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DANCING WITH YOUR PARTNER FROM BEHIND GRINDING WHILE

DANCING » RAUNCHY DANCING

How to Grind (for Guys)

Co-authored by William Orrock
Last Updated: November 26, 2022 References

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Grinding is a fun and risque type of dancing that’s

just as common at high school dances and
wedding receptions as it is at nightclubs. The
movement itself is simple—find a willing partner,
move in close, and “grind” your hips together to
the rhythm of the music. Grinding can be an
exciting way to turn up the heat on the dance floor,
whether you do it facing each other or behind your
partner. Since it’s a suggestive form of dancing,
however, it’s best to only break it out when you
know your partner is into it.

Method 1 of 2:
1 Dancing with Your Partner from
Behind

Place your hands on your partner’s hips.

1 If you partner turns their back to you at any
point, let your hands slide down until they’re
resting on their hip bones. This will allow you to
feel their movements more closely, and will also
give you a little bit of control if you decide to
change up your technique.[1]

It’s normal for the person in the rear to hold

onto their partner’s hips. Even so, be sure to
lower your hands slowly so that your partner
will have a chance to say something if
they’re not okay with it.
Don’t venture any further unless you’re
explicitly told that it’s alright to do so.
Unwanted touching is still inappropriate,
even while grinding.

Move your hips together in unison. Bend

2 your knees slightly and sway from side to
side. From there, you can begin moving in
circles, or experiment with any other movements
that suggest themselves to you in the heat of the
moment.[2]

Depending on your height, you may have to

stand up taller or put a little extra bend in
your knees to keep even with your partner.

Let your partner take the lead. Grinding is

3 all about getting in synch with your partner,
so stick close enough to keep your hips against
your partner’s throughout the dance and try to
mirror their movements. Allow your partner to call
the shots when it comes to things like what
movements to use and how much touching there
is in various places. Being a good partner is all
about respecting the person you’re sharing the
floor with and adjusting your style to suit theirs.[3]

The more chemistry you have with your

partner, the more likely they are to step up
the amount of contact between you.
When you allow your partner to take the lead
and follow their cues, the dynamic will feel a
lot more natural. It'll be easier for you to both
relax and loosen up as you dance.
If you fall into a rhythm and trust your partner
as they walk you through what they're
comfortable with, then you'll also build more
confidence during the whole dance.

wikiHow

Lean to the side to cut down on

4 unwanted contact. If you’re dancing with
someone you don’t know, or just don’t feel like
dancing too close, you can tilt slightly to one
side. Your partner will lean in the other direction.
That way, you’ll be grinding on your your leg
more than your lap.[4]

Pay attention to signs that your partner is

hesitant to continue dancing so close. If their
movements slow or stop or they try to pull
away, for instance, it’s best to create a little
distance.

Change up your movements every so

5 often. It wouldn’t be very fun if just you
stood there and rocked your hips back and forth
the entire time. To keep things fresh, try cycling
between different movements every couple of
minutes, or take turns leading and following. You
may only have until the end of the song to enjoy
your connection with your partner, so make it
count!

If you and your partner are on the same

page, you could even try dropping it low,
dipping to opposite sides, or improvising
your own embellishments.
Another simple way to make grinding more
interesting is to alternate between dancing
from the front and back.

Don’t assume that grinding is an

6 invitation for anything more. Just because
your partner was willing to grind with you, doesn’t
that they’re up for anything beyond that. People
often come to a club just because they want to
dance, not looking for hook-ups. If your partner
seems interested in you though, you can always
ask them out, but be prepared to respect their
answer.[5]

If your partner walks away after the song

ends, don’t chase them. Instead, appreciate
the fact that you had a chance to dance
together and start looking for a new partner.

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Method 2 of 2:
2 Grinding While Facing Your
Partner

Find a willing dance partner. While you’re

1 doing your thing on the floor, search the
crowd for someone to dance with. Holding eye
contact, smiling, and frequent touching are all
strong signs that someone wants to dance. Once
you’ve selected a partner, move in and prepare
to get physical.

If you’re not sure whether the person is

picking up on your signals, just walk right up
to them and ask, “Hey, wanna dance?”
Sometimes, someone may shoot you a
fleeting glance or brush up against you by
accident. If they spend the next few
moments ignoring you or migrating to
another part of the floor, don’t assume
they’re playing hard to get—they’re probably
just not interested.

Rub your hips against your partner’s with

2 the rhythm of the music. Once you’ve
gotten up close and personal with your partner,
time your movements to the tempo of the song.
Move your hips back and forth against your
partner’s. Coordinate the “upswing” of your hips
to the beat to increase and decrease the
pressure in turns.[6]

Try grinding at different speeds to match

whatever music is playing. You can move
faster during songs that are upbeat and
energetic, then slow things down with the
music for a more sensual experience.
Remember, grinding is a form of dancing, so
the more rhythmic you make it, the more
enjoyable it will be for both you and your
partner.

Try putting your hands on your partner's

3 hips. Once you’ve been dancing for a
moment, try putting your hands on your partner’s
hips and ask them if it’s okay. If they move your
hands away, or tell you not to put your hands on
them, just remove your hands. You can still
dance, while moving your arms to the beat of the
music.

Don’t get touch them places other than their

hips unless they move your hands there. You
don’t want to creep out your partner!

Add some light chest bumps. Face your

4 partner squarely and pull your shoulders
back so that your chest presses into theirs. Then,
move your body away from your partner. Do this
a few times and see if your partner catches on.[7]

Keep your posture straight and lift both your

chest and your chin. Roll your shoulders
back and down so they appear wider, too.
You'll look really sure of yourself, which will
be attractive to your partner.
You can also mix up the chest bump by
doing a wave motion with your upper body.[8]
Do your best to synchronize your
movements with your partner’s.

Work in some hip rolls to switch things

5 up. Jut your hips forward to one side. As you
do, your partner will pull theirs back on the same
side. Keep your lower bodies locked together as
you continue rolling to the opposite side, then
change directions—they’ll stick their hips out and
you’ll pull yours back.[9] #*You can roll whichever
way feels most comfortable, but most people will
instinctively move in a clockwise direction.[10]

The circular motion of hip rolls is similar to

the one you’ll use when grinding on your
partner from the back.

Community Q&A

Question

How can you get better at rolling your hips

while you're dancing?

William Orrock
Professional Dancer & Instructor
Expert Answer

You can get better at rolling the hips by

practicing slowly making a "figure 8" with your
pelvis. When you roll your hips, focus on
moving them side to side. Stick to swinging
your hips in rotations that are between the
width of your shoulders. Also remember to tilt
your pelvis forward and backward to get a
better feeling for all the different directions that
your hips can move in.
Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0

Question

Should I be twerking while he is grinding on

me?

Community Answer

You don't have to, but if you want to turn him on

or make the grind more intense you can.
Helpful 56 Not Helpful 9

Question

What should my face expression look like?

How should I react?

Community Answer

Smile, maybe even look back at your partner.

It's nice to know one's partner is into the dance.
Helpful 32 Not Helpful 6

See more answers

Ask a Question

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Video

Tips

You may get rejected a few times before you

find someone willing to grind with you. That’s
okay—grinding is not everyone’s cup of tea. Just
make sure you respect their decision rather than
trying to force them to do something they don’t
want to do.
Helpful 6 Not Helpful 1

If you’re not sure whether you can grind to a

particular song, follow your partner’s lead, or
take a look around the floor to see what the
other dancers are doing.
Helpful 4 Not Helpful 1

Warnings

Make sure you’re familiar with the rules on the

dance floor. Grinding is frowned upon at many
school and formal functions, and may even be
banned outright.[11]
Helpful 0 Not Helpful 0

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References

1. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=cXEGSdTOSW4&feature=youtu.be&t=23
2. ↑ https://dancepoise.com/learn-to-grind-dance
3. ↑ https://ourpastimes.com/how-to-grind-with-
guys-12137346.html
4. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=4s21sg0goqM&feature=youtu.be&t=128
5. ↑ https://www.voxmagazine.com/arts/the-
language-of-grinding/article_c8bbc746-83c1-
5dfb-a2b1-5191c4c3d08a.html
6. ↑ https://dancepoise.com/learn-to-grind-dance
7. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=vRzN5WuDj2Q&feature=youtu.be&t=43
8. ↑ https://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=vRzN5WuDj2Q&feature=youtu.be&t=43
9. ↑ https://ourpastimes.com/how-to-grind-with-
guys-12137346.html

More References (2)

About This Article

Co-authored by:
William Orrock
Professional Dancer & Instructor

This article was co-authored by William Orrock. William

Orrock is a Professional Dancer, Instructor, Group Fitness
Instructor, and the Owner of We Evolve Dance. With more
than 22 years of experience, he specializes in
performance, social dancing instruction, competitive
dance preparation, and wedding choreography. William
holds a Bachelor's degree in Contemporary Dance with a
minor in Choreography from Universidad Las Americas-
Chile and a second minor in Acting from Foothill College
Acting Conservatory. He is also a national champion in
Latin American Dancing, a former dancer for Dancing with
the Stars Chile, and a certified judge for ballroom
competitions. This article has been viewed 796,787 times.

Co-authors: 45
How helpful is this? Updated: November 26,
2022
Views: 796,787

Categories: Raunchy Dancing

Article Summary

In other languages:
Español: perrear (para
hombres)
Français: danser le
perreo (pour les
garçons)
Nederlands: Grinden
(voor jongens)
Bahasa
Indonesia: Melakukan
Grinding (untuk Pria)

Thanks to all authors for creating a page that

has been read 796,787 times.

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