap ako
167 magising sa umaga. So nagpapagising ako sa kanya kahit wala siyang tulog
168 sabi ko “okay lang gumising ako ng 4 am?” eh hindi naman ako early
169 people—morning person rather, so nagpapagising ako sa kanya.
138
170 So alam ko maliliit lang yun na mga bagay, pero pag pinagsama-sama mo,
171 isa ka sa mga dahilan kung bakit ko makukuha yung achievement ko sa
172 academic. Hindi lang yon, tuwing may problema ako sa friends ko, medyo
173 na-awkward ako sa ginawa nila, andyan siya para maging okay ang lahat.
174 I So bali as in, partner talaga siya na tumutulong sayo?
175 P6 Oo, like parang… tulungan.
176 I What are the reasons that contribute to you in staying in your relationship?
177 Ahh! Para magstay kami sa relationship ano na contribute niya? Kasi Nakita
178 ko sa kanya na sobra siyang dedicated, committed sa relasyon namin. Kahit
179 P6 pagod siya, kahit may kailangan siyang gawin, nandiyan siya for me. Sino ba
180 naman yung tao na ayaw ng ganun diba. Like parang, iniwan ka na ng lahat,
181 tinalikuran ka na ng mundo. Nandiyan siya for you. Ayun yung mga
182 nagiging contribution niya sa relasyon. Atsaka yung love na pinapakita niya
sakin.
183 So bali, yung love talaga at paano ka niya trinato.
184 I So, syempre ganito nga yung dynamic ninyo. Can you provide benefits that
185 you get from your partner.
186 Provide? Yung ibang tao kasi kung ano yung natatanggap nila, yun lang dn
187 yung binabalik; hindi ako ganon. Money. Kasi may problem sila sa financial.
188 So ako kung kinakailangan na ng money, kaya ko magprovide. Time.
189 Minsan nagkaroon na rin kami ng problem sa time, pero dahil naging
190 P6 problem na siya hindi ko na siya uulitin, mas ipra-prioritize ko na yung time
191 naming sa isa’t isa. Yung mga paghelp sa kanya kasi dentist siya, so ang
192 daming bibit, ang dami niyang kailangan bilhin sa iba’t ibang so
193 sinasamahan ko siya. Ano rin, ang isa sa mga kaya kong macontribute ko sa
194 kanya is yung pagkakaroon ng faith kasi servant kami sa church so ako yung
195 nag-encourage sa kanya na “tara simba tayo, magdasal tayo”
196 I Para sayo naman, ano yung mga natanggap mo na galing sa kanya?
197 Ah galing sa kanya? Yung little things na pagtulong niya sa’kin. Yung
198 pagiging nandiyan niya sa akin. Ako kasi sanay ako mag-isa sa buhay. So
199 ayaw niya ko mag-isa. Bata pa lang ako, yung ginagawa ng pangmatanda,
200 nagagawa ko na. So ayaw niya yon na mangyari sakin. New na gawain gusto
201 P6 niya may kasama ako. Tapos sa lahat ng bagay inaassure niya na okay ako,
202 na may kasama ako, na alam ko gagawin ko, at yung mga reminders na oh
203 eto baka mangyari baka eto baka may makita kang ganito, baka may
204 kaharapin ka nanamang problemang ganyan. So kumbaga nandiyan siya para
205 i-guide ako. Pag ako lang gumagalaw, isip ko lang, point of view ko lang
206 yung nakikita ko, pero yung nakikita noong iba hindi ko nakikita so kumbaga
207 siya yung nagpapakita sakin kung ano yung nakikita ng iba
208 I So bali itong mga ito, nagbebenefit ka, in what way? Nakakaapekto ba yung
209 mga benefits para sayo?
210 Sobra kasi mas lalong lumalalim yung relasyon namin. Ang lalim na ng
211 pinagsamahan namin kasi sa lahat ng bagay magkasama kami.
212 P6 Yung pundasyon ba ng pagmamahalan namin hindi lang sa ‘good morning
213 love’, hindi lang ‘oy kain ka na ha’, hindi lang pang-valentines. Kumbaga
214 through ups and downs nandiyan siya.
139
Participant 7
person
1 Let’s discuss po kung paano kayo nakakapagmaintain ng isang long term
2 I relationship? And nakita ko po sa forms na ang nakalagay ay 4 years
3 mahigit na po kayo diba? How would you describe your experiences in
4 maintaining a long-term romantic relationship?
5 Since nakaabot kami sa ganitong year and month. First kailangan niyo
6 muna accept all your flaws and maintain niyo yung pagiging faithful and
7 P7 loyalty. And also dapat pag nagmamatain ka ng isang relationship
8 kailangan mo ng mahabang pasensya tapos hindi laging sarili yung una.
9 Dapat ‘pag meron ka dapat meron din yung partner mo. Bale give and take.
10 Nabanggit niyo po yung mga factors na kailangan natin para makapag
11 I maintain ng isang relationship. So ano po yung mga na experience niyo na
12 parang nasabi niyo na ‘yun yung mga bagay na kailangan niyo.
13 Sa una syempre hindi mo masasabi na siya na talaga. Kasi magsisimula
14 P7 muna yan sa background ng relationship niyo kung compatible kayo so
15 masasabi mo lang na compatible kayo pagtanggap niyo ang isa’t-isa.
16 I You’re implying po na tinatanggap niyo po yung partner niyo ganun po
17 yung experience niyo? Ganun din po yung partner niyo?
18 P7 Oo.
19 I Let’s move naman po sa mga masasayang moments ng relationship niyo,
20 Can you tell us about your happiest moments in the relationship?
21 Happiest moments, sa tingin ko yung everyday. Once na nakakapag usap
22 P7 kami kumbaga gumagaan loob ko tapos sumasaya ako kasi minsan kapag
23 sobrang overload na din ako siya tinatakbuhan ko.
24 I Paano pong overload, can you elaborate po?
25 Overload means kunyare sa research, may research ka inaayos mo chapter
26 1, 2,3 ,4 and 5 sabay may mga reportings ka pa and quizzes tapos sumabay
27 pa midterms and nag wowork din. So may time na hirap na hirap talaga na
28 P7 hindi mo na alam gagawin mo. Pero once na natawagan mo na mahal mo
29 sa buhay may mangyayari at mangyayari talaga na gagaan ang loob mo..
30 kasi siya yung nag b-build sayo ng confidence na gawin lahat ‘yun.
31 I Meron po ba kayo specific moments?
32 Na pinakagustong nangyari sa relationship?
33 P7 Siguro yung napakilala ko siya sa family ko tsaka napakilala niya din ako
34 sa family niya kasi doon na nabuild yung trust namin sa aming dalawa.
35 I Kailan po kayo napakilala during the relationship?
36 P7 Siguro umabot din kami ng six months, tapos ako yung unang nagpakilala
37 sa family ko muna.
38 I Legal na po kayo?
39 P7 Oo.
40 I So noong una po, ano po ang nangyayari noong hindi pa kayo napapakilala
41 within sa family ng isa’t-isa?
140
42 Siguro may barriers kasi strict so hindi ka pa kilala ng parents, aunties.

43 P7 May mga time na kapag mag papaalam syempre mag dududa kanino ka
44 pupunta, kanino ka sasama.
45 So ayun yung mga barriers noong hindi pa kami legal.
46 I Hindi po kayo pinapayagan or strict lang naman?
47 Let’s say na gumagawa ng paraan para makapagkita. So may time talaga
48 P7 na mag sisinungaling ka. Pero the way na magsasabi ka ng ganun is hindi
49 naman siya mapupunta masama.
50 I Can you tell us naman what are your saddest moments in the relationship?
51 Siguro yung nag aral ako sa (metro) Manila. Kasi since taga cavite kami so
52 hindi niya kasi gamay yung pagpunta ko sa manila. Noong nauna siyang
53 nag aral ng first year college, hatid sundo ko siya doon sa FEU silang
54 cavite. ‘Pag nahatid ko siya, okay na ‘yun tapos sunduin ko siya. Pero nung
55 P7 once na nakapag aral ako dito sa Manila medyo nalungkot kami pareho
56 kasi limited na lang yung time namin magkita, limited na din magagawa
57 namin tulad ng mag date, makapaglaro ng basketball. Parang naging LDR
kami.
58 I Hindi na kayo masyado nakakapagbonding?
59 And yung time na ‘yun hindi na siya pwedeng gabihin kasi nahuli kami ng
60 pinsan niya na hinahatid ko siya sa bahay nila, pero hindi naman sa
61 P7 mismong bahay nila sa labas lang ng village. And ito pa, yung pinaka
62 saddest moment nung nagka-Covid quarantine syempre more on virtual na
63 lang. Makakapagusap kayo through phone kasi syempre mamimiss mo
64 yung touch niyo- yung hug niya.
65 Since nabanggit na natin mga experince niyo, let’s talk naman po yung
66 I challenges na napagdaanan niyo na bilang nag mamaintain ng relationship.
67 Can you explain the challenges or problems that you
68 encounter/encountered in maintaining a relationship with your girlfriend?
69 Siguro yung financial kasi students pa lang kami pareho. Income namin
70 sympere nakabase doon sa parents namin.
71 P7 Limited lang yung resources na magagawa ng money namin. Isa pa is yung
72 wala pa kaming vehicle nung time na ‘yun. Gastos dito, gastos sa ganyan,
73 lagi kami nauubusan ng pera sa commute.
74 I So paano siya naging challenge like nagiging problema siya within the
75 both of you?
76 Uhmm oo, so ang baon niya is 200 ako 100 lang. So syempre ako pupunta
77 pa ng Maynila tapos babalik pa sa Cavite, so matitira saakin 20 tapos siya
78 P7 100. And isa pa hindi nagkaconnect schedule namin dalawa. May time na
79 aabot ako hanggang 7 siya mga 4 syempre uuwi pa ako ng Manila.
80 Aabot ako mga 10pm bago makauwi siya need niya matulog ng maaga
81 para makapasok tomorrow ng 7.
82 I Ano po ba yung mga nangyari?
83 Nag cacause po ba siya ng misunderstanding?
84 Mag c-cause lang siya ng misunderstanding kung hindi niyo parehas
85 P7 naiintindihan yung isa’t-isa. Syempre mag aaral ka and mag aaral din siya ,
141
86 so parehas naman kayo mag bebenefit sa mangyayari after niyo mag aral
87 kaya nagkaintindihan kami.
88 Alam niyo naman po yung prioritize ng isa’t-isa kaya naintindihan niyo
89 I naman po. So yung mga challenges na naexpreience niyo, paano po siya
90 nakakaapekto sa inyo?
91 Makakaaffect lang siya siguro kung hindi ka mag uupdate, number 1 cause
92 ‘yun hindi ka mag uupdate kapag may time na sobrang tagal niya
93 P7 magreply. May mga time na ‘di mo alam kung anong nangyayari sakanya,
94 kung nasaan na ba siya. Pero hindi naman namin hinahayaan na mapunta
95 sa point na pag aawayan namin. The way na hindi ako or siya nag uupdate,
96 we keep updating each other para mapanatag yung loob namin pareho.
97 Yung mga challenges na ‘to, how do you manage na maging okay, parang
98 I nabanggit niyo kanina yung finances, paano niyo hinahandle yung mga
99 ganitong bagay?
100 Nung panahon na ‘yun bumili kami alkanysa. Yung alkansya namin
101 dalawang dangkal na kalaki. Sabi namin everyday mag huhulog kami ng 5
102 pesos or 10 pesos. So bale ibibigay niya saakin 50 pesos per week tapos
103 ako 25 pesos lang. Nag iipon kami para yung ang gamitin namin pang date.
104 Bale hindi na kami bumabase doon sa. kunyare biglaan na tara ganun.
105 May understanding kami na, “Love students pa lang tayo wala pa tayong
106 ganung pera, need natin mag ipon.” then yung maiipon natin ‘yun yung
107 P7 pangdate namin. Kung may extra man makakagala pa nang sobra.
108 And hindi namin hinahayaan na magkaroon kami ng misunderstanding sa
109 hindi pag uupdate. Iniiwasan namin na magkakaroon kami ng away na
110 maglelead sa hiwalayan. Kapag alam na namin na mag aaway na kami,
111 Nagpapakumbaba na ako syempre lalaki. And ang maganda sa partner ko
112 is mabilis din bumaba yung tension or galit niya. After namin mag pababa
113 ng galit doon kami mag uusap nang maigi.
114 Ang way niyo para maayos ang relationship is through communicating.
115 I Since we talked about your challenges in the relationship. Pag usapan
116 naman po natin yung benefits as a student being in a long-term
117 relationship. What are the reasons for you to stay in the relationship?
118 So nasabi mo nga yung staying in a relationship. Nung niligawan ko siya,
119 sinet (set) ko sa utak ko na date to marry, sa panahon ngayon iba na. Yung
120 nacontribute ko sa relationship namin is pinupush ko siya bagay na hindi
121 P7 niya kaya. Accounting student siya sobrang stress, minsan inanxiety na
122 siya ang gingawa ko is communication talaga. Ang nacocontribute ko
123 sakanya is lahat ng kaya ko ibigay sakanya.
124 I Ano yung mga reason kung bakit kayo nag s-stay sa relationship
125 Sa akin kasi hindi siya reason more on validate. Once na tanggap niyo ang
126 P7 isa’t-isa, nandoon na yung contentment. So ‘di na kayo maghahanap ng
127 iba. Wala kayong tinatagong sikreto, nandoon na lahat kaya nag stay ako sa
128 relationship na ‘to.
129 Hindi niyo kinoconsider na may reason.
130 Gusto niyo lang magstay sa relationship dahil sa contented na kayo.
I
142
131 Bale move naman po tayo sa next na question what are the benefits po na
132 nakukuha niyo po sa partner niyo as a student din?
133 So natutulungan niya ako the way na sa assignments sa research even sa
134 financially. Nasabi ko nga kanina give and take.
135 Nagbibigay din ako sa kanya ng financial assistance kasi hirap na hirap na
136 P7 din kami mag provide ng sarili naming pera. So more on financial and
137 communication sa kanya. Kasi sabi niya maupdate mo lang ako or
138 makapag usap man lang tayo, okay na sa akin ‘yun.
139 I So yung mga benefits na ‘yun paano nakakaaffect sainyo ‘yun?
140 Minsan na wawalan ako ng pera, kasi may time na may babayran siya.
141 Hindi siya minsan umaasa sa magulang niya hirap din kasi OFW.
142 P7 And minsan na nakakain yung oras ko sakanya.
143 Pero lahat naman ‘yun ginagawa ko by heart. So di siya gaano
144 nakakaaffect. Bale normal lang din siya.
Participant 8
Duration: 17 min, 31 secs.
Line No. Key Content
Person
3 Siguro marami akong experiences sa past relationships ko na nagbuild up
4 para ma-maintain ko yung 3-year na relationship namin ngayon.
5 P8 Parang yung—naging stepping stone yung mga dati kong relationships.
6 Yung mga past mistakes ko sa previous relationships ko
7 inayos ko siya and nag improve ako para sa partner ko ngayon
8 I Sabi mo yung experiences mo parang dahil doon sa mga lessons na
9 natutunan mo sa previous.
10 Sa pagmemaintain ba, ano yung mga lessons na natutunan mo na ‘yun?
11 Siguro yung mga toxic traits, binawasan ko or tinanggal ko siya completely
12 Like yung masyadong strict, not understanding pero base sa akin ah
13 P8 Understanding na tao kasi talaga ako.
14 Parang hindi ko lang siya maintindihan kung nonsense na yung nangyayari
15 Parang walang logic yung ginagawa niya.
16 I Example ng toxic traits na meron?
17 P8 Ahm, super strict.
18 I Ikaw o siya?
19 P8 Both kami, noong sa previous relationship.
20 I This time around?
21 Ay ngayon, ngayong relationship ko, super complacent naming pareho na
22 Hindi na namin kailan magpaalam, pinapaalam lang.
23 P8 Like for example, “Uy alis ako mamaya ah, punta ako sa ganito, kasama ko
24 sa ganyan”
25 Sasabihin niya lang “Sige ingat ka po”. Not like past relationships I’ve been
26 I What are the experiences of you as a heterosexual college student
143
27 In maintaining a long- term romantic relationship?

28 P8 Through, na ‘pag sinabi ko ‘yun ang sagot lang nila ay pwede or hindi
29 and I think super toxic talaga yung ganoong type of relationship.
32 Mahirap siya, pero you’ll learn it naman.
33 How to maintain a long-term relationship in the process
34 Kasi sa una palang, nagkakapaan pa kayo, your likes, and dislikes
35 P8 kung sino mag-aadjust, bakit mag a-adjust...
36 Uhm, sa katagalan ng panahon, parang months, weeks, years
37 Pag umabot na kayo doon, magegets niyo na talaga yung isa’t
38 Isa at doon siguro yung basehan ko na... kaya kami tumagal.
36 I Can you tell us about your happiest moments in the relationship?
37 Uhm, siguro... ako kasi as an individual, mahilig talaga ako magtravel and
38 alam yun ng girlfriend ko ngayon, and gusto niya rin na sumama sa akin sa
39 mga travel so sinasama ko siya. So parang since nagpandemic nga, nalimit
40 yung labas kasi pandemic couple kami. Pero naman yung... siguro after a
41 year lumuwag na kasi nag GCQ so may mga pwede na kaming pwede
42 puntahan, ganito ganyan. Yung mga family outings pwede na. Pag may
43 family outing kami sa side ko, as much as possible, gusto ko siyang sumama
44 and pinapaalam ko siya sa mommy niya. Minsan pumapayag naman, minsan
45 hindi so yung mga trips namin na ganun, yun yung mga unforgettable
46 moment ako. Tsaka, ‘yun din ‘pag may outing ‘din yung side ng familiy niya
47 iniinvite din ako ni tita. Tapos magpapaalam ako sa parents ko, either
48 pumayag sila o hindi. Pag pumayag, sasama ako ganun.
49 P8 Kasi inaaya nila ako, kasi may company kami na nagrerent kami ng
50 sasakyan kung saan gusto pumunta ng tao. Like travel tour, may mga van
51 kami ganun. So parang, inaaya nila ako tapos rerentahan nila yung van libre
52 na yung bayad ng driver kasi ako magdadrive, tapos ayun mag-oouting kami
53 sa Batangas, sa mga provinces lang na malalapit.
54 I May masasabi ka ba na yun yung happiest
55 Pinaka, may part ba na ganun? Or something na tumatatak sayo
56 Pag sinabing ‘ito yung happiest’?
57 P8 Ah! Dito sa campus. Kasi noong time na yun para kaming nasa movie. Yun
58 yung last concierto ng FEU before pandemic. Umuulan noon, katatapos lang
59 ng Cueshe. Eh ‘di ba kasi yung brakes diyan sa freedom park baku-bako,
60 nagbuo siya ng puddles. Tapos yung mga tao either nandoon sa grounds
61 or yung iba na ayaw mabasa doon sumisilong sa ano—
62 I Sa puno?
63 P8 Hindi. Hindi sa puno, doon sa chapel kasi ayaw nilang mabasa.
64 Kami ‘di naman namin sila agad narealize noong naglalakad kami diyan
65 Papuntang freedom park kasi uwi na kami.
66 Since basa na kami, nagbasaan kami, sina-stomp namin yung puddles
67 ganyan. Tapos nagulat nalang kami pagtingin namin doon sa chapel
68 nakatingin sa amin yung mga tao.
69 I What are your saddest moments in the relationship?
144
70 Uhm, siguro... bihira lang kasi talaga kami mag away.

71 Alam ko naman na hindi healthy ang relationship pag hindi nag-aaway
72 So parang dapat may times na nag-aaway kayo para you know your
73 wrongdoings.
74 P8 So may isa kaming fight na super lala kasi inamin ko sa kanya na at some
75 point, nagkagusto ako sa bestfriend ko.
76 Pero parang mabilisan lang naman, mabilisan lang siya, pero parang nagalit
77 pa din siya and inadmit ko naman na mali ko. Natuwa lang din ako sa kanya,
78 kasi alam niya na yung bestfriend ko malapit talaga kami tapos as much as
79 possible hindi niya ako nililimit na layuan siya. Nagtiwala nalang siya sa
80 akin na yun na yung last. I’ll put a strict line between us at sa friendship sa
81 amin, ganun lang. Ayun, parang yun na yung saddest moment namin.
82 Can you explain the challenges
83 I or problems that you encounter/encountered in maintaining a relationship
84 with your boyfriend/girlfriend?
85 Siguro... Most relationships kasi na long-term nababalitaan ko
86 At some point, na may nagsasawa either sa babae or sa lalaki, or any type of
87 relationship. In my case naman, siguro yung pinakamahirap sa akin, i-
88 maintain na hindi ako magsawa sa kanya. Like gusto ko laging may
89 magspark sa amin na yung fire sa relationship namin hindi siya mawawala o
90 hihina, ganun. I’m thinking of ways na hindi mawala yun, hindi siya
91 magsawa sa akin, ganun. The challenges or problems, siguro time and effort.
92 Kasi yung pandemic din nag away din kasi kami non na, lagi nalang ako
93 P8 yung nag-aadjust. Pero kasi given naman na, ako kasi yung pwedeng
94 makalabas kasi may quarantine pass ako and hindi naman ako kailangan
95 magcommute kasi may other mode of transpo naman ako. Pero noong
96 lumuwag kasi, parang ganun pa rin yung set up namin yun ako pa rin nag-
97 aadjust. Parang nawalan ako ng interest ng slight kasi hindi siya gumagawa
98 ng way para makipagkita sa akin, lagi nalang ako. ‘Yun yung answer ko na
99 you need time and effort para magmaintain ng long-term relationship.
100 I In what ways do these challenges affect you?
101 It affects me positively kasi yung mga challenges na ‘yun. It helps me grow
102 individually sa relationship namin. ‘Di ko lang alam if it helps her too pero
103 P8 for me kasi parang, iniisip ko lang na yung challenge na yun is another wall
104 that I...Kailangan kong i-overcome, kailangan kong talunin para mamaintain
105 ko yung relationship namin.
106 I How do you manage the challenges in your romantic relationship?
107 P8 Siguro, I seek advice from others din. Ayoko kasi mamaya yung pananaw ko
108 sa problema na yun or hadlang na yun is biased. Kaya gusto ko rin kumuha
109 sa mga kaibigan kong babae- kaibigan kong lalaki na parang, “Uy pre tama
110 ba tong gagawin ko?”, “Hindi ba ‘to mali?” ganun.
111 I What are the reasons that contribute to you staying in your relationship?
112 P8 Yung affection ko towards her. Parang, syempre, hindi ka naman magse-stay
113 sa relationship kung ayaw mo na.
115 Kaya most people, hindi ko naman sinasabing lahat, pero most people cheat
114 to get out of the relationship which is mali. Kaya nga dapat kapag ayaw mo
145
116 na, bumitaw ka nalang kaysa magcheat. Panget naman talaga na magcheat
ka.
117 I Aside from affection, what are your other reasons for staying?
118 P8 Hmm, yung binuild up ko na time and effort.
119 Yung investment ko sa kanya. Lahat ng moments na pinagdaanan namin.
120 Kasi nga naririnig ko sa mga older couples, mga mag-asawa na yung love
121 nawawala talaga yan pero yung care mo sa tao, yung memories niyo,
122 nagsestay. Hindi naman sa nawala yung love, pero factor din yun bakit ako
123 nagsstay sa relationship namin.
124 I Can you provide benefits that you get from your partner?
125 P8 Syempre for me, college life is hard compared sa senior high and junior high
126 days mo na you have time to socialize—you have more time to socialize I
127 mean. Ngayon kasi you parang you need to focus more on your career, on
128 your course, para sa future mo. And for sure, may limitations ka sa
129 socializing. So, for me, naging way yung girlfriend ko na parang hindi ko na
130 kailangan makipag-socialize kasi andyan naman siya. Nafifeel niya naman
131 yung needs ko sa pakikipag socializing and you also have someone to help
132 you sa acads mo.
133 Parang tutulungan ka nila ano yung insights nila doon.
134 At may mapupuntahan ka pag may problema ka din. ‘di ko alam kasi parang
135 panget kasi pakinggan yung emotional dump mo siya, pero parang may
136 mapagkekwentuhan ka ng araw mo.
137 At the end of the day, may makekwentuhan ka na ganito nangyari sa class
ko, ganito nangyari sa ganyan ko, ganun.
138 I As a partner, aside from emotional support?
139 P8 Support in other aspects, like she supports me sa acads ko.
140 Pag feeling down ako sa grades ko, kino-comfort niya ako na kaya ko to.
141 Sipagan ko pa, bawasan ko yung ganito.
142 Siya rin yung nagsasabi, ‘mali yung ginawa mo, dapat ganito.
143 Magpaalam ka ng maayos’ ganun.
144 I How do these benefits affect you?
145 P8 It helps me grow individually, yun nga as I've stated earlier pag nanonotice
146 niya yung mali kong nagawa sinasabi niya na agad, like hindi niya na
147 tinatago. Kasi yun dapat yung isang factor sa relationship, yung honesty.
148 Kahit makakasit—masasaktan mo man yung partner mo, at least honest ka
149 hindi ka nagsinungaling kasi ganun yung gusto kong relationship na it’s built
150 on trust and honesty.
146
Participant 9
Duration: 17 min, 28 secs.
Line Key Content
No. Person
1 I Ano yung experiences mo as a heterosexual college student in maintaining a
3 P9 Experience.. Pwede bang specific? Uhh, wait lang, nag iisip ako..
4 Syempre, in terms of pang long-term, aware tsaka prepared ka na
5 magkakaroon ng problems. Kumbaga, totoo yung sinasabi nilang, “sa una
6 lang masaya lahat”.
7 And doon yung part na after niyong masolve yung problem
8 Doon nagiging mas strong yung relationship, and syempre,
Magiging mas prepared kayo para.. kung ano man.. problems na susunod.
9 I How would you describe those experiences?
10 May times syempre na ano siya dramatic, and may mga times na…
11 Mostly ang involved syempre yung parents din tsaka family ng both sides.
12 Tapos, sa.. tawag dito? Pati sa time din ng isa't isa ganun.
13 P9 So, mostly nag- umiikot lang siya sa quality time, sa- pati syempre kung
14 yung in a relationship Ka kailangan mo rin makipag- magkaroon ng maayos
15 na relationship dun sa parents.
16 I Hindi kayo legal?
17 P9 Legal sa tatay, pero sa nanay hindi.
18 I Niya?
19 P9 Sa nanay niya.
20 I Very untypical ah, usually tatay.
21 P9 Baliktad eh, oo.
22 I So, sabi mo nga medyo dramatic, tanungin kita, ano ang saddest moment sa
23 relationship?
24 Actually, twice na siyang nag attempt na mag- na makipag break.
25 Twice na. Tapos, kasi yung- parang mom niya, high expectation.
26 Kumbaga, honor- laging for honors kasi siya noon.
27 Parang, top ng buong batch. Second ba or..
28 Tapos, ang sagot- parang sagot sakaniya ng mom niya,
29 P9 Ako yung naging dahilan kung bakit siya naging top 3.
30 Tapos, yun, habang nasa tumagal parang naging-
31 Na d-deteriorate yung relationship namin sa nanay niya.
32 Hanggang sa, to the point na 2018 'yon or 19.
33 Nag sabi na siyang ayaw niyang ano, nag sabi na siyang ayaw niyang ano
34 Pero yung sa father naman niya, okay lang naman.
33 I Nag break kayo once? Never?
34 Ayun, so nung nag a-attempt mag break
35 Ang sabi ko lang ano ka ngayon eh parang emotionally unstable.
36 Ang gusto ko mag isip ka muna, mag pahinga ka ganun.
36 P9 Kumbaga kasi may pressure ng family, ng acads, yun ang sabi ko sakaniya.
37 Mag usap ulit tayo the next day.
38 Tas yun ang final answer ko
147
39 I Hindi kayo nag break?

40 P9 Hindi. Hindi kami nag break
41 I 6 years nga ulit relationship ninyo?
42 P9 7 years and 3 months.
43 I 7 years and 3 months… So ayun, sa 7 years and 3 months
44 May masasabi ka, ano yung happiest moment ninyo sa relationship?
45 P9 Isa lang ba? Or kahit
46 I As many as you can.
47 P9 As many as you can. Siguro yung pinaka una ano, yung pinaka unang time
48 na ano ba? Parang, kinilig kami parehas is yung- dito rin 'yun eh *inaudible*
49 sa starbucks. 20…2017 I think? Or 16. Niyaya ko siya- ay sabi ko dun
50 samay ano- sa may cashier pwede bang- yung ginawang pastry tapos
51 lalagyan ng "Can you be my prom date?” Tapos, wala. Yun lang.
52 Parang hindi lang siya sure kung anong- anong mararamdaman niya kasi
53 nandun din yung kapatid niya
54 I Kuya? Ate? Sibling?
55 Sibling na ano, mas bata sakaniya.
56 Tas, yun, parang kumbaga syempre parang nandun yung feeling na first time
57 P9 namin mag date tapos, ganun ka formal. Sumunod naman is yung, ano ba?
58 Yung time na nadala ko na siya sa family reunion namin.
58 I Kailan 'yun?
60 P9 Last year lang, 2021- ay 2022 december.
61 I How did you feel?
62 P9 Parang satisfied na, uyy ang tagal na namin gustong sumama- sumama siya
63 sa family reunion.
64 Kasi, kung hindi man bawal siya, or- kung hindi bawal siya,
65 Meron siyang ginawa sa school. Academics.
66 I So, next tayo. So what are the challenges faced by in staying a long-term
67 relationships?
68 Aside from using na, yung sa mom niya naging issue sa relationship niyo.
69 Sa mom niya, yun yung pinaka primary.
70 Sumunod is yung time.
71 Sobrang seryoso niya sa pag aaral.
72 May mga, siguro weeks na hindi nag kikita, may mga days kaming hindi nag
73 P9 uusap.
74 Pero sinusubukan namin mag make up para dun, kunwari after no'n nag
75 Half day tapos dun kami nag ano,
76 Nag- talagang nag p-plano kaming mag bond- magkaroon ng quality time.
Either kahit sa bahay lang, sa outside, sa mall ganun.
77 I So ganun ninyo minamanage
78 P9 Ganun namin minamanage- kumbaga meron- meron talaga kaming-
79 nilalagyan namin ng slots sa calendar
80 I How regular? Let's say, in a week kayong magkikita? Or in a month.
148
81 Hindi naman regularly na parang, hindi siya yung meron reputation na

82 Strict na kunwari this day at this moment.. pero, mostly nangyare siya
83 P9 Tuwing may mga times kaming busy sa isa't isa pareho kaming busy na
84 schedule. Tas san pa bang mga..
85 Nabanggit ko yung kanina yung- pinag b-break kami. Dalawang beses
86 nangyare 'yon. Yung issues sa mom tsaka, actually 'yun lang.
87 I How do those challenges affect you?
88 P9 Yung, in terms sa family naman niya, parang affected kami in terms sa
89 Kung pano kami kumilos ng matino ganun.
90 Parang mas nagiging ano kami, sa mga actions namin. Tas parang
91 *inaudible* Parang nag *inaudible* na maging responsible kami. More
92 responsible sa young adult *inaudible* parang ganun, yun.
93 I Alright, so what benefits do college student get by being in a long-term
95 P9 Benefits?
96 I As a college student, ano yung mga benefits?
97 Pag may- kapag nasa short-term relationship ka.
98 Kasi parang yung paikot ikot lang yung relationship kapag nasa college ka.
99 Na-a-affect yun yung mental health mo
100 Yung emotional.
101 Pati super dami nung ibang..
102 Kahit physical health kasi kumbaga hindi ka- hindi ako nakakakain ng
103 maayos.
104 So, kung other side yun, kung nasa long-term relationship dun.
105 Meron na kayong goals- goals niyo parehas.
106 P9 Meron na kayong definite na goals, as partners.
107 Mas healthy yung mental health kasi kumbaga
108 Mas napagusapan namin ng openly yung problems namin.
109 Tapos, syempre nag sshare na rin ng.. Nag sshare tsaka nag o-offer kami ng
110 tulong Kapag, in terms naman sa academics. Kunwari, meron siyang need sa
111 akin na-gusto niya mag patulong sa powerpoint.
112 Ako gumagawa, tapos sa essay mag papatulong sakaniya.
113 I So sabi mo it affects your mental health parang positively.
114 How..? Can you describe that for me?
115 Like, what positive effects sa mental health?
116 Yung feelings mo ano 'yon?
117 P9 Feelings. So, ayon, bale less stress siya after ng academic hours niyo.
118 Parang, ‘yun na yung- sa end ng day niyo yu na yung- you look forward to.
119 Tapos, ano pa ba?
120 Ayon, kumbaga meron kang- meron ka na rin parang best friend na pinag k-
121 kwentuhan mo ng lahat.
122 Instead na kine-keep mo sa sarili mo, kine-keep mo from families.
123 So, ayun, lahat napaguusapan, napagkwe-kwentuhan.
124 And na s-solve yung problems.
125 I What are the reasons that for you in staying in the relationship?
126 P9 What are the reasons?
149
127 I think nasa values na rin 'yon ng specific na tao kasi, kumbaga ang value
128 ng- ang values ng isang tao parang may nakausap ako no'n eh.
129 Ang babae parang ano lang daw, parang damit, napapalitan.
130 So, kung ganun yung mindset mo pati values mo, wala ka talagang
131 mapupuntahan na long-term relationship.
132 So, parang samin kasi, napagusapan na namin kung ano yung long-term-
133 kung
134 Bakit kami nasa relationship na 'to.
135 So, ayun nga kung bakit kami nag d-date nun, kaya kami nasa relationship
136 na 'to is nakitaan ko na siya ng potential as maging future wife, future
partner for long-term talaga.
137 I Aside from parang..
138 Sabi mo nga, positively na apektuhan yung mental health mo, can you
139 provide benefits that you get from your partner?
140 Tapos kanina as a college student, ngayon naman as a partner.
141 P9 As a partner? Mga advices tapos, ano pa ba?
142 Kumbaga ano, a different perspective sa mga bagay.
143 Kasi kung yung mga problems a-actionan mo ng naiisip- ng sariling
144 perspective mo which is hindi naman masama 'yun. Pero if titignan mo lahat
145 ng anggolo sa isang problema ganun, mag hahanap ka ng ibang opinion diba
146 ms magkakaroon ka ng maayos ng pag solve dun sa problem.
147 Ano pa ba? Syempre, hindi naman mawawala yung, tawag dito?
148 Yung intimacy tsaka yung sex life, which is exciting.
149 Totoo yung sinasabi ni Abraham Maslow?
150 I Alin do'n?
151 P9 Yung ano, yung sex is a parang primary need ng isang tao.
152 So, kung hindi mo *inaudible* sa iba mo siya hinahanap.
163 Hinahanap mo siya sa sarili mo, sa ibang tao- ibang babae ganun.
154 So- tsaka kumbaga, depende din siya kung gaano ka content yung isang tao.
155 So kung hindi siya contented sa partner niya, talagang mag hahanap siya sa
156 iba. So, ayon, nahahanap ko rin sa partner ko yung contentment.
157 I So with everything said, how do these benefits affect you?
158 P9 Ayun, mas naging content ako sa life.
159 At the same time, naging open ako sa mga options sa buhay.
160 Mas naging, ano ba? Ano yon, opportunities to grow. Yun lang.
150
Participant 10
person
1 Good afternoon po. Our research is about “Selected College Students in
2 Metro Manila in Maintaining Long Term Romantic Relationships.” For our
3 informed consent form, nandito naman po yung gagawin namin sa
4 research, paano namin ikikeep yung data and kung paano siya idedespose
5 after. Tapos, you can always withdraw from our study, nandito naman
6 I yung contact details naming- yung number and email. If you wish po na
7 makuha yung results nung study naming, you can always ask po and just
8 contact us. And as for the incentives we will also give you that. Let’s talk
9 about po your experiences in being in a heterosexual relationship. How
10 would you describe your experiences in being in maintaining a long-term
11 romantic relationship
12 To be honest kasi, first time ko magkaroon ng long term relationship. Like
13 literally yung partner ko yung first official partner ko.
14 P10 Medyo nahirapan ako sa una mag adjust since ako yung type of person na
15 more on logical instead of emotional. Mahirap talaga alisin yun sa una
16 nagkaroon kami ng rough start.
17 I As per the struggles po na syempre hindi kayo emotional person. May iba
18 pa ba kayong experiences in the long-term relationships?
19 Since nagkaroon kami ng rough start, pero nung nagamay ko na talaga
20 yung kung paano maghandle ng mga certain situations like yung mga
21 P10 away. Kung paano namemaintain yung happiness, parang naano ko yung
22 satisfaction na tama yung ginagawa ko. Na worth it magchange into a
23 different person para lang dun sa taong pinili mo.
24 I Since we talk about your experience po, let's talk naman po about the
25 happiest moments in the relationships.
26 Siguro yung mga happiest moments is during anniversaries since dun
27 P10 talaga kami nag all-out when it comes to spending.
28 And siguro noong nagdorm ako nung first sem kasi parang yung feeling is
29 live in partner na.
30 I What is the reason bakit siya yung happiest moment/s?
31 Well ayun nga.
32 Tulad nung sabi ko sa anniversary kung saan-saan kami napapadpad kasi
33 P10 all out talaga sa gastos.
34 Syempre yung experience tsaka treasured memories tapos yung sa dorm.
35 Like yung feeling na kasama mo siya every day..
36 Like yung katabi mo siya matulog, tapos approachable kasi nandun lang
37 kaso sa isang dorm. And since fourth year na kami malapit na mag
38 graduation hindi naman na siguro kami mag b-break.
39 So mag lilive na talaga yung sa actual live in partners in the future.
40 At least noong first sem nagkaroon kami ng experience kung ano yung
41 feeling tsaka dapat gawin.
151
42 I We talk about the happiest moments in the relationship, what are your sad
43 moments naman in the relationship?
44 Siguro nagkaroon ng pandemic, like noong nagkaroon ng online classes
45 kasi ano.. yung nagpandemic second year palang kami noon.
46 Paumpisa pa lang kami gaya ng sabi ko hindi pa ako ganun ka emotional
47 P10 person. Sobrang hirap i-ano.
48 Like, almost evevery day nag aaway kami dahil sa mga problems namin
49 tapos yung mga frustrations nung pandemic.
50 Tapos hindi pa kami madalas nagsasama parang nagpipile up siya.
51 I Ayun lang naman po diba?
52 Noong pandemic mas mahirap mag communicate.
53 P10 Tsaka mas mahirap maging intimate kasi laging napupunta sa away.
54 Since tapos naman na tayo sa experiences niyo..
55 I Can you explain the challenges or problems that you encounter in
56 maintaining a relationship with your girlfriend?
57 Siguro yung biggest challenge..
58 Is changing my entire personality.
59 Kasi literal na nung past hindi ko pinapansin yung emotional side ko.
60 Like nirereseaon out ko lahat ng decisions and actions ko. Syempre
61 P10 maapply ko din yun sa partner ko.
62 Since yung partner ko mas focus siya sa emotional stuff sobrang
63 nahihirapan talaga ako mag adjust tsaka ichange yung personality ko.
64 It took almost 2 years para machange ko totally yung self ko pero
65 thankfully hindi naglead sa breakup.
66 I Since naexperience niyo yung ganitong bagay,
67 In what ways does this affect you?
68 Siguro in some way, since nung binago ko yung sarili ko hindi na kami
69 like parang noong pandemic na laging nag-aaway.
70 P10 Tsaka yung mga nangyayari sa amin noong pandemic, hindi na siya
71 nangyayari saamin ngayong third and fourth year so siguro right decision
72 yung ginawa ko. Pero nakakasad din na kailangan mo baguhin yung self
73 mo para sa iba, part naman yun sa relationship so okay lang.
74 I So how do you manage the challenges in your romantic relationship?
75 Like tinitignan ko na siya kung paano siya nakakaapekto.
76 Like pag may away instead na niraration out ko.
77 P10 Tinitignan ko kung may nagawa ako para maramdaman niya yung
78 ganitong bagay so in that way mas nakakapagfocus ako kung paano ko
79 masosolve emotionally rather than logically.
80 Tapos na tayo sa challenges. Let’s talk naman about the benefits do college
81 I students get by being in a long-term romantic relationship. What are the
82 reasons that contribute to you staying in your relationship?
83 Ano kahit na emotional ng partner ko.
84 Like.. let’s say na sobrang responsible ng partner ko. Like alam niya yung
85 dapat gawin tulad ng gawaing bahay. Tsaka yung fact na hindi siya nag
86 give up nung pandemic. Kasi diba yung ibang couples kapag sobrang nag
87 P10 aaway na minsan nag lelead na sa breakup.
152
88 Pero dumating kami sa point na sobra-sobra na pero hindi pa din siya nag
89 give up. Ayaw niya pa din umalis sa relationship namin. Siguro ayun yung
90 big factor kaya ako ang stay sa relationship namin.
91 Since we talk about the reasons. Can you provide benefits that get from
92 I your partner it can be general or being a student?
93 For being a student, siguro sobrang makakalimutin ko siya lagi yung
94 nagpapaalala na may “Uy may homework”, “Uy may part na hindi ka pa
95 P10 nagagawa sa grupo”, ganun. Like lagi niya ako pinupush mag aral kahit
96 sobrang tamad ko. In a relationship siguro yung feeling na lagi kang may
97 person na tatakbuhan tapos yung warn feeling nung love.
98 I Syempre yung benefits na nakukuha natin sa partner..
99 How does this affect you?
100 Parang yun lang din yung reason kung bakit stable pa rin ako. Being a
101 rational and logical person, napapabayaan mo talaga yung emotional health
102 mo or emotional stuff mo and since napapabayaan m, ‘pag once na
103 P10 nakafeel ka ng certain emotions you can’t stop na.
104 You let yourself feel emotions again and ma-a-addict ka sa feeling na
105 maging emotional and since ayaw ko ng ganun, yung main motivation ko
106 not to explode from emotions is yung partner ko.
107 Yung lang naman po, that is the end of our questions. To brief you lang po
108 I again with our ICF, you can always withdraw from our study and nandito
109 rin po yung contact number namin. Thank you.
153
Appendix J
Demographics of Respondents
Demographic Characteristics of the Participants
Duration of
Participant Age Sex Year Level Romantic
Relationship
P1 21 F 4th Year 5 years and 1
month
P2 23 F 4th Year 3 years 10 months
th
P3 22 F 4 Year 4 years and 2
months
P4 22 F 4th Year 7 years
P5 20 F 3rd Year 6 years
P6 21 M 4th Year 3 years and 6
months
P7 23 M 4th 4 years and 5
months
P8 21 M 3rd Year 3 years
nd
P9 22 M 2 Year 7 years and 3
months
P10 22 M 4th year 3 years
154
Appendix K
Researchers Bionote
Patricia Lyn C. Genoves is one of the members of the research

group, born in Quezon City, Philippines in 2000. She was a
consistent academic honor awardee during her High School and
Senior High School years, and graduated with High Honors on
2019 after taking the strand Humanities and Social Sciences
from Our Lady of Fatima University. In 2019-2022, she was a
Dean's Lister in Far Eastern University under the Bachelor of
Science in Psychology program.
Danielle D. Espino is the leader of the research group, born in

Mandaluyong City, Philippines in 2000. In 2018, she was an
academic honor awardee from Lyceum of the Philippines
Laguna, and graduated in 2019 after taking the strand
Humanities and Social Sciences in senior high. In 2019-2020,
she was a Dean’s Lister while taking Bachelor of Science in
Psychology in Far Eastern University Manila, and in the
creatives department of the organization FEU Psywan under
FEU Psychology Society.
Angel M. Diza is a member of the research group, born in

Dagupan City, Philippines in 2001. In 2017, she was awarded
with academic honor from Dominican School Dagupan City, and
graduated in 2019 after taking up Science Technology
Engineering and Mathematics in senior high. In 2019, she was
part of the FEU Psychology Society under the athletics and
cultural department.
155
Johanna S. Belesta is one of the researchers of the study and

resides in Quezon City. She has worked part-time for a solar
energy company under the Research and Development
Department and was a Dean’s Lister for the first semester of
academic year 2019-2020 during her stay in Far Eastern
University under the Bachelor of Science in Psychology
program.
Patrick Ravi M. Angeles is one of the researchers of the study.

He attended Caritas Don Bosco school from 2008 to 2019, and
Far Eastern University Manila from 2019 to 2023. He attained
experiences and garnering accolades in sports, journalism,
debating, leadership, and advocacy. He was also a varsity team
captain and publication organization as a sportswriter during
secondary school. In tertiary school, he was a part of the
Oratorical and Debate Council as an officer; FEU Psychology
Society as an athlete, executive committee member and
consultant; and in an Advocacy Organization against bullying as
an Officer/Ambassador.
Angela E. Oandasan is one of the researchers in this study who

lives in Antipolo, City, Rizal. She attended her Junior High
School years in Antipolo and continued her final years of Senior
High School at FEU – Senior High in Manila where she took the
strand Science Technology Engineering and Mathematics.
Currently, she is an undergraduate student studying at the same
school of Far Eastern University – Manila taking a degree in BS
in Psychology. Although she did not join any organization
during her first few years in college, she has been a consistent
Dean’s lister ever since her first year until the 2nd semester of
her 2nd year and actively participates in lectures run by the
Institution/Department she belongs to.

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I

Experiences of Selected College Students in Metro

A Thesis Submitted to the Faculty of the

In Partial Fulfilment of the Requirements

Angeles, Patrick Ravi M.

This undergraduate thesis entitled “EXPERIENCES OF SELECTED COLLEGE

Anna Patricia Sevilla, RPsy Maria Daniela Anne Samaniego, MA

Dr. Eda Lou Ochangco

Approved in Partial Fulfillment of the Requirements for the degree Bachelor of

Dr. Myra Landagan

We, the authors of this thesis entitled “EXPERIENCES OF SELECTED COLLEGE

1. This paper is the product of our own work.

We also understand that we can be appropriately sanctioned by Far Eastern University

Angeles, Patrick Ravi M.

Anselmo Edwin Aruelo, MBM, DipWLD

shops, giving incentives, etc.

professor, who is so patient in guiding us in writing, answering our queries regarding

To Mr. Anselmo Edwin Aruelo for accepting us to be his research advisee

loads of tasks that we need to do.

Title Page ……………………………………………………………….................. i

CHAPTER 1. INTRODUCTION …………………………………………………........... 1

The purpose of this study was to investigate the experiences of

selected heterosexual college students in Metro Manila in maintaining long-term

qualitative method to gain a deeper understanding of the experiences of the study's

influenced by internal factors as well as external factors coming from academic

responsibilities, perception and expectations from their families. Satisfaction of the

lifestyle that exhibits moral, mental, emotional, and financial support.

Being in a romantic relationship is delightful, but it is more ideal when it lasts

can differ (Gonsalves, 2021). A romantic relationship is a type of relationship where

casual dating, casual sex, situationship (definition) or ethical nonmonogamy.

such as “boyfriend/girlfriend”, “significant other”, or “partner” to give a clear

identification of their involvement to each other. People in such relationships strive to

They also seek improvement to encourage growth in the relationship.

The long-term duration of romantic relationships is still subjective at this day

Relationships have their own advantages and downsides to humans. According

to University of Utah (2023), it is good to be engaged in loving relationships as it

greeting street vendors, saying hello to a favorite cashier, or greeting classmates or

that by improving relationships, there is a positive and beneficial effect on mental

Inversely, there are negative effects of romantic relationships to people. As

of respect, hurting the other person, and drifting away.

and explore in terms of romantic relationships, especially on what set up do they

while others stay strong and persist long after graduating.

relationships. As students engage in these activities, they experience emotions and

accumulate behaviors that may affect their decisions. Experimentations on different

people to engage in dating experiences. Different times, environment, and

circumstances change the nature of romantic relationships as well.

this paper, it will mainly focus on the dynamics of heterosexual relationships. To

elaborate, heterosexuality is a sexual orientation in which two people of the

desire. According to Poole (2017), as heterosexuality gained acceptance, it was

likewise institutionalized through state, legal, medical, psychiatric, and media

lives. The "nuclear family" is built on heterosexuality, which is institutionalized in

modern societies as the only acceptable means of reproduction. It is a gendered

domestic, emotional, economic, and other divisions of work and resources.

even vital to their development (Orbigo, 2017).

The Investment Model of Commitment Process

The Investment Model was derived from the interdependence theory by

to instead understand the circumstances and remain in the relationship. To further

investment of a couple will be lost if their relationship is to be ended over a difficult

are highly committed, which results in persistence. They transform unpleasant

Though the downside to this is they have the tendency to overlook

remain in a relationship with each other.

A Triangular Theory of Love

The Triangular Theory of Love was proposed by Robert Sternberg (1986;